#like the actual worst app ever i want it shut down

[hyunnie04]

cat and mouse

summary: your co-worker has been on your case ever since you've started your time at the company. a strange turn of events and circumstance changes all that.

pairing: coworker! lee know x reader

trope: enemies to lovers <3, office au

genre: slight angst, smut, and fluff

warnings: fem-bodied reader, oral, creampie, overstim, unprotected sex, bulge kink, spitting, etc. 18+ mdni

word count: 9.8k

a/n: a little practice piece for you guys, i hope i did well;; so sorry this took me so long to write :( i also hope it's cohesive enough, i keep writing this fic on and off sleep deprived lol

-

tick…

tock…

tick…

to-

“the clock isn’t going to speed up just because you keep staring at it.” the cubicle beside you chirps in, momentarily shaking you out of your thoughts. by now, you’ve trained to pay him no mind as you keep your focus on the clock that reads 4:56 pm, almost taunting you in a way. 

a few more minutes and you’ll be home free for the weekend. maybe you can finally relax and get away from your dreaded paperwork. perhaps look through your shopping apps since you had nothing else better to do for the weekend, or better yet- you could run a well deserved bath with that bath bomb you always wanted to use but never got a chance to. all the possibilities sounded heavenly although all that would have to actually wait until you get home.

one other thing that you had been anticipating all day was having that dinner after work with jeongin- your close friend and coworker from a different department. he had been begging you for ages to finally try that one soba place that opened up nearby with him. you being a good friend, agreed.

“you might actually melt the clock if you keep doing that y’know.” your cubicle neighbor- lee minho smirks, now standing and leaning over your workspace.

"what do you want?" pointedly asking him.

"oh, nothing. nothing."

“you just don’t ever shut up, do you?” you deadpan and tilt your chin up to stare at him, minho just offers a sly smirk in return. he always liked to bother and butt into your business for some odd reason. 

minho shrugs, “it’s fun teasing you. you do that thing where you scrunch your nose when you get riled up.” a vain visibly pops up from your forehead, but turn to your computer, hoping to drown him out with your typing.

you knew better than to give him a reaction. if you had a penny for how many times that particular vein popped from your forehead because of minho, you’d probably be a millionaire by now.

“oh, one more thing-” the brown haired man saunters back to his desk, and comes back to yours with a huge stack of papers. he unceremoniously plops it down, the annoying feline-like grin on his face. 

“what’s…this?” raising an eyebrow at him, you hope it's not what you think he's planning. you have plans. he crosses his arms and pushes his framed glasses back.

“paperwork, of course.” you wanted to strangle him. “yes, i’m well aware that this is paperwork. why is it now on my desk?”

before you could protest any further, “they want this finished by next week.” he leans to practically whisper in your ear. minho grins mischievously after he sees your pink flustered face take a step back.

the humongous stack was already on his desk, so your boss most likely assigned it to him in the first place. you furrow your eyebrows and turn to him, worst fear coming true.

"ohh no. not in a million years." you get up from your seat, avoiding the offending pile. he starts going back to his desk, neatly placing his things in it's organizers.

“why can’t you finish it? you- what are you doing?” but minho was already grabbing his bag and blazer and looking at his wrist watch.

“would you look at the time- thanks for covering for me!” aaaand he's gone.

plopping down on your chair, you bury your face in your hands, stopping yourself from pulling out hair. frustration creases on your forehead. well, you could kiss that dinner with jeongin goodbye. now you definitely want to strangle him.

-

lee minho. if you were to find a personification of the word annoying, the brunette would certainly be it. that man has done nothing but annoy the hell out of you ever since you started your time in the company. other people in your department often regarded him as one of the most reliable and polite employees here.

you would inwardly scoff at the frequent mention of minho and his apparent “reliable-ness and politeness” since all he was, was just the opposite. to you at least. it was hard to believe at first. 

but then you actually saw the way he carried himself with effortlessness and composure, handled business affairs, and how he mingled so seamlessly with fellow colleagues. it was nothing short of professional.

so you had a theory that he was only like that towards you. a complete dick only to you. you although weren’t quite sure why.

the girls in your department would often talk about him as well, mostly for his appearance. you really weren’t one for gossiping but you would listen in sometimes, curious about what they see in him. it was hard not to when they would gush about their workplace crushes and love lives so openly, a tinge of envy seeps through your bones every time it would be mentioned. you have got to get laid one day.

“he’s totally my type, you think i should ask him out?” your other cubicle neighbor says quite loudly during her break. her friend beside her shakes their head, “no, no you can’t.”

“why not? isn't he hot and available?” she asks absentmindedly. you start to zone out for a minute, only catching bits and pieces of their conversation. but you contemplate about what she said for a second, you would be lying if you said that lee minho was unattractive.

far from that actually. distinctly remembering catching a few glimpses of him from your first day, intrigued and interest piqued. his sharp nose and cheek bones, features were like sculpted by michaelangelo himself, his toned and lean figure accentuated by the perfectly well fit suit that he always seem to wear.

you definitely found him attractive at first.

that was until he started annoying you, so all of that was quickly out the window.

but you would probably end yourself before admitting that to anyone. you let out a disgruntled sigh, appearance wouldn’t really matter if he wasn’t such a knob to begin with. 

as you approached your dimly lit street, all you could think about was that feline faced jerk. what was he thinking, dumping all that work on you last minute? you felt really bad about cancelling on jeongin, texting him earlier about the sudden change of schedule. the dark haired man you've come to know just replies with a little;

'we'll just try again next week lol'

you breathe out a relieved sigh, thankful that he wasn't mad. kicking the pebbles on the side of the road, you imagined that the little rocks were minho's face. you could not wait until you get home.

“stupid paperwork, stupid minho, stupid…” 

your muttering fades and you suddenly stop in your tracks as your elderly neighbor waves you over from her front door, grandma lee or just grandma- as she insists you call her instead.

you bowed and greeted her, “hi grandma, did you need something?” you were quite close with the sweet old lady, her gray hair swaying lightly in the wind.

the elder would often check up on you after hearing that you traveled all the way from your hometown to the city, almost taking you in as her own. you were grateful for the company since homesickness would often creep up. she would also often bring you comically large jars of kimchi which you appreciated greatly.

she smiles as she gestures to the multiple bags she was holding, "i just need a little help getting these inside the house, dear." you take the heavy bags from her hands. what were in these, rocks? grandma claps her hands together in remembrance.

“have you had dinner yet? i made extra.”

-

grandma sets a bowl in front of you, the sight of seaweed soup instantly brings you comfort. your stomach grumbles as you dig in. she watches you intently as you practically inhale the soup, starved from the long and terrible day you had.

you sent her a polite questioning look. “i want to ask you for a favor.” she finally starts, flicking through the channels of her tv. the weather was on, the forecaster droning on about rain happening this week in the same monotone voice for the past 10 minutes. you look at her and nod immediately, she had done so much for you, doing a few favors aren't going to hurt.

“do you have a car, dear?”

blowing on the steaming hot seaweed soup, you nod again at her question, wondering where this conversation is heading.

“i need someone to drive me to my son’s house tomorrow, i'm staying over there for the weekend and my bags are a little heavy. would that be alright with you, dear?” you’ve heard about her family from her stories when she would have you over like now, little bits and pieces. you smile and agree.

a cheshire grin graces your features after a moment.  “what’s in it for me?” it was a joke of course, grandma knew it too. having spent a large amount of time with her, your humor must’ve rubbed off at some point.

you didn’t expect her to actually answer but she replies, “actually, i’d like you to meet my grandson as well. i think you two would get along. he's the same age as you too.”

the aforementioned grandson was someone you’ve seen in a bunch of grandma lee’s hallway pictures. you remember that he was an only child, often the only kid and the lone subject in the photos. your favorite was the kid in red with a toothy grin. he must’ve been 5 when it was taken.

"it was a joke, grandma. i'm sure your grandson wouldn't want a stranger suddenly coming to meet him." she shakes her head,

"nonsense. that boy doesn't know what he wants." you laugh at her persistence. getting another bowl of rice, you ponder her offer for a second. maybe this could finally cure your dull and dry love life, it couldn't hurt to try. if worse comes to worst, you could just pretend it never happened.

“but of course, i’ll drive you there. i have nothing to do anyways.” you say with a mouthful of rice. grandma pats you on the back and continues to flick through the channels once more.

“thank you dear.”

-

the sunset blears through your windshield, sun rays momentarily blinding you. it was clear as day. the ride to her family’s house was relatively quiet, the elderly lady in your passenger seat preferred to sleep the whole ride through after handing you the address, giving you a moment to leave you in your thoughts.

pulling up to the neighborhood, you let out a low whistle. the house was at the end of the street, steep and uphill. it was surely going to be a struggle to get the car way up there.

you get to the curb, reverse and try to park your car as best as you can. the house was really pretty, you thought. it looked pretty lived in too, but in a cozy way. vines was sprawled all over the brick exterior and flowers had bloomed all over the property.

you wake up grandma and start to haul her luggage up and out the car.

"you go up, grandma. i'll catch up."

after struggling to get the multiple bags of luggage up hill, you finally waddle to the front door. the door was left slightly ajar, probably for your convenience. you took a quick peek around, hoping for someone to let you in.

calling out before entering, you were met with silence. you figured they were too busy catching up so you eventually let yourself in.

the furniture adorning the hallway and rooms were made out of wood, the handiwork and craftsmanship was evident, intricate carvings on each and every one of them. it must’ve been made by grandma lee’s son as you’ve heard from her many stories.

a ginger cat with white stripes greets you as you enter the front door, it strides over to you in intrigue. leaning down and dropping grandma's bags gently, you let the feline sniff your hand before allowing itself to be pet. soon enough it starts rubbing its body on your legs and purring loudly. adorable cat, you thought.

silence fills the house, aside from the soft chatter coming from the other side of the wall. the cat leaves it's spot, not wanting to be pet anymore. you sit up and observe the house again, noticing a myriad of family photos adorning the walls and some of the tables.

coming closer to one of the pictures, again, you encounter the same young boy in red but this time he was wearing a cap sideways and a puffer jacket that seemed to be way too big for him.

"hello! you must be y/n!" a feminine voice suddenly calls out from the living room. you straighten your back from the mention of your name, hoping she didn't catch you closely staring at their personal and probably private photos. grandma lee comes out from the living room as well and walks towards you with a younger and kind looking woman in tow. she had another cat in her arms, this time it's coat was gray with dark streaks.

you smile and greet her politely, exchanging pleasantries. you quietly pick up the neglected bags and place them near the guest room. they continue their conversation with each other from before, you now awkwardly standing in the middle. looking at your wrist watch, you figured you should probably head on home.

"i suppose i'll get going now, it was really nice meeting you." mrs. lee looked startled at your sudden announcement.

"why don't you stay for a while? it must've been a long drive here, you're probably hungry." these two women weren't related by blood but they practically were, having the same idea when it came to hospitality.

"well, i don't want to overstay my welcome. i'm just here to give grandma a ride." smoothening out your non-existent clothes wrinkles in apprehension.

she waves her hand in dismissal, "but you must stay, you're already here anyways." she grins and pats your back. mrs. lee didn't seem to budge at your refusal.

you relented, finally accepting her offer. "my son is in the kitchen whipping something up. he's a great cook." you totally forgot about her son being actually here. the joke offer from yesterday completely forgotten and flew out of your mind. slight embarrassment runs through you, realizing that the offer was somewhat serious. you would surely need to mentally prep yourself for more socialization than you've anticipated.

but you instantly believe her claim that her son was a great cook, the amazing and aromatic smell of what seems to be steak and multiple herbs and spices from the kitchen wafts through out the entire house.

"okay- while we're waiting," mrs. lee gestures for you to take a seat, "you should go sit on the couch, y/n. i've been dying to meet you."

she hands you a mug of hot tea and sits down next to you. "mom here talks about you all the time, thank you for keeping her company."

"it's no problem at all, i like her company too." and with that, the three of you fall into a smooth and comfortable rhythm of conversation. the younger of the two women across from you continues to poke and prod into life, not that you minded. she would ask you about your life, where were you from, where you went to school, and where you went to work and among other things.

she offers you stories of her son gleefully in return, laughing about a particularly embarrassing story when he was younger. you learned that he was quite fond and talented in dancing, loves cats, and loves to cook. oddly enough mrs. lee never mentioned his name at all, you didn't want to pry. now that you've thought about it, grandma hadn't mentioned his name at all either. all you had for a lead was initials you remember seeing etched on one of grandma's photos. you figured you'd meet this person soon enough anyways.

after a while, grandma lee retreats to the guest room they've set up, assuming that she'd want to fix her belongings. mrs. lee starts to drag you around the house, urging you to help her set the plates up and talk more while doing so. midway through placing the chopsticks on the table, the sound of pots and pans clanging from the other room shakes you out of your thoughts.

"mom?" a voice calls out from their kitchen. it must be her son. you slightly raise your eyebrows, he sounds oddly familiar but you can't place your finger who he might've sounded like. you quickly brush it off.

"yes?"

"have you seen the slow cooker?" the man finally reveals himself and pokes his head through the entryway to the kitchen.

you lift your head and lock eyes with the said person. shock freezes your movements, dropping the utensils that you were holding. blinking owlishly in surprise, you weren't sure if what you were seeing was real.

you feel the wind knock out of your lungs. this was not happening. the brown eyes, brown hair, and cat like face from work that you've come to dislike stared back. you must be hallucinating.

standing across from you was lee minho, the lee minho. grandma lee’s grandson. the same one that's been tormenting you all year round. you just couldn't believe it, wondering what kind of luck you had to end up here.

you think back to when you looking (--more like snooping) at grandma lee's framed hallway photos, the kid- that was him all along? you're really bad at recognizing faces, you thought to yourself. well, she certainly made him seem like a complete angel from the stories.

"oh! this is y/n. your grandmother invited her to eat dinner with us." mrs. lee pulls your figure closer into a side hug and beams at her son.

he furrows his eyebrows at you, glancing back and forth at you and his mother. he must be as confused and shocked as you are. "hi." minho says, nodding at your direction. you purse your lips and shuffle uncomfortably in place.

minho again asks where the slow cooker was since the first time he asked was ignored. he was wearing a loose fitting shirt, his broad shoulders looking more prominent. you realize you've never seen him outside of his work attire before. he looked comfortable, domestic even.

his mom says to check the cupboards, paying him no mind and continuing to set the table up. minho nods slowly, eyes not leaving yours and heads back to the kitchen. a little shell shocked about your little encounter, you clear your throat and go back to the task at hand. you'd just have to deal with this for the evening and then you could go home.

when the table was done, mrs. lee turns to you, "y/n? would you mind helping minho over there with bringing the side dishes to the table?" you freeze at the realization that you would have to interact with him alone.

"sure." you say meekly. she thanks you and goes to the guest room to presumably get the older lady for dinner. psyching your self up before entering the kitchen, his broad back facing you. he senses your presence and chuckles.

you were sure he was going to make this whole night unbearable.

