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mimzy-writing-online · 4 years

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10/10/10 Tag Game

Thank you to @emdop for tagging me in this. This is their tag game here

How it works, answer ten questions your tagger gave you, make ten new questions and tag ten new people to answer.

1. For any of your OCs: What’s their favorite drink?

Ulric: black coffee or cappuccino for a treat

Anna: Earl Grey tea

Felix: English Breakfast tea

2. What very specific thing do you like to write the most?

The scene when two characters sit down and talk, opening up to each other

3. Favorite Tropes?

Friends to lovers, slow burn friendship, slow burn romance, found family,

4. Least Favorite Tropes?

Enemies to Lovers with no friend stage,

5. What is something you’ve always wanted to write?

A Witch’s Memory is something I’ve wanted to write for the longest time, but other projects I think about a lot:

A whimsical magic in a completely different world. A Witch’s Memory is only a different version of our modern world, one where magic is normalized like science and technology. I want to write something in a fantasy world that completely turns everything we know upside down, with climates and natural environments only from our wildest dreams and an era that is only partially recognizable in its fashion and technology, pulling from every era into a wonderful cluster of confusion and fascination.

Soft-fantasy novel set in the 1990′s with 90′s era technology, libraries and librarian aesthetic, dragons, witches,

Most recently I’ve also been playing with the idea of a steampunk royalty story with a romance plot.

6. Do you make playlists for your WIP ideas?

Yes, and they usually either a “if this book was a movie this would be its soundtrack with this song for this specific scene” or it’s a “this would be this character’s personal playlist of favorite songs”. Anna, Ulric, and Felix have their own playlists.

7. When you’re having trouble writing, how do you inspire yourself?

I also make a pinterest folder for my WIP ideas, and A Witch’s Memory has its own board for its world building as well as a board for Anna, Ulric, and Felix. I look at that when I’m stuck and don’t know how to start or continue a scene.

If I’m drafting, I look back at my outline and work through what I have planned. Sometimes I have to deviate from the outline a little and figure out a way to reconnect back, or alter it altogether.

If I’m very stuck I go back to other works of fiction that have inspired me in the past, specific for that story. That includes rewatching them, rereading them, listening to soundtracks or looking at fan art.

I get out of the house and spend some time with a friend. My friend (A) and I usually work through a story problem by talking it out. (K) usually distracts me and takes me to random places. Sometimes I call or message (C) because she lives far away and we talk. They all help.

8. Where do your WIP ideas typically come from?

“I really like this story, but I kind of wish it went differently, involved these tropes, had this world building, had these characters, etc.”

Nothing is really original, no matter how far back in fiction you go. Everything is inspired from something else, so for me what I do is find the aspects of fiction I love most and see what I would do with them personally.

Example: witches are cool, but if it takes place in the modern world then it has to be a secret and humans can never know, but if it takes place in a hard-fantasy historical world then everyone knows about magic and has access to it somehow. - - - > And it becomes the whole premise for this world I built

Example: why do werewolves hate being werewolves? And why must they blackout during a full moon and go total beast? And they’re either always alone or there’s this whole alpha pack thing which isn’t technically true of real wolves - - - > and it becomes a thing that werewolves are proud of being werewolves, they easily form bonds and friendships with other people, even non-werewolves, and when the full moon comes around werewolves run in a group as a fun activity, something they enjoy

Example: Amnesia makes for an interesting story, but it’s not very realistic when you know actual medical stuff, and it’s always one-sided so people are always trying to make their loved one remember or trying to “reconnect” in the exact same way they did before - - - > Which lead me to amnesia through magic curse and mutual loss of memory, forgetting the entire friendship, so now they genuinely start from scratch

Example: Long distant pen-pals is a popular trope, especially since the invention of the internet, but every time I see it, it involves people who have met in real life even if it was only for a moment and they never knew it / didn’t give each other enough information to figure it out. - - - > It turns into, they couldn’t possibly have known each other before, they live in different parts of the world, but they want to meet one day, and then by a twist of fate (or meddling) they do meet

9. If your OC was a breakfast food, what would they be?

Felix: unsweetend English Breakfast tea and jam toast: When I say jam toast, I mean his humor is a little dry like toast, but he’s still enjoyable company, sweet if he wants to be. He can also be a little bitter sometimes, the kind of person you need to know a little bit before you develop a taste for it

Anna: Earl Grey tea and honey on an English Muffin: she’s calming company but complex like the flavor of earl grey tea. As for the English Muffin, it’s a joke that she’s English-adjacent, not actually British. She spent her first eight years in America and then lived in the U.K. with Felix’s family for the next eight until their family moved to America. Her accent is slightly changed and she uses some U.K. English vocab instead of American English, so most people think she’s British. English muffins aren’t actually English. They’re an American breakfast food based on crumpets.

Ulric: A cinnamon roll and cold butter. This is a weird one. I think if you met Ulric and got to know him, he’d be someone you’d want to protect. He’s polite, kind, and shy. Life keeps throwing him lemons (literally throwing, between his emotionally abusive father and suddenly being blind, dealing with new anxiety/depression after going blind, etc) but Ulric’s just trying to do his best. Absolute cinnamon roll. But that’s not a something he’d let you see. Most people don’t know about that part of his life, so he’s like cold butter. He’s friendly but it takes a while for him to warm up and soften those walls to let you in.

Mason (Ulric’s best friend, who I must add): sweetened coffee - very energetic and hyper, a sweetheart of a friend. There’s no coffee-bitterness, by this I mean that it’s easy to enjoy his friendship, you don’t need to develop a taste for it like you do with black coffee. (Mason is also a precious cinnamon roll if you ask me)

10. Explain one of your WIP ideas in the most ridiculous way possible?

I’m going to do this AO3 tagging system style

A Witch’s Memory

Multi, T, Graphic Depictions of Violence

Anna St. Claire & Ulric Matthews, Anna St. Claire & Felix Robbins, Felix Robbins & Ulric Matthews, Felix Robbins/Hayden Watson

Anna St. Claire, Ulric Matthews, Felix Robbins, Mason Shepherd, Elmsley St. Claire, Veronica St. Claire, Hayden Watson, Katarina Matthews, Tobias Matthews,

Memory Curse, Amnesia, Pen-Pals, Found Family, Adoptive Family, Slow Burn Friendship, Enemies to Friends, Platonic Soulmates, M/M Slow Burn Romance

Disability, Blind Character, Bisexual Character, Three Bi Disasters, Trans Character, Elmsley is trans, Elmsley is a Good Uncle, Tobias Matthew’s Terrible Parenting, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Emotional Abuse

Magic, Witches, Werewolves, Werewolf Ulric, Witch Anna, Witch Felix,

Graphic Violence is only in two scenes, two different characters get punched, and there’s some blood

Tagging: @snowblossim @thephantomofwriting @novel-scribe @the-moving-finger-writes @sapphoopages @owlsofstarlight @mayvinwrites @belles-library @maggie-wolff-writes @thewritingpirate

Your Ten Questions:

1. What’s your favorite trope to read but not to write? Or vice versa, to write but not read?

2. Some of your favorite aesthetics?

3. Ideal writing environment? (Time, place, sound, drink/snacks)

4. What’s your favorite side character in your WIP?

5. How would your OCs interact with your favorite characters from other works?

6. An embarrassing fact about your OC that they would never tell anyone?

7. What book do you think should be made into a movie?

8. What’s the last mean thing you did to your OCs?

9. Write an Incorrect Quotes post between your OCs

10. I’m stealing from emdop too! Explain one of your WIPs in the most ridiculous way possible?

#writeblr #writing community #WIP #tag game #writing #A Witch's Memory #my wip

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the-jennnster · 5 years

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Novel Prep: Stars

I was tagged by @arynneva!

First Look

1. Describe your novel in 1-2 sentences (elevator pitch)

A criminal and the mechanic she’s kidnapped start out on what seems to be a short adventure, but as they get to know each other, secrets are revealed and enemies are met, forcing them into a fight with their country in the balance.

2. How long do you plan for your novel to be? (Is it a novella, single book, book series, etc.)

This is (I hope) the first in a trilogy, with a couple stories expanding off of it because there are some side characters in here whom I think definitely deserve to have their stories told.

3. What is your novel’s aesthetic?

Secrets admitted at midnight underneath the stars while avoiding all the shit of the world around you.

4. What other stories inspire your novel?

@marielubooks‘s Legend Trilogy was definitely a major inspiration. Cee, one of my main characters, is basically the Day/June lovechild lmao

ALSO HOW COOL IS IT THAT THERE’S GONNA BE A BOOK 4? AHHHH

5. Share 3+ images that give a feel for your novel

(All of these images were stolen from Pinterest btw)

6. Who is your protagonist?

I have two!

Cee - A criminal who’s supposedly ruthless and cruel and has a dark past she hides from everything.

Kyle - A mechanic who is working his ass off to support his family and isn’t used to doing things for himself

7. Who is their closest ally?

Besides each other, Cee and Kyle rely a lot on the Specialists later on in the book. Among these Specialists, the most important people are:

-Sixilia, a mischievous assassin whose past is dangerously intertwined with Cee’s

-Cat, a disgraced noble hardened by the struggles she’s gone through as both a trans woman and a mutate (my version of mutants lol)

-Blake, a hyperactive, happy-go-lucky disgraced soldier

-Hanna, a ex-gang member who’s lost everyone in her life, including her parents and girlfriend (who she was planning to marry)

8. Who is their enemy?

Daniela, a seventeen-year-old world-renowned genius, corrupted by an international organization hell-bent on destroying the American government.

9. What do they want more than anything?

Cee just wants to escape her past and be her own person, independent of the reputations she’s been forced to uphold in both the lives she’s led

Kyle just wants his family to be safe, to honor his mother’s memory, to let his sister live a life with choices, and to just be able to live.

10. Why can’t they have it?

Because Cee is burdened by the reputation of the infamous, cruel criminal she’s shaped herself out to be in her quest for respite and Kyle is struggling to work around the shitty governmental systems that make it difficult for a teenage boy to support his depressed, disabled father and toddler sister.

