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brawltogethernow · 4 years

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Raven, Starfire, and Robin, swords-and-sorcery AU?

The visitors were bright smears of color even in the oppressive bright whiteness that flattened the cave’s palette. They didn’t look like the kind of people who usually came to appeal to her at all.

The man was slight and dressed like a performing troupe’s idea of a humble yet flashy wandering hero - if such a person were backed by a noble’s purse. Mostly green, a shade that could disappear in the forest, but just enough pops of red and yellow to say, fuck you, if I blend in it’s because I want to. A half-cape hid his silhouette but not his short sword, and a half-helm hid his eyes but not his sharp smirk.

The woman was easily a head taller than her companion, and wore armor like it was for decoration: Bits and pieces at a high polish were dotted unstrategically over screaming purple traveling clothes. And not berry purple, or magic purple like Raven’s cloak could be if she wanted. Expensive purple, like royalty wore. It would look foolishly vulnerable if not for the obvious power in her stance - and if not for how when they had entered the searing light of the cave she had lowered the glowing fist she’d been holding up to light their way. That about explained it.

The tall one spoke first: “You are the sorceress Raven?” She didn’t exactly have an accent, but she placed her words very carefully. Like stones in a rock garden.

“I don’t do love potions, cursebreaking, or quests,” drawled Raven in her most unwelcoming monotone, hoping they’d take the hint. It wasn’t a robust hope. She didn’t move from where she was floating cross-legged in the center of the bright space. “I don’t take mercenary jobs, hand out prophecies, or undo transformations. Get out.”

They did not get out. The man actually stepped forward like she’d invited them in. His gait looked almost fae, but he didn’t feel fae. She considered giving him a good ogle with her magic, but she couldn’t do that without a visual cue, and she didn’t want to look invested.

When he’d halved the distance between them, he asked, “Not even one quest?” He spoke like he was the only person in the world in on the punchline of an amazing joke.

“I’m busy.”

The woman squinted at her. She had eyes like emeralds - literally her entire eyes. Even the sclerae were poison green. “You do not look busy.”

“I’m booked solid.” The truth was, she had come here because the crystal caves were supposed to be places of clarity. Except even here Raven had hit a wall getting herself into order. And that was before the rumors started that there was a ~magician~ in the ~magic cave~ who might do people favors.

But she didn’t have any better alternatives. So.

“We really need a mage,” said the light-footed man.

Raven jerked her chin at the purple woman. “You have a mage.”

He looked confused for a moment before understanding lit. “Oh, Star’s not a sorceress. She’s just...not from around here.”

That was...interesting. “Look, I’m not the only sorceress in the kingdom. Find somebody else.”

He drummed his fingers on the hilt of his sword, more fidgety than threatening. His companion eyed Raven from what was clearly a flanking position. She gave the impression that if anybody made a move on her armed, athletic companion, she would rip their head off before he got a chance to show off. “We could do that,” he said eventually. “But you’re supposed to be pretty good. And if we settle for less than pretty good, everybody...is going to die.”

“Wooooow,” said Raven. “Drama.”

“There is much drama,” confirmed the woman with apparent sincerity, nodding earnestly. Kind of robbing the wind from her sarcasm’s sails. “Robin is always most dramatic!”

The man turned a slightly offended look on her.

Raven mulled the declaration over. “How...everybody is...‘everybody’.”

Robin tipped his chin down to fix her with the impression of a serious stare, eyes still unseen. “Everybody.”

Yeah, the other one absolutely had him pegged.

Raven debated. If this wasn’t nonsense it was probably still safer for everyone if she stayed in the cave.

The woman clasped her hands together. “We can promise you many riches!” she said. “The queen has promised a reward. Many accolades, and dances and feasts and--”

“Books,” interrupted her friend. “Magic books. Forbidden ones.”

That...could help her, maybe. More than a bunch of rocks.

She let herself sink to the floor. Then, slowly, she drew her influence into herself, bleeding it from the natural crystals that were supposed to grant this place empathetic resonance. The harsh white aura of the space dimmed until it was just a pretty cave.

“I’m listening,” she said.

“Brilliance!” cheered Star, less care, wrong word, and then she rushed forward and picked Raven up.

“This is not going to be a touching kind of partnership,” she growled, struggling from the sudden confines of an excessively friendly hug. Externally (put me down!) and internally (do not melt the nice warrior’s brain).

Star pouted, but put her down. Robin had one hand over the exposed part of his face and was half turned away from them. If his shoulders started shaking, she actually was going to melt some brains.

[naturally, upon receiving the books, raven realizes she doesn’t need them because the key to emotional stability was the friends we made along the way (and a healthy dose of adventure).

On AO3.]

#DCU #teen titans #starfire #dick grayson #robstar #does tt raven have a tag??? does this trio have a tag??????#fic #w #one two three four GO #today's vibe is writing 'half a head' and then deleting 'half' bc i have priorities #askbox meme #onwardmotley #asks answered

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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youtube

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

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sebastianshaw · 4 years

Conversation

RP meme from "Chapter Four: Aspects and Renown" in The World of Darkness Ratkin Breedbook

"What you can actually do is far more important."

"The experience is little more than a challenging contract to prove one’s mettle."

"Not everyone can stand so much isolation and seclusion."

"Along the way, they work whatever scams and schemes they can to survive."

"After all, mavericks are known just as much for their quick wits as their stealth and subterfuge."

"Some do this to escape lives they cannot stand; others quest for ideals they may never achieve."

"If there’s a great place nearby to find food, adventure, or perils that threaten the young, a wise scout or spy will find them quickly."

"Relationships on the road are temporary and superficial."

" A scout or wanderer who hasn’t seen an old friend or lover in years immediately picks up the relationship exactly where it left off."

"Each year, they move from city to city, use and discard temp jobs like old clothes, and evolve a series of personas for different situations."

"Not all of them are impoverished and homeless; as long as you know where to find crash space, you’re never really helpless."

"They are fascinated by places inhabited by other creatures, especially humans."

"Some are smart enough to emulate the people they live near; others come up with bizarre explanations to explain human activity."

"Instead of a straightforward military report on the strength of predators in the area, the data must be condensed into a format even a small child could understand."

"When problems with the physical world grow too great, it’s tempting to just vanish into the ephemeral realms for a while."

"These alternate identities aren’t very flashy, just the sort of quiet identity that no one questions."

"It can also draw attention from police officers, irate merchants, and hostile humans."

"This isn’t my world. I just hide in it. If you’re looking for a place to run, talk to me."

"This isn’t my world. I just hide in it."

"If you’re looking for a place to run, talk to me."

"Seers are the keepers of ancient secrets."

"A human is still a human, and can never be trusted."

"Just because they’re victims doesn’t mean they’re virtuous; they’ll still rip you off when you least expect it."

"They seek wisdom the human race has discarded or left behind."

"They make their lairs in areas where the police fear to go, where the only law in both physical and spirit worlds is survival."

"Her body remains in the physical world; her spirit watches what transpires around it in the spirit world."

"You worry about fighting what you can see. I’ll worry about fighting what you can’t see."

"If they feel strongly enough, they will enforce their beliefs as they best see fit."

"Unfortunately, when passing judgment on their own kind, they have restraints placed on their activities."

"These harsh practices have millennia of precedent."

"They reason that it’s better to have a few small, secure ratholes to hide your equipment and yourself than to go to the trouble of defending a larger turf."

"Many secretly enjoy “pronouncing sentence” on anyone who offends them thoroughly enough."

" Justice is far more important. . . and unfortunately, far more subjective."

"Most know they can’t change the world by openly practicing violence; if anything, they’ve got to be really secretive about their revenge."

"Epic carnage is best left to less sophisticated creatures."

"The threat of one of the local politicians getting killed is usually enough to dissuade them from disagreeing any further."

"They do not disguise themselves when pursuing an assassination, as they will not apologize for what they do best."

"We had a contract. You broke it. Now I’m going to make your life a living hell."

"When rage flows freely, violence reigns."

"Some have the wisdom to choose their battles carefully; others don’t care who dies when battle lust seizes them."

