#themes and narratives MEAN THINGS

[iamsotiredman]

Why Steddie shippers are VALID

So my sister made a whole ass analysis on why Steddie shippers are not insane for seeing what we saw and I'm just gonna copy paste it below:

Gonna go on a little ramble here but the thing is people weren't pulling shit out of nowhere when they shipped steddie it's not just them looking at two characters and being like oh they'd have a fun dynamic IF we put them in situations because the story itself put them in those situations. If you sit and think about it they would've been the natural direction for the story to have taken. It's not even just the actors' chemistry, the characters themselves were set up in ways that just pushed them together throughout the season. Romantically.

If you look at what we got the season starts off with Steve being jealous of Eddie, refusing to hang out with him and wanting Dustin to stop pestering him. Then it's him not knowing what he wants in terms of romance. His flirting gets sidetracked because in Dustin's words "maybe he should spend less time looking at girls and looking for Eddie" which he then does because the plot itself pushes them together.

When they find Eddie it's Steve that gets shoved up against a wall, making him the first character outside of the kids from the party that Eddie even directly interacts with. And then when he goes missing it's Steve that leads them to skull rock and once more he's the first one Eddie even says anything to when he's found. And even then they share quips about Dustin despite it being something they were stated to be jealous about. Does Steve know shit about mordor? Does he even understand half the shit the man talks about there? nope. but is he the one that states that hey maybe we should be prioritising Eddie's safety instead of jumping headfirst into killing vecna? yup. He hangs back so Eddie can get his shit, which at this point the importance of an alcohol container isn't even much but it's still Eddie's stuff so he does hang back, he waits.

(small note that the other time we saw someone hanging in the background was with lumax, when Max needed to tie her shoelaces and maybe that's not intentional because maybe Sadie just needed to tie her shoelaces but still)

And then when Steve volunteers to jump to find that gate it's Eddie that gets a torch, wraps it up in plastic and hands it over with a goodluck and keeps Steve's sweater with him. And when it seems like Steve's having a moment with his ex it's Eddie that interrupts them with a scoff to give him his battle vest when he could've handed him his leather jacket, when he didn't even need to hand him anything bc Robin was right there and could've handed him her jacket.

The fact that Steve takes it and then hangs back again but this time specifically to be say  thank you for jumping in to help, Eddie deflects it all the way anyone with a crush who wants to not be clocked as having one would do bc "omg it's obvious I was jealous it's obvious Nancy and Steve should be together again" His dialogue here very much is the most I'm outside this circle I shouldn't be butting into this circle but even then the show shows us Steve with chunks of his stomach gone still there trying to comfort and thank and reassure Eddie. Eddie even goes on to make him laugh!! and makes him get flustered!! and they have a heart to heart about Dustin, about being presumptuous of eo and how hey we're cool now and it cements how Eddie really is with the party now.

(Yet another side note but his jealousy could really directly parallel Robins coming out scene so well its almost ridiculous. "Hey Steve I wasn't obsessed with you I was jealous vs Hey Steve I wasn't actually jealous I was obsessed" )

And then they show little moments of them celebrating together when they succeed in contacting Dustin, they show them whining to eo about the tiny boy they've self appointed to take care of. And even when they're out of the upside down for a while they're just constantly near eo in every frame? it's one of those oh even if they're not the focus rn they just gravitate towards eo things.

They have Eddie hot wire a trailer but even then they have Steve hovering over him getting trusted with the knowledge of Eddie's shitty father and not only is it a glimpse of Eddie's life but it's also a glimpse of just how shit this situation is for the boy and the scene ends with Steve being flirted with!!! and made to drive the vehicle eddie got them.

And I know this is Steve telling Nancy this but his dream? his dream is having a family and someone to be with him and coparent with him and the entire season we've been shown how good Eddie is with the kids, how Eddie is known for taking in kids that don't fit and need protection and giving them a place to be themselves. The fact that Steve specifically talking about having a gigantic vehicle to troop into when seconds before Eddie got him that vehicle.