"well, this is a nice surprise."

"what are you doing here?" stupid question from you seeing as this was his own house. mentally face palming your head, he hums smugly and starts dividing the side dishes onto smaller plates. you notice his very toned arms flexing as he puts the tubs away.

"i should be asking you that. i didn't expect you to be here." he says nonchalantly, but you could feel a sly smile forming on his face as he speaks.

"neither did i." you grumble and lightly shove him aside, wanting to get the side dishes out to the table already. you ignore the way he looks so domestic right now.

-

you stare at him from directly across the table, hoping he would keep his mouth shut. he smirks while he eats, purposefully riling you up and glancing at you with a knowing grin.

do not lose your cool, y/n.

silence rings out the dining room aside from the quiet clattering of utensils on plates.

"y/n?"

"i'm sorry?" you snap out of your little less than friendly staring contest with him.

"do... you know each other?" his mother finally breaks the silence and here eyes flickers back and forth between both of you.

"yes-"

"no-"

a full on headache is surely forming now, it's going to be hard to hide your annoyance. quick, think of a lie.

"we're coworkers. same company." you grimace as he answers for the both of you. no use in hiding it now. "oh! that's wonderful." the older lady to your right clasps her hands in delight.

"you didn't tell me you worked together." grandma turns to you grinning brightly. you avoid eye contact with her, nodding and forcing out a smile. you wanted nothing more than want the ground to swallow you up right then and there.

"you two must be close." his mother says, sipping at her drink. you were about to open your mouth to say that you really aren't actually, but minho beats you to the punch.

"we kind of are." minho rests his elbows on the table and turns to you. he's enjoying this. the bastard was enjoying this. resisting the urge to roll your eyes, you turn back to finish your meal.

hatred for the man aside, he really was a great cook as mentioned countless of times. you actually find yourself enjoying the meal he had prepared.

"tell me what you two get up to at work, i want to hear all of it."

you shift uncomfortably in your seat, being honest wouldn't be the best idea. you didn't want these two lovely women to know how much of an unpleasant man their son and grandson is. and it was his house after all, the best decision might be to at least be civil with him.

so you play along with his facade, not wanting to disappoint them even if it was probably going to bite you in the ass later.

minho starts cutting the meat up into bite sized pieces while the conversation between the two ladies continue. he places it on your plate without saying anything. this takes you by surprise, looking at his face for an answer.

the two audience members among the dining table seems to have noticed your little exchange. a wrinkly hand touches over yours catches your attention.

"oh, so are you two..." she trails off, implication heavy on her tone.

"no- no, grandma. i told you i wasn't seeing anyone." you shoot a discrete glare towards minho.

"ah, i see..."

you shrink down your seat for the remainder of the hour, embarrassment flooding your being. why did he have to do that? you were already practically fighting for your life not to get too involved with all this, and he pulls that?

after that very eventful dinner, it was already nearing 8 pm. you figured that you should probably get out of their hair, not wanting to disturb them than you already had. that bubble bath and movie marathon you had planned in your head sounded amazing right about now. maybe that would help you forget about this crazy night.

"grandma," she turns in response, "i think i better get going." you smile at her, digging through your pockets for the car keys. a different cat from the other two that you've met takes long strides, stopping by your feet. you greet it by petting it's head gently. you wondered how many cats they have.

"now? look at the weather dear," you look briefly at the window nearest you, surely enough it was heavily pouring. you deflate at the sight.

"i don't think it's a great idea to drive out in a storm." she looks at you in concern. crap. the conversation at dinner must've carried you away, not even noticing the angry rumble of thunder that came from the sky. she was right, you don't think you could drive out there immediately.

the last time you drove into hard pelting rain, you couldn’t see through the windshield and almost crashed your car in the process. you could still remember how your car swerved and screeched when you couldn't control the way the tires' direction.

reluctantly dropping your hands to your side in defeat, "i guess i can wait it out for a bit." you finally say.

"yes, please do stay. we made extra dessert!" mrs. lee chuckles, seemingly enjoying your presence. glancing at minho, he was leaning on the side of the couch watching the exchange between you three, uncharacteristically silent and expression unreadable.

you reckon he wasn't all that thrilled about the whole thing either.

-

"the storm isn't letting up." minho sighs next to you, observing the dark and heavy rain pelting the window. it continues to pour down, filing in the silence.

"great." you mumble lowly, crossing your arms. a loud cackle of thunder makes you jump from your spot. he just laughs in response. you could feel your heart pounding out of your chest, anxiety quietly eating at you. damn weather man. you should've paid more attention to the forecast.

the smart watch on your wrist flashes with a notification. it was 11 pm now. "you should stay until tomorrow, dear."

you feel a comforting hand on your back, it was mrs. lee. it was only her staying with you two right now since grandma had already retired back to her room.

"tomorrow? oh, i- uh... i don't want to intrude." you stutter and look down, unsure how to accept her offer. but as much as you wanted to turn her down, you knew deep down you don't really have a choice in the matter.

another strike of thunder confirms your pitiful situation.

"i know what you're thinking, you can take minho's room." her words take you aback, that really wasn't what you were thinking. but she wasn't serious, was she?

at the mention of his name and apparent lending of his own bed, he whips his head towards his mother. he points to himself silently and gawks in disbelief.

you try to stifle a laugh at his ridiculous face. it wasn't often that you see minho all flustered.

realizing that mrs. lee might actually kick minho out of his room if you don't say anything, you decide to spare him. "that's okay, i'll take the couch."

"are you sure? the couch isn't the most comfortable..."

you reassure her that the couch is fine and not to worry. mrs. lee takes this as a confirmation that you'll stay for the night. she beams and grabs her son's shoulder,

"minho, do you have clothes that you can lend to y/n?" she catches you about to protest at the unnecessary offer, "don't worry about that, you're going to end up uncomfortable if you sleep in your clothes right now."

she leaves not long after with a quick good night to you both, also not leaving any room for any counter arguments. minho nods after registering what she said, hesitantly gesturing you to follow him towards the room at the end of the corridor.

he was quiet these past few hours, you observed. the annoying minho that you have gotten used to was no where to be found. putting yourself in his shoes, you understood. having a person that you dislike come into your home and spend the night would irk you as well.

the unexpected warm lighting and a subtle citrus scent with notes of jasmine and sandalwood welcomed you upon entering. it instantly brings comfort. not really expecting anything coming into his room, it was truly a pleasant surprise.

you stand awkwardly in the middle of his room, not wanting to touch or disrupt any of his space or belongings. he heads straight to his closet near his bed.

"it's alright, uh..."

minho ignores your attempt to refuse and starts digging deep for clothes that he could lend.

okay, nevermind.

you quietly glance at the homey decor that adorns the wall of his bedroom. multiple pictures of what you assume to be his friends were strewn all across the room. some of them seemed to be taken when he was in high school and some more recent. there were doing various funny and serious poses, minho seems to be really well liked.

"alright,"

he starts handing you a pair of black jogging pants and a plain white t-shirt. you reluctantly take the pile of clothes from him, your fingers momentarily brushing. you were certain you could hear your pulse thump in your ears. it confuses you greatly.

"this is the smallest one i have, sorry."

he coughs and rubs his neck, "the bathroom is over there, if you wanna change."

awkwardly shuffling on the way to the bathroom, a sigh of relief leaves your mouth as you lock the door behind. why were you so affected by a simple touch of his fingers? this was minho. you quickly shove the odd feeling down.

you hold the white shirt up to your torso, it was definitely too big. the hem of the shirt reaching your thighs and sleeves reaching your elbows as well.

peeling out of your clothes, and hold up minho's large shirt to finally wear. as you put it on, you could faintly smell the cleanness of detergent and a faint musky patchouli scent. your cheeks burn with the realization that you were really going to spend the night here.

when you return to the empty main corridor, the leather couch was already set up with a cozy looking blanket and multiple plush pillows. you struggle to hide a smile.

-

tossing and turning, you struggle to find a comfortable position on the couch. the blanket proving to be too hot right now, you push it off. you check your phone out of boredom and the led screen lights up.

1:19 am. it was in the middle of the night and the rain continues to pour outside. the occasional rumble of thunder once again evoking anxiety in you. sighing, you don't think you will be getting any sleep tonight. it's just you and your thoughts for now.

thinking back to this afternoon, the whole situation seems so absurd and surreal. who would've thought that you and minho would pretend being friends even if it was just for one night. it was a strange chance of circumstance.

the door from the end of hallway opens, a scruffy and disheveled minho rubs his eyes to get rid of his sleepiness. you sit up in curiosity to observe his sleepy state. he pads over the wooden floors to the kitchen looking for water, not sparing you a second glance.

when he was out of sight, you start thinking of ways to distract yourself, wanting to already succumb to slumber.

“oh, it’s you.” he says after coming back, finally noticing your slumped figure. "didn't sleep yet?" minho ruffles his hair haphazardly, trying to smoothen it down. you shake your head,

"insomnia. it's the thunder."

"ah."

"the couch is making your neck hurt isn't it?"

"yeah, that too."

he opens his mouth to hopefully offer another solution, but shuts it immediately. he wasn't sure if it would make you comfortable so he just stands there quietly.

"i'll go get you more pillows." he places his cup down on the coffee table before going to his room. minho stops in his tracks when he feels your fingers tug on his shirt. another strike of thunder flashes outside making you flinch.

"stay." you catch yourself saying before even realizing. it's selfish to ask but you don't think you could stand the thunder alone. watching him stare into your eyes, as if looking for an explanation- you offer him no words.

minho takes a seat at the end of the couch silently joining you, sipping at his mug. to fill the awkward silence, you clear your throat and fiddle with the ends of the cotton blanket.

you start thinking of ways to justify your selfish request of making him stay.

"i finished that damn paperwork you dumped on me. dick move by the way." you chortled to try to lighten the mood. he seems to notice your attempts to distract yourself and indulge your sudden desire to chat.

he folds his hands on his stomach, grinning. his bunny like teeth poking out. you always thought it was endearing. "it's fun seeing you all grumpy."

"sadist." you simper, the anger you felt from a yesterday dwindling at the surprisingly pleasant banter.

quietness takes over again. he stares into the celling, pondering. "i didn't know you were close with my grandmother." he says after a while. he avoids your gaze and places his mug back on the table.

"neither did i. it wasn't deliberate," you reply. he turns to you, curious about the story. so you explain to him how you met, for how long and that you didn't even recognize him despite seeing the photos.

he chuckles, "i bet it was this pose, wasn't it?" minho imitates the very same pose that he did in the photo, eliciting another laugh from you. it was exactly the same.

minho shuffles a little bit closer to you, now propping his arm on the back of the couch. you straighten up, now being hyperaware of his presence and proximity. he looks really different without his glasses.

a furry tail suddenly brushes against your exposed leg. you lean forward to check what had just rubbed past you, it was one of the cats. it meows for attention, pawing at the base of the couch.

"your cats are really cute." you watch him pick the orange haired feline and place it on his lap. one by one, two of the other cats that you've seen this afternoon start padding over to where you and minho were seated, jumping on the couch.

"that's dori," he points to the gray furred kitty. "doongie," an orange cat with a predominately white underbelly, "and soonie." the last one who's also orange but more so than the other. minho raises soonie's paw, waving it at you. cute.

"this one looks like you."

you scratch soonie's chin, the low purring getting louder the longer you do it. minho stares longingly at your eyes with an unreadable expression at the comment. you're not paying any attention to him.

after a while, the cats start to get tired of the two of you. they walk of to the end of the couch, now ignoring you and minho. you fold your arms and relaxing into the back of the couch, falling into a deep and comfortable silence that would be sorely missed.

"why do you hate me?" you say abruptly. the curiosity finally won, anxiety gnawing at your every fiber of your being. it was finally starting to be peaceful between you two and actually talking like normal people, your sudden comment might've affected it's chances of becoming true.

his head whips towards your direction in what you assume to be disbelief, furrowing his eyebrows. "since when did i hate you?"

you struggle to not scoff at his blatant charade, "minho, you have it out for me." this was strange and ridiculous. was he really being serious? how could he not be aware of the months of months of his incessant attitude towards you, and only you.

you remind yourself to be calm, to be civil. but he continues to feign ignorance. it was starting to get difficult.

"you don't treat me like the others, you constantly make my life harder by teasing me, and you dump your own paperwork on me. only me. the only time you talked to me normally was just a few minutes ago." your voice rising with exasperation.

"what did i do?" voice ultimately faltering, tired.

"i-..." minho refuses to meet your eyes, offering no solace.

instantly feeling vulnerable by your little outburst and by the lack of response on his end, you hug and bury the plush pillow for comfort. you wanted to go home. you wanted to go home and pretend this conversation did not happen. confrontation wasn't your strong suit.

after a long while of silence, he at last utters a low, "i'm so sorry."

"that was very, very stupid of me." minho's eyes are now trained on the hardwood floor, unable to even glance at you.

"what? the paperwork?" you scoff, "no, not just that. all of it."

you furrow your brows at him, "i just find you really really cute when you're mad." he continues. you stare at him, incredulousness and anger painting your features. before you could give him a piece of your mind, he speaks.

"and i realized i didn't know how to actually approach you normally without the teasing." he purses his lips, the cup on the table long forgotten. minho is staring up the celling now, still refusing to look to your direction.

"would you also believe me if i said i was jealous?"

you don't know what to say in return, heavily processing what he just said. what was happening? your mouth runs dry, confusion knocking the wind out of you.

"of your friend." he says, emphasizing the last part. you try to rack your brain of who he was referring to.

"jeongin?" you tilt your head. he says nothing, confirming the assumption. "i overheard him talking to his friends, bragging about how he was gonna take you out to this restaurant that he wants to drag you to." you couldn't possibly think of a reason why he would be jealous, you and jeongin are just friends. and why was he jealous in the first place?

"why are you so worked up about it? he's just a friend, minho."

"i'm not even sure myself," minho shakes his head in exasperation and turns to you. "but i like you, y/n."

standing there, paralyzed at his unexpected confession. minho likes you? he was giving you crap all year round, and yet he likes you? you shoot him a perplexed look, "wait, what?"

"let me get this straight," you hug your legs, trying to decipher what he was saying. "so your plan was to annoy the hell out of me, dump your paperwork seeing that you don't want me hanging out with jeongin because...you like me?"

"well, now it sounds stupid when you put it like that." he huffs, crossing his arms and pouting cutely.

deafening silence falls between you two, unable to say anything meaningful without stuttering and fumbling through your words. you just sat there, not really saying anything and staring at the floor. realizing that you probably don't feel the same, he sighs. its about time he went back to bed too.

"it's late. you should probably get some-"

before you knew it you felt your pulse roaring in your ears, grabbing his wrist and stopping him from standing up. you were going to regret it if you let him go.

