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jokeroutsubs · 27 days

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In a surprising twist for fans of the Slovenian Shagadelic rock and roll band Joker Out, frontman Bojan Cvjetićanin has recently confirmed his decision to relocate to Finland, followed quickly by the announcement that guitarist Kris Guštin will be leaving the band to join Dutch girl group K3. Along with the recent news of drummer Jure Maček’s critical drumstick shortage, fans of Joker Out appear to be facing a crisis that not even ‘Sama’ released on Spotify could solve.

Amidst the whirlwind of changes, two steadfast members, Jan Peteh and Nace Jordan, were spotted returning from their recent European tour to their rehearsal space. However, fans quickly noticed the absence of their bandmates, prompting speculation about the band's future.

But now, in an exclusive revelation, we can unveil the heartwarming reason behind Jan and Nace's solo return: they adopted a kitten together, and took some much needed alone time to settle in their new addition. After the emotional rollercoaster of bidding farewell to their departing bandmates, Jan and Nace found solace in the company of their newfound furry companion.

Sources close to the band suggest that the kitten has been named ‘Jos’. While some speculate that this is an ode to Dutch member, Kris Guštin, it is far more likely that this decision was made to honour fan group, JokerOutSubs, and thank them for their tireless work in translating Joker Out content. Nace, the only member of Joker Out to follow JokerOutSubs on Instagram, is known to be an huge fan.

The rockstars now face the onerous task of introducing Jos to their existing menagerie. Jan’s cat Igor, known for his sassy demeanour and rockstar attitude, is said to be unsure about the new addition. When confronted about his new sibling, Igor remained tight lipped and mysterious, much like his father, Jan. On the other hand, Nace’s dog, Ollie, has been wildly enthusiastic, and provided a comment to our reporters: ‘woof woof, bark bark!’*

While the band undergoes a period of transition, fans can take comfort in the knowledge that the bond between Jan, Nace, Igor, Ollie, and their newest band member will only continue to grow stronger. In the ever-changing landscape of rock and roll, Joker Out proves that amidst departures and new beginnings, the power of music and friendship endures.

*Note from JokerOutSubs: in a rare moment of failure on our part, we were unable to translate this sentence. If anyone speaks dog (the Slovene dialect version) and would enjoy joining our team, send your credentials to [email protected].

-~-~-~-~-~

Original article by Delo can be found here.

Article translation by a JokerOutSubs member. Proof read by IG GBoleyn123.

#joker out #jan peteh #nace jordan #bojan cvjetićanin #kris guštin #jure maček #jokeroutsubs #how sweet of nace to suggest Jos as their kitten's name 🥺#truly our biggest fan <3

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da-proti-toku-grem · 2 months

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Hey! I just posted a fic, so I'm giving you guys the link + an aesthetic I made in case you want to read it :3

darling you're my work of art

Since they moved in together a year ago now, Nace has gotten used to mornings when he wakes up before Jan and can lie in bed for a while watching his beautiful boyfriend look so peaceful in his sleep (the time he actually spends on this is between him, Igor and Ollie, there's no need for Jan to know – although he's been caught staring more than once). OR Nace and Jan going on a road trip together.

Title from Work of Art by Benson Boone

Special thank you to @fifi-goes-to-hollywood because I got this idea after our conversation about jance going on a road trip together back in December. It took me really long to write it because I had so many things to do and honestly I feel like I didn't focus as much in the road trip per se in the end but I hope you'll like it either way <3

#*tries not to cringe* hope you like it 🥹#joker out #jan peteh #nace jordan #jance #mine #my fics #maca writes #joker out moodboards

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sparkles-oflight · 2 months

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Tea Spilling

Long time no see Jance fanfic readers...

Tonight I bring you: Nace needs comfort and so does Jan [pre-relationship]

It takes place post Eurovision

Synopsis: "Love is a fire that burns unseen, a wound that aches yet isn’t felt, an always discontent contentment, a pain that rages without hurting" - Luís Vaz de Camões

Jan didn't like the strange feeling he had when he first met Nace... but now he wants to be next to him all the time. This time, Nace needs someone to talk to and Jan is the one who will be there for him.

