#so i can't seem to do anything

[cistematicchaos]

Fuck me. my mom is experiencing loads of long covid symptoms and i just. i can't even offer tips/help, bc if i mention covid, she immediately shuts down the conversation and denies we ever had it. and i want to scream, bc she's obviously ill and keeps saying "im just having trouble getting over that virus haha" and its so ridiculous!

i know its prbly like her way of coping with y'know, giving me covid and endangering the other immune compromised ppl in the house by letting my brother go out unmasked constantly to classes w/big groups but talk about biting off your nose to spite your face. im so pissed and i feel like i don't even have a right to be bc she's obviously fucked herself over n is already suffering. i hate this.

#chaos is speaking #disability #long covid #its just #some of my other siblings are showing long covid symptoms too #and like #what the fuck am i supposed to do. #im apparently crazy bc i think we had covid #like the entirehousehold thinks im a paranoid freak #bc of what m mom said abt it #so i can't seem to do anything #to make ppl listen to me #i feel so useless #what if one of my siblings dies from this #what if my mom dies from this? we're fucked!! #fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

[robotpussy]

#polls #personally i dont like it but thats only because i dont like fandom. the type of stuff that gets the most attention #in fandom usually just annoys me idk. how to explain it in a way that wont come off as me saying #fanfic or whatever is evil its just the fact that it just bombards alot of the conversations? #i prefer it when the thing i like has 10 fans and theyre all on one message board or forum #like for example mtvs downtown is getting popular but apart from annoying #'me and the mid nerd guy i copped by being weird and sexy' posts its not awful.... #but then smth like... clone high or smth i suddenly cant remember ppl just got so annoying abt that show?? #like i cant stand it i dont even bother watching it anymore plus its just weird to me now like i can't watch it regardless #im just rambling but personally i do not like it. like i dont want what i like to get a revival #i dont want anything new! i just want to enjoy the thing and move on 😭 #fandom seems to prioritize shipping and memes over evaluating or simply just enjoying something! #this goes for anything. music film tv books....

[egophiliac]

How do you imagine Levan/Revan/ Mallenoa's husband?

Appearance, personality etc.

Revaan/Laverne/whatever-his-name-is's title sort of implies that he might be from a fantasy-Eastern country (they've established that in Twstland, 竜 = Eastern-style dragons, andドラゴン = Western-style dragons). and that's about as much as we know right now about...anything in regards to what he might look like. so I've been trying very hard not to form too much of a mental picture of him, because I'm still hoping we'll get to see him (or at least a silhouette)! ergo, in my head, he kind of looks like this:

so handsome. surely Malenoa fell in love at first glance.

I do think the funniest thing about what we've learned so far is that Malleus being kind of quiet and reserved and dignified...absolutely did not come from the Draconias. and he sure as heck did not learn it from Lilia. so he probably got a lot of that from his dad! the vibe I get from how Lilia talks about him is that he could be a bit of a prim little fancyboy sometimes, but was (mostly) willing to go along with his wife's zany antics out of love. he sounds sweet, honestly! I'm sorry he (maybe) died. :(

my favorite thing about Mal's parents is that Malenoa and Lilia's dynamic was "long-suffering guard and princess who has long been the cause of said suffering":

but then they would happily join forces in order to gang up on Revaan:

tl;dr Revaan was the straightman in Malenoa and Lilia's comedy act until it all ended horribly whoops

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #can't wait to be proven wrong about all of this! #no seriously if it means more episode 7 i literally cannot wait #oh revaan. hopefully they will not make us wait much longer to learn...anything at all about you #international relations probably got a lot easier once he was around to do the diplomatic stuff #the malenoa-revaan-lilia dynamic seemed to largely revolve around lilia and revaan's shared understanding #that malenoa does whatever she wants and neither of them can stop her #god i love them #while we're on the subject i found out the other day that the romanization of the name eleanor is エレノア #so i wonder if malenoa is actually meant to be something like maleanor as a takeoff on that #i am going to stick with malenoa for now but i think that's kind of cute! #we desperately need some kind of confirmation on revaan's name though twst please #if malleus' dad is actually named laverne i need to know