"i like you too."

a magnetic pull causes you both to inch closer together, wordlessly gazing into each others eyes. you make the first move to lean into him, slowly placing an experimental peck on the side of his lips. you unsurely place your hands on his chest, "is this okay?"

his eyes flickering down to your lips and then back to your eyes. he licks his lips, still staring intensely- lovingly at you. he softly grins, tucking a lock of hair behind your ears and returns the kiss on your lips.

eyelids fluttering shut, you feel him press against you with much enthusiasm, deepening the kiss. you cup his cheeks as a reply, roughly pulling him towards you.

you already forgot about the rain outside.

he hoists you up his lap, a hand on your waist as he trails desperate kisses on your neck. minho pays his attention back to your lips, sloppy and open mouthed, saliva stringing from your mouths. urgency and eagerness was reflected in the way you both tangle your arms around each other, touching and caressing every part that you could reach.

all of the unresolved tension was slowly slipping away, replaced by desire.

a sudden meow breaks the two of you out of your trance. the green eyes of soonie stares up at the two of you, sitting quietly and their tail swishing side to side.

you loosen your arms around his neck, you two bursting out in laughter at the interruption.

"do you want to maybe take this to my room?" minho asks, placing a thumb on your lips. you didn't need to think twice.

-

your head hit his plush pillow, the cold and crisp linen feeling heavenly against your hot and flushed skin. shuffling up to the headboard, you watch minho with hazy eyes as he inches towards your form and props his knee on the edge of the bed.

he smirks as he sinks down on the mattress, hovering over your feverish body. minho sneaks a hand behind your back, grabbing you by the hips and flipping you over so effortlessly to the top as if you weighed nothing.

"now, where were we?" he murmurs into the column of your neck, his hot breath sending tingling and electrifying shivers down your spine. you respond by trailing your hands all over his clothed chest, wanting to get the offending article of clothing off.

he chuckles and grabs your wrists, halting you from doing so. minho kisses the inside of your wrist, a teasing smile dawns on his face. you look at him with desperate, pleading eyes, wanting to have him already.

minho adjusts his tight hold on you, biting his plush lips in anticipation. with you now towering over his figure, you lean down to capture the lips that you had been fantasizing about all evening and bury your hands into his hair. the kiss was wet and messy, your tongues sloppily and desperately swallowing each other's moans. a trail of saliva strings from both of your lips.

it was starting to get too hot for your liking. you cease your movements for a second to remove minho’s borrowed shirt from your body. minho’s eyes shamelessly rake over your chest, his finger leisurely trailing the middle of your breasts. you let out a low chuckle, finally unclasping the hook of your bra. you release a breathy shudder upon feeling something hard poking you from where you sat. grabbing both of his wrists, you eagerly put them up to your tits, you could feel your sensitive nipples harden because of his cold touch. minho starts pinching at the sensitive buds, prolonging his eye contact with you, clearly enjoying your erratic squirming.

you suck in a sharp breath and almost topple over him in pleasure as he takes a nipple into his mouth, hot, warm, and wet. it was overwhelming, having no one touch you like this before. he continues to lap at your hardening bud. minho groans, closing his eyes and further burying his head in your chest. your tits were covered in spit, glistening under the subtle light of his night lamp.

minho, while smothering himself in your chest, takes a moment to hook his arm over you. his skillful hands trail over to the waistband of your jogging pants and pulls it down. you oblige, leaning closer to him and lifting your hips so he wouldn’t have to leave your tits. you jump in surprise once you feel a light teasing smack on your now semi exposed ass, only covered by thin panties. it elicits a small moan from you, pulling his head closer. you lightly pet his head and thread your hands in his hair affectionately as he continues his sucking, feeling a coiling sensation from your core. 

but before you could cum, he detaches from your breasts, leaving his lips glistening with his own spit and his breath raggedy. a sly grin that you have come to love and hate graces his face upon seeing you whimper. the lack of stimulation makes you deflate, heaving frustratedly at his relentless teasing.

the familiar throbbing heat from your pussy suddenly gives you an idea. his hungry gaze watches you in curiosity. the bulge you were currently sitting on now immediately taking all of your attention. you do an experimental hump on it, hoping to relieve the aching heat from your cunt. minho's hands fly to your hips, groaning at the sensation.

"all this time, you made me think that you hated me-" you moan out, the fabric of his pants providing just the right amount of resistance. "when really you liked me?"

he stifles his moans by biting his bottom lip, his pants surely soaked through now.

"i did say i liked seeing you mad." minho manages to grunt out, licking his lips. you almost reel in disbelief but you keep your composure. 

"you're confusing." another thrust. 

"and i'm still mad at you." you huff out. hips now wildly humping against every ridge and curve of his cock. the sight of him makes you delirious, even more so that you’re humping against him.

"i-i'll make it up to you," he murmurs lowly, hissing the more times you buck up against him. "fu-fuck..."

despite the way that you were using him, it does nothing to quell the horniness you were feeling, in fact, it even spurs you on further. the wet patch from your panties soak and slowly transfer on to the front of his pants, your own wetness spreading messily every time you grind on his delicious dick, the ridges providing the needed friction that you've been so desperately craving. minho watches you, your tits bouncing up and down- he feels like drooling. "i love it when you use me." he finally breathes out, hands still on your hips, his nails making crescents on your skin. and finally, you cum, his words sending you over the edge.

it tremors through your body, white hot cum leaks out from your panties and you can’t seem to hold yourself up any longer, collapsing on his broad chest. you clench your eyes shut in shyness, suddenly embarrassed from using minho so blatantly. he coos and pats your head in comfort, almost like how he pets his cats.

planning to make it up to him and eat his words, you sit up and shuffle down his hips. you admire the wet patch that stains his front, mouth watering. this surprises him, watching you with tantalizing eyes. you make a move to grab at his waistband, pulling it down slowly. he hisses out in pleasure as the waistband runs over his still clothed dick. minho’s boxers were thoroughly wet, you could see a dark patch on the front where you sat on him and where precum leaked out. you lift up a hand to experimentally give his bulge a tight little squeeze, him letting out a little shudder response.

it hardens even more under your touch- so you decide to tease him to test the waters even further, running your fingers over and over his tent causing him to hiss out, sending you a warning look. taking this as a sign, you lift the waistband of his boxers and stare at his eyes while doing so. it springs up immediately after freeing it from its confines. his long and fat cock stands tall, the tip a deep red, and the veins prominently running along the sides. the sight makes your mouth water in anticipation. you place a thumb on his cockhead, running slow circles on his slit causing it to drool heavily on your hand.

his cat like mouth parts in ecstasy once you start teasing the underside of his length with your hand and licking the oozing liquid up. minho’s hips start thrusting at the sensation, forcing you to hold him down. it was admittedly hard to do so, his thick thighs almost the size of your head but you still managed to restrain him from rutting wildly. the groan that leaves his lips sound is absolutely nothing short of sinful when you finally put your mouth on him. every desperate huff from him leaves you light headed, wishing you could record and replay it over and over again. when couldn’t fit all of him, you resorted to pumping the remaining of the shaft were you couldn’t reach. you egg him on even further by running a hand over his abs, seeing how his thighs and abdomen tense up. 

you look up through your lashes to watch minho unravel. his eyes were screwed shut, focusing on the stimulation. while it bobs messily in your mouth, you try to pay special attention to his hot and heavy balls, rubbing it back and forth in the palm of your hand, hoping to get him to cum. minho closes his eyes shut again and tenses his thighs, finally cumming. his hands travel down to grasp at his length, taking it over yours, spurting his essence everywhere. minho finishes with a loud relieved groan, slapping his dick lazily against your cheek which you greedily lapped at. 

“that might be the best head i’ve ever had, bunny.” he bites his lips, his voice light and airy. you quickly sit up from your position and gawked at him, suddenly feeling bashful at his apparent pet name for you. 

minho gives you a mischievous cat like grin in return, feeling absolutely delighted at your expression. he begins to lightly graze your leg, leaving tentative touches and gentle pecks along the stretch of your lower limb. lifting your right leg up, you stop minho from inching any closer towards you by putting your foot on his chest.

"y/n..."

you pretend to think for a moment, stretching this out for as long as possible. he would just have to wait since he had yet to make up for being so mean to you. a little fun also wouldn’t hurt, right? no, you were quite wrong. 

minho again grabs your ankle albeit more roughly this time and continues to place chaste kisses with more passion this time, clearly adamant about giving your legs and thighs hickeys. at long last, minho slides the wet and abused fabric off you, the panty is thoroughly soaked and it’s material sticking and clinging to your core.

he hooks ur leg over his shoulder, urging to part your legs apart and spreading them obscenely open. staring intensely into your eyes, minho starts teasing your core with feather light touches. “you like this?” he says his mischievous grin, continuing his ministrations. you offer him no response as he traces figures and shapes on your wet pussy that has you seeing stars. his fingers now erratically sliding up and down your folds. you almost sob at his nonchalant teasing, eyes clenching shut and begging him to put something in.

something about observing his veiny hand treading lightly just the outside of your lower lips leads you to tuck your face into your hands, the sight was like straight out of porn. “no, no. hands up bunny.” minho takes a hold of your wrists, putting them effortlessly above your head. 

“you have to look.”

his free hand drags along your legs to pull them apart and starts lowering his chiseled face down to your core. his nose just close enough to feel the small exhaling puffs of hot air on your pussy, causing it to twitch in suspense. the brunette sneaks a peak at your trembling figure before diving right in, the first contact of his tongue on your cunt was searing hot, instantly making jolt out in shock and cry out. minho takes this as a sign to hold down your hips, pressing, flattening, and letting his tongue rampant against you all while avoiding your clit. he hums at the taste, huffing and delving further into your pussy, eating you out with such intensity, placing open mouthed sloppy kisses. he spits to make your pussy wetter so he could languidly and erratically make out with your cunt. 

you throw your head back into the heaps of pillows behind you as he starts to pay attention to your clit, softly biting the bundle of nerves. minho then moves to swipe his index up at the large amount of cum and spit trickling from your core, using it as lube for his fingers. he gently prods his index in your entrance all while still licking you up. his long fingers, deliciously stretching your hole, deeper than all those nights you've tried to do so yourself. the bliss you were feeling was overwhelming. minho croaks out a little ‘hah, hah, hah…” every time he would come up for breath, completely drunk off your musky and intoxicating scent. you also don’t miss how he subtly humps the bed sheets he was lying under either. you began to arch your back upon hearing his desperate sounds, your arousal spurting on his face.   

minho looks like a cat who got the cream, his pupils blown wide open and wetness trickling down the side of his mouth. he lets go of your hands after you were finished, the numb arm falling on your forehead as you catch your breath. he stands up to re-adjust your form on the bed, pulling you closer to his pelvis.

minho stares at your eyes, asking silently for permission. you look up at him with a toothy- fucked out grin. 

the feelings that you couldn't place earlier was now clear, you wanted him.

minho reaches a hand over your face, caressing your flushed cheeks. he wordlessly leans to tenderly place a kiss onto your forehead and on your lips. you reciprocate lovingly, capturing his lips once again. minho without warning, pushes his long and girthy dick into you, the abrupt intrusion making you sob out. the bulbous head of his cock rubs deliciously against your gummy walls, you swore you could feel it in your throat.

“there we go. there we go…”

minho sets a rough pace, his hips thrusting against your pelvic bone. “ah-ah!”

toned and skillful arms cage you in, forcing you to look deep into his dark pools. "you better keep quiet, or else the whole house will hear you." that for some reason makes your cunt even wetter, weeping more than you thought was possible. the sole idea of getting caught with their precious son doing such lewd acts, it seems sacrilegious and absolutely sinful.

he once again reaches for your hardened nipple, tweaking and pinching the bud between his thumb and index. the bed was now creaking with how fast minho was going, you silently prayed that no one in the house suspects anything. the thought mortifies you.

minho leans against your figure and nuzzles up on your chest, looking up at you with an oh so innocent grin while he continues to pound your cunt. his movements start to stutter once he feels your walls clench around him. your mind begins to feel like mush but you still try to make an effort to suppress your groans of pleasure. a strangled sound between a moan and a whine leaves your throat once he hits that one particular spot in you.

“keep quiet, little kitty.”

you start squirming uncontrollably at the huskiness of his voice, not having experienced an intense orgasm like this before. “cum, you can do it.” your rutting hips stop to convulse for a moment, feeling your orgasm rip through the ends of your nerves. leaning back on his chest, you struggle to catch your breath, heaving from the aftermath of your orgasm.

fogginess still clouding your vision, you caught a small glimpse of minho to notice that he still hadn’t pulled out, his hands circling your waist gently. you unintentionally clench on his cock, yep he was still hard, very hard. minho sets his eyes on you, and gives you that look. oh no, you knew that look. the same one that he uses around the office to persuade a higher up to heed to his request. you nibble on your lower lip in excitement.

“one more, you can do one more right?” he coos, lifting your legs and his hips starting his monstrous once pace again. you double over in overstimulation, crying out in pleasure. his breath hitches after a particularly hard thrust, choosing to muffle his own cries by shoving his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling your exhilarating scent. you respond by coyly playing with the hair on his nape, hoping that it would ground you to reality.

minho then sneaks a hand from below you and hugs your figure, pulling you impossibly closer. he swallows your moans, kissing you feverishly and running his hands wildly all throughout. it was so urgent, so intense, like he’s finding a way to meld your bodies together, his erratic and messy thrusts reflecting that.

your fingers clutch his thick bed sheets, euphoria piercing your body every time he drives another rough thrust into you. the lewd noises coming from the two of you echos and bounces off the walls, the conversation tomorrow morning was going to be so humiliating and awkward at the dining table.   

you can’t hold it in any longer, and by the looks of it, neither can he. minho cums with a loud groan, spurting inside you. "goooood kitty." minho rasps out. you gape at the warmness, causing you to finish as well. minho reaches his hand downwards to spread your combined release, spreading it messily. it drips out of you obscenely as he pulls out.

you were positively flushed. he was too, sweat still glistening on the wide expanse of his chest and forehead. minho brushes your hair back affectionately before plopping down tiredly next to you. you turn to him, wanting to admire his fucked out features but he looks occupied and staring into space.

“what's the matter?” 

"i really am sorry about the misunderstanding. i feel terrible that i made you feel like that. and i do really like you. wasn't lying about that." minho sighs out, closing his eyes for a moment and then faces you. “i want to start over, properly this time.”

"apology accepted. and yeah of course." you say, quite happy with how this whole misunderstanding turned out. "i really like you too." he kisses the top of your head, making you wrap an arm around him to cuddle.

"now you'll just have to figure out how to reject the girl beside your desk. she wants to ask you out."

"maybe we can start by just making out in front of her."

