Proof of life (Adore pt 3)
Hello my sweet angel babies ♥️
I'm not going to be able to adequately express my gratitude for the steady stream of love (and concern, sorry) I've been receiving over the past couple of months. I'm so sorry I've been AWOL, it will definitely happen again. Because see, for me, I usually have to make a choice between social and creative fandom participation. My battery is small, and takes a long time to charge.
Thank you to everyone who's left comments and asks and DMs since I've been gone. I don't think I can respond to all of it, but rest assured those messages ping my cold, dead heart every time I see them.
So I'm gonna go out on a limb here. I did this same thing months and months ago, when I was working on Head Over Feet, and let me be clear: posting even a single word of a WIP goes against my every instinct and principle as an author. I am someone who likes to finish an entire story before I post any of it, and on top of that, I am NOT a fast writer, so the expectations that I'm setting up here might not be advisable. But I did it before and managed to finish the thing, and I want to give you guys something in exchange for being so unbelievably awesome, so here I am again.
This will probably be the only time I mention this story in public until it's finished and posted, and inquiries about my progress are unlikely to help with the writing process, I'm just saying. I reserve the right to change every last word of this before the final draft, and I also reserve the right to fall off the face of the planet and simply never finish it, as much as I will strive to prevent that from happening. Please be patient with me.
Anyway, here is my paltry offering to say thanks for the love: the (VERY rough) first ~1300 words of the third instalment of The Adventures of Soft Daddy and Danger Twink.
Sirius secures his handheld shower head to its holder at the edge of his clawfoot tub, and steps out carefully onto the bathmat. He shivers in the cool air outside the shower curtain; it's about twenty degrees below zero outside, so even if he could afford to run his ancient radiator at full blast, it probably wouldn't help much.
He dries himself off and checks his reflection in the mirror, turning his face this way and that as he tugs his hair out of the bun he'd piled it into to keep it dry during his shower. There's no need for makeup tonight, not when he's not even planning to put on clothes.
It's incrementally warmer when he steps out into the main room of his apartment. He gathers an array of splayed text books and notes from his bed and dumps them carelessly onto the couch, then closes his new laptop and places it delicately on the coffee table. It's the most expensive thing he owns, save for the Gucci backpack currently sitting in his wardrobe with a three-inch berth around it like his shoes and other bags might somehow contaminate it. It's weird owning rich-people stuff when you are still, objectively, broke as fuck.
He perches on the edge of his bed and sets his phone to charge, because his battery doesn't even last a day anymore, and he's going to need it this evening. He tucks it in next to his pillow and picks up his new toy.
The plug isn't much larger than the one he already has. A little longer, which is appealing, but no wider, so it shouldn't be a challenge to get it in comfortably. He disconnects it from its charger and hefts it in his hand, feeling the added weight from the electronics inside.
He picks up his phone, and hesitates when he sees the notification waiting for him.
Rieka: let's go out tomorrow
Rieka: the fact that we haven't been drunk since the term started is criminal
Rieka: we've had two chem labs and zero drinks
Sirius purses his lips, thumbs hovering over the keyboard. There's a fine line here, and he hasn't quite found it yet.
Me: got plans
Me: raincheck?
So complete avoidance is the best strategy, right?
Rieka: booooo 👎
He sighs, but at least she's not asking for an explanation. He opens a different conversation then, pushing all thoughts of Rieka Lupin into a tidy, sealed compartment, not to be opened during certain activities with a certain relative of hers.
Me: i'm ready
Me: are you in your office?
Daddy: Yup, I've got a few minutes
Daddy: Want me to call?
Instead of answering, Sirius hits the call button himself.
"Hey baby," Remus answers. His voice is already smooth and honey-sweet, and just from that, Sirius knows he's planning to lay it on thick tonight.
"Hi daddy," Sirius says with a smile. "Should I put it in now?"
There's a low chuckle over the line. "Are we feeling eager?"
