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barcaatthemoon · 5 days

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can you write an alessia x reader fluffy blurb for 23. "This sounds like an interogation." and 68. "When did you become an expert in this”, please? where reader is a guest on the tooney & russo podcast? thank you!

special guest || alessia russo x reader ||

"alright, now it is time to introduce our guest for today's podcast," vic said as all three girls glanced over towards you. you had been sitting in a chair next to alessia, who had been struggling to keep her eyes off of you. the internet knew that you were friends, but not anything more than that. most of her teammates didn't even know how serious the two of you were getting. to them, you were just a fan at emirates who came to see arsenal play a few times.

"ah yes, we have a very special guest today. some of you may have heard about her team being promoted into the wsl, and we wish her the best of luck. more importantly, you have been dubbed the internet's top expert on fish and chips in london, what do you have to say about that?" ella asked. alessia looked so proud of you when your team's promotion was brought up that you had to look away.

"when did you become an expert in this?" alessia asked with a laugh.

"well, my mum and da' do run manchester's best fish and chips stop," you said. alessia fought a losing battle against rolling her eyes. ella smiled as she watched the two of you, being one of the only people who knew how much alessia loved you. "we aren't here to talk about that though, are we?"

"no, i was just curious," alessia teased. you sat back in your seat and crossed your arms over your chest. ella and vic asked you a lot more questions than you had expected. you had sort of hoped to sit there quietly and occasionally chime in whenever alessia asked you to.

"there are several rumors of other wsl teams looking to sign you. are there any that you've been looking towards?" ella asked. this was the last place you wanted to tell alessia your news, so you were quick to divert.

"this sounds like an interrogation, and if so, i'd like my lawyer present," you told her. ella put her hands up at the pointed glare from alessia. "that's not the sort of thing i'm at liberty to talk about, but if my club wants to sell me, i guess i've just got to see who wants me. i'm not much special really, but i'm flattered."

"mate, i've got it on good authority that barca's been knocking your door since the everton days," ella said. she wasn't wrong, but you had your eyes set on a specific club. they had yet to make an offer, and you really didn't want to have to wear blue just to stay in london with alessia.

"tooney, drop it," alessia warned. that was the last of the transfer talk until the cameras had cut and alessia was the one to bring it up to you instead. "you've heard something, haven't you?"

"arsenal is being stubborn and the club won't accept the offer, so it looks like i'll be in blue," you told her. alessia bled red for arsenal, not unlike her england captain, leah, and you could see her face fall immediately. "i can go somewhere else, but the distance..."

"no, you go where you want to. if chelsea is what you want, then i'll support you. just not where anybody else can see." there was a bit of a jovial tone to alessia's voice, one that you appreciated greatly. signing for chelsea had been beating you up for weeks, but it felt like your only chance to stay with alessia and in the wsl.

#answered #woso x reader #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso blurbs #alessia russo imagine #alessia russo x reader

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sad-ocevns · 7 months

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I remember the first time I saw Phoebe, she was on the iPhone commercial, in her old band, Sloppy Jane, playing guitar and singing "gigantic" by Pixies (which I'm also a big fan of). I don't know why but within a few seconds of video I fell in love with her voice and decided to find out more about her. She had an EP and some videos (Chelsea and Georgia if I'm not mistaken. Very different from the versions we have now), covers (Teenage dirtbag with her friend Charlie Hickey. Which was my favorite cover) and small performances on YouTube, and I remember like it was yesterday how difficult it was to find her name, I just found it on a Blogspot that said exactly "if you searched about her because of the iPhone commercial" lol and there were pictures of her with very short hair and leather clothes and a yellow cover EP "killer EP". I remember I took videos on YouTube and downloaded them as mp3 to post on my old Tumblr account. I posted all that I got and when I posted "killer" suddenly an account with the name "phoebebridgers" liked it, and I really don't know if it was her, but given the circumstances where she wasn't famous, I'll keep it in my heart that it was her lol. I'm not a "I knew her before she became famous" person, I just wanted to say how great it is to see a good artist grow so much in music. Since I first heard her I knew she was going to be big in music. No matter how big she is, she is getting the recognition she deserves. The same I say for Julien and Lucy. Julien I met the following year, 2016, and the album "sprained ankle" was one of the best ever. I don't think I've ever identified so much musically with an artist as I did with Julien's songs. She was small and shy, still with few tattoos and now she is gigantic, It's like she was other person, but with the same essence. I know a little less about Lucy because I only got to know her music a little before boygenius, through the song "I don't wanna be funny anymore"... Who wouldn't want to hear a song with such a cool name? It was so fucking good just like all of her songs and I've been a fan ever since . I don't know if the boys will win these Grammys and honestly it doesn't matter, they are bigger than what this award could bring in terms of certification of "good music" (which honestly, no award means something is really good). What they are surpasses all that and, as a fan, I'm already fucking proud of these guys.

#I'm just happy to see more and more people discovering their work #personally I think we all deserve to hear boygenius #boygenius #phoebe bridgers #julien baker #lucy dacus #txt #English is not my language so it definitely contains errors lol #my post

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exitmurderer · 1 month

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Our elaborate plans

I am nowhere near an OG fan. I'm just someone who was in NYC for other reasons in 2015 and thought I'd check out this thing I'd heard of from various diverse quarters. And now it's ending and maybe this was my last weekend there. Maybe not, but as of now this here out-of-towner has no future tickets or flights or hotel rooms booked. So maybe this really was goodbye. If it was, here witnesseth the deponent:

With few exceptions, this weekend for me was about the returning pre-pandemic cast. Steph Crousillat might no longer be bald but her Bald Witch is top-tier trickster ferocity. I looped, I danced, I had my hands and face inspected via sniffing, what more could a foolish mortal ask for?

Turns out, a lot more. For instance, in my first show of the weekend, I'm watching the third-loop party from the mezz. No Bald! Banquo's just kind of circling the party, mostly chatting with Lady Macduff. Soon after, it's clear Steph has been replaced by Jess Smith, who completely shifted gears from distant dreamer Matron to fully IDGAF Bald Witch, what a transformation. Also, happily Steph C. was back on as Bald the next day, so here's hoping that whatever happened in the show wasn't too serious.

The next day, Witch Week continued (Note: Every week is Witch Week) with Chelsea Bonosky on as The Witch Formerly Known As Sexy. Maybe the most aquatically-informed Sexy I've seen in a long time, every movement with grace and flourish as if delivered from the back of one of Neptune's finest dolphins. Also, for a show where everyone talks about the performers' eyeballs, there was some amazing eye work going on there as well, the micro part of the macro, widening and narrowing and rolling. Rolling like the waves. Or maybe that was all in my head.

Lady Macduff was a very important loop and very important 1:1 for me, for reasons that I sure as heck ain't gonna get into out here on the Tumblrs (let alone the Discords and the Tiktoks). I was a wreck (in a good way) when I spent a first loop with Ingrid Kapteyn's furtive/sad/devout/determined/compulsive/maternal Lady Macduff.

Let's say the last show of the weekend was my last show ever. Well, I spent that last loop with Evik Main's Porter, watching that sad/tortured/defiant/funny employee of the world's best fake hotel work magic yet again, whether covered in a sheet or with toast hanging out of their mouth.

