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yumeyooa · 3 years

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revenge is brutally sweet | jeon jungkook

—jeon jungkook’s life so far has been going well. he’s the guitarist of the most famous band in the scene, he’s got the girl of his dreams, and everything he’s ever wished for is in the palm of his hands. what he doesn’t expect though, is to wake up one day in the middle of a controversy. what the controversy is, you may ask? a new band has been hitting the charts, and their lead singer is none other than you, a former member of the band and his ex-girlfriend.

➢ pairing: jeon jungkook x female! reader

➢ word count: 14.6k+

➢ love letter: AH SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG T_T I kinda drowned in midterms AHSHSHs but I hope you enjoy this fic <33 there’s more to this angsty collection to come so stay tuned!!

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Life couldn’t be any better.

This is what Jeon Jungkook constantly told himself every morning after his short, fifteen-minute shower while messily tousling his hair in an extra-soft towel as he takes in the dreary yet somehow vibrant view from his penthouse apartment, soaking in the sun’s rays.

The city was busy, even though the sun had just risen and bloomed into full glory. The streets were filled with people rushing to get wherever they needed to be, cars driving past with the fervor of a shackled mad man on wheels. If Jungkook looked closer, he would have probably seen the black exhaust drifting in the air from the fumes of those ecologically damaging vehicles or the frantic looks on an office worker’s face as they hurriedly crossed the street obviously late for work.

But alas, Jungkook couldn’t care less about the trials and tribulations of some strangers he didn’t even know. After all, his life was going great. In fact, he was literally walking on cloud nine at this point and felt like nothing had stopped him.

Of course, it wasn’t always this way, which was why Jungkook appreciated his success tenfold.

He, like every other success story, had started from the ground up. Music was something he had always dreamed of doing for the rest of his life. Ever since his grandfather had first shown him how to play the guitar, the melodies had wrapped their whimsical tunes around his heart and made themselves stay. It was fascinating to him how playing a couple of strings could produce such music that could move souls and bring smiles to people’s faces.

And ever since then, he was hooked. Every chance he got, he would play the guitar even if his parents tried to pry him off it.

They wanted him to be a doctor after all, and there was no way in hell he was going to go by their wishes. While being a doctor was great, it didn’t ignite the same spark that music did, and for Jungkook, he would rather die than live a life without his flame running ablaze.

So, against his parent’s wishes, he pursued a career in music. It wasn’t easy, of course. At first, he had no support system for his dream. His friends and teachers ridiculed and discouraged him, saying that the future was bleak and he had no hopes of making it big. But if Jungkook knew anything about himself, it would most likely have to do with the fact that he was extremely stubborn and persistent, much to the disappointment of the adults in his life.

So he continued. He continued reaching his dreams, joining every music-related activity he could at his age until he finally met Mr. Park.

Mr. Park was a bright man who came in one day as a replacement for their music teacher, who was an old lady who stuck to the classics and had a somewhat deceiving grading system. He came into class with disheveled hair, an unkempt tie, and when he turned around to write his name on the board, the whole class laughed as they could see his heart print underpants peeking through.

But despite his clumsiness and seemingly carefree nature, Mr. Park was a master at his craft. He was the epitome of what a music teacher should be; exceptionally skilled, eloquent, and passionate about what he did. But Mr. Park had another talent that not many knew about, which was the eye for potential.

And Mr. Park saw potential in Jungkook.

He had taken Jungkook under his wing and taught him the ropes of music life. The keys of the piano, how notes were read, how symphonies were made. And the more Jungkook learned, the more he yearned for a life surrounding music. When he voiced his wishes to Mr. Park, expecting to receive the same rejection he had always known, he was pleasantly surprised to find out that he had his support.

Mr. Park was the very first person who saw that Jungkook could have a future in music. He was the very first person who showed Jungkook that there was a path for him to take that was far better than the path his parents laid out for him. A rocky path filled with trials and tribulations but ultimately reaped great rewards in the end.

Like a moth drawn to its flame, Jungkook was attracted to the seemingly devastating path because somehow, amid the darkness, there was hope. Hope for a happier future, a future that wasn’t filled with regret and mourning but full of triumph and satisfaction. Jungkook would be a fool not to pursue the latter.

And thus, in hopes of finally seeing the light, Jungkook decided to start his own band.

It didn’t start off right away, though. After all, no kid at his school wanted to be part of a band that, in the eyes of their parents, was a complete waste of time. Jungkook kept his small dream hidden deep within his heart, yet even so, it still burned with an unyielding passion. Even if years passed and no opportunity for him to start a band was in sight, Jungkook didn’t give up, knowing that his persistence would one day reap great rewards.

And finally, his chance came in the form of you.

From the very beginning, Jungkook had always thought you were strange. In a prestigious school known for being the epitome of perfection and class, you were the odd one out, sticking out like a sore thumb with your disheveled appearance and undignified manner of carrying yourself. Almost immediately, you were set to be the outcast, ridiculed by your peers for your looks and mannerisms, even if, in Jungkook’s opinion, you weren’t doing anything out of the ordinary.

Unfortunately, the world is never kind to those who are different.

Jungkook’s phone rings from where it is laid on his bedside table, the alarm blaring loudly, causing a shift in the once serene atmosphere of his apartment. Jungkook pays it no mind at first, choosing to finish drying his hair before finally picking up the phone, voice groggy and slightly annoyed from having his peaceful morning interrupted.

“Who is it?” He hastily asks, not meaning to sound as harsh. But could he really be blamed when it was 7 AM in the morning, and he wasn’t expected to show up to any scheduled event until noon?

“Jungkook!” An exasperated voice exclaims from the other side of his phone. It was Namjoon, his manager, Jungkook, quickly concludes. Although it was rare for him to call so early in the morning, especially in such a panicked state. Perhaps he forgot to inform him of a schedule? Although that was annoying, Jungkook wouldn’t really mind. After all, work made money. But if that were the case, it would have been odd for Namjoon to be so panicked about it. The man was known for being reasonably level-headed even in times of extreme stress, so perhaps it was something else entirely.

“Did you read the news?” Namjoon quickly adds before Jungkook could ask what was wrong. At his question, Jungkook’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, quickly sitting down on the side of his bed and grabbing his iPad from the same bedside desk, unplugging the charger along the way.

“No,” he says as he types up the password into the Home Screen, laying his phone in between the juncture of his shoulder and ear. “Is there something I should be concerned about? I mean, it’s not like I got into a scandal or anything, right?”

Wrong.

Well, partly.

The moment Jungkook opens his Twitter, he’s surprised to see more notifications than usual. Of course, it was a given for him to have a ghastly amount of notifications as a celebrity. He did have a large fan base, after all. But the numbers on his screen far exceeded that of what he was used to, and amongst those notifications tagging his account, one article stood out amongst the rest, and the headline made his blood run cold.

“What the fuck?” He whispers, staring at the article in shock as if he couldn’t believe his eyes. “Am I seeing this right, Namjoon?”

The man on the other side of the phone is silent for a while before Jungkook hears a sigh. “Unfortunately, yes,” Namjoon says, and Jungkook can almost imagine the way he’s probably rubbing his temples together while sipping his cup of black coffee in his office out of stress and frustration

“(Y/N) is back,” he says, causing shivers to run down Jungkook’s spine. “And apparently Jungkook, she wrote a song about you.”

The day Jungkook finally mustered up the courage to talk to you for the first time was an experience, to say the least. For what felt like years, albeit it was only a few days, Jungkook had been observing you from the sidelines, watching as you were berated by his classmates, who apparently had nothing better to do with their time.

A part of Jungkook always felt guilty for never standing up for you. He knew you needed a friend. Someone to confide in this hellish school that made it seem as if it were every man for himself. But he was a coward, raised and molded to never take a step outside the boundaries he had set for himself, like a doll.

Although, with Mr. Park's influence, Jungkook could finally break free from his shell, even if it were just a mere few steps.

"Here," he says nervously, handing you a carton of banana milk that he had picked up from the nearest vending machine the moment he saw you storm out of the classroom in tears. Even then, your classmates had laughed, mocking how sensitive you were, which disgusted Jungkook. Didn't they have any ounce of shame for making a person cry like that?

You look up from where you sat on the school's staircase, eyes puffy from crying so hard, a stream of tears still flowing down your face. You looked like an absolute mess, and the sight only caused Jungkook's heart to clench even more. He sat beside you, albeit a bit distanced because he couldn't help but feel awkward. This was your first conversation, after all.

You stare at him, not entirely understanding why he would extend kindness towards you. Was this a trick of fate? Was he doing this so you would someday do his bidding in the future? The kids of this school were scary, even scarier than the monsters that hid underneath your bed or the creatures that roamed around in the dead of night. Even amidst the light, they scared you, and you were terrified that the man offering you some banana milk would be just the same.

"You don't have to take it if you don't want to," Jungkook says, after realizing you were staring at him warily, cautious over whether or not you would accept his gift. "Sweets always cheered me up whenever I feel down, and I thought maybe it would cheer you up too!"

If anyone were to see your interaction, they would have burst out laughing from how awkward it was. You who were wary and cautious, and Jungkook who was awkward and shy. A stark difference between your usual timid behavior and Jungkook's confident act. In fact, if anyone else were to see this, they would have never believed their eyes.

It was odd, after all. And you knew this very well. Which was why you were so confused at Jungkook's behavior. Why was he approaching you so kindly when everyone else ridiculed and shunned you out? You were different, someone who didn't deserve to be there. An imposter, an intruder. It didn't make sense for him to act friendly.

"Don't take this the wrong way," Jungkook continues, setting down the banana milk in the space between the two of you as he fiddled with his fingers, a habit he had picked up over time. "I'm not doing this to mock you or make fun of you later down the line… I just really don't like the way they're treating you. It's not right."

You're stunned. Rightfully so. This was the first time someone had ever gone against what others did to you, despite him doing so behind the scenes. A weird sensation bubbles up from inside you, one you can't quite place. But what you do know is that amidst it all, there's warmth. Jungkook's words sounded genuine and sincere, not like the usual condescending tone you were used to hearing from the rest of your peers.

He genuinely seemed to care.

Jungkook's eyes widen in surprise when he sees you grab the carton of banana milk, opening the straw in pushing it through, taking a sip. You sheepishly stare down, not even bothering to look Jungkook in the eye before muttering. "I prefer strawberry milk… but this isn't that bad... I guess… Thanks…"

His eyes gleam, happy that you've accepted his offering and watching with a content smile as a small smile of your own forms on your lips, a far cry from the mess you were mere moments ago. He had somehow managed to cheer you up, and that was better than anything Jungkook could ever ask for.

"No problem. Next time I'll buy you a whole box of strawberry milk!" He exclaims, excited for what was about to unfold between the two of you.

But he would have never expected this.

And on this week's celebrity news: Former Vocalist of The 97, (L/N) (Y/N) debuts solo with her new single 'Move On', which fans speculate is a direct message to her ex-boyfriend and former bandmate Jeon Jungkook.

"Fuck!" Jungkook exclaims, overcome with emotion, as he watches the news unfold in the conference room of his label. He had quickly made his way over the moment he saw the headline, confused, devastated, and most of all angry.

What in the world were you thinking, dragging him down like that?

"Jungkook, calm down," Namjoon says from the other side of the room, trying to prevent Jungkook from destroying the room. Jungkook was strong. And if he really wanted to, he could turn the whole conference room upside down in a blink of an eye, and Namjoon really didn't want to deal with whatever consequence would follow should Jungkook actually decide that he'd destroy the conference room.

"How the fuck do you expect me to be calm, Namjoon?" Jungkook asks, exasperated as he walks from one end of the room to the other. "This is going to ruin my fucking reputation. And it's all because that bitch is too bitter about our breakup that she decided to fucking write a song about it."

"Hey." Another voice calls out, stern and ready to scold. Jaehyun, the band's bassist, glares at Jungkook with as much disdain as he could muster, not believing the words that came out of Jungkook's mouth. "No matter how you feel about the situation. I'm not going to stand by and let you call (Y/N) a bitch. She was and still is our friend. Just because you're so caught up in your perfect reputation doesn't mean you have to bring others down in the process, Jeon."

It was rare for Jaehyun to ever call Jungkook by his last name. The two were as close as could be, having been the best of friends for more than ten years and counting. Jungkook knew he could trust Jaehyun with his life and vice versa, so it shocked him to hear that his best friend was defending her.

"But Jungkook has every reason to be mad, Jaehyun!" Another voice pops up, this time a more feminine one that has Jungkook's heart-melting just a bit. Eunha, his current girlfriend, and the one who was there for him when you left him. She was the band's current vocalist, and Jungkook couldn't feel any more grateful to have someone as supportive as her in his life.

"She's using a personal situation to make her more popular, all the while bringing us down in the process! There's nothing else to call her but a bitch when she's hurting the band she started with! Is that how she says thank you when the band's been nothing but good to her?

It's incredible, Jungkook thinks to himself, how he was able to find someone like Eunha. She was the most compassionate and understanding person in the world, a far cry from what you had become. Bitter, selfish, and downright ungrateful. You probably wrote that song out of spite just to get back at him when he did nothing wrong in the first place. You were crazy, and he was glad Eunha allowed him to see through all of your lies.

"Shut the fuck up, will you?" Jungkook's eyes darted in surprise to Yugyeom, the band's drummer, who had just cursed at his girlfriend. He glares at the drummer, mad at the fact that the usual happy-go-lucky man was now acting bitter in front of his girlfriend, who had done nothing wrong. Were his bandmates woven that deep within your cruel lies?

"Excuse me, what did you just say?" Eunha asks, appalled, tears forming from the corners of her eyes, which only causes the anger within Jungkook to grow. How dare they. How dare they make Eunha cry when she was doing nothing but telling the truth?

"You heard me, Eunha," Yugyeom continues, paying no mind to the burning rage that was about to burst within Jungkook. "I said shut the fuck up. So what if (Y/N) wrote a song about Jungkook? Why does it matter? She has every right to. I mean, our next single is literally a song Jungkook wrote after the breakup, so why the fuck are you berating her for doing the same?"

"Because she's hurting our reputation!" Eunha exclaims, clearly frustrated at how Yugyeom and Jaehyun weren't getting her point. "And besides, she was the one in the wrong during the breakup. What right does she have to make a song about it?"

Jaehyun scoffs, glare intensifying, causing Jungkook to clench his fist at their hostility. "And how do you know that when you only heard Jungkook's side of the story and not (Y/N) 's? For all we know, Jungkook could also be in the wro—"

Before Jaehyun could finish his sentence, Jungkook explodes, immediately rushing over to where Jaehyun sat and grabbing him by the collar, causing the rest of the band and Namjoon to panic, trying to break them apart, while Eunha watches, scared.

"You motherfucker," Jungkook curses, hand raised into a fist, ready to punch Jaehyun in the face with all the force he could muster. But before he could do so, Namjoon and Yugyeom immediately held him back, causing Jaehyun to let out shaky breaths as he glared at Jungkook, hurt, confused, and angry. "Why are you defending her? She was the one who hurt me! You're supposed to be my fucking best friend!"

"Maybe if you actually listened to what she had to say and what she was going through, then we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place," Jaehyun screamed back, anger slowly growing as each moment passed by. "You've always been like this Jungkook, self-centered and fucking mean. (Y/N) was right for wanting to leave."

"What did you say, you fucki—"

"Enough!" Namjoon screams, holding his ground. This had gotten out of hand, and it was beginning to stress him out, and clearly, that same stress was spreading through every single person in the room. This wasn't even supposed to be that big of a deal. All they were supposed to do was listen to the song you wrote, and come up with a statement, So why the hell did this turn into a full-blown fight?

Gosh, Namjoon needed a raise.

"Jeon Jungkook calm the fuck down, or I'll have you on probation, you hear? The same goes for all of you. I don't want to hear any bullshit about who's right or wrong in the relationship. All I need is for us to listen to the song and figure out what we're going to tell the higher-ups. So stop acting like you're a bunch of teenagers and sit down."

Usually, Namjoon wasn't this scary. But there was a glint in his eyes that taunted the band. And they knew that in the heat of the moment, the best thing to do was to shut up and listen. Besides, he was right. The way they were going, no progress would have been made, leading to further complications. With a huff, Jungkook sits down, staring grumpily into space. He wasn't comfortable with what had just occurred, a frenzy of emotions bottling up inside him from the outburst.

Luckily for him, Eunha was quick to hold his hand into hers, soothing him enough to calm his nerves and mentally prepare himself for what was about to unfold. Because he knew he wasn't going to like it.

And true to his words, the moment Namjoon pressed play, he didn't like it. Not one bit.

Jungkook couldn't quite pin why your song made his blood boil and heart clench. From an outsider's perspective, it was a good song. A really good song. As a musician himself, Jungkook would never deny that. You had a knack for creating some really great tunes that were out of this world, after all. It was the very thing that made him ask you to start a band with him in the first place.

But there was just something about this piece in particular that seemed different. Your very aura was different, Jungkook concluded as he watched the video, listening to the way you screamed about how good it was that he was able to move on while you haven't. How you laced memories and fragments of your relationship and expertly wove them together to create a masterpiece that echoed into the very depths of his beating heart.

It left a bitter taste in his mouth. Because amidst the chaos, you looked free.

There was something beautiful about the way you were in the middle of a room up in flames, almost to the point where Jungkook knew that it was metaphorical. You liked metaphors. Jungkook remembers how long ago, when the band was just the two of you, you mentioned how metaphors brought out the beauty of the world. They made the ordinary extraordinary. They made the dull come to life. Metaphors were beauty itself, and that's precisely why you loved to play with them so much.

It's funny to see how that part of you hadn't changed, even after how many years.

"Jungkook?" Eunha calls out to him, a concerned look gracing over her face. "You okay?"

Honestly speaking, Jungkook didn't know. The high of his anger had finally settled, and all Jungkook felt was a burning numbness scouring through his veins. It's laughable how mere hours ago, Jungkook was sure that today would be another great day to celebrate how amazing his life was. Yet, here he is, in the middle of a conference room, watching as you submerged yourself underwater at the last scene of your music video, feeling empty.

He doesn't directly answer Eunha, afraid that if he were to say anything, unwanted words would slip from his lips, and he would unleash another round of chaos and hell. And he was too mentally exhausted to go through that again. So he merely nods, clasping Eunha's hand gently and sighing as Namjoon pauses the video, turning towards the group.

"Well," Namjoon says, surveying the room to see the band's reactions. But who was he kidding? He knew damn well that the band wasn't nearly overjoyed seeing and hearing what their old friend had to say, especially Jungkook. The poor kid looked lost. "That's that. It looks too vague to be considered a song catered to Jungkook, so I'll inform the higher-ups that it has nothing to do wi--"

Suddenly, Jungkook stands up, causing a deafening silence to befall once more as everyone watches him with cautious eyes, afraid of what he was about to do.

"I'm going to get a drink," is all he says, moving to head out the door. No one really says anything in protest, Yugyeom and Jaehyun still feeling the aftermath of the previous fight. Only Eunha seemed to be visibly bothered, scoffing at the rest of the team's reactions before quickly latching on to Jungkook's arm.

"Babe, it's still early in the morning. At least let me accompany you?" She asks, that hopeful glint burning brightly in her eyes, to the point that it makes Jaehyun recline back in his seat uncomfortably, not liking the way she seemed so unnatural. You were never like that. And while Jaehyun knew it was wrong to make comparisons, he couldn't help it.

You were his best friend just as much as Jungkook was.

"I'll go alone," is all Jungkook whispers, shrugging Eunha off who is about to protest, but Namjoon is quick to shut her up with a gentle hand on her shoulder, shaking his head when she tries to chase after him. Jungkook needed to settle down and sort his thoughts through if he ever wanted a chance at getting through this situation with you.

And maybe, just maybe, he could finally make amends.

“Do you have a dream?”

This was the question that started it all, Jungkook supposed. He remembers the very day you asked him that one decisive question that, looking back, changed both of your lives. For good or for worse, Jungkook wasn’t sure. But as he reminisces the memories of the past and tries to figure out where everything went wrong, he couldn’t help the gut-wrenching feeling that settles within him. It’s so upsetting, in fact, that the moment Jungkook arrives in the pub across the street, he immediately drowns himself in a bottle of soju.

The two of you were spending the lunch break in the empty stairwell, the same place where the two of you first met and the same place where the two of you gradually started to hang out. It was a quiet space, free from the condescending eyes of the perfection-seeking kids you called classmates. It was a space where you and Jungkook could be free, even for just a little while.

Sipping on his banana milk, Jungkook looks at you curiously. You were staring at the strawberry milk he had bought you, fiddling with it nervously, not even bothering to look him in the eye. He wonders what goes on through your mind, what thoughts dance around within its hollow crevices, shaking you up and causing you to become a nervous wreck. Especially when the question wasn’t as bad as you were probably thinking.

“Hmm, do you want the honest answer or the answer everyone wants to hear?” He asks back, looking up at the ceiling. For an elite school, they didn’t do well to maintain the more hidden areas. Was that a sign that they really didn’t care about things that weren’t relevant to them? Maybe. Maybe not. Jungkook didn’t particularly care. It was just more bearable t stare at the ceiling than sit in awkward silence,

“Honest,” you say after a few moments, much more confident than a few moments ago. After hanging out with you for a few months and observing you within the silence of your conversations, Jungkook somehow knows that no matter what he’d do, you would forever be shy. Regardless if you knew someone well or not, the first moments of conversation would always be parallel to a first meeting. It was a curious thing, honestly. But it was more intriguing once he realized that your confidence grew the more you spoke.

In a way, it was kind of cute.

“I wanna make music,” Jungkook says after snapping himself out of his trance. He once again averts his gaze from yours, but this time it wasn’t to avoid silence, but rather to think, to immerse himself in his thoughts. Because this was the first time, someone had asked him what he truly wanted to do with life. The first time someone wanted an honest answer from him, not a polished response set up to please his parents and peers.

“Not the classical kind, though,” he continues, smiling softly to himself. “Not really fond of it as much as you think.” From the corner of his eyes, Jungkook can see you gaping at him in surprise, and it causes him to chuckle. You were never really expressive beyond the weary walls of the seemingly abandoned stairwell. To the rest of the student body, you were expressionless. Someone who took all the beatings and ridicules with a blank face. As if you were a doll, waiting to be ruined.

But here, you were much more alive. Much more expressive than Jungkook was used to seeing. It was as if the (Y/N) beyond the worn steps of the stairwell was an entirely different person. A mask you placed upon yourself to protect your heart from the cruel reality you had come to face. And Jungkook was more than fascinated at the fact that you had brought that mask down for him.

“If I could, I’d do rock, maybe even some metal If I got enough courage,” he continues, smiling to himself unknowingly giddy at the sight of you. “There’s just something different about it, you know? The music runs through your system and gets you all hyped up; you just can’t resist it. And when the beat drops, it’s as if your emotions are on an all-time high, and it weirdly makes you kind of free. It made me realize that this was what music was supposed to be, I guess.”

“Wow,” you mutter, after staying within the silence of your initial awe. “That’s... poetic.” Jungkook laughs at the look of disbelief in his face, shooting his empty carton of banana milk in the air and watching in satisfaction as it lands straight into the empty trash can just right down the corner before turning to you, a grin high on his lips.

“Oh, come on,” he whines, rolling his eyes playfully. “Why do you sound so surprised? Do I not look like I’d be a good musician?”

“It’s not that!” You quickly exclaim in your defense, flailing your arms in the air to avert Jungkook’s thoughts about the situation. Unbeknownst to you, Jungkook was only joking, highly amused at your reactions, wanting to see more. “I just assumed you’d be more into sports, you know, since you’re so good at it? If you ask me, you kind of look like you’d do well in either football or basketball… so I just kind of assumed that was what you wanted to actually pursue. Not that wanting to pursue music is a bad thing! It’s great, it’s just that rock is kind of unexpected....”

You were beginning to ramble at this point, the shy sheep from within you bursting forth as you fiddled with your thumbs nervously, anxious to see Jungkook’s reaction. Would he be mad at you for assuming things about him off the bat? Probably not, right? You did initiate the conversation by asking him what his dream was, after all. Wait, maybe this was your fault. Gosh, you should have just asked any other question that wasn’t as deep.

This friendship thing was too difficult for your liking.

As you bury yourself in your thoughts, Jungkook couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. It was small at first, almost going unheard by you who was so deeply consumed by the matters of your mind, but the more Jungkook laughed, the louder he got until he was full-on cackling, much to your dismay, confusion, and shock.

“What’s so funny?” You ask frantically, trying to make sense of his actions. Did you say something wrong? As far as you knew, you hadn’t, but what if you had and accidentally crossed the line? You hoped not. You really didn’t want to screw any chance you had at having a real, genuine friend. But to your dismay, your questions remain unanswered as Jungkook continues to laugh, almost as if he wasn’t planning on stopping anytime soon.

“Hey!” You exclaim, pouting. “Stop laughing at me, Jungkook!”

“I-i’m sorry,” He says after a few more laughs, trying to wipe the tears that were beginning to form in his eyes. “I couldn’t help it,” He laughs again, although this time, it seems as if he’s calmed down, sporting a cheeky smile. “Your reactions are just something else!”

Jungkook watches as you become flustered, once more, much to his fascination and amusement. He’s never been the teasing type, or more like, he’s never had the opportunity to become the teasing type, especially with the perfect image he had to curate in front of his peers. But he liked this. He liked being friends with you. It made him all the more free.

“What about you?” He suddenly asks after a while, feeling that it was high time to cut you some slack. You look up at him in confusion as if you had entirely forgotten why this entire conversation had happened in the first place. “Do you have a dream?”

It’s silent, yet this time, Jungkook notes, the silence is uncanny. It’s not the same comfortable silence that Jungkook is used to whenever he was hanging out with you. It was as if the silence had suddenly crashed down and enveloped the cheery atmosphere in its deceitful arms. A trap, if you will.

And Jungkook was unsure whether he wanted to break free from it or stay there with you.

But you take the first step, finally looking up to meet him in the eyes, and Jungkook can feel his heart sink just a tad bit from how empty and solemn they were. “I don’t think so,” is all you say, brushing off the concerned look on Jungkook’s face with a smile. “I’ve never really given it much thought. That’s why I asked,” you chuckle halfheartedly, staring up at the ceiling. “Although I think it would be nice,” you say, smiling a bit more genuinely. “You know, to have a dream?”

Jungkook doesn’t know what to say. How was he supposed to react to that, anyway? No matter how difficult his life was, he had always had a dream. It kept him going, made him push through no matter the difficulty. Dreams were the driving force of life. The hope amidst the darkness. To not have a dream, even just a small one, rattled Jungkook.

It terrified him because now Jungkook realized that he knew nothing about you despite you being his first friend. He didn’t know the reason why you decided to become a living doll in the eyes of others. He didn’t understand why you subjected yourself to such suffering when, from the small talks you and Jungkook had with each other, you seemed to have a loving family.

He wanted to help you, to be there for you. Because he wasn’t sure whether or not you were actually feeling lost. That’s what friends were for, right? Jungkook wasn’t exactly sure on how to do this whole friendship thing, but if there was one thing he did know, it was the fact that friends helped each other.

And Jungkook would be damned if he couldn’t help you in any way that he could.

Soju bottles littered the lone table that Jungkook sat upon. At this point, he wasn’t sure how many bottles he had drunk, but it sure was many, more than he could handle if he were, to be honest, but amidst his drunken state, he just couldn’t find it in himself to care.

Why was he acting like this anyway?

He was supposed to be happy. His band was one of the most successful ones out there. He had thousands, if not millions of fans, who supported him in everything he did. So why, just why was this insignificant matter affecting him so greatly?