"Always," Sirius says, laying back on his bed.
"Use the good lube I got you, it's gonna be in there a while."
He switches the call to speaker, and snags the bottle from his nightstand. "I threw out the old stuff, you've got me ruined for cheap lube."
"Only the best for that ass," Remus says, and Sirius can hear his smirk.
He gives the plug a liberal coating, running his fingers along its shape, his dick twitching just at the feel of the silky-smooth silicone, at the anticipation of what's about to happen. He spreads his legs wide, drawing one knee up to give himself easier access.
"Take it slow," Remus says, succinctly heading off Sirius' impulse to just shove the thing inside himself in one go. "Rub the tip against yourself, so you're nice and wet."
Sirius shuts his eyes as he obeys, sliding the slick end of the toy over his entrance. "Okay."
"Are you going to be a good boy for daddy tonight?"
"Uh-huh," Sirius says, teasing the very tip of the plug in and out of his hole.
"Tell me how."
"I'm not gonna touch."
"You're not gonna touch, and you're not gonna come."
"Yeah," Sirius says. His cock is starting to harden as his body tries to draw the plug inside. "Can I put it in, daddy?"
"Slow," Remus reminds him, "Slide it in nice and slow for me, baby."
Sirius catches his lip between his teeth and tries to push the plug in slowly, the way he knows Remus would do if he was here.
The shower has left him relaxed and more than ready, and it's hard not to take advantage, just press the toy in to its limit because he can. But he's working on his patience -- under Remus' careful tutelage -- so he shuts his eyes and tries to savour it, the tease of the plug's rubber tip at his entrance, the slow stretch as he eases it past the slight resistance before he sighs, and his body eagerly accepts the intrusion.
"Mmmm," Sirius sighs as he settles the base of the plug flush against his entrance, shifting his hips and feeling the constant, dull pressure against his prostate.
"How's it feel?"
"Good," Sirius says, splaying his legs out and just enjoying the pleasant fullness. It's been almost a week since Remus last fucked him, and that's just way too long. Christmas really spoiled him. He tugs the blankets up around him, because it's going to take some time before his body temperature is high enough to fight against the chill in his apartment.
"Have you tried out the settings at all?" Remus asks him, and Sirius picks up the phone, switching off speaker and holding it to his ear.
"No," he says, grinding his ass down against the bed to test the plug's reach inside him. "I thought you'd rather do the honours."
Remus hums, and Sirius hears the phone shifting in his grip. "I'm gonna turn it on, okay? Lowest setting."
"O--" Sirius stutters as the plug buzzes to life inside him, nestled snug against his prostate and sending little zings of pleasure down his legs. "Fuck that feels good. That's the lowest setting?"
"It is," Remus confirms. "Want to run through them all, see how high it goes? Or would you rather be surprised?"
"Mmmm, surprise me."
"Surprise it is," Remus says, and Sirius hears shuffling papers in the background as he prepares for his night class. Psychology 1001, Thursdays, 7-9:30PM. Two and a half hours of a lecture that Remus swears he's given so many times he could recite it in his sleep, so why not give himself something fun to focus on while he goes through the motions?
Being privy to all of this brilliant, upstanding man's secret perversions is a privilege Sirius does not take lightly.
"You can turn it off from the app if you need to," Remus is saying, "Or you can call me and I'll switch it off. My phone's on vibrate, so I'll see it right away."
Sirius smiles to himself. "Got it," he says, though this is a rehashing of the rules that Remus had laid out when he'd brought the plug over last weekend. He'd called it a "late Christmas gift", as if he hadn't already given Sirius several thousand dollars worth of presents on Christmas morning.
There's more rustling over the line, the squeak of a chair.
"Tell me again how you're going to be good tonight."
"I'm not gonna touch myself, and I'm not gonna come." The toy is still buzzing away inside him, making everything a little fuzzy at the edges.
