#my feet fucking HURT. not using them isnt even helping im just DYING over here

[leoxxii]

i am on the Verge Of Tears™️

#work. WORK SUCKS ACTUALLY. #ive only been on for about 4-5 hours so far w a break #but today they kept me in for EIGHT #and one break #but THERES NO SITTING DOWN #4 hours of standing?? tolerable #EIGHT HOURS OF NONSTOP STANDING AND WALKING?? #i was literally limping to get back to my room and now that im lying down #my feet fucking HURT. not using them isnt even helping im just DYING over here #i just want to cry im so tired #my dad says all jobs fucking suck for a week or two as ur body adjusts #but MY GOD. #thankfully i have the next two days off to recover #and i shouldn't work more than 6 hours next time i go in #so hopefully they cut me some Fucking Slack im on my knees over here #literally i cannot stand up #😭

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas : The villain’s little hero

Also on AO3! 

TL;DR:  All Might, Japan's number 1 villain has a successor. The problem? His successor is a hero hopeful. All Might will stop at nothing to make sure his kid gets to live his dream.

au where all might is a villain raising izuku to be a hero!

quirkless izuku, his backstory is mostly the same

all might decided that hero work had too much red tape. if he was going to take down afo, he needed the freedom to do whatever he had to and he wasnt getting that working within the law

so hes a,,, viilllaaaiinnn?? like. stain. but less murdery, would also save civilians if they were in danger

he has 0 qualms about crippling fake heroes but hes not a fan of murder

nighteye is still his sidekick, he doesnt use his quirk on allmight bc all might h a t e s it

hes kinda on board with "the future is only set in stone because you've seen it now" so he wants the freedom to break fate. but its very useful to get info, so nighteye just uses it on other people

hero to the people villain to literally everyone else

allmights villain costume is reallll similar to his hero costume. just less eye bleeding

he has longer grey hair too.

all mights bronze age costume is basically his villain costume thanks for listening

david shield is still in this story

david agrees w all might and like,,, sneaks him stuff on the downlow

all might told him ab. his quirk because who on earth is gonna believe that one america man about japans worst supervillain?

also melissa is a Soft Young Woman and she is all mights favourite person on this fucking planet until he meets izuku

all might went to ua, only defected after completing his hero training because he wanted to be trained by the people he was going to screw over

izuku has always kinda been a big fan of all might. not openly because hes legally a villain and very much paints himself as one, but his quirk is one of the most amazing things izuku has ever seen

when he looks closer, all might has never let a civilian get hurt once hes been on scene. hes taken hits to protect housing, hes pulled heroes from the line of fire

izuku watches his sports festivals and wonders why? why did all might, the man who happily told the world he'd stop at nothing to keep them safe, suddenly flip sides like that for no reason?

izuku doesnt buy it

izuku's big yellow backpack is a big red one in this universe, hes had it so long its gone pink but he still loves it

the sludge villain

all might saves him and izuku is crying. allmight thinks its because hes scared but izuku just turns to him with this big weepy eye smile and gives him the most genuine thanks he thinks hes ever been given

(its honestly the shock of that that makes him deflate into small might, which has izuku scrambling to find tissues and called an ambulance before he thinks better of calling emergency services for All Might)

izuku is like "Im SO SORRY SIR ARE YOU oK"

and all might is like ",,, b  oy"

izuku softly asking

"can,, can i still be someone with out a quirk? can i still make a difference?"

all might doesnt get the chance to anser because there is a massive explosion in the distance

its bakugo!! hes dying

the sludge villain got away bc izuku and all might were chatting a little

izuku hears it and he feels this terrible realization, because its probably not bakugo? but its definitely bakugo because izuku's life is falling to pieces

he sprints towards him and katsuki will n e v e r admit it but he feels hope in that moment because some one is trying to help. even if its just izuku, he wasnt totally left for dead

all might sees this tiny, nervous, quirkless kid run straight up to a villain that almost killed him seconds before to save someone what looks like they'd rather die

and he thinks

"no one deserves one for all more than him"

and allmight, the most wanted villain in japan, maybe the world, jumps in

the heroes look at him and they are scared. if they couldnt take the sludge villain, what is all might going to do to them? but the scariest man in japan, the person parents tell their kids about to stop them from going out at night, blows the sludge villain to tiny pieces and carefully, gently, places the two boys by the heroes

before he vanishes before they can call for backup or even ask why

izuku gets yelled at by the heroes because the heroes are scared and angry they couldnt stop either of the villains and izuku is so overwhelmed that hes crying and he can hardly breathe

bakugo doesnt even yell at him because hes so dazed about everything that happened and he cant make himself yell at this sobbing kid that used to be his friend

(bakugo is holding izukus hand like hes going to crush it but its the only thing keeping izuku present)

izuku is walking home and hes still hicuping and crying because he almost died and the heroes hate him and he feels a hand on his shoulder, and a soft :"its ok now my boy"

he knows its all might but he cant help but hide his face in his shirt and sob

all might gets down so he can look izuku in the eye

"you asked me if you could be someone with out a quirk and i didnt get the chance to answer. my answer? you already are someone. you are someone that inspired me, a villain, to save the day. you are going to be amazing"

and looks him dead in the eye "you'll do amazing things, even with out a quirk. but, you of all people deserve one, and no matter what you chose to do with it, it can be yours. hero, villain or someone in between"

izuku looks at this villain

this painfully thin villain, who just saved his life and who has unimaginable strength

and he throws his arms around his waist and sobs

inko isnt a great mum in this au and she likes to basically pretend izuku doesnt exist

izuku trains a lot and has to make his own food bc his mum just ignores him

he sneaks out at night to clear trash and sneaks back in before dawn to clean the sand from his hair

he smells like saltwater and rust, and he hasnt slept more than 4 hours a night in weeks and katsuki is worried

all might sees him crumbling with a smile stuck on his face and he wants to stop him from self-destructing, but the kid will never learn his lesson until he feels his body give up under what hes doing to it. if all might steps in he'll do it again and again until no one stops him and hes never learnt his limit.

so he waits and he watches while he pretends he cant see the bags under his eyes and pretends that everytime izuku sways on his feet he doesnt feel a jolt of deep panic

did he do this? if he the reason izuku looks like hes falling apart before his eyes?

the kid passes the fuck out and all might tells him off in a soft dad way and izuku cries bc why does this villain care more than his mum does

and all might catches the end of that little mumble, and feels terrible so he pretends he didnt hear and takes him for lunch

they go to a cafe and all might buys izuku the cutest slice of cake and a big ass bowl of katsudon and some fancy fucking tea and covers the kids eyes every time he tries to look at the prices

izuku looks at all might and asks

"are you buying me katsudon with crime money"

and all might looks sheepish and izuku giggles like an idiot and says "dont tell me ill feel bad!!!"