Was it because it was you?

“Dear, are you alright?” The old woman, running the pub asks, concerned as she sets down a piping hot bowl of warm hangover soup, which has Jungkook’s mouth watering to the point where drool almost seeps out, mainly because he only had a bite of a sandwich on his way to the office which Eunha forcibly made him eat. But even so, he couldn’t bring himself to eat, especially with the array of emotions that were burning deep within him. “Do you need me to call someone for you?”

Jungkook stays silent, not even bothering to respond to the old lady, who only grows wearier at the lack of response. He didn’t mean to be rude. It was just that he couldn’t find the strength to actually do anything but wallow in his own misery. His thoughts were going on haywire, with no place to land in sight.

What had he done to deserve this? He was sure he had done nothing wrong, so why were you doing this to him when all he had done was, be nothing but nice to you? He had supported you ever since the beginning, and this was how you repaid him?

He doesn’t notice how the old lady leaves to call someone from the company, despite him not saying anything. It was probably for the best anyway. He was too out of it to even ask for help. The old lady was right and kind for going out of her way to do this for him. Although it made sense, after all, this specific pub was where Jungkook had been drinking ever since he had reached adulthood.

Maybe she would call Namjoon? It was likely, but Jungkook hoped not. He was sure that if Namjoon were to see his sorry state, he would scold him until his ears bled out. Although he couldn’t really blame Namjoon, if any manager were to see their client drinking away their woes like he was, they would probably freak out. Primarily since he was known for drinking at most two bottles. Jungkook just really didn’t want to deal with Namjoon right now, especially after what had transpired earlier.

He hoped that she would call Eunha. Sweet, loveable Eunha, who was there for him when the shitshow that was his breakup with you went down. Even until now, Jungkook was still in the dark of why you had left him and the band, but Eunha was the one who stayed by his side. Ever since he had met her two years ago when she first entered the company, they had become the best of friends. And now she was his girlfriend, and he couldn’t be happier.

All of a sudden, a familiar voice wafts through the empty pub. One that has Jungkook’s head whipping everywhere it could to figure out where it was coming from. It was sweet, melodic even. But at the same time, it had a hint of melancholy and freedom? Why was the voice so familiar? Where had he heard it before?

Jungkook’s eyes darted around, trying to see if he could spot the culprit behind his dilemma until they finally landed on the wide TV that sat in the middle of the pub, presumably for their customer’s enjoyment. And lo and behold, in his eyes, he sees you.

It was a local music show where famous stars would often find themselves performing to promote their new music. He assumed you were there to perform your new single, the one song that had him sitting here broken and destroyed with pride in your chest. Did you enjoy this?

Did you enjoy knowing that he was broken because of you?

He hated it. He hated how bright your smile was the moment he caught sight of the camera focusing on you as the hosts began their interview. You were brilliant, cheery, happy. And it sickened Jungkook to the core. Why did it seem like you were doing fine when he was here all bothered? How selfish could you possibly be?

But as much as it hurts him, he can’t find it in himself to look away. It’s a strange sensation that Jungkook couldn’t quite explain. Why couldn’t he avert his eyes from you when all he’s been feeling today was pain? It didn’t make sense. But honestly, Jungkook couldn’t tell what made sense anymore.

He watches you sing, hearing those blasted lyrics that made him rage just mere moments ago. Yet, this time, the lyrics made his heart clench. Perhaps it was the fact that your performance seemed more genuine because you were singing live. But why? Why were you singing those lyrics as if they had genuinely happened to you? Jungkook never caused you any pain, so why did it seem as if you were hurting more than him?

The thoughts were too much. It was driving Jungkook crazy, and all he wanted to do was drown in them. He didn’t want to think. Thinking heightened the pain that brimmed deep within his chest. He just wanted to float in the ocean of his misery and stay there, hoping that someday he would land ashore and the pain would come to an end.

Maybe if he took one more shot, it would help?

He pours down the last remaining soju into his shot glass, not caring if it overflowed and spilled out on the table. Rationality was far out of his mind at this point. All Jungkook wanted to do was do anything that would make him feel numb.

He raises the glass shakily, ready to feel the burning sensation of the alcohol run down his throat, that temporary relief that made him sink deep down into this endless cycle of emptiness. Yet, it doesn’t happen.

A hand shoots down to stop his wrist. It’s a familiar yet unfamiliar hold, something Jungkook can’t quite place. Where has he felt this hold before? He looks up, his eyesight a bit blurry from his drunken state, so he squints, trying to see clearly.

Who was it? Namjoon? Eunha? Heck, Jaehyun?

Turns out it was none of them.

When his sight finally clears, he gasps in shock, breath hitching in his throat as he takes it all in. Because the person, whose hold was familiar yet unfamiliar at the same time, wasn’t his manager, nor was it his girlfriend or best friend.

It was you.

The person, the old lady, had called to get him was you.

Well, Jungkook be damned.

When you got the call from the old lady, you were on your way to your new studio after finishing up a schedule you had prior. The past few weeks have been busy for you. Leaving the band and Jungkook was no easy feat. It was a decision that you knew was a high-risk, high reward yet at the same time had higher chances of failure.

After all, even if you hated to admit it. Without the band, you had nothing.

Sure, there was the fame that came with all of the band’s success. You were the vocalist, after all. It was exhilarating knowing that millions out there would be listening to your voice, singing music you created with people you loved dearly. But in the midst of all of that, there was nothing.

Jungkook, Jaehyun, and Yugyeom had everything going on for them. A backup plan in case the band didn’t succeed. A plan B, if you will. It made sense. They had privilege dripping from the palms of their hand, after all. Even if they had their own troubles and doubts, they didn’t have to worry about finding another way out because there already was a path laid out for them in the beginning.

You went into all of this, risking everything.

It was a choice that you had seemingly made on impulse if an outsider were to look back at the situation. When Jungkook had asked you to start a band with him, it was during another one of your many lunch dates, as you two had jokingly called it. Only this time, the two of you weren’t sitting on the cold and empty stairwell, but instead, you were in the old music room.

“I can’t believe this,” Jungkook mumbles to himself as he cranks the rusted door of the old music room open. People barely used it nowadays, much to his disbelief yet relief at the same time. He couldn’t blame them though, the brand new music room was much more enchanting, filled with top-of-the-grade musical instruments than anyone would drool over.

Well, at least it meant that he could have autonomy over the room (even though that wasn’t really the case). “You’re telling me that you never heard rock or metal before?” He gapes in disbelief as he sits on one of the dusty desks, looking at you with an outraged expression. You sheepishly enter behind him, taking a sip of your drink as you took a seat beside him.

“You never asked,” is all you say, shrugging. Jungkook looks at you once more incredulously, as if he couldn’t believe his eyes and ears. “That’s because I assumed you would have known what rock and metal are! They’re like the greatest music genres of all time. How can you not know it?”

You shrug once more, not really having an answer. Well, you did, but it was probably stupid. After all, if this was his reaction to you not knowing about rock and metal. What would his response be if he were to find out that the only music you’d ever listened to was classical and nursery rhymes? Yeah, probably not a good idea.

“Well, get ready then,” he exclaims, bringing out his phone, much to your surprise. Model student and Mr. Perfect Jeon Jungkook breaking a school rule? Who would have thought that you’d ever lived to see the day? “Because you’re about to experience an awakening, I tell you. A revolution!”

It’s amusing, really. You had never seen Jungkook as passionate as he was at the moment. Was this what it was like to have a dream? His eyes lit up as if sparkles were floating around him. As if he were about to step on cloud nine and enter paradise. He was bouncing his leg lightly in excitement, a goofy smile on his face that kind of reminded you of a bunny.

Maybe having a dream wouldn’t be so bad, after all.

He immediately scoots over to you once he has his phone ready, grabbing his earphones and plugging it into his phone, handing you the other ear. You hold it, a small smile on your face, and hook it unto your ear, not really knowing what to expect but excited all the same. After all, this was the music that made your best friend passionate and hopeful for the future. For sure, it wouldn’t be bad, right?

Well, to say the least, it was an experience. An experience you couldn’t quite tell if you enjoyed or couldn’t fathom. It was entirely different from the music that you were used to. From the bright and soothing tones came ones that were heavy and thundered on your ears. Yet, in a way, it was exhilarating.

You could see why Jungkook was attracted to this style of music. In a way, it was unhinged, a little more rebellious than the traditional types of music you were used to. But that didn’t mean it was worse. In fact, that’s what made it more exciting. Jungkook was right. In those few minutes that he had introduced you to the world of rock, you’ve gone through an array of emotions, from confusion to thrill and excitement of the highest level. The rollercoaster of new sensations was, to say the least, intoxicating,

Because immediately you got hooked.

“Wow,” you mutter, looking up at Jungkook, who was looking back at you with lively eyes. “That was… something else.”

“Right?!” He exclaims, immediately jumping off the desk to grasp your hands in excitement; it was endearing to see. Jungkook rarely got riled up like this. Music truly brought out the best in him, you thought to yourself, watching as he continued to dangle your hands in his. “Isn’t rock just amazing? Oh, what I’d do to pick up an electric guitar and play,” He sighs, and you can tell from the far-away look on his face that he’s daydreaming about something and the sight warms your heart.

“You should,” is all you say, startling Jungkook out of his trance. “I think you’d do absolutely great in music, Jungkook! You should go for it.” Jungkook looks at you, stunned. He blinks, trying to process what you had just said, before clasping your fingers a bit tighter, unsure of himself.

“Really?” He mutters softly, “You really think I can do it?”

“Of course,” you encourage with a bright smile. “If it’s you, then you can do anything!”

It’s silent for a moment, with Jungkook deep in thought. But you don’t necessarily mind, as more than anything, you understood the weight of your words. Being Jungkook’s friend meant that you stuck by him through a lot of undesirable moments, moments that both of you promised to never speak of unless it was absolutely necessary.

You knew how much he longed for his dreams. Ever since that rather inspiring conversation you had around a week ago, you knew just how much Jungkook bottled up his true passions and desires, even though there were moments wherein he would freely let them out.

“Then you have to be there with me,” he says, eyes filled with determination. “I don’t think I can do this without you (Y/N).”

Looking back at it, you chuckle at how swooned you were with Jungkook’s words. It was crazy to think that he had swept you off your feet with a mere ten words that ultimately decided the course of a good chunk of your life. You let him, and for that, you were to blame, But that didn’t necessarily mean that you regretted your decision in its entirety.

Suddenly, your phone rings from beside you, and you grab it from where it lay in your purse, only to see an old number that you hadn’t seen in a while. It’s been a year, you think, as you accept the call, pressing your phone to your ear. “Hello?”

“(Y/N) dear! It’s been such a long time!” You smile at the cheery sound present within the old lady’s voice, although you can’t deny that you hear a twinge of worry within it. You used to go to her pub every so often back when you were still in the band. And the old lady had been such a sweet soul, acting as some sort of parental figure to you and your bandmates through the years.

“It’s good to hear from you again,” you mutter, pleasantly surprised at her sudden call but also a bit suspicious because you had no idea what she was calling for. “May I ask why you’re calling me?”

“Ah!” The old lady exclaims, and suddenly the initial chirp present within her fades into a frantic tone that has your eyebrows furrowing in confusion, not sure what to expect. “Do you mind picking up your boyfriend?”

You blink, confused and startled. “I’m sorry,” you say, still not processing it clearly. “What was that?”

You hear a sigh from the other side of the phone. It sounds tiring, exasperated even, Which shouldn’t be the case since the pub usually opens up later at night. It was only open during the day for company employees. And what sane person would cause trouble with this much sunlight out?

“Your boyfriend dear,” the old lady continues, sounding absolutely done, yet at the same time, the concern was still there, and you swear you hear the sound of glass falling in the back, causing your eyebrows to furrow in worry. “He’s been drinking for hours, and this is more than he’s ever drunk!”

You stay silent, letting it all sink in. The only person she could have possibly been referring to was Jungkook. There was no doubt about that. After all, the old lady’s pub was where you and Jungkook would often find yourselves having late-night rendezvous, drinking the night away as you bonded over whatever life was throwing at you within those moments.

But now, the pub gave you nothing but pain.

“Grandma, I’m sorry to tell you this, but me and Jungkook aren’t—”

“—So you’ll come, yes? Thank you, dear! Truly a lifesaver!”

She hangs up. You stare at your phone in disbelief, shocked at the predicament you had unknowingly gotten yourself into. What were you supposed to do now? The responsible thing to do was to probably phone Namjoon and tell him about the situation. But with what had just transpired earlier today with the release of your single last night and your performance this morning, you’re not so sure he would appreciate any sort of contact from you.

With a sigh, you turn to head towards the pub. No matter how much you hated Jungkook for the way he treated you within the last few stages of your relationship, you couldn’t leave him alone to wallow in his misery (even though there was a part of you that was secretly glad that he was torn because of you). It would be too cruel of you. Especially considering that Jungkook had been a significant part of your life.

Huh, guess you haven’t moved on as much as you thought you had.

Even just reaching the pub brought back memories that you wish wouldn’t resurface. You and Jungkook used to wrestle over who would open the door for the other, and more often than not, Jungkook won. But you weren’t one to lose quickly, even to him.

The familiar jingle that came with opening the door brought a pang of nostalgia to your heart. When you and Jungkook would enter the pub, just ten seconds after the jingle faded away, the old lady would come out of her quaint kitchen and say

“Welcome home— Oh, there you are, dear!”

Not exactly how you remembered it, but it was still familiar all the same.

“Hello grandma, how are you?” You greet with a solemn smile, watching with fond eyes as the old lady comes up to clasp your hands within her own. “Oh dear, I haven’t seen you in forever. Why haven’t you visited in so long?”

You’re not sure what to say. How are you supposed to tell her that you left and broke up with the man she asked you to pick up? That would put her in an awkward position, and you didn’t want to cause stress for the already weary lady.

“Oh, never mind that,” she says, luckily dropping the subject. “Come in, come in, your boyfriend’s over there drinking in the corner. Did something happen? I’ve honestly never seen him drink this much before. At this rate, he’s going to finish my soju supply before I open up for the night!”

You enter the main area, and immediately you’re hit with the familiar, comforting scent of alcohol and home-cooked meals, as odd as it sounds. Although the smell of alcohol was by far heavier in the air, and as you turn to look for the source, your eyes land in Jungkook.

And you’re, for lack of a better word, shocked.

It was almost as if he was drowning in an ocean of soju bottles, with some of the alcohol dripping off the table and into the ground or his clothes. Partly because he was pouring himself another shot, which you know he can’t take.

He could barely handle two bottles when the two of you were dating, so why did it feel like he was drinking more than ten. If he wasn’t stopped now, something majorly damaging could happen to him, and as much as you never wanted to speak to him, you couldn’t just ignore him when he was literally on the brink of life and death.

You stomp on over to where he’s at, hastily quickening your steps as he’s about to down his last shot, and before you can even think about what to do, your instincts act on their own, and your hand reaches out to him, stopping him.

No words are spoken. Rather, you can’t find the words to say as you watch with solemn eyes as Jungkook looks at his hand confused. He tries to shake it, to move his arm so he can bring the shot glass to his lips, but you remain firm in your grip, clasping just a bit harder so he wouldn’t push through with the shot.

He looks around, following the trail left by your grasp until he meets your eyes, and already you can feel the whirlwind of emotions bubbling up inside you. This was the first time you and Jungkook have met after the breakup after leaving the band. You never expected the two of you to meet this way. Although, you supposed life was funny like that. It liked to throw unexpected situations in your face, especially in the most inappropriate times.

You watch as he squints, trying to make sense of who you were before he gasps, arm slacking, falling into the side as the alcohol from the shot glass splatters into the air. He squints once more as if trying to ensure that what he was seeing in front of him was real before stammering.

“(Y/N)?” He whispers, broken, voice breaking. You try not to let your emotions show, knowing that if you do, he’d only lure you back into him, which was something you did not want at all. You were done. After many months, heck years of being torn apart by him, you couldn’t afford any more pain. It would break you even more than it already did,

“Hey,” you whisper back, breath hitching as you watch the way Jungkook’s eyes widen at the sound of your voice, loud and clear for him to hear. Even with his drunken state, he can’t deny the pang of nostalgia that runs through his veins once he finally registers that it’s you standing before him. In the flesh. Not a vision on TV or a picture of you from his memories.

It was you.

“What are you doing here?” He slurs, trying to reach out to you, but you move away, refusing him any form of affection. Because you two were too far gone for that.

“Grandma called,” is all you say, the disappointed look in Jungkook’s eyes not going unnoticed. “Asked me to pick you up. Said you’ve been drinking more than you used to and… I can see that.”

You gesture to the empty soju bottles that littered the table with a grimace, turning back to Jungkook only to hear him scoff and point a finger to you accusingly, although with his drunken state, his posture was way off. “Who do you think’s to blame?” He asks, sarcasm laced within his tone. You raise an eyebrow at that, choosing to let him continue before you could offer back any sarcastic remark of your own.

“It’s you!” He continues, slamming his fist to the table, much to your surprise. “You and your stupid fucking song…. I mean, what the fuck is up that?”

“What the fuck is up with what, Jungkook?” You quip back, eyeing his fist cautiously in the case he would do something dangerous that would either injure him, you, or if worse comes to worst, both.

“Don’t play dumb with me,” He continues, and Jungkook can feel the irritation, frustration, and fatigue build within him now that he’s finally gotten a chance to let all these raging emotions out. “You know what you did! Why’d you do it, huh?” His voice grows louder, causing you to flinch as you move your chair back just a bit.

“Why’d you have to ruin my fucking reputation?”

All of a sudden, it’s like something in you snaps.

You can’t believe it. You can’t believe the audacity Jungkook had to say something as outrageous and stupid as what he just said. The emotions that were already burning up within you finally exploded as you stared at him with all the anger and disbelief you could muster.

And here you thought he was drinking because he had finally realized all the wrongs he had done to you. What a fool you were.

“Excuse me?” You say, exasperated. “What did you just fucking say?”

“I said what I said (Y/N),” Jungkook continued, not noticing the way rage was about to take you into its waiting arms, only to allow you to explode upon him with all the pent-up hurt that you’ve accumulated inside you. “You and your fucking song ruined the band any my reputation. Is this how you repay me after everything I’ve done for you?”

You blink. The words slowly make their way towards you as you try to process them, letting out a chuckle at how ridiculous his words were. “Are you being serious right now?” You say, scoffing at how there wasn’t an inch of regret on Jungkook’s face. “You’ve got to be joking, right?”

You want to give him the benefit of the doubt. You want to give him a chance to prove your ears, mind, and heart wrong. That he wasn’t actually thinking those absurd thoughts that had your gut-wrenching and your heartbreaking after already being broken. This couldn’t be the Jungkook that you knew, right? He wouldn’t be this cruel, right?

“Do I look like I’m joking?”

“You piece of shit.” You spat without even realizing it, surprising Jungkook. He’s sobered up just a little from your outburst, looking at you like a deer caught in headlights. For a moment, you regret speaking without any thought. But the more you try to rationalize it, the more the anger burns. This was unacceptable.

“Reputation?” You scoff, looking at him incredulously. “You’re fucking worried about your reputation when there are bigger issues to be addressed here?”

“(Y/N) I—”

“Shut up, Jungkook,” you say, cutting him off coldly. “You don’t get a say in this when all you’re worried about is your reputation over a broken relationship with someone you’ve grown up with for the past thirteen years!”

Wide-eyed, Jungkook gapes at you, and you, in your disgruntled state, take this chance to get back at him, unleashing all the feelings you’ve buried deep inside you.

“You dare ask me why I’m treating you this way when you’ve been nothing but nice to me?” You mock, his words hurting more than they should. “Do you even bother to ask yourself as to why I broke up with you in the first place, Jungkook? Why I left? Did you even bother to listen to my song?”

His silence echoes throughout the pub, further shattering any lingering hope that you had about the situation. “No,” he says after a while, firm in his belief as he stared back at you, although his gaze seemed as if it could easily water away. “Didn’t think it was necessary; after all I did nothing wro—”

“—You treated me like shit for the last two years of our relationship, Jungkook. That’s what you did wrong.” You exclaim, not wanting to hear his excuses. “Are you really this blind to not know? To not see your own faults?”

How could he? You think to yourself, the unbearable pain of this revelation thrumming through every fibre of your being. It was painful. Painful to hear that he hadn’t even thought about the situation through your lens. He was too absorbed with what he had going for himself that he failed to see the world through your eyes, and it frustrated you to no end.

Because that breakup broke you like no other.

Choosing to leave wasn’t an easy decision, by no means. You had risked everything to help support Jungkook in hopes that you would find a dream of your own. You joined the band, knowing that you would put your family’s safety and security at risk instead of pursuing a more stable career like starting a business or becoming a doctor.

You became selfish to follow Jungkook, so of course, you were attached.

Jungkook, in a sense, was your world. You suppose, looking back at it now, that wasn’t the healthiest decision you took for yourself. But at that time, you could not help yourself. He was your first friend, your first love, your first everything. Jungkook showed you the ways of the world and then shattered it without a care. Of course, more than any other breakup, it would tear you apart.

Because to be honest, loving Jungkook made you happy. You remember when he first asked you out. Probably one of the best moments of your entire life. It happened after your band’s first major gig to open up the local summer festival. The two of you were still calming down from the high of the performance, excited, thrilled to have finally been given the opportunity in front of a bigger crowd. It felt surreal seeing the fascinated faces and happy smiles as they listen to your music.

Jungkook was right. This feeling was incredible.

“Holy shit. That was amazing,” Jaehyun laughs, hugging Yugyeom before turning to hug you and Jungkook. “I can’t believe we just did that!”

“Do you think they liked us?” Yugyeom, ever the timid one asks. “I felt like I made a mistake somewhere along the second cho—“

“—Who cares, man?” Jungkook says, cutting Yugyeom off with a playful slap to the back. “We just fucking performed our first major gig. This isn’t time to be wallowing down on our mistakes. This is a time to celebrate!”

You and Jaehyun hollered in agreement, following Jungkook as he dragged Yugyeom backstage where the four of you packed up, took a few commemorative pictures, and made your way towards the nearest convenience store to celebrate the night with some good old ramen, ice cream, and whatever your hearts desired.

It was a fun night, one filled with laughter as the four of you joked about whatever your mind could think of. Jungkook boasted about how he was right about their band getting somewhere, of how Jaehyun and Yugyeom, who were much more hesitant in joining the band, and after months of no progress, we’re beginning to regret it, had nothing to worry about.

Jaehyun and Yugyeom even mustered up the courage to do a speed eating challenge, grabbing about her round of hot piping ramen and racing to see who could eat it the fastest, despite the heat burning their tongues both literally and figuratively.

It was a night where for once, the four of you didn’t have to worry about life outside of the band. Didn’t have to worry about the social pressure from school or home, Didn’t have to worry about stupid tests or becoming the best, for once the four of you could just be yourselves. Unapologetic and free.

When Jaehyun and Yugyeom decided to pack it up and head home, saying that if they didn’t arrive before their dreaded curfew, then their parents would literally send them to the pits of hell, you didn’t notice the way Jungkook grew silent. Maybe you did, but you were too preoccupied with the nauseated looks on Jaehyun and Yugyeom’s faces as they headed towards the public restroom to flush out the ramen in their system.

“Hey (Y/N)?” Jungkook asks once Jaehyun and Yugyeom are nowhere to be seen. You hum in response, turning to look back at him, and immediately your eyes become overwhelmed with worry at the serious look on his face as he gazes up at the night sky, seemingly nervous and scared.

“Will you go out with me?”

It’s unexpected, a bomb to your heart if you could call it. You gasp the moment the words flow out of his mouth, staring at Jungkook in shock. Did he really just ask you out?

You think it’s a joke. A cruel trick of nature. But by the way, Jungkook nervously fidgets from where he sits, and his eyes nervously dart around. Like they usually do during nerve-wracking situations like these, you knew in your heart that his words were true.

And you couldn’t be more overjoyed because you had fallen for Jeon Jungkook too.

Throughout your many years of friendship, you had gotten to know Jungkook inside out. You were there when he threw a mini tantrum over missing first place in the final exam by one point, knowing that his parents would be disappointed in him. You were there when the two of you went out to buy his first-ever electric guitar after months of saving up money secretly. You were there for him when he was convincing Jaehyun and Yugyeom to join the band, even when he was about to get into a fight with Jaehyun over the matter.

And like clockwork, you had fallen.

It wasn’t particularly hard to do so. Jungkook had this certain charm to him, after all. He was an enigma. He could draw people into his rhythm like it was nothing and have them follow to the beat of his own drum. Sometimes you wondered if there was a hidden secret with the way he could so easily attract people, but the more you hung out, the more you realized that wasn’t the case at all. He was genuine in everything he did.

“Yes,” you say without hesitation, causing Jungkook to whip his head to face you in the blink of an eye, mouth slacking in shock. He blinks, you smile, and suddenly a smile of his own is forming on his face, reaching all the way into his eyes.

“For real?” He whispers, not wanting this moment to slip away from his grasp. He was so close to having you in his arms, something he’s wanted for the longest time, that he was afraid that if he spoke any louder, he would ruin any chance he got. But your reassuring gaze and gentle hold immediately calm the raging wave of anxiety within him. “For real,” you affirm, and suddenly you’re in Jungkook’s embrace.

It’s a warm embrace, one that has you returning it back with the same vigor, the same excitement bubbling in your chest. This marked the beginning of a new chapter for you and Jungkook, one where the two of you would walk down the unclear path you have chosen, still remaining by each other’s side, but this time, with hands intertwined.

You just wished it didn’t go up into flames like this.

You blink, snapping out of your trance as you gaze at Jungkook. Once more, seeing the way his lips were pursed into a thin line, his brows furrowed as if he had a lot going on through his mind. Which was only fitting. He had to, or else this wave of hurt and pain would only intensify and turn into something you would never be able to control.

Remembering the happy moments was something you had promised yourself not to do, for it only brought you into another world of pain after looking at how the two of you were faring now. But in the midst of agony staring right at you, you couldn’t help but let yourself reminisce in hopes of relieving some of that anger and hurt so you wouldn’t do anything out of hand.

“Tell me, Jungkook,” you finally say after a moment of silence, and you want to curse yourself for the way your voice cracks at the end. You had to be strong. You had to get through this. Because there was no way, you were going to let Jungkook ruin you once more. “How do you think our relationship was going within the last two years?”

Silence befalls the room for what feels like the millionth time, But this one is heavier than the last. Jungkook looks at you with such a severe gaze that you almost falter, forgetting the fact that he’s drunk with the way his eyes bore into yours.

You dread his answer, not knowing what to expect. With the way, he was acting, and with all the things he’s said and done, you knew that his words would only hurt you even more from here on out. You clutch the fanfic of your sweater tightly, hanging on by a thread.

But he says nothing.

The heavy silence lasts longer, and the more it persists, the more disappointment and disbelief creep into the cracked crevices of your already broken heart. Was he really going to act this way? Saying nothing at all? Did your relationship mean nothing to him in the past 2 years?

“Unbelievable,” you mutter, letting out a scoff as your eyes scan his figure. He’s hunched up as if unsure of what to do, what to think, or what to say. There’s probably a flurry of emotions running through his mind, but you don’t pity him. You hope it continues to weigh heavy, as it did to you for the last three years.

“I was miserable, Jungkook,” you whisper, recounting the memories you had buried deep within, afraid to open them up again at the cost of your already fragile happiness. But to be truly happy, one needs to let go of all the agony locked within. “Ever since Eunha came into our lives, you started treating me like a side character, as if I wasn’t your girlfriend.”

