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peeweekey · 21 days

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8:05 | SAM

word count: 3.2k

summary: sam’s ten heart event with a twist.

tags: winter, developing relationships, fluff, swearing, cuddling, hiding from his mother in his bed lol

a/n: this spiralled out of my control and into 3k words… enjoy!

it’s cold.

the fleece coat you’ve bundled yourself in cannot protect goosebumps from forming from the biting chill of the valley’s winter nights. your breaths come out in cloudy puffs of air, the heat slowly draining out of every exhale. it’s dark out, poorly spaced lampposts providing the bare minimum amount of light to navigate.

you got sam’s letter earlier, a clumsily written note that was stuffed haphazardly into your farm’s mailbox—the yellow lined paper he used, all crumpled and ripped.

meet me in front of my house! at 8 pm, i’ll be waiting. there’s something i want to tell you.

the ending sentence is somehow even more sloppily written compared to the ones before it. as if he was debating whether or not to add it in, but ultimately decided for it—it’s funny to imagine him hunched over his desk, stressing over what to write to you.

well, you won’t deny feeling excitement over the possibility of whatever sam has to say. if the subtle skip in your step is anything to go by.

you walk through the silent night of the town, it seems like everything’s frozen in place during the colder times of the year—everyone’s safe at home, toasty under their covers and you’d imagine thoroughly enjoying going to bed at 7 pm.

you do too, sometimes. there’s less to do when the ground is too frozen to plant any crop.

there’s a lot more free time out of the farm during the winter. you’ve really started integrating yourself with the townspeople—helping haley find her bracelet, befriending sam’s prickly coworker shane, and even discovering a shadowperson named Krobus in the town sewers. it really is starting to feel like home.

walking, you cut the corner passing by emily and haley’s house—and there he is.

he looks devastatingly handsome all dressed in winter clothing. his regular denim jacket switched out for a dark woolen coat, his pants are unripped and, surprisingly, not smeared with dirt.

though what you like most about his winter attire is his hair. those wild golden locks are laid flat under a woolen beanie—a stark difference from the spiked updo he usually does (though you like that one too). the tips of his hair are slightly curled upwards, revealing that family trait of curly hair.

you creep closer, just watching him wait for you—the way he folds his arms in an attempt to warm up, and the little shuffle he does on his feet. you laugh softly, he must’ve been waiting a while—just like you have for him.

sam turns at the sound of your laugh, his body unconsciously tilting towards you, like a magnet’s uncontrollable attracting to metal. “you made it,” he breathes, his nose, ears and cheeks pinkened by the cold.

you nod, unable to stop a bashful smile from forming on your lips. “i made it.”

a big grin splits his face, mimicking yours. underneath the lone lamplight he looks jaw-droppingly handsome. you feel yourself become warm just in proximity to him.

“i wanted to talk to you in private,” he says. sam’s buzzing with energy, surveying the dark streets before meeting your gaze with his. “it’s kinda cold out here though… i, um—i can sneak you into my room…”

your heart skips a beat, like you’ve skipped a step on a staircase. “what?” you croak.

your eyes catch onto him wringing his fingers, a nervous habit you can’t help but always notice (not because his hands are nice and interesting to look at, not at all).

“you don’t wanna?”

“no!” you inhale, trying to alleviate the twisting sensation in your gut. “i do wanna, ahem, lead the way.”

sam smiles at you, dimples and all. he leads you towards the tiny bedroom window in front of his house. the window is already open—you assume that’s where he jumped out of to meet you.

he climbs through the window with minimal effort, landing on the flooring with a dull thump!

you raise a brow. “have you done this before?”

sam stretches his hand out to you, waiting. his smile turnt sheepish. “i mean, i think we were all rebellious teenagers once.”

you resist the urge to snort—sam’s nervous, you can tell. he doesn’t have his quips and jokes tonight. and he’s shy, but eager. like a puppy, excited and curious about the world.

“o-kay,” you say, one hand in his hand the other set firmly on the windowsill. “make sure i don’t fall please.”

sam nods, eagerly. the curled ends of his hair shake along with the motion as he does.

how endearing.

you tighten your grip on his hand, hauling yourself through the small window, trying your damn best to not make any sudden noise. which is successful for the most part, only a tiny huff of exertion escapes you.

annoying, yes. but the chill of winter burns through any energy you have faster than other seasons.

your feet connect with the wood of his floor, hand still clasped in his and the chill merely at your back. it’s warm inside, with him.

his room is the same as it’s always been when you’d visit before—shelves, band equipment, posters—but the ambiance is different. a little more charged with tension so thick you could cut through it with a knife.

sam does not bother turning on his light, you don’t mind it all that much. but it takes some effort to avoid tumbling over stray objects that clutter his bedroom floor.

“look, I know I’ve been about nothing but the band for a while now…” he starts. “but I don’t want you to think that’s all i’m interested in.”

you chuckle, clasping your fingers behind your back. “it certainly takes up a big chunk of your interests.”

he pouts, literally pouts. it must be the love bug you caught because you think it’s just plain adorable. “i’m really trying over here!”

“sorry!” you grin, “okay, continue.”

“well, um… shoot, this is kinda hard, huh?” he forces an awkward chuckle. “and nerve-wrecking… but what i’m trying to say is…”

“i’m really happy that we’ve grown this close, and well…” sam looks at you, he’s stupidly red—the color spreading all over his face. “i—i’m just wondering, do you think of me as… just a friend?”

your breath stutters, and you feel yourself blushing before you can do anything to stop it. you stare at him as he does with you. the two of you locking eyes for a second, it feels like it’s just you and him in the world.

you feel your shy admittance at the tip of your tongue. no, you’d say, you’re more than that for me, if you want to be.

sam smiles at you, shy but so, so overwhelmingly bright—it’s blinding. your head is running a mile a minute when you finally get the courage—

“sam!” you hear jodi’s groggy voice from outside the door. your stomach drops with dread. “somebody’s at the door! go and check please?”

you lock eyes once again, this time for entirely different reasons, and with entirely different feelings.

“oh my god, sam,” you whisper hurriedly, panic gripping you. “your mom doesn’t know i’m here—what do we do—”

“hold on—” he replies, with the same sense of urgency as you. “okay, okay—i have a plan, just trust me, ‘kay?”

you think you might break out into a cold sweat. you look at him quizzically, “what?”

sam gives you an apologetic smile with that stupid beautiful face of his, he moves forward, grabbing you by your wrists, and moving you with him—towards his bed.

“sam!” you hiss, alarms are blaring in every corner of your mind as sam all but drags you under the toasty covers of his bed. he lifts the blanket and stations you by the edge, covering you in the blanket—which is now a lumpy mess.

this is his childhood bed you’re in, where his mother and brother are just by the door.

and his mother is calling him.