all might grins bc this kid is honestly the only reason he hasnt stabbed a pro hero in a few months bc hes so fucking sweet

he has to carry izuku half the way home bc the kid could barely lift his chopsticks and almost fell asleep in the booth after he finished eating

and allmight, skinny and kinda scary is giving his 15 year old a piggy back and someone says "you're such a good dad!" and he almost coughs up his last lung

izuku mumbles sleepily and hes has the biggest warm and fuzzy feeling and hes going to yell bc hes All Might the No. 1 Villain and this fucking kid is drooling on his sweater but he would die for him

some random stranger on the street commenting on how it was rly fortunate that izuku inherited his adorable smile from his father

all might, abt to burst into tears: whack

allmight is easily flustered even when hes killed a man

he comes home and inko isnt there so he has to like, wake up izuku to get him to open the door and he feels bad bc izuku is a Sleepy Man

izuku mumbles that he cant ever tell if shes at home or not because nothing changes and all might feels a wave of "wait my son isnt being parented enough"

so he makes izuku a cup of tea and tucks him into bed after he has a shower because izuku is His Son Now Inko

hes like

sitting in the living room reading the paper and he hears inko's car and hes like ",,, fuck it im walking out the front door im no coward"

she doesnt even notice and hes going to scream because does she have a brain

inko, spaced out, tired and terrible: oh is the tall man here for izuku :))) thats great :)))

all might is screaming bc"" do you get let weird men into see your tiny son>???? what the fuck???

hes so small inko??? and you?? let random men in?????

all might would yeet her into the sun if he could but his boy needs an actual family member to make going to ua easier

inko is kinda mentally ill. she is depressed and often forgets she has izuku. like shes not always being terrible she just sometimes forget to do basic things

one time she locked izuku out of the house for 10 hours and he had to sleep next to the front door

one month she didnt buy any food so by the end of it he was starving and out of his own money and there was n o t h i n g in the house, but inko would go out to eat every night and lunch and not take her son

allmight is upset bc izuku didnt tell him but izuku is embarrassed. embarrassed that he was forgotten by his own mum, that he couldnt do anything to help her or himself and honestly mad he was so hungry all might noticed bc he didnt want to bug him

it was getting to the point that katsuki actually slipped some change into his bag with a candy bar

#bnha au #bnha #villains hero au #villain all might #all might #midoriya izuku #midoriya #deku #katsuki bakugou #toshinori yagi #yagi #midoriya inko #dadmight #david shield #melissa shield #mha #boku no hero

[mieczyhale]

because tumblr is the way that it is i have no idea what you have/nt seen?? so i guess here’s just all the recent TUA-related shit ;snklfd @hellomyguru

it sure would be nice of them to notify people about notifications wouldn’t it??

my tags on this post:: #y e s #okay like i love the lil klaus they gave us #for sure#but klaus has curls?? and bby didnt really?? and like it makes sense bc considering reginald's.. everything.. he would have done whatever he#could to tame them / keep them under control yknow?? he doesnt like different and he doesnt like things that arent prim and proper#which is what he'd consider curls to NOT be#esp. with how wild those curls woulda been like#and i mean i know adult klaus's hair was more mess & not really curly but towards the end of the season you could def see his hair rebelling#so #anyway #here's wonderwall 

my tags on this post::   #klaus and dave#even if you play it with dave being 30 too instead of 40 this is still fucking funny#i can imagine this interaction perfectly and it kills me sfhkdjccj

a post on my change in how i tag my original TUA posts

a question you asked that i answered

a post on klaus, reginald, and medicine

a shitpost about dave

my reply to a reply on my broken jaw post

my reply to your reply on my broken jaw post

my tags on this post:: #does klaus know what he threw out tho?? like he barely glanced at the stuff he pulled out of the box before throwing it away#he clearly thought that whatever it was wasnt important - i mean he also wouldnt have cared bc gotta get them drugs baby but still#and at what point would he have told five that he threw out some of their dads shit?? like.. at which interaction would that have made sense#the dumpster?? not really. five immediately declares he doesn't care what klaus is doing and then klaus is distracted by the opportunity to#get some money in an easier way than normal and then he bit into a dumpster bagel and five was leaving. he left.#OH and now that im thinking more about it - klaus refers to the stuff from the box as 'priceless crap' / 'priceless shit' so there's a#chance he A. really didnt pay attention to what he was throwing away - which makes sense considering his desperation#or B. he forgot. drugs arent known for being great for your memory and then a lot of shit went down really fast so..#the lab?? also wouldnt have made sense for a few reasons but mostly bc at no point did they talk about anything other than fake eyes and#relationships. during the family meeting that five appears in the middle of?? maybe. but five had a very narrow focus and the others#talked a lot and over each other and the whole time klaus is off to the side sick - very clearly having a hard time focusing and staying#upright and again - a lot has fucking happened - so there's no way he would've even considered the papers from 10 months ago as being#relevant. IF he remembered them at all.#oh and then he didnt even really acknowledge the apocalypse thing until episode 6 and he spent all of episode 4 being tortured#and he came back and spent episode 5 just trying to adjust to being back - having just lost dave and left a warzone - and he just.. has his#grief to deal with so nothing else is even on his radar#what im saying is#there's a lot going on and there never would've been a time to bring it up even if he did know/remember what he threw away#in my big dumb pan opinion#i know this post isnt that serious but i read it and had to word vomit#anyway #sgkskccj #carry on y'all

my tags on this post::   #oh shit fuck!!! this!!!!!! im always here for emotions and powers being tied - ESPECIALLY when people dont know it#including the person who has the powers like... everyone being oblivious fucks#which is kind of why i agree with and support klaus's powers being tied to his emotions. 1. people just out here being completely oblivious#and ignorant towards klaus and everything related to him and 2. klaus being just as oblivious like.. between over half a lifetime of#substance abuse and addiction?? that happened in the first place bc klaus was terrified of and hated his powers?? there is so much that he#can do. i personally believe he's incredibly powerful and the longer he stays sober the more everybody is gonna see that#and none of them will expect it. tbh also?? i firmly believe - despite his alien status and knowing things - that not even reginald#had any fucking idea. bc i mean he clearly had no real idea of how klaus's powers worked. his training decisions proved that. his#experiments proved that. is there anything in canon to support any of this hc - you ask - why yes. yes there is. in my opinion of course. i#know not everyone sees things the same way. but 1. klaus returning from vietnam. he beat up the suitcase p well but while it sparks?thats it#and throwing it isnt - on its own - going to make it explode. thats just not believable. its a time traveling briefcase. that shits STURDY#and if im remembering right - it didnt explode right away. it didnt happen until klaus screamed and i dont think thats a coincidence#he does have telekinesis after all. and 2. making ben corporeal in the last episode. that did not seem like a conscious decision. he ran#into that room. got shot sat. ducked. and then suddenly he has glowing hands and bentacles was seen by all. it all happened in a matter of#seconds and it would've freaked anyone out but with his powers klaus wanted ben there - he wanted ben to help - even if he didnt know it#himself. in one second he had elevated emotions - elevated anxiety and possibly fear and he wanted to do something just.. ANYTHING. he#wanted to not die and he wanted his siblings to not die and he wanted to help but he alone couldnt and ben is his closest#brother - sorry not sorry - and then also sorry not sorry but ptsd?? from vietnam and guns?? yeah. so everything just.. fell together and#it triggered his powers. and i can see that happening a lot. he's having a hard day and he can see dave and talk to him but he#cant be held by him and it just makes everything worse and suddenly dave is THERE there and klaus doesnt know how he did it but w.e#he's just so happy he did. and he accidentally conjures patch while he and diego are talking about her and diego thinks klaus did it on#purpose. to hurt him? idk. but he's pissed and klaus is just confused - not really registering the heartache he had been feeling for diego#when she suddenly appeared. im leaving this with 2 examples only bc imma run outta tags otherwise fkdmdnd BUT give me klaus levitating for#the first time when he's sitting cross legged on the floor of the living room or standing idk but he's content and sleepy ans suddenly#there's confused voices and shouting and he opens his eyes to find he's in the same position but now he's five feet off the ground and#WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK yknow?? oooh and more on his telekinesis?? unintentionally launching shit at people when he gets pissed. luther takes a#little gardening shovl to the face. the others keep treating him like shit - like he hasnt changed - and he snaps during a meeting and a#vase JUST misses somebody's head or smth?? it would be great. and dont even get me started on the Not Fucking Dying aspect bc thats a whole#other rodeo. but even that.. i think its emotionally tied and how long he stays dead depends on how he felt when he died. he can control it#from the other side yknow?? anyway i def need to do an actual post on this i think later bc im outta tags lmao

