#not all of them but some of the things she'll hypothetically say will cause the rest of the gang to look at her like. =_=

[styck-figure]

🕷Dark: Who do you want to have an evil arc? What would happen?

You know who I really want to have an evil arc? Yellow. She's my favorite unhinged scientist /j

I'd like Chosen to have a bit of a villain arc. A complicated one. One that comes from trying to fulfill Dark's legacy. One that comes from being so angry towards Alan, despite everything. One that comes from unresolved plots and pain and so many other little things. An arc that shows just how little we understand The Chosen One.

I want Chosen to choose violence, and learn how to be forgiven for it. (And I want them to realize they can learn how to forgive too, but that they don't have to, either. AVA/AVM is Redemption and Forgiveness The Series, but I'd like to see a slowburn forgiveness or a simple tolerance arc bgjdsksbdgksb).

#ty answers #Honestly though? I do want Yellow and Dark to meet. And I want Yellow to shape Dark to be a better person #but I also want Dark to help Yellow lose some of her morals #not all of them but some of the things she'll hypothetically say will cause the rest of the gang to look at her like. =_= #Every time they actually try to call her out in it she goes “everyone hates a woman in STEM” but does tone it down and. apply ethics. #but it is all hypotheticals and she'd never ACTUALLY do them. They're just fun thought experiments to her.

[cairavende]

My wonderful girlfriend got me Gideon the Ninth for Christmas and I realized why should I just give Worm recaps? Let's read some Locked Tomb! (We'll see how this format works, maybe I'll adjust it. Specifically might break stuff down into smaller segments instead of full acts, but I didn't think of doing this until after I had read all of act 1.)

Gideon the Ninth Act 1 (chapter 1 through 8) thoughts:

This book is so gay oh my god

Like, it's gay in ways I can't even explain. I love it.

Harrow beats the shit out of Gideon in chapter 2 and I don't know if I've ever seen someone get beat up in a more gay way.

"Oh Griddle! But I don't even remember about you most of the time." ROLL A FUCKING DECEPTION CHECK HARROW! You are saying this standing in the middle of the field you spent all night burying bones in just to foil her escape in the most dramatic way. You can't stop remembering her.

Gideon is the most herbo of herbos. I fucking love her. I love reading her PoV. She just knows punch and stab with sword and if those don't work than she'll just do them harder.

Also Gideon is SO fucking gay. Dear god. Dulcinea faints and Gideon turns off all though. HELP PRETTY GIRL. Nothing else.

Ok I could just make this whole thing "EVERYTHING IS GAY" but there is technically more than that.

I love how weird everything is and how little explanation is given. I don't want pages of exposition, I want to learn the world as it comes at me! This is perfect.

And just the very nature of things that seem weird not being given more than a passing thought in the book is information. Something may seem wild to the reader but it's so normalized to the characters that they wouldn't even think about the idea of it being different.

Lack of explanation also helps really show how much of a meathead Gideon is. Do the readers get to learn details about this thing? Only if it is a weapon, has tits, or Gideon is forced to listen while Harrow explains it. Otherwise no, why the fuck would Gideon spend her precious few brain cells on thinking?

And even if Gideon is forced to listen as Harrow explains it, the readers might not learn much cause Gideon might stop listening. I love her.

Aiglamene is wonderful. Crux is fine but I like her more.

Poor Gideon just wants a big sword that she can swing hard. It's not like she can't use a rapier. But why when she can go big sword?

SO MUCH CATHOLICISM

As someone who once was Catholic and then realized I was actually not a straight man, but instead a lesbian, I am in deep.

And the fucking slang used! Or whatever would be the right term. The shit they say! I love it. Just the weird sci-fi far future space necromancer universe and then suddenly "Are you asking me to . . . throw her a bone?", "Gideon had always known that this would be how she went: gangbanged to death by skeletons.", "Don’t hypothetically shove stuff up my butt again, it never does any good.", "Lo! A destructed ass.", "Well we were developing common sense, she studied the blade.", "Double Bones with Doctor Skelebone."

House of the First appears to be Earth. I kinda assume the House of the Ninth is Pluto, even though things obviously aren't in order given that the Seventh and Sixth are closer to the sun. Of course, I'm kinda expecting this to not technically be this solar system at all.

Undying Emperor, King of Resurrection, I Have Ten-Thousand Titles, Boss First, etc etc hasn't been on "Earth" in over nine thousand years. I wanna know MORE.

And the fucking Ninth House has their own prayer! Everyone else has one that the Ninth didn't know and then the Ninth had one that no one else knows! GIMME MORE!!!!

Also again, so many Catholicism metaphors or comparisons or whatever!

I could go on forever but gonna end this one with OH MY GOD SHE FOUND SUNGLASSES I LOVE HER. Fucking "I came prepared, my sweet." and "But then you couldn't have admired . . . these!" as she whips on the sunglasses. God. I nearly died.

#The Locked Tomb #tlt #Gideon the Ninth #Cairavende reads The Locked Tomb #Gideon Nav #Harrowhark Nonagesimus #Dulcinea Septimus #This might be the most lesbian thing I've ever read and I've read some pretty fucking lesbian things #Dulcinea might be my favorite so far

[flowersandbigteeth]

Which monsters of yours would freely give their credit card to their darlings, no questions asked vs. the monsters that’d ask for a “favor” of some type in return?

And then which monsters would just say “no” to me, and leave me crying cause I wanted a new Sanrio plushie?

This is such a cute question, I love it! Answers below:

First, in the hypothetical situation where he appears magically in our world, Golmad is going to tell you "no" to Sanrio plushies. Not because he is worried about money, but because badass Orc Queens don't carry around adorable plushies, they carry weapons. He'd suggest a nice mace or a whip in the color pink. However, after he sees your pouty eyes, that plush is going to mysteriously appear in your bedroom with a mini axe strapped to its back.

After your "adjustment" period is over, Roth is issuing you your own card and sending you on elaborate shopping trips with the club girls. The caveat is you have to give him a personal fashion show when you get back to show off the clothes you bought.

Leander is pretty sure spending money is your primary job and has contacted the bank to let them know you are authorized to withdraw however much you like. Every shop owner in town adores when you come in because they know you are dropping serious cash.

Serge will demand favors in a big way. He'll make you call him pet names and give him smooches in return for whatever you like. He will also trade treats for self-care. Brushing your teeth or showering yourself will result in cash prizes! Money isn't an issue, but he's not giving you the credit card because it's so much more fun to extract concessions for his whims.

Idreod has no problem with issuing you your own card, but you're in charge of the budget anyway, so you already know the balances and whatnot. His only stipulation is that whatever you buy better be high end. His wife has to look a certain way so people know she's above them.

With Vylkas the situation is switched. It's you giving him your credit card. Of course, you have to give him a card with a limit because he has no common sense and will spend all his money on cigarettes and decorations for his murder pond.

Hugo will bicker with you about spending money on frivolous things, but always gives in eventually. He'll pout when you buy designer clothes or plushies, but quietly build you a new shelf to store them or expand your closet to fit the new clothes. He'll tell you it's so he can add photos of whatever he built to his portfolio to draw new customers and earn back all the money you're spending, but you notice he is very careful with your new stuff (picking up and arranging your plushies if you leave them out or hanging up your dresses if you toss them on the floor) and asks you to wear things he likes for him or asks if you want him to grab your plushie while you're watching movies.

Rafe is the worst. He's happy to buy you what you like, but he demands lots of naughty favors in return. Extortion is his favorite bedroom game.

Chase also likes to be in control of the money, but he's more playful when he shakes you down. He likes to come shopping with you so he can demand kisses for him to swipe his card. He likes showing off to people that you're his and especially likes to make the other shoppers jealous, spending lots of money on you. He's a bit of a terror in the store. If a shop worker appears to be flirting with you, he'll make their life extra hard, demanding they run around getting all sorts of things you have no intention of buying. He's also very picky about the things you buy. He wants you to look like a cute little housewife, so very few pants unless they are leggings that show off your figure. He's perfectly happy to buy you plushies or other cute stuff, but practical things are a no-no. Why do you need a drill? He will do all of that hard stuff so his pretty little wife doesn't break a nail.

Lethia loves shopping and terrorizing you with naughty games. She'll demand you try on all sorts of revealing lingerie and racy outfits just to watch you squirm and blush in them. She doesn't see any reason for you to have "normal" clothes, but other than that, she'll buy you whatever else you want for a kiss. Her little pet has to look fabulous at her side so she'll take you to get your nails done with the most elaborate sets, hair dyed in mermaid or candy colors, and whatever other pampering you didn't know you needed. If she finds out you like plushies, you'll be buried in them. She'll have alerts on her phone for the latest drops, so you get the newest ones.

Once Nasos gets used to you not being a sleeve, shopping with you is his second favorite activity to the naughty stuff. He'd be excited to take you to all sorts of alien markets, just to see your eyes light up with all of the products you never knew existed. He's always been a simple guy, so he doesn't need much for himself. For you though, he spares no expense. Since you two are often on long trips into deep space, he wants to make sure you are plenty occupied and not bored. You wouldn't get your own credit card, but all you have to do is look at something with your big sparkly eyes and he's ringing it up.

Kostas is far more practical than his cousin. You are allowed treats, but only for good behavior. He's carefully helping you learn how to control your temper with a reward sticker system. When you deal with an emotion appropriately, you get stickers that can be cashed out for a treat at the end of the week when the two of you go to town for supplies. He's very specific about the stickers he gets, too, so you enjoy collecting them because they are super cute, not just for the big prize.

<3 <3 <3

#yandere headcannon #headcanons #head canon #monster boyfriend #monster x girl #monster x reader #monster romance #yandere fluff #x reader #monster lover #sweet anons #yandere romance #yandere monster #alien headcanon #alien oc #yandere oc #monster oc

[missmonsters2]

—JOUSKA | THREE

Pairing: Wednesday Addams x OFC/Fem!Reader

Summary: Something and nothing at all changed. Wednesday is all too aware of the distance and the horrifying realization that if she wants to be closer, than she'll have to make the first move. Cue compulsively replaying a hypothetical conversation.

Warnings: Angst. Distracted!Wednesday. Wednesday generally being Bad At Feelings™️. Enid's wise words. Thing—the opportunist. Xavier absent but still not safe from Wednesday's roasts. Blood.

Series Masterlist | Library Blog | AO3

Reminder there’s no taglist but you can follow my library blog for notifications 💘

Note: This was intense to write, but it'll only get more intense! Likes, comments, & reblogs appreciated 🥺

Part Two

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷†⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Jouska: Noun. A hypothetical conversation that you compulsively play out in your head.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷†⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Something and nothing at all has changed since that night. 

"Hi, Wednesday."

Wednesday's eyes catch yours as she watches you flanked by two gorgon girls. You've got a white stick of a lollipop hanging in your mouth at the side, the grape confection already finished, but you don't like littering (unlike some of these other heathens at the academy).

Wednesday doesn't say anything back, but she does slow her walking down subtly, her brows relaxes and expression neutral as she looks at you. A nod of acknowledgment is all that is needed to satisfy you as you smile at her before looking away.

It's been like that since that night—the same acknowledgment, and it's all Wednesday can think about.

They've bonded, haven't they? Enid certainly said so. And if that was the case, why were you the same distance away? 

Wednesday can only think back to that night. 

"Black wings are the mark of a night faerie."

Wednesday doesn't rush her response. This was one of those moments, the one Enid was constantly telling her to be delicate about. 

The right words—Wednesday needed the right words.

It reminded her of when she first encountered the photo of herself from Rowan, and how she, too, thought she was destined for (bad) calamity. 

"Sometimes the dark doesn't cause calamity but rather is what no one expects at all," Wednesday looks at you, her eyes focused. "The solution."

But even as you give Wednesday a soft smile, she can see something dim behind your eyes, and the taste of utter defeat burns Wednesday's throat, knowing it wasn't the exact right words.

So, Wednesday was at a standstill. 

And she was also far from finding a nickname for you that she'd allow everyone to call you. The only bright side was everyone else was somehow doing worse than her with their suggestions despite her not having offered anything at all. 

There was a distance, Wednesday realizes. One that you seemed content to let be. 

Wednesday feels jolted by the realization that she's been fairly spoiled and blessed in her life (even if she didn't feel it at the moment). It had always been Wednesday who chose to keep her distance from those around her. She had her own interests and had been content to put them above everyone else. 

But ever since coming to Nevermore, her little ragtag of misfits—especially Enid—had intrusively barged into her personal space. Wednesday only had to take a small step forward, and everyone else had closed the distance. 

Everyone except you.

Wednesday Addams would never deny the fact that she wasn't free from things like desire. She desired many things: rain, mysteries, victory, the fear of others, and whatever things could be described as morbid.

She told her mother that she would never be like her—never fall in love, be a housewife, or have a family. And she had meant it at that moment (although she was very sure she'll never be a housewife). 

And really, it's not like Wednesday loves you or anything. But Wednesday has once felt enough to kiss a boy (who turned out to be a serial killer), and when she thinks of Enid, Eugene, and Xavier, she does feel like she has a strange little group to call a family of her own. She begrudgingly accepts Bianca to something like a distant, irritating cousin.