Disclaimer: Please think of these as characters and not the actual people. I don’t encourage anyone to send this to any of the actual JO members nor do I encourage people to force any type of relationship between anyone.

“Whoaw, you really like to stare, uh?”, that’s what Nace told Jan when they first met.

Jan decided he wasn’t going to let the weird feeling he had that day win - the day Nace entered the studio next to Martin. He decided he wouldn’t let Nace be “Martin’s replacement”. Martin was who he wanted and Nace wasn’t going to take that away from him...

And yet, here he is entering Nace’s apartment, taking his shoes off, and greeting Nace’s dog. Here he is to help Nace when he needs it.

Nace told Jan he needed someone to talk to and usually that’s Kris’ job but he’s sick and Jan wasn’t going to leave him alone, nor did he want to. Jan tried to fight a lot against what he felt when he met Nace for months, but now he himself felt safe near Nace. He felt like a little schoolgirl being all over her crush but never taking the initiative...

- You can sit if you want. – Nace told him – Want some tea?

- Sure.

Jan sat on the sofa and rubbed Ollie’s belly to find some comfort in him...

Nace returned with two teacups and set them on the coffee table. Ollie turned his attention to Nace who received him with arms wide open and kissed him on the neck before sitting down next to Jan and rubbing Ollie’s belly himself.

- Thanks for coming today.

- Oh, it’s nothing.

Jan looked around. It’s not like it’s his first time here, but it’s his first time alone so he gets to observe the room: there are plants on some of the bookshelves, there are pictures of Nace’s family, some Fan art printed, and books of various things but most about music and animals. There’s a box overflowing with bracelets made by the fans, but no pictures of Nace, except for one – a picture of him and his girlfriend.

- So... what did you want to talk about? – Jan broke the silence after having bitten almost all the polish off his fingernails.

- I... – Nace cleared his throat – me and Nika broke up.

Jan looked at him and waited for Nace to say something.

- I’m sorry for just throwing this info onto you suddenly. I just didn’t want to make rodeos. – he adverted his gaze to Ollie.

- Do you... want to talk about it?

- She broke up with me because she said she didn’t want to be far away from me all the time and she needed someone to always be by her side.

Jan nodded and kept listening.

- I understand that, but I really love her, Jan. – Nace looked back at him – I need her too. I need her to be next to me and if it were for me, she would!

Jan noticed Nace’s eyes tears forming in his eyes, and he felt as if his heart had sunk to the floor. He had never seen him like that – he had never seen Nace sad.

Sure, Jan had seen Nace cry over frustration with something at the studio or of joy when he was with them, but he had never seen Nace heartbroken which made him want to cry with him.

- But I know she can’t... and she never will now. – he started crying and hugged Ollie.

Jan didn’t know whether to hug Nace or let him be. He’s clearly putting some distance between them, but yet again why would he call Jan if he didn’t want support? Jan wasn’t sure what to do...

He put his hand on his chest and took a deep breath before taking Nace’s hands and softly squeezing them.

Their eyes met and neither said a word. Instead, Jan started breathing slowly and Nace followed his breath’s rhythm even though he could feel Jan was shaking and his skin was chilly.

- Thank you. – Nace muttered removing his glasses and cleaning his eyes with his hand.

- You’re welcome. I know it’s not easy... Me and my last girlfriend broke up over something similar too... – he cleared his throat – It is hard to love in a band.

- Yeah, I know. – he put his glasses back on and grabbed Jan’s hands again – It’s just too much pressure. There’s a whole world looking at us and we have to put that world as our priority if we want to make it and it’s just... Not fair for the others around us.

- Do you regret joining us?

- Nah. You guys are like my family. – Nace smiled and circled Jan’s hand with his thumb.

Jan was surprised by that statement, so he decided to drink a bit of his tea.

