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jksprincess10 · 1 year

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Rooting for the antihero || Joel Miller x reader

Summary: You and your “business” partner, Joel, go out of the QZ for a deal. Everything goes to shit and feelings are revealed.

CW: graphic violence, age gap, graphic sex

It should’ve been so fucking simple. In and out of the QZ. Two days tops. Get the drugs and leave. But, of course, things had to go sideways. Since you had teamed up with Joel, your life was hectic. But what was worse between loosing everyone at 18 and or living life dangerously at 28, 10 years after everything happened. You had frankly not much left to live for. So, you did what you could to survive, putting your life on the line when necessary to get more resources.

You started working with him a few months ago – you don’t remember how long, you were starting to lose track of time. He was a middle-aged man of few words. He barely looked at you when you were together, as your big eyes were always on him and on his next moves. He had killed a lot of people for the right or the wrong reasons – but you told yourself that you were always someone’s hero while being another person’s enemy. Also, he needed you and you needed him. He didn’t like to admit it, but he was getting older, and it was harder and harder for him to follow up with his tasks. His legs didn’t work as well, his back hurt more. He was loud, all guns and fire. But you were stealthier, quieter. People called you “Ghost girl”. And those who didn’t know you underestimated you. You were small, bright eyed, but heartless when necessary.

You went out of the walls in the middle of the night, without any incident. You were getting used to it and less scared of what was outside – because sometimes, yes, what was inside was much worse. Once safe in the middle of the trees outside of the QZ, you set up camp in an abandoned cabin, the one where you always stayed. But you couldn’t sleep, so you insisted on taking first watch. Joel grumbled and “went to sleep”, but you knew he wasn’t sleeping. When he was really sleeping, he would mumble and toss and turn. He had his past demons and you did too. But you never talked about it. There was the unwritten rule of silence between you. No past, only forward. You sat at the window, shotgun between your legs and knife between your closed teeth. You read a stupid romance book (you had found a great stack here) to keep you busy and awake, stopping every page to make sure nothing was moving in the woods.

Hours went by and your turn was over. That book almost put you to sleep, so you were thankful when it was Joel’s turn.

“Your turn, old man. Should be quiet though. Left you a romance book if that’s your thing.”

You shook his body, before taking his spot on the decrepit mattress. He grumbled something you ignored as you went to sleep quietly.

The next day, you kept hiking towards the meeting spot you had with your outside contact. You had the book in your hands and were reading pages aloud as you walked, only to annoy Joel. It was amusing to you – how he rolled his eyes and did his best to ignore you, but sometimes, you’d catch a smile, you’d see the wrinkles near his eyes get more pronounced. You never said anything about it. You didn’t share anything besides comradery, annoyance, and loyalty. But… deep down, there was always something else. Yes. But you’d blame it on your loneliness and the fact that the apocalypse kept you from a real relationship. And he’d blame it on the lack of partnership since his past wife died.

You entered a village you thought was abandoned. It was, before yes. The cars had stopped moving long ago and everything was covered in dust. But this time, something was off.

“Wait, quiet.” You whispered.

You hid just in time behind a car while shots started to get fired in your direction.

“Fuck.” Muttered your partner.

He reloaded his gun and got up momentarily to shoot in the direction of your newly found enemies.

“Give us your stuff and we’ll let you leave.” shouted one of the men.

“Bullshit.” You whispered to yourself.

They didn’t know there were two of you, so you had an advantage over them. You went slowly and quietly between the cars, knives in hands, gun on your hip. You snuck behind one of them and sliced his throat from behind. He fell heavily on the ground. There were three more, distracted by Joel who kept shooting in their direction.

“Aren’t you a pretty little thing – ” Suddenly, one of the other men noticed you and grabbed on your arm as you buried one of your knives in his gut. He pointed his gun towards you, but Joel thankfully had your back.