You piqued her curiosity very early on with your unintrusive smiles and waves. Now, you had an enigmatic background and a perhaps sense of self-preservation to remain distant. But it was too late. 

Wednesday desires mystery, and she desires you. 

They're not mutually exclusive.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷†⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Blood drips down from Wednesday's cheek. She touches her finger to the cut and looks at it curiously.

"You're distracted, Addams." 

Wednesday looks back to Bianca, who somehow manages to look both smug and concerned. While being beaten by Bianca again still leaves the feeling of self-pity, her rage is directed at herself. 

"And yet, you barely managed to defeat me," Wednesday drawls. 

"Well, pull your head out of the dark, gray clouds and focus so I can put you in your place again without your excuses," Bianca shoots back without hesitation. 

Wednesday starts to move into position when the coach halts it and tells her to go to the infirmary to take care of her cut. Clenching her jaw, Wednesday puts her equipment away and leaves the room. 

The cut stings, and Wednesday knows it was her own fault that Bianca cut her too deep. She was distracted. She has been lately ever since her realization that if she wanted to close the distance, she would have to be the one to intrude in your space. 

The problem was that Wednesday only knew how to intrude into someone's space when she was suspicious they were a serial killer—accusing and without permission. 

And thus, Wednesday has been afflicted with hypothetical conversations her brain refused to stop producing. It was costing her sleep, and now the victories that should belong to her. 

"Wednesday!" 

Turning around, Wednesday sees Enid skipping her way down toward her. The blonde frowns when she glances at Wednesday's cheek and pulls out a white handkerchief. It’s the only colorless fabric she owns. "Fencing?"

Wednesday nods, accepting the cloth as she dabs it against her face, wiping at her jaw where it dripped.

"Lose?" Enid winces in pain. 

A dark look crosses Wednesday's face, and Enid quickly changes the subject. 

"Are you excited for parents' weekend?" Enid asks. "I'm surprised Principal Weems has made it so early in the year. I hear she's making changes so parents visit once at the beginning of the year and once at the end of the year."

"If by excited you mean begrudgingly accepted it, yes," Wednesday monotones.

"But it'll be interesting to see who the fairy godmother's parents will be, right?" Enid rocks on her toes in anticipation. "I heard her dad is, like, a high lord or something."

The comment does spark interest in Wednesday. She is curious about the two people who had loved you so much that they took you out of isolation and parted ways with you in this safe haven. 

Assuming that they could visit you, anyway.

"That's also a witless sobriquet," Wednesday comments absentmindedly.

Enid only huffs. 

"Enid," Wednesday calls evenly.

"Hm?"

"How—why—" Wednesday takes a deep breath as her eyes close for a moment. When she opens them, she finds Enid staring at her curiously with an amused smile. Wednesday knows it was because she’s never this inarticulate, but Enid is gracious enough to not say anything about it and waits patiently for her to gather her thoughts. 

As patiently as she can, it seems.

"Not to rush you, but you should probably hurry on and say whatever it is you want to say so you can get on to the infirmary. The cut is starting to soak through my handkerchief," Enid gently pushes. 

Wednesday grinds her teeth for a second before sighing through her nose lightly. 

"How did you decide on how you wanted to be closer to me?" Wednesday asks, leaving as much emotion out of her tone as possible but cringing at her sentence. "Especially since it was obvious I wanted to keep my distance."

Enid's lip twitches, and Wednesday already regrets asking, but before she can turn around and leave, Enid answers. "Well, in your case, I think it was easier for me to tell you didn't really want to be alone, so I didn't ask."

Wednesday makes a vague face of disgust while Enid continues on. 

"But in your case," Enid stresses, smirking at Wednesday's unblinking face. "I think you should ask to do something together to be closer."

Wednesday's eyes flicker as she processes Enid's words. The memory of Tyler's efforts to take her to the catacomb, how he set up lights, and a movie pops into her mind. 

"Like a date," Wednesday says slowly, and horrification begins to set in.

"Er, I think that's a little too advanced for you," Enid cuts in quickly. "Maybe just try to find a way to spend more time together casually but consistently."

Enid looks at her watch. "Oh, I gotta go. Yoko and I need to start planning for the boat race this year." With that, Enid happily skips down the hallway. She turns around once and yells, "Oh, don't forget to wash the blood out of my handkerchief. I trust you'll know how to do that!"

Wednesday nods before she continues on her way to the infirmary. When she enters, she sees Weems talking to someone sitting on a cot behind the curtains. 

"I'm happy you've found a friend to help you, but I'm concerned—" Weems stops as soon as she sees Wednesday, frowning as she sees the cut and then sighs, "Coach Vlad had told me you and Bianca frequently spared without your helmets. I had hoped he was joking."

The curtains suddenly opened, and Wednesday wasn’t surprised. She could tell it was you by your silhouette. 

Immediately the hypothetical conversations she's been creating pops into her mind again.

"Hi, Wednesday," you smile with a short wave before you eye her cut. "Hope the other person looks worse off."

Weems clicks her tongue in disapproval, but Wednesday's lip twitches upward slightly. 

The principal is about to say something else when a small, lanky boy walks in. He clutches his wrist, but Wednesday can’t make out his feature with his overgrown fringe covering his eyes. He seems to see just fine, though, as his posture stiffens at the sight of you.

"O-Oh, F-Fae," he starts to say but then stutters. "No, sorry, I-I mean—"

"It's fine," you wave away his attempt at saying your name. "Did you hurt yourself in psychitect?"

He nods.

"I suppose I should go find the nurse. She went down to the cafeteria for a quick snack," Weems says before she looks at you. "We'll finish our conversation later."

"It's fine," you wave it off. "I can help Wednesday. We’ll be gone before you’re back."

Weems purses her lips in disapproval, but you just give her a look back. Sighing, Weems nods before she turns to walk out. "Glad to see you fitting in more this year, Wednesday. It's pleasant to see you in my office less."

"It's too early in the year still," Wednesday haughtily replies, eyes trailing Weems as she leaves the room. 

"Come along, Henry."

Once alone, Wednesday's eyes trail to you. 

"Well, take a seat," you stand up and gesture to the cot near her as you rummage through the cabinets. 

"I can do it myself."

"I'm sure you can," you absently say as you move bottles back and forth in search of something. When you find it, you turn around with a lopsided smile. "But I assure you I can do it better."

Wednesday only raises her eyes challengingly but sits down as you sit on the stool and roll over to her. She sits primly with her back straight as a rod when you come closer and closer. To allow your proximity, Wednesday has to open her legs for you to come between, being the one wearing pants. 

"Pretty nasty cut," you mumble, and Wednesday can smell grape lollipops. 

"I've had worse."

"Bragging, I see," you smirk as you put on gloves and use tweezers to soak a gauze pad in saline solution. "Xavier did tell me you took an arrow for him once."

"Xavier has an abnormally large mouth," Wednesday speaks tersely with a furrow of her brows. When you gently dab the soaked gauze pad on her cheek, it doesn’t sting, but Wednesday clenches her fists closed with your face so close. 

"I think he was bragging," you continue to dab. "Enid and Eugene have similar anecdotes. Thing, as well."

Wednesday huffs while you merely grin lightly. 

Enid's words and Wednesday's haunted hypotheticals were plaguing her again. 

"What were you and Weems talking about?" Wednesday asks to redirect the conversation. She had been curious since she walked in, as it seemed like a rather serious conversation. 

The thoughts aren’t going away.

"She was checking in after I told the nurse I had a friend to help me apply the medicine, and I'd only come in to do monthly examinations or if something serious happened."

Sometimes Wednesday isn’t used to people answering her questions so quickly and without pretense. She’s used to them being defensive. 

'Thing shouldn't be applying your medicine.' Wednesday clenches her jaw, refusing to let the thought slip out of her mouth. With you in sight, her mind refuses to stop the compulsive hypothetical conversations.

"I see," Wednesday says slowly. "And why is Weems so particularly concerned?"

"She's my legal guardian," you answer straightforwardly, inspecting Wednesday's wound as the bleeding slows. 

The sudden new information makes Wednesday blink. 

'If you use your brain and think about it, Thing is a disembodied hand with stitches all over. Do you think that's sanitary? Forget the fact that Thing is vain and does well in washing his hand and moisturizes.'

You put down the tweezers and take off the gloves. Lifting your fingertips, you hover them over the cut. Wednesday watches as you concentrate before warmth and tiny little firefly-like lights seeps onto her cheek. 

When it’s over, the sting of the cut is gone. Wednesday lifts her hand to touch her cheek and feels a thin bump of her skin scarred over. 

'I understand your need for secrecy. I've been told I lack regard for others’ safety but I have no intentions of being the reason for your untimely death.'

You turn to grab a tub of cream and unscrew the lid. "It's not exactly perfect, but better than the usual way," you say as if apologizing. "I'll get better at it as my wings heal."

"Your powers are linked to your wings?"

'And of course, I understand you don't prefer the nurse's care. Her touch is indelicate and I imagine your wings are sensitive.'

You hum and say quietly, "A lot of it, yes. Our wings are embedded into our backs and take root inside our bodies. It's why we usually die without our wings."

"And Weems is your guardian?" 

You nod. "Yes. As you know faeries stay in isolation, and faeries with my wings are...outcasts," you smirk. "My parents can't look after me like regular parents do because the more in contact with me they are, the more it exposes my location."

It makes sense. Whoever had done such abominable things to your wings should stay far, far away—lest they want Wednesday to find a way to paralyze them without taking their wings. 

Still.

Wednesday studies your face as you apply the scarring cream. Your parents must've been heartbroken and scared witless to take you out of isolation and have Weems take over guardianship. 

'As such, I must take responsibility for Thing and offer to take his place in applying your medication. This is an acceptable trade, is it not?'

"Your parents must've adored you so," Wednesday comments. She can certainly relate to that as she internally rolls her eyes at the thought of her own parents. 

You finish applying the cream, and Wednesday has had enough of the repetitive one-sided conversation in her head. It was going to drive her crazy—and not the respectable kind. 

But just as Wednesday opens her mouth to get it over with, her words die on her tongue when you look at her.

It was the same smile as that night, the one that made Wednesday's throat burn with utter defeat.

You must miss them. 

"Yes, I suppose they did."

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷†⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Wednesday lies in bed, staring at the ceiling, and the incessant noise of Enid's snoring is somehow amplifying her thoughts.

This. Is. Inconceivable. 

The thing with Wednesday is that she had an obsessive personality. That's why solving mysteries is such a good pastime for her. 

The only problem is when the mystery hasn't been solved, and she is left alone with the agonizing cliffhanger. 

What if the words hadn't died on her tongue? 

What if she had said them anyway, despite your smile that seemed to make Wednesday miserable. 

But the truth of the matter is that she didn't, and now, she is stuck in bed coming up with new hypothetical conversations that revolve around one matter.

'Thing is indisposed.'

'I'm offering my company and assistance. Thing may stay as an additional conversationalist.'

'Surely, you must have more to say to me daily than greeting me.'

'Thing has questionable scalpel skills; therefore, I believe he's been applying your medication inaccurately. I can't have your wings—your life source—healing poorly on my hands.'

This is all Enid's fault, Wednesday determines. She turns her head to watch her peacefully, blissfully ignorant sleeping roommate. 

Maybe she should come through with the threat of smothering Enid with a pillow. But in the end, Wednesday turns her head back to the ceiling. 

It’s then that Thing opens the door and scuttles across the room in haste. She sits up as he climbs up onto her bed and pulls at her blanket.

"What is it, Thing?" Wednesday frowns.

Thing begins signing and tapping.

"Speak clearly, Thing. You're skipping words."

Thing taps frustratedly but slows down.

"Someone…slapped…back today?" Wednesday raises her brow but then frowns deeper. "It opened a wound up...and you can't fix it yourself? Need help...now?"

Thing taps multiple times to signify that is correct. Immediately, Wednesday gets out of bed and grabs her sweater. 

"Where is she? Her room or her studio?" Wednesday asks as she shoves on her shoes, and Thing climbs onto her shoulder.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷†⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

When Wednesday arrives at your studio, following the same sequence she did weeks ago, she finds you fallen on the ground, your wings just barely over your shoulder as you hold yourself up by your elbows.

Blood drips down and soaks your feathers, somehow making obsidian look even darker. 

Wednesday walks up quickly and crouches beside you, and you barely notice her until she speaks. "Who did this to you? I want their name." She seethes.

"It was...an accident," you raggedly breathe. "She didn't know. Meant to be a friendly goodnight clap on the back."

But that doesn’t soothe Wednesday at all. Not when the back of your dress shirt is dredged in so much blood that there isn’t even a spot of white left, and your right wing twitching in obvious pain.

"What can I do?" Wednesday demands, but there was a softness to it that is almost desperation. 

You swallow. "I—I need you to move my wing over my shoulder more—until I can reach the cut to seal it." You screw your eyea shut. "I can't move it on my own."

Wednesday nods. She carefully reaches out to touch your wing.