“i’ll get this over with quick,” he says to you, already heading towards the door of his room. “hang on tight, ‘kay?”

you breathe a sound of agreement, way too jittery to formulate any proper response as you quieten under the covers.

though the sheets do feel nice, and smells overwhelmingly of that specific cologne he uses (stolen from joja inventory, he told you once). you will yourself not to relax and melt into the sheets so fast. instead, you listen for each and every sound that may give hint to whatever the hell is happening.

there’s a commotion that you can hear happening, the door swings open, the hinges creaking along with it—this whole surreal experience feels a little like the confrontation part of a horror movie, the helpless victim hiding and the heavy footfalls of the killer.

though in your case, it’s not one set of footsteps, but two.

“what are you two doing here?”

“you’re the one who called us over, remember?” you can recognize the band’s shut-in pianist’s voice from anywhere. “you were all like, stop skipping practice, seb.”

sam’s voice is oddly pitchy when he responds. “…well, tonight’s no good!”

you hear the other person huff, you strain your ears harder to listen. the huffing person clearly fed up with the strange behavior sam’s putting out right now.

“my mom and vincent are asleep,” he adds hurriedly. “they’d wake up—”

you resist the urge to groan, stifling your mouth under a sweaty palm. jodie was just speaking to him minutes ago, there’s no way they’d buy that. he cannot be a more obvious liar.

thankfully they gloss over the fact. “sam, why are you acting so damn weird?” sebastian asks, straightforward as ever.

“yeah,” the other voice adds. feminine but strong. which you now identify as abigail’s, you hear a pinch of impatience in her voice. “and why are you red? did you sit outside in the snow or something—”

sam chokes, which he tries to conceal as an odd sounding cough. abigail pauses mid-sentence. the shift in the atmosphere is palpable. you screw your eyes shut, hearing the rapid rate of your heartbeat. it’s so loud you’re almost convinced the trio can hear the thumping from your hiding spot under the sheets. this is it, they’re going to discover you.

“oh, oh i see,” abigail grins. “on second thought, i wouldn't risk catching all those germs. i’m feeling starved, let’s hit the saloon, seb.”

the aforementioned man grumbles, seemingly puzzled by the sudden switch in abigail’s attitude. “huh… why?” abigail must have whispered something to him—you can barely hear over the muffle of sam’s blanket comforters. “ugh, alright. fine. you owe us one, sam.”

“oh, of course! mhm, yup,” you cringe at the immense awkwardness of sam’s response, feeling the overwhelming urge to pull out your own hair. “i’ll see you guys tomorrow, yeah? now shoo! wouldn’t wanna get you both sick or somethin’…”

“huh?” sebastian replies, rightfully puzzled as they’re forcefully pushed out of the room. “why would we see you tomorrow if you’re sick—”

“well seb,” abigail says smugly. “let’s just say sammy here is taking care of some important business—”

“okay, bye!” you hear the door click shut. to your utter bewilderment, sam shut the door in their faces.

the room is deathly quiet, the air is stagnant and stuffy. once you feel it safe enough, you crane your neck out of the blankets to check over him. to trace any lingering feeling the sudden visit might’ve given him. sam’s got his back rested against the wood of his door, his back slumped.

“i—i wasn’t expecting that,” you say quietly from your hiding spot on his bed. peeking the top half of your face, watching the door carefully. “kinda nerve-wracking.”

and embarrassing.

“i know—i’m sorry,” he sighs, rubbing his temples. “i didn’t expect them coming over.”

“sebastian said you invited them for practice, though.” you point out.

“maybe i did,” he admits, creeping closer to you on the bed, even if he’s guilty and embarrassed. “i totally forgot—i mean, i was really nervous! my mind blanks when i get nervous…”

sam stops right by the side of the bed, as if he’s waiting for your permission to get in with you—in his own bed. and to be perfectly honest, you really want him to.

“kinda ruined the atmosphere too,” he looks away from you, eyes downcast and melancholy. “i had this whole thing planned too, and i, just… ugh…”

your eyes soften. “sam, it’s really fine. okay, maybe a little shocking but you know it’s not enough to scare me away.”

he looks down at you, worried. his eyebrows are ever so slightly pinched—you wish you could run your fingers over it, and smooth it out yourself.

“plus,” you murmur, reaching over the small amount of space between the two of you to clasp his wrist. “i’m not just gonna leave… just tell me what you were going to say—before the… interruption.”

that gives you the final push to gather your courage to tug him into bed with you. sam follows, flopping onto the empty bedding next to you without a fight. for a moment, it’s just the two of you, side by side, slowly huddling closer and closer for warmth.

and sam is warm. he’s practically radiating comfy heat you wish to burrow into—or wrap yourself around. the perfect bed-partner for winter nights like these.

you find yourself becoming addicted to the feeling.

sam angles his body towards you. you on your back and him on his side, it feels intimate and special. and for some reason, it feels familiar—like you’ve always belonged by his side.

“i think you know already,” he tells you, his eyes are not clear in the dim light but you know, there are practically hearts in them. “that i like you.”

you giggle softly. “and i think you know the same about me.”

sam tentatively grasps your hand, the freezing fingertips thawing under his careful touch. the caress of his hand on yours sends tingling electricity down your spine, your whole body feels alert—alive.

he speaks again, but this time his tone is a whisper of what it usually is. “stay awhile?”

“yeah,” you swallow, squeezing his hand in your grip. a small smile on your lips. “yes, i want to.”

“good,” he smiles, his eyes crinkle at the edges so softly and the dimples on his cheeks deepen. there really is no one else who can compare for you. “hey, you’re really cold… let me warm you up?”

you turn to your side, facing him. at this angle, your faces are mere inches apart. you can trace every dip, line and curve of his face, and he yours. your hand tingles with the overwhelming urge to reach for him and squeeze.

“it is cold,” you agree. “i’d very much like that.”

“phew,” he softly sighs. sam drags his fingers up your arm, stopping at your elbow. wherever he touches, a whisper of him lingers on your skin—a bone deep imprint you yearn for him to spread all across your skin.

you roll into him with little to no effort at all. sam drags you to his chest, your ear perched right above his heart, you can hear the steady thump! of his heartbeat from underneath. sam winds his arms around you, intensifying the heat you feel by tenfold—it’s not uncomfortable at all, though. you like it.

your bodies fit perfectly together, just like puzzle pieces. a mess of limbs tangling together. the warmth of him making you shudder in honey-like delight. it feels syrupy and soft and warm wrapped in his arms.

his hand at your back travels downwards, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake you feel even through the thickness of the fabric separating the skin of your back and his fingertips. his hands feel rough and calloused at the small of your back—from playing guitar and his skateboarding incidents—but you enjoy the feeling.

you trail your fingers under the thick fabric of his jacket and shirt, feeling the smooth skin underneath—the action has no deeper meaning than you wanting to feel.

sam’s uncharacteristically quiet. his breaths are slow and long, like he’s on the verge of sleep. yet his arms are wound tight around you—like he never wants to let go of you. your nerves make you feel like a slow simmering soup. warm and slowly cooking over the fire.

you two stay entangled for a while, in comfortable silence. sometime during the night you’ve matched your breathing to his, and he pulled you somehow even closer to his body.

but, a thump comes from his window, a light tapping sound. soft but persistent. the two of you opt to ignore it, in favor of snuggling closer to each other. yet the taps continue, and become louder and faster.

disrupted by the noise, sam mournfully throws the covers from over him to check, untangling himself from your grip. leaving a very him-shaped indent on the bed left in his wake. you groan, sticking your bottom lip out, you miss the warmth of him already.

