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stargazing-enby · 5 years

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For the fanfic asks (it's a lot sorry 😅): F ; G ; I ; K ; O ; P ; Q ; R ; S ; T ; U ; X ; Y ; Z

Hahaha oh god, this is a perfect excuse for me to procrastinate! Thanks!

F: share a snippet from one of your favourite dialogue scenes you’ve written and say why you’re proud of it.

Oh my god, did you know dialogues are my favourite part of my own fics? I have so many dialogues that I love. Right now I’m obsessed with some of my wireless dialogues. But that’s supposed to be anon, so… here’s one that I particularly adore instead. It’s from my fic Reaching Out:

“So…”

“So,” Draco agreed. “Why were you crying?”

“I don’t think I’m done crying yet,” Potter muttered. Draco just raised his eyebrows at him, which made Potter scowl and look away. “Okay, okay. It’s just…it’s not important.”

Draco had seen Potter’s dead body lying at the Dark Lord’s feet, and yet, somehow, Potter looked more vulnerable at that moment that he had at the time.

Maybe it was because it was Draco. There had always been something between them, after all. Something shrewd and irresistible; something dangerous and crude that stripped them of their walls and exposed their deepest fears and urges.

And now he was imagining Potter stripping himself naked. Thanks for the analogy, brain, he thought grumpily as he felt his cheeks heat up. “It must have been important if it made you cry like that,” he said, in an attempt to prevent Potter from noticing.

“But it wasn’t,” Potter insisted. “Nothing happened. It’s all in my head. I keep thinking–no, these thoughts keep popping up in my head and I… I don’t want to hear them anymore.”

“What do they say?” Draco asked.

“That… that I’m unimportant. That I might just as well disappear, because it wouldn’t make a difference.”

Ah, thought Draco. That was certainly something he could relate to.

“Potter, we’re all unimportant. Every single one of us is no more than the product of an infinite series of coincidences. But you, unlike the majority of us, have already made a change in this world. Maybe… maybe that’s why you feel like there’s nothing linking you to it anymore.”

Potter shivered and curled his legs against his chest to hide his face. And Draco did the least sensible thing there was to do. He searched blindly for Potter’s hand and held on to it.

It’s not that amazing, but I was really inspired when I wrote it, and I really think Harry would feel like this after the war - that’s why I love it XD

G: Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write scenes out of order?

I write short one-shots from start to finish (except when I base them off a random scene that popped up in my head and I jotted down in my phone notes). But with longer fics?? Oh boi. I’m that writer that has planned out 6 different scenes even before they’ve started actually writing. My idea dumpster docs are full of completed scenes that won’t take place in another 20k XD

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

Draco. And. Harry. Cuddling. Please. And. Thank you.

K: What’s the angstiest idea you’ve ever come up with?

Probably half the plot for my unwritten unpublished wip, La Profecía. And also my horrorfest fic, which I recommend not reading, tbh XD

O: How do you begin a story - with the plot, or the characters?

I mostly write fic, so… the characters are always the same. But for my original stuff, it depends. Sometimes I write stuff based on my girlfriend’s drawings, in which case it’s the character that sets off the story. Most times I just start my stories off of feelings, and the characters sort of form themselves out of thin air. I’m known for mostly ignoring plots and concentrating on feelings XD

P: Are you what Geroge R. R. Martin would call an “architect” or a “gardener”? (How much do you plan in advance, versus letting the story fold as you go?)

I think I’m right in between. I plan scenes ahead (as I already said) and I do like to plan out what’s gonna happen during long fics, but for drabbles and half the scenes in my long fics I just let my fingers loose and allow them to do whatever they want to do. Sometimes I don’t even know what the heck I’m writing.

Q: How do you feel about collaborations?

They’re rad! I’m participating on this collab fic by @rose-grangerweasleyisbae , @jeldenil , @quicksilvermaid , @smittenwithdaydreams and I and it’s so much fun! Also, I love round-robins and the Drarryland owlery exchange :D

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

@fleetofshippyships , P.C Cast (author of the House of Night saga) and… idk who else, tbh XD

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

Eighth! Year!

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

MPreg XD I can’t think of anything else. Wait, yeah - shipping Snape XD I just… no thanks, not for me

U: Share three of your favourite fic writers and why you love them so much

Just three?!?!!?!?

Okay, unf.

