#they're just so normal it pains me

[martianbugsbunny]

Seriously Stamets and Culber make my stomach hurt a little bit I believe I am experiencing the shrimp emotions

#I've never had this reaction to a canon queer ship before #they're just so normal it pains me #like why couldn't we have had this before #but also it's brilliant that we have it now #hot darn I think I've discovered the experience of what they call 'heartache' #what a ride #star trek #Star Trek discovery #discovery #Paul stamets #hugh culber #culmets #lgbt #lgbtq

[qiinamii]

we'll do fine.

#fionna and cake spoilers #what hits me a little is how similar fionna and simon's stories are in the case of finding nuance in their lives #when both have gone through their separate but still valid pain no matter the extent it had been #and its that they met each other they get to see how it compares and they're no less worth of the peace and fun they dreamed of #even in the form of simplicity and just being normal #“i wouldn't have met THE fionna and cake” “we wouldn't have met THE simon petrikov” #it hits me harder that after the dandelion scene would've been their last time seeing each other physically #and how assuring simon sounded when fionna didn't know what to do with the literal world in her hands #tho im sure prismo isnt that much of a rule jerk lol i still drew out the revelation anyway with this tiniest addition #also the fact fionna's world is influenced by simon's thought processes and conditions so now things are a little better for both of them #fionna the human #fionna campbell #simon petrikov #qiiarts #the lil flashback of #betty grof #fionna and cake #adventure time

[thedreadvampy]

The thing is I am definitely not happy or chill in the Immediate Sense lately but I am, big picture, so fucking happy with the person I am.

It's like. My brain was made by and for consistent trauma and since that trauma stopped about 5-7 years ago, it is incredible what the amount of resilience and cleverness and flexibility and thoughtfulness I developed to survive can do when it's not being all spent on surviving. like I had a hundred ton weight on me so I had to get REALLY STRONG to stay in the same place and not get 100% crushed, and when that weight came off I found I can use the strength it used to take to stand up and I can leap tall buildings in a single bound.

I was talking to my mum the other day and she said, "you've got the 'fuck it' energy at 30 that most women don't find until their fifties at least" and I'm like yeah man. Imagine how unstoppable I'll be in 20 years.

#red said #i don't know that i can express this clearly but it's the most encouraging thing in my life #my mum's always been proud of me but just lately she seems to actually really admire me #like she's genuinely impressed. she thinks I've surpassed her. i don't necessarily agree but it's a really nice quiet joy. #anyway like this sounds super up myself and it kind of is. #but also it's part of realising just how heavy the weight I've been carrying around with me for 25 years was #like not to be ridiculous but i have realised again this week. that it isn't that everyone's been raped that much and doesn't talk about it #i just have been raped an Unusually Consistent Amount. i have spoken to a lot of people who have had much more horrifying things happen. #I'm not sure I've talked to more than a couple of people who've had a similar level of total consistency of abuse from all angles #and the one is not heavier or harder to bear that the other. but. i think i spent most of my life listening to people's awful experiences #and going ok well nothing i went through looked that bad so it's microtrauma #obviously microtraumas build up but still. #then the older i get and the more i have these conversations the more I notice that stuff which to me is a microtrauma #is a lot of people's defining trauma. and they're reacting appropriately which means i am SO SEVERELY UNDERREACTING #told my friend the other day about a time someone who i still like and respect was having sex with me when i paralocated my hip #and then just kept getting really annoyed with me for not being ready to have sex again while i was literally crying with pain #until i caved and just tried to find the last painful position #and my friend was like pal what the fuck that's horrific #and i was like i mean no that's normal I've had sex with like maybe 3 or 4 people in my life who i haven't had similar stuff with #like i am genuinely thrown when i am allowed to say no to sex and have it be the end of the conversation. and not end up having sex #out of guilt or out of physical coercion or through physical rape. and i have had sex with probably like 40 people at this stage? #and I'm not sure it's as many as 4 i haven't had that experience with tbh #so like. I'm slowly coming to terms with the idea #that i may have actually been doing a hell of a lot of heavy lifting. #like i developed a sense of self that can survive being constantly crushed and at this stage is fucking diamond.

