Hard to believe it's been about 2 1/2 years now since I had the Brostrom ligament repair surgery on my left ankle. Time flies. We were in the thick of Covid then. I tried using a scooter for the first week when I was out and about. I stopped using it and went back to crutches because it was too heavy, and lifting anything (in and out of the car) when you're basically one-legged is dangerous. Crutches are always the best. Notice my cast was getting dirty very fast. These were both from the first week or so of recovery. June/July 2021.
Ghost gifts a single tiny ear loop to Soap one day. Says he noticed Soap had pierced ears. That rings keep from handling a gun or a knife properly. He doesn't make eye contact, tries to hide his face, even as he's already wearing his balaclava.
Soap blinks. Ghost has already given him gifts and only behaved that way for the very first one. He doesn't understand. The earring is very simple, but seems to be made of expensive material and not only covered with a thin leaf of gold.
"Didnae it come with another one?" he says, jokingly.
But Ghost flushes, turns his head, and lifts his mask, only enough for Soap to see the glinting of the other earring on his ear. Suddenly he understands that it's not simply a gift. Ghost favoured practicality, but he wanted to give him a ring.
He grabs his hand as it falls back down.
"Simon, what is this?" he asks softly, not daring to be hopeful just yet.
With his other hand, he reaches out to gently turn Simon's head back towards him. His cheeks and his nose are flushed, it makes the warmth of his dark eyes, generally hidden behind a sneer or a bored expression, undeniable.
He looks nervous. Johnny's heart is beating faster. Could it really be...?
"I know", Simon starts then pauses, uncertain. "I know I'm probably not what you thought you'd have, when you were younger" Soap wants to interrupt, to scoff, to protest that Simon is way better than anyone he could have hoped for, but doesn't. He never wants to cut off his love when he's barely starting to open up.
"I know that I'm not easy to be with some days, that I'm not friendly and easy going like you, like someone you'd deserved to be with." he continues, unconsciously pushing his face more into Soap's hand. "But... I love you, more than I thought I could, and I'd like... I'd like to be with you, for as long as you'd have me..."
Johnny's heart is soaring. He has no idea how to react. He'd have to get all the giddiness out first, and the moment doesn't seem appropriate for jumping around and squealing.
"Officially," Simon continues, voice quieter, out of breath. "If you want to."
A gigantic grin splits Johnny's face. All of his limbs are buzzing, he needs to stand up, to run, to explode something. But he's terrified to spook Simon so instead he just squeezes the hand he's holding rhythmically and moves his feet back and forth.
"Baby, are ye asking me tae marry ye?" Johnny says. He's pretty sure his voice is wobbly, but can't really hear it himself as the blood in his ears is louder than the rest.
Simon's eyes do something, what is visible of his face looks like he has an expression on but Johnny can't analyze it now, doesn't dare to see the hope in his eyes, the pleading in his brows.
"I... Yes, I guess I am," the love of his life says finally. "If you want to. You don't have to."
Soap can't keep himself in check any longer. He's making a high pitched noise, jumping up and down where he's seating on the bed, and throws himself at Simon.
"Of course ah fooking want tae!!!"
Simon lets out an excited giggle, swept in Johnny's mood, and tightens his arms around his lover. No, his fiancé.
This is the best day of his life. He just has to deal with this mission tomorrow, and then they can start to plan everything.
Who is the sanest/most normal TF2 merc but only the worst choices
I've seen this poll twice already, once on tumblr where all the mercs were listed (with Engineer winning), & once on Youtube with only Engie, Heavy, Spy, & Sniper (Heavy was winning).
So, I thought I'd come up with my own version of this post, because I was wondering who the TF2 fandom considered the most sane out of the least sane guys of the bunch. So...
i have an idea for a character design but what animals are usually associated with medicine??? the most common answer i got was snake, but i also thought of lab rats/mice, rabbits etc
Cave-in: A comic starring Darkrai, Dusknoir, and an unconscious Twig on an expedition gone wrong.
