#like a piece of poop

[taikova]

nami's here to collect your debt! don't remember her too harshly, she keeps this family afloat.

#nami #one piece #one piece fanart #taiart #digital #i dont even want to tag zeus i did the bare minimum with him #the straw hats #nami best #edit: here we go now zeus looks abit less like a poop

[wetslug]

todays body had so much poop it kind of ruined my day. i wasnt mentally prepared

#like it just wouldnt stop i kind of wanted to cry #i weighed him before and after he lost 7kg total #1.4 of that was the brain (we keep the brain) and maybe another 100grams was stock bucket pieces #so i have to assume the other 5.5kg was just poop #to be honest i didnt get it all out but i kind of gave up and just wanted to stop

[kirigakureobsessed]

*SQUEALS*

#ieyasu is a piece of poop in saizos ES like damn bruh go see a therapist or smth #samurai love ballad party #slbp #slbp saizo

[usodeshou]

My dog is having the worst night of her life (or at least the worst since last year's New Year's Eve)

#still 3.5 hours to go until midnight #and it's already been almost 2 hours since people started randomly setting off fireworks outside #the entirety of her small frame is trembling and she's looking at me like she's begging me to make it stop #and I have to stay chill as best as possible although it doesn't really make much of a difference now #managed to take her outside to pee at least #but it's literally impossible to get even a few minutes without any loud bangs ripping through the quiet #she's in a loop of 'I need to go outside!' and 'no let's go back inside!!! 😨' #not expecting to be able to take her on any walks until 2-3 am 😮‍💨 #unless she needs to poop so urgently that it overrides her fear just long enough to get the deed done #I always forget exactly how stressful it is #for both of us #but at least I understand what's going on 😅 #doesn't help that my home town's situated in a valley so shit really echoes even from relatively far away #and I really hate firecrackers with a goddamn passion #somebody could shoot a gun into the sky on the street outside and it would be just as unpleasant a noise #my kitchen hood's been running for hours to drown out the noise from outside as much as possible and it did buy me some time early on #and makes it so that she doesn't hear every single piece of firework that goes off #been listening to music through my earphones to drown out the noise of the kitchen hood so I don't go crazy myself #3 more hours to go now #hoping that maybe there'll a bit of a break soon as the kids that got it out of their system before going to bed go to sleep #everyone else maybe deciding to wait until midnight to use up the rest #I just need 5 minutes #maybe even 10 #to let her outside #please #I am not relaxed at all and she surely notices that too and it's not helping #god what I would give for a soundproof room right about now #excuse me while I start ineffectually digging a bunker in the garden #🙈 #meanwhile my mom's cat is completely unfazed xD

[yin-yanglulu]

It’s almost time for my annual Rosen Family Chronicles rewatch….

#lulu.txt #if you don’t know what i’m talking about #I’m talking about a series of Michael Rosen YTPs #that have a overarching story #it sounds stupid but it’s really well made! #it’s in the simalar vain of stuff like The Rosen Venture (another Rosen poop series) #but with waaay less sex jokes #which is why I think it’s better #bc I only like a few bits of pieces of Rosen Venture #the rest is just shit that hasn’t aged well or wasn’t even funny in the first place #and no the tone of Rosen Family Chronicles isn’t serious it’s incredibly silly #half the cast is just Zelda CDI people and Michael Rosen clones #still waiting on the series finale #bc the last episode was almost a year ago #I’m patient enough to keep waiting tho

[catrinkets]

i like when you walk into home depot and the smell of plywood and random tools and shit hits you.. it’s a beautiful smell

#Id love to be. a Piece of plywood #Everything smell so good except for the aisle that smelled like literal poop and the paint ones

[falinscloaca]

in that “i’ve been reading a lotta medieval beastieries and laughing to myself at how many times its literally just antisemitic lately” kinda mood

#theres a bird who lives in a human poop nest and eats the poop and looks a bit like peter lorre with a bowl cut #the book is actually fucking great 10/10 works excellent as a companion piece for even modern religious fundamentalists relationship with sc #science

[familyabolisher]

I've walked past the Barbie branded selfie booth, sat through the reel of old commercials that precede the previews, and watched Margot Robbie learn to cry, and I’m still not sure what “doing the thing and subverting the thing,” which Greta Gerwig claimed as the achievement of Barbie in a recent New York Times Magazine profile, could possibly mean. This was the second Gerwig profile the magazine has run. I wrote the first one, in 2017, which in hindsight appears like a warning shot in a publicity campaign that has cemented Gerwig’s reputation as so charming and pure of heart that any choice (we used to call them compromises) she makes is justified, a priori, by her innocence. This is a strange position for an adult to occupy, especially when the two-hour piece of branded content she is currently promoting hinges on a character who discovers that her own innocence is the false product of a fallen world. But—spoiler alert!—the point of Barbie’s “hero’s journey” is less to reconcile Barbie to death than to reconcile the viewer to culture in the age of IP.