#maison speaks #hellomyguru

[sainadazai]

When your crush is angry all the time

Ch.5

"I don't think fire's all that bad, you know"

3rd person pov

°•○●○•°•○●○•°

As the sun hung high in the sky the h/t haired girl stumbled around the train station in search of a restroom. Y/n had never experienced the mundane tasks a commoner would usually persue on a daily. Things like public transit, or any transit for that matter, were an enigma to her.

So while elder men stared a little too long and young children pointed at her in recognition, she spun in circles like a lost puppy.

"Its just a fucking bathroom, should there be someone here to direct people or something! Ugh and whats with the school girl fetish, these old guy are creeps..." she mumbled to herself continuing to get more and more lost on the platform.

Meanwhile, the rest of 1-A were making their way to internships as well, Midoriya scrolled into some old guys house, Kirishima bumped into his metal replica, and Bakugou held his grump posture and nonchilauntly entered the top 3 heros agency. He was expecting to at least learn something from this guy, or gain real life experience with villains. He never anticipated being scrutinized for his personality. No shit I'm scary, Im trying to kill shitty villains not make teenage girls put a picture of me on their wall.

For the first day of this new challenged everbody seemed to be having a ridiculously mundane time. Not y/n, though. No our main character was going through it, once she made it to the restroom, she got confused by how easily the toilet paper ripped in her hand and spent 20 minutes trying to get at least one whole time out of the stubborn roll. Then, when she opened up her bag to view the new hero-suot her mother helped design...she found strings¿

She ended up having to look at an example picture and read a guide on how to put what where. It took an additional hour considering the tightness of everpiece of fabric and when she stepped out of the stall to look in the mirror, she deadpanned. How could her mother hate her this much? It was already a burden being so sexy, but this? This was crazy.

She wasnt sure weather she should take a million photos, or never leave the bathroom and cry all day. However when her phone rang, a call from Mr.Woods agency, she realized how late she already must be.

In her rush, y/n also forgot about the creeps men and was recieving many stares, that went unnoticed. Until somebody had the audacity to touch her. It was just a ghost of his finger tips on the underneath of her ass that was no doubt on full display. That would not go accepted, as a girl who had turned her past trauma into nothing but a small personality traits, she wasnt scared. Still, as a woman who absolutely idolizes herself, or so she says, no one in this train station deserved the touch of her perfect, shiny, s/c skin.

The last error that secured her terrible first day was how y/n spun around and grabbed the mans fingertips. When she took a glance at him, he was smiling as if he had acomplished something. Boy was he wrong, only coming to realized so when the y/h girl suddenly had sprouted a vine from his finger.

He watched in fear as it began to grow and wrap around him, all the while the young girl he'd never met before let out a sickening aura that couldve suffocate him then and there. The vine continued to curl up around his middle and ring finger, slowly meeting the flash of his palm.

Once the growing stopped, y/n had almost decided to let him go. A part of her new that her plan wasn't well thought through, and he could be an innocent guy that accidentally touched her.

However, aggression outwayed logic and she looked him deep in the eye.

"You like using these fingers to touch things your not supposed to?"

"N-n-"

"Shhh, dont worry, im just gonna make sure you dont go touching things that arnt yours, okay?" She made an aggresive fist with the hand not touching him and the vine squeezed in. Anyone a foot away would be able to tell, but the both of them could hear how his two fingers snapped and bent under the pressure.

With a satisfied grin at the whispering man, y/n decided he had learned his lesson. Wow look at that, and I didnt even need some manly hero to come save me. Atta girl y/n.

Little did she know that not only did her pro-hero boss come to look for her, but je also saw the whole disaster. He was not pleased to say the least.

Y/n pov

°•○●○•°•○●○•°

As the tree like man sat down in his office chair across from me, all I could do was look to my feet. I didnt feel particularily had about my actions, however, I did feel bad about being late.

While it is fun to be spontanious and act like theres nothing to lose, I wasn't lying when I said I wanted to control the earth aspect of my quirk. Ill never admit it if someone asks, but sometimes the only way I can sleep at night is knowing how strong my quirk is. Knowing that they cant hurt me if I stay strong.

Still, it just seems that as I grow older, the people trying to get to be get bolder and more powerful. Some might even say...they get smarter, too. Thats a scary thought; that if I want to stay alive at all I need to be constantly improving. I am not sure if I want to stay alive or not, but Ill be damned if dying or living isnt my choice.

Feeling the need to break the silence, I began my rant on all the reasons I had come up with that justify my actions. I was planning it on the way out here.

"Look, im sorry mr.woods. I know im not very heroic and shit, but when perverts to pervert things somebody has to do something, and its not like anybody else there would have scared a glance if I didnt save myself-"

"Your wrong."

"Huh- I wasnt done. Anyways i-"

"L/n you are wrong."

"Dude im trying to-"

"There was heroes on patrol, how else did you think i found you? There were real heroes ready to protect you, if you had simply shouted people would have been alarmed of such. I dont understand kids and their need to do everything alone." He rolled his eyes behind his mask and continued to stare at me.

"Excuse me but I dont think your in a place to comment on how I react to myself being touched. He was gonna get my skin dirty and for what, two seconds of his school girl fantasy. Ew."

"Your skin....dirty?"

"Yes, he is nowhere near my standards on someone who should be allowed to touch me...not even a brush of the fingers..ugh!"

"Alright well, I cant get you in trouble because then I get in trouble...so, tell me about your quirk while we go on patrol."

His chair sqeaked against the floor as he stood up and it slid back. Then he motioned for me to follow by painting out the door.

Relieved that I didn't have to talk about all the fake reasons people aren't allowed to touch me, and that I could finally get outside so my quirk would stop suffocating me, I was quick to exit the building.

I'm not sure if its the fact that ive only been using a forth of her, but my quirks side effects have been so shitty recently. To the point that our school nurse estimsted my new rate for being inside for an extended period of time was about three hours.

I havent actually combusted in years, but I've been close and god does it hurt. My chest starts to squeeze and I can feel all the energy drain from my body, then pieces of me start to get hold and cold at the same time.

"So what really is your quirk?"

I looked up at the hero next to me as we continued on down the street of the inner City.

"How much did Aizawa tell you?"

"I-he said...she has all the right elements? And told me I'd figure it out.." He scratched the back of his head.

I smirked at that. Who knew aizawa actually listened to the words I said. I was pretty sure after the whole sulking chrollos dick thing, he would have permanently tuned me out.

"Heh, that raggedy ann bastard" I smile smugly.

"So, what does it mean?"

