A confession of wishes for a future without you.
Ren sat up from the bed, he couldn't sleep. He's been lying down for hours now, eyes closed even, and yet he still couldn't find his own sleep. Morgana laid beside him, sound asleep. He carefully got up, so as to not disturb him. Making sure to walk quietly in his room while looking for something, anything to help him sleep. A book, a distraction, whatever it is that he can find. So he began his search and not even a minute later, stumbled upon a box. One far too familiar that he froze when he saw it. How many months had it been since he had that box now? He doesn't know, didn't want to keep track of that time, didn't even want to think about anything in regards to it at all.
A small black box with intricate designs painted in red, it wasn't locked, in fact, it can easily be opened. But Ren never did open it. He didn't want to, he didn't want to know what's inside it, didn't want to face the reality that Kaito— that he— that his friend is… He wanted to bathe in the pool of lies he made for himself, that Kaito's sudden disappearance isn't too much of a big deal, that someday, maybe just maybe, he'll come back again. He continued to lie to himself like that, ever since Kaito disappeared.
Perhaps, it's time to face reality once more.
Ren took a deep breath, opening and closing his hand in an effort to steady its trembling, in an effort to gather enough courage to open the box he had been avoiding ever since he first saw it, days after he lost all contact with Kaito. It was hidden underneath the bed, Ren moved it somewhere else, farther from him yet in its own safe place. Just like what he wished and hoped for Kaito as well, far from him yet safe. So he kept wishing, over and over again.
Please be safe, please be safe, please be safe.
That's how wishes work, right? To think it three times, say it thrice, and believe with all your heart for it to be real. So he held onto that hope. No matter how small it was, he held onto it like a precious gem nestled within his palm, threatening to shatter at the slightest jolt.
Ren took a few more deep breaths, until finally, he reached for the box and lifted its lid. In it was a letter, white with a blue ribbon, and a monocle beside it. Ren can feel the gears in his brain coming to a halt, slowly… slowly… it'd freeze in time, but not now, not yet. Mechanically, Ren stood up and walked towards the bed, he sat by the edge, near the window to put an arm on, to lean his body on. For support maybe, for a hope perhaps, that once he's finished reading the letter. Kaito would appear in his white suit with his cape flowing in the wind, the magician in the moonlight.
That's what this is, isn't it? A confession of secrets. He had an idea about it, infamous internationally wanted criminal, Kaito KID was Kaito Kuroba's other identity. He had a feeling that was the case but never pursued the thought, it'd be unfair, won't it? For Ren to intrude into Kaito's secret when he has his own secrets to hide. So it'd just be fair, to not know. To pretend to not know anything. To pretend that the thief he saw on the rooftop that day isn't someone he knows even though he's so painfully aware of it. It's only fair that way.
Ren took another deep breath, swallowing hard as he prepared to open the letter, setting aside the box with the monocle still inside by the window sill.
His heart skips a beat at the sight of his name, written by Kaito's hand.
“Dear Renren,” it starts, “How are you? Knowing you, you probably didn't open this letter until months had passed, I bet! ”
Ren quietly chuckled at that, he was right. Kaito was always too good at reading people. “That's alright though, I won't blame you because I'm such a gentleman,” A small face was drawn there, it looked like Kaito smirking at him, how cute. “I'm sure you've already seen the other item in the box, it was right on top of the letter you're reading now after all! ” He drew a monocle then. Ren held his breath as he read through the next passage.
“What I'm about to tell you, is a confession of a secret! You can't tell anyone about this! This is our own little secret.” A winking Kaito was drawn there, adorable. Ren giggled as he whispered to the wind, to himself, and to the Kaito that wrote the letter.
I promise.
“I'm Kaito KID.” Party poppers were drawn on both sides of that phrase, confetti doodled around it, he really was adorable… “Although… I had a feeling you already knew about this.”
He really was good at reading people.
“It's so anti-climactic doing this on paper too. I wish I could tell you in person instead, I'd love to see your reaction.”
Ren's breath hitched then. His mind slowly drawing a blank, please be safe, please be safe, please be safe. He repeated in his head. Like a chant, a good luck charm, filled with the hope burning his chest, threatening to explode.
“Renren… I know this is kinda cliche but by the time you're reading this, I probably didn't make it after all.”
