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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 8 months

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HIIII!!!!!!!!

I LOVE your human au and would be delighted If you could expound on Wally's relationship with the cast and how he views/ is viewed by others <3

I hope you have a good day/ night whenever you are and I wish your pillow always be cold 🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️

ofc! i've been thinking about it a lot!

i would like to begin by saying that, as with canon, everyone likes Wally. as they should! i think that's an Important tidbit that should always carry across, at least in some way

Wally is... i think it's also important that he's a kind person. he loves deeply, is very forgiving and accepting, and he's just. he's a bizarre little man, and he's wonderful! there is not a malicious bone in his body! he finds delight & beauty in everything he can. he looks at his friends and is filled with deep contentment and joy and love. he's not blind to their flaws (and certainly not his own), but he never minds. those flaws are part of his friends, and he loves every bit of them!

and ok. Wally is not nearly as naive in this au as he is in canon. bc he's had a different life! he's had a rough go of it! unfortunately there's next to no way for normal people to grow up completely innocent & naive & pure, yk? life is harsh. Wally is not spared. he's incredibly kind despite it all. he's still in love with life and humanity. he smiles at strangers in the street & stops to watch bees pollinate flowers & sees parts of his friends in everything. he has many intense feelings even if he doesn't really show it or know how to convey them! he believes in the inherent goodness of people & beauty of being human!

there is a... very wide range of how people (outside of the Neighbors) view Wally. a lot of people find him slightly unsettling and really fucking weird, and well. he is! he's strange, and it's a wonderful part of him! but many don't see it that way. so he was ostracized by his peers in school (all the way through college), his coworkers (the few times he held a job before becoming a full-time artist), and most people in his local community. they just don't get him. they don't See him. Wally doesn't mind all that much! all of the important people in his life accept and love him for who he is, and he wouldn't even think of changing to fit the mold others want to shove him into.

then of course there are the people who treat him like a child, bc ableism is a thing and Wally's very noticeably autistic (even if people only notice subconsciously). this i think would be one of the very few things that outright annoys Wally, even if he doesn't really show it. but then there's the people who, while they might not get him (especially not to the extent his friends do), they accept him. like much of the art community he's involved in - even if a lot of them completely misinterpret his personality / mannerisms. they're all like "ohhhh he's so mysterious and ruminant" that's the 'tism, babes

BUT! YOU ASKED ABOUT SPECIFICALLY HIM AND THE NEIGHBORS! we'll save Barnaby for last since that's. uh. i have a lot to say about it. it's Very Complex in my mind

collectively, all of them love Wally a lot. which i've said! We Know! they also (mostly subconsciously) look for his approval - he's got a certain level of charisma that makes them all want him to like them. which, he does. obviously. unconditionally. and they're all protective of him & very patient with him. i think that's both a result of his natural rizz, how kind & patient he is with them, how well they understand him, and how he's a pacifist. he's their guy and woe befall anyone who dares cross him. (essentially, all of them collectively: the only constant is suffering - omg Wally!!! 💖💖💖)

we'll start with Frank! before he got to know Wally, he thought that Wally was an aloof asshole who thought he was better than everyone. then they started to directly interact and Frank realized "oh you're literally the nicest person i've ever met & also surprisingly relatable. you're just like me fr'. did he have a lil crush on Wally? yes. im saying it now literally everyone in the friend group (except local lesbians poppy & sally) has had at least a teensy crush on Wally at some point. but Frank deeply appreciates Wally's company & his complete lack of judgement. and how he gladly will let Frank talk for hours on end, chiming in with questions to prompt him to talk more! he also appreciates Wally's calm demeanor and vibes. he's one of those people that even when overwhelmed, Frank can handle having Wally around. he's like a human capybara! if Frank needs/wants a buddy with him for Situations, his go-to (after Julie ofc, though depending on the situation he'd pick Wally first) is Wally, since Wally Gets It. also Wally is unafraid to be like "wow, this kinda sucks! we're leaving", thus giving Frank an easy out. they just get along very well! ofc Frank can get frustrated with Wally, but then again he gets frustrated w/ everyone. but since Wally is patient with him, Frank tries to return the favor. also he's gotten into several fistfights over Wally's honor

