#no. shit happened. it was real. not funny.

[ihateornithologists]

#elisabeth das musical #and things that happened to me irl xD #i finally did thissss #it's so funny to do actually and it almost works like sort of therapy so why not #like wow i can finally talk about this and even draw related things without wanting to throw up immediately #for more context (yep again) i had severe depression years ago and at some point my brain was so fucked up by illness that #i started seeing [one of those guys i'm always talking about] literally as an embodiment of everything bad in my life #well HE WAS #but like i so strongly identified him with my depression that sometimes even doubted if he was a real person at all lmao #(YOU SEE WHY I'M DRAWING THIS) #he somehow managed to follow me everywhere which made things even more creepy. #and i kept coming back to him myself because i had no one else etc #so funny actually that he was literally JUST SOME GUY like not even interesting or anything #all this shit was just awful and gross that's all. #but when i realized i can make it look COOL by drawing stuff i felt so powerful ahsdijwhnu8 #like YES i texted him recently and he's just. boring as fuck. #so dumb to feel possessed by some evil entity for years and the said evil entity is just a random dude #SORRY my traumadumping is cringe af but thats the price you have to pay to see my drawings xDddd

[riacte]

It's funny that I remember in MCC S2B / S3, people were getting concerned about the longevity of MCC and the imbalance between for fun / competitiveness but none of the solutions seemed to work and everyone was like "yeah, unfortunately it is what it is" then Noxcrew comes in like a wrecking ball like "what if we removed numbers. lmao" and the community goes 👀

Noxcrew I am watching your career with mild interest. Yesss burn the ultra Reddit-esque sweatiness / constant comparsion to the ground. Yessss bring back the silliness of MCC. After all the shit that's been happening in the broader mcyt community for the past year, MCC comeback real?

#ria.txt #mcc

[chris-continues]

Cool, feel free to joke about the tragedy of today but know that several children in the daycare at the base of the towers, their parents who worked there, first responders trying to help, and roughly 800 people in the 4 planes had to choose between being burnt alive or falling to their own deaths because it was faster.

#tw death #Chris continues #it gets on my nerves #9/11 #9/11 attacks #it isn’t funny #I saw a meme #thought it was cute #great #esp w my gen (genz) #too young to remember or not even born yet #people are rather insensitive about it #people lost their lives. and it’s not something avoidable or stupid or amusing #or even partly humorous or laughable #like a bunch of other dumb incidents #no. shit happened. it was real. not funny. #dark humor is one thing but idk #it just #it hurts. #not targeted

[phantom-0-writer]

prompt 02: tim’s birthday present

Tim sat in his empty house at the empty dining table. The table was actually quite large; it had enough seats to sit at least 15 people. But there was just Tim there. 

His parents had promised and sworn up and down that they would come back in time for his birthday. He had everything planned out. He picked out the birthday cake, put on the candles, decorated, ordered his parents' favorite foods, his parents' favorite movie for movie night, popcorn the likes. But that morning, just when Tim was double checking to make sure everything was ready for the most perfect birthday ever, his parents had called to tell him that something really important had come up, and they wouldn’t be able to make it. Tim figured it was better than last year, at least they called this time. 

Tim stared down at the cake, the candles lit. He had heard online that people would make wishes on their birthday cake and blow it out. Tim thought that was a weird thing to do, but it wouldn’t hurt to try. 

What should he wish for? It would have to be something special that he doesn’t already have. Tim thought for a long moment, the candles bleeding into the frosting of the cake. 

A brother. 

Tim closed his eyes and put his hands together like he’s seen the other children to do in the cartoons. And Tim wished for a big brother. When he finally wished hard enough (whatever that meant) he opened his eyes and blew out what was left of the candles. 

Tim waited. What exactly was he supposed to do now? In the cartoons, everyone would celebrate and cheer and the birthday boy would open his presents. There wasn’t anyone to cheer for Tim, or any presents for him to open. 

Suddenly the house shook, and the loud sound of a crash sound came from the backyard. Quickly, Tim did the sensible thing and go check out what the noise was. That's what the characters always did in horror movies. 

In Tim’s backyard, there was what looked like a weird space ship that had crashed into his backyard. There wasn’t any fire or anything, but the spaceship looked pretty wrecked. Getting closer, Tim could vaguely make out that someone was inside the spaceship. Looking around, he saw what looked like maybe the handle. Tim couldn’t really tell. 

When Tim put his hand on it and tried to open it, something poked out mechanically and pricked his finger. He flinched back instinctively, caressing his finger tip.

