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#reconciling with my feelings

drenched-in-sunlight · 8 months

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A little comic I did for an AU where Arquebus captured 621 right after the Ice Worm mission and they never managed to escape.

Freud and Snail who captured a scavenger bird.

Rusty who did not get the chance to confess.

621 who did not remember a single thing.

vögelchen means little bird.

I feel dumb posting the comic without even posting my design of Freud and Snail yet so I include them at the end.

#armored core #armored core 6 #v.iv rusty #v.i freud #v.ii snail #c4 621 #o’keeffe: y’all fighting over this one merc and have the audacity to make fun of me for pinning after my ex wife??#ngl I were going to let Rusty said reconcile with the ex wife but I realize not everyone is familiar with the flatwell is o’keeffe’s ex wif #lore…which is tragic #he hasn't confessed but i drew this feeling like it's NTR #time to get Ortus and run Freud and Snail over Rusty #IDK if I’ll continue this AU I’m out of juice for now but of somehow 621 will remember #albi’s art #technically this is an excuse to draw someone punching Snail

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ecoterrorist-katara · 3 months

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I kind of love how Zutara has two distinct ship dynamics

dynamic 1: “I will save you from the pirates,” enemies-to-lovers, Zuko is dangerous but sexy, bad boy x good girl, morally grey antihero, Dramione vibes etc

dynamic 2: Zuko is an awkward turtleduck, idiots-to-lovers, pining for your best friend, having each other’s backs, thinking she’s the coolest thing since sliced bread, Percabeth vibes etc

We can argue about which is the correct interpretation until the cows come home, but I love that the possibilities exist in the first place. From s1 to post-series headcanons there are such distinct stages in their relationship, and you can basically pick whichever point that appeals to you and run with it. There’s something for everyone. Yet another reason why they’re the best ship y’all

#In general I think women are shamed for liking the enemies to lovers dynamic bc toxic or whatever #And what I like about ZK is you don’t have to feel guilty for liking the bad boy x good girl because they get way healthier later on #but the belligerent romantic tension remains and that opens up a lot of possibilities for fan interpretation #Not that women should feel guilty for liking what they like in the first place esp in fiction #But fiction that allows you to reconcile what you should like vs what you actually like can be very cathartic #And ofc the fact that Bryke talk about ZK as if only dynamic 1 exists is baffling #I should embrace my destiny as a Bryke anti because really it’s getting out of hand #Zutara #Enemies to lovers #My meta #technically?

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avi-on-jumblr · 5 months

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it's so hard to explain to people who aren't jewish the profound sense of loneliness we feel when our posts about any other cause get ten times the engagement, but whenever we share something about antisemitism, the only people who engage are other jews. it's not about likes, but it feels like screaming into the void. we post about the latest synagogue attack, or about our community getting bomb threats, or how another jew got assaulted on the streets, or killed at a protest. and the world sees it, and doesn't blink. doesn't care. because they can care about anyone on the entire planet, defend them, speak up for them, but a jew? well, we aren't people, are we. we'll never count.

how fucking bad does it have to get for my friends to share a single fucking post.

#vent post #ok to reblog #i don't think i can ever feel totally safe around someone who isn't jewish again. and i hate that so much.#i hate that i cant trust my friends. the people i love. to stand with me if people start killing us again #will they watch? will they think we deserve it? will they join in?#and maybe theyre not personally posting blood libel but they're friends with people who do #how are we supposed to reconcile that?#jumblr #antisemitism #avi posts

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oneluckydragon · 10 months

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We'd both been so excited for it-- to change, to grow stronger, to pass another life-changing milestone on our adventure together. But after I evolved, it took weeks before Sora could even bring herself to look me in the eyes. It went unsaid between us, poisoning our hearts like a cold, bitter curse and haunting every intake of breath. Although, the worst of it all... was that even without words, we both knew why it hurt so much.

Like some sick joke, I had become the spitting image of him.

Ya'll know that feeling when you [Hero] try to evolve into a Leafeon to be closer in spirit to the best friend you lost [Grovyle] because you miss him so much it physically aches, but instead you end up looking like the guy you trusted/adored that betrayed/tried to kill you and your girlfriend? Cause damn it hurts.

