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safarigirlsp · 7 months

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Wicked Fairytales

My fun little series in which I give my own twisted twist on some classics.

Bah Humbug

Flip Zimmerman x Reader

Kylo Ren x Reader

Charlie Barber x Reader

Clyde Logan x Reader

Henry McHenry x Reader

Jacques Le Gris x Reader

Commander Mills x Reader

Word Count: 35.4k

Warnings: NSFW. Extra Smut. Language. Angst. Romance. Graphic Violence. Murder. Main Character Death. Light Violence Against Reader. Old Timey Sexism. Bastardization of Classic Literature.

AO3 Link

Based on A Christmas Carol

A Comedy of Eros

Jacques Le Gris x Reader

Word Count: 13.5k

Warnings: NSFW. Humor. Romance. Soulmates. Violence. Non-Con Elements. Physical Aggression Toward Reader. Possessive and Jealous Behavior. Dominant Men. Bitchy Women. Conniving Wizards. Drugging - Kids today might call it Sex Pollen. Confusion. Duplicity. Bestiality. Orgies. Cuckolding. Exhibitionism. Misogyny. Old Timey Sexism. Toxic Men. Jacques/Pierre Canon as Developed by Silky and Myself aka Shithead Behavior. Bastardization of Shakesperean Tropes. Misuse of Shakespearean Quotes, try to count them all. Fear Not, No Attempts at Ye Olde English Contained Herein. ☠️Rey☠️

Don’t let the warnings scare you! This is Romance and Comedy.

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Based on A Midsummer Night's Dream

Outrun the Devil

Lawyer Kylo Ren x Reader

Word Count: 14.9k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Blood. Gore. Murder. Beheadings. Supernatural Themes. Romance.

AO3 Link

Based on The Legend of Sleepy Hollow.

Love & War

Regency Kylo Ren x Reader

Word Count: 15.5k

Warnings: NSFW. Language. Smut. Non-Graphic Mentions of Violence and Death. Old Timey Sexism. Fluff. Romance. Humor. Stilted Language.

AO3 Link

Admiral Ren in Love

Top notes of Pride & Prejudice with undertones of Cinderella.

The Beast

Vampire Kylo Ren x Reader

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: None! Shocking! Some light horror and sexy themes.

AO3 Link

Notes of Beauty and the Beast, Dracula, and The Raven in my best Poe-ish attempt.

Music of the Night

Victorian Kylo Ren x Reader

Word Count: 14.4k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Graphic Violence. Fires. Guns. Murder. Old Timey Sexism. Romance. Dark Phantom of the Opera Vibes. Victorian Kylo.

AO3 Link

Based on The Phantom of the Opera

Here There Be Monsters

Pirate Captain Jacques Le Gris x Reader

Word Count: 51.4k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Action. Adventure. Romance. Light Violence. Swords. Guns. Orgies. Bar Fights. Pirate Shenanigans. Old Timey Sexism.

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This is the result of my love for Pirates of the Caribbean. Yes, it's a classic.

Maneater

Commander Mills x Lawyer Reader

Word Count: 37.5k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Violence. Blood. Gore. Graphic Dinosaur Violence. Enemies to Lovers. Idiots in Love. Sexism in Survival Situations. Hot Toxic Masculinity. Character Crossovers. The Commander Mills Jurassic Park AU that had to happen.

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Mixing two of my favorites together for a fun AU - Commander Mills and Jurassic Park! Yes, it's a classic.

Ghost Town

Gunfighter Flip Zimmerman x Reader

Word Count: 14k

AO3 Link

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Alcohol. Graphic Violence. Gun Violence. Lots of Violence. Horror Themes. Possession Themes. Supernatural Themes. Shameless References to The Shining. This is a Darker take on Flip than I usually write, but it’s Halloween!

Inspired by the Seven Deadly Sins.

Everything A Big Bad Wolf Could Want

Word Count: 5.2k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Fluff. Language. Chasing kink. Primal Play. If there’s such a thing as Lumberjack kink, it’s in here. Extreme bastardization of fairy tale dialogue.

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If I were Little Red Riding Hood...

Cinderella

Kylo Ren x Reader

HCs Only

Word Count: 1k

Warnings: NSFW. Language. Light Smut. Fluff. Happy Murder Thoughts. Humor.

Cinderella Themes.

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barbwritesstuff · 11 days

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I really love your books and was wondering when thicker than finish, what would you like to write after it? Would it be about supernatural again? Or something else?

I love writing urban fantasy and scifi. eg, werewolves, superheroes, and sentient space ships. High fantasy (with old timey stuff) is a little tricker for me, but I dabble a wee bit.

