#so there's a spark of hope to it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cookinguptales · 5 months

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Do me a favor, okay? Next time you have a chance, close your eyes for a minute and take a deep breath and imagine someone loving you.

Imagine someone who gets excited just thinking about you. Imagine someone who loves the things you say and do and who genuinely enjoys spending time with you. Imagine someone who feels lucky every moment they get to be around you.

It can be a real person or someone you just made up. You can imagine them praising you or laughing with you or touching you or whatever love means to you. It can be romantic or otherwise. Take your pick.

And if you had a hard time doing it?

Do it again. And again. And again.

I read once that it’s important for us to visualize being loved. That your brain needs to be trained like a muscle, and like a muscle, it can become weak from disuse. Your brain can only do the things that you practice doing, and if you never, ever visualize someone loving you, it becomes difficult to even imagine someone loving you. You get stuck in a rut. And once it’s impossible to imagine someone loving you, it becomes impossible to believe you will ever be loved.

I think… sometimes it can become easy to stop believing that we’re worthy of love. And I think sometimes we have this fantasy of someone making us believe that we’re worthy of it again. Or that somehow we’ll just — earn it, one day. Being worthy of love and desire, respect and affection.

But I think the truth is that we can only start believing that we’re worthy of love if we’re capable of imagining it. And it becomes much, much easier to imagine it if you practice doing so.

It may feel awkward at first. Embarrassing. Silly. Maybe even painful. But think about it like this, maybe: your first day in a dance class, you’ll fall. You’ll look ridiculous. It’ll feel like your body will never be able to do this fluidly. But by the end of the class, you’ll be able to move in a whole new way. Maybe not perfectly, but… better, y’know?

Learn to waltz with your own mind, and try not to cringe too hard at your first awkward movements. Start small and work your way up if you have to. Someone liking you, then someone liking your conversations, then someone liking your presence, then someone purposefully seeking you out. Someone putting time aside for you. Someone thinking about you when you’re not there. Someone being with you because there’s nowhere they’d rather be.

It may feel self-indulgent, but… I mean, we all deserve to be indulged sometimes. And we all deserve to feel worthy of love.

So… indulge yourself. Take a moment and have a silly little fantasy. Get into the habit of imagining love, and imagining it for the you that exists right now, not the you that you wish you were.

Learn to speak the language of love as it applies to you, even if you think that it doesn’t, and one day you’ll realize how to use those syllables to say your own name.

It’ll come one day. In the meantime, let’s learn to dance together, okay?

#personally...#I mean I am disabled and I am not conventionally attractive #I have PTSD now from the kind of childhood abuse that makes you feel... broken I guess #so I have spent an awful lot of my life finding it difficult to imagine truly being loved #when there are so many 'easier' choices in this world it is hard to imagine someone picking me #so believe me when I say I know it's hard #but I also know that I closed myself off to love once I stopped being able to imagine people doing it #I lost the vocabulary for people loving me so when people did it I could no longer describe it #I didn't notice or worse - it stressed me out #but... I have started doing this visualization exercise and it does help #sometimes I have a spark of... well yes this person in this fantasy does deserve to be loved #and I am that person #so there's a spark of hope to it #hope can be good and hope can be bad but... I guess it's necessary too isn't it?#so let's do our best to make our brains stfu when they're being mean and instead focus on self-love

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anglerflsh · 1 year

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"people didn't get canceled before these sjw" Dante put all the people he disliked in literal hell

#[.txt]#we're at paradiso now because i finished inferno and purgatorio in the last school years and. Babygirl stop staring at your wife in awe #no but it's. it's so fun to read. Blorbo from 1300s #i wish i could meet Dante he's a bit of a bestie to me. Wrote what is now the general consensum for hell and purgatory and paradise #and explicitly said in the beginning of Paradiso that he was just a spark and hoped better flames would grow after him. girl... girl.#i'm normal about historical figures trust me #divina commedia #<-se diventa un post con più di mille note ci finisco io all'inferno

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deep-space-lines · 1 month

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okay but like. I just had the weirdest thought about that ‘don’t look I’m naked’ comic. Which is that that’s essentially the same thing Adam and Eve did after they ate the fruit of knowledge of good&evil. So I feel like the theological implications of that could kneecap Gabe if he doesn’t think V1 is a being with free will.

yeah ok. i dunno man. is this anything

((side note. this isn’t necessarily meant to be in-character or story-accurate or take place at any particular point in time, just a way to explore some Thoughts. i was also imagining more that V1’s words aren't actually spoken, more like Gabriel’s more articulate interpretation of whatever garbled mechanical noise V1 is using to communicate. I think an angel could do that.))