Anyways ever since I replayed EOS and evolved at Luminous Spring I've had thoughts about what Sora's reaction would be to Echo's evolution into Umbreon. And lemme tell you that it's an emotional roller coaster. To say that Sora has complicated feelings about Dusknoir is an understatement, and Echo isn't so happy about it either since she had put her faith in him. They've got a lot of trauma to heal.

But to add to that, I like to write about my girls in my spare time when I'm not drawing cause it's fun, so maybe I'll post some little blurbs sometime if anyone is interested?? Hm. Yeah might do that eventually, we'll have to see.

#i have LOTS of feelings about Team Wish's relationship with Dusknoir and the aftermath of the main story and i need to EXPRESS it #yes... some of Echo's markings match the pathetic man which makes it EVEN WORSE for them both to deal with #for the first few days Sora visibly recoils every time she glances at Echo-- which hurts them both equally even though it's an accident #and when grovyle/celebi/dusknoir return from the future post-game i'm sure you can imagine the shit that goes down #i like to think that they reconcile but dusknoir needs to know that he effed up big time and needs to do some serious apologizing #it's obvious which pic i was the most invested in but i'm not ashamed i like drawing glowy/sparkly stuff #this was also supposed to just be a quick doodle but i went a tiny bit farther than that... i added some color wow #pmd #pmd2 #pmd eos #echo/umbreon #sora/lucario #dusknoir #my art

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susansontag · 1 year

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I refuse to take responsibility for other women’s reactions when they hear my very ordinary, run-of-the-mill thoughts on patriarchal beauty standards lol. it’s not my problem that they feel guilty or morally compromised. I don’t go around shaming women for their individual choices but I won’t lie to appease anyone. not every choice is feminist. quite frankly the fact saying this is deemed controversial reveals the pitiful state of feminist discourse in the general populace. like who in their right mind would raise this charge against marxism

#won't feel apologetic just feeling more confident. never been more proud of my views my level-headedness my compassion #not my problem you're struggling to reconcile your politics and personal choices #moth.txt

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leafyboii · 9 months

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I think what makes asoryuu interesting to me is that Kazuma and Ryunosuke knew each other very little, since they only met one year before the game starts, they knew each other at a very superficial level.

From Kazuma's perspective this is probably the first time in his life where he could finally be around someone without feeling the weight of the 'mission' that ended up consuming his entire life. He can act his age and be silly around Ryunosuke, someone that doesn't know anything about his emotional baggage, and someone he's starting to form an emotional attachment to (and boi does this guy have emotional attachment issues), and he probably wanted to hang onto that for a little longer, hence his hesitation about telling Ryunosuke the truth about why he wanted him to come along to England in the first place.

But from Ryunosuke's perspective it's a little different. At first, he didn't ask a lot of questions (probably out of respect for Kazuma's privacy), he just waited because he trusts Kazuma to explain everything to him whenever he's ready. But then Kazuma 'died' and that was it. There was nothing he could do other than carry out his friend's legacy. And in doing so, he was pretty much creating (and hanging onto) an idealized image of Kazuma: someone who's perfect and noble and who would never do anything Bad. So when he finally gets to see what Kazuma is really like, it was only natural for him to be shocked. He's learning that Kazuma is none of those things, he's realizing that he never really knew him to begin with, and it's a lot for him to process.

It's not out of the question that one of his first thoughts is "maybe I was wrong about him all along, maybe he really did kill Gregson. He lied, after all. Who knows what else he's lying about." Ryunosuke is not an omniscient narrator that knows everything, and Kazuma was already hiding a lot of things from him, it's only natural for him to be suspicious.

I just don't think blind devotion works for their relationship? The last thing Kazuma needs is someone who will agree with him no questions asked and lets him do whatever he wants, what he needs is someone who's not afraid to call him out on his bullshit, someone who will help him stay grounded and level-headed, and that's why he needed Ryunosuke to be there as his rival in Barok's trial. He's the perfect person for this.

In conclusion: this ship makes me insane.

#tgaac spoilers #the great ace attorney #asoryuu #kazuma asogi #ryunosuke naruhodo #this isn't meant to be a professional analysis! these are some of my early impressions and things i found interesting about their dynamic #there's a lot they both need to reconcile about themselves and about each other #and kazuma entrusting his sword (ahem- i mean his soul) to ryunosuke is the beginning of that #it's like a promise #i want to put them both in a microwave and watch them explode #sorry for the long post! i just have a lot of feelings about those two #leafyboii

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hiraganasakura · 5 months

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Hi so me being me I've decided to hyperanalyze the conversation Qrow and Raven had in Higanbana practically line by line bcus I have Many Thoughts and this is the best way I can think of to get them all out. If you can't tell I'm absolutely obsessed with these two. Btw.