"Ahh, okay so, did you go to U.A?"

"Um yes kid, why?"

Then im certain je knows of my family, explaining my quirk will be easier. God, this really is my favorite part.

I reached my left hand out, knowing he was right handedly and would respond well to it and then spoke.

"Hi, nice to meet you, im y/n l/n of the elementus royal quirk family."

Once he shook my hand I did a polite curtsey, as I learned in ballet to do that instead of bowing. Its much more fun to do this at family event, where I get to wear big dresses and pretend im important...but this'll have to do.

"The-i-oh shit..." He mumbled the last part in defeat, likely just figuring out what he'd gotten himself in to.

"So, im guessing you've got ...."

"Total control, yup" I confirmed.

"And you wanna focus on earth elements, like what flowers?"

I smirk up at him allowing my aura to put an intimidating facade.

"Actually I was thing more like venus fly traps" as I said traps I let my hands clap together mimicking the plant and bit at the air with my teeth.

He stopped walking and just glanced from side to side, waiting for me to start making sense again.

Until we heard some crying in the distance.

The two of our heads shot over and were met with a strange sight. There were three young boys, looked about 8¿ and a man, hero maybe? Crouched in front of them not looking all that nice. He had spike blonde hair, red eyes, gauntlets on his wris-

"Oh my god its bakugou, look sir! Thats the hot guy I switched schools for!"

"Wha-"

"BAKUGOUUUU!! HEYYY!"

his head slowly shifted from the kids to me and it seemed to only make him more angry. Then, once again I couldn't help but bask in the pure aggression...in his eyes.

They were red, fitting for the anger thry held, but it was beautiful. It was passionate, the way he could yell for hours about god knows what because he cares. He may care about petty things, or silly things, but he always cares so much. So passionately. That I can see it in his eyes.

"Oh my, whAt is this costume deary?"best jeanist spoke from ahead of us as we approach.

"Hi sir, sorry about the skin showing, my quirk is heavily enhanced the more my pours are exposed to the natural elements, especially oxygen. If I was more covered parts of my body would begin to go completely numb. Also doesnt my body look amazing! Im a lot more in shape since you saved me last"

I blamed happily at jeanist. Though we arent neceserilly close, he is definitely a great hero and has always been someone who easily sees through my façaude. Plus his fashion sense is wonderful and I often send him pictures of my outfits. Although he doesnt respond I know he sees them and if they were bad he would be mean about it instead of ignoring it.

"Well. It definitely gives your body..access to that. And the sword?"

Ahh...the sword that I liked to carry. It was now stored in its place on my back.

"Call it a good luck charm, plus, we cant rely only on our quirks, then we are just weak people with strong powers. Rather than strong people."

I was always one to put on a show for him, as I do for lost of pro heroes. Its a lot more fun to say things like your all serious and fancy and smart sometimes. Its my little inside joke with myself, like to laugh at how easily people are awed by it.

Like how even though children were still crying bakgou was staring at me face void of emotion, completely struck at my words.

Definitely not..staring at my body that was exposed. Not eyeing the tight strap that wraps my left leg, that he doesnt know is a funcional lasso.

Noticing him, im quick to avert my attention.

"Hey bakugou~"

"Tch you really went from shitty princess to slutty princess huh?"

"You really went from telling deku you'd be number one hero, to making kids cry on the street, huh?" I challenged

I heard the crying boys laugh a little, just the age reminded me of my brother, Im sure they have nothing in common, but I havent seen any of my brothers in quite some time so I suppose a small part of me was just projecting.

I hated that they were crying, though. Ussually I dont like kids, they are stinky and gross and the main reason people have been ruining my life up til now. However, noticing these three reacting to bakugou in a way I wish emotionally available enough for, it made me feel obligated to help them. Wierd, huh.

"Hey, did that guy use his fire all scary?"

"Yeah, he was gonna kill us"

"Fires scary."

I giggled a bit, I knew fire like the back of my hand. It was the first thing I mastered as a child and the way I see bakugou use it doesnt to the element justice.

"Hm, well, I dont think so...can I show you something?"

The kid in the middle, apparently the braver of them, lifted his gaze from the concrete to meet my eyes. Just as I crouched down to my knees in front of them he nodded up at me.

I smiled at this, proud that I earned his trust for...some odd reason.

My hands formed a cup shape in front of him and I focused my ears so I could hear the blood rushing through my own brain, like waves. This was how I learned to use elements singularly: by using my internally noise to block out everything else.

I first allowed a small line of fire to dance around, now bigger than a candle wick. Then through another, and another as the boy watched carefully. Not yet impressed his face was still caustious. However I continued focusing my energy, feeling my body, the air around me, the heat of the sun, even remember the passion from bakugous crimson eyes.

I as I did so the many small flames twirled and twisted within eachother forming into a beautiful blue and orange fluctuating flower.

The boy looked into my hands mouth now agape, tears dried, fear gone. Then, again, for some reasons unbeknownst to me... I felt a sense of pride.

He tapped his friends so they would look up and I continued making my fire into different things, birds, planes, people. The kids were entranced.

I looked back to see the two pros staring at me with a certain level of pride mixer with shock. While bakugou seemed at a loss for words. God knows why this time?

"I don't think fire is all that bad you know..."

"Pft, yeah, I know kid," with that I threw my little flames above their heads and let the sparks fall down of them like shiny glitter. Then, overwhelmed with this horrible feeling in my chest. I retreatdd to my boss for the weak. Was that..happiness? Ew.

#bakugou x reader #bakugou x you #mha bakugou #bakugou katsuki #bakusquad #bnha bakugo katsuki #mha deku #mha fanfiction #mha todoroki #mha fluff

[askpet-archive]

