the way I love the ocean
Relationship: Robin Buckley x Female!Reader
Summary: It was the summer of ‘87. Nothing in your life had prepared you for Robin, but somehow everything had begun falling into place. It all started with a movie and a pair of ocean-blue eyes, and suddenly you were dancing to a Jukebox in a long-closed diner, or racing down the length of a pier, swimming in the moon-dipped lake and walking her home down yellow-lit streets, talking about the way The Smiths sound like indigo and the best time of the summer is when the fireflies start to come out.
It was the summer of ‘87, and you were falling in love.
Word Count: 7.3k
A/N: .........Hi. Okay so yes it's been six months I am so sorry for the wait. I will finish this fic, and the final chapter will not take another 6 months to get out, but I do still have to write it so bear with me <3
Thank you all for the support, I hope this chapter is at least a little worth the wait :]
Let me know if you’d like to be tagged for future chapters! (Only one more to go)
Fic Playlist! Also on Ao3
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Chapter 7: Here I Go Again
“I’m telling you guys, he just like… doesn’t listen to what I’m saying. It doesn’t matter what it is -- I could tell him I’m heading to college tomorrow, bags already packed, and he’d still be fucking disappointed.”
Steve was stacking shelves with half of his focus and ranting with the other, hand waving through the air with an occasional VHS to add to his point. You were leaning back against the counter of Family Video, resting between Robin’s legs. She had her arms wrapped around your shoulders in a loose but heavy grip, and her chin sat on one of her arms. Steve would have been complaining that she wasn’t working if he wasn’t still reeling from an argument he'd had with his dad.
“I’m sorry, Steve,” you said.
“Yeah,” Robin chimed in, reaching up to lay a hand on the top of your head, tilting it this way and that like a monkey inspecting a coconut. “Parents suck.”
“Parents fucking suck,” he insisted, shoving the last VHS tape into its spot on the shelf. “I can’t wait to move out.”
“Take me with you,” Robin pleaded. Your heart immediately fluttered at the thought of moving into your own little home with Robin and Steve.
“God, can you imagine,” you said, sliding your hands behind Robin’s knees and pulling her closer to you. “Actually having a place of our own…”
“Now hang on a minute, I said I can’t wait to move out -- who said anything about you bozos.”
“Steeeeeeve,” Robin whined, tilting her head so her cheek was smushed against your shoulder. She wrapped her arms further across your chest. “I thought we were best friends.”
“We are best friends -- that doesn’t mean I don’t need my own space.”
“So you can have a man cave,” she replied, voice rising an octave in that way that always meant she was making fun of him.
“Really, Robin? You just--”
“Hey guys,” a sudden familiar voice called along with the chime of the bell as the door opened and Eddie burst through. “I brought the kid.” He spun halfway, pointing a finger at a teenager who was trailing behind him.
“‘The kid.’ Really?” the boy deadpanned, giving Eddie an unamused look.
“Henderson!” Steve grinned, his mood immediately improving. He fidgeted like he was going to run over to him but instead leaned over the other side of the counter. Robin pulled her legs out of your grip to twist around.
“What am I, chop liver?” Eddie demanded, shooting him a wink when the other man rolled his eyes before going to poke him in the ribs.
“Hey,” Robin greeted the kid.
“Hey,” the kid, nodding his head at her, then his gaze quickly snapped to you peeking over her shoulder. “Holy shit,” he said with an endearing lisp. “Is this the…”
“Yep, this is my…”
“Hi,” you raised an awkward hand.
“Holy shit, hi!” he perked up, grinning from ear to ear. The corners of his mouth curled into dimples, the skin around his eyes crinkling with the intensity of his smile. The decision that you liked this kid was instantaneous.
He took a big step closer to the counter and reached a hand over it.
“I’m Dustin, it’s nice to finally meet you,” he shot Robin an intentional look, then glanced back at you. You ducked around Robin to take his hand, smirking when he gave it a firm, business-like shake.
“Nice to meet you too.”
“Why is this just now happening?” he demanded, glancing around the room.
Steve gave a vague shrug, Eddie smirked slyly as he leaned onto Steve’s shoulder, and Robin said, “We’ve just been a little busy, that’s all.”
“Uh-huh,” Dustin said around another smaller grin, eyes twinkling as he looked back at you. “Awesome.”
“Henderson quit staring, you creep.”
“Wha-- I’m not staring--” He dodged as Steve suddenly lunged around the counter for him. The older boy dropped a hand onto the top of Dustin’s baseball cap and gave him a friendly shove before ducking away from the kid’s elbows. Eddie was watching them with his arms crossed and a love-drunk grin on his face that you knew he probably would have denied with his life if anyone dared to bring it up.
“Oh my god, they’re adorable,” you whispered to Robin, turning to face her and draping your arms over her shoulders. Her eyelids fluttered half-closed as she smirked at you.