- Let me just-

Jan picked up the cup and immediately had to let it go due to its heat. The tea fell on the mat and in his shoes and a bit on his jeans.

- SHIT! IT’S BURNING!

- I’m so sorry! – Nace ran to the kitchen.

When he returned, he gave Jan a wet cloth to put in his fingers and brought him some napkins to clean himself. Nace noticed Jan’s fingers had open wounds from playing the guitar earlier today...

- I’m sorry, Jan. I should have warned you. I’m so stupid.

But Jan didn’t reply.

- I could wash your shoes... The napkins can’t do much.

Jan didn’t reply again.

- Hey, Jan? – Nace touched his shoulder – Are you okay?

- I’m just so tired! – Jan lashed out but then he started shaking again – I’m so tired, Nace...

Nace sat next to Jan again and laid his head against his, looking straight into the guitarist's eyes.

Jan could feel the older one’s breath against his, nose on nose, hand on hand. He could feel his heart skipping beats while he admired those big brown eyes. It felt as if both were on stage, and they were safe from the cruelty outside of the concert’s venue.

- A sem ti povedal kdaj, kako lepo dišiš mi…? - “Have I ever told you how good you smell?” Jan quoted.

Nace smiled.

- Do you forgive me?

- I wasn’t even mad at you... I just... sometimes I lash out at people. I’m sorry you saw that.

- Hey, if you need someone to lash out at, I’m here.

- No, Nace. – he massaged his forehead – You don’t deserve it. I need to work through this on my own.

- And I can help you with that... – Nace hugged him – I’m going to get you some band-aids. Do you want to spend the night here? I can spare you some of my clothes.

- Thank you... But I really don’t need it.

- I do. – Nace broke apart from their embrace – Could you please stay tonight?

Jan couldn’t figure out whether Nace really needed him or if he just wanted to keep an eye on him but even so...

- Okay, you win, Mister Jordan. – Jan smiled.

♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩♫♩

Afternote: I actually re-used some bits and pieces of a fanfic I deleted for this one...

I don't write more Jance only because I find them harder to write than BoKris? With BoKris, I basically have "the whole little porridge made for me", as we say in Portuguese (I have all the work done for me), thanks to their history.

Jance is different. Jance is more mature, (I swear I've been holding back going on a rant about Jan for so long) and I think I don't know how that feels like?

I mean, I also don't know how BoKris feels like, but there's more info to work with and they give me "high school crush" vibes all over the place and I can write that reality more easily thanks to that.

Jance... Jance is special. I love it. And because I love it, I don't want it to be fake.

MASTER POST | Recommended next: Por Qué

#joker out #joker out jan #joker out nace #jan peteh #nace jordan #jance #joker out fanfic #fanfic #writing

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lovvecherrymotion · 21 days

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Asks, you said? Lets go!

1. How do you imagine their wedding? Small and intimate or a bit bigger (approx. 100 guests)?

2. Show me the aesthetic of their wedding! Colors, their suits, wedding rings

3. Who’s gonna be their groomsmen?

4. Who from ESC 23 will be invited and who will eventually arrive?

5. How would JOcrew help with their wedding?

6. Any funny accident?

7. Where would they go on honeymoon?

(finally replying omg)

1. they aren't on the same page at first, but settle for a smaller wedding and a nicer venue. honestly, nace would do anything for jan, so if he'd rather have a small wedding, he'll be more than willing to compromise. jan does end up going with the venue nace liked the most 💜

2. i'll be putting the wedding moodboard under the cut because this will probably get long 😅

3. officially, jan's brother and kris are the wedding witnesses, but all of joker out are their groomsmen, because they could never pick between all of them.

4. surprising everyone - jere makes it! he knows where slovenia is! häärijä is also invited ofc and comes along. other guests from the 2023 class: teya and salena, gustaph (because of you is a jance song after all 🤭 and he gifts them a lovely live performance during their reception), alika, wild youth, mia, alessandra, luke, blanca paloma & mae - and they all make it!