and then they fucked nasty the end

#my art #my writing #who fuckin sent this. fuck you. come off anon so i can kick your ass. (the thoughts this ask sparked consumed almost 3 days of my life)#i dont know what this even is #i just work here #disclaimer i don't come from a particularly religious background so like.#most of my knowledge of christianity comes from when my mom sent me to vbs for cheap babysitting in middle school or absorbed via osmosis #so i have no idea what im talking about except for when i do! hope this helps #i love how i say that like i expect biblical scholars to tear apart my ultrakill gay fanfiction #if you are a biblical scholar and you want to tear apart my ultrakill gay fanfiction please know i am not going to read the bible for this #ultrakill #v1 ultrakill #gabriel ultrakill #gabv1el #blood #love tagging ultrakill stuff with blood. hmm yes the floor here is made out of floor

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intotheelliwoods · 3 months

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You guys wanted to see some Raph, heres some Raph!

Masterpost

#wuahg #oh I have not drawn in ages #I forgot how to draw hugs!#heres hoping I can get that drawing spark back again!#but oh man the college + work combo has been killing me already haha #2 arms left #rottmnt #rise leo #future leo #rise raph #hamato leonardo #hamato raphael #also this comic ended up #way shorter than I thought it was going to be omg????#what a bitty update-#arguably one of the most bitty updates #this could count as a mini comic its so bitty

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agir1ukn0w · 5 months

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sorry but snow is such a well written iconic villain and donald sutherland performs him so fucking good it's almost hilarious how i start practically foaming at the mouth every time the man opens his mouth to say something deplorable in those movies, like he's so utterly and despicably wrong about almost every crucial thing from katniss and peeta's relationship to human nature as a whole and yet the second he starts talking about how hope is the only thing stronger than fear and how you have to allow a little hope but control it so its spark doesn't grow into revolution and how it's the things we love the most that destroy us you bet your ass i am on the floor screaming crying throwing up because that is my psychotic mustache-twirling villain RIGHT THERE

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heartorbit · 8 months

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a new world together

#project sekai #emu otori #pjsk #prsk #proseka #colorful stage #HAPPY BIRTHDAY EMU!!!!! MY BAYABTBTBTHTBTB MY ITTY BOTTY MY SILLY WILLY DAUGHTER MY DESTROYER OF WORLDS. HANDS HER A SWITLY LOLLIPOP.#🍭FOR YOU MY BEAUTIFUL SON. I LOVE MY BESUTIFUL SON.#i make bday profiles for all of wondershow but I FEEL LIKE I DIDNT DO AS GOOD ON EMUS. IM SAD. T_T IT'S STILL CUTE BUT... HEEEM.....#WAAAAAH WAAAUAUAUAUAUGUGUUHGU WAAAAAH #UEUEUUEUEE T____T!!!!!#i had to spark her bday card. i ammdown to 2000 gems. darkness fes here i come.#IM SO SAD I HAVE TO SKIP EMUS PAINTER CAAAAAARD ITS SO CUTE I LOVE IT SO MUUUCH ill draw the outfit lots.... snimiffle. and hope it comes #to me during color fest. About to go play more splatfest i had to finish this while its still the 9th FRYESWEEEEEP PLEASE BE IN THE LEEEEAD #EDIT I LIEEEEED PAINTER EMU IS MIIINE EHEHEHYEJEYEHEHEYEHEY #Peaches and love on planet earth:)#EDIT OH MY GOD IM SO SORRY FOR RUSHING THIS TO GO PLAY SPLATFE ST I DIDNT REALIZE HER RIGHT ARM IS SO MESSED HELPME its fine shes perfect

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moonlume · 3 months

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fav spacey stuff I've drawn over the last couple of years 🌙

#my drawings and wares #artists on tumblr #digital art #art #illustration #cute art #kawaii #cute #my art #space #aesthetic #aesthetic art #stickers #man i hope i can get my spark back one day. ive been drawing so little lately.. running the biz has really taken it out of me tbh

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raygirlramblings · 9 months

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They then skipped happily into the sunset to destroy all of the Phantoms stuff 😀

This is basically what I want Rayman and Rabbid Mario to have XD. A friendship and camaraderie based on punching stuff :)

Poor Ray is going to have a LOT to take in meeting the SoH Rabbids (flashbacks etc) and it will probably throw him off his normal groove. But Rabbid Mario was just so ready to befriend this weird limbless eggplant dude and only got freaked out after accidentally pulling his hand off. I just get the impression RMario wouldn’t like seeing anyone sad and would try in his weird way to offer support. Turns out their hobbies aren’t too dissimilar :)

#Rayman #mario rabbids sparks of hope #rayman in the phantom show #Rabbid Mario #It helps that Rayman has no arms so RMario doesn’t feel threatened by his ‘muscular physique’ XD #I JUST WANT THEM TO BE FRIENDS #THIS ISNT EVEN A SHIP THING #let the boys BOND #My arts

