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mittensmorgul · 5 years

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8.01, We Need To Talk About Kevin.

and

8.02, What's Up, Tiger Mommy?

Dean's back from his vacation to Purgatory, again completely not processing Cas's decision to stay there. Much the same way Cas had refused to engage with his own guilt in the latter part of s7, Dean is now playing the same game with his own guilt and grief, battling feelings of worthlessness at not having been able to "save" Cas.

And like at the beginning of s7, he's once again lost Cas to Purgatory.

DEAN: Yeah, Cas didn't make it. SAM: What exactly does that mean? DEAN: Something happened to him down there. Things got pretty hairy towards the end, and he... just let go. SAM: So Cas is dead? You saw him die? DEAN: I saw enough. SAM: So, then what, you're not sure? DEAN: [turning back to SAM] I said I saw enough, Sam.

And here we have Dean refusing to face what happened...

Meanwhile we also learn how Sam has effectively been running away from his entire life again.

DEAN: I wasn't dead. [He stands up and walks around SAM.] In fact, I was knee-deep in God's armpit killing monsters, which, I thought, is what we actually do. SAM: Yes, Dean. And far as I knew, what we do is the thing that got every single member of my family killed. I had no one – no one. And for the first time in my life, I was completely alone. And, honestly, I-I didn't exactly have a roadmap. So, yeah, I-I fixed up the Impala, and I just... drove. DEAN: After you looked for me. [SAM says nothing.] Did you look for me, Sam? [SAM looks away.] Good. That's good. Now, we – we... always told each other not to look for each other. That's smart. Good for you. Of course, we always ignored that because of our deep, abiding love for each another, but not this time, right, Sammy? SAM: Look, I'm still the same guy, Dean. DEAN: Well, bully for you. I'm not.

And here we have the upcoming character conflict that will power us through all the rest of s8 (and s9, and s10... and through a good bit of s11) (welcome to Marshmallow Era).

(CROWLEY: Really, Dean, who writes your stuff? A marshmallow?)

DEAN: Nothing. Is that, uh, that how you rationalized taking a year off? People will be okay? SAM: People were okay, Dean. You're okay. DEAN: Wow. SAM: Look, I did what we promised we'd do. I moved on. I lived my life. DEAN: Yeah, no, I'm getting that. SAM: Look, it wasn't like I was... just oblivious. I mean, I read the paper every day. I saw the weird stories… [He sits down on the other bed facing DEAN] …the kind of stuff we used to chase. DEAN: And you said what? "Not my problem"? SAM: Yes. And you know what? The world went on. DEAN: People died, Sam. SAM: People will always die, Dean. Or maybe another hunter took care of it. I don't know, but the point is, for the first time, I realized that it wasn't only up to me to stop it.

Because this is what Sam has always tried to run away from. Only this time, Kevin was the fallout of it. I hate, hate, hate this. But heck, it does provide the drama for a good long time to come... fueling Sam's "penance" and self-sacrifice. Except it's coming from this deeply toxic place that Cas's came from in staying in Purgatory, and that Dean's will come from in taking on the Mark of Cain.

DEAN: Okay, if this kid is right, he's sitting on a bombshell. Hell, he is the bombshell. [SAM looks away.] What? SAM: That. I mean, there's no way that Kevin's getting out of this intact, is there? DEAN: Well, he's doing pretty well for himself so far. SAM: Yeah, he got out. DEAN: And now he's in it... whether he likes it or not. SAM: So...free will, that's only for you?

Aaaaahhahhhahhahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa >.>

Dear Sam: no. Dean's literally never had free will of his own. He literally gave it up the moment John put you in his arms and told him to run outside as fast as he could and not look back. Or... probably longer. Especially considering they're Chuck's favorite characters...

Does Dean like ANY of this? I mean, he's long ago accepted he's good at it. He's long ago accepted he's not really suited to any other sort of life. And he's long ago accepted that he's the kind of person who just can't sit by knowing that the bad stuff is still happening in the world, when there's a chance he might be able to stop it. He knows he can't just... know about it all, and just assume someone else will fix it, that it's not his problem anymore. Meanwhile, Sam believes (and has ALWAYS believed) that he absolutely could...

And all of this interpersonal crap continues into...

8.03, Heartache.

DEAN: All right, man, look, I get it. You took a year off to do yoga and play the lute, whatever, but I'm back. Okay, we're back, which means that we walk and kill monsters at the same time. We'll find Kevin. But in the meantime, do we ignore stuff like this? Or are innocent people supposed to die so that you can shop for produce?

DEAN: I don't know about you, but this last year has given me a new perspective. SAM: I hear you. Believe me. DEAN: I know where I'm at my best, and that is right here, driving down crazy street next to you. SAM: Makes sense. DEAN: Yes, it does. SAM: Or... maybe you don't need me. I mean, maybe you're at your best hacking and slicing your way through all the world's crap alone, not having to explain yourself to anybody. DEAN: Yeah, that makes sense, seeing as I have so many other brothers I can talk to about this stuff. SAM: Look, I'm not saying I'm bailing on you. I'm just saying make room for the possibility that we want different things. I mean, I want my time to count for something. DEAN: So, what we do doesn't count?

WELL THIS IS A MIXED BAG HERE IN CONTEXT, But in the larger context of the ongoing story, and where we know they go over the next 7 years, this... is tentatively a step in the right direction, despite it coming from a really fucked up toxic source here in the context of this episode.