5. the jo crew does NOT work during their wedding day. they want their friends to enjoy themselves and that includes not helping during the wedding. they do take mark and vita's suggestions of wedding photographers tho

6. it's a special day so of course not everything goes smoothly. jan is very late because he had to go back to get his shoes and at some point he's wearing bojan's socks and kris' tie because he can't keep going back home to get everything. nace is mildly annoyed because the flowers are not the ones they ordered but jan says he likes them better so he gets over it pretty quickly. the biggest accident is bojan crying after drinking way too much and just holding them and telling both of them how much he loves them - it's loud and everyone laughs but both jan and nace feel very loved.

7. tokyo, japan! i think jan would be okay with going anywhere but he knows how much nace wants to go there, so he's the one to make the suggestion - and when nace's eyes light up, he knows he's made the right choice. he buys nace all the gengar merch he can find 🥺

here's the jance wedding moodboard i made months ago. i'm claiming jan as a fellow space nerd so it's a little space themed (couldn't find a puppy that looked like ollie but... i had to include the pets ofc)

#oof this did get long #i hope you enjoy it 💕#jance #janace #ask

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me-sploh-rada-imas · 5 months

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i love when nace posts about ollie

#joker out #nace jordan #ollie #tall man and tiny dog combo is so funny and cute to me #he's taking the when more igor sign to heart and knows we want more ollie too

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radioactive-cloud · 6 months

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you know what? nace intended to send the video of him and ollie to jan and accidentally shared it to his story instead and just rolled with it.

#i should probably stop assuming things huh #it's literally all we do in this fandom tho don't we #anyways it's true because i said so☝️🤓#nace jordan #jan peteh #jance #janace #ollie the dog #joker out

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jokrrouttfynn · 7 months

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I will never get over the fact that Jan most probably spent Christmas with Nace last year

and since I don’t was to keep y’all on the edge, explanation under the cut

So, there is this story from Jan’s highlights (please go watch all of them, there is some gold Igor content)

I sent this to a friend of mine (shoutout to @/jokeringout on ig) asking her if it was Ollie (Nace’s dog)

We both agreed it, most likely, is in fact Ollie

Now, I know y’all don’t speak Italian, so trust me on this (or just google translate idk) BUT on the date thingy, next to the ‘22, it says ‘24 dicembre 2022’ which is the date for December 24th 2022.

those two men literally spent Christmas together, I want to cry

#I don’t know if the other band members were there too #none of them have highlights and there is no reference on Christmas 2022 on the band account #But it’s safe to say it was only them two and I am seriously sobbing #joker out #jan peteh #nace jordan #jance #janace

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hotcat37 · 22 days

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Dads and their sad little ouppy :3

#joker out #jance #nace jordan #jan peteh #Tomodachi posting #me my wife and our floor bound child #ollie the dog

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thegengarprincess · 8 days

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“Dobro jutro,ljubi.” “Dobro jutro,sonček.”

————————————————————————————————

Gene: Pure tooth-rotting *FLUFF*

Summery: Just a glimpse of what a normal lazy morning looks like 4 the husbands ever,except it’s their half-year anniversary N after some reminiscing,Jan decides 2 ask his now boyfriend of half a year if he still remembers the morning after they became official,and boy does Nace remember~

