#literally i should shut the fuck up

[mazeyphaedra]

was rewatching fabian’s baron moment on account of it being the most delicious piece of pvp in my recent memory and ally beardsley’s growth as a player just shone through so brightly and with such clarity. after dusting off their shock they immediately asked about the nemesis ward, had enough knowledge about fellow pcs stocked to remember adaine’s ac with such like frustrated confidence and certainty, suggested to siobhan to dimension door out of adaine’s room, like. they came into this making a character with 4 dex. and now the dice deity offered to roll a check to sense if adaine was in danger. making decisions, asking questions, getting invested in the story, trying so hard with the tools they have to save characters from danger; ally beardsley is an incredible d&d player.

#blahblah tried to fly with a ribbon dancer SHUT UP. SHUT UP THEY HAD A VISION. #margaret encino’s call to the guards in battle of the brands is also a good moment #‘bonus action pick up a turtle and kiss it’ is CHARMING and FUNNY and APPRECIATES the art team #i swearrr to god if anyone comments abt them trying to railroad other players' actions. what the fuck do you want from them. #u hate when they play kristen as unserious when she’s literally a teenager with adhd + when theyre literally a comedian on a d&d comedy sho #but if theyre invested in other pc’s welfare youll shut them down too? bffr #ally beardsley you are so special to me #fully aware theyre an adult who likely does not care about people on the internet talking abt how theyre doing their job. as they should #they dont need defending they shouldnt need it people should just be normal abt them and until they are beardsley get behind me #yna.txt #fantasy high junior year spoilers #fhjy spoilers #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #dimension 20 #d20 #ally beardsley

[brookheimer]

not sure why people don't seem to understand that shiv being the victim of misogyny and vitriol from all the men in her life can and does coexist with the fact that she is not a feminist liberal hero fighting to save democracy. why is it that we never afford her any nuance? she's either the only good person on the show and deserves to kill every man in a ten foot radius (twitter) or a uniquely evil cruel sociopath with no heart fueled entirely by spite (reddit). is it not just so much more interesting for her to be a fascism aiding and abetting character like the rest of them who also views herself as more progressive in spite of everything else about her and who undergoes horrific treatment at the hands of the men around her yet has no interest in undoing the system that allows them to do so, only in ruling it herself? shiv is not any better than the others nor is she any worse than them. there's no Evil Olympics here guys, nor should there be. snook said it herself in the after credits sequence -- shiv was just lucky that her interests aligned with her sympathies. who knows what she would've done had mencken been her best personal option? yes she cares infinitely more about politics than roman, yes she is still very much interested in maintaining the capitalist, fascist structure and even strengthening it, so long as it ends with her on top (which either way would be a win for liberal causes bc Woman). fascism isn't one-size-fits-all. it's not just mencken and trump. it's also mattson. it's also logan. it's also roman and shiv and kendall. that's... kind of one of the main points of succession? but even so, that does not negate the fact that as a woman it is so hard to watch some of the scenes with her and tom/roman/kendall -- of course that misogyny will resonate with female viewers, as it should!!! but that resonance needs to coexist with a deeper understanding of her character -- if you want to root for a bad bitch fighting against misogyny go watch, i don't know, captain marvel or whatever. what makes shiv interesting is that she's so so so much more than that -- she is the product, victim, and perpetrator of misogyny and fascism, two concepts so heavily intertwined they're virtually inextricable from each other. tl;dr it's one thing to be like my god someone give shiv a gun and it's another entirely to say, entirely seriously, that shiv is the Good Liberal Feminist One and the rest are all evil. like i absolutely adore shiv but i would honest to god find her so fucking boring if she were actually the person these tweets make her out to be i'm sorry

#me: shiv isn't evil! \ everyone: oh so she's the only good one? #me: shiv isn't good! \ everyone: oh so she's the only evil one? #NUANCE GUYS. IT EXISTS. #honestly i just don't get it. how are you all not just like bored by the versions of these characters you've created #all this being said. every man that called shiv hysterical tonight should be shot and killed. #<3 #succession #succession spoilers #casey shut the fuck up about shiv roy #shiv roy #long post #100 #500 #1000 #dude if i thought this would get notes i would’ve proofread it first. LMAO #like this is literally a word vomit ramble that i didn’t even read before posting . embarrassing 4 me #this time on posts i didn’t expect to get notes

[jewreallythinkthat]

The most moderate, nuanced and productive people I have discussed the Israel-Hamas war with have been Jews, Israelis, and people with Palestinian family. Everyone directly affected by this just wants it to stop and to have peace and safety in the region in a way that minimises the casualty count.