Ren gripped the paper tightly then, and immediately let go. He shouldn't… ruin Kaito's letter. There was… there was still more to read through… A prank, maybe, a mistake perhaps, please let this be a nightmare he can wake up from. Ren took a deep breath, gathering himself to continue reading once more.
“Hey, Renren, I may not be there while you're reading this but I can tell you're sad right now! Come on, turn that frown upside down! You know I don't like seeing you sad, right…?
…I'm sorry.”
Ren inhaled sharply, pinching the bridge of his nose to stop the urge to cry growing deep inside him, like a dam waiting to burst, a pipe waiting to break, a heart waiting to shatter. It took him a moment to continue reading it.
“I know, I know... there's a lot of questions you want to ask right? And I… I don't think I can answer any of it, after all...
Hey, Renren… How about a magic trick? It'd be hard to pull this off in a letter but here! ” In the next part, four cards were drawn face down, or rather, drawings of four small face down cards were partly glued to the paper, a small tape keeping it shut. “Pick one!”
Ren reached for the second card, carefully peeling off the tape, behind it revealed an 'Ace of Hearts'. Ren bit his lip then, to stop it from trembling.
“Hehehe, You chose the second card, didn't you? And no! Before you start thinking, 'it doesn't matter what card I pick, all of them is the same.' Well, then mister! You can open the other cards to double check it! I assure you that they aren't all the same! ”
And so Ren did. He carefully peeled off the tape from the rest of the cards.
The first card revealed an “I”
The third card revealed a “You”
The fourth card revealed a “Forever”
The last card, was stained with a droplet.
The droplet, was accompanied by another then.
Ren couldn't stop himself anymore. He put the letter on the window sill, slowly, carefully, with a trembling hand, he reached for the box, brought it on top the letter as weight. He reached inside it, for the monocle for him to hold, to steady his trembling hands. Ren sobbed, quietly, soundlessly, he cried in silence so as to not disturb anyone.
“…Ren?”
But that was all in vain at the sound of Morgana's voice.
“Are you… crying?! What happened?! What's wrong?!” Morgana shot upright at the realization, immediately running to Ren's side. Ren couldn't really answer him even if he wanted to, so Morgana looked around for answers. He didn't need to look far.
He stared at the box, at the letter, and at the monocle Ren was clutching. It was enough.
“…Oh.” Morgana's ears drooped and twitched, he didn't quite know what to do, Ren's cries makes his heart ache, he wanted to comfort him but how? Grief isn't so easily comforted. After thinking awhile, Morgana settled upon sitting beside Ren. “I'm… I'm here for you, okay?”
Ren couldn't answer still, but he was grateful for it. Grateful for Morgana, grateful that there's someone there for him while his world was breaking. Kaito was so unfair… selfish…
. . .
Seconds passed, and then minutes, Morgana had found where the tissue box is and moved it near Ren, he had found a water bottle nearby too, placing it just beside the tissue box. Minutes passed, and then hours. The empty trash can that Morgana moved near Ren as well now contained tissues, the water bottle that was once full was nearly empty. And the quiet cries that filled the room turned into quiet sobs.
Morgana rubbed Ren's back with his paw, in hopes of comforting him further. Until finally, Ren calmed down. Enough to take deep breaths to compose himself.
“…Thanks…” He whispered, voice hoarse.
“Mn… How are you feeling now?”
“…Tired.” Ren glanced at the letter.
“Why don't you wait until tomorrow to continue reading it?” Worry was evident in Morgana's voice.
He should, he really should just wait a bit before reading again, that fit of crying made him tired enough to want to sleep already but… He wanted to finish reading it tonight.
Ren gazed out the window, he stared at the sky, as dark as it was that faithful night. He stared at the stars flickering on and off, he remembered the split second he saw the stars reflected in the eyes of that magician as he turned to face them. He stared at the moon, peeking through the buildings, it was a full moon, much like that night. The view of the moon behind a mysterious magician donned in a white suit and top hat with a cape flowing behind him. It was a magical sight that Ren will remember no matter how much time has passed.
Ren took a shaky breath. He reached for the letter, the monocle in the other hand.