Thanks to the RWBY wiki for providing transcripts for every episode, otherwise I definitely would have missed smth despite having just watched this scene recently lol

I put it under the read more for easier scrolling due to how long this post got!

I immediately noticed smth in the very first lines of the interaction:

Raven: "Hello, brother." Qrow: "...Raven."

You'll notice throughout the whole conversation that Raven never calls Qrow by his name, only condescendingly referring to him as "brother" this one time and never calling him anything else. Meanwhile, Qrow directly refers to Raven a total of three times throughout the conversation, and only one doesn't call Raven by her name (which we'll get to shortly)

On the other hand, Qrow doesn't bother with even so much as a greeting beyond simply stating Raven's name

It's different ways of communicating their distance. While Raven holds her relationship with Qrow over his head — never once, even outside of this scene, does she call him "brother" with affection iirc, only derision and condescension — Qrow doesn't seem to rly know how to greet her. He hesitates before saying her name and approaching her, as if trying to assess the situation before acting

Qrow: "So, what do you want?" Raven: "A girl can't just catch up with her family?" Qrow: "She can, but you're not. Now how 'bout we get on with it? Unless you plan on keeping these [drinks] comin'."

Again, Raven seems to bring up her familial ties with Qrow as a tactic to get him to do what she wants — in this case, stick around to talk to her despite him not seeming to rly want to. Frankly, it feels manipulative. We're gonna put a pin in this for now and come back to it in just a moment

Additionally, Qrow already knows that Raven's not just here for a friendly chat between two siblings, and sees right thru her facade that it is. Raven is here bcus she wants smth from him. But interestingly, it is Raven in V5 that says, in an almost frustrated/disappointed tone, "Family. Only coming around when they need something." There's another pin; keep both in mind

Raven: "Does she have it?" Qrow: "...Did you know Yang lost her arm?" Raven: "That's not—" Qrow: "Rhetorical question, I know you know. It's just obnoxious that you'd bring up family and then carry on like your own daughter doesn't exist." Raven: "I saved her." Qrow: "Once. Because that was your rule, right? Real 'Mom of the Year' material, sis."

Qrow dodges Raven's question about the Relic and instead brings up her hypocrisy in how she treats family. And it's a good point. Here she is lording her siblingship with Qrow over his head while simultaneously defending and upholding her rule that she is only obligated to help her own daughter a single time. Another pinpoint on our little conspiracy board

Also, here's the one time in this conversation Qrow refers to Raven as "sis". Like Raven's use of "brother", Qrow's use of "sis" is very pointed and with intent. But it's not to manipulate Raven, it's a snarky jab meant to rly hammer home Qrow's point

Raven: "I told you Beacon would fall, and it did. I told you Ozpin would fail, and he has. Now you tell me. Does. Salem. Have it?" Qrow: "I thought you weren't interested in all of that." Raven: "I just want to know what we are up against." Qrow: "And which 'we' are you referring to?"

A few things of note here. At some point in the past, Raven expressed an outright disinterest in Ozpin's inner circle, at least to Qrow. Qrow also feels excluded in the "we" Raven mentions being against Salem. To me, there seems to be a distinct possibility here that it wasn't that Raven felt personally disinterested in Ozpin's operations, but that she somehow felt excluded and feigned a lack of interest in order to protect herself. An idea that is further supported in my eyes by the following dialogue:

Qrow: "You should come back, Raven. The only way we'd beat her is by working together. All of us." Raven: "You're the one who left. The tribe raised us, and you turned your back on them." Qrow: "They were killers and thieves." Raven: "They were your family." Qrow: "You have a very skewed perception of that word."