11. What do they wrongly believe about themselves?

Cee believes that she’s undeserving of love because of the things she’s gone through and the things she’s been forced to do in her life as a criminal and Kyle thinks his chance for a life outside of supporting his family is shot, seeing as he dropped out of school and has lost his chance at his own dreams.

12. Draw your protagonist! (Or share a description)

Cee and Kyle were actually drawn by @hestray, who I am very lucky to have! She’s my sounding board and listens to my ramble about this all the time!

Plot Points

13. What is the internal conflict?

The internal conflict revolves a lot about family, about what we owe to them and what we owe to ourselves. There’s also some classic morality about the value of life and death, and a sexuality crisis in there too for good measure.

14. What is the external conflict?

Daniela and her army, trying to dismantle the government, which would do the exact opposite of what she wants to do: put mutates on equal playing grounds with regular humans

15. What is the worst thing that could happen to your protagonist?

For Cee, if you told her that her brothers hated her, if you told her that her brothers had always hated her, if they told her they hated her... she’d be utterly wrecked she is utterly wrecked

Kyle would be a mess if somebody took his sister from him. Four years, he’s been fighting to keep her, to provide for her and give her a good life, giving up his own in the process. If she was taken from him, everything he’d done would be for nothing, and he’d be an absolute mess.

16. What secret will be revealed that changes the course of the story?

Cee’s real identity is a big one, because it’s a lot about her connections to Daniela and how big of a role she really plays in this whole “destroy the government” scheme.

17. Do you know how it ends?

Couple schemes, a few screaming matches, and a death that I hopes rocks people to their cores. I’d like to say I’ve got a decent idea, though things have changed.

Bits and Bobs

18. What is the theme?

I said this before for number 13, but it’s really about what we owe to our families and what we owe to ourselves. Cee and Kyle have very different approaches to their families, but both of them have made drastic decisions revolving around them. They each need to learn the balance between making decisions for their families and making decisions for themselves.

19. What is a reoccurring symbol?

The first one off the top of my head would be Cee’s hair, which in the beginning is long as a symbol to her freedom (because when she was young, it was kept short for practicality). At one point, she chops it off as a show that she’s given up that freedom and is back to working under someone’s thumb.

20. Where is the story set? (Share a description!)

The story is set in 2364, in a post-WWIII American Empire. The soldiers who fought in the war twenty years prior are traumatized and injured and their own children were genetically mutated thanks to the nuclear weaponry used during the fighting, causing them to grow up feared and discriminated against thanks to the deadly abilities that followed.

21. Do you have any images or scenes in your mind already?

I have a ton of scenes in my mind and nearly a hundred pages written for just this iteration (which is the fourth so far). This isn’t even counting all the expansions I’ve scribbled down between drafts.

22. What excited you about this story?

I’m really excited to tell these characters’ stories, first and foremost! Each of them, the main characters and the Specialists, have a lot that they’ve gone through and a lot to tell the world about it.

It’s also a test of my abilities to write heavier topics. Cee in particular has gone through a lot of shit, so it’s new ground for me to be tackling some of this stuff, and I hope I do it justice and write it in a way that allows people to understand this kind of stuff.

23. Tell us about your usual writing method!

Usually writing for me starts with whatever idea’s in my head for the moment. If it’s a scene I’ve been bouncing around for a while, it might have a song on my playlist, which I’ll then play over and over and over until the scene’s written to my liking.

Props to anyone who actually read the whole post lmfao. It’s a lot of my own bullshit, but if you’re actually interested in my story and characters, I’m begging you to let me know! Always craving that validation

NOW FOR TAGS!

@thegirlfairytalesforgot is the only one I can think of at the moment, but if any of my lovely followers have a passion project they’re working on, feel free to do the challenge and tag me when you post it! I’m always looking to read other peoples’ ideas!

#writing #my writing #wip: stars

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jenniferfaye34 · 4 years

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#Giveaway + Excerpt ~ Promise For Tomorrow by Michelle DeBruin... #books #Christian #Historical #romance #readers

On Tour with Prism Book Tours

Promise for Tomorrow By Michelle De Bruin Christian Historical Romance Paperback & ebook, 290 Pages November 19th 2019 by Mantle Rock Publishing Living a life of faith isn’t going the way Logan and Karen hoped until some special visitors arrive and offer them their future back. Karen Millerson dreamed of teaching high school but now finds herself boarding with a farm family and teaching country school. She is engaged to marry Logan De Witt and is getting prepared to share in ministry with him. But when she gets blamed for the tragic fire at the school, Karen’s future grows uncertain. Logan De Witt is working to clear his family’s name with the bank. But when he breaks his leg, hindering his ability to work the farm, Logan is faced with life-changing decisions. When his best friend can’t offer the help he requested, can Logan find a way to care for his family and court Karen at the same time before his love for her destroys all of them?

(Affiliate links included.)

Goodreads | Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Book Depository

EXCERPT: A fragment of memory returned. “Karen.” She glanced up with a question in her eyes. “When I woke up a few minutes ago, what did I say to you?” She blushed. “You called me an angel.” “Then I wasn’t seeing things.” His hazy mind was finally catching up to his vision. “I said that because of how you look right now.” Karen gave a self-conscious flutter of her lashes and slipped her fingers through a wave of hair. Logan wrestled with his longing to imitate Karen’s movements. Then he could discover for himself if the strands really were as silky as they looked. “Do you know how beautiful you are?” Karen shook her head. “Then let me tell you.” Karen leaned in as if she hoped he’d whisper the words. The shift in her posture brushed his bare shoulder with a curl of her hair. Logan caught it between his fingers. Smooth. Silky. Satisfying. How he’d managed to share his home with her since last summer and not catch a glimpse of her hair loose and flowing before now stumped him. He should have paid more attention. “You are the most gorgeous young woman I’ve ever met. I’m honored that you have agreed to become my wife. Even without the courtship.” He winked. How nice to have his wits returning. Without them Karen had no reason to release that joyful laugh of hers. Something else he’d miss if she moved to the Bettens’. They shared one more kiss, and then Karen settled in, reading the Bible once again. As Logan listened, he did a little praying. Karen truly was the most beautiful, talented, godly young woman he’d ever known. More than Lorraine or any of those other girls Pete thought might be good for him. The Lord truly knew what he was doing to call Logan to singleness all those years. And now God gave him Karen. All he wanted to do was sweep her onto his lap and make a full-time career out of landing kisses over her face and neck. If Eldon recognized that sort of occupation as generating the profit he needed at the bank, he’d have that debt paid off by tomorrow. But Karen lived in his home. She fussed over his comfort and spent long hours in the middle of the night at his bedside. It made a man want to forget the existence of words like decorum or propriety. In that moment, Logan saw his injuries in a whole new light. The cast, the muddled mind, the ribs in need of recovery were God’s way of helping him preserve honorable living arrangements with his fiancée. As long as his cumbersome leg and dizzy brain kept him confined to the sofa, he was unable to give in to the temptations luring him away from all he held as right and true. Logan ended his prayer thanking the Lord in Heaven above from the bottom of his heart for broken bones. Other Books in the Series Hope for Tomorrow By Michelle De Bruin Christian Historical Romance Paperback & ebook, 294 Pages October 23rd 2018 by Mantle Rock Publishing LLC When Logan De Witt learns of his father’s sudden death, he returns home to the family’s dairy farm. During his stay, he discovers his mother’s struggle with finances and his younger sister’s struggle with grief. Concern for his family presses Logan to make the difficult decision to leave his career as a pastor and stay on the farm. As a way to make some extra money, he agrees to board the teacher for their local school. Karen Millerson arrives from Chicago ready to teach high school but her position is eliminated so she accepts the role of country school teacher. Eager to put her family’s ugly past behind her, Karen begins a new career to replace the trust she lost in her own father who had been in ministry when she was a child. Logan and Karen both sense a call from the Lord to serve him, but neither of them expected that one day they would do it together. Can Karen learn to trust again? Will Logan lay aside his grief in exchange for God’s purpose for his life?

(Affiliate links included.)

Goodreads | Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Book Depository

About the Author

Michelle De Bruin lives in Iowa with her husband and two teenage sons. She has a bachelor’s degree in Religion with a Christian Ministry emphasis, and in Music. Michelle is the spiritual services provider for an organization that offers services for people with mental and physical disabilities. She has been a member of American Christian Fiction Writers (ACFW) since 2015. Michelle writes inspirational historical romance about people who live in rural communities. Characters that bring to life the delights of farm and small-town living, whispers of Dutch heritage, and Christian faith make Michelle’s stories distinct. A romantic at heart, Michelle is always on the lookout for glimpses of God’s love through the window of a good story. Her first book, Hope for Tomorrow, released in 2018. The sequel, Promise for Tomorrow, released November 2019.

Tour Schedule

Tour Giveaway

One winner will receive a signed print copy of Promise for Tomorrow, chocolates, and a winter-themed quilted table runner (US only)

Ends February 26, 2020

ENTER HERE

#Promise for Tomorrow #Michelle DeBruin #Christian romance #Historical #Prism Book Tours #Hearts & Scribbles

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samuelmmarcus · 5 years

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Traditional Home Ideas

Certain places feel like home the moment you look at them and this home is one of them. Designed by Gathered Group (recently featured here), this traditional home needed to feel more welcoming and have plenty of seating because the clients like to entertain often. The designers brought in many timeless pieces and combined them with hints of turquoise, grey, blue and white.

Take a good look at the details of this home and soon you will notice how welcoming every space feels.

I hope this post inspires you…

Traditional Home Ideas

This place feels like a real home. It’s tailored yet warm, and it features an inspiring furniture layout.

Sisal rug is Stark.

Decor

Decor can make or break a room. The lack of it can make any space feel cold and unfinished, but if you use too much of it, the space can become overly done, cluttered and – be aware – tacky. Balance is always key!

Sofa

This gorgeous linen sofa is by Lee Industries (available through the designer – yep, that’s her! :)) – Similar Sofas: here & here.

Sofa Table

Sofa table is by Tritter Feefer (available through the designer). Take notice on how the designer decorated this piece.

Beautiful Sofa Tables: here (similar), here, here & here.

Table Lamps: Robert Abbey – also here & here.

Artwork

This original artwork, done by a local artist, complements the soothing color scheme of this room.