Sam's spot on with the realization that they both might want different things, but right now Dean's just grateful enough to be alive and back in the real world to even think about what he might WANT, other than to return to the relatively normalcy he'd lost while in Purgatory. And for him, that's hunting on the road with Sam. The dude is NOT asking for a lot here, Sam.

Plus, Dean's already tried Sam's way, of living a normal life and pretending nothing bad exists in the world, and he HATED it, couldn't do it, and wouldn't chose that for himself again. He can't even begin to understand how Sam could pretend the vast majority of his life just didn't happen and go play house with someone as if he was a person (and not a hunter, to use Bobby's harsh metaphor from 7.09).

So therein lies their disconnect. And Sam isn't pushing this agenda just because he sees them havving their own lives, their own goals and interests, as a HEALTHY thing. No, Sam's still choosing that as a reaction, as "running away" from his life. They're nowhere CLOSE to figuring out how to balance their individual wants and needs and desires. They're still on the "all in or all out" mindset of extremes. Which drives so much of their interpersonal drama for the next few years...

DEAN: Wow. Back in business. Got the win. Admit it – feels good, huh? You know, I was thinking about what Randa said about, uh, you know, what it feels like to be a warrior. I get it, man, I do. SAM: I know. I know you do. I don't. Not anymore. Hell, maybe I never did. DEAN: Come on, Sam, don't ruin my buzz, would you? SAM: Dean, listen, when this is over – when we close up shop on Kevin and the tablet – I'm done. I mean that. DEAN: No, you don't. SAM: Dean, the year that I took off, I had something I've never had. A normal life. I mean, I got to see what that felt like. I want that. I had that.

This is Dean's idea of "normal." He understands this life. And Sam feels even more like it's something he's been dragged into against his will over and over again.

What he had was an illusion. I mean, it actually all did happen, but he sees it in this weird idealistic way in his memories, with too-bright lighting, the cinematic equivalent of rose colored glasses. Which we get to see from an outsider's perspective in...

8.04, Bitten.

The couple leaves and MICHAEL or BRIAN’s camera zooms in on SAM and DEAN.

SAM: All right. There is not a case here. DEAN: There is a case here. You're rusty. We just got to dig a little deeper. Come on. DEAN walks towards the IMPALA and after a moment SAM follows him. BRIAN: Dude, it's so crazy. MICHAEL: Is it just me or are you getting a workplace-romance vibe from those two?

>.>

I mean, Dean's right, Sam's rusty, but at least a little of it is the same thing he expressed in 8.03. He doesn't want to "waste time" on these minor cases when they still have the True Mission of finding Kevin, translating the demon tablet, and slamming the gates of Hell forever... which... yiiiikes.

Reminder to anyone who hasn't read everything I've ever written about s8 before, but I still see this as the one time the Winchesters ALMOST pulled something just as horrific as Cas letting all the souls out of Purgatory, but slammed on the brakes at the last second and saving things. Unfortunately Cas was manipulated (again!) by Metatron into doing the same thing to Heaven and dumping the angels onto the Earth. I mean... thank heck Dean didn't let Sam go through with THAT particular act of hubris, right? Because they really were in the wrong trying to mess with the natural order that badly in the first place. And honestly, EVERYTHING they did after that point was cleaning up the messes they ALL made here... including the Mark of Cain and the Darkness... they stumbled into those things from a place of guilt over all this other nonsense... and they're just now FINALLY getting back to the root cause of all of it in 14.20...

but back to this episode... or these four episodes I guess...

MICHAEL: The FBI is trying to kill me. KATE: Shut up! Everybody, shut up, okay? First things first, those guys – those guys aren't FBI, all right? I'm pretty sure that FBI agents don't say "awesome" that much. You know? And – and they definitely don't hunt and kill college kids. MICHAEL: Did – did they say anything else? BRIAN: Dude, they just sat and talked about how they have been apart for a year. You were probably right about that whole office-romance thing. MICHAEL: I'm screwed. I'm screwed. BRIAN: Kate, come on. What are we supposed to do? KATE: Okay, you know what? You guys, you're missing the big picture, okay? They – they don't know about you, Michael. They're looking for whoever, whatever bit you in the first place, the pureblood. That... that gives us some time... to figure it out, you know?

Even random strangers pick up on the creepy codependency vibes.

KATE: I didn't finish Brian's movie to justify what happened. To be totally honest, I'm not really even sure if I understand it at all. I just wanted you to know that – that Michael wasn't always a monster. None of us were. I'm leaving. And you'll never hear from me ever again. Look, I know that there's another way. I can eat animal hearts. [A tear rolls down her face.] I've never hurt anyone. Nobody human, anyway. I didn't choose this. Please... please give me a chance.

Which...

SAM: Look, Kate's right. She hasn't hurt anybody – well, anybody human at least. DEAN: Yeah, she didn't – she didn't choose this. Let's give her a shot. SAM: Seriously? DEAN: Yeah, yeah. SAM: And, look, if Kate pops back up, I mean, if she strays, then no questions asked. [He unplugs the hard drive and laptop on the desk and picks them up.] We do what we got to do and, um, we take her down.

Which is a very different result from such past episodes as 7.03 and 7.13. And hey, progress... At this point in the narrative, every little step into the grey area, away from the absolutes that still rule their lives, counts.

#spn 8.01 #spn 8.02 #spn 8.03 #spn 8.04 #s14 hellatus rewatch #it's spirals all the way down #spiders georg of the tnt loop #welcome back to the codependency arc... >.>#winchester family dynamics #sam sympathizes and dean empathizes #sam vs reality #that's what free will is #breaking the codependency #the scheherazade of supernatural

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