And there it is. Raven's problem is laid out here for us, loud and clear: She feels like she was the one abandoned, not the one running away. She says it outright! "You're the one who left." To her, Qrow is the traitor, the one who left their family behind. If you ask Qrow (or, for that matter, Tai, Yang, and even Summer based on the scene in V9), it's the opposite

Bcus they have different definitions of family

Another thing to pin (I promise this will all become clear soon)

Raven: "I lead our people now. And as leader, I will do everything in my power to ensure our survival." Qrow: "I saw. The people of Shion saw, too." Raven: "The weak die. The strong live. Those are the rules." Qrow: "Well, you've certainly got someone strong on your side. I've seen the damage." Raven: "We couldn't have known the Grimm would set in as quickly as they did." Qrow: "I'm not talking about the Grimm. And I'm not talking about you, either."

Notice Raven's shift from "the tribe" to "our people". More of that guilt tripping!

Additionally, Raven is *obsessed* with rules. One save. The weak die, the strong live. Raven lives and breathes rules, even seemingly arbitrary ones. Guess what this is? Another pin!

Raven: "If you don't know where the Relic is, then we have nothing left to talk about." Qrow: "I don't know where the Spring Maiden is, either, but if you do, I need you to tell me." Raven: "And why would I do that?" Qrow: "Because without her, we're all going to die." Raven: "...And which 'we' are you referring to?"

Qrow's "either" here implies that he also doesn't know where the Crown of Choice is, which is... interesting. He's one of Ozpin's closest lieutenants, and is in the dark on where Beacon's Relic is? Wherever it is, it is such a closely kept secret that even Ozpin's best spy doesn't know where it is (maybe so that in the event Qrow gets captured by Salem he can't be forced into giving her the information?)

Meanwhile, Raven's "And why would I [tell you]?" implies that she does know who the Spring Maiden is (obviously. Raven's the Spring Maiden lol) but refuses to disclose to Qrow

A lantern sputters out after Qrow says "Without [Spring] we're all going to die." Now, I genuinely can't remember if this is headcanon or canon, but iirc Misfortune seems to act up when Qrow's upset. He's clearly tired of this little game of dancing around topics that Raven's been playing with him

And once again, Raven indicates a feeling of exclusion from Qrow's life in the iconic final line. She gets the final word in before leaving

We've finally reached the end of the conversation. Now what does all of this tell us?

And here is where all of those pins I wrote down are relevant. As I mentioned, the twins view family very differently

Qrow's view is pretty obvious: he views family as the ppl in his life who matter most to him. Unlike Raven, he does not view the tribe as family despite the fact that they raised him, disgustedly referring to them as "killers and thieves". It's implied that he was, in fact, neglected and/or likely abused by the Branwen tribe, saying in V6C4, "No one wanted me... I was cursed..." further explaining his distaste for them. Furthermore, despite not being related to Ruby by blood, they clearly consider one another family throughout the series, and he even seems closer to her than he seems to his niece who's actually blood related to him (I personally headcanon that he keeps more of a distance from Yang bcus she reminds him too much of Raven, who he feels abandoned and hurt by, but that's neither here nor there). Bloodlines and debts are secondary compared to loyalty, if they're considered at all. He is obviously furious that Raven only insists on saving Yang once and never directly interacting with her beyond that, despite Raven constantly guilting Qrow over abandoning his so-called "family" of the tribe. And yet. And yet. He still offers Raven a place back in his life, even if only to unite against Salem

Raven's view, to me, has been an enigma for a while. But after hyperanalyzing this conversation, after noting down all of those points of interest, I feel like I've finally cracked the code. Raven views family as an obligation, an exchange that always has an ulterior motive behind it. She seeks out Qrow only bcus she desires smth from him despite showing distaste when someone does the same to her; condescendingly calls Qrow "brother" more than his actual name and calls the tribe their "family" to try guilting him into doing what she wants; and feels fierce loyalty to the tribe but barely interacts with her daughter, only seeming to count one of the two as true family. She views the concept of family with cynicism and seems to feel an obligation to the tribe, as if she "owes" them for raising her

I think the two's perceptions of what defines family are all to do with the way the tribe treated both of them. This crosses a bit into headcanon territory, but as you can see by the above quotes and analysis, I rly don't think I'm just making it up entirely

As I already mentioned, I think it's implied that the Branwen tribe neglected/abused Qrow. In fact, we could probably blame their treatment of him for the deep self-loathing he has due to his "cursed" Semblance. But what about Raven?

