#lie to get the job

[cemeterything]

my 5 year plan is i find a weird egg and bond for life with the dragon that hatches from it

#🐉 #got rejected again today and im reaching the end of my rope i wont lie #← from a job. but im also not getting bitches.

[sualne]

think i might've entered the "straight up an oc" phase

#monkey d luffy #my art #described in alt text #secret modern au #modern au luffy.. he's a runaway. he's a couch surfer. he can't keep a job. he's a model. he's a sugar baby. he beats up ppl in bars. #he doesn't even drink. everyone's obsessed with him. you never get to read his pov because he's up for interpretation. #he's sus but can't even lie. i dont know how we got there.

[gertritude-art]

having a good one

#its me #doodle #i feel like that naruto mental illness post telling myself 'if martin blackwood can lie and get a job at the magnus institute then -'

[cinnamontoads]

does anyone else with autism have a really hard time “faking it”… not like masking in general but stuff like being able to pretend you like a bad gift or make stuff up for a school assignment or hype yourself up for a job interview. like i’ve only started noticing it more recently for myself but i’m literally incapable of being dishonest in situations like that i can’t control it

#personal #my parents are always like you just Fake It be nice to people you don’t like lie about job interviews make stuff up for assignments and just #get it done and i CANT and they don’t understand???? #like i can do little white lies fine in most situations i’m not the most honest person on the planet earth but #in certain scenarios i physically cannot do things

[suddenly-frankenstein]

POV you are a dead head

#and you should get a job in a sideshow #i hella LOVE this toxic green acrylic paint wanna eat it like a jam #(and i actually did but this always happens during the drawing process and i sad to say that acrylic is absolutely untasteful) #life is a lie #reanimator #herbert west reanimator #herbert west #reanimator fanart

[windandwater]

Ed + being a whole adhd mood, part 2 (part 1)

note: first, this isn't a diagnosis, only a very familiar pattern. also I know that we have contextual clues to hint that breaking the record was about more than boredom, but. that is such an adhd line.

#our flag means death #ofmd #ofmdedit #ofmd season 2 #my gifs #made by me #ed teach #blackbeard #we will not be discussing how boredom/under-stimulation intersects with depression when you have adhd #how you do impulsive self-destructive things and lie to yourself about why #we will not be doing that #the picture looks like me and I will not be looking at it #in funnier news the number of times I've gone 'I should get a job doing this' after enjoying one (1) thing is absurd #I'm looking in a fucking mirror is what I'm saying

[delphinidin4]

I am allergic to the word "success". I have been ever since middle school, when it was plastered all over the planners the school gave us.

Screw success. Try for contentment.

#success #life #advice #istg success is short for be a good little capitalist minion #school wants you to succeed because if you get higher scores they get more funding #jobs want you to succeed because the faster and better you work the better for their bottom line #the word success has become code for buying into the lie that the most important things in life are money and your job #that everybody should care about business first and foremost #that winning is more important than trying #and trying is only good if it eventually leads to winning #fuck that #the purpose of life it's not success #the point of life is to live it.

[skunkes]

i may be stupid

#(but im not sure) #a doodley #i am not going to lie to you guys i am insanely scared of anti depressants. and adjacent medication. #first of all like ive said i dont think i need them #im doing way better than last yr(s) despite being in the same circumstances. i did in fact will my brain to get it together. #i told my doctor i think my issues are a result of my environment and that is what i think it is. #i dont think meds cld help change my innate personality flaws #second of all sorry but my ****** is all i have i cant risk losing it to the side effects #idk! like. idk. you guys really dont get it it really is just laziness for me #since i was a kid i just didnt have Goals and its continued to my detriment #i was also raised to doubt all my decisions so here we are #im sure my friends think im lazy bc what ive described to them IS laziness #im like the only person i know without hashtag goals and life motivation...and all my friends have mental health stuff too #so its not that...! its personality. its laziness #its literally like the ''my son is 35 and refuses to get a job and does nothing all day'' reddit posts #with ''he's not depressed he's lazy you should just kick him out and refuse to keep providing for him'' comments and all

[shesmore-shoebill]

Something I do admire about Amanda and todays 2T1L really drove home is that like. At least part of the reason she's so disconnected from online shit is because she's just too busy being outside doing shit. Like drunkenly stealing pineapples. Partying. And having 3 million jobs. Living her life. etc. She really was "outside talking to trees" and thats why she didn't know who Harambe was.