“You’re adorable.”
“Shut up,” you tucked your nose behind her ear, inhaling the familiar scent of her shampoo.
“Holy shit!” Dustin suddenly yelled, voice cracking. You lifted your head and Robin turned hers to find him staring at you. “You guys totally have to come skating with us on Friday.”
There was a chorus of “What? No,” “Skating, you guys are going skating?” and “I can’t skate -- I can barely even walk,” the last one belonging to the girl whose legs were wrapped around your hips.
“Come on,” Dustin groaned, obviously lacking the patience required to deal with any answer but ‘yes.’ “Guys, it’ll be so fun. El wants to go before they all head back to California, so that means it would actually be really rude to say no. Besides," he added, waving a hand at you. "She can meet the rest of the party there. You guys can't just keep her all to yourselves forever."
"Uh, last I checked she’s a free person," Robin said with mock pleasantness and her own eyebrow raised.
"Alright, fine," Dustin replied, somehow sounding like a parent who was ending an argument he knew he could win. You couldn't help but wonder who this kid was. He was kind of great. "But my argument still stands."
Then, horrifyingly, he looked to you, his lips curling into that adorable grin.
"So, you wanna come skating this weekend?"
"Uh," you hummed, glancing at Robin. She just stared back at you with what you thought might be an expression high on fondness. "Sure," you decided even though you weren't actually sure. "Why not?"
"Robin might fall and crack her big head open," Steve said in answer to your rhetorical question.
“Uh, for your information, I actually have an average-sized head, thank you very much.”
Eddie snorted.
“I mean, if that’s okay,” you ignored the theatrics you were more than used to by now and looked at Robin. You didn’t want to pressure her into anything, and you also didn’t want to just waltz yourself right into her friend group if she didn’t want you to.
But Robin smiled softly. Always soft, always sweet like springtime.
“If you’re game,” she shrugged. “I’m game. You’ll just have to keep me from cracking my perfectly average-sized head head open,” she hooked her arms around your waist with a smirk.
“Oh, you guys are so cute,” Dustin said, and you both turned around to find him grinning at you.
“Shut up, nerd,” Robin said even though she was smiling too. She reached over to give him a little shove to keep up appearances.
“So, six o’clock?” he looked expectantly around the room.
“Yeah, sure,” Steve grumbled, and everyone else nodded in agreement.
“Cool, cool…. So, I’m also gonna need a ride--”
“Oh, me too,” Robin raised a hand.
“Oh my god!”
______________________________________________________________
The roller rink in Hawkins was, in almost every way, about as fancy as you’d expect. It was almost always empty during weekdays and crowded during weekends when kids had off school and parents were looking for a way to get them out of the house. It was dark, the floor was cracked in a few places, and the roller skates were likely older than all of you combined. You were pretty sure your parents had used the same skates you were using now, and as you carried the worn leather back to an equally worn cushioned seat just outside the skating area, you half expected a wheel to pop off or something.
You’d arrived before the rest of the kids. You, Robin, and Dustin had all piled into Steve’s car earlier that evening. Dustin, taking the passenger seat, had ranted about the grade he’d gotten on his science project and how he was being “cheated for all I’m worth, Steve. Cheated.” Then he changed the tone by bragging about how well Suzie had done on her own project.
“Suzie?” you asked, wondering if she was one of the kids you’d be meeting tonight.
“Dustin’s girlfriend,” Robin teasingly provided.
“Yeah,” Dustin said, grinning dreamily. “She’s great. She lives in Utah, though, so we made this whole radio system to communicate. Way easier than using a phone, and this way we know no one can listen in on our conversations.”
“Ew,” Steve muttered.
“It’s not ‘ew,’ it’s romantic.”
“Sounds pretty ‘ew’ to me.”
“Oh, there it is,” Robin leaned between the seats to point at the turn in the road. “Pay attention, Steve.”
“I am, Jesus, would you sit back down?”
With a smirk, Robin flopped herself back into her seat. As Steve turned into the parking lot, Robin gave you a fond smile. It lit up her face like a spring morning, all sunshine and birdsong, and you felt something unbearably warm bloom between your ribs.
Clambering out of Steve's car, you’d all rushed inside to get your skates, Dustin leading the way like he owned the place and chatting with the employees eagerly -- even when they were less than eager to talk to him. Steve had rolled his eyes about five times since getting inside, but there was a constant spark in them. You were pretty sure he loved this kid, and you were also sure that it made sense. Steve, at his very core, was loving -- even when he was trying very hard not to be.
You and Robin had just sat down next to each other when a familiar puff of brown hair popped up in the crowd of pre-teens and parents who had already filled the building. When he caught sight of you, Eddie waved dramatically, and then he spun in a circle to herd a group of kids toward the front desk. Behind him, a large man in a floral shirt had his arm slung around a tiny woman in a beige jacket and following them was another group of kids.