Fireplace

The fireplace features a 3D Arched Basketweave tile and traditional built-ins.

Fireplace Tile Ideas: here, here, here, here & here.

Inspired by this Room:

(Scroll to see more)

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Sconces

Sconces are Robert Abbey Axis.

Leather Chairs

Leather chairs (or faux leather) always add warmth and an inviting feel to any space. These already belonged to the client.

Beautiful Leather Chairs: here, here, here & here.

Pillow: here – similar.

Bookshelves

Adding a wallpaper on the back of a bookcase gives it an instant upgrade!

Footstool

Footstool is Ballard Designs Nala – similar here.

Floor Lamp

What an inspiring color scheme! Floor lamp is by Surya.

Coffee Table

The coffee table is Made Goods Cara Oval Coffee Table.

Other Beautiful Coffee Tables: here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Layered Rugs

The patterned rug is by Surya.

Teak

This sculptural Teak side table brings character to this living room. Similar: here.

Beautiful Side Tables: here, here, here & here.

Dining Room

Featuring board and batten wainscoting and grasscloth wallpaper, this dining room feels elegant and stylish. Buffet is Phillips Scott Newport.

Rug: Uttermost.

Mirror

Dining room mirror is Modern History Diana.

Beautiful Mirrors: here, here, here, here & here.

Tray: here.

Emerald

Vase: Van Cleve Collection – Other Vases: here, here, here, here & here.

Breakfast Room

What a dreamy breakfast nook! This custom banquette features sloped arms and beadboard paneling.

Stools

Stools are Gabby Vivian stool.

Other Great Counterstools: here, here, here, here, here & here.

Pillows

Pillows on banquette: All custom, available through the designer: Kravet Pattern Waterpolo, Color 21 – Cloud, Kravet Pattern Upstream, Color 1511 Mist, Kravet Frame In 516 River.

Banquette Fabric: Pattern 33406 – Stanford, 1116 – Oyster.

Designer Fabric Pillows: here, here, here & here. Other Pillows: here, here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Chandelier

A French-inspired chandelier brings a romantic feel to this breakfast room.

Chandelier: Wayfair.

Blue & White

Dinnerware: Abigails Splash Collection & Mugs.

Paint Color

The paint colors are custom, but similar to “Benjamin Moore Classic Gray” on walls and “Benjamin Moore White Dove” on millwork.

Dining Table

Dining table was custom made for the space – similar here & here.

Many thanks to the interior designer for sharing the details above!

Interior Design: Gathered Group (Instagram – Facebook)

Photographer: Millie Holloman Photography – @milliehphoto.

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Best Sales of the Month:

Thank you for shopping through Home Bunch. I would be happy to assist you if you have any questions or are looking for something in particular. Feel free to contact me and always make sure to check dimensions before ordering. Happy shopping!

Serena & Lily: Amazing Rug Sale!

Wayfair: Up to 70% OFF on Furniture and Decor!!!

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Posts of the Week:

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Modern Farmhouse.

2019 New Year Home Tour.

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Charlotte, NC.

New-Construction Home Ideas.

Home-Sweet-Home Interior Design Ideas.

Beach House Tour.

Florida Beach Cottage.

Transitional Lake House Interior Design Ideas.

Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen’s Home – Full House Tour.

Dark Cedar Shaker Exterior.

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Coastal Farmhouse Design.

Neutral Home.

Southern-inspired Modern Farmhouse.

Coastal Farmhouse Home Decor.

Small Lot Modern Farmhouse.

Reinvented Classic Kitchen Design.

Florida Beach House Interior Design.

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Urban Farmhouse.

Tailored Interiors.

Classic Colonial Home Design.

Follow me on Instagram: @HomeBunch

You can follow my pins here: Pinterest/HomeBunch

See more Inspiring Interior Design Ideas in my Archives.

“Dear God,

If I am wrong, right me. If I am lost, guide me. If I start to give-up, keep me going.

Lead me in Light and Love”.

Have a wonderful day, my friends and we’ll talk again tomorrow.”

with Love,

Luciane from HomeBunch.com

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unit8amg · 5 years

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Final Evaluation

Context

This project was just a big experiment on my end just to know what I'm actually capable of doing and it turned out to be my best “still” piece by far. The purpose of my work in the creative industry was firstly just to be used in a cinematic trailer for a game but now that I've expanded the model and made it possible for anyone to download, it can truly be used for anything in the world. The model, however, is quite big; if you're counting it by polygons, mainly because of the hair as each of the strands, are a 3d object in the triangular pattern with means it has 3 sides for each strand which is made up of 4 sided polygons, so, for example, just the front portion of the hair, it has 10000 strands and 15 segments, 3x15=45x10,000=450,000x15=6,750,000 polygons, and that's just one section of the hair. What I'm trying to say is that it's extremely tasking on the computer to simulate all of them one by one that's why I disabled it for the project, if they want, they can always enable it.

At first, I didn't know how to do most of this stuff but with enough time and experimenting, I was able to create this peace. for example, it was my first time; doing sculpting, using hair, creating garments (marvelous designer), and using substance painter for more than just applying a bunch of materials and calling it a day. Now that I know all these things, I feel like I can make a piece that is 10x better and that is what I will try and work on in summer. So when I do, I will focus on improving the eyes especially as I feel like that is what was lacking in this project. The eyes did not look as real as I hoped and the look of the makeup was also quite mediocre and I should have researched the look of it a bit more. The next piece I'm thinking of only creating the bust to create a headshot of the subject. it will follow up with the same theme which was cyberpunk/sci-fi, however, this time go into much more detail.

Research

I think I've done lots of research and from that was able to create this piece. I had lots of varying sources of research (which are in my bibliography) ranging from the look of the skin, clothes, weapons, lighting, style, etc.

I'm gonna be honest, I could've done a lot more sketched but I already had the whole idea planned out in my head and just wanted to get to work as it would have taken some time to draw literally everything I was thinking of for this project (which was a lot). the ones I do actually have aren't really too much of use other than the arm anatomy experiments and the swords. I did add them in my final project it's just that I didn't create a mock object for each of those drawings as it would've taken way too much time.

Currently, for my research I use; Twitter, Behance, Artstation, and Pinterest as I think it has the most varying sources on the web. I don't think I would change the way I research as it worked completely fine on this project, however, I would maybe look into more websites that are like that or something along those lines. Having multiple websites for research is a huge bonus as it allows you to get things that the other websites don't have, as Artstation and Behance are art oriented. while Pinterest is just a plethora of a little bit of everything.

Problem-solving

I had a handful of problems while creating my project. my first problem was that I didn't like how my 3 weeks of work went, this resulted in me scrapping everything and starting again. I had another hiccup when my hair decided to bug out and completely break resulting in me having to completely redo it. I'm not angry about it as the new hair came out better than the previous pair I had. Then I had many less crucial bugs that I had to tackle like the UV mapping for the clothes was not working as it made all of it transparent which I had to fix by manually selecting areas I wanted to be that transparent pattern. This was an important addition as I didn't want the clothing to be completely bland. I wanted it to have some real-world characteristics which I was able to achieve by adding branding, the branding I used was Nike. I've had another problem with the skin of my character. at first, it looked oily and unnatural. I fixed it by altering the roughness and specular maps to be a bit more contrast between the blacks and whites. this helped it to bring out a little more detail in the groves for the skin and the bumps used on top. I think the lighting had a play in it as well, so I changed my environments HDRI and created some light sources to give highlights on more important areas like the side of the cheek, the eyes, and the rim light for more highlights on the hair and show off the translucency I created for it and the skin, you can see this because the tips of the hair are white and the ear is red due to the Subsurface scattering.

I think I learned many things due to these problems and how I can now deal with them, I now know how to deal with skin, hair and clothing if they break. This ensures me to have fewer errors and a more straight forward workflow. To fix these I will now know that I cant add extra geometry to the object with area selection as that breaks the math, ill know that the skin needs more contrasting textures and that I need to incorporate my alphas (transparency) within them.

Planning and production

I think my planning was decent, I had a mood board for each subject if it was, for example, the sword, character look or, an overall style of the composition. It was enough to get the whole idea of the model I was making which in the end looked like I wanted. to be honest, looking at it now I would've changed some bits like the eye makeup and some adjustments to the eyebrows as they currently look like they're a bit too low to be realistic, it was a bit of a pain to work on it as the scene was quite laggy and my selection brush was not properly selecting object faces.

I would do a lot of things differently in my future projects like having a more efficient workflow for the hair, this would mean using the symmetry tool on it so it would be easier to control and manipulate because then you only need to focus on one side of the head and perfect that as it will then result on the other side too. I would also try and work on the clothing a bit more as I've only got the basics down right at this moment. considering ill be doing the same style for my next project I will try a bit harder to create a more cyberpunk feel as this one right now only gives off a small amount of that. In that case, I will try and go a bit more overboard with all the tech and create something more interesting.

Practical skills

I have learned “soooo” many new things during this project if it was, for example, marvelous designer or substance painter. It was something completely different than to what I was accustomed to, I'm used to creating visual moving environments but I decided to change some things up and create a modelled character. because of this, I'm now more comfortable using the new tools in my disposal for any other project I create, and you can trust me, I will.

A lot of things went into this project, things that took me years to learn, and things that took me weeks, I other words, I've still got far to go into perfecting all these new tools. That's why I'm doing a new project in a week or two. I want to also learn more advanced and hard surface modelling for more tech-oriented things like futuristic goggles or what not.

Evaluation

I evaluated my work as much as I could while also including as much detail as I could. I don't want to talk about something that wasn't relevant to the post so I included only the important parts. I could add more text but I feel like it’s unnecessary.

I try and describe the things I'm talking about so people would have at least some understanding of what my process was. for example, the process of the software I was using or the way I did something to achieve my outcome.

Presentation

My blog is decently structured but even if it wasn't there would be any way to change it so I would have to delete my posts and add them again which is quite annoying. That's why I want to and will present my work on Behance as I have a lot more freedom to personalise the look and feel of the project.

I'm going to continue using Behance for my final pieces and I guess I'm going to work on when and how I post my posts because as of now some of them don't really line up in my timeline as I had posts waiting to be done as drafts which then result in me not being able to post them in time as I have other things I have to post as well.