[crossbackpoke-check]

Substance, Shadow, and Spirit [remixed, abridged] by Tao Yuanming

#liv in the replies #patrice bergeron #boston bruins #brad marchand #do you ever think about how brad marchand said that when bergy retired he would retire or are you capable of normal thought i'm not at all #please say a gratitude for both my sanity& y'all that this poem (which has been saved in my camera roll with the vague idea of using it for #??? ​long) & not one of the poems i had saved for carey for a really long time & remixed & everything with another poem until i found a poem #that absolutely murdered me in cold blood but there is an alternate universe where i did& then had to explain my unhinged thoughts to you. #anyway how are we feeling about bergy retirement. pspspspsp sara & luna are y'all doing okay like. the doc title for this one was #patrice the hockey player means a lot to me but patrice the person means so much more #which is why the end line of the other poem was so *%"@^)! (you love / what you are) because patrice does. like he is a whole ass good huma #& now since no one asked i need to tell you all the details about everything also y'all please clap i made an edit with NO baby pictures #although i did find one & save it & minimal genres of photo i always use in edits because they're my taste & aesthetic but anyway. #when i saved the first photo and marked it as one i wanted i accidentally wrote “how will he know they love him” which is not the line but #makes me feel feral about patrice & the rest of them all had hurtful names too but also. the third picture is literally a CELLY like brad #just scored a goal & he is clinging to bergy for dear life with that shit i saved that as “oh the agony on his face for unendurable” #& yes it is one of my cliches to have a draft day picture but in my defense the lifelong bond that patrice has/d with boston deserved to be #there even if i put in the love story & YES that picture is from the 2011 playoff right below it shared joy & pain & i couldn't tell you #when the brad marchy photo for together forever is except for the fact that i saw it & just the gut punch of oh my god the way he looks at #things men will praise you for is the stanley cup. duh. but i love the contrast of “some deed” being the stanley cup but then #bergy's choice to do noble deeds (ends up still earning praise &that's my note to his efforts outside of hockey we love a supportive captai #should also mention the first two i came up with & had the photos i knew i wanted for were the first and last one alskaldk but i KNEW i #wanted chara somewhere in the paragraph about leaving & then while i was looking found the one of bergy playing tuukka on accident & yes #i do have to make goalie jokes every time. no reprieve . no dice/no deal/no goal goalies have no rest/reprieve etc etc the one that killed #me though was looking for a patrice award pic & i wanted basically the one that i got for “how will you know any will praise you” & instead #also got the picture of patrice winning the some community hero award for charity work that he does & i love him mama & of COURSE that puck #is from bergy's 1000 game who do you think I am (if you guessed sleepy and emotional about patrice you'd be right) and ALSO please be ready #for all the patrice posts/bruins posts that have been sitting in my drafts to be released on this occasion of patrice retirement #I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT TUUKKA ALSO RETIRED THAT’S WHY HE WAS ON WISE OR SIMPLE NO REPRIEVE AND THAT LATE OR SOON WAS ALWAYS GOING TO BE #CHARA BECAUSE CHARA LEFT FIRST TO GO TO THE CAPS AND THEN LEFT IN RETIRMENT HE LEFT SOON BUT NOT FOR REAL THEN LATER LEFT FOR REAL (RETIRED)