“And no,” you say sternly, already knowing what Jungkook was to say by the way his eyes widened and his mouth slacked, an arm up in protest for your words. “I’m not blaming Eunha entirely, contrary to what you may think. Sure, her arrival started it all. Sure, there were times where she acted so out of line that I wanted to slap her in the face n’s remind her who exactly she was talking to. But I couldn’t. Do you know why, Jungkook?”

His eyebrows furrow in confusion, and you take a deep breath as you gather your thoughts. This was the first time you were finally going to let out all of your frustrations that’s been building up inside you for the past few years. It was a nerve-wracking feat, but a necessary one nonetheless, as even in those few moments of speaking, you were starting to feel just a bit more free.

“Because I didn’t even know who I was anymore.”

Jungkook’s never been this confused in his life.

It’s as if you had dropped a bomb on him without warning, causing him to be in a frenzy. What did you mean? How could you blame Eunha? Eunha was a sweet girl who could do no wrong. She was there for him whenever he needed that extra support, whenever he needed someone to ground him in this cruel, unforgiving world.

She was there when you weren’t and was a constant in his life. How could such a sweet girl like her be the catalyst of this catastrophic situation? It had to be a joke.

“You’re lying,” he mutters, shaking his head in disbelief. The pain in his heart was coming back again, and just when he thought he had finally gotten rid of that after drowning in alcohol moments ago. This was your fault. You and your stupid song, your stupid lies. You were driving me crazy.

“I’m lying?” You ask, and Jungkook looks up to meet your eyes, feeling another burst of pain shoot through him at the agonizing expression on your face. Why did you look so hurt? He did nothing wrong. He didn’t hurt you. He couldn’t have. He had always been there for you. He was the reason you could do what you could in the first place. There was just no way that misery was because of him.

“Jungkook, did you even realize that with how much time you were spending with Eunha, you weren’t spending time with me anymore? Remember how you used to walk me home at midnight after your time at the studio and my radio show? You stopped doing that ever since she appeared.”

Lies.

“For days, I stood outside the company for hours, waiting for you to bring me home because you promised that you’d never miss it for the world. And on the day that I finally decided to check up on you, worried that you might have been overworking yourself? I see you in the studio, laughing with Eunha.”

Jungkook wanted to scream. He was stressed. He had to make music. Why couldn’t you understand that?

“And when I confronted you about it? You shrugged me off, saying I was overly dramatic.”

You are. Jungkook insists in his head, thoughts spiraling. What’s wrong with him not bringing you home. Even if he was your boyfriend, he was not obligated to, right? You were supposed to understand him, right? That’s what lovers are supposed to do.

“I thought to myself, maybe you were right. Maybe I was overdramatic, so I did what you asked and shrugged me off. Yet, with each passing day, it felt like I was a stranger in your eyes. Do you even realize Jungkook that ever since Eunha came into our lives, we’ve only been on three dates?”

You’re too demanding, his mind screams. Three dates? That was plenty for successful stars of your caliber. You had to understand that being under the limelight meant that he couldn’t reserve all the time in the world for you.

His heart clenches painfully again, and Jungkook feels a sob hitch in his throat.

“It hurt.” You cry, letting out the words that Jungkook wanted to say. “It hurt so much watching the love of my life and my best friend toss me to the side. Where was the you that promised that you’d always be there for me? Where was the you that promised to stay?”

You’re crying now, tears streaming down your face as the words you’ve kept hidden for the longest time finally make their way out of your system. Every part of you was screaming in agony and pain, and you can feel the mended parts of your patched-up heart slowly break again.

“Jungkook, I loved you. I loved you so much that I risked it all for you. I joined the band even though I wasn’t sure of our future because I saw how happy you were. You showed me what happiness could be, and I’ll never be able to thank you enough for that, but at the same time, you showed me firsthand real pain and heartbreak. And I don’t think I can ever forgive you for doing that.”

No. Why? You had to forgive him. You were his best friend. Stop. Stop speaking. Stop it.

“I left because I wanted to keep what we still had within our memories.” You whisper, remembering the night you finally came to your decision. Remembering all the times you cried and broke down, not knowing what to do or where you should go. All the times where you forced yourself to put on a smile on your face and act as if everything was fine even though it wasn’t.

“And I hoped that in leaving, we could pick up all the broken pieces and create something new with them. Maybe it would not have been a relationship as strong as the one we’ve had before. But at least it was something. And at least I would have still had a connection to you.”

You’re calm now, in a much better headspace than before. But that didn’t mean the ocean of despair that you surrounded yourself in dwindled in the slightest. It was still there, waiting in silence for the moment it could envelop you once more into its treacherous arms and drown you in its suffocating whispers.

“But what the fuck is this?”

You can feel the tides begin to sway, and you will yourself desperately to keep them down. With how the situation was unfolding, you needed to be the bigger person. For your sanity, For Jungkook’s, and for the closure that you both needed, which you weren’t sure would ever peacefully come to an end.

“I never thought that you’d think of us like this Jungkook,” you whisper, and much to your horror, a tear slipped from the crevices of eyes as you hurriedly wiped them, standing up to grab your purse as you stood to leave the pub, not caring one bit if Jungkook got home safely or not, you were too overwhelmed to care.

“I thought you loved me,” You whisper as you turn to look at him one final time, and all of a sudden, Jungkook is hit with wave after wave of sadness, anger, pain, frustration radiating from you. It suffocates him, and the only thought running through his head were questions of him hurting you? Was this really all his fault?

“But I guess you only loved yourself.” A chuckle falls from your lips as you make your first step out of the door. Not paying mind to the old lady who looks at you with a worried gaze, you turn to open the door of the pub, only for someone else to beat you to it.

Lo and Behold, It’s Eunha.

“You,” She gasps as she takes in your disheveled and exhausted state. Although that immediate shock quickly disappears as she catches Jungkook’s equally petrified state from the corner of her eye. She then glares at you, but you honestly can’t find the energy within you to care.

Because this was never about her in the first place, even if in some way she plays a small part.

“What did you do?” Eunha spats as she rushes past you to go to Jungkook, not even bothering to hear you out. You sigh, gathering the last remaining buts of courage within clenched fists, and make your way out of the door, leaving Jungkook, your broken heart, and the memories you two shared behind for good.

Not caring what he would do with those fragments in the end.

“Jungkook!”

Eunha exclaims, immediately hooking her arms around him and hoisting him up into an embrace. “What happened? What did that bitch do?” But Jungkook doesn’t answer, thoroughly overwhelmed by the range of emotions that had just surpassed him from his conversation with you.

Was it truly his fault? Was he the reason why things had turned out this way? There was no way right. He had treated you right, right?

Jungkook tries to convince himself that he’s done nothing wrong, that he was perfectly innocent in this situation. But that nagging feeling deep within his mind and soul screams at him to finally realize the truth. He’s scared. He doesn’t want to know what lies beyond the bubble of happiness he had placed himself in. He doesn’t want to feel the agonizing pain he’s put himself through without realizing it.

But not doing so would kill him more than knowing the truth ever will.

So he opens the door to the truth and wallows in the misery of what he’s done.

To be fair, there was some truth to Jungkook’s words. He had treated you like you were the most precious thing in the universe. And that was because, for the longest time, Jungkook did consider you highly special to him. You were his first friend, the first person he could confide his feelings in, the first person who showed him what love could be like.

You grew up together, cried together, had your first drink together, stood on stage for the first time together. You had done just about everything together, and Jungkook cherished you more than anything in the world.

In everything he did, he always tried to make you a part of it. Whether that meant buying your favorite drink or sending you pictures of whatever he was doing, Jungkook always wanted to help you see the world through his eyes because you deserved that much.

Ice cream dates, sneaking out at night to have some chicken and beer, random dates at the local arcade, a stroll at the beach. You and Jungkook had practically done it all. So, where did it all fall apart? Where did Jungkook go wrong?

“Jungkook?” Eunha calls out, and Jungkook finally musters up the courage to look at Eunha, who was worriedly trying to get him to answer her. Her hold is familiar, something he’s been used to in the past two years, yet at the same time, something was missing within her warmth. An unexplainable feeling he couldn’t quite describe.

And then he realized it wasn’t you.

Just when did he go astray? When did he start treating you like you weren’t the world to him? For sure, it wasn’t a singular moment. It was most definitely a culmination of many events that led up to his demise. But just how did it happen?

He looks at Eunha’s worried eyes, those same eyes that he thought meant the world to him within those two years of your break up. Yet, for some reason, he just couldn’t look at them in the same way anymore. Not when there was this hollow emptiness in his heart that called out for you and only you,

It was like a game of tug and war in his heart. He still loved Eunha; that much was for sure. But he couldn’t deny the love that he had for you as well. He remembered how Eunha was like a breath of fresh air for him. In the midst of all your nagging for him to take care of himself when he was working his ass off making new songs and dealing with management, Eunha was there to simply smile and encourage Jungkook.

Like a fool, he got lured into Eunha’s charm and held onto it, not noticing that he was letting go of you in the process.

His heart wails. It cries in pain and desperation of the love it has lost. Why did it have to be this way? Why was Jungkook such a fool? So consumed by his own selfishness, he abandoned the love you two shared and sought another, and now he was reaping what he had sown.

You were gone. You would never come back. Whatever love you had between the two of you had left and died out. The world was cruel. It had given Jungkook so much hope yet took it away from him the moment he slipped up. Yet, he couldn’t really blame them. He couldn’t really blame you.

Because he knew you had tried, he could see it in the way your eyes still cried out in pain when you see him. He could hear it in the agony of your voice as you sang passionately in your songs. He knew you did your best to pick up the fallen pieces and try to mend them back together. But all Jungkook did was rip them apart all over again.

Life couldn’t have been any better for Jeon Jungkook until suddenly it was not.

And he was the only one to blame.

➢ taglist: @wearenot7withu @nadiaislas @bbydoejk

#bts x reader #bangtan x reader #jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook x reader #jeongguk x reader #jeon jeongguk x reader #bts jungkook x reader #bts fanfiction

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kimnjss · 3 years

Note

lmao now i lowkey need a bmb drabble where hyunki gets in trouble at school for cussing 💀

[ hyunki cusses at his school girlfriend... ] 1.1K words

“Why are you bringing me to see daddy?” Hyunki is asking from his spot behind you. It's the first thing he's said since he was begrudgingly apologizing to his teacher and stomping down the school steps and to the car. He didn't even ask you to turn on his favorite station or put in a request for dinner. He knew he was in trouble and it was obvious with then nervous kick of his legs.

The last thing you imagined when picking him up was to be pulled aside by his teacher, him sat behind her and avoiding eye contact. He spoke quietly when telling you why he was sitting there. Pout heavy on his lips while he tells you he swore at a kid today. You refrain from asking what he said, instead getting him to understand why what he dd was wrong

But, you didn't reprimand him. There was only one place he could've picked up on the kind of language, so he was no to blame. Yet, after listening to you, he felt like he should apologize and of course you weren't going to tell him no.

Despite the fact you hadn't yelled at him or punished him in any type of way, he knew that he wasn't off the hook. The fact that you were parked in front of his father's work was proof enough. “Both me and daddy have to have a chat with you.” He's nodding slightly, lips trembling as he reaches to unbuckle his seatbelt.

“Don't cry. It's just a chat.” Your words end up doing the exact opposite of their intent, the tears that he had been holding back quickly rushing down his cheeks.

Hyunki cries loudly, hands uselessly trying to wipe the tears that keep rushing. “I don't want to chat! Daddy is gonna be mad and he won't want to play with me anymore,” He sobs, cries growing louder as you move toward the backseat.

You could handle this on you own and fill Yoongi in when he got home. You've done it that way countless times before, but after he was expressing how he liked to be apart of these type of conversations, you were making sure to have these talks where he's able to weigh in. Which was something Hyunki hated with a passion.

He'd rather just get in trouble with one parent and then run to the other, it was much harder to do that when it was the both of you at the same time. “Daddy's always going to want to play with you,” You try to assure him, though he's not convinced.

Hyunki doesn't fight you the way you expect when you're lifting him from his car seat. He lets you pull him from the car, cheek resting on your shoulder as you make your way to the front doors. You can hear his sniffles against your ear and can clearly imagine the pout on his lips.

When you're reaching Yoongi's studio, you find him seated in front of the computer. Jungkook is sat criss-cross behind him on the couch, scrolling through his iPad, but he's the first one to notice that you've entered the room. “Are you back to being a baby, Hyun? Can't walk anymore?” He says as he stands, arms reaching out to lift Hyunki from your grasp.

You're surprised with how easily he goes, clinging to Jungkook's side and pushing his face into his neck. “You're crying?” He tries to crane his neck to look, but Hyunki refuses to move.

“He's in trouble,” You say as you tap your fingers against Yoongi's shoulder. He turns instantly, pushing the headphones from his ears to greet you with a large smile. A smile that quickly fades when his eyes are focusing on his sad son. “What's wrong with you, buddy?”

He doesn't say anything, doesn't even move from his spot in Jungkook's arms. “He got in trouble in school today,” You fill in, earning a look of shock from your boyfriend. The same look that you had when you were being told what he did.

Hyunki hardly ever had any issues at school. He stayed away from the kids that he didn't like and played nicely with the kids that he did. He did his work when he felt like it and spoke up when he didn't. Loved to show off his skills and complimented his friends on theirs. So the fact that he was in trouble, didn't make sense to Yoongi.

“Why don't you tell daddy what you said today?” He sniffles loudly, letting out three long breathes before he's pulling his head back, tearing eyes shifting between you and his father. “Sana fell and she scraped her knee. She was crying a lot, but it didn't look like it hurt that bad. I fall all the time... so I told her to stop being a fucking bitch about it.”

Your jaw has hit the floor and Yoongi's eyes might as well be saucers. It's silent for a solid minute, both of you in complete shock. You know where he's heard that before. If he had gotten in trouble for simply saying 'fuck' or maybe shouting 'shit' while dropping something, you would've been the culprit.

But, 'stop being a fucking bitch about it,' was your boyfriend's catchphrase. The amount of times he's said it to his friends, to you and apparently to Hyunki was astounding.

Jungkook is bursting into laughter, eyes closing and body bending backward. He doesn't stop laughing even with the deadly glare he gets from Yoongi across the room. “It's not funny.” He says, although you can see that he's trying to hold back his own laughter. He doesn't want to give Hyunki the impression that stuff like this is okay.

“What did that girl say when you said that?” You speak when Jungkook has finally settled down.

Hyunki doesn't look as sad anymore, composed enough to explain himself without sniffling through his entire sentence. “Sana. My girlfriend.” He says, replacing the 'that girl' statement with her name. First time you're hearing of a girlfriend, but okay. “She said I was mean and pushed me. Then she said that we couldn't play together anymore,”

“You have a girlfriend?” Yoongi's much more interested in this topic than the brief slip of tongue. He grins wide when Hyunki nods, shooting a list of questions at him about the girl. Somewhere between him gushing about the pretty girl with butterfly clips, Yoongi is explaining to him what words are for at home and for grownups.

He encourages him to apologize to his girlfriend so that they can start playing together again and then he's pulling a smiling Hyunki into his lap, letting him play games on his computer while the two of you talk about your plans for the rest of the day.

#be my baby sm au #yoongi sm au #yoongi drabble #asks; be my baby 🦋#asks; kez 🍯

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joyful-voyager · 3 years

Text

So here's the thing.

Updated:

I just wanted to let all of you who replied or messaged me that, shortly after posting the rant below, I sat my husband down and made him listen to me for 30 solid minutes. It was not a pleasant experience, but we both got some things out in the open that really needed to be aired. What it all boiled down to is this: I'm doing so well with my treatment that he'd kind of set aside the idea that I have an incurable disease. And once that was no longer at the forefront of his mind, he reverted to old patterns of behavior that he'd kept in check while I was undergoing chemo. Also, he didn't feel comfortable talking to his therapist via ZOOM since we are all here together all day, every day. I totally get it. We're trying to figure out a time for him to see the therapist again when my daughter and I can get out of the house, or put on noise-canceling headphones, or something.

I finally impressed upon him the idea that I have an expiration date. We can't wait for things to get better between us because I simply don't have the time. We need to work on this now, or make a conscious decision not to and part ways. What I'm absolutely not wiling to do is go on the way we are now ... because of the aforementioned expiration date. I am 50 years old. I'm going to be fortunate to live to see 55, and 60 is probably not realistic at all. I need to pack as much living as possible into whatever time I have left. I'd like to spend them in a loving relationship. I'm hopeful that we can get back to one. But if six months go by and we're still in the limbo we're in now, one of us will have to leave. I think he finally understands that now.

So that's how things wound up. Thank you all for your concern and support and words of advice. We'll see what ends up happening. We're both doing our best to make things better, so maybe this will have a happy ending after all.

Original post below the cut.

I have terminal cancer. My oncology team and everybody around me uses the word "chronic" instead of terminal, but the reality is that even if I respond well to the treatment I'm on, someday it will fail. I will move on to a new treatment until that one fails. And I will repeat this cycle until there are no more treatments to try, or my quality of life is so poor because of treatment side effects that I elect to stop treatment and enter hospice and wait for what will likely be a quick and painful end. I probably have somewhere between 3 and 10 years to live, assuming CRISPR and mRNA technologies don't progress enough in the next few years to save me.

And I just admitted to myself something I've known deep down for years: I don't really enjoy spending time with my husband anymore.

I feel like I want to spend my final years with someone who is fun to be around. My husband used to be that man. He's not anymore. He's unhappy in his job, and now that I also work from home, I am acutely aware of the fact that he spends 8 hours a day screaming at his computer in the basement. (Lest you think I am making that up, a few months after he started working from home permanently, the woman who shares our duplex complained to me about the constant profanity coming from our basement Monday-Friday. That was three years ago. Now I get it. My glib answer of, "Don't listen" doesn't work when the man in question has a voice like a megaphone and no filter on his mouth.) He screams profanities when he drops things. He screams profanities when he can't get the remote on the TV to work properly. A week or so ago, he screamed profanities while standing in the shower. When he got out, I asked him what the problem was; he couldn't get the top off of his shower soap, and that apparently was enough to make him yell "motherfucker" three times at the top of his lungs.

This is ... not normal.

Nor is it pleasant.

He complains about everything. Everything. The heat, the cold, the old storm windows that our landlord refuses to replace. The dog barking down the street. The flickering street light. The email notifications on his phone that he has never turned off because he refuses to learn how to actually use the phone. The WiFi that gets glitchy now and then. The TV shows we try to watch together. The sun creating a glare on his iPad.

He just complains constantly, and it's exhausting to be around.

I'm to the point where I'm about to just sit him down and talk to him about it, and say, "Look, I have a really limited amount of time left, and I'd like to spend it with someone I enjoy being around. I deserve that. You used to be the person I most liked to spend time with. I don't know if you've changed or I have, or we both have, but this isn't working for me anymore. And I feel really sad about it. What can we do?" But I don't think it'll make a difference. He's old and set in his ways and refuses to face the reality that I'm going to be gone someday, so maybe he should be more appreciative our time together a little more and not be such a jerk.

I mean, it's not like I have a lot of options here. Divorce seems dicey at this point. And while I dream of finding someone who makes me happy with whom to spend my final years, I don't really see that happening even if we did divorce and I attempted to date again. Breaking the ice with someone by saying, "I like baseball and Star Trek and Shakespeare, I like to go on long hikes and I'm training for a sprint triathlon, and oh, by the way, I have maybe 10 years to live," seems sort of daunting.

So Tumblr, I just don't know what to do. I feel like I deserve better than all of this. I miss my fun husband. He skedaddled about the time our daughter was 10, which would have been 12+ years ago. I want that guy back, or I want a guy who appreciates his time with me instead of just filling every minute with complaints and profanity and anger.

Cancer sucks. It sucks even more when you're stuck with someone you maybe don't want to be with anymore.

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chonzu · 3 years

Text

This is the beginning of an idea I had where Atsuhiro survives the attack and ends up in Tartarus. I want to expand on it but I’ve worked on this for a few days and I’m happy with it I suppose! Spoilers for Chapter 294/295 ofc.

I apologize for the weird formatting, I’ve been working on mobile/iPad for a while now.

He loved the League. He would give his life for the League and their leader’s ideals and he knew that’s how it would end as he hit the ground, snatched out of the air by the blond child he’d barely seen once before months ago at the Yakuza base, and while the rest of that battle lasted barely more than a few minutes, Atsuhiro fell in and out of consciousness more times than he could count. He could not move no matter how hard he tried, but that was alright. If Shigaraki had gotten away, well. He couldn’t blame the kid for leaving him behind.

Atsuhiro let out a shaky breath and closed his eyes.

“Hurry! Go, get the Tartarus staff on site! Get...we need…....alive...”

If he couldn’t move anyway he wasn’t going to struggle—everyone was gone, surely, and the heroes were getting tended to, going by the muffled voices and sirens, and he’d accepted his death by now. As long as his sacrifice wasn’t for nothing, it would be alright.

He was roughly moved again, his mind fogging up more as a numb pain crawled up his side. His arm was restrained, locked down; his body was jostled until he was shoved roughly into the back of a cold vehicle onto a starkly-cold metal surface. Atsuhiro tried to open his eyes, but this was it for him. He let that darkness take him, hoping that the young boss, Spinner, and Dabi had gotten away.

His eye snapped open into quiet darkness, into what he guessed was a small and sterile room barely bigger than a closet. Machines hummed and chugged gently to his left and his right shoulder pressed against a cold concrete wall. He tried to speak but his throat was drier than a desert, leaving him sputtering and coughing until he’d caught his breath.

He couldn’t lift his right arm, a cuff had been attached to his wrist, his fake left eye and left mechanical arm had been removed, and he could only imagine what other types of straps were keeping him down on the bed that wasn’t very comfortable and they’d never given him any blankets or turned the heat up. He may as well exist in a dungeon and it wasn’t apparent that there were any guards near him at the moment.

With his wrist cuffed as it was, it blocked his hand from being unable to touch anything and he didn’t have any smart ideas to get out of this. Truthfully, he thought he was dead, but the straps were tight and deliberately made to keep him from moving his arm at all. The numbness in his hip and chest was almost too much but if he squeezed his eyes shut he almost couldn’t feel it. He felt a little lost and panicked without his left arm.

Remember, he thought. Remember. What got him into this place? A heist gone wrong? Did he steal something from a hero more high-profile than he’d expected? A more dastardly villain than he’d hoped? His work with the League often brought him to many unsuspecting places, but up until recently they’d been working on projects with...the Meta-Liberation Army.

Atsuhiro opened his eye. There’d been a war. That’s right, yes. He’d watched the boss get away, but he couldn’t remember anything after being grabbed by that sunny-haired kid he’d thought they’d gotten rid of a long time ago.

A few minutes into trying to relax, Atsuhiro realized that an alarm was going off on the machine and only got louder and worse the more he suddenly panicked. He pulled against the restraints to no avail. His heart nearly lept out of his chest when the door flew open, the room flooding with a fleet of armed guards and heroes silhouetted black against the harsh white fluorescent lighting that spilled into the room.

“Wh— what?”

A strong hand grabbed his face and turned his head every possible direction, to which he objected loudly and wasn’t heard. The doctor who grabbed him turned him to face them, their gaze cool and steady, but unfocused. He heard whispers from the front of the room that maybe they should stick a muzzle on him like one of their other prisoners, but the doctor handling him waved them away.

Atsuhiro was poked and prodded. “Please, come on. Take me to dinner before you start doing that. I’m /starving/.”

“We both know that’s not going to happen, Sako.” The doctor pressed their lips together, barely giving him so much as a look as they hummed, tapped a pen against their lips, and started to scribble on a clipboard. “Prisoner is awake, far too alert, and begging for food. I’d say we’ve done a good job here.”

“Fuck— what? Prisoner?” Atsuhiro struggled again. “At least tell me where the fuck I am!” Sharp pains in his side would have crumpled him if he didn’t have the restraints tied over his chest.

The doctor turned their back to him. “Prisoner is starting to panic. Sedate him."

They left in a hurry, coat a flurry of fabric behind them lime a cape, and Atsuhiro noticed the lines of drips going into his arm. He struggled more, but when what he assumed was an intern leaned down over a tray of medication he suddenly felt faint.

Before he fainted, Atsuhiro watched a fuzzy guard wave at him.

No, no, no, he thought. No. He couldn’t go out like this again. His eye closed however, and darkness claimed him once more when the door shut tightly and he fell into a fitful doze.

"Sako Atsuhiro."

His whole body tingled as he lifted his head. He felt like his mind was rapidly being overwhelmed by the sharp lights, solid metal room, and his arm held at a strange angle, while his body lagged behind him as if trapped in syrup. He had been given only enough pain medication to sit up and talk, but it made his mind fuzzy and he squinted against the harsh white lights of the room and the spotlights angled directly at him. Restraints kept him firmly against the chair, so he was unable to escape. He couldn't if he tried.

Atsuhiro cleared his throat, squinting. "Yes. Yes that's...that’s my name. How can I help you? Besides giving away all of our best secrets, of course."

The man who spoke to him seemed as nondescript as the next guy. Tall, short brown hair, quite a friendly face, business casual. Definitely not the kind of person who would be the main character in a show. A stack of papers sat under his hand. "It's just me in here."

"Okay? And the two hundred people recording this conversation?"

"I just want to talk."

"Well we certainly are! How's life treating you?"

"That's irrelevant. Sako, we have you listed for numerous crimes such as theft, destruction of property, child endangerment, involvement with the League of Villains and the Meta-Liberation Army, just to make a few. Just recently you were caught attempting to land an attack on our heroes.

"I don't really know what to say to that?”

The man hummed. "I understand. We’ll be keeping an eye on you, of course. You have a hip replacement and reconstruction scheduled soon. I’ll be visiting every few days.”

Atsuhiro resisted rolling his eyes. “Please, why are you telling me all of this.”

“Why not? You can’t escape, you can’t move.”

“I see. You know, it’s polite to at least tell someone your name? You seem to know me /quite/ well.”

The man pressed his lips together. He spent a moment writing down a few of his own notes. “I guess you can call me Tsukauchi.”

Atsuhiro blinked, mulling it over. He’d never heard of that name before. “Okay. Why are you bothering to fix me up?”

“The marble that you compressed was lost at the scene so there wasn’t a way to even attempt to assess what you’d lost.” Tsukauchi shrugged. “We obviously need you alive, which I’m sure you already know?” He raised an eyebrow and Atsuhiro pouted. “All prisoners at Tartarus receive /some/ kind of care. We aren’t heartless villains.”

“Yeah, and you use that care to keep us alive and trapped here and for what?”

“Sir, you were involved in committing mass murder.”

“Pah!” Atsuhiro straightened his shoulders. “So let me guess. Keeping me alive here is a worse punishment than death?”

“If that’s how you would like to see it.” Tsukauchi wasn’t looking at him, but seemed to be quite a good listener. “My time here is short today, but I’ll be back again shortly.”

“I look forward to it.” Atsuhiro gave the man his sweetest smile. Tsukauchi stared at him with a peculiar look, then looked down to gather up his notes.

He left silently. Guards crept out of shadows Atsuhiro hadn’t even realized were there and he was being dragged from the stage again. He couldn’t walk, oh no. He could barely /sit up/ and so he was roughly thrown into a wheelchair, the quirk-neutralizing cuff around his arm was adjusted, and straps tightened around his chest and legs.