“oh shit.”

the expletive makes you sit up in his bed, the comforter draping off your middle. you can make out the shape of him even with the dimness of the light—sam’s back is towards you, and if your eyes dare deceive you, he looks like he’s shrinking into himself a tiny bit.

“what is it?” you whisper-shout to him.

he slowly turns to you, wide eyed, his shoulders stiff. sort of resembling a kicked-dog. sam bows down his head—with what you think is shame, for what reason, you can’t tell. rubbing your eyes of sleep, you furrow your brow, craning your neck to look out the window behind him.

abigail and sebastian are there, waving wildly at you. your eyes widen. abigail and sebastian are waving at you with smug smiles plastered on their faces.

your stomach drops for the umpteenth time that night. you honestly feel too horrified to speak.

you bury yourself under the sheets, a feeble attempt to conceal your mortification. so that’s why abigail was playing along with sam’s urgent ramblings—she knew (not that sam was any good at keeping a cool facade, he is totally incapable of lying smoothly). you groan, you feel like a rebellious teenager again, only the part where you get caught and utterly humiliated.

outside, you can hear the loud roaring laughter of the duo through the glass, alongside the awkward, embarrassed chatter of your newly-minted boyfriend. (not technically official, but the title succeeds to relieve your horror by the tiniest bit)

still, you stay put. through the mortification and embarrassment you still stick yourself to sam’s side, or more literally, on his bed—because you know, there’s no other place you’d rather be.

you spare another glance out of the covers at the trio—to your surprise, sam’s beat you to it. looking at you with heart eyes and the most lovesick expression (you’re pretty sure yours looks the same).

you know there’s going to be a lot more explaining to do in the morning. but it doesn’t matter to you, not right now when you’re in sam’s bed on the verge of sleep.

not when you feel so warm.

a/n: shoutout to the ass trio for making an appearance in the fic! i love you abby and seb.

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martassimsbookcc · 4 months

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Hello guys! First of all happy new year ! Hope you had a great time out there :) 🎆

Today I'm writing this to explain why decimation of Sims 4 meshes is paramount while converting stuff. You know me, I don't like to make statements as english isn't my first language and I find it difficult sometimes to actually write things down - even in italian I struggle sometimes lol. BUT I think this would be useful to all the cc converters and creators out there. So please, take this as an advice, for the sake of our oldie and beloved Sims 3.

Little backstory: I was casually browsing tumblr the other day and stumbled across a beautiful food set converted from Sims 4 - which I immediately saw was high quality. Just for curiosity I downloaded it, checked the polycount of a random object (if you're new here it's the total number of polygons found in a three-dimensional model) and it had way too many polys: 28k vertices - 34k faces + 4096x4096 textures.

Sims 3 is quite an old game now. Every player had experienced lag and glitches at some point so it's very, very important to make the stuff you create/convert from other games suitable for it! Here comes to the rescue a super useful tool in blender called decimation. It basically "allows you to reduce the vertex/face count of a mesh with minimal shape changes", as said on blender website. In just 2 minutes and with not so much effort I was able to reduce those polygons down to 8,4k vertices - 7,4k faces. Do you see any difference? I don't honestly.

Optimization is the key. Converting from sims 4 is not just taking the mesh and textures and putting them all in Sims 3. I wish it was tho!

You're free to put whatever you want in your game but you have to think about the game performance as well. There are people who still play the game and as an ex player I got really upset when I had laggy gaming sessions.

Having said that, here's a tut about blender and the decimation tool, done by @simaddix and which I think covers every important aspect of that useful tool.

If you read this all, thank you! Now I can go back to convert new stuff :D

-Marta

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shakirawastaken · 1 year

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dsmp if..you were a famous singer!

okay i liteally read @/beeindaclouds stuff ALL THE TIME and got inspired so here it is :D

my official comeback (and it isnt a taylor swift song fic!!! whaaaat)

dream: - in love with ur music even if wasnt his vibe - bro would learn to like it LMFAOOO - learns all the words instantly its an instant thing - even before u know the words he knows them - is willing to help you write music cause he has some minimal experience! can give feedback but its not that technical - please collab with him and make him release trust issues - now that he’s face revealed hed BUMP at your concerts - hed tweet about ur music, and his spotify twitter account thing would report hes listening to it but i feel like he wouldnt do more than that publicly - wants you to have your own thing - huge and major fan

george: - more a lowkey fan - obv still supports you hes like that - listens to ur music but not on stream - also tweets about it but its like “go listen to my s/o’s new music:) they worked hard on it” - wants ur effort and talent to be recognized - listens to it and when asked for feedback just goes “it sounds good darling” - hes just like “alr its good like always”

sapnap: - okay he’d either be really similar to george OR hes go HARD - tweeting snapping instagramming streaming whatever social you name hes THERE - “GUYS OMG [ARTIST NAME] RELEASED MORE MUSIC ITS SO GOOD” - would beg george and karl to get you on banter just to talk about your music - and if you write a song about him?? - suddenly his whole world is perfect - “ABOUT ME? OH DOLL THIS IS AMAZING YOUR BEST WORK YET” - buys ur merch even tho ur his s/o - offers his input even if he knows it might not be the best - would dance to it with you - your NUMBER ONE BIGGEST FAN

karl: - he’d be so sweet about it - “this is AMAZING? oh my god you’re amazing??!?” - has it as an intro to his streams - *streaming* “guys that songs is by my s/o btw” - makes mr beast listen to it - tweets about it. alot - posts one (1) picture on his instargam of the both of you in the studio from when u were recording - loves you loves you loves you

quackity: - covers it on stream and makes it cursed - “HAHAHAH no guys but its actually good go listen to it nOW” - keeps up his joker persona but tells you how hes proud of you in private - vERY supportive - will stay up when ur trying to write (cause hes also up doing lawyer shit) - begs u to do a song in spanish - if you know spanish pls make it about him - if not dont ask him for help he will ruin it - if you wrote a song like getaway car or like shutdown or mooo hed DEF listen to it in the car - he loved to listen to ur song while driving it brings him joy - two things he loves together

punz: - listens while playing val LMFAO - would VIBE if u did like indie rap or soemthing - and if it wasnt his vibe? hed still listen cause he wants to support you - maybe not as much as he would have but its fine - cause he likes you a lot - would send you beats randomly be like “lol use this” - “no i dont want too” “babe :((”

wilbur: - POWER . COUPLE - WRITE A SONG WIHT LOVEJOY? WORLD GOES CRAZY - will help you write music. hes good at it too he knows what to do and like what to say - listens to ur music, no matter what it is - wouldnt promotw in much he knows how important it is to build ur own following and + if ur famous u dont need it - u could feature him tbh maybe background vocals or guitar if he was kinda skeptical - or just duet it - its cold outside type beat yk - he loves you and supports you tremendously

LET ME KNOW WHAT ELSE YOU GUYS WANNA SEE :D reqs are open

#dream x reader #dreamwastaken x reader #sapnap x reader #georgenotfound x reader #george x reader #karl x reader #karl jacobs x reader #quackity x reader #punz x reader #wilbur soot x reader #dsmp headcannons #dsmp x reader #mcyt headcannons #mcyt x reader #shakira shakira writes #dsmp if...