PET Ep 9

Ari sat up slightly, a bad feeling in her gut. She pulled out her phone and dialed Arthurs number as fast as she could move, grabbing Eras book.. WHy does Arthur only have one life, oh my god oh my god Ari flipped through the pages, letting out a squeak when noticing the others also only have one life, what the fuck was going on "Fuck! ANgy, Arthur- Vincent! whoever this is! Why the fuck are you all at only one life!" she screamed into the phone, worry in her voice Era wakes up, looking over to Ari in confusion "Wha." "ARTHURS GONNA WHAT?!" She screamed, panic in her tone "I DIDNT SET UP ANYTHING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING TO KILL ARTHUR?! HE WAS AT OVER A HUNDRE DLIVES JUST A SECOND AGO!" Era shifts away from Ari slightly, deciding to just listen to her "Cre-creepy woman!?" Ari was starting to tear up not, shaking obvious "How is she holding him up that high? mgic? wings?? Why is my brother going to die please save him he cant die- why is she holding him up?!" her voice sounded kind of choked, she obviously had no part of this "My little brother cant die- you guys c-cant either- sa-save him and g-get away-" Era is so confused right now, the only thing she knows is that Arthur is probably going to die. She lightly pats Ari on the shoulder "Hey- hey- calm down, count to ten, and try to focus on breathing. What's going on?" She'd hug Ari right now but wants to make sure she's okay first Ari took a deep breath "what is she t-telling you t-to do? l-listen to her- if s-s-shes just gon-gonna-- d-dont-- just-- try-try and c-catch him-" she stopped, taking a deep breath and holding the phone away from her ear to stare at Era "i have to go back right now we wont be able to get there in time my little brother is going to die an-and-" she choked on a sob, tears now going down her cheeks. Era pauses, "Wait- Okay, okay," She softly hugs her "Shh, calm down, I'll go try and see if there's any way to leave before the barrier is gone okay?" She lets go of Ari, standing up "Try and calm down, okay?" Era heads inside of the Acachalla house to go ask anyone if there's a way to leave Ari put the phone back to her ear "p-please dont l-let my brother die- please..i- ill try and..ill...I cant get there in time- oh my god- Arthur--..Angy just, listen to the woman if shes saying something- dont. let. her. k-kill. him. Ill...Billy! E-Era! ask Billy!" she yelled slightly, her angry-sad tone more obvious when screaming Era proceeds to loudly ask, while inside of the house, "BILLY ARE YOU AWAKE??" Max heard all the yelling and finally took her hood off. "I-Is someone dying?" "AcTUALLY, you are correct," "Oh. Whos dying??" She began to shake Billy to wake him up, as he indeed was fast asleep. "Uhm, Arthur, maybe everyone else. Billy wake up." "Oh gosh, what are they doing back there??" Billy blinked open his eyes "mmph?? what? dying?? what did i hear bout Dying?" he mumbled, looking at the two people around him "I need to know if there's any way to leave the barrier before 8AM. We need to leave now, everyone else is going to die, they only have a few lives left." "Wait were leaving? I wanna stay here..." Max frowned, it was nice here, oddly Ari choked on a sob hearing Angy say something "Arthur- is he okay- is-- where is he- Phone- give to him--" she stred at the book as all their names joined one page, number switching to five "..H-HOW ARE YOU Sh-SHARING LIVES?!" Billy jolted when hearing that "theres no way to leave the barrier no. wait, sharing lives? what the dang?" he got to his feet and ran over to Ari to look at the book "..that shouldnt be able to happen, someones messing with their life count.." Max stood up, stretching. There goes her happy party. Era follows Billy "Okay okay, so there is absolutely, no way, at all, to leave?" "No way, at all. no." Billy sighed "I would fly one of you over there but i dont know if the barrier will let you leave tonight. only im able to get out, from what ive learned. anytime ive tried bringing someone they lost a life." he muttered Max followed, "Isnt there anyone around here who can make a portal out or something? Plus that would be much faster for us to get there.." "Arthur? Arthur??" she heard her brothers voice, and is trying to take deep breaths now "what happened. Why did you almost die, why were you at one life, why re you sharing lives!? nonono, forget all that, are you okay, are you hurt at all? i mean i understand you're probably scared to death but hurt? and if not to calm yourself down take deep b-breaths- and- and- if you a-are hu-hurt- t-try just- pressing on the wounds- an-and-" she choked on a sob "i thought id lost you Arth- oh my god--" she murmured "do you have any med packs??" shes concerned, shes just so fuc king w orr ied "Im guessing no one in this insane city can make portals? Or am I just getting ignored here?" Billy looked over "not portals out of the city." "Laaame" "Well, this is going great." "I didnt do an-anythign i swear!" she sobbed into the mic angrily "i dont kno-know whats g-going on- im just w-w-worried about y-you because a-apparently you a-almost died-" "i forgot Arthur- i f-forgot i- i didnt want a-anything t-to happen-- i-- i- Im trying to find a way to get there now- ill come find you alright? j-just- stay away f-from the crazy wo-woman- try a-and hide- and im a-atleast 80% s-sure the call w-w-was lying so- you- you shouldnt encounter a-anything- i s-swear i had n-no clue t-this would happen- i just-- i thought it was a normal call y-you and Ang co-could handle.." "..ill b-be there asap. If yo-you have to. and h-have a gun. Show n-no mercy to anything you find." she sighed quietly "...d-dont c-cry anymore, alright? y-you've got Vincent and Angy to pr-protect you and ill be there soon." she heard his voice. She didnt give a chance to respond before hanging up, stumbling to her feet "I need to go home- Now." she muttered, glaring at Billy, who just sighed "theres no way of gettin out kiddo." "Wheres the barrier at anyways, like can we just go.....right up to it right now?" Max looked at the sky, it looked weird compared to the sky anywhere shes been before.... -------- Update on Spop. She is currently trying to stitch Klondike back up, but is poking herself with the needle than Klondike Update on Ari, she sat with Billy trying to comfort her for awhile until she fricking passed the fuck out on the grass from exhaustion and tears Era pauses, having been waiting for the barrier to disappear since she couldn't fall back asleep. After a moment, she blinks, checking the time. "Ah!" Era shuffles over to where Ari was currently passed out, shaking her slightly "Arrriii wake up." Ari shot awake in an instant. She looked up at the sky and jolted, stumbling to her feet "ge-get Max and Spop-- Home- now-" she stammered, holding her head from gettin up way too fast. Billy came out of the house, looking over "...? Oh, i was gonna come tell you, its, its 8:30. but i guess you know that." he chuckled slightly "choices are car, or i can try carrying one or two of you at a time, though the second option might be a bit dizzying." Ari looked at Era with a pleading look. She had to get to Arthur as fast as she possibly could "Okay- Okay- Uhm, is the second option faster?" Billy nodded "i mean yea, i can fly pretty fast" Ari kind of just, put out an arm, so Billy, from instinct, grabbed it, gesturing so he could grab Eras"im gonna, hope neither of you are too afraid of going to high." "Haha, I'm terrified of it." She holds out her own arm "I just won't look down and I'll probably be fine. BUT, don't, go to high. Billy nodded, grabbing Era's arm "i can put you down at anytime if you wanna ditch this.. so." wings kinda just, appeared on his back, hello spawning "Max! Spop! ill be back to carry you guys soon, got it?" and up they went, high up but not to high. Ari looked down at the ground, making an inhumane noise Spop was leaning on the wall, asleep with Klondike in her arms An alarm went off, it was Maxs phone. She woke up and went to go turn it off, even though she knew she had to get up. She really didnt want to leave. Era proceeds to stare ahead, not looking down despite her curiosity Billy sped up..pretty fast. the ground was like, pretty much just a rapid blur, Ari screeched and grabbed Eras free hand for comfort, she hates this, she hates this,,, Era is trying so hard to not scream right now, gripping onto Ari's hand ------------ billy just casually drops off two females outside the building then goes back to get the other two females Ari got to her feet quickly, holding her head and looking up..it was..still night here. She checked her phone, how the fuck was it still only around 9:30 here? So Arthur would've called...15? 