The doctor who he’d seen numerous times by now and who he assumed had performed the surgery on him pushed his wheelchair along. They went down long passages, each holding cell specially designed to the needs and quirks of those they held. Atsuhiro’s own holding cell was only the basic one; cold, dry, with solid metal plates and a single bed. Because of the neutralizing cuff on his wrist, he wasn’t able to compress himself, and even if he was, there was a second cuff that held his hand at a specific angle and had a cage around it to leave him unable to touch anything. Without his right arm, he’d never be able to get it off on his own. Not unless he pulled some crazy gymnastics, which just weren’t possible with his injuries.

Apparently he was to be getting a slight upgrade to a different wing once his injuries had healed, but they gave a severe estimate of at least six weeks and an incomprehensible amount of physical therapy thereafter—if they deemed that necessary. After all, he was alive, and that’s really all they needed to question him.

Along the way, some of the captured prisoners gave him looks if they were able to look out of the windows on their doors or restrained in tight places facing the hallways for quicker analysis by guards and inspectors. Atsuhiro did not look at any of them.

#MHA #bnha #bnha spoilers #mr compress

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weshallc · 3 years

Text

This is so exciting, can’t wait to see what happens next! (No, I honestly do forget)

Berns Night (Revisited) 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Call the Midwife AU (Crown Jewels, everyone but Paddy and Bernie at Mount Busby)

Chapter Three: OF MICE AND MEN

“The best laid schemes o’ Mice an’ Men. Gang aft agley. An’ lea’e us nought but grief an’ pain. For promis’d joy!” To A Mouse by Robert Burns 1785.

“Liars and Lovers Combine Tonight, We’re Gonna Make A Scene.” The Captain by Biffy Clyro 2009.

The largest reception room at Mount Busby Farm would have once been very grand, with Queen Anne furniture and Regency coffee tables. The only thing that remained unchanged was that the original fireplace still gave up warmth and light provided by nature, and the windows let in the light from the same star constellations and the same moon.

The Two Loves preferred antique furniture of a later period and in their 80s comfort was paramount. The room was stocked with love seats, chesterfields, recliners. bean bags, generous cushions, and a rather charming gold settee that suspiciously looked pre-war. Just no one was sure which war. Everyone mocked it, but everyone fought to sit on it as it was very comfy. Patsy often talked about replacing it, but Delia wouldn’t hear of it. “You don’t throw your memories out with the rubbish and there are more memories than just ours hidden within these cushions, Cariad.” That was always the end of it.

The most current occupants of that particular settee to be making memories were Tim Turner and Lucille Anderson. Phyllis looked over at the awkward teen, who was no longer as awkward as he had once been. He sat comfortably chatting to his companion, both of them laughing at intervals. Lucille often finishing Tim’s sentences or him proclaiming, yep that’s it or knew you’d get it when they appeared to reach a level of understanding. Of course, when she asked the student nurse about her new friendship, she would just reply, brushing the older nurse off. “Oh, he is a dear boy; He makes me laugh.”

He was certainly doing that from where Matron Crane was sitting on a leather tan Whitworth dining chair, probably by Frank Hudson. Years of heavy lifting before the introduction of patient hoists and transfer boards had taken their toll on the matron’s back. It was why she had found herself in a more managerial role much earlier than she would have planned. She looked at Student Nurse Anderson and thought maybe the NHS was in more tender capable hands than the shitstirrers would have them believe.

“I am wondering if we should start,” youth minister Tom Hereward was on his feet. “I am not sure how long baby will sleep in a strange house.”

“I have been called many things in my time, but not sure strange is one of them,” laughed Delia.

“Oh, I have Deals, it’s fine,” reassured Patsy.

Tom turned pink. Trixie leaned over to him, “They are joking,” and sat back onto the giant purple pouffe she was sharing with Valerie. “I know, I live here. I have to put up with it all the time.”

“So. Erm who is in charge, who has the most authority here.” Tom was still trying to create some sense of order.

“Well, Julia is the vicar,” chirped in Bobby, trying to offer her husband some support.

“But this is not the church,” Rev Julia responded with a warm smile.

“Another shock there then, it’s all coming out tonight, Patsy.” Delia couldn’t help herself when she had an audience and a bottle of Prosecco was being passed round.

“Matron Crane is on the council,” Lucille reminded everyone.

“No, I don’t think that matters lass, it’s not a council matter.” Phyllis shook her head.

“Well, someone needs to take the lead,” Tom said with a hint of irritation.

“I will! On the authority that I am a young woman on her only night off of the week,” struck up Val, “but I have agreed to come here and discuss plans for Bernie’s birthday instead of having two for one sex on the beach.”

“It’s a cocktail, and its happy hour in the Fourteen Teacups on a Tuesday,” Trixie interpreted for everyone.

“That’s ambitious having a happy hour in the Teacups, isn’t it?” said Fred, who had managed to wedge himself into a deep red Chesterfield.

“Yeah, apparently Ursula gives you the right change, that’s why they call it happy hour,” Tim smirked.

“As I am representing the Crown. I will continue,” said Val and she did, “we want to put on a Burns Night for Bernie’s birthday like in the old days. Now Tim has told us Paddy is half Scottish.”

“Why isn’t he here?” asked Bobby.

“Well, he said it would look suspicious if he left Bernie on her tod behind the bar on a Tuesday night,” Vi explained sitting on a scarlet love seat next to Fred.

“Yep, in case our two Tuesday night regulars rush the bar at once,” snorted Val.

“I think it’s more that it would look suspicious if he actually just left Bernie alone for five minutes,” Trixie corrected.

Lucille felt Tim squirm in the seat beside her. She knew he thought the world of Bernie, but didn’t like to hear her relationship with his father discussed in public. This was inevitable being a small village with one pub, one church and two of the village's most popular inhabitants linked to both. She tried to ease his tension.

“I think it’s lovely, just shows as my grandma used to say there may be snow on the roof, but there is still fire in the grate.”

As everyone surrendered to laughter, Matron shared a smile with the vicar, both of them confirming Lucille might be familiar with the saying, but maybe not its meaning.

Delia was the first to keep a straight face, “But they are only bairns, wait until they are mine and Pats age then the fire may need a little bit of stoking.”

“Yes, Deals, but remember we have never required the use of a poker.”

Val swiftly continued, “Paddy doesn’t wish to be involved.”

“Why?” Reggie asked, perched on his wooden stool.

Val motioned towards Tim, who was still recovering from the last topic of conversation.

“Because it would look ridiculous, his words not mine.” Tim continued, “and I quote, Wilf had the works, I would look like I was trying to pull a stunt to impress Bernie by looking like I was dressing in drag and taking the piss.”

Tim looked at his knees, and Lucille gave one a quick squeeze. She knew this wasn’t easy for him.

Everyone else also looked at their knees. The mood was solemn.

“We can all understand Paddy’s reasons.” There were a couple of nods and sighs in response. “But we aren’t putting up with any of that nonsense,” Val added with a grin.

This was met with a very large and unanimous cheer.

“Well, I’ve already looked up the Turner tartan,” Trixie handed an iPad over to Patsy via Val.

“That’s very smart,” approved the artist.

“Sorry I hate to throw a spanner in the works, but how are we going to afford all this?” butt in a pensive Vi.

“We’ve already thought of that,” grinned Delia, ”Mount Busby will cover the cost of the costume.”

“That’s very generous,” sniffed Evie, who had nearly dozed off in a leather recliner.

“Not really,” explained Patsy. “I have a friend that works for Kilts 4 U and they are very interested in looking into the possibility of making an alpaca lined sporran.”

This was news to Reggie who followed anything relating to his charges with great interest, “What’s a sporran?”

“It’s where he keeps his spare change,” Fred enlightened, or at least tried to.

“It’s the little purse that men wear at the front of the kilt, Reggie,” Violet elaborated. He seemed reassured by this.

“So anyway, in return for a few samples,” Patsy continued, “my friend will be happy to hire out the full regalia for the evening.”

“It’s not long now until Burns Night have you got some sort of prototype ready?” quizzed Evie.

“Lady K is working on them as we speak. She loves nothing better than fiddling with a bit of alpaca wool,” Delia replied gleefully.

“Lady K?” Phyllis queried.

“Yes, she is very creative,” reassured Trixie.

“I don’t doubt it, Trixie, but she is one of Bernie’s clients. What if the lass sees what she is up too”

“Don’t fret Phyllis,” Patsy interjected, “I find that Antonia is much less forgetful when she has an occupation to challenge her and I am certain she won’t let the cat out of its proverbial bag.”

Jack sat on the floor accidently banged his head against the fire surround he was leaning against, “Can’t imagine Berns thinking; oh look Lady K is sticking bits of alpaca wool to a man’s bag he hangs in front of his todger. That must be something to do with Paddy and my birthday”

Vi was quick to admonish Jack, but when even Tom started to laugh, she decided to let it go.

“What about the little knifey thing they keep in their sock that he stabs the Haggis with?” Fred was beginning to get excited.

“Sgian dubh,” corrected Vi.

“All part of the traditional dress,” Patsy added a tone to her voice to reassure everyone that she had thought of everything.

“So that’s the gear sorted. Me and Reggie are in charge of the beer. What else?” Fred’s eyes were wide, thinking they actually might be able to pull this off.

“Well, myself and Evie have created a menu, pretty much on the lines of what we used to do in Wilf’s day.” Violet opened a small notebook and put on her reading glasses.

Clearing her throat she read, “Cock-a-leekie soup, Scottish salmon and tattie scones or scotch egg for starters.”

“Cock a what?” shouted up Jack.

“Chicken and vegetable soup to you, young man. There will be a just vegetable option too.” Violet’s voice began to take on the air it adopted when addressing an audience. “Then we have the Haggis or vegan Haggis, neeps and tatties and a whisky sauce.”

“What about those that might not wish to partake in the Haggis?” Tom asked nervously, as he might.

Evie spoke up before Vi could respond. “There is always the Fourteen Teacups for the likes of those that don’t wish to have Haggis. It’s a Burns Night. If you don’t want Haggis, then stay at home and order in a pizza.”

“What’s for pudding?” Bobby struck up, squeezing her husband’s hand.

“Cranachan which is raspberries, cream, oats and whisky, or Clootie pudding with whisky sauce or whisky ice cream or a Scottish cheese board with oatcakes.”

Murmurs of approval were aimed in Violet’s direction.

“That’s a lot of whisky?” Lucille remarked.

Violet agreed, “Yes, we need just a house whisky for everyone for the toasts Val, I will leave that to you, but you need to pay the piper with a good quality malt.”

Silence broke out in the previously buzzing, over occupied living room.

“Piper!” Several people groaned at once.

Fred, who was not going to let anything get in the way of this Burn’s Night declared, “Look, we will just have to bung on a recording.” Turning to Tim and Jack, he said, “You lads look up the Red Hot Chilli Pipers on your phones.”

Tim reached for his phone, swiping the picture of Lucille and him with Alpaca Colin. But Lucille touched his hand, making him hesitate.

“I don’t think that would be very suitable, Mr Buckle going to all this trouble with such a delicious menu and Mr Turner all dressed up in the finest regalia and then having some squeaky din coming out of an iPhone.”

“Your right lass, it just won’t do,” supported Phyllis.

“Well, does anyone know a piper?” Fred replied wearily.

“Surely we can find a professional one online?” contributed Julia

“A professional piper that’s free on Burn’s Night at this late notice,” chided Phyllis.

“I know a piper.”

The voice came from the back of the room. Everyone turned to look at the slight dark-haired woman sat on a dining chair. “Well, I think we all do.”

“Do we, Jane?” Julia asked.

“Yes, the busker that stands outside the town hall in Appleby Thornton.”

Everyone started talking at once;

“I only go into town every second Tuesday to get my hair done.”

“Same here I only go through if I have a doctor’s appointment.”

“Well, it’s the cost of the parking isn’t it, it’s free at Tweaven Retail Park and more shops.”

“You can get it on t’internet delivered to your door.”

“I haven’t been since Marks and Spencers closed.”

“Debenhams is closing next week such a shame, that shops older than me, always been a department store in Appleby Thornton.”

“It was one of the first in the country to have a lift, you know.”

Jane cleared her throat. “There are a lot of good things about Appleby Thornton that are not always obvious.”

“Here, here!” chimed in Val, “there is still a Primark.”

“Oh well, let’s be grateful for small mercies,” stung back Trixie.

Much to Delia’s disappointment, Val bit her lip. The ex-nurse and market gardener loved a full house. She cherished her quiet times with Patsy too, but she was the more sociable of the pair. The farm was large enough for Patsy to have her office and art studio and not be disturbed while Delia fussed the alpacas with Reggie. Trixie moving in had been Patsy’s scheme, but Delia was the one who had benefited most from their new project, even if she would never let their new employee know she was a project.

Delia enjoyed listening to Trixie’s anecdotes and gossip. She felt reconnected with a world that was moving so fast. The Two Loves were business women and technology hadn’t passed them by. It was the music, the celebrities, the trashy telly that Patsy despised and Delia loved that made having Trixie and her friends around delight Delia.

Delia’s carer probably wasn’t as up-to-date with pop culture as Trixie and her friend. Val was now a frequent visitor to Mount Busby, as she and their new lodger had struck up quite a friendship. Nurse Bernie always looked a bit behind the door when the other two were in full flow about some reality TV show.

But since Trixie had moved in, Nurse made Delia’s blood pressure check the last visit on her rounds and she drank tea, sitting and chatting with Trixie. Bernie didn’t need to watch Love Island. She had her own romantic paradise in Poplar-on-Tweaven and Delia couldn’t be more happy for her.

Val had bitten her lip, her new friend was still a bit of an enigma to her. She did know Trixie might talk as if she had been born with a silver spoon in her mouth, but in the last few months she had gleaned enough to know that spoon had been tarnished sometime ago. So in spite of all her bravado, Trixie was as familiar with Poundland as she was with Prada.

It was Julia who cut through the chatter. “I believe I am familiar with the young man you are referring to. He has a small dog with him if I am right?”

“Yes, Reverend.” Jane was beginning to believe she had dreamt the piper and maybe also Appleby Thornton.

“He’s rather good, as I remember.”

Jane was beaming as she nodded.

“So problem solved,” Fred rubbed his hands together with glee, “tot of whisky, a bowl of water for the pooch, bob’s your uncle, sorted”

“No, it certainly is not.” Trixie’s tone caused everyone to alter their gaze, “this man is a professional musician surely, if he has a regular spot he has a license. I am sure Chummy is well acquainted with the gentleman and his story. We can ask her.”

Inspector Noakes had been unable to attend the meeting because of work commitments, and Peter’s Tuesday evenings were spent running a youth football team that Jack and Timothy had both enjoyed being a part of. Alas, Tim had become too rangy and prone to injury, and Jack had become too lazy and prone to chips.

Trixie continued, “He deserves an appropriate wage for his efforts.” She turned to Val. “I believe the Crown has an entertainments licence.”

Val nodded and smiled reassuringly at her friend, “Paddy does, leave it with me and I will also make sure he and the mut are fed and provided with transport both ways.”

Trixie relaxed and shared a smile with the aromatherapist sitting at the back of the room. “Do you know his name?”

“Kevin.”

Fred let out a huge sigh. “So we are all sorted then?”

“It would appear so,” replied Lucille, grimacing at Tim.

“Apart from Dad.” groaned Tim.

Followed by an echo of sighs.

“Leave your dad to me, Chick.” winked Val.

#call the midwife #berns night revisited #january 2020 seems like a lifetime ago #hope it has a happy ending #hate those angsty slow burn au fics

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uniformbravo · 3 years

Text

having a full on existential crisis over an episode of anime i watched tonight

it all started with big time rush

in 2009 a sitcom called big time rush aired for the first time on nickelodeon; it was about a group of four teenaged boys from minnesota who move to hollywood under a famous producer to become his next big boy band sensation. a simple premise, launched into unprecedented success, resulting in four seasons of musical shenanigans, three full music albums, and three big concert tours, including international shows. the band, both fictional and real life, featured four attractive young men by the names of kendall, james, carlos, and logan. they quickly gained a fan base of mostly teenage girls, which resulted in online spaces created for the purpose of sharing their passion, and as is common in such online communities, this certainly involved fanfiction- lots of it.

enter me, a teen in high school who loved to write fanfiction. my big time journey began the day my younger sister decided to put on the show big time rush in the living room, where i sat at the family computer typing away. the noise caught my attention, and i got sucked into the episode. there was a boy wearing a dress on the screen. i became interested.

i watched more of the show. i typed its name into the search bar on the website fanfiction dot net. i had a friend at school who shared my interest in fanfiction, particularly of the slash variety. i introduced her to this new show i had been watching. she shared a fanfic she had enjoyed immensely with me. we dragged each other into the world of big time rush fanfiction reading and writing.

it took over my life; i lived and breathed big time rush. i began posting my own stories to fanfiction dot net. i received positive feedback; i met people. i made friends- two people in particular who became very close friends. we communicated through ffn’s private messaging system, then through email. we talked every day, we wrote stories for and with each other, we exchanged phone numbers. it was one of these friends who introduced me to the website called tumblr, where fellow fans of our beloved big time rush gathered and talked about it- a community.

it was a slow start- this website was new and unfamiliar to me- but eventually i got the hang of things and settled into my niche. i had fun, gained followers, met even more people. tumblr was a place not only for sharing one singular interest, but for accumulating all of your various interests and celebrating them in one place. it was through this aspect that i first learned of the up and coming band known as one direction.

they had released their first smash hit single and everyone was talking about it. i was wary, far too loyal to my beloved big time rush- but eventually i started to feel left out and in an effort to feel included, i decided to take the plunge and see what this “1d” was all about. it was intimidating, though- there was so much information, and no apparent beginner’s guide to tell me where to start. this drove me to making a post calling for a “one direction buddy” to take this role, to introduce me to all the most important aspects of this band. and my call was answered.

enter my wonderful friend cam, a follower of mine at the time. they were into both big time rush and one direction and were eager to provide me with all the information needed to get into 1d. while ultimately this venture didn’t amount to anything, as i lost interest in becoming a fan, my friendship with cam persisted and we grew very close. even as time went on and big time rush faded into the background to be replaced with newer, fresher interests, and our paths as fellow fandom members split, we kept in contact and remained friends. years and years of fandoms, years and years of friendship.

in the midst of the tenth year, cam developed a new interest, in a sport called ice hockey. as is tradition, they shared their passion with me, showing me their favorite team, highlighting their favorite members. we watched a game together. personally, i’ve never been one for sports, but i am quite into anime, which consists of many genres, including the “sports” genre. one in particular that i’ve enjoyed immensely in the past is the volleyball anime, haikyuu!!. this anime devotes a lot of time to explaining and depicting the sport in a way that makes it easy for any viewer to understand the rules and inner workings of volleyball. it’s exciting. it’s the first time i’ve ever even adjacently been invested in a sport. one could even call it a gateway into the world of sports.

all this to say, when i watched that game of ice hockey with cam, the same parts of my brain that loved haikyuu!! lit up and in a classic display of my specific brand of interest, i found myself yearning for the epic highs and lows of ice hockey, but in an animated format. an animated format originating in japan. a japanese animation. an anime. my curiosity burned a hole in my brain that resulted in a combination of the google search bar and the words, “hockey anime”.

to my disappointment, i found nothing- at least, not to the degree i was hoping. there is an upcoming anime, slated to air in the fall 2021 anime season, about a group of girls who form an ice hockey team together- as it is an original project rather than an adaptation, it remains to be seen whether the anime will fall into the category of “sports anime,” or if indeed it will lean much more closely to the “moe” genre. the latter is not what i had in mind during that particular search.

adding the anime called “pride of orange” to my “plan to watch” list on myanimelist dot com, i moved onto the next result: an article about an early 2010’s anime i had never heard of before. while not about the sport i was looking for, it featured a character whose signature weapon was a field hockey stick. it wasn’t even the right sport. it was a weak, insignificant link, but all was not lost.

i happen to have an affinity for watching anime i happen upon completely by random and know little to nothing about; i found the movie “anthem of the heart” purely coincidentally, when i searched the name “jun” as part of some research for one of my original characters and discovered that it was the main character of said movie, which i then watched and ended up enjoying quite a lot. another time, when i was at best buy one day i happened upon a dvd on their dedicated anime shelf for a movie called “hana and alice”, which i had never heard of before. i liked the box art, so i took a picture of it to remember the title and watched it on my own later that week; it became one of my favorite movies.

with these and other similar experiences in mind, i saved the anime in my “plan to watch” list, and, later that same week, began my watch of “sket dance.”

it’s a school comedy anime, one of my favorite genres, so it’s no surprise that after overcoming the initial skepticism i carry into every new show i watch it quickly became my new fixation. not an obsession, but something i was pleasantly surprised to find consistently enjoyable. the characters are fun, the humor is tight and fresh, and the stories are unexpectedly touching at the right moments. everything i like to see.

which brings us to tonight. the culmination of this ten plus year string of events and occurrences. getting into big time rush. joining tumblr. meeting cam. watching anime. searching for hockey anime.

i put down my apple(TM) pencil. i set my ipad aside. i downsized the ebook window i’d been referencing. i stretched; i was hungry and tired. i’d been rereading passages of various animorphs books all day. i needed a break. i needed to sit back with some food and an episode of my latest comfort watch, sket dance. it’d be nice to set the dramatic, tragic world of animorphs aside for something lighthearted and fun in its place.

well.

i sat down with my bowl of strawberries and played the episode. it finished. i watched another. this one broke the formula a bit, played with the art style. i was into it. the preview for the next episode was mysteriously blank, and short, stating only the title. it was intriguing. i’m down for the show to get a bit more serious for an episode, i thought. i’m down for some potential backstory for one of the main three. i’m ready.

i was not ready.

bruh.

b r u h .

next two episodes proceeded to take me out back and beat me to within an inch of my life, slowly at first and then all at once. barely made it out alive. questioning everything. how can a show, so silly and goofy, do that, to me. how could i let my guard down like that. how could i be so tricked, and deceived, and blindsided like this. i don’t know who to trust. i don’t know if i can trust again. whiplash so damaging, permanent. i thought i wanted answers. i thought i wanted to know backstory. i didn’t want this. i never wanted this. emptiness

how did it come to this, these twelve years of my life. had i known back then, would i have posted that fanfiction? would i have joined tumblr? would i have sook out a “one direction buddy”? a hollow husk of a person, i am left with only my thoughts to ponder this small history of mine. the things i could have done differently. the things others could have done differently. all these butterfly effect moments, adding up to what? culminating in what? it’s 2:26 am and i’m writing an essay on how shook i am over that episode instead of going to sleep. but i can’t just say nothing, you know? i need to put something out there, reach deep enough within myself to find the thing that’s still there, broken and huddled and tiny as it is. i need to feel some semblance of the self again. the me from before i watched this episode. the innocent version of myself, blissful in ignorance. it’s too late now.

that episode…………..was fucked up. that was seriously fucked up. im not okay bro they really just came in left field and slapped that in my face expecting me to get up and walk away just fine afterwards like No that isn’t how this Works y’all need to bundle some therapy sessions with ur episodes pullin that shit come ON

exhaustion is taking over the shock, i am simply tired now. i will fall asleep and when i wake up sket dance will be a happy fun show again with NO fucked up backstories ever Or Else. i’m fucking serious right now i’m gonna count to 3 and that shit better be retconned when i turn around,

screams

thank you

#tldr sket dance has some really fucked up shit in it & i wasn’t expecting it & im having a crisis #it was supposed to be funnie clown show not ouchie oof show #how did it end up like this #fuck. christ. what the fuck #retag later #ani blogging #me watchin this show: yea this is fun like idk if i see myself getting /invested/ invested but i’m enjoying myself nonetheless!#gets to That Episode: …../oh./ oh i /see./ we’re doing That Shit huh #*sound of me getting /invested/ invested*#just a neat lil show about funy jokes :)#wheeeeeeee

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kissmetae · 5 years

Text

Source of heat

x Taehyung

❧ AU: [Requested by anon] You and your boyfriend Taehyung were getting ready for a night of movies and being cozy in bed, but as summer was turning into autumn and the windows had been left open in the room all day it had become too cold for movies and Taehyung had a better idea...

|| SMUT | 3.6k | x reader | masterlist in bio ||

❧ Disclaimer: This is fiction. Actions and events in these stories are often exaggerated and to a certain degree unrealistic. Please have this in consideration when reading fiction, especially if it includes sexual content.

❧ Rating: MATURE || sexual content, unprotected sex, bad language

❧ Smut features: (In no particular order) Top!Tae, big dick, rough, fingering, touching each other, sex under the covers, dirty talk (a lot), squirting, pet names, “cum for me”, deep hard raw pounding, scratching, neck kissing and indirect hickeys, cumming inside and mentions of cock warming

❧ A/N: This gets very very dirty and shameless for reading pleasure~

Summer was slowly turning into autumn.

The air was getting cold and dry, the days shorter and it was the sweet spot for dressing either too warm or too cold and never hitting the perfect level of layers.

Too cold for shorts but too warm for sweaters? It made every outfit awkward! Sure wearing your boyfriend’s sweater over your summer dress was a look but no matter how many times he told you he wasn’t cold you could tell he was shivering by your side.

When you stepped out of the shower the mirror had fogged up almost fully. Your shower was just a quick fresh up one to get a little heat back into your body so it spoke a lot for how cold it actually was.

The two of you had opened the windows earlier this morning while you went out to air out the place but a rainstorm and strong cold wind from the sea later, you regretted it strongly.

The warm comfort of entering your apartment, fogging up glasses and welcoming you home was replaced by a shiver causing cold, but at least it wasn’t raining inside.

When you returned to the bedroom Taehyung was already submerged up to his nose under the covers, watching you rush towards your dresser wearing only a towel. The rain hit heavy against the now closed windows and you quickly pulled out a set of pajamas.

You stepped into the shorts and pulled them up under your towel before letting the towel fall to the floor and pulling the oversized T-shirt over your head.

“Hurry!” Taehyung yelled as you started to run towards your side of the bed to dive in under to covers with him.

Luckily it was already warmed up thanks to him and you quickly scooted closer to him to cling to his side. Your arm landed across his body, but from expecting fabric you were surprised when you felt your skin touch the bare skin of his chest.

“Where is your shirt?”

“It was too cold, I had to run for cover.” He pouted and pulled the covers up further on the tow of you. His arm found its place around your waist and he moved close enough to minimize all space between you and tangle your legs together.

Apparently the run for cover from the cold didn’t allow him to put on pants either.

“I’m wearing underwear.” He randomly pointed out as he rubbed his legs against yours.

It was still pretty early into the night so neither of you were rather sleepy. The initial plan had been to watch a movie in bed but the iPad was sadly forgotten in the living room.

“I forgot the iPad, I’ll sacrifice myself to get it.” You said and started to pull away from his embrace but his arms quickly tightened around you strongly.

“No!”

“But the movie…” You giggled.

“You’re warm, don’t go.” He said in a pout and nuzzled his face against you.

More specifically, right in-between your chest.

Your hand found the crown of his head and caressed is soothingly. Eventually he would probably let you go get it unless he went for it himself, but only after wrapping either you or himself in the covers to look like ET on a voyage to obtain advanced tech gadget from the living room.

A sneaky hand interrupted your amusing visual, brushing against your hip before sliding up along your side curve under your top against your skin to your waist.

He hummed softly.

“You must be so cold.” He whispered followed by a mischievous chuckle.

In some miraculous way his voice always appeared even deeper whenever he whispered.

“You’re the best source of heat I have, I’m all ok.” You said and cuddled him closer

“Doesn’t seem like it.”

“Hmm? What do you mean?”

He looked up as you from your chest level with a grin you recognized, haven seen it many times before.