"Peace is nothing more than a temporary cessation of the ways of war."

"Developing martial skill involves far more than just killing things — sometimes it involves crippling them, weakening them, or demoralizing them.

"These soldiers don’t just slay; they also use their knowledge of chaos to confuse their enemies, striking in the night when madness reigns."

"All of them pride themselves on discipline and composure. . . until rage overwhelms reason."

"Warriors of both sexes are mildly insecure, and feel the need to show off their martial prowess."

"What? Just because you’ve got an army surplus jacket and a pipe bomb, that makes you a man?"

"Any fool can pull a trigger."

"Saving the world requires true warriors."

"Technology isn’t evil, after all. It’s just in the wrong paws."

"Many are convinced that if they don’t watch their actions carefully, someone from a local laboratory will capture them and experiment on them to find out why they’re so smart."

"Wherever technology thrives, these rats will move in to scavenge it."

"Humans have a fetish about continually acquiring more stuff, newer stuff and cutting-edge state-of-the-art tech."

"The struggle begins with fierce discussions about technological innovations, and rapidly breaks down into name calling and slander."

"Two machines enter; one machine leaves."

"Whether they tinker with ancient computers or rusting cars, they have an insatiable need to fix anything that’s considered unsalvageable."

"Sometimes, she’ll spend the whole day collecting knickknacks just to see what she can build out of them that evening."

"Genius has its price."

"Each one has a physiological trait that identifies him as the gene freak he is."

"Dark powers tutor them in forgotten arts of destruction."

"He’ll be deposed by forces he’s summoned up, but can’t put down."

"Turn your head and cough. Oooh! I’ve never seen it that color before."

"Not all of them are swashbuckling heroes, but all of them are delusional about their origins and their heroic prowess."

"The conflict of egos can become so intense that bystanders get hurt from the fallout."

"Dueling etiquette demands satisfaction."

"Anyone who hears this tale will swear that it is true."

"My good sir, adventure is my middle name!"

"What? You don't believe me?"

"Keep her pointed in the right direction, and she’ll masterfully eliminate your enemies."

"If you’re not careful, she’ll blow up right in your face."

"Any place populated by the desperate, frustrated or down-and-out is another good choice — not only does it make for a good place to hide, but it has its share of potential allies seeking vengeance. . . or potential victims at which to vent your anger."

"They’ll need a really powerful common enemy to unite them; otherwise, each will suspect the other of conspiracy."

"Many come from criminal backgrounds, broken homes, abject poverty or the sort of banal borderline existence that breeds cynicism and contempt for just about everyone."

"Each one has a surprising degree of truth to it."

"It controls all forces of order."

"The balance of the world will not be restored until we destroy everything that smells of stasis, stability or the status quo."

"Hey, nobody saw me do anything. Besides, he had it coming. . . he pissed me off. What? You talking to me? You talking to me?"

"Hey, nobody saw me do anything. Besides, he had it coming. . . he pissed me off."

"Hey, nobody saw me do anything."

"Besides, he had it coming. . . he pissed me off."

"What? You talking to me? You talking to me?"

"You want a piece of me?"

"Chant the creed, kid, and learn. . ."

"I shall seek revenge against those who prey upon my kind."

"I will survive so that I may breed."

"I must respect strength and exploit weakness."

"I shall grow stronger through conflict."

"I will learn from the mysteries of the spirit world."

"I will revel in the visions the spirits grant me."

"I shall nurture, instruct and aid the young."

"I will trust my own kind before I trust outsiders."

"When someone is responsible for injustice, I will make sure someone pays."

"Legality is a subjective concept at best."

"Fighting to survive is difficult enough."

"What else could heal the world?"

"They’re doomed to self-destruct."

"The day that the buildings come crashing down, I’ll dance in the streets."

"Survival comes first."

"Mankind’s days are numbered."

"The strong breed. The weak die. Does that sound harsh? That’s evolution."

"Instinct will tell you when to kill, so follow it."

"We need an army to overwhelm our enemies."

"I still do not know if this is wise."

"If only the strong breed, then you must prove your strength before you can reproduce."

"Don’t be some addle-witted wharf rat who breeds with any half-dead body in the sewers. You, soldier, are the paragon of your race."

"Such egotism!"

"That is nature's way."

"That is nature’s way. If the population of creatures in any one area is too high, a few can be killed or a great number will starve."

“Property is relative. If I can take it, it’s mine. If you can’t defend it, you don’t deserve to have it."

"They buy far more than they need, go to great lengths to defend what they have, and insist that they have the right to determine who owns what."

"If you own more than you can carry, you’re wasting what others can use."

"Betray others before you betray your own kind."

"We’re running into the world together, kid, so we’ve got

to stick together. You ready to go? Um. . . you first. . .”

"You ready to go? Um. . . you first. . .”

"We’re running into the world together, kid, so we’ve got

to stick together."

"I just feel this rage in my blood that’s been there since the dawn of time. And I just feel like acting on it."

"Show me your true face, and it’s my call whether I want to slash it off."

#rp memes #rp meme #rp starters #roleplay meme #roleplay memes #roleplay starters #ratkin #world of darkness #werewolf the apocalypse #out of shirt #okay to reblog #will answer in morning

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jamiedc-they-them · 4 years

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The time you have (Platonic)

IMAGINE: Carol and you got along instantly, ever since you entered this world after her. She had always taken that for granted. Now, she would be forced to find her way without you. Even if that adjustment wouldn’t be permanent.

Carol Danvers and you were said to be best friends from day one. You both apparently just got along from the get-go. She was older, by like a few years.

According to your parents, neither of you seemed too pissed by that timing. She liked being the older one. Gave her more responsibility, she could teach you things and what not. For you, you had someone who could help you when needed. Someone who could act like a guiding light to you. Give you a hand in the dark.

You were best friends. Mistaken so many times for a couple (that led to a lot of awkward moments. More importantly, it lead to you vomiting in the toilet after. Carol would never admit it to you, but she sometimes found herself feeling like doing that at the mere idea of it.)

You met Maria, her best friend. She became a close one of yours. You had both had a want to fly. To get up there in the air. Feel the rush of it all. To others, it was peculiar, you were less outgoing than she was. You were also a lot less teased than she was.

“What you both have. Never take it for granted.” Those were the words Maria said to you both when she saw how deep your sibling bond was with each other.

You did what you could on those terms. Backing her up and defending her. Sometimes that led to a few fights. You could handle yourself. But your friends still helped out. They would really only step in if you were about to get your arse kicked. Or if someone was about to try and sneak up on you.

Your sister and practically second sister couldn’t have that happen to you. They would defend you too. You became a trio. An unstoppable force.

Until that one flight happened. The one where everything changed for you both.

When you both left this planet and found what lied beyond the stars. Finding something else out there. Finding Kree and what not. Finding SHIELD and Nick Fury. Finding a whole new part to yourselves.

Yon-Rogg let you both have the information that you were siblings. He wasn’t all cruel. Although, part of him still feared what that would do for your emotions. How, now that you had that bond, how far it would go. How far either would go for the other.

Try as he may, putting you on different squads. Putting you on different assignments, you’d both still met each other when you could. When you were sure no one was looking, Carol (or just Vers, then) would let herself feel. Despite others telling her not to do that.

She’d let herself feel her pride on your accomplishments. Let herself feel the sisterly love she felt for you.

You never fully “flipped the switch”. You never fully turned them off. You were just better at hiding them. Rogg knew what you were doing. But, in his credit, he didn’t call you out on it. Just gave you a look every so often that would tell you he knew what you were doing.

It didn’t stop you, though.

“Hey.” Carol found you one night, starring out your window. The soft hue of the outside world creating a nice light in the room. With the night sky making it look like some artwork or something. You’d both had this drive for the rush. But you’d also had a more creative outlook as well.

She admired that about you. How you were able to do that. Find the beauty in the dull.

You gave her a timid smile but returned your gaze outside. She came beside you. You had just returned from your latest mission. One that had gone not great. You made it back though, that mattered. That was all that mattered.

“Yon said I was worrying too much today.” She admitted. She always seemed to be able to just let her guard down around you. The walls she had built would just crumble when it was you both alone.