I spent a lot of time just saying goodbye to spaces, to props, to various angles and framings of the action--production stills taken by my brain.

There's a lot more, but that's enough. My friends are my estate, as ol' Emily Dickinson wrote, and I have found so very many friends through this show, out on the street and up in the building.

#mckittrick #sleep no more #sleepnomore #sleepnomorenyc #sleep-no-more

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canirove · 2 years

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Red & Blue | Chapter 9

Author's note: A little heads up just in case 😉 Yes, there is a stylist on this chapter. No, she is not inspired on Carlotta in any shape or form. In fact, she is mentioned on a future chapter.

And, as always, thank you for reading and for your nice comments! 💜

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

After our time in Ibiza, is time to go back to work. I trained a few times with Mason, going for a run around the villa where he and his family were staying, and also did some yoga and pilates with the girls. But it wasn’t enough to not get my ass kicked on the first day.

"I don't think I'll be able to walk tomorrow" I say when we make it into the changing room, falling on the bench. "Even my lashes hurt."

"You should get used to the feeling" Leah says, also trying to catch her breath.

"Of my lashes hurting?" I ask.

"Of not being able to walk the day after."

"I don't get it, Leah" I say, struggling to take off my t-shirt.

"I was trying to make a joke about you and your Chelsea boy, but I guess we both are too tired for that."

"You are the worst" I say, hitting her with my t-shirt now that I'm finally free of it.

"Eww, disgusting."

"As if yours smelled any better" I say, laughing.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

Once our pre-season tour is over (this year we went to the United States with the men’s team), it's time to plan the season with my own team. We always get together around this time of the year, making balance of what happened last season, talking about how we can improve it or keep it going, and also discussing new brand deals and opportunities.

"Where do you want to start? Cool jobs or meh ones?" my assistant Eliza asks.

"A mix" I say.

"Ok. Let's start with a cool one. Karlie Kloss has offered to send us some clothes from her new Adidas collection, and she would like to see you wear them on an Instagram post."

"Wait. Karlie Kloss?"

"Yep" Eliza says. "This one is a yes, isn't?"

"Of course it is! You know I've been a fan of hers for years!" Besides football, fashion is my other passion. But I don’t like just the clothes. I also love checking all the campaigns, watching the different fashion shows, and following some of the models’ careers.

We keep going through other offers, some of them really interesting, others not making any sense.

"I've left the most interesting one for last" Eliza says. "Just yesterday I got a call from GQ. They want you on the cover of their December issue, just before the World Cup. You, and Mason Mount."

"Me and who?" I say, almost choking with my drink.

"You are friends, aren't you?"

"Yes, we are. But why us?"

"Because you are the future and present of English football, and that's the idea they have for the issue. Other players will be part of it. I've heard Bukayo and Leah have received an offer. Declan Rice too."

"And they want to do a photoshoot?" I ask.

"Photoshoot and interview. The usual. Maybe some social media content too."

"Of us. Together."

"Yes" Eliza says. "I think it's a great opportunity, you shouldn't say no. And you and Mount have chemistry, I saw you on that video arguing about superheroes. It'll be fun, and it will sell."

"Do you know if his team has said yes?"

"They have."

"Then I guess I can't say no" I sigh.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

(click/tap to enlarge)

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

The photoshoot takes place in Wembley, and a huge team is working with us. I'm having a coffee out on the pitch with Eliza, waiting while everything is being set, when Mason arrives.

"What the fuck are you wearing?" I say, not being able to contain my laugh.

"Why? What’s wrong with it?" he says, looking down at his clothes.

"You look ridiculous" I say, still laughing.

"He looks cool and trendy" a girl says behind him.

"I call it the ugliest tracksuit I've ever seen. And does it have... sequins?" I say, getting closer to him.

"As if your outfit was any better" the girl says again. "Jeans and a white t-shirt? And probably from Zara when you could wear Gucci. I thought you were a star."

"Zoe..." Mason warns her.

"That's what people say. And yes, I'm wearing Zara jeans, super comfy."

"Basic" Zoe says again.

"Comfy" I shrug.

"Why don't we go inside, uh?" Eliza says. "They are probably waiting for us."

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

Once hair and make-up are done, I get changed on my first outfit and go outside into the pitch again. Mason is already there, that girl Zoe nowhere to be found.

"Who was that?" I ask him when we are left alone while the team works on the final touches.

"Zoe, my stylist" he says with a shy smile.

"And what is she doing here?"

"We were allowed to bring someone from our team, and she wanted to come. To get inspired, she said."

"I don't think this is her style seeing what she put you in today" I say with a little laugh.

"It wasn't that bad."

"It was, Mason. It was. I'm still recovering from looking at those shinny crosses the tracksuit had."

"I'll remember to not wear it again if you are around" he says with a smile, the one with the dimple.

"Thank you" I reply. "And sorry if I was rude earlier. I hadn't seen Zoe or even known who she was. I was just making fun of you like we usually do."

"It's fine, don't worry. She'll get over it."

"Ok, guys. We are ready!" the photographer says, making us focus on our job today.

The shoot goes pretty fast despite the constant changes of outfits and locations around the stadium. Mason and I spend most part of the time making jokes, enjoying our time together.

"It's been a pleasure working with you, guys" the photographer says when we are done. "The chemistry between you two is simply amazing."

"Thank you" Mason says. I also mutter something like a thank you, feeling my face getting hot. Why am I blushing? Because he has said there is chemistry between Mason and I? It is not the first time someone mentions it. Though it is the first time a stranger does it.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

I’m back on my own clothes and ready to leave when I see Zoe focused on typing something on her phone.

“Zoe, hey” I say.

“Hello” she says, not lifting her eyes from her phone.

“I just wanted to apologize for what happened earlier. I didn’t know who you were and I was just messing with Mason like I always do.”

“He hasn’t told you about me?” she says, finally looking me in the face.

“He hasn’t, no.”

“Uh” she says. “Cute tho.”

“Cute?”

“Yeah. He wants to keep it private, just for those close to us.”

“I don’t understand” I say.

“Us. Our relationship” she says with a big smile before leaving.

Zoe and Mason? Together? What?

#mason mount #mason mount x reader #mason mount fanfic #mason mount imagine #football imagine #football fanfic

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septembersghost · 1 year

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thinking about the quote from the end of Elvis, "

I’ll tell you what killed him. It was love. His love for all of you.