#stray kids smut #skz smut #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #skz scenarios #stray kids hard thoughts #lee know #lee know x reader #lee know smut #lee minho x reader #stray kids x you #stray kids angst #skz fluff #skz angst

[agustdiv1ne]

✧˖°.10:52 p.m. — choi soobin

genre: fluff, college au, a couple of introverts at a party LOL

wc: 1.2k

soobin isn't particularly fond of parties.

it's something that he’s made abundantly clear — raucous music results in a miserable headache; cramped, sweaty crowds cause his heart to pound and his stomach to twist in the worst way. soobin despises parties, really. his housemate, yeonjun, is more than well aware after soobin yelled at him the first time he threw one of the impromptu variety. the question is: does yeonjun care?

another bass-boosted edm song rattles the entire house. soobin gets his answer.

he drags a pillow over his face with an exasperated groan. there seems to be no sign of this particular party ending any time soon, much to his own displeasure. he purses his lips, sits up, and grabs his phone from the nightstand next to his bed. it looks like he won’t be getting much sleep tonight.

the rest of his room remains relatively dark while he cycles through the myriad of apps on his phone, yet none of them keep his attention for very long. he’s engrossed in a youtube video about some dog when his door swings open with a flourish of light and a wall of sound before promptly slamming shut. heart racing, he watches a complete stranger slide down his bedroom door with their face buried in their hands.

unsure of what to do, he sits frozen on his bed, staring down at your curled up form. he hears an almost inaudible sniffle come from you, a shock of concern shooting down his spine. though his mouth falls agape, he pauses before words can escape.

his eyes widen and his stomach flips when he realizes it's you — not a stranger, but, in soobin's eyes, something much worse: his pathetically long-term, same-major-as-him crush. what's worse: you barely know him, only ever having brief conversations in class if absolutely forced to. you've had more than a few classes together, sitting near each other but never too close. he finds it difficult to strike up conversation with you when you seem just as reserved as him.

despite it all, vines began to curl around his heart, squeezing every time he would see you, or speak a few words to you, even if those words simply pertained to an assignment. even now, those feelings don't seem to want to recede. though quiet, he's found you to be kind, bright, your smile lighting up his heart in a way that he's never felt before. again, he thinks of himself as pitiful, knowing that there is a slim to none chance of you ever getting together due to his own insecurities.

another one of your sniffles, louder now, shakes him from his thoughts. he gulps, steeling himself, and says, “are you okay?”

you flinch, and panic singes his nerves. he doesn’t even realize that you’ve stood up, spouting apologies as your hand shoots for the doorknob. “i didn’t realize i wasn’t alone, i’m s—”

“w-wait!” he interrupts. your movements halt as you stare at him for a second, regarding him with an odd expression painted on your face. a beat of silence passes, two, as you stare at each other. he notices the sheen of tears that line your waterline despite the dimness of the room. it makes you look prettier, somehow — like dewdrops clinging onto spiderwebs.

“really, are you okay?” he tries again, praying that you don’t try to bolt this time. he’s nearly ready to jump out of his own skin when you choke a sob down.

“i…” you trail off for a moment, wringing your fingers. you look around his room, avoiding eye contact now, blinking away the tears. “yeah, um, i guess. just a little overwhelmed right now.”

your face twists in confusion for a moment before you speak again. “you’re…you’re soobin, right?”

jumping at the sound of his name passing your lips, he scrambles to respond as nonchalantly as possible. “yeah! yeah, that’s me. um, we have a class together, right?” 

“a few classes, actually,” you answer a little too quickly, gaze finding the floor. the smile you wear doesn’t quite reach your eyes. you offer him your name, but he replies that he already knows. “well, um, it’s nice to formally meet you, despite the circumstances.”

“same here,” he says, ignoring the frenzied beating of his heart. he never thought this would ever happen — you, standing in his room and actually talking to him. he sees you shuffling back towards the door, and his lips purse for a second. should he?

(you look about ready to say goodbye, but he's not sure when he'll ever be able to talk to you again.

he should.)

“um, if you’d like to chill in here for a bit, feel free. i mean! you don’t have to, but um—”

your giggle has the words fading from his tongue in an instant. "thanks, but i wouldn't wanna intrude."

“you wouldn’t!” he exclaims, cringing at his voice’s volume. “you wouldn’t. you don’t really seem like the rager type.”

“i’m not,” you agree, moving closer to him. he moves to switch a light on, and when he looks back, you stand at the foot of his bed, front teeth worrying your bottom lip. “you mind if i, um, sit on your bed?”

“not at all,” he says, but he does, he so does. he thinks that he might just pass out at this rate, but as you begin talking — everything from classes and favorite colors to what you dream about for your futures, you moving closer until your sitting knee-to-knee — he somehow begins to relax.

you lean closer in a moment of boldness, asking if he'd like to hang out sometime, just the two of you. he finds himself admiring your lips, the urge to kiss you unable to win over his logical mind. he wants to take things slow with you, find out all of your little quirks, your likes and dislikes, the way you like your coffee, if you even like coffee. he wants to believe that maybe, just maybe, you like him back when you grin at his acceptance.

the mirage of peace is broken by a ding! from your phone, your friend telling you that she's ready to go and where the hell are you? you literally disappeared. you sigh, apologizing, as you rise from his comforter. he stands up to walk you out, and you turn around as you exit his room, him leaning against the doorframe.

“if you ever come to another of yeonjun’s parties, you know where to find me,” soobin jokes, causing you to smile. you tell him you would, and that you’re looking forward to your classes together on monday. you leave with a gentle squeeze of your hand entangled in his and a demure smile, and he watches you disappear down the stairs before his door clicks shut.

collapsing back onto his bed, soobin decides that he may dislike parties, but he thinks that he may be able to bear them if you're there, too.

masterlist

© to agustdiv1ne. do not copy, repost, steal, and/or translate.

#txt fluff #soobin fluff #soobin x reader #txt x reader #txt imagines #txt drabbles #soobin drabbles #soobin scenarios #txt scenarios #soobin fanfic #txt ff #txt fanfic #💌 — soob

[gonzo-rella]

Headcanons: Being Wallace Wells' Trans Boyfriend

MASTERLIST | AO3 | KO-FI

Relationship(s): Wallace Wells x transmasc!reader (romantic)

Warnings/info: Trans typical stuff, like dysphoria, transphobia etc. etc., sexual remarks, he/him pronouns for reader, headcanons were written in one sitting, when I was feeling not great. (Let me know if I need to add any)

(A/N: I've been reading a lot of Succession fics over the last few days. Last night I read a Roman Roy fic and for some reason it gave me this overpowering wave of dysphoria that I still have yet to fully recover from. Annoyingly, I have yet to actually watch Succession so this could have been avoided; I just think Kieran Culkin's hot and very gender so I couldn't resist pretending that someone with his face was my boyfriend. Reading about Roman made me think 'oh shit. Maybe I'm a flawed and pathetic little guy on the inside. But I just look like a woman who likes to kiss women and everyone treats me like a girl and uses my girl name and girl pronouns and that feels super gross and makes me want to live in a hole. Now I'm going to feel bad about that for the next few days.' So, yeah, I'm having another transmasc crisis that I'm using fanfiction to get me through. I figured Kieran Culkin started this, so I might as well write something featuring a character of his that I can actually write for. This is a self-indulgent and self-explorative treat for myself, but I hope that transmasc readers can enjoy this, too. If you'd like more Wallace stuff, trans stuff or Wallace AND trans stuff, feel free to send in a request. I really want to provide more fics for transmasc readers because you guys are super underrepresented (and, y'know, Papa Gonzo-rella wants to explore his gender a little more). Also, I swear that I will get around to watching Succession, and I more than likely will end up writing for it when I do.)

Respectfully, Wallace does not give a shit that you’re trans.

Of course, he doesn’t flat-out ignore it, because it’s part of who you are, but it isn’t an obstacle in your relationship by any means, and it doesn’t bother him in the slightest.

If you’re feeling dysphoric and/or otherwise insecure about yourself, he’ll pinch your cheeks and tell you how handsome and sexy you are.

If you’re feeling especially bad, like ‘not getting out of bed and hiding from the world’ bad, he’ll keep you company and say what he can to reassure you.

Being mushy and sincere truly isn’t his thing, so whatever he says will sound either slightly insensitive (but still pretty sensitive as far as Wallace goes), facetious or like he wants you to get over how you’re feeling so he can fuck you.

But, he genuinely doesn’t want you to feel bad and you can tell he cares, because otherwise he wouldn’t be there for you when you're feeling your worst.

Wallace is very affirming, but in his own Wallace way.

He lovingly refers to you as his lameass boyfriend.

If Scott ever compliments you about anything, Wallace will call him gay.

He will shout ‘gay’, like the Senor Chang meme.

"Hey, man, I like your shirt-"

"Ha, Scott's gay!"

"I-I'm not gay! I just like his shirt."

"What's wrong with being gay, Scott?"

"Nothing! There's nothing wrong with being gay!"

"You really need to work on your internalised homophobia, Scott. To think, my gay lover and I share a bed with a bigot."

If you’re doing anything that he knows will make you dysphoric or exacerbate your dysphoria (for example, scrolling through social media and looking at cis dudes that give you gender envy) he’ll shut it down.

Using the aforementioned example, he’ll snatch your phone off you and close the app, saying: “Nope. Make better decisions.”

And, while you’d initially be annoyed at him for grabbing your phone, you will appreciate it in the long run.

If you have testosterone shots but you’re not a fan of doing them yourself, he’ll begrudgingly help you with them.

He will make a very Wallace comment, though

“Stabbing? I didn’t know you were that kinky.”

If anyone’s a dick to you about being trans, Wallace is always ready to go with a snide remark about the other person, because of all the things you could possibly mock his lameass boyfriend for, being trans is at the bottom of that list.

(He should know, as the person who makes fun of you the most.)

Also, he cares about you very, very much and he doesn't want people being transphobic to his boyfriend.

If you’re cool with it, he will make trans jokes, but nothing ‘attack helicopter’ or ‘attack helicopter’ adjacent, because he’s too clever for that and he can come up with better material that isn’t just derivative, transphobic garbage.

If you get your period and it makes you at all dysphoric, be prepared for this exchange:

“Don’t worry. Scott pissed blood last month and cried about it and he’s still a man.”

“Did-did he go to the doctor?”

“I don’t know. He seems fine now, though.”

If you still have boobs and don’t mind them being touched or otherwise acknowledged, he will use them like a pillow.

If you decide to get top surgery, he will make the following request:

“Well, if you’re not using them, can I have them? I need a pillow that Scott won’t steal. And, he wouldn’t steal your tits, because he knows I’d call him gay for it.”

“Why are you like this, Wallace?”

“Selfish.”

Being trans doesn’t make your relationship much different from any of Wallace’s other relationships.

You’re just, for better or worse, another one of Wallace’s boyfriends.

#wallace wells x reader #wallace wells #scott pilgrim vs the world #scott pilgrim takes off #scott pilgrim #scott pilgrim vs the world x reader #scott pilgrim takes off x reader #x trans!reader #x trans reader #x transmasc!reader #x transmasc reader #x trans male!reader #x trans male reader #x ftm!reader #x ftm reader #trans!reader #trans reader #transmasc!reader #transmasc reader #trans male!reader #trans male reader #trans #transgender #transmasc #x reader

[stellaralignment]

After reading @kira-serialfaggot 's post about inaccessible menus and @butterfly-sapphire post about non-customizable menus figured I now had sufficient excuse to rant about how I hate how every big restaurant's ""solution"" to these two problems is somehow always the worst fucking app I've ever had to use in my life.

So, to clarify real quick. I agree with both previous posts. Places that serve food should have their menu easily accessible somewhere if they have an online presence, and places that let you customize your order need to have that as a feature of any digital ordering solution they implement. Good? Good.

So, a lot of places I've seen (Wendys, Taco Bell, and McDonald to name a few) Have tried to get around how fucking horrible the DD app itself is by making their own apps with DD integration for the actual ordering/serving of delivery orders. Great, this lets them provide their own menu customization options, serve discounts/coupons, and generally have more control over the user experience. Fantastic. As a bonus, this usually also allows you to just look at the menu whenever you want.

Small issue. All of these apps were written by the worst fucking programmers I have ever witnessed in my life. I havn't gotten angry enough to de-compile or try to reverse engineer one yet, but my user experience has been so consistently bad and I've encountered issues that, as a software engineer, I honestly could not tell you how fucked their system has to be in order to allow that to happen.

Allow me to tell you the worst of these. I'm trying to order delivery from a store. It's late, like 7pm, but I know the place is open till 10. I can confirm this on their website (I do later for reasons that will become apparent) and google maps. So I punch in my address, make my order, and go to checkout. Unfortunately, the app tells me "Your payment method failed. Please select a new method and try again". Which was odd, but not unimaginable. I've had issues with my bank in the past. So I swap cards and try again, thinking nothing of it.

Except, my other card doesn't work either. Nor does using PayPal, or Google Pay, or any of the other payment options I tried. I'm getting desperate. I buy some games on steam just to make sure some of these are working, which they are. I was worried, but now that I've confirmed all my money hasn't been siphoned away somehow, I'm just confused and getting annoyed.

So I start going insane. I buy digital gift cards from several different sites and try using them. No dice, payment failed. I try using the website instead of the app, on my phone and PC. Payment failed. I boot up an android studio instance with a brand new virtual phone, install the app on it, and try to order. Again. Payment failed.

I'm starting to wonder if their servers are just completely down. A friend in a different state can order with no problems. A friend in the same town can order with no fanfare.

But my roommates can't. They have the same issue

Payment failed.

So. I'm going insane. I've now spent almost 3 hours attempting to order food, and I'm starving. It is at this point that my anger finally overcomes my social anxiety, and I do the one thing I never thought I'd do.

I call the store in question.

Now, in all of this there was one crucial mistake I made. See, that friend in the same town? Lived on the other side of town. And there's 2 different stores of this franchise in town. We didn't control for this, because the app doesn't let you pick a store anyways when doing delivery. It's hard locked to whatever one is closest, which isn't a terrible thing to do. You need to get the delivery address anyways, and you know where all your store are, so it cuts out a step for me. But having to choose a store might've clued us in to what was going wrong.

Because the store? Was closed. Not just closed, like mega closed. It was being shut down. It hadn't been open for two weeks, and would never be open again. The order was failing because they'd already taken all the computer systems out, and it couldn't confirm to have received the order.

So there was nothing wrong with the payment. Literally nothing I could have done about this. I am just barred completely from ordering because the app defaults to the nearest location for orders, and my nearest location didn't exist anymore.

And you'd think that there would be some way to communicate this to the user when making the app. But for reasons I can only assume are profit motivated (Though I have no idea how the fuck this is more efficient/profitable), the app just defaults to saying the payment failed.

Now, I wouldn't be this mad if this was just "oops edge case lol" where I suffered the unfortunate consequences of some procrastinator forgetting to do the thing that removes stores from the database. Unfortunate but not really anyone I can blame for it. But no. This is just the most extreme example, and it's not even confined to the one app.

Almost every single app like this I've used defaults to saying the payment failed and to try a new payment method when anything goes wrong. No drivers out on DoorDash to actually move the order? Payment failed. You're trying to order a seasonal item that got dropped today? Payment failed. The companies servers actually are down? Payment failed. You're not connected to wi-fi like an idiot and there's actually something you can do to fix the issue that's not related to payment whatsoever? Payment failed.