"Tell me why."
"'Cause daddy's in charge, even when he's not here."
"Good boy."
Sirius squirms with pleasure, his cock smearing a little drop of fluid on his belly as the toy hums insistently at his prostate.
"I have to head out," Remus says. "How do you feel?"
"Good," Sirius says, his abs tensing as he shifts his legs and the angle of the toy changes. "Excited."
"Me too," Remus says softly. "I'll talk to you soon, beautiful. Send me some pictures." With a low beep, the call disconnects.
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re the palestinian bird thing: different anon here, idk what they meant but it’s worth noting that, in addition to political fuckery, that the campaign to remove the word “palestine” from the bird's name might have partially been an attempt to correct a bit of historical revisionism. the only reason that region of the world is commonly known as palestine today in the first place is because the roman empire renamed the area to “syria palaestina” after the roman-jewish wars. they had previously allowed the province to be called judea/judaea, as in jews and the jewish kingdoms that existed there before being conquered. and it wasn't until much later that the arabs now known as palestinians came to be. (disclaimer: I don't speak hebrew and can't be bothered to track down hebrew articles from a decade ago to translate by hand to fact check how much this played into the bird thing but it is a reasonable possibility and an understandable one, as jewish heritage has been so often destroyed and erased. regardless, the palestinian response to make the bird a symbol is equally understandable.) relatedly, be careful about the phrase “from the river to the sea”, because while it's sometimes about palestinian liberation, it's also often used as a dogwhistle that means “kill all jews in the levant”; and the dogwhistle version has become increasingly common as of late. look into the organization called standing together for antisemitism-free activism and jewish/palestinian solidarity.
I see what you mean, the history you mentioned seems to check out and it's unquestionably been a tumultuous part of the world that's been given a lot of different names over time. However I don't really feel comfortable in agreeing it was combating revisionism because it happened during what I understand to be a violent occupation. Without a source or truly knowing the intentions it's just kind of speculation.
"From the river to the sea" was used in that post in the context of Palestinian freedom and peace. Related to that point, I also received another ask concerned with my use of the word "zionist" as it has historically described a very wide range of ideas, and has also been used as an antisemitic dogwhistle. That was not my intent, it's the word I was most familiar with to get across my point that I don't support violence against or the erasure of Palestinian culture. Those using violence and calls for peace to excuse antisemitism are despicable. One can and should be an ally of both Palestinians and Jewish people.
I looked up Standing Together, I can certainly get behind their message of peace and cooperation, and people in Israel who are working to end the genocide deserve so much respect and admiration. It seems like reception to the movement has been mostly positive, but I feel it'd be irresponsible not to mention that the PACBI wing of the BDS movement has taken issue with it in the past week. I don't feel qualified to take a definitive stance either way, especially as I also can't read Hebrew or Arabic to get more direct contex. I encourage anyone interested to learn more and come to your own conclusions.
My overall point is that I do not support the genocide the Israeli miltary is enacting on the Palestinian people. I want to share more posts about Palestinian culture, art, and joy in a time where there is effort being made to erase it.
Finally, while I do my best to make sure what goes on this blog is accurate, I just wanna make it clear that I'm neither an expert at research, nor am I able to be a definitive resource for this topic (or frankly most things).
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Your essay on Joong's underrated acting skills deepened my Joong appreciation so much, that I watched Mafia the Series, I'm watching Ploy's Yearbook (even though there is a serious lack of Joong so far), and I'm planning on watching The Warp Effect too. I haven't watched het shows in over ten years, so this is a big deal! 😂 I really liked him with Dunk in their shows, but MTS gave me another facet of him, because he's so timid in it, unlike in SIMM and HA, where he's (seemingly) very cool and in control. So thank you for making me a full time Joong (and Dunk) girl 💜
i saw this message first thing in the morning when i woke up yesterday and it instantly put me in a good mood!!! <3
YESSSSSS I'M SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT
mafia the series might actually be my absolute fave thai het-show, it's just SO funny!!!! and the entire cast is so great, like, not just joong but the entire cast plays off each other SO well. and don't even get me started on gina virahya and her portrayal of anna kondra!!!!