“They’re hard.” He whispered even lower, as if a whisper would make it easier for him to point out.

You assumed he was talking about what his hand that was currently travelling further up your side was potentially reaching for.

His large soft hands were warm to the feel as it smoothed over your skin with a loving exploring touch. He reached the curve of the side of your right breast and squeezed it gently before landing his hand over the center of it, softly grabbing the hard nub between his index and middle.

His giggle didn’t have the feathery bubbly cling to it anymore; instead it was low and almost malicious sounding.

He tugged at your nipple gently, sending a sharp feeling through your body as if he just hit a switch for arousal to bloom.

“Taehyung?”

“Ssssh.”

His hand abandoned your breast and grabbed the hem of your T-shirt and started to pull it up with a struggle. To help you pushed yourself up on your elbow as his other hand reached over to help him yank it off of you.

A second later it was dismissed to the cold hard floors beneath the bed.

The cold air now exposed to your skin made you shiver slightly as your nipples reacted even more to the biting cold… already missing his touch.

Taehyung grabbed the edge of the cover that had slipped down and pulled it all the way up over your heads with a bubbly giggle. Accidently exposing his feet to the cold, making him quickly bend his knees to regain the warmth for them.

Clear by now, Taehyung was feeling playful and who were you to deny him?

Your bodies found each other’s closeness again, your hand pressing against his back and his landing back at your breast.

His thumb brushed softly over your nipple, touching and feeling… teasing.

Quickly you felt that the playtime was rather one-sided and moved your hand lower, following the curve of his spin and around over his hip to reach the front and hem of his underwear.

Unknowingly for you he was biting his lip hard in anticipation, begging inside for you to lower your hand just a little more and feel the true reason to why he changed his mind about the movie…

He inhaled sharply, flinching slightly as your hand smoothed over his fabric straining bulge.

“Someone else is hard too.”

“It’s not from the cold.” He whispered with a hint of pleasure in his voice.

Your hand soothingly palmed him, feeling the outline and curve of him as he grew harder.

Taehyung’s other hand had been relaxing between you up until now when he found your other nipple. His left hand abandoned your right breast and without warning slid down your abdomen and in under the hem of your shorts, his long fingers immediately finding their place between your lower lips and making you gasp as the brushed against your clit.

Your reaction spread a smirk across his face followed by another strained expression as you copied his move. Your hand moved up and in under the hem, skin against skin, hand against dick…

He exhaled shakily.

“Oh baby…” He mumbled, moving his fingers over your clit.

Your thighs pressed closer together as an automatic response to the sensation of pleasure, much to Taehyung’s disapproval.

His face was close enough for your nose tips to touch when he let out his breathy orders.

“Spread for me.”

Of course it was easier said than done when the touch was more teasing than pleasuring…

With a soft push Taehyung managed to get you on your back and quickly crawled over on top of you.

Your hand slipped out of his boxers but instead grabbed the hem of them, managing to pull the down half way over his erection, straining him even more.

He hated it.

His hands left you to yank his boxer down to his thighs, making his dick spring up. Sure it was dark under the covers, but you could still see him and how the shadows hit every curve and crease in the most flattering way.

On his knees between your thighs, back curved under the weight of the covers slightly he managed to get his underwear off with ease, stepping out with each knee and suddenly they were dismissed.

The sight of his nudity and erection was something that never failed to make your insides twist and turn. You wanted him, wanted to feel him… with your hands, lips, inside.

“Pull your knees close.” He directed, sounding stressed.

You followed his order and his hands reached for the hem of your shorts and pulled them up your thighs, over your knees and off down your legs. He quickly threw them out from under the covers and grabbed your ankles, pulling your legs back down to either side of him.

You could tell how he was getting further away from his bubbly cute side, his mischievous and lust filled persona taking over him more and more for each ticking second.

His confidence was lethal at this point, feeding off the need of you and the knowledge of your need for him.

He made himself comfortable, lying down against your abdomen, chest against chest, face against neck, hands on your waist and his dick grinding ever so gently against you.

“You’ll be really warm when I’m done with you…” he whispered, followed by a chuckle.

His soft exhale tickled the skin of your neck but the feeling was suddenly replaced by a soft sucking kiss of his lips, pulling away with an echoing smack under the covers.

Your hands rested against his lean back, holding onto whatever safety he could provide.

He was intimidating yet inviting, making you trust him but on edge.

The power he held was unfair like that, thus making it even more fun to act like a brat whenever he claimed his position on top. But tonight all you craved was his warmth…

His lips were sucking and kissing generously at your neck, thumbs rubbing by his hold of your waist, hips moving gently to remind you that this was only the start. Taehyung’s need was increasingly growing unbearable, his hold was growing tighter and suddenly his hands left your waist to firmly grab your breasts as he moaned against your neck.

“You’re so soft and warm and I’m not even in you yet.” He groaned, grinding harder.

He pushed himself up on strong arms, hovering above you with parted lips and a heavy exhale, hands pressing against the mattress on each side of you.

Was he aware of how attractive he looked when he was aroused?

His dark hair framed his face perfectly, dark brows giving contrast and insensitivity to each expression he made and his lips plump from giving you the marks you would wake up with the next morning.

“You’re all mine.”

Your hands reached up to his shoulders, pulling him back down on top of you and crashing your lips against his in a heated kiss.

He couldn’t hold it much longer.

He moaned softly against your lips and you almost felt pity for him.

What was he waiting for?

“Tell me how much you want me.” He pleaded.

“Tell me how wet I got you.”

With that he pushed himself down slightly, his hand reaching down between your bodies, between your thighs.

“Confess it all.”

He slid to fingers into your pussy gently, curling them as he pushed them in deeper.

A groan escaped you, turning Taehyung on even more.

“So wet.”

“You know I want every detail, I know how dirty your mouth can be.” He pushed his hand firmly against your lower, barely thrusting his fingers with the slight movement he did.

“Your touch, the sight of you… all of it Taehyung!” You giggled.

“It all makes me so fucking wet for you, so desperate to feel you-“

He bit his lip.

“So wet you’ll squirt for me?”

He was pushing it.

“That relies on how needy you are for me…”

“Don’t push it baby, remember last time?” He teased, well aware of the mess the two of you made.

He picked up his pace properly; pulling out his fingers and pushing them back in…

“Say it to my face.” He said.

“Say what?”

“How much you want me… you expression speaks for you, your body too but I want to hear you say it baby. Tell me how much you want me to fuck you right here, right now.”

His mischievous grin returned, making you more curious about what was going on in his mind.

He leaned closer to your ear, now whispering low while his fingers kept moving within.

“Don’t you want me to stretch that tight little pussy of yours?”

He kissed your jaw.

“Feel me when I claim you with my body.”

“Taehyung you’re driving me crazy…”

“Now you know how I feel… Say it.”

His fingers were brushing against your sweet spot, knowing exactly what they were doing.

Your hands tightened on his shoulders.

“Taehyung…” You moaned.

He was far beyond amused.

“I’m leaking precum… hurry.”

“Baby I want you, you know how bad I want you… Can’t you feel how much I’m leaking around your fingers right now?” You returned his grin. “How much my body is begging for you, I’ll go insane if you don’t show me some mercy… “

His nose brushed against your cheek.

“Just like that baby girl…”

“I need more…” You whimpered, wiggling slightly beneath him.

His heart was pounding in his chest.

Taehyung’s fingers slipped out of your soaked mess and his hand reached down to guide his dick.

Moving closer, he forced your thighs wider apart and dragged the tip of his cock up and down your slit, biting his lip hard enough you were worried he might pierce it.

With a shaky breathe he positioned himself by your entrance, pushing the tip in slightly and enough for him to return his hand to your waist.

Your hands found their place in his hair and with a deep grunt he pushed in half way, his size stretching your tightness around him.

“Fuck you’re so …”

He groaned.

“Tight.”

His hands moved to your hips, pushing them up slightly for ease as he pushed in deeper.

It felt heavenly … it looked heavenly.

The stretch only made you wetter around him and his strained face when he was pushing was so sexy…

“I should’ve fingered you more…” He groaned, gripping tight.

“It wouldn’t have made you smaller.”

He chuckled but got interrupted by his own whimper.

The sound was wet to say the least…

With a loud moan he pushed in all the way.

“Feel good baby?”

You nodded, expression reading utter bliss at the feeling of him stretching you to your limit.

“You look so good when you take me.”

He hooked his arms under your knees, pushing them closer to your body as he shifted his position slightly.

“I’ll make you feel so good princess…” He whispered, pulling out slightly and pushing back in.

With each he pulled out a little further, pushing back in harder to properly stretch you out for him before he dared going hard.

The sounds were filthy… but they turned you on so much, the wet slick sound of him sliding in and out…

His breathe grew heavier as he started thrusting.

Short moves, but fast and hard… knowing exactly what it would do to your body.

Taehyung hummed softly, followed by a deep groan in response to your high pitched whimpers.

It was hard to talk like this.

All your focus was on him.

The feeling of him pounding you hard, fucking you… Him inside of you and the heat and warmth your bodies created under the covers.

Your nails scratched his back gently, making him inhale sharply by your ear.

Like a punishment he thrusted extra hard.

“More.” He groaned.

You dug your nails deeper, not enough to pierce but enough for him to let out another groan.

“Fuck.”

The covers killed every echo, making each sound simply loud and clear, every moan, every breath, skin slapping against skin and your endless whimpers.

His pace slowed down slightly, giving his strong stamina a rest, pushing hard, pulling out almost fully and sliding back in passionately… properly making love to your body.

From ice cold to sweaty.

“Taehyung…”

“Hold on tighter baby.”

His hips repeatedly slammed against yours, pace quickening yet again and forcing you to hold on to him tight as you crumbled beneath him.

“Taehyung…” You moaned again, knowing exactly how much he loved hearing his own name from your lips.

“If you say it too much I’ll cum before you.” he panted, making you both chuckle.

He was so rough…

Your insides were screaming for more just as loud as they were screaming for mercy. His thick dick penetrating your tight pussy relentlessly… building a tightening feeling that quickly grew worse when he kept going fast and hard…

“Mmm…. Baby.” He groaned by your ear, followed by your name.

“Taehyung I-“ You grabbed his biceps tight.

“You’re cumming?” He smirked.

You shook your head.

“Then do it baby… you know I want it…”

He knew what it was.

You could feel how you leaked…

His hands gripped your thighs tight, going even faster and harder, earning deep load moans from you until he suddenly pulled out fully, sending your body into almost a type of shock with a whimper as you leaked heavily… becoming as wet as you could possibly get.

He slammed his dick back in hard, humming in pleasure.

“You look so fucking sexy when you squirt…”

“Now let’s make that pussy cum for being so good hmm?”

When he was this aroused he would grow so shameless…

His thrusts became more passionate, from fast, hard and short to fast and less short, if that made sense…

His body was pressed firm against yours and he was grunting with each thrust, sliding in a lot easier than before thanks to your wetness…

You could tell he was close and holding it…

His hand reached down to rub your clit, making every feeling become sensitive beyond control.

“Cum for me baby.”

You whimpered, grabbing him tighter.

“Cum for me!” He repeated, almost yelling and followed by a heavy groan and gritted teeth as he pounded into you again.

“I’m so fucking close baby” He whimpered.

His rubbing fingers were of course pushing you off the edge.

You squirmed, twisting slightly under him.

He went faster.

“I… I am close baby.” You panted, holding on tight to whatever you could cling on.

His hand left you and fell heavy against your side as he pushed himself closer, finding your lips with his and shutting up your moans.

His kisses were messy, hips moving in rhythm to your need as your nails scratched him deeper.

You lips parted as he hid his face by your neck, his safe space during sex.

“I’m going to cum…” He confessed, breathing heavily.

“Don’t hold it baby.” You begged.

“I want to cum with you.”

“You will!” Your breath hitched as he thrusted hard again.

Another thrust and your thighs were burning sore as you went numb.

“Taehyung!” You yelled, as if calling his name out would save you.

“Fuck.”

He groaned heavily, thrusting harder and setting off your orgasm from deep within, your lips falling open as you held your breathe only to a second later let out a loud whimper as you clenched tight around him.

“That’s it baby…” He groaned, humming in approval. “Clench around me baby.”

A moan by your ear and his thrusts got deep and hard, dropping the pace as he came. Each clench and deep push milking him dry of his release, filling your pussy with his cum.

The covers felt like a sauna.

You were breathing heavily when your muscles finally let go, arms and leg collapsing and head falling heavy against the bed, Taehyung’s weight heavy on top of you as he regained his breathe.

A minute or two passed when he finally looked up at you, shy compared to the minutes previous.

“Are you ok?”

You nodded.

With tired arms you pushed the covers off half way to let in the cooling air back in, making your nipples regain their perkiness.

Taehyung of course noticed and latched on gently with his mouth on one, more like a kiss than sucking it he pulled away softly.

His hair was clinging to his forehead slightly and you brushed it out of the way with your hand, earning a relaxed hum.

He was still aching inside.

Enjoying every soft clench your muscles gave him after the hard orgasm.

Shortly after he pushed himself back up and pulled out carefully, witnessing the mess you created between each other bodies in clear sight.

His tip left your tightness, leaving behind his release.

With a soft bounce he fell to the side next to you, pulling himself close to you and wrapping an arm around your waist.

His lips found your ear and sucked gently at the outer shell until you regained your soul.

You turned to your side in order to get closer to him, resting against his chest, your safe space.

His hand reached up to stroke your hair, moving it away from your face to behind your ear with his soothing touch.

“My angel.” He whispered sweetly, caressing you. “You’re so beautiful.”

“Our love can probably set a room on fire.” He laughed softly.

You cuddled up closer to him, his warmth and his soft skin.

He pulled the covers up to your waist and managed to slide his arm in under your head for you to sleep on so he could play with your hair more as he watched over you, soothing slow strokes through your strands, the sound of his breathing relaxing you even more.

“Can I sleep in you…?”

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thestraggletag · 4 years

Text

Indulgence!AU Part 4

Anons Prompted:

Indulgence AU: The doctor asks what the plan is once Belle is released - she cant live alone and will need help recovering.

Fuck Anon Prompt - How long has it been since you've slept?

Part One, Part Two and Part Three.

Things seemed to move quicker after she woke. Soon she was moved to a much larger and nicer room, with a window overlooking the gardens, a nicely-sized bathroom, a television and a nice-looking futon, which Nick appreciated beyond words.

Belle’s father arrived in the afternoon, obviously jetlagged and carrying his luggage. It was a testament to their mutual love and concern for Belle that both men managed to remain amicable as they exchanged information and decided on what to do short them. It was decided Nick would go home, shower and change and relieve Moe in the evening, so the older man could go home, unpack and rest. That way if Belle woke up at all she would not be alone.

It felt disconcerting to go back to his penthouse, almost uncomfortable. But taking a shower felt heavenly, as did eating something that was hot and required utensils. But he didn’t like being away from the hospital so in lieu of a much-needed nap Nick began researching plastic surgeons, taking note of a few names and sending an email to Tilly to get her to do further research on them. Finally he fished out a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and his bomber jacket, feeling like it would be more comfortable than his usual suits.

It felt inevitable to run into Mal, the woman giving him an appraising look he assumed was meant to be mocking and making a comment on how she��d thought his skin was allergic to anything other than silk, premium cotton and high-end wool. He told her to go fuck herself, being too tired for a better quip.

Belle was quietly talking with her father when he got back into her room, asking questions about their family back in Australia, smiling and looking like she wasn’t in pain. An act, since he knew her body aches and the stitches alternated between itching and burning. But her father seemed fooled by the act, smiling and going on and on about this gigantic Murray cod he’d caught in Menindee, enthusiastically showing her pictures as he told the story.

If his good mood was a bit soured by Nick’s arrival he barely let it show, instead focusing in saying goodbye to Belle, promising to return soon, once he got the chance to unpack and rest a bit.

“Don’t keep the flower shop closed on my account, you hear me? You can visit me on weekends, we can Facetime in the meantime. Mal brought my Ipad over and you got the one I gave you last Christmas.”

The man agreed and Nick felt a sudden and brief flare of anger. How easily the man agreed to not see his hospitalised child for the next six days. He reminded himself a moment later that Maurice French likely could not afford to keep his business closed or pay someone to replace him at it. He was a man of modest means that, to his credit, did not take anything from his now more successful daughter. A prideful man, likely his one redeeming quality. That and his honest, if imperfect, love for Belle.

They exchanged a brief greeting in passing before the old man went home, both very aware of the tiny Australian woman watching them like a hawk, willing them to be nice. As he unpacked his belongings- he’d brought a duffel bag with a few clothes and toiletries, as well as a satchel with his laptop and his glasses. He could feel Belle watching as he did all that, and it made him nervous and alert. Something was up.

“I think one of the nurses asked after you.” Her voice seemed light, but he knew there was a catch in there somewhere. “Well, at least I think she did. She asked where my fiancé was. It was lucky dad was in the bathroom.”

He froze, refusing to turn over and face her, muttering something about visiting hours and how it had been convenient to call himself her fiancé.

“Good, I’m glad.” It hurt for a second or two before she spoke again. “I was afraid we had gotten engaged and I had simply forgotten it.”

He wanted to tell her that he had tried, over and over, but had never managed to actually pop the question. But he refrained, finding out he did have a shred of dignity left after all.

“Did the doctor say something while I was out?”

There was nothing new. Things were looking good, and soon Belle would be able to drink and eat, albeit with a lot of restrictions. Mal had amused herself by arguing with a nurse as if she truly believed brandy had medicinal properties and would therefore be okay for Belle to start drinking again and she had even gotten to see a few of her friends, though Emma hadn’t been able to make it, given that she had a full day shift.

“She’s been keeping me informed about the case.”

The police had talked to Belle before he had left, looking like nothing of what she told them was news to them. Jefferson apparently had been their one big source of information so far and there was almost nothing Belle knew that he didn’t. He had told her beforehand of the fact they were keeping the whole business with Regina private, which she seemed to agree with wholeheartedly, given that it could complicate things for her father if it became known.

Though he had entertained the idea back at his penthouse of catching up on some emails and stuff with his laptop they ended up watching movies with it instead. Her new bed was spacious enough for two but he hadn’t dared to presume until Belle had patted the empty spot she’d made for him with a rather determined expression on her face.

By the time they reached the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark he was falling asleep, having kept his eyes shut since the nazis had first opened the ark. Belle carded her fingers through his hair, the gesture slow and brief, taking into account how stiff and weak her muscles were.

“How long has it been since you’ve slept? Properly, I mean, in a bed.”

He didn’t need to tell her what the answer was. She knew.

“I didn’t feel comfortable leaving.”

He had a sudden thought that perhaps she wasn’t asking just for his wellbeing. Maybe she was hoping he’d leave. Maybe she wanted some privacy or peace and quiet or a break from him and just didn’t know how to tell him.

“I asked the nurses to prepare you a bed in the futon. They do it in the pediatric unit, so a parent can stay overnight with the child. They seemed very unfazed at the notion of bending the rules for you, so I gather you pulled some strings.”

There was a familiar fondness in her tone, as well as a hint of exasperation. But surely if she’d gone through the trouble of making sure he could sleep comfortably in the room it meant she was not angling for him to leave.

“Thank you.”

They were soon interrupted by a nurse carrying a pillow and some blankets, efficiently making the futon into a bed before briefly checking in on Belle, mostly on her IV to see that it was not infected, before injecting the nightly dose of antibiotics into the cap before retiring. He changed into some lounge pants he’d brought with him, the sort that looked a bit like respectable pyjamas, and settled on the futon. It was a bit too firm, perhaps, and a wee bit small, but a vast improvement on the chair in the ICU. Unlike when he’d been at home it was easy to relax enough to slip into sleep, the sound of Belle’s breathing soothing.

“Good night Nick. I’m glad you’re here.”

He took a sudden deep breath, an icy thread of fear that had been wrapped around him without him noticing it unfurling and melting away. Belle wanted him here. He felt like weeping in relief.

“Good night.”

#rumbelle #rumbelle fic #Indulgence AU #Starbucks Series #Fuck Anon verse #Thestraggletag fanfiction

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jungle321jungle · 5 years

Text

Forms of Family 3

Part Three

Dee’s nerves were shot.

He had spent so much time- he didn’t even know how much anymore- talking to doctors who asked him the same questions so many times he wasn’t sure he knew the answer to them anymore.

On top of big general worry over Virgil’s condition, Patton would sporadically start to cry out of worry (in any other situation Dee would find it adorable), the twins were antsy as they began to rough house with one another, and finally Logan paced insistently as he kept trying to call their father (using Dee’s phone) to no avail.

Virgil was paler than he usually was, and his small chest heaved as he took short shallow breaths. His dark eyes were closed tightly, as if he was pain- and it only pained Dee more.

“Daddy?” Dee looked away from Virgil at the sound of Patton’s voice as he looked up to see the doctor had returned.

Patton climbed out his arms allowing him to stand slowly before he followed the doctor further away from the boys to speak.

“Based on the tests run and what you explained to us we believe he has a virus most likely caught for your other son, which led to an infection.”

Dee nodded digesting the information, “So he’ll be okay?”

“He will, but we will need to stay here for possibly a few days so he can have antibiotics, and monitoring. I’ll have him transferred out of the ER and into a more permanent room in a different part of the hospital.”

Weight fell from Dee’s chest as he gave a sigh of relief. No he didn’t want to be there longer, but long as Virgil was going to be okay that’s what mattered.

~~~~

Dee was thankful for his friends.

Despite his telling them that things were fine Brenda, Miranda, and more had come to offer well wishes. They brought him a change of clothes from the house and activities for the boys to do, and they had even offered to let the boys sleep in their homes as Dee was rooted to the spot.

Everyone was there to offer support.

Everyone but his husband.

“Daddy?” Patton asked pulling on his shirt.

Dee nodded and stood up and after making sure the other boys were fine he headed out the room to the bathroom.

He was gone for less than five minutes.

Less than five minutes.

And yet when he got back what did he find?

Virgil crying, Logan holding back a kicking and screaming Roman, and Remus- Remus had sunk his teeth into the nurses hand.

Dee was frozen and shock for half a moment until he noticed the nurse’s hand rise up to strike. But Dee’s fingers curled around her wrist before she could dare.

At his sudden appearance Remus released the woman and she wrenched her hand back. She tried to move back so Dee let her go.

“Do everyone a favor and watch your kids,” she snapped.

Dee held back a retort, he wasn’t going to piss off someone watching Virgil. “Remus apologize, now.”

Remus looked smug, but he gave an apology anyways, “Sorry.”

She hurried from the room then leaving Dee alone with his sons. The first thing he did was take a breath before he picked up Virgil and bounced him a few times to get the baby to calm down a bit. When he had quieted slightly he turned the others, “What happened?”

Logan let go of Roman, who then took up post beside Remus before he spoke. “Vee was crying and Remus wanted to help, but she came in and said we couldn’t touch him!”

“He’s our brother not hers!” Remus added in. “I know how to hold him! So she tried to pull me away, so I bit her! And she tried to hit me!”

“So I kicked her! Until Logan became a buzzkill!”

“She didn’t want you to touch him because it’s a matter of being sanitary, not familial ties,” Logan explained.

“So?”

“Yeah so?”

Dee gave a sigh, “You can’t bite people Remus. And I need you guys to listen to what the doctors and nurses say, alright? It’s what’s best for Virgil, okay?”

“Okay...”

“Fine... But if she’s mean to him, I’ll kick her again.”

Dee held back an eye roll (Logan didn’t), “Fine. Whatever, just sit and quiet down.”

“Fine parenting,” Logan muttered.

“Logan, I’m not in the mood.”

“Noted.”

~~~~

It took two nurses, one doctor‍, and his friend Miranda to pull him away from the hospital room. But the furthest he would go is the first floor to get a coffee.

“So glad I pried you from that room,” Miranda commented as they stepped out of the elevator onto their floor.

Dee sipped at his coffee, “Yeah, the bad coffee is totally worth it.”

She rolled her eyes and was quiet for a moment before she spoke, “Have you heard from...?”

Dee gave a sigh as his fingers involuntarily clenched and unclenched into fists. “No. I left half a million messages and sent twice that in texts... and I got nothing.”

Miranda paused in thought, before she stopped in her walk and turned to face him with a serious look. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but personally I think you’re better off without him.”

“Miranda I-”

“I’m not going to overstep more than that. But if you are still set on trying to contact him, maybe you could try using someone else’s phone? He might have you blocked.”

Dee opened and closed his mouth unsure of how to proceed, but she nodded slowly.

“If you need a phone feel free to use mine.”

He watched as she pulled out the device and held it out to him, but he shook his head and turned. He couldn’t be blocked... right?

“We should head back,” were the only words he could force out as he turned to walk the way they had come.

The walk back was silent, until he slid open the door and was greeted with the scene inside.

“I win!”

The shout came from Roman and Remus playing some game on their iPad in the corner. Apparently Remus had won whatever it was. Beside them Logan was nose deep in a book while Patton lay on the floor with a coloring book. It was a scene so normal he almost wished he could pick the whole thing up and drop it in his house. That Virgil would be healthy and things could be back to normal.

When he entered the room they all looked up at him, but he said nothing making his way back to Virgil.

“When can V come home?” Patton asked him.

Dee gave a sigh as he sat in his seat, “Hopefully soon Patt. Tomorrow or the day after.”

“That’s far away.”

“I know, but it’s to make sure Virgil is feeling his best, alright?”

“He needs to feel better faster then.”

Dee nodded, “I agree.”

~~~~

“Pacific.”

“Pacific. P-A-C-I-F-I-C. Pacific.”

“Paralysis.”

“Paralysis. P-A-R-A-L-Y-S-I-S. Paralysis. Come on give me something harder.”

“Fine, sorry, I thought we starting easy and building up. Um so... exasperation.”

“What’s the point?” Roman interjected. “Logan wins every year. He doesn’t need to practice. He’s the best speller! ...Er...”

“Speller. And why do you go to soccer practice then?” Logan asked him. “You guys won the last three games.”

“We don’t play soccer anymore,” Remus put in. “We’re gonna do karate.”

Dee sighed, “That’s not confirmed yet.”

“We can’t do karate?” Roman asked. God the kid sounded like Dee had done something terrible. He grimaced,

“I’m not saying that either. I need to look into some things first.”

“So that’s a yes?”

“It’s a maybe.”

"Maybes are yeses!"

Dee gave a sigh as Logan frowned, “They are not. Do- do you know the definition of both words?”

“It’s not a yes right now,” Patton threw in. “He has to talk to Dad first!”

Dee felt a pain in his chest as he gave the boy a smile, “E-exactly Patt.”

“What’s the next word again?” Logan asked changing the subject.

Dee nodded thankful for it, “Um... we were on exasperation.”

“Exasperation. R-O-M-A-N-A-N-D-R-E-M-U-S. Exasperation.”

Dee just shook his head, “I need a nap.”

~~~~

When the name flashed on his screen Dee swore his heart stopped beating.

His eyes flickered to his sons to find Logan watching him curiously. He gave a hard swallow as he grabbed his phone tightly and walked out into the hallway. The nothingness in his heart was suddenly replaced by a jackhammer as he finally answered the call.

“Hello?” His voice shaky, quiet, and weaker than he wanted it to be.

“You always take forever to pick up,” grunted the voice on the other side.

“Virgil he-”

“Where’s your watch?”

Dee felt himself deflate, “What?”

“Where’s you watch?” He asked again. “The one I gave you on our honeymoon? I need it.”

“What? W-why?”

“Does it matter? Where is it?”

“I don’t know. But why-”

“Of course,” there was a banging and shuffling on the other side. “You fucking lose everything. I already checked your side table and the safe, do you have any ideas on where it could be?”