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sqwdkllr · 6 months

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My childhood in one guy

#rayman #rayman in the phantom show #mario and rabbids sparks of hope #fanart #my art #that last time I have ever drawn him was like in 2022 I think? on ig stories #anyways THAT DLC DESIGN IS SOOOO GOOD I WAS SO HAPPY SEEING IT #THE CONCEPT ART BEHIND IT IS SO FUN TO SEE TOO #the person who thought of giving him eyebags was a real one #deserves an actual medal perhaps #also brown eyes supremacy

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greatestjubilee · 5 months

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bleh

#hi all. lucy here #i have barely been drawing lately because ive just been unable to #like i feel like i lost my spark. i dunno #i used to draw so much and make so many comics when i was absolute rock bottom mentally #like the funnier i was the worse i was doing #ive been better lately but i truly feel like ive almost sacrificed my ability to draw or create stuff for some more mental stability #i just....i dont know. i feel like i can't do anything i used to do with art. like im not funny or have no ideas or just think stuff like #oh ill just draw this because people will wanna see it #but i gave that up because not even i wanna see it anymore #i hope that i can feel like drawing again one day i just dont know how to get it back. it really feels like ive lost a major part of myself #this is my rambling here just to let you know i am still around just kind of laying low because im drained

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drenched-in-sunlight · 3 months

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monster

Rusty and O’Keeffe talk.

- or, birds are meant for the sky, and not to be shot down by dumb, stupid boys.

* this is a character analysis of Rusty, or rather, the version of him that is in my head. Based on the premise of Rusty/621 and O’Keefe/Flatwell.

- dragonfly signals the end of summer and the start of winter

- it also represents self-realization and divine revelation

This is like a fever dream (i drew these 19 pages in 3 days), but I’d love to hear what you think :)

#armored core #armored core 6 #v.iv rusty #v.iii o’keeffe #c4 621 #middle flatwell #viv621 #rusty’s divorced spy dads #albi’s art #I hope it’s clear that the narrator is unreliable as hell cuz Rusty is disassociating during a lunch break #just normal guy thing #lately I’ve been having some crisis about whether ppl still enjoy my ac6 content #so I’d love to hear if this sparks anything in you #me the whole time drawing this: am I having a stroke #oughhh my wrist

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robinfollies · 1 month

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Been really pondering Fantoccio and the cursed citizens lately… like, if you’re stuck in a city for 15 years with some of your only company being these cursed globby versions of the people that used to surround you normally, you’d start to Notice Things that remind you of who they used to be, right?

#I HAVE SO SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS GUY HE MAKES ME SOOO SAD. FANTOCCIO….#i really do think about his time in the city a lot. like a whooole lot.#like ofc these are weird amorphous blobs but yknow. there may still be some semblance of who they used to be within them #they have old habits or hang around in places they used to live idk idk.#they still have some of that old humanity they used to hold i guess… even in their cursed forms…#a little spark of hope that maybe everything will go back to normal someday #i dunno. and maybe eventually they even start to LOOK normal. all in ur head #fanto’s supposed to be younger here btw!! id personally put him at around 12-14 maybe?#also the bear baker’s name is Miss Cardamom!! unfortunately she is doomed by the narrative…. so sad… ú_ù #the bg characters were VERY VERY FUN to design!!! hehehe #billie bust up #bbu fantoccio #bbu the fella #robin’s art #2024 art #didnt mean to go as hard on the art as i did… twas supposed to just be a simple sketch comic HAHA #comicfollies

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kaltacore · 3 months

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no but essek's abnormal behaviours in the last arc and especially in episode 140 are my roman empire. which is ironic because aeor is something of a roman empire itself. but in all seriousness, it was the episode that made me realise i love essek and his development so much and it kinda summarised it even before caleb's epilogue.

and i mean the "it's not fair" scene specifically. it's like, an epitome of his whole character progression from a person who put An Objectively Important Goal above all else without hesitation to someone who can't help but care for people around even more than his goal, no matter how big and relevant it is.

the mighty nein - and he alongside them - pretty much saved the world and freed an ancient city from thousand-year-long suffering. they defeated nine extremely powerful menacing entities who managed to stay out of everyone's sight for years and were so close to achieving their goal and dooming exandria in the process. they did the impossible and became heroes and somehow, they survived, even though they had bidden farewells a couple of hours ago because they had already understood what they had been facing. and nevertheless. they made it.

and none of them was celebrating.