“Recognized: Danny Fenton. System Override.” A robotic lady spoke. Who is Danny Fenton? As if to answer him, the space ship opened its hatch, and inside was an unconscious black haired teenager. “System Malfunctioning. Please Assis-” The robotic voice spoke again, before getting cut off as if the power had died. 

Suddenly, Tim remembered his wish. A big brother. 

This was Danny Fenton, and he was supposed to be Tim’s big brother

----

When Danny woke up, he found himself in a very soft plush something. Something that definitely wasn’t the Spector Speeder. Alarmed, he sat up quickly to find that he didn’t recognize where he was at all. He also didn’t recognize the weird kid that was staging at him from two feet away. 

“Hi, I’m Tim. Timothy Drake.” The boy introduced himself almost business like. 

“Uh, hi Tim.” Danny responded awkwardly. “You got any idea where I am?” Danny sat up properly, moving the blanket (?) off of him and turned to face the weird and kinda creepy kid. 

“You’re in Drake Manor. Which is where I live.” He answered again. 

“Ok…ay” Danny nodded thoughtfully. “Any idea how I got here?” Truthfully, Danny hadn’t really been expecting an answer, but he still got one. 

“Because I made a birthday wish to have a big brother.” He answered in the same way he had answered the other question, very matter-of-factly. 

“Ok- Wait. What?” Danny asked, doing a double take at Tim. 

“You’re supposed to be my big brother, right?” Tim was starting to look a little hesitant, and as weirded out as Danny felt he couldn’t help but feel bad about the whole situation. 

“Where are your parents, Tim?” 

“There not home, because they had really important things to do for work.” 

Danny nodded. “Do you know when they’ll be back?” 

Tim shook his head. “They were supposed to come back today, because it’s my birthday. But they said they couldn’t make it.” 

Well, shit. Didn’t that sound awfully like Danny’s birthdays before he had given up on his parents showing up. At least he had Jazz. This kid looked like he was alone. 

Not liking the silence, Tim started fidgeting again. “So, are you gonna be my brother, then?” 

And what was Danny supposed to say, No? Besides, if he was really causing problems being in this random universe, then Clockwork would figure it out. 

Bonus: 

Danny sat at Tim’s dinner table, the kid looking at him radiating in excitement, each with a plate of stupid expensive pasta in front of them. “You said your name was Tim, right?” Danny started thoughtfully. Tim nodded, drinking up everything Danny said. “Well, first course of action as you, big brother. I need to give you a nickname.” 

Tim’s eyes sparkled at the prospect. “Like what?”

Danny tapped his chin exaggeratedly, “Hm… Tim, Tim.” Turing the name around while he absentmindedly twirled his fork between his fingers, Danny wondered what he should come up with. Suddenly, in a misplaced strength, Danny’s fork flew out of his hand. 

Before Danny could even say anything, “I’ll get you a new one!” Tim offered quickly. Getting up from his chair, his foot got tangled behind the leg of the chair and Tim fell quietly on the floor with an oof. 

Danny laughed at him. “You okay, Timbers?” He asked, getting up to check on the boy. 

“Yeah, I like Timbers.” Tim said, a bright smile on his face despite the blossoming bruise on his arm.

------------

table of contents

#dc x dp prompt #dpxdc #danny and tim #danny phantom #tim drake #be kinda funny if tim was like so convinced that wishes were real and all that and starts dabbling in magic at a pretty early age or smt #big brother danny #they had pretty similar childhood and like shit is danny gonna let that happen to another kid on his watch #tim: what a funny coincidence #danny: what a funny coincidence #clockwork watching this all go down: hehehe just like i planned #also yes the spector speeder dna matched tim as danny #which means that tim in alternate danny #i thought it would be a fun little thing to add since they had similar childhoods in this au

[moongothic]

The worst part about trying to figure out what Crocodile's deal is that because he's so fucking irredeemably evil in Alabasta... Like... Yeah he's just irredeemably evil. Like I love him but he did cause countless casualties, a ton of pain and suffering and literally attempted to blow up a million people

Like no amount of theoretical "trying to do it to save his son from the Government" or "trying to stop the Government from hurting anyone else" or just "doing it for the greater good" is going to make him any less of a mass murderer

But also Robin absolutely 100% helped with all of that shit simply because she wanted to read the Poneglyph for herself.

No amount of her intending to betray Crocodile from the begining and sabotaging his plans erases the fact that Robin also caused countless people to starve to death and die in the civil war. Her sabotages only succeeded out of sheer luck, and only spared the lives of the people at the final battle. She has the blood of countless innocents on her hands. Because she wanted to read history.