you know, when i went into mafia the series i saw the poster and was like "ughh i really am gonna have to sit through this standard (overly) dramatic mafia show just for joong, huh. the things i do for my boy..." and then. AND THEN. you can imagine my surprise. i was crying tears of laughter throughout the show and i was actually laughing so hard that my mom made a comment about how she could hear my laugh in my room
beam is my loser boy and joong portrays him in such an adorably awkward way, i love it <333
and yes there IS a serious lack of joong in ploy's yearbook so far :((((
it was quite funny tho bc in the one scene where joong does show up i immediately recognized him by the back of his head, like!! i saw this:
and instantly went "OH there's my boy!!!!!" 😂😂😂
and i can't wait to see him with film bc film did extremely well with gun in not me and i feel like film and joong will also work together really well
you know, i'm always happy to turn people into full time joong (and dunk) girls!!!!!!
i've adored them ever since simm which i watched live from ep2 onwards. fun fact, actually: when i started simm i actually had no idea who they were (even though technically i'd seen dunk in bad buddy already, except i wasn't paying attention to the random high school bandmates and so i didn't actually recognize dunk and only realized later on ahahah)
aaaanyway, i had no idea who they were, right? and so in 2022 my mom and i spent two nights in prague during easter and in the evening we were in our hotel room and we were kinda looking for something to watch. and i was like "hey look, gmmtv has a new bl out and it looks kinda cute and fluffy judging by the thumbnails?? and like something that doesn't require too much brain power?? plus, there's also only two eps out so far, so we'll be caught up right away" and so we watched the first two episodes and then the two of us ended up watching every new ep together every week hahaha
i actually didn't really talk about it on tumblr back then and when you go back on my blog you'll see that there are hardly any simm post. but really, with every new simm episode that aired i liked joongdunk more and more. and especially once the characters started dating i was actually so in awe about just how comfortable joong and dunk were with each other and how they absolutely weren't afraid to touch? like, their physical affection was just so casual, like it was the most natural thing in the world to them in an "i'm-not-even-thinking-about-it-bc-it's-so-normal" kind of way and that was just soooo refreshing to watch?? i was (and still am) truly amazed
and when just a couple of months later, at the end of 2022 gmmtv announced joongdunk were gonna get another show together i got SO excited!! and also when it was revealed that simm was included in our skyy 2!!!!
and then hidden agenda started airing and then i was tagged in that tag game and then i went to watch joong's entire filmography and then i ended up falling into a joongdunk rabbit hole and here we are...
anyway, i have multiple agendas and one of them is turning people into joong fans and dunk fans and joongdunk fans sllksdfd
and my other agenda is getting people to watch mafia the series, bc it's truly a gem of a show!!!!
(speaking of agendas: the only thing that's missing in your message is you telling me that you approve of my fight for a sexy joongdunk vampire bl, like... that would have made the message and the influence of my joong/dunk/joongdunk blogging complete 😂😂😂)
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With all respect and love, I absolutely love your fake dating au. If I had to choose an update between that and the kissing fic (or anything else really) I would always choose the fake dating au. There is so much potential! Please tell me you plan on updating and finishing it? If you’re not, can you at least share with us the fic plans so we can have some closure about it? Would you consider letting another author adopt the gif to finish it if you won’t? It really is a Piarles must-read. I hope I can learn the ending!
but see, anon, you DON'T get to choose. only i get to choose, and i have chosen to update the 2023 kisses fic. 😌
... you know, i debated for a long time if i would even bother answering this ask, or just delete it right off the bat. because in my opinion, this is an incredibly rude, insensitive and entitled thing to send to any writer. it was ONLY A FEW DAYS AGO that i talked publicly about how important it is to remember that writers are humans, too, not machines, and to please treat us like humans. and yet here i am again.