I'm in the very early stages of writing a non-interactive scifi about time travel (it features dinosaurs), and I also want to write an urban fantasy (probably not in the world of Blood Moon/Thicker Than) about fairies. Eg, the otherworldly beings of trailer park lot 44B, or something.

But I don't know. I don't know where my inspiration will take me. It might be in these directions, or a new idea my swoop in and carry me off. I write as a way to process my life and the world around me, so it's something I'll keep doing for as long as I'm able, but also something that can be quite unpredictable.

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nocountryforiguanodon · 2 months

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I want to share one of my favorite awkward Megalosaurus reconstructions that I've nicknamed Daddy Longlegs. This Neave Parker-inspired (to put it kindly) illustration was drawn by Barry Driscoll, and unless I'm mistaken this scan is originally from Love in the Time of Chasmosaurs, the premier blog for old-timey dinosaur books.

#vintage paleoart #megalosaurus #awkward #look at him go #boy got dem legs

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extrashortshorts · 10 months

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Ok PLEASE do not feel pressured to draw this I’m just super curious how you would incorporate the giants into your animal au, like are they Clifford the Big Red Dog situations and just normal animals but super big? OR are they like megafauna like giant ground sloths and stuff?

My first through was to make them all dinosaurs, a lot of giants gave off that old timey atmosphere since first island with Dorry and Brogy.

But

seeing a ginormous duck would be more interesting, so Clifford situation is more appealing to me personally

#one piece #words

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nyaskitten · 1 year

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I’m losing my mind, I was getting photos of the serpentine war for random reasons and I realized

Mystake has a hoodie in this

This is like ninjago’s versions of medieval times or something, everyone is wearing old timey armor, dinosaurs are probably still alive, and here’s this old ass lady with a modern day hoodie like 😭😭😭 did she make it herself?

HSHDSIAIODEHDEHODSE grandma INVENTED the drip

#ninjago #asks #hiddensneker #raine's shitposting

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gizm0-gadgetz · 10 months

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Love agent rainbow, best antagonist

But like

Why does he walk the way he does

Man walks like a dinosaur

Or an old timey cartoon villian

Or a drag queen

He became a lot less scary when i realised he walks like that

#gizm0 #gizm0 rambles #in sound mind agent rainbow #agent rainbow

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a-dinosaur-a-day · 8 months

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wait people vehemently disagree that birds are dinosaurs? i've known this forever. so long that i wondered why the dinos in jurassic park didn't have feathers. they moved like birds and they were basically old timey birds, so where were their feathers, little me wondered. (still absolutely love JP. iirc they consulted actual paleontologists how the bones went together and how they thought they'd move, and when they got to the t-rex someone on set went, "wait. i've seen this before," and got a video of a chicken walking. like the production of the movie helped advance our understanding of dinosaurs and i think that is SO neat. also it influenced the way i say dinosaur.)

i went off on a tangent. whoops. i really like dinosaurs (and pterodons and all sorts of other prehistoric life). i think they're super neat and i wish i could gently kiss a microraptor on the head.

jurassic park even SAYS birds are dinosaurs multiple times! like!!!!!!!!!!!!!! stop the madness!

anyways birds are SUCH dinosaurs that we legitimately can't figure out when Bird Starts in the dinosaur family tree

prehistoric life in general is amazing though

#birds #dinosaurs #birds are dinosaurs

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safarigirlsp · 8 months

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2022 Halloween & Horror Fic Recap

✨🍁🐈‍⬛🎃💛✨

Live Deliciously

Salem Jacques Le Gris x Witch Reader

Word Count: 23.5k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Horror Themes. Dark Themes. Graphic Violence. Gruesome Horror. Gore. Guns. Hanging. Burning at the Stake. Old Timey Sexism. Black Magic. Good Times with Witchcraft. Revenge Through Witchcraft. Violence Against Women and Men, but They Deserve It. Light Violence Against Reader. Canon-Consistent Rape, Not by Jacques and Not of Reader. Half-Assed Puritan Values. Virgin Reader. ☠️ Margeurite ☠️

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The Case of the Colorado Cannibal

Flip Zimmerman x Lawyer Reader

Word Count: 18.4k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Horror. Action. Violence. Gore. Graphic Violence. Lots of everything aforementioned. Very Horror and Action Oriented.

AO3 Link

Music of the Night

Victorian Kylo Ren x Reader

Word Count: 14.4k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Graphic Violence. Fires. Guns. Murder. Old Timey Sexism. Romance. Dark Phantom of the Opera Vibes. Victorian Kylo.