It is velvety.

Wednesday imagines it would've been more magnificent to the touch had your feathers not been weighed down and saturated by blood. 

As Wednesday begins to spread your wing up and over, your breath hitches sharply.

Wednesday stops.

"Don't stop," you grit your teeth, taking in ragged breaths. "It hurts the longer you drag it out. Just—be gentle."

Gentle is not often used to describe Wednesday. She’s sharp and jagged, like broken glass. That's probably why she still plans to discover who did this to you and slowly butcher them—accident or not—as she carefully keeps moving your wing.

When it’s finally close enough for you to reach, Wednesday watches you use healing magic for the second time that day. You slump onto the grass, exhausted. 

Thing grabs Wednesday's attention to the pile of towels neatly folded in a tree's hollow trunk. She finds a set of spare clothing and grabs those along with the towels. 

"Is the pond water sterile?"

You nod with your eyes shut.

Wednesday places the shirt next to you and then turns to the pond, and sticks her hand in to find it was lukewarm before she soaks one of the towels.

“Change into this clean shirt for now,” Wednesday orders you but her tone lacks the usual bite. She wrings the towel and passes it to Thing. “Help her wipe the blood on her back. Turn around as she changes,” Wednesday warns Thing.

Wednesday turns away and keeps her focus on the pond, soaking the next towel. Thing taps her leg when they’re done. You look extra tired from having to change shirts but it was better than letting your bloody shirt make you sticky and then crust over before you could shower. You seem to realize it yourself as you make an effort to keep your dirty wings from soaking your shirt again.

When she returns to you, Wednesday cleans the blood out of your feathers gently but thoroughly. When she uses her fingers to brush aside some of the feathers, your wings trill. 

"Tickles," you mumble. 

Wednesday doesn’t comment as she continues until the blood is washed out and properly dried. Thing hands her the ointment you use and begins to apply the salve with precision. 

It’s quiet.

Peaceful.

Wednesday feels the tension in her shoulders leave now that you are fine and she is here. 

All those hypothetical thoughts and conversations flew right out of her head.

"I will apply this for you from now on."

You open one eye to peek at Wednesday, and she stares back at you as if to challenge her. You close your eye again and nod.

"Thanks for your services, Thing," you mumble tiredly. "Your severance package will be a bottle of dew drops."

PART FOUR

#wednesday addams x reader #wednesday addams imagine #wednesday x reader #jenna ortega x reader #wednesday addams fanfiction #wednesdayedit #wednesday addams x you #mm: my fics

[a-tale-of-legends]

Popping That Bubble

Summary: If Ramona is good at anything, it's being blunt as hell. If she sees someone who might need a rude awakening, she'll gladly put her words to hopefully good use.

Aka: Ramona needs royal compensation for all the bullshit she's willingly putting herself into. 

Notes: This was something i was making for a short while! Some spoilers for Indigo Disk below! And also just wanna say I really like Carmine's character, but she does need a talking too, hence Ramona. I think that's everything, so I hope you enjoy!

~~~

Ramona severely underestimated how bad the situation was. Kieran's sudden- well. Maybe not sudden, they hadn't seen him since Kitakami - change was….unsettling, to say the least. But not something completely unexpected, if she was being honest. That doesn't mean she wished it didn't happen, especially when both his and Luca's already awkward situation is made more awkward….

And now, Drayton ( that fucking bitch ass motherfucker-) has pretty much forced Luca to take on their elite four to dethrone Kieran which- it just gives her such a headache thinking of how all of that could go south. But, and she hates agreeing with Drayton here, dethroning Kieran is probably the best way to pop that bubble he’s holding himself in. Drayton is still a fucking bitch though. 

Which leads them both to here. Luca just finished battling Crispin - a close battle if has ever seen one - and the two decided to take a small break with a picnic…..the sandwich making made her hungry.

Luca has been….quiet. Unnaturally so. Even before, with his anxiety of seeing Kieran again, he was always the more talkative of the two. But now he just sits in silence, watching their Pokemon play. 

Hm. 

“ So.” Ramona starts, “ How ya feelin'?” She watches Luca jump slightly, looking at her with wide eyes. 

“ Huh? What?” Luca says, causing Ramona to roll her eyes a bit. 

“ How are you feeling, Luca. About everything…. about Kieran,”

“ …..Oh,” Luca looks down, “ I….I don't know” He sighs, breaking a piece of his sandwich, and eats it. 

“ He’s changed so much. Like- you saw how he treated that league club member! And he just….there's just no light in his eyes. I want to talk to him, but I don't think I can…”

Ramona hums, taking in Luca’s worries. 

“ Hm…so. Let's say you're able to teach him to the top and talk things out. And let's say he still doesn't listen and continues to act like he is now. What would you do?”

Luca blinks again, taken aback by the question. His crown deepens, pondering on his answer. 

“ I….I want to still try. To reach out to him. He- he shouldn't be alone, you know? And maybe then I'll be able to just…reach him again” 

Ramona sighs. She doesn't like playing the bad guy. But it's a role she's way too good at. 

“ Luca,” she starts, her voice stern, “ You're not going to like what I'm about to say, but know I'm saying this for your own well-being, okay?”

Luca straightens up, “ Okay…”. Ramona takes a breath. 

“ If the hypothetically that I just described comes true, you aren't going to keep trying to reach Kieran. You’re going to leave him to handle his emotions on his own.” 

Luca's eyes widen, and a scowl appears on his face, his anger in his eyes. 

“ What?! How can you even say that-”

“ Luca,” Ramona starts again, her voice even, “ I know that sounds bad. I know the last thing you want to do is to leave Kieran hanging. But I need you to know that you aren't responsible for him. If Kieran isn't willing to change, then you’ll just let him and move on. Let him figure it out for himself,” 

Luca shakes his head defiantly, “ B-but- Kitakami-”

“ That's a conversation you both need to have, yes. But that can only happen if you both are willing to listen,” she looks Luca dead in the eye, “ Do you think he’s willing to listen, Luca?”

Luca matches her stare, and the two stare at each other for a bit….before Luca deflates, casting his eyes down 

“....No…” he sniffs, “ ….I don't want that to happen…”

“ I know. Let's hope that it doesn't. But in the case that it does….” 

“ Yeah,” Luca sighs, wiping his eyes, “ Yeah, okay…..I'll still try, though. I have to,” 

Ramona chuckles. 

“ I wouldn't expect anything less, Luca,”

~~~~

Carmine is a bitch. Ramona has said this to her face multiple times now, which often results in the two arguing their heads off. So how and why did she end up being the girl's study partner, Ramona has no clue. 

Ramona finds herself asking that same question as she watches Carmine pace back and forth in the empty classroom. They were supposed to be working on a paper together, but Carmine decided to use Ramona as her vent buddy. Unwillingly, Ramona must stress 

“ I just don't know what to do!” Carmine says for the 5th time, “ He’s just so….. different! I can’t even speak to him anymore! And now he’s causing problems for the BB league and the entire school and -” 

“ Carmine, you have been telling me the exact same thing for the past 5 minutes, are you going to help me with this research paper or not?” 

Carmine glares down at Ramona, crossing her arms. 

“ Hey! I've already done most of the work before you even came here! And can't you see I'm having a moment here?! Show some sympathy!!”

Ramona can feel herself popping a vein already. 

“ Maybe, I would have some sympathy if you just apologized to your brother and stopped being a bitch all the time!”

Carmine's face turned red, her hands shaking with anger.

“Excuse me?! Why you-”

“ Actually you know what? I’m not finished, so shut up,” Ramona huffs, crossing her arms, “You out here worrying about your little brother, hating how he’s acting, and yet you won't even acknowledge the reason why!”

“ Of course, I know why!” Carmine says, rolling her eyes, “ Luca-”

“ Wrong!” Ramona cuts her off, sitting herself up to match Carmine’s gaze, “ Carmine, he's like this because of you, ” 

“ Wha- me?! What did I do?!” 

“ You continuously bullied him. You never allowed him to do things on his own. You-” she aggressively points at Carmine, “ Was the one that even suggested Luca lie to him! There’s plenty of ways to prevent Kieran from chasing after Ogerpon, and you chose the one that’ll hurt the most.” She sighs, moving her hand to rub her temples. 

“ Hell, he’s even starting to act like you! And you don't think this is your fault?!” 

Carmine glares at Ramona, in which she glares back with equal bitterness. It only takes a minute for Carmine's glare to waver. 

“....I just…I just wanted to protect him,”

Ramona raises a brow.

“That's not an excuse, but go on.”

Carmine nervously grips the ends of her hair, looking off the side, worry in her eyes, “ W-when we were young, it was always up to me to look after Kiki and me,” 

Suddenly the animosity that Ramona has for Carmine lessens. That….that sounds too familiar. 

“ ….Okay…” Ramona says slowly, opting for Carmine to continue. 

“ And I took that role seriously! Though…” she looks down, “ I don't think I was good at it. Or qualified too…”

‘ Yeah no kidding,’ Ramona snips in her mind, but she doesn't say it out loud. Carmine is being vulnerable here. Why with her, she has no clue, but she isn't going to disrespect it. 

“ But Kiki- Kieran. He was…” Carmine takes a deep breath, “ He was always so weak-willed. So easy to boss around. I thought that would make things easier for us, you know? If he just listens to what I say, the risk of him getting himself hurt lessens 100%,”

Ramona can’t help but frown, her eyes furrowing slightly. 

“ Carmine-”

“ I know-”

“ You have to let him live, Carmine,”

“ I know! I know I…I didn't know what else to do. And I thought it was fine until…” she sighs, dropping her hands to her sides, “ ….I’m an awful sister, huh?” 

“ Kinda yeah” 

Carmine sputters, looking at Ramona with wide eyes, “ You just- why are you so blunt?!”

“ You said it. I’m simply agreeing,” Ramona shrugs and Carmine groans. 

“ You’re unbelievable,” she ‘tchs’, crossing her arms and looking off to the side, “....You know I never admitted that out loud before. Heck, I don't think I ever admitted that to myself. I….I think I get it now.” She turns back to Ramona, her eyes determined. 

“ I have to apologize to Kieran. And just talk to him about…. everything. It's something long overdue, yeah?”

“Heh,” Ramona smirks, “ Look at you. I didn't even have to say it,” 

Carmine rolls her eyes, as she finally walks towards Ramona to sit down next to her. 

“ Ugh, yeah, because if you said it, it would have been annoying!” she huffs as she takes her seat, though her expression is much softer, “ ….thanks. For uh. Listening. And not taking any bullshit,”

“ Someone has to,” Ramona snorts, feeling herself smile a little, “ Gotta keep that ego in check, right?” 

Carmine merely tchs, and Ramona giggles. 

“ ….If you don't follow through on your word to talk to Kieran, and apologize to him, I will kick your ass,”

“ Wh- kick my ass?! What makes you think you can do that?!”

Ramona’s grin widens, cracking her knuckles. 

“ Wanna find out-”

“ Aaaaaaaaaw,” Drayton’s voice breaks between the banter. The two look to the side to see Drayton leaning on the door frame, smirking lazily at the two. 

“ Never in my life would I have thought to see you two get along! It's a beautiful sight, I tell ya!” 

Ramona looks at Carmine. Carmine looks at Ramona. They both glared daggers at Drayton. 

“ SHUT UP YOU TOOTHPASTE BOZO!”

“ GET THE FUCK OUT!”

~~~

Watching from the sidelines as Kieran be an ass is tough. Being in the same room with other people as Kieran is an ass is tough. But by far the hardest thing is being in the same elevator with Kieran. Alone. No one to share the awkwardness, no one for her to give emotional support to, nothing. Just her and Kieran. Alone. In an elevator.

…. Can't this thing go any faster???

She wonders if she should talk to him. She glances at him quickly, then back to the closed elevator door. 

….fuck it. 

“ Look,” she starts, not going to bother with any sweet talk, “ I won't sugarcoat it. You're being an asshole. Both to others and yourself. I get that you want to be strong, but you’re not only pushing others away but also pushing yourself to an unhealthy degree,”

She pauses, looking at Kieran to see any sort of reaction. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. He doesn't even look at her, simply staring at the elevator door. It's…. honestly scary. How blank his expression is. Ramona feels herself frown more. 

“ Whatever narrative that you think is being placed, it doesn't have to be that way. We’re all worried for you. You can talk to us. Luca-”

“ I don't need to hear unwanted advice from someone weak,”

Ramona's eyes widen just as the elevator door rings, opening to the terrarium. Kieran walks out, not even giving Ramona another glance, and she just glares into his back. 

This. Fucking. Kid. 

“ Luca will beat you,” she says without thinking, voice dripped with venom. That causes Kieran to stop. Flinch even. Good. 

“ He’ll beat you to the ground,” she grits out. Kieran turns around as the elevator door closes. The last thing Ramona sees is Kieran's yellow eye glaring back at her. 

The elevator closes, and she's by her lonesome. The anger is gone as quickly as it rises, and Ramona couldn't help but grimace at the interaction she just had. 

“ Shit…. shouldn't have said that,” she sighs, rubbing her temples, “ I probably made the situation worse now….fuck. Luca doesn't need that,”. 

She presses a button to go back up to the top floor. She was supposed to meet Luca at the terrarium, but she's not gonna risk running into Kieran again. Not after that. 

… She also might need some time to calm down a bit more. That too. 

She sends Luca a quick text, saying she'll be late. Yet another sign escaped her lips. Why is school so dramatic? Jeez. 