(Honestly just a side note but this would be the most wholesome development too because Steve comes from a neglectful "perfect" family and he thought he'd want that too but with love and instead he gets this insane and messy found family, with people who love and adore him and its a great way to subvert the trope and a great arc for a character who began his story being the rich douchebag jock.)

Even after that when Steve sits with Robin and talks about romance and how he gets that it's not the most important priority and he has hope still and it really could've just focused on Nancy if that's all they wanted but it also shows Dustin and Eddie playing around and goofing off.

(Small side note again is how even when Nancy is sitting there talking to max she's still making weapons she's thinking about defeating vecna but Eddie even when he does makes weapons, and his weapon matches Steve's for fucks sake, he makes it a game he's playing with the kids and unwinding them).

And when they start their plan it's still Steve that hangs back and specifically tells Eddie he doesn't have to be a hero and they should stay safe, the both of them. And even when he turns to leave Eddie still calls him back the way romantic pairings do for goodluck except here they're not a thing yet and he just says give them hell.

All this to say is that my point is that even if you  take away how Joe Quinn played Eddie (and that's not to say he didn't do a phenomal fucking job), take away how he was all up in Steve's face and how they looked at eo like that, it's still the way a romantic pair gets set up, it's still the narrative pushing them together. It is not wrong of queer people to have seen a story centering a freak being hunted, see him accepted, see him in situations where if he was a girl this would've definitely lead to romance and then being upset when it didn't happen.

I thought I'd already said everything I had wanted to about this season but then I realised that queer people seeing steddie and shipping them together have been downplaying Steve and Eddie's interactions because of how we're constantly never thought of possibly being represented and we're constantly being told its just us seeing it and how one frame with two ppl of the same gender makes us crazy shippers when in reality the narrative really well and truly did set it up.

I'm tired of seeing queer people beat themselves up and disclaimer themselves because heterosexuals would shrug off any kind of romance between anyone that isn't a man and a woman because it wasn't explicitly spelled out for them, or shown in their standards of how a Queer relationship would've been. It is gay, it was gay and it will be gay regardless of the homophobic writers, regardless of what heterosexuals think and we aren't wrong for seeing it and wanting it.

#steddie #eddie munson #Steve Harrington #stranger things season 4 spoilers #stranger things vol 2 spoilers #cause she's so right?? #we r just looking at the narrative and drawing the natural conclusion #themes and narratives MEAN THINGS #like we r not crazy!! #we saw what was on screen what the narrative was playing at and thought Oh okay #all I'm saying is. I've seen so many fans being so horribly homophobic and making fun of queer ppl for liking this ship and shipping it #and it's so fucked up #we aren't wrong for thinking this #the formatting is so fucked hold on

[kaurwreck]

Atsushi canonically isn't kind by nature (see Wan ch. 19), but that's okay because you don't have to be motivated by kindness to choose kindness, which is why Atsushi is the narrative's beautiful princess with a disorder anyway.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd atsushi #atsushi's brilliance is absent inherent meaning and kindness and bravery he chooses those things anyway #it his strength and why he's the protagonist #and why his role in the narrative is so so so salvific #it's also a theme in his irl works #if you dont have meaning or kindness at home storebought is fine

[gayofthefae]

Jopper: You can find love again after being divorced.

Duzie: Love isn’t about social status and the validation of having a partner but rather things like common interests and love of each other’s company.

Stobin: Your “true love” doesn’t have to be a romantic one and you can be entirely fulfilled by a best friend.

Jancy: Love and family does not need to be the focus of your life. You can have those things while still being career driven and oriented.

ElMike: Romantic and platonic love are not hierarchal. Sometimes one relationship is closer and better as friends than as lovers. (similar to Stobin but rather than exchanging a friend for a romantic partner, shifting the nature of one relationship)

Lumax: A loving and supporting relationship is more important than the social disapproval that may come with it. (similar to Duzie but with higher stakes of racist consequences rather than just a lack of societal approval, an active disapproval)

Byler: Queer people are just as deserving of love and romance and do not need to settle for platonic relationships if they want more.