That voice rang out, and he sang with all his life."

and the reblogged ask about Taylor, and I know people don't want to hear this because we loved interacting with her and miss her, but I'm glad she has distance, im glad she's not killing herself for that love anymore.

i've touched on this a bit in comments with my friend @joons, who wrote really lovely meta about this here, and i'm going to quote her: "elvis, as a man, had such a generous spirit that no one—not his wife or manager or friends or fans—could stop him from digging deep and giving, even when it cost him everything. when his body was failing, his friends would ask him to postpone tours, to rest, to heal. and all he would do is gently smile and say, “it’ll be all right. don’t worry about it.” we may think the colonel is treating love lightly by bringing it up as a factor in elvis’ death, but this pivot in focus actually brings us the closest we ever get to knowing who elvis really was (something elvis himself promised he would reveal to his audience early in the film). his generosity is why he was so loved, and the colonel suggests it was his fatal flaw, that he cared so much about sharing his wealth, his talents, and himself with others that he did not care how much it hurt him. or rather, he did care, but he did not know how to stop sharing whatever he could to make other people happy, instead of attending to his own happiness. he gave people his trust and continued giving it long after they had stopped deserving it. and maybe wishing it had been different would be to wish elvis weren’t elvis."

the movie by default made me think about taylor quite a bit, despite the many clear differences, there are unavoidable similarities when it comes to the types of artists they are, who bare so much of themselves and are constantly giving and shimmering and trying and working to connect to their audiences. it's something taylor has addressed several times now, the rippling whisper of that anxiety and the clear slashed wound of it has been appearing in her work for years, and has crystallized further in her most recent music. i mentioned to chelsea how elvis made me think of dear reader (if it feels like a trap, you're already in one is so "suspicious minds" in the way it was utilized in the film, and never take advice from someone who's falling apart/so i wander through these nights, i prefer hiding in plain sight/my fourth drink in my hand/these desperate prayers of a cursed man/spilling out to you for free/but darling, darling, please/you wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking viscerally made me think of him the first time i heard it after seeing the film). her fears about others seeing right through her, drunk as we watch her shattered edges glisten, that she doesn't do enough, that it's exhausting to root for her, that she desperately has tried her best and wanted to be loved (and make it seem effortless), that she shines so bright but that in itself is a kind of curse, that her desire to succeed is also an irredeemable quality, "your kindness is fake. your pain is manipulative,"...will you still want me when i'm nothing new?...it's splashed like a bloodstain all over her music and is such a sad, distressing facet of what she's gone through, but i also think there's an inherent quality in this that certain artists have - this wellspring of humanity, this boundless love that has nowhere else to go and springs forth from the music, the act of creating art, the euphoric feeling of performing, the intensity of love they feel from fans that, we have to acknowledge, can never be fully balanced or reciprocal because of the necessary and natural boundaries between us. i think taylor gave so much of herself when she was younger that it was corrosive to her person. she was struggling in such a way personally and still striving without end to be respected and embraced, and she gave a lot of that unfailingly to fans, maybe because she felt she had to as an extension of gratitude, maybe because she didn't feel loved and safe elsewhere, and also because she does feel a real sense of love in that way. but i think it was very hard on her too, and untenable. you can never reach everyone. you can never make everyone happy. you can never help everyone who needs help. you can never give all the love you wish you could give. it's a beautiful and admirable and even spiritual thing to share, but when does the line need to be drawn when you have to attend to your own needs and humanity first before collapsing under the weight of it?

all this said, i too am glad she's got a much healthier balance now, is very steadily loved in her daily life by a partner who gives her a sense of stability and quiet, and that she doesn't feel the need to give so much of herself away, outside of all the vulnerability within her art. it doesn't mean she doesn't care for us, i believe she means it whenever she thanks us, whenever she says she owes her career to us or she creates things for fun with us in mind (the easter eggs in the bejeweled video, as a recent example. she took a song about her feeling hurt and unappreciated, sadness became my whole sky, and wanting to sparkle again, and reinterpreted it visually to include her fans as a positive aspect), but i also think she's learned what she doesn't have to sacrifice.

there's an unerring empathy in the tragedy of elvis not knowing when to stop, how sincere that love he had was, how that itself was a type of defiance. "he loved and he gave, and he couldn’t do otherwise no matter how much people tried to stop him. and that simple truth is one last great gift." i do believe this endures and is a connective gift.

still, there's a strength in learning how to stopper that outpouring of oneself, one's heart and soul and love, too, and i do find that i'm thankful she's learned that, even when we miss her engaging as much, knowing she has a better sense of peace takes precedence. that love doesn't have to be fatal anymore. she's learned how to let it have its respite instead.

#anonymous #letterbox #it's like making parallels between she and marilyn too of which there are quite a few even though it's acting vs. musicianship #marilyn also suffered from never being able to turn her intense sensitivity and her love off and the burdens that brought with it #it's really fascinating to me bc it speaks to a certain kind of humanity and a certain need to connect that i think is really raw #anyway i could talk about the elvis comparisons here at length aksdflgk but yeah #i worried about her for so long and she very clearly saw tragedy unfolding ahead of her #she made a conscious decision not to drive off the cliff and that is its own act of bravery #thrown out speeches #taylor swift #elvis presley #i was a dreamer

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alifahzndn · 9 months

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Ooh To Be A Gooner

In many of the decisions I've made in life that I felt were important, it mostly came down to a gut feeling of whether something felt right or wrong.

It's incredible when I look back at how I became an Arsenal fan two decades ago, it was also down to just that — a feeling.

My earliest memory of being an Arsenal fan was when I was 10 years old. I loved hanging out with the boys at school and that very often meant talking about football.

Our school had two sessions, one in the morning and another in the afternoon. We were in the afternoon session at that time. Every day, students in the afternoon session would have to gather at this assembly area in school before we could enter our classes.

It was during this time that the boys would often sit closely in groups and talk about football and have little banters between them about their teams. For me to participate in that conversation, I needed a team.

I didn't know much about football at that time. I didn't know a lot of teams or players, what more the fixtures, rules, or competitions.

I guess playing PES on PlayStation helped a bit but I didn't truly appreciate the game. I just needed a team to join the boys.

I have no memory of how Arsenal was first introduced to me, but I remember thinking that Manchester United and Liverpool felt "overrated" because everyone who spoke about football were supporting either of these two teams at the time. I had one friend who supported Chelsea but I didn't feel the connection.

Arsenal, however, felt right, and so Arsenal became my team.

I didn't know the players, but I heard Thierry Henry and Dennis Bergkamp were legends. My first impression of Arsène Wenger was that he looked a lot like my grandfather.

All that mattered then was that I could be part of the boys' little banter club. It was the boys who would tell me that Arsenal had won or lost a game and what that meant in terms of the club's standing in the league table or cup competition.

Over the years, I became more aware of the team and the game.

Cesc Fàbregas was the first player I became a fan of. I started watching Arsenal games late at night, going through the joys and pains of each game, buying club kits, learning about the league, the cups, the club's history, and cultivating that deep desire to win.

Then there was the unmissable chance of watching Arsenal live on their 2011 Asian tour, and not long after that, the anguish of Cesc leaving for Barcelona.

A few years after that were the 'Wenger Out' years. Those were the hardest. I distanced myself from the club, only checking the scores every now and then.

It wasn't until recently that I started to reconnect with the club again, and with football, in general. Last season was special for Arsenal and the fans, and Super Mik Arteta has done wonders to bring back the love and belief in the club.

For me, this marks another chapter of learning and appreciating football at a more refined and tactical level, and to love and understand Arsenal more meaningfully and deeply.

I've also taken a keen interest in the Arsenal Women's team as they continue to raise the bar in women's football. If I ever have the opportunity to visit Emirates Stadium, I hope to catch the women's team in action.

Like any football fan, I want every success for my club of over 20 years. Looking back, I never expected the game to shape me as a person. Hopefully, all for the better.