~~~

Watching Luca and Kieran hug after yet another shit show in Area Zero was nice. Very nice, actually, Ramona is glad that their weird drama is over now. She smiles as they run up to her and Carmine, the two smiling widely. Kieran catches her eye, and he bashfully smiles at her. Ramona smirks. They can talk later. But first-

“ Alright, let's hurry up and get inside. I need a fucking nap,” 

“ Ugh, tell me about it,” Carmine groans in agreement. 

“ I dunno, I feel kinda energized now…” Luca mumbles and Ramona stares into his soul. 

“ Luca.”

Luca raises his arms up, snickering. 

“ Kidding! I’m kidding,” he quickly rebuttals, and Kieran giggles a bit at their antics. 

“ Hmph,” she huffs, rolling her eyes. But a small smile reaches her face. 

Things worked out for the better. It was long and convoluted, but whatever. That's just life for ya. It's just a matter of popping that bubble. 

#pokemon oc #oc: ramona beatriz luna #oc: luca valero #pokemon kieran #rival kieran #pokemon carmine #rival carmine #pokemon drayton #drayton has very little to do with this i'm just proud of a joke i made #r.b does NOT like his ass lmao

[weebsinstash]

Wow the "conclusion" to this is wild. Lmao @ her saying that she'll look at your blog in the future to feel better about herself. Hobbyless behavior. Sorry you got all of that shit for months, it's just so fucking bizarre. I really love your writing and your blog and I hope despite all of that shit that you're having a good day 💕

I'm just like. Kind of sitting here wondering what the point even was.

Like literally at the core of this argument was i posted about a family event and a complete stranger got so extremely upset that they. Literally started a fight on anon, and then after I told them to get fucked, then proceeded to pretend to be an underage rape survivor and said I made them attempt suicide, and then messaged TONS of people saying "weebsinstash is a rape apologist who bullied cjfjfj" and it was literally all a fucking lie. They want to say they bullied me for entertainment but what was rhe point of like. Harassing dozens of other people who weren't even involved. That's obviously not when anything to do with me. That's acting like a freak because you think it's Cute And Quirky

Like. I cannot emphasize enough that the hypothetical child who harmed themselves was the literal only single aspect of this entire thing that could even mildly make me feel bad and this actually stupid fucking cunt gave themselves up, "oh by the way that person was never real" like, damn if you were an actual good troll you never would've revealed that, so you can't even be a little basement dweller correctly

Imagine being like "yeah you know the literal only thing about this that might actually cause you some sort of guilt and was the crux of my whole crusade against you lol yeah it was just a lie and the friends who apologized on my behalf were also me and the people who were nice to you were also me" like wow you were OBSESSED OBSESSED

But there's also so many more layers to that? They made blogs and maintained them to talk to me pretending to be people who were also harassed. They literally gave me emotional support as a "gotcha"? Like how is that a gag. Do you not realize repeatedly popping out of the woodwork saying "hey every mean thing that was said to you over xyz amount of months was me all along" has literally just trained me to automatically blame you for any bad feedback and thus you have granted me the ability to be insulted and not care. Like literally any time I get an ask about anything and it's rude I just assume it's this one single person now. And I don't get hate mail so it was always kind of obvious anyways. But like they literallt actually gave me a gift because I won't really ever believe anything nasty I get ever again :)

But like. The sheer. Actual literal disconnect from reality for this person to fully say with their whole chest, "ha ha yeah I really showed YOU and made YOU look stupid, the way I pretended to be a child, lied about rape, publicly harassed complete strangers, tried to doxx you, made a fake dating profile for you, uploaded your photos in multiple places, sent you stuff on anon to take credit for it later, and maintained disguises for most of a year, haha wow don't YOU look dumb!"

Bro after like one month of this shit I literally just started thinking, "oh it's that one moron again" and nothing was ever hurtful ever again. You have to realize there's a point where someone has made themselves look so stupid and unlikeable you don't care what they think so it's sort of like. Oh woo hoo you called me ugly and fat, got any new material? Like I don't even have to think "oh gosh I'm so ugly and gross and I feel bad cause they said that" I just think "oh wow potshots at my appearance, yeah that's what I would expect someone of your intelligence to say"

I just. Can I just be blunt and say this wasn't even good trolling. It was annoying but they were so blatantly bad at it literally everyone just looked at the kind of shit they posted and immediately called them unhinged. There wasn't a coherent enough effort here to ever actually do any real damage, not to my personal life or my social reputation. I'm literally coming out of this just as clean as I went in. Like shit you really could have tried to dig in on that "look what she said to this poor widdle baby" angle but you just went full retard sending me literal actual paragraphs saying the most basic of insults. Yeah wow there was really ever a chance people were going to seriously believe you, sure

It's just kinda. Yeah. I know I already said this but I can't get over, my end of this is opening my inbox and deleting shit and nothing more, i may answer stuff and discuss it but nothing is happening to me and im not "doing anything back". Meanwhile they were literally making blogs, maintaining covers, trying to stalk me, stalking my mutuals, found pictures of my family, were sending pictures of my family to other people.... but claim THEY made ME look stupid, that I'M entertaining for THEM. OK. I guess that's the level of genuine delusion you have to operate on to even start this shit to begin with

But uh yeah to finish your point I actually had a great day at work and got a good raise recently so I'm doing OK :) I've been uh, you know, working on drafts and maybe someday one of them will see the light haha. If I ever need a pick me up I can always tell myself, "at least I never did anything as stupid as THIS"

#like what were you even trying to do. it wasnt even annoying aftwr a while it was very easily dealt with #sorry this keeps coming back guys i just. i had to share them saying everything was a lie holy shit like everythijg everything #doxxingdrama

[jacscorner]

Toriel and Asgore have their issues to work through. Which is why Asgore is spanking his ex-wife, to help give her some closure and maybe rekindle that old flame. You know, while kindlng a flame over Toriel's rump.

So, Undertale. I'm not the biggest fan of the game(series?): but I do have one thing to say about it: I think the fandom has gone out of its way to villify Asgore while making Toriel out to be a saint.

Granted, Asgore is pretty easy to hate: if we take the text of the game at face value, Asgore is directly responsible for the death of six other human children that, at one point of another, Toriel tried to save. But, Asgore is a greiving father who lost his children to humans and the king of Monsters, trapped under the mountain by those humans. What he's doing is wrong, and I'm not justifying it, but there is a reason for what he does. And he doesn't WANT to do it; he made this decision out of anger and he feels he can't go back on it.

Meanwhile, Toriel left her husband and left for the ruins where she tries to take care of the Humans who come her way. But, at one point or another, they have to leave if they wanna escape the underground and go home. On paper, of course Toriel is beloved by the fandom at large while Asgore, well, is not. Toriel teaches Mercy, Asgore Vengeance.

There's a problem with that assesstment, however: Toriel doesn't teach you to SPARE.

Toriel tries to assure you that if any conflict comes, she'll resolve it-as in, she'll come in, intimidate whoever is attacking you into leaving. And in the Ruins, that's all the player needs. And I'm sure that's what the other 6 humans needed, but they still left cause they wanted to go home. And Toriel left them to fend for themselves. It's not like she's exiled or condemned to the Ruins, she's there of her own choice. Nothing is REALLY stopping Toriel from coming with you through the entire game, being a guide through the underground and meeting all your hypothetical friends. Hell, being the former Queen, I'm sure most Monsters would back down without a fight, if not out of fear, than out of respect. So why did she do nothing? And why does she continue to do nothing when you spare her?

Well, not because she's the secret villain of the game, but much like Asgore, she's a grieving parent. Imagine: you try to keep a child from leaving, knowing that if they leave, they're liable to die, if not by Asgore's hands, then by the hands of someone else. It might be too painful to think about allowing them back into the Ruins or to even think about whether or not they're alive after they're gone. It's easier to just think that either they're dead the moment eyes are off of them or that Asgore, your former husband, is dead. And depsite her anger, and the idea that maybe they can't reforge the relationship they once had, I doubt Toriel really hates Asgore. They're both damaged adults, who both lost a child that they lost. They're both in pain, but Toriel chooses to wall herself away in the ruins. Sure, it hurts to think that one or both of them are dead, but it's easier than moving foward.

After all, in this world, it's Kill or Be Killed.

Hey, Flowey had to learn that from somewhere. And while nobody else really says the mantra, I think Toriel firmly believes the idea. Cause she doesn't let Frisk leave the ruins unless you prove you're strong enough to kill her, someone who's just as strong as Asgore in most degrees, and not be killed (or strong enough to spare her and prove there is another way). 

Undertale, I believe, has no real villains. Just Monsters dealing with grief and despair.

#JAC Art #Spank #Undertale #N/SFW #Toriel #Asgore Dreemurr #Monster #Boss Monster #Goat #Furry #Anthro #Anthropomorphic

[midnightdemonhunter]

GOD THAT WAS GREAT !!! I'M ACHING !!!!! fuckin UHHHHH could we hear some about mikan & junko too then? junko & sonia? junkoooooo & akane & nekomaru? the last two in particular i always struggle with thinking of as despairs, & i'd love to hear your takes on them & literally any fleck of the remnants you want to discuss <3

THANK YOU!!!! I spend my days constantly thinking about Junko with class 77 and the remnants, so I'm absolutely delighted to get the chance to talk about them!! (put under Read More cause i have a LOT to say)

The big pain about Mikan and Junko to me is the idea that Junko is just NICE to her. Like she bumps into Mikan on her first day of school and laughs off Mikan's apologies. She says good morning to her every time they meet. She doesn't blink at Mikan's ramblings. Like she's giving Mikan a normal amount of attention and because Mikan is so starved for attention Junko becomes the love of her life. And it's like MAN she would have felt this way about whoever treated her like this and Junko just happened to be the first.

I think Junko's big thing pre-tragedy is to ask fucked up hypotheticals to everyone she knows, and she has a blast doing it with Mikan-- who's always happy to answer insane medical questions. And then after the tragedy...well Junko has always forgiven and embraced Mikan's worse traits-- surely Mikan owes her Beloved the same!

In terms of remnant Mikan...I feel like my ideas are the least revolutionary? She's one of the few remnants who 1. Has a reasonable amount of fics/art 2. Has a reasonable amount of GOOD fics/art So i don't have a lot of unique concepts with her?? I do absolutely love the idea that she is one of the less crazy remnants-- since for all we know, she's a mild one!

I really think Sonia would love Junko. Junko is a blunt, morbid person who would delight in Sonia's serial killer obsession, and they would have a great time binging horror movies and discussing Hypothetical Fights to the Death. Sonia is one of the many people Junko dates in the lost years, and they're sparkling blondes on the surface-- very violent cheerful conversations below it.

In the end...Sonia proposes to Junko, and offers her a spot on the throne. Junko happily accepts! Junko then precedes to happily kill herself in a very non hypothetical killing game, breaking Sonia's heart. Now Sonia is a bride abandoned at the alter, who wears her wedding dress permanently in honor of her departed love. She has BIG Mrs Havisham vibes.

I very much respect all Girlboss remnant Sonia concepts but unfortunately I have doomed her to be a sad girlfail girlcry. She finds the idea of anyone finding her attractive after Junko horrifying, and mutilates herself as a way of preventing this. She has chosen Junko over her kingdom, and she is very aware of this choice.

ARGH AKANE AND NEKOMARU. Honestly I agree with you, these two are really hard to nail down as remnants. Nekomaru especially, since he is both gay and seemingly very emotionally healthy, so it's harder to imagine him going to any of the lengths the remnants go to for Junko. However I try my best to justify and imagine it!!

In school, both Nekomaru and Akane were Junko's sparring partners. (separately). Nekomaru is very concerned about Junko but is also under the impression that he can fix her. HE CAN NOT. Junko wants to see how far she can push him in their fights, and how violent he can get with her. She'll leave their sparring sessions bruised and bleeding and beaming. Akane's sparring sessions are much less bloody, but much more homoerotic. Junko always loses the fights but wins the arguments.

Neither of them realise how much Junko means to them UNTIL she dies on live television. Nekomaru feels like he failed one of his athletes, and Akane only realises she was in love now that Junko's gone. Akane becomes determined to never get attached or become weak again, and stops eating. She avoids Nekomaru out of repressed guilt on how badly she's treating her body. She also kills a lot of people she used to care about as a way of cutting ties Whoops.

Nekomaru....is the most emotionally healthy remnant who moves in with Souda and is still happy but...he also cuts off his legs to replace them with prosthetics which contain Junko's bones so uh. There's that. He also really enjoys violence now! Thanks Junko!

Basically, I have pretty clear images on where Nekomaru and Akane are at Hopes Peak and as Remnants, it's just the inbetween I find hard.