“You fucking bitch.” He groaned in pain as he let go of the gun and you kicked it away. But, just as Joel had backup, they also had another man waiting for the right moment. He put his arm around your throat as the two men left towered over you. One of them punched you in the face and you dropped your knives under the impact. You thought everything was over because of your recklessness. You should’ve gone up the buildings and surprise them from the sky as you jumped on them like a sky ballerina. But finally, Joel got out of his hiding spot and shot two of the men in the legs. The last one, you kicked him in the nuts before smashing his face under your foot.

“Fucking assholes.” He seemed so pissed, but you couldn’t figure out why. He would never be as mad in combat; it was something you experienced quite frequently. But this one was a close call with you, and he felt like he had let you down.

The two men that were shot in the legs by Joel were laying on the ground and pleading for their lives. To keep them quiet, he shot them both in the face, gore and blood marking the grounds of the city. And they were quiet forever. There was still a problem left… why were you attracted by the fact that he protected you? You blamed it on the adrenaline and your ever-lasting attraction to him that you tried to ignore.

“Y’okay?” He asked in a southern accent as he finally looked at you, hand hovering over your bruised cheek without actually touching you. You saw the glimpse of an emotion – worry – in his eyes.

“Yeah, it’s nothing. We better get the fuck away from here now.” It wasn’t nothing, your cheek was quite blue, but you couldn’t afford to stay in one spot right now.

There was more movement – not human this time. Infected. Joel’s first instinct was to get into one of the cars, hoping it would start and have just a bit of fuel. You jumped in the backseat after shooting a few of the mushroom-driven humans. You two couldn’t drive forever though, even though you managed to get a few shots here and there.

“We have to crash the car into water. They can’t cross.” You shouted between shots.

You knew there was a lake close, you had crossed it a few times. And luckily, you did find the lake. The car sunk slowly in the water as you two got out of the vehicle. The runners seemed to give up and turned around to find an easier prey.

On the other side was a deep forest and you knew had made a huge detour. It would take you probably two more days to get to your destination. You didn’t have enough supplies to last that long.

“Let’s try to cross the forest and find a place to establish camp before the sunset.” Joel was always thinking of solutions, and you knew it was the only realistic path.

The forest seemed endless as you two walked for hours. You found another body of water and took the time to wash yourselves, not looking at each other as you were letting the cold water caress your bodies. You walked more after that, but the sun was getting lower and lower, so you decided to stop. There were a few big rocks where you could hide and enough trees to start a fire and no one seeing the smoke. So, you stopped, sore and angry. You silently got a fire started as Joel found something more consistent to eat. The flames brought warmth and light to your faces as you munched on pieces of cooked rabbit. Something was bothering you and you had to talk.

“Joel?”

“Hm?” He didn’t even look at you.

“Were you actually worried for me back there?”

He stayed silent which angered you. You didn’t know why. But you wished he spoke more.

“Y’know, I can defend myself.” You added to make him react.

“Look, you need me, and I need you. And I fucked up back there. I’m… sorry.” He shot back.

You felt a weird sensation as he said that he needed you, but you tried to ignore it.

“Now get some fucking sleep kid and I’ll take first watch.”

You hated when he called you kid but you didn’t argue. You thought he never saw you as a woman and only saw your younger age. But God - did he see you as a woman. He couldn’t look at you without bursting into flames of desire. So, he didn’t look. Didn’t speak. It was better that way. No attachments. If you died, he would still have his life. He couldn’t afford to get attached to someone he would eventually lose.

“Fine, old fuck.” You mumbled as you tried to get comfortable in your sleeping-bag. It was getting more comfortable – sleeping anywhere. It was the only way you could get any sleep, without the past luxury of a cozy bed. So, it was that or go crazy from sleep deprivation. You drifted to sleep under the protection of the trees.

It had been a while, but you had a dream. You saw Joel and you, same scene from before. Getting attacked from every angle. But this time, when he saved you, you kissed him – and more, taking him into an abandoned building to thank him properly. You woke up soon after that, heat rising between your legs. It had been a long time. You didn’t even take the time to take care of yourself. You moved and sat up. He turned to you, looking more annoyed than anything that you were awake. You knew what you wanted, but you didn’t know if you dared to ask him. You crawled a few meters to him, took the gun out of his hands, putting it aside. He looked at you with question marks in his brown eyes as you cradled his lap. He was a scared animal, not touching you and having a hard time to look at you. Your bodies never were so close, and you felt everything.