The most extreme and performative and vile things I've been told are by people who have no connection to this and like to think they are experts because they have covered adjacent topics during learning, or read stuff online.

If all the randos in the west would just shut up for ten minutes and let those of us actually affected, with an understanding of the history of the land and the culture and the generational trauma experienced by Jews and Palestinians alike talk, we might actually have a chance to salvage this and stop it spiraling

#jumblr #antisemitism #i/p #nuance is something so easy to have and yet people choose not to #we are measured and non extreme because we dont have the privilege to be angry. #someone literally said that they wont ensge further with me because the topic makes me emotional #jews get called genocidal #palestinans get called Antisemitic #how about the rest of you shut the fuck up and let the adults talk #maybe youll learn how to problem solve and not be a bigot if you listen to those you so desperately want to hate #its pathetic #we all know hamas doesnt represent all Palestinians #we also know hamas teaches Antisemitism in schools in gaza and the west bank #these two things can and should co-exist in your head #that doesnt meam all palestinians are rabid jew hating murderers #it means the situation is complicated and not black and white and will take more than just screaming for a ceasefire to actually solve #we are not a football for your performative activism

[essektheylyss]

Honestly, it is so funny remembering that Annabeth Chase's literal, stated, canonical fatal flaw is hubris.

Rick Riordan was like, "This clever, neurodivergent preteen girl believes that she is smarter than the gods, and she will get the chance to prove herself right," and he was correct. 😌

#pjo #honestly annabeth best character cuz in the end the gods straight up are like 'you're right. here's your dream come true' #like never once did mr. riordan say 'and she should stop being like that.' #honestly in general mega props to pjo for framing fatal flaws as a source of strength consistently #both percy and annabeth in the end get to be So Valid in their fatal flaws lmao #like it's so funny that in the end percy straight up is like 'I don't know shit but you all need to shut up and listen to annabeth' #and annabeth is like 'I might be an asshole but percy is the best most loyal person I know and we all need to be willing to die for him' #and they both are so correct for it. the NARRATIVE SAYS THEY ARE CORRECT ON BOTH COUNTS. #actually uwu cuz like #thinking about the fact that annabeth takes that dagger to protect percy and it's basically her last major act before the battle is won #and the fact that percy appeals to luke by saying 'annabeth was right listen to her' and that's how he finally wins #literally using each other's fatal flaws to win and live. ANYWAY I MADE MYSELF EMOTIONAL #as you can tell i will be a fucking wreck once the series comes out nobody touch me.

[inkskinned]

one of the oddest arguments i've ever gotten into was like. i had agreed to give a dude a chance. we were on a first date. and he got. just. so mad. because i had told him i read about 2-5 books a week.

but he found out it was actually that i listen to 2-5 audiobooks. he was dead set on the idea - that's not reading, it's just listening. that i was lying, somehow, by implying i'd "read" the book.

language has a beautiful ability to adapt over time, particularly in the face of technology. when i "connect to the internet" i'm referencing the oldschool method of literally plugging into the internet - which i very rarely physically do. i roll down my window, which is a reference to the circular mechanical action it used to take. hell - the floppy disc remains our resolute save file icon. when i say i "ran to the store," nobody expects me to actually run - and what my version of running to the store looks like and your version are probably pretty different.

i told the guy, baffled: i look at things through glasses, that's still seeing. nobody complains i'm filtering the image.

he says: that's not the same and you know it.

i use audiobooks because i have adhd, and it makes it so i can actually focus. i am using it to help a medically diagnosed condition.

language also has a really cool ability: when we read something, our brains look at a word and make an image. when we hear a story, our brains hear a word and make an image. whether we hear it or read it - the word means the same thing, written or spoken. there is no quantifiable difference in the knowledge-encoding experience - i still happily hallucinate while i'm listening.

and i just kind of stared at him while he was telling me that "claiming" i had "actually read" a book that i had actually-listened-to was lying

and my only baffled response was like: "... are you gatekeeping the experience of... reading?"