What the fuck is up with this lazy ass programming? I seriously doubt there's enough technical debt from these apps to justify not having a robust error catching system that communicates with the user what the issue is. By the fucking stars these people love collecting intrusive data, I'm surprised they havn't used this as an excuse to harvest everyone's fucking location at all times and send "error data" back to central.

But just don't tell me my debit card was declined when I'm trying to order a burger and you closed that store two weeks ago.

#journal #rant #i fucking hate food delivery apps #but i'm a poor bitch with no car #and I lived for 3 months off of a BOGO burger coupon once that just never fucking removed itself from my cart even after I ordered #so I continued to cash in on that one coupon for an entire semester #so like don't fix your apps #but don't tell me my fucking bank is broken when you just can't be bothered to update your fuckin store database

[tempting-andromeda]

You got to those last ones quick,so wanna… do more modern eagle flies?

OLEASE DONT CALL ME OUT I HAVE A WHOLE NOTES APP DEDICATED TO MODERN SLASH 90S HEADCANONS

anyways

Eagles Flies modern headcanons pt. 2

Picky about music

Says he can listen to everything but it’s the biggest lie

Whenever he says something awkward he scrunches up his face, clenches his eyes shut, and sighs

He’s never been in an actual relationship before so he genuinely tries but his anger issues and stuff get in the way

Awkwardly asks people for advice

Refuses to apologize over the phone immediately drives to you to apologize and brings you a drink and a snack from the gas station

He’s like always exasperated for some reason. Clenching his fists or huffing

Taps on tables a lot

Started a really mid garage band on the reservation it’s mostly just goo goo doll covers and other songs like that

Once you got ganged you on by the rez dogs so now whenever he sees them he picks you up

It’s half him bullying you and protecting you

Had to go to therapy after his mother and brother died

He goes once a month now

Has anger issues and depression but he doesn’t really talk about it

When he wakes up he sends you a good morning text and goes on a run

Wakes up decently early unless he’s with you

Buries his face into your neck or back

worst road rage ever

He doesn’t yell when your in the car but clenches the steering wheel and tells you to give him a moment to calm down

Real into fast food soft serve ice cream

Used to have a real shitty phone when you guys first started dating but got a better one to get better pictures of the both of you

Watches something on his phone or the tv while he eats

Wants to go to college but he didn’t have the money and keeps promising himself when he has the money he goes but he doesn’t even know what he’d go for

When he was younger he wanted to be a civil rights lawyer to help out with the reservation but after his mother and brother died he realized it wasn’t the best option

#eagle flies #rdr2 headcanons #rdr2 #eagle flies x reader #eagle flies headcanons

[maukiki-but-cringefail]

i swear to fucking god im not a hater but if i see another fucking badly-made thumbnail boring neurotypical straight guy with lame monotone voice talking over buncha mfb clips video of the worst metal fight beyblade takes ive ever seen with the unfunniest jokes im gonna rearrange the DNA sequence of the closest person to me to that of a Doto greenamyeri nudibranch because i swear to god just shut the fuck up.

how the fuck do you meatheads base how much you like a character over powerscaling and win ratio. would you prefer a wild bear over your own mother because the bear is stronger than her? thats how you fuckin sound like. i gotta rant this shit out because i had enough if i hear another fucking "ryūga da goat🥶🐐" "beyblade really is that serious🤣" "This show is so acoustic😵" "did you know that moses split the sea with a be-" WE FUCKING KNOW THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS AT THIS POINT. ALSO IF YOU DEADASS USE AUTISM AS AN INSULT LET ALONE USE THE WORD ACOUSTIC OR ARTISTIC FOR IT STAY 7 KILOMETERS AWAY FROM ME AND ALSO DONT WATCH METAL FIGHT BEYBLADE EVERYONE IS GAY AND AUTISTIC YOU KNOW WHY⁉️ which cishet neurotypical out there makin spinning tops fight with neon green or blue whateverthefuck hair half the cast looks like they been hiding in closet before their debut episode.

PRIME example of these bad takes is , because of powerscaling again the hate on masamune ? i thought people hated him because they thought he was annoying (like how i did when i first watched it when i was little) (FOUR YRS OLD) and like id get that as in he talks alot or whatever but people hate him because. fucking. "he has a low win ratio and claims to be the number one blader" BITCH THATS A 15 YR OLD. or like around that age somewhere you get the point. so what if the taco doritos colour palette guy a little confident in himself bitch you hate fun you hate sillyness. people also use him as like a tool to praise kenta? constantly i see takes like "kenta is like masamune if masamune didnt suck" or something as in they both try to rise to the top and get stronger but one of them doesnt talk shit like did you know you can praise a character without putting down the other one motherfucker. another one is "masamune isnt a legendary blader because he talks shit but cant actually back it up" Hey my brother in Allah lets play a little game. which one of the fucking legendary bladers talks big about himself. you have ten seconds. 10...9...8....KING. KING IS RIGHT THERE .

also saw someone say damian shouldve been a legendary blader⁉️⁉️mf that boy was on rearrangement stereoids the effects of that wouldve already worn off by the time of metal fury how does that even WORKK😭😭 he was probably off with 3 big fucking pet dogs to eat custard pudding or sumn idk .Ryūga dickriding has been a thing for for ever but right now for some reason people decided they didnt talk about that guy enough. theres so many videos on him guys there are other characters to talk about i can write a three billion word essay on damian but i dont think i can say anything about ryūga that hasnt been said at this point. also the people who claim hes alive BECAUSE hes alive in the manga is crazy like yall cant see those as two different universes? im not saying wether if i think hes alive or not this isnt about that dont miss the point. i wanted to make text posts about mfb for forever but i was embarrased for god knows why so i just posted my mfb fanart on my main but i cant take it anymore (eatina burger with no honey mustard) must speak this time im afraid

also sorry if this is hard to read im not good at ending sentences where i should punctuation jumpscare. powerscaling mfs will hear u say u like a character like for example tsubasa or sumn and immediately bring up ryūga like shut the fuck up this shit happened on twitter i dont even use twitter i opened the app for 000.1 seconds. you just jelaous ryūga will never serve like did mf also im not a ryūga hater anyways i reached the character limit fuck

#rant post #Sorry i had to . FUCK. #mfb #beyblade #beyblade metal saga #metal fight beyblade #beyblade metal fight #beyblade metal fury #ryuuga #Ryūga #masamune kadoya #me if i was written by vivziepop

[kaisarionn]

💐 i love your energy it’s so good and it’s just what this dying app needs! Can I plz plz plz request the ghouletts (kinda platonic idk just friendly way) with a ghoulette reader (if you don’t do that normal fem reader is fine) and they are having “problems” with their period ever since they were summoned onto earth. And they NEED to see a doctor but they are scared and uncomfortable bc yk, period talk with doctor is EH. But they comfort them and all that shit. Sorry I just think there is no reason to hide problems with periods if you have them, pray for me

A/n: I agree with this! I’ve had some issues with period problems to the point that I needed a doctor and medicine, it’s the worst. Luckily I’m doing better and I hope you are too! Thank you for the request!

Word count: 783. Angst with comfort. Fem!ghoulette reader. (Tw for mention of periods, though nothing graphic) (I couldn’t find an image with more than two ghoulettes)

Cuddle puddle 🩵

You had been dealing with it by yourself for a while, being far too embarrassed to bring it up to anyone, especially since you were new, but you couldn’t hide it for long due to how badly it affected you.

For one week a month you were practically inconsolable and would hardly leave your room and the ghoulettes immediately noticed this.

They tried to talk to you, but you always go nervous and avoided the topic altogether, until today. Your period was hitting you particularly hard and the ghoulettes were determined to take care of you, which leads to now.

There was a soft knock at the door, but you were in too much pain to get up, luckily the door was unlocked since you rushed to your bed after trying to get some food. Sunshine opens the door and all four ghoulettes come in with various looks of concern upon seeing you curled up on your bed, you looked way worse than they had imagined. “W-what are you all doing here?” You look at them a little embarrassed, not wanting anyone around while you felt so horrible.

It was already hard trying to keep it together long enough to get food without crying, but now you had four ghoulettes in your room while you looked and felt like a mess. “Honey..” Cirrus says softly, shutting the door behind them and coming to sit down in the bed next to you. “Why are you all curled up?” Sunshine sits on the floor next to you, cumulus sits in a nearby chair with Aurora in her lap since there wasn’t much furniture to sit on.

“I feel sick..” You mumble, trying not to tear up from how bad you feel, which was getting harder and harder. “Well we brought you some stuff!” Sunshine nearly yells, but tamps down her enthusiasm when she remembers how bad you feel. “Yeah, we got you food, medicine, a personal heating pad.” Aurora giggles softly, pointing to Sunshine who the ghoulettes often curled up with when they were cold.

“We can leave if you want, we just want to make sure you’re okay first.” Cumulus adds on, holding up an actual heating pad incase you do want them to leave. You start to sniffle softly, a combination of happy tears from feeling so cared for, and overwhelmed tears since your cramps were killing you. “T-thank you..” The ghoulettes take this as their cue to curl around you to comfort and take care of you. Sunshine pulls you into her arms and placing her hand on your pelvis, warming them up to ease your pain.

The others get comfortable around you however they can, wanting to practically cocoon you with their bodies. “Now what’s wrong?” Cirrus knows it’s your period, they all do as they’ve had similar experiences, but she’s trying to get to the bottom of the issue.

“E-ever since I was summoned here my period has been all messed up and nothing helps like it used to!” You bury your face into a pillow, trying to hide your tears. Cumulus gently rubs your back, trying to soothe you as best they can. “Aw sugar.. why haven’t you gone to the doctor? I’m sure they can help.”

You lightly shake your head at the mention of doctors, and they can tell you seem a bit nervous about it. “I don’t like them.. a-and this stuff is so embarrassing..” Aurora scoots around a little bit, trying to get a bit closer to you. “I know doctors are scary, but we can go with you! Cirrus takes me to my appointments, she makes them less scary.”

Cirrus smiles and gently brushes your hair out of your face. “I would be happy to take you, we all would. Doctors don’t have to be scary dear.. and this shouldn’t be embarrassing. We all have to deal with this.” Cumulus grabs out the jar of cookie dough she brought you, offering it out, which you promptly took with a smile. “We’ll always help you out sugar.”

Sunshine opens the jar for you with a soft smile, before going back to kneading at your stomach. “Yeah! Always.” You giggle softly and take a bite of cookie dough with a smile. “You girls are the best.”

#the band ghost #ghost the band #ghost bc #x reader #x y/n #x ghoulette #x aurora ghoulette #x sunshine ghoulette #x cirrus ghoulette #x ghoulette reader #hurt/comfort #light angst #happy ending #period cramps #tw periods

[deargodhelpmeaaa]

Ranking my most noteworthy fictional crushes out of ten

Squidward

Look at this man. Look at his features. Isn't he just completely irresistible? I "fell for" him in in ninth grade and it was initially a joke bc I was obsessed with him since I had a friend who'd always talk Spongebob with me and despite never having watched it I enjoyed discussing it and thought Squidward sounded like an endearing and funny character. I'm not sure if this was completely ironic or not anymore and I'm scared.

6/10

Jon Arbuckle

We are off to an amazing start here, aren't we? Okay, so I just have a thing for pathetic men. And Jon is that. He is a beta male. He is a loser. He is sad. I want to say my "crush" on him developed when I read the comic Garfield Minus Garfield- a comic which I found interesting. I liked seeing this portrayal of the character- someone lonely, mentally unstable and possibly schizophrenic. Also when you boil it down, all Garfield is about is a mentally ill man ranting to his cat about his problems and his cat secretly doesn't give a crap, but he doesn't know because it's a cat who can't talk (iterations where he can hear garfield are dumb and lame unless there's a good reason for it). I love Jon, I am a Jon defender, and I argue he is funny and a cool guy.

8/10

Waylon Smithers

Undeniably the most regrettable fictional crush I have ever had, and sadly the longest lasting and most influential as well. My crush on Smithers lasted all the way through high school and my first year of college. My thirst for him- seemingly invincible. The worst part is, I'm not even completely over him. If I watch the show again without cringing at jokes I quoted badly, I can still see myself getting a little you know... when he shows up. So, what is his appeal, might you ask, why do I like him? Wimp. Wears glasses. Sadboy- he loves someone who doesn't give a crap about him. Something about his unrequited love seemed relatable to me. I also found his submissiveness attractive and he is what introduced me to the idea that a nerdy sadboy who does as I say is actually kind of really sexy. He's also the last nice person on this list. I found his sweetness appealing and for a while this made me think I only liked sweet boys. How wrong I was...

4/10. Would be 0 but he gets extra points because of how important he was to my development as a person. Low because I regret how I acted during this phase of my life. (too loca)

MEDIC

I literally got the game just for him and main him because I think he's hot. He looked like this stern, no-nonsense Atticus Finch-like medical guy who would yell at me in German for being a bad girl and I was into that. Then I played the game, watched the videos, read the comic and fell deeper in love. This guy was not that stern angry guy I thought he was at all. He was a cool guy and all nonsense. Funny, crazy, deeply invested in science, with what appears to be no regard for human or animal life- yet still somehow having a caring side which we see with how sweet he is to his doves- also I love doves too, omg! And he's still definitely the one that would be wearing the pants in this relationship, so the main appeal remains intact.

10/10

Duckman

Hey, what the hell are you staring at! Listen, you're not my dad and I have no control over who I find attractive, so shut up. I watched this show and I just saw this guy and I was like... whoa. Okay. That's... that's a man alright. A duck man, sure, but a man nonetheless. He had it all. He was pathetic, smoked heavily, rude, a goober, horny, impulsive, wore glasses... and was a massive loser, yet he has this strange charm about him that you'll notice if you don't take him too seriously. God, I just want to humiliate him. He's into that, by the way- it's literally canon in the show. He also was my first foray into what I like to call "angry ranting men" which is, well, a type of man who rants about random things. Okay, okay, I get it, ranting=bad whatever. But personally I see a strong appeal in rants. A rant is an unfiltered speech about a topic which one holds strong passion for. It is a glimpse into an insane mind, sure, filled with nonsense, with the occasional valid point made. I enjoy listening to rants because it lets a man let loose and just go wild.... and in a way, it is quite cute! Even if he is completely wrong in every way. I still enjoy listening, wide eyed with a glass of some drink in my hand I can't even drink because I'm kept on the edge of my seat by this strange speech. Also, this character has a good side to him. Like we see he loved his wife and loves his kids, and when he opens up to the women he meets, we see that he really isn't so bad of a person after all. I love this about him, and it is a crucial part of his appeal on top of everything else I've said so far.

7/10 because even I question this one sometimes. But not that much.