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baekhvuns · 1 year

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Omg I'm sorry you had to answer me on your laptop, I don't know why my message is cursed, hopefully this one is normal - BUT WHY CAN'T I LINK SHIT ANYMORE 🔫

Well PSG tried, but didn't not succeed, Bayern defeating more of your faves. Bayern outsold lmaooo. Also Tottenham is out (so sad 🥰), Chelsea is doing something...? Liverpool went insane mode, maybe we shouldn't have mocked them before, I feel bad for MU, but also can't stop laughing at the score. HOWEVER Liverpool better be doing better in PL only, they're playing RM soon and I need them to be shit <3

Premier League has always been more interesting to me than La Liga, but CL is still the most interesting and unpredictable

Fake ass fans, even I know his full name even though I'm a hater https://twitter.com/Kindinzin/status/1633433110657265671?t=rIRz46_drH7z_WfwdcxMoA&s=19 I'm gonna start calling him Ricardo from now on

I think kpop is at its peak of popularity rn, because the amount of random kpop and kpop stans spotting I've had in the past 3 years is crazy! However, kpop is not mainstream at all, sure most people understand what kpop means, may have heard of BTS or BP, but that's about it. And that's fine! Hybe thinks they're the heroes, but they're actually acting like villains, honestly the whole back and forth between both companies is childish as hell, I hate SM, but Hybe is really ruining shit.

Yunho Parisian??? I'm awful cause my first thought was "you should be happy you're leaving Paris, don't cry" https://twitter.com/atzxmxxshx/status/1633617809732419584?t=NHmFuJloyP26WzTNSlOJhw&s=19 btw Paris I blew my Korean friends' minds, they had no idea Paris was that small. It's ridiculous how small it is compared to other big cities in Europe. I haven't eaten spotted dick cause I've been vegetarian for ages before going vegan and even if I still consumed meat you wouldn't catch me eating that shit! I've seen the Jolly x HongSan video, but HJ and his hatred for veggies is so pathetic... is he 10? Maybe that's why he didn't grow

Omg I can imagine Canadians treated you badly when you first arrived :( how old were you?

I'm suddenly more interested in hockey player Hwa! But not as interested as I am in villain Y/N 🥰

DO YOU SEE THE SPRING SUMMER 2023 IN THE 2ND PHOTO?! https://twitter.com/hwaupdates/status/1634105059675107328?t=PxicAWQT-l-xL-U7HrFw6w&s=19 MODEL!

Saikers sounds like Psychos lol, I'm worried about their fandom name now 😬

https://twitter.com/byeonbang_tiny/status/1631929720517574662?t=_6tbRTRi5sEmWHO_oPz7tg&s=19 OP claimed Atz won't last long then said some bullshit to save face. They perform more overseas? No shit, there are so many countries djwjssjjsjdnsnnajss do they want 5 Seoul stops or a whole ass Korean tour?! Plus what about music shows, award shows, festivals... so entitled. And apparently Ktinys are hated by security. Hmmm I wonder why https://twitter.com/allabout_atz/status/1634115890634719234?t=oyCp3k9polmr4pGb89c4Fg&s=19 imo they're not hated enough. Shame I didn't show up with a baseball bat, but I'm in Busan right now. And KQ management is ignoring Korean fans?! 😭 miss you're a weirdo who doesn't respect their privacy, sit down

Finally the tour is over, worst weeks of my life!!! We're safe until they announce another one... apparently they're going to perform in SEA, I can't be mad, cause they're often omitted. They'll probably have a cb as well, which is bad for me, since I should focus on work, but I need to perceive Seonghwa 😭

SICK https://twitter.com/finelineateez/status/1633011361335894021?t=LqLhP52C4_s6MiShNhwAEw&s=19 the binders the pcs came with cost less than $20 so let that sink in 💀

And I took all of these photos https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1633804911778598912?t=JI5pKD-zPWaNdXh-jBSfAA&s=19 - thinking of traveller Hwa fic...

The JK stalker wtf?! Why tf do people like this exist and why aren't they separated from the society

Lmao some of the early lighstick designs were crazy and ugly, but fun. We still have some funny ones now, but there's little to no creativity. I'm still sad the new Lightiny is bald, and not the best quality. And all the white sticks may look neat, but soooooo boring - DV 💖

hello!!!

Omg I'm sorry you had to answer me on your laptop, I don't know why my message is cursed, hopefully this one is normal - BUT WHY CAN'T I LINK SHIT ANYMORE 🔫 /// Well PSG tried, but didn't not succeed, Bayern defeating more of your faves. Bayern outsold lmaooo. Also Tottenham is out (so sad 🥰), Chelsea is doing something…? Liverpool went insane mode, maybe we shouldn't have mocked them before, I feel bad for MU, but also can't stop laughing at the score. HOWEVER Liverpool better be doing better in PL only, they're playing RM soon and I need them to be shit <3

omg no don’t apologize it’s not u iTS TUMBLR 😭😭 ever since tumblr had it’s new update i can’t seem to access certain asks and all so whenever i try to copy paste my answers on the app it just doesn’t post if i don’t do it on the laptop 🔫🔫🔫

i can always count on bayern to absolute demolish my favourites <33 but tbh, idk if u noticed but hasn’t this season’s bayern has been a little weak,,, as in it’s quite easy to get into their heads and defence and borussia is actually on it’s way to win bundesliga 🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ tottenham, are we surprised </3 the memes about the score are so funny 😭😭😭 ten hag waking the players up at 8 in the morning for training LMFAOOOOO what a day i can’t believe how easily they did it???? lIKE WERE MU PLAYING AT ALL?? OOOO UR RIGHT THE RM V LIVAPOOL that’ll be fun to watch, either a disappointment or a surprise fhwjdhjd

Premier League has always been more interesting to me than La Liga, but CL is still the most interesting and unpredictable //// Fake ass fans, even I know his full name even though I'm a hater https://twitter.com/Kindinzin/status/1633433110657265671?t=rIRz46_drH7z_WfwdcxMoA&s=19 I'm gonna start calling him Ricardo from now on

la liga is going downhill, and has been ever since r7 and messi left,,, la liga is full of benzema being a drama queen, PL is so funny they’re just randomly fighting on the field and ligue un….tragic, there is no privacy at that finished club, EVERYTHING IS REVEALED even the shit in the locker rooms 😭😭😭 NAHHHHHH EVEN FAKE FANS KNOW HIS HAME HOW TF THEY GOT RICARDO OUT OF THAT 😭😭😭 i like what the japanese fans call neymar they call him “neymaru!!” 😭😭

UR RIGHT UR RIGHT “However, kpop is not mainstream at all” BUT THIS >>>>>> kpop is still seen as a niche, western artistsjust be trying to expand into the asia market thru them, like anime for japan and kpop for korea and tbh it’s nice like that! with the more kpop fans the worse it gets on twt tbh,, the sm hybe community seems a little too silent these past 4 days i wonder what tf they’re cooking and we know it’ll be something stupid too 😭😭 BUT SM???? DOING THIS???? THATS SO COOL??