@fleetofshippyships . She’s amazing. She got me into Drarry because I found a fic of hers by chance and I’M SO HAPPY THAT HAPPENED. I just love her fics so much I’ve gotten into other ships and fandoms just so I could keep reading her stuff. I read her stuff when I go to bed and have the best sleep. I’ve created fanarts for her fics. I just love her style, her character interpretations, her angst, her smut - and her, too XD yeah, Zoe, you read that right, I love you!!

@tepre . Listen, randomly offering to cheerlead this beautiful person with her fic was like, the best decision I’ve made in a while. Her way of writing is the most original, funny, witty thing I’ve ever seen - it just makes you laugh, and then cry, and then shake - it’s just so unexpected, unheard of, perfect. And her Draco????? I will sell my soul for her Draco. And for her. She’s such a nice person. Seriously. I just want to meet her and hug her like, yesterday. jfdisdsfnds.

@rose-grangerweasleyisbae . There’s something about her stories that calls me. I just can’t get over Drarry working through their mental health problems, and Drarry being hella queer and gender non conforming, and Drarry dealing with depression, PTSD, anxiety… and cuddles. And Donna writes all of that. U N F. I fall in love with every single stuff of hers I read. ;-;

If I could hug any of these amazing people I would be happy forever. Also, I deeply admire them ;-;

X: A character you enjoy making suffer.

Draco and Harry. I’m a bitch like that. But I always give them their happy ending, without exception.

Also, about 75% of my OCs end up dead or losing the person they love.

Y: A character you want to protect.

Draco and Harry. Again. Oh, and also Sirius. They deserved better.

Z: Major character death- do you ever write/read it? Is there any character whose death you can’t tolerate?

I write about how Sirius’s death affects Harry frequently, and I also kill many of my OCs and have killed Alice Longbottom in my horrorfest fic (linked above). BUT. I don’t read MCD. I’m not strong enough. And I cannot tolerate Harry or Draco’s death. At all.

Oof, that was long!!! Thank you for the ask XD And sorry everyone who got tagged and had to surf through this whole thing!

#fanfic asks #fanfic ask game #ask game #ask #drarry #anti snape #harry potter #anti mpreg #ptsd #trauma #anxiety #depression

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athyrabunlord · 7 years

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Daydream [VI] Hanamaru & Ruby

Reminder: This is based off of Daydream Warrior and this fanart I did Warning: Profanity, violence and sex. Ships: You>Chika>Kanan>Riko>?; with mentions of YouMari & KanaMari, and implied DiaYoshi & Maruby Words: 2,823 [concept doodle]

[I. Mari] [II. Chika] [III. Yohane] [IV. Kanan] [V. Dia] [VI. Hanamaru & Ruby] [VII. You] [VIII. Riko] [IX. ???]

VI. Hanamaru & Ruby

“But I want to go back” “To that day, the day we met” “My one wish goes ungranted”

“You’re not asleep, are you?”

You’s arm remained draped over her closed eyes. She felt the weight of someone sitting down beside her head as well as the pleasant floral scent that always seemed to accompany the speaker. She refused to budge from where she was sprawled on her back across the bench with her legs dangling over the edge.

A quiet sigh, though there was a hint of exasperated fondness. “Still, don’t sleep here in the open, you might get sick.”

You’s lips twitched in humor. “Isn’t there a saying that says bakas don’t get sick?”

She grinned behind her arm when the newcomer playfully ruffled her hair. “Don’t call yourself a baka, silly.”

“Hey! You’re messing up my hair!”

“It’s already messy to begin with though?”

“How mean,” You growled and sat up abruptly, batting the hand away from her head. She chuckled at the startled squeal and laughed even more so when the other girl punched her arm. “That’s weak, y’know.”

Another punch, this time more forceful, though nothing compared to the fist fights she was used to. Even then, she rubbed at her abused arm and whined. “Ow~! I’m gonna have a bruise tomorrow.”

“Baka…”

“Ah, so I really am a baka?”

Okay, she deserved that pinch, but her bandaged cheek was still sore from the brawl yesterday and she couldn’t suppress the urge to flinch. The same hand then gently caressed the injured area, as if apologizing for inflicting further pain. She closed her eyes briefly to relish the sensation before opening her eyes and turning to face her companion at last.

“Hey.”

“Hey you.” Amber eyes were filled with concern as the burgundy-haired girl lightly brushed her thumb over the bandage. “Why do you always get into fights-?”

“Now now, I don’t start them. Trouble comes looking for me, not the other way around,” You smiled wryly as she slouched in her seat. “They’re not that bad, and overall it’s good exercise, Riko-chan.”