20 minutes ago?? okay, whatever "Okay, in...in here." she muttered, running around to one of the windows and grabbing at the boards, trying to pull it off "Era, come help me out with this!" she called, not caring a crazy lady was probably watching them Era runs over to Ari, proceeding to try and pull off the boards with her Ari heard a tiny crack and pulled on it harder, watching the wood come off and quickly hopping inside, pulling Era in before the board reappeared Era stumbles a bit when being pulled in, blinking and pulling out her flashlight when realizing it was a lot darker then expected "Okay so.. what are we expecting to see here?" Arthur's probably still just. Walking around in the darkness, pulling Angy along so he has something to cling to. His eyes have gotten used to the darkness at this point, but he's still scared to death and wants to make sure he's not left by himself. "Arthur, for one." Ari took a flashlight out of her quiver, flicking it on, keeping her hand over the light so it wasnt too bright. "Angy for two. and..maybe Vincent." "Nono, like, evil demon things. What are we expecting with that?" "Nothing. besides the crazy lady, which.. uh, we see that?..haha, we can just say goodbye" she moved a finger across her neck to show what she meant, giving a soft grin "but i doubt that'll happen." Era pauses, getting her crossbow ready as well "Well, let's hope it won't. Lets go look for them now. Since there's supposedly a crazy lady we.. probably shouldn't yell for them." Angy, her wrist still in Arthur's grip, stopped for a second for what she thought were two faint voices. "Do you hear that..?" Ari's werecat ears were useful in this situation, and she grabbed Eras arm, darting out of the room they were in and moving her flashlight around to see around "Angy?" she called quietly, worry in her tone Era follows along with Ari's movements, trying not to fall from all of the sudden being dragged around "What, the random creaking every now in then? All the other sounds my head likes to make up? Because yeah, yeah I d- oh that." He wasn't sure who that was, and didn't CARE who that was, he was just. scared. So the voice makes him cling to Angy even harder. The young girl heard a voice calling out her name, she debated to reply back, thinking it might be a trick but decided in the end to call out as well "Hello? Who's there..?" Era pauses, whispering over to Ari "I think that's them." Ari pulled Era towards the sound, not calling again. After a few minutes, they had light, from Ari shining the flashlight on them...oh, thats Ari releasing Era and throwing her arms around her brother in a hug "oh thank god your okay-" she muttered, no escape Arth, this is overly protective sister, she kind of, looked at Angy with a grateful, and worried smile, making sure to remember getting out med packs Angy sighed with relief "Thank god it was actually you, I thought we were dead.." Era walks over to them as quietly as possible "What's- what's even been happening?" He'd sCREAm AT FiRst Because holy Shit he didn't expect that, but soon just hugging back whoever this was because Shit it's still dark. Ari shined the light enough on both her and Arthur so he could see her and she could see him "Sorry for scaring you, i was just really fricking worried-" she muttered "We got tricked by that.. woman thing.. she told us to give up our stuff for the "test" Ari had made for us." Angy went up to Era "We refused and that's when she took Arthur way high up.." "Oh god, that sounds terrifying." "i had nothing to do w-with making the test. i got a call, i answered. common business curtesy. Everything she did was all her. I would never try to get Arthur killed." she kind of, thought about Arthur being high up, and just, shivered "..god i shouldnt have made you guys go on this alone, i shouldn't have left.." she mumbled He's not even respondent enough to say anything back, he's just. hug. helo. His eyes are puffy from tears too haha. Era blinks, shining her flashlight down the hallway "We should get out of here now.." Angy turned back to Ari and placed a hand of her shoulder "It's alright, we knew you wouldn't be capable to do this to Arthur, it was just.." She shook her head before continuing "The good thing is that he's okay and you're here now. Era is right, we need to leave" Ari not letting go of her brother until hes okay with it so, as far as she knows they might just hug for awhile. Shes fine with that. "Im not moving from this spot until Arthur decides to just cling to my arm or back or something." she muttered towards Era, then looked back at Arthur, oh, puff eyes. Uh. um. Shes just gonna, pick him up actually, hopefully hes okay with this. Im still questioning how this girl can lift up someone only one inch smaller then her but okay. Casually tries to give her flashlight to Arthur so she just sticks it in his pocket. "alright, ye, okay. lets go. Arth, tell me if you want me to put you down." shes ready to follow™ Era stares at the group for a moment before turning around, heading back to where they got in from "Yes please put me down-" He doesn't like this o boy it's like the whole 'getting-carried-15-feet-in-the-air' situation all over again, except it's not risking his life or at a far enough height to kill him but he still doesn't like being picked u p. He's definitely gonna use the flashlight though. Ari puts Arthur down, but refuses to let him go, so she just softly holds his arm, if he wants to cling then he can. "Era we arent getting out that way, i hope you know. Board resealed. Angy, mind catchin me up on this weird lady?I mean i know she almost killed Arthur but, is she doin anything else right now? and..wheres Vincent?" Angy quickly followed behind Era, already wanting to get away from anything having to deal with this building. Era passes by where they came out from "I know, but I kinda wanna stay in this general area considering how huge this place is." She stopped for a moment, thinking to herself "Oh no.. Vincent god dammit! He was with us and then he walked away for no reason and we couldn't go for him because it was so dark" "We'll find hiiiim." Ari nodded "Era, we cant. we barely know how much time we have to the woman does..something. So spending to long trying to find this new idiot addition to the team is a pretty bad idea." "I meant, "We'll find him while trying to find a way out on accident" because apparently that's how logic works these days." "..right, okay. anyone have any ideas? we could try bombing it from in here..but, i dont..know if that would work. like, blast the door open." "Ehhhhhhh." The boy is silent. He just wants to hide now. He's also wearing his hood over his head, probably to muffle random sounds. "I mean.. as long as you don't bring the whole building down, I think it's a pretty good idea" "alright.." she just, takes out one of her grenades, flicks off the pin, and throws it at the door, hopefully far enough away from Angy and Era "Heck-" Era proceeds to j u M P™ away from the grenade, wanting to be as far away from it as possible Oh, there goes the explosion.. they out? "Uh..cant see." softly grabs Arthurs other arm to direct the flashlight toward the smoke from the explosion, the door is open.. "out, bolt down the road." she muttered, already hearing footsteps behind them. "Stay away from us crazy lady!" she growled, pulling Arthur out of the building and tryin to run as far away from it as possible, god damn good thing its night, vampire speed. Hope the boyo isnt dizzy Luckily this time Angy didn't get crushed or nearly killed by the explosion and did a little happy dance once she saw the door open. She didn't need to be told to run, the footsteps she heard behind her motivated  her to start running like a mad man. Era paused for a moment from confusion before speeding out the door, she does not want to stay in here any longer then 0 seconds Ari probabl picked Arth up again halfway,, yea. def did. After they were a really good distance away from the building Era just, stops, heavily breathing "Okay, one, I hate running. Two, I hate running. Three, I hate running." Ari set him down once she felt far enough away "s-sorry about that, i just wanted to get you away from there as fast as possible.." she was, kinda concerned by his look, but decided not to question it "Okay, we're heading home like, right away." Aris going to go out to get Arthur more snacks and let himself lock himself in his room probably "Can I nuke the place first?" "no" "I'm gunna nuke it." Era looks over to the building in the distance "Okay guys it's gunna be nuked." "what" b OO O MM M "My job here is done." His eye twitched. He's probably just sitting on the ground now. The boy is Shook. ".....We.. should go home now." Angy took a moment to catch her breath, seeing as she was way out of shape. "Good job guys, thank you Era for blowing up that.. thing But yeah, let's go home.." Era stares at the destroyed building off in the distance for a moment before turning around "Uh-huh. Max and Spop are probably going to be back soon." "How do we get home if we have no form of trasnportation." He'd mumble, realizing they probably knew and he we just asking that question for no reason, mumbling a barely even coherent 'nevermind sorry'. Ari looked at Arthur "nono its fine, its a good question. I dont wanna torture you with my vampire speed though so, we're probably just gonna walk- if you dont want to walk i can carry you but you said you didnt want that-" "Let's just hope that lady got roasted with the building and doesn't decide to catch up to us" Angy said while starting to walk. Era stands in her place, waiting for Ari and Athur to start walking too "Yeah.." The boy gets up and just follows after Angy. Out of everyone else to trust right now, she was the only one, even if all she did was make sure he didn't start screaming and crying in the dark. Era stares at Ari, waiting for her to go as well. She wants to make sure no one is accidentally left behind Ari went in, another direction "ill meet you guys at home okay? i- im gonna go somewhere. Ill be like 5 minutes, probably will meet you there- hopefully-" Era pauses, continuing to stare at her "Be safe," she quietly says before following the others