George Costanza

He's disturbed, he's depressed, he's got it all! Completely just the most pathetic man on television. An insecure, self absorbed little loser. I love him. He's so weak and he makes me so weak. He also looks really cute sometimes- is this just me? I want to do things to him >:) I think I have this thing where I am attracted to horrible men because I want to give them a better life, as I see myself in them, and boy do I see myself in George. We're both the same little cowards at heart, I think. I think we all have a little George in us. I just want... a lot of George in me. Ba dum ching! I should note that this savior complex mostly applies to fictional men... Irl I would just want someone who I could scare with my freaky boldness and have open up to me a little bit, and be there for. Like some cute Christian boy who is afraid of everything and hates himself for no reason. I don't really have much more to say, since I haven't watched the show in months. Also the last entry literally has the same actor behind him. Do I have a thing for Jason Alexander? It's very possible.

solid 8/10. Not a 10 because I'm worried about myself.

Filthy Frank

In my defense, I also have a crush on Joji so it's okay. But this is a list of FICTIONAL characters and I can't help myself. That's right, y'all, Franku is fictional and if you didn't see that who are you? Now I want you to think about everything here that has been established. I like horny men, losers, ranters, men who are bad with women, and men with ego problems (and then there's just Medic who is the exception to every rule here). Frank is all of those things. He is also completely depraved and has no inhibitions which I also find appealing. When you think about it, he's basically just a really concerning version of a bad boy. He's obviously not someone to admire, and I don't admire him at all. He's a joke. I laugh at him, not with him. I don't agree with most of what he says but if I knew him personally, I would gleefully listen to his insanity, while secretly going "yea no." I also just think he probably is into some weird stuff like.... in the bedroom and that is hot to me. I want to make him cry. Do I want to give him a better life? Not really to be honest. He doesn't really deserve it. I guess he's nice to the lycra people, though, and the book Francis of the Filth gives him a little bit of an arc where he becomes a better person and stuff, and there are kind of hints at him having something resembling a capacity for compassion (mostly in the lore) despite being disgusting and generally amoral, which again, is very important to the appeal. I also find him weirdly charming. If he was a real guy we would get along I think, even if he'd be an asshole to me sometimes and I'd even get fed up with him sometimes- he probably might think I'm cool if I choose my words carefully. Oh, right also he's just hella cute. I know he makes weird, creepy faces and is trying to look like a 45 year old Algebra Teacher who hates his life, but like, that just makes him even cuter to me. And I don't mind the throat cancer voice, either. It's cute, too. He's got this weird, undeniable charm to him that definitely contributed to his success and iconic status. So, sure, he makes weird noises, he's a terrible person, and all, but like... he's also cute and I'd probably try to pry into his sensitive side (which when you think about it, does exist) if he was real. I mostly just like him because he's a stupid, silly bisexual (re-watch the videos; it's true) who wears glasses, though.

My tastes in men are fucked.

8/10

My prediction for my next crush is some asshole from Catch 22 but probably the Chaplain.

I am allowing this list to be used as evidence for the decline of women.

#squidward #spongebob squarepants #jon arbuckle #garfield #Waylon Smithers #The Simpsons #medic tf2 #team fortress 2 #duckman #seinfeld #george costanza #fictional crushes #husbandos #filthy frank #francis of the filth #papa franku #catch 22

[fruttymoment]

if twitter truly getting shutdown then all of my hard work is gone? just like that? why would i make something if it can just be gone forever like that? why would i learn something if i forgot about it later? why would i even do anything at all?

I do not believe Twitter is shutting down. In fact, it was the OFFICE that has been shut down, not the app&servers etc. It will be open again in some time i believe. Despite everything, Twitter is literally one of the biggest and main social media app like ever. It cant really just collapse. Worst that can happen is Twitter being sold again to someone lol

"Imagine the internet dying forever suddenly. With no internet, are you still valuable and important? If you are nobody without the internet, you need to change some things in your life." Is one of my favorite sentences ever. Life must be beyond the internet. So please, dont put your everything to the internet/social media. You shall do your true works in real life. I know its easy to say, but it really is possible. Internet is for our entertainment and information, not a life style.

Why would you do anything at all? Well, we all are born to die. In my opinion, this is the meaning of "life"

Why all important people in the history discovered amazing things, worked hard and all? They also knew they were going to die one day, so why?

Because life means "living the moment". Who cares the end? Literally do whatever you want. You dont need to be an important person, do very special things etc. Life means living today. If you are alive, do something you want today. You dont need your name written by gold letters in history, humanity also will go extinct one day.

What matters, is today. Right now. Are you not happy today? Make yourself happy. You are a very complex, precious biological being with emotions and you deserve to be happy. Everyone does. If you cant make yourself happy, then maybe the definition of being happy is wrong to you.

Happyness does not mean finally achieving your dream. Because when you finally achieve it, there will be no more dreams. Its like wanting to buy something so bad, and when you finally buy it, you realize it wasnt that necessary afterwards. I myself experienced that soo many times.

I myself always aim for the impossible dreams. Why? So i can have fun chasing it forever. Sometimes, adventure is more important than your destination.

But hey! Even living aimlessly is fun. You dont need to have a wacky dream or something to be happy. Nothing wrong with endlessly exploring, learning stuff and living the moments with no purpose in the end.

Sure, you do need to have a job and money to live in the end. But no need to stress yourself for that. You will do it. Stay happy and determined, and you literally can do anything. Motivation is one of our strongest feelings.

And go ahead. Fail things to learn from your mistakes. True success doesnt mean perfection. A successfull person is not someone that is perfect. Its someone that failed at things so hard in the past, but never gave up in the end.

If you are reading this, then you are alive. And you should be proud. Being alive is much harder than it seems, actually.

You already survived from many things. And today, you are successfully alive. So, why give up now?

Make your today different, and have fun with it! Learn from your past, and dont think too hard for tomorrow. We humans literally made the term "time" anyways. Other creatures doesnt even think about it, cuz time doesnt actually exists. It only exists in our mind. Past, future, blehh. Just live your today.

As for writing this, i am getting ready to go outside.

The weather is nice. Exams are over for me. I slept like a baby last night.

Today is very great :>

[blackrosesfanfic]

Chapter 254

Trey

"Do you ever be like damn why these niggas always around?" Devin asks me.

I shake my head. "Naw, Cammie don't miss me as much when MiMi around."

"We gonna be house sitting down the street in a week for 2 months while the family overseas. How you missionaries living in a fucking big house like that?"

"I just want you to know that I was gonna give you shit about how much you accuse me of cheating while being the actual one cheating but other people have other real problems and I just don't feel like arguing."

"You said so much stupid shit."

I sip my drink shaking my head. No man. Your shit ain't clean. You got to smile and say thank you. She got fucking evidence. Dumb ass. MiMi scrunched up her face. She puts her hand up.

"I just said I didn't want to argue."

"What does you cheating got to do with me? Why you come at me like that?"

MiMi looks at me. "Tremaine."

I show her Caden. "Go ahead."

"No, cause if I would have said that to you what would you have said?"

"I don't want to argue either."

She comes over to me snatching my phone. I switch Caden to the other hand about to say something but Devin sits up fast. I look down then at MiMi storming out the room. I look at Devin. His face said it all. He gave me his phone to look at his video of Minnie fussing about being on her stomach. It wasn't my phone that she snatched but his.

"I was shooting you looks. What's the story?"

"I don't want to argue?" He puts his hands up to his face.

I kiss Cadsn as he watches me. "That's going to go good."

Devin turns the TV off. He had been playing Call of Duty. Nigga hurting now. Her finding his shit when she wasn't mad is all good. Her being mad cause he acting pissy bout to make this shit worst. Cammie walks into the room. Did she come for my phone? Ain't shit on it.

"Cheating while in the middle of planning a renewal of your vows is stupid right Devin?"

"Yes it is." He says acting like he calm.

She gives him back his phone. "Yeah, I said that too. Just work on your shit because MiMi is about to be really busy trying to do something big for herself. Nobody needs the negative energy. Don't you think?"

"Yeah, Bae." I say touching her hand.

"Hey, Tremaine and midget Trey." She smiles at me. "Leftovers okay?"

I nod. "Yeah love."

She walks out of the room. "JJ your daddy is right there. What is your problem?"

"No. No problem." He walks in the room wiping his eyes.

"Be a tough guy."

He comes over to me looking at Caden. He lays his head on Caden's stomach.

"I thought he was actually looking for me." Devin sighs on his phone. "I'm deleting everything man. What the fuck?"

"You didn't cheat."

JJ starts whining and goes to Devin falling into his lap backwards. Devin leans back moving his phone out of the way. JJ throws himself up getting in Devins way more. Devin gives him the cellphone. JJ slides down to the floor on the phone. Devin rubs his face.

"Baby playing with the phone and deleted everything." Devin sighs. "She ain't never fucking happy."

"I think you need to be saying how bad you do at seeing if she happy."

Devin cuts his eyes at me. "You wanna give advice now."

"It's easy to check other people shit. I don't have advice for no one but when my wife told me not too long ago that we gonna move on. I moved on. Get my shit together and play husband. I want the girl. It ain't only her wanting me. I got to get my shit together. She giving me time."

"Yeah." Devin says sad. "She probably mad at me."

"When don't you fuck up, Man?"

He cuts his eyes at JJ. "What the fuck you doing on my phone?"

"Downloading my game." JJ says like its simple.

"By deleting shit? Who fucking taught you that shit?"

I chuckle. "Did he actually delete it or you?"

Devin snatches his phone. "I watched him delete the banking app and fucking Facebook."

I laugh. JJ rolls around the floor under his daddy feet.

"Daddy, King has a dog. King poke his dog in the butt with the gun." JJ says upset. "I fight him cause he did that. Ms. Mommy yell at everybody then King said shut up. Daddy I say shut up?" He covers his mouth looking at Devin.

"Not to your mama."

"I tell you to shut up?"

"Do it and see what happens."

He tilts his head at Devin about to say it. Devin looks at him then sit up. JJ makes his eyes big then goes back to bothering Devin. JJ not as bad as Lane. He likes to test his boundaries without going over them but he hates getting in trouble. Lane don't fucking care about getting in trouble. I even think he like getting in trouble with Cammie.

"Good thing he not around him much." I say.

"I was thinking that."

Amber

I suck my teeth. I don't even know where Chris is. He said he would be there when I was done with the video shoot but he was not. I come to the hotel and he isn't here either. I cross my arms and sit down on the bed. I call Cammie.

"He ghosted me."

"Chris?"

"He not even answering his phone. I tell him to wait to talk and he can't even wait."

She blows. "I feel like yall on the wrong damn shit. Like not even reading the same book. You spoke English to him?"

"How the fuck I sound to you?"

"Trick if you talking to him like you talking to me then no wonder he ghosted you. Why so damn rude?"

I lay back on the bed. "I'm really tired. I didn't know it would take that long. I just want to sleep and talk to you tomorrow."

She blows. "I wish I knew what to tell you. I don't know where he is."

"It's fine. I'm going to bed. I'm not even washing my ass."

"Damn that's stank Bae. You MiMi's fucking bitch with that shit."

"I traveled around the world with you when you were pregnant. Your ass can't even accept me the way I am."

She laughs. "With a stank ass. Video shoot smelling sweaty ass."

I smile. "You come to Houston and wash me."

"Why your two day old crusty ass in Houston? MiMi come talk to our wife. She not washing her ass tonight after an all day music video."

"You have damn rights. Shit Minnie had me walking around for a few days without washing my ass. I ain't never took so many showers than today. Two in one day?"

I laugh. "Lord."

"Oh my gosh. Move your butt. You gonna say that then sit by my face."

"You really pushing me? Stop." MiMi whines.

I blow. "I need yall here."

"Say it again and I will fly to damn Houston tonight. They left me all week by myself. I sure will be gone. Caden ass right there at home."

"Amber!" MiMi yells.

Cammie is laughing. "Why you wake her up? Her stank ass need to stay still. Too much movement we gone smell it from here."

"Amber!"

"What?" I say holding my head up. The phone is black.

"Amber!"

A light turns on. "I been worried about you."

I blink my eyes. "What?"

"What the fuck you on?" Chris asks grabbing my face. "Keep fucking saying the same damn thing."

"Fuck you."

He let's my face go. "Fuck me!"

"Must be fucking Irish... no Irish speak English. Greek?"

"Oh yes sir. She is here. She isn't feeling good. I woke her up. Yes sir. Send you what?"

I try to get myself up from the bed to get my shit together. Damn did I take something? I'm questioning my damn self. Feels like I got bricks in my shoulders. I just give in laying my ass back down. I used to have more energy than this. Like damn.

"I'm so hungry." I say sitting up in the bed suddenly.

I sigh as I look around the room at pitch black nothingness. I had slept for a couple more hours or so. I was in the hotel room alone once again. I check my phone. Cammie had sent pictures of the babies to my phone while I was sleeping. I hope my baby is beautiful. They have fucking award winning babies. Minnie baby is fucking dark chocolate next to Caden Umber skin. Both so beautiful. I lay down and call Chris. No answer. Fuck it. Sometimes I think we were better friends. This is difficult. I feel like its difficult in ways none of his other relationships were. Seem like they were less forced. Not a good example because they all ended in shit.

"You fucking can't be sleeping still."

"I'm not." I say opening my eyes clearly sleep. "I missed my nap today."

He is closer but the room dark. "Apparently."

"Where the fuck you been all day?"

"Waiting on you." He says like I should know better.

I fumble for a light. It turns on before I could get to it. Chris is standing there in boxers, nothing else. I don't know why he acting like I did something to him. I roll my eyes and get out the bed. I feel so tense. I stretch which just stretches my bladder and remind me to go pee faster. I go pee before I ask anymore damn questions. Apparently he not talking.

"What the fuck you been waiting on me to do?" I snap once out the bathroom.

"What?"

I roll my eyes going in the bathroom. "Waiting on me for..."

"You serious?" Chris yells.

"Like a damn heatstroke."

Chris comes in the bathroom. "We were waiting at the restaurant for you. We even ordered fucking thinking you were just late."

"We? My fucking parents?"

"Man you shitting me." Chris stares at me. "I fucking heard your gotdamn assistant tell you about the dinner. You repeated her. I said I was going head cause they was there!"

"You got to yell?"

He throws one arm up. "You made me eat dinner with your fucking parents as they fucking play the guessing game about what this about. I finally just fucking told them about our wedding plans. The shit was too fucking weird. Needed some damn drugs. You wouldn't fucking answer your phone."

I cover my mouth. "No."

"Eating dinner with just your parents? Your fucking stuck up parents. When have I ever been the type?"

"Never."

Chris narrows his eyes at me. "I wanted to break up with you."

"Breaking up?"

"I was picturing you in the hotel room dead. In a damn car somewhere dead with my child. Your fucking mama was finally like Chris go to the hotel make sure she okay and call us."

"That saved our relationship?"

Chris stares at me for a few seconds. "I don't know."

"Oh so you still wanna break up?"

"Do you want to be with me? With me having my baby? I do remember you once being okay with having your ex baby. But because it's my baby."

I put my hands on my hips. "I'm fucking okay with having your baby, Christopher. That's far from the problem. I'm not getting rid of my baby."

"So what's our problem?"

"That..." I stop and cover my mouth.

Chris comes over to me. "You okay?"

I wave my hand. "I'm hungry."

"You hungry? Never seen nobody act like that cause they fucking hungry."

