Tumgik
#like im dead. i wouldn't know
mwagneto · 3 months
Text
i keep thinking about this coz it's such a common trope in media but i can't even guess how common it is in real life so
205 notes · View notes
supjello · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
"Your son?" "My apprentice, but I think of him like a son."
#pentiment#andreas maler#casper ziegler#my art#it took me about two seconds to go full 'if anything happens to my beloved casper i'm killing everyone in this town and then myself'#'and then no one will be around to solve this murder mystery because we'll ALL be dead'#(some spoilers to at least where im at in the game>)#my andreas loved his son but found no love with his wife#(though he wanted to. he really wanted to.)#drifting off alone and finding this kind of 'what if' when he took casper on and began travelling#and it wasn't fair to anyone involved. not his wife who had to face loss alone#not andreas who was trying to cover up the hole august left with another family's son#not casper (though he wouldn't know this- since he didn't realize the extent andreas really cared about him like a father)#but most things went unspoken and most consequences unseen#so there was just this deep undercurrent of silent fatherly love and worry beneath every interaction#between the two#and it KILLS me even though i know 99% of this was me reading between the lines they let me choose#i wonder if my andreas kind of secretly wished casper's family didn't make it through the turmoil#it's a fucked up thought and i think he'd feel extremely guilty if he ever caught himself thinking it#but there's got to be some extreme dread there about the idea of the apprenticeship ending and this boy he considers a son cutting ties#and really having to face going back to his wife who he (rightfully) feels guilty about leaving.#even if she never loved him#and even if only pain was there to return to#ANYWAY#I FEEL TOTALLY NORMAL ABOUT ANDREAS MALER#edit: guess who just completed the game. guess who’s own art is now making herself SAD
563 notes · View notes
worstloki · 7 months
Text
sigyn that married loki like ages ago so when it comes out he's jotun she's like. 'well it's a bit late to do anything about that'
56 notes · View notes
quirkle2 · 3 months
Text
who wants zombie au writing. don't answer that ur getting it anyway (1.6k words)
His shoes knock against the old flooring of the house, wood creaking under rubber soles that slide over the woodgrain. He drags them a bit, lifts his limbs up no more than he strictly has to, and they lead him to the nearest sittable surface.
The couch is old and dusty and has likely gone untouched for months, much like everything else nowadays, so he watches the thin cloud of dust billow off the cushions largely with disinterest. He collapses into the fabric heavily, feels the whole thing scoot back an inch and hit the wall behind him. The sound echoes, carried by lifeless rooms, while he unceremoniously drops his backpack to the floor by his feet.
The breath he lets out is slow and methodical and born of pent up muscles, aimed at the ceiling where he rests his neck against the back of the couch and relaxes every limb one by one. It’s a process he forces himself through, if only to rid the constant ache beneath his skin.
Slow, sweeping footsteps meander around the room in front of him, and Ritsu angles his gaze down from his craned back position to look at his brother. He wanders, like he so often does—seemingly aimless, but there’s something procedural about it that he’s convinced he just hasn’t figured out yet.
Shigeo’s empty eyes crawl along the hearth of the fireplace, explosions of ash sprayed out across the red brick. His head tilts up to trace his attention around the angular lines of the television, hung on the wall and screen grey with dust. He flits back and forth between the roundness of the bricked mantle and the sharp edges of the screen, like he’s taking notes.
Shigeo paws the television. Four lines of muck are cleared. The zombie blinks, paws at it again with dusty, curious fingers. Ritsu watches him make a mess of the television screen in silence, blinking tiredly.
He almost closes his eyes, but he fights against the urge and moves his fingers down his lap to reach for his bag. His middle hooks around the loop at the top and he lugs it up and into his lap, where he unzips it and peers into the shadowy contents.
Ritsu fishes out the water bottles. He finds the one with the messy R scribbled along the cap in sharpie and takes a big swig of it. It’s warm going down, constantly insulated in a bag of old, sweaty clothes. He feels like he can taste the odor in it, but it clears the grain in his throat from stomping all over dirt roads today, so he’s still grateful.
He holds out the one labeled S to Shigeo. “Thirsty?”
Shigeo looks at him from where he’s crouched down to the floor now, inspecting the soot along the hearth. Unfortunately, he sees handprints in the black already, and when his brother reaches a hand out to take it, his palm is covered in soot.