LMFAOOOO FBWMFBWMFBEK THE HATRED FOR PARIS FBWMBDKSJCJC yes yunho rich parisian who doesn’t like it there so i guess ur half right 😭😭 no bc how is paris almost the same size as texas 🤨🤨 EVERY TIME I READ SPOTTED DICK I SCREAAAAM 😭😭😭 ok hot take, do u prefer being a vegan or a vegetarian more, in ur humble opinion <3 i told my mom what vegan was and she’s like “so what are u eating??? grass?? no no that’s too much” context we were watching gordon ramsay cook wild rabbit LMFAOOO WHY NOT! EAT THE SPOTTED DICK FOR THE SAKE OF BEING BRITISH DBSNDBMSJCK no seriously how is this guy not eating veggies, like most, if not all the kr food for them so wHATS HIS EXCUSE,, 😯😯😯 ANON 😳 THE WAY I SCREAMED AT THE LAST PART

Omg I can imagine Canadians treated you badly when you first arrived :( how old were you? //// I'm suddenly more interested in hockey player Hwa! But not as interested as I am in villain Y/N 🥰

it be YOUR OWN PEOPLE! NOT EVEN ANYONE ELSE IT WAS JUST BROWN PEOPLE <3 i was 10 when i came here! but u best believe i talked back 🔫🔫 was not gonna let them off the hook 🔫🔫 it was also a change bc i went to an all girls school and then the day i came here and go to class and i see the buffoons 🤚🏻nasty i tell u, nasty

oH YOU ARE NOW??? 🔫🔫 villian yn hehe <3 made the outline fo rit!

DO YOU SEE THE SPRING SUMMER 2023 IN THE 2ND PHOTO?! https://twitter.com/hwaupdates/status/1634105059675107328?t=PxicAWQT-l-xL-U7HrFw6w&s=19 MODEL! //// Saikers sounds like Psychos lol, I'm worried about their fandom name now 😬

THE OUTFIT!!!!! THE OUTFIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE’S A MODEL, it looks like a photo from the 90’s, like looking at an album of ur parents travelling and boom, u see a this,,, oh to be his kids looking at his photos and flexing them 😭 5$ the fandom name is gonna be shakerz 😭😭

https://twitter.com/byeonbang_tiny/status/1631929720517574662?t=_6tbRTRi5sEmWHO_oPz7tg&s=19 OP claimed Atz won't last long then said some bullshit to save face. They perform more overseas? No shit, there are so many countries djwjssjjsjdnsnnajss do they want 5 Seoul stops or a whole ass Korean tour?! Plus what about music shows, award shows, festivals… so entitled. And apparently Ktinys are hated by security. Hmmm I wonder why https://twitter.com/allabout_atz/status/1634115890634719234?t=oyCp3k9polmr4pGb89c4Fg&s=19 imo they're not hated enough. Shame I didn't show up with a baseball bat, but I'm in Busan right now. And KQ management is ignoring Korean fans?! 😭 miss you're a weirdo who doesn't respect their privacy, sit down

omg the security even saying they dislike kr fans???? damnn 😯🤚🏻 no ur right! where will they perform in korea if not seoul??? like im sure there’s multiple stadiums but like they’re usually busy??? and they did like 2 days at seoul 😭😭😭 they live in korea WHY U WANT A KOREA TOUR 😭😭😭 anon, u need to pull up to the airport,, throw hands, do EVERYTHING! if u see them at the seoul concert, u know what to do 🤚🏻OOOOO IN BUSAN?? how’s that going!

Finally the tour is over, worst weeks of my life!!! We're safe until they announce another one… apparently they're going to perform in SEA, I can't be mad, cause they're often omitted. They'll probably have a cb as well, which is bad for me, since I should focus on work, but I need to perceive Seonghwa 😭/// SICK https://twitter.com/finelineateez/status/1633011361335894021?t=LqLhP52C4_s6MiShNhwAEw&s=19 the binders the pcs came with cost less than $20 so let that sink in 💀

LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭 tbh i did not even look at the concert very extensively but just as i was about to, this mf right here🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ sea fans finally getting their share! hopefully fans there are not like the sk ones esp w what happened with nct 😭😭 IM SORRY????? 73$???? HELLO????

And I took all of these photos https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1633804911778598912?t=JI5pKD-zPWaNdXh-jBSfAA&s=19 - thinking of traveller Hwa fic… //// The JK stalker wtf?! Why tf do people like this exist and why aren't they separated from the society

pov : ur going thru model y/n’s photo gallery,, OHHHH U DID NOT JUST BRING REWRITE THE STARS IN THIS, would u mind a model hwa pt2

jk stalker is so scary??? living that close to him and wanting to GO INSIDE OF HIS HOUSE??? oh my god,, id die in embarrassment tbh

do u rmr ikon’s bat 😭😭 a whole weapon,, the new lesserafim light stick looks like a garden light stick 😭😭😭 lightiny going bald was a terrible choice,,, im wondering if the hybe sm thing happens, and if they end up changing their light sicks 😭😭

6 years ago…

we’re, we’re getting the RAUNCHY ROMCOMS BACK 😭😭😭😭 i can’t believe she hasn’t done a full on comedy, this is gold, AND THIS???? we won, we won big time, now we need henry cavill doing a action romcom

anon, what the heck 🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️

the middle one is seonghwa.

#✉️ : ask #dv 💖 anon

0 notes

smmpanel · 2 years

Text

Social Media From the Trenches

On March 18, 2010, Susannah Greenberg organized a panel for the Women's National Book Association on Book Marketing Online. She invited some of the people in book publishing who are engaged in digital marketing, and it made for an interesting discussion. The panel was open to questions throughout and many of the questions kept coming back to social media.

After the panel was over, I realized I had some questions of my own for my fellow panel members which they were gracious enough to answer. Here is my interview with Ron Hogan, Director of E-Marketing Strategy, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, Kate Rados, Director of Digital Initiatives, Chelsea Green Publishing, and Abby Stokes, teacher and author of Is This Thing On?: A Computer Handbook for Late Bloomers, Technophobes, and the Kicking & Screaming

Fauzia Burke: Ron, from a publisher's perspective, you had talked about the importance of having a personal touch when engaging in social media. What does that mean and can you give us an example?

Ron Hogan: People are much more likely to "bond" with other people than they are with a corporation, so as much as possible you should approach and engage them on a personal level. Decades before we had "social media" or even the Internet, Stan Lee understood this, connecting with fans with his monthly "Bullpen Bulletins," a conversationally toned column that gave folks a peek inside the Marvel offices while promoting the newest comics. By introducing readers to the artists responsible for Marvel's comics, Lee cultivated a fan culture that endures to this day.

FB: Kate, you talked about doing "personal PR," why do you think that is important not just for authors but for people in publishing as well?

Kate Rados: Especially in this economy, personal PR is key to any career. Most of your jobs and your relationships (with media, vendors, influencers) come from recommendations and relationship building. Social media is the best place to start making friends within your industry and frankly, that's how people collaborate these days.

FB: Abby, you said you have been active on social media for a year, and I wonder if you had set out with a goal for Facebook and Twitter?

Abby Stokes: I didn't set out with a goal for each medium, but definitely had numbers in my mind at the outset with Twitter. I discovered over time that Twitter followers can be fickle, for good reason, and discovered that the more I posted what was interesting to me and less about self promotion, my numbers increased. By the time that was happening, I was less invested in the numbers and more into the fun of finding interesting things to post. When I stopped thinking about the numbers a slow and steady increase started to happen. I didn't ever think numbers with Facebook, but instead wanted to find people who I hadn't seen or heard from in a long time and had a desire to reconnect with.

FB: Kate, you have been doing social media longer than most people in publishing, what are the biggest lessons you have learned?