“Doing the thing and subverting the thing”: I haven’t finished working out the details, but I think the rough translation would be Getting rich and not feeling feel bad about it. (Or, for the viewer: Having a good time and not feeling bad about it.) One must labor under a rather reduced sense of the word “subvert” to be impressed with poking loving fun at product misfires such as Midge (the pregnant Barbie), Tanner (the dog who poops), and the Ken with the earring, especially given that the value of all these collectors’ items has, presumably, not decreased since the film opened. Barbie may feature a sassy tween sternly informing Robbie’s Stereotypical Barbie that the tiny-waisted top-heavy billion-dollar business she represents has made girls “feel bad” about themselves, but if anyone uttered the word “anorexia,” I missed it. (There was a reason Todd Haynes told the story of Karen Carpenter’s life and death with Barbies, and it wasn’t because an uncanny piece of molded plastic has the magical power to resolve the contradictions of girlhood and global capitalism.) There’s a bit about Robbie going back into a box in the Mattel boardroom, but Barbies aren’t made in an executive suite; they come from factories in China. On the one hand, it’s weird for a film about a real-world commodity to unfold wholly in the realm of ideas and feelings, but then again, that’s pretty much the definition of branding. Mattel doesn’t care if we buy Barbie dolls—they’re happy to put the word “Barbie” on sunglasses and T-shirts, or license clips from the movie for an ad for Google. OK, here’s my review: When Gerwig first visited Mattel HQ in October 2019, the company’s stock was trading at less than twelve dollars a share. Today the price is $21.40. 

Christine Smallwood, Who Was Barbie?

#currently reading #sorry for not being The Ignorer re: bad IP film but this is good

[magnus-and-the-dragon]

today is one of those days that i am acutely aware how fucking limited i am by anxiety and ibs and it’s just so FRUSTRATING

#there is an event i am volunteering about today #that i am genuinely SO FUCKING EXCITED ABOUT! #ALL OF MY FAVORITE THINGS ALL TOGETHER! #like i should be in the absolute best mood rn!!! #except all i’ve thought of for the last two days is how to make sure i don’t shit myself at this event #like it is just! so! exhausting! to have to constantly be SO AWARE of my body #and to constantly have to know where the three closest bathrooms are bc if my stomach starts bubbling i have Minutes to find one #like i’ve been obsessive about what i’ve eaten for two days #woke up early to eat the blandest breakfast possible #will be taking two differebt anti diarhea meds and wearing strategic clothes for if by some horrible twist of fate i have an issue #and i’m STILL so fucking AFRAID! and also will be goddamn starving by the time the event is over #because i absolutely cannot eat anything while i am out and about with limited bathroon access!!! #it. is. EXHAUSTING. #i should just be having f u n today and all i’m thibking about is POOP #and oh #also #my brain is gnawing itself into pieces over not knowing where or how to park #so all in all we’re just thriving over here 😐

[newttxt]

the best way to luffy’s stomach is through his heart (or something like that)

a four page one piece fancomic in which luffy and law talk about luffy’s stomach

page 1

panel 1: a top view of luffy and law sitting in grass. luffy is leaning back on his hands with his legs outstretched. law sits crosslegged between them. they are both looking down at the hole in luffy’s abdomen, where law has used his devil fruit power to remove his stomach. “whoa! cool!” says luffy, while law hums, “hmm… interesting.”

panel 2: a close-up of law’s hand holding luffy’s stomach in its cube-like container. “it looks surprisingly average,” law says, “for a bottomless pit.”

panel 3: “isn’t it weird?” luffy asks. he is sitting with his back to the viewer, but his smile is still visible as he leans into law’s space. law is still crosslegged, holding the stomach, and he looks vaguely uncomfortable as luffy keeps talking. luffy says, “that thing can make food stop looking like food and start looking like poop! huh. wonder how it does that…”

page 2

panel 1: law looks off to the side, sweating and kinda grouchy. knowing he’ll regret this, he mutters, “i… know how… at least for NORMAL humans.”