But her crimes were swept under the rug because she has a sad backstory and her sabotages worked out just at the nick of time by sheer dumb luck

So Croc??? Just??? Is there a chance??? At all???

But also he did literally intend to sell Buggy into slavery

Like, fuck Buggy, but jesus

What's also killing me is that we like. Don't know what Luffy thinks of Crocodile right now. Which really is like. The thing that will decide how we, as the readers, are supposed to feel about Crocodile. Luffy is our POV

Like we don't know what Luffy's opinion of Crocodile is after he helped save Luffy (and spared Ace once) during the Summit War. Like Luffy clearly fucking hated the man in Impel Down and the two interactions they had during the War weren't like positive (in the sense that Luffy himself didn't think of the interactions as particularly positive. Defending Whitebeard from being attacked once and then being like "wait what HIM?!" when Crocodile defended Ace. To be fair, in the midst of the chaos, there wasn't much time to spend on Pondering On Such Things because Ace needed to be saved, and Oda goes out of his way to not show us what's going on inside Luffy's head, because it's all meant to be out in the open anyways. Regardless, these weren't like "yay it's Crocodile! :)" moments for Luffy is what I mean)

But also Luffy was very grateful of Law for saving his life and was willing to put his trust into Law for their alliance- of course, they weren't explicitly enemies to begin with, rivals at most, but still. Luffy respects those who help him.

But also Luffy grew during the timeskip. Like he's not that clueless anymore (like he finally understands Hancock is in love with him etc), and similarly Luffy gets that Buggy is an absolute loser now. But also Buggy did also help save Luffy's life (even if it was by accident), and while IDK if Luffy is aware of that, I don't think that helped improve Luffy's impression of Buggy

So like. The fuck does Luffy think of Crocodile, at this moment? Even with the Cross Guild reveal, he didn't even really comment on Croc and just focused his energy on being confused about Buggy being "the leader" of CG. IDK it feels almost intentional or something, that we don't know what Luffy thinks?? Especially since we did get Zoro's opinion on Mihawk in the situation?? Or am I delulu?? (Sidenote. I'd love to know what Robin would have to say about Crocodile helping save Luffy's life. What Jinbei might think of the final words Crocodile left him with before blasting them out of Akainu's reach. But mainly just Robin's thoughts)

Like IDK my best guess would be that Luffy still hates Crocodile just the same but is like grossed out by technically owing him one??? In the classic

-kinda way, you know? And that he'd be just kinda confused about it?

Because I can't fucking imagine Luffy being like "oh we're cool now" with Crocodile, let alone "Yay Crocodile :) He saved my life!". But also like. Luffy does kind of owe Croc one. Kind of. And Luffy is usually very respectful of that kind of thing. Aaaaaaaa???

(Also does. Does Luffy even know it was Crocodile who yeeted him and Jinbei out of Akainu's reach to begin with. 'Cause he was unconcious. Knocked the fuck out. Does. Does Luffy even know. Did anybody tell him???)

I just.

There's the reasonable part of me that knows Crocodile is an irredeemable evil dickbag and everything he has ever said and done up to the most recent chapters support that. He is too far gone.

And then there's the absolutely delulu part that loves a tragic villian who gets a heartwrenching redemption that's looking for any fucking sign that could indicate Crocodile could maybe be one

#Moon posting #OP Meta #OP Spoilers #Sir Crocodile #Crocodad #Haunted by thoughts of one (1) evil middle aged man #IDK I was rereading Punk Hazard today while on the train and just. God there's like no difference between Alabasta Croc and Ceasar #I mean there is but no there isn't. Dude was doing essentially the same shit just this time with much more child abuse #And we all agree that Ceasar is scum of the earth and irredeemable. #But also he was doing everything PURELY out of self-interest without ANY sad backstory to counter balance it #I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO THINK ANYMORE MAN I AM LOSING MY MARBLES #Kuma Flashback I Love You but I need to know what the fuck is happening with Crocodile so bad pleeeaaase #There's also like that note about Kuma saying he'd be wiling to make a deal with the devil just to protect his daughter #And If Crocodad Real. What a greater evolution of that but being wiling to BECOME the devil himself to protect your child #Also sorry about the Buggy slander but also not sorry. All that man is good for is being a punching bag for comedy as far as I'm concerned #He's very funny I'll give you that. And I'm looking forward to him and Shanks getting married