“You protecting me… and killing those guys…” You started.

Your delicate fingers grazed his salt and pepper beard. You felt like he finally saw you, but you didn’t know that he always did see you.

“It was insanely hot, so you don’t have to be sorry. And I need you. More than this. Please.”

You felt strong hands grabbing your waist, sending electricity through your whole body. He never touched you, except by accident. He was always keeping his distances, but you made him drop his walls. Tension was high as you leaned into him to touch his lips with yours. You felt the relief of his body, like he finally had the moment he had waited for. Your hands grabbed his face as you deepened the kiss, tongues exploring each other’s mouths. You were hungry for friction, touch deprived as your hips moved against his.

“Sweet, sweet girl…” he moaned against your mouth. “Been dreaming of this since I first met you.” He left a trail of kisses on your neck, sometimes biting your skin. “Didn’t think you’d want me too…And was scared to lose you…”

He never talked, but now, he couldn’t shut his mouth. An amused grin on your lips, you undid the buttons of his plaid shirt, hands finding warm skin in the dark. You could only see glimpses of him under the dying fire. He held his breath in his throat. It was ridiculous how hard he was already, and you felt his growing bulge against your thigh. You undid his belt and unzipped his pants to give him some relief and he sighed as you grabbed his throbbing member and pulled it out of his jeans. You could feel how big and heavy he felt in your delicate hand. You gave it a few strong strokes as he was falling apart under you, mouth opened and no sound coming out of it.

“Been so fucking long…” You shushed him with an open-mouthed kiss. One of his big hands found its way under your hole-filled t-shirt and grabbed on one of your breasts. You hitched a breath and with his other hand, he pulled his member out of your closed hand. “Le’mme take care of you, please.” He begged.

You nodded enthusiastically as he undid your pants, hand meeting your aroused heat under the fabric. You were already moving against him, desperate for friction.

“Be patient, sweet girl.” He asked as he stopped you from moving with his hand going down from your breasts to your hips. “I’ll give you everything you want.” As he said that, one of his fingers found its way toy our entrance. Soon, another one stretched you out more for him. You were already so tight, wet, and warm around his digits, he couldn’t imagine what you’d feel like on his cock.

“Please Joel, I want your dick inside, please, please.”

He groaned under your pleading tone, before exchanging your positions, your back settling on his sleeping bag. He completely took off the bottom layers that were separating you two. Your hands came up to tug on his brown and grey curls to hungrily meet his lips. As you were distracted by his hungry mouth, he opened your thighs and met your entrance with his cock sleeked with precum. He let go of your mouth to look at you, making sure you were okay. You were already a mess under him. He lifted your shirt to hold on your breasts, slowly starting to move between your walls. It hurt at first – it had been so long, but pain slowly became pleasure. You moved your hips against his, as one of his fingers did lazy circles on your clit. He couldn’t do everything all at once, his age was slowly getting to him. So, as he was moving too slow for you, you flipped him on his back and took care of things, riding him as he could concentrate on stimulating you on the outside.

“Such a good girl.” He praised.

You were slowly coming undone on top of him, your movements hiccupping as your orgasm took over you. His fingers followed as you moaned his name.

“M’gonna cum too, sweet girl…” His lips met yours as he fucked harder into you, stopping you from moving and fucking you dumb. You had stopped moving since your orgasm and were a moaning mess for him.

“Cum in me, please.”

That was all it took to send him over the edge, warm liquid shooting into you as he kept bucking up his hips. You fell from on top of him, laying on the ground as his liquid dripped deliciously down your thighs.

He turned to meet your gaze, hands cupping your face to kiss you. This time, it wasn’t as hungry, it was lazy and loving.

“Hoping I fuck up more if it’s the outcome.” He said as he laughed. You never heard his laugh and it made you smile.

“Well, just don’t get me killed.”

You were, in the end, glad it took more time to get to your destination.

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