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

:(

#cw animal injury #i turned on the lights and our dog is covered in blood like??? hello??? #since when were you doing that and why didn't you tell me??? *cue frantic searching for gauze* #there's a big cut where his ankle meets his leg (inside of the hind right leg) #i have no idea how that happened #our dogs play rough but have never drawn blood #and he was outside alone and he was acting normally and not whining or anything? like speak up man i need to know this shit #his name is bunny btw and he's a big dog. purebred great pyrenees(?) if the ppl we got him from are to be trusted #i don't know how he got hurt #its way too big/deep for a cat to have done it and even if they're really upset they just paw at his face #my only guess is that there's something sharp in the yard? but it's too dark to look #idfk but we found the gauze and stuff and he did Not like that process good thing there were 3 ppl awake to hold him down safely #he still didn't whine through all of that though like. pls speak up man. we gotta know if ur in pain so we can fix it #i'm hoping it doesn't get infected. we don't have money to go to the vet but he's my sister's dog and she might actually kill someone if #he isn't fine #she has a theory that he may have gotten cut on smth our brother threw out there and like. she may literally kill him if this #was his fault and bunny isn't fine #so far he seems fine there wasn't too much blood and there seems to just be the one cut #but i didn't hear him yelp or whine or anything #and he didn't seem to be limping but the lights were off #idk man but we have cleaned him up as best we can for now but it is the middle of the night so we'll see what we can do in the morning

[lith-myathar]

.

#really really hate how thoughtless and oblivious i can be to my own bad behavior #ill know something is important or that a shouldn't do a particular thing #but over time and assumptions and small acts of carelessnes shit just....fades and accumulates and one day #i look up and ive done something very stupid and hurt someone else #and i didn't feel it happening #my mind will take things and hide them from me is what it feels like. ill know they're there but it fades into the background noise #i am hard on the things in my life including people and relationships. and i am always so vulnerable to my own fuckin lmfao inattentivenes #this is why i struggle so much with the idea of ever having an intimate partner or children. it doesn't matter how much i care. #eventually and inevitably i do damage. #and i know consciously that people make mistakes and all you can do is try to course correct and make it right. but it's better #not to hurt anyone in the first place and i really don't know if i will ever be capable of that. #trying to convince myself this kind of shit is growing pains but man. man. i can't stop being what i am and it really #really feels sometimes like i am just destined to break and neglect #but then that ''im broken'' thing feels like trying to dodge around taking responsibility and improving. and i should be better than that. #but god how tf are you supposed to stop dissociating from the reality of what you're doing when you're. dissociated. #all i can ever think to do is isolate #*sigh* guys i think i might need to graduate to therapy with a trauma specialist #or adjust my medication. god. im so tired. #why is it so gd hard to be a normal decent person. it doesn't seem hard but then

[teleomancer]

.

#so it's Infect Your Friends And Loved Ones with the bit about 'everyone around here knows about you' #even if it's positive- the world pays so much more fucking attention to my life for being trans and it makes me.. shiver? #coffee clerk fumbled every facet of taking my order and the apology landed super duper sideways #'oh sorry! it's just that it's my first time helping *you* is all- just seen you around a lot before. you know.' yeah? know what exactly? #how's that supposed to make me feel? every month they hire someone new and we get to do the same tiring song and dance #another young-20s clerk that will not stop trying to make small talk w/me beats ones that only glare yeah- this isn't pain just frustration #and like YES it's better than the cashier that beats the shit out of my beers on purpose or crumples receipts to hand them to me #or the audible 'see- told you he's a man' commentary when he can see stubble behind a mask on days that can't bother me to shave #like the pharmacists at this supermarket make me well aware that nobody else gets their E here. the store knows the local tranny. great. #genpop cannot reliably be fucking Normal Abt Transfems to the point that it makes me wanna thank the rare coworker that just like. #doesn't treat me like anyone different or special or a threat or a curiosity or an object or a shot to gain social capital for being nice? #getting told by young-20s cis girls that calling me dude didn't mean anything b/c they're 'y'know! *also* [limp wrist mime] *girlypop!*' #hits closer to home than getting called a slur to my face because the latter asshole doesn't pretend to be my friend and just. #skips straight to making me a paper doll in their head of what it means to be me and shaped like me and dressed like me and it's.. slimy. #'everyone around here knows about you.'