“No, it’s not. One of these days you’ll get really hurt, and I don’t want that.” Riko said sternly, her fingers curling near You’s cheek as if threatening to pinch it again.

You backed away and pouted. “I know I know. Geez, you and Chika-chan won’t ever stop nagging at me, will you? Be proud, I stopped the fight before it got too bad, and came here to rest.”

“I see. Good, there’s improvement at least.”

Airily, Riko straightened and pulled out a familiar sketchbook from her bag. She ignored You’s questioning gaze and began to doodle the scenery. You’s blue eyes swept over the park, noting the few people strolling along the path, a kid playing with his dog over there, some flying their kites beyond the pond, and an old couple seated at a nearby bench and simply enjoying the nice weather. Everything seemed so picturesque, the tranquil atmosphere so good that it almost felt fake, especially compared to the frequent fights she’s gotten herself involved in.

Nevertheless, this wasn’t bad. This wasn’t bad at all. She could get used to such peace.

She listened to the quiet scratching sounds of the pencil as Riko sketched, smiling at the occasional pauses when the latter wasn’t pleased with the lighting or the composition.

“You’re not mad me?”

“Why would I be mad at you?”

“Aha, you are mad at me,” You peered at her friend and scooted closer. In response, Riko scooted away and resumed drawing like she wasn’t even here. Pouting again, You repeated her action and received the same reaction. The cycle continued until Riko was barely seated at the edge of the bench.

Huffing, she set down her sketchbook and scowled at the grinning You. “What?”

“Finally made you look at me.”

Riko raised an eyebrow and exhaled deeply. “Look, I’m not mad at you. Like I said, I’m just worried. Stop getting into fights so often. Chika-chan’s worried, Kanan-chan too.”

You rolled her eyes. “I can handle myself. Kanan should know that better than either of you.”

“Just promise us… promise me, okay?”

It was really difficult to say no, not under such pair of piercing, pretty eyes. You shrugged, holding her arms akimbo. “Alright! I’ll try to stay out of trouble. In exchange though, I wanna see this!”

Before Riko could react, You snatched the sketchbook out of her lap and flipped through the pages. She hummed in appreciation at the detailed drawings, some still life and some of animals. The recent pages, however, were filled with portraits of a ponytailed girl. Jogging, stretching, napping, drinking a bottle of water, or just smiling at the viewer.

Snickering, You wasn’t surprised to see Riko’s face turning beet red. “Does Kanan know?”

“Of course, but that doesn’t make this any less embarrassing. Can I have it back already?”

Taking pity on the blushing girl, You held out the sketchbook and chuckled again when Riko hugged it protectively against her chest. Silence fell upon them for a while, long enough for You to shuffle uncertainly. Was that too much teasing?

Just as she was about to apologize, Riko spoke up in a muffled voice. “Do you believe in true love, You-chan?”

For some reason, the question stung her more than any physical injury ever did. She immediately thought of a mikan-haired girl and her beautiful smile. This thought alone pained her just as much as it made her happy. Self-conscious, she scratched the back of her hair and mumbled. “… yeah, I do.”

Riko giggled at her response. The soft sound tickled inside her heart, yet she didn’t feel insulted or annoyed.

“Why do you ask anyway? You’re the happy couple, not me.”

“Just curious, that’s all.”

“Riko-chan…”

“It’s true, I just wanted to know your thoughts.”

You folded her arms, trying to read the soft smile on Riko’s visage. Was that bliss? Would she look like that too, if Chika were to accept her feelings? But that wouldn’t ever be possible, would it? After all, Chika loved someone else, someone who was also her friend.

And that person happened to be Riko’s girlfriend as well.

“Okay, now that you know, what’re you going to do?”

Riko turned away and looked into the sky, not smiling but not frowning either. Her whispered reply drifted with the breeze, so quiescent that You almost didn’t catch it.

“I’m going to set things right.”

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

“Don’t fall asleep here, you’ll get sick.”

You grunted but did not move to acknowledge the speaker. Her arm was draped over her face, shielding her closed eyes from the sunlight as she remained sprawled on her back across the bench. Her mind was a mess, chaotic even long after she had left the hospital. She’s wandered back to the park and found herself reminiscing her time with Riko.

Truth be told, she missed chatting with Riko. She didn’t remember what happened after that, though she did recall avoiding her since that puzzling conversation.

Why though?