panel 2: the back of luffy’s head takes up most of the panel as he demands, “what?! i wanna know too!” law grits his teeth and shouts back, “you’re just gonna fall asleep!” and luffy yells, “nuh-uh!”

panel 3: luffy grins widely, throws his arms out to the side, and flops onto his back in the grass. he’s loudly yelling, “tell me! tell me, traffy!”

page 3

panel 1: law is visible from a low-angle, as if from luffy’s pov on the ground. he sighs, “fine. here’s how it works.”

panel 2: this panel looks similar to the previous, but its slightly darker, with gray bars at the top and bottom, narrowing visibility to show luffy’s eyes are closing. law continues, “the stomach has two main functions.”

panel 3: law is now barely visible through the gap. luffy is almost asleep. law says, “the first, as YOU know, is the storage of food.”

panel 4: the background is completely dark, and law’s words trail off, “the second is—“

page 4

panel 1: a large, top view of luffy lying on his back in the grass. his arms are thrown wide still and his eyes are open. he has just jolted awake, saying, “hmm?” off-screen, law complains, “i don’t know WHY i bothered.”

panel 2: law accuses, “you didn’t listen to a word i said.” luffy sits up, his lips pursed and eyes narrowed because he’s a terrible liar. he says, “sure i did,” dragging out the “sure.”

panel 3: luffy breaks into a grin and proudly declares, “it’s a mystery!” law cuts him off with a “NO,” his speech bubble literally dripping with disdain.

panel 4: the silhouette of luffy and law sitting side by side. law is whapping luffy on the head with a light fist. law says, “idiot…” before bonking him. luffy yells, “hey!” but he is laughing, and a small “heh” shows law is too.

#one piece #luffy #trafalgar law #look im just gonna tag it #lulaw #it doesnt have to be but its what i was thinking when i drew it so. #cw body horror #??? ever so slightly #law-typical gore i suppose #he stuck it back in when luffy dozed off. maybe thats what woke him up #anyway. sometimes ur so close to someone that theyll let u look at their organs for fun! #typically its stomach > heart but for luffy its the other way around #not that he keeps his organs very close to his chest. which is a weird thing to say. what AM i saying anymore

[cowboyishbabe]

One thing abt sporadically pet sitting is even with the more stressful animals (they aren’t ever stressful. Its just the poop. The poop situations are always stressful) it’s always somewhat cathartic to just sit with an animal in silence for a few hrs

#one time when dog sitting the pup who moved away. i took his sister outside bc she was being a loud mouth. he refused to come to the yard. #and when i came back in he was hiding in the bedroom and there was poop on the living room carpet #with the big ol baby whose new to my roster she pooped from the dining room all the way to the back of the kitchen. HORRIBLE #AND THEN! with my other pups. one of them wouldn’t sleep upstairs so i let her be free at night. woke up before sunrise and went downstairs #stepped directly on a piece of poop at the last stair. #its literally always a poop incident tht they would likely never pull with their humans #but! pet sitting is still my fav. #s talks #also i hope more ppl leave town in the next few weeks bc! i wanna hang out with more dogs #not having my own is in fact the worst

[lyekisses]

i really think somebody or something put a curse on me

#like….there was another tiny piece of poop on the ground today #granted it was near the baby changing area not ON THE WALL #but still #is this my karma #for my thot crimes….for ****** * ***** #it must be!

[krakkenchaos]

YouTube poops are legitimately, unironically, provably art. Yes there are the rare ones like Awful Fawful's "Deliver Us" that are undeniably artistic in a conventional sense, but even the low-effort garbage that's just dick jokes and Mario saying fuck is inherently making a statement against the concept of copyright and intellectual property. It's saying that as soon as a piece of media is put out into the world, it belongs to everyone and can be twisted into any abomination possible no matter how much the rights-holders try to control and sanitize it. Nintendo wants you to forget the CDI Zelda games ever existed? Too bad, Morshu and King Harkinian are now more iconic than any of the new characters Nintendo has tried to push in the last decade. Warner Bros wants to crank out yet another soulless Scooby Doo reboot? Good luck giving it a single line as memorable as "I'll swooce right in!" or "if he's out here and we're in there and he's the sheriff and we're out here then I wanna know where's the caveman?"