[itwoodbeprefect]

the thing about bad buddy is that calling it enemies to lovers is not entirely wrong and is a very succinct and easy way to indicate the general plot, but also one of the only moments that the two main characters are actually personally in conflict with each other lasts about four minutes and is expressed mainly through upset shirtless xylophone playing contrasted with a montage of happy moments that features a time there was triumphant shirt-wearing xylophone playing. and then they both say sorry at literally the exact same time

#which as it turns out is EXACTLY how i want my enemies to lovers plots by the way. there is literally no way to beat this #if anything it's. enemies (through circumstance. unwillingly) to lovers (by choice. enthusiastically) #* #bad buddy #bad buddy the series #edit. actually ALSO worth noting that even this brief xylophone-expressed conflict only happens because of their differing views #on how to deal with outside influences on their relationship. which is doing just fine except for those pressures from around them #and then it's RESOLVED by pran going yeah i worry about people finding out but i care about you more #essentially already stating the whole final we can't change the world but that doesn't mean we have to let the world change us thing #and fjdkfj. yeah i'll stop adding tags now. ridiculous how wildly rewatchable a show is that at first glance seems so low on plot

[blueskittlesart]

at a certain point i think we need to acknowledge that art is very rarely created accidentally. if you can see a theme in a work than that theme was, more likely than not, at least somewhat intentional on behalf of the creator. you don't put a piece of yourself out into the world without thinking about what it means at least a little bit.

#sigh. sorry got a comment like 'nintendo creates these accidentally heartbreaking scenarios and then fans add depth' and i just. #do you really think that not a single professional adult writer on the oot writing team thought about the implications of the scenario they #were writing. do you think that all of the ways in which the world is set up to reinforce the themes brought up by that scenario are also #accidental. do you think writing is just throwing shit at a wall and seeing what sticks without any more complex thought. #do you truly genuinely think that in a game so constrained by storage & software limitations ANYTHING about that story would be accidental #it just seems like such a sad and reductive way to view art. it's like you can't imagine that anything is done in earnest. #that people might really care about the things they create. that they might be truly meaningful. #the mcuification of story analysis. we just assume that nothing has substance anymore ig. our brains are so flooded with consumerist #garbage that we assume all art is made purely for consumption and profit. ok #WHATEVER. sorry. i have this disease where im obsessed with video games as art and i hate that no one sees it like i do #personal

[do-you-know-this-queer-character]

Do you know this queer character?

Jaskier is Sapioromantic and Pansexual, and uses he/him pronouns!

#hoooo boy okay I found quotes from the actor saying both sapioromantic and pansexual so that's what we're going with #even though the sapioromantic part does not seem to be widely acknowledged in fandom it was mentioned specifically by name #someone also submitted polyamorous but I can't find anything about that so lmk if it's true #jaskier #the witcher #witcher netflix #twn #julian alfred pankratz #tumblr polls #fandom polls #poll #sapioromantic #pansexual #he/him #live action #video game #lgbtqia #do you know this queer character

[fate-defiant]

🦋~I want you to kiss me, I want you to remake me I want to drown in this moment of captivation~🦋

(I fucking did it dear god that was so many fucking layers)

#princess tutu #ahirue #ahiru #duck #rue #fanart #my art #this was by all means supposed to be a quick shitpost #but then I was looking at the sketch and the flats #and was like “this is bleak. dismal. i can do More” #so i did it for realsies and look how pretty it turned out #it feels good to complete something #i havent done that since like 2020?...21? i dont remeber 💀 #and i can't lie i had fun figuring out the shading on the hair and skin #it was very fun #i mightve drowned this in way too many glowy effects though. i tend to do that a lot #but I decidedly do not care look how dope all that glitter is this was so fuuuuuun #if the lighting seems bogus no it isnt and bullshitting the light source is an honored artistic tradition. so #do not @me about anything ever #god tumblr nerfed the image quality so much #i was gonna upload this as JPEG but that looked even worse than this #well whatever. whatever #hitting post now good night IM DONE. 10 HOURS BABY I DID IT ITS A FINISHED ILLUSTRATION WHOO HOOOOOOOO

[chloecherrysip]

We're going to save your brother.