You didn’t give a response. That made her look at you, seeing your eyes still looking out. But she then noticed that you weren’t really there. You were somewhere else. The glazed look in your eyes.

She waved her hand in front of you. Nothing. Clicked her fingers. Still nothing.

She looked around, fuck it.

She channelled her power, holding it out in front of your face now. That got a reaction from you.

You blinked a few times, before you leaned back. She chuckled at the leaning part. It managed to hide the slight worry that had started to build up before.

“Where’d you go?” She asked in a slightly teasing voice. The smile that accompanied it faded a little when you looked at her with a slight amount of fear. You were trying to kill it. To drown it out. But it was coming through.

“(y/n), what is it?” She let everything go. Her walls of stone, crumbled in a moment all because your look was unsettling. How you weren’t at peace.

“I saw….Something. I don’t know…… It……” She only waited, giving you all the time, you needed to fully get your thoughts together. All so she could then find a way to help you out.

As if her mind wasn’t already piling ideas up.

“We were different….I can’t really explain it. I – I don’t know. But….” You didn’t want to say this part. Not really for you, but more for your sister.

“….I was – I was dying.”

Carol did not answer, she did not move. She was frozen. Her eyes even widened a little. You looked at her for a moment, before you dropped your gaze fully to the floor. A little embarrassed. Why? You never really decided. You narrowed it down to either because you had to admit that you were dying, or just the sheer weight of it.

Actually, looking back, those two were pretty much the same thing.

Carol was wanting to deny her feelings. That was what Yon said would work. How a warrior would be. She could make an exception here.

She wasn’t a warrior in this moment. She was your elder sister. One who was terrified for you.

She brought you into a tight hug. One you returned. Both squeezing the life out of one another. Your hugs always where nice. They always felt warm and loving.

It was one of the things she missed most about you.

You had both gone through your adventure on earth. Been reunited with Maria, both saved the world. Both sworn to return if needed.

You wouldn’t get that chance.

“Danvers?” Steve questioned. Moments ago, she was rearing to go and find Thanos, avenge the earth. He saw the look in her eye, though. The look that gave away the fact that this was personal. That this meant something to her.

Him and the remaining avengers found the titan. Thor brought his axe down; the mad Titan’s head was gone the next moment.

But nothing was better. In fact, if anything, it was much worse.

They had to sit with it.

Or, more importantly, she had to sit with it. She had to sit with the fact that she was alone now. That it was just her now carrying the Danvers name.

The fact that she had lost her little (brother/sister).

All because of that fucking arsehole.

“(y/n)?” She asked as she saw your gaze become fearful once again. She hadn’t seen that since the day that was now well in the past. She always kept it in the back of her head, though. The look disturbed her. Your words disturbed her. You were dying. That was what you said. She couldn’t let that happen.

“Carol – I….It –“ She watched as you stumbled through your words. How you couldn’t even finish a sentence. How, whenever you got close to doing that, you’d just stop and have to start all over again.

Part of her knew. Part of her knew what you were trying to convey. Part of her knew what you meant. Part of her knew that this was that moment you were talking about all that time ago.

Part of her still denied it.

You stumbled. You stumbled, that was what confirmed it. It was only for a moment. The stumble was only a littlie one. A slight stumble. But a stumble none the less.

For Carol, it meant that she could no longer deny what was about to happen. Even though she had always (secretly) braced for it. For the moment and situation where you would go first, she had tried to prepare herself for it.

As you both knew well, there as preparation for an event; then there was the event itself.

Carol stabilized you as your knees buckled, she tried to keep her emotions at bay. Tried to keep them from spilling out. Even now, she still tried to hide them away. With everyone else she could. She’d be able to put that mask up. To hide it all away.

You weren’t everyone else. You were her (brother/sister). Her best friend who she had sworn to protect from when she first saw you in the hospital room. From when she first got to hold you and you opened your eyes to look at her. She knew she had to protect you.

Now, she could only hold you and lower you down to the floor as the pain you felt grew and grew.

“No, no, no, no. No. No…” Her voice cracked as the hand she held of yours started to slip away. Started to fade away.

“Carol…”

“I’ve got you. I’ve got you, (y/n).” She knew her promise was hollow. That it was just empty words. A few moments later, those words fully lost all value. As you fully faded to nothing but dust. The wind on your current planet sweeping you away.

“NO!” She cried out, trying to hold onto at least a small amount. Any amount that could still be classed as you. Something to hold onto.

She didn’t get that. She only grabbed air.

The next five years seemed like a blur. She was doing what she could for others. Trying to aid them in anyway she could. She was. The only issue was that was only one of the reason she was doing it.

She was also doing it for you. To keep your legacy alive. Doing this, it made her feel like you were there. That you were both still together again. Some days, she could have sworn that you were there, laughing at some joke.

Those were only memories. Fading memories. Her memories. She was scared to admit that. That those memories were fading. That she was beginning to forget what your voice was like exactly. How some memories started to blur together.

Days became months. She was just hopping from one system to the next. Steve had reached out to her. Telling her that she could use a rest, that she could come to therapy with her. She always declined.

That would be fully admitting that you were gone. That would be giving up. That would be losing.

Carol and (y/n) Danvers did not lose. They weren’t going to start now. She wouldn’t let that happen.

So, she continued on her path across the galaxies. Finding people to help. Sometimes, there would be a family who were separated; she would help them get reunited. She would smile at them and tell them that it was no problem. Internally, that wasn’t true. It hurt.

Was she glad she could help them? Definitely, she wouldn’t dare say she wasn’t. That would be lying. Did she miss you? The answer was always the same. The desperation for all this to be a dream grew each and every time.

Carol Danvers was always capable of things on her own. This was proving that fact. She could, however, of used your help. It would’ve helped remind her she still had you. She still had her best friend at her side to help her. To encourage her.

She had to rely on her own mind to do that. The mind that was busy swirling with thoughts about how she had let you down. How she was alone now. She tried to suppress them. Tried to lock the away. For some time, she had succeeded. She had managed to lock them away. The positive ones appearing. Thoughts telling her that she was honouring you by doing this. Thoughts that told her she was doing the right thing still.

That was when she heard it. She got the distress call from earth.

This was it, to her. This was the moment your passing would be made worth it. She could fully honour you by brining the mad Titan down. By making him feel the pain she felt as she held you and watched you turn into nothing.

She flew through the ship, the thing detonated upon her impact. She held a passive but pissed look on her face. This was your home. This was the home that you both shared. Not a house, but a planet. A home planet to always come to when needed.

She might have been late. But she was more than willing to go the extra mile to make sure that they won.

She liked Peter, both for his own reasons. Mainly his (probably accidental) comedic timing. Moreover, he remined her of you in a small way. It helped the smirk on her face as she asked him for the gauntlet.

The next moment, she was surrounded by others. Other warriors. Nobel warrior heroes. That was finally true.

She managed to do her part against Thanos. Manged to hold him at bay for a short while. That was before he grabbed the stone and slammed it into her.

She slammed against a van, falling over.

She heard the footsteps of your killer. Those steps then went silent. Then a crash. Then she heard the faint hum of power.

Looking up, her eyes widened when she saw you. You, stood in front of her, fist clenched.

“Who are you?” The titan asked, tone chillingly casual. He wanted your name, to know who he was about to kill.

“I think you know.” You finally turned to your elder sister, holding out a hand. She took, you hauled her up. Tears pooled her vision as she realised that you were back. That you were alive.

You looked to Stark next, giving the man a nod. He returned it. Before you both moved to another part of the fight.

It was like you never left. It was like that emptiness she had felt in herself was never there at all. You were by her see once again. Fighting together like you always had.

She felt the blast heat up a little behind her. Turning, she saw a creature fall. She turned to you, seeing a teasing smile on your face, “Getting rusty, I see?”

She rolled her eyes, but the warmth in them didn’t leave. She had missed this. The quips you’d both share. The way you could find the positive in anything. The light amongst the dark.

“Behind you!” She warned, even you weren’t fast enough. You were knocked to the ground. It was off you the next moment, she lowered a hand to you. This time pulling you up.