#episodes

[samanthasroberts]

The Great Dying: Happiness Comes on Day Five

My family has come to Hawaii.

Hawaii, like an aging model, is still gorgeousjust sometimes in a fragile, wasted way.

My parents were here a long time ago; they came on their honeymoon, back in the Old World times. They bought a hotel-and-airfare package to Honolulu. They went scuba diving in the coral reefs and touched real rays and even one dolphin, they said.

Of course thats not an option anymore, but you can snorkel all you like in fiberglass reefs stocked with colorful farmed parrotfish and now and then a robot shark.

I love the parrotfishs bulgy, fat lips.

Lydia Millet

About

Lydia Millet is an American novelist and conservationist. Her third novel, My Happy Life, won the 2003 PEN Center USA Award for fiction, and she has been a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize as well as a Guggenheim fellow. Her newest novel for young readers, The Bodies of the Ancients, comes out in January. The Great Dying is adapted from her YA book Pills and Starships, published by Akashic.

Back then, they ate at restaurants with views of sparkling aqua-blue bays; they went to luaus and drank fancy drinks with paper umbrellas. (We still have those; some of them have my parents names printed on them, from a honeymoon party that was held for them. robert & sara, says the faded writing, hawaii, may 2068.) They took small trips to the other islands, even the one that used to be a leper colony.

These days Honolulu and most of Oahu are seawall and salty aquifers and long, long blocks of abandoned buildings.

But they wanted Hawaii anyway. They were nostalgic. So this time we came to the Big Island, where were staying in a hotel with a view of Mauna Kea. Ive seen pictures of it from way back when, white at the top and majestic. Theres never snow anymore, even at 14,000 feet, but the volcano still looms.

Its just the four of us: my mother and my father, my little brother, and me. Its the four of us here for our last week.

A week is the period the companies usually suggest, once you finalize dates. Any longer and customers can get morbid, or even, if they decide to refuse their pharma, hysterical. And then the whole thing collapses. Any shorter and theres not enough time for good-byes.

My parents arent even that old. My mother had me in her late sixties, and two years later she had Samand though theyre vigorous and healthy on a physical level, on an emotional level theyve decided theyre done.

This would be harder without the training we did at home, without the pharma regimen they have us on. Even with those tools its still intense and vibrant, and everything seems inflected with meaning. Cursed with meaning, almost. Meaning attaches itself to everyday objectstoothbrushes, swimsuits, dangly earrings. Here in the hotel suite, I look at these normal items and everything seems like it portends something.

We just got here and already were on the brink of tears at times, or at least my mother and I are. My father and Sam are trying to act stoic, though now and then I catch one of their hands or a bottom lip trembling.

Meanwhile the edges of objects glow, blur, and fade as I look at them. They all seem permeable or aliveas though the aliveness of objects is there to compensate for my parents being ready to die.

I dont think its the pharma thats doing it, either. Sam and I arent even on a full pill regimen yet. On Day Four well have the option of a powerful tranquilizing blend: Thats Good-Bye Day. They like the contract holders to have their memories intact to say good-bye, because the fifth days pharmathe last pharmacauses forgetfulness. It brings on a long-term memory loss that wipes all memories associated with trauma, so they go out happy.

Happiness comes on Day Five.

Its early afternoon. My parents and my brother have gone out for a walk, and from the balcony of our suite I can see them strolling, their light clothes flapping in the breeze off the ocean, on a trail along the high jagged bluffs.

They carry umbrellas that protect them from the sun but also hide their faces from me. They could be anyone.

The bluffs were well engineered and have been planted to look wild, in a fake way. There are scrubby bushes from the desert, South American cacti and Chinese beach roses (according to the brochure) and even, now and then, dune grasses and sand. They hide the concrete seawall beneath the artificial bluffs so that you dont have to remember where you are or whenso you can almost forget youre not in Old Hawaii. Forget, in other words, that youre living at the tiny tail end of the fire-breathing dragon of our history.

The company my parents chose is a midsize outfit that likes to boast how it hires locals. So our rep, when it came down to it, was a lady my mother had once played golf with.

My mother isnt the golf type at all, by the way. She barely knows how to play, but one time she competed in a small-golf game for charityits mostly small golf these days, unless you have huge money to throw away on travel to one of the big courses, plus water-use finesand because she had a good sense of humor, at least till recently, she was basically the comic relief, I think.

But that one day was when she first met the rep, Jean.

Jean showed up at our apartment a couple of months ago, in the hour before dinnertime when we usually hang out together and talk about our day and stuff. The four of us were drinking cocktails in the living room. Being 15, Sam doesnt drink that much yet, but my mother had offered him a junior can of wheat beer.

And there she was at the doora compact, middle-aged woman from the 10th floor, frosted hair, braided wedge heels. Id seen her in the elevator once or twice.

This is Jean, said my mother softly. Jean, these are our children, Nat and Sam.

My name is Natalie, but I go by Nat.

The woman smiled and sat down and looked at us with a gentle but still oddly businesslike expression.

Your parents thought it might be good to have me here is how she started in.

Sam looked up right away. Hed been reading off his device.

Youre service, he said flatly.

I do work with a service company, said Jean.

She didnt miss a beat and didnt seem awkward; she had a forthright attitude without being domineering.

Youre the counselor, or whatever they call them, said Sam.

Im coordinating the personal aspect of outreach, conceded Jean.

On the contract we purchased recently, put in my mother, soft-voiced. Mine and your fathers.

Sam picked up his beer and drank most of the rest of it, a flush rising on his skin.

I had been sitting at the bay window, looking out over the garden. Our apartment complex was nice, with trees and water features and little striped chipmunks, because chipmunks always poll higher than squirrels.

Anyway, I liked to drink and take in the view.

But then, without really noticing my own movement, I turned so I was facing the room, my back against the view of the trees. In the pit of my stomach was a heavy new stone. At the same time my arms and legs felt light and liquid, like the bones in them had softened.

Why didnt you tell me? was the thing I said.

Were telling you now, sweetheart, said my mother, coming to sit beside me on the ledge. She put one arm around my shoulders. Its all according to schedule. The timing is what they recommend.

They encourage the parents not to get emotive when theyre disclosing. It only makes things worse. So my mother sat there next to me, her arm on my shoulders light, keeping a kind of professional attitude. With her free hand, she shook the cubes in her glass and raised it to drink.

My father stood facing us all with his tumbler of whiskey. His face bore a kind, bemused expression, as it used to when Sam or I would cry and he had no idea how to stop it.

You can still take it back, said Sam, with a kind of hurt urgency. Please, MomDad! Take it back!

Honey, said my mother, we dont want to. Or maybe a better way to say it is that we weve lived for you two ever since the tipping point, sweetheart. Youve been whats kept us going.