Julie! she loves Wally so fucking much! he's her lil guy! even if he's kinda boring in a way! he's not very good at games or sports & would rather go on a relaxing walk than play Just Dance, but hey! he always makes Attempts, and she appreciates that! when they were younger and Julie & Sally & Poppy had girls nights (they continue to have girls' nights but everyone is involved. they still call it that tho), they'd often include Wally bc, yk! he's chill like that! Julie also massively respects his ability to say "no thank you" to anything without compromise. if he ever says it to her, she knows that he doesn't mean Any ill will by it! there's a sort of comfort in that! she knows she can be herself around him! also he's just... very good company. he's a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold, a willing victim & confidante for elaborate schemes! he visits her at work Purely because he knows it delights her to see a friendly face in the middle of a grueling shift! he's always been a bit of a lighthouse to her!

and while Sally can be a little exasperated with how literal Wally is, she finds no small amount of solidarity with him As A Fellow Artist. when they first became friends, they caught on like a house on fire! she mentioned the artistic side of theater, and Wally was immediately on board. then and going forward Wally is always willing and more than happy to assist with painting sets, art advertisements for her performances, etc! they have little brainstorming sessions where she rambles about what she wants sets / costumes to look like, and Wally sketches them out! since Sally was a theater kid and goes on to work in that department (locally, usually), Wally often gets first read of her scripts. Sally highly values Wally's opinion and input. if he's free, sometimes he helps teach the actors' the show choreography. Sally runs through it with him, Wally soaks up the moves like a sponge & memorizes them, and hey! he loves to teach! Sally just. she loves him a lot. they're both artists of a sophisticated nature <3

Howdy thinks Wally is real neat! Wally is good company and is (often unintentionally) hilarious! he's also like... the one person Howdy refuses to scam in any way shape or form. tricking grandmas into buying more than they need? no sweat. tricking Wally into spending slightly more money than intended? Howdy feels like a fucking monster. but yeah, Howdy's just always delighted to see Wally! he likes Wally's unique view of the world and often takes it into consideration when making decisions. when he's stuck on something, he thinks WWWD (what would Wally do!). Howdy also is the one who most often accompanies Wally to his art shows & the like, bc he knows that Wally will accept the first price offer he hears - and Howdy is determined that his incredible works of art are paid for their worth! nobody is gotta cheat his pal outta a single cent! he just likes having Wally around, you know?

Wally & Poppy have an interesting relationship, i think! he tells the cashier "she asked for no pickles" for her! she makes sure he always has a soft place to land! he kinda confuses her, but she finds it endearing in a way? he displays a personality/behavioral quirk and she's like "oh. well alright!" and rolls with it very gracefully. they appreciate each other's mellow demeanor and proclivity for peace. Poppy knows she can always have a nice, quiet conversation with him over tea (even if he doesn't drink it!). and he's always willing to help with anything and everything she needs, no question. i think i've made this joke on this blog before but! in way! he's her emotional support animal lmao. a hand to squeeze to death on an airplane! also it's funny for me to picture a 6'8 woman hunched behind this 5'2 shrimp of a man as if he can hide her

it takes a little bit for Eddie to adjust to Wally's bizarre nature! like i've said, Eddie connects with the group when they're all in their late 20s. he hasn't had over a decade of being friends with Wally like the rest of them. he likes Wally plenty! definitely grows to love him! but it's an adjustment. Wally consistently startles him very easily (Wally is naturally quiet and has a habit of appearing out of nowhere), and Eddie has a hard time getting a read on him. most people do! and also Wally is very handsome/pretty, and that throws Eddie off a bit (it's hard to think when someone so attractive is staring directly into your eyes without blinking) but once he gets somewhat used to Wally & understands as much as he can, he very much appreciates Wally's company & friendship! they find (somewhat subconscious) solidarity in being the kindest and most helpful people in the clique! and Wally is a wonderful island of peace in a turbulent world. Eddie never minds sitting with him for a cup of coffee in the early morning during his route, even if it means his workday ends a few minutes later than usual.

other supporting cast like Wally as well. Ms. Beagle kinda views him as a second son! the Joyful siblings will always find him a little weird and unsettling, but they're nice enough to him. Howdy's family thinks he's neat. etc! but lets talk about Barnaby!