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megistusdiary · 1 year

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Vampire kazuha with a shy reader who accidentally released him.

She ended up staying with him because she likes his company

omg i love vampires and kazuha, this is a dream

i deadass wrote a ton of plot for this but then got tired of it so i deleted it all and it's gone now 👎 sorry it's pure smut now

kazuha is veryyy flirty and confident here. idk i always felt like he was one of those poetic mfers who knows how to fuck ok idc idc

warnings: dom vampire!kazuha and sub!fem anatomy/pronouns reader

vampire au, fingering/penetration/oral (sub receiving), obligatory biting (BLOOD), manhandling, overstim lol, clothed dom/unclothed sub

you gasped when you felt the ghost of a breath on your neck, almost feeling the sharp sensation of two canines grazing the skin.

"kazu-" you called out into the darkness, eyes failing to adjust. you reached for the light switch, flicking it up and down to no avail. "kazuha?" you frowned when there was no response.

you felt it again, a touch on your wrist, a current of air across your face, hair ticking your skin as you turned around.

"kazuha, this isn't funny." you whimpered, hearing soft giggles of delight from your partner.

his hand finally came to cup your cheek, allowing you to lean into the cool touch. "i'm sorry, my love. you're just too fun to tease."

your eyes still couldn't adjust, leaving you to fumble and press your hands on his chest to steady yourself. kazuha found this cute, softly cooing to himself about how adorable humans were.

"you're all so feeble, it's shocking how there are still so many of you."

"says the vampire who's living off of me." you scoffed feeling him grip your chin with the faintest bit more pressure.

"says the little human disoriented in the dark who's relying on me to stay upright."

your lips parted to respond, cut off by kazuha running his thumb over your lips. "i have a little game i'd like to try today. won't you indulge me?"

kazuha pulled you into the bedroom, finally allowing you to see somewhat as he already lit a few candles on the windowsills. "what kind of game?"

"oh, if i told you that would ruin all of the fun." kazuha let out a tsk as you frowned. "don't pout. be a good girl and trust me. i know how much you like it when i'm the only thing filling your thoughts."

your face felt hot as kazuha smirked, leaning down to press his fangs gently into your skin. he dragged them up and down, lightly scraping, teasing you as you shivered.

"kazuha..." you sighed, slipping your hands between the soft strands of his hair, feeling his lips trail lower.

he tugged at your rain-soaked clothes, wrinkling his nose. "so messy too." he commented, helping you tug all of the wet clothes off, tossing them into the corner. "much better." he practically purred, leading you over to the bed.

"what about you?" you asked shyly, trying to cover yourself while kazuha was still completely clothed.

"don't worry about that, pretty. doesn't this make it all the more exciting? all on display for me, you look so pretty like this." he complimented you, running his hands up and down your sides as you squirmed.

kazuha gripped your hips firmly, holding you in place with minimal effort. "don't wiggle around so much, princess. come here." he turned you around, leaning you onto his chest as he tucked his chin into the crook of your shoulder.

he let his hand trail down your body, teasing across your thighs as he spread you open. "kazu.." you sighed, leaning back when he danced his fingers across your slit.

"so wet already, how cute." he grinned, gently dipping his fingers between your folds to collect your slick, dragging it back up to rub soft circles around your clit.

your hips jumped from the sudden stimulation, making kazuha wrap his other arm around you in an iron grip, anchoring you to his chest. you started to let out little gasps as kazuha hummed into your neck, taking in all your cute little noises as he eased a finger into you, holding you close to him.

"you feel so good around my fingers, i bet you'll feel as close to heaven as i'll ever get around my cock."

his words caused you to tighten further, eliciting a chuckle from kazuha as he spread your thighs open even more.

"are you going to come soon?" kazuha asked as you nodded, trembling against him. "good, but there are a few rules to my game." he sped up his fingers, crooking them inside you. "you can come as much as you want, sweetheart. but, the rule is we keep going until i come." he grinned, swiping over your clit with his thumb.

"but you- ah, you always come fast-"

kazuha scoffed, shoving his fingers into your g-spot and grinding upwards, feeling you keen in his grasp. "well you seem to be getting off pretty fast from just my fingers."

you couldn't even ask for permission, tightening around his digits and releasing as you shook against his body, slick coating his fingers as his hair tickled your cheek.

you leaned back, feeling out of breath, only to have it further knocked out of you when kazuha began to move his fingers again. "kazu, kazu, what are you- what are you doing?"

"didn't you listen to the rules, sweetheart? last i checked, i haven't come yet. i think i'd like at least another orgasm from you from just my fingers. maybe my tongue as well."

you gasped, feeling him rub your sensitive clit as you clenched your fists into his free-flowing clothes, bunching the material in your hands. "kazuha, please-"

"oh? begging? how odd. you only ever beg when you want more." you tried to protest but kazuha silenced you by rubbing into your g-spot again, feeling your walls spasm around his fingers.

"that's n-not fair, kazuha." you stuttered, hips chasing his fingers beneath his unyielding grip. "archons..." you arched your back as you came again, soaking the skin of his hand again, shaking from the aftermath as kazuha watched your every movement with lust-filled eyes.

you felt kazuha lift you up, letting out a short-lived sigh that turned into a squeak when kazuha maneuvered you to hover over his mouth. "kazu, no! i'm sensitive-!" you cried out, hands finding purchase in his hair, tugging at the scarlet strands.

his grip on your waist was tight, dragging you across his tongue at his own leisurely pace, pressing his tongue into your hole just to hear you call out his name so angelically.

you gasped sharply when kazuha moved to bite your inner thigh gently, drawing beads of blood and licking them up, dragging his tongue back and forth between the blossoming blood from the cut and your clit.

"so good," he mumbled into you, sending vibrations up your spine as you shivered, thighs tensing around his head as he dragged you to ride his face.

your grip went tight in his hair, though you caused him no pain as you rode out yet another orgasm with no warning, kazuha shaking his tongue back and forth across your clit to have you wriggling above him, desperate to escape the stimulation. "kazu, kazuha-" you mumbled as he finally pulled you up, unbuckling his belt to free his weeping dick from its confines. moving your position by himself, he had you hovering over his cock.

you were babbling pleas for him to just fuck you already, whining for him as he let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head. "humans are so interesting." he suddenly commented as he slowly sank you onto his cock, groaning at the tightness as you practically screamed in delight. "no matter what creatures i've met, you are by far the most enchanting."

kazuha tenderly cupped your cheek, making you meet his blood-red eyes. "you...mean that?" you asked, eyes wide as kazuha leaned forward to kiss you deeply, mindful of his fangs as he gently nipped at your lip.

"i've lived many years, met many wonderous people, but none can compare to you, my dear." kazuha leaned forward towards your neck, teasing you by grazing his fangs over the skin. "now, be good for me, and let's finish this game, hm?"