Disclaimer: *All* of this is completely fictional and im not associating this with the real people whatsoever,I just like using these silly lil pretty Balkan men as my Barbie dolls,the moment either of them say their uncomfortable with fanfic im deleting the whole thing,k.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*🐈‍⬛🐕*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* This was it.By now it had been almost a whole year since Martin brought *him* to meet the boys,the man who would replace one of his best friends all so they could keep making music.Jan knew why he had to leave yet it still stung to say goodbye when Martin had been through basically *everything* with the band till now.But what Jan didn’t know back then,no matter how much he believed logic would *always* triumph over love,was that “the new Martin” would end up proving only *sometimes* logic can triumph over love,*especially* when it comes to his now boyfriend and bassist,*Nace Jordan.* Which is how he found himself here,snuggled up in Nace’s bed with an arm wrapped securely yet ever so gently around his slightly smaller frame,Ollie curled up near his legs and snoring just as loudly as a *certain* brunette who had a tendency of reminding him of the small creature sometimes.He slowly awoke to the sound of a familiar yawn which could only come from one person,the one who had been sleeping beside and stayed with him through every rough night for *months* now,and hopefully forever when he can finally afford to go ring shopping,only the best for *his* Nacko afterall and nothing less. Nace tossed onto his side so he could see that perpetually half asleep face he’d come to adore so *so* much,when said face asked him a question along the lines of: “Do you still remember the morning after we became..*this*?” Jan said to him,voice still raspy from sleep ,using his finger to point at himself than Nace. “You mean the morning after we fucked eachother’s brains out in some dingy club bathroom while the rest of the boys were shitfaced drunk N doing god knows what then you told me the first time we saw eachother you forget how to *breath*.” he chuckled which also elected a giggle out of Jan,a sound he would *love* to keep in a jar and listen to on repeat when he has a off day. “Forgetting how 2 breath wasn’t the first thing I did when we met,you know.” “Then what was?” “How to think after I saw ur tattoo sleeve up close for the first time during one of our first gigs together,you had *no* idea what that did to me back then.” slowly tracing along the ink that adorned his boyfriends arm,all away to his shoulder as he planted a kiss on one of the last ink covered patches on the others skin. “Buttt I do now,alot actually.” “How so?” Nace pulled him closer and whispered the answer into his ear,breath ghosting slightly over his lobe,making a small smile tug at his lips. “Cause of all the bite marks and hickeys I always find scattered on them the next morning~” it was Jan’s turn to laugh now when Nace started to place a trail of kisses down his ear.watching the tips go a dark shade of red which always looked good when he was the one wearing it. “Not like you can really blame me tho,tattoos are hot as fuck *especially* when they belong to my extremely sexy and beautiful boyfriend!” he cupped the boyfriends in questions face in his hands and just *admired* him till Nace spoke again. “And who’s that?” Nace questioned as if he didn’t know who he belonged to. “You.” were the only words that came out of Jan’s mouth before he kissed him,slow but it was one of the sweetest kisses he’d ever given,that’s only natural when ur man’s a literal *angel* with the softest lips known to man afterall. Tho it stared off as a innocent “good morning /wake up kiss” which *may* have led to a full on makeout session,both men stayed like that for awhile,only breaking the kiss so they could get some air in their lungs,gently pressing their foreheads together and staring into the others eyes for what could have been an eternity,not like either of them would mind of course. “Dubro jutro,ljubi.” “Dubro jutro,sonček.” And if Jan and Nace from half a year ago knew this is what that faithful day where Martin brought him into the studio to the boys would lead to,maybe getting a new bassist wasn’t the worst idea in the world afterall~ ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*💜❤️*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(BIG BIG TY 2 ONE OF MY FAVE MOOTS @da-proti-toku-grem 4 ANSWERING MY ASK EARLIER N GETTING MY MOTIVATION 2 WRITE BACK INTO GEAR N HELPING WITH LAST MIN NERVES B4 POSTING!! 🥹🫶🥹🫶🥹🫶🥹🫶🥹🫶 ur truly such.a.f4n.*SWEETHEART* N I hope one day I can be just as good of a writer as U are! I fr always start kicking my feet N twirling my hair when I see U in my inbox,seeing the lil notification with ur user *ALWAYS* makes my day better + U were one of the first blogs i started following N was a huge idol of mine back when I was a lurker!! X33 luv ya Maca ,4 aslong as we have the boys and 4ever <3333333333)

#first time writing a fic N how the *F4* do U guys do this 😭😭#just wanted 2 write smh fluffy 4 the husbands cuz they deserve 2 live a happy life were everything’s perfect N nothing hurts :3 #also cuz im *STARVING* 4 Jance flavoured fluff N if I have 2 write it myself then so be it! ☺️☺️#big juicy and Jan je bog #joker out #nace jordan #jan peteh #jance #fanfic #I lobe them sm it’s not even *fair* anymore :’33

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anxious-witch · 7 months

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NaceKris prompt since you like angst and hurt and comfort: Kris is losing his shit over being compared to his dad again and feeling like he's not good enough, and goes to Nace to vent (I can't wait to read this one this is also very much for my own pleasure)

Sorry this took so long, this drabble got entirely too long. I hope you like it!