#ytp #youtube poop #skooks #zelda cdi

[mellowsadistic]

"What am I wearing?!" Tracy shrieked, getting up on her knees and goggling at the disposable diaper strapped tightly around her waist. Her head felt funny. Why was she in bed? The last thing she remembered was Sabrina, her stepdaughter-to-be, giving her something to drink, and then...

"Ah, you're awake!" came a young woman's voice. "Did you enjoy your little nap, Tracy?"

Tracy looked up to see Sabrina standing over her, a mocking smile on her face. "Sabrina?" She still felt a little confused and disoriented, but she didn't like the expression on the girl's face at all. "What's going on?" she demanded. "What did you..." She thought back to that moment in the kitchen, when Sabrina had unexpectedly offered to make her morning coffee. "Did you drug me?!" she screeched. "And why did you put me in a fucking diaper?"

Sabrina's smile widened. "If my Dad wants to get remarried, fine," she said matter-of-factly. "But it's not going to be to some vapid bimbo who's only after his wallet."

Tracy flushed. So what if she was only after Sabrina's father for his money? He was in his sixties or something. If he wanted a hot young trophy wife, what was wrong with that? And if she ended up divorcing him after a year or so and taking half of his fortune, it would be his own stupid fault for being so naïve.

"Unfortunately," said Sabrina, "Dad's been totally taken in by your seductive little schemes, so it's up to me to protect him." Her eyes glittered dangerously. "It's up to me to make sure he'll never be attracted to you again."

"What are you..." But Tracy suddenly gasped, a manicured hand flying to her mouth, as she felt a tiny trickle of pee leak into her Pampers. She tried to clamp down on the flow, but nothing happened. The trickle stopped after only a few seconds, but it was enough to make the padding between her legs feel disgustingly warm and wet, and more to the point, it had been completely out of her control. “What did you do to me?!" she squealed, repulsed by the sensation of piss soaking into her pants and pressing against her pussy.

"You really are stupid, aren't you?" Sabrina laughed. "Isn't it obvious, you dumb whore? I made you incontinent. Or is that word too big and complicated for you? Would it be easier to understand if I told you that you'll never use the little girl's room again?"

Tracy stared at her, open-mouthed, too stunned and horrified to speak. She couldn’t be incontinent. She couldn’t be. It wasn't possible to just take someone's control away!

"I added a special ingredient to your latte this morning," Sabrina explained, as if reading her mind. "A little something I found online. A few drops are enough to cause total and permanent incontinence, though I promise you it's quite untraceable, so don't bother running to the police to whine about how your boyfriend's meanie daughter stole your potty training. I made sure not to leave any evidence, and you'll just sound crazy."

Tracy felt as though she'd been doused in icy water. If Sabrina was telling the truth, if she really was incontinent, then she'd never be able to seduce a man again! Her stomach rolled as she imagined trying to persuade Sabrina's father to buy her a new pair of shoes, clutching his arm and rubbing her breasts against his chest, only to feel her diaper drooping between her legs as she pooped in it without warning. She'd be a joke!

Sabrina was smirking. "Are you getting it now, you gold-digging trollop? Your homewrecking days are over. Men aren't going to look twice at you when they find out about your little potty-pants problem. The kind of guys you're after want a hot piece of ass, not a diapered one, and without your sex appeal you're nothing but an overgrown brat. But you should know, there are men out there who are into girls that need diapers. Maybe you could find one of them to look after you? Of course, it wouldn't be the kind of glamorous lifestyle you'd hoped for... It would be a life of spankings, early bedtimes, messy highchair feedings, and begging your Daddy for diapie changes. But hey, at least you wouldn't have to work!"

#mellowsadistic

[goodlouse]

pooped like 5 times in a single day the other day n also keep thinking abt the videos of cats pursing their lips when they shit. that is the inspiration for this piece. thank you [likes<rbs&follows]

#Illustration #my art #artists on tumblr

[stellaaarree]

some atsv characters with a reader that dresses bimbo, w/ the makeup and nails ect :)

MIGUEL

instantly your gonna get called “diva”.

loves the opposites looks though

he pays for all your expensive mini skirts.

insert miguel’s shocked face. “mi amor?! this skirt is the size of a belt! £35 for a piece of stripped fabric?? dios mío.” he groans, swiping his card at the register.

will just lean in the door way watching you do your makeup. loves it nowhere near as much as your natural face but if you’re happy hes ecstatic (secretly. we all know he has to keep the badass exterior.)

occasionally pulls your skirt down a little so it’s covering more. that place is only for him to see >:(!

sugar daddy vibes. dropping you off at the nail salon and picking you up all fancy with your starbucks order in hand😚😚

MILES

is way too scared to touch you in fear of messing up your pretty hair or makeup.