#mario movie #mario movie spoilers #super mario bros #super mario bros movie #super mario bros movie spoilers #princess peach #mareach #cherrysip edits #I FEEL LIKE THIS MOMENT DID NOT GET THE ATTENTION AND APPRECIATION IT DESERVED ON HERE #man i could write you an essay about this #i do think that the 'i'm not afraid! i'll do anything for my brother' line actually ISN'T said during this scene - it's probably earlier #but that this line IS in the right place (peach's mouth movements match) #which means that scene is going to break me because it just seems like a very vulnerable sweet moment between them #where peach and mario get to talk about the situation they're in and their fears and how big the stakes are for both of them #peach fighting to protect her kingdom and her subjects - the immense pressure on her to stop bowser because of her role as a leader #and mario desperately trying to save his brother - not knowing if luigi is ok or not and not being able to keep him safe is so painful #i think that's why mario doesn't have his hat on - the adventure is starting to weigh on him and he opens up to peach for the first time #about him and luigi and their closeness and how he CAN'T lose his brother he CAN'T let him down when he needs him more than ever #and peach reassures him and it means the world. even in this quick clip there's something a little sad about his face #but also there's relief and gratefulness to her for saying that. they're the absolute sweetest :) :) :) #i could be off base but that really does seem like the vibe of this scene from what we've seen and i am ALL ABOUT IT

[quirkle2]

first amv be nicies to me about it or else

#qktalks #new hobby found ! achievement get #there was a lyric at the very start of this song (that i cut out bc it was slow and i wanted it to be a bit crazier) #that says ''i can't seem to stay me'' which was sorta the origin of why i picked this one #so there ya go #the first half is a lil rough ngl.i recognize this and if u make fun of me ill cry right on ur person #i thought i hated editing but it turns out once u have a halfway decent editing program the process Doesn't make u wanna cry #i have another song in mind but im not sure there's rly enough footage of what i want for it ... hrrmm #mob psycho 100 #mob psycho #mp100 #shigeo kageyama #mp100 mob #mp100 shigeo #flashing #<- dunno if it's necessary but just to be sure #i do kinda like that amvs take way less time than most of my other hobbies #like art takes forever building anything in any game takes centuries writing can take a long time depending on the length #but u can kinda just whip up an amv in one sitting if u know what ur doing #i Didn't know what i was doing when making This so it took me a couple days but ! now i know the basics of the program so yay

[starflungwaddledee]

this is a long shot and i'm sorry to ask, but if you don't mind, can mutuals (or contacts or regulars... just... this community) of mine who aren't jumping ship like... let me know? will any of us still be here? is it over? i'm trying to know if this really is it or what's... even happening. i hate to reassurance seek but i'm feeling pretty miserable and confused.

edit: felt like i was being really pitiful and fragile making this but everybody is being so nice to me and responding so patiently with all your thoughts and i'm in tears of gratitude thank you thank you thank you 💖

#i glanced and thought they brought out a feature so that we could turn off ai access #that seemed... okay? i thought? but now i'm really confused. i don't know. i'm so tired and scared. i just can't... keep doing this #i know this is stupid but this feels like it's my fault. #it happens every time i find something. if i'm happy somewhere. it just.... poof. goes away. i'm sorry. i'm sorry. i'm sorry #on the edit: i would only *ever* think this about myself. double standards that i hold for myself are high. i expect emotional control #& performance from myself only. i would never think badly of anyone else being stressed about this or anything. thank you for your kindness #this community has been so beautiful and kind at every turn. i'm so grateful to get to be here and meet you all #okay... being really sappy now. y'all get to see my anxiety first hand today!! whee!! anyway. i'll get it together. haha! thank you.