“Jesus, you guys weren’t kidding. How many children does Steve know?”
Robin looked at you and grinned.
“Hey, oh my god!” Dustin called, hopping excitedly as two boys ran up to tackle him in a group hug. From the back of the crowd, another boy appeared and raced towards the pile, throwing his skinny arms around his friends. You watched them with a vague smile on your face.
What happened next was chaos. Between the crowd of strangers and the crowd of children, you felt like you were drowning in faces as Dustin, Robin, and Steve all tried to introduce you at different times to different people. But after only a few moments, the group seemed to realize that there was a newcomer among them.
“Everybody shut up!” Dustin shrilly yelled.
“Dustin, Jesus Christ,” a dark-haired boy muttered, face scrunched in annoyance.
“Okay,” Dustin said, ignoring him. “Everyone, this is Y/N. She’s Robin’s… friend. Y/N, this is Mike,” he pointed to the dark-haired boy, who gave you a grimace in place of a smile. “Lucas,” he pointed to the boy next to Mike, who smiled and nodded. “And Will.” Last in line, Will murmured a shy, “Nice to meet you.”
Then Dustin stretched up on his tip-toes to peer over the crowd. “Max! Eleven! Erica!”
“Jesus, would you stop yelling,” Mike insisted, and Lucas laughed to himself.
Three girls appeared out of the crowd, two of them looking like they were ready to kick someone’s ass.
“What the hell do you want, nerd,” the smallest of them snarked.
“I want to introduce you to someone, so could you be pleasant and or agreeable for once in your life? This is Y/N, she’s Robin’s friend.”
“Hi,” you offered, trying to seem as disarming as possible. “It’s nice to meet you.”
The girl narrowed her eyes at you. “Hi. I’m Erica,” she finally said, looking you up and down.
“Hello,” the girl next to her said in a soft but clear voice. “I’m El. It is nice to meet you,” she held out a hand, and you took it with a gentle shake. She seemed sweet.
“This is Max,” she said, tilting her shoulders to make room for a redhead who was eyeing you warily.
“You’re Robin’s friend?” Max said, and you got the sense that this was some sort of test.
“Yeah,” you replied simply, and the girl only nodded.
“Alright,” Steve clapped his hands together. “Now that that’s done, everybody get your skates before they run out. Come on, chop-chop everybody, let’s go!”
You watched as Steve slipped into what Robin had warned you was “Mom Mode” as he herded all the kids towards the back of the room to pick up their skates.
“Hi,” the small woman greeted you, stepping around the man in the colorful shirt. She smiled as she offered you her hand, and kindness radiated from every inch of her. “I’m Joyce, Will and El’s mom. It’s nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you, too,” you replied, instantly feeling comfortable.
“I know things can be a little crazy around here,” she glanced around the roller rink. “But you let me know if you need anything.”
“Thank you,” you said, feeling a bit of your mask chip away as you began to feel more at ease. Maybe meeting new people wasn’t as scary as you’d been led to believe your whole life. Maybe you’d just never met the right people.
“Should we get this show on the road?” Robin said, appearing close to your side.
“Let’s do it,” you murmured. “Just promise you won’t break any bones, okay?”
“‘Course not. You’re here to look after me, right?” she replied, voice sugar-sweet. All you could do was nod, your mouth opening uselessly. Robin shrugged as she backed towards the seat. “Then I’ll be fine.”
______________________________________________________________
“Keep your knees bent. Knees bent, Steve -- fucking Christ.”
“Shut up, Henderson,” Steve hollered back as best he could without toppling himself over. He looked like a baby deer on ice. You’d started calling him Bambi and he’d threatened to never drive you anywhere ever again. Robin laughed so hard she’d nearly fallen over, and you’d had to grab her under the armpits to stop her from hitting the deck. Then Steve laughed so hard he did fall over, and Dusin had to take several prolonged minutes to catch his breath and wipe the tears from his eyes when the whole ordeal was over.
You grinned as you passed Steve, who squinted his eyes at you in a way that suggested if he didn’t have wheels strapped to his feet, you’d be in a headlock right about now. It also probably helped that you were the main reason Robin wasn’t on her ass. In her words, “I’ve got about as much coordination as a newborn giraffe. Probably less.” She hadn’t let go of your hand since you’d entered the rink, her knuckles white and her palm sweaty. It was probably one of the few places, you realized, where the two of you could hold hands like this without getting odd looks. Plenty of people were helping each other stay upright -- it hardly mattered that you and Robin were touching.
It was nice. God, it was nice -- even when you were both sweaty, and the rink was crowded, and Robin looked like she was doing the monster mash trying to keep herself balanced. You giggled at the thought.
“What?” she managed to look at you without tripping over her own feet.