[reachexceedinggrasp]

So when I've been complaining about even fanfiction not being romantic enough, part of what I mean by that is that people take huge, gothic characters in pairings with gigantic, dramatic stakes full of titanic emotions and then make them feel small and mundane. Stripping the very romanicism from the bones of the romance.

There are many things that are deeply appealing to me about B&tB pairings or 'unlikely' pairings or Gothic romance in general, but something that is less structural while still being absolutely key is that it's not an easy relationship to get the characters into. It's not something that would happen under ordinary circumstances for either person. It's not a bond that can be forged without some form of pressure preventing these people from continuing in their regular patterns.

If you're writing an E/C fic where you start from scratch, the moment they so much as touch for the first time should be absolutely show-stoppingly prodigious. It can never be casual, not between these two, the idea of a touch being allowed should be an Event. The reader's heart should be thundering in their chest, the suspense should be palpable, the consummation divine. A single touch is a consummation for them, there should be that much tension. If they hold hands and I'm not holding my breath, you have done it wrong. The first kiss should feel like an atom bomb going off, the world should shift on its axis, a line is being crossed which has left both characters forever altered.

And people will instead write them like a standard romance novel couple who make standard pervy comments in the narration, get a bit flirty, casually hook up and then weigh pros and cons about whether dating fits into their life plans or not. All of this being totally without weight, without feeling like any kind of Rubicon has been crossed or that it's significant for the characters to have entered into something which must foundationally alter their worldview.

Reylo brushing fingers across the galaxy and it being the turning point of the entire narrative, given the same majesty and mystical significance as Luke's vision in the cave or Yoda lifting the X-Wing is the exact correct amount of emphasis for them reaching towards each other in tenderness. You have a character defined by abandonment and loneliness and a character who is surrounded by people but never touched, both unseen by anyone else, both aching for connection, both never having felt anything like this before, both aware of the galaxy-spanning consequences of what they're feeling. Them touching is le big deal.

The kiss for the B&tB pairing, the EtL pairing, any Gothic pairing has to feel out of reach, a chasm that cannot be crossed- until it happens, impossible yet inevitable. Something the characters could never have conceived of taking place at the beginning of the story, an infinite abyss of which they have somehow found themselves on the other side. You have to do the work to get them there, you have to build that bridge stone by stone, and it should be a sublime agony of seeing the path take shape while it still feels like the gap is just unbridgable, that no matter how close you come, it will never be complete, they can never get all the way across. Until they do.

If you write characters who have (or should have) that kind of vast gulf separating them as just kind of falling into an intimacy which isn't earned and thus means nothing, I just have no idea why we're here. Why buy a giant gothic castle of romanticism and then bulldoze it to build a minimalist condo? Everything about the pairing that makes it that pairing is stripped away. If these were people who could just meet at a party and end up in bed, they would be completely different people.

#taking something epic and portentous #reducing it to a casual instant attraction they sort of casually and impulsively act on like it's ordering a coffee levels of important #and then it's all 'well maybe there's ~something there~ whatever tho don't think it matters or anything' while they're going on caj dates' #and ends with 'it's pretty good I guess we're compatible maybe we'll get married eventually' #LIKE #why #why are people so boring #if it is not love of the most exquisite kind #the far far better thing you do than you have ever done #these people would never go through the bullshit of being with their enemy/a pariah/a difficult Beast/etc. #sshg stories where they're casual actually pain me #it CAN'T be casual it's NOT a casual attraction if they were under normal circumstances it would NEVER happen #SOME THINGS HAVE TO BE FORGED IN FIRE OKAY? #the chasm which has to be crossed for it to happen is what makes it so satisfying my guy #WORK FOR IT #don't get me wrong I like low key ships as well but it's just a fundamentally different thing and some characters #absolutely cannot be plugged into a low key dynamic #Erik categorically cannot be a standard mundane love interest about whom one can be casual #he has never had a casual relationship with literally anything #he is intense about everything he does #this is what makes him wonderful #if you don't want to deal with his dramatic virgin antics then you don't want to write about him #and that's fine! but it means THEN DON'T #writing #romance #tropes