Wally is literally everything to Barnaby. that's his person. there is literally no one that comes before Wally in his eyes and heart. their relationship is and always has been very nontraditional To Me (in this au and somewhat how i view them overall! its complicated!). Wally never subscribed to or understood societal norms, and as a result, Barnaby wound up pretty much shunning them as well when it comes to his lil buddy. their relationship isn't romantic - Wally is very aro and Barnaby just does not feel that way about him, not really. but at the same time it's certainly not entirely platonic!

neither of them can imagine being separated. they met in 7th grade and have been glued together ever since. they've been through some tough shit together! they know each other better than anyone! you cannot have one without the other! they're more than a package deal - they're Inseparable! Barnaby has had many a nightmare of Wally leaving in one way or another, and it scares him more than anything. to him, he can weather any storm as long as Wally is by his side. they obviously don't spend every moment together, but at the end of the day they always come home to each other.

Barnaby just... he loves and respects and values Wally so much. he wants his approval, his attention, his company. sometimes he scares himself by considering the lengths he'd go to for Wally. there is no one he's more comfortable with or feels he understands / is understood by. if somebody has a problem with Wally, they have a problem with Barnaby. if Wally jumped off a cliff, Barnaby would not hesitate to leap after him! Wally says jump, Barnaby asks how high! he's not a violent person at all, but teen Barnaby once broke a bully's jaw for goin' a little too far w/ Wally

is their relationship a smidge unhealthy? a lil codependent? yes <3 yes it is <3 but we all know that Wally would never use this against Barnaby. on his side of the coin, Barnaby is his person as well! Wally has never imagined his life without Barnaby because it just does not occur to him that that's a possibility. there are many things that only Barnaby knows about Wally, sides only he's seen. there's complete & unconditional trust/love between them. they hotbox Home together <3

#ough that was a lot of word vomit i hope its coherent!#this is a sort of character study imo! in a way! of a sort!#which ive said but i like to Restate!#but yeah all the main guys get along with / love wally and vice versa!#what would they do without him <3 #i think its important that wally is somewhat... uh... Out Of Place in whichever setting he's in #in canon he's exactly where & what he's made for and yet he's still incredibly Different #and when au-crafting the fun in them is echoing the source. we've just taken a step to the left!#anyway anyway #sally and wally have a place in my heart for this au #they're besties! classy artists!#wally is always allowed on set / backstage!#rambles from the bog #wh modern human au #and obvs it isnt all sunshine and roses #but im doing my best to Sum Up The General Emotions and Overall Relationships!#barnaby & wally's is especially fascinating to me #like... if they lost each other they'd probably die of a broken heart lmao #i mean during the I Put Wally Darling In The Hospital arc barnaby is ~pining away~ and wally's gonna be fine #he's in his hospital bed watching psych reruns #meanwhile barnaby is at home not eating not sleeping just sitting in wally's studio & brooding #oh also. subject change but this occurred to me and the meme is Accurate #howdy: this is my husband barnaby! & this is barnabys platonic life partner wally!

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betweenlands · 6 months

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so like do people understand there's a difference between "i dislike this thing because it's cliched" and "i dislike this thing because the person who made it personally bullied a friend of mine, used their platform as a big name fan to send their own fans after other people in similar ways, harassed one of the hermits off tumblr, and made the fandom incredibly inhospitable to anyone who didn't align with Their Specific Opinions" or

#the fic itself was mid. i have read it. i'm not a fan of the author's godawful attitude #and the way that entitled attitude has poisoned fandom to this day #so you'll forgive me if i dislike a fic that's held up as one of the greatest things of all time #on account of its author being just absolutely godawful to the people around them #and genuinely setting back the fandom several years in terms of overall maturity and conduct #and all this for a fic that is just... solidly mid. the h*rry p*tter of fics really.#salt #txt #orig #misc #anyway i cannot believe i had to unfollow someone over this but i draw the line at being called ignorant over disliking this thing #as though i don't have an INCREDIBLY GOOD REASON for doing so.