#genshin impact #genshin smut #genshin impact smut #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader smut #halloween smut #vampire smut #vampire kazuha #vampire x reader #kazuha x you #kazuha x reader #genshin kazuha #kazuha smut #✎─𝘥𝘪𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 ❛ ༉‧₊˚#💌─𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘭! ༊*·˚

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crushedsweets · 2 months

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i remember u mentioned brian n tim are barely around now!!! whatre they doin!!! whats the plan!!!

OKAY OKAY OKAY SOOO!!

In the current point of the story, they're mostly just working. both are about 35 yrs old. Their slender symptoms are healing, cuz slendy can only have a SOLID grasp on individuals for about a decade (unless theyre actively destroying themselves like kate and toby)

every now and again, when kate and toby find themselves in deep shit, they'll pop up and help them out. sometimes they have a short O/S episode and find themselves back at the proxy cabin scrambling for pills to soothe the pain, but it is much less frequent. maybe once every 4 months.

tim is especially gone the most, cuz he does trucking and will be gone for two weeks at a time in another state.. he doesn't have any other big aspirations, just wants to make some money, get away, read a book, go fishing. brian works in carpentry, so he's mostly just fucking around town, working and trying to relax. he might pick up an online community college course just to collect credits every, but he could only do one low-commitment, minimal effort class at a time.

they share a two bedroom apartment in town, but again, brian is alone a lot of the time cuz tim's job. they're very strict about not letting toby/kate/the others invade their personal space. nobody but toby knows their address, and thats only cuz toby stalked their asses there LOL..

they're making plans to leave alabama, though. without warning, they wanna get out. this is why they're saving up money and trying to disconnect from everyone before they go. they just don't wanna get away from eachother, cuz that's kinda the only person they got anymore. even if theyre fucked up

#asks #creeped #ahhhfghdgha i missed writing this stuff aw #hcs #tim #brian #masky #hoody #hoodie

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the-kr8tor · 9 months

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What about a little Drabble with a reader that can sing? Nothing professional, just had a little training growing up and only does it for fun. Maybe hobie finds her singing and listens for a bit but as soon as he’s discovered she gets kinda embarrassed about it and stops. Or he’s playing music and she just starts singing along cause singing to a song is easier than by yourself, yknow? One of those two, whichever sounds more fun to you :D

Hi angel! Thank you for requesting! Hope you like it ❤️ there was supposed to be a snippet of lyrics here but I remembered copyright law lol.

Hobie Brown x fem!reader

No specific physical description of the reader.

No warnings just FLUFF 🥰

ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

Grabbing your walkman from the table then clipping it to your sweatpants, you slap the headphones over your ears, while arming yourself with the colorful feather duster–you press play.

The familiar guitar riffs booms loudly through your headphones, you really shouldn't listen to music this loudly; But to hell with it, you need the background music so you could focus on cleaning the flat.

Tapping your socked feet rhythmically on the wooden floor, you shake your hips slightly to the music, harmonizing with the singer, you're home alone, the usual bashfulness when you're singing is nonexistent.

Starting with the surface of the counter, you walk towards it with a pep in your step. You dust the wooden top in rhythm with the drum beats.

You mumble through the beginning of the song, waiting for the chorus, which is your favourite part because of its iconic lyrics.

You sing without a care in the world, while you use the feather duster as your mic. Continuing on dusting away when you don't remember the next lyrics.

Unbeknownst to you, Hobie stops himself mid-greeting once he sees you dance and sing along to the faint music coming from your mustard yellow headphones.

He chuckled to himself when he recognizes the lyrics you're belting out.

You hang around him too much, before you started dating this kind of music wouldn't be your cup of tea. But now? You're the one who's dragging him to every concert.

He watches you from your windowsill, one leg up on the metal hinges, nonchalantly perched on it. Hobie wishes he has a camera on him to record your little concert. Mentally memorizing the scene in front of him would do for now at least.

You try to match the cadence of the singer as you turn around, clutching the duster like a mic.

You screech when you see Hobie's familiar figure, dropping the rainbow duster "Hobie! How long have you been there?!"

Hobie opens his mouth but no sound comes out. Forgetting about your headphones still blaring music, still in shock with embarrassment creeping up your cheeks.

Hobie stands up, motioning for you to take off the headphones.

You take it off your ears leaving it hanging over your neck, still hearing the muffled music through it, you definitely shouldn't have been listening to it this loud, or you would've heard Hobie coming in, saving yourself from embarrassment.

"Been here since the beginning" He smirks at you teasingly.

You cringe, face palming yourself "oh god!"

Hearing Hobie's footsteps you sneak a peek through your fingers. Instead of closing the gap, he shoots a practiced web on your waist. Pulling you towards him in one swift movement, you twirl around, feet sliding effortlessly until you're in his embrace.

You squeak out, grasping his strong arms to stabilize yourself, Hobie has the same idea, he holds the small of your back, lifting the hem of your shirt slighy, his thumb grazing the exposed skin.

"Got you" He gives you his signature smirk, turning your legs into jelly, good thing he's holding onto you.

You're amazed by how he can just take your breath away with minimal effort.

You hide your face in his leather vest, groaning in embarrassment.

"Didn't know there's a concert at your place, where's my ticket, hm?" He eggs you on, playfully shaking your form.

"Stooop" your muffled voice reverberates through the spandex of his suit. Hobie finds you adorable, he likes your singing voice, he'll tell you that later, but Hobie likes teasing you too much.

"Alright, alright I'll stop," Hobie says in between laughs.

You poke your head out from his vest, looking at him through your lashes with a pout.

"When I'm done" he finishes his sentence, grinning. "I didn't know they had a new band member, you got a double life too? Like Hannah Montana?"

"Augh, you're a menace!" You hide your face in his vest again, popping your head out quickly, you look at him suspiciously "wait, you know Hannah Montana?"

"Who?" Hobie feigns ignorance. He leans towards your face, cupping your chin, leading you in.

"You–" before you could get a sentence out, Hobie crashes his lips to yours, silencing any quips.

You can both still hear the music playing through your headphones, the singer chants out the last lyric of how much they can't keep their hands to themselves.

Hobie finds the lyrics appropriate as he kisses you deeply.

ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ

Thanks for reading! Consider reblogging if you enjoyed it ❤️

#request done #hobie brown x reader #spider punk x reader #spider punk #hobie brown #the kr8tor's creations #x reader #atsv fanfiction #spider man across the spider verse #hobie brown x fem!reader #spider punk x fem!reader #atsv fanfic #atsv hobie #atsv x reader #fanfic #hobie brown x you #spider punk x you

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probablyhuntersmom · 1 year

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Therapist Analysis of Hunter's Mental Health in For the Future

Ok, getting down to business and writing this meta at last..(delayed thanks to physical health issues that manifested)..

Throughout most of the ep, leading up to the climactic scenes, we see a new kind of manner in which Hunter is responding to psychological pain, drastically different from what we got used to seeing:

I don't think we've seen him this irritable ever before. There is 99% no recoiling, retreating or shrinking back in his body language except here:

Instead, we see him marching forward, almost like how an animal makes itself look bigger to scare others off, with a singled-minded laser-like focus. But he is in deep anguish.