(Note that this takes place after the ending of the fanfic, and people have settled into having Darkrai in their lives... for the most part. Dusknoir still hates his guts and doesn't trust him whatsoever.)
my twitter reach is dead because of my shadowban sentence so you get to be the first to answer the one question that has been driving me insane since the dawn of time:
lots of talk about why Mike reacted so negatively to this when he reacted so positively to this:
can we talk about how the Rinkomania reaction started in between those two things? right here:
at mid-season-2, all the times Mike has seen El use force against people have been super justified because there were lives at stake (or at very least, like in the case of tossing Lucas in the junkyard, she thought there were)
then Max wipes out, and goes "ooh it was like a magnet pulled on my board" and instead of taking that the way anyone would - that this annoying girl fell due to lack of skill and is trying to save face with a stupid excuse - INSTANTLY Mike suspects El. El, who's currently dead or lost in another dimension or whatever, must actually be lurking around here with nothing better to do than trip Max.
ok 100% accurate but I'm offended nonetheless
why did he jump to that conclusion?
the last time some inexplicable, physical but nonlethal hijinks befell someone he was talking to, he turned around and saw who was responsible:
so when Max fell, in that same gym btw, of course his brain goes turn around, look at what you seee
this was Mike learning that, oh, El isn't Superman and doesn't reserve her powers only for perfectly morally justified situations, but can in fact lash out about anything that bothers her, like the disturbed child she is.
BUT I don't think he actually processed that at that moment. he wasn't thinking about how Max did absolutely nothing that could be misinterpreted as a threat, and didn't deserve this. at that moment, any thought of justice for Max, or scrutiny of El's motives, was easily and completely drowned out by excitement that El might be there.
so later Mike sees Angela screaming on the ground with El standing over her, and remembers he has already seen El respond to a non-life-threatening situation with a level of force that didn't make sense to him.
plus he has that whole protection thing and I think seeing anyone get hurt is paladin catnip to him (see him rushing to Max's aid two seconds after telling her she's annoying). he has that instinct to support whoever's been knocked down undeservedly - yeah he knows Angela is an asshole, but El's response seems overboard to him, so while he doesn't go as far as rushing to Angela's side, he doesn't rush to El's side either.
he keeps distance between himself and El at the rink and leaves her sitting alone in the most literal demonstration of not wanting to take her side. he seems irritated in the car and downright pissed at the dinner table. I think it's true that he was overwhelmed in the moment and scared not of El but of the situation, but I don't think that's all of it, because then why would he be pissed.
maybe he's seeing patterns and thinking back on how Max didn't deserve that at all, and how neither of these things were very Superman of El and he's a bit disillusioned that she doesn't live up to the flawless superhero moral code he assigns her in his mind.
while the Angela thing seems WAY harsher than the Max thing, can I also say that a lot of that is due to circumstances?
Angela's pouring blood, wailing, an ambulance has to come, there's lots of witnesses. it looks baaaad. Max isn't injured, isn't too bothered, and there are no witnesses or real consequences. shrug. but it easily could've gone down much more like Angela. you can absolutely break a bone or get a concussion from a spill like Max's.
Max isn't hurt, so Mike just leaves the room, and nothing ever comes of it. compare to Mike watching an inevitably-to-be-arrested El sit stewing in the aftermath as dozens of Angela's sympathizers watch her get checked for brain damage by EMTs.
it's little wonder Mike has such a different reaction in the moment, even though El's actions in these two scenes actually isn't totally night and day.
El's force was more deliberately focused on Angela, and I think El did intend to hurt Angela in a way she didn't intend to hurt Max (El yoinked the skateboard rather than bodily targeting Max herself, but her intent was still to make Max fall, and she could have been comparably injured as a result).
like, up til the point of "El gets mad and lashes out" these are similar - the way the aftermath unfolds just happens to take the best and worst possible paths, respectively.
and before you want to point out that the Angela thing was a reaction of anger and the Max was just about puppy love jealousy, no, that was anger. Max is literally the first thing El thinks of when Kali says to think of something that angers her.
tldr; rinkomania is just a nightmare remix of the gym scene to Mike
I hope you had a happy 2023 summer! Hard to believe 2023 has sped by so quickly.
This shot was taken in June, 2015. I had just returned from Mexico (traveled there and back with a sprained ankle), and am engaging in a most unusual activity here. This Original New York Seltzer had just make its second debut into the grocery stores after 20 year absence. This was my favorite soda as a kid. The root beer flavor was my favorite. I opened the cap and tasted it again for the first time since 1994 when it disappeared!!
There are these obvious parallels between Wednesday and Enid on the one hand and Morticia and Weems on the other hand in terms of being roommates in Ophelia Hall, being captain and co-pilot at the Poe Cup, their general aesthetics (Morticia + Wednesday = dark hair, dark clothes, dark everything / Weems + Enid = blonde hair, bright clothes) etc.