0 notes

raganandhersurveys · 5 years

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2/20/19~LXVII

1. How would you describe your relationship with your hair over the years?

•at the moment i’m really happy with it. i’m trying to grow it out so it’s really long for the summer. I cut it a long time ago and regretted it so i’ll probably keep it long for a while anyway

2. How do you practice truly living in the moment?

•if i’m being honest, I don’t do very well at it. I’m always thinking about my future. but I think one way is to stay off my phone. I find that that really makes me focus in

3. Do you think most abusers know they’re being abusive?

•I think it depends on the person. honestly abuse is abuse. no matter your mental state. technically people who may have some mental issues may not know they are being abusive. but i’d say most do. it’s about power and control and maybe they were somehow abused in the past. but again that should not be an excuse

4. How do you feel about your SO daily/regularly checking up on a couple of his exes on social media?

•well i’m guilty, i’ll look up my ex bf every once in a while. as far as my man looking up his exes, I don’t really care. he’s had some toxic relationships so I doubt he checks up on them

5. What perfume does your SO love on you?

•he doesn’t really have a preference but he seems to notice when I wear anything vanilla. like Pink’s ‘warm and cozy’

6. Have you made any(at least semi-) permanent alterations to your appearance? If so, how did you find the experience and do you regret it?

•I don’t have any

7. What are some ways you make yourself feel good before you start your day?

•listening to music, eating a breakfast that I actually like, knowing that I have everything I need done

8. Women with disabilities/ anxiety/ depression/other mental illnesses, how do you get it across to your SO/friends that sometimes you just can’t do something?

•this really doesn’t apply to me

9. Do you prefer your guy to wear cologne or not?

•I mean I guess I do prefer cologne. but his natural smell(when it isn’t after a basketball game and smells bad ;) is pretty nice

10. Ladies, how important is it to you that your SO wears/would wear a wedding ring?

•umm definitely should lol. if you’re committed to someone, the least you could do is wear your wedding band

11. What was the turning point that led you to decide for or against having children?

•well at 16 im not planning on starting a family anytime soon. but i’ve always loved kids. I guess that first started with my mom because she’s a 1st grade teacher and loves kids. and the thought of watching my children grow and learn and mature is just like a dream.

12. How do you feel about men who preface statements on non-gendered things with “as a guy”?

•lol I don’t care

13. Does anyone else just HAVE to wear pajamas/lounge clothes when you’re at home?

•for sure!!

14. Ladies, what’s the silliest thing you do with your SO?

•dance and jam to music honestly

15. Is having your “dream” wedding really that important to have?

•yes!!! for me at least lol:) i have a pinterest board and everything!

16. What would your reaction be if your SO wanted the opposite type of wedding than you did?

•we’d compromise of course. but honestly a lot of the wedding is the bride’s decision because her family ultimately pays for for it lmao

17. What kind of body type do you find attractive and unattractive? (for your preferred sex)?

•I like tall muscular guys who are athletic but i’m pretty open to anything;i’m not gonna lie and say I don’t love abs;) i’m not into skinny guys tbh. and since i’m 5’1 I don’t really have to worry about height because most people are at least an inch taller than me

18. How do you feel about strangers approaching you with compliments?

•I love that! it’s so sweet and thoughtful. our society deems everything awkaward. like bitch it takes a lot to make me feel uncomfortable

19. Do you consider it cheating if your SO goes to a strip club and then doesn’t tell you?

•I mean I wouldn’t consider it cheating but i’d be extremely upset

20. Would you be more offended if your man cheated on you with a guy or a girl?

•I mean cheating period is wrong. but considering i’m straight and go for straight guys, it would be worse if it was a guy ig

#survey #67

0 notes

dawnjeman · 5 years

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Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Canada

I am truly honored to be featuring Kaitlyn Harris from decorating__life on our “Beautiful Homes of Instagram” series. Kaitlyn lives in Calgary, Canada and you might even remember seeing this stunning home on the blog before. Keep reading and you’ll understand better as this homeowner explains below…

Hi everyone, my name is Kaitlyn Harris and I’m an interior designer based in Calgary, Canada (@decorating__life). Thank you so much for the opportunity to share my home on this amazing blog; I’m honored and excited to be part of such an amazing resource for the design community.

First let me start by saying I’m very grateful and fortunate to own a home that is well known among the design community – in fact, it’s even been featured as a previous Design Inspiration here on Home Bunch! The home was originally designed and built by a local builder called Veranda Estate Homes, and they lived in it from 2011 to 2017. I feel strongly that when a builder designs and constructs their own personal home, it’s probably done to the highest standards possible; this house was no exception. The attention to detail in the home was above anything we had seen in our search, and we instantly fell in love with it.

My husband, Steve, and I built our previous house from the ground up before our two sweet kids – Winnie (age 4) and Cash (age 2) – came along; so we began our home search by looking for empty land where we could build a customized acreage property better suited to our current life. However, after seeing limited options and facing challenging conditions during our search (hiking through feet of snow!) we decided to look at existing properties. We came across our would-be home: a stunning two acre property with over 7,000 square feet of developed space. The home features six bedrooms, five bathrooms, a 1,400 square foot garage, gym, 650 plus bottle wine bar and plenty of marble – just how I like it!

On our first tour of the home, we knew the layout and design was perfect for us, however, we could see some opportunities to improve on existing spaces and tailor them to our needs. Steve works in ecommerce, developing and growing online businesses. I do contract interior design work, when I’m not busy being a mom. We needed a house that was very specific to our lifestyle – lots of space was a must since the entire family is home every day. It was also important we had functional workspaces, in addition to extra usable rooms we could sneak away to for a moment of peace.

We purchased the home in the dead of winter, and moved in the following summer in 2017. The last year has been a fun process making the home our own and reimagining various spaces to fit our unique lifestyle. I had seen this home before on social media, and never dreamed it would become my own. My husband and I worked very hard to achieve this goal, and often the realization that this is our home still hits me – I love it so much!

In the photos below I’ll recap some of the spaces original to the home (with my decorating touch applied!), then explore some of the bigger changes we’ve made since moving in. Enjoy, and thank you once again for allowing us to show you our home – we’re truly honored!

Photography by Phil Crozier.

(Note: I am reposting this today because I am not feeling 100%, but I will be back soon with a new post! Thank you, my friends!

)

Beautiful Homes of Instagram: Canada

From the moment we drove up the long driveway, we were in love! This home has a very grand, but inviting curb appeal with large double iron front doors and a front veranda.

Front Door

The driveway continues past the front door to a large parking pad (we keep trying to think of a fancier name for it!) and the four car garage. Step inside…

Exterior Sconces: Visual Comfort.

Foyer

Upon entry our guests eyes are guided up the stairs to a large light fixture and walk way to the master bedroom.

Staircase

This grand foyer and spiral staircase is well-loved on social media.

Similar Tables: here & here.

Welcome!

We appreciate that visitors at the front door can’t see into common areas, which is great for privacy and leaves something to the imagination.

Entry Bench: Wayfair.

Rug: Safavieh 4×6

Paint Color

Paint color is Benjamin Moore Seapearl.

Dining Room

This room underwent a major overhaul immediately after moving in. The original dining room felt dark and heavy with tons of wood, and we prefer a brighter / lighter style. With a few coats of paint (including the ceiling) and the addition of a beautiful marble top dining table, the room now feels inviting and elegant. The marble top table is a great tie-in to the kitchen and butler’s pantry.

Dining Table

Our dining chairs are classic oval backs, with a durable fabric that will withstand family dinners for years to come. We’re still searching for the perfect fabric for drapery in this room.

Paint color is Sherwin Williams SW 6245 Quicksilver.

Dining Table: RH. Other Beautiful Dining Tables: here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Dining Chairs: RH – similar here & here (set of 2).

Chandelier: Arteriors.

Mirrors: Urban Barn – similar here & here.

Built-in Hutch: Designed by the builder.

Butler’s Pantry

The butler’s pantry is located between the dining room and kitchen, and includes a sink, glass / bottle storage and an icemaker.

We leave our most commonly used house liquor here and it’s the ideal spot to make a quick drink for guests.

Hardware & Lighting

Stone is solid Statuario slab marble countertop and backsplash.

Lighting: Visual Comfort.

Hardware: Here.

Kitchen

We’ve made no major changes to this kitchen since purchasing the home – how could you! It’s absolutely gorgeous with a full marble countertops and backsplash.

Long before we moved in I searched for the perfect bar stools for the island. I eventually found them on Wayfair, and although they took 10 months to arrive, they were worth the wait!

Kitchen Hood

The custom hood acts as a focal point for the entire room.

Pot Filler: Perrin & Rowe.

The kitchen was designed by Veranda Estate Homes.

Kitchen Lighting

Island Pendants: Visual Comfort.

Sconces above Windows: Visual Comfort.

Kitchen Paint Color

Kitchen Cabinet paint Color: Benjamin Moore Seapearl.

Toaster: Smeg 4 Slice Toaster, Pastel Blue.

Kitchen Hardware: Hickory Hardware.

Meet the Homeowners!

This is the very talented Kaitlyn and her sweet husband, Steve.

Mugs: Crate & Barrel.

Sink & Faucet

Kitchen Bridge Faucet: Perrin & Rowe.

Sink: Kohler.

Island Countertop

The island has a butcher block top, which is more durable than the marble and easily refinished.

Coffee Maker: Nespresso Vertuo.

Candlesticks on Island: Twig & Anchor – similar here, here & here.

Kitchen Desk

You will find the fridge and a custom kitchen desk on the left side of the kitchen.

Kitchen Desk

The kitchen desk features butler’s block countertop and seeded cabinet glass doors.

Chair: RH – similar: here.

Phone: Pottery Barn.

Breakfast Room

This is one of my favorites breakfast rooms ever shared on Home Bunch. Isn’t it gorgeous?!

Dining Chairs: Ikea – similar here, here & here.

I’m Hungry

Kaitlyn’s puppy could be on a cover of any magazine! He’s just sooooo adorable!

Chandelier

Chandelier is Visual Comfort SC5005PN.

Clock: McLaughlin and Scott (discontinued) – similar here & here.

Dining Table

Dining Table: Houzz – similar here & here.