“I'm sorry…” Ren's eyes stung, “I deserved to be yelled at right now, you can call me unfair, and selfish, and stupid! You can shout it to the sky, I'll be sure to hear it. But Renren…
Ren. I wanted to tell you how I felt, because I doubt I'd have a chance to say it to you if not now. I'm sorry, maybe I should've told you about it before… this. But then I think, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself for hurting you way more than how you're hurting now, all because of me. Just know that, I love you, and I want the best for you, even if I'm not around you anymore, even if I'm not there anymore. I'll always love you forever and ever! All the times we spent together were the most precious memories I have… Well, had.
Hey, Renren… Promise me you'll find someone else to make you happy, alright? Someone, something, anything! I want you to be happy. You better be looking up at the night sky with a smile! I'll be sure to see it.
I love you, Ren.”
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With the latest bp album dropping today and seeing that nothing has changed the last two years, I’m curious if you can help me understand why I find it all so….mediocre. I can tell that part of it is the effect you’ve brought up with Hybe of too much money smoothing out all character. I also feel like this is a case where keeping the same collaborators has meant doing the same song with tiny changes 5 times, unlike a lot of other groups where they still have variety while keeping a more consistent overall identity. But they feel very bland in a different way than hybe groups do, and I can’t put my finger on why.
nothing blackpink does has a concept.
well, that's mildly facetious: their concepts are 'what if we were cool and influencers and most importantly GIRLS', and that's a non-entity at this point. visually, none of that means anything and all of it is indistinguishable from each other.
i think this is a great question to illustrate exactly why spectacle (the form) is not as simple as slapping together the most bombastic set pieces and ideas you can think of and calling it a day. in order to make good spectacle, you have to put just as much work in as you do with any other type of art. your ideas have to be grounded in a visual logic that drives the entire world you create: sets, costumes, lighting, even text and sound all have to be interlinked, to communicate with each other.
since it's also on everyone's minds right now, let's use nct 127 as an example. specifically, let's use 2 baddies and sticker. both of these mvs superficially carry the same basic visual ideas: there's very bright and highly saturated colouring and a lot of neon, there's a car, and there's a lot of highly decorated costuming. but each of these mvs have highly specific themes and concepts in which they ground both these more general principles.
sticker draws a direct comparative between the old west and the aestheticized neo(n) techno future that has a basis in science fiction and techno orientalism, and within that comparative there's a line drawn between hackers and cowboys, as figures that operate outside of the law on their own moral codes. throwing in the lowrider is another connection to operating outside the law, as lowriders can only be created via modding/customization and the mods themselves are technically illegal. one can pick apart several different meanings from sticker however they desire, but my point is here that the concept has a context and logic. the imagery and production design are all based around that specific theme, and the styling is uses very obvious markers from cowboy/western fashion to further drive the point home.
and 2 baddies. oh there are some LAYERS to 2 baddies. firstly, one of the main visual motifs is geometric art deco style patterning, which is an arts and design movement that started in the mid 1920s and continued up until around the 40s. this movement did not just impact visual arts, but it also heavily impacted commercial and industrial design, which included both architecture (famously, the chrysler building) and, very notably: cars. this era is the boom of the automobile and the art deco movement in particular produced some of THE most beautiful cars of all time, including:
the bugatti aerolithe
the delahaye 177 rs
the delahaye 165 cabriolet
and one of my personal favourites, the phantom corsair
you know who else was designing cars in the 1930s and 40s? porsche:
the porsche type 12, 1931
the porsche 356 no. 1, 1948
and just as an extra fun lil detail, in the chorus of the actual song, there's a sample of a vintage car horn (it's right after the line 'don and manner'), which is the horn of a ford model a, which was ford's second model that replaced the model t, the car that popularized driving. and when was the model a produced?
and like with sticker, the styling draws directly from the clothing associated with concept, as it has very distinctive visual signifiers. we haven't seen any of the stages yet but i'm willing to bet that most of the styling is going to be based around motorsport gear. this goes across the board for pretty much every 127 styling: it is very obvious which era a performance is from just by looking at the costumes, because they use those very distinctive unified visual signifiers.
now, can you do this with a blackpink cb? name me a significant visual difference between any of their mvs. any of their stylings. all their mvs are colour graded the same, they reuse the same general imagery, there's no coherent theme holding anything together, and all their outfits are typical heightened kpop girl group. using just pure bombast works once or twice, but like as we've seen with their music, when you reuse the same imagery over and over again it loses impact. there's no spark. it gets boring.
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