"It's like acid reflux or some shit. I just know I need some damn food or I'm going to lose my guts."

"Your parents brought your Alfredo by." He suggests.

I shrug. "I feel like I'm not supposed to feel like this so sudden. Like..." I start crying. "I don't want to feel like this for months."

Chris comes closer hugging me. "How you feeling that got you crying?"

"Just forget it." I push away feeling stupid for crying.

"Man." Chris says shrugging.

I walk into the bathroom. I'm just going to take a shower. I feel like shit. I feel nauseous but yet I want to eat. I don't want no damn Alfredo. I rather wash my ass than eat some damn Alfredo. I get in the shower and just want to get back out. I lean on the wall and cry.

[workscounselingcenter]

Finding Harmony In and Out of Work

Have you ever stayed at work after hours because you have to answer all your emails before feeling like you can leave? Do you bring work home to do on the couch while watching The Bachelor? Have you ever found yourself saying yes to everything that is asked of you, even if it causes you to feel very overwhelmed? I can certainly say yes to all of these things, and I don’t like to assume, but I can imagine you said yes to all of those questions too. It is common to hear about people bringing work home with them. To be honest, I can’t remember the last time I heard someone say that once they leave the office, work is out of sight and out of mind. If you are someone that struggles to find work life balance, I hope this blog post finds you. As someone who is in the process of cultivating a healthy work life balance, these are some of the key points that I have found helpful.

Set Clear Boundaries and Stick to Them

I am sure whoever is reading this is saying, “Well duh, that’s a given.” You’d be surprised by the amount of times I have set work boundaries, only to ignore them when I actually need to be sticking to them if I want to avoid curling up into a ball of stress. These boundaries can look like defining your work hours and sticking to them, dedicating time to have a lunch break so that you are nourishing your mind and body during the work day, or communicating with your boss/colleagues regarding your workload capacity. These examples are each important in their own way. When the clock strikes 5:00 pm, you should be shutting down your laptop and heading out the door. When your stomach is grumbling, it might be time to take your lunch break. Don’t worry, the email you were about to send can wait an hour! If you are struggling to find available hours to provide support to new clients, it may be a good idea to communicate to your boss that you need to pause taking on any new work. For all my perfectionists and achievers out there, I promise that you will still be your best work self, even when setting these boundaries.

Shutdown Work Applications

It’s the weekend, time to put your work phone on do not disturb! Those glorious two days we have to rest should not be interrupted by the ping of a new email or a notification reminder about an upcoming meeting the upcoming week. I found that silencing notifications or resisting opening apps that my workplace uses creates a separation between work and personal life. If you are going on a vacation and are going to be out of office for a week, you can go as far as deleting the apps off your phone. They will still be there for you to redownload when you get back! If you don’t want people to think you fell off the face of the earth, you can always set up an out of office email response. I bet you will notice your screen time is going down after a few weeks of implementing this into your work life balance routine!

Learn to Say No

This key point goes out to all my fellow people pleasers. Does the idea of saying no to work things make you want to shrivel up inside? Me too. However, it is time for us to start learning to say no when it’s just not in the cards. Check in with yourself and notice when you are getting overwhelmed with your workload. It is okay to decline additional work when you are at your workload capacity. It’s going to be uncomfortable. You may feel like you are letting people down and getting the worst employee of the year. Let me be the one to tell you, you aren’t letting people down and you are not getting the worst employee of the year. I don’t even think that award exists! You can still excel in your job and be an attribute to your workplace, even when you aren’t constantly taking on a new task. I know it is going to be hard to say no but practice makes progress!

Get the help you need.

#Harmony #Self Help #Work

[cyarsk52-20]

It’s Black people fault racists being racist? Shut the hell up.

It’s Black people fault this piss ass state has a Democratic party run by a Republican oil heiress who likely PURPOSELY handicapped this race?

Go shoe shine somewhere the fuck else

Black people dont even have the NUMBERS to do that in Louisiana. Yall dumb as FUCK.

Whole state party run by bitches who were at work when the Challenger exploded but want the KIDS to give a fuck about any of this

NO SMOKE for any other race. Black folks gotta fix it all? Suck my imaginary dick!

Shawn Wilson didnt even start campaigning around the state til THIS FUCKING SUMMER. The Democrats did not even TRY.

You slew foot ass unseasoned chicken flavored bitches really couldnt wait til MONDAY after the election to blame Black folks. Have they even finished the TALLY?! LIKEEEEEEEEE

It’s always BLACK PEOPLE fault for you piss poor ass bitches not wanting to do your jobs.

Kiss my ass!

Its Black people holding this PISS ASS STATE TOGETHER

and that piss ass state doesn’t deserve nann black body a resident or tourist

It’s Black people fault the LA Democratic Party spending time funding Dem vs. Dem races instead of recruiting new talent so we dont all have to vote DOWN BALLOT for Republicans? Go choke on a bag of weiners

So if you are on this app blaming BLACK PEOPLE IN LOUISIANA, a 3rd of this population and many of whom are ineligible to vote and are gerrymandered out of being able TO vote, you a shoeshining ass bitch and I wish the worst for you

This piss ass state is what it is CAUSE THE LA DEMOCRATIC PARTY IS A CLOWN CAR

How is this even ACCEPTABLE? To just outright LIE and claim Black people are the reason Jeff Landry is now governor? You dont think we dont know he HATES US? But guess what? So do LOUISIANA Dems.

We supposed to look at Katrina Jackson or Troy Carter like KINFOLK? PLEASE

LMAO at blaming low voter turnout on voting day being the same weekend as 2 HBCU homecomings (as if that wasnt by design by those fucking racists) AND NOT DEMOCRATS BEING FUCKING TRASH

Also bitching about low voter turnout? BABY GIRL /BOY OR BETTER YET BIIITCH FUCK OFF.

You fuckers didnt run on WOMEN despite THESE headlines circulating the block all year, if I had a penis you can choke on it

Also LEST WE FORGET:

Black Democrats outlawed abortion in Louisiana. That bill was signed into law by a DEMOCRAT GOVERNOR.

YOU fquckasses NEED TO BURN IN HELL blaming Black residents of this ridiculous state for the disarray of the Party and the harm we experience. Heck I’ll take you down there myself if I could

Also ALOT OF PEOPLE are ineligible to vote due to their immigration status and criminal records. 1 in 3 Americans has a criminal record and Louisiana incarcerates the most people per capita IN. THE. WORLD. I dont wanna hear this goddamn bullshit narrative around us.

ALL you nigclears and nig hew bitches (along with actual hews and clears ) need to turn that mirror onto yourselves.

Fucking Carter out here shoeshining for Steve Scalise of all people and you want Black folks to swoop in and save the day for you ungrateful bitches.

YALL gave Jeff Landry this race. Leave Black Louisianians ALONE

And let me tell you something else! If Jeff Landry

1. Stealing taxpayer money

2. Using the LA police as hired guns for his donors

3. Running an interstate coalition of AGs to hunt women for abortions & supporting the DEATH penalty for them

wasnt ENOUGH? Nothing was gonna be.

And the ONLY reason y’all blaming Black people is b/c y’all are deluded enough into thinking we ALL experience harm the same. Black people suffer no matter WHO is in office. Bel Edwards signed the first Blue Lives Matter bill into law in the NATION & HID CORRUPT COPS FROM THE LAW

Honestly Yall mothers are BITCH MADE! And y’all daddy’s mommas some ugly HOES! And so are you

And that’s what the problem is. So on DAY 1 post-election in one of the WORST DEFEATS this state’s Democratic party has ever seen, maybe sit with THAT instead of uniting under a “Blame Black folks” narrative

The state with the WORST maternal mortality rate in the nation has DEMOCRATS ban abortion.

WORST education in the country and they banning Black history and books

HIGHEST incarceration rate & a Democrat shielded murderous cops from the FBI.

BUT WANT BLACK FOLKS TO SHOW UP?

Like this state doesn’t deserve them!

let the state drown in the mess they made. Drown!

Sorry for the rant but I had to LET THEIR ASSES KNOW!! They always wanna blame the utter failures on black folks. Nah! The turnout sucked because your policies sucked and you didn’t want to do the work.

This is the same rhetoric that will be floating around next year in Florida if the Democratic and progressives orgs do not get it together. They have so much work to do to rebuild infrastructure & re-engage voters and I have yet to see it.

don’t you dare blame black folks because you’re incompetent af!

[celesteiscute]

This stupid situation is all I can think about and it's driving me crazy that my roommate just straight up lied to me when I expressed hesitation about moving in with them. They told me that they're really easy to live with and that their cat is very well behaved and that they keep it really clean. This is gonna get super venty so I'm putting it under a read more.

When I moved in with them, I asked how they wanted to deal with conflict if something ever came up and they said that they preferred if I were direct with them. Then, when their cat being in my bed constantly became an issue, I asked if they could do something about it and they literally shut down and stopped speaking to me except over text messages. They texted me later saying this was because I "bombarded" them and they actually only wanted me to bring things up in the morning so they can think about it throughout the day. 2+ months later, after exactly 0 attempts on my roommate's part to compromise about the cat situation and me asking exactly 1 time after the first time I brought it up for them to please keep the cat out of my bed my bed when I'm not home because the cat was getting better about it when I was home but I was still finding litter in my bed which grosses me out, I got a message about how we needed to have an in-person discussion about our living arrangement. That "discussion" was them reading from their notes app a speech they wrote about how they wanted me to move out. The monologue included a list of my unforgivable sins which were

1 Raising my voice at the cat (this was only in instances where the cat was on my bed because they asked me to be the one responsible for training their cat and I obviously wasn't going to start beating it with a shoe or something)

2 Closing my bedroom door on my way out that morning (I do this every morning. The cat just happened to be on the other side of the door that day)

3 Leaving trash on top of the trash can (it was one frozen meal box that was there for less than half an hour because it was full but I was eating)

4 Leaving my laundry in the dryer on their designated day (they had changed which day was their day and I forgot because I was more worried about the cat vomit they had left on the carpet all day even though when I complained about having to clean up cat vomit they offered to clean it next time so that morning I asked them to clean it and came home 12 hours later to find that they hadn't and it dried up)

The whole time I was really trying to think like "wow what have I done without realizing like am I being super horrible?" and I was trying to introspect and really couldn't come up with any reason why my roommate was being so cold and refusing to speak to me about anything. When it was laid out in front of me, I realized that they were just insane and impossible to live with. Legitimately (with the exception of my tone with the cat) they were talking about single instances of me "disrespecting the house" that could've been addressed.

Either way, whether I'm being asked to leave because my roommate realized they simply can't handle conflict like an adult or if there's more to it that my roommate just won't communicate for whatever reason, I have to find new housing. Looking for housing is already stressful when you know it's coming. Like, I was stressed five months ago when I knew my lease was ending soon and I needed to find a new place to live so I'm sure you can imagine how and why this getting thrown on me on a random Tuesday night turned into an all-consuming type of stress.

I keep trying to remind myself that I'm not in a situation where I'm being evicted. I'm still on this lease whether they like it or not so realistically there is no enforceable deadline but its obviously uncomfortable as fuck. The worst part is that I'm traveling internationally in three weeks and there's no way that I can find a place and move before my trip. So like I was kinda worried about my trip but now I can't even be excited for my trip because I'm stressed.

[hotthotgarbage]

Week 8

After a few days using a dating app. I feel like I should have done this sooner. Like this shit is so easy. I get like 15 likes a day. But now I’m simultaneously talking to ten different people and the ones I would actually meet in person can’t take a fucking hint. Like one suggested that we watch a movie together. I tell them that I want to go see pearl. and their like “that sounds good” like bruh what do you meannn. this is a dating app try to plan the date my guy. 

My roommate is going crazy. She broke up with her boyfriend and is now coping with home improvement. She rearranged her whole room and painted our kitchen purple. It looks good so I honestly can’t complain. She also bought us a toaster so we no longer have to use the oven to make toast. But this is also starting to become a problem because she wants me to split the cost of things and I have never been more broke in my life. I’m gonna have to pull from my saving to pay rent because all of my paycheck went to fixing my car and getting a new computer. Neither of which were things that I could really put off. This money issue is making me extremely anxious. Like all I ever want to do is shut down. I took a day of work so I can go to my friends Halloween party and I don’t even have a costume yet. My boss is making my shifts longer, which kind of helps with the money but I'm also just so exhausted that being at work doesn’t feel that good right now. I can’t wait till the semesters over so that I can finally have a break. 

I had the worst day at work ever last Saturday. It’s the busiest day of the week and our manager had to be at the other location. The four of us on staff wanted to kill each other the whole time. Two of them are dating and got into an argument before work, making the day have a very rough start. She cried and he kicked a door and my other coworker and I were both ready to send the two of them home if it weren’t for the fact that it was the busiest day of the week and actually needed them there. And after they made up and pretended the whole thing didn’t happen, they decided that our other coworker was actually the problem. The fact that this whole thing is probably going to happen again this week is just more torture for the rest of us. They just need to actually admit that the two of them don’t seem to work as a couple, and they are starting to get super unprofessional. Now my work place is not the least bit professional to begin with, but it is an unspoken rule that if you are dating someone on staff, that you pretend like its not happening at work. They did this for a long time, but suddenly they are all lovey-dovey or mad at each other. And I am going to kill them. I was also just really weirded out when I found out they were dating in the first place. They kept it secret from everyone for like three months, and I was really good friends with both of them, so the fact that they didn’t tell me made it just eel wrong. Also, she is 19 and he is 30. fucking weird. I never took him for a creep, but why would he date a fucking teenage. And it does not help that she looks like she could be 15 or 16. It really is all men. 

[moonlit-jeno]

friends (m.)

pairing: lee jeno x fem reader

genre: explicit sexual content | omegaverse | heat sex | unprotected sex | some name calling

words: 3.6k

don’t like don’t read :)

“Your heat’s coming up.” Jeno says, point blank in between bites of his apple. You just nod, taking a break from your notes to side eye him. It’s not odd for him to know intimate details of your life- you do make sure to keep him updated on your cycle just so that he can send you the notes for the days you miss - but it’s not exactly a common subject for the two of you. “Who are you spending it with?”

There are still 13 powerpoint slides for you to grind through, but you figure a small break won’t hurt. Might as well use the conversation topic for something good, aka a reason to slam your laptop shut. You turn to Jeno, giving your best friend your full attention, and take the iced coffee right out of his hand. He doesn’t protest. “No idea. Would call Jaemin but he’s ‘found the one’ or something, so I’ll probably just spend it by myself.”

“By yourself?” Jeno’s eyebrows shoot up to his hairline as if you’ve just admitted to committing a sin. It’s not like the concept isn’t unheard of, there’s a market full of toys to help you through it. “Isn’t that dangerous?” You shrug and take a sip of the coffee, offering him your smoothie in exchange. He takes a sip and then bites down on your straw. His entire face scrunches and he yanks his face away from the beverage. He pulls the straw up, inspecting the now soggy and dented object with disgust. “Fuck, what is this made out of?”