“Thanks.” She nodded. Like hell was she going to lose you again. She had realised an error in her ways. Mainly taking your time together for granted. Don’t get her wrong, she loved what you both did. Just, she always knew you’d be there. Even if she had prepared it. She saw and felt for herself that it would never help.

“No one hurts my little (brother/sister) and gets away with it.”

She was going to now make every day and second with you count.

#Carol Danvers #carol danvers x reader #Captain Marvel #captain marvel x reader #captain marvel imagine #marvel imagine #carol danvers imagine #mcu imagine #platonic imagine

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c-is-for-circinate · 5 years

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---okay wait, no, nevermind, this is what I want to say about Vex and Percy, I found it after all. I love them because they’re a love story about choosing what you want to build after the world falls down around you, and finding somebody else who will look to the future and build next to you, even though you’re both working with shattered landscapes and cracked tools. I love them because the way both of their worlds broke is so fucking different, but they understand each other enough to recognize it, and neither one of them can keep from moving instinctively, unstoppably forward anyway.

Once upon a time, they both had lives with plans, and then those lives fell apart. And both of those lives, those sets of plans included love in their own way, but neither of them looked anything like the love Percy and Vex found with each other. They didn’t expect that at all.

I have a lot of feelings about teenaged Percival de Rolo, who is probably going to be a clockmaker. He has so many siblings in his vast noble family that he can do that, he can be semi-useless and artful. He expects to get married someday, a respectable arranged match to someone he’ll presumably like well enough, and live a quiet, clever life. I picture him as fond enough of his family, assuming that he’ll be fond enough of his hypothetical maybe-someday wife and his hypothetical maybe-someday children, happy enough in that partnership, with the time and space to be passionate about his cleverness and his books and his inventions. There’s such a specific kind of fulfilment in that life I think Percy once envisioned for himself, with people who are reliably there, loved but taken a little bit for granted, all of the focus and elation and ‘this is the point of me’ devotion towards intellectual pursuits. I think he would have been happy with that life, and that he would have been kind of a vaguely-inoffensive asshole because he never really paid enough attention to other people to bother really hurting them, or to learn that he could really hurt them and stop.

Of course we know how all of that fell apart. What I’m fascinated by is Percy himself, though, Percy who survived to join Vox Machina, because the Percy we know from canon never actually stopped falling apart. We know he hasn’t rebuilt himself a new life, he doesn’t have a future, he’s got a revenge quest and then he has a dragon distraction, sure, yes, we see that, but it’s not just the facts of what Percy does, it’s the feelings and the headspace he’s in the whole time. Taliesin’s said a few times, and I am so interested in the implications, that Percy spends 95% of the campaign mostly staying coherent through the middle of a constant, years-long nervous breakdown. He is constantly slipping back and forth along the edges of dissociating, present enough to react to things but not exactly here, not really processing the full weight of everything that happens, not quite. He can’t tell his Orthax-visions apart from nightmares cooked up by his own brain, and he talks more than once about how much the past few years with VM feel more like a dream than reality. His judgment is a mess, diving headfirst into deals with anyone who’ll have him, making whatever bad decision seems like a good idea at the time.

So Percy’s life was smashed to smithereens and the Percy we know has absolutely not recovered, has not even really begun to recover--but one of the really epic things about Percy is the way he just keeps moving forward anyway. Dazed, dissociated, acting on instinct, whatever Percy may be, it is baked into his very nature to keep on going. When Percy is surprised or threatened, he always seems to be shocked into action, not stillness. We see it when he goes full Determinator in Whitestone during the Briarwoods arc, and again chasing Ripley to Glintshore. We see it directly after the Chroma Conclave attack, looking for a plan, for a next step, when he tugs Vex to evacuate the keep; we see it in the ruins of Draconia when he’s the only one to notice Tiberius, and he is so careful about asking questions that won’t derail the thing they have in motion, so careful not to alert any of the others who might grind everything to a halt, because grief or no grief this has to keep going anyway. Even when he’s awash with useless emotions and there’s nowhere to go to, Percy broods at work, down by a forge or setting pen to paper, making and planning and doing. It’s so telling that even at his absolute worst, in that pit of nothing when Orthax first whispered in his ear, Percy’s reaction was to make something.

Which brings us to Vex, who isn’t quite a maker like Percy, but is still a builder in her own way. Vex who had her own life that fell apart, and I don’t really mean Byroden, and I certainly don’t mean Syngorn.

Vex’s life, Vex’s plans, weren’t handed to her. The life Vex expected to live was the one she was still living when we first met her: the traveling adventurer’s life she’d built with Vax. (And maybe that’s our first demonstration of exactly how much Vex is maker and a builder, that after her life fell to pieces the first time--after Byroden, after Syngorn--she’d already managed to put together a new one once.) She has her brother and she has her bear, and by the time we meet her she has Vox Machina, and it’s not much for convention but it’s a life. All of her expectations are locked into that life and that future. VM at level 9, with a keep under construction and the respect of Tal’dorei, was obviously already pretty different than the twins at level 1 living in the woods, but it’s also so easy to see how it’s just a continuation of the same thing. Vex and her twin live in each others’ pockets, and she shoots things and makes sure that there is always enough to eat and always money for a rainy day, and there’s stability in unconditional love and self-sufficiency right there. Laura’s mentioned on Talks that, if the Conclave hadn’t attacked and Vax had left the group, Vex would have tried as hard as possible to convince him to stay, and then would’ve gone with him for sure. Of course she would have. Vox Machina was the life Vex was trying to build, but Vax and Trinket were the life she already had, cornerstone and truth.

You can see how hard Vex works to create and maintain and secure that life with every coin she squirrels away so zealously against a rainy day. There is no doubt in my mind that, pre-Vox Machina, Vex and her bow and her hoarded pennies was the one who made sure there was always something to eat over the campfire every night. There is no doubt in my mind that when they found Byroden in ashes, Vex was the one who got her brother moving, who kept them moving, who kept them pointed forwards no matter what. And you can see how much Vex put into the bigger, richer, theoretically more-stable life Vox Machina was starting to build together when it all came crashing down.

Percy’s life fell apart pre-stream, and we all know exactly how. The super fascinating thing about Vex’s arc is that we get to see her life fall apart, right there in the middle of the story, maybe more than anybody else. The Chroma Conclave was hard on everyone for all sorts of reasons, but in terms of what Vex tried to build for herself and tried to keep, it’s easy to see how fast and how utterly she loses very nearly everything. Greyskull Keep is first, of course, with the heartbreak of watching Vex hesitating there at the edge of the tree with tears in her eyes, because this was their home. It’s such a big thing for her, more than for anyone else--and of course it is, because Vex more than anyone in the group saw Greyskull as her future. Keyleth always had the Ashari to go back to, and Pike had Sarenrae, Grog lives in the motion and Scanlan avoids plans, Percy could barely conceive of a future existing and Vax was lost and floundering for any next step he could find, but Vex had this castle and Vex called this castle home.

Of course it doesn’t end with the castle, though, because this love story is the story of how everything breaks, and the next thing of Vex’s to break was Vax. Before the dragons came, Vax was already falling apart and falling away from her in two different directions, half of him tugged away by depression and uncertainty, the other half pulled after Keyleth. The seeds of distance were sprouting there even before Vex died in the Queen’s champion’s tomb. And maybe that feels even more symbolic now than I ever realized it did before--Vex died and came back, but the deal her brother made, that vow he swore, wiped away any chance Vex still had for ever getting back that wandering rogue-and-ranger life that once was hers.