You gritted her teeth and turned to her side, resting her arm against the cool and rough surface of the bench’s backrest. Ah, she didn’t want to be prodded about her feelings for Chika or talk about love, as subtle as Riko had been. Sometimes, You admired how Chika and Riko remained good friends under such circumstances, while she and Kanan…

Deep exhale. She clenched her fist and tried to ignore the throbbing pain from her wounds. That Dia may have cleaned and bandaged them, but her words had torn open something more painful. Perhaps she should go back to Chika now, as she promised she would. She couldn’t find her phone, which was prolly broken and still back at Chika’s place, and that was the excuse she kept telling herself to delay facing Chika again.

Again, she recalled Riko’s soft smile when the latter spoke of true love. How could Matsuura fucking Kanan betray her? Dragged Chika into this?

Someone to share your joy and pain, someone to talk to… someone to hug.

Only Mari understood You. She didn’t want to see either Chika or Riko. She wanted to see Mari at this moment, desperately so. In spite of whatever Mari had with Kanan, You still wanted to be with her. It wasn’t just about screwing each other senseless, or just having someone period. No, it wasn’t something as paltry as sex.

It was so much more than that, You was certain of it.

Her thoughts were rudely jostled out of her mind when petite hands pushed her further along the bench to make room. You’s legs dangled awkwardly over the edge while her face was uncomfortably squashed between her arm and the backrest. Growling in annoyance, she sat up and glared down at the short brunette and her pigtailed friend.

“What the fuck?”

“Language please,” Hanamaru was unfazed, her thick novel open in her lap. She didn’t even glance in You’s direction. “You were in my seat, so I moved you.”

You pulled back her fist, fully intending to at least punch the spot beside the girl’s shoulder to scare her. She stopped in mid-motion however, when her glare found Ruby’s green eyes. They were unnerving, emotionless and severe.

It was the same way Dia looked at her, back in the hospital.

Deep breath. In and out. In and out. You clenched her eyes shut and slouched in her seat. The tense silence was intermittently interrupted by the rustling sound of Hanamaru flipping the pages of her book. She should just leave and save herself from this inexplicable stress, but her pride refused to give in. Why should she get out of the way? She was here first!

“… there are so many other benches available, why this one?” You looked around the park, noting the lack of passersby, empty benches and the dried up pond.

“I always read my book with Ruby-chan here, and I don’t intend to change that,” Hanamaru’s gaze remained fixated on the novel’s small print. Ruby appeared to be reading over her friend’s shoulder as well.

“A stubborn one, aren’t you?”

“Not as much as you, You-san.”

“Ha! You think you know me?” She angrily recalled their encounter days ago, also here at the park. “What, you want me to wake up? Is that it?”

The brunette shrugged, her voice flat with nonchalance. It was clear that she didn’t give a fuck. “Awake, asleep, daydreaming, does that matter? You remain the same no matter what. Why do I even try?”

Again, You was seized by the violent urge to hurt the smaller girl. Not out of desire to cause her pain, but rather to solicit some sort of emotion out of her and her friend. Any other girls would have fled or screamed in fear if You were to glare at them like this, but not these two. It wasn’t as if You enjoyed terrifying younger girls, but such reaction would have been normal at least.

Hanamaru and Ruby’s lack of expected response was unsettling.

You covered her face and chuckled sardonically. Did she just wish for normality? What a fucking joke! She thrived in chaos. Only in bloody fistfights did she feel alive. Peace? What peace? She will never know peace.

It was not meant for her. Fact.

“What’s that book? Is it really that interesting?”

“Oh it is. Riko-san recommended it to us. We would like to finish it.”

You pursed her lips, unsurprised by their acquaintance of the artist. They came to the park often enough, they might have even bonded over common interests. Literature was a form of art too. Riko used to mention her friend Dia preferring classic literature, while her other friend enjoyed fantasy and in particularly the occult.

Right. Yohane and Riko were good friends, and that was how she came to know the eccentric gothic girl.

“Where’s your friend?”

Neither Hanamaru nor Ruby answered her.

“I was looking for her.”

Hanamaru turned a page, her expression unreadable as able. “Then keep looking.”

“Smartass,” You rubbed her chin. “Odd, I swore you used to speak in an odd accent or dialect of some sort, at least around her. Yohane-chan I mean.”

“Is that so?” There was an indiscernible tremor in her voice.

“Yup. Well, I don’t give a shit how you speak, just pointing it out.”

Silence again.

“How about you?” She shifted her attention to the pigtailed girl. “Say something. You mute or what?”