Blue Vase: Wayfair.

Great Room

This room is probably the most shared and pinned photo of this home – it was on my Pinterest board years before we owned the property. The great room features beautiful wood beams, a large stone fireplace and mantle, and our favorite feature: an oversized window bench.

Window-seat

The bench is one of our most common family hang out spots, and has large drawers underneath for toy storage.

Fireplace

The TV in this space is rarely used, so we often cover it up by leaning art on the mantle. It helps emphasize the high ceiling height in this room and nicely balances this grand fireplace.

Rug: Rugs.ca Copenhagen Rug – similar here & here.

Details

Hardwood flooring is Rustic Hickory planks finished on site. The beams are alder and the stone veneer used on fireplace is similar to Montana Quartz – similar here.

Round Accent Table: Joss & Main.

Chairs

Chairs are from Wayfair.

Coffee Table

Coffee Table: RH – similar here & here.

Coffee Table Decor

Beads: Sugarboo – similar here.

Similar Natural Stone Decor: here & here.

Paint Color

Wall paint color is Benjamin Moore Seapearl.

Sideboard: Local – similar here, here, here, here & here.

Mirror

Mirror: Local store – similar here.

Sofa

Sofa is by Bernhardt (super comfortable and great quality!)

Pillows: Etsy.

Inspired by this Look:

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Hallway

This hallway lets tons of light in, and connects the home from garage to great room. I found the perfect small console to fit this space for ditching keys and sunglasses when you get home.

Console: Local – similar here, here & here.

Similar Wire Brass Basket: Wayfair.

Women’s Boots: Hunter.

Children’s Boots: Joe Fresh.

Pantry

This pantry got so many pins last time I shared it on the blog! It has a fantastic layout and I love the fact that it was a microwave.

Stand Mixer: KitchenAid in Aqua Sky.

Wood Crate: Wayfair.

Powder Room

The powder room features a classic marble washstand with metal base and wall paneling.

Washstand: RH – similar here.

Similar Mirror: here.

Mudroom

We’ve left the original mudroom intact with no major changes. We followed the advice of our realtor, who told us to always put your kids cubbies furthest from the door – there’s nothing worse than a toddler sitting on the floor to take off their shoes while you have your arms full of groceries!

Pendants: Visual Comfort.

Wallpaper: Anthropologie.

Cow Head Bust: Sagebrooke Home.

Similar Baskets: Here.

Playroom

Our previous home had an upstairs bonus room where the kids watched TV and played with toys. This home doesn’t have one in the layout, so we reimagined an upstairs bedroom and converted it into a playroom. We added wall decals, custom art and installed a TV. The bedroom has a large closet, which is perfect for toys, and an attached bathroom. It’s become a favorite hangout space before bed, and the best part about it, you can close the door and hide the mess!

Side Tables: Wayfair.

Decal

Decall: Urbanwalls.

Wall Art: Peekaboo Woodland Animals.

Sofa & Rug

Blue Chesterfield Sofa: Local store – similar here.

Ottoman: Revolve – similar here, here & here.

Rug: Rugs.ca 8×8 Casablanca Round Rug – Other fun rugs: here

Reading Nook

Similar Draperies: Here & Here.

Previous Home

Cashton’s bedroom in our old house was one of my most popular social posts, and it’s widely shared on Pinterest / Instagram – you’ll see most of the same furniture. The custom made “pipe” shelf was sourced from a local handyman who builds these using unused materials from job sites.

Son’s Bedroom

Cashton’s bedroom had a large hand-painted mural in it that didn’t fit our design plan for the room. Due to the thickness of the paint and the ridges it created, we had to have the wall skim coated and repaired to achieve a flat paintable surface. The whole room was repainted in a steely blue.

Crib: West Coastal Kids – similar here & here.

Dresser: RH – similar here & here.

Similar Side Table: here.

Similar Pipe Shelves: here & here.

Similar Pouf: here.

Rug

Plaid rug is from a local store – similar here.

Paint Color

Paint Color: Valspar CI188 Stormy Cove.

Propeller: Wayfair.

Jack & Jill Bathroom

The kid’s bedrooms are connected with a Jack and Jill bathroom, which helps streamline bedtime for mom and dad. There is a water closet and tub opposite the sink, which are not pictured.

Faucet: Kohler.

Similar Lighting: Here.

Similar Hardware: Here.

Wallpaper

Wallpaper is from Anthropologie.

Bathroom Floor Tile: 2” white hex tile with a black pencil and white ceramic boarder.

Daughter’s Bedroom

The original owner of this home had two boys, so this bedroom required a major overhaul. Like most little girls, my daughter loves pink and princesses, and the existing wallpaper, paint and window coverings we’re not going to work for her.

Immediately upon move-in we stripped the wallpaper and repainted the whole room a soft pink color. Custom drapery was added above the window bench – which we repurposed from our last home – I made all of the paper flowers on the wall by hand, and we stapled those to the wall around her canopy.

Bed: Ikea.

Dresser

The dresser is originally from IKEA, and we added the custom gold molding details (from “Overlays”) to ensure it was cohesive with the room.

Similar Mirror: Here.

Paint Color

Paint Color: Behr RD-W3 My Sweetheart.

Master Bedroom

One of our first priorities in this home was to brighten up the master bedroom with new paint. We also plan to add some architectural details to the walls / ceiling in the future (such as paneling or beams). The window looks out to a pond frequented by moose and deer.

King-sized Bed: Local store – similar here, here, here & here.

Nightstands: House of Hampton.

Bedding: Pottery Barn.

Floor Mirror: Orren Ellis.

Paint Color

Paint Color: Sherwin Williams – SW 7070 Site White.

Chandelier is by Visual Comfort.

Chair: Wayfair.

Similar Bench: here.

Nightstand Decor

Ring Table Lamp: Local store – similar here, here, here & here.

Similar Candle Holder: here & here.

Her Office

My previous homes never had an office I could devote to my design work, and finally I have this perfect spot to edit my photos and sketch new ideas. The built-in desk is located off the master bedroom, and looks out to the front of the property. I love working here in the morning and enjoying a coffee while my daughter lays in my bed watching TV.

Chandelier is by Visual Comfort.

Paint Color

Paint color is Site White by Sherwin Williams.

Deconstructed Tufted Wingback Chair: Carpenter James – similar here, here, here & here.

Sconces

Cabinet is painted in Benjamin Moore Oc-19 Seapearl.

Sconces: Visual Comfort.

Beautiful Pin Boards: Here.

Dressing Room

Steve and I have separate his and hers closets, which means I can keep my closet perfectly organized and feminine (there’s a reason his isn’t pictured!) The closet has lots of built-in shelving and a full dresser with jewelry drawers. The oval shaped window lets in plenty natural light, which helps this space feel clean and airy.

Master Bathroom

Women swoon over this master bathroom! A luxurious, marble-clad space featuring dual vanities, a soaker tub, makeup desk and family shower.

We purchased the large freestanding mirror from the original owners – source here.

Beautiful Floor Mirrors: here, here & here.

Tub Accent Table: Aidan Gray.

Vanity

Bathroom cabinetry is painted in Benjamin Moore Seapearl.

Chair: Wayfair.

Vanity Mirror: Here.

Sconces: Visual Comfort.

Shower

The multiple shower heads and body-sprays are ideal for cleaning up the kids after a messy meal – they also love creating potions in here!

Flooring

The bathroom featuring hardwood flooring in a herringbone pattern.

Sconces: Visual Comfort.

His Office

Function was key in my husband’s office. In order to effectively work from home, he needs a space away from the “action” of the kitchen / family room, lots of natural light and plenty of storage. This office is located right off the front entrance, with a perfect view of the driveway and gate. It has built in cabinets and we converted one side into a foam-lined recording booth that he uses for webinars and training videos; the desk was purchased from the original sellers. I made him hide three additional computer monitors for the sake of this photo shoot!

Desk Chair: Hooker Furniture.

Similar Desk: Here.

Paint Color

Paint color is Benjamin Moore HC168 Chelsea Gray.

Console Table: Wayfair.

Similar Trunks: Here & Here.

Wall Art: Local – similar: Here.

Basement Rec Room

After a new coat of paint to brighten up the whole space, we added a large comfortable sectional and plush rug. It quickly became our preferred TV hangout and entertaining space. New window coverings were added for privacy, including custom drapery to cover the double doors.

Similar Brass Bowl: CB2

Coffee Table

Coffee Table: Here.

Similar Pillows: West Elm.

Basement Paint Color

Paint Color: Cloverdale CA187 Platinum

Sectional Sofa: Local store – Other Great Sectional Sofas: here, here, here, here, here, here & here.

Pool Table Lighting

Just behind this seating area is a pool table, dart board and cabinet full of board games.

Pool Table Lighting: Visual Comfort.

Bar

We have visions of converting this space to a pub feel, so there’s still some work to be done.

Barstools: RH – similar here & here (counterstools)

Cork Vase: Wayfair.

Entertainer’s Dream

My husband has a large scotch collection as well, which we keep outside the wine room in a back-lit mirrored shelving area. The bar is outstanding for entertaining and storage, with a built in TV and our own house cocktail menu for guests to choose from.

Cabinetry is Alder.

Brass Hardware: Pulls & Knobs.

Wine Room

This amazing 650+ bottle wine room and bar is definitely a focal point in the basement. While not big wine collectors originally, our passion for it has grown and the wine room is now well stocked.

Flooring

Floor is heated concrete.

Gym

We always loved the idea of having a dedicated gym in our house, however our homes in the city never had the space. This gym helps us avoid driving on treacherous winter roads, and it’s a good escape when you need to blow off some steam. The mounted TV is great for watching spin classes or YouTube workout videos – it’s like having a built-in trainer.

Guest Bedroom

We love to entertain, and after a night of games and wine we see lots of overnight guests. This room was completely overhauled with new paint, a large TV and comfortable amenities for guests. We keep the drawers stocked with overnight supplies so an advanced reservation is never required.

Bed: Here & Here.

Lamps: Wayfair.

Nightstands: Here (currently available only in white and grey).

Laundry Room

Paint Color: Benjamin Moore OC-23 Classic Gray.

Lighting: Visual Comfort.

Hardware: Pulls & Knobs.