That said before reading. I wasn't actively trying to write Kris as autistic, but I might have slipped up. The meltdown he has is definitely...indicatory of that so just heads up for that. In case it may trigger someone, maybe skip this one

Kris stared at the headline of a portal on his phone. He shouldn't click on it. He really, really shouldn't.

Is Gušti's son on a way to surpass his father's fame with his band?

It was a click-bait. Kris knew it was a click-bite. And he knew his day was already shitty so he though: Oh, why the fuck not at this point? He clicked on the article. The article went in depth about Miha Guštin's career, and compared it to Kris'. And in comparison, Kris did not look particularly great.

And then the article ended with saying that a more appropriate comparison would be perhaps between Gušti and Bojan.

Kris closed the article. He put his phone on the table, away from him, but the words haunted him. How could he ever compare?

His whole life he was always walking either in his father's shadow or Bojan's. And he felt like a wilted flower, tired of forever trying to get to the sun.

No. He didn't think that. Being in the center of attention could be even worse. He saw the toll it took on Bojan. How his father still couldn't go anywhere in public without being recognized or photographed.

He just felt so...useless. Plain, in comparison. Bojan used to joke when they were younger that every good main character needs a few interesting side characters. That's exacrly what Kris was. A side character.

There is also a question of if Gušti's son would have ended up on the musical scene at all without the influence of his father.

His breath came in short gasps. Kris closed his mouth and forced hinself to try and breathe through his nose. Breathe in for four seconds, gold for seven, exhale for eight. And again.

He grabbed his phone and dialed a number he wanted before he could think about it.

"Hi, Kris," Nace's deep voice greeted him from the other side.

"Can I come over?"

Nace paused, no doubt hearing his voice wavering. There was sizzling in the background and Kris realized that Nace was probably in the middle of making lunch.

He truly knew how to pick the time for a mental breakdown.

"Of course. But are you...okay? Do you want me to come to you?"

"No, no. It's fine. I'll...we can talk when I get there."

Kris could practically see Nace furrowing his brows. Worrying if Kris was truly well enough to walk to his place, like they didn't live ten minutes away from one another.

"It's fine, really. See you in a few."

He ended the call before Nace coukd say anything else. Even just hearing his voice calmed him down a bit.

The walk to Nace's apartment wasn't long, but to Kris' spiralling thoughts, it felt like ages. When he finally reached it and rang the doorbell, he felt overwhelming relief.

Loud barking came from the other side of the door. Kris heard Nace cursing as he tried to get around Ollie and unlock the door.

Kris did his best to put on a smile as the doors opened.

"Get in quickly, before he gets out," Nace said urgently.

Kris stepped through the door, shutting it behind him. Ollie immediately began jumping at him and demanding attention. He crouched down to pet him and let him lick his hands. He grit his teeth and counted to ten to not flinch from it.

"Right. Ollie, that's enough, let him breathe."

"It's okay. Really."

He was still crouching down, so he had to look up. Of course, that was the moment he noticed Nace was wearing a black tank top.

The bassist didn't wear sleeveless shirts often, but God we he did...fuck. Kris had to concentrate.

"I'm okay, I think. It was. I read an article I shouldn't have and I just..."

...wanted to see you. He swallowed. Thankfully, Nace seemed to understand. He offered Kris a hand to pull him up.

"Let's go to the living room first."

Saliva from Ollie licking his hands suddenly became very uncomfortable. Almost burning. And Nace was probably going to eat.