He lets him have his fun and settles his own bottle back in the mess of tangled clothes and rolls of bandages. Ritsu rakes his fingers through their stock with no real purpose—he knows exactly what’s in here, and none of it is useful.
They’d been searching all day; Ritsu doesn’t really know how far they’d walked, but it had to be a lot of miles. In and out of stores, up and down empty houses, weaving between warehouses—they didn’t really stop for a break. Not when Ritsu can hear Shigeo’s stomach from here and he himself has shaking hands. They can’t afford a break.
Nothing, though. Not a single goddamn thing worth taking. A settlement must have come through here long ago and swept the highway. They’re in the countryside, where houses are spaced out acres from each other and there’s entire cow pastures between properties. And yet every house they’d seen and entered provided nothing.
Ritsu stares into the negative space in his bag where there should be supplies. His stomach cramps and if he smells another whiff of that godawful sweaty, bloody sweatshirt he still carries, he’s going to throw up bile.
He leans away from the open pouch, eyes wandering to his brother who draws… something into the soot of the hearth. His water bottle sits on the floor, abandoned and still unscrewed. Ritsu leans forward with great effort and a grunt, leaning over his bag to grab at the top of it.
It takes him two tries to get Shigeo’s attention, and one more for an answer on where the cap is. It’s then placed in his palm, covered in soot and also saliva. Ritsu swallows down the nausea that rolls up his throat and wipes it off with his frankly already disgusting sleeve, and screws it back on.
He leans back again, succumbing to the urge to let his eyes rest, and he listens to the very subtle swipe of his brother’s hands across brick. There’s birds outside, chirping, and even though it’s still very much a common occurrence, Ritsu cannot help but feel nostalgic about it.
If he ignores the awful hum of silence, and the distinct lack of an electric thrum throughout the walls, and the fact that this is a stranger’s couch and not his, he can almost imagine normalcy. He can almost say this feels like those quiet moments after school, when he settles on the couch and scrolls through his phone in a house that only holds him and his brother because their parents simply aren’t home yet.
He can almost hear the creak of wood from Shigeo walking around his room upstairs. He can almost tap his fingers on the couch cushions to the pattern of his brother making his way down the steps. He can almost hear the fridge opening, and the sound of milk being poured into glass.
Almost. But Ritsu listens to sharp silence instead, and he tries not to think too hard.
He drifts for a while, feels himself truly sink into the couch and let the cushions claim him, and he thinks about nothings because if he doesn’t, then he’ll lose it. He carefully sifts through the nothingness of his mind, through the passing thoughts that have no bearing, and he focuses on that, on the lack of substance. His head is too full of things that have too much substance.
He misses boredom. He tells himself he misses boredom—the complete insubstantiality of it—because if he lets himself think of what he really misses, it’ll drive him insane.
The cushions move, and Ritsu peels his eyes open and lets himself get pulled from liminal mindspace. The cotton in his head recedes, and he blinks, and then he’s swiveling his head to look at his brother who sits in the cushion right next to him.
His hands and the cuffs of his hoodie are smothered in black. Shigeo sits hunched, gaze still wandering even when there’s not much decoration in this house to look at. He studies the off-white walls, the chips in the paint, the holes drilled in where there maybe used to be photos hung.
Ritsu gazes at him quietly, chest instinctively rising and falling to match his brother’s rhythm. He watches the expansion there, under his hoodie, in the subtlety of the folds and the way they warp over the movement. It’s slightly quicker than what he’s used to, but Ritsu knows his brother’s heart rate is much slower. He’s felt it before. He’s listened to it before, with his ear against a chest.
Ritsu’s attention moves to his eyes, and the heavy bags underneath them, and the paleness of his pupils and the ghostlight of him underneath that. He stares into them, looks for stray, familiar thoughts that might enter his head. Looks for old memories that might shine through in the form of recognition when he sees furniture layouts, and candy wrappers, and ads for soda.
Ritsu looks for it all the time, that glint of familiarity. And he finds it, sometimes. And really, he thinks that’s keeping him going more than food ever will.
Shigeo turns his head, and looks at him. Sometimes, when his brother looks at him, there’s not much there. No substance, no anything. And Ritsu finds it a bit evil that he craves silence in his own head, and yet noise in Shigeo’s, and often times it is the other way around.
His brother looks at him now, though, with that comforting recognition. That growth of the pupils, that softening of the hard edges of his face where unknown stressors have gotten to him. Ritsu wonders what zombies get stressed out. He figures it’s the same deal with humans, considering they’re largely alike.