mighty nein are basically essek's only friends. he knew them to be very unusual people, to put it lightly, loud and stubborn and completely inescapable once they consider you to be one of their own. and they showed him so much kindness and put so much faith in him, they were here playing the most atrocious music ever and digging clay in his backyard for a spell they invented just to help one of theirs and asking him if he could bring them pastries the day after they found out he was lying to them and had started a war. they were chaotic and weird and sometimes unbearable but most importantly they were carrying so much hope with them all this time - a hope they could end the war, a hope they could stop the angel of irons cult, a hope they could get better, a hope he could get better, and now, finally, that they could save their lost friend.

and that hope shattered, just like that, the moments after they'd already made the impossible. they saved so many souls - and then could not get back just that one.

for essek "my intentions were never good they were important" thelyss it just. shouldn't have mattered. they won. it could have been worse. people die and when they die they rarely come back. they should've been happy everyone else barely made it alive.

but for some reason, mighty nein being so defeated after they saved the world exposed him to that overwhelming feeling of injustice and unfairness. and i mean, there were many things essek considered to be unfair, but when i watched his first appearance and his interactions with mighty nein later on til their reunion in aeor arc, i wouldn't dare to guess that one of the things on that list would be something that personal. and personal not even to him.

the thing is, essek didn't even know who that guy was. why mighty nein cared about him so much. he had an idea, i guess, that he was their friend once, or someone in that body was. it was also a person who wanted to unleash a terrifying horrific aberration onto the material plane. it was a person very dedicated to killing essek and his friends - and they still didn't take any pleasure in fighting him. essek didn't feel strongly about lucien or molly, because he never knew them.

i don't think he mourned his death and failed resurrection. he mourned mighty nein's hope, the one they put in him when they had no reason to, the one they offered yasha in the cathedral and the one they kept after the spell for veth failed and the one they carried til the very end because they wanted it to reach molly. they had saved people with this hope. they had saved nations. they had saved the world. but they ended up feeling like it hadn't even been worth anything.

how desperate would it feel, witnessing people who for some reason always saw good in you when they absolutely shouldn't, who made literal miracles out of nothing, who ended wars and fought gods and tricked the hags and freed cities from horrors beyond anyone's comprehension purely because they thought it was the right thing to do and also loved their friends this much, silently crying over a dead body they couldn't bring back to life? how desperate would it feel to realise that with all your knowledge about time you dedicated your life to and threw away any principles for, you can't undo this? no one can. some things are left to fate alone and this time it wasn't kind to them. no matter how much good they did, they still got slapped in the face.

and it was, i think, such a genuine moment of empathy. like, essek is the character who prefers to put up a facade and act distant and self-composed but this time he just. walked away unable to watch this. the could only say to fjord that it wasn't fair. even when he was caught off guard in nicodranas he was able to explain himself and his motives to an extent even though he was a nervous wreck whose extra important plan went to hell the second the only people he cared about appeared. this time he had nothing to elaborate on. it just wasn't fair. it wasn't fair his friends didn't get what they wanted the most. it wasn't fair he couldn't do anything to make it right.

it is such a sad and beautiful and even cathartic scene because it is about person who started a war that destroyed so many lives - and then met this ragtag group of weirdos who saw a lonely stand-offish guy and said "hey, let's be friends!" and didn't even wait for him to answer. he saw them being serious and calculated and he saw them being ridiculous and extremely stupid, he saw their mistrust to outsiders and their loyalty to each other, he made spells with them and paid a visit to their hot tub, he ate their stale pastries and drank their hot chocolate mixed with whiskey, he was welcomed amongst them and in their wonderful home, both in xhorhas before they even found out what he had done and in the tower when they already knew - and then, he saw them mourning their loss, defeated and helpless, and he, a person who believed there were things more important than whole nations, let alone just one life, couldn't help but share the pain they felt. a pure display of compassion from someone who detached himself from it, who didn't believe he could grow into a better person capable of it again, but became one nonetheless without even realising it

#sorry. i cannot shut up about this. this scene stuck with me the moment i saw it and i just couldn't get it out of my head #i mean. i liked essek well enough. i just got attached to other characters more. but then 'it's not fair' happened and it sealed the deal #it was just. so beautiful. so sincere. so important for a character who just started to learn how to care about people #his reaction wasn't intentional. it didn't change anything. but it showed how humane he had become. how deeply he cared #mighty nein are no joke pal #they're gonna make you feel all these unknown emotions like sympathy and love and affection even when they're incredibly painful #essek experiencing closeness and attachment in all their forms. as something beautiful and something aching. is so important to me #they saved him because they had good hearts! and these good hearts sparked so much joy around them!#but if a good heart grants you an ability to experience joy so profoundly. it makes everything else feel like that #you get it. i hope you get it. anyway e140 did so much psychic damage on me i probably will never recover #in a good way mostly <3 but yeah. yeah. it makes me feel a little insane #the mighty nein #essek thelyss #critical role

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jell-o101 · 2 months

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