“Virgil is in the hospital,” Dee stated bluntly. “He has been for two nights now.”

“What does that have to do with a watch?”

Dee gave a laugh of disbelief as his anger began to rise, “Nothing at all. But he’s your son too, so shouldn’t that be where your concern lie? With your son? Or with a fucking watch?”

“...Don’t swear around the kids.”

“Oh now you’re concerned?” Dee shouted. “You hate that I swear, but you can’t fucking come to the hospital see your son? What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Don’t raise your-“

“Don’t! Don't you even try to tell me what to do anymore. I’m done with you and all this bullshit. So listen up, you have two choices. You come here now and be with your children, or you get the fuck out of our lives and never contact us again.”

“You can’t do that.”

“Yes I can! I’m done lying to the boys! I’m done lying to myself! I gave you your choices. Come and be a father or get out of our lives.”

“Damien,” his voice was slow and angry, but Dee couldn’t bring himself to care.

“What?”

“You are aware that I pay for everything right?”

“...I guess you made your choice.”

“That’s not what I said.”

“If your money is more important that your children then you made your choice. So feel free to take your money with you. I’ll keep my kids.”

“Damien I-”

Dee cut him off by hanging up the phone. He stared down at it for a moment before he took a deep breath to stop the tears burning at his eyes.

“Dad?”

The soft call came from behind him and Dee turned to see Logan and the twins standing in the doorway. He opened and closed his mouth, but no words came out. He moved back into the room and sat in his chair before he felt small arms pull him into a hug.

He lost his battle against the tears as he hugged Roman back. There was a short pause before the other three joined and Dee held his children tightly to his chest.

“Daddy’s not coming back?” Patton asked quietly.

Dee forced himself to take a deep breath as he pulled back enough to look them all in the eye. “Our family is going to be a bit different now,” he started slowly. “But it’s okay. There’s many forms of families, and now ours is just us. But it’s okay, we’ll be okay. Can you guys trust me on that?”

Logan nodded and adjusted his glasses, “One hundred percent.”

“Good, I’m gonna need your help Logan.”

“You needed my help even when he was around.”

Dee smiled ignoring the way his tears still fell, “Glad I can count on you.”

“We thought he wasn’t coming back anyway,” Roman admitted.

Remus nodded solemnly, “Dad’s never been gone this long... Does he really not care anymore?”

“I’m sorry,” Dee told them both. “I want to think he does, but I don’t know. But I’ll be here for you guys regardless okay?”

Dee looked to Patton and it pained him to find tears in the young boy’s eyes. He pulled him close mumbling apologies as he was unsure what else to do. But Patton held him back saying that he loved him. And that was good enough.