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bespectacledbun · 9 months

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˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ a little lovemail for Emma ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

because I went on a little rant on discord recently about how capable she is and how much she’s overlooked by the fandom. too often I see comments saying she’s weak, or incompetent, or a glorified therapist for the princes when she’s not; Emma is honestly incredibly intelligent, but I feel people always forget to consider that she’s a) a commoner b) a woman c) in a medieval fantasy setting, and hold her to modern standards, which is... a little unfair

so I wanted to give her a little love too 💌

she knows three languages, two of which are entirely self taught—court french (Chevalier’s route) and japanese (Rio’s route)

she doesn’t stop there, though; she proceeds to learn even more languages after getting her happily ever after. in Luke’s post-route stories she knows at least 4 languages, and in Chevalier’s post-route stories she knows more than 5 languages and is actively learning more

while I’m on the topic, LITERACY. I think people often forget that “education for all” was not a thing until the 18th century, and before then only merchants and nobility got proper educations. Emma holding a clerical job as a commoner IS an admirable quality for her social status and the time period ikepri is set in

she’s a great entrepreneur. she opens a book-lending business (Chevalier’s route), as well as her own bookstore and a school (both in Clavis’s route)

not only does she pick up on court etiquette and skills (music, dance, diplomacy, politics) in less than a month, she’s also able to learn ministerial duties and absolutely kicks ass at it (Sariel’s route)

she knows how to play not only to her own strengths and weaknesses, but also to that of others around her. she’s able to broker bargains with many of the suitors (Chevalier, Nokto, Silvio, Sariel) across routes to get the information and/or help that she needs

another thing I see often is because she doesn’t say “no” to the princes and that somehow makes her weak, or easier to push around—there’s a world of power difference between her and the suitors. emma being able to hold her ground against the princes as she does, while navigating an entirely new battlefield of court politics and high society, is an excellent testament to her mental fortitude and character

she’s a skilled horseback rider (all routes) and swimmer (Jin’s events) way before she comes to the castle, and she eventually learns martial arts for self defense from Licht (Licht’s events)

she taught herself first aid and nursing, and is proficient enough to become a battle medic in many of the routes (Chevalier, Licht, Yves). emma also goes on to properly learn medicine to become a licensed doctor (Keith’s route)

“Belle” isn’t just a role that Emma plays for a month; it’s a political position with a LOT of power. there is a reason why she observes the princes so closely, there’s a reason why she hides it and why she doesn’t let her feelings for the princes determine whether they are fit to rule or not. she can change Rhodolite’s governmental administration entirely, whether it’s directly, by naming a particular king, and thus a particular set of policies that will affect the entire kingdom— or indirectly, by influencing their views on how to rule. her first priority will always, ALWAYS be protecting her home and her people, regardless of who she’s in a relationship with; Emma is a kingmaker, not arm candy.

there’s probably more that I can’t remember off the top of my head but my point is—– Emma isn’t just a pretty face and a kind voice to the princes. the reason the suitors fall in love with her isn’t because she’s the therapist who “fixes” them, it’s because she’s intelligent, brave, and a really hard worker. she stands by her convictions and morals no matter who she’s against and is determined to achieve her goals regardless of what stands in her way

is emma a little idealistic about her job and wanting a fairy tale romance? yes. does she try to solve her problems through nonviolence instead of action? also yes. but it doesn’t make her any less of a person or diminish her skills and worth because she’s not ambitious or assertive enough. she’s content with her life and her relationships, but she still strives to improve herself and help the people around her, and I think that makes her both a great character and a great woman

#random ramblings #ikepri emma #emma de villenueve #sorry I always get a little mad when I see ppl complain that she doesn't stand up for herself and act the way a 21st century woman would #because it diminishes a LOT of her strength and intellect and makes it feel like you have to be loud and aggressive to be strong #particularly as a woman in a medieval fantasy setting. it's like measuring a fish by its ability to climb a tree #I will defend her until my dying breath idc emma is incredibly accomplished for a woman of her status in the setting she's currently in #you play a game that’s explicitly a medieval fantasy setting and then act shocked and surprised she acts like a medieval woman??#the tags a much angrier than theyre supposed to be all of this is is semiserious lmao #but also stop slandering my daughter she's way more capable that ppl give her credit or acknowledgement for

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feline-evil · 3 months

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Never gonna be over how unutterably pathetic and in dire need of ANY kind of companionship or friendship that doesn't revolve around their band the entirety of dethklok are. I love these horrible idiots who are so devoid of any real connections outside of themselves that they will latch onto anyone unfortunate enough to get too close to any one of them! And GOD help anyone they latch onto!!