#1. do you think someone who listens to 2-5 books a week DOESNT read with her eyes? #2. i was fucking BLIND for TWO MONTHS #so YEAH maybe im SENSITIVE #3. shut the FUCK up i am not DESTROYING SOCIETY by being like ''hahaha this experience is basically the same for me'' #i am still fucking engaging with the literature dude #4. i consider it reading. die mad about it #5. this is just a personal note but they are LITERALLY equivalent to me #bc i mean i guess 7k posts in i should probably finally admit #i have a lowkey form of synesthesia #to be fair i didn't know until like this year when my therapist was like #''... you WHAT'' #but like when im talking i see words and when im writing i legit hear them #like HEAR THEM #i just thought everyone had that #thats called thinking #but it turns out the fact that i sometimes mishear a word and write down what i misheard #means maybe i am fuckt a little in my head #anyway obvi when i read i hear the word too #i cAN sometimes see other people's words but it's usually just my own #and i was like #(again) #thats just like how . people talk #but it turns out if u sometimes misread what you're supposed to be saying #something might be . uhhhhhhhh #not normal #fun fact. #it turns out (i havent googled but she said) #that it's not UNUSUAL for neurodiverse people to have like #SOME lowkey form of synesthesia #but we only associate it with REALLY severe cases so we just assume like .... couldn't be me

[kaladinkholins]

yeah taimizu IS toxic and off putting actually ‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️

EDIT: TO BE CLEAR THIS IS A POST IN FAVOUR OF TAIMIZU!!! I AM A DIRTY TAIMIZU SHIPPER!!!!!

#it's funny because that was my FIRST thought about them but then i realised wait this is scratching some itch in my brain #people are all very correct about this btw and their discomfort and dislike of the ship is valid #but it's so interesting to me and that's why these days I'm leaning further into that toxic aspect of their rship in my art #that whole “strangles you with the red string of fate” drawing i did was meant to capture that as well #like this equal amount of aggression and twisted affection/attraction they have for one another #like it's very fucked up #and people are not wrong to think so but i enjoy it LOL #one of the theses of my fic is literally “theyre fucked up but they make it work” #like i dont want them to be perfectly healed and normal by today's standards #i want them to be crazy and murderous but work through their shit individually AND together and make things work #and have feral nasty sex bcs mizu deserves to be a pillow princess (TO MEEEEE) #i still have a meta drafted that actually goes in depth on their rship and why we “”“should”“” root for them #but my brain is goop rn and cramps are KILLING MEEEEE so have this first instead #taimizu #blue eye samurai #fandom.rtf #shut up haydar #wank.mp3

[rapidhighway]

literally obsessed with this image hes so fuckignnngg tiny hes standing on his toes

#HES SO SMAL #i will never shut the fuck up atbout archie sonic im sorry its literally good idgaf #knuckles the echidna #archie sonic #locke the echidna #sorry for forcing you to look at happy locke he should always be tortured and in pain imo #knuckles the echidna issue 25

[brother-emperors]

I'm making a note about medici, because I tried to watch it but found it so dull I could hardly get through the first season. Can you reccomend any historical shows or films that do pass the vibe check?

off the top of my head, some personal favorites are: season one of Kingdom (킹덤) 2019 (period horror set in the Joseon era)

Barbarians (Barbaren) 2020 (arminius, baby!)

Heneral Luna & Goyo (philippine revolution)

Showtime’s The Borgias (all time favorite forever)

Wolf Hall (2015) (an adaption of Hilary Mantel’s novels)

#ask tag #I actually like barbarians more than hbo rome bc I like the messy themes exploration regarding what forced assimilation will do #and the resulting internal/external conflict and trauma especially in the larger stage of resistance to imperial force #it’s relatable! (stares at the camera in filipino) #(hbo rome should be on this list but everyone recommends it so I skipped it lmao) #(canal+ Borgias is not good except for when it is but it fucks up the ending so bad after such killer s3 build up its unforgivable however… #it’s one of those shows that I don’t recommend but also can’t shut up about. Cesare Borgia literally sleeping in gore. wow #if you have to pick between canal+ and showtime do the showtime one)

[p4nishers]

ok but the fact that "aziraphale is softening. they haven't spoken in a hundred years: he's realizing they're still friends" and "there's no need to thank me that's what...friends...are for" was in the same night is making me go INSANE