Because even without him, they were still a family. And while some could try to cause rifts and difficulties to break them up, Dee would always be there for them as their father- as their dad who asked for nothing in return.

~~~~~

Thank you so much for reading!!!!

Part One • Part Two (1/2) • Part Two (2/2) • Part Three

#roman sanders #sanders sides #virgil sanders #ao3fic #patton sanders #logan sanders #deciet sanders #dad!deciet #dad!dee #dad!au #formsoffamily #kidfic #thingsssssssssss

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hubcapsleep2 · 4 years

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Next Year Innovative developments by Apple

Apple is without a doubt the most innovative company in the world at the present time. It is the business to which nearly others look for direction. Every time Apple reveals a forward thinking new design language or launches a new product, it creates ripples through the entire marketplace. Eventually, the whole industry is crafting products in Apple’s look and feel. However to say Apple is merely a trend-setter understates the business’s position seeing that probably the figurehead of invention in customer technology. Apple isn’t simply setting technology tendencies; Apple’s vision models precedents and starts motions that allow the tendencies to exist in the first place. As great as it must feel to be Apple in this situation - and as humbling since it must experience to be any of the many companies copying Apple at every switch - it’s not all sunlight and rainbows. You can claw your way to the top of a mountain, but there’s very little stable surface up there. One wrong step as well as your toppling back down the mountain, undoing years of the effort needed to get up there. I actually do not want to price cut Apple’s successes in 2018: Apple Pencil program for ipad device was a wanted addition; iOS 12 has provided new life to iPhones as previous as the 5S; Apple Watch Series 4 is literally saving lives; and that’s simply a few highlights. Searching back again, though, 2018 was a pretty tough year for Apple as certain missteps ended up impacting the company’s important thing. Within Apple’s most questionable techniques in 2018, there’s one I wanted to emphasize for an important reason: Without second-generation iPhone SE around the corner, it appears Apple has exited the spending budget flagship market. In reality, I will take it one step further: I am sure Apple won’t be launching any longer budget iPhones, and here is why. Apple’s product collection is certainly varied. The company generates revenue from services like iTunes and Apple Music to add-ons like AirPods and the Magic Key pad, from home entertainment devices like Apple Television 4K to personal computing gadgets just like the MacBook Pro. However sales for most of these aren’t that amazing (though Apple’s income most certainly are). It is essentially the iPhone that makes up about the majority of Apple’s revenue. Since its debut in 2007, iPhone has pushed Apple’s revenue to such incredible heights that the company has become the first trillion-dollar firm ever sold. With so much of Apple’s income riding on the game-changing gadget, you can wager there would be a significant drop in Apple’s revenue if people starting buying less iPhones. And that’s specifically what we are experiencing. Following a modest 4th quarter, revenue for Q12019 - which, to be clear, is comprised of October, November, and December, encompassing the holiday shopping season - was much lower than Apple originally expected. With the price of brand-new iPhones rising, revenue would’ve increased actually if unit sales experienced only remained constant, but there have been fewer iPhone units sold through the period. The implication is that demand has waned, or it’s possible there wasn’t very much demand for Apple’s expensive new iPhones in the first place. The first indicator of challenges was in 2017, the year iPhone X was released. At a starting cost 50 percent higher than the prior year’s baseline model, iPhone X unit product sales were reportedly toned although Apple’s revenue improved. How? Because even though Apple sold approximately the same quantity of products as the entire year before, the average cost of an iPhone had improved. When you sell the same number of products but mark up the price, you still see a bump in sales revenue.

Of course, it’s not merely the iPhone that is gotten more costly. Apple has raised selling prices across almost all of the organization’s portfolio. But with the iPhone driving revenue, the implication is this: In the event iPhone product sales continue being smooth or begin to fall, Apple will have to keep raising the price of the iPhone every year to maintain year-over-year revenue gains. As possible plainly see, it’s not really a coincidence Apple has made a decision to stop reporting iPhone unit sales publicly. Even if 2017 was an outlier, the start of new iPhones in the fall is supposed to give Apple a shot of income adrenaline in the final stretch out, allowing for a solid finish as the business crosses the monetary finish line. But also for the second 12 months in a row, that did not come up. Doesn’t it appear possible, if improbable, that increasing the prices for new iPhones has led to lower demand? In regards to a week ago, Apple CEO sent a document to shareholders. You can read the letter for yourself on Apple’s webpage, but it warns traders that Apple’s 1Q2019 revenue will be $9 billion less than was originally projected. The letter largely blames China’s overall economy for almost all the year-over-year iPhone revenue decline while also suggesting that buyers are still adapting to the extinction of carrier subsidies. In a recent interview Cook reiterated most of the same reasons to clarify lower-than-anticipated iPhone profits. Beyond slowed development in developing markets and the lack of subsidized pricing through service providers, Cook mentioned to iOS 12 and the $29 battery substitution program seeing that having encouraged users to keep their outdated iPhones rather than buying new ones. As you might recall, Apple began the battery alternative program in late 2017 in hope of hiding the smell of the battery hot debate, which had earned allegations of designed obsolescence. As indicated by Cook, many with old iPhones decided not to upgrade because they could get brand-new batteries for cheap. This would take away the functionality caps that Apple got imposed on them, fixing their iPhones to their former glory, especially when paired with iOS 12. In fact, Apple went to lengths to ensure that iOS 12 would make older iPhones faster, so Cook is most likely right in thinking the battery replacement program and iOS 12 factored into the weaker sales of 2018 iPhones. Nevertheless, Cook declared that complicated trade relationships between the US and China was eventually the largest factor. China represents a huge amount of untapped sales potential for Apple, so there’s probably some truth to that, too. You can observe the full interview in the video below if you would like to hear more of what Make has to say about it. Meanwhile, critics and analysts possess suggested poor iPhone sales certainly are a sign of market saturation; at this time, most people who would like an iPhone already have one, and that’s a hard hurdle to overcome, specifically with buyers modernizing much less frequently. It is also surprisingly possible that Apple valued the 2018 iPhones out from the developing markets the business claims to be targeting. After all, if you live in China and want to buy a new cell phone, will you buy an iPhone XS for $1,000 (¥6800) or more, or will you get the latest Vivo or Xiaomi Android mobile phone that’s manufactured locally and may do in essence whatever iPhone XS can do at a fraction of the price? And in addition, Cook mainly sidestepped the topic of ballooning iPhone prices - a condition that we have watched across most of Apple’s products for that matter - which has been one of the primary criticisms of brand-new iPhones. New Price Hikes Price boosts for the iPhone used to be pretty rare. Actually, after carriers stopped offering subsidized prices on cell phones, forcing us to start paying complete MSRP if we wanted to buy fresh iPhones, we're able to at least depend on a consistent starting price from year to year. That starting price used to be $649. With the discharge of iPhone 8 in 2017, it increased to $699, a frustrating increase, but it wasn’t too alarming. It had been only a $50 boost after generations of a consistent price, so many people gave Apple a pass. And also, also at the bigger price, iPhone 8 seemed really cheap compared to the $999 price tag on the brand new iPhone X. Yet apparently, the price increase for iPhone 7 place a precedent because in 2018, the purchase price jumped yet again. Matching the boost from iPhone 7 to iPhone 8, the 2018 iPhone collection started out at $749 for iPhone XR. You would argue that iPhone XR is a better device than iPhone 7 and justifies the excess $100, but value is subjective. Although some might say iPhone XR is worth its $749 beginning price, especially in comparison to Apple’s more premium models, many customers will fixate about how each new era of iPhone is more costly than the one before. And at this time, can you blame them? To make matters even more serious, as iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR were being unveiled on stage during Apple’s fall 2018 event, iPhone SE had been discontinued. So not merely are iPhones getting increasingly more expensive, but Apple has eliminated the only spending budget option we had. So if you’re seeking to get a new iPhone in 2019, there’s not much choice anymore. Buyers are mainly having to simply accept Apple’s higher starting price in the absence of a genuine budget iPhone. Naturally, customers and critics as well are getting more vocal within their demands an iPhone SE successor. Incredible Unpredicted Benefits Apple unveiled the iPhone SE , which stands for Particular Edition, in March 2016 at a special spring event. Both for consumers and the industry most importantly, iPhone SE was an extremely un-Apple device for Apple to release. The iPhone 6 had just jumped in proportions and received a completely new design from the prior generation. Then iPhone SE was released, featuring a smaller, compact form with its design practically indistinguishable from the previous-generation iPhone 5. A lot more surprising was the fact that iPhone SE particularly featured the majority of Apple’s up-to-date, flagship-level technologies regardless of the reduced starting price; for just $399, you have the same custom made A9 processor as iPhone 6S in addition to a 12 MP surveillance camera with 4K video recording and a bigger electric battery. Actually, the only significant short-cuts were having less 3D Touch and the use of first-generation TouchID instead of the faster second generation. But, once again, taking into consideration its low starting price (which eventually settled to $349), the iPhone SE offered uncharacteristically great value for something made by Apple. The problem was that iPhone SE did not become a top-selling iPhone. Throughout its life-span, its defining characteristic was that it provided an affordable point of access to the iOS ecosystem though it eventually gained relatively of a cult following among specific Apple fans. Obviously, after iPhone SE had been the baseline of the iPhone lineup for a couple of years, customers were prepared for the required refresh. Although iPhone SE offered an excellent cost-to-performance relation in 2016, a refresh would bridge the functionality gap that grew as iPhone SE’s A9 processor was followed and changed, first by the A10 Fusion chip in iPhone 7, then again by the A11 Bionic in the iPhone 8, iPhone 8 Plus, and iPhone X . Patiently Looking forward to Apple's New Product launches Sure enough, we heard that Apple was working on a fresh version of the budget iPhone. Details varied, however the iPhone SE successor - alleged to be called either iPhone SE 2 or iPhone X SE (with suffix and modifiers meticulously arranged)- seemed to have the same purpose as the initial, which was to be a compact, low-cost iPhone offering great efficiency and most of the latest features. Much of the disagreement encircling the naming method for the iPhone SE 2 was because of unclear stories as to whether the gadget would retain its iPhone 5-era style or whether it could embrace the new iPhone X aesthetic. Some customers insisted (or possibly hoped?) iPhone SE 2 would look like an iPhone X from the front with a nearly bezel-less, edge-to-edge display. These stories were mainly informed by supposed styles for display screen protectors and situations; if reputable, the implication was that iPhone SE 2 could have a bezel-much less, notched display related to iPhone X, iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR. Of training course, the notch would become one of the defining features for 2018 mobile phones overall as its was imitated by almost every smartphone manufacturer following the iPhone X debuted in late 2017; however, for Apple’s purposes, the notch only exists to accommodate biometric sensors for Apple’s proprietary FaceID. Therefore the implication was that iPhone SE 2 would feature FaceID although the high price of FaceID components managed to get an unlikely inclusion in any budget iPhone. Following these reviews, renders were made to show how the device might appear if it ended up being real. Assuming the case styles and resulting renders had been accurate, iPhone SE 2 would’ve been a really fascinating gadget, the lovechild of the bygone iPhone 5 and the more futuristic iPhone X. Provided Apple can keep production costs and, by expansion, the MSRP down, iPhone SE 2 could’ve easily outsold the original iPhone SE, possibly becoming a top seller just like the original iPhone SE never could. These weren’t just the pipe dreams of iPhone SE followers and anyone who wanted cheaper iPhones; reports from Apple’s very own suppliers all but verified programs for iPhone SE 2, offering estimates for possible production schedules and ship dates. In early August 2017, Wistron Corp. - a low-volume manufacturer based in Taiwan that Apple recruits when iPhone demand is high - was focusing on expanding its creation base to accommodate a fresh compact Apple smartphone, which many presumed to be an updated iPhone SE. After that came a tentative ship day: In late November 2017, Economic Daily News in Taiwan reported Apple had been eyeing a release time in the first half of 2018 for the iPhone SE 2, which would’ve been consistent with the spring release of the original iPhone SE. January 2018 brought another report of iPhone SE 2 launching in 2018. Shortly thereafter, there is a rumor iPhone SE 2 would include a glass back panel, suggesting the addition of the wireless charging features that the iPhone has had since 2017. Just simply because rumors pointed to Apple gearing up for the release of a next-generation iPhone SE, Ming-Chi Kuo, an analyst with KGI Securities who is known for predicting Apple’s products with uncanny accuracy, planted among the first seeds of doubt. In late January 2018, Kuo reported iPhone SE 2 had hardly any chance of being released because Apple had exhausted its resources on the three flagship models to be released in 2018. Of program, those three models ended up being iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR. However, rumors persisted - though at a slower pace - in spite of Kuo’s question. For instance, there have been specifications and other information on the iPhone SE 2 reported in April 2018. Regarding to these leaks, Apple designed to keep production costs (and, by expansion, the eventual retail cost) down by omitting the 3.5mm headphone jack and using iPhone 7’s A10 Fusion chip rather than the A11 Bionic chip used in iPhone 8 and iPhone X. For all intents and reasons, the axe was decisively dropped in July 2018 as BlueFin Research told MacRumors that Apple had nixed all plans to proceed with iPhone SE 2. We’ll probably never find out for sure whether iPhone SE 2 was ever in fact in the pipeline; however, actually if it was planned initially, it’s unlikely that we’ll ever get an iPhone SE 2 at all. It’s been four a few months since the release of the 2018 iPhones, a meeting that coincided with iPhone SE being taken off Apple’s lineup, which, in and of itself, allegedly happened because Apple retired its A9 processor. So apart from Apple quickly unloading the last iPhone SE models at a discounted $249 price, which took just a day, iPhone SE is fully gone from Apple’s catalog, and anyone waiting for a next-generation iPhone SE has little cause for hope. In the event that you ask me, the composing is on the wall: Apple won’t be making another budget iPhone. FORGET ABOUT Budget iPhone? Spending budget smartphones, or smartphones that cost roughly $300 or less, are pretty common currently. In some cases, these budget devices offer great bang for your buck. Some of the more recent notable for example the Moto G6 for $240, LG Stylo 4 for $250, Huawei Mate 20 Lite for $290, and, of course, the impressive Pocophone F1 for $299. If you have a tad more to spend, you can look for a used or refurbished Samsung Galaxy S8 for just barely over $300. Or you can get the new Nokia 7.1, an Android One gadget with the design and nearly all of the features that top-shelf Android flagships possess for the discount price of $350. I’m not sure where the phrase originated, but I totally agree: “Good cell phones are receiving cheap, and cheap cell phones are getting good.” Of course, you might’ve pointed out that the smartphones mentioned above are Android smartphones. How about iPhones? When carriers did away with subsidizing smartphones, we had to begin paying full retail price for new smartphones. Therefore Apple’s decision to create the iPhone SE was very timely: Instead of paying $649 or even more, you could purchase an iPhone for under $400 without making a ton of compromises. Suddenly, people who preferred iOS to Android had their own Pocophone. From September 2016 to its discontinuation in September 2018, iPhone SE was never a top-selling iPhones. Also at its peak, iPhone SE hardly ever accounted for more than 11 percent of iPhone sales as the third-best-selling iPhone, and just by a slim margin. Meanwhile, both iPhone 7 and iPhone 7 Plus almost tripled the product sales of iPhone SE during that period, accounting for 28.5 percent and 29.5 percent of iPhone sales, respectively. After September 2017, iPhone SE sales dropped substantially, remaining somewhere between 5.5 percent and 8 percent until the device was taken in fall 2018. Suppose you’re Tim Cook looking at these quantities. Everybody has been requesting a second-generation budget iPhone, but sales numbers present that when a lower-cost option is available, the majority of customers keep purchasing the more costly iPhones. If customers are willing to pay even more for high-end iPhones, does it make sense to produce a cheaper device that, at best, no more than one in ten consumers will be interested in buying? With some context, positioning the iPhone more as a luxury item starts to make sense. Like voting on a ballot, Apple’s customers have been casting their votes on higher-end iPhones, therefore we can’t really blame Apple for moving away from budget smartphones that do not sell well. If you’re miffed about the loss of life of iPhone SE 2, there are, actually, cheaper iPhones available for individuals on a budget. But you’re not likely to observe them in shops. Current Market Conditions Apple gave clients the lower-cost iPhone they’d always been asking for, but most of them decided not to buy it. Therefore if you’re Apple, do you produce a second generation knowing the first era didn’t sell well, or do you ditch the budget-iPhone idea altogether? It seems Apple chose the latter. However, it doesn’t eliminate from the fact that spending budget iPhones are already available, not to mention plentiful. Specifically, I’m discussing used iPhones on the market. The gray market refers to the buying and selling of used iPhones on the secondhand marketplace. It’s comprised of the many people selling their used devices after upgrading, which essentially produces an unofficial market of budget iPhones. Therefore all those listings for iPhone 6S, iPhone 7, and iPhone 8 on eBay, the Amazon Marketplace, solutions like Swappa, and yard-sale applications like LetGo will be the gray market for iPhones. Apple doesn’t need to spend money on R&D, sourcing parts, manufacturing, and distribution for a budget iPhone because we curently have access to all of the discounted iPhones we're able to ever need in the secondhand marketplace. And each year when new iPhones are released, millions even more iPhones will revitalize the secondhand market as users who update to new iPhones sell their aged ones. Plus, any post-2016 iPhone models in the gray market could have better specs than iPhone SE, and some of these used iPhones would be cheaper than investing in a new iPhone SE from Apple for $349. Quite simply, Apple doesn’t have to sell a budget iPhone because the current-generation iPhones purchased at complete retail cost today become budget iPhones as consumers utilize them and eventually sell them to on the gray marketplace if they upgrade. And more devices are listed on the gray marketplace every day, so as long as Apple is selling smartphones, the gray marketplace is a renewable resource for budget iPhones. Of training course, the gray market isn’t the only method to get an iPhone on the inexpensive. Depending about how you look at it, Apple actually offers new spending budget iPhone options each year. With the official unveiling of new iPhones every year, the MSRP of every preceding generation still in production is decreased. For instance, when iPhone 8, iPhone 8 Plus, and iPhone X were announced in the fall of 2017, iPhone 7 and iPhone 7 Plus became previous-generation gadgets, which warranted cost cuts. The iPhone SE was still in production when iPhone 7 got its price cut, if you wanted a fresh iPhone but didn’t want to invest $699 or even more for iPhone 8 or iPhone X, you could choose iPhone SE from $349, iPhone 6S from $449, or iPhone 7 from $549. Though $349 isn’t exactly chump switch, it’s certainly more palatable than iPhone X’s thousand-dollar starting cost. With iPhone SE discontinued, the least expensive iPhone available is iPhone 7 for $449, meaning the cheapest iPhone on the market is $100 more than last year. To be fair, iPhone 7 was an excellent device at release, and it’s still a compelling option today, specifically for the cost. Though it was divisive as Apple’s first iPhone without the apparently requisite 3.5mm headphone jack, iPhone 7 is otherwise a full-presented flagship. But if you’re searching for a new iPhone on a budget, which would you rather buy: a 2016 iPhone for $449 or an iPhone SE 2 with the most recent A12 Bionic processor chip for $100 less? Regarding iPhone SE 2 not materializing, maybe understanding what could’ve been is what makes this so disappointing for some. Even though the info suggests a limited audience for spending budget iPhones, there will always be situations where a low-cost iPhone with current-generation efficiency hits the sweet spot. Where Should Apple Go From Here? It’s a great time to be a lover of tech, particularly mobile tech as spending budget and mid-range flagships are slaying in the Android smartphone marketplace. Though priced higher than a $349 iPhone, the OnePlus 6T can be a prime example of how exactly to offer flagship-level specs, design, and performance at a reduced cost. For better or worse, Apple appears to have evacuated the spending budget smartphone sector after just one attempt. Granted, Apple hasn't actually catered to budget-minded customers with almost all the company’s equipment starting at $1,000 or even more and a shrinking amount of gadgets, like iPods and iPads, priced lower than that. That is why it was so unusual for Apple to produce a budget iPhone to begin with. The problem is that it seems Apple is now trying to close a door that probably the business never should’ve opened in the first place. After all, when you’re offering this inexpensive iPhone on the lineup, all of the flagship iPhones seem that much more expensive by comparison. Whether there’s a new iPhone SE later on, the prices attached to Apple’s items are climbing. In many markets, Apple is coming dangerously close to pricing the iPhone along with most of Apple’s other items out of reach. For customers who can’t (or don’t want to) pay such exorbitant prices, the actual fact that Apple offered inexpensive options previously but no longer offers those options today will certainly leave a bad taste in people’s mouths, almost like biting into a rotten apple. Honestly, I am hoping I’m wrong about this, but if Apple really wants to curb the decline in iPhone demand and for sales to resume an upward trajectory, one of two things will need to happen, and sooner rather than later. Apple needs to either lower the margins on iPhones to make them less expensive (or even just less expensive), or there must be a new budget option so customers at least have the illusion of preference. Because as the numbers have shown, most buyers choose the premium iPhones in any case, but if Apple puts a budget model on the table, at least they won’t feel just like they’re having to pay out the ever-growing Apple tax. Apple’s current pricing framework gives consumers only high- and higher-priced models to pick from. But it seems buyers are needs to recognize there’s still an added option, which is definitely to save themselves the difficulty, and possibly some buyer’s remorse, by not buying new iPhones at all.

#smartphones #social media

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get-your-fics · 5 years

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Violent Delights - Chapter Ten

This is Not an Exit

Summary: Bruce Wayne is addicted to a lot of things to distract from his dark urges, but his addiction to you might only increase them.

Pairing: dark!Bruce Wayne x reader

Series warnings: Violence, language, smut, rape/non-con, stalking, kidnapping, underage drinking, drug use, torture, abuse

CHAPTER NINE

I left the bathroom when a trio of girls walked in giggling. They stopped in their tracks when they saw me, their smiles disappearing from their faces and glares replacing the lighthearted looks in their eyes. I rolled my eyes and pushed past them without a word, straightening my blazer as I returned to the club. You were no where to be found, and I assumed you had called a taxi or your town car to take you home. I ducked out of the club. I didn’t want Tommy pestering me about the sweltering knot forming on my head or where you had gone to. This way, he could just conclude that me and you had left early to go back to my place together.

You didn’t tell anyone of our little encounter in the bathroom. Not your friends, not your mom, not the cops. I figured it was because you knew it was of no use, and for that, you were a very smart girl. I had the GCPD in my pocket, and who would believe you if you tried to claim that billionaire Bruce Wayne had attempted to rape you with absolutely no proof? I waited until it was dark out. Night slipped over the city like a curtain that had been pulled over a window. It blocked out all light, plunging the city into inky blackness. There were no stars in the sky; only heavy, gray clouds that foreboded something sinister. The air was thick with tension and crackled with electricity, like one spark was all it would take for a bolt of lightning to split the sky open. A storm was brewing, but I didn’t think anyone in Gotham saw it coming. Certainly not you.

But I did. I would be the one to set it into motion.

I observed you on my iPad for a long time. Eventually, you left with a purse slung over your shoulder and your Jimmy Choos clicking against the wooden floor. It was then I decided to strike. I drove in my Cadillac and used my fake apartment pass to get through the turnstile. I didn’t want there to be a single trace that I had been here tonight. I rode the elevator up and picked the lock on your door, as normal. Your penthouse looked generally the same. Nothing out of place, everything neat and tidy and spotless.

Something on the kitchen counter caught my eye. Pushed far away in the very corner was a block of culinary knives. I walked over to it and tugged on my black, leather gloves before pulling one out. The sound the knife made as I unsheathed it was pleasing to my ears. I held it up so it caught the white light of the moon streaming in through the windows. The sharp curve of the stainless steel looked like it glowed as it reflected the light. The smooth handle felt cold and good in my grip. It looked untouched, which made sense, because I doubt you had time to cook for yourself. You were always rushing from place to place. The knife reminded me of the blade I had used all those months ago when I had killed Ra’s. I briefly thought about what it would be like to slide this one along your flesh, making little incisions and watching the blood drip out of them like ichor.

I heard a key turning in the lock, and I pressed myself against the cabinets. I lurked in the shadows as I watched you step into the penthouse, closing and locking the door behind you. I stared at you with a predatory gaze, licking my lips, as you kicked off your heels and dropped your bag carelessly to the floor. You raked your hands through your hair and let out a shaky breath. You always looked so tired and exhausted these days. When I take care of you, I’ll make sure you never feel this exasperated ever again.

I waited until you were far enough away from the door so you couldn’t slip out without me getting to you first. Then, I stepped out of the shadows. “Hello, gorgeous.”

Your head snapped in my direction, and when you realized it was me, your eyes went round with fear, just as I had expected they would. Perfect. “Bruce? What... what are you doing here?” You were already stuttering. “How did you get into my penthouse?”

“Easy. I picked the lock.” I leaned my shoulder against the wall and inspected the tip of the knife I still held in my hand. “Pretty simple. You need better security, gorgeous.”

You stood frozen, your muscles seizing up with terror as you spied the knife in my hand. It was like your feet were glued to the floor. “What are you doing with that?”

“Oh, this?” I raised it. “I’m hoping I won’t have to use this.” I traced the curved edge with the tip of my gloved finger, my lips curling into a smirk. “But I don’t think I’ll have to. I have other ways of making you do what I want.”

“Just... put it down.” You attempted to remain calm. “We can talk. You don’t have to hurt anyone.”

My lips twisted into a frown. I didn’t like how composed and levelheaded you were being, how much you were trying to keep it together. I would much rather watch you splinter and crack under the pressure, watch your blood boil and your temper rage. I wanted to see you scream and fight and try to claw your way out of my grasp. It would be much more entertaining. This was just... pathetic.

I chuckled, dark and low. You twitched as the sound reverberated off of the tall walls. “You think I came here to talk?” I chose that moment to start closing the distance between us, taking a step forward. “You think I broke into your penthouse at night, grabbed a knife, and waited to get you all by yourself just so we could have an open, friendly discussion?” I was right in front of you now, within arm’s reach. “No, you’re much too smart a girl for that. You know what I want.”

I could see the fear in your eyes, but it was laced with something. Defiance, perhaps. Maybe bravery. Though any bravery you could have at this point was a foolish attempt at denial. “Why don’t you tell me then?”

I placed the blade flat under your chin, tilting your head up to meet my gaze. “I want you.” You swallowed roughly, the tip of the knife inching closer to piercing your skin. “All I ever wanted to begin with was you. You just had to make everything so goddamn difficult.”

You noticed I was advancing on you and took a hesitant step back. “I’m not yours, Bruce. I don’t belong to you.” You furrowed your brow, and I could see the fire flaring within. “I’m not some piece of property that you can come and stake your claim on.”

I dropped the arm holding the knife to my side. “Oh, I knew you would say that. It became pretty apparent to me after our last run-in that if I wanted you, I would have to take you by force.” My footsteps echoed as I stalked towards you, running the knife over the back of the white, leather couch. “I’ve done a lot of bad things in the past couple of weeks. I wasn’t too proud of them at first, but now I see they were all necessary. Everything that I’ve done, I’ve done so that I could have you.”

Your face contorted with apprehension and horror. “What did you do?” You backed up until your shoulders hit the wall behind you. “Please, Bruce, tell me. What did you do?”

“Well, I followed you around town, snuck into your penthouse a few times, stole a pair of panties, bugged the place,” I gestured vaguely to the cameras I had stashed around your home, “got rid of someone who was in my way.” I flicked the tip of the knife with my gloved fingers.

The bottom fell out from under you. “Oh, my God.” Your knees buckled, and if it weren’t for the wall behind you, you would’ve fallen to the floor. “You killed Brant.” You clasped a hand over your mouth, your eyes brimming with tears.

“You know, it’s funny. I thought he was your boyfriend!” I laughed as I waved the knife in the air. “I beat myself up about it, but then I realized he was just another charity case wasting your time. He was holding you back; they all were. All you’re meant to do is be with me.” I pointed the knife at my chest as I finished my statement.

You shook your head. “You’re crazy.” Your whole body was trembling. “You’re insane.”

My smile vanished from my face. “Don’t you see, gorgeous?” I held my arms wide open in supplication. “I’m in love with you.”

“Your sick obsession with manipulating girls isn’t love, Bruce,” you seethed through gritted teeth, tears falling down your cheeks.

“Oh, gorgeous, there isn’t anyone else.” I walked forward until you were trapped between me and the wall. “You’re the only one I would go to this great a length for.” I reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “You’re the only one I want.”

You jabbed your finger in the direction of the door. “Get out!” you hissed. “Get out before I call the cops!”

I shook my head at you, laughing. “We both know you’re not calling the cops.” My grip on the handle of the knife tightened until my knuckles turned white.

You pressed both of your hands against my shoulders and shoved me back far enough so you could slide out from between me and the wall. You were quick running over to the door, I had to admit, but I was quicker. Your fingertips just barely grazed the doorknob before I latched onto your arm. I yanked you backwards, and an earsplitting shriek erupted from your throat.

“Go ahead, scream. We both know that no one will hear you. There’s no one coming for you.” I dragged you backwards. You thrashed against me, digging your heels into the floor to try and stop me, but it was of no use. I was stronger. “There’s no escape, no exit, no way out. There’s only me.”

I scooped you up in my arms and threw you onto the couch. You barely had time to push yourself up on the cushions before I was on top of you. I enveloped your body with mine, and you went into fight mode. You scratched at me with your nails and kicked me with your bare feet. I easily overpowered you and pinned you back against the couch.

“Fine,” I sighed, “if that’s how you’re going to be, then I’ll have to restrain you.”

I flipped you over so you were laying on your stomach. I pinned your legs down with my knees and wrenched your arms behind your back. I held your wrists in one hand as I reached for my belt buckle with the other. You screamed at the top of your lungs and sobbed until your face was blotchy. I would have found it annoying if I didn’t enjoy it so much. You wriggled your hips as you tried to get away from me and ended up brushing your ass against my growing erection. I growled and made quick work of my belt.

“Be patient, gorgeous. I’ll give you everything you want.” I wrapped my belt around your wrists and secured it in placed. I turned you back over so you were lying flat on your back. I crashed my lips against yours. The kiss was a mix of teeth and lips and tongue, but it was hot and fiery with passion. I could taste the salt from your tears on my tongue, and as it slipped into your mouth, you bit down.

Your teeth sunk into my tongue as an act of rebellion, and I cried out. I pulled back, the tang of metal flooding my mouth, and narrowed my eyes at you. You stilled underneath me when I pressed the tip of the knife against your collarbone. You held your breath as I traced gentle circles over your skin. I imagined what it would be like to press down just a little more and draw blood, to hear your voice rise with panic as your blood trickled out of the wound like strawberry lemonade. But I couldn’t, at least not now. I didn’t want to leave any blood behind for anyone to find.

Instead, I dragged the blade down your body until I reached the hem of the dress you were wearing. I tore your dress up the middle with a deafening rip until it fell away, revealing your exposed breasts and the lacy thong you were wearing. I could feel my cock twitching in my pants as my gaze raked over your form. I tossed the knife to the floor with a metallic clang. Your breath hitched in your throat as I cupped your breast in one hand. I stared, fascinated, as I started softly kneading the flesh. I wish I could feel your warm skin against my bare hand, but I was too afraid of leaving fingerprints all over your penthouse.

“I can make it feel good for you, you know.” I ran my thumb over your hardening peak and appreciated the blush that crept up your cheeks. “This can be just as much for your pleasure as it is for mine.” I tweaked your nipple, grinning as it earned a yip from you.

I moved my hands down your body to the underwear concealing the region between your legs. I hooked my thumbs under the elastic band and let it snap back against your skin. You jolted, and I snickered at your reaction. I grabbed your underwear again and pulled it down your legs.

“No, please!” You squirmed. “Don’t do this!”

I brought your panties to my nose and inhaled your scent. I could smell your arousal clinging to the article of clothing. “Are you sure about that, gorgeous?” I easily took hold of your flailing legs, halting your movements. “Are you sure you don’t want this as much as I do?”

“No!” You tried to sit up, but with your arms tied behind your back, it was impossible. “Let me go, you sadistic fuck!”

I laughed again and spread your legs for me. I gazed down at your pink slit, glistening with slick. “You’re so pretty.” I settled my head between your thighs. “Let’s see if you taste just as good.”

I stuck my tongue out and licked a stripe up the length of your pussy. A shudder ran through you, and you bit your bottom lip to keep your noises of pleasure in. You bucked your hips, though whether it was to get away from me or out of want, I couldn’t tell. Either way, I grabbed your hips and held you still. I swiped my tongue through your folds, groaning as your juices coated my tastebuds. The taste of you was more addictive than anything I had ever known. I curled my tongue around your clit, and your shouts of pain slowly morphed into needy mewls. I took your clit into my mouth and sucked, listening as breathy moans spilled from your lips.

I let it go with an obscene pop and pulled away from your pussy. “You taste so good, gorgeous.” I brought two gloved fingers to your entrance and traced light circles. “Do you think you can cum on my fingers for me?”

Somewhere, through your aroused state, the wheels in your brain were still turning. “Stop! This isn’t what I...” You trailed off as I pushed my fingers into you. Your brow furrowed as your cunt stretched to accommodate my fingers, but when I wrapped my lips around your clit, you relaxed around me. I pumped my fingers into you at the same pace I licked your clit, and I could feel your walls tensing. Your pussy clenched around my fingers as you came, and you threw your head back, a high-pitched moan escaping your throat. I took my fingers out of you and lapped up your juices like I was starving as you came down from your high.

I sat back on my heels and stared down at your ruined form. Your body was flushed shades of red and coated in a thin sheen of sweat. Your chest heaved up and down, and tears slipped down your cheeks as embarrassment creeped in at the reality of what you had just done. What I had just made you do. My cock was painfully restrained against the confines of my pants at this point. I needed to be inside of you, buried deep inside of you, at this very moment.

“I want to fuck you,” I leaned over you and pushed some sweaty strands of hair out of your face, “but not here.” I stood up and threw your naked body over my shoulder. “Let’s go to your room.” You began protesting again as I carried you up the stairs to the second floor of your penthouse. “No!” you yelled, kicking your legs. “Please, stop!”

I raised a hand and swatted your ass with an audible smack. You fell silent, and I could feel wet dots staining the back of my shirt from your tears. I swung the door to your bedroom open and crossed the distance to your bed in a couple of steps. I tossed you onto the bed, your body bouncing on the mattress. I pounced on top of you, reaching for the zipper of my pants and pulling it down. You stared in fright as I pushed my pants and boxers over my hips in one fell swoop, freeing my hard cock. I ran my hand up and down my length as I kneed your legs apart. Your thighs were still slick from the orgasm I had just given you.

“You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this moment, gorgeous.” I lined up with your entrance. “This is everything I’ve ever dreamed of. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted.”

You cried as I pushed into you. You were wet enough that I was able to get in halfway before your walls tightened around me. “God, you’re soaked.” I pulled back only to thrust in again. This time, your pussy gave way, and I buried myself to the hilt in you. “I wonder would it would be like to go in dry.” I snapped my hips against yours, earning a squeak from you. “I guess we’ll have to try that next time.”

Your eyes widened with terror at the prospect of a next time. My lips curled into a smirk as I set a rough pace. You still didn’t know what you were in for, did you? I lifted your leg so I pounded into you at a deeper angle, hitting all the right spots in you. “Fuck, you feel so good,” I groaned. The way your pussy felt around my cock as I sheathed myself inside of you was just so perfect, so utterly, inarguably right. “You were meant for me, meant for me to take you like this,” I managed between grunts.

You were at a loss for words. All you could do was stare up at me, your eyes frozen wide with dread and your lips parted. I anchored myself on my hand pressed into the mattress beside you and fell into a trance as I watched your tits bounce as I fucked you. The sounds of the bed springs complaining and skin slapping against skin filled my ears, and the air smelled like sweat and sex and your shampoo and whatever expensive perfume you had sprayed on yourself before you had left your penthouse. It was completely intoxicating, and I lost myself in it.

“Are you still going to deny it to yourself, gorgeous?” Beads of perspiration rolled down my brow. “Or are you going to admit that you need me just as much as I need you?”

You squeezed your eyes shut before opening them again. “Never...” Your voice sounded strained.

I drew my thick brows together, and the corners of my mouth tugged downwards into a frown. This time, you didn’t look away from me, your eyes burning with unrelenting fury and pride. Pride that you had caused me the tiniest bit of dissatisfaction. Your gaze scalded me, and I decided that you looked far too pleased and comfortable for my liking. I took it upon myself to change that.

I wrapped my fingers around your throat and squeezed down. The triumphant look in your eyes quickly faded away, replaced with panic instead. Your lips opened and closed like a fish out of water as you gasped for air. Your breathing was short and shallow. I barred my teeth as I rammed into you, using just enough strength to restrict your airway without killing you. I could feel the knot twisting in my gut starting to unravel.

“You’re mine!” My voice was a low, deadly rumble like thunder in a storm, a harbinger of what’s to come. “No one else can have you!”

I leaned down and sank my teeth into the flesh around your clavicle. You let out a piercing shriek, and I felt your walls flutter around me. Your pussy constricted my cock as you came, triggering my own orgasm. My hips stalled as I painted your walls with my seed. I gave one more squeeze to your throat, and your body went limp underneath me as you fell unconscious.

I pumped into you a few more times, slowing down my pace, to make sure I had gotten all of my cum out. Then, I pulled out of you and detached my teeth from your collarbone. I looked down to see ruby red blood springing from the bite mark I had made in your flesh. It started to trickle down your skin in zig zag patterns, and before it could stain the white sheets, my tongue was on you. I drank all of the sweet, savory drops dribbling out of the wound like I was drinking from the fountain of youth itself. I ran my tongue over the pulse on your neck. It was weak and faint, but it was there, and I could feel all the fresh blood pumping through your veins. I wanted to bite you again, to spring a leak and drain you until I was bathed in red, but I stopped myself.

When the bite on your clavicle stopped bleeding, I leaned back, taking in your unconscious form beneath me. Your eyes were half open and glazed over. Your breathing was slow, but even. I swiped my mouth with the back of my hand, and looked down to see your blood staining my skin. I stared, enchanted, at the contrast of the crimson hue against my pale skin. It brought out my own blue and purple veins lining my flesh, pushing blood. Red. It was so much more than that to me now.

You were so much more to me now.

ACT TWO

#bruce wayne #bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne imagine #bruce wayne x you #gotham #gotham imagine #gotham fanfic #gotham fanfiction #dark!bruce wayne #dark!fic #playboy!bruce wayne

134 notes · View notes

gramsugar42 · 4 years

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Apple Launches Planned for Next Season