Back Porch

The deck is a previously unseen highlight of this home.

Fireplace Arm Chairs: Here.

Unwind

With such a short summer, we spend most warm nights outside enjoying the peace and quiet; the outdoor fireplace sees plenty of action, and the kids enjoy watching a show while mom and dad relax.

Decor

I designed and drafted our outdoor dining table, which was then custom built by my father-in-law – it has a composite decking top, which is incredibly durable for our harsh winters. There is also a large seating area opposite the dining area which is not pictured.

Similar Outdoor Dining Table: Here.

Dining Chairs: Wayfair.

String Patio Lights: Here.

Lanterns: Wayfair.

Many thanks to Kaitlyn Harris for sharing all of the details above. Make sure to follow @decorating__life on Instagram and visit her website for more inspiration!

Photography by Phil Crozier.

Builder & Designer: Veranda Estate Homes.

You can see more specs on this home here.

Bring the Holidays Home!

Online Holiday Shopping = More Options & Less Crowds!

Exciting Holiday Sales!

Wayfair: 72 Hour Blowout!!! Huge Sales on Decor, Furniture & Rugs!!!

Serena & Lily: A winter beach celebration: Up to 30% off!

Joss & Main: Best Prices of 2018 – Up to 70% Off

Pottery Barn: 20% Off plus Free Shipping with Code: CHEER!!!

One Kings Lane: 40% Off Holiday Decor.

West Elm: 20% Off plus Free Shipping with Code: TREAT

Build: Up to 80% OFF on Kitchen, Bathroom, Hardware & Lighting!

Neiman Marcus: Up to 50% Off on regular prices!

Pier 1: Huge Christmas Decor Sales + Free Shipping – Use Code: FREESHIP49

Anthropologie: Extra 40% Off on Sale Items!

Posts of the Week:

Interior Design Ideas.

Interior Design Ideas: Colorful Interiors.

Traditional Farmhouse-style Home.

Small Lot Modern Farmhouse.

Family-friendly Home Design.

New England Home.

Transitional Home Design.

Bedroom and Bathroom Reno.

Texas Gulf Coast Beach House.

Neutral Home Interior Ideas.

Grey Kitchen Paint Colors.

You can follow my pins here: Pinterest/HomeBunch

See more Inspiring Interior Design Ideas in my Archives.

“Dear God,

If I am wrong, right me. If I am lost, guide me. If I start to give-up, keep me going.

Lead me in Light and Love”.

Have a wonderful day, my friends and we’ll talk again tomorrow.”

with Love,

Luciane from HomeBunch.com

Come Follow me on

Get Home Bunch Posts Via Email

Contact Luciane

from Home http://www.homebunch.com/beautiful-homes-of-instagram-canada/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

0 notes

fashiontrendin-blog · 6 years

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This tattoo artist reveals exactly why your tattoo doesn't need to have meaning

http://fashion-trendin.com/this-tattoo-artist-reveals-exactly-why-your-tattoo-doesnt-need-to-have-meaning/

This tattoo artist reveals exactly why your tattoo doesn't need to have meaning

Whenever people see my tattoos, they immediately ask what they mean. For the designs on my body that serve no specific purpose or have no other “meaning” besides I think that they look cool (like the skeleton on my ankle), I feel pressure to attach something sentimental to them. But it’s not necessary for tattoos to have a specific interpretation or symbolism in order to be significant to you. And even if it is insignificant to you, all that matters is that you chose to get it because you liked it and wanted it on your body.

After spending time with tattooer Mars Hobrecker in his studio nestled in the back of The Living Gallery, an event space and art gallery in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I now feel more open to getting a tattoo that I didn’t spend months or years planning out, like the deer on the back of my arm that pays homage to a trip I took to Japan with my dad or the hand holding flowers on my inner arm that is a tribute to the women in my family.

Most of Hobrecker’s appointments are based on predrawn designs, which are known as “flash” in the tattoo community. His clients pick from the latest designs he’s drawn that are taped onto the pages of a photography magazine. Flipping through it, I noticed drawings of objects including everyday objects, like chairs and toothbrushes, and medical equipment, like a speculum, as well as people, both clothed and naked. At first, I was closed off to most of them, mostly because I was trying to connect something sentimental to each of them. The lady sitting in the chair didn’t have a vague resemblance to my grandma and the man hoisting a woman in the air didn’t resemble my ideal relationship.

Brooklyn Beckham is being shamed for his tattoos and we’re not here for it

Hobrecker was incredibly patient as I looked through the magazine-turned-flash-book dozens of time trying to pick something for him to ink onto my skin. He tells me what freaks him out the most is when people open the book and almost immediately point to a design they’d like. “I just feel like I could never be that decisive,” Hoebrecker tells me as I spot a Cruella de Vil-like a woman walking a gaggle of Dalmatians, a package of birth control pills, and a circus-performing couple. I find myself gravitating toward the nude sketches of people covered in colorful flowers, or “garden people,” as Hobrecker calls them.

Each design in the flash book demonstrates a striking between Hobrecker’s style and the many delicate flowers and tiny tattoos that flood Instagram feeds, and unlike the slim pin-up girls of traditional tattoo designs, Hobrecker has a refreshing take on representation in his work.

“People have lots of different types of bodies, so I should be drawing lots of different types of bodies,” he states matter-of-factly. “There’s such a huge range of bodies that come through the door to get tattooed, so I feel like my work should reflect that. I don’t want somebody to flip through and think none of these people look like me.”

Like me, most of Hobrecker’s clients take their time selecting what designs they want permanently etched into their bodies. They’ll flag a couple pages and discuss their top three picks with the tattooer, and some even settle on one completely at random. “I feel like that’s actually a great method because even if you pick the one you like less, you immediately know you like the other one more,” he says. “If you have that sink in your stomach, like, ‘Oh I was hoping for the other one,’ then you know that’s the real choice.”

I find way more meaning in taking a moment to sit with my body and think about my relationship with it.

If you ask Hobrecker, determining whether or not the image “means” something to you should be secondary. Instead, he believes a tattoo’s significance could be found in the tattooing process itself. “I find way more meaning in taking a moment to sit with my body, think about my relationship with it, and have that hour or two where you’re really forced to think about yourself and have this very physical sensation associated with that,” he explains. “For me, that holds way more meaning than a rose that you get for your mom.”

Becoming a tattooer

Although Hobrecker set up shop in The Living Gallery in December 2016, he’s unsure of when he officially became a tattooer, mostly because it wasn’t a career goal of his. (Note: Hobrecker never refers to himself as a “tattoo artist,” which stems from feeling like tattooing isn’t an art practice.)

About three years ago, 25-year-old Hobrecker graduated from school for photography but realized he didn’t want to take photos anymore. Selling his camera equipment and buying a tattoo machine became his next option. At the age of 16, giving “horrible” stick and pokes with sewing needles to his friends and friends of friends became one of his regular extracurricular activities. From this, tattooing became less about the art of it to him, but more about helping people assert control over their bodies. As a trans man, this discovery was crucial to Hobrecker.

“When I was younger, I was always very involved in queer and trans communities,” he says. “The people I was surrounding myself with, myself included, didn’t feel super at home in our bodies.”

My first tattoo was a very permanent reminder of the ownership I had over my own body.

“I can’t speak my mind because I’m a black transgender woman,” says Munroe Bergdorf in her most candid interview ever

In Hobrecker’s case, he didn’t feel like he had control over his body when he was younger either, having attended an all-girls Catholic school where he was required to wear a uniform and barred from dyeing his hair. In this controlled environment, all Hobrecker could do was get a tattoo in secret when he was 18. “That was something that couldn’t be taken away from me,” he says. “That was a very permanent reminder for me of the ownership I had over my own body.”

With his background in stick and pokes, Hobrecker figured a machine would be a faster way to tattoo. Once he had one, he taught himself how to tattoo via the Internet, learning about different machines and needles. Typically, this kind of information is accessed through traditional apprenticeships in tattoo shops. Hobrecker mostly circumvented this by tapping Instagram’s “weird” tattoo community, which he declares is “entirely noncompetitive.” In fact, most of Hobrecker’s tattoos, which add up to about 50, are trades from other tattooers.

Hobrecker explains that, oftentimes, tattoo artists share information with each other, too. “It feels really supportive, and I think that’s because a lot us did come into tattooing through nontraditional means,” he explains. “Tattooing has had a lot of gatekeeping in the ways that people are allowed to learn and access to information, but now there’s a wonderful community of people who snuck in through the back door and are really supportive of one another because we all kind of went about it the same way.”

The tattoo community feels really supportive, and I think that’s because a lot of us came into it through nontraditional means.

These delicate finger tattoo designs are perfect for first-timers

Because he doesn’t consider himself an illustrator and doesn’t draw unless it’s for a tattoo design, Hobrecker’s distinct style developed as he learned to tattoo, too. He read that you needed separate needles for lines and shading, and this influx of information was so confusing to him that he decided to skip shading altogether and focus on lines. “That’s why I draw like this,” he says. “It was really an entirely practical decision.”

Sourcing his designs

Somewhere on Pinterest, Hobrecker keeps a board filled with more 200 photos he plans to use as references for drawings. As the earlier mentions of medical paraphernalia might suggest, he gravitates towards medical imagery. “Even the [designs] that don’t look like they were from old medical texts are,” he says. This comes as a surprise when he later tells me he’s had a largely negative experience with medicine, due to “going through transgender help and as someone who has really severe chronic pain — both things that doctors don’t really like to believe people have because they’re not necessarily visual.”

He also draws inspiration extensively from sideshow and circus history. When he sees these pictures from the past, “I look at them and think this looks like me and my friends,” he says. “It was a lot of trans people and a lot of disabled people with nontraditional bodies, so I feel like I relate.” However, he’s very careful about which images he pulls from because of the controversial history of sideshows and circuses. “I don’t need to profit off of someone’s images who has already been used in that way for centuries,” he says.

Due to time restrictions, I wasn’t able to add one of Hobrecker’s flash designs to my tattoo collection. I browsed the book so much while talking to him that I basically memorized it, but once an image of a sitting garden woman called out to me, our interview was coming to an end. (I now know I truly wanted her because I saw on Hobrecker’s Instagram that someone else recently picked her out, and a pang of jealousy hit me.) Talking to Hoebreker nevertheless offered a different type of permanent change for me, though.