#we NEED to talk more abt the 1941 ep im so serious im not normal about it like i had such high expectations and it suppressed them all. #am i disappointed there wasn't a rejection scene like i predicted?? yes ofc but also aziraphale said he did the apology dance that year so #i wonder what else could've fucking happened #but anyway. let's focus on what DID happen: aziraphale literally GLOWING with love in the car. crowley telling him to shut up cause of a #compliment. aziraphale helping crowley out and crowley looking at him like 'you'd do that for me?'. crowley not only letting aziraphale #practice magic with him but ACTIVELY playing a character to help him and i mean that scene was literally just crowley flirting with him #crowley indulging aziraphale by going to the magic shop with him and agreeing to participate in his show despite the fact that he NEVER EVEN #SHOT A GUN BEFORE. him just leafing thru the guidebook till he realizes there's a miracle blocker than starting to frantically flip thru it #her hands SHAKING on the gun and them being so afraid of hurting az. 'no paperwork :))' sure my guy that's what u r so happy about ofc #'but do u really think it went well' 'absolutely' with such sincerity. the book description saying smth abt ifa demon were to happen across #aziraphale they should report it immediately to the demon crowley. 'you could've just walked away' 'well you said 'trust me'' 'and you did' #its just. its one of my favorite eps it's so nice #good omens #azicrow #good omens s2 #aziracrow #go s2 spoilers #go s2 #good omens script book #good omens s2 spoilers #aziraphale x crowley

[sovonight]

i've now signed myself up for seven pages but it'll all be worth it when i can add them neatly to the xadri masterpost

#he may merely be a candidate for king of evermeet but he's Already a king... of setting boundaries #ugh speaking of that i hate how in bg2 he's like 'so in another life you could've been queen of evermeet. does that satisfy your ego?' #WHAT EGO..... sir take a second look at your fiance. she literally became a rogue bc she wanted to disappear #'sovo there's no way bg2 xan could know that' hmm then he should shut the fuck up shouldn't he #sovo art

[strangersatellites]

strangers 1.3k words

inspired by ethel cain's song "strangers" and if you read this it is a requirement that you listen to it. (its linked at the bottom)

idk team I was just listening to this song for the millionth time and needed to get this out, so here's 1.3k words of Eddie experiencing life after death and Steve dealing with grief and guilt I guess

Eddie is a ghost. 

He’s made his peace with that.

Some kind of Upside-Down ghost probably. He doesn’t really care.

The people of Hawkins don’t know that. They still believe, still fear that he’s out there somewhere. Everyone that cared about him knows better.

WIthout a proper grave he just kind of… drifts. 

Into and out of spaces, he leaves behind no trace save for a soft breeze if someone’s really paying attention.

They usually aren’t.

He’s not really a physical being so much as a feeling. Still in his body but less aware of it than he ever was. He thinks he couldn’t explain it if he wanted to. Couldn’t explain the way that people can’t see him or hear him when he’s there, but later feel like they had, and feel crazy trying to explain it. He’s had to learn his way around his new consciousness in a way that lets him be near the ones he cares about without hurting them. It's an exhausting cycle, to feel out of your mind.

He can see it in the way dread and grief tug at the shoulders of the people he loved. He knows this because the more someone thinks of him, the closer he can get to them. 

At first he was at home a lot. 

Well, as at home as he could be in this new place they’ve got Wayne in. It’s nowhere Eddie’d ever been when he was living, but Wayne’s there so it's home nonetheless. But as weeks turn into months the closest he can get is just outside the door. He can’t get inside, can’t actually see Wayne anymore. Can’t see the way that loneliness weighs him down. The way he picks himself up every time.

So he lets himself drift to wherever he’s pulled next. A time or two it's been to Jeff’s garage while he’s practicing. Several times he’s gotten to see inside Dustin’s room late at night before the kid falls asleep. 

But the place he’s finding himself more and more often, he didn’t recognize at first. He just knew it was a basement somewhere. Drafty, door locked tight, and with nothing but dusty tools to keep him company, he found comfort in knowing that someone was remembering him. Even if only a little. Even if it’s a stranger.

Eddie’s drifted in and out of whatever kind of consciousness he experiences for a while before his surroundings morph and change. 

The kitchen of the Harrington house he would recognize anywhere. 

He smiles as he takes in the new space and thinks that if he had a human body he’d be sat up on the counter just like he is now.

Steve walks into the kitchen with a furrow in his brow and Eddie takes the time to really look.

This is the first time he’s seen Steve since the last of his air left his lungs and he’s hit with a strange sense of longing. 

Can see it in the bags under Steve’s eyes that, even now, say he’s still carrying everything on his own.

He’d always done that.

When Eddie had made that stupid, stupid decision, though he’d be loath to admit it alive, he’d wondered if Steve would've done the same thing. 

He thinks they both knew the answer was yes and that that’s the reason Steve still looks like hell even months later.

He looks like hell but he’s still so handsome walking over toward Eddie now. 