In addition, he maintains physical distance, unlike his usual self who would want to check on everyone and make a physical effort to feel like he is part of the group. His own mind is more than enough of a rollercoaster to handle in the wake of bereavement, which is why he's keeping the others at arm's length to not be overwhelmed:

(..sorry, I miss the chicken onesie and obviously want to upload 30 pics of him in this post too lol)

The fear of Belos himself, has become more like a fear of feeling the emotional pain caused by Belos, if that makes sense. Stopping Belos is all that matters to him now because his new greatest fear is the pain of bereavement related to losing Flapjack, and that it would be in vain.

It's a crazy massive shift in what he's most afraid of.

He has a strong sense of urgency but it's a world away from how he wanted his thoughts to be as far away from Belos as possible, back in Labyrinth Runners. Instead, Belos is now occupying pretty much every thought he has:

and jfc, I felt so sad seeing this shift: because it reminded me how trauma and its aftermath can take you further away from your real self, in more than one way or direction.

Instead of being numb (a necessity for his mind to protect itself and for him to survive, while he hid from the Emperor's Coven search party back then), it's more a rawness that's present in his emotions in this episode.

Different kinds of pain/fear require different means to be suppressed or numbed out.

He won't allow himself to go to that place of being directly in touch with that raw pain, or else he cannot accomplish the goal of stopping Belos. Anger is after all a secondary emotion, usually protecting emotions like sadness. Clients often choose to come to therapy once they sense they need guidance to go to this painful emotional place, if they can't do it on their own. It's having to remove the band-aid, see what's there (which can be scary and quite unpleasant) and clean out the wound with care.

Hunter needs to maintain this armored state of mind in order to not fall apart (he already did this to a lesser extent when he cried right after Flapjack faded away: that wasn't a long cry, and he didn't even sob), and to subconsciously minimize the chance of going through what's called emotional flooding. He gets close at times to being overwhelmed by flooding, but never gets totally reeled into it, unlike the scenes where he darted out of Eda's house (Hollow Mind) or became trapped and curled up in the first panic attack he had in Labyrinth Runners.

If you notice, him shielding himself psychologically in For the Future like this means he automatically resists moments of emotionally connecting with anyone, subconsciously seeing this as a threat. A very notable example of this can be seen in how he reacts to Clover and Emmi here:

Because emotional connection with any of his loved ones might make him unprepared for a face-off with Belos that could happen literally any second. These quick mental calculations could all be happening in his head subconsciously, while he is reacting and being on edge like this, with a lot of adrenaline putting him in this mode.

However, it's important to note that he isn't completely consumed by this grief response, and his heart was definitely not completely hardened, because other familiar sides of him can be observed e.g. looking out for others:

He makes an effort to be as patient as he can, giving Luz and the others quite a bit of space to lead, though he can't hide the rawness from appearing on his face. It's telling how he has never been an aggressive, pushy personality, and he only veered in that direction in S2A out of fear that he would not please Belos (there was the risk of him literally being cast out and abandoned by his former 'caregiver').

Below is the part of the ep where the tone shifts, after the others call attention to his emotional needs (having love expressed to him, being noticed, etc):

and it's the part of him that we already knew existed, the deepest part that wants someone to reach out and connect with him:

It's a core part that never vanished:

but was just buried down beneath his anguish.

I believe he no longer put up resistance using his emotional armor because he realized deep down that this need to receive love/care was just as important as getting justice for Flapjack, if not more. His support network was going to help him get justice and he had to lean into that and trust in that. He must've realized that both those needs for love and justice are not mutually exclusive.

Anyhow..after Willow, Gus and Luz reach out to him lovingly, while Amity and Camila are also giving him their quiet attention, we can already observe his expression softening. When Willow and Gus leave the room, he runs out of the room after them, calling out their names:

and this easily segways into his heart softening, and the walls beginning to come down in a healthy environment (the trusted good company of his friends):

These were such good signs that not only was he thawing out: he could also begin to hold (and express) multiple emotions at once, instead of letting only one of them (the raw hardened anger) hijack his mental state. He could hold the raw grief, feeling love for Willow and Gus, yet still maintaining the desire to go after Belos which is a mix of fear and anger. His emotions weren't so rigidly all-or-nothing as a result.

I'd like to also note that he likely felt safe enough to express his tears after Willow revealed how she felt about herself. It strongly aligned with his values to minister to her pain: and while he did that, some of his own anguish could be healthily expressed instead of stuffed down in the dark where it would be feared.

Interestingly I find that scene similar to one case I handled whereby my client took a long time to dare to speak about her own pain, which could only happen after we spent a few sessions discussing fictional characters that she resonated with. Other clients do this by preferring metaphors rather than directly referencing themselves, what happened to them, and their pain.

References outside of the client themselves, that have similar enough struggles to the client's own struggles, can provide the safety of detachment and distance for the client to explore their own issues. This detachment is a gap that a therapist should work on closing over time, at a pace that the client is comfy with, until the client feels safe to reference themselves and experience their own darkness without getting overwhelmed.

Basically, Hunter connecting with Willow's pain could've been what allowed him to feel the scary emotions that he'd been avoiding in all the scenes prior to Willow showing him the photo of him and Flapjack. Feeling any form of love would also mean feeling grief he was carrying.

Sometimes in trauma, our emotions and cognitions flip like a switch quickly in a black-and-white sort of fashion, which may be useful if things are life-or-death, but may cause issues once any real dangers have passed (though if S3 hadn't been shortened, I wonder how differently this part of his arc would've played out).

What's interesting is we never quite see any contending or an active struggle between 1. the part of him that wants (and rightfully needs) to receive love/care, and 2. the angry part of him that wants justice, that wants to track down Belos so badly after the loss of Flapjack. It's more like one eased into the other, and I believe both parts can coexist, and it's a balance that he should be able to strike while remaining stable in the next episode. Balance like that is an indication of improved mental health: being able to hold multiple emotions in your mind at once and remaining relatively calm, instead of one or maybe two difficult and unpleasant emotions hijacking everything.

It makes sense that the group gave him his space throughout most of the ep, instinctively sensing that they should be nearby in case he asked for support, but not being too close because he would be in more undesired and unnecessary pain. E.g. if Camila had asked him what he asked Willow ("Willow, hold on. How are you feeling?"), early on in the ep, he probably would've brushed it off by minimizing his pain with a "I'm fine", to politely decline anything she'd do to extend support and care. Maybe he wouldn't have been ready. Only once he saw Willow in a lot of her own anguish did he feel ready to truly connect.

It's a big contrast..how afraid he was back then about the others finding out he's a grimwalker:

versus his response when Gus brings it up at last.

Hunter is so tired by this point, too preoccupied with the major life change he's experiencing, that he doesn't even look fazed. It helped that Willow had just told him "you're one of us now".

Plus I strongly believe there was already underlying healing that made him capable to handling the grimwalker reveal and any ambush by Belos. One indication is this body language comparison here:

where the 2nd one shows that he still leans forward, instead of pulling back like in the first one.