[martlet-my-beloved]

ran out of comic ideas so *gestures* take a doodle dump instead

First - Previous - Next - Masterpost

#oh my god tagging stuff for this au is a nightmare #undertale bluebird #martlet #undertale yellow #martlet undertale yellow #martlet uty #undertale au #frisk dreemurr #toriel dreemurr #chara dreemurr #chara: *points at martlet* excuse me who the fuck is this #i wanna escalate the story a bit further but i feel like the goofy vibes are gonna be ruined for a bit after i finally post that comic :/ #so i wanna like throw out a few more goofy ones before shit gets real for a bit #cause like a lotta jokes i wanna pull can only happen AFTER i set the scene #and unfortunately setting the scene requires a bit of seriousness(TM) #anyways im very much a momlet fan but only if shes extremely confused and very much Not Ready to be a mom #like girl is a what 21 year old who wanted to be a guard so she could slack off HER ASS AINT MOM MATERIAL #but like its really fucking funny so she gets to be a mom. for my entertainment #born to be fun older cousin forced to be a mother 😔

[grahamcore]

if you’ve read a metric ton of fanfiction and had your memory of canon retroactively altered you may be entitled to financial compensation

#but fr this experience is so funny to me and it happens constantly #i once had a real convo with a friend about hannibal burning down will’s house and how i was shocked that it didn’t get brought up more #yeah that shit just straight up did not happen. i read it in a fic. #but i had been going on for i don’t know how long thinking that will’s house had burned down at some point?? i felt brainwashed #sometimes it’s helpful though. it’s nice to be able to read fix it fics and then intentionally live a lie #what do you mean hannibal and will aren’t miraculously living under the radar of the law in florence right now? yes they are. #i do this for daredevil too. season 3 ended so differently in my mind #and ESPECIALLY for the witcher because fuck that whole geralt never properly apologizing and treating jaskier like shit thing #hannibal #hannigram #daredevil #the witcher #dc

[wynnundead]

To everyone saying they didn't like the last chapter, do you know why suddenly adachitoka announced the ending when none of it felt complete at the time?

I mean i definitely dont know for sure, but its important to realize its likely the manga sales, they dropped off at some point so adachitoka had to wrap it up and not only that they have a many health issues cause hiatus over the years.

I know a majority of the fandom on tumblr reads fastmoons scans, i know i do and i know the economy is shit and lots of us cant even buy the volumes in support even so im not blaming anyone.

But you gotta cut the authors some slack here, they probably had so much left to tell and write and they probably wanted to explain the plotholes and fill in more info.

But because it was the end..they wanted to end it in a happy way and i believe thats just fine, i just finished reading it and im content with how it ended considering the circumstances.

Its okay to not like the ending i guess, but dont let the reason why be because of something the authors couldnt control.

#noragami #noragami manga #noragami spoilers #yato #hiyori iki #yukine #adachitoka #ch 109 #goodbye noragami #edit: fuck it #adachitoka was trying to end this the same way it started with shenanigans cause it must of made them feel better about something- #they created ending...who the fuck cares how yato was saved..its on brand with this manga for funny shit to happen #who fucking cares if extra time was spent on nora..she was literally looked down on by many people in the fandom early on #she deserved some extra love #its fucking annoying watching people shit on the last chapter #like its the last bit of noragami a series WE HAVE ALL LOVED over the years #and your treating it terribly???? #the authors did what they could with what they had and thry are real people who did theyre best #dont be fucking assholes

[dailykugisaki]

Day sixty-three | id in alt

A puppet and a witch.

#dailykugisaki #jjk #kugisaki nobara #mahito #jjk mahito #i Love havin to violently clarity who mahito is #ive never drawn this cursed bitch in ny life but making this thing do fucked up expressions is fun #update! ive been low-key concern looking at chapter 209-212 because...... #dawg i think the merging is already Happening #AM I DELUSIONAL? DAWG IT MAY BE ALREADY HAPPENINH #WHAT THE FUCK DID THOSE BEAMS OF LIGHT MEAN??? UHHH??? UH?? ERM idk tho #i might be staring at the wrong shit but yknow #another update! its just the plans furthering lmao #though... i do think the merging should be able to at least start or something... it would be interesting to see #i fucking giggling tho bc in chapter... 244? i think the old guy with the katana says they could use cursed evergy to protect themselves #they completely disregard the people of japan and its FUNNY #but yknow who ACTUALLY has non sorcerer friends and cares for them insanely so? Kugisaki and fucking todo idk why not #i just wanna see what happens i wanna see how fucked up this is gonna be #also can maki fucking uh heavenly restriction herself out of the merger or is she fucked #im asking the REAL questions on my fucking daily Kugisaki account because this is the only way i can pick apart jjk with any kind of group