The Chroma Conclave arc takes nearly half of Campaign 1, and Vex spends it watching bits of her old life crumble while she’s much, much too busy to process or mourn. There are dragons in the world, and there’s no time to worry about what the world will look like once they’re dead. She doesn’t have plans. Vax has raven wings and a goddess and a girlfriend, and Emon is on fire, is turning to lava beneath Thordak’s feet, and Keyleth is a wreck and Grog dies for five minutes and god only knows what’s going on in Scanlan’s head ever--and Vex, like Percy, just keeps going. She reads the Raven Queen book cover to cover seventeen times. She takes things, and she hoards things, and she scrounges for loot, and she gets called greedy for it but the thing is that for Vex, acquiring things is very much a fundamental kind of building for the future, maybe even more than making and tinkering is for Percy. Stocking up now will save them later, it’s baked into the firmament of Vex’s soul, take whatever you can because you will NEED IT someday. She steals a broom because she wants it, yes, and then it saves all of their lives. She sets the group after Fenthras because she wants it. She bargains and she haggles, even when there’s no reason at all to believe that tomorrow will come, even when Vex has no idea what tomorrow could be, because whatever doubts she may have on the surface, her instincts can’t give up that last breath of faith: I will need this money later, because there will be a later. Just like Percy, scribbling plans in his journals late in the night for inventions he has no time or supplies to make. Neither of them have any fucking clue what the future could possibly be, but they can’t stop working towards it anyway.

This is the environment where they fall into each other, Vex and Percy, in the middle of the mess of the Chroma Conclave, in this violent limbo world where any day could be the last and next month might as well not exist. This is where they plant the seeds and start to grow the future they don’t even believe in yet.

The attraction and the flirting start before the dragons even come, of course. Percy builds things for Vex to have and keep and use or squirrel away, and it’s such a perfect expression of both of their attitudes towards the world. Vex keeps his coin with hers, and makes sure to shepherd it just as carefully, makes sure that Percy will have enough in whatever future comes. And there are hints of what they’ll be. There’s a reason that ‘Darling, take the mask off’ is SO MUCH, and it’s because ever-moving determinator Percy is stuck. He’s driving himself right into a corner, working himself off a cliff. He’s just killed someone horribly and he’s on the edge of blue-screening right now, of stopping, or maybe of smashing everything until there’s nowhere left to go. And Vex, who’s got a good life for herself right now but has already lost one and knows what it’s like, says, come on. Let’s back you away from this wall you’ve thrown yourself up against. Take the mask off. Let’s keep moving forward.

And they’re something, there, in the way Vex not only keeps going but tries to keep Percy going right through it all. So much of Vex’s constant planning and motion is wrapped around and embedded with keeping other people going too. We know she took care of Vax when it was just the two of them, because they took care of each other, and you cannot tell me Vex wasn’t the long-term planner of the pair. She gathers Trinket up out of horror and sadness and makes sure he has a future. She collects strays, angel slave-boys, the fruitless quest for the Gray Render baby. She pulls Percy out of a jail cell and keeps him in the first place. And there’s a selfless generosity to it, of course, or it’s easy to see one anyway, Vex who mothers, Vex who checks in on everybody else after her own death, but that’s not the whole story. The other half of it is Vex-who’s-never-been-alone. Vex who hoards people as tightly and as carefully as she hoards coin. She can keep going through nearly anything, so long as her people are there with her, so she is going to make sure that everyone she loves stays okay because she needs them to be.

The thing about Percy is that--because he’s a builder, a maker, a fixer, a determinator in his own right--he can return that favor. He can make sure that Vex keeps going, not by stopping and sitting in her feelings with her until she’s ready to move (which is very much the Vax and Keyleth energy), but by tugging her along in the direction she was already going. In Syngorn he gives her Whitestone, and oh, it’s a way to shut her father up, but more than anything it’s a someday. There in the city that helped destroy Vex’s first good life, while the dragon that burned the rest of it to ashes sits over the ruins of her last, Percy makes a promise that someday Vex can have a home and a future again. It’s far away and shrouded in mist. Percy can’t even really picture his own someday right now. They might both die before they get there. But there’s a someday ahead, and it’s enough to get Vex moving again, proud and hopeful and ready to go and collect that bow that’ll help get her there.

And Vex turns right back around again on Glintshore and in its aftermath, demanding that Percy have that future too, because she doesn’t want this one without him. If he’s going to promise her a someday to move towards again, then he damn well has to get there too. It’s because she wants him to be alive and happy, and it’s because Vex just wants him, needs him in her life, this human she collected and is so determined to keep.

So the promise of someday, in Whitestone is glittering on the horizon for them when they kiss in the woods after the Vorugal fight, and it’s just barely around the corner past the next couple of hells when Percy comes to her room before Thordak, but I think it also still feels like a far-away mirage, and I think that matters. They are both still lost in a world full of carnage and dragons and constant threat. Percy is stabbing Raishan in a council meeting because why the fuck not, this seems like a good idea at this time. Vex is still so unsure, trying to teach herself to forgive, trying to see a path forward to that someday-horizon, trying to deal with the fact that even if they kill all the dragons and even if they all survive she’s lost her brother to Keyleth and fate. The world is a wreck and they are a wreck in it, and the only thing they can do is not stop. The only thing they can be sure of is right here, right now.

So that’s where they fall into bed. On the eve of the Thordak fight, knowing they both could die tomorrow, knowing they most likely will. They’re about to go take on the monster that destroyed the only two homes Vex ever loved, a decade and a half apart, and there is no kind of promise that either of them will see the other side of the war, and that’s where they grab each other and hold on. They’re here in this impossible place together. They’ll take it as it comes, they’ll take whatever comes, and for this one night they have each other in it.

And then they survive.

So much of the episodes directly after the end of the Conclave--the next week or two in Vox Machina’s life, where they save Scanlan and try to bury some ashes and rip themselves apart, and then fight a kraken and die trying, and then go to Hell, and then come back--is just this string of, okay, nobody here knows how to stop. The dragons are dead, but the fugue state of violence and getting-the-next-thing-done, nose to the grindstone and figure this next step out and don’t worry about long-term plans because we might not survive to see them anyway, that’s still here. Percy’s been living there for years (and certainly didn’t have time, post-Briarwoods arc, to start thinking about pulling himself out of it). Vex’s specific life plans got trashed by the dragons more than anyone else’s. But really, the whole group is living there in one way or another. It’s just that Scanlan shattered under it and ran, and Grog’s never really suffered from it or lived differently anyway, and Pike keeps taking breaks to fix temples and tend to refugees and work towards rebuilding right through it all. Keyleth and Vax both found a sort of peace in fatalism and destiny, in knowing that they have set paths there in front of them and all they have to do is choose to follow them.

Percy and Vex, very fundamentally, don’t have those set paths. Nothing for them is a given. There’s Whitestone, yes, but there is a reason Percy isn’t Lord of Whitestone, king in his castle, leading his city through the dragons and beyond. When Percy’s life broke it shattered, and even when Whitestone was freed, he didn’t claim it as his. He only came back after the dragon attack because Emon was gone and it was the only safe place they knew. Whitestone is in Percy’s bones, part of how he defines himself and his life, but living there, running it, tying himself to the city--it isn’t a given. Percy could die fighting dragons or die to a kraken or spend eternity trapped in the Nine Hells, and Whitestone would be fine. He could leave and never come back, and Whitestone would be fine.

So coming back to Whitestone--sending Vex on the Gray Hunt--fucking in the castle treasury and setting up plans for whatever’s next--it’s a choice. Nothing about the people Percy and Vex become during peacetime is about destiny. They had lives and plans and destinies, the rich asshole clockmaker, the ranger on the road. Those are gone. Everything they keep from those old lives is a little broken, a little twisted from what they once expected it to be. Everything they do now is what they decide to build.

And this is the glory of Percy and Vex, the love that’s so big it makes my heart ache: the thing they decide to keep in this new world is each other. In the fugue of war with no future, they found each other and built things together, spent an entire evening tinkering on Vex’s stolen broom in Percy’s workshop, flirted and fucked and kept each other going even when nobody knew where. Neither of them had real, passionate romantic love written into their plans, back when they had plans. Neither of them needed it, not for the lives they wanted. But those lives are dead and gone, and they found this thing together in the weird wilderness between there and here, and they’re keeping it. They get to do that. They get to build their new lives in whatever shape they want, and that means they get to set each other as cornerstones and build everything else around them.

