Musings Hvinidyr couldn’t bear to commit to the journal at the bottom of his pack, 1352 DR
The sun, relentless and cruel—it rises.
V rests peacefully, entangled in long grasses perhaps an arm’s breadth away from me, whilst I fight my way out from under thick swathes of stiff tent canvas and the dubiously softer furs of my bedroll. V had warned that my shelter couldn't possibly withstand the night’s breeze; lying once more, or so I'd thought, they’d donned the great airs of a flamboyant haruspex picking through offals as they rifled through their pocket and played at divination. The disorder of its puportedly portent contents were (are) stark: A lone rib-bone signifying victory, or perhaps hubris, depending on the day; a rusted copper that V rarely drew in readings, markings long worn into a comfortable divot through idle fiddling; the button off my old cloak that they stubbornly hung onto, and swore up and down to be a token of good fortune. There was nothing sensible about it, any of it, nor did they earn anything beyond my ire when they prophesised with unearned gravitas that I'd wake smothered by my tent.
I had laughed, though V had laughed louder. I’d been too distracted to hate them for it, then, and now it hardly seems worth the bother.
V’s portrait is ever-striking in the sun. Occasionally I wonder whether I fell for V the first moment I saw them haloed in its light, glowing golden-brown and warmer than anything I'd ever known before. There's God in their face, one of them, at least—I'm not sure which. Lolth is bitter as cheap wine, Eilistraee is saccharin and sanguine both. The Morninglord is—is cliché. Trite. I’d need to unearth the Gods of my parent’s parents’ to read V in their devotionals.
I’d need faith for prayer, too, and I'm too empty for such ridiculous excess. I can only track the steady swell and ebb of their chest as they bleed breath into the air, instead. I do. Devotion weighs on my mind, in my mind, as I trace with my gaze the outline of their face against the dawn and set my heart to hoping they’ll never wake.
They wake regardless, naturally. Laughter’s the first sound off V’s lips, and I wet mine as I hear it, watching them rise and lean over to tug at one corner of my canopy’s corpse.
“Quit moping, Hvini,” V rasps, voice gloriously low and decadent, “I’m always right. One of these days you’ll get used to it.”
“Unlikely. Wasn’t it just yesterday you promised that lady you’d—argh!”
V’s finger had been smoothing over the furrow in my brow, at least until they'd flicked it heartlessly against my forehead; a clear declaration of war. I pounce far before they could even think to—at least physically, I undeniably outmatch them.
Not that it's particularly difficult. V’s hands have never known the callouses of bearing arms, nor do they carry themself with the graces of a duellist. Rather, they flounder, gallivanting through moorland and forest alike with all the grace of a befuddled puppy—easy to roll into a tackle, so long as they're caught off-guard. Taut muscles fit for pack-bearing are useless once my legs are around theirs, hip-on-hip and hand-on-wrist, arms locked fast enough that I'm hardly panting. For an orator, their lung capacity is pathetic. Their flush is... distracting, however.
“Hvin,” comes a breathless little whine from V, pinned firmly underhand, “Hvin, your hair is in my face, it’s ticklish. Let me up!”
Their tone is hard, perhaps, yet their face is anything but—their cheeks curve up and around the smooth crescent of their smile, still smirking at me despite... everything. Shaken, I withdraw enough for them to sit ‘til my weight is settled in their lap. It's a nominal improvement.
“Right. Lovely as your enthusiasm is, maybe we could direct it to packing up your—tent—and getting back on the road?”
“The infamous road you keep promising is always ‘past the next copse’ or ‘a few more minutes downstream’?”
“The very same. The sun waits for no mortal, and my legs are cramping. So, Hvini?”
V’s smile is violence, sweet and unburdened—easy. They're so easy. Mood spoiled, I hiss concern through a sharp exhale, sounding mulish and juvenile and rank. It’s entirely reflexive, mortifyingly so, even, but startled by the reminder of the day ahead and rebuffed only by their saintly amiability, it's hard to care.
“We could stay. We don't have to leave, you don't have to leave.”
“And what would we do, Hvini—Hvinidyr, seriously,” they pin me with their gaze, catching my arm and leaning in with too-sweet concern, "Romp around the wilderness for the rest of our lives? Beg a living off my parents? The Harpers have what I want, and what you need. You deserve better than rotting in a bog with me ‘till we turn old and grey.”
If I need family, I'll find it in you, I don’t say. I’d rather a day loving you than a decade safe.