“You look adorable,” you murmured, leaning to bump your forehead on her shoulder because outright kissing her like you wanted to wouldn’t have gone down well.
“You look adorable,” she shot back, wrinkling her nose with a grin. “Also, how are you so good at this?”
You shrugged. “I’ve got good balance.”
Risking life and limb, Robin skated closer until she was nearly pressed against your side.
“My girlfriend’s multi-talented,” she whispered in your ear, wiggling her eyebrows when you looked up at her. You tried to keep yourself from burning up.
“I have to pee,” you suddenly said.
Robin looked at you for a moment, then glanced around. “I, uh, guess I should help you to the bathroom, right?”
“I mean… Peeing on wheels is dangerous business.”
Her eyes lit up with the realization followed by a mischievous smile, and then she was pulling you towards the rink’s exit, ignoring the other skaters as they dodged around you.
“Hey,” you heard a familiar voice call. You tilted your heels and spun around.
“Holy shit,” Robin muttered, grabbing onto your arm in alarm -- as if she’d be able to hold you up. No, the gesture was more like a commitment to going down with you.
“So what, you guys’re just gonna leave me?” Steve yelled, and then his arms flew up as the effort of yelling nearly knocked him on his ass for the dozenth time that night.
“Bathroom,” you yelled back, pointing towards the door in the corner of the large room. “Besides, Dustin’s taking great care of you.”
“Finally,” the kid announced. “Some of the respect I deserve. I like her,” he turned to Steve. “She’s way better than you.”
“Oh, oh really, okay,” Steve muttered, pulling a face before dodging sideways and trying to push Dustin over. The younger boy yelled, but he was grinning. You smiled after them, and when you turned to find Robin again, she was watching you, something soft and distinctly happy on her face.
“So, uh… bathroom?” you murmured.
“Oh, uh… yes. Bathroom,” she replied.
It was more of an ordeal than you’d expected, getting inside the small room without being dismembered by the sink or beheaded by the stall doors. The slight slope in the floor was enough to make you unsteady, and Robin, her cheeks flushed red, looked like she was seriously considering the possibilities of an afterlife. But you managed, mostly by holding onto each other in a death grip. You were surprised neither of you had lost an eye by the time you determined that the bathroom was empty.
And as soon as you did that, you found your back against the wall. Robin was holding onto the sink -- the only reason she’d been able to push you backward -- and she was smiling at your lips. With eyes half-lidded and breath coming in short puffs that moved the strands of her frizzy hair, she leaned forward and kissed you. Her lips were hot and soft, and they tasted like the chapstick you kept in your work apron. You hummed, wrapping an arm around her neck.
“I,” she said, ducking back slightly. You opened your eyes to look into her soft blue ones. “I probably smell really bad right now. Like, a serious B.O. situation going on--”
You laughed, quickly shaking your head.
“No, no -- you just… you smell like you. Good,” you clarified. “You smell good…” Inching your nose into her hair, you managed to convince her.
“I’m so glad you exist,” she whispered against your cheek. “And that you’re, like, a goddess on skates, because otherwise I’m pretty sure I’d be dead by now.”
“Oof,” you winced, leaning back enough that you could smile, but not so far that your noses couldn’t touch. “‘A goddess?’ I don’t know…”
“I do. It’s definitely hot.”
You breathed out a small laugh, glancing at your feet, at the way Robin’s leg had braced against your thigh. You didn’t know what to say, so you lifted your hands to the waistband of her shorts, letting them play with the belt loops before sliding your fingers gently up her waist.
Eyes wandering slowly across your face, she’d just opened her mouth when there was a sudden noise from outside the bathroom. Pushing off of you, Robin spun in a circle like a rabbit caught in a trap. Acting on instinct, you reached out and caught her with one hand while flipping on the sink with the other -- just in time for Joyce to round the corner.
“Take it easy,” you said. “If the floor gets wet, we’re gonna have even bigger problems…” Laughing anxiously, you nodded toward the soap dispenser.
“Oh… oh right,” realization flitted across her face and she reached around you to stick her hands under the stream of water. She was still unsteady, though, and you grabbed her waist with both hands, this time just to steady her. Turning over your shoulder, you glanced at Joyce.
“You both are braver than me,” she said, smirking kindly. “Could never get me on a pair of those things. Not anymore…”
You smiled, the panic rushing out of your body.
“Yeah, it’s… an acquired skill,” you managed.
“I haven’t acquired it,” Robin added, and then she stiffened as she almost lost her balance again. Your hold on her waist kept her from falling.
“Well, it seems like you’re both doing great,” Joyce said, smiling again before ducking into a stall. You let out a breath as you turned to glance at Robin. Nothing was said, but you both could see it in each other’s eyes, how close of a call that had been. Even though Joyce seemed nice, you didn’t want to take any chances. At the very least, you didn’t want to have to try and explain what you and Robin had between each other to anyone else. It was yours, and you wanted to keep it that way.