It’s so fundamental to this relationship and this new future that all the building blocks they’re working with, on both sides, are a little bit broken. Whitestone itself is still a struggling, recovering city sitting on a decimated continent. Percy is still so caught up in his own anger, still waiting for another shoe to drop, still not quite ready to believe any of this is real. Vex is pouring through libraries researching Orcus, researching Vecna, waiting for old debts to be called in. They are neither of them fixed. They are neither of them safe.

But we get to see, in one-year timeskip, how tentatively and tenaciously they keep working together towards something anyway. Vex builds a house and a Gray Hunt corps and a tentative detente with her father, starting to pick up those old pieces, starting to try. Percy builds civic works projects and an international early warning system, still ready for the next disaster, starting to entertain the idea that it doesn’t have to destroy everything. They get new glasses and open a bakery and invest in armor and ammo and art. They host a ball.

They get married, in secret, and tell almost nobody they know. It’s such an asshole thing to do! They are both still assholes, both still broken enough to be wary of the consequences of inviting their own loved ones to a simple wedding. They do it because the point isn’t the moment, it’s the marriage, all the future days to come in this new life they’ve agreed they are going to create together. They want it to be theirs, just theirs, this relationship they never expected to have and now intend to base the rest of their lives on. It’s kind of a messy, slightly dickish way to go about things, and that’s perfect, because Vex and Percy are kind of messy, slightly dickish people, and they own that together. They own a lot of things together now.

The epilogue of Campaign 1 walks the line between open-ended and closed story in a way I find so deeply satisfying, and so much of that is because of Percy and Vex.

So many stories end at a point where--the day is saved, or it appears to be, and the horizon is wide open for the heroes and the sunset, and everything is triumphant and victorious and anything could happen next. It’s perfectly satisfying and ripe for sequels, and nothing is quite guaranteed but everybody is happy for now and that’s a good place to tie things up anyway. It’s the ending of Return of the Jedi, or the first Pacific Rim--something has to happen next, somebody has to figure out what that is, but that’s not the heroes’ problem and that’s not the worry for today.

Sometimes, stories end with everything so tightly wrapped up that there’s no room to breathe. It’s the ending that says, what you’ve just read or watched or gone through is the entire story. It is everything that matters. It is full, and it is complete, and nothing that ever happens in the rest of these characters’ lives will ever be as important as what they’ve just done. Lord of the Rings does this a bit, and it actually works; Harry Potter does it badly, and I’d submit that The Adventure Zone: Balance does too. It’s the implication behind every Disney or fairytale happily ever after, although those at least tend to skip the epilogue describing exactly what that happily-ever-after means.

Vex and Percy do neither of these things at the end of their story, or they do both of them, and that’s so great. They do get the epilogue, with the closed ending and the happily-ever-after. The Lord and Lady de Rolo settle down, have at least five children, and live in peace for decades until Percy eventually dies of old age and Vex far-more-eventually follows. Their friends outlive them by decades or centuries. It’s tidy and nice and final...except. Whitestone could outlive even Keyleth, and Percy--and by extension now Vex, too--lives as long as Whitestone lives.

Somehow Percy and Vex manage to have an epilogue with every one of the trappings of a perfect picture-book ending, without feeling static. They’re going to have the house and the kids and the castle and the tiny little kingdom, and it’s going to be full every single day, because inherent in the very makeup of these two people is the inability to ever stop growing. With the dragons dead, with Vecna gone, they can keep doing exactly what they’ve been doing this entire time. They can move forward. They can build. And they can build something massive that outlasts both of them, lay foundations and groundwork for centuries and generations to come.

Fighting with Vox Machina will always have been the biggest, hardest, most glorious and dangerous, most epic thing that Vex and Percy have ever done, and it’s absolutely over. The book is done, tied off with a bow. But they’re not stuck and they’re not empty without it. They’re going to make clock towers and festivals and change the whole culture of Whitestone. They’re going to have half a dozen children and raise them towards their future. The Whitestone of fifty, sixty, seventy years from the end of the campaign when Percy eventually dies will be fundamentally different from the Whitestone they came home to when their adventures ended, and it will be the pair of them who made it so, together. Which means that even without him Vex will still have him, in civil infrastructure and all the things that let people keep living their lives, in this thing they created as a team, this thing she’ll continue to shepherd and grow without him for the rest of her own life.

And maybe that’s the key to Vex and Percy, to why their ending feels so satisfying, so inevitable and perfect and good. So many stories end before their characters can change and split away from each other. So many epilogues decree that their characters will never change, ever, so they can never grow apart. But Percy and Vex are built of growth and motion, and when they found a match for themselves in each other they decided to point that forward momentum in the same direction and change together for the rest of their lives. It’s what a real relationship looks like, a real happily-ever-after. They will pick each other up and help each other on along the way, because we’ve seen it happen. They’ll hold on to each other, and they’ll build.

#critical role #perc'ahlia #LOOK I JUST HAVE ALL THE VEX AND PERCY FEELINGS OKAY #THIS ISN'T EVEN ALL OF THEM #it's just a whole bunch #sometimes I just ship things #and then this happens

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reflectionsonredemption · 3 years

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Embracing the Gift of Loneliness

Loneliness is painful. It’s discouraging. It’s humiliating at times. It’s not a “gift” ... Or at least, it doesn’t feel that way.

In my college years, I was given this gift a few more times than I would’ve preferred. This blog post has been about a long time in the making; I wanted to write on what I’ve learned about loneliness in the beginning of freshman year when I found myself overwhelmed with loneliness, and am just now sitting down to compose my reflections. As a result, I’m no longer in a season of life in which I regularly find myself lonely, but am able now write with the perspective of appreciating the growth that was brought about by that involuntary season of solitude.

Loneliness has the ability to feel overwhelmingly consuming. That’s because at the root of loneliness is fear- a crippling fear of isolation. Of being alone with only ourselves and Jesus. Of having to acknowledge our deepest and strongest emotions, the ones that we distract ourselves from by surrounding ourselves with people. Busyness and distractions and other people keep us on the go, keep our minds off of real and hard feelings that creep in when we are isolated.

Here’s one of the biggest breakthroughs I had regarding loneliness:

Being alone is not the same as being lonely.

In fact, the wisest people that I know are the ones who are not afraid of being alone, who know how to do solitude well. I say “well” because there are several unhealthy habits I know I tend to gravitate towards in isolation. Loneliness becomes dangerous when...

1. We base our decisions off of FOMO.

Obviously, we shouldn’t make life decisions based on the fear of missing out. But when we are already feeling self-conscious or desperate in our loneliness, we’re likely not being intentional with who we are committing our time and emotions to - we are just looking to feel desired.

2. We run away from feelings hard feelings.

This attempt to ignore and distract ourselves from hard feelings can take on many different forms: eating, drinking, social media, filling silent moments with music, TV or other noise, and more. It’s uncomfortable to deal with hard feelings, and many of us don’t. Instead of distracting yourself from the sting of loneliness or other hard feelings, allow yourself to feel them. Cry out to the Lord with what is truly on your heart. I promise He will meet you there. Though it will be more painful at first, allowing Him into those deep and painful feelings is the only way to bring about actual healing in the long run, instead of simply numbing or ignoring the pain.

3. We retreat into our minds and don’t let anyone into the hyper-reality that is often created by dwelling on negative thought patterns.

It’s hard, especially in seasons of loneliness, to combat the desire to focus inward and think negatively about yourself. Naturally, we may have thoughts such as, “What is wrong with me?” “Why am I not desirable as a friend or romantic partner?” It’s tough to feel that way. It truly is. Again, take those thoughts to the Lord and ask for the confidence found only in Him. Understand that He may be giving you this season BECAUSE He loves you, and not to punish you.

Loneliness Can Be Purposeful

Loneliness for me was God’s way of making me aware of the fact that people and their attention had become an idol in my heart. By stripping me of that attention, I was suddenly acutely aware of my fear of rejection and the lack of depth in my relationship with Jesus. It was easy to say “All I have is Christ” in times of comfort when I was surrounded by friends. It wasn’t as easy when I didn’t have those friends to fall back on.

I remember some Friday nights in college, where it seemed like everyone except me had plans and friend groups and fun adventures. I remember sitting in my dorm and reading my Bible, not because it was my first choice, but because I had no other options. If the Lord had granted me my desire for those deep friendships right away, I think of the moments of sweet communion I had with Him in my loneliness that I would have missed out on.