I am a coward, and V is bright: brighter than the sun, bright enough that it hurts to stare. I am a coward, and so I look away. The sudden hush is a world, and a continent, and an acre between us—stretching far beyond as I fall back from their tenderness. Their hand slides from my wrist to the dew-slick grass, our fingers brushing as they depart.
The little contact sparks a soft coalescence; the quiet narrows and departs until there’s hardly a heartbeat between us unsynched. Mute and still, our silence is 6-foot grave shared by two bodies, each wet breath falling like sodden mud to bury us.
Willful ignorance can’t untether me from time, from the the unspooling day. The carol of morning passes, packing up camp is as trivial as ever, and V refuses to allow me solemnity for long. They set a thankless pace into the dense woad and heather bracketing the forest ahead, carving messy paths through undergrowth as clouds loom above and threaten rain—there’s hardly a moment to catch my breath.
They march us onwards, needlessly chattering all the while. I’m not certain I could carve out more space for introspection even if I wanted to. The shape of V’s deflection feels so drastically different from mine, in moments like this, filled with swift speech and sound and sprinting where we could otherwise walk, but it’s a reprieve all the same. Despite myself, I find myself... grateful for it.
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OKAY OKAY OKAY mm so MASSIVE thanks first of all to @thedomesticanthropologist for their invaluable help editing this it would not be half so readable without their assistance. I am not a writer generally!! But Hvinidyr's plight has gripped me, what can I say </3
This and my previous (first!!) piece of art featuring Hvin and & V marks the beginning of our canonical timeline exploration! All future posts taking place in the canon of Winnie's life will be dated for my sanity because none of this is going to be linear. There's so much yet to write and draw about Hvin's life and how the major events and people in it change him, and I hope I can (continue) to do them justice!!! We'll get to some bg3 events/characters and their interactions with hvin soon, I swear, I am just. having SO much fun with him. Does it show???
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Thinking about Edward Elric as the Amestrian Military's specialest little unfireable boy
State alchemists can be fired for underperforming. We know this up front from the likes of Shou Tucker. And this makes a ton of sense from the homunculi's standpoint since the state alchemists are sacrifice candidates, and the homunculi would want to cull the weakest candidates and focus only on cultivating the strongest ones who stand the best chance of opening the portal.
........Then there's Edward. Who's already opened the portal.
There's no need to cultivate him. No gamble taken on whether he's good enough to open the portal. He passed the final test already. Graduated 4 semesters early.
And as such, has a free pass to do Absolute Fuck All.
And I'm imagining how funny this is from like an outside perspective.
Some newish state alchemist who'd only ever read up on the stories of Edward Elric, ready and excited to start their career of being paid handsomely with endless freedom to research and travel and do anything they want in the pursuit of science... surprised and confused to find themselves put on probation their first month for things like "ignoring orders." Which is, as best they had thought, a famous Edward Elric pastime.
Roy showing a slight bit of stress about his yearly state alchemist report, and Ed just snorting and rolling his eyes at Roy because every year HE just hastily does his on the train ride over (canon in the manga, a travesty it was left out of the anime) and it gets rubber stamped. Ed not realizing that other alchemists' reports get genuinely scrutinized and torn apart while Ed is free to turn in whatever absolute bullshit he thinks of 36 hours ahead of time. One year his report was about whether alchemy could be done via dance (conclusion: no it can't) and no one cared. Roy WANTS to tell Ed there's some kind of unknown favoritism around Ed making him literally bullet-proof but Roy has no way to phrase this that doesn't sound like he's just in denial and mad at how good Ed's train-reports are.
Guy from the Internal Amestrian Affairs sector who's responsible for auditing other internal military personel for any suspicious activity hitting about 1 million red flags for Edward Elric, issuing a STRONG and URGENT recommendation to suspend the alchemist pending further investigation into things like "literal bunk-buddies with two members of the Xingese royalty (enemy nation)" and "spent $10,000,000 of his stipend on a librarian to make her re-copy (what he seemed to interpret as?) military records in some extremely transparent effort to unearth state secrets (it was a recipe book but he was literally asking her about state secrets)" and "literally has never once obeyed an order, ever, not even once in his career, and is on public record having said 'I do not care about the goals and protections of the Amestrian Military. I am in fact only pursuing my own interests several of which are diametrically opposed to the safety and well-being of the governing body of Amestris'"
The issued recommendation is intercepted before it even reaches its intended desk. President Bradley himself has taken issue with it and denies it before a single set of eyes has seen it. The President's veto stamp is a terrifying hammer, used rarely, and it is now sitting on the auditor's desk.
The auditor sleeps with one eye open from then on out.
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