“Ready?” you breathed, hand sliding around to the small of her back -- more of a comforting gesture than anything. Maybe for her, maybe for you.
“Yeah,” she nodded, grabbing your hand. She gave it a squeeze and a little shake, and it made your insides feel just as good as when she kissed you. Everything Robin did made you feel loved.
Which even included having to hold her tall frame up as you both wobbled your way out of the bathroom.
“We're lucky no one’s lost an eye,” she said.
“I was just thinking that,” you laughed and held her hand tighter.
“Heya,” a voice droned past you, and you looked up in time to see Eddie spin on his wheels and coast backward, two cans of soda in hand. “How’s it going, nerds?”
“This is what happens when he hangs out with Erica. He gets even more annoying than usual,” Robin explained, leaning into you so she didn’t have to yell over the music and clatter of skates.
“Ouch?” Eddie announced, clutching a hand to his chest.
“We’re good,” you said, ignoring Robin with a smirk. “Well, we almost died in the bathroom, but other than that.”
“Oh, the bathroom, eh? And of course, you needed a partner for that perilous journey…”
“Exactly.”
“Didn’t you hear the part about us almost dying?” Robin said, wobbling again. “If it wasn’t for her I’m pretty sure you’d have to wheel me out on a gurney.”
“Uh-huh,” Eddie squinted, but then he lifted his hands and shrugged. “As long as you’re being safe.”
“Shut up,” you grinned, rolling your eyes.
A smile tugged at Eddie’s lips, and then he was whipping around and hooking his arm over your shoulder, holding the opened soda can up and out of the way enough that, when a few splashes escaped, they landed on the floor and not on you as he pulled you into him a planted a kiss on your cheek.
“Take care of our girl, hot wheels,” he said, and then he was coasting away, lifting a can in parting without even looking back.
“He’s such a dork.” Robin announced.
“He’s a total sweetheart,” you replied. She looked over at you, then smiled.
“Whaddya say, hot wheels. Should we hit the floor?”
“Well, let’s not hit it too hard.”
Robin’s face scrunched with a grin and she nuzzled her adorably wrinkled nose into your ear before tugging you toward the rink.
______________________________________________________________
“So, do you like, skate a lot?”
“Well, not a lot. I used to, when I was younger, but not as much anymore.”
“You’re pretty good at it.”
“Thanks,” you smiled softly.
The redhead -- Max, you were pretty sure her name was -- had reluctantly worked her way over to you. Robin was in your line of sight, waving occasionally from the center where she and Steve were skating in smaller circles. Erica was with them, coaching them better than any gym teacher you’d ever seen and, even though they both made sure to very loudly voice their complaints, it was actually helping. Steve hadn’t fallen for a solid ten minutes now, and Robin was finally looking less like a falling tree. You thought maybe Erica seemed proud -- when she was sure neither Robin nor Steve was looking.
You’d stayed on the outside, coasting leisurely while watching the people skating around you. In the crowd, you recognized friends and strangers alike, and people that fell somewhere between the two. You’d thought the kid had maybe been watching you, but you weren’t sure until she came racing by, hitting the brakes moments before sailing past you. Her first few sentences had been awkward -- stilted, like she hadn’t really decided that she wanted to do this but was doing it anyway. You tried to seem casual enough that she wouldn’t feel weird about it and found yourself letting out a breath when she relaxed into easy conversation.
“You definitely seem to know what you’re doing,” you said. “Do you skate a lot?”
“I skateboard.”
“Oh, cool!” you grinned. “I don’t think I’d be very good.”
“It just takes practice. I was pretty shit at it when I first started,” she shrugged. Then, very hesitantly. “I don’t know, you seem pretty average on wheels. It probably wouldn’t take you long to pick it up.”
“Do you skate at that bank in the park?”
“Yeah,” another hesitation. She glanced at you. “I could teach you sometime if you wanted. I mean, I’m not a teacher or anything,” she added in a rush, icing out her fluster with indifference. “But I could show you the basics or whatever.”
“Really?” you grinned wider. “Yeah, okay. Cool.”
“Cool,” Max nodded. Then, with an almost surprised glance in your direction, she skated off, catching up with Lucas, who gave her a mock shove in the shoulder. She grabbed his shoulders and pretended to shake him before he ducked out of her grip. Someone grabbed onto your shoulder. You turned around and Robin was there.
“Holy shit, that was exceptional. She, like, has this whole thing going on where she likes to seem all tough and it makes her pretend she doesn’t like anyone even when she does.”
“I like her,” you said. Robin smiled.
“Me too. She--”
“Robin!” Steve yelled from across the room, voice raising in both volume and octave as he flailed toward you.