Next time I visit Hobrecker’s studio, I’m more likely to select something randomly than when I first went there. This specific part of our conversation will pop in my head when I thumb through his flash book once again: “I think that the image can just be something that’s fun, something that you vibe with. The meaning can be much more in making a commitment to a permanent change to yourself.”

Want more inspiration? Here are our favourite tattoo ideas from Instagram:

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onlinemarketingcamp-blog · 6 years

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The Newbie's Overview of Facebook

Against all odds, you likely know someone who still hasn't succumbed to the lure of Facebook. Maybe you’re a beginner yourself. Or perhaps you just haven’t had the gosh darn time to explore every last corner of the world’s most expansive social network.

Below, we offer a refresher course for those eager to learn more about the basics of Facebook. Let’s take a social stroll through the network’s main features, policies and culture norms.

Even if you’re a pro, it’s fun to look at the platform through a beginner’s eyes. If you were a Facebook virgin, what would you think of the social network?

1. Timeline Before you begin searching for friends, it’s important to complete your Timeline (aka your personal profile), which includes everything from uploading a profile picture and cover photo to outlining your employment history to determining your relationship status (OK, that’s optional). It’s called a timeline because you can include information, important milestones and memories spanning your entire life. Timeline is incredibly nuanced, and encourages you to include as much detail as possible, and many, many people do — so, don’t be shy!

Check out these additional resources for building the best Timeline:

Facebook Timeline: The Complete Guide

Facebook Timeline: 10 Simple Tips and Tricks

How to Fill Out Facebook Timeline Without Annoying Your Friends

2. Friends Once you’ve filled out a healthy portion of your Timeline, start searching for and adding “friends.” Trust us, you won’t be at a loss. Chances are, many of your co-workers, family members, classmates and neighbors are already on the network. Search for them in the search box that appears on the top of the site.

As you accumulate friends, Facebook will be able to suggest additional contacts as its algorithm generates connections among your growing network. You’ll see a list of suggested friends on Facebook’s homepage, in the “People You May Know” sidebar.

3. News Feed Finding friends on Facebook is incredibly important, not simply to connect for connection’s sake, but to stay up to date on their latest news, thoughts, activities, whereabouts and tastes. And the place to access that information is the News Feed.

Once you’ve logged into Facebook, the first thing you'll see is the News Feed. There you’ll view friends’ status updates, new photos, links to articles, etc. One of the most recent changes Facebook made to its News Feed is the order in which updates appear. Facebook’s algorithm and your own activity determine what “news” is most important, and thus, whether it makes the top of your News Feed. Think of it like the front page of a newspaper, determined by an algorithm rather than an editor. Therefore, you won’t necessarily see updates in the order they’re posted, but in order of timeliness and “importance.”

If you prefer to see things in chronological order, simply click the "Sort" option at the top of your feed and select "Most Recent."

Here are some more ways to customize your Facebook News Feed.

Customizing Your Facebook News Feed

OPEN GALLERY

1. Top Stories or Most Recent

The quickest and easiest edit to your news feed is to be found at the top of your home page.

Click on "Sort" and you get the option to see just "Top stories" or "Most recent."

"Top stories" means you're letting Facebook's algorithms decide what's most important.

Facebook says this is decided by "lots of factors," including your relationship to the person who posted the story, how many comments and likes it got, what type of story it is, etc.

The "Most Recent" option will return to your news feed to a more chronological order.

Show As List

4. The Status Update A status update is anything important to you at a particular moment in time that you deem shareable with Facebook friends. Through a status update, you can communicate your present activity or whereabouts (via a “check-in”), post a link to an interesting article or site, share photos and videos, and even create a poll.

Create a status update either from the News Feed or from the top of your Timeline.

However, I recommend first taking a look at many of your friends’ status updates before launching into your own. Each person has his or her own style and frequency, but many newbies aren’t aware of typical Facebook “etiquette” when it comes to updates. In general, Facebook users resent "spammy" updates — in other words, sharing every single activity on your schedule and thought in your brain (“I just boarded the 6:05 train”). Boring. These days, Facebook is a space for sharing valuable information and fostering conversation. It's not a platform for minutiae.

Check out these additional resources on statuses and status etiquette:

10 Things You Can Fit Into Your 63,206-Character Facebook Status This Is Why You Were Friended or Unfriended [STUDY]

5. Brands Although a major part of Facebook, friends are not the only entities with whom you can interact. Most major brands and a growing number of small businesses use Facebook to engage with, share deals and seek feedback from consumers and fans. Companies like Coca-Cola and Disney have tens of millions of fans interested in the latest company news and culture.

Take stock of the brands you’d like to follow, search for their timelines and “like” them on Facebook. You’ll start seeing their updates appear in the News Feed right alongside those of your friends. Feel free to interact with brand updates.

For more on how brands use Facebook, see these resources:

Facebook Timeline for Brands: The Complete Guide

The Evolution of Facebook for Brands

Check out what some creative brands have done with Facebook's Timeline.

20 Creative Facebook Brand Page Cover Photos

OPEN GALLERY

1. Red Bull

Not only has Red Bull taken advantage of Timeline, it has also created a scavenger hunt with prizes to get fans interacting with the company's history.

Show As List

6. The “Like” Button One of the most powerful tools on Facebook, the “like” button not only communicates your support of activities, brands, articles and products to fellow users, but also to Facebook and third parties. The “like” button lives on nearly every piece of Facebook content: status updates, photos, comments, brands timelines, apps and even ads.

However, you’ve probably also seen Facebook “like” and share buttons on external sites: shopping, news publications, mobile and social apps, and ads. These sites are utilizing Facebook's social plugins. When you “like” something outside of Facebook.com, it appears on your timeline, where friends can comment on the activity.

When Facebook expanded this functionality outside of Facebook.com, it opened up a rich social layer that most social networks had never before imagined. On the other hand, keep in mind that Facebook keeps track of your “like” activity and uses it to “improve the quality” of ads on the site. If sharing that kind of data makes you nervous, you’re not alone. Just be mindful that Facebook can share this behavioral data with third parties. For more information, see Facebook’s full data use policy.

7. Tagging

Facebook tagging means you can mention and directly link to another Facebook user, whether in photos, status updates, check-ins or comments. For instance, when you tag someone in a photo, that user will receive a notification, and the tagged photo will appear on his timeline — that is, unless he has disabled the tagging feature.

The tagging tool fosters conversation and creates additional connections among users. If I want my mother to see an article I posted on Facebook, I'll tag her in the update by typing her name — Facebook autofills with friend suggestions for easier tagging (see above). "Hey Anne Warber (a.k.a. mom), I thought you'd like this article about pandas!"

Check-in and photo tagging work a little differently. When you check in at a location, you can add Facebook friends who are with you by searching for their names, and thus, tagging them. Tag friends in photos by selecting the "tag photo" option at the bottom of the selected image.

It's important to remember that everyone has a different preference when it comes to tagging. Some people will instantly view content they've been tagged in and subsequently remove it, for any number of reasons: They don't like how they look in a photo, they don't like people knowing where they are, etc. Be aware of their concerns for privacy and your own.

Head to Privacy Settings > Timeline and Tagging to adjust your own settings, should you wish to review tags before they're posted or control who can see your tags.

Facebook recently introduced a hashtag system similar to Twitter. A hashtag can be added to any post — a status update, a photo, a link, etc. Just know that any status, photos or other Facebook updates with a hashtag will be visible in searches. You can search for posts with specific hashtags by typing the hashtag in the search bar at the top of the page.

8. Privacy

Frankly, we could write an entire book on Facebook privacy. But in the interest of time, we’ll mention the major types of privacy you need to be aware of as a Facebook user.

Inter-user privacy: Friends with your boss on Facebook? Consider adding him or her to a “list.” Then you can choose what updates they can view. You may also choose to limit certain lists from viewing posts other people tag you in by visiting the basic privacy settings.

Public profile: You can control the information non-friends can see on your public profile. Almost every feature of your profile has an edit option, which allows you to select who can view that information (public, friends only, only you, etc.). Learn more here.

Third-party access: In order to use Facebook Open Graph apps like Spotify and Pinterest, those companies need to access certain information on your profile. They’ll ask for permissions before you begin using the app. Be aware that each app has different privacy risks. If you don’t want that information to be accessible through Facebook’s APIs, learn how to turn off access. Similarly, you can also opt out of Facebook social ads — the ads that appear to you based on brands your friends like.

Facebook privacy can be complicated. See our additional privacy guides for more detailed information:

The New Facebook: How to Take Control of Your Privacy

7 Big Privacy Concerns for New Facebook and the Open Graph

How Much Do Your Friends’ Facebook Apps Know About You?

9. Facebook Apps Built on the social network's Open Graph (a collection of your preferences, likes, interests and activity on Facebook and from around the web), Facebook apps allow you to personalize and enhance your participation on the social network. They can add anything from games (FarmVille) to photo albums to quizzes to music (Spotify). Most of Facebook’s apps come from outside developers that use Facebook’s API. Many represent strong partnerships and add additional social layers, like Washington Post Social Reader and Foursquare.

Enabling each Facebook app means granting that app permission to access data on your profile and post on your behalf. This often means sharing on your Timeline how you interact with that app. For example, when you use the Spotify app, the company will share songs you listen to on your Timeline for your friends to see and interact with — unless you choose to hide that activity. (Keep in mind many of these sharing options can be customized.)

A word of caution: Well-made apps can add a fun and engaging layer to your Facebook experience, but using too many of them or requesting others to join might annoy your friends (and in the worst cases, compromise their privacy). You should only use apps recommended by friends you trust, or provided by reputable companies.

10 Apps to Ease You in to Facebook Open Graph

OPEN GALLERY

1. Fab.com

Fab.com has integrated social shopping features with Facebook Timeline. You can add your purchases on Fab.com to your Timeline, and you can also opt to have your Fab username present or hidden. If you don't want every purchase shared on your Timeline, you can filter specific categories, such as gifts or adult purchases, so that they don't appear on your profile.