[llycaons]

house truly is a show of contrasts. really ableist and fatphobic but also hitting hard on things related to abelism and faphobia that other shows wouldn't touch, creating some genuinely satisfying moments

#I was mad at foreman during the ep with the homeless woman but chase is also a huge piece of shit #but like it sucks how the happy endings are x pt not actually ever having been schizophrenic and x pt losing weight #so now they're 'normal' #but also house sat down and listened to lucy when ot was clear nobody else would #and jessica's mom was so loving and supportive. and house pointed out how much shame and pressure she must already feel #and that guy who loved his fat wife and thought it was sexy how big she was #like that's genuinely heartwarming to me. being a horifically bullied 10 yr old was not easy #and its not like that would just vanish bc she lost weight and the problems at school weren't her fault anyway #also whenever house talks about his pain and stands up for his use of meds to control it #like yeah. what IS the problem if he needs meds to function and he gets them. do these bitches know what its like to live in chronic pain #house lb

[ereborne]

Song of the Day: May 14

"Diamond on a Landmine” by Billy Talent

#song of the day #buckle up babes this one's a nice showcase of how my brain retains memories which is to say it's a long path to a close destination #in early 2011 when Leverage's season three had recently wrapped #one of my friends was writing a character study piece for Eliot with a partial focus on his toxic relationship with Damien Moreau #and they made a writing playlist for the fic that included this song #(and also 'Laughing with a Mouth of Blood' by St Vincent. absolutely killer song) #and I like the song but for whatever reason I never looked up anything else by Billy Talent #(I was at the time not spending so much time looking up new music but more just letting it come to me #in 2017 St Vincent came out with 'Los Ageless' and I was like oh I know her!! and I started paying attention to her albums #which is good because then in 2021 she released the Daddy's Home album which has 'Pay Your Way in Pain' /and/ 'The Melting of the Sun' #which are absolutely incredible tracks and my life would've been less without them) #and then today I saw a Call of Duty post with lyrics from Billy Talent's 'Afraid of Heights' #and I didn't recognize the lyrics so I went and pulled up the song as how I do #and as it played I was like. do I know this? no. I know something like this. what is it? #and at first I was convinced I'd just been listening to it but then why couldn't I place it? and then I realized I hadn't heard it recently #but I had been /thinking/ about something /related/ to it--which I had been. sort of. there's a Damien Moreau post queued for tomorrow-- #and then in Afraid of Heights the chorus was wrapping up #'you're the only one I'd follow til the end of time / if we fall we fall together baby don't think twice again' #and something clicked and I dragged 'Diamond on a Landmine' up out of the depths of my various-artists folder #it's a great song got an excellent build to it #'alone at last / I can't wait til we're alone at last / all I wanted was a second chance / a second chance / to hold you in my arms at last #and the visual of 'better watch your step / she's a diamond on a landmine' is fantastic #anyway! I made giant scotch eggs with my family's spicy sausage ball mix instead of the normal breading and they're amazing #a good day #two weeks into May already can you imagine

[mindsmade]

fractured my ribs by coughing apparently 🧍‍♂️

#ooc. #the horrors never cease. whooping cough. pneumonia. broken ribs #i've held back on my moaning so far but give me just one second to be a baby and complain about the PAIN SJDFJS #ok i'm normal now. omw to the doc's office for painkillers. will report back if they're gonna make me too loopy to be here LMAO #( also don't @ me for whooping cough ... i didn't realise those vaccines stopped 'working' after 4 - 6 years fsdnmfds ) #medical //

[saintsarefake]

tiktok and tumblr stop stalking the ex victim of a stalker to send him photos of his stalker and re-traumatize him challenge