Getting back to more general here, but I really do have a LOT of remnant thoughts, as you can see from my ask blog (which I'm very slow with but still remember) and all the fics I've written. Speaking of remnant fics, I'm gonna plug Those Who Carried On here because it's where I've started putting all my other standalone remnant concepts that exist basically to expand the possibilities of the remnants. That fic is a delight to work on and I very much want everyone to see it!

If you're interested in more of my remnant or class 77 Junko dynamic thoughts, please feel free to send more asks like this one! This is really only the tip of the iceburg, and I'd love to discuss my personal remnant ideas, the interpretations i love in the fandom and the ones I don't, as well as any other remnant/lost years concepts! (as well as my seething hatred of dr3) If you personally want to talk about this stuff more in-depth with me, hit up my tumblr dms and I can keep talking. I'd love to hear your thoughts as well! Once again, thanks for the ask and the excuse to ramble!

#danganronpa #sdr2 #remnants of despair #junko enoshima #mikan tsumiki #nekomaru nidai #akane owari #sonia nevermind #midnight speaks #THATS ALL FOR RIGHT NOW I HAVE TO GO PASS OUT #but this has been so fun op please keep this going its very fun #all your nice comments on my remnant stuff means the world :))

[jackredfieldwasmyjacob]

Hi! I know that you are Glee and SkamEs fan. So I wanted to ask yuo how do you think could be an hypothetical crossover between theese two shows? :)

Anon I love you omg

I mean the ideal thing would be to adapt Glee into a Glee España situation cause that's literally like my dream (also it could be an oportunity to like make all the Glee plots not suck and stuff)

But if we're talking about like a crossover situation this is what I'd imagine:

It would be like the Eskam girlies showing Spanish songs to the Glee kids, and as this is hypothetical I'm not gonna date this in any particular year or season so there's probably gonna be some inacuracies sjdsjdjs

Nora would have this plot with Rachel and Mercedes in which she's like too shy to sing and stuff and the Glee girls will encourage her to follow her dreams. In the end Nora will have one of those long dress-alone in the auditorium-ballad moments, singing La Tormenta by Pastora Soler OR La Fiesta Terminó by Paloma San Basilio.

Cris would ABSOLUTELY sing a duet with Santana, I'm thinking Tusa.

Viri would probably fall for Blaine and sing Solamente Tú by Pablo Alborán before getting rejected.

I'm deciding Joana would also be there and she'll help Tina realize she's queer, and probably duet A Quién Le Importa with her.

Amira would help Unique out and afterwards they'll sing at a karaoke Mon Amour.

Eva would spend all the time thinking how Jorge would've loved being there, she'll tell Quinn and they'll send him a video of Eva singing Copenhague with backing vocals by Quinn.

There'll be this quick sketch where the Glee guys (I'm thinking mostly Finn, Puck and Sam) would like stereotype Spanish music, saying its not for them, and the girls would in response perform Zapatillas in the auditorium (Joana and Eva with vocals, Amira with drums, Cris and Nora guitar and bass).

The final performance would of course be La Revolución Sexual OR Eso Que Tú Me Das (or a mash up of the two of them).

#ask #skam españa #i'm sorry i didn't know what to do with eva lol that was the best i could get #i feel she's more of an indie girl maybe??? #but also likes estopa and ecdl and stuff #viri of course had to sing pablo alboran #and cris with santana is like a match made in heaven lol #anyways i have SO MANY IDEAS for a potential glee españa #i could write a whole show #in fact i started writing it but whatever lol #anyways @ javis i know you would be up for this #or @ netflix give me the money and i'll do the rest #i even have a fan cast with ot contestants and everything #and a playlist with potential songs #one day... #WAIT I JUST REALISED JOANA SHOULD PROBABLY SING A TEQUILA SONG #cause they're argentinian and very popular in spain as well

[punkscowardschampions]