[francy-sketches]

birthday (im 12 now)

#my art #legit feel like I just turned 20 yesterday tf happened #i was gonna draw a silly joke about my americansona being allowed to drink now but im going with existential dread :3 #dont worry i have a really funny one in mind for next year. if im still into asoiaf which lets be real. probably #shit ive been into these fuckass books for like 4 years that's embarrasing. anyway idc #technically im not 21 yet i think its in a few hours. still time to go to the us have 1 drink and get arrested

[lazylittledragon]

just watched the new season of black mirror and now i need to take a shower and burn my computer

#ramble #gUYS THIS ISN'T EVEN FUNNY ANYMORE #WE NEED TO STOP #AT FIRST IT WAS ALL SHIT THAT COULDN'T *REALLY* HAPPEN #THIS COULD BE REAL THIS COULD BE REAL THIS COULD BE REAL #THIS IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW #I'M INSANE

[dhmis-autism]

Red Guy being deluded with his crush on Duck is equally funny, me thinks

Just this feral full on rabies man Duck who commits war crimes and Red’s delusional ass goes “he is so dreamyyyyy ❤️❤️❤️”

HE'S GOT THEEE WORST TASTE AND I WILL STAND BY THAT FOREVER.

Like, Red has got his issues, but you could see why people would like him. Sooo many people have/had a crush at him at one point it's unreal. NO ONE FEELS THAT WAY ABOUT DUCK GDGDF

THERE'S SO MUCH WRONG WITH HIM... FOR GODS SAKE LOOK AT HIM.

look at his PANTS LEG

#THAT'S HIS MAN. THATS WHAT HE'S GONNA SETTLE FOR #worst taste in clothes and WORSE taste in men #anyways. i got this way back when i was talking about their dynamic in my head ect ect #so JUST FOR YOU ANON i will go into this bc u've waited LONG ENOUGH #i think hes totally delusional in that /i/ think he definitely thinks duck is much cuter than he actually is #strikes me as a 'builds shit up in his head' type. like ive said before i think. that he would think real hard about saying smth. #like TO duck abt it. and then would NOT for months and months and months #GOD I SAW SOMEONE SAY ON THE POST WHERE I SAID I THINK DUCK THINKS THEYRE MARRIED... #...that like in reality all that happened was duck dropped something on the ground and red knelt down to get it and give it to him #and in his head that was FULLY a proposal and he was like wow. didnt think this was how id get engaged but ok. #and when it does come up reds like WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ??? and duck has like. a photo of their wedding (for tha BIT) #and he's like 'youve missed our anniversary five years in a row btw :/' #AND THAT WAS THE FUNNIEST FUCKING TAGS ANYONES EVER LEFT ON ANY OF MY DRAWINGS #I HAVE IT SCREENCAPPED I THINK ABOUT DRAWING IT ALL THE TIME ITS SOFUCKING FUNNY #anyways love u anon stay cool have a nice summr #my dhmis postings

[moongothic]

Many people have pointed out (in relation to Crocodad) how in Japanese the etymology of the word "wani" (crocodile) is a bit complicated to say the least and in mythology could mean a variety of things, including a shark, sea monster or a dragon

Which, of course, is quite an interesting coincidence. Crocodile does often get referred to as "wani" not just by Luffy but some other characters, and so it would be just a little funny if both of Luffy's dads were sorta kinda called dragons

There's also people pointing out how Zoro's mother was called "Tera", similar to terra (earth) and Sanji's mother was named Sora (sky). So if Luffy's birthing parent was named after a water-dwelling creature, well, it'd be cute and round out the monster trio's birthing parents in a funny way, since we'd have earth, sky and the sea

But what really is fucking me up about the whole wani-thing is the Myth of Toyotama-hime

So the TL:DR; of the myth is

The pregnant princess Toyotama came from the Ryuuguu Castle deep in the oceans onto land to give birth to her child, telling her husband that when she would give birth, she would revert back into her true form, requesting him to not look at her while she gave birth. But her husband could not keep that promise, so he peeked in on his wife, only to witness a giant wani giving birth. The sight of this horrified the husband so much he fled, while Toyotama princess was so hurt by what had happened that she returned to the sea, abandoning her child.

Indeed, this myth bringing up wani pregnancy is just. An interesting coincidence for Crocodad speculation

Of course, we know Oda borrows from mythology (fucking, Fishman Island's castle is literally the Ryuuguu Castle), so if Crocodad Real, it's genuinely plausible Oda could('ve) take(n) inspiration from that very myth

Thing about it is that though...