#jay talkin #metalocalypse #im thinking about the doubles episode where they just seem genuinely happy to have 'friends'#who arent like. industry people. these men are so starved of any kind of connection #and it takes them four seasons a rock opera and a movie to realise they can find that in each other lmao #also thinking about how quickly any of them bond and become really intense abt anyone in their life #aka: NATHAN TOWARDS ABIGAIL. oh dear poor abigail oh dear #but also toki to damn near anyone and this goes for the entire band tbh as well they all do this at least once #and yeah its mainly cuz 10min eps mean u gotta progress stuff fast #but also holy shit. charles these boys want friends so bad u gotta set em up on playdates or smth #maybe it'd get some of their dumb stupid idiot energy out and they'd be better behaved. well. no they wldnt but... u can dream #i do think theres smth to be said that yeah all of dethklok are cool theyre metal superstars they r good at what they do #theyre also fucking prophesised saviours too and theyre also incredibly dangerous idiots and terrible ppl #but never forget that they are also. so so SO pathetic and isolated and dysfunctional #these men have not lived in the real world in decades and are disconnected and unsocial and spoilt and u can see that this does impact #the way they interact w the world! they need like. anything other than the band in their lives hah. they do need to pal around #im glad they find that in each other eventually!!#i dont want 2 sound like im babying them or infantilising them these r grown asshole idiot men but like. listen these shitheards r lonelyyy #everyone in their lives is like. assigned to be there and is set as beneath them in a class and workbased system #they dont rlly have ppl who r just there cuz they like em. outside of fans. and fans arent rlly a real connection yknow #their only connections come via work networking sex and violence and worship baby!!!! its fucked up!

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anotherpapercut · 9 months

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the girlbossification of ruth bader ginsburg has to be one of the most just plain annoying aspects of white liberal feminism. like it's not as actively harmful as a lot of other shit obviously. but it is soooooo annoying. if I never see another notorious rbg tote bag as long as I live it will be too soon

#her opinions and amicus' in many cases were iconic! not denying that certainly. she is absolutely AMONG the better justices in us history #HOWEVER her record on policing/the carceral system is very bad! genuinely bad!#and she just would not hold the conservative justices accountable. her and kagan are way too placating #and then she refused to retire in 2009 when there was a sitting democratic president and a fucking DEMOCRATIC SUPER MAJORITY #saying basically that no one else could do the job as well as her which is insane because sotomayor and KBJ literally are better :/#its also unbelievably conceited and just incredibly fucking selfish to knowingly doom the country because you think youre hot shit #started ranting abt this at work bc literally any talk even adjacent to the supreme court will set me off abt all of us court history #and my coworker was like 'well i dont think its very fair that she had to have that much riding on her decision to retire'#it literally is fair because that is the fucking job that she signed up for. this has literally always been how it fucking works #its a lifetime appointment. you either die unexpectedly or retire strategically #she accepted a position in which the entire country would depend on her but its not fair for the entire country to depend on her???#bullshit #im not fucking buying it. she did this knowing roe would likely be struck down as a result #she should absolutely be held accountable for that lmfao. you can know that she had a hand in a lot of great decisions for this country #while also knowing that she did a fucked up and extremely selfish thing

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andmaybegayer · 3 months

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they should invent a phone call that doesn't completely destroy your mental focus and doesn't take any time.

#i. do not hate my daily family call. but it is incredibly disruptive and i hate that.#there is simply no way to schedule around an event that occurs randomly and requires between fifteen minutes and two hours #because halfway through your brother decides to set up Plex

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 8 months

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End of Empathy (time for violence)