"I'll just go wash my hands first," Kris said, getting up without taking Nace's hand.

Ollie whined sadly at the lack of attention and Nace gave him a worried look right before Kris dashed to the bathroom.

He took a few deep breaths, avoiding looking at himself in the mirror. Then he thoroughly washed his hands with soap. He stopped when the skin started getting red. He didn't want Nace asking questions about that.

He found Nace setting up the table in the dinning room. He put down two plates. And on the left side, where Kris prefered to sit, there was a fork, a spoon and a knife he liked. His chest felt warm. He never explicitly told Nace this, but he noticed anyway.

"I wasn't sure if you ate already but I figured it won't hurt to put another plate for you."

"Thank you," Kris said quietly.

He sat down and only then did he dare to sneak a look at Nace, who sat at the opposite side of the table. Maybe it was the light. Or the fact that Kris felt shaky and Nace was always so solid and steady. Like Kris could lean on him and he would not crack under the weight Kris was carrying.

Whatever it was, it made tears suddenly run down his cheeks. Like the pressure caught up with him all at once and was now crushing his chest.

There was a sound of chair scrapping against the floor, and it seemed so loud at the moment Kris had to cover his ears. He was sobbing, he realized, almost distantly.

It felt like he was shifting in an out of his body. One moment he was so overwhelmed with all the sensations and in the other he felt completely numb. He knew he was crying but felt none of it.

Then the lights turned off and the radio that played in the background was silenced, too. All he could hear for the moment were his own sobs and heavy breathing.

"Kris?"

Nace's voice was soft and quiet. It didn't feel like someone scratching their nails over his ears. Kris slowly lowered his hands from his ears.

"Can I touch you?"

Kris considered it. He didn't think he could stand that yet, though. He shook his head.

"Okay. How about we go through the exercise we do with Bojan?"

Kris almost snapped that he wasn't having a panic attack. That this was different. That everything was just too much. But that would use up too much air. And Nace looked so worried. He nodded.

"Okay. Only focus on five things you can see, okay? You don't have to tell me which ones out loud, just count them."

He didn't have the strenght to roll his eyes. Instead, he counted. One, Nace. Two, red tablecoth with a horrendous Christmas pattern. Why did it have Christmas pattern? It was October.

"Don't get distracted," Nace gently reprimanded.

Right. Counting.

Three, the table. Four, the plate. Fifth...the fork.

He looked back at Nace and nodded once, indicating he was done.

"Alright. Four things you can touch?"

One, the hoodie he was wearing. Two, his jeans. Three, the chair he was sitting on. Four...

He reached out and carefully grasped Nace's shoulder. Well, a place between his shoulder and neck, so his hand was touching his shirt. It felt more bearable when it was him touching Nace and there was a layer if soft cotton between their skin.

"Three things you can hear."

Nace's voice. Faint buzzing of the refrigerator. Their heavy breathing.

He nodded again.

"Two things you can smell?"

Tomato soup on the table, steaming from the pot. Faint traces of Nace's cologone.

Another nod.

"One thing you can taste?"

Nothing. Just water he drank earlier. He supposed that counted, though. He nodded.

"Okay. Do you feel a bit better?"

He considered it. He felt exhausted but certainly less overwhelmed. And his hand on Nace's shoulder wasn't painful sensation, but just a neutral one. That was a good sign.

"Yes."

"Alright. Do you want to eat, or would you prefer to lie down on the couch for a bit?"

"Lie down."

This time, when Nace offered him his hand, Kris took it. It was warm and slight callused. Steady.

He took him to the living room and covered him with a blanket when Kris laid down. Turned off the lights.

"I will just go get my plate."

So that was how Kris ended up with his eyes closed, listening to Nace eating his soup. And really, it should have been an annoying sound but somehow...it wasn't.

Then Nace put his plate on the coffee table with a dull clank. Kris cracked his eyes open, just to see Nace looking at him.

"Can I get you water? Or juice? Or...something?"