KR: Stop selling. Be friendly; be passionate; be genuine. LISTEN.

FB: Ron, do you feel your experience as a blogger helps you with your current publishing job? How?

RH: My background as a blogger definitely comes in handy as an online marketer. One, I have a hands-on understanding of the territory; I haven't read every blog that's out there, but I've been around long enough to find some I admire...and I know effective ways to find more, even in areas I'm unfamiliar with. Two, I've been on the receiving end of marketing pitches long enough that I have a sense of what does and doesn't work when trying to approach bloggers. (I'm not saying my reactions to marketing pitches are universal; I have enough friends in the blogging community who feel differently about various types of pitches than I do to maintain an open perspective.)

FB: Kate, you said you use Twitter to get most of your news, what did you mean and why is it the best way to get news?

KR: It's not necessarily the best way to get news, BUT I use it on a regular basis for two purposes: 1) As I mostly follow publishing people, I hear about the latest news from my tweeps before it hits the mainstream blogs. And, I get people's opinions attached to the news right away, so I can get a temperature of how people are reacting. And 2) I set up lists for my niche blogs so I can get breaking news and re-tweet or add to the conversation. For instance, Chelsea Green is all about sustainable living, so my 'green' list helps me keep in touch with the latest news. And for the record, I still do use Google Reader which in my opinion is the best way to get news--and I use it within an inch of its life.

FB: When I talk to most people about social media they say,"I have no time for it." Abby you said, you have a schedule of 15 minutes in the morning and 15 at night. Did that evolve or did you have that schedule in mind from the start?

AS: I was concerned from the get-go about time management because my schedule is tight. When I teach I don't have access to a computer the same way people do in an office environment. Sometimes I can sneak a peek on my iPhone between appointments or while in transit, but not always. That put a natural limit on when I can communicate. I suspected that if I didn't "water and feed" the people who followed me on both Twitter and Facebook I wouldn't keep them coming back. That's what keeps me disciplined about posting on both twice daily when possible. It is a nice routine now that I catch up and share at the start of the day and at the end Cheap smm panel.

FB: Kate, what are the three sites you can't live without?

KR: Only three?! Regarding social media, I get some good takeaways from Mashable. I also live on Gizmodo and GetGlue. And about 50 others per day. It's a sickness.

FB: Abby, have you achieved your social media goals?

AS: I really enjoy both Twitter and Facebook now. They are a part of my daily routine as much as e-mailing or calling a friend. Not a goal, but a lovely benefit. From a practical point of view, I have increased the number of people who are aware or me--a definite goal achieved. I had no idea that Twitter would be such a wealth of good information--a bonus.

Social media is growing in importance on a daily basis. Both Facebook and Twitter have been real assets to us in broadcasting publicity features, as well as building relationships with authors, publishers, agents, journalists, Web editors and bloggers. I am finding that it is also a great way to show potential clients our results in real time.

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imaginealotofthings · 3 years

Text

Finally being introduced to Andy Samberg...

Your lifelong best friend Melissa Fumero, had invited you as her plus one to the Emmys with her. You were not ready for this - even meeting the cast of 99 is going to be too much to handle never mind all the other stars. This is going to be a day you know you will never forget.

You loved her work and was so proud of her, you could not wait to go and support her for the shows multiple nominations. All of this was so surreal to you - but you were going to embrace the opportunity and enjoy it every moment!

A week before the awards you went, with Melissa to find a dress each and then go for lunch. You gawped at the wide variety of gorgeous dresses, how were you going to pick just one? They were all so beautiful.

Melissa quickly chose her dress, she knew what she was looking for and she found it and looked bloody amazing. It was a simple, stunning, sequinned number; your best friend looked drop dead gorgeous in it.

You scanned the rails - looking for something to jump out at you and something did...

The dress hugged a figure you'd never really let be seen before. And a colour you would never normally wear. You were taking risks and it felt good.

"You look amazing!" Melissa slapped her hand to her mouth. "That is the one!" She clapped behind you like a child while you looked at yourself in the massive floor length mirror. You could not help but smile at how beautiful you looked. You had never been very confident with your body image, but with Melissa's enthusiasm you gained the courage to get the dress and say "fuck it" to your state of mind. A tear escaped your eye - you had never felt like this before about yourself. You had never complimented yourself ever.

"Oh don't get upset Y/N, you know you're beautiful. Even though you don't always see it everybody else does." She hugged you so tight.

You laughed wiping your eyes - "I think I'm in love!" you exclaimed.

It was the night of the Emmys. You had your hair and makeup done with Melissa. You both had a drink and a laugh before your car arrived. You had suddenly become all nervous, tonight wasn't even about you yet you felt so excited.

Stepping a stunning heel onto the carpet you exit out of your car before helping Melissa out. The paparazzi and their cameras were going crazy - what an experience. You tried to hold a smile on your face the whole time, you do not want any bad photos out on the internet to haunt you forever. Posing with Melissa you caught someone looking over to you from the carpet. The majority of the 99 cast must have arrived just before us.

"Hey Melissa!" A voice shouted while an arm waved at us. It was Stephanie Beatriz. You loved her character Rosa in 99. She stood tall in black heels and a stunning navy blue dress.

A huge smile erupted on your face and you waved back, but as your smile grew you noticed someone behind Stephanie's fell and their eyes narrowed.

It was Andy's face as in Andy Samberg. Thee Jake Peralta, thee member of the elite Lonely Island, thee SNL legend. Why did he do that with his face? Why is he so obviously disappointed? When Melissa said she was coming with her friend was he hoping for someone else? someone better? someone prettier?

After this your smile dropped a little. Ignoring what just happened, Melissa introduced you to the wonderful 99 cast. Everyone seemed so lovely. After many hand shakes and hellos from the others. Andy finally stepped towards you.

"Andy, this is Y/N - my girl, I constantly tell you about," he smiles lightly grabbing your hand.

"Y/N this is Andy as you probably already know." Melissa lightly laughs before being distracted by Stephanie and Chelsea. She wandered off giving you a small smile before leaving you alone with him.

He kept your hand in his.

"Y/N, it's so nice to finally meet you. I've heard a lot. Maybe even too much." He laughs a little narrowing his eyes again.

"Nice to meet you too. I'm a huge fan but then again who isn't." You laughed. He still held your hand in his. "And now I feel nervous about how much you may actually know about me because it is kind of worrying how much Melissa knows too." You laugh again looking down at your hands.

"Well I.." Andy began but you cut him off. He finally released your hand.

"I don't know if it's because I've had a few glasses to drink before coming tonight or if it's because I'm feeling really overwhelmed but I need to ask you... about ..why your face dropped when you first saw us tonight." Immediately after speaking you regretted it, as you could see the shock in his eyes. Were you mad?

You felt your eyes widen. Quickly you began , "I am so so.." But he cut you off.

"No Y/N, you're right." Grabbing your hand in his again your heart dropped in your chest.

"Melissa has spoken about you since the first day I started working with her and I've imagined you for years; but today seeing you in person. You've exceeded all of my expectations. I didn't think it was possible for someone so interesting and amazing - to be so breathtakingly beautiful."

He left you speechless. What just happened?

Pulling your hand, he woke you from your daze.

"Sorry if that's too much but I'm done wasting time. I need to start being honest with myself and now you. Come on, lets join the others."