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan jingyi #jin ling #lan sizhui #We are back to the present! Honestly I think I'm going to try and truncate the rest of this arc.#I LOVE yi-city and I really appreciate all of the support the yi-city lovers have given me. And the patience of those who aren't.#But it's been two months. And I need to move this along </3 #Anyways; I love the start of ep 3 so much. The worried concern of the juniors is so cute #but the crown jewel by far is wwx responding like a parent that's very hungover but trying so hard to be nice about it #like 'shhh shhhh guys hi I'm up now. Can you keep the volume down. Can you get me some water and my sunglasses from the glovebox.'#and of course the incredible wham line of 'Xue Yang Must Die.'#'Is YX irredeemable? I'm pro 'everyone is capable of change and deserves a chance.' So Im of the camp of 'if he had the opportunity...maybe #The issue is that this setting has no structure to provide those opportunities. You are perceived as a threat therefor you must die #XY is a very interesting parallel to the YLLZ because they both meet the same fate: outsiders determining that they need to be killed #plus both did war crimes. I know it's easy to forget the YLLZ actually did do some of the things he was accused of (most wrong)#but wwx also has blood on his hands. He also sought revenge in pretty twisted ways. Both were given opportunities to step away and refused #The difference is that we empathize with and like XXC & SL and A-Qing. The Narrative says they were wronged and that is an injustice.'

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thedreadvampy · 5 months

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My housemate is moving out in January

She told us this a week or two ago, when she sat down and, after sitting with us watching TV for over an hour, said "hey so I bought a house and I'm moving out. We agreed on 2 months notice so I won't move until the end of January."

The last time she talked in the immediate terms about buying a house was in 2021, when the sale she was working on fell though and she was unemployed so it was a "when I'm back in a position to look I'll start looking again." Since then I've occasionally asked her how she's doing on the house buying front and she's been like "oh I'm getting there financially" but hasn't mentioned anything concrete.

She didn't tell us she was looking at places. She didn't tell us she had put in an offer. She told us when the offer was finalised. A week AFTER she emailed the letting agent about getting out of her part of the lease. And, it increasingly feels like, only because the letting agent's response was that we had to agree to change the lease.

The letting agent's response (which our housemate obviously didn't copy us into; we had to follow up separately and they copied us into the email chain) also includes that when we change the lease, they're empowered to change the rent, quote, "no cap". Rent was already going up in January - there's no possibility of Sam and I paying her share of the rent.

The really fucking upsetting thing is we're not strangers. This isn't a casual "housemate we found on flatshare" thing. She and Sam have lived together literally their entire adult lives. Me and her have known each other well over a decade. I lived in her and Sam's flat when I was homeless. We were the first people she came out to as trans. We're not super close but I thought we were fucking friends. And she's literally gone out of her way to not talk to us about this for what must have been months while the sale completed - which means she's lied to my face at least once cause I've asked her about her finances in that time (cause she's in a job she hates that she only took to get the house money, so it's like. when we've been commiserating about work stuff I'm often asking 'are you almost free?'). she literally went out of her way to talk to the letting agents before talking to us about putting us in a situation where we could lose our fucking home.

And she keeps. trying. to pretend nothing's happened. Every time I've seen her since then she's not mentioned anything or apologised or anything, she just keeps chatting away and offering hugs and fistbumps like nothing's happened. Like we're still fucking friends.

All it would take for us to still be friends and to be happy for her would have been one fucking sentence in the groupchat like "hey, just put an offer in on a house" or "I'm looking at properties, just so you know, that might happen in the next few months". Like nobody begrudges her for buying a house! It's very cool for her! She's 31 she's worked really hard to get the money I would love to be happy for her! Unfortunately she decided avoiding conflict is more important than giving the people she fucking LIVES WITH (who btw fronted her a month on the rent here while she was unemployed and agreed to take on a larger proportion of the move-in cost back in 2021, if we're still holding ourselves to shit we said 2.5 years ago), so no, you are not entitled to our friendship or to going back to normal.

like if she'd been honest with us it would have been something to process but we'd have had time to figure out our next steps. instead she's left us in a position where we have to find a new roommate before she gives her one month notice, which means finding someone by the end of December, which oh look that's the middle of the fucking Christmas holidays. and she didn't tell us anything until the START of December, or copy us into her conversation with the letting agent, meaning we still don't know what the rent on that space will be so we aren't yet in a position to advertise it. Has she offered to help find a roommate? Has she fuck. Has she offered to help out by moving her move-out date? Nah, she's moving as soon as she gets the keys because, quote, "that means her finances won't have to change". SOUNDS LOVELY. NOT HAVING YOUR FINANCES SUDDENLY CHANGE. I THINK THAT SOUNDS LIKE A REALLY REASONABLE FUCKING GOAL.