#the jokes about her offline are funny but whenever people interpret it as like 'amanda as a sheltered shut in' its like. #have u heard her talk about her life. she doesnt get memes because she was too busy being outside #smosh #amanda lehan canto #angela giarratana #2t1l #god this whole 2 truths one lie was SO GOOD theyre such good friends #genuinely though shes living/lived life! i respect that immensely. good for her #like she is ALSO hilariously offline #but we should all respect that shes had a million jobs and done a ton of travel. While being offline.

[teecupangel]

I've been checking this game called Shipwrecked 64 and there's this section in the game where you use something like the Eagle Vision and you could use it for the rest of the game in some areas, I wanna see your thoughts on this because the entire time I was thinking of AC

You know what would be fun, nonny?

If we set up the core setting of Shipwrecked 64 to a game that Abstergo developed and released for a limited time.

It was meant to be the Entertainment Division’s first game using a prototype VR system that would later be developed as the Animus gaming console (that’s what they tell the public but it’s not true. The VR system was created using the Animus as the base but they later scrapped it and just modified the Animus).

But the game itself was in development hell for so long, only later having a limited release after the Animus’ first game (Liberation) proved to be successful. It came with a 10% discount voucher that the players can use when preordering Abstergo Entertainment’s next game “Pirates of Nightmare”.

Of course, because this is Abstergo and they’re scummy, the voucher is only available for PREORDER and will expire the moment the game is released.

The game wasn’t even given a digital release with Abstergo going for the physical copy first then just… never bothering to do a digital release because they were betting that Pirates of Nightmares would be so successful no one would remember that weird short 2D platformer that Abstergo released between two major games.

And it sorta worked.

The game wasn’t even played all that much. It was cheaper because it was short and the controls were clunky as it was created for the prototype. Abstergo only did the bare minimum to port it to the latest Animus gaming console and players can’t even access it IF they have one of the newer models (specifically the models released for “Triumph of the Borgias” onward) because it’s not backwards compatible.

Then… a Game Preservation group called “Shipwrecked 17 Recovery Crew” released an emulator that can play it even for the latest model of the Animus gaming console. They released it for free with the emulator saying “if you enjoy this game, please consider donating to the [a link that takes people to one of the site that archives all video games with a list of video games that have not been archived or preserved yet]”. There’s no request for monetization at all so Abstergo isn’t exactly keen on trying to take it down less they suffer a backlash from players who would say “you’re not even rereleasing it so why are you taking down a passion project from fans???”

The emulator also notes that it fixed some of the codes so there should be less bugs and would provide a more ‘complete’ experience.

The setting of the game is quite simple. The player plays as Shipmate 0, the captain of the Ship (no name was given so fans call it ‘ship’). The Ship suffered terrible damage during a severe storm on the sea and Shipmate 0 wakes up in an island and the goal of the player is to find all ‘16’ shipmates that are stranded in the island (with each having their own minigame, of course).

The normal ending would be getting all ‘16’ shipmates safely in a newly repaired Ship.

Most players assumed that it’s called Shipwrecked 17 because Shipmate 0 is counted as one of the shipmates so, in total, there are 17 shipmates.

Then… some starts looking at the code.

And they post the comments on a function called Golden_Ending().

// Unlock Subject 17. // Requirement: kill all 16 Subjects.