Eddie knows he can’t see him, doesn’t know he’s there. But he still finds himself longing for the closeness when Steve grabs a glass from the cabinet and leaves the room again.

In an instant Eddie’s back in the basement. Steve’s memory of him gone as quick as it came as Eddie is left with the question that followed him his whole life:

Am I no good?

As he wastes away in the drafty, cold he realizes that he doesn’t feel a pull anywhere else. He decides that seeing Steve once in a while, if only for a short time, is better than being forgotten.

It becomes a routine. Eddie’s hours will turn into days, and he’ll lose track of time. Then he’ll blink and he’s watching Steve stare at himself in the mirror. He looks like he’s been crying and like he’s going to be sick. Eddie wants nothing more than to be able to comfort him. But as quick as they come, they go, and Eddie begins to connect the dots. 

Eddie’s memory, like everything else Steve seldom allows himself to feel, gets carried with him always. But he locks them away tight in his heart and only lets them out when he thinks no one is watching. When he thinks he’s allowed to miss Eddie.

So Eddie stays in the basement, stays in Steve’s heart, heavy, guilty, until Steve’s ready to face it again.

One day it catches Steve by surprise.

Eddie can tell because he’s in the middle of putting away groceries when Eddie gets there.

At first Eddie’s confused. But then he sees the milk carton in Steve’s hand with the big MISSING: EDDIE MUNSON and his photo on the side. There’s a sale sticker over his face in what was surely some angry grocer’s last ditch effort to sell milk with the Hawkins devil on the side.

Steve’s frozen just looking at it and honestly Eddie gets it.

After everything that was lost, this may very well be the only physical memory of him that’s left save for a polaroid photo in an evidence locker somewhere.

He’s able to drift close enough to hear the breath Steve lets out before he puts it in the fridge and finishes unpacking his bags.

From that point on Eddie’s no longer in the basement.

He’s able to drift all around Steve’s house and he learns that he can touch things.

He watches Steve’s smile come back when Robin’s over.

He flits his fingers across windchimes when the air is still and watches them take in the music.

He watches Steve crash after long days at work and drags a blanket up over his shoulder.

Sees his confused face when he wakes.

He looks on when Steve pours the milk down the drain and puts the empty carton right back in the fridge.

Even though this makes him sad, he makes a smiley face out of the magnets on the door. Hopes that Steve notices.

He sees him scream out his anger late into the night and wishes that he could touch Steve.

But as time goes on he’s able to witness the way that Steve learns to carry the guilt, but to also try to let himself breathe.

Eddie spends a lot of his time wishing he were alive so that he could tell Steve he’s proud of him. That he could tell him he’s surrounded by people who would help him carry it all if he would just put it down. Wishes he were alive for a lot more reasons than just that.

But the night he gets the closest is when he figures out that he can use the phone in the office to call the one in Steve’s room while he’s away.

He’d learned early on in this afterlife that if he spoke he wouldn’t be heard. But he has a hunch that this might be an Upside-Down loophole.

He’s sitting on the floor across from where Steve’s lying in bed, and he’s watching the stream of tears drip down his pretty, pretty face while he listens to the voicemail.

Hey Stevie.

Called you just to tell you that I made it real far, and that I never blamed you for loving the way that you do while you were torn apart.

I would still wait with you there.

Don’t think about it too hard or you’ll never sleep a wink at night again. Don’t worry about me, Stevie, just know that I loved you.

And I’ll see you when you get here.

#steddie #kinda #im not even going to properly tag this #this is purely self-indulgent #sad steddie hours #gin writes #things I wrote instead of things I should be writing #y'all like actually have to listen to the song to get the full effect of this #if y’all haven’t gotten the gist by now #preachers daughter literally changed my life #and i will never shut the fuck up about it

[gregoftom]