Thirteen fucking years she's lived with Sam. Four fucking weeks over Christmas she's left us to figure out a way to not turbofuck our living situation. And she's got the fucking nerve to try and pretend we should be interacting like nothing's changed. Jesus Christ. What a fucking unhinged way to treat...anybody, honestly. never mind the friends-your-entire-adult-life part. literally cannot imagine a scenario in which I would buy a house without telling the people I lived with.

(haha actually this is what my parents divorced over so apparently it's not unusual. although at least my dad had the decency to tell the woman he shared finances with at the point he put in an offer not the point the fucking sale went through.)

Like we'll be fine. It's a huge city centre flat with decent rent and queer housemates, hopefully even when the rent goes up it'll be an easy sell in a city with a huge housing shortage and big queer community. We've got a couple of people interested already, sight unseen - worst case scenario we have to live with someone we don't get on with. And it's given Sam and me a push to look at our own finances and as of today, we've got a mortgage decision in principle and can start looking at flats in the area - mind, we'll be transparent upfront and tell any prospective housemates that yeah, we're looking to buy and move out in the next 6-12 months, and we'll tell them if we put an offer in, because we're decent fucking people who aren't going to spring that on someone out of the blue.

But it's been I think 2 weeks and I'm so fucking angry I could spit. It's such a fucking betrayal. And frankly you know selfishly like. I just had a breakup a couple of months ago, I'm in the middle of moving jobs, both me and Sam have a history of housing instability and this has been the first decent, stable, safe, not-mouldy not-freezing home I think any of us have had, and this is so fucking triggering and upscuttling I could just start biting. like I was talking to my friend about it last week and it's just like. Can I have One Fucking Thing of the three main tentpoles of survival - home, work, relationships - that are fucking stable right now? because shit has been In Flux lately. and at least the work and relationship stuff has changed because of my decisions. going through all that work to make myself short-term unstable to gain long-term stability has been really hard and draining and then just as I was reaching the crisis point with work stuff BOOM, IT'S HOUSING INSTABILITY WITH A STEEL CHAIR. fuck. seriously fuck this and fuck her. we're going to make something good come of it but what a deeply, unbelievably shitty thing to do.

#red said #the other thing that bugs me about it is. ok and again this is old shit dredged back to 2021 when we moved in together #but i had my housemate. and Sam had her. and each of us were really close pairs who'd lived together a long time #and we tried looking for flats as a four but a) a flat with 4 good sized bedrooms in Edinburgh is hens teeth #and b) my housemate was pretty happy to live with me and Sam but increasingly felt like a 4 man flat was going to be a lot for him #and so in the end we talked about it. and through a combination of that and same housemate being in a pretty #unfavorable position housing wise. cause she was unemployed and had shit credit at that moment.#we agreed she'd move with us and Joe went and found a one bed #and in the end that's been really great for him tbh he's a lot happier and more confident and we were pretty sick of each other by then #and so we get on much better now #but at the time it was a real heartache i felt like I'd let Joe down i felt like our friendship was over #and honestly I have never been a huge fan of living with our current housemate. even before we lived here #like when i was staying with her and Sam too. she's incredibly messy and takes up a lot of space in conversations #I've always liked her as a person but she's exhausting and often unpleasant to share space with #and there's a bit of me that's like. we bent over backwards to accommodate you when you were precarious.#like it would have been WAY easier for us to look for a 2-bed during 2021. and if it was a 3-bed I'd have rather stayed with Joe.#but we moved with her for her sake. and she left Sam to clean up their old place (and there were Literal Rats)#and she got really pissy about driving the moving van even though a) that was her idea and b) she's the only person with a license #and c) i walked all MY shit over by hand anyway and the only reason she hired the van was to move her tv #me and Sam found all the core furniture. me and Sam sorted out all the viewings. me and Sam did all the planning. Sam set up all the bills.#we spotted her for rent!we took a bigger share of the costs! because we fucking cared about her and wanted her to have a fucking home!#and she can't even do us the courtesy you'd offer a fucking lodger you found on fucking gumtree

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