ADORES EVERYTHING.

something about you getting cold in your skimpy pink outfit and his black hoodie is going over your shoulder gets him giggling. everyone knows it’d have to be his.

asks his parents for money so he can pay for your nails😭😭

you assure him that he doesn’t have to pay and when he’s not allowed money he’s the one that swipes your card so it looks like its his. delusional king.

will 100% have your starbucks order memorised and when he hears you say for the first time just pauses with a “…how did you say all of that in the span of ten seconds?..”

brags 100%. if he has his other friends round his place and you’ve left one of your bright pink shirts there will go, “oh! sorry guys don’t mind the pink shirt over there.” knowing damn well he doesn’t wear pink..nor baby tees.

GWEN

you’re the reason she dyed the ends of her hair pink. always has a bit of your sweetness around🫶🏻

shopping sprees!!! then after y’all go to mcdonalds and she’s tucking napkins over your shirt so the sauce doesn’t ruin it.

feeding you fries so your lipstick doesn’t smudge.

genuinely just loves to be up close with you.

she’s taking out your perfectly clipped and bumped up hair at the end of the day. being oh so gentle as your head falls asleep by her shoulder.

when you go to her place she empties out all the things she feels you’d like from her closet and now you have your own drawer. spare makeup, hair clips, a mini straightener and her brightly coloured hoodies and jumpers.

y’all share socks. shut up its cute!!!!!!!

she’s got ones with stars scattered on them and you’ve got hearts on yours.

HOBIE

as we’ve noted, he doesn’t believe in consistency so the stark contrast between you two is adorable.

always holding your hand, thumb going over the 3d details on your nails.or he’s straight up staring at the glittery gloss as you talk while making hand gestures.

‘darlin’ and doll’ are now your new names.

you give him hair inspo and he gives you hair inspo😭😭

has a special pink guitar pic that he uses when you’re around!!!!

absolutely enamoured with your nails, you know the questions coming. the dreaded question.

when y’all are comfy, cuddling he speaks the dreaded moment. “doll, …how’d you wipe your arse with those.” and the cute moment is ruined. you obviously where not gonna share your struggles so you hit him back with the “girls don’t poop, idiot.”

PETER B PARKER

when you babysit mayday she always comes back with painted nails + toes. peter always having the same question. “how’d you get her to stay still for that long?!” with a smile you reply. “she makes exceptions for her favourite.”

if you guys are eating and sauce or something gets on your painted lips, he doesn’t even mention it. just straight away wiping it off and going back to the conversation at hand.

is the main funder for your clothes.

miguel and him fight over it all the time. miguel’s usual comeback “spoil your own kid! this ones mine!” and peter rolling his eyes.

peters the kinda guy to fund your usual things. his price range going from £5 - £25. as it happens more oftens.

miguels on the other hand. £35 - £200. and it obviously is a rare occasion.

to give extra thanks to peter you’d kiss his cheek. leaving a pink kiss stain behind and him proudly showing it off.

obsessed with the style. he’s a pretty chill guy so when asking you to come down to the store with him and you walk out in full glam, plans change. “yeah, no, we’re going to dinner instead. cmon pretty.” there was no option that was an order😭

you guys ended up stealing the pink coasters at the restaurant.

BONUS!! you’re maydays personal stylist. nails, done, hair? done, needing an outfit? done. and she sits still and pretty the whole time. completely shocking everyone else how you’ve kept her quiet. she just focuses on your pretty glittered eyelids as your big fluffy lashes bat at her sweetly🫶🏻🫶🏻

you after atsv spoils you rotten😭😭

#miguel ohara #miguel o'hara #miguel ohara x reader #miguel o’hara #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara x y/n #miguel o’hara x you #miguel x reader #spiderman #miles morales #miles molares #atsv x reader #atsv miguel #atsv fic #atsv gwen #atsv miles #atsv hobie #atsv #spiderman atsv #punk spiderman #spider gwen #hobie fanart #hobie spiderverse #hobie my beloved #hobie brown #gwen stacy #peter b parker #drabble #mayday #peter benjamin parker