pretty sure i’ve seen romance movies with scenes like this

#tomgreg #where do i even start with t his horseshit okay here we fucking go. #so tom's first instinct is to go to greg when he's on shaky ground with shiv. the only way he feels safe is to have GREG with him. #who tf would want greg as an attack dog??!?!? lets be fucking real. when he says that i think he means just a dog. just someone loyal. #who loves him and won't dick him around. i think he's pretty tired of it by now. #he wants an alliance with like. ok in this show who would you pick to ally with. i love greg but he's abso useless in terms of skills that #would keep you safe. if anything TOM would keep HIM safe. in fact tom himself says who else has taken care of you. literally spells it out. #he even says greg is a joke; will fail; will fuck up; so what use does he have for tom other than companionship. other than love? #a dog might do tricks for you but your main reason for getting one is usually love. right? at least it should be. it would be in tom's case. #and don't even fucking get me STARTED on ''do you wanna come with me? ...sporus?" like girl. #you know what you told him about nero and sporus right. and now you're saying to him; yeah i was talking about you. #you and me. you're my favourite and i wasn't joking when i said i'd marry you. #the whole while tom is asking greg to be his attack dog his fuckin. eyes and expression we get it you're in love with him. like it's ridic. #and all this coming with phrasing it sounds like they're fucking ELOPING. I HATE IT!!!!!! SHUT UP! stop saying that fucking shit god. god #they are so annoying. anyway #the way tom's voice breaks as he says he has things to do [what things. will i find out later.] and the deal and!! #what am i gonna do with a soul anyways... i have you what do i need it for. and as that paragraph said somewhere. he castrates his soul. #then they giggle and are fucking annoying and greg'S HANDS LOOK LIK EHE'S ABOUT TO IDK. HUG TOM? AROUND THE MIDDLE MAYBE #or do something else. and then they just hug instead and i fucking. ugh. i've had enough tbh good fucking bye

[definitelynotnia]

im sorry i have to rant im so fucking pissed

my exams end on 19th and I have to get rid of some books and buy some books which are quite pricy online so I had planned on going to college street on 20th and selling my books and buying the new ones at a cheap price and i was frankly really excited about it because all I get is a one day break to relax bcz i have to start studying for entrances from 21st so all I have is 20th and i wanted to spend it at college street and then get some food and basically have like a solo date kind of thing.

and i was so so excited about it i told my boyfriend about it like 500 times bcz i kept forgetting i've already mentioned it and it was literally on my mind a lott so i kept bringing it up and ik it seems like not a big deal cz i can just sit at home and chill too but i literally do not get to go outside my house. like- the last time i went out was new years eve and after that the only time i've gone out is to school or to give my boards that is it. my mother has some weird like problem wiht me going out like even if i tell her that i just want to go to our terrace for 5 minutes just to get some fresh air she won't even allow that she'll be all suspicious and like sTaNd In ThE bAlCOnY aNd TaKe FrEsH aIr like she herself doesnt leave the house (and blames it on me and my brother ???? when have we ever stopped you bro, she said I HaVe To Be HeRe To KeEp An EyE like im 18 i dont need to be watched 24/7 stop blaming me for choices you put upon yourself) and i just feel so suffocated ALL THE TIME i feel so overstimulated and im so sick of rotting on my bed and i dont want to wait for some birthday party or friends meet up to be able to leave my goddamn house i just wanted to go and have a fun day and get me some books thats it.

anyway so initially the plan was that my mom would go along but something came up so she wanted to postpone it to 21st and i didn't want to bcz i'd already be missing 3 days bcz of my boyfriends birthday, holi and my brothers birthday (all of which are important and i dont want to miss which makes me the villain apparently bcz i should "adjust" and cancel my "parties" instead of trying to stick to my plan bcz that makes me too demanding and selfish apparently) so i suggested that ukw why dont u go do ur thing which came up and i'll go to college street by myself...which is when the solo date idea came which i had really wanted all along but didnt bring up bcz i knew she'd say no but now there's a valid reason for me to go alone so like, its a pretty easy fix i can just go alone but noooo. First of all,

I've been to college street multiple times before so its not like its an unknown area to me

im going by metro which is quite safe

im going when there is stark daylight and i will return home much much before it gets dark and im literally 18

she never lets me go anywhere alone, not even take ubers alone if i want to get back from somewhere my bf has to come drop me everytime and then go backwards to his house which is so so so stupid and i never get to go out alone unless accompanied by family or by a male friend, so obv when i said i'll go to college street alone she refused to let that happen and started screaming about how 'if its so important to go on 20th bcz u dont want to miss a day of studying then cancel ur 'parties' and study then' and i was like no its not about missing a day its just that there's a very easy and logical fix to this problem which is i go alone and its not inconveniencing anyone so why cant i just do that but she will not listen to that bcz im 'adamant' and 'everything has to be according to me' bcz i found a viable solution to the problem. so instead of letting me just go she was literally ready to pay much more money and buy the books online, like.....why cant i just go bro??? (and she keeps telling me im a waste of her money bcz i will amount to nothing in life and my education was a failed investment or wtv so like now why are u wasting more money??? im literally trying to save the money that u 'waste' on me so just let me ???)