I think these parallels are also emphasized by scenery:
so at first you would think: there is supposed to be a parallel between Wednesday and Morticia and then Enid could be compared to Weems in some ways
BUT if you think about it and analyze the characters more deeply you could say that in some ways Wednesday has more in common with Weems than with Morticia, whereas Enid has more in common with Morticia than with Weems.
Here are some things I noticed while thinking about this:
#1 their roles at the Poe Cup
This is what initially made me think more closely about the parallels between the four of them: Weems tells Wednesday that the last time Ophelia Hall won the Poe Cup, Morticia Addams captained the team - just like Enid captains the team now. Weems was Morticia’s co-pilot - just like Wednesday is Enid’s co-pilot. This made me wonder: Why didn’t they make the parallels between Wednesday and Morticia more obvious by just having Wednesday be the captain and Enid the co-pilot? The reason for Wednesday being the co-pilot is Yoko not being able to participate in the Poe Cup but instead of making Yoko the original captain and Enid the co-pilot, having Yoko be unable to participate and then making Wednesday the captain and Enid the co-pilot, the writers decided to have it the other way around. Enid now has the position that Morticia used to have and Wednesday has the position that Weems used to have. Which doesn’t put Wednesday in her mother’s position - but in Weems’s position. And Enid in Morticia’s position.
#2 their character traits
Like Wednesday Morticia has a dark aesthetic and is drawn to dark and morbid things. There are obvious parallels. But if you look at their personalities more closely you see a lot of differences. While Wednesday never expresses emotions, doesn’t show any interest in romance and is very aloof in general, Morticia is very likable, very passionate and romantic (in her own unique dark and morbid way of course) and also sentimental and kind of soft. Wednesday doesn’t care about others at all and is a loner whereas Morticia’s love for her husband is unmatched and her family is very important to her. Enid, though not matching the Addams’ aesthetic at all, seems to have more in common with Morticia personality-wise than Wednesday has in common with her mother. Enid is engaging and passionate, enthusiastic and has a high interest in romance. She is also likable and dedicated and emotional, in a way like Morticia. I have always thought, even before Tim Burton’s “Wednesday”, that Morticia Addams could in some ways be described as having a “bright” personality as opposed to her dark appearance. She draws others in, she’s devoted and dedicated, happy and positive. Enid is like that too while Wednesday is completely different. Morticia herself talks about Wednesday’s and her opposing dispositions when talking to Wednesday about her psychic abilities - Morticia's disposition being positive (which causes her visions to be more positive and which makes her a Dove) while Wednesday’s disposition being darker on the other hand (which causes her visions to be more potent and powerful and which makes her a Raven). I think it is very obvious that Enid’s disposition is positive too, just like Morticia’s.
And then there’s Weems. Obviously, Weems and Wednesday don’t have the exact same personality. On the outside, Weems is always nice and friendly, she’s polite and civil. But there is also a different side to her. She doesn’t show it to others but she does have a rather dark and angry side that she is hiding. She is very bitter about her past and seems to hold on to a lot of jealousy towards Morticia. She can also get very angry and harsh. And she is serious, unlike Morticia, who is soft and angelic. Because of her bitterness and her seriousness and the fact that she hides these negative feelings from others (when she confesses to Thornhill that her own Rave’N was only disappointing she then quickly changes the topic and doesn’t want the conversation to get more personal) and especially the throwing-a-yearbook-page-into-the-fire-scene with that evil and hateful expression on her face, I would describe her disposition as rather dark as well. Weems is nice and a good person but she is not light-hearted and carefree, there is a certain severeness to her. Therefore a dark disposition - just like Wednesday. And when you think about it, she is a loner, too. She is surrounded by people but no one is even remotely close to her - just like Wednesday.
#3 their lives at Nevermore
Enid is very passionate about Nevermore and the whole school spirit thing, participates in a lot of school activities, is captain of the Ophelia Hall team at the Poe Cup etc. Morticia was like that too. She was captain of the fencing team, Queen of the Dark Prom and President of the Séance Society (what a legend) and Wednesday says that Nevermore “was the perfect school” for her mother. Just like Nevermore is the perfect school for Enid! Both Enid and Morticia are popular and successful and show a high level of identification with the school.