“Paper.” You huff a laugh out through your nose, taking your smoothie back. “And I mean, it’s not any more dangerous than spending your heat with the wrong person. Plus, my heats get kind of… intense.” If Jaemin sleeping for three days straight and limping after is anything to go by, both parties take the short end of the stick. You’d felt so bad after and apologized to him profusely, but he had just thrown you his signature dazzling grin and told you that drowning in pussy was exactly the way he envisioned himself dying. He definitely didn’t complain about the brownies you’d baked him as a ‘thank you’, though.

“Spend your heat with me.” The bold request has your brain malfunctioning, at a loss for where to even start reacting to his statement. You just stare at him, mouth opening and closing repeatedly while he returns the gaze earnestly. “Look, it makes sense, right? I know you better than anyone, and you already trust me. Plus if they’re as intense as I’ve heard they are, you need someone there.”

You frown, opening your laptop up and staring blankly at the screen just to avoid having to look at Jeno. It does make sense to have him there with you, and it’s not like he’s the worst person to have sex with. Plenty of people around campus have delighted in talking about their nights with Jeno, dreamily telling you how lucky you are to have him and falling deaf to your insistence that the two of you aren’t like that. Plus, you’re not blind and even if you’re not the cute couple everyone thinks you are, you can admit that he’s hot.

“Wait, hang on. What do you mean ‘heard’ about? What shit is Na Jaemin saying?” Jeno’s shoulders shake with his laughter at your sudden concern. “I mean, he didn’t say anything, but that was kind of the problem. He didn’t show up to practice for like a week and when he finally did, he looked like he’d been mauled. Coach had to bench him.”

Your heart drops slightly at hearing that Jaemin’s soccer had been affected. He hadn’t told you that. “Oh.” The guilt must show on your face because Jeno is quickly soothing you, making sure to tell you that they all found Jaemin’s state funny. “Okay, wait. Wouldn’t you have the same problem if you help me?”

“It’s off-season. So, what do you say?” Jeno waits for your response expectantly, eyes soft, curious. “You can say no, y/n. I don’t want to pressure you at all, I’m just letting you know that it’s an option.” “I’ll think about it.” And you do. A concerning amount.

You spend that night tossing and turning, trying and failing to shut your brain off. Worries about ruining your friendship and about hurting Jeno bounce around your brain no matter how much you try to stop thinking about it. What if something bad happens during it? What if you never talk again? And worst of all is your brain telling you that he doesn’t actually want you specifically, he just wants to be with an omega in heat. You’re just convenient. 

That thought actually makes you cry and you wrap your blankets even tighter around yourself, sobbing weakly into your pillows. In an effort to distract your wandering mind you grab for your phone, opening instagram to find an influx of dm’s from Jeno. It calms you a bit, the messages ranging from cute dogs to absolutely cursed memes, and you smile softly at the reminder that he’s your best friend, and that he definitely cares about you. Biting your lip, you hesitate for only a few moments before typing out a “you can help”, hitting send before you can second guess it. You lock your phone and set it face down on the dresser, thankfully finding sleep as soon as your head hits the pillow.

It’s hot when you wake up, clothes clinging to your skin uncomfortably. Peeling your shirt off only gives you relief for a moment but then the sticky heat is back full force. You whimper in misery, trying to snuggle back into your bed for at least some comfort, but you find that the corner of your fitted sheet has come up, the rest of your blankets on the floor. There’s only one pillow near you and it’s soaked in sweat. You panic slightly, frantically yanking your sheets back onto the bed and trying to fluff them up as much as possible, only calming down once the bedding has been fixed to your liking. Only once you’ve settled down in the plushness of your blankets do you have a moment of clarity.

“Oh shit.” You shoot up and search for your phone, dropping it once before finally managing to open the correct app. There’s a few messages from Jeno that you don’t bother looking at, going straight for the ‘call’ button. He picks up on the third ring.

“Hello?” He sounds groggy, like he’s just woken up, and a flash of heat runs through you at the low tone. “Why are you calling me at 5 a.m?”

You manage to stop fantasizing about your best friend long enough to choke out the word “Heat.” It comes out pathetic and whiny and you pause to clear your throat, trying to keep a clear head as well. “I’m sorry, my heat came early and I wanted to call you but you can go back to bed, I didn’t realize-”

“Fuck, okay, I’ll be over in 10.” Jeno cuts off your rambling with a swear, some rustling in the background accompanying his words. 

“Thank you.” You whisper, setting the phone down and curling up in bed, trying not to focus on how agonizingly slow the time is passing.

Jeno’s looking down at his shoes when you open the door, kicking idly at the door mat and fidgeting with the bag in his hands, though his head snaps up when he notices you. The smile on his face falters when he inhales, turns a little strained as he gets a taste of your heat, and you honestly give him props for the amount of restraint he has. It’s definitely more than you have, at least, because you’re on him the second he’s inside. He ends up sandwiched between you and the door, bag dangling precariously in one hand while he envelopes you in his strong arms. You don’t (can’t) do anything besides bury your face in his chest and whimper, knowing exactly what you want but being too needy and fuzzy to remedy it.  

“Jeno, it hurts.” You whimper and lift your face to nose along the skin just above the collar of his shirt, finding that while the skin to skin contact helps, it doesn’t fully relieve the heat scorching through you, the dull ache screaming for Jeno to take you already. “Please…” He holds you closer to his chest, encasing you fully in his scent, and picks you up bridal style. “I’ve got you baby, don’t worry.”

Being around Jeno does help to ease your stress, but it also serves to make you needier. The warm scent that you’ve grown to associate with the man is stronger than you’ve ever smelled it and it’s making you lose your mind more and more by the second. You’re worried that you’re drooling by the time he sets you down on your bed. He pauses to drop the bag he’s holding on the floor, and then he’s on top of you, strong arms caging you in.

The first kiss is soft, chaste. It would be cute if you weren’t so fucking needy, but you are and it’s just not enough. Unsatisfied, you thread your fingers through his hair and tug, nipping at his bottom lip and tilting your head to the side to get a deeper angle. A groan rumbles in his chest and he returns the kiss with more intensity, trying to take control again. You don’t let him, even if every instinct in your body is screaming at you to just submit.

Jeno shifts on top of you, scooting so that he can fully lay down between your legs. You wrap your limbs around him on instinct, pulling him as close as you possibly can and- oh. The close proximity means that you feel everything when he grinds down, and the feeling of having him so close to where you need him has any semblance of control that you had draining out of your body. You gasp pitifully, annoyance clawing at you from the amount of fabric blocking you from what you want.

“Please,” You almost sob, tugging at his shirt while trying to grind your lower half against his, the pressure of his cock against your center making your eyes roll. Jeno pulls back to yank his shirt off and then he’s back, hands sliding down your body to your panties, tugging the fabric down as far as he can before he growls in frustration and just rips the fabric in half. 

“Shit, you’re so wet.” Jeno moans in awe, breaking the kiss yet again to marvel at your pussy. “Bet I could just slip right in.” He drags his fingers through the slick on your upper thighs, eyes glued between your legs. You’re just about to complain when he finally presses his fingers into you. The initial relief has you moaning sweetly, though it quickly turns to impatient pleas for his cock. You clench around his fingers, reaching a hand down to palm over where he strains against his sweats.

“I need you to fuck me.” You beg, looking at him with what you hope is a convincing expression. “Please Jen, I need you.” “You have me.” He promises you, flicking his wrist faster, curling his fingers just right. “I’m right here baby.” It’s sweet, and under normal circumstances it would be enough, but right now it’s not what you need and the frustration has you on the brink of tears.

You buck your hips and try to arch up as if it’ll magically make him slip in, but Jeno remains as patient and controlled as ever. It’s too hot and every part of your body is screaming for him to fuck you, for him to claim you, and his refusal is killing you. “Alpha please, I need you.”

He absolutely snarls, pinning down your wriggling body with one hand around your throat. The other hand stays between your legs where it continues to strike pleasure into every single nerve ending you have, adding to the fire already coursing through your veins. “What you need is to take what your Alpha’s giving you. You’re not in charge here, okay?” With his face pressed so close to yours you have no choice but to make direct eye contact, staring straight into the most intense gaze you’ve ever seen. His pupils are blown out so wide that his eyes are almost black. Unable to tear your eyes away and as if in a trance, you find yourself nodding. The corner of his mouth quirks up. “Good girl. Now listen to your Alpha and cum.”

It happens almost instantaneously, as if his words were directly connected to a trigger, your body exploding just as soon as the words leave his mouth. Your entire body locks up, mind going blank as the immense pleasure takes hold of you, leaving you clawing at his back and screaming silently into the air. 

The orgasm only serves to thicken the haze in your mind, clouding any thoughts that aren’t related to the Alpha above you and his cock. It takes a moment for your eyes to finally come back into focus enough to make out your surroundings, and you’re greeted by the sight of Jeno with his fingers in his mouth, sucking your essence off of his digits. You’re burning so hot, so much hotter than you think you’ve been before, and it’s hard for you to function. All you can think about is his cock.

“Please,” You beg, swatting at him weakly. “Alpha please, I need you so bad.”

There’s no way that Jeno isn’t being affected by the pheromones clouding the air, but he manages to appear unbothered, his actions rough but nowhere near as desperate as yours. He just laughs lightly at your begging. “Aww, baby needs me?” The rhetorical question is punctuated by a slap, his hand coming down on your pussy hard enough to draw a yelp from you, thighs closing on his hand in a conflicting attempt to relieve the pressure from the hit and keep his hand on your cunt. He laughs meanly and pulls his hand away, drawing back slightly to spit onto your already soaking pussy, rubbing the spit into your skin while he talks. “This pussy belongs to me, yeah? You’re mine now.” Jeno leans down, mouth at your neck so that he can bite at the skin. “That means that I can do whatever I want with you.” You can’t speak, can’t even begin to think about what you should say in this situation. He presses a kiss to your jaw before pulling back and uses his free hand to turn your head so that you make eye contact with him. “Tell Alpha what you need.” “Need Alpha in me.” You beg, plead, flipping yourself over onto your hands and knees and arching your back, presenting yourself to him. “Need your knot, need you to fill me up, breed me, Alpha please-” Your sentence is cut off by his cock slamming into you, the filthy sound being drowned out by his groan. You gasp in relief, breathy thank you’s leaving you with each powerful thrust he delivers. His cock stretches you out so well, makes you go dizzy with the relief of finally having him in you. Your elbows give out nearly instantly, your chest hitting the mattress, and Jeno takes instant advantage of the new position to pull your hips even higher into the air.

It’s so good- almost too good- and it leaves you drooling and clawing at the sheets. All you can focus on is how well he’s fucking you, how he’s going to fill you up so well, breed you like he was meant to. 

You scream when he pulls out, alarm bells going off as your body instantly protests. It only lasts a second though, Jeno’s hands never leaving your body as he flips you onto your back. 

“Couldn’t see you,” Jeno pants out, dropping a kiss to the corner of your mouth and pushing back in, returning back to the brutal rhythm he had before. It has your eyes rolling in your head at how fucking good he feels. “My pretty baby, taking everything I give her.” 

He’s got you so fucked out that you don’t even realize your tongue is hanging out of your mouth until he pinches it between his thumb and index finger, pulling it out even more. “You love my cock, hmm? You love everything I give you.” The pad of his thumb rubs over your tongue, the sensation making your toes curl and tears slide down your cheeks. “Such a fucking needy omega, isn’t that right?” He tugs on your tongue, your head following his actions as he leads you into nodding.

Jeno laughs and lets go of your tongue, dropping his face down to kiss at your neck. He sucks mark after mark into your skin, licking over each one to soothe it after, until he finally gets to your most sensitive, vulnerable spot. Even just the feeling of him close to your mating mark has your entire body aching for it, your neck craning to the side and pushing into his touch. The leverage you get from your legs wrapped around his waist has him pushing even deeper into you and you can feel his knot at your entrance, not quite fully swollen but definitely getting there. It has you absolutely keening, the thought of being so totally owned making you desperate.The sweet drag of his cock along your walls paired with the absolute filth he’s spewing has your body locking up with no warning, your orgasm ripping through you. You arch off the bed, the action only pushing you further onto his cock.

“God y/n, fuck!” Jeno curses, slamming his hips into you with even more force, his knot popping into your entrance and forcing the neediest sound you’ve ever made to leave your lips. You desperately wrap your limbs around him, trying to get him even closer, digging your heels into his ass to push him further inside. He grinds his hips against you one, two, three more times before he shudders, teeth clamping down right on your sweet spot as he comes. Jeno seems to come forever, filling you up with delicious warmth, making your body purr in satisfaction. He finally comes down, having the clarity of mind to tip the two of you onto your sides so that he doesn’t crush you when he collapses. He still tugs you close, arm thrown around your body possessively, his chin resting atop of your head.

“Told you it was intense.” You laugh out, trying to break the silence in the room. The heat’s subsided for now, but you’re still barely in your mind, and you have no idea how long the break will last. 

He huffs out a laugh, chest shaking against you. “I understand Jaemin now.” His hand pets over your back, sliding up to the back of your neck and scratching lightly at the skin there. “You alright?” “Mhmm, yeah. Perfect.” His fingertips press lightly against the mating mark, sending sparks shooting down your spine, and it has your head spinning. You try to adjust yourself against him in an effort to keep your cool, but moving has his cock shifting inside of you and you sleepily grind against him, not thinking. Jeno hisses and tightens his grip on you to keep you still, but the way he grabs your leg has him shifting inside of you and pressing against all the right places. Heat floods through you and your grinding turns more urgent. 

“Ohgod,” You moan, finding enough strength to push Jeno flat on his back. Your body has a mind of its own and you find yourself bouncing desperately on his cock. His knot has you locked into place and you’re barely able to move, but you can still swirl and grind your hips against him, feel the delicious friction of his knot against your entrance. “Alpha, it feels so good.”

“Fuck, look at you. So fucking knotdrunk, hmm? Can’t get enough.” Jeno shakes his head, laughs in a way that’s meant to mock you but it comes out strained. His hands are heavy on your ass, squeezing and slapping to feel the way it jiggles, to feel the way you clench around him with every hit. You throw your head back and let him do as he pleases, losing yourself entirely in how full you feel, in how good his knot feels in you. He buries his face into your chest, moving one hand from your ass to play with your tits, his mouth wasting no time in marking the delicate skin up. 

“Shit baby, gonna make me cum again.” His lips seal over your mating mark again in a sloppy kiss and that’s exactly the final push that you need, your eyes rolling back and your tongue lolling out as your cunt spasms around him, orgasm ripping through you almost painfully. Jeno groans as well, hand flying to your back to pull you as close as possible, and his knot pulses inside of you as you swear you feel more cum shoot out.

He shudders against you, tight grip finally relaxing, though he still keeps you anchored to his chest. You follow suit, collapsing against him. A tired moan leaves you and you let yourself relax, lips absentmindedly mouthing at his skin. His hand pets your back soothingly, touch heavy and sluggish, and the last thing you feel before you fall asleep is his lips on your forehead.

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