if you're not physically disabled pls read this
listen to people when they tell you they need help with something.
listen to people when they tell you they can't do something.
sounds simple right? then DO IT.
i don't always want to explain my disability. i don't always want to tell people i'm disabled. if i tell you i can't do something please listen to me.
yesterday i was painting a wall and there was this weird moving loop thing in the wall. i could reach it with my left hand, but it kept moving and i would need two hands to stabilize it. i can't lift my right arm above my head so i asked someone else to help me move the ladder so i could hold it to paint it.
and when i tell you these people were unintentionally ableist i mean it. "you're short but you're not that short" "you can just hold it" one girl talked to me like i couldn't understand her, going "put your other hand up to hold it, can you do that?" i told her no because i literally cannot and she went "girl" so i just left and let someone else do it because i wouldn't have been able to do it without getting mocked.
yes i could have told her. yes i could have explained. but i didn't want to. i don't think she would have said the same thing if i told her, but able-bodied people have to understand that it's exhausting having to explain to people. especially when they're rude and invasive (even unintentionally!) and sometimes i just don't want people to know i had cancer! i want to pick when to tell people and sometimes people just don't realize that someone who doesn't look disabled can still be disabled.
p. s. i'm not a girl
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I wanna request Tai carrying baby Genya in a baby sling, strapped around the chest. Because Gen-yes you can.
Little did you know, he gets his hairline and lust for watermelon from his hard-working single father (me). He once had my eyebrows as well, but the wild beasts got to him just minutes after he was born ... we don't talk about that.
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burrow’s end ep 2
since this episode & the battle was so heavy on body horror- would anyone be interested in me making a trigger-free episode summary of the recent burrow’s end ep?
it would b like the ones i did for neverafter (see my pinned post) where I just describe the basic beats & bits of the battle for people who didn’t want to watch due to triggers in the battle set/battle content! 
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>> broker chapter update
hi guys! hope you all enjoyed part 1 of the broker chapter :D as i've said before, all of the posts are now tagged with "ch:the broker" so you can always find the chapters there if you missed any, but for convenience i'll list them here as well
the incident
the right hand man
rampage
the interrogation
the revelation
the broker chapter will have 3 more parts after this, all with 4-5 chapters. i'm taking a short break right now (not as if i was posting weekly chapters but let's pretend i was) to properly write part 2 so i have a head start with things once school starts again for me
doesn't mean i won't be online or won't be making new content though! i still have plenty of other projects lying around, both cyberpunk and others, that i'll be working on and sharing with you guys in the meantime :)
as always, if you have any questions about this story (can be about anything!!) you are 100% welcome to jump into my asks! i love talking about my ocs and writing so i'm happy to answer any questions you might have (especially after last chapter's reveal tee hee) :D <3
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[tw: parental death, terminal illness under the cut]
Don't like, worry, or whatever y'all. This is more just me musing and warning to others than anything, just happens to be a sadder one. I'm good in this department nowadays FYI, so please don't worry or anything, but as you can guess you don't really stop missing people.
Pretty sure this was all brought on by simply finding a funny video/meme I think she'd have liked.
It's hard to believe my mom's been gone for almost 2 years now. Like, I had acted as her primary caregiver since 2017 until '21, so it's not like I didn't know what was going to happen. But I still think you can only prepare yourself so much, I guess.
IDK, it's just her birthday wasn't too long ago, and I've had a lot of spare time to sit and ruminate lately.
Seriously guys, whoever's reading this and needs to see it: Don't. Don't fucking smoke. For the love of fucking GOD and every single one of your loved ones, do NOT smoke. You have no idea what you could be putting your family through, let alone YOURSELF once you start losing yourself to full-on COPD.
And I don't say that figuratively. It's not just wheezing, or shortness of breath. It's not that whole "emphysema is like breathing thru a straw" thing. It's not just Asthma But More. The chronic hypoxemia and WILL cause brain damage - you will start to lose your memory, you WILL slowly lose yourself, and so will anyone else that cares for you. And yet, you'll stay completely aware of what's happening well after it's too late to turn around.
I watched her die for years. I was holding her fucking hand when she took her last god damned, struggling breath. I can't think of a worse way to do die.
You'll stop caring about anything other than surviving. And the sad part? You will NOT survive. COPD is terminal, no if ands or buts. And if you're banking on it? Goooood fucking luck trying to get approved for a lung transplant as a smoker, cause you're gonna need it.
I don't even WANT to get into the details - but let's just say it takes a good amount of therapy to even be able to deal with it firsthand.
Like, I know this probably won't change any minds, gods know it didn't get me to kick the habit until she'd passed. I get it, it's how addiction works. It's not some "well just quit then" bullshit. And I'll be real with you - you'll probably still have occasional cravings for years afterward. But just maybe I can be that last straw for someone out there who actually wants to try.
Because fuck man, it's worth it. If not for you, your loved ones. It's so fucking worth it. Even if you don't give a shit about yourself, think about those you care for. Please.
Anywho, there's my oddly personal, likely wine-fueled, bit of advice/ramble.
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I let myself become so so boring in an attempt to be accepted and respected by people who will never do either of those things and now I’m in a new place with new people who did not know me as i was before i made myself small and acceptable and quiet and dull and it’s going to seem strange to them if i suddenly stop being that. Not wanting to look like a crazy person by suddenly completely changing vs the constant struggle of suppressing and hiding everything about myself that makes me me in an attempt to gain acceptance I’ll never truly get: GO
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direct help for two Palestinians in Gaza who are in need of urgent medical attention
Hi all, I am posting on behalf of my beloved friend's acquaintance, who is doing a gofundme to help her two surviving sisters; Both of whom are gravely injured. This is a gofundme to help two women leave Gaza and enter Egypt to receive necessary medical attention.
I have a platform here on tumblr with a stable following, and it would be incredible if we could somehow get this page to trend, because rn, They need 30k euro to both leave Gaza and receive treatment in Egypt, and as of January 6, 2024 the donations have only amounted to 400 or so euro.
english text from the page:
During the war in Gaza, our family's house was subjected to bombing and destruction, resulting in the tragic loss of my father, brother, and his daughter. Additionally, my sisters, Duaa and Dina, sustained serious injuries. Unfortunately, the necessary medical treatment is not available in Gaza, so we need your assistance to transport them to Cairo for treatment.
The cost of leaving Gaza and securing the required medical treatment is approximately 30,000 euros. We all hope for your response and support to save their lives.
If you see this, PLEASE rb! I'm anxious that tumblr will hide this post, when the more people who see this post, the more help we can get! Thank you so much, everyone!!
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