Ruby blinked and stared at her with those disturbingly blank eyes again. Her lips remained sealed.

“You are mute then.”

Ruby returned her gaze back to the book.

“No seriously, I was looking for your friend. She was talking to me but then she disappeared out of the blue-”

The book was slammed shut so abruptly that it made a cringe-worthy thud. There was something ugly and abhorrent in Hanamaru’s brown eyes. It was fleeting, but the intensity of such emotion had You tense defensively.

“Dia-san is with Yoshiko-chan.”

Ruby started trembling so Hanamaru gently held her hands, the gesture so drastically different than her vicious glare towards the older girl.

“Yo…shiko?” You was distinctly aware of her own heart pounding within her ribcage, like a trapped beast frantically trying to break free. Yohane… Yoshiko… Tsushima Yoshiko?

“Yoshiko-chan is still in a coma,” Hanamaru whispered darkly. “So perhaps you’ve been hallucinating, or you just have a sick sense of humor. Whatever it is, please stop it. It’s just us left now, Ruby-chan and I. The moment you even attempt to hurt Ruby-chan, I swear you will be begging for death the moment I’m done with you.”

Such savage words sounded so uncharacteristic and outlandish from a petite girl, let alone someone like Hanamaru. Yohane’s friend was usually smiling, playfully berating the gothic girl’s antics and cuddling Ruby.

That Hanamaru would never hurt a fly. The brunette here though would follow through with her threat, word for word.

You felt sick.

Back at the warehouse, back in the hallways of the hospital, and countless other times, she has been talking to thin air? But Yohane had replied to her. Or was it her own conscience, taking the form of the girl she considered trustworthy?

“Onee-chan is wholly devoted to Yoshiko-chan now.”

Both Hanamaru and You’s eyes widened as they looked at Ruby, whose expression was serene and somehow that sent a chill down You’s limbs.

“I loved her, you know? Yoshiko-chan. But I’ve been useless and I’m scared of facing her again,” Ruby was smiling. “Maru-chan too. Maru-chan loved Onee-chan, ne?”

Hanamaru cringed, her carefully controlled expression crumbling to that of pain. “That’s-”

“It’s okay. I know. That’s from before. We have each other now and that’s all that matters,” Ruby held up the brunette’s hand and interlaced their fingers, the gesture full of tenderness that it inexplicably frightened You even more. “Even then, I still wish we could go back, back to the way everything used to be.”

“That’s the one wish I cannot help you with, Ruby-chan,” Hanamaru pulled her hand away, her eyes churning with raw emotions. “Like what Kanan-chan said, it’s just a nightmare, one that none of us can ever wake up from.”

Ruby nodded slowly, her lips pressed in a thin line while her expression returned to that unnerving, vacant one like before.

It took a moment for You to realize she was covered in cold sweat. She wiped at her damp brow with her forearm and almost tripped in her haste to stand up.

“I-I’m going to g-go see Riko-chan. She… She can help me, yeah. She always has.”

Hanamaru stared at her coolly and gestured at the trees on the other side of the field. “We just went to see her. She’s over there.”

You staggered away as fast as her failing legs could bring her. She knew there was a hidden entrance to the park in that direction. She didn’t usually take this path, as it was covered with undergrowth which made it annoying to walk through. However she used to be familiar with the area, as it granted its visitors privacy and a natural veil of filtered lights from the canopy tops. Riko loved sketching here.

And this is where I…

She stumbled out of the woods and found the small gate that faced the intersection of a busy street. Gasping for breaths, she stood still and stared at the ponytailed girl crouched beside the dilapidated fence.

Kanan was holding a bouquet of roses, tears sliding down her cheeks and raining upon a withered wreath against the corner. She gingerly placed the bouquet beside a photo frame, her lips moving with whispered words.

You found it excruciating to breathe, her heart aching like someone had clenched it tight in their grip.

Kanan stood up listlessly and looked at You with dead eyes.

“I’m going to set things right.”

#athyra writes #Daydream Warrior AU #youriko maruby #but also diamaru yoshiruby kanariko I suppose #gawd this story is so messed up sometimes I wonder why I even...#XD;;;;#but hey at least #climax coming up!#3 more fragments to go!#I had to rewrite this one several times ~_~#just to get the tone right #in the end settled with this mirror image 030/#cuz of the maruby bridge from the song #but yeah I had this in my draft since July #loool uncertain about uploading it #but since I’m on vacation #*tosses this #just so I have so original content/fanwork here #schedule upload

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