#ship analysis #stranger things #themes #narrative arcs #sorry but 'even bullied kids can eventually find the societally accepted picket fence life' just doesn't fit #there is nothing wrong with that irl but as far as narrative themes go it doesn't fit into this show #the one that does a nature of their relationship shift #which also inherently means stop being toxic antis and saying they shouldn't have any relationship at all #byler #jopper #platonic stobin #platonic elmike #lumax #duzie #dustin x suzie #jancy #character arcs

[writeouswriter]

You ever have a major breakthrough on your WIP and write it ALL down and then idk, just black out and completely forget it ever happened until you stumble across it however many months or whatever later and are like hey, wtf, this solves everything, when did I write this, I'm a genius, I'm an idiot, I've known this for ages, I've just learned this now, what is happening

#writing #writeblr #writer things #yeah found a note on my computer i did not remember existing #and it has the answer to one of the main plot things i've been struggling to figure out for like a year or 2 #and i made it in f-ckin january what #little shoemaking elves up in my laptop moved onto writing instead #I mean it doesn’t solve everything but it’s a major theme I’d forgotten that definitely helps focus the narrative

[rabarbarzcukrem]

"Noé" being the name of the biblical savior of all life.

"Vanitas" meaning vanity, futility, something that is ultimately meaningless and doesn't last. I am unwell.

#there is also this interesting thing going on where their dynamic clearly represents the conflict between selfishness and selflessness #but vanitas ends up being the successful savior despite doing it for his own benefit #while noé fails to save the people he actually cares about time and time again #I'm very curious about how they're gonna handle the theme of salvation and what it really means #I think it's implied that killing vanitas would be an act of salvation for him #when his formula gets rewritten to the point he's no longer himself #but chloe d'apchier's storyline seems to kind of contradict the notion that death is the answer and a perfect escape #and with how vanitas views himself as a lost cause already... wouldn't it be nice if they kind of turned it around #like no. you don't get to die. you need to life and that's harder #because I think showing a character who doesn't see a future for themselves and has given up on hope #be forced to confront the fact that that's not the case at all. that there is in fact hope for them #would be more interesting that simply proving them right #<<me delusional about a character that's clearly doomed by the narrative #vnc #the case study of vanitas #moje

[ericas-spop-blog]

This is a scrap - and should be read as a criticism of the story telling moreso than of the (fictional) characters - but...

One of the results of Season 4 framing Adora as purely a victim of "crazy ex" Glimmer - Presenting it as if Glimmer was reacting to nothing, that Adora wasn't controlling or jealous or secretive - is that it deeply undercuts the idea that Adora treats Catra badly because She Just Doesn't Know Better.

If Adora treats Glimmer in the same (bad) ways she treated Catra, then it tells us she has flawed assumptions about what a "good" relationship looks like; that her behaviour (if not innocent) is at least sincere, and that she is continuing to apply bad models even in a situation where it does not benefit her(or anyone but Shadow Weaver). Having these models fail her would drive the character towards self-examination and personal growth.

But if Glimmer was the core problem in Season 4 - if Adora was nothing but supportive, even when the circumstances of her youth are recreated nearly 1-to-1 - then we're saying that Adora is already perfect, that actually she does know how to have normal, healthy relationships even under trying circumstances.

Which makes her refusal to extend that care to Catra incredibly suspect. Does she think that Catra is uniquely unworthy of respect?

Or does she just know that other people think Catra is unworthy of respect, and aren't going to say shit (especially when they still need She-Ra to save them)?