Ava & James

Ava: It's probably a lost cause Ava: but I lost my bracelet when we went out Ava: I remember having it in the first club but not after that Ava: If you're in the 2nd again, could you ask? Ava: No doubt it's long gone but James: I'll ring, I know the owner James: but I'll need a description, I don't remember what it looks like Ava: Thanks Ava: [sends picture like oh hey remember this face] James: [a long enough pause for him to have been trying to find this bracelet everywhere and she probably thinks he's fucked off] James: sorry, no joy Ava: Oh, no worries Ava: Cheers anyway, like James: did you go anywhere after? James: you could've had it on longer than you think Ava: I've already rang Kings, in case I left it in the dorm or something but no luck there either James: none with uber either James: kept me on hold for ages to let me know they don't have it Ava: Ugh, sorry Ava: Don't worry any more on it, it isn't sentimental or anything like that James: it was kind of a helping hand honestly, youngest liked the music they played, a very impromptu lullaby from an unexpected source Ava: Well, who knew hold music was good for anything but rage quits Ava: Unless they're now having a really angry nap James: 😂 James: that'll more likely be me later Ava: If you're lucky, yeah? James: if it hasn't run out Ava: Surely not James: they've both got some kind of hangover detector James: I'm sure you can imagine Ava: I've spent enough time with my nephew to know Ava: No sympathy from a toddler James: indeed Ava: Look, I don't know if I should even bring it back up but I'm sorry for how things went down that night James: I don't get caught up in regrets, remember Ava: I remember Ava: But I didn't Ava: I don't have bad intentions or anything, that's not me James: you've not struck me as someone who does Ava: How do I strike you? James: It was agreed I'd need longer than an evening to answer that Ava: I suppose Ava: First impressions can still be a thing James: it was a good first impression Ava: I'm glad James: but you're also sorry? Ava: I can't be both? James: you can Ava: So, you aren't sorry Ava: but are you glad? James: I can't be Ava: Yeah Ava: that's why I can't not be sorry James: It's me who should be sorry Ava: That's up to you Ava: if you don't do regrets you don't James: my actions don't only affect me Ava: I know Ava: Well, you won't get any trouble from me, like I said, not about that James: there's a line drawn under it James: you won't get any from me either James: [lies because you know he's bought her a replacement bracelet so she'll literally get that like the next day, boy we see you okay] Ava: Okay James: it was fun while it lasted, don't beat yourself up any harder James: the big glasses were cute but you shouldn't have to keep them on indefinitely Ava: Jesus Ava: Don't you know you're meant to pretend you didn't see that James: but walking around with your eyes & mouth closed all the time is very exhausting & I haven't had my nap yet Ava: I also have no sympathy for you, idiot James: I think you have some, but I don't blame you for not wanting to give it to me Ava: Nope, none Ava: I promise Ava: no space in my head James: oh Ava James: you have my sympathies, in that case Ava: Don't James: you don't want them? Ava: Let's say I don't do sympathies James: understood James: they are easy to get weighed down in Ava: and so rarely sincere James: it's reminiscent of wearing wet clothes, people only really want you to take them off in order to spare themselves the puddles James: they ask you if you're cold but they care about their floors Ava: Exactly Ava: and floors are more important 'round here Ava: and anything resembling sincerity is as unsightly as a damp mark on your new carpet James: the content I'll require for my English degree is writing itself Ava: Is that what you want to do, really? James: it's a question that'll get answered as often as it's asked Ava: How often do you get told what you want then James: daily at least Ava: How often does it come close James: it has yet to Ava: Oh James James: you don't do sympathies James: please never change on my account Ava: It could be empathy James: but is it? Ava: We'd need another night James: how many more bracelets have you got to lose? Ava: 😂 Ava: What kind of Chelsea girl do you take me for? James: you heard me say it was a good first impression Ava: 😏 I'd take a bow but can't risk losing any more jewels today James: we'll pretend you really did Ava: If that's what you're into, II James: what kind of Kensington boy do you take me for? Ava: Won't be the first to have a #scandal James: no trouble, need I remind you Ava: Just hypothetical, obviously James: you just hypothetically wanna know what I'm into? Ava: I just hypothetically hit the nail on the head James: if that's what you think, Ava Ava: Go on then Ava: Are you even gonna hypothetically tell the truth though? James: where's a hypothetical lie getting me? Ava: Away from hypothetical shame if it's weird shit Ava: I'm not one for hypothetical judgment though James: I'm not one for hypothetical shame Ava: Soooo Ava: 👀 James: I don't know, truthfully James: I'd need a whole hypothetical life, I suppose Ava: Fair Ava: It's a pretty bait question anyway James: you have an answer though, I can tell Ava: Singular? Ava: How rude James: 😂 James: because one leads to another not because you're hypothetically uninteresting Ava: Yeah, that's right Ava: about to be so hypothetically fuming James: you can have as many hypothetical apologies as you have interests, okay? Ava: No need to change on my behalf, however hypothetical James: what makes you think a personality change would be required Ava: Apologies are awful close to regret James: I'm not saying them to myself Ava: Try it out then Ava: See if I'm into it James: I'm really sorry I had to leave Ava: Me too Ava: but I don't think I'm about it, so you don't need to mention it again James: if you don't want me to, I won't Ava: I figure you owe enough sorries to more important people Ava: I'm good, honest James: I'm happy to hear it James: & not looking to mess anything up for you, hypothetically or actually Ava: I know Ava: You haven't Ava: it isn't my business so you know, no obligation to answer Ava: but why did you get married so young? James: because I had a baby to raise that young Ava: Yeah James: I wanted to do something that would actually help, at least shut up our parents because there was no silencing all the horrible things everyone else was saying James: It wasn't fair to treat her suddenly like public enemy number 1, not for that Ava: That makes sense Ava: I can see the logic James: It was a mistake we both made, I couldn't just leave her to it James: but I don't know, maybe we'd have both been better off if we'd approached it differently James: as parents but not a couple Ava: Well, it isn't permanent Ava: You can still do that Ava: Co-parent, that's not leaving her to it James: She won't let that happen Ava: It won't be easy Ava: It's weighing up if the now is worse than how invariably shit divorce is James: every time I try to leave I'm not allowed to see or speak to them until I go back James: she gets everyone on her side, including my parents Ava: If you go through official avenues, she won't just be able to do that Ava: She can't say you're unfit because you're not Ava: That's so shit and Ava: not right James: but she'll get my daughter to say that she hates me & doesn't wanna see me by telling her that's what I'm saying, I know she'll turn them both against me long before anything gets officially sorted out James: last time I walked out she told Jay so many things that aren't true Ava: She'd say that to a kid? Ava: Her kid? Ava: what's wrong with her James: I've given up trying to figure out everything that is Ava: You can't do this forever Ava: You deserve better Ava: you don't get to fuck someone over because you have a kid with them, imagine it reversed, how much of a bad guy you'd be then, it's no different just because she's the mum James: I'll send them both away to school when they're older, but for now I have to do this Ava: How do you do it Ava: How have you lasted this long, never mind how long that will be James: I see my children every day, it makes everything else bearable James: & I know they need that Ava: Yeah Ava: They're the most important thing Ava: but you matter as well, you can't Ava: I don't know James: for better or worse, right? Ava: You don't get to pick one each though, like James: I made my bed, Ava James: everyone told me not to marry her but I did Ava: 'cos you thought it was the right thing Ava: it shouldn't function as a lifelong punishment James: I never thought it was right James: I just wanted to be a better dad than I've got James: & that was the only way she'd let me Ava: That's a good reason Ava: even if it turned out not to be the best idea James: bad ideas have been around longer than she has James: I can't remember when I last had a good one James: I'd have been younger than you Ava: It's hard to make them when you have to commit to the worst, like Ava: you've gotta do something for you Ava: just 'cos you wanna Ava: or you'll lose it James: I will if you'll meet me for coffee James: I wanna see you again Ava: Okay Ava: I'd like to see you too James: tomorrow? Ava: I can do that Ava: What time, I have lunch at 1 or I can do after 5 James: lunch works Ava: Cool Ava: Looking forward to it James: I am too Ava: 😊 James: [when you're gonna have to go so far away for your date so you don't get spotted lol] Ava: [honestly should defs say its a school day so you ain't getting back for afternoon classes but that's not so wild anyone is like hello??? but start the sneaking as you mean to go on] James: [literally gonna spend half her lunch break on-route in the car cos London so we gotta but at least we can say it's an uber mood again so he's not driving] Ava: [I'll do some before 'cos like is he gonna show nerves] Ava: We still on for lunch time? James: nothing else has come up Ava: 👍 Ava: I'll book my ride James: I'll pick you up Ava: Are you sure? James: sure that we don't need 2 separate ubers going to the same place? yes Ava: fair point Ava: but I'll definitely get the coffees then James: no you won't Ava: The post came before I left this morning Ava: you really didn't have to do that Ava: but you did, so I can definitely get you a latte or whatever your particular shade of coffee is James: I didn't want leave you bracelet-less & me close to having a regret James: so I kind of did have to Ava: Well, when you put it like that Ava: thank you, it was one of my favourites actually Ava: didn't wanna push for that regret too hard though James: now you won't have to Ava: The coffee being bitter over the company definitely sounds like a better plan James: you don't have to order coffee, you know Ava: I'll probably get an iced drink of some description Ava: ☀🥵 James: too much sunbathing between classes? Ava: 😏 Ava: I'm sure the dons would say any is too much Ava: but I'm still pretty pale James: I'm correcting that to still pretty Ava: Gonna look like a 🍅 now James: who doesn't like 🍅? James: bloody marys are fantastic for one Ava: Now I know you have good taste James: in drinks at least Ava: and 🍅s thank you James: potentially everything but wives & uni courses Ava: Don't make me laugh because it's definitely not funny James: but hypothetically how smitten would I be if you did laugh? Ava: Oh, head over heels, of course Ava: like 👼s singing James: I thought so Ava: Don't wanna hypothetically disappoint James: it's not even hypothetically possible Ava: Your level of hypothetical trust is cute James: your level of hypothetical modesty is unnecessary Ava: Fine, but it's your fault when I don't fit my hypothetical hat James: I'll buy you a bigger one James: hypothetically Ava: You going to hypothetically redress me piece by piece? James: I'm not falling into the trap of you thinking I'm saying I need to James: there's nothing wrong with how you dress Ava: I'm not even hypothetically that sly Ava: Straightforward and to the point, yeah? James: it's what I like about you Ava: You're pretty good at it yourself James: game playing has never got me anywhere I want to be Ava: Games rely too much on chance and luck for my liking Ava: someone has to lose James: precisely James: as much as I'd potentially hate losing to you less than I would to lots of other people, it's still better as a hypothetical Ava: No games, I promise James: I'm taking that to also mean no more pool at the vault & you can't stop me Ava: 😱 Ava: You're really going to make me enroll just to get back in that VIP venue? Ava: Rude James: 😂 James: seeing you every day would be fun but putting fun ahead of all things academic gets you where I currently am in life James: I can't do that to you, even hypothetically Ava: You can hypothetically follow me for your next course Ava: I'm a great study buddy James: unless you're going abroad somewhere to study Ava: Unless you count SE as abroad Ava: lord knows many of our peers do 🙄 James: in that case, following you sounds close to a good idea Ava: 🤏 Ava: I'll find a way to hypothetically swing it Ava: the world needs your writing, II James: I've never been more devastated to have a job waiting for me that isn't strictly hypothetical Ava: I's doing, I suppose Ava: What are you going do instead of write your great novel about me? James: you'll have to look out for my self published works written by night under an obvious pseudonym Ava: I will Ava: Will you sign my copy? James: of course James: under your printed dedication Ava: I'll have to think of an excellent pseudonym myself James: can you do 1 other, simpler thing for me before then? Ava: I'm sure I can? James: order for me something you like James: I don't know what I want Ava: I like a challenge Ava: Okay James: do you want me to tell you if I don't share the liking of it or not? Ava: 'Course Ava: 'cos I need to find you something you do like James: if time doesn't run out Ava: We can have more lunches too Ava: as well as evenings James: that'd be good James: I'd hate to only see you in the dark Ava: That's mutual James: if I wrote us meeting exclusively at night everyone would assume I'd decided on a vampire novel James: so I'm happy to hear it Ava: I think its making a comeback Ava: and I'd definitely buy you as an Edward Cullen type James: I have no clue if I should be flattered or offended Ava: A potentially complex issue, a complex character beyond the sparkles Ava: I just meant you'd be eligible for dreamboat status James: you're saying I should make a detour to buy the book or download the film to my phone right now or I shouldn't? Ava: Will we have time to watch it together is the real question Ava: Because I have to pop your 🍒 James: is it a 90 minutes is all you need kind of film or 3 hours of lingering close ups? Ava: 126 James: I can do that Ava: Yeah? James: skipping a lecture I have no desire to be in to further my hypothetical masterpiece of a novel in the early stages of its development, that's a fantastic idea Ava: 💡 Ava: Was bound to have one eventually Ava: Let's do it then James: you're claiming not to have had any before now? Ava: In my life, obviously Ava: but with you? 'close to a good idea' is as close as I've got so far James: I won't deny you the opportunity to get closer then Ava: Thank you Ava: You can find out if it's only hypothetical that I'm unable to disappoint James: I feel like I already know that Ava: You've had a taste Ava: but you can have more Ava: if you want it James: I do Ava: Okay Ava: Good James: but it's never going to be as simple as words like okay or good Ava: It could be Ava: I'm not saying all the time Ava: or even that we can always give 126 minutes to it Ava: but whatever we can James: you can't say all the time because I can't ever give you all the time James: I can't give you any more gifts or regular dates or even selfies Ava: I know that Ava: I'm not asking for any of that James: but you should James: because you're free to do whatever you want with whoever you want Ava: Exactly James: why this? Ava: because you need somebody Ava: and I like you James: oh Ava Ava: It is as simple as that James: I'll try that out, see if I can believe it Ava: I know nothing else is but Ava: why not Ava: I want to and you don't need to buy that or promise time you haven't got James: for as long as you want to then Ava: for as long as you need me then James: no because James: my life isn't going to change Ava: James James: you don't know what she's like but I know everything she's ever done or is likely to do Ava: People like that don't stop, I know that Ava: they have to be stopped James: there's no stopping her Ava: Well there's no stopping me either and I'm on your side James: you don't need this Ava: I told you, I like you Ava: I won't just turn my back on you James: I can have this car turned around, you don't have to do anything Ava: Of course I don't have to Ava: and neither do you, not with me Ava: you don't owe me anything, I'm just telling you how it is for me Ava: and I want to see you James: I want to see you too, more than when I originally said it Ava: Good Ava: Then don't turn around, yeah? James: I always do the wrong thing, I don't want to, to you James: so if you don't want me to turn around, I won't Ava: I want you to do what you want, that's all Ava: even if that was turning around, which, undeniably, would be shit but I'd survive Ava: but you wanna come, I'm almost 100% James: understood Ava: Okay Ava: I've got a great urge to tell you I'm not insane but that makes me sound more so so I'll just Ava: 😶 James: you haven't once struck me as being & I have some experience, as it were Ava: That's alright then Ava: It's a comparison I don't need, you either, I'm sure James: just don't insist I marry you & it won't ever need to be made Ava: Easy Ava: Got my word James: if only I had your skill at losing jewellery Ava: It is a talent, definitely; but unteachable? Nah James: now you've got a great urge to teach me something James: okay Ava: So many whims, only so much time Ava: Lucky I'm an excellent teacher James: very novel protagonist-esque, honestly James: you're earning your page space Ava: If fictional me gets slated as dull I'll have to change my pseudonym and run away James: you couldn't be hypothetically dull if you actually tried James: never mind close to anything else Ava: You always know just what to say yet I still believe it sincere James: it is sincere James: from the kings head shaving horror stories until now Ava: I'm confident believing it, and you Ava: because boys who always know what to say always say the wrong things James: maybe 126 minutes later I will have Ava: That's okay Ava: a mix of right and wrong Ava: that's real Ava: anything other and you're definitely up to something Ava: 😇 or 😈 either way James: I gave you a real tour the moment you asked for it, that's 😇 Ava: It felt it James: I'm not going to leave in the middle this time James: strictly end credits Ava: Don't promise Ava: that's practically begging fate James: well that's the last thing I want, my lips are sealed Ava: Your lips are Ava: 😈 James: if that means yours have to be described as 😇 I'm fine with it Ava: See? Ava: You're too good with words James: they're a very prominent feature, I couldn't help but notice Ava: I like that you notice Ava: Do it some more James: because I'm not sure I could stop if you didn't like it, it's a relief that you do Ava: Don't stop Ava: then I don't have to either James: very fair Ava: 😇 James: how far can we push that angelic streak to one side because I'm here early James: can you leave? Ava: Lessons are barely real at this point in the summer term and it isn't as if I've been paying any attention all day so Ava: Give me 10 to 'fake' needing to go lie down James: I'm not having any PTSD symptoms from being here quite yet James: take as long as you require Ava: Honestly Ava: Least it is undeniably too hot for the blazer so I won't trigger you into leaving without me James: I'm undeniably sure the way you wear it wouldn't make me wanna leave Ava: God, you are so distracting and fully aware what you're doing to me right now James: in 10 minutes, or preferably less, you'll have a car to lie down in should you suddenly really need to James: meaning I regret nothing Ava: Bad man Ava: The blush is admittedly helping my case here James: I'm not gonna lie & say if you aren't still wearing that I'll go without you but James: I do want to see it Ava: I'd say there's 0% chance of you not seeing it and a full 100% of me being unable to hide it James: 🍅 right, of course Ava: The dangers of being pale Ava: why I need this tan Ava: obviously James: how far does it go? is 😳 going to colour in your tan lines like a modern art piece James: if so that's a must for my book cover Ava: Well now we have to see how inspiring you find it Ava: even if you can't take any 📸 James: physically no, but mentally I'll take so many Ava: You're too pretty for photographs anyway Ava: you don't even look real in person James: how can you say that about another person when you look like you belong on a chapel ceiling or somewhere equally beautifully crafted? Ava: I Ava: I'm just Ava: on my way James: you can't miss me, the engine's on & the song choices are questionable James: it's very low profile Ava: Got to get the driver onboard, for future 126s James: I'll ask him if he has any knowledge of the Twilight soundtrack Ava: 😂 Ava: It goes hard, FYI James: he looked at me like he's a believer about that James: absolute Ava: Then we won't have to invite him to our viewing party Ava: Thank God James: it'd be taking politeness to new heights James: he is going to play it for us though Ava: I'm gonna tip him so hard James: It's taken care of by me James: you've agreed to hypothetically buy out everything in this coffee place in search of something I'll enjoy so Ava: Okay Ava: so if you're being polite then can I be slightly 😒 at his presence 'cos I really need to be alone with you right now? James: it's a reasonable request James: more so than the one I'd like to ask of you Ava: Go on Ava: There's clearly room and time for the unreasonable James: Ava, I hear how much you don't want to waste any of the borrowed time we're basically forced to be on, but can you please walk slowly for my mental picture gallery Ava: [Does, obviously] James: [😍 clearly as the twilight soundtrack begins to blast from this vehicle so casually] Ava: [and what a mental image that is, doing a mini run at the end 'cos excitement and nerves] James: [it's fine cos we all know he'd have to resist the urge to lowkey drag her into the car despite what he said, looking like you're getting snatched from the school gates lol] Ava: [thank God your teachers are useless and we can but hope there's no window some kid is staring that hard out] James: [just staring at her taking all those mental 📷s again though as soon as she's in] Ava: [the blush is so real and she knows it] James: [if she's blushing already wait until the kiss he initiates because obvs it'd be as hardcore as their first one but like it'd be so much more intense not only cos he wants her more but also because he wants more time to do this now. Everything would be so slow and deliberate like he's gotta savour every possible way he can kiss her and every possible tiny reaction each thing he does has] Ava: [well enjoy boy because she will be dying in all the ways like there's no hiding from the casual anticipation that has built up here] James: [they both just die there and then #plot twist] Ava: [or this driver reports you 'cos you've just picked up someone from school and started getting it on lmao, luckily you not being paid to think so shh] James: [oh my god imagine, please just drive and groove to the epic bops thank you sir] Ava: [she's 17 now we're so fine lollol] James: [he does not know that but I hope James does] Ava: [he's done a stalk, her bday wasn't that long ago in the feed] James: [true, I hope you had an epic bday babe] Ava: [no doubt baby, so we've got a pretty good plan of their afternoon plans, is there anything else we wanna say went down?] James: [good question, realistically they'd probably run out of time but also I am highkey so I'm like give them forever lol] Ava: [I assume he usually picks Jay up from School 'cos unless Chloe wanna turnt up at the gates why would she, so that'd be 3.30 say so they've got from 1ish, Chloe would still have the baby and thinks he's in class so we do have a fair whack of time] James: [not gonna let you waste all of that trying everything on a coffee shop menu, don't worry guys] Ava: [although a moment you need all the moments] James: [gotta find him something he genuinely likes cos his missus be ordering for him everywhere they go] Ava: [oat milk flat white] James: [chin chin gals] Ava: [But yeah I don't think we need a Chloe interruption this time 'cos he'll have a time he has to go anyway so suck it bitch] James: [there will be plenty of opportunities to do more of them anyway] Ava: [when your wife is controlling and crazy] Ava: [I was thinking for when we get the whole 'I don't think Jay is his' moment rolling, maybe if she finds out he's cheating again or whatever she does the typical 'she ain't even yours!' and maybe she's done it before so James just thinks she's bullshitting 'cos she's crazy but Ava is like hmm shall we like explore that though 'cos it's not 'neither of them are yours' it's always just Jay] James: [that is actually perfect though] Ava: ['cos it can escalate when she inevitably finds out it's Ava 'cos sleuthing or maybe at some point they wanna be out 'cos fuck it and she's taking it way more personal than any other girl and it's like why though so then the Buster link can come out even if she accidentally drops it 'cos so mad] James: [we all know Chloe is that bitch 100%] Ava: [🙌] James: [do we wanna do any more convo like once he had to leave or shall we post it and move on] Ava: [I'll do a lil bit 'cos straightforward, highkey and cute tbh] James: [allowing it] Ava: I hope I didn't make you late at all Ava: and that your girls like the Twilight soundtrack James: if they don't they've inherited their mother's bad taste & they've got bigger problems ahead than me being a few minutes late Ava: Obviously Ava: but I'm just saying, don't be too disappointed, no one can like it as much as you 😏 James: I don't believe that you don't like it as much as me Ava: It is more than just a hypothetical that I enjoyed myself Ava: soundtrack included but not my favourite part James: I couldn't possibly be disappointed by anything else knowing that Ava: Disappointment is not in my vocabulary right now James: you won't need to add it back in on my behalf Ava: I believe that James: when can I see you again? Ava: You tell me Ava: There are four more films James: 4? Ava: They split the last book into two, such a gimmick but you know James: I promise not to do that when I write yours Ava: Well, if I get to play myself maybe I won't mind the exposure 🤔 James: I'm not sure that I want to play myself James: in which case I would mind the increased screentime you'd then have with whoever does Ava: There's no finding anyone else with eyes as blue as yours Ava: Gonna blow the special effects budget James: 😂 Ava: I'm so serious Ava: and jealous James: I'll describe your eyes as bluer & your skin as more tan, if you like Ava: I like your candor, remember Ava: More than I'd like to be remembered as tanned and having the bluest eyes James: I'd like to remember you exactly as you are Ava: Don't say we have to leave it that long to see each other again James: not quite Ava: My parents have a 4-day business trip Fri-Mon, you could come over at some point then? James: the weekend is not going to happen but I can make Monday work James: Friday possibly Ava: Okay Ava: Not quite coffee shop level but we've got all sorts for you to try out James: you sounded like your brother then, almost James: not that he's ever propositioned me in exactly the same way Ava: Awkward Ava: I'll try and avoid that then😬😂 James: awkward will be if your parents haven't decorated since I was last there Ava: Thankfully they have Ava: and I haven't insisted on taking his room James: or your sister's? Ava: Spent loads of time in there too? Ava: no, I've got my own room James: not with her, obviously James: but you know how parties tend to overspill into every room Ava: 'Course James: are you going to have one? Ava: Undecided Ava: I'll have some people over at the weekend but it might be pretty chill James: is Teddy included in the some people? Ava: I don't know Ava: Would you like him not to be or? James: I don't know Ava: I get that it could be weird Ava: It's strange thinking how close you used to be with Buster James: but that was basically another life James: for me & for him Ava: Yeah Ava: well, I don't have to invite him, like I said, I don't even know what I fancy doing yet James: it's up to you Ava: I know Ava: It's James: it's not my business, Ava James: I shouldn't have asked Ava: No Ava: It's not not Ava: I know things are complex but I don't feel bad for her, you know Ava: I don't feel bad for doing it James: me either but not only because of the no regrets thing Ava: So it just feels weird to feel like guilty or something around your brother when I'm not Ava: He doesn't need to know and won't but it doesn't need to be any weirder than it would be if I dated any of my friend's siblings under more 'normal' circumstances James: understood Ava: Yeah? Ava: It's hard to explain James: I'm following it Ava: Not saying we are dating or Ava: you know James: I can't have a girlfriend, but if I could Ava: Really James: you'd be a good choice Ava: but I ain't James: why not? Ava: I don't know Ava: never mind James: Ava Ava: Ignore me, I don't know what I mean Ava: It's not important James: I don't want to ignore you Ava: Okay Ava: but we can talk about other things James: any topic you want Ava: Hmm Ava: Tempting but vague James: I assumed you'd prefer it over boring & specific Ava: A fair assumption Ava: What are you doing tonight though, ell me about your boring and specific James: I can't pinpoint specific dad duties as such, not with these two James: I could be gluing a doll house back together or walking an imaginary dog Ava: A handyman and a dogwalker Ava: either way, never a dull moment James: & that's without factoring in the possibility I could be dragged to a dinner party or subjected to guests arriving expecting champagne & nibbles with no prior knowledge or warning James: on any night James: how are you spending yours? Ava: Of course Ava: Expect no less from this town's leading socialite Ava: I've been summoned to a catch-up and 'homework' sesh as I didn't get back for last period Ava: the amount of messages, assumedly missed the second coming 🤷 James: I'm surprised you're not assumed to be too 'sick' to go James: maybe you shouldn't play yourself in my film either Ava: 😧 Ava: Um rude Ava: Maybe you need to try harder to make me 🍅 James: starting Friday or starting now? James: because how I would in person is not what I'm going to be able to do here Ava: Admittedly both sound intriguing James: so let's do both James: [sends her some kind of 💣🔥 sext because words are all they have as we all know what'll happen if you start sending pics, then she will and it's a whole dangerous thing] Ava: Oh Ava: and I was trying to avoid the cliche of telling you I missed you already James: there's no need to dismiss every cliche off hand James: some of them are good Ava: Some of them are very good Ava: remember when you write your book James: you'll remind me, right? James: I think we can assume too that writer's block isn't one of the enjoyable cliches Ava: I'll do my best Ava: Some protagonist I'd be otherwise James: very fair James: I'll do mine, in turn Ava: I have every faith in your way with words Ava: You've not gone wrong there yet James: [sends her another text because why not obvs, not like you're a busy man with a fam having an affair or anything] Ava: [God bless the multitask] Ava: James James: yes? Ava: It's going to be a really hard wait 'til Monday James: I'll fit you in Friday James: even if it's only an hour Ava: If you're gonna make it sound like a dentist appointment 😏 James: not the most original excuse but it'd still get you out of school Ava: Cheek 😂 Ava: My excuses are A* James: I don't doubt it James: but I don't want to find out by having you use any on me Ava: Just for you James: okay James: there's no excuses needed to keep posting selfies, is there? so I'll see you every day until Friday actually Ava: Of course Ava: Be dead suspect if I didn't tbh Ava: Can you post one? Ava: Even if you're in the background fulfilling whatever role is required at that precise moment James: for you, I will Ava: 😊 James: look out for it Ava: No.1 fan right here James: you're joking but you're not wrong Ava: Am I? 👀🤔 James: aren't you? Ava: I'll never tell Ava: Got to keep some mystery or who's gonna want to turn the page James: oh you want a mystery at the heart of this James: I see Ava: Does that not gel with your plan for the plot? James: I'll incorporate it after a quick brainstorm Ava: Hot James: 😈 Ava: Mhmm James: you're hot, I'm just lucky Ava: How so? James: to get to spend any time with you Ava: Oh please Ava: You're very good company James: most people are capable of being for a few hours Ava: Who do you know? Ava: Have to introduce me 😏 James: 😂 do you mind if I don't? Ava: I think I'll manage James: I'm happy to hear it Ava: For now, I need to be filled in on the gossip Ava: tell you if any of it is story-worthy James: do your work too please James: I'd like to follow you to a good uni Ava: Are you telling me what to do now? Ava: Don't hate that James: it's a nicely worded suggestion for now Ava: Noted 😇 James: you're going to be good then? Ava: I promised I'd be no trouble James: I know you did Ava: And I'll try really, really hard to keep that promise Ava: even if you make that difficult James: I'm trying really hard not to get in the car & come find you James: I don't think I have to tell you how difficult that is Ava: Damn responsibilities Ava: We can have all Monday though Ava: think about that when it gets tough Ava: I will James: I am Ava: 💙