She took a breath to yell something back -- probably “What are you yelling for so loud, dingus, can’t you use your inside voice” -- when Steve, half hunched over in a desperate attempt to not fall, pointed frantically toward the ceiling.
Robin’s eyebrows furrowed. “What--”
“Robin,” you gasped, grabbing her arm.
“Would someone kindly tell me what on Earth is-- Oh my god!”
“ABBA!” Steve yelled.
“ABBA,” she yelled back, grabbing your arm as Mamma Mia blared over the speakers.
“You can’t not dance to ABBA, but I might genuinely die so hold onto me, okay?”
You laughed, readjusting your grip on her enough that she didn’t faceplant as she began to wiggle around.
“Mamma Mia,” she sang, spinning around so she could face you head-on. You gripped her hands tightly.
“Here I go again--”
“Woah, careful!”
“My, my, how can I resist you.”
“Mamma Mia,” Steve joined, coasting by -- nearly crashing into the wall.
“Does it show again, just how much I missed you.” Steve circled behind you as the two of them sang. You couldn’t stop smiling if you tried.
“Jesus Christ,” Eddie muttered as he slowly skated by. “This is truly a sad sight to see.”
Very slyly, you shot him a look. Then, throwing an arm around Robin’s shoulder, you sang nearly as loud as her and Steve.
“Yes, I've been brokenhearted. Blue since the day we parted. Why, why did I ever let you go?”
“Not you too.”
You just kept on singing, much to the delight of Steve, who seemed to be especially enjoying Eddie’s misery at the choice of music.
“It’s a roller rink, man,” Steve argued, shrugging. He’d gotten pretty decent on the skates, much to Eddie’s dismay. Less ammo. “They’re gonna play disco music.”
“Whatever. Just focus on not breaking your neck, okay Harrington.”
"Oh my god, do you think they'll play Dancing Queen?" he asked Robin.
"Eds, I can see the vein in your forehead popping."
"New girl, I need less of that and more--" he pulled a thinking face "--ehhh, emotional support. That's it." He hooked an arm around your neck. Robin had grabbed your hand. You hadn't noticed until now -- wondered if anyone else had. Didn't care.
It surprised you, but it felt good. Your insides felt all indigo and warm air and flowers woven into a crown. The lights blinked in a meadow across the floor. You rested your hand on Eddie's arm and squeezed Robin's with the other.
"I love you," Robin whispered, leaning closer.
"Insufferable," Eddie said with a big roll of his eyes and a little tug of your shoulders.
"Can you guys not hang off each other for like, five whole minutes?" a now familiar voice appeared just a moment before Dustin skated into view.
"You know what, Henderson?" Eddie pushed off of you and slid over to grab Dustin by the shoulders. "I've always been impressed by how much gall you can pack into such a tiny body."
"Ha ha."
“Seriously, though, how do you not explode?”
“Hey.” Robin’s voice was close. You took a moment before you looked at her, shivering at the feeling of her words and the memory of her lips. Then you turned, buckling under the weight that she held in your mind -- entirely too much; perfectly enough.
“Hey,” you replied, hushed, with a shy smile that you didn’t even think to control. Probably couldn’t, when it came to her.
“You okay?” she asked.
“Yeah,” you said. Then, “Well, almost.” You were getting tired, and your social battery had run out a while ago, and--
“It’s, like, really loud,” Robin said like she already knew everything you could ever tell her. Like she knew all the right ways to make it better.
“Yeah,” you whispered, smiling.
“You wanna get out of here?” she said -- dragged the words out slowly, glancing around, ocean blue eyes scanning the room before landing back on you. Always on you.
How were you this lucky to be the one that she came back to?
“Yeah,” you whispered, face aching.
Robin was steadier than she’d been the entire night as she led you toward the carpet. Everyone else around you was a blur, blending into yellow and blue streaks of sound and light and all that was inconsequential. And in your hand, Robin’s had grown warm. And somehow that didn’t matter because all the people around you were just as inconsequential as the blur. Your hips brushed hers as you untied your laces with quietly hasty fingers. And that warmth that had been in your hand came radiating off of Robin’s body. You didn’t even need to lean into it, it permeated your whole atmosphere.
The world felt so much smaller as you followed Robin to the booth at the back of the rink. The world felt just the right size. You left your skates on the counter, feeling unsteady now on your own two feet. But then Robin was there, always there, and her fingers were intertwining with yours, and you looked up at her and you knew without uncertainty that wherever you went in this life, however unsteady your feet grew, she’d always be there, and you’d always have just enough strength to find your way to her.
The two of you had the whole world.
And yet, it was sitting on a dumpster behind a run-down roller rink in nowhere Hawkins where you watched a sunset that felt too substantial to possibly be found anywhere else.