By the end of For the Future, more emotional balance has been restored in him, and it began when Willow took the risk to show him the old flyer derby photo and use it as a conversation starter.

That's a wrap for today's episode of Holy Titan I Love This Kid So Much That I Might Die.

#toh hunter #the owl house #toh analysis #for the future #emperor belos #loz writes a meta #long post #for the future analysis

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theerurishipper · 4 months

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Hi~ Hope you have a lovely day. I want to get your opinions on my rant lol and ask.

Marinette is such a disappointment of a lead female character in a western magical girl cartoon. She isn't a good leader and all her team consist of yes men and women and sidekick Chat Noir where her real partner Alya is standing over to the side. I liked her in the first two season and maybe some in s3 but the s4 and onward just got to me ngl. It's her world and we're all just living in it. Miraculous is so weird when it comes to team dynamics because I get she's guardian but I really wished it were someone else and not her because she chooses people she already get along great with. It fun for team dynamics to add be different and broader.

The whole she's just 14 the fandom spouts only goes so far how many messes do you do until you realise you need to own up to them even at that age when you should know better on your conduct ?

I get it hard to communicate but onwards I always thought the bigger of the two in the conflict was her because of her secrecy and her controlling tendencies. I disliked it so much in the ephemeral episode and her betraying her partner disgusted me. Sorry to those who like or defend her character this much but I can't stan or like a character that does this much crap to a friend let alone a love interest and then gloss over or minimize it and not be called out for it. Like, are people standards that low they think she's a good leader or a good proper representation on feminism when this show reeks of misogyny and misandry. She's the ultimatum voice for Astruc.

A communication issue with her Chat was fine a long time ago but now in s5 she crossed it hell nah how do people still support a ship with her knowing she followed Hawkmoth command for Adrien. I literally can't anymore with this show. Every guy she likes gotta be so 100 percent in effort and like in the Shadybug special him always comforting her makes me so jaded whenever she cries what about a change in dynamics had we ever seen her comfort him in turn how are people invested in this ship? Like that time in the bench and she just thought of ways to woo or give presents instead of just comforting him is so sad to watch.

She really followed in Master Fu steps. The bar is in hell and she crossed it in the finale. There is no excuse no handwaving it away and i know in my heart they gonna minimize it for Adrien own good. Everything is for his own good huh? What good is it rooting for a ship that just reeks of pity points. Like, she was never my favorite but who knew 8 years ago she'd pull a stunt like this and people bending over and doing mental gymnastics to rationalise this insanity. She really is a good foil to Gabriel ironically to bad she has no sway in this family drama we call the Agreste.

I know she has good intentions and it's not wrong for her to wish to save her prince but like thats all that is intention. Her actions are also important and the effects she's done is so bad that if she weren't the Main character and we haven't spent the chunk of the majority in her pov alone she'd be disliked.

I feel like compared to other respective series Winx Club s1-3 Bloom, Danny Phantom, Ben 10, Totally Spies they have it much more harder and so many more all show the consequences of your actions and how you do them right and they're her age. I feel like whenever someone bring up consequences it's like people in this particular fandom think we do it to punish Marinette but no I just never ever saw it properly done in this show because she's very coddled in the narrative. I don't see other MC as coddled as her before in a show where when they MESS UP it's actually integral and important.

Rant over.

You encapsulated all my thoughts perfectly, anon. I've said so many times before that I loved Marinette from Season 1-3 and even during Season 4 as it aired. What made me fall out of love with her character post Season 4 was the utter lack of acknowledgement of her actions and the insistence in portraying her as in the right at all times. Like you said, it's not just your intentions that matter. Your actions and the effects that they have on the people around you also matter. The writers don't seem to understand this, and it hits Marinette's character worst of all. She had so much potential to be such a great character, which is why I feel so sad seeing just how badly the writing failed her. Marinette deserved better.

Thank you for your ask!

#MLB #ML Salt #ML Writing Salt #ML Writers Salt #Marinette Salt #Meta #Asks

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3000s · 4 days

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something i realized earlier this morning is that it is fucked up how i want to get by with not studying on the off chance that i'll be fine with minimal effort, i should be preparing for things instead of just hoping i'll be fine lol, i am just so tired all the time though i got home from work last night hyping myself up to study all night for this practical and like 10 mins in i was falling asleep

#txt

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snickerdoodlles · 2 months

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finally posting some background notes for red line fic under the cut !! i meant to do this [checks wrist] an embarrassingly long time ago, except i get shy talking about my writing hjgfjhfj. so!! reading thru red line here and dumping out some thoughts as we go!! for @the-cookie-of-doom <333

red line started with this post. (me, every time i say i'm not going to write something: *grabs clown nose*) i wanted a fic where Chay watched Kim fight because 1) Chay deserves this, ep14 bar fight my BELOVED, but also 2) Kim's put a lot of effort into sectioning parts of his life off from each other, so it's SUPER FUN from a writing perspective to throw them all together and watch him flounder.

planning out red line, it was either going to be Kim pov if it was pre-mafia reveal, or Chay pov post-reveal. both of which are really fun!! but i wound up going for a pre-reveal scenario mostly because this was supposed to be sHORT and a Chay pov didn't feel right without a reconciliation or a lot of setup otherwise. so Kim pov it was! then it was a little bit of rolling ideas around for why goons would be present period. i landed on Arthee's fuck-ups causing problems before Chay's first kidnapping mostly because i didn't want too many guns involved (there was just. no way Kim could've easily protected Chay in that without sending him away for real, which defeats the purpose) but i wound up really loving that premise and committing for a few other reasons:

Kim never brought any of the mafia into Chay's life in canon. all of the mafia bullshit Chay gets dragged thru is related to his own family being involved in the mafia (none of which Chay knows about!), which is very crunchy to me.

loan sharks breaking down Chay's door was his normal. like. i feel like this goes largely ignored by a lot of fandom, but Chay's normal is gang thugs destroying his stuff and him needing to patch up his loved ones. the fucking things that does to a kid.

i just really like Arthee as a plot device. he kinda got left off to the side by canon (which!! fair!! they were juggling a lot of balls there and i'm glad they dropped him in favor of other characters/plots), but you can also see how much i loved the "Chay gets kidnapped because of Arthee's debts" kimchay premises from the early fic days in here XD

writing Kim and Chay in a Tutoring Session, No Really, It Looks Like A Date But This Is Tutoring Honest date was ridiculously fun. i love putting boys in situations. but i also just??? really like them being friends??? well, flirty friends here, but it's so important to me how much Kim and Chay just like spending time together. they're two very lonely boys and i'm very happy they found each other <333

also, Kim telling himself he's not flirting while flirting and encouraging Chay to flirt with him. disaster boy <33333

i spent probably a silly amount of time thinking about what weapons to give Kim (originally, i wasn't going to give him any). i didn't want it to be knives because while that's very hot of him, knife fights are…very, very rough. far more like that one mission impossible movie than elliot from leverage or literally any other movie knife fight, and while patching up knife fight wounds is excellent, i already have that for a different WIP. i also just don't see Kim carrying outright weapons in with his university gear? maybe his first year, but not at the end of it, too much risk for things to go badly. hence, mace and brass knuckles-- the mace is one of those little keychain mace things you can buy in a pack (Kim's was a gift from a friend nearly a year prior, he was very startled and very confused by the offering lol). he got brass knuckles because i think Kim is all for something that helps minimize how hard/often he has to punch someone, but mainly because when i was looking at the keychain mace, i remembered those stupid 3D-printed keychain brass knuckles things also existed and amused myself thinking about how much they'd offend Kim. thanks to that thought train, Kim got a proper set to better break a dude's nose <3

Chay and Kim trying to shove the other behind them as the loan shark's thugs break down Chay's door still makes me laugh. i'm easy to please like that, i love that meme y'all.