========================

Look, obviously none of this is the intended read; And fwiw, I think that at least the script of Season 4 actually does show Adora replicating her bad behaviours -

being high-handed, controlling, jealous of Glimmer's relationship with Shadow Weaver, and unhealthily invested in her role as The Hero -

and then has those flaws drive personal growth - reflecting on if she is making things worse, recognizing that her idea of being A Hero is to be a weapon in someone else's hands and explicitly rejecting that -

but that this is undermined by the directorial lens overwhelmingly framing Glimmer as The Villain (and thus Adora as In The Right/The Victim/Smol Bean), and that this conflict drives these really ugly implications.

In absolving Adora, the story inadvertently validates her beliefs - even the ones that it set up as false and harmful. Which, yeah, creates the implication that Adora knows when she's acting badly, but just doesn't care (and that we shouldn't either). That her status as "Good" protects her from criticism, and allows her to cast any opposition as defacto "Bad" and not worthy of acknowledgment or examination.

#spop #scraps #s4 cinemanarrative dissonance #meta #i guess? #again this is about the storytelling #the ways that the show undercuts its own themes #because it wanted to criticize and deconstruct heroic narratives #but also uncritically use them in traditional ways #so you get these problems #where Adora needs character growth #but is constantly denied it #because the narrative lens can't confront #that her shit just stinks #without trying to soften or excuse it #oh and don't get me started on how *incoherent* the villainization of Glimmer was #'stop running off alone by which i mean join planned missions with other people' #like this is just straight up “Adora acuses Glimmer of her own canonical flaws” #without even bothering to show Glimmer actually doing these things

[good-wine-and-cheese]

I know a lot of peoples big AU hates are like soulmate AU or coffee shop AU but I gotta say actor AU is the worst of them for me

#personal #UNLESS. unless it is done for the gag. for the funny. #like authors being known for having the same character design across a bunch of series? thats a funny one to play actor AU with. #or if it plays on the actual themes of the narrative somehow then those can be good too #I more mean straightforward actor AUs #I know a lotta people like them its just not my thing #introducing celebrity culture into my narratives is not what I would call a good time

[buckttommy]

I don't think 9-1-1 is in the business of killing off mains but I get the feeling something catastrophic is coming Buck's way and it's not going to be the car incident

#Time is a central theme that unites and binds Buck and Eddie but it is a theme that has been attributed to Eddie for the most part via #dialogue/context/circumstance/etc. #But last night Lev specifically mentions the concept of time in relation to happiness; not to Eddie this time but to Buck #in a way that simply cannot be mistrued or extrapolated or taken to mean or be associated with anyone else #Kind of makes me wonder about Buck's mental/emotional trajectory as well. Last season he clung to Taylor because he was afraid #of being left again. Understandable since he lost three key people in his life within a matter of months. #But they came back. And then Taylor was gone. And Buck's not clinging anymore but he's not happy either #so why the connection between Buck and Time? It's been so effectively established but why establish it at all? #Does he feel like Taylor was his last chance at the life he wanted? Wife. Kids. Happiness #(or at least some approximation of it) #That would put Lev's words into an even greater perspective: how he had this Thing that Buck actively desires and craves and it still #wasn't enough. #This thing that leaves Buck wondering 'if he had it all and it wasn't enough what will be enough?' #The question is: does he have the time to figure it out? #Because Buck might feel like *his* time js running out in the same way all human beings feel like there is never enough time #to heal the way they want to heal / achieve what they want to achieve / be who they want to be... #But Buck is a character trapped within a narrative he has no choice but to dance to #and that narrative is feeling so. Damning these days. #He feels like he doesn't have time but I'm willing to bet he has even less time than he thinks he has.

[anotherpapercut]

I know several people who like LOVE seasons 5-7 (11th doctors run) and think the storylines and moffats writing are brilliant and I don't get it!!! what am I missing??? why does literally every single episode have the exact same stakes: Rory/Amy/the doctor is dead. forever. so dead. but wait!!! what if they aren't!!! why do so many of the explanations for why they're not actually dead feel so rushed like they were added at the last minute!! why does every single queer character act kind of weird and awkward about being queer!! why does the doctor casually say that women are inferior when no one's around!!! what the fuck!! hello!!!