Apple is considered to be the most innovative enterprise in the globe at the moment. It’s the company to which nearly all others search for guidance. When Apple reveals a forward thinking new design vocabulary or launches a fresh product, it generates ripples through the entire marketplace. Suddenly, the entire industry is crafting items in Apple’s concept. But to state Apple is merely a trend-setter understates the organization’s position while arguably the figurehead of creativity in consumer engineering. Apple isn’t just setting technology developments; Apple’s vision sets precedents and begins actions that allow the tendencies to exist to begin with. As impressive as it must experience to be Apple in this situation - and as humbling as it must experience to be the many businesses copying Apple at every change - it’s not absolutely all sunshine and rainbows. You can claw your way to the top of a mountain, but there’s very little stable ground up there. One incorrect step as well as your toppling back off the mountain, undoing years of the effort needed to get up there. We do not want to discount Apple’s successes in 2018: Apple Pencil program for ipad from apple was a beautiful addition; iOS 12 has given new life to iPhones as aged as the 5S; Apple Watch Series 4 is literally saving lives; and that’s simply a few highlights. Searching back again, though, 2018 was a pretty tough year for Apple as certain missteps ended up impacting the company’s bottom line. Within Apple’s most dubious moves in 2018, there’s one I needed to point out for a significant purpose: Without second-generation iPhone SE around the corner, it appears Apple has exited the spending budget flagship market. In fact, I will consider it one step further: I’m convinced Apple won’t be launching any more budget iPhones, and here’s why. Apple’s products portfolio is definitely varied. The company generates revenue from solutions like iTunes and Apple Music to add-ons like AirPods and the Magic Keyboard, from home entertainment devices like Apple TV 4K to personal processing gadgets like the MacBook Pro. Nevertheless sales for the majority of these are not that amazing (though Apple’s profit margins certainly are). It’s definitely the iPhone that accounts for nearly all Apple’s revenue. Since its debut in 2007, iPhone has pushed Apple’s income to such amazing heights that the company has become the first trillion-dollar business in history. With so a lot of Apple’s income riding on the game-changing device, you can wager there would be a significant drop in Apple’s income if people starting buying less iPhones. And that’s precisely what we’re discovering. Following a modest fourth quarter, revenue for Q12019 - which, to be clear, is made up of October, November, and December, encompassing the holiday shopping season - was much lower than Apple traditionally forecasted. With the cost of fresh iPhones rising, income would’ve increased even if unit sales acquired only remained steady, but there were fewer iPhone units sold through the period. The implication can be that demand offers waned, or it’s feasible there wasn’t very much demand for Apple’s costly new iPhones to begin with. The earliest indicator of difficulties was in 2017, the year iPhone X premiered. At a starting cost 50 percent greater than the previous year’s baseline model, iPhone X unit product sales were reportedly smooth although Apple’s revenue increased. Just how? Because even though Apple sold roughly the same quantity of units as the entire year before, the average cost of an iPhone had improved. When you sell the same quantity of products but mark up the purchase price, you still see a bump in revenue. Of program, it’s not simply the iPhone that is gotten more expensive. Apple has raised prices across practically all the company’s portfolio. But with the iPhone driving earnings, the implication is certainly this: If iPhone sales and profits continue being smooth or start to fall, Apple will need to keep raising the price of the iPhone each year to maintain year-over-year revenue gains. As you can plainly see, it’s not a coincidence Apple has decided to stop reporting iPhone unit sales publicly. Even if 2017 was an outlier, the start of new iPhones in the fall is meant to give Apple a go of income adrenaline in the ultimate stretch out, allowing for a solid finish as the business crosses the monetary finish line. But also for the second year in a row, that did not happen. Doesn’t it seem reasonable, if improbable, that increasing the prices for new iPhones has resulted in lower demand? About a week ago, Apple CEO delivered a document to shareholders. You can read the document for yourself on Apple’s website, but it warns traders that Apple’s 1Q2019 revenue will be $9 billion less than was originally projected. The letter largely blames China’s industry for almost all the year-over-year iPhone income drop while also indicating that buyers are still adapting to the termination of carrier subsidies. In a recent talk Cook explained many of the same concerns to explain lower-than-anticipated iPhone revenues. Beyond slowed growth in developing marketplaces and the lack of subsidized prices through carriers, Cook pointed to iOS 12 and the $29 battery replacement program as having encouraged users to hold their current iPhones rather than paying for new ones. As you may remember, Apple launched the battery substitute program in late 2017 in wish of hiding the stench of the battery pack hot debate, which had earned claims of intended obsolescence. As stated by Cook, many with old iPhones didn't upgrade because they could get fresh batteries for inexpensive. This would remove the functionality caps that Apple experienced imposed on them, mending their iPhones with their past glory, especially when paired with iOS 12. Actually, Apple visited lengths to make sure that iOS 12 would make old iPhones faster, so Make is probably correct in thinking the electric battery substitute program and iOS 12 factored in to the weaker sales of 2018 iPhones. Nevertheless, Cook asserted that challenging trade relationships between the US and China was eventually the largest factor. China represents a ton of untapped sales potential for Apple, so there’s probably some truth compared to that, too. You can observe the entire interview in the video below if you want to hear more of what Cook must say about it. In the mean time, critics and analysts possess suggested poor iPhone sales certainly are a indication of marketplace saturation; at this stage, most people who want an iPhone curently have one, and that’s a hard hurdle to overcome, specifically with people modernizing much less frequently. It is even surprisingly possible that Apple listed the 2018 iPhones out of the developing markets the business claims to be targeting. After all, in the event that you reside in China and need it a new mobile phone, are you going to buy an iPhone XS for $1,000 (¥6800) or even more, or are you going to get the most recent Vivo or Xiaomi Android mobile phone that’s produced locally and can do essentially anything iPhone XS can do at a fraction of the price? And in addition, Cook routinely sidestepped the topic of increasing iPhone prices - a concern that we’ve noticed across the majority of Apple’s product line for that situation - which has been among the main criticisms of more recent iPhones. Brand-new Price Range Rises Price raises for the iPhone used to be pretty rare. Actually, after carriers stopped providing subsidized prices on smartphones, forcing us to start paying complete MSRP if we wanted to buy brand-new iPhones, we could at least depend on a consistent starting price from 12 months to year. That starting price used to be $649. With the release of iPhone 8 in 2017, it jumped to $699, a discouraging gain, but it wasn’t too discouraging. It was only a $50 boost after generations of a constant price, a lot of people gave Apple a pass. Additionally, actually at the bigger price, iPhone 8 seemed certainly cheap compared to the $999 price on the brand new iPhone X. But apparently, the price increase for iPhone 7 set a precedent because in 2018, the purchase price jumped yet again. Matching the enhance from iPhone 7 to iPhone 8, the 2018 iPhone lineup started at $749 for iPhone XR. You could argue that iPhone XR is a better device than iPhone 7 and justifies the excess $100, but worth is subjective. Although some might say iPhone XR is worth its $749 beginning price, especially compared to Apple’s more superior versions, many people will fixate on how each new era of iPhone is more costly than the one before. And at this time, can you blame them? To create matters even worse, as iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR were getting unveiled about stage during Apple’s fall 2018 event, iPhone SE was being discontinued. So not only are iPhones getting more and more expensive, but Apple has eliminated the only spending budget option we had. So if you’re looking to get a new iPhone in 2019, there’s very little choice anymore. Purchasers are essentially having to simply accept Apple’s higher starting price in the absence of a true budget iPhone. Naturally, customers and critics as well are getting more vocal within their demands an iPhone SE successor. Incredible Unforeseen Benefits Apple launched the iPhone SE , which stands for Particular Edition, in March 2016 at a special spring event. Both for customers and the industry most importantly, iPhone SE was a very un-Apple device for Apple to release. The iPhone 6 had just jumped in size and received a totally new design from the prior generation. Then iPhone SE premiered, having a smaller, compact type with its design virtually indistinguishable from the previous-generation iPhone 5. A lot more surprising was the actual fact that iPhone SE particularly featured most of Apple’s up-to-date, flagship-level engineering regardless of the low starting price; for $399, you have the same custom A9 processor as iPhone 6S in addition to a 12 MP camcorder with 4K video recording and a bigger battery. The fact is, the only significant compromises were the lack of 3D Touch and the use of first-generation TouchID rather than the faster second generation. But, again, considering its low starting price (which ultimately settled to $349), the iPhone SE provided uncharacteristically great value for a product made by Apple. The issue was that iPhone SE didn’t become a top-selling iPhone. In the course of its life-span, its defining characteristic was that it offered an affordable point of access to the iOS ecosystem though it eventually gained somewhat of a cult following among specific Apple fans. Naturally, after iPhone SE have been the baseline of the iPhone lineup for a couple of years, consumers were ready for the required refresh. Although iPhone SE offered a great cost-to-performance rate in 2016, a refresh could connect the performance gap that grew as iPhone SE’s A9 processor was succeeded and changed, first by the A10 Fusion chip in iPhone 7, on the other hand by the A11 Bionic in the iPhone 8, iPhone 8 Plus, and iPhone X . Patiently Looking ahead to Apple's Latest Product launches Sure enough, we listened that Apple was focusing on a fresh version of the budget iPhone. Details varied, but the iPhone SE successor - alleged to be called possibly iPhone SE 2 or iPhone X SE (with suffix and modifiers meticulously arranged)- appeared to have the equal purpose as the initial, which was to become a compact, low-cost iPhone offering great performance and most of the latest features. A lot of the disagreement surrounding the naming scheme for the iPhone SE 2 was because of contradictory information as to whether the device would retain its iPhone 5-era design or whether it could embrace the new iPhone X visual. Some customers insisted (or maybe hoped?) iPhone SE 2 would look like an iPhone X from the front with a almost bezel-less, edge-to-edge screen. These accounts were largely informed by supposed designs for display screen protectors and situations; if legitimate, the implication was that iPhone SE 2 would have a bezel-much less, notched display similar to iPhone X, iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR. Of course, the notch would become one of the defining features for 2018 mobile phones overall as its was imitated by nearly every smartphone manufacturer after the iPhone X debuted in late 2017; however, for Apple’s purposes, the notch only exists to house biometric sensors for Apple’s proprietary FaceID. So the implication was that iPhone SE 2 would feature FaceID although the high cost of FaceID components managed to get an unlikely inclusion in any budget iPhone. Following these reports, renders were made to show the way the device might appear if it turned out to be real. Assuming the case designs and resulting renders were accurate, iPhone SE 2 would’ve been a truly fascinating device, the lovechild of the bygone iPhone 5 and the more futuristic iPhone X. Provided Apple could keep creation costs and, by extension, the MSRP straight down, iPhone SE 2 could’ve easily outsold the initial iPhone SE, possibly becoming a top seller just like the original iPhone SE never could.

These weren’t simply the pipe dreams of iPhone SE supporters and anyone who wanted cheaper iPhones; reviews from Apple’s own suppliers all but confirmed programs for iPhone SE 2, offering estimates for possible creation schedules and ship dates. In early August 2017, Wistron Corp. - a low-volume manufacturer located in Taiwan that Apple recruits when iPhone demand is certainly high - was focusing on expanding its production base to accommodate a new compact Apple smartphone, which many presumed to end up being an updated iPhone SE. After that came a tentative ship time: In late November 2017, Economic Daily Information in Taiwan reported Apple had been eyeing a release day in the first half of 2018 for the iPhone SE 2, which would’ve been consistent with the spring release of the original iPhone SE. January 2018 brought another report of iPhone SE 2 launching in 2018. Shortly thereafter, there was a rumor iPhone SE 2 would feature a glass rear panel, suggesting the addition of the wireless charging features that the iPhone has had since 2017. Just mainly because rumors pointed to Apple gearing up for the release of a next-generation iPhone SE, Ming-Chi Kuo, an analyst with KGI Securities who is known for predicting Apple’s products with uncanny accuracy, planted one of the initial seeds of doubt. In late January 2018, Kuo reported iPhone SE 2 had hardly any chance of being released because Apple had exhausted its assets on the three flagship models to be released in 2018. Of program, those three models finished up being iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR. However, rumors persisted - though at a slower pace - in spite of Kuo’s question. For instance, there were specifications and other details of the iPhone SE 2 reported in April 2018. Relating to these leaks, Apple intended to keep creation costs (and, by extension, the eventual retail price) down by omitting the 3.5mm headphone jack and using iPhone 7’s A10 Fusion chip instead of the A11 Bionic chip used in iPhone 8 and iPhone X. For all intents and reasons, the axe was decisively dropped in July 2018 as BlueFin Research told MacRumors that Apple had nixed all programs to proceed with iPhone SE 2. We’ll probably never know for sure whether iPhone SE 2 was ever actually in the offing; however, also if it was planned in the beginning, it’s unlikely that we’ll ever obtain an iPhone SE 2 at all. It’s been four months since the launch of the 2018 iPhones, a meeting that coincided with iPhone SE being removed from Apple’s lineup, which, in and of itself, allegedly happened because Apple retired its A9 processor. So apart from Apple quickly unloading the last iPhone SE systems at a discounted $249 price, which took just 24 hours, iPhone SE is fully gone from Apple’s catalog, and anyone looking forward to a next-generation iPhone SE has little trigger for hope. In the event that you ask me, the writing is on the wall: Apple won’t be making another budget iPhone. FORGET ABOUT Budget iPhone? Spending budget smartphones, or smartphones that price roughly $300 or less, are pretty common nowadays. In some instances, these budget devices give great value for your money. Some of the newer notable for example the Moto G6 for $240, LG Stylo 4 for $250, Huawei Mate 20 Lite for $290, and, of course, the amazing Pocophone F1 for $299. For those who have a tad more to spend, you can look for a used or refurbished Samsung Galaxy S8 for barely over $300. Or you may get the brand new Nokia 7.1, an Android One device with the look and nearly all of the features that top-shelf Android flagships have for the discount price of $350. I’m not sure where in fact the phrase originated, but I completely agree: “Good cell phones are receiving cheap, and cheap mobile phones are getting good.” Of course, you might’ve noticed that the smartphones mentioned above are Android smartphones. How about iPhones? When carriers did apart with subsidizing smartphones, we had to start paying full retail cost for new smartphones. So Apple’s decision to create the iPhone SE was extremely timely: Rather than paying $649 or more, you could purchase an iPhone at under $400 without making a ton of compromises. Suddenly, individuals who favored iOS to Android had their own Pocophone. From September 2016 to its discontinuation in September 2018, iPhone SE was never a top-selling iPhones. Also at its peak, iPhone SE never accounted for more than 11 percent of iPhone sales as the third-best-selling iPhone, and just by a thin margin. Meanwhile, both iPhone 7 and iPhone 7 Plus nearly tripled the product sales of iPhone SE during that period, accounting for 28.5 percent and 29.5 percent of iPhone sales, respectively. After September 2017, iPhone SE sales dropped substantially, remaining somewhere between 5.5 percent and 8 percent until the device was taken in fall 2018. Imagine that you’re Tim Cook seeking at these numbers. Everybody has been asking for a second-generation budget iPhone, but sales numbers show that whenever a lower-cost option is available, nearly all customers keep purchasing the more costly iPhones. If clients are prepared to pay even more for high-end iPhones, does it seem sensible to produce a cheaper gadget that, at best, no more than one in ten consumers will be interested in buying? With some context, positioning the iPhone more as a luxury item starts to make sense. Like voting on a ballot, Apple’s consumers have been casting their votes on higher-end iPhones, therefore we can’t actually blame Apple for leaving budget smartphones that don’t sell well. If you’re miffed about the death of iPhone SE 2, there are, actually, cheaper iPhones obtainable for people on a budget. But you’re not going to see them in retail stores. Current Market Conditions Apple gave clients the lower-cost iPhone they’d long been asking for, but many of them didn't buy it. Therefore if you’re Apple, do you produce a second era knowing the first era didn’t sell well, or perform you ditch the budget-iPhone idea altogether? It seems Apple chose the latter. Nevertheless, it doesn’t eliminate from the actual fact that budget iPhones are already available, not to mention plentiful. Specifically, I’m discussing used iPhones in the marketplace. The gray market refers to the investing of used iPhones on the secondhand marketplace. It’s comprised of the many people selling their utilized products after upgrading, which essentially produces an unofficial marketplace of budget iPhones. So those listings for iPhone 6S, iPhone 7, and iPhone 8 on eBay, the Amazon Marketplace, services like Swappa, and yard-sale applications like LetGo are the gray market for iPhones. Apple doesn’t have to spend money on R&D, sourcing parts, production, and distribution for a budget iPhone because we curently have access to all of the discounted iPhones we could ever need in the secondhand market. And each year when new iPhones are released, millions more iPhones will revitalize the secondhand market as users who upgrade to fresh iPhones sell their outdated ones. Plus, any post-2016 iPhone models about the gray market could have better specifications than iPhone SE, and some of these used iPhones will be cheaper than investing in a new iPhone SE from Apple for $349. Basically, Apple doesn’t need to sell a budget iPhone since the current-generation iPhones purchased at complete retail cost today become budget iPhones as consumers utilize them and finally sell them to on the gray market if they upgrade. And even more devices are detailed on the gray market every day, so as long as Apple is selling smartphones, the gray market is a renewable resource for budget iPhones. Of program, the gray market isn’t the only method to get an iPhone on the cheap. Depending on how you look at it, Apple actually offers new budget iPhone options every year. With the official unveiling of new iPhones each year, the MSRP of every preceding generation still in production is decreased. For instance, when iPhone 8, iPhone 8 Plus, and iPhone X had been announced in nov 2017, iPhone 7 and iPhone 7 Plus became previous-generation gadgets, which warranted cost cuts. The iPhone SE was still in production when iPhone 7 got its price cut, so if you wanted a fresh iPhone but didn’t want to spend $699 or more for iPhone 8 or iPhone X, you could choose iPhone SE from $349, iPhone 6S from $449, or iPhone 7 from $549. Though $349 isn’t precisely chump switch, it’s certainly more palatable than iPhone X’s thousand-dollar starting cost. With iPhone SE discontinued, the cheapest iPhone available is iPhone 7 for $449, meaning the least expensive iPhone available today is $100 more than last year. To be fair, iPhone 7 was a great device at start, and it’s still a compelling option today, specifically for the cost. Though it was divisive as Apple’s initial iPhone without the apparently requisite 3.5mm headphone jack, iPhone 7 is otherwise a full-presented flagship. But if you’re shopping for a fresh iPhone on a budget, which would you rather buy: a 2016 iPhone for $449 or an iPhone SE 2 with the latest A12 Bionic processor chip for $100 less? Regarding iPhone SE 2 not materializing, maybe understanding what could’ve been is usually what makes this thus disappointing for some. Even though the data suggests a limited audience for spending budget iPhones, there will be situations in which a low-cost iPhone with current-generation efficiency hits the sweet place. Where Should Apple Go From Here? It’s a great time to become a lover of tech, particularly mobile phone tech as spending budget and mid-range flagships are slaying in the Android smartphone market. Though priced greater than a $349 iPhone, the OnePlus 6T is certainly a primary example of how exactly to offer flagship-level specs, design, and performance at a reduced cost. For better or worse, Apple seems to have evacuated the budget smartphone sector after just one attempt. Granted, Apple hasn't really catered to budget-minded consumers with almost all the company’s equipment starting at $1,000 or more and a shrinking quantity of gadgets, like iPods and iPads, priced less than that. For this reason it was so unusual for Apple to create a budget iPhone in the first place. The problem is that it appears Apple is now trying to close a door that maybe the business never should’ve opened to begin with. After all, when you’re offering this inexpensive iPhone on the lineup, all the flagship iPhones seem that a lot more expensive by comparison. Whether or not there’s a new iPhone SE in the future, the prices mounted on Apple’s products are climbing. In lots of markets, Apple is coming dangerously close to pricing the iPhone and also most of Apple’s other items out of reach. For customers who can’t (or don’t wish to) pay such exorbitant prices, the fact that Apple offered inexpensive options in the past but no more offers those options now will certainly leave a bad taste in people’s mouths, nearly like biting into a rotten apple. Honestly, I hope I’m wrong concerning this, but if Apple wants to curb the decline in iPhone demand and for sales to resume an upward trajectory, 1 of 2 things will need to happen, and sooner instead of later. Apple must either lower the margins on iPhones to create them more affordable (or even just less costly), or there needs to be a fresh budget option so consumers in least have the illusion of choice. Because as the numbers show, most buyers go for the premium iPhones anyway, but if Apple puts a budget model up for grabs, at least they won’t feel like they’re being forced to pay the ever-growing Apple tax. Apple’s current pricing structure gives consumers only high- and higher-priced models to choose from. But it appears buyers are beginning to understand there’s still one other option, which is certainly to save themselves the trouble, and potentially some buyer’s remorse, by not buying brand-new iPhones at all.

#smartphones

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bagelpyjama19 · 4 years

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Apple Revenue Approach for Next Season

Apple is considered to be the most innovative business enterprise in the globe now. It is the company to which nearly all others search for direction. When Apple reveals an innovative new design language or launches a fresh product, it generates ripples throughout the market. Quickly, the entire industry is manufacturing items in Apple’s image. However to state Apple is merely a trend-setter undermines the business’s position as probably the figurehead of creativity in consumer technology. Apple isn’t simply setting technology tendencies; Apple’s vision models precedents and begins actions that allow the styles to exist in the first place. As great as it must feel to be Apple in this scenario - and as humbling since it must experience to be the many businesses copying Apple at every change - it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. Most people can claw your way to the very best of a mountain, but there’s not a lot of stable ground up there. One incorrect step and your toppling back off the mountain, undoing years of the hard work needed to get up there. We do not want to discount Apple’s successes in 2018: Apple Pencil program for iPad was a good addition; iOS 12 has given new life to iPhones as aged as the 5S; Apple Watch Series 4 is literally conserving lives; and that’s simply a few highlights. Looking back again, though, 2018 was a pretty tough year for Apple as certain missteps finished up impacting the company’s important thing. Between Apple’s most questionable movements in 2018, there’s one I wanted to focus on for an essential purpose: Without second-generation iPhone SE in sight, it seems Apple has exited the spending budget flagship market. The fact is, I’ll consider it one step further: I am certain Apple would not be delivering any more budget iPhones, and here’s why. Apple’s product portfolio is usually varied. The company generates revenue from providers like iTunes and Apple Music to accessories like AirPods and the Magic Key pad, from home entertainment devices like Apple TV 4K to personal processing devices like the MacBook Pro. However product sales for the majority of these aren’t that impressive (though Apple’s profit margins absolutely are). It’s in fact the iPhone that accounts for the majority of Apple’s revenue. Since its debut in 2007, iPhone has pushed Apple’s earnings to such amazing heights that the business is just about the first trillion-dollar firm ever sold. With so much of Apple’s revenue riding on the game-changing gadget, you can wager there would be a significant drop in Apple’s revenue if people beginning buying less iPhones. And that is exactly what we are witnessing. Following a moderate fourth quarter, income for Q12019 - which, to be clear, is comprised of October, November, and December, encompassing the holiday shopping season - was lower than Apple originally expected. With the price of brand-new iPhones rising, revenue would’ve increased also if unit sales experienced only remained regular, but there have been fewer iPhone units sold during the period. The implication is normally that demand has waned, or it’s possible there wasn’t much demand for Apple’s expensive new iPhones to begin with. The initial hint of problems was in 2017, the entire year iPhone X premiered. At a starting cost 50 percent greater than the previous year’s baseline model, iPhone X unit product sales were reportedly flat although Apple’s income increased. Just how? Because even though Apple sold roughly the same number of units as the year before, the average cost of an iPhone had elevated. When you sell the same quantity of products but mark up the price, you still see a bump in product sales. Of course, it’s not only the iPhone that is gotten more expensive. Apple has elevated selling prices across virtually all of the enterprise’s stock portfolio. But with the iPhone driving profits, the implication can be this: Whenever iPhone product sales continue to be smooth or start to fall, Apple will need to keep raising the price of the iPhone each year to maintain year-over-year income gains. As you can plainly see, it’s not really a coincidence Apple has decided to stop reporting iPhone unit sales publicly. Also if 2017 was an outlier, the release of new iPhones in the fall is meant to give Apple a go of revenue adrenaline in the ultimate stretch out, enabling for a strong finish as the company crosses the fiscal finish line. But for the second calendar year in a row, that did not come up. Doesn’t it appear plausible, if not likely, that increasing the costs for fresh iPhones has led to lower demand? About a week ago, Apple CEO delivered a document to shareholders. You can read the letter for yourself on Apple’s website, but it warns investors that Apple’s 1Q2019 income will end up being $9 billion less than was originally projected. The letter mainly blames China’s industry for almost all the year-over-year iPhone income decline even while also indicating that individuals are still adapting to the extinction of carrier subsidies. In a recent interview Cook explained most of the same reasons to clarify lower-than-anticipated iPhone revenue. Besides slowed growth in developing marketplaces and having less subsidized prices through service providers, Cook suggested to iOS 12 and the $29 battery replacement plan seeing that having encouraged users to hold their current iPhones rather than looking for new ones. As you might remember, Apple started the battery alternative program in late 2017 in wish of hiding the smell of the battery hot debate, which had earned concerns of planned obsolescence. As outlined by Cook, many with older iPhones decided not to upgrade since they could get fresh batteries for inexpensive. This would remove the efficiency caps that Apple had imposed to them, repairing their iPhones with their former glory, specially when paired with iOS 12. In fact, Apple visited lengths to make sure that iOS 12 would make older iPhones faster, so Make is probably right in assuming the battery substitute program and iOS 12 factored into the weaker sales of 2018 iPhones. On the other hand, Cook declared that challenging trade relations between the US and China was ultimately the largest factor. China represents a ton of untapped sales prospect of Apple, so there’s most likely some truth compared to that, too. You can observe the full interview in the video below if you want to hear more of what Make must say about it. Meanwhile, critics and analysts have suggested poor iPhone sales certainly are a indication of market saturation; at this stage, most people who want an iPhone curently have one, and that’s a hard hurdle to overcome, specifically with customers stepping up less frequently. It is also truly feasible that Apple priced the 2018 iPhones out of the developing markets the business claims to be targeting. After all, if you reside in China and need it a new cell phone, will you buy an iPhone XS for $1,000 (¥6800) or even more, or are you going to get the most recent Vivo or Xiaomi Android mobile phone that’s manufactured locally and may do pretty much whatever iPhone XS can do at a portion of the price? Not surprisingly, Cook mainly sidestepped the topic of ballooning iPhone prices - a concern that we’ve noticed across most of Apple’s products for that matter - which has been one of the main criticisms of latest iPhones. Latest Price Increases Price increases for the iPhone used to end up being pretty rare. Actually, after carriers stopped providing subsidized prices on mobile phones, forcing us to start paying complete MSRP if we wanted to buy fresh iPhones, we could at least depend on a constant starting price from season to year. That starting price used to be $649. With the launch of iPhone 8 in 2017, it jumped to $699, a disappointing gain, but it wasn’t too surprising. It was only a $50 boost after generations of a constant price, so many people gave Apple a pass. And, also at the higher price, iPhone 8 seemed definitely inexpensive when compared to $999 price tag on the new iPhone X. However apparently, the price increase for iPhone 7 set a precedent because in 2018, the purchase price jumped again. Matching the increase from iPhone 7 to iPhone 8, the 2018 iPhone line-up started at $749 for iPhone XR. You would argue that iPhone XR is a much better device than iPhone 7 and justifies the extra $100, but value is subjective. Although some might say iPhone XR will probably be worth its $749 starting price, especially compared to Apple’s more high quality versions, many customers will fixate on how each new era of iPhone is more costly than the one before. And at this time, can you blame them? To create matters worse yet, as iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR were getting unveiled in stage during Apple’s fall 2018 event, iPhone SE was being discontinued. So not only are iPhones getting a lot more expensive, but Apple has now eliminated the only spending budget option we had. So if you’re looking to get a new iPhone in 2019, there’s not much choice anymore. Purchasers are effectively having to accept Apple’s higher beginning price in the lack of a true budget iPhone. Naturally, customers and critics as well are receiving more vocal in their calls for an iPhone SE successor. Significant Unexpected Value Apple revealed the iPhone SE , which stands for Particular Edition, in March 2016 in a special spring event. Both for customers and the industry most importantly, iPhone SE was a very un-Apple device for Apple to release. The iPhone 6 had just jumped in size and received a completely new design from the prior generation. Then iPhone SE was released, having a smaller, compact type with its design virtually indistinguishable from the previous-generation iPhone 5. Even more surprising was the actual fact that iPhone SE remarkably featured most of Apple’s up-to-date, flagship-level engineering regardless of the low starting price; for $399, you got the same custom made A9 processor as iPhone 6S in addition to a 12 MP camera with 4K video recording and a bigger electric battery. The fact is, the only significant short-cuts were the lack of 3D Touch and the use of first-generation TouchID instead of the faster second generation. But, again, taking into consideration its low starting cost (which ultimately settled to $349), the iPhone SE provided uncharacteristically great worth for a product made by Apple. The challenge was that iPhone SE did not become a top-selling iPhone. Throughout its life-span, its defining characteristic was that it provided an inexpensive point of entry to the iOS ecosystem though it eventually gained relatively of a cult following among certain Apple fans. Obviously, after iPhone SE had been the baseline of the iPhone lineup for a couple of years, consumers were ready for the obligatory refresh. While iPhone SE offered an excellent cost-to-performance rate in 2016, a refresh could bridge the efficiency gap that grew as iPhone SE’s A9 processor was succeeded and changed, first by the A10 Fusion chip in iPhone 7, then again by the A11 Bionic in the iPhone 8, iPhone 8 Plus, and iPhone X . Patiently Looking forward to Apple's Latest Product launches Affirmed, we heard through the grapevine that Apple was focusing on a new version of the spending budget iPhone. Details varied, however the iPhone SE successor - alleged to be named either iPhone SE 2 or iPhone X SE (with suffix and modifiers meticulously arranged)- seemed to have the same purpose as the original, which was to be a compact, low-cost iPhone offering great efficiency and most of the latest features. A lot of the difference surrounding the naming theme for the iPhone SE 2 was because of unclear accounts concerning whether the gadget will keep its iPhone 5-era style or whether it would embrace the new iPhone X visual. Some customers insisted (or possibly hoped?) iPhone SE 2 would appear to be an iPhone X from leading with a almost bezel-less, edge-to-edge screen. These accounts were mainly informed by supposed designs for screen protectors and cases; if reputable, the implication was that iPhone SE 2 could have a bezel-much less, notched display identical to iPhone X, iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR. Of program, the notch would become among the defining features for 2018 mobile phones overall as its was imitated by almost every smartphone manufacturer after the iPhone X debuted in late 2017; nevertheless, for Apple’s purposes, the notch only exists to house biometric sensors for Apple’s proprietary FaceID. So the implication was that iPhone SE 2 would feature FaceID although the high cost of FaceID components managed to get an unlikely inclusion in any budget iPhone. Following these reports, renders were designed to show the way the device might look if it turned out to be real. Assuming the case designs and resulting renders had been accurate, iPhone SE 2 would’ve been a truly fascinating gadget, the lovechild of the bygone iPhone 5 and the more futuristic iPhone X. Provided Apple could keep production costs and, by extension, the MSRP straight down, iPhone SE 2 could’ve easily outsold the original iPhone SE, possibly learning to be a top seller just like the original iPhone SE never could. These weren’t just the pipe dreams of iPhone SE fans and anyone who wanted cheaper iPhones; reports from Apple’s personal suppliers all but verified programs for iPhone SE 2, giving estimates for possible production schedules and ship dates. In early August 2017, Wistron Corp. - a low-volume manufacturer located in Taiwan that Apple recruits when iPhone demand is definitely high - was working on expanding its creation base to accommodate a new compact Apple smartphone, which many presumed to become an updated iPhone SE. After that came a tentative ship day: In late November 2017, Economic Daily Information in Taiwan reported Apple had been eyeing a release time in the first half of 2018 for the iPhone SE 2, which would’ve been consistent with the spring release of the initial iPhone SE. January 2018 brought another report of iPhone SE 2 launching in 2018. Shortly thereafter, there is a rumor iPhone SE 2 would include a glass rear panel, suggesting the addition of the wireless charging capabilities that the iPhone has already established since 2017. Just simply because rumors pointed to Apple gearing up for the release of a next-generation iPhone SE, Ming-Chi Kuo, an analyst with KGI Securities who is known for predicting Apple’s products with uncanny accuracy, planted one of the initial seeds of doubt. In late January 2018, Kuo reported iPhone SE 2 had hardly any chance of being released because Apple had exhausted its assets on the three flagship models to be released in 2018. Of training course, those three models finished up being iPhone XS, iPhone XS Max, and iPhone XR. However, rumors persisted - though at a slower pace - in spite of Kuo’s question. For instance, there have been specifications and other details of the iPhone SE 2 reported in April 2018. According to these leaks, Apple designed to keep production costs (and, by extension, the eventual retail price) down by omitting the 3.5mm headphone jack and using iPhone 7’s A10 Fusion chip instead of the A11 Bionic chip used in iPhone 8 and iPhone X. For all intents and reasons, the axe was decisively dropped in July 2018 as BlueFin Research told MacRumors that Apple had nixed all plans to proceed with iPhone SE 2. We’ll probably never find out for certain whether iPhone SE 2 was ever actually in the offing; however, even if it was planned originally, it’s unlikely that we’ll ever get an iPhone SE 2 at all. It’s been four a few months since the start of the 2018 iPhones, an event that coincided with iPhone SE being taken off Apple’s lineup, which, in and of itself, allegedly happened because Apple retired its A9 processor chip. So aside from Apple quickly unloading the last iPhone SE products at a discounted $249 price, which took only a day, iPhone SE is gone from Apple’s catalog, and anyone looking forward to a next-generation iPhone SE has little cause for hope. In the event that you ask me, the writing is on the wall: Apple won’t be building another budget iPhone. No More Budget iPhone? Spending budget smartphones, or smartphones that price roughly $300 or less, are pretty common today. In some instances, these budget devices present great value for your money. Some of the more recent notable for example the Moto G6 for $240, LG Stylo 4 for $250, Huawei Mate 20 Lite for $290, and, of course, the amazing Pocophone F1 for $299. For those who have a tad more to invest, you can find a used or refurbished Samsung Galaxy S8 for barely over $300. Or you may get the brand new Nokia 7.1, an Android One device with the design and nearly all of the features that top-shelf Android flagships possess for the bargain price of $350. I’m not sure where the term originated, but I completely agree: “Good cell phones are getting cheap, and cheap phones are getting good.” Of training course, you might’ve noticed that the smartphones mentioned previously are Android smartphones. What about iPhones? When carriers did aside with subsidizing smartphones, we had to begin paying full retail cost for new smartphones. Therefore Apple’s decision to create the iPhone SE was very timely: Instead of paying $649 or even more, you could buy an iPhone for under $400 without making a huge amount of compromises. Suddenly, people who preferred iOS to Android had their personal Pocophone. From September 2016 to its discontinuation in September 2018, iPhone SE was never a top-selling iPhones. Also at its peak, iPhone SE under no circumstances accounted for more than 11 percent of iPhone sales as the third-best-selling iPhone, and just by a slender margin. Meanwhile, both iPhone 7 and iPhone 7 Plus almost tripled the product sales of iPhone SE during that period, accounting for 28.5 percent and 29.5 percent of iPhone sales, respectively. After September 2017, iPhone SE sales dropped substantially, remaining somewhere between 5.5 percent and 8 percent until the device was taken in fall 2018. Suppose you’re Tim Cook looking at these amounts. Everybody has been requesting a second-generation budget iPhone, but sales numbers present that when a lower-cost option is available, the majority of customers keep purchasing the more expensive iPhones. If customers are willing to pay even more for high-end iPhones, does it seem sensible to produce a cheaper device that, at best, no more than one in ten customers would be interested in buying? With some context, positioning the iPhone more as a luxury item starts to make sense. Like voting on a ballot, Apple’s customers have been casting their votes on higher-end iPhones, therefore we can’t really blame Apple for moving away from budget smartphones that don’t sell well. If you’re miffed about the loss of life of iPhone SE 2, there are, in fact, cheaper iPhones obtainable for people on a budget. But you’re not going to find them in shops. Current Market Conditions Apple gave customers the lower-cost iPhone they’d always been asking for, but most of them decided not to buy it. Therefore if you’re Apple, do you create a second generation knowing the first generation didn’t sell well, or perform you ditch the budget-iPhone idea altogether? It seems Apple find the latter. Nevertheless, it doesn’t take away from the fact that spending budget iPhones are already available, not forgetting plentiful. Specifically, I’m discussing used iPhones in the marketplace. The gray market identifies the buying and selling of used iPhones on the secondhand market. It’s comprised of the many people selling their used gadgets after upgrading, which essentially creates an unofficial marketplace of budget iPhones. Therefore those listings for iPhone 6S, iPhone 7, and iPhone 8 on eBay, the Amazon Marketplace, providers like Swappa, and yard-sale apps like LetGo will be the gray market for iPhones. Apple doesn’t need to invest in R&D, sourcing parts, production, and distribution for a budget iPhone because we already have access to all the discounted iPhones we could ever need in the secondhand marketplace. And each year when brand-new iPhones are released, millions even more iPhones will revitalize the secondhand market as users who upgrade to new iPhones sell their older ones. Plus, any post-2016 iPhone models in the gray market will have better specifications than iPhone SE, and some of these used iPhones will be cheaper than buying a new iPhone SE from Apple for $349. Put simply, Apple doesn’t need to sell a budget iPhone because the current-generation iPhones purchased at full retail cost today become budget iPhones as consumers use them and eventually sell them to on the gray market when they upgrade. And even more devices are shown on the gray marketplace every day, in order long as Apple is offering smartphones, the gray marketplace is a renewable resource for budget iPhones. Of program, the gray marketplace isn’t the only way to get an iPhone on the cheap. Depending about how you consider it, Apple actually offers new budget iPhone options each year. With the official unveiling of new iPhones each year, the MSRP of every preceding generation still in creation is decreased. For instance, when iPhone 8, iPhone 8 Plus, and iPhone X were announced in nov 2017, iPhone 7 and iPhone 7 Plus became previous-generation products, which warranted cost cuts. The iPhone SE was still in production when iPhone 7 got its lessen price, if you wanted a new iPhone but didn’t want to spend $699 or even more for iPhone 8 or iPhone X, you could choose iPhone SE from $349, iPhone 6S from $449, or iPhone 7 from $549. Though $349 isn’t specifically chump transformation, it’s certainly even more palatable than iPhone X’s thousand-dollar starting cost. With iPhone SE discontinued, the least expensive iPhone available is iPhone 7 for $449, meaning the cheapest iPhone available today is $100 a lot more than last year. To be fair, iPhone 7 was an excellent device at launch, and it’s still a compelling option today, especially for the price. Though it had been divisive as Apple’s initial iPhone without the apparently requisite 3.5mm headphone jack, iPhone 7 is in any other case a full-presented flagship. But if you’re searching for a fresh iPhone on a spending budget, which would you rather purchase: a 2016 iPhone for $449 or an iPhone SE 2 with the latest A12 Bionic processor chip for $100 less? Regarding iPhone SE 2 not materializing, maybe understanding what could’ve been is normally what makes this thus disappointing for some. Even though the data suggests a limited audience for budget iPhones, there will always be situations where a low-cost iPhone with current-generation efficiency hits the sweet spot. Where Should Apple Go From Here? It’s an enjoyable experience to be a lover of tech, particularly cell tech as budget and mid-range flagships are slaying in the Android smartphone market. Though priced greater than a $349 iPhone, the OnePlus 6T is certainly a primary example of how to offer flagship-level specs, design, and efficiency at a lower life expectancy cost. For better or worse, Apple seems to have evacuated the budget smartphone sector after just one single attempt. Granted, Apple hasn't really catered to budget-minded consumers with almost all the company’s equipment starting at $1,000 or even more and a shrinking amount of products, like iPods and iPads, priced lower than that. That is why it was so unusual for Apple to produce a budget iPhone to begin with. The problem is that it appears Apple is currently trying to close a door that probably the business never should’ve opened to begin with. In the end, when you’re offering this inexpensive iPhone on the lineup, all the flagship iPhones appear that much more expensive by comparison. Whether there’s a new iPhone SE in the future, the prices mounted on Apple’s items are climbing. In many markets, Apple is coming dangerously near to pricing the iPhone as well as the majority of Apple’s other products out of reach. For customers who can’t (or don’t need to) pay out such exorbitant prices, the actual fact that Apple offered inexpensive options during the past but no longer offers those options now will undoubtedly leave a bad taste in people’s mouths, almost like biting into a rotten apple. Honestly, I am hoping I’m wrong about this, but if Apple really wants to curb the decline in iPhone demand and for product sales to resume an upward trajectory, one of two things will have to happen, and sooner rather than later. Apple needs to either lower the margins on iPhones to create them more affordable (or even just less costly), or there needs to be a fresh budget option so consumers in least have the illusion of preference. Because as the numbers show, most buyers go for the premium iPhones in any case, but if Apple puts a budget model on the table, at least they won’t feel like they’re being forced to pay the ever-growing Apple tax. Apple’s current pricing structure gives consumers only high- and higher-priced models to pick from. But it seems buyers are beginning to understand there’s still an added option, which can be to save themselves the difficulty, and possibly some buyer’s remorse, by not buying brand-new iPhones at all.

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