You all sat round a table, laughing, joking, getting to know each other. It was such an amazing atmosphere. Andy was sat beside you the majority of the night. You didn't address what he'd said to you outside but god was it all you could think about. The conversations flowed between you both. You had never been this comfortable witsh someone before besides Melissa and your mom. It was refreshing for a mans company for once.

Tapping your leg, Andy winks at you before speaking. "It's my time to present, wish me luck."

Smiling at him, "as if you need any luck! You will kill it like you always do." You spoke to him as if you'd known him years.

"Good Evening Ladies & Gentleman" Andy began. His presence on stage gripped you from the beginning/ everyone sat quietly watching in awe at their friend up on the stage.

"Thank you for coming and also having me present this award tonight. It is such a privilege. Did you know good things happen at the Emmys? Some of you may be thinking he's not joking around or causing trouble like he usually is. Well, you would be correct." His stage persona faded a little before carrying on.

The real Andy was coming into show. Not like there was a fake Andy but the one about to carry on his speech- you recognised just from the past 6 hours you've spent endlessly talking with him.

"Tonight, hasn't gone as I expected at all. I am going to be honest with you... I came here expecting to have a good night with my friends have a drink, hopefully 99 would win an Emmy and then go home to bed and to my dog. Instead however, I met someone I know so much about - yet nothing about at the same time. I've never been more intrigued by a person in my life" You furrowed your brow not knowing what he was going to follow this up with. "... Guys, I think I finally met my soulmate tonight..." gasps rose from the crowd as they looked back and forth at one another. You turned to face the group but as you did they were already looking at you, every one of them with concern and confusion in their eyes.

He was not talking about you! He couldn't be! He's Andy Samberg for god sakes! He is clearly just joking... right?

"..When you know, you know! Am I right? As I said good things happen at the Emmys! .. now the nominees for the best supporting actor are...

The voice boomed the names of the nominees.

Still in shock you turn back to the group. Every one of them speechless...

I guess good things do happen at the Emmys...

{Credit to owners of images}

{I apologise for bad grammar - written fast}

Thank you for your support

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madeofitzits · 4 years

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In honor of the impending return of Brooklyn 99, here are 99 reasons that...

1. He was precocious enough to know, at 5 years old, that he wanted to change his name (x)

2. He has a bunch of nicknames: Sandy Amberg, Young Sandwich, etc. but the most endearing one is 'Droidy', his family's name for him (x)

3. He is still super close friends with people he's known since: Elementary School (Chelsea Peretti) (x)...

4. Junior High/High School (Kiv and Jorm) (x)

5. … Summer Camp (Irene Neuwirth) (x)

7. ...and Film School (Chester Tam) (x)

8. Before he met Joanna, he dated other famous ladies but - out of respect - he never discussed it/them (x)

9. He loves turtles and tortoises. When he was a kid, he had a pet turtle that he named 'Squirt' because the first time he held it, it peed on him. His Mom, Margie, accidentally killed Squirt when Andy was at Summer camp... (x)

10. … Maybe this is why, when shooting 'Popstar', Andy fell hard for Maximus (Conner 4 Real's turtle). He says they "had a good thing going" and that he wanted to adopt him. In the end, he decided against it because there are a bunch of coyotes in his neighborhood and he was worried the little guy wouldn't be safe. (Popstar: DVD Commentary)

11. Speaking of his Mom, despite being a super private person, he appeared on 'Finding your Roots' so that he could help her track down her birth family (x)

12. When he succeeded he cried (although we never got to see it on camera) (x)

13. That's because, like all good boys, he loves his Mama which is why - as part of the same episode - he said "My mom is basically the kindest person I know… and many people would corroborate that" (x)

14. Andy's Sisters, Hannie (Johanna) and Darrow, used to make him wear diapers and put his hair in pigtails until he was 5 years old. He says he didn't mind because he just liked that they were paying attention to him (x)

15. That's why he sees his identity in comedy as being 'America's kid brother'. When he was young, he would annoy his sisters until they laughed and he claims to have been replicating that approach to entertainment ever since

16. Although a bunch of his characters have 'Daddy Issues', Andy definitely doesn't. He's super close with his Papa (Joe) and has said "he's a good man" and "the best Dad in the world" (x)

17. Joe was Andy's youth soccer coach and in one scene in 'Hot Rod', Joe's favorite photograph can be seen in the background. It shows a very young Andy posing with a soccer ball, after "scoring the winning goal against Mersey" (x)

18. He's been a loyal Golden State Warriors fan since he was a little kid, living in Oakland (then Berkeley) and, in 2010, he correctly predicted that they would "win a Championship in my lifetime" (x)

19. The proceeds from his Umami Burger ('The Samburger') went to a deafness early detection program in Berkeley. This cause is close to his heart because Margie uses hearing aids and used to work in the special needs program, teaching deaf kids (x)

20. He, Kiv, and Jorm have made multiple donations to their old school district, including $250 000 to its theater program (x)

21. On the subject of The Lonely Island; Andy always goes out of his way to make sure that everyone knows how much he owes to his buddies. For instance, he told Marc Maron, during his WTF appearance, that "I get a lot of credit for what Kiv and Jorm have done" (x)

22. He makes this face when he knows he’s said something naughty…

(Gif credit: @andrewsambags)

23. During his 'Wild Horses' appearance, he said that he can't watch scary movies because they freak him out too much. He told 'Complex' that he's still scared of 'The Shining' (x)...

24. … Similarly, when he was at UC Santa Cruz he worked at the Del Mar movie theater and he had a hard time coping with screenings of 'Species 2' (x)

25. He fell in love with Joanna, the moment he met her, when she greeted him by addressing him as 'Steve the C**t' (x)

26. He listened to 'Ys', everyday for a year, before he and Joanna started dating (x)

27. He bought the original portrait that was used as the basis of the cover art for 'Ys' and gave it to Joanna as a Christmas present, so that she could hang it in her music room (x)

28. He loves birds and goes hiking and birding with Joanna (x)

29. Every new comment he makes about Joanna becomes an instant contender for 'most beautiful thing a person has ever said about their spouse' (x)

30. For example, he readily admits that Jake's iconic heart eyes are the result of him thinking about his amazing wife (x)

31. There are many stories about how incredibly romantic Andy and Joanna's wedding was and Jorm has said that it featured "the most magical vows I've ever heard" (x)

32. The Newsombergs now live in Charlie Chaplin's old house (x)

33. On the Emmys Red Carpet (2015), the year he hosted, they took a momentary break from posing for the world's press to whisper 'I love you' to each other (x)

34. At last year's Vanity Fair party, Andy carried Joanna's purse for her so she could grab a snack (x)

35. He was a semi-permanent fixture in the audience for her recent run of shows for the 'Strings/Keys Incident' tour, even officially confirming his status as the 'President of her Fan Club' (x)

36. He used his Golden Globes monologue to call out the government for framing and murdering the Black Panthers (x)

37. On the Carpet for the Guy's Choice Awards, he called the event "a ridiculous farce", adding that "men already have it so easy - it's insane that there's a show that celebrates them". That makes sense when you consider that he, Kiv and Jorm have made an entire career out of parodying toxic masculinity (x)

38. He once said that only "idiot-ass men" think that women aren't funny (x)

39. He’s been wearing glasses since 7th Grade and he has the most heartbreakingly cute habit of nudging them up his nose, (especially when he wears his Sol Moscot frames) (x)...