Image courtesy of Flickr, cloud_nine

Show As List

10. Subscribe When enabled, Facebook Subscribe reveals certain features and updates on your Timeline to the public. (Don’t worry, you can control what information people see.)

The feature is especially useful for celebrities and journalists and other public figures who wish to interact with fans or followers without granting them access to their private profiles. It's similar to Twitter’s very public and transparent nature. If a person has enabled Subscribe, you'll see the button on the top-right of his or her Timeline.

Many users opt out of Subscribe, choosing simply to interact with approved friends. But keep in mind that the tool may be useful for specific cases, such as making yourself a little more transparent when applying for a job (assuming everything is appropriate). You’re automatically subscribed to all your friends, but try searching for celebs or personalities who have enabled the feature — more are participating every day.

For more tips of getting the most out of Subscribe, check out these resources:

Facebook Subscribe Button: What It Means for Each Type of User

Facebook Subscribe for Journalists: What Works and What Doesn’t

5 Most Popular Musicians to Subscribe to on Facebook

5 Top Celebrities to Subscribe to on Facebook

11. Facebook Mobile

Facebook created a mobile app to supplement your desktop browsing. The app presents a scaled-down News Feed and simplified Timeline, but still offers a surprising amount of features. You can chat, use Facebook apps, add photos, view activity by list and, of course, post status updates.

The major distinguishing feature of Facebook mobile is the "check-in." While you still have the capability to check in via desktop, mobile users use Facebook’s location feature far more frequently, for obvious reasons. Visiting your favorite restaurant or taking your kids to a theme park? Let everyone know your whereabouts, and even tag friends who are with you.

This guide really just scratches the surface of Facebook's core features and culture. There's a lot more to explore, but this primer should get any Facebook newbie up to speed.

Article source: https://mashable.com/2012/05/16/facebook-for-beginners/#XhzPS5DXWuqu

#Facebook #Marketing #Social Media Marketing

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jmww67-blog · 7 years

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“Five Ways to Parent an Extreme Child Through Elementary School”

Parenting is messy and hard. Teaching is messy and hard. Both are exhausting beyond words. So this is a list from a teacher who is also the parent of a child with invisible disabilities that will help to educate educators and prepare parents for what parenting our children through public education might look like.

5. Build your village. Words don’t do this step justice. This is the most important thing you can do to arm yourself for the battle of public schooling children with invisible disabilities.

As parents of children with behavior disorders, we face judgment daily, but there is no glare like the look of an educator who makes you feel that he or she disapproves of your child or your ability to parent them.

Disclaimer: We need to admit that sometimes we take things like this personally when they weren’t intended in that way. I am both an educator and a mother of a child with behavioral disabilities, so I feel compelled to speak for both sides.

I have received daily notes, letters from daycare, calls to my work, referrals from the bus driver, and seen weeks of sad faces or heated notes in my son’s planner. They all have one thing in common: When I read them, it made me angry, hurt my feelings, or made me feel defeated, but it always made me defensive of my son.

I would think: “They just don’t understand.” “They can’t expect him to behave like all of the other kids!” “They are just nit-picking him.”

Regardless of how I might feel, until we can afford for one of us to stay home and to homeschool our son, or to send him to a private school (which will not be in the foreseeable future), we must be able to remain calm and keep the peace with his educators.

To do this, we must build our village. We must find people with whom we can connect with and reach out to—someone we can text at 7 a.m. when my son just threw his shoe, at 3 p.m. because he was kicked off the bus again, or at 10 p.m. when he screams in a voice straight from the nether realms, “You are the stupidest mommy I have ever known!” You need someone who hears you, someone who gets you, someone who lives your reality.

So when you get the fourth note from your child’s teacher saying that Sally couldn’t keep her hands to herself and she had to move her clothespin down for talking out of turn or moving during carpet time, you can call your fellow villagers and scream, “This is insane! Do they really expect her to be able to sit through a 30-minute story time!? Who can even do that!?”

4. Prepare for war. Parenting is an ugly job. It is food spills and dirty diapers and weird smells in your car. It is messy hair and a questionable number of days in a row without showering. It is carpooling and sports practices, homework and packing lunches. All of that is exhausting in a way that people who aren’t parents will never truly understand.

When you add to that the endless medication adjustments, calls to specialists, visits to new doctors in hopes for different results, IEP and case study meetings with schools, and scouring the shelves of multiple stores to find old packaging because my sensory processing disorder child refuses to eat the blueberry cereal bars he has eaten daily for two years because he swears that the new packaging makes it taste different—it can seem completely impossible.

Battling a teacher, a bus driver, a PTA mom, a guidance counselor, a school system will not come easy. There will be haters. There always are.

There will be parents who don’t know our children and who are unforgiving when our son hits their son on the playground because he was reacting to them being in their face and he couldn’t articulate the way it made him feel. They couldn’t process it fast enough to tell the teacher. They acted on their feelings out of impulse, and we weren’t there to intervene.

3. Understand that you won’t always be…understood. This one is painful. Truly. I can sit here and type these words knowing that this afternoon something will happen with my son that will cause me to go into a panic, get defensive, or lose control and lash out in anger at him. No one will fully understand what that feels like and, for that, I should be grateful.

Not every parent is cut out for our job. The children with whom we have been entrusted to raise—the ones who make us crazy, break our hearts, bruise our skin, and dent our walls—these are not children meant for just any run- of-the-mill parent.

Parenting is the hardest job you will ever have, but these kids….are, well, a special treat. Some moments they are the sweetest angels and you are reminded why you would do anything for them. But all that can change in a second. So we shouldn’t expect others to understand our journey, because it isn’t theirs to take.

The teachers try to maintain growing class sizes, battle issues each child brings in from home, and teach kids who are all on different levels of learning—usually all while outperforming their previous test scores and keeping a safe environment and impressing the other teachers with their Pinterest-perfect room décor. I know. It is brutal.

When we are met with the disapproving glance of other parents, the tired teacher, the principal whose mind is still in the meeting she just attended, or the guidance counselor who doesn’t really have time to counsel because he has to balance testing schedules with class schedules and credits and parent complaints, maybe it is us who should try to be understanding.

Please know that this comes from a mother who sat, unable to speak through sobs, while she showed the behavior chart to guidance counselors, teachers, and a principal where red pen had recorded four pages of physical outbursts from my son…over only two weeks. That did not include angry outbursts or refusal to comply on the basis of, “Oh, well, it’s a Tuesday.” This was only what he had done when his behavior escalated and became physical. I was crying. My hand holding the papers shook as the educators on the other side of the table told me that my son did not qualify for an IEP, a 504, or special accommodations. I felt utterly hopeless and as if they just did not understand.

You’re right. They don’t understand. And that is OK. But we must move on to step number two.

2. Keep fighting. For us, this battle will never end. So now that you’ve built your village and prepared for battle, get the armor out because you’re going to need it.

When people tell you that they cannot accommodate your daughter, you find another way.

When the teacher says she can’t give different work to your child, only extra work if they need to be challenged, you ask someone else.

When the school officials say they don’t offer a gifted program until third grade and your son is in kindergarten, you continue to go up the ladder until someone will hear you.

When the bus driver writes your child up again for not sitting still when his bus ride is an hour long and he can’t have his medicine until 3 o’clock, you calmly try to explain your situation. If they don’t listen, you go to the principal, the transportation manager, and whoever else will listen.

When I tell you to prepare for war, I certainly hope you won’t need the armor, but I’ve used mine many times and my child is only five.

Use your village so you don’t bust up in the school like an episode of Jerry Springer. Let your villagers calm you down, let you vent, and encourage you before you take the crazy train to the school board office. You laugh now, but the day will come!

Don’t stop fighting. Many times, especially while our children are very young, we are their only voice. Keep fighting for them. Our children need to know that we are their biggest advocates.

1. Breathe.You will cry in meetings. It is inevitable. At least it is for me, because that is what I do when I am overwhelmed and angry and can’t just flip out like I want to do.

In order for me to survive, I need to understand that, while it may feel like they just have no clue about my child or they are personally attacking my ability to parent him, they are (in most cases) sincerely trying to do the best they can while following school policies and procedures.

As a teacher, I can tell you that what is best for the individual child doesn’t always follow the handbook. What this means for me as the parent of a child with multiple behavioral disabilities, a sensory disability, and who is also academically gifted, is that I have to breathe a lot. Sometimes it is because I don’t feel truly heard by Briggs’s school, but usually it is because my husband and I are forced to make a decision without knowing for certain if it is the right choice for him.

We were told to consider skipping him a grade or even two. I laughed. I mean, this is the kindergartner who just de-pants himself at a birthday party for comfort and you think he can handle his life with eight-year-olds!? No ma’am. But, academically, we do fight an uphill battle, because when he is bored he acts out, so he must remain challenged.

So, breathe. It won’t always make sense, but if we act out like our children do, it won’t solve anything. You know, like we tell them when they are on the brink of a complete loss of insanity?

1A. Don’t be afraid to try what no one else will. What works for other children is unlikely to work for our kids. So, while Legos are a great mind activity for our son, they are also the source of many a meltdown because a piece that is nearly invisible to the human eye just won’t fit quite how he wants it. So the bucket goes flying and a barrage of tiny blocks that seem to be made of shrapnel rain down from the ceiling.

Some kids can read independently and sit quietly at their desks; others may be able to play educational games on a tablet or keep their hands in their laps while sitting criss-cross applesauce during circle time. Those children are not my son.

Don’t be afraid to try what seems different or weird. Most days, my kid eats dinner standing up. My son sleeps a lot of nights on the hardwood floor, he rolls his shorts up to lengths only known by men on the golf course over 70. And when he needs to calm himself, he punches a punching bag and hits his head on the couch cushions. I no longer question his process. We roll with what works at the time.

This road is long. Public education for children with invisible disabilities may be ugly, and it may get messy, but I can assure you that if you build your village, you ready yourself for battle, you understand that you might not always be understood, you never stop fighting, and you remind yourself to breathe, that we will all get through this and our children will be the stronger for our efforts.

https://www.additudemag.com/parenting-extreme-adhd-ld-elementary-public-school/

#antibullying #childrenwithdisabilities #childrensrights #cyberbullying #fape #dailydoseoflaw

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