#why is rory continuously proving himself as the Only Man To Ever Exist only for the characters/narrative to continuously imply hes lesser #amy tries to kiss the doctor?? at her wedding?????? #when amy is stuck for 36 years why is she like i forgot how much rory loved me?? GIRL HE WAITED 1000 YEARS FOR YOU???? WHAT???? #he is CONSTANTLY the butt of the joke despite being unequivocally without a doubt the best character from this era #what the fuck was up with river being their kid #THE 50TH ANNIVERSARY???? WHAT?? THAT SHIT WAS WEIRD RIGHT??? #does anyone else find it annoying that moffat changed the opening theme and the tardis and the sonic and the doctor ALLLL at once #and then retconned the entire storyline the early seasons are based off of?? #WHY IS THE DOCTOR SO GODDAMN ANNOYING?? LIKE SO MUCH MORE ANNOYING THAN THE OTHERS #and fucking sexist!!! so sexist!!! #anyone remember the characters who were like 'were the short fat and tall skinny gay men why do we need names' LIKE HUH??????? #gay people still have names steven 😭 #i feel like im going insane bc i have no one else to talk to abt it until my partner catches up #but you guys still think these seasons kinda suck right? like coming off of martha and DONNA and her AMAZING storyline #these just kinda pale in comparison right?????? #the last centurion is probably the last really good plot of that era imo. none of the other plots come close to having an ending that cool #like rivers story couldve been amazing and then it was just uh. kinda weird. a bit confusing IDK #i dont want to be a dick when talking to people and like shit on smth they love but i genuinely have a hard time #finding kind things to say abt a lot of this era #also and this might just be me but i do not like amy and clara v much 😭 theyre so fuckin mean and not even funny #why were martha donna and rose sooooo well written and they all have rich backstories. we know their fuckin families!! #literally its never even fully explained what the fuck happened to amys parents 😩😩 they just move on. the only friend of theirs #ever shown is fucking river??? as a kid?? #am i the only one who found all thay confusing

[obstinaterixatrix]

I really like romances that highlights a complex relationship with desire. what’s that one quote. found it, it’s the siken quote that goes “the enormity of my desire disgusts me” and “there’s only one thing I want, don’t make me say it” LOVE that. it’s so fun. denial and repression and self-loathing! some of my favorite ingredients for a romance.

#time to talk the romos #it can show up in any narrative in many ways #but the way in romance it pulls another person into the process #is SOOOOO fun for me #with romance being character-focused and with the plot tied to emotional/relationship development #(when it’s done well) you get to see it in both an individual and systemic context #how it manifests in solitude and its impact on relationship patterns #how it’s masked or displayed #whether the character is aware or unaware #whether the character is trying to break these patterns or are furiously clinging to them #fight or flight lol #anyway that’s why I just ended up rotating that one single father bl in my head for so long #I feel like writing-wise I’m kind of lukewarm on it? but themes-wise it grabbed me by the throat and shook me like a rattle #the love interest’s whole thing is how at his core he wants affection but has only gotten it through dysfunctional means #because what he’s wanted has always been dismissed or rejected or minimalized for the sake of someone else #well yknow he’s an orphan and was taken in by his maternal uncle so there’s always been resentment if he does better than the ‘actual’ son #so the pattern is #starting from his cousin and his cousin’s girlfriend #is seeing affection and going ‘I want that’ and ‘stealing’ another person’s partner #and then instantly being disinterested because if it’s so easily ‘stolen’ it’s not the affection he actually wants #and since it continues outside of that context of. well essentially revenge #it just continues into solely experiencing unfulfilling relationships #so when the love interest recognizes his own interest in the main character #he’s trying to continue his cycle of ‘surely if I sleep with this person I’ll lose interest’ except by this point *that’s* the self-delusion #he’s found a person that he connects with and with whom he wants a genuine relationship #and it’s devastating to him!!!!!! #lmao I love it

[azuresquirrel]

DUNMESHI ENDING IN SEPTEMBER?????