anyway i called my dad last night and told him and he was super ok with the idea he said its a good idea that i go alone and that he would speak to her but then today when i asked her if dad spoke to her she said yes, we'll go on 20th and i was like .....we? so apparently she CANCELLED her previously immovable thing for which she wanted me to cancel my 'parties', she cancelled that and agreed to go with me on 20th just so that i dont get to go alone- like ???????????????? what is ur problemmmm

so obv i was super annoyed and i went on a whole ass rant about how i literally struggle to even cross roads bcz i dont know shit about basic travelling bcz all my life ive been in a car and its a running joke with all my guy friends that i 'cannot navigate' and 'dont know any places' and obv??? if im never allowed to go anywhere then how tf will i know the places- the only places i know is bcz recently i've been paying a lot of attention and asking my dad stuff about what roads to take to reach certain places and when i go out with my friends i kind of try and learn a bit but thats it i've only ever gone alone completely alone to two places which is my beauty parlour thats 5 minutes away from my house and one bazaar one time that was 2 bus stops away, thats it. thats my extent of public travelling alone. and now im supposed to go to a whole new STATE for college and i cant even call myself an auto without struggling. and like- is this not a basic life skill??? like ok yeah its not rocket science and i will probably figure it out even if i start later in life but why not now? most of my guy friends literally go everywhere alone, why not me? and my dad agreed with all of this but my mom was just like "you'll be in the hostel only, no need to go out of the campus" like ARE YOU FOR REAL????????? and she's like "if u want to learn skills learn how to cook" like ok yes i will also learn how to cook for sure but i wont have a fucking kitchen in the hostel but somehow cooking is an urgent skill i should learn but going places by myself is unimportant bcz i should just never? leave? the? hostel?

anyway after much screaming and shouting my dad gave up and just cut the call bcz he doesnt want to get into an argument with my mother and my mother was being all suspicious like why do u hAvE tO gO aLoNe AlL oF a SuDdEn even though i literally explained why i want to do this alone but she doesnt think thats valid. so she refuses to let me go and i asked her for one reason why i shouldnt cz usuallt its always "no u have exam what if smthn happens" but now i literally dont even have exam so whats ur excuse now? streets will always be unsafe forever so "what if smthn happens" is not a reason to never let me go out without a man so just gimme one reason and she couldnt give me a single reason she just said "i said no, thats it".

and now she's gone off about how im useless and blah blah and "high maintainance" bcz i want books and "everyone else (some pishi's son) just studies online" and so the whole option of college street is apparently now cancelled and she's trying to set up a whole ass kindle account (half the books i need arent even available as ebooks) just because i wanted to go by myself.

#in our house kids dont stay outside past 6:30pm'' but now all of a sudden its fine for my brother to play #till 10:30 at night #she literally stopped me permanently from going down in the evenings since i was in class 7-8 #this is why ive never had any friends outside of school bcz she wouldnt let me leave ths fucking house #and now that my brother is in class 7 #he's allowed to be out playing with his friends till 10 freaking 30 #he comes home an hour late sometimes...45 minutes and almost always at least 30 minutes late at NIGHT and she says nothing except like #one sentence #yeah im only the villain i only keep u locke #up in the house its all my fault #this is just so damn unfair #like literally insulting #im not a child what is her problem #what sort of fucking solution is 'never leave the hostel' like ok even if i do that what happens then??? after i graduate? #i'll be a 24 year old who doesnt know shit about going from one place to another without a man present] #and then this woman preaches how she 'always raises her son and daughter equally' like srsly shut the fuck up #my whole life i've been told abar late?'' #and for me bcz i would come home 5-10 minutes late nd i did it maybe once or twice she made me completely stop going down to play #5-10 minutes late from 6:30 wherein he comes an hour late from 9 fucking 30 #and this sounds so stupid bcz im an 18 year old now and i dont give a fuck abt how long i got to play but its just unfair dude #with me it was always smthn or the other either exams or she gets miraculously sick every time i want to go out to play #im not even kidding she did a whole “i have fever and ur going to leave me like this and go play?” on me one time bcz i was adamant abt goi #after months of not being able to go bcz of exam or smthn or the other #she did not have any fever it was fucking bullshit #and how am i supposed to help with ur imaginary fever anyway im literally 12 #its so fucking annoying man and then if i say anything at all she'll go on a tirade about how #like YOU DO THOUGH??????? im sorry ur feelings are hurt bcz i said you do smthn that u LITERALLY DO #istg not even 2 days ago she was having a fight with my dad abt how he should teach my brother to learn how to cycle so that he can go buy #groceries #i can cycle