They believe the ‘Subject’ are the shipmates and the morbid requirement fascinated some players. Other players do not that “kill” has a different meaning in codes so maybe it’s not actually killing the shipmates ingame.

Then one player realized that they can kill Shipmates using specific methods during the minigame portion. This player unintentionally found this out while he was doing the tag minigame with Shipmate 4 (the duck). The game had been simply chasing Shipmate 4 until he takes a short rest and reaching him during that short rest. BUT if a player was to use their left hand while chasing Shipmate 4 (not during short rest) and the distance is an arm’s length or shorter, the game glitches for a moment and Shipmate 0 actually tackles Shipmate 4, staying oon top of Shipmate 4 as he slumps down.

After that, a short audio of an older sounding man and a woman are played by the screen glitches to show Shipmate 4’s profile window (where it says the actual name of Shipmate 4 is Daniel the Duck) talking about how unstable ‘Daniel’ was becoming and prolonged sessions on the Animus only had minimal effect on helping him stabilize his mind.

The glitch ends with the profile showing a different profile for a fraction of a second and it was only after a few more people tried the method and recorded their playthrough so they can take a screenshot of it later on that the players found out the second profile was the ‘session’ records of a Daniel Cross, complete with dates and summary of each session.

And now, Abstergo is trying to get everyone to stop playing, saying that the game has been tampered with or that someone modified it to include such morbid things, it was meant to be a kids’ game!

People barely cared. The mystery and the ‘horror’ were more interesting than the whole “help these animal-ish creatures get off the island”. Streamers started playing it, trying to find ways to kill the other Shipmates…

They learn new things along the way…

Like how Shipmate 15 is actually pregnant and the way to kill her is… well… morbid. Shipmate 16 can only be killed by chasing him into a specific trap that will cut him to pieces.

Every time they manage to kill a Shipmate, they are transferred to an empty bar with the walls slowly being filled with the pictures of the ‘Subjects’ that appear after killing the Shipmate, including Daniel the Duck, Robert the Rabbit, Clay the Cuckoo, etc…

Then when all 16 Shipmates are killed, they return to the bar once more but it’s now burning and there’s a Dog ‘Shipmate’ in front of them.

The final Shipmate.

The key to the Golden Ending.

#golden ending means the best ending #but in this case #it’s a lie #the golden ending means #getting desmond’s animus data #who made the game? #who emulated it? #no one is sure #the game itself was released by mistake #but it was because of juno’s cult #by the time the emulator version was released #juno’s cult had already been destroyed #is it an erudito x assassin job? #is it a disgruntled abstergo employer? #is it the supposedly dead elijah? #or is it… something else? #shrug #assassin's creed #ask and answer #teecup writes/has a plot #fic idea: assassin's creed #desmond miles #tagging desmond miles since he is the main point of the golden ending XD

[kimbapisnotsushi]

semi 🤝 suga

their coworkers not believing they have famous (?) boyfriends in another country

#semi eita #semiten #sugawara koushi #oisuga #haikyuu #haikyuu!! #haikyuu hcs #sou says stuff #SEMITENS COME GET IT #i put a question mark bc i'm not really sure if tendou is famous #but he appeared on tv which means something #i'm just saying i think it'd be really funny for semi and suga #two of the characters who ended up with the most general everyday jobs #that would presumably have no connections to anyone famous #especially not in their small silly little corner of miyagi #and work with other prefectly normal boring everyday people #to have famous bfs in other countries bc that would just be ASTOUNDING to their coworkers #suga's coworkers think it's a lie so he can worm out of the blind dates they try to set up with him #semi's coworkers think he's just messing around bc let's be real #a chocolatier is a pretty randomn choice of a partner

[eightdoctor]

it’s so funny reading through the edas where the 8th doctor is this endlessly complex and magical figure whose intentions you can never quite parse before going to one of the later big finish audio boxsets like stranded where they flattened his characterization like a bug

#same applies to early big finish like he was so good thereeee #you had audios like caerdroia delving into