Kim's running commentary on how stupid Gold Jim is was SO MUCH FUN to write. i like that Kim's irritation making Gold Jim comical didn't take away from how threatening the situation was either? like, obviously, it was less intense, that was the point, but i'm still really happy with how serious Kim feels through all of this because there is danger in the fact the idiots are looking for a fight, even if they haven't realized how outclassed they are yet.

also, i just really like the level of Kim's violence in his head. i like that it's just a stream of conscious he's not putting a lot of thought into. i just don't see Kim's relationship with violence as being a dramatic thing-- it's just that Kim's first thought any time he sees someone is how to break them, just incase.

Kim naming the thugs One thru Five was 100% for my writing convenience, i am SO delighted people loved that for him XD

Chay hitting a thug with the frying pan for interrupting his date was the first thing i knew would happen in this fic. Chay deserved to hit at least one(1) person with a frying pan in canon, so he got to do it twice here. Kim is DESPERATELY trying not to swoon, he's going to be so horny about this after the shock of everything wears off.

man, i cried a lot thru writing the action for this scene, but i'm really satisfied with how it came out actually!! WORTH IT

i am still ridiculously tickled by this particular "Oh" / Oh moment. KimChay making hearteyes at each other while the goons feel superfluous my beloved <333

Kim making a hot grunt sound while manhandling a guy twice his size into position for Chay to whack with his pan is going to fuel conservatively 83% of Chay's spank bank fantasies from here on btws.

writing Kim tell Gold Jim who he is was so much fun.

in that line of thought, if Kinn ever learned Kim threatened some thug with his name, he'd beam like a puppy. doubly-so if he realized the specific wording Kim used. his metaphorical tail would be wagging up a hurricane if he ever realized how much Kim associates him with safety and protection.

also very fun to me was Kim accidentally calling Chay his boyfriend and immediately swallowing his tongue about it. i didn't plan that, it just fell out of my brain like it did Kim's mouth and i went "okay!! we'll roll with this!!!"

"is the safety on" was Chay holding himself back by the barest skin of his teeth. he is going to get his mouth on Kim asap but he is NOT going to let some stupid emergency room trip ruin their first kiss. meanwhile, Kim's about to enter an angst spiral, lmao. (in my head, there's a dent in the floorboards from where Chay threw his frying pan away. it's amazing it didn't shock them out of their kiss, but Chay is not to be deterred dammit!!)

u all know me and how much i love my kiss fic, but ending this one with Chay having an adrenaline crash was delightful to write, i'm gonna need to do this more often XD Chay's 100% of the mindset he's either going to be horny or cry, and he'd much prefer to be kissed, tyvm!! unfortunately for him, i prefer tears. also, Kim keeps trying to use his mouth for pesky things like words, it is very unproductive towards Chay's current goal >:T

speaking of Chay's wild emotions-- i very much do not see Chay liking violence for violence's sake. he's had enough of people throwing their weight around him for a lifetime. he does, however, have the biggest thing for a hot boy coming to protect him, esp if the boy is Wik shaped. don't tell me Wik was part of Chay's gay revelation and tell me he DIDN'T have so many fantasies of Wik protecting him from the shitty loan sharks.

that said tho! reality =/= fantasy. Chay was terrified Kim was going to get hurt because of him, half his adrenaline crash was just worry for Kim :(

i'm not sure what to say about this next bit transitioning to the ending of this fic except that it was definitely the trickiest and the longest to write. Chay's drilling Kim for answers because Porsche has been absent for months, but Chay's not upset with Kim. (Kim's the one here with him! he's the one answering Chay's questions!) i wrote myself into a corner a few times with dialogue that was too accusatory for what i wanted. but also, this was the part when i was like "oh!! i know what the summary should be!!" because six thugs have nothing on the intimidation factor of Chay Has Questions XD

Kim saying he can go and Chay going "why tho????" made me laugh out loud writing this. i love Chay's terrible priorities so much. you will never be able to convince me that Chay wasn't 100% ready to accept Kim as part of the mafia so long as Kim cared about him, this boy is so ride-or-die for his whole two(2) important people. Kim trying to convince mr. obstinate he doesn't want him is even more futile than Kim trying to deny himself what he wants. esp as Chay calls Kim out for all his flirting <3

on a more serious note tho, i really like how Chay comes across during this part of the story. it's kinda like Kim's violence thing-- i see the core of Chay being very, very lonely. he really only has his brother in the world, who's not able to be home too much due to circumstance, and now isn't home at all. and then here comes Kim, reaching out to Chay and asking all about him and just plain being a friend to him-- of course Chay latched on. of course he's going to cling if he thinks Kim likes him back. he's too lonely not to.

Kim's little whispered "stay" was my driving force every time i got stuck on this fic, i love when Kim tries to tell himself all the reasons he's not allowed to want something and then ask for it anyways. that's what we in the business call character growth XD

to wrap up this very messy fic ramble, some lines i really, really love in this fic:

Kim's never wished for a gun before. Kim doesn’t like guns. They’re too fast. Too clean.

hehehe

Gold Jim chuckles menacingly. It’s like he’s following a theatre script. Kim’s going to break every bone in his body before he sets him on fire and applauds.

i'm not sure if anyone noticed??? but the specific items of torture are based on theatre/performance idioms-- "break a leg" and "you're on fire"-- hence Kim applauding at the end.

Kim reminding himself not to scare Chay by killing the idiots, light maiming ONLY

cleaning up blood is so annoying, anyone with a period can concur 😭

Chay stands over Three, wielding a frying pan with two hands and looking just as surprised with himself as the rest of them.

i'm just. so, so fond for the image of Chay staring with complete surprise between his frying pan and a guy he just gave a concussion. he just did that! he just did that???

“How’s that going for you?” Chay asks, warm and soft where he’s still pressed up against Kim, “Felt a lot like tutoring to me.”

listen. LISTEN. Kim's investiagation excuses to hang out with a cute boy he likes are so cute. Chay agrees with me. we are both so correct for this. Chay's going to tease Kim so much about this but also encourage it past this point, he loves Kim being obsessed with him too <3

#fic: red line #i'd clean this up except im feeling v sick rn hgjfj #so!! messy thought rambles it is!!#hope u like friend <33333 #kinnporsche #kimchay

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