“I like your friends.” You broke the silence that had started with “You want to get out of here?” and lasted long enough to watch the yellow sun bleed down into orange, and then pink, and then purple. The sky was indigo now. It felt like home draped over your heads -- like the world had made this millions of years ago just for you where you were now. Like it had been waiting all this time for you to find it. A million and nineteen-something years.
“Oh.” Robin broke her own silence with a sigh. And with that, you were together -- a million and nineteen-something years in the making. “I’m glad,” she said. “I was irrationally afraid that you’d, like, totally hate them, or find out that they’re completely crazy and then decide you want to bail, or… something.” She chuckled nervously, her eyes finding yours, still reflecting the last bits of the sky’s color.
The sunsets always lasted longer in Robin’s eyes.
“There’s nothing,” you said like it was a full answer. Maybe it was. “There’s nothing that could ever make me want to bail, or… anything.”
You watched the tides of Robin’s eyes shift as she watched you -- ocean spray turning to dark waves and blue depths. And it was the same as the sound of crickets, far off from where you were now, away in the forest that had first held the two of you close, and it was the same as the buzz of the pavement settling under the indigo sky that held you now. Everywhere you went, there was something that knit you together. Here, outside a roller rink in nowhere Hawkins that was bursting at the seams with warmth and life and love, it was your lips.
She didn’t always kiss you slowly, but when she did, it was often under the light of a sunset, or the beams of the moon, or the glow of pool lights settled just below the water. And when she did, you found it ineluctable in you to not reach forward and feel the reflections that had settled on her cheeks. She could make any sharp light soft. She made the roughness of your fingers feel alive and ancient until her freckles and your fingerprints became one and the same.
“I’m glad you’re alive,” you said, eyelashes brushing her cheek. Robin smiled.
“Right back at you, Earth girl,” she murmured. Reaching onto your lap, she sought out your hand and hooked your pinkies together.
You took a deep breath. It was filled with the smell of asphalt and dirt and the berry shampoo in Robin’s hair. Pulling one leg up onto the dumpster and crossing it under the other, you leaned toward Robin until your temple rested on her shoulder. The sky was glowing, and the air smelled like summer. It felt like the whole world belonged to you -- like no one else was here. Like nothing else mattered beyond the connection between your pinkies.
“‘M I interrupting something?”
Neither of you panicked at the familiar voice. Instead, you turned to find Eddie walking into the orbit of your world, his hands stuffed in his pockets and a soft smile on his face.
“Don’t you usually,” Robin answered, lacking malice.
“Hi, Eds,” you said because it felt right.
“Mind if I sit?”
Robin shook her head a second before you did. Eddie hopped up next to her.
“A dumpster. Romantic.”
“Said the guy who brought Steve that old sweatshirt like a cat dropping a dead bird on a porch.”
“Hey. That sweatshirt is a piece of Metallica history, Buckley, and you’ll show it some respect.”
“You’re such a dingus, dingus.”
“Yeah, yeah, tell me about it.”
The three of you sat in silence. Eddie knocked his knee against Robin’s. She knocked hers back.
“Hey,” Steve rounded the corner. “What the hell are you guys doing, I’ve been looking for you for like twenty minutes,” he said, lacking malice. Almost soft.
“Just admiring the sunset from this dumpster,” Eddie announced.
“Looks to me like you’re third-wheeling, Munson.”
“What? Never.”
“Yeah, I, uh… think we’re pretty far beyond third wheeling in this relationship, Steve,” Robin said. “Or even fourth wheeling.”
“We’re a package deal,” Eddie added. “Like collectibles.”
“Collectables,” Steve narrowed his eyes. “Yeah, okay sure. Well, when you guys are done being weird, I’m ready to go.”
Eddie raised an eyebrow indignantly before hauling himself to his feet and sauntering over to Steve.
“Don’t you have some infants to put to bed, Harrington?”
Steve pretended to bat him away before letting Eddie settle an arm around his neck.
“No. They do have parents, in case you missed that.” Everyone knew that it didn’t really matter. Steve looked after them like they were his own. Always would. “Anyway, they’re all spending the night at Byers’ place as a going away party or something.”
“Well then,” Eddie pulled him closer. “Looks like we have Mama Steve all to ourselves.”
Robin blew some hair out of her face and clapped loudly. Grinning, you hid your face in her shoulder and kicked your legs.
“Whatever, just don’t expect me to cook your dinner or do your laundry,” Steve muttered. Eddie shot forward to offer you and Robin each of his hands as you jumped off the dumpster.
“Don’t you do that anyway?” Robin asked, crinkling her nose.
“We love you, Steve,” you said, walking over to him -- he’d slowed down to let the three of you catch up -- and bumped your shoulder into his.
“Yeah, I don’t wanna hear it,” he said, but you could hear the way he was fighting a smirk, and when he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, you knew that the sentiment had been returned.
As the four of you made your way to Steve’s car, Robin skipped forward and grabbed your hand, lacing your fingers together. From the other side of the parking lot, the kids were all piling into Joyce and Hopper’s car.