#Dungeon Meshi #Dunmeshi #I mean obviously the narrative was heavily showing signs of wrapping up in ch. 95 #but NEXT MONTH that's so soon!!! #the manga has been so heavy on the theme of things having a natural lifespan #and the difficult but necessary need to let things go #but also my stupid lesbian ass is getting the bottles ready saying 'HERE'S HOW FARCILLE CAN STILL WIN'

[paragal]

Day 7: 30-Day SMP Jack my evil little communist dictator

#he's a murderer he's a mean girl he's a communist he's a dictator he's a visionary he's bisexual #he's a villain he's the main character he's transgender he's covered in blood #the ultimate ‘doomed by the narrative’ character #the thing I love most about him in this series is that he’s the main character AND the main villain #this is the only smp where he was taken seriously #he wrote his manifesto in Charlie’s blood #I loveee his skin for 30day smp sooo much he makes me insane #all the versions of jack get slightly different haircuts I’ve decided #30 day smp jack gets an undercut #modeled him after sad men in the 60’s who smoke and cry about the war and being gay #insane about him #he was the one who set up the entire theme of communism #and he was the only person to kill someone #(the Phil and Wilbur deaths were both indirect) #30 days smp #free trial smp #30 day smp #30 days hardcore smp #mcyt #mcyt fanart #jack manifold #jack manifold fanart #c!jack #c!jack fanart #c!jack manifold #c!jack manifold fanart #jack manifold art #manifold may #blood tw #smoking tw

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

there are a lot of reasons i think pericles is really slept on as one of the most tragic characters in sdmi, and they start with how easy it is to connect the dots that he took a mind-destroying curse full to the face as an infant. one that breaks adult humans and renders them unrecognizable, when pericles was not only a baby but is from a species that is explicitly much more vulnerable to it. right from the beginning of his life the entity obliterated his sense of self so thoroughly that there's not even a version of him who shows up in the Sitting Room.

fuck, man.

#sdmi #scooby doo mystery incorporated #professor pericles #sdmi is fundamentally a show about the cycle of trauma and abuse--about breaking a very literal generational curse #and i think it does a real disservice to both that theme #and pericles' narrative specifically #that he gets painted as That One Guy Who's Just Evil and Abusive for No Reason #when everyone else gets the benefit of 'even thoroughly horrible people are still people' #'and that doesn't mean they didn't hurt you; or that you have to let them keep hurting you' #'or that you're obliged to proceed in a way allowing for the possibility they'll decide to stop. that's on them to do. and they might not.' #even w/o the systemic oppression or decades of torture and psychiatric abuse #pericles was a victim of the entity in genuinely and quite possibly the most thorough way of them all. and yet he made a lifetime worth of #choices and many many many of them were to harm people in horrific ways; to his own ends and for his own satisfaction #and like. what do you do with that. #it is difficult and uncomfortable to sit with that and draw conclusions from it that are neither 'his trauma means none of that counts' #nor 'okay yeah well he's a victim BUT HE DID BAD THINGS SO THAT DOESN'T MATTER FUCK HIM' #if there's any show that invites you to do that it's sdmi; i love that about it. but you can't leave pericles out w/o defeating the purpose #especially when the nature of his being a link in the cycle of abuse is critical context for exploring the trauma of his victims #the vast majority of what he does to ricky is very clearly projecting and reenacting his own trauma onto a vulnerable target #and just. aaaaahhhhhh i have so many feelings about it god #abuse cw #grooming cw #SDMItag

[1o1percentmilk]

something that bothers me is my inability to see people as people and rather more as a collection of themes/motifs/objects/skills

#guy building a machine out of people #my insane 'everything in real life is a narrative actually' and 'my life has themes and motifs' type thinking #is it a meaningful narrative? does it have the structure of a typical narrative? not necessarily. thats not the point anyways #i just can't help but think about the meaning of a person rather than the person itself #its not any sort of solipsism type thing or something stupid like that i dont entertain such thoughts and even it it was #i dont particularly mind #it only bothers me because i think it makes me less competent at providing good care for human beings #cw unreality #< not really but just in case #dunno how to talk abt this with people imean i'll try to and maybe that'll make me feel less insane abt it #and actually if u do have thoughts let me know because i genuinely hate this aspect abt me