"Water would be nice."

When Nace came back with a glass, he held it to Kris' lips instead of letting him take it. His cheeks warmed. He drank and tried not to think about how suggestive this looked like.

Nace quietly set the glass aside after he was done and sat back down. Silence streched.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Kris huffed. He supposed he should. He did just barge into Nace's apartment and had a meltdown. Potentially scarred his dog, since Ollie was nowhere to be found.

"I just had a really shitty day. My coffee maching broke, so I had to get a coffee to go from a cafe, which meant I was almost ten minutes late to the practice. And you know how that went, you were there. Jan managed to cut his finger on a string badly and there was blood and I couldn't find my first aid kit because Bojan put it in the wrong drawer-"

"Kris. Breathe."

He fidgeted with his sleeve and took few deep breaths. In and out. In and out. He rubbed his hands over his jeans, letting the texture ground him.

"Right. And then I came home and I was scrolling through Instagram and someone mentioned an article that talked about me and my dad. So I looked it up and it went on to essentially explain how I will never measure up to him and they are sort of right because. No I won't, our careers are different anyway, but then I realized how fucking useless-"

He stopped as Nace took his hands in his own. He gently rubbed over his knuckles and suddenly Kris was tongue-tied.

"Sorry. Should have asked before touching you."

"It's okay."

More than okay, now. It was comforting. He didn't always like touch and not from anyone, but he didn't mind it now.

"You are not your dad and you don't have to be. You are your own person, with your own way of doing things."

Kris opened his mouth, but Nace raised his hand to stop him.

"No-don't interrupt me. I know you know that, but you still try so hard to be perfect all the time. Jesus, Kris you sometimes hold yourself to such impossible standard, it pains me to watch."

Kris simply stared at him. No one ever put it that way. It was always just "You don't have to me like your dad". But never "You don't have to be perfect at all, even in a way specific to you".

"Oh."

Nace's expression softened. He gently pulled him into a hug, Kris' face perfectly fitting between his shiulder and neck. Few tears escaped him as Nace stroked his hair.

"You are good enough as you are. You don't have to try. And you don't have to compete all the time with Bojan, either. Life isn't a competition."

Kris chuckled, despite the tears.

"Kind of feels like it for me."

"Because you never let yourself relax and just...be yourself. Breathe. Relax. I promise you are safe."

Nace's words slowly sank in and to his surprise, he felt like he could finally relax. Let all the bitterness slip away for a moment.

He pulled Nace closer, so they somehow both ended up lying on the couch that was certainly not made for teo men their size. Still, they managed.

"Can you help me with that?"

"With what? Being yourself?"

Kris rolled his eyes and slightly pulled back so he could look at Nace. He reached his hand out and cupped his face. Stroked his thumb over his cheek. Finally allowing himself to do it.

Nace's breath hitched, but he didn't pull away. His eyes carefully considered him.

"No. To relax."

"I don't think your definition of relaxing is a good idea right now."

Kris huffed. Maybe it was the bone deep exhaustion that started to settle in, or the fact that he figured that surely, this day can't get much worse. Whatever it was, it made him lean in, pressing a quick kiss to Nace's lips.

Nace didn't kiss him back.

"I'm sorry-"

"I am not rejecting you. I just don't think this is a good idea while you are this upset."

That was...infuriatingly reasonable. Still, Kris felt embarrassed and slightly disappointed. It felt like a rejection.

Nace sighed.

"Kris. I promise we can talk about this later. For now...how about you get some rest? You look tired."

Kris bit his lip. He was tired. But he was also very comfortable with Nace next to him. He snuggled back into his neck.

"Only if you stay."

Nace kissed the side of his head.

"Always."

Not everything was okay, and however his talk with Nace later went, not everything will magically get solved. But maybe for now...Kris could relax. Just for a bit.

With that as his last thought, he drifted off into a dreamless sleep. Safe and sound.

#nacekris #my writing #joker out fanfic #kris guštin #nace jordan #joker out

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