AO3 Link

The Devil Went Down To Dodge City

Gunfighter Flip Zimmerman x Devil OC

Word Count: 12k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Horror Themes. Violence. Gore. Guns. Old Timey Sexism. Western. Devil Shenanigans. ☠️ Rey ☠️

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The Beast

Vampire Kylo Ren x Reader

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: None! Shocking! Some light horror and sexy themes.

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Amateur Hour

Flip Zimmerman x Reader

Word Count: 5.4k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Action. Horror Themes. Murder. Graphic Violence. Knife Violence. Axe Violence. Gore.

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Make A Wish

Vampire Jacques Le Gris x Vampire Hunter Reader

Word Count: 14.5k

Warnings: NSFW. Smut. Horror. Adventure. Graphic Violence. Blood & Gore. Humor. Romance. Sexism. Bromance. Campy Bullshit. B-Movie Style Monster Crossovers. Vampires. Djinn. Nietzche. Violence Against Women and Children, but They’re Monsters and They Deserve it.

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Maneater

Commander Mills x Lawyer Reader

Word Count: 37.5k

AO3 Link

#my stuff!#my writing #best #fic #halloween #jacques le gris x you #jacques le gris x reader #flip zimmerman x reader #flip zimmerman x you #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x you #gunfighter!flip #commander mills x reader #commander mills x you

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cjwelford · 11 months

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location: the green dragon

status: closed for @rachelhargrove

CJ was waiting for Jeanie to finish her shift, mainly because Professor Murderclaws had gotten into his room again (because he may have forgotten to shut the door...again) and he couldn't risk getting in there to fetch the cat without an allergy flare up. With the only rule to not eat the baked goods in the display counter, he just hung around as she worked. "Hey there, welcome to The Green Dragon!" He called from where he was leaning against the counter. "D'ya think old timey people mixed dragons and dinosaurs up...or were they like different breeds? Like how labradors are different to, like, spaniels?"

#rachelhargrove

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majingojira · 11 months

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What are the most popular Paleo Documentaries?

This question recently hit me due to a talk on Twitter, so I thought I'd look through all the documentaries I've seen and reviewed/logged and try and determine what, roughly were the most popular documentaries for their time periods and what made them so popular.

First, let's go through the "Dark Ages" of Paleo Docs -- past the silent era, and into the talkies/early color stuff. Back when dinosaurs were thought of as evolutionary failures.

Before the Dinosaur Renaissance, there are very few documentaries (32 between 1919 and 1979, 1 of which is just lost, and 4 of which have no archived digital version), so being notable doesn't require as much.

There are documentaries from the silent era, and most of them are... not great. Or at least, rather dull or very short.

Two of them (Prehistoric Animals (1938) and A World is Born (1955)) just recycle footage from The Lost World (1925) and Fantasia (1940). Literally, A World Is Born is just "The Rite of Spring" sequence from Fantasia with narration.

This leaves the 'shorts' Monsters from the Past: The Story of the Great Dinosaurs (1922), Pathé Review: Monsters of the Past (1923), and Fifty Million Years Ago as the only black and white era films of note.

That all are silent films says something about how expensive making dinosaurs is.

Monsters from the Past (1922) is notable for being one of the first documentaries on dinosaurs, possibly the oldest surviving from the United States. Footage from it gets used in a LOT of documentaries to show 'old timey' dinosaur hunting.

Pathé Review is the first documentary to use original stop motion. It's not very good stop motion, but it's good to know how far we've come. Also, it's one of the earliest scenes of Tyrannosaurus rex battling a Triceratops. Only Along the Moonbeam Trail (1918) predates it.

Fifty Million Years Ago is a broader exercise in stop-motion animation showcasing dinosaurs. It also employs cut-out animation for ancient insects. It's the first real animated attempt at showcasing life.

And part of it is missing.

Being a first at something is worth noting in my book. The first actual 'journey through time' style documentary was Uit den Schoot der Aarde/From the Bosom of the Earth (1919) internationally (also, the oldest surviving paleo-doc I know of), and Evolution (1923) (the first American take on it, and one of the longest of its time).

Once things move more to Color in full, things get a little more interesting.

I'd say there are 2.5 of note.

The oldest of them is The Animal World (1956) by director Irwin Allen. This is notable because of 2 things. First, the opening of this documentary on animal life has a prehistoric sequence with special effects from Ray Harryhausen and Willis O'Brien. This sequence went on to be used in other films, including Trog, Americathon, and Odd Jobs. It is also in TV shows like Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea and Married... with Children.

The spread of the dinosaurs in this documentary goes on from there, with close-ups and stills showing up in books, and even a view master slide show (which was featured in Jurassic World).