Like, if we're assuming Crocodile never fully realized he was trans until he got pregnant, then him transitioning either immidiately or as soon as he could after giving birth would make sense. Dude seeks out Iva-chan and gets the t-juice*, so on and so forth, but my question is like, would that have been before or after delivering the baby to Dragon (so he could then pass it onto Garp)

*(Or hell, maybe Iva-chan was there helping deliver the baby, helping Crocodile crack his own egg etc, maybe the secret Iva-chan is holding over Crocoboy's head isn't that they knew Crocodile is trans and could out them, but knowing Crocodile gave birth to god know whose child)

Because like

How did Dragon find out about his partner transitioning?

Did pre-T Crocodile tell him he was transitioning while handing over the baby? Or did he just leave without an explanation and allowed Dragon to just Take In The Change after it had happened whenever they saw each other again (if they ever did, for all we know he could've just walked away without talking to Dragon again and Dragon just found out either from Iva-chan directly or from seeing him on the news)

Or did Crocodile transition first and then deliver the baby to Dragon without any warning, again, just giving Dragon one hell pf a surprise

In any scenario, how did that even go down?

And we have to ask the sad question of... is Dragon a Bisexual King or not? And would Crocodile have been... afraid of Dragon's reaction? (This would've been a younger Crocodile mind you, who would literally have been just coming out of his shell, and that shit's scary man)

Because if Toyotama Princess is any indicator, this wani's relationship did not end well after her truth was revealed

Like, let's say Crocodile transitioned first and then showed up without warning as a man to Dragon to hand over the baby. Thing is, while we know VERY LITTLE about Dragon still, I can't imagine him being like violently transphobic or even lashing out at his partner when he'd come out. But I could imagine him being so shocked he'd be left utterly speechless.

And I'm not entirely sure which would be worse; Dragon outright but "kindly" telling Crocodile he's not into men and breaking the poor bastard's heart, or Bi!Dragon being too shocked to say anything, letting Crocodile to just jump to conclusions based on his reaction (and maybe then causing Dragon to jump into further conclusions (that Crocodile must actually be into women)), unintentionally causing a divorce out of sheer misunderstanding and literal lack of communication

And the sad part is, considdering Dragon is a very secretive man, who according to the Crocodad Theory can't even have told his partner his full name mind you... The miscommunication seems very plausible to me?? Does it not?

Or, maybe Crocodile delivered the baby to Dragon pre-T and told him he's going to Iva-chan without further explanation, jumping into conclusions, afraid to hear what Dragon would say. So he just leaves without explaining before Dragon gets to say a word. And Dragon just accepts it. Assuming he's the one getting dumped.

Either way, whatever might've happened can't have been good, can it

Also, considdering Garp is a fucking idiot (affectionate), and Luffy clearly inherited The Stupid from his grandfather, I would not be surprised if Dragon was also actually a bit of a himbo underneath that serious face he puts on (either that or Crocodile kept on smoking while pregnant)

Which could also turn what would otherwise be a tragic miscommunication into an absolute comedy if Crocodile and Dragon ever met again and the two realized that they're both idiots who jumped into conclusions and ruined their marriage by refusing to talk about their fucking feelings to each other. This is an absolute trainwreck of a family

But considdering the things Crocodile has done by this point*, would it ever even be possible for the two to reconcile?? Because, althought Dragon is pro-overthrowing corrupt governments especially if they're affiliated with the World Government, from what I can tell, he's still against unnececary violence (Vegapunk even comments that Dragon "hates war" in a flashback) and needless loss of life. And Crocodile caused just that.

*And I don't even mean the failed attempt at taking over Alabasta, I mean the drought Crocodile caused that caused countless people to starve to death and then caused the civil war which had already taken lives and permanently disabled people BEFORE the Strawhats ever even get to Alabasta. Like Crocodile's bomb may have been a dud but he still caused people to die for no reason, and I can't imagine Dragon being fine with that. But then again, Robin and other Baroque Works members also contributed to the loss of life and their sins have been neatly swept under the rug so IDK

And like. We don't know if Crocodile moonlighted as a Revolutionary for like 10+ years after Luffy was born and slowly went out of contact or if he just left immidiately. But theoretically, the two might not have even seen each other in like almost 20 years

That'd be a long time to carry a broken heart

How the fuck would you even heal from that

Also like

Crocodile did seem a little suicidal at Impel Down if I'm being honest

Like.

He had a dream of becoming Pirate King. But he lost to Whitebeard, and his dreams were ruined.