Ritsu wonders if Shigeo knows he’s sick. He wishes he could ask him. He wishes for a lot of things. Silence in his own head is one of them.
Ritsu swivels his head away and stares at the ceiling, if only to force the thoughts to pause. He studies the popcorn ridges above them, traces the peaks with his gaze. It calms him, gives him something to focus on. He looks for patterns in the shadows they make.
Shigeo shifts next to him. And then he shimmies down, settles into the cushions, and plops his head right down on Ritsu’s shoulder.
Static roars in his mind and his heart stammers. Ritsu swallows the lump in his throat but that just makes it bigger, so he clamps his mouth shut and breathes carefully through his nose.
The tears cut through the grime on his face. He plops his own head down against his brother’s, and lives in the noise.
23 notes · View notes
warlordfelwinter · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
deafening silence
just a quick little something before i go back to trying to get star baker (which would be The Funniest title for delphi to have and therefore i must have it, for the bit) cause i can't and won't stop thinking about how fucked this moment is for delphi. man who has become accustomed to the constant sensory input of a god suddenly has it revoked
27 notes · View notes
absolutelyzoned · 12 days
Text
hey chat do you guys ever have these thoughts about something awful happening and you know it's probably not true but like what if it was an then thats all you can think about
10 notes · View notes
aq2003 · 8 months
Text
series 3 is so frustrating because there is like a shining core of pure diamond underneath the problems . like conceptually it rocks so incredibly hard. but the problems
#dr who#i am being so honest when i say ten should have gotten on his knees and begged for simm!master's life#they should have framed the bit between him and martha's mom so different#like yes it is 10000% in character that the doctor with his bleeding heart and loneliness wouldn't want to kill him#even after everything that happened. because he's the only person he has left. 'i forgive you' was PERFECT.#but literally anyone else that suffered from what the master did. Deserves to rip him to shreds. so very obviously#and like i know.i KNOW that i am watching the 'funny immortal alien saves people through time and space' show#but i actually despise the doctor being framed as like an all powerful savior. or treated like one. even for a little bit. is Annoying#the first part of the series 3 finale having martha be humanity's last hope was SO GOOD bc it like kind of set her up as like#having to grapple with all that responsibility and attention like the doctor does. everyone's lives are in her hands. so crunchy#but when it like slides into 'everyone pls believe in our specialest boy in the world The Doctor <3' it just. falls flat#i feel like with a couple tweaks here and there in the execution and like actual fuckinnn people of color in the writer's room#series 3 would be PEAK media. but as it is it's just. falling short.#i do really appreciate martha deciding to leave ten on her own though. first of all. qpp down. second of all#she's realized that she can't keep traveling with him. bc (as i mentioned) hes someone who simultaneously needs saving#and refuses to be saved in the ways that matter. Yes im fucking ignoring the unrequited romance angle i think#it does a gigantic disservice to martha's character if u boil her down to that. fight me i dont care if that was the authorial intent#martha in the end is too kind to ten and ten keeps making her watch his meandering path of self destruction. toxic doomed qprism to ME.#anyway fuck. idk man series 2 consensus was that im dead inside and series 3 consensus is that the version i have of it in my head is peak#series 2 is better but i think because of my ten martha insanity i actually enjoyed watching series 3 more than series 2.#even if i got mad at it more than any other season. i think something is wrong with me. um. lmao#ten and martha#10 era
18 notes · View notes
hauntingblue · 1 month
Text
I THINK!! usopp and nami (and maybe others too) need to learn haki. They said you can't be in the new world without it because everyone is just so incredibly strong and here we are. They are getting headbutted to death and can't do anything about it (their abilities are being nerfed for the plot I know) but they could be SO GOOD if they could do something more idk.... we saw how strong nami was with zeus.... but she has fought with her bostaff before and that just disappeared... nami haki bostaff you will live in my dreams I guess