It's widespread, from a well-known genre creator, featuring the work of two special effects titans. That's read as 'popular' in my book (even if the sequence itself didn't see wider release until the DVD era as a bonus on The Black Scorpion DVD -- today, it's part of the Warner Archive).

The other 'popular' documentary from this time period is Wah Chang's Dinosaurs - The Terrible Lizards (1970). Special Effects technician best known for his work on The Time Machine, The Seven Faces of Dr. Lao, Dinosaurus!, Jack the Giant Killer, and the original Star Trek made this documentary short feature using some of the models used in Land of the Lost.

It also got WIDE redistribution in the 80s and 90s as part of public television broadcast filler and as part of educational VHS tapes.

The ".5" comes from the Horizons documentary episode "The Hot-Blooded Dinosaurs" (1977) for being the first documentary on the Dinosaur Renaissance, and the first appearance of Deinonychus.

That's a pretty important step, and leads us to: the Dinosaur Renaissance proper. This lasts from 1980 through to 1992.

In this time period, I'd suggest that the most popular documentaries were Dinosaur (1980), Dinosaur! (1985), the Gary Owens/Eric Boardman series (Dinosaurs (1985), Dinosaurs, Dinosaurs, Dinosaur (1985), More Dinosaurs (1985), Son of Dinosaurs (1988), Prehistoric World (1993), The Return of Dinosaurs (1993)), A&E's Dinosaur (1991), and The Dinosaurs! (1992).

Dinosaur (1980) is a Wil Vinton animated piece and was part of museum theater showings for several decades. The characters of "Herb" and "Rex" would go on to be recurring characters in other Wil Vinton claymation specials, including A Claymation Christmas (1987) and Festival of Claymation (1987).

Dinosaur! (1985) was hosted by Christopher Reeves (an avowed lover of Dinosaurs) and produced by CBS. It began as a short film from Phil Tippet called Prehistoric Beast which got a lot of talk going, leading first to this special, and then to his being hired for Jurassic Park. The effects shots from this special were used in dozens of documentaries, educational CD-roms, and more. It also won a Primetime Emmy for Outstanding Special Visual Effects (beating out Ewoks: The Battle for Endor -- which Phil Tippet also worked on!). It had a VHS release in 1993 and even got re-aired on the Discovery Channel when Christopher Reeves passed in 2004. The Gary Owens/Eric Boardman series of Documentaries on Dinosaurs is so iconic that not only does it have DVD release, but also a soundtrack release. It's that iconic. They were part of the original run of Disney Channel 'we need programming' stuff, and they landed quite well. Of them, only the last, which skews younger, doesn't hold up.

A&E's Dinosaur! (1992) is hosted by Walter Cronkite. Do I really have to elaborate? The puppeteering was decent, but not spectacular. Still, it's a pretty decent documentary bolstered by the host. As many cable prestige pieces, it had a VHS release.

The Dinosaurs! (1992) from PBS was made by my local PBS affiliate (WHYY-TV), and was made available on both VHS and Laserdisc, and even got a reissue in 1998 and 1999. That's a solid run for a PBS documentary! The animated segments, which are immaculate, were all done in pencils and were featured in museums (like the Swedish Museum of Natural History), CD-Rom games, and more. The documentaries hold up very well bolstered by the animation.

In 1993 came Jurassic Park, upending pop culture's perceptions of Dinosaurs. This lead to TLC producing Paleoworld (known as Jurassica! in Europe). There were such a glut of Dinosaur Documentaries that people had to do a LOT to get one to stand out from the crowd.

And few did.

Part of this was due to man of the documentaries being part of documentary series. From Bill Nye the Science Guy to Henry's Amazing Animals to National Geographic Explorer, there were a LOT of Dinosaur Documentaries running around in this era. From 1993 through to 1999, there were (counting individual episodes) 124 Paleodocs.

Of these, I'd propose only the following having a lasting impact: The Ultimate Guide: T. rex, Muttaburrasaurus: Life in Gondwana, Nova "The Real Jurassic Park", Once Upon Australia.

The Ultimate Guide got a lot of re-runs, and stop motion effect re-uses throughout the 90s and 2000s. A VHS release was more standard for the time, but still notable.

Muttaburrasaurus and Once Upon Australia are Australian documentary/museum film shorts that have a lot of stop motion animation. They got some air internationally on TLC back in the day when they were actually educational, but that's the limit of their notoriety, beyond the novelty of their focus on Australian paleofauna.

I'm generally reluctant to include episodes of long-running documentary series in this analysis because they are part of long-running documentary series. Still, perhaps because it is such a direct tie-in to Jurassic Park, "The Real Jurassic Park" is a standout since it has actual scientists speculating on the possibility of bringing back dinosaurs AND how handling them in a Zoo-like environment would go. That latter part is still fascinating to listen to. It has a VHS and DVD release. I'm also reasonably certain it's included in some DVD/Blu-Ray releases of JP itself.