40. ... and of rubbing his eyes under them (x)

41. He barely ever wears glasses for roles but he also avoids contacts (because he doesn't like touching his eyeballs) which means he's almost always 'acting blind' (x)

42. He has worn his glasses in character a few times - as 'himself' ('Lady Dynamite'), as 'Paul' ('I Think You Should Leave') and during a very small number of SNL sketches (e.g. during his one appearance in a 'Gilly' with Kristen Wiig) (x)

43. He can't tolerate glare and when that makes him squint it's a sight that's too cute for words (x)

44. He owns about six outfits and has been rotating them for well over a decade (x)

45. He barely ever breaks during shooting/while performing, so when he does it's aggressively adorable. (x), (x)

46. He's a grown ass man who persuades people to come with him to the bathroom because if he goes by himself he'll get lonely (x)

47. He didn't announce he was leaving SNL, until after his last appearance, selflessly choosing not to detract from Kirsten Wiig's huge and emotional send-off (x)

48. He undertook a quest to smell like Lorne Michaels (x)

49. He's ageing like a fine wine (x)

50. To protect their daughter's privacy, Andy and Joanna never announced that they were expecting. They've never released their little girl's name or date of birth and most news outlets still report that they became parents in August 2017 (even though that's inaccurate) (x)

51. Although he's careful not to talk about his daughter often, sometimes he can't keep from gushing about her. For example, when asked about his first year of fatherhood he said: "It’s been the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Just like a beautiful, incredible dream. It has surpassed every expectation I ever had. It’s definitely been very blissful" (x)

52. After their daughter was born, Andy and Joanna spent the first 40 days at home with her (in a practice known as 'confinement'). He's described it as being "a really special time". (x)

53. Andy is famously mild-mannered but, when asked about what triggers his 'Dad claws', he admitted that if anyone attempted to touch his daughter, without permission, he'd "probably sock them hard in the face"…

54. ...Characteristically, he went on to add that he hopes that never happens, since he hasn't been in a fight since 6th Grade (x)

55. Cyndi Lauper was his first celebrity crush and he plays her record ('She's so unusual') for his daughter all the time. (x)

56. His is the very definition of a precious laugh (x)...

57. It's made even more wonderful by the way it makes his voice go high-pitched (x)

58. … and the way it causes his eyebrow to rise involuntarily

59. It's impossible not to smile at his impression of his Mom (x)

60. And laugh at his impression of John Mulaney (x)

61. He was so convinced he wouldn't win the Golden Globe for Best Actor in a Comedy or Musical, that he didn't prepare a speech. Instead, as he explained to David Letterman, he "just went… and started drinking". The resulting list of improvised 'thank yous' was perfect in every way (x)

62. As producers, Andy, Kiv and Jorm have given life to some amazing projects ('Alone Together', 'Brigsby Bear', 'I Think You Should Leave')...

63. … and gone out of their way to support women in comedy ('Party Over Here', 'PEN15') (x)

64. As well as being a comedy legend, he's a super-talented dramatic actor, who gave the performance of a lifetime in 'Celeste and Jesse Forever' but, after the movie wrapped, and it was time to do press for it, he was straight back to goofing around (x)

65. His lip bite should be illegal (x)

66. Even though he wears the same vanishingly small number of outfits, over and over, he has a vast collection of the most excellent socks (x)

67. He always gives 'editing notes' during his own interviews (x)

68. He has a super sweet and sincere way of thanking interviewers when they compliment him (x)

69. He adjusts his hoodie constantly (x)

70. The two most perfect Jake laughs in b99 are actually real Andy laughs 'https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=W38A_xuXaeg https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sVm9nYrTWRQ

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71. Virtually everyone who has ever worked with Andy has talked about what a wonderful person he is. This explains why so many of them have been involved with more than one of his projects (x)

72. It's not only his colleagues who talk about what a delight he is (x), (x)

73. This lovestruck fool wore his own wife's merch when he went out to dinner (x)

74. No one else uses the word 'dinky' quite like Andy (x). The same goes for 'snacky' (see point 70)

75. He does this with his tongue (x)

76. He still likes to play soccer but his eyesight is so bad that he has to keep his glasses on for it

77. When he lets his gorgeous floofy hair grow a little it sits perfectly over the arms of his glasses (x)

78. He gifted the world with Jakey's little curl (x)

79. At the James Franco Roast, he couldn't bring himself to be mean to anyone except himself (and Jeff Ross, a little!) (x)

80. In fact, he's always been willing to laugh at himself (x) and he still is (x)

81. He changes b99 scripts to make them more feminist (x)

82. Despite their humble insistence that they just benefited from 'good timing', the reality is that Andy, Kiv and Jorm (along with Chris Parnell) revolutionized digital media, when 'Lazy Sunday' popularized YouTube, increasing its traffic by 85% overnight (x)

83. He once attended the Vanity Fair party because his Mom told him to (x)

84. He has an amazing way of subtly but firmly shutting down inappropriate questions, like when this interviewer suggested that Holt being gay was something that could have been played for laughs https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=idQsYQfkR5o

85. He auditioned for SNL at the same time as Bill Hader. Hader thought he'd blown it because Andy had a bunch of props and Bill had none. In the meantime, Andy thought he'd blown it when he saw Hader and realized 'this guy doesn't need any props' (x)

86. His bromance with Seth Meyers is one for the ages (x)

87. Every single second of this video is proof of why Andy, Kiv and Jorm deserve the world (x)

88. He once dragged Mulaney up on stage for SNL Goodnights, even though writers weren't allowed to join in (x)

89. He has a hilarious phobia of pooping anywhere except his own bathroom (x)

90. His beautiful, beautiful, face: His smile (radiant), his eyes (caramel - hella disarming), his ears (adorably asymmetrical), his nose (perfect), His chin (the dimple… *swoon*), his jaw (could cut glass), The 'Sambeard' (another amazing layer of pretty) (x)

91. His body: His butt (x), his thighs, (x) his soft lil tummy (The ‘Sambelly’) (x), his hands. (x), his arms (x), his hips…

(Gif credit: @amystiago /@badpostandy on Twitter)

92. All signs point to the fact that, like Jake, Andy uses his glasses case as a wallet (x)

93. Jake's "cool-cool-cool-cool-cool-cool" is an irl Andy-ism that the writers worked into b99 scripts. What's even better is that Joanna does it, too (x)

94. He has a really good arm and is low key competitive, which is super hot https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=e32K_nBDy3Q

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95. He's one half of the cutest Red Carpet pose of all time (x)

96. He barely ever seems to get mad but if angry Jake is anything to go by, maybe he should... (x)

97. He's a huge nerd, who geeks out over GOT, LOTR, 'Star Wars', 'Alien(s)' and anything relating to time travel (x), (x)

98. He has a gorgeous speaking voice, especially when he’s tired or a little sick. (Bonus points for any time he uses the word ‘correct’. See point 30) (x)

99. He’s still so committed to his b99 fans and fam, even after all this time and is as excited as the rest of us that...

#99 reasons to love #andy samberg #brooklyn nine nine #b99 #a masterpost for the best boy there is

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