By the end of the first season Wednesday seems to enjoy being at Nevermore. But she did NOT (and I like that fact and love that the writers did it that way) and will probably never follow her mother’s footsteps. Wednesday has no interest in networking and being popular and taking part in group activities. And while it is nice that she found people she cares about (mostly Enid and Eugene), she will not be like her captain-and-queen-and-president-of-everything mother and prefers to be an outsider, even at a school for outsiders.
I think it is very likely that Weems was an outsider when she was a student at Nevermore too, just like Wednesday. We know that she was always jealous of Morticia because Morticia was popular. When Morticia says that they had good times at Nevermore, Weems basically says “speak for yourself”, implying that her time at Nevermore wasn’t that great, and at the Rave’N she tells Thornhill that all she remembers about her own Rave’N is “disappointment”. The negative feelings she has about her time as a student at Nevermore go as far as to RIP OUT a page of her old yearbook and dramatically throw it into the fire. So like Wednesday she probably didn’t take part in many school acitivities that she was excited about, she wasn’t very popular and maybe even an outsider. I think this is a parallel between Wednesday and Weems - though, of course, Wednesday WANTS it that way while Weems was and still is bitter about it...
#4 Wednesday and Weems being in Morticia’s shadow
There is this huge parallel between Wednesday and Weems about being in Morticia’s shadow and trying to find their own path without Morticia’s ‘legacy’ overshadowing their every move. Wednesday says multiple times that she has no interest in following in Morticia’s footsteps because she couldn’t live up to the expectations based on her mother's legacy anyway. Just like Weems could never compete with Morticia. I especially noticed one scene where Wednesday expresses very strongly that she doesn’t want to be compared to her mother all the time and that she has the need to be her own person. In this scene Weems compares Wednesday to Morticia and when Wednesday tells her that she and her mother are two different people, Weems seems to think about Wednesday’s words for a moment. I don’t know whether I interpret too much into this but I think that Weems’s face shows that she realizes that she is very familiar with the need to be “independent” from Morticia Addams. She knows very well how it is to be in Morticia’s shadow and I think it is in that moment that she realizes that Wednesday feels the same way about Morticia as she does. It was not easy for Weems and it is not easy for Wednesday to be “linked” to Morticia’s legacy at Nevermore because she was perfect - she was popular, well-liked, happy, successful, dedicated and beautiful. So in a way, Wednesday’s experience at Nevermore is similar to Weems’s experience: always being in Morticia’s shadow. And I think that’s what Weems realizes:
Also, Wednesday tells her mother: “I’m not you, mother. I will never fall in love or be a housewife or have a family.” So... she’ll be like Weems then? She’ll choose a whole different path than her mother just like Weems chose a whole different path than Morticia did.
To sum it all up: there is a lot to unpack. Which makes the show so great. And I think about the Wednesday-Weems and Morticia-Enid parallels constantly.
hiiii! have you considered releasing tradewinds as a single purchase through a site like gumroad?
Hi anon!
So the reason Tradewinds was shelved and not published like 8 years ago, is because I couldn't find an Aboriginal sensitivity reader willing to read m/m with disturbing themes. I had sensitivity readers for the other side of things (like Matan and his heritage), but I kept either not finding anyone, or the one person I found took my $200 USD deposit and vanished and never spoke to me / responded to any of my emails.
As a result, I was uncomfortable distributing it anywhere broadly, even though I was relatively confident the novel isn't offensive, because I just don't know 100%.
I am a lot more confident releasing it via subscription as an exclusive novel, because the people who pay for subscription are often folks who are a) already used to my style of writing and b) generally know what to expect from me, vs. cold audiences who don't. I'm kind of kicking myself that I didn't realise that Tradewinds would make a great exclusive/paywalled release for subscription, because it means it's only ever going to find a very narrow bandwidth of readers.
Basically if I could release it for single purchase - as basically an ebook - I would have released it like 8 years ago, anon. And the reason I have actually released it this specific way is down to the fact that I'm just not really confident offering it for broader distribution.
That might change one day, if I happen to stumble across a sensitivity reader who is okay with my style of writing, who is reputable + has references (i.e. so I know I won't lose a fair chunk of money in the process, because that burned me pretty badly, not gonna lie). But until then, having Tradewinds be limited is the only way I'm comfortable releasing it at all.
Folks are more than welcome to sign up for one month, download the book (and read any other early access they want) and then leave. They can even just put 'I only wanted one thing and now I have it' in the exit survey so I know what they were there for if they want. Then it's still a single purchase (with some early access extras), and they still access the downloadable file. :)