i'm going to answer this one more time, and i'm going to answer it in detail, and then in future if i get any asks in this vein, they WILL be deleted without any interaction. you guys are making me consider turning off anon asks entirely, which i really don't want to do, because the other half of my anons are SO very lovely!! but i also have had enough of waking up to rudeness and blatant entitlement in my inbox.
so. why exactly is it that i think this ask is so entitled and insensitive? didn't the anon say "with all respect and love" and compliment my fic at the start of it?
yes. yes, they did. but the thing is, saying "with all respect and love" doesn't mean you can then proceed to be rude to me and it's all fine. that's like me saying "with all due love and respect, i have decided to delete the fic entirely." the fact that i prefaced it with "love and respect" does not make what i did later alright. (although in this case, it WOULD be alright regardless of whether i prefaced it with "love and respect" or not, since it's MY fic and i can do what i want with it.) this anon, on the other hand - this anon has no right to demand anything of me. i am a fanfic author and i do this for free. it is not my job. i have no obligation to do any of this. which means that nobody out there, really, has any right to demand performance from me. (lmao can you tell i have been deep in the law textbooks lately) but the point stands! i don't owe you anything at all.
yes, you can ask me nicely, and i can choose to reply if i want. (hell, if you ask me nicely, i'd probably LOVE to write things for you!!) but you don't get to DEMAND updates from me. and "tell me you plan on updating and finishing // can you at least share with us the fic plans so we can have some closure" is not asking nicely. that's demanding. YES, anon gave me a compliment and they said "with all respect and love." but they're STILL demanding performance from me, and that's not okay. the anon is making it sound like i owe you "closure" (even though this is a work of fiction, not a break-up you're going through, and i think the word "closure" is a VERY dramatic one to use.)
once again (because apparently i LITERALLY CANNOT emphasise it enough) i do not actually owe you anything. i, katie singsweetmelodies, owe you NOTHING. i do not owe you updates or fic plans or whatever the case may be. i might choose to share them with you, yes, but on my own schedule, since they're MY creations made in MY free time.
right. got that off my chest. gosh. NOW! one other thing that i want to make very, very clear before i end this off - i do not give my permission for anyone to "adopt" my work or to write a continuation of it. i am the one who's put in the hours to write all the setup we have so far. i'm not letting someone else benefit off that. if you so badly want a fake dating fic with the conclusion already ready, then you are more than welcome to put in the hours and create it from scratch yourself. but for someone else to take over my work and take it in a direction i probably won't even like? no. absolutely not. permission emphatically NOT granted.
anon: i'm sorry if you feel that this reply is unnecessarily harsh. but this could not have come at a worse time for me, because i really did talk about the importance of treating writers like people just here, just a day or two ago. needless to say, it really struck a very bad chord with me to get an ask like this right after i took pains to explain, publicly, why these kinds of asks are not okay.
i really am happy that you are enjoying the fake dating fic. and i do appreciate that you tried to tell me that, even though the way you did it was completely out of line. i hope that this answer won't... preclude you from enjoying the fic in the future? or something? i'm not sure, to be honest. the whole thing has left rather a bad taste in my mouth.
but one thing i will say to anyone reading this: i know it's been a long time, but just bear with me. i mean it when i say that there will be an update eventually. no, i can't tell you when. i'm not even going to try and give you a schedule, because like i said, i'm a human and not a writing machine. but the fake dating fic is very close to my heart, and i want to see it finished someday just as much as you do. ❤️
(P.S. - if anyone was very worried reading the first part of this answer: NO, i am not actually going to delete the fake dating fic!!! i was just using a very dramatic example, lmao. the fake dating fic is one of my favourite things i've written, and despite the slight... mess... about its updates recently, that's not going to change anytime soon. 💙)
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