#jesus christ the blood#OH MY GOD!! KIKU!!!!!#WHY HER????????#episode 1005#WHY DO WOMEN HAVE TO SUFFER!!! TAKE ALL HER PAOM AND MAKE SANJI HAVE IT#SHINOBU!!!!!! YAMATO!!! DESTROY THEM!!!!!#rovin and chipper with a plank akdhass#hamlet and fourtricks lmaooo#now back to BEAUTIFUL WOMEN SUFFERING!!!! SHE IS NOT DEAD DONT MAKE THAT FACE!!!! OH SHE IS ALRIGHT#WOUND CAUTERIZING OMG!!!!! kaido just there watching ajdjakdjk AND SHE GETS UP TO FIGHT AGAIN!!! BADDEST BITCH IN WANO!!!!#now she cant do the oden nitoryuu#death makes humans whole..... you could have had your head cut off 10 minutes ago#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1006#im blaming sanji for kikus arm. if he had gotten there earlier he would have gotten the hit and a woman wouldn't have spilled her blood#APOO IS ALIVE AND KICKING AGAIN??? DIEEEEEE#episode 1007#you know its getting slow when the episode tags look like this lmao#zoro complaining how fighting apoo is a waste KILL HIM THEN!!! DECAPITATION!!!!#not only ZORO but DRAKE IS THERE TOO! APOO SHOULD BE QUARTERED ALREADY!!!!#NAMI!!!!!! ANOTHER BEAUTIFUL WOMAN SUFFERING AND AS ALWAYS SANJI IS NOWHERE TO BE SEEN!!! HYPOCRITE!!!!#this is why armor haki needs to be taught on the sunny. wdym nami can just get super hit. like come on. this is just self preservation#omg..... usopp brain fracture.... NAMI AVENGE HIM!!!#OMG NAMI WILLI#G TO DIEEE FOR LUFFYS DREAM!!! AND TAMAAA!!!!!!!! COMES AND SAVES HER!!!!!#usopp wanting her to lie and save herself but no..... damn and he wouldn't do it either#episode 1009#CARROT KICK HIS ASS!!!!! noooooooo :(((( i feel like we don't get enough of someone missing someone dead like this.... it's so good....#WANDA SULONG TOO?? LETS FUCKING GOOOO!!!! PEROSPERO SAY YOUR PRAYERS!!!!
6 notes · View notes
jamverse · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media
slapped some colors on older lines for artfight 👍
28 notes · View notes
stormyoceans · 2 years
Text
oh i just realized.. when i say i want vegas to wake up to an empty bed after having sex with pete and lose his mind over pete being gone, i want him to display heathcliff's levels of insanity after cathy dies in wuthering heights..... just vegas on his knees after wreaking havoc on everything in his room screaming his own version of "haunt me, then! [...] be with me always — take any form — drive me mad! only do not leave me in this abyss, where I cannot find you!"
201 notes · View notes
absolutebloodychaos · 6 months
Text
Tumblr media
8 notes · View notes
izzy-b-hands · 7 months
Text
im ngl i had a lil breakdown before my shower (which i took just before i went to bed to chill and watch the new eps) abt some thought-id-already-worked-all-thru-it irl stuff that resurfaced on me like trauma tends to and i just
it made everything in the show so. I don't know how to say it right. but i feel seen and understood and emotionally overwhelmed in a safe yet weird way, just like i did with a lot of s1 and I am Feeling So Much akdnfkgb (i cannot stress enough that this is a Good Thing and I'm absolutely thrilled and happy with the new eps and like. Going to be fine mentally I just gotta wrangle this like i have the times before.)
#text post#god i need a therapist that specialises in PTSD when i can afford therapy again#in the meantime recognition of the self thru the admired other while im in this state weirdly helps#makes me feel like im gonna burst out of my skin and I'm blasting metal in my ear buds to deal with that for now#gonna sleep eventually#i think lmao#im fine honestly bc like. this is not my first breakdown by any means but just. the fucking timing could not have been better#that said i both need a hug and absolutely could not handle being touched rn so that's something#no one's gonna read this far so im gonna just let myself have one little extra messy vent in that#my stupid fucking dad triggered part of this last one and I'm so mad abt it#he doesn't give two fucks abt me now (but he'd pretend to if he saw me in person bc jason LOVES keeping up appearances)#and he would just do a little nod and smile and talk over me telling him all that's happened this last year#i moved across the fucking country with help from friends so i wouldn't wind up dead in ND#and that's the thing i keep surviving and I dont understand why when I'm so often stressed and struggling to want to live#that and more has been sitting weighing and i just. want to tell him all of this and for him to be proud of me#he'll never be proud of me the way i want bc even my mum hasn't pulled that off#where they're proud of me as I am with no caveats or hiding parts of myself#if u think this is bad pls know i deleted a maximum tags tag essay/trauma dump just before this on this post lmao#i am In The Soup rn but it's gonna be fine#gonna rewatch s2 eps and be slightly but safely triggered by bits of ed and izzys stuff and get stoned and try to. process feelings#find some ptsd therapy worksheets online like dr. blohm suggested i try#forgive me the long tags and scroll by it fast if u want/need friends ill try to contain my current mess to this post & few others