[vivitalks]

more adhd jason grace or die by my sword

#jason grace #heroes of olympus #pjo #riordanverse #is he a strong leader. yes. is he the most forgetful man you ever met. also yes #could he kill you with a lightning strike. yes. does he often get lost in his activity du jour and forget to sleep. ALSO YES #stuff #also side note - more dyslexic jason specifically struggling at chb #where everything is labeled in ancient greek for the greek demigods' ease of comprehension #this is a fic waiting to happen but like #jason being completely lost with every sign around camp because his latin wired brain can't read that shit #he doesnt say anything because he's like 'im the guest here i should just learn ancient greek' #easier said than done his brain Rebels against learning it he tries but none of it seems to stick #until someone notices how jason will just blank-stare the sign posted on the armory door that says 'closed for cleaning' #and it's written in english too but that doesn't help jason he's almost as bad at reading in english as he is in ancient greek #so he DEFINITELY cant read the smaller print that says 'do not enter under threat of being eaten by cleaning harpies' #and our man just walks right in and almost gets eaten lmao #and then nico or someone is like. hmm. has anyone considered that this roman dyslexic demigod just cant fucking read ancient greek lmao #cue a campwide project to add latin to all the signs #these tags are a runaway train i just want more adhd dyslexic jason grace that's all

[yzafre]

Roxas: Had the Halloween town kids throw bombs in his face for multiple missions in a row before finally breaking down and smacking them around a bit.

Ventus: The dwarves were rude and refused to talk to him, immediately resorted to chasing them down and whacking them.

Characterization I see frequently: Ah, yes, Roxas is the one always willing to throw hands and Ventus is a smol sunshine boy.

#kh #kingdom hearts #these are really silly examples but the point stands! #in fact I think it expands when you look at their full screen-time #I am once again begging people to watch a full let's play of Days #don't get me wrong Ventus IS brightness and sunshine #but he also has the energy of a chihuahua ready to fight the world and I will stand by that #where as Roxas will tend to just try to avoid it until he Very Much Can't #now I think Roxas does BITTERNESS better than Ventus or Sora #but bitterness is not temper #in fact bitterness is usually negative emotions left on the backburner until the resentment caves in on itself #I suppose this is up to interpretation but from my reading... #a lot of times Ventus seems to burn out his anger then let it go #whereas Roxas doesn't do anything with the emotions until he/the situation self-destructs catastrophically so it ends up being nastier #but on the day-to-day? #yeah no Ventus is going to be the one reacting first #you can also exchange Sora for Ventus for some of these arguments #though I think he lands somewhere between Ventus and Roxas for short-temperedness #all this is more complicated than this reductive commentary of course #you have to take in how and in what orders the characters were introduced and marketed #the difficulty of getting the handheld games historically and the biases that set in before they were easily accessed #not to mention stock archetypes for fandom joke set-ups that then perpetuate the characterization... #like there's a LOT to how this came to be #but it Gets To Me sometimes #yza talks about a thing

[apple-grass-and-smiles]

Very cool and not heartbreaking at all for the PJO show to emphasize that Percy is an outsider not only because he's new to the whole demigod thing, but also because he doesn't know the rules of being a traumatized kid with all the daddy/mommy issues possible