Dude had a master plan to take over a country that took him almost a decade to pull off, only for it to get wrecked in the final hour by a literal child.

His useless underlings then come and try to break him out of prison

And he chooses to stay

When we finally see his face for the first time in Impel Down... His mouth might be forming a smile, but those eyes aren't

And he even says it himself

"I didn't think there'd be anything for me to do if I were free"

Is it not like he has given up on life entirely..?

And sure, he does ask to be let out so he can get revenge on Whitebeard, but was it out of a genuine belief he could actually take down the old man or just a slightly more fun way to die than rotting away in prison for the next few decades?

You know the saying, "to be loved is to be changed"

Frankly, the same goes for the reverse. Being unloved, or believing yourself to be unloveable will change you. For the worse

#OP Meta #Crocodad #Sir Crocodile #I know I keep on saying I don't believe in Crocodad anymore and here I am back on my bullshit again #This asshole is the only thing keeping me from falling apart rn just please let me have this #I'm just so fucking intriqued by the storytelling potential here #Of what the fuck happened #If it's real #The tragedy could be absolutely devastating #Or you could have an insane One Piece slapstick reunion #I am extremely fond of the idea of The Disaster Family mind you #Because they could be so fucking funny (especially if you included Garp) (Holy shit can you fucking IMAGINE) #Like yes emotional reunion between Crocodile and Luffy yes sure #But please considder #Luffy somehow finding out and then demanding for an explanation from An Extremely Reluctant Crocodile #Who can't really do much because he doesn't have it in him to hurt his baby boy but also The Baby Boy is an unstoppable MENACE #The slapstick would be hysterical #Also I am pro-Bullying Crocodile #Moon posting #On a slightly less downer of a note to end on #While Crocodile might've given up on life before Marineford he certainly found a reason to live during/after Marineford #This was supposed to be a short post how did it turn into borderline fanfic

[the-magpie-archives]

Okay so this October just gone I went to a panel at comicon that Jonathan Sims was speaking at, and it was great! I'm obviously a fan of his work and some other great writers were on it too, so I really enjoyed it. During this panel, Jonathan said something along the lines of 'A really unnerving piece of cover art can go a long way to prime your audience'. So I thought "huh yeah that makes sense!" yknow, however the phrase goes, we all do judge a book by it's cover to some extent and it definitely helps to be in the right mood for what you're about to read. But I don't think I really fully understood until just now exactly how right he was.

I'm a uni student so obviously I'm pretty broke, but I'd been wanting to read Thirteen Storeys for ages, so you can imagine my excitement when I found a second hand copy for £1.50! It wasn't in the great condition, but it was good enough, and I'd take any hardcover for that price!

The arrival of the book happened to coincide with my sleep schedule being even more messed up than usual, but this was kinda welcome in context! I love horror, but I read a lot of it so I'm a little desensitised; this combined with doing ghost hunting for fun means that horror media is the best for me when I'm sleep deprived and on edge.

As expected from the first couple chapters the writing was excellent and the story delightfully engaging, but to my pleasant surprise it was really quite creepy! And made all the more enjoyable by how relatable it is. For some reason though, chapter three really got under my skin. Stuff with kids freaks me out in general, that creeping sense of dread as the story builds up to its climax, and an odd memory from (much hated) church as a child all built together to make it stick in my mind for the entire day, and following night.

I mostly read late at night so when I picked the book up again to carry on, I was still thinking about chapter three, still freaked out, and still sleep deprived as hell. I kept thinking about the woman I bought the book from, I'm not sure why. I guess I was thinking about kids and wondering if she had any that would've messed with the book to get it into that condition, but whatever. I kept reading, enjoying it just as much, if not more for the lingering taste of chapter three.

By the time I put the book down it was around 3am, and i was pleasantly spooked enough to go to sleep. I don't know why but I stopped for a moment to look at the cover, partially examining the marks and scratches, partially admiring the design.

That's when I saw 'PENNY' written messily on the back and when I tell you my heart DROPPED. I don't know what I thought! But my 3am mind was racing, scared as FUCK. Had this random woman's kid read the book? Had they just decided to scribble out the first name they read when they opened it? Why that one!?!? Why could it not be LITERALLY ANY OTHER NAME???

And that is when I realised that it is PART OF THE FUCKING COVER ART. Well played Sims, well fucking played. In one simple design detail I was forced through the entire emotional journey of the story again in SECONDS. I could've dropped dead. (though to be honest, someone found dead clutching a copy of the book would probably be good publicity considering).

So yeah, moral of the story? Good cover art can do ALL MANNERS OF THINGS to your audience. For my sake, use it wisely.