#also stop saying he's the one in the wrong and stalking his ex-girlfriend to harass her/traumatize her challenge #also also stop glorifying the show challenge #(99.9% of people fail this challenge :00) #bruh it was the most liked comment on a tik tok video saying that he purposely made her uglier than she was (she was an ugly fuck to start) #i don't fat shame normally but i will 100% fat shame that bitch to the point of body dysmorphia and hope she suffers horribly in the future #never the actress tho she was great #if i see ANYONE coming for the actress i'm throwing hands #also darrien i hope he steps on a lego and overdoses on his drugs #actually i wish both experience what it was like for donny all the fear all the pain all the trauma everything i hope they know the sufferi #anyway i just finished baby reindeer and holy SHIT i have never related to a character more since i first saw angel dust #fuck martha and darrien #there's a special place in hell for them #and when i die and go down to hell i'm going to make them wish they were with them six limbed devils #psa; THIS IS ABOUT REAL PEOPLE THEY'RE NOT CHARACTERS #end of my rant now this pissed me off with how people are so hyper focused on martha and everything about her that it makes it seem like sh #+e is the only good person here and the only victim because OF SOME SOPPY FUCKING DUMB STORY AT THE END WHERE HER PARENTS FOUGHT FUCK HER N #+O ONE LOVES YOU AND I HOPE NO ONE EVER LOVES YOU TIK TOK SHE IS NOT THE VICTIM DONNY IS AND YOU ARE ALL TOO DUMB TO REALISE PAST YOUR HYPE #+R FEMENIST ALL MEN ARE EVIL BULLSHIT #*sigh* #i'm fine i swear #i'll delete this later maybe #if i remember it

[wachi-delectrico]

Gonna get spicy for a second and say that everyone loves spewing hate about narcissistic (NPD) parents and how awful parents with personality disorders are, but if someone were to make a post with the exact same cadence about ADHD parents they'd get shot in public at first sight

#rambling #Lemme clarify and extend my point here (cos I feel ppl could really misinterpret this one) #Am I saying people should just accept the abuse of parents if said parents have a personality disorder? No #Am I saying people with ADHD parents have it worse or that both experiences are comparable and exactly the same? No #What I'm saying is that ppl are much more eager to call out abusive or neglectful behaviour from ppl w personality disorders bc #they're seen as 'scary' or 'monstrous' and inherently evil so they have no qualms going full force at it. They think -pd ppl are the devil #But adhd in ppl's general views could never be the source of such pain from a parent to a child; ADHD ppl are seen as childish #and harmless and clueless and silly and tbh a bit stupid. Besides they could never hurt a 'monster' by jumping the gun at -pd ppl right? #'normal people don't have personality disorders so this can't affect me! But normal people can have adhd!' #That's the core of my complaint: one is dehumanised as a destructive monster; the other is as an innocent victim child #And both (parent w -pd & w adhd) can be pretty bad in their own uniqie ways! But such a thing is never considered - for the #societal construct of the child - that neurodivergencies get pushed into - is of an untainted pure inherently clueless being below human #From my exp and the exp of other friends lemme say: having an adhd parent can suck so much ass! Lol #I grew up with two opposing ideals troubling my mind: my mothers obvious overwhelming love; and the shadow her constant absence cast #She loved me so much and did as much as she could; but constantly forgot about my care and my needs and made rash choices #I think about that more and more as i age; especially as i go to doctors over and over for problems i have had since forever #It is an awful feeling to have sink in your heart: how a parent's love isn't enough; how 'maturing quick' isn't a blessing but a curse #As i grew i stopped telling my mom about my needs my school things and my life bc i got used to her forgetfulness and lack of organisation #It meant irregular eating schedules & inadequate meals. In 5th grade I'd eat table scraps at school cos my mom couldn't remember #how I'd tell her over and over that the food had to be in a specific way or it'd get burnt in the school's oven #I'd go to the 'first' dr appointment to deal w an ongoing problem & then she'd forget to schedule the following ones #You get the idea #Kind of a weird post w a strange framing device but I've been thinking about it a lot lately. Smth triggered this thought last night #I'll also never forget a few months ago when i went go a specialist for my hEDS - told her I've known all my life but never got treatment #Also just. The crushing feeling of the dr saying ''you should've gotten your own med team to work ur case since u were young!' #And just. silently nodding & wanting to cry feeling validated but also so hurt looking @ the obvious neglect #Anyways hey how did this therapy session go Doctor