7 notes · View notes
bunnie-bits · 8 months
Text
i wanna kis (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠) it's almost midnight ladies u know what that means .. (yearning hours)
#me n my friend got crossfaded n rly cozy and i wanted 2 cuddle but that wouldn't b appropriate btwn us (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠) i wouldn't#dare ask omg. but now i rly want someone 2 lay on my chest n hold them n give each other eepy kisses ₍ ᐢ. ̫ .ᐢ ₎#i also wasn't expecting company 2 day bc i didn't have the energy 4 stuff this wk and it's like (⁠。⁠ノ⁠ω⁠\⁠。⁠)#i don't wanna kick u out given ur night but i should be laying down rn (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠;⁠) either that or doin fuck all in the back lol#and so i brought us 2 the back n we smoked n talked in the dark‚ and got to trade ghost stories bc she also dealt w ghosts as a kid 0:#that was fun (❁´◡`❁) I'd been wanting to do that w her since i found out#it's nice having a friend who's been into horror since they were young too ╰( ̄ω ̄o) that talk was after watching 2 movies hehe#we saw evil dead rise n malignant 😈 and then talking abt spiritually in a non-religious sense then ghosts#and originally i was gonna get food but nah we used a coupon for 2 pizzas n got delivery it's been an extremely chill night and i needed it!#things have been so crazy this week with work omg. my weekend is probs gonna b uneventful (hopefully!) and i wanna b at home!!#just veg out n play bibyo gaym (⁠〒⁠﹏⁠〒⁠) and buy more bags of food for the squirrels n birds#these squirrels omg 😂 i work in the back and they know i give them food so they've been getting up on my lap sometimes like hello??#or i look over my laptop and fr see a squirrel just sitting in the chair across from me poking their head up over the table staring#i knoooow babies i know I'll get u ur food as soon as possible. omg and i have monday off?? i forgor ;u; !! n e ways I'm feeling good 2night#started out Yearning but (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠) what a great way to start my weekend. she called me just as i was wrapping things up w work :3#i can actually Breathe this weekend and I'm not exhausted (⁠ ̄⁠ヘ⁠ ̄⁠;⁠) nice.#im gonna go listen 2 my silly little music n go back 2 yearning hehe. but hiii a girl is Up now and im v stoned n in sleepover mode
10 notes · View notes
parameddic · 23 hours
Text
i had such a good and interesting characterisation thought re. TK in the context of replying to this ask but i don't remember what it was very clearly and so i'm just. sitting here. trying to trigger the same thought
#something something tk would believe/deny it blind. because the idea that a team (even a sub-sub-sub-team) could be betrayed that badly#just wouldn't enter his vocabulary of allowable events#it would not Occur to him that someone might have left the boys for dead like that#marjan would believe it. it would occur to her. she especially has the media literacy for it but also she is not a. cis white man#right? right? but i don't remember exactly how i wanted that point to come up in the newspaper thing and i don't know how i decided#the others were going to fall on that line and anyway#tk would not be UNWILLING to see it he just would miss it the first few times someone said it bc he would not#be expecting to see it. he Would Not be expecting to see it.#'vocabulary of allowable events' is a good way to put it good work me#who would do that? who would just Set Them Up?#that's not even. those details wouldn't be In. there's like Steps to this characterisation even appearing at all#it would not be a direct one-to-one conversation about it just a. note somewhere abstractly that even if it DID come up he wouldn't have#the tools to believe it. .... i am getting lost.#i know the thought is in there i just keep sitting down to write it and going ahhhhhh!#''aster could this not be a direct message'' yeah but i wasn't planning it to be a whole talking it out in the tags#and now they're all in the tags#and now u get this. love u squid#tbd#when i actually write the thing instead of sitting here. contemplating#plus also it . does not require a response im just out louding. cause it's neat!#it's about tk!#it's about who he is at his core including the messy and a little bit mean (accidentally) bits!#sighs sighs sighs sighs. i love him
2 notes · View notes
boysdontcryboycry · 4 months
Text
logs back into the stranger things fandom and suddenly everyone hates stranger things what da hell
4 notes · View notes
keira-draws · 1 month
Text
have officially watched 2/3 original evil dead movies 👍
2 notes · View notes