[chriswhitewolf]

Story Time

Content warnings for vague mentions of kidnapping, physical harm, SA, rape, guns & hypothetically shooting people, and the stuff women (and AFAB people & people perceived as women) have to go through in America.

So, my Dad, my mom, myself, my brother, and his girlfriend were in the kitchen just standing around the island talking. And I didn't hear what my dad said, but i suddenly heard my mom - my brothers gf start talking about like. Holding car keys between their fingers when walking to their car in case someone tries to attack them.

And my mom mentioned how she'll have her phone in one hand, opened to his contact information and with her finger hovering over the Call button before she'll leave a store to get to her car if she's alone, especially at night. And I jumped in and said how I'll check the backseat before sitting down in the driver's seat cause people hide there and attack when they're already driving and closed in in that confined space, and my mom goes "yeah! And I'll discreetly check under the car as I'm walking up" and I'm like "yep! In case someone's hiding under there. And if I can I'll park beside a curb so I can step into the car without standing within slashing distance" and my dad's visibly confused so we're like oh people will hide there and slash your Achilles tendon in your ankle so you can't run away and they can kidnap you, and he's like "okay but when has that ever happened?" And we, all three of us, go A LOT and he's like "none of you personally know anyone who's had that happen to them" and we said no, but that's not the point. The point is it DOES happen, and fairly often, so we have to do this stuff because we know it could happen to us at any moment and we have to be prepared if we stand any chance of surviving or escaping.

And my mom looks him in the eye and says:

Ask any woman you know and she will tell you she is on guard 24/7 against this same stuff, they'll probably all tell you they do these things we're talking about too.

And at that point my dad gets kinda quiet. But us three AFAB people keep just talking, and for us its really just a casual conversation because this stuff is so ingrained in out every day lives. My brothers gf mentions how men will put papers under the windshield wipers because women will stop to get it off before getting in their car and it gives them an opening to grab her.

And the conversation continues and my dad cracks a few jokes that don't derail the conversation but mostly has just gone really quiet. And to me, it seemed like he was making the jokes to try and deflect from the topic and was shutting down and not communicating because he wanted the conversation to end, because it made him uncomfortable to be faced with the reality we live in.

Between his privilege as a cishet white man, and the way this realization would bring to his recognition how some of the things he says as "jokes" are harmful, and the realization that he can't protect my mom and I from harm because he can't be with us 24/7 and we're needing protection from and defense against things he never in his wildest imaginings would've thought of, he was being confronted with something he didn't want to see and didn't know how to handle and wasn't comfortable with recognizing.

My dad is very much someone who would do anything to keep other people from physically harming my mom and I. He threatened, and was fully committed to, shooting my rapist in the kneecaps, and did not care if he would go to jail for it. My mom had to keep him from attempting to track my rapist down to do so.

So I think, for him, the realization that there's never a moment (when we're awake) where my mom and I aren't at least vaguely on guard and prepared to fight tooth and nail against threats he never knew existed, and that we have to live in that state of constant hypervigilence, and that he could never, not ever be able to keep us safe from the hundreds of dangers we're at risk from ever second of the day, was a reality he does not know how to handle and does not want to face because it hurts him. I think that, if he truly admitted that we live the way we do and deal with these things, it would break some part of him and tear him apart emotionally, so he isn't willing to admit it because he doesn't know how to handle that reality and doesn't really know how to or want to have to piece himself together in the aftermath of the emotional breakdown it'd cause.

So he tried to deflect by making jokes and trying to make light of the situation. And when that didn't work, because for us three it WAS a normal casual topic of conversation because we do have this ingrained in every moment of our daily lives, he did what he could to try and shut the conversation down without outright saying to stop talking about it or abruptly walking away. Because if he did either of those it'd be a topic that'd be circled back to later to try and see if he's okay or what was going on for him, and he doesn't want it brought back up cause he doesn't want to have to face it.

And I get it, I do. I can understand how it's easier for him to pretend it doesn't exist and not have to deal with the overwhelming and unpleasant emotions of it.

But I also know that at some point he will have to admit that this is the world we live in, deal with the difficult emotions and adjustment of perception, and I wish he would prioritize understanding, in some small way, what my mom and I deal with and possibly becoming a better ally to women everywhere for it, over not dealing with the difficult process of coping with what it really means that this is the reality of the situation.