[bulbabutt]

no offence (full offence) but if you genuinely rank tmnt 2014 above the next mutation you have bad taste and hate women and have no joy in your heart

#I’m seeing a lot of hate always to be like ‘how did anyone ever say rise was the worst when tnm’ SHUT UP #YOURE FALLING FOR THE DUMBASS TOXIC MASCULINITY VIDEO ANALIST PROPAGANDA #YOURE JUST TURNING THE HATE AROUND FOR NO REASON #BE JOYFUL AND REMEMBER THAT 2014 HAS NO FUCKING TURTLES IN IT AND MADE SHREDDER A WHITE MAN #yes I should be sleeping but saw one joke too many and got mad leave me alone #sometimes you just need to keep in mind that that show existed to keep the turtles brand alive during a dip and did just that #and that what they added was fun and goofy and acting like it’s supposed to be ‘good’ is dumb #look at bonesteel. look at silver. what the hell how are you gonna have a bad time THE MONKEY IS WEARING A SUIT! #they literally have an episode where they take in the shredder LIKE CHILL OUT BRO ITS NOT THAT SERIOUS #If it was animated you would see #anyway VENUS

[bucksboobs]

I’m the anon from the post before and I understand what you mean! I guess I just took differently when I watched the show. I don’t think Charlie or Nick was upset about Ben being closeted I think they (especially Charlie) we’re just upset how Ben treated Charlie the entire. Also I’m not saying this to be rude or start anything this is just how I saw it:) I think Charlie was angry (as he should) about how Ben treated him through out the relationship they had and not about him being closeted. Because I do believe if Ben just communicated better and treated him better and didn’t treat Charlie the way he did it could’ve worked out. I’m just saying that I didn’t see them bashing Ben for being closeted only bashing him for treating Charlie the way he did without acknowledging how it felt for him.

Yeah I don't think Charlie or Nick is mad about Ben being closeted but weirdly I think the narrative is and that's what irks me. All his issues and bad behaviors are because he's closeted (you said yourself that it's because he's closeted that he treats Charlie the way he does) but the story doesn't seem interested in exploring that so much as punishing him for it by having both Imogen and Charlie yell at him and then throwing him out of the series before he can improve at all.

And when this show is so renowned for it's love and celebration of queer experiences and identity it will always feel out of place that Ben was left out in the dust seemingly because he and his experiences were too complex.

#ben hope #heartstopper #sorry if you really like the show but I am absolutely not the only one that found the handling of Ben uncomfortable #especially when the character is so so young literally the same age as Nick #to deny him the chance to grow feels wrong to me and a lot of other gay men who didn't have our shit together by 16 #like this kid hasn't even taken his GSCE's which I assume are similar to the SATs or the Baccalauréat! #he needs to be given the opportunity to grow and he essentially gets the door shut in his face when he's trying to apologize #and to add to it Charlie gets that 'ambush me into accepting your apology' line that once again frames his own growth as a manipulation #which is FUCKED UP! #and from a writing perspective portrays the hand of the author pointing and screaming Hate This Boy Hate Him Hate Him #and the hand of the author should not be that obvious #it makes it feel disingenuous and as if Ben is just a stand in for someone who treated the author poorly #again this is all from a narrative perspective not a character perspective I want to make that clear because I see gay mutuals being lit up #by people who think Charlie should have been forced to forgive Ben or something #but thats not at all the argument any of us are making here

[andorerso]

if I see one more person blaming Cassian for Bix’s torture, I fear I’m gonna commit murder

let’s get one thing clear: it isn’t anybody’s fault but Dedra’s and the doctor’s. they’re the ones who tortured her and they’re the ones solely responsible here. nobody else.

keep Cassian’s name out of your mouth if you’re gonna talk shit

#andor spoilers #yes i did genuinely see people doing that #im literally gonna get violent #also if we wanna get technical bix was in contact with luthen way before cassian #y'all really think they wouldn't have gone after her regardless of cassian? #why not blame luthen then no? #or maybe we should also blame bix for paak right? #i mean by this logic you kinda have to #or maybe we should blame the people actually responsible #be for fucking real #y'all just wanna hate cassian for the sake of hating him #in which case.... go fucking watch something else im serious #this show isn't for you #andor #shut up sissi