[secret--history]

I know that 'The Secret History is a satire' is an extremly prevalent take, and I think it came about as a response to the idea that tsh "romanticises" things like classist ideas/substance abuse/murder, but like. It can be unsupportive or critical of the characters without being a satire. Satire is not the word you're looking for here

#tsh #the secret history #And frankly in my opinion it is also an incredibly boring and reductive interpretation anyway #Like. There's so much else to chew on here. #Fate. the ancient vs modern digression vs obsession dichotomy happening. Identity/loss of self. #The immortality/death/ghost/memory thing. The unreliable narration. #The way their paths notably shape them but remain illusory. Fate. #You're missing out on so much if you only interpret it as a satire. #And frankly. Satire is a specific thing that is not this. #Like you can argue that ONE of the things happening is an intentional criticsim of the characters but #a. That's not automatically the same as satire b. That's not the only thing happening #c. You could debate whether 'criticsim' is really the word to use here anyway #As opposed to like. Being self aware of and intentional about the characters flaws and #using them to further illustrate and exlore the stories themes. #Like. You wouldn't call blood meridian a 'satire' just because the narrative is 'critical' of the judge. #That's not how anything works. Having flawed/amoral characters does not mean #you have to make the entire point of the work into a denunciation of them.

[suffarustuffaru]

i just. remembered again that i have a fembaru fic but also the premise is. Very Messed Up hah and also it was written before the canon genderbent au with its official genderbend names for everyone so its also outdated on top of that T^T i had like. Genderqueer subtext going on too. but i also wrote this fic like almost two years ago and havent touched it in forever so im unsure if i should go back to it…. o.o but i would love to finish it one day if only for my own satisfaction hah… i had a very detailed outline for ch 2 (its a twoshot) and several scenes written already anyway!! (and also i would probably update those names, make minor edits, etc etc hmm…)

#just thinking about this wip again………… mmmm….. not super confident in my older ao3 fics but the premise for this one was like. i think i #ended up brainstorming it with a friend or two and then i was like wait holy shit howd this play out. and then i took about two weeks to #write ch1? :o #and then i like. REALLY got into revolutionary girl utena after finishing ch1 so like that def bled into um. the themes. #just. thimking…….. bc ive had so many ideas to explore like. themes regarding gender and misogyny and Choice and destiny and queerness and #all sorts of things….. bc rezero Touches on them and is even Detailed on them sometimes and id Love to go in depth. but im also a bit #nervous to bc 1. writing fic is….. so much work sometimes fr and i am but a lazy writer and 2. the slight anxiety of what if i get flamed #o.o wild to think about….. #like. i have ideas for emilia fics that are. definitely darker maybe a bit controversial but i will go off the walls with writing for the #sake of answering the questions of. can this be done. and is it possible to narratively critique canon and fandom treatment of emilia. that #sort of thing. #not that im the best writer ever akdbdnd but i do like darker fiction sometimes. and i also like being meta about things in fiction. and i #also like writing to get out a tiny bit of salt. etc etc. #i tried to write these kinds of thinngs with my atm sole emilia centric fic that i wrote. uhhh more than a year ago? and i would love to try #again one day bc ive def improved and changed as a writer since then. u know what i mean?? :o #just like. rezero and queerness is very interesting to me. #suffaru post #saving this on the blog bc i talked Too Much about my writing process here HAH #my writing process being: HOW FAR CAN I TAKE THIS IDEA AND HOW OFF THE WALLS CAN IT GET???? #in reality tho im really just a massive nerd whos gone down a massive rabbit hole of writing anime fanfic. 😭😭😭😭😭🙏🙏 #if you actually read all these tags big thank you HAH