“There’s no way that’s safe,” she commented.
“Clown car for sure,” Eddie said, taking a few exaggerated, floppy steps and honking an imaginary nose.”
“You’re the clown,” Steve muttered.
Bathed in a dark blue glow like the backdrop on a stage, someone reached above the car and waved. Dustin, maybe. Probably Dustin.
The four of you waved back.
Robin didn’t let go of your hand.
______________________________________________________________
No one was in the mood for swimming, but no one wanted to be inside either. Steve passed out a round of beers and then never got up to get any more. Unprompted, he said that his parents were supposed to be coming back in a few weeks.
“Summer’s almost over,” he said, staring at the can in his lap. Little droplets of perspiration clung to his fingertips, slid down the dark, shiny aluminum. “Still, I thought they’d be away longer.” He shrugged lamely. “There’s still time.”
"It'll probably be weird, not being the only one living here again, huh?" Robin murmured. You leaned your cheek onto her thigh. The skin was soft and warm, and every breath you took smelled like Robin, chlorine, and the sweet summer night air.
Steve looked up and glanced at Eddie, then at the two of you sitting across from him.
“Haven’t really felt like I was the only one living here, though,” he said with another shrug, like he was trying to shut the conversation down before it got too far.
All three of you knew what he meant. You didn’t need to say anything to know that you were thinking the same thing. Eddie and Robin and you, you’d all spent as much time here as you could -- almost as much time as Steve. There had been countless nights where he and Eddie had shared a bed, or all four of you had fallen asleep in a pile in the living room; nights where you and Robin had camped out on Steve’s bedroom floor, feeling like you were kids again having a sleepover, gossiping about what you were going to do during summer break or what you wanted to be when you grew up.
But now you were grown up. High school was over forever; you all worked jobs, none of you had the aspirations nor the money for college, and you had no idea what lie for you beyond Hawkins. Sometimes you wondered if you even wanted to find out. Somehow you felt like no matter what you did, you’d always be a failure. In a lot of ways, you still felt like a kid sleeping on the floor of a friend’s bedroom with no worries bigger than what you were going to buy back-to-school shopping with your mom or which teachers you were going to get.
You wished you could pretend that the summer nights on Steve’s floor would last forever like you used to when you were a kid. Nights that glowed softly with streetlamps from outside open windows and warm breezes and the sound of crickets had always felt like, if you squinted just enough, focused your mind just enough, they would never end. You’d always been able to convince yourself that you could freeze them right then and there and nothing would change. A perpetual summer of sleeping on a friend’s bedroom floor. But things had changed, and you’d gotten older, and now the world expected something from you. Something you didn’t feel ready to give. Something none of you felt ready to give.
The world hadn’t given any of you a chance to be kids. Now, when it wanted you to be adults, you had no idea what to do. You were sinking.
“I wish we could stay like this forever,” you whispered, picking at the fabric of your pants. They were a pair of Steve’s flannels. Somehow, none of you had thought to start keeping a change of clothes at his house, despite how long this had been going on. Or maybe you had thought of it, and the thought had been ignored. “I wish we could always be together like this.”
The four of you taking on the world felt so much more bearable than facing it all by yourself.
“Then… fuck it." Eddie's voice joined the night. "Why don’t we?” All three of you looked at him and, after a moment, he looked back. “Yeah. I mean, fuck it. We’re already failures, if you ask any respectable resident of Hawkins--” he pulled a face. “So, why shouldn’t we stick together? What’s stopping us?”
You felt Robin’s hand slide down your neck to the center of your shoulder blades. Her palm was warm, and her leg where your cheek was pressed was warm.
“I mean,” Steve started, staring at the concrete but really looking somewhere far beyond it. “It’s not like I’ve got anything to lose besides you guys and a bunch of rugrats. King Steve is six feet under and turning fucking blue.”
“Yeah,” Robin said. You could feel her voice through her fingertips. “I never had much of a reputation anyway.”
In the silence, you all realized what was happening. A sort of pact made next to a glowing, mirror-surface pool, under a sky of dark indigo. Your only witnesses were the crickets and the stars and the echoing of a suburban neighborhood while everyone else was asleep.
And nothing else was said about it, about Eddie’s fuck it or Steve’s I don’t have anything to lose besides you guys, but the silence allowed all four of you to understand, almost suddenly, that nights like these didn’t have to stop. Not for Steve’s parents, not for anybody.
“Rent will be cheaper with four people,” Steve said, almost as an afterthought.
And that was that.
______________________________________________________________
Taglist: @alonezz , @gaysludge, @gray-cheese, @rare-breed-of-human, @vea-vea-vea, @lady-silkwing, @im-a-milf, @yourmanifestingbigsister, @bubbles0oo, @wormm-mom
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