Eventually, the Lord did see fit to bless me with incredible deep friendships with like-minded girls, and now a husband who loves Jesus and loves me very much.

I look back to a specific journal entry the summer before Jon and I started dating. I told the Lord, “I am content.” And truly, I was. After years of discontentment in loneliness and my life circumstances, especially the lack of a relationship, the Lord shifted my heart and I distinctly remember being okay with where He had me, even though it looked different than my desires. It was a shift that only the Lord could have brought about in my heart, and because of that shift, I was more ready to receive with gratitude the upcoming gift of a relationship, and later marriage and family that I had so desired.

It’s not that God will automatically bless us with friends when we are content in loneliness (because that wouldn’t be true surrender), but when we do surrender our emotional needs to Him and find them first met in the Lord, then any human attention is an added bonus, not a necessity that we desperately seek.

Just as there are unhealthy ways of coping with loneliness, there are beneficial steps we can take as well:

1. Embrace silence and solitude.

Silence and solitude are neglected but important spiritual disciplines. Our world is full of distractions. Whether in seasons of loneliness or in seasons of fullness, we need to create intentional times and spaces to withdraw and commune with the Lord in silence. We even see this demonstrated in Jesus, who “often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” (Luke 5:16). Jonathan Edwards, often quoted for his example in spiritual disciplines, says this about solitude:

A true Christian doubtless delights in religious fellowship and Christian conversation, and finds much to affect his heart in it; but he also delights at times to retire from all mankind, to converse with God in solitude. And this also has peculiar advantages for fixing his heart, and engaging his affections. True religion disposes persons to be much alone in solitary places for holy meditation and prayer. . . . It is the nature of true grace, however it loves Christian society in its place, in a peculiar manner to delight in retirement, and secret converse with God. (Edwards, Religious Affections, in Works, 1:311-312)

2. Look for what sins or idols are being uncovered.

The way we response to unmet desires often reveals what we truly love. If you find yourself really struggling with a lack of friends or a relationship, take that opportunity to ask God to search your heart and reveal where your hope is. For me, I saw my idols of wanting to feel desired, wanting everyone to like me, and wanting to be affirmed, to name a few. Often times those difficult seasons are ones the Lord uses intentionally (if you’ll allow Him) to uncover areas of our hearts and lives that are not truly surrendered to Him.

3. Be on the lookout for others who are lonely.

Even though sometimes it feels like everyone else in the world has the friends and relationship we desire, it simply isn’t true. There are many around us longing for a friend and maybe struggling with similar emotions. Instead of focusing inward in self-pity, allow your own loneliness to be the bridge that allows you to notice the loneliness of others and reach out to them.

Looking back now, it may be strange but I do miss the unique communion I had with the Lord in seasons of loneliness. I’ve even struggled in this season of more stability and contentment with not feeling as close to the Lord. When I was more aware of my need for Him in my loneliness, I found myself in deep and regular times of prayer. Now that my life looks more stable, it’s not that I need the Lord any less, but I find myself less aware on a day-to-day basis of how much I need Him. (Something I am currently working through...maybe a blog post for another time ;)

So, if you find yourself in a season of loneliness, my encouragement to you is to refrain from running from the hard feelings and see how the Lord may be intentionally using this time in your life as a gift. My prayer for you is that you, like David, will be able to say, “Find rest, O my soul, in God alone.” (Psalm 62:5)

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

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thelmasirby32 · 4 years

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Easy for You

To Teach, One Must Learn

One of the benefits of writing is it forces you to structure your thoughts.

If you are doing something to pass a test rote memorization can work, but if you are trying to teach someone else and care it forces you to know with certainty what you are teaching.

When I was in nuclear power school one guy was about to flunk out and I did not want to let him so I taught him stuff for days. He passed that test and as a side effect I got my highest score I ever got on one of those tests. He eventually did flunk out, but he knew other people were rooting for him and tried to help him.

Market Your Work or Become Redundant

Going forward as more work becomes remote it is going to be easier to hire and fire people. The people who are great at sharing their work and leaving a public record of it will likely be swimming in great opportunities, whereas some equally talented people who haven't built up a bit of personal brand equity will repeatedly get fired in spite of being amazingly talented, simply because there was a turn in the economy and management is far removed from the talent. As bad as petty office politics can be, it will likely become more arbitrary when everyone is taking credit for the work of others & people are not sitting side by side to see who actually did the work.

Uber recently announced they were laying off thousands of employees while looking to move a lot of their core infrastructure work overseas where labor is cheaper. Lots of people will be made redundant as unicorn workers in a recession suddenly enjoy the job stability and all the perks of the gig working economy.

Design

We have a great graphic designer who is deeply passionate about his work. He can hand draw amazing art or comics and is also great at understanding illustration software, web design, web usability, etc. I have no idea why he was fired from his prior employer but am thankful he was as he has been a joy to work with.

Before COVID-19 killed office work I sat right next to our lead graphic designer and when I would watch him use Adobe Illustrator I was both in awe of him and annoyed at how easy he would make things look. He is so good at it that and endless array of features are second nature to him. When I would ask him how to do something I just saw him do frequently it would be harder for him to explain how he does it than doing it.

Programming

Our graphics designer is also a quite solid HTML designer, though strictly front end design. One day when I took an early lunch with my wife I asked him to create a Wordpress theme off his HTML design and when I got back he was like ... ummm. :)

We are all wizards at some things and horrible at others. When I use Adobe Illustrator for even the most basic tasks I feel like a guy going to a breakdancing party with no cardboard and 2 left shoes.

There are a number of things that are great about programming

it is largely logic-based

people drawn toward it tend to be smart

people who can organize code also tend to use language directly (making finding solutions via search rather easy)

Though over time programming languages change features & some changes are not backward compatible. And as some free & open source projects accumulate dependencies they end up promoting the use of managers. Some of these may not be easy to install & configure on a remote shared server (with user permission issues) from a Windows computer. So then you install another package on your local computer and then have to research how it came with a deprecated php track_errors setting. And on and on.

One software program I installed on about a half-dozen sites many moons ago launched a new version recently & the typical quick 5 minute install turned into a half day of nothing. The experience felt a bit like a "choose your own adventure" book, where almost every choice you make leads to: start again at the beginning.

At that point a lot of the advice one keeps running into sort of presumes one has the exact same computer set up they do, so search again, solve that problem, turn on error messaging, and find the next problem to ... once again start at the beginning.

That sort of experience is more than a bit humbling & very easy to run into when one goes outside their own sphere of expertise.

Losing the Beginner's Mindset

If you do anything for an extended period of time it is easy to take many things for granted as you lose the beginner's mindset.

One of the reasons it is important to go outside your field of expertise is to remind yourself of what that experience feels like.

Anyone who has been in SEO for a decade likely does the same thing when communicating about search by presuming the same level of domain expertise and talking past people. Some aspects of programming are hard because they are complex. But when things absolutely do not work you often get the answer right away. Whereas with SEO you can be unsure of the results of a large capital and labor investment until the next time a core algorithm update happens a quarter year from now. That uncertainty acts as the barrier to entry & blocker of institutional investments which allow for sustained above average profit margins for those who make the cut, but it also means a long lag time and requiring a high level of certainty to make a big investment.

The hard part about losing the beginners mindset with SEO is sometimes the algorithms do change dramatically and you have to absolutely reinvent yourself while throwing out what you know (use keyword rich anchor text aggressively, build tons of links, exact match domains beat out brands, repeat keyword in bold on page, etc.) and start afresh as the algorithms reshuffle the playing field.

The Web Keeps Changing

While the core algorithms are shifting so too is how people use the web. Any user behaviors are shifting as search results add more features and people search on mobile devices or search using their voice. Now that user engagement is a big part of ranking, anything which impacts brand perception or user experience also impacts SEO. Social distancing will have major impacts on how people engage with search. We have already seen a rapid rise of e-commerce at the expense of offline sales & some colleges are planning on holding next year entirely online. The University of California will have roughly a half-million students attending school online next year unless students opt for something cheaper.