[tamagotchikgs]

been trying to figure out just how i am going to explain how wildly my brain has been altered since the last time i saw my therapist && it make me realize all of this has happened in 1 month,,,,,,,,,,, it feels like . eons. eternity . in the best way possible

#normally everything feels so short #my anxiety just speeds me through it before i can even take a second to enjoy or even experience anything. everything is a dusty blur #but ive been ok #i've actually had good times ive mayb even started 2 feel close to a person for the first time in my life #feel safe w them #anxiety cant get me when im in their shield bubble #listening 2 em talk n even just Exist like woag ur the best thing in this whole world #just bbzbzbzbzbbzz #of course there r also the Horrors that do come w it just due 2 my avpd but . it still feels so different #and i like to ignore those because they make me feel like a monster i am not jealous noo i am so normal i am very normal #i am beating my jealousy side with a stick and i Will win #i have never and Will never act on it #if i ignore it they cant b real #also i do know it's illogical whihc helps #honestly though im used 2 it because ill get jealous if like . a stranger is nice to me and then is nice to some1 else. like oh. oh it was #all a rouse u want me dead u hate me #and it's like. homie. pal. that is normal. they're not abandoning u theyre not trying to set u up for humiliation #theyre just living their life #it's kinda weird tho because i will get feelings like that simultaneously with knowing i am Nothing i am a Horrid beast no one deserves to #even have to see #and knwoing i am not allowed to care about people and there is no shot in hell they will be even nice to me #so it;s just . a lot of things swirling constant;ly #painful emotions all around there is no joy #(except for rn. with them. i can b free from my brain)

[raiiny-bay]

TEETH

#b and a #sorry for lack of sims posting #nano is all-consuming #it's been nice writing every day tbh #& as much as i love kel & co #they're pretty much all i've written for the last ~8 years #so it's nice to take a break from the teenage angst & growing pains #not that writing about grief & loss is really any less mentally taxing #it's actually probably *more* mentally taxing if i'm being honest #but it's allowing me to write in a style i normally don't write in so it's kind of fun #also i just really enjoy this cast of characters. specifically: artie sky & harley #they feel very complex & real. multifaceted. is that the word? maybe. idk

[bonestrouslingbones]

managed to completely curb a whole ass rant about all the Discussion around undertale yellow by getting completely distracted trying to make my guys in another picrew. if any of the 14 of yall are picrew makers or future picrew makers i am begging you right now on my knees to let the characters have foreheads without looking fuckin ugly please. please. please

also a karma attempt bc i never make him and this is probably the closest i will ever get. if he were biblically accurate he would have an undercut and very few bangs and a way fuller beard but i'm working with scraps here man i couldnt even make his post-void design

#yess i KNOW i drew out the main four a while ago but i like to rotate them in my head still. human designs are way more fun im sorryyyy #the forehead thing Pains me btw. the most bangs i ever give edge is like a single little ahoge in the front everything else is slicked back #karma should be darker than fluff's half-white ass but then he would have the same skin tone as edge #which aint a problem except for some reason on karma it just looks like a bad sunburn #they're both just tanned!! please!!! why can you not use normal colors!!!!!! #the first one isn't so bad but i only did russ and stretch bc oh my god the outfit options are simply Not There #not even the backup denim jacket so i could get SOME blue on russ..... aaugh #sigh. at least i can almost always give everyone the horrible eye bags they deserve