Well, it's simple: I think she was abused, too, just in a different way. While Qrow was likely shown and told on a consistent basis that he was unwanted, unloved, undeserving of good things, Raven may have been shown and told she was wanted, loved, and deserving of good things... if she did what the tribe told her. If she repaid them for raising her and her brother, for being her "family". The way she uses her familial ties with Qrow as almost blackmail may be exactly the way the tribe treated her. Her obsession with following rules may stem from the fact that she had to follow the rules the tribe set for her in order to be accepted and deemed worth smth

As for her distance from Yang... honestly, I wonder if Raven is aware that Yang deserves better and keeps her distance as her way of doing that. When Summer confronts Raven in the V9 scene, Raven says, "...You're better at that life. Better than I was." She seems to have a fear and insecurity about being a good family member, a good mother, and maybe that's why she fled. Maybe she was scared of being like her abusers due to how she emulates them as a self-preservation tactic in so many other ways. Not entirely sure about this point tho

And I think too this is why the twins don't rly understand one another. They may have been unaware of the different ways in which the other was treated. Qrow, constantly unwanted and loathed, can't understand why Raven sticks around with the tribe; Raven, who obeyed the tribe and, in doing so, garnered enough of their favor to even eventually become leader, can't understand why Qrow can't just be "good", earn respect, and stay

This dissonance between the two experiences may also be completely intentional on the part of the tribe; abusers will often eliminate their targets' support systems in order to make them completely reliant on the abuser, so it's highly likely that the wedge was intentionally driven between the two siblings so that they could not find support in one another. This would also tie into why the twins seem to feel excluded from one another's lives and abandoned by one another: bcus they were made to feel that way by their common abusers, and did nothing to challenge these assumptions bcus they saw no reason to — and only seemed to keep proving one another right if they did

Which rly has some disturbing implications about how the Branwen tribe works. Like, do they just pick orphaned kids up off the street and abuse them into being perfect little bandits, molded to be of the greatest possible use and discarded if they're deemed worthless? Plus Qrow says his Semblance is how he got his name, which implies that the tribe also renames the kids they scoop up (possibly as a form of control or a way to make sure they can't be tracked down by any remaining family)? Plus there's the whole thing where Qrow and Raven were originally sent to Beacon to learn how to kill Huntsmen, which carries with it the implication that the Branwen tribe grooms literal orphan children into becoming stone-hearted murderers? What. The heck.

And if I'm right, if the Branwen tribe is that severely abusive, then like... wow, no wonder Qrow and Raven are Like That. They're both very deeply hurt people expressing it in different ways

I was considering adding their conversation at the Battle of Haven to this post, but I think that would be better as its own thing. Also I haven't gotten there on my rewatch yet so I may miss some details if I try to analyze it rn; it's better to wait overall methinks

But I have reached the point of my rewatch where we see Weiss and Whitley interact, and I think it would be very efficient to sum up what Qrow and Raven's relationship seems to be by using those siblings as a point of reference. Qrow = Weiss, actively trying to break free from and fight back against their abusers in different ways, while Raven = Whitley, continuing to do as their abusers want and have wanted as a method of self-preservation. Only, unlike Weiss and Whitley, Qrow and Raven have yet to come to a point where they can understand one another. I think that's a good way to briefly summarize the uh. Absolutely massive post this is.

In conclusion, I may have cracked the majority of the Branwen twins' pre-Beacon backstory purely by hyperanalyzing a single conversation. Oopsies

#original post #'hey hira why are you so obsessed with these two—' autism. i hope that answers your question!#ok but srsly. i've genuinely worked rly hard on this post for the past like. 3 days?#i didn't think it'd lead to me deducing all of this about the twins' pasts but here we are lol #this'll probably flop due to the length but like. i don't mind tbh! this is mostly to satisfy my own silly brain [affectionate] anyway #i'm genuinely looking forward to seeing them in v10 #since the storyboard for the scrapped v9 epilogue had raven in it #i hope they somehow reconcile and come to understand one another like weiss and whitley did #tho. i have a bad feeling that even if they do it will end in one (or both?) of them tragically dying before the other's eyes #but that's not rly relevant lol #anyhow i am not sry for inflicting you all with my branwen twin brainrot. it will happen again #i'm having sooo many thoughts on this rewatch and they just keep on coming #rwby #qrow branwen #raven branwen #branwen twins #rwby9 spoilers #i hope there's no glaring errors here. i read thru this post multiple times to be sure but it's so huge i may have missed smth irjnfbpbne

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