The tipping point was when we couldnt do anything more to stop the planets runaway warming. There were feedback loops in the climate system, like the albedo effect and water vapor increase in the atmosphere and plankton die-off in the oceans. So even though wed stopped emitting so much carbon and methane, we couldnt stop the seas or the temperature from rising. At least for a few centuries.

Both of you are practically grown up, said my mother. And when it comes right down to it, you dont really need usnot in the day-to-day sense. You think you do, maybe. But we know deep down that you can take care of yourselves. And you will.

You cant say what were feeling, said Sam, shaking his head. Only what you are.

It helps, for peace of mind, said Jean to Sam, if you keep argumentation for later. During this encounter, this time of disclosure, weve found that what allows for peacefulness is just listening.

Fuck listening! said Sam.

He was bright redlike someone had dealt him two slaps, one on each cheek.

And really, went on Jean calmly, as though he hadnt said anything, theres no rush here. Theres plenty of time. Remember, all contracts are voidable right up until the end. So theres absolutely nothing to make you nervous.

She didnt mention what we all knew: that theres a stiff financial penalty for last-minute cancellations. She didnt need to. My parents knew a couple whod canceled just five hours before their contract was about to start, but at that point it cost like 90 percent of the full price. And they ended up buying a new contract a couple of months later. That meant less money for the survivorsa tainted legacy.

But youre doing so well, begged Sam, turning to my mother.

I felt frozen.

Youre doing really well, youve got your moods well stabilized lately, he added.

No, yeah, son, said my father. Well were not too bad off. Were not personally complaining. We feel so lucky, compared to lots of people. No question. And you knowits not any one big thing. You know? Its not a dramatic situation, theres no particular, exact catalyst here. But we feel like, for one, heywhy not quit while were still ahead? You know, leave while weve got our health. And theres still no impairment. We all saw how Mamie got after she passed 100.

Youll be all right. You have such great resilience, added my mother. Wewe think youre very strong.

Oh please, said Sam.

Try to see it from our point of view, my father said. When we were young, there were still big animals swimming all over the oceans. The rivers and the forests had all this life in them, not just the squirrels and pigeons. You could go anywhere in the worldwe drove a gas-burning car when we were young. We flew on huge airplanes. Whenever we wanted to!

My parents keep thinking, somehow, that one day well hear about how different the world used to be and for the first time well understand them.

But isnt the world always different for the kids than it was for the parents? Sure, maybe its more different now. We get it.

But this is the only world we ever knew.

For Old World people like us, you know, said my mother, weve had as much as we can take of seeing everything go away. And we dont think we can bear towhat happens if, if it keeps going how we think it will.

Of course, we hope and pray it wont, said my father staunchly, tossing back the last of his whiskey. We figure, go early, while everythingswhile theres still hope. You know.

But I knew what he wasnt saying: They couldnt stand to see our future. They couldnt stand to watch us struggle.

Its never an easy decision, put in Jean.

Not helpful, I thought.

But then, the companies put the counselors in the room partly to deflect the family members feelings. Or fears and tears, as they say.

Your mother is so tired, Sam, said my father. He was fiddling with a pile of black and green olives on a tray. The olives were stacked in a pyramid, like in a picture Id once seen of ancient cannonballs. They should have been a tipoff that this was a special occasion, so to speak, because olives arent the kind of food we get every day. We both are, if Im perfectly honest, he added.

We sat there for a while, not knowing what to say.

Eventually Jean suggested we take a walk outside, through the courtyards of the complex. Walks are popular with service companies. Low-cost momentum, I guess, and a natural mood boost.

So we prepared ourselves fresh drinks, mostly in awkward silence, and took them with us into the elevator. We gazed outside as the car descended.

The elevators in our complex are external and made of a shaded glass, so you can see the sky and then the buildings below it, and as you drop, the trees in the courtyard come up to meet you.

Down through the green canopy, down along the tree trunks. Finally we landed facing the rock gardens, the fountains and splashing waterfalls of perfectly reclaimed sewage.

What a nice evening, said my mother, and we looked up dutifully at the fading bands of red and yellow in the western sky.

One thing we do have, in the New World, is beautiful sunsets.

I think what put my parents over the edge was a trip they took a few months ago, a light-rail weekender to the place where my father grew up. It wasnt a coastal town in the strict senseit wasnt right on the beachbut it was on a river delta, maybe 20 miles from where the true coast used to be. When the first storm surges came that couldnt be stopped by seawalls, the town got an influx of coastal refugees. Wave after wave followed, though most of the people didnt stay. Back then they were migrating to places like Ogallala, with fertile land or thick forests. If you look at an old map animation, you can see the masses moving away from the coasts, inward and upward from New York and Florida, from Southern California and the dying cities of the desertLas Vegas and Phoenix, say. The animations look like storms or vast, sky-darkening flocks of birds.

Sometimes, at home, I take a mild mood softener, sit at my screen, and gaze at the animations dreamily. You can customize them to show whatever details you wantthe continent shrinking as the oceans rise plus the massive migrations. I also like to watch the building of the seawalls. You see the swamping of Cape Cod, the swallowing up of the Florida Keys. Islands all over the oceans contract to the size of pinheads, then vanish. You can zoom way out and watch the planet rotate, see the surges of ocean that followed the melting of the ice.

Theres something lovely about it, lovely like Eno or Mozart, thoughespecially without pharmait can be sad.

Anyway, my fathers hometown had been leveled by the waves of refugee camps. Nothing was left of the houses and gardens of his leafy street, the school he walked to holding his younger brothers hand, the swing sets and climbing gyms at the park where he played. All that was gonethe whole town had turned to tent cities and landfills and fields of composting toilets.

My dads baby brother died a while back, a do-it-yourself deal. He hated the service companies. So other than us, my dad has no family left.

For a while after that weekend trip, he and my mother were so quiet that sometimes we forgot they were there.

Before we left for Hawaii, my parents helped Sam and me move to a group facility for survivors who arent old enough to live alone. The two of us will go back there after the trip, to live for a few months till I turn 18.

Then, the morning we left, Sam and I picked them up to catch the boat that brought us here. That was the worst. The apartment where we had lived was bare. Their luggage stood in a neat row against the wall, small cases packed with only bedrolls, some toiletries, and a few clothes. It was a shock to see the sterile whiteness of what used to be home.

Well, said my mother, turning back to cast a glance at the empty living room as we were filing out the front door, good-bye, everything.

Sams coming up the path again toward the hotel building, so close hes almost beneath meI see the circle of his shiny white umbrella. My parents arent with him. I squint: I can still see the two of them, out at the edge of the cliff.

The oceans turning anoxic, scientists say. Its what happened 250 million years ago in the Great Dying, otherwise known as the P-T extinction eventthe biggest mass die-off in Earths history. And now its happening again. The seawaters turned more acid from the carbon its storing, so the ocean food chain has mostly collapsed. Big burps of methane are bubbling out of the water along the continental shelves.

Where there used to be corals and whales and sea lions and seahorses, now theres mostly bacteria and archaea and viruses. The odd school of mutated jellyfish. Plus the garbage vortex and the chemical streams.

But still, Mom and Dad stand at the edge of the bluff, their arms around each others waists, and look out over the faraway waves like anything could be therelike those waves might still be the glittering roof of a marvelous underwater country.

The Fiction Issue

Tales From an Uncertain Future

Read More

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Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/11/14/the-great-dying-happiness-comes-on-day-five/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/11/14/the-great-dying-happiness-comes-on-day-five/