Colleges have to convince students for the next year that a remote education is worth every bit as much as an in-person one, and then pivot back before students actually start believing it. It’s like only being able to sell your competitor’s product for a year.— Naval (@naval) May 6, 2020

What Resolution?

I am horrible with Adobe Illustrator. But one of the things I have learned with that and Photoshop is that if you edit in a rather high resolution you can have many of your errors disappear to the naked eye when it is viewed at a normal resolution. The same analogy holds true for web design but in the opposite direction ... if your usability is solid on a mobile device & the design looks good on a mobile device then it will probably be decent on desktop as well.

Some people also make a resolution mistake with SEO.

If nobody knows about a site or brand or company having perfect valid HTML, supporting progressive web apps, supporting AMP, using microformats, etc. ... does not matter.

On the flip side, if a site is well known it can get away with doing many things sub-optimally & can perhaps improve a lot by emulating sites which are growing over time in spite of having weaker brand strength.

Free, so Good Enough?

Many open source software programs do not do usability testing or track the efforts of a somewhat average user or new user in their ability to download and install software because they figure it is free so oh well people should figure it out. That thinking is a mistake though, because each successive increase in barrier to entry limits your potential market size & eventually some old users leave for one reason or another.

Any free software project which accumulates attention and influence can be monetized in other ways (through consulting, parallel SaaS offerings, affiliate ad integration, partnering with Hot Nacho to feature some great content in a hidden div using poetic code, etc.). But if they lack reach, see slowing growth, and then increase the barrier to entry they are likely to die.

When you ask someone to pay for something you'll know if they like it and where they think it can be improved. Relying on the free price point hides many problems and allows them to accumulate.

The ability to make things easy for absolute beginners is a big part of why Wordpress is worth many multiples of what Acquia sold for. And Wordpress has their VIP hosting service, Akismet, and a bunch of other revenue streams while Acquia is now owned by a private equity company.

The ability to be 0.0000001% as successful as Wordpress has been without losing the beginner mindset is hard.

Categories:

marketing

from Digital Marketing News http://www.seobook.com/easy-you

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jtdg15 · 4 years

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The signs as I’ve come to know them:

Alright, so I’ve wanted to this for so long but I’ve never actually gotten around to it, but here we are! Just a side note, this is based off of Sun Signs!

Aries: You guys are so wild, and like I know that sounds stereotypical but it’s so true! You guys have this youthful feeling around you and always seem so bold to go out and get what you want, but never at the expense of others. You have some of the biggest hearts in the zodiac and genuinely care for the relationships you make with those around you. You’re always so helpful, and yet at the same time won’t hesitate to call people out on their bs.

Taurus: You guys are so humble and sweet!! It seems like a lot of people take your kindness for granted and don’t give you enough credit for the amount of love you have for others. You guys always come off as people who daydream a lot and are constantly longing for some sort of stability in your lives. It seems like you’ll put everyone else’s needs before your own, and while this is a noble thing, it leads a lot to you guys feeling so alone and struggling. Stubborn as hell, but that’s not always a bad thing! You guys become very attached to ideas and people and if they fail or leave, you find yourself stuck. Learn to detach yourself from those who aren’t in your life anymore!

Gemini: Oh Gemini, you guys are oh so very confusing, but in a good way! You guys keep so much inside out of fear of being misunderstood by society or those around you, and this can lead to a lot of you guys placing self worth in the hands of others instead of yourselves. You truly want to make everyone happy, but rarely stop to consider if it’s at the expense of your own happiness. You thrive when you are around people who are clear communicators, cutting right to the chase, but also when you are around people who make you feel like life is an adventure!

Cancer: Cancer gets such a bad rep that they truly don’t deserve. Being in touch with how you feel is NOT A BAD THING! You guys are constantly longing for some type of love, and this is only because you want to feel accepted and needed. You all have a very maternal energy to you, and this is why you tend to be the people who others come to for advice! So many of you genuinely want to see the world at peace, but will sometimes use your emotional prowness to manipulate others to get it. Be wary of this, there is always another way!

Leo: Oh Leo, I never know what I’m gonna get from you guys except for one thing: big visions. You guys are constantly thinking about where you wanna be in the future, what you wanna look like, friends you’ll have, the impact you’ll make, etc. Leo’s have been an odd one for me, as many of them, unfortunately, do come off very conceited and self obsorbed, while the others come off as humanitarians and seekers of adventure. Regardless, you all share a grand vision of the future, wether it’s your own or the future of those around you. A smile seems to always be on your faces.

Virgo: You guys, along with Gemini, repress so much of your feelings because you feel that you need to be strong. Virgo, let down your walls! It’s okay to not be in control and it’s okay to not be #1 in everything. You guys struggle a lot with understanding the emotions of others, but it can stem from your own lack of understanding of yourself. Life is not as practical and analytical as you may believe. Leave room for the unknown and faith. You’d be surprised by how much you’d learn! Along with this, release those unrealistic expectations of people that you have, not everyone can be as advanced as you think you are Virgo!

Libra: Oh Libra, always trying to be the mediator but ultimately being a factor in indecisiveness. In your quest to take the middle ground, you’ve become cold towards other people and their lives, simply viewing them as “situations.” Have you ever stopped to consider that the only reason you stay “neutral” is to make yourselves appear better in the eyes of those around you? Now of course this doesn’t hold true to every libra, as many of them genuinely have good intentions, but your indecisiveness leads many people to question your priorities and your values. Stand up for what you believe in!

Scorpio: You guys, like Cancer, get a really bad rep that you don’t deserve. Scorpio, you are so emotional despite what you want others to believe. You hide your emotions from others as you are scared of being betrayed or hurt by the people you come to love. Do not live your life in fear! Let yourself feel the intensity of your emotions and open up to others about it! If they don’t understand you, then you have every right to leave. You guys have some of the biggest hearts in the zodiac, and just because you don’t show it doesn’t mean it’s not true. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to be vulnerable.

Sagittarius: Sag, you guys are truly some of the boldest people I’ve ever met and are not afraid to speak your mind. While this trait may be admirable, it can also lead to you coming off as cocky and overzealous. Learn that not everyone is as ready to face the truth like you are Sag. You guys aren’t ones to back down from taking risks, and much like Aries, go out and get what you want. You all have such “fire” within you (no pun intended,) but watch out for burn out. You’re quick to take action and start new projects, but will quickly give it up at the sign of monotony. Learn that life doesn’t constantly have to be in motion, and appreciate the slow moments where you can rest.

Capricorn: Alright, Capricorn, we gotta relax. Cap, you become so trapped within your own thoughts that you become the very thing you hate seeing in others: close minded. In order for you to grow, you need to begin to allow others to see you for who you are, and not the facade that you display. Structure is good, but disorganization isn’t necessarily chaos. Let yourself “go with the flow” and get out of your own way! Learn to be accepting of help being offered to you! You don’t have to do everything on your own. You have so much hurt within you, that you bury deep down as you don’t want to be a burden to others, but expressing pain doesn’t make you a burden! Lower the expectations for others, but mostly yourself!

Aquarius: Aquarius, always being considered the “odd one out,” when in reality, they, arguably, understand others the most out of all the zodiac. Aquarius, while the observation of other people is a good way to learn about them, how are you using that information in the end? You don’t need to be everyone’s personal background check. Allow yourself to be surprised by other people instead of constantly anticipating what they’ll do next. Use your knowledge of human interaction to better society! As well as this, stop viewing yourselves as the victim for minor inconveniences, instead learn to be humble and accept that not everyone is as far ahead as you perceive yourself to be.

Pisces: Finally we have Pisces. You guys have always fascinated me as you come off as very “alien” like people. There’s something about you guys that’s very mystical. You guys are not afraid to show emotion and usually embrace it, but at the sight of others expressing emotions, you sometimes come off as aloof and not knowing what to do. Many of you are humanitarians and, much like Taurus, you place the needs of others before your own most of the time. Remember that it is not your job to heal everyone, and that sometimes people aren’t as ready as you are to open up. Learn to care for yourself!

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