#Percy all the time: wait I treated them with kindness and didn't do anything bad #why am I not being treated kindly in return #absolutely everyone else: why on earth would you be entitled to basic human decency? #(and for the kids it's 1000% down to trauma and how they've been raised #so many of the foster kiddos I work with do the same thing #they either have to be so good and perfect (Clarisse and annabeth) that they can't be ignored which works until the parent moves #the goalpost and they're left in the dust with a perfect report card that doesn't get them a second glance #or they have to be so bad that their parents have to intervene (Luke) because #and say it with me folks #bad attention is the same as good attention if it's the only kind you ever get!! #watching this and revisiting TLT specifically has been crazy because they're kids who have been removed from home at their core #that's what our main cast of demigods are #all the year-round kids are removed from home and Percy's ability to go back home and love it just as much as he loves camp is something #that separates him throughout the series #he has a safe place to land during the TLO summer and he's using it and no one else seems to have that #Percy has a stupidly hard life but he has a home base to go to and most of those kids can't even comprehend that as an option #Percy's home is his greatest strength and it'll also forever be something that sets him apart from his peers #I just have thoughts on pjo and foster kids guys #silence emily #percy jackson #pjo tv #I'm arguing this isn't even a spoiler because it's been a running theme. fight me

[toasteaa]

There was a Statue of the Seven literally 10 feet away...

#toast talks #I can't take anything seriously oh my fuckin god #I had a moment where I remembered the ''oh...nines...'' scene in nier automata but then the vibe switched and... #Look I can't help that drawing Neuvillette all scrunky is what my brain wants to do 50% of the time. I just go with it #As you can see the vibe switched in the middle of the doodle so I had to open a whole new canvas for this joke #Anyways. Toast breaks herself out of her art block by making an old man cry. Seems legit LOL #genshin impacted #oc tag: eclair dumont #genshin oc #genshin impact oc #oc x canon #genshin x oc #genshin impact #alright that's enough for vis tags I'm going to bed 🫡😴

[rotisseries]

rick riordan dickriders on here will be like "why are you complaining about the pjo tv show, go watch the movies and see what a bad adaptation really looks like" ok well listen to the musical watch it on youtube and see what a good adaptation looks like bitch. it can be done. as a fucking stage musical. what did that 15 million per episode do for disney that chris mccarell couldn't

#this is such a mean post from someone who does genuinely like the show I'm sorry #like there are aspects I really love!! and aspects I really don't!! which makes it mid for me #but I do genuinely like it overall. at least enough to continue watching #it's just that I see sooooo many people who seem to have this attitude like you can't critique it at all?? #and their arguments are usually just. “movies were worse” (so we'll take anything now as long as it's not that?) #or “rick was involved in the writing” (<- NOTTT guaranteed to be a good thing lmao) #anyway it's pissing me off. I'm gonna bitch. “if you like the books so much read the books” I WAS PROMISED A BOOK ADAPTATION #AM I WRONG FOR COMPLAINING WHEN I DON'T GET WHAT I WAS PROMISED #“oh but changes are okay as long as it preserves the spirit of the books” since when was the *spirit* of the books a FUCKING BORE🤨 #also the cast doesn't deserve this. stick leah and aryan and walker in a better show #pjo #pjo tv show #pjo disney+ #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #the lightning thief musical #anyway all this to say some of the changes and choices are Actually Bad and it won't kill you to admit that I think #rereading this post in the drafts and editing before posting when I was handwringing about how mean it was bitch this is mild

[gideonisms]

the Immediate switch from "this is bearable" to "I wanna kms" any time my boss switches up the schedule by an hour at random (happens weekly)

#i feel like i am using 100% of my energy surviving and it's been that way for years #i can't think of anything better to try for. my brain just doesn't do that most of the time #i just don't even know what it would feel like if things were better or what i want #i don't have that in me #friends and family are wondering why i can't move on or set goals or get better or seem happier. and i just. #everything has to come out of something else if i do the laundry it comes out of the energy i have to go out #if i go out i lose the energy i have to feel okay while i'm at work #if i watch a show or read it comes out of my do the dishes energy #if i try to message people on dating apps it comes out of my work social energy storage and i get weird #if i do job apps or my taxes it comes out of the emotional regulation energy and i get angry unexpectedly #i just can't find a way to have more energy i have tried everything and i'm still so tired