#Jonathan Sims deserves to know that the cover art of his book scared me in that moment more than I've been scared by real actual ghosts #Kudos to whoever thought of that because holy fucking shit #It genuinely had me terrified and nothing does that these days #It's also worth noting that I wrote this post like‚ just after it'd happened‚ hence the aggression 💀 #I forgot about it for a few months but I think it's funny so it's coming out of the drafts #thirteen storeys #Jonathan Sims #Jonny sims #horror books #horror writing

[padfootastic]

One of my favorite semi-crack headcanons is that Narcissa actually does look like her relatives, she’s got naturally black hair and gray eyes, but she initially started wearing glamor charms/charms to change the color after the war to avoid the number of people giving her suspicious looks for her resemblance to two notorious Death Eaters and her husband who’d only avoided a conviction through Ministry ineptitude and legit everyone suspects him of lying or also lied but knows the truth, but then she just fell into habit of doing this (and uses relatively permanent charms. They can be undone, but they don’t need to be constantly reapplied). Bella escapes from prison and says “what the hell happened to your hair—and your eyes” straight away, first thing she says to her sister after over a decade; Narcissa shrugs and says looking like her convicted criminal cousin and sister wasn’t winning her any favors, better swing the opposite direction to see if that helps. Andromeda, who looks like Bella’s twin, still got suspicious looks but marrying a Muggleborn and having his kid went a long ways toward making people trust her; she has a scathing commentary on her sister deadass changing her appearance to try to dodge the DE allegations and it is one of the first things she says to Sirius after meeting him again. Draco genuinely cannot recognize younger photos of his mother and fully thinks this is her natural appearance; he gets a nasty shock when he learns otherwise and he only discovers the truth because Rabastan was telling his sort of nephew stories of what they all used to be like and found a photo album that had their old pictures. Rabastan watches the kid stare at 16 year old Narcissa Black with her little cousins at her side—all three looking near identical and laughing together—and wonders if he broke the kid and if so, can he fool Narcissa into thinking he didn’t play a role in this; he sadly decides he can’t and frantically tries to calm Draco down, because if Narcissa doesn’t hex him into next year, she’ll just tell Bella and Bella most certainly will. Sirius once saw a recent photo of Cissy and choked on his breakfast, pre-seeing Andy again, asking who the hell that woman was because it sure isn’t his cousin. Upon the younger lot confirming that’s just how she looks now, he hollers for Tonks to go get her mother, Sirius needs to find out what the hell her sister is up to. This is the first time the younger kids meet Andromeda and she makes a hell of an impression

ok but why is this actually hilarious lmao

i think i’ve seen something adjacent to this in a fic where someone (sirius?) makes a crack ab narcissa partially dying her hair blond a la the movies to try and fit in better w the maggots and the thought is honestly too funny.

some teenage girls get a tattoo of their bfs, some teenage boys carve their crush’ names into their hands, and narcissa black permanently colors her hair blond and staunchly stands by that decision well into her adult years (while resolutely cursing her fair skin for betraying her embarrassed flush)

#narcissa malformed #bro that was supposed to be malfoy duh but typo changed it and this is funnier????? #also. the carving name thing is real and happened to a friend of mine #funniest thing? mf spelled her name wrong 😭😭 #people r wild #especially those who think they’re in love #i fully believe narcissa was the kind of teenage girl who made lucius her entire personality #bc like. i imagine them to have an age gap. and a teen girl w an older dude?????? bruh. the way they internalise that shit #unreal #sad irl but v v funny in fiction #pen’s asks

[maythearo]

Flashing news, last night I had the misfortune to stumble into a conversation with some AI incels whose morals were, and I quote "better steal art from dead people than living ones. Who's gonna complain? They're dead anyway lmao 🤣🤣" so to that I responded "what if I disrespected your mom's grave when she dies lmao" and they went "I can't fucking believe you joke about such thing, that's so disrespectful"

#i'm convinced they have amnesia since they don't remember the arguments they had from 2 minutes prior in the conversation #mfs spam the groupchat with disrespectful jokes but when I make a disrespectful joke about them they get mad 🥺 #don't joke about shit you wouldn't be able to take it if it were to happen to you fr #dude skipped the 2 grade class that talked about empathy #shut up may #i for real had a lot of fun cause every 2 messages they contradict themselves and when I point it out they ignore it #and mask their fragile egos with american psycho and the joker memes so they (in their heads) will appear less pathetic and vulnerable #little do they know american psycho and the joker memes stopped being funny 153 years before christ