#feminism #trigger warning #SA #Mentions of Rape #mentions of guns #There's More Than One America #Male Privilege

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Planning a romantic weekend away

Jimmy: Gracie came at me earlier. There was mistletoe up and I near fully hit the floor 😎 Jimmy: Hold fire though. She only wanted to tell me to convince you of summat. Pretty sure you already know what it is Janis: Erm...Father Christmas is really real? That her weave isn't from dead Brazilian hookers? Janis: Enlighten me or I'll tell her she's got a holiday free pass on you 😈 Jimmy: Double date. Need I say more 😡 Janis: FUCK. I DIDN'T THINK IT'D ACTUALLY HAPPEN. Janis: How far does she expect the season of goodwill to extend, like? Already got some poor cunt being a charitable home for her arse so she don't freeze Janis: Single tear. Janis: Question is, can we make it worth it enough for us to endure that shite? Hmm Jimmy: I almost got my arse to church so it wouldn't. Shoulda sucked off that priest when he asked. Too late? Jimmy: You better get me a top notch pressie, baby 😏 Janis: You know you ain't on the nice list 😉 Janis: So, Santa might be dissing but you'll be getting something extra special from me Janis: As for God, and his holly jolly perverted following, I reckon we're both shit out of 🍀 there, no matter how good our head game is, such is life Janis: Grah, I hear she does shoutouts now...want that 'influencer' clout, baby? Not double entendre my end but might be for GracieGuru 🙊😂 Jimmy: what the fuck we going to do then? No way I'm hanging with her and her latest 'boo boy' Jimmy: Even if I was getting paid, which is likely since she just loves common grounds Janis: Preaching to the choir, dickhead, ain't my idea of a good time either, or hers let's be fucking real. She just wants to dry-hump a slab of boy in front of you on the off chance that really gets you going for her Janis: You wouldn't call her brainy, bless Janis: Idk, don't worry about it, Jim. Just avoid her/the flat whites like the plague and I'll have to literally run away like I'm an angsty 12 year old so we can't be located, even with friend finder or whatever they stalk each other with Janis: Oooh! Just call me brains, we should pretend to have a romantic weekend away planned, that'll send her over the edge, that is her everything goals Janis: Like I said, I can hide from a hoe Jimmy: I knew there was a reason I kept you about Jimmy: Let's do it though. Easier to take than fake the 'gram Jimmy: Any ideas? 🤔 Jimmy: Most of my boltholes are far from yours and not very enviable for that crowd #it'sgrimupnorth Janis: Yeah, why do you tbh? Janis: Now its clear my sister has got no respect for anyone on her hunt for dick/self-esteem Janis: She's hoping its a twofer like Janis: I don't know if I can stand you for that long, darling Janis: But I SUPPOSE your the lesser of two evils here 😉 Jimmy: It's love 💕 Jimmy: Come on, it'll be a laff. I'll get the beers in Jimmy: You can try harder to beat me at darts and pool Janis: As far as the adoring fans/salty haterz are concerned Janis: and that's all that matters Janis: bitch i don't have to try! 😤 you put me off last time with ur mooning 😍 Janis: we don't need to convince the old fellas in the boozer Jimmy: Fuck off I was getting practice in! Jimmy: If you're ready to fake a break up say the word but until then, it takes a lot of work to give you the puppy dog eyes. I'm not Twix Janis: Sure you was 😂 Janis: N'awwh but you do it so well! Janis: Audition for the School play whilst ur at it, soft lad Jimmy: I do enough fake snogging without signing myself up for that bollocks Jimmy: You coming away with me then or not? Jimmy: You know your sister'll be in again nagging before shift's end Janis: Well, when you put it like that Janis: 😒 Janis: I ain't got nothing better to do, and I certainly ain't third wheeling her fake date Janis: My grandparents got a place down skerries Janis: we can crash there Jimmy: How many rooms they got? My dad's working so I'll have to bring the ramble with Jimmy: #goals I know Janis: Fucking hell, my pissing sister! She owes you more than she's spending on coffee for the hassle she's causing Janis: If you really can't, don't worry, I'll sort her. She'll be unbearable when she finds out it was all for a laugh but it was at her expense so how much of a mug can she actually make me feel? 😑 Janis: That said, there's 3 rooms, its only a caravan don't get excited but the kids would probably be buzzin', it is pretty nice down there Janis: I'll even let you have the double bed to yourself Janis: ol Janis: l Jimmy: It'll stop them nagging me about going somewhere other than the park that'll do me Jimmy: Cass talks big but she isn't even really so doable Jimmy: Don't be getting any ideas though 😍😉 my brother hasn't slept well since we moved. I'll be sharing that double like it or not Jimmy: What a way to spend my first proper time off since I started #blessed Janis: Yeah, fish and chips on the beach even tho its fucking baltic, chasing Twix will keep 'em warm, you'll earn major big brother points as well as bae ones Janis: What a mighty fine man Janis: Same here, Cass. Shh about it though Janis: Like you said, it'll be a laugh, we can make it one Janis: You'd really rather be making pinkity drinkidies or whatever the fuck they are? Jimmy: Nope. But your 1st romantic break usually is. Any talent there is in all grans playing bingo? Jimmy: Be nice to get something off the 'gram 💋 Janis: I ain't been since I was about 9 Janis: I wasn't after bitches then and I ain't now Janis: I wish you luck, 2 kids hanging on your arm and a woman back home, like Janis: Does it for some. Jimmy: I'd do some talking first to get things clear I'm not tall Tammy 😂 Jimmy: Bet you were a right cute kid, weren't you? Aww Janis: Again, have fun explaining that one, mate. I'd struggle with the concept and I'm in on it. Janis: Adorable. What happened? Jimmy: Shut up you know what you look like, mate Janis: A butch lezza? Janis: So I've been told 👍 Jimmy: That's not what they are saying anymore. Check my comments sometime. The lads are gagging for you now Janis: Goody gumdrops. Janis: I'll leave my knickers at the door, like Jimmy: You could like. I've been waiting for you to drop me as your fake bf since this whole thing started Janis: I'm not interested in any of them. Janis: Would your world be set alight by Aaron O'Reilly from form? Janis: If you wanna cop off with some of your fans don't let me stop you Jimmy: You aren't. They're not my type anymore than Aaron's yours. I'm just saying you take a crackin pic and I should know since I'm the one takin 'em. So you don't need to spout that crap. They're just jealous of how much of a butch lezza you aren't Janis: Alright. Well, you're not half bad at taking snaps, and not in the bullshit way every hoe thinks they know their angles and magic lighting these days, you're actually decent. Janis: It don't feel like crap when Janis: blah, meant to delete that, ignore it Jimmy: 🤐 Jimmy: Wanna help me with my art project while we're away then? Kill all the birds (hopefully not with my flash) Jimmy: I'll owe you again Janis: I won't even joke on you for being a swot 🤓🤞 Janis: What've you got planned? Jimmy: I haven't had any time to think yet beyond film being the medium but Jimmy: #workinprogress Jimmy: with a muse like you m'dear how could I go wrong 💕 Janis: 😜 Janis: just so you know, i ain't bringing any homework but put my name or yours, yeah? 😘 not even in art but might count for something Janis: clue me in tho, brainiac, what do the kiddos like? i'll get 'em something Jimmy: Rookie mistake mate, art's an easy A Jimmy: They'll take anything covered in sugar. Can't say I'll love you for it when they crash mid journey though Janis: Only 'cos you're good at it. With my genes I should be but I can barely draw a stickman. Janis: I'll stick with double sports, sports science and science 👌 Janis: I'll keep sweets in stock for bribery, goes without sayin'! Different pocket to Twix' fish treats, though Janis: I'll have a look down town Jimmy: 😂 did you see that article doin the rounds about the mum who bought her kid a cat's advent calendar Janis: 😂 Yes! Shame catnip don't work like on us like it does cats, that kid would be pingin' Janis: Might get meself some, like Jimmy: What gets dogs off their heads? I'll keep Twix well clear Jimmy: She's high enough on your 😍 Janis: I don't know, actually...telling them they're good bois? Janis: Works for you boo 😘 Jimmy: I prefer being called a very bad boy 😎 Janis: You clown 😂 Janis: Good to know, suppose. Dirty weekend away though it ain't Jimmy: what our fans don't know won't break their jealous hearts Jimmy: you coming in for your freebies today or shall I do a delivery your way once Grace is home? 😉 Janis: Kick it really cliche and be my sexy delivery boy Janis: Try and bring something with sausage in so I can come at you with the quality porn writing Jimmy: Live your fantasies as well as your sister's if you want, my name tag says Jonathon today Janis: Ooh, spicing it up with some roleplay like we're middle-aged okay Janis: How boring are you that you've picked a name so similar to your own...this is why we've hit a dry patch, Jimothy! Jimmy: What would you seriously pick? Janis: For you? Janis: Who's a fittie... Janis: Anthony Joshua could get it Janis: You don't want to be in the play but reckon you can stretch to that? Jimmy: Next time I lose my name tag I'll insist on that. For the bae 💕 Jimmy: About as close as I'll get I think Janis: Who do you want? Janis: I wanna know your type Janis: Bar Tall Tammy Jimmy: Your sister obviously Janis: Fuck off, not even funny Janis: If that were true, you know where she lives bitch, I ain't stopping ya, she's practically shoe-horning you in 🤢 Jimmy: I meant the fit older one 😉 Janis: Ohhh Janis: Still, do one 🖕 I'm not pretending to be my sister you freak Jimmy: That's one pretense too far. Got it 😂 Janis: Yeah, in this hypothetical you've really shit the bed, pal. Jimmy: I only half read that because #customers and thought you called me shit in bed mate Janis: well... 😏 Jimmy: I fake rocked your world Janis Cavante! 😂 Janis: you know we faked it so i didn't have to fake it 💅 Jimmy: Aaron O'Reilly's walking through the door want me to slip him your number and end this? 😝 Janis: I will murder you. Janis: also he might think your trying to set up a threeway for YOUR benefit, so if you wanna take over the gay rumours that bad, go for it 💋🍆 Jimmy: I've seen you with a pool cue I think I'm safe Jimmy: Give a shit. At least I actually am butch Janis: Psh, you're all show no grow Janis: We're arm wrestling, then you'll see Jimmy: 💪 I'll beat you at that too then, shall I? 🏆 Janis: Bring it on. I won't make you cry too hard, save face in front of the kiddos. Janis: 'Let' them kick your arse too 😜 Jimmy: Try it, baby girl 😝 Jimmy: Cass probs could no lie. Scrappy af that one Janis: Good girl 👍 Janis: Gotta keep you in check Jimmy: Doubt you'll be calling her that when she's shadowed you all weekend Jimmy: She loves you. Who knows why? Janis: I keep telling you I'm a delight Janis: Has this...how long has it been? Month, 2? Of SHEER BLISS taught you nothing Janis: Ruuuuude. Jimmy: Nope. I'm with Team Bobby. You're a gross meanie Jimmy: As all girls are 😂 Janis: Well I'm winning Bobby 'round this weekend by hook or by crook Janis: then you can please yourself, billy no mates Janis: Team Janis 💪 Jimmy: Every bro knows you can't be friends with your girl Jimmy: DUH Janis: Oh yeah, all straight couples HATE each other and that's #goals Janis: If I can't be chatting shit on you, how will I get to talk about you constantly to my gals? Janis: Singing your praises? I THINK NOT Jimmy: Speaking of, Gracie and co are back on the premise that Tall Tammy left her....something. I wasn't listening. Should I break the news we won't be here for date night or do you want to do the honors Janis: Dignity? That's long gone, honey. Janis: Ooh, lemme do it, you're coming round with the sausage anyway Janis: We can do it together baby Jimmy: awhhh Jimmy: I've hidden the mistletoe but she can see the top of the highest counters!! I'm on borrowed time what do I do? Janis: Headbutt her in the teeth Janis: 'Accidentally' Janis: Can't help being a normal-sized human Jimmy: #customerservice Jimmy: then recommend her our chewy cookies 😂 Janis: You can see why I'm not trying to be your work wifey too, yeah? 😂 Janis: If you can convince any of those girls to break their diet, I'll be impressed Janis: Don't count if they go vom in the bogs after tho Jimmy: Gracie might be on her way already. One of her posse asked what you were getting me for Christmas and I didn't hold back Janis: Oh no, am I about to get slut-shamed? 😲 Janis: Or, heaven forfend, tips Janis: I will die Jimmy: Damn I didn't think of that. Sorry Janis: Its cool Janis: She's all mouth anyway, not in a beneficial to the cause way Janis: Be interesting hearing what she thinks you want, keep ya posted lol Jimmy: 🙌 Can't wait Janis: that's what you're meant to say about my present! Jimmy: I did, swear 🤞 Janis: what do you actually want Jimmy: Don't worry about it Janis: Oh, is it? If I'm not fucking your brains out you're not interested Janis: Fine then, save my reddies. 👍 Jimmy: That's what I was thinking. Stage a break up before 🎄 for max drama and min spends Janis: Cool. If you wanna. Janis: Just don't tell everyone you chucked me 'cos I wouldn't give it up. Already a frigit. Janis: What's the story then? Jimmy: Obviously not. We've been hooking up for ages got to keep it #goals Jimmy: I don't know haven't thought that far ahead it just makes sense to get out before gifting Janis: Yeah. Fair. Janis: Think on and let me know Jimmy: You too. We can brainstorm at the weekend. Nothing but time then Jimmy: Can't break up right after the break though Janis: Would look sus, yeah. Janis: Maybe I'll whup you one too many times, your fragile male ego can't hack it, eh? Jimmy: Grace'd be smug 😩 Jimmy: Can't even fake that, babe Jimmy: Nobody'd believe the story Janis: She's gonna be regardless Janis: I got the shitty end of the stick here like but ain't nowt we can do about it now Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: No we're goals we just burned too bright that's all 😂 Jimmy: You've got way more time served with me than she does any of her boos she doesn't win Janis: Mhmm. Calm down, Icarus. Sure you'll be comparing some other bint on a balcony to the sun in no time. 😘 Janis: Suppose so. Least hers are real, if not short-lived, and, well, shit. Janis: She won't know the difference anyway Jimmy: There's nobody like you 💕 Jimmy: Exactly I'm not going to tell her we weren't real Janis: Bullshit 💕 Janis: True enough, I'll take it. Jimmy: Shit gotta go the boss is back Jimmy: Love you 💕 Janis: Love you too, Jonathon 💕

#mad he wanna end it #hmm i wonder why bitch #this was good