But not until Walking with Dinosaurs did the FX used in Jurassic Park become cheap enough for the BBC to use in a miniseries. And that was definitely a game changer, setting a standard going forward for future high budget documentaries.

And stock footage for BBC Horizons to exploit endlessly.

The entire Walking with series and its spinoffs are simply wonderful. Chased by Dinosaurs, Walking with Beasts, Walking with Monsters, Walking with Cavemen, and Sea Monsters. The latter, in particular, is one of the best overall. All of them have DVD releases and Nigel Marvin's work here managed to get him tapped for the video game Prehistoric Kingdom.

Of the hundreds of other documentaries, I'd say only a few standouts: T. Rex Autopsy, Dino Lab, Jurassic CSI, Titanoboa: Monster Snake, and Amazing Dino World.

T. Rex Autopsy has a unique gimmick that makes it memorable, as well as decent reruns.

Dinolab actually had a sequel made to it, and is decent for what it is, gimmick wise.

Jurassic CSI rides the coat tails of trends title-wise, but the host keeps it lively.

Titanoboa covers a unique animal and its ecosystem extremely well.

Amazing Dino World lives and dies by the quality of its FX, really, and those FX are very, very good. Colorful, standout, and FLUFFY! It's not perfect, but it was a good step forward compared to its earlier contemporaries.

Now, I'm being overall rather generous with this. I mean, people also remember Clash of Dinosaurs and Jurassic Fight Club for how annoyingly bad they were.

But those who think those were the worst has never sat through Dino Brained.

Or, for those who love "So Bad it's Good", there's always Dinosaur Quiz.

But this is all just my opinion, what are your thoughts?

Think I missed something? Do you think Dinosaurs: Fun, Facts, and Fantasy deserve a better rap? Or are your nostalgia goggles dipped in The Infinite Voyage's "The Great Dinosaur Hunt"?

#Dinosaur #Dinosaurs #Dinosaur Documentary #Documentary #Analysis

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neos-ultra · 6 months

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too scary! i'm so scared! i'm so scarded that i became scared! let's look at something else pleaseies

AFFIRMATIVE

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-you sit at your computer for a moment. unsure of what's really going on with your moronic friend after the signal cut out, which really shouldn't happen while he was on the net...

-your name is SHO-CO DEVY

-and you are... bored out of your mind! a superhero stopping a bank heist and you can't do anything about it!

-unless...

sho-co: "net-gnome. go to a billboard station thing and like. hack it. with that one image, you know the one."

net-gnome: "OKAY OKAY BOSS BOSS" the bladed gnome scampers across the net, scurrying along buildings full of data and programs as it goes for it's goal.

sho-co: "awesome plan. i'm so badass." you grab your crutch and set off, "HEY MA, DAD, I'M GONNA GO COMMIT CRIMES"

-your mom gives a thumbs up without looking up from her newspaper and keeps smoking her comically large cigar in her old timey gangster goon uniform. "okay have fun!" your dad says as he keeps working to attack rockets to his wheel chair

-and with that, you set out on your mission...

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???: "AWWWWWRROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" you barely dodge another clawed slash in the darkness. the laughter of madame x is thankfully distant by now, but this warehouse is still impossibly massive, and you need to find an exit.

-your name is NEOS ULTRA

-and you are trapped in a warehouse with no lights, Something laughing at you, and something else hunting you. something massive, clawed, and-

???: "AWWWRROOOOOOO BARK BARK BARK-" dog-like. you fire away blindly into the sounds, barely catching a glimpse at it from the sound of your shots, all you see are three purple claws...

neos ultra: "AAHHHHH!!!" you keep running around and screaming, neither style change is a good option here, for this thing you'd need a form focused on high speed ranged attacks! but you simply don't have that... yet.

-you knock over shelves you can barely see, throw everything you can find including a dinosaur skull, and keep running and running. while she just keeps laughing.

-but then, a moment before it slashes once more, brilliance strikes! you call up the battle chips and hope you get the one you're looking for...

neos ultra: "tri-bomber!" you activate it and three blue grenades form in your hands, you start to juggle them around before tossing them all right at the floor! leaping into the air at the same time and with a giant KABOOM you're sent rocketing into the air!

neos ultra: "WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-" you smack face first into a billboard in the middle of town. peeling off it and smacking onto the roof of a nearby building, you look up to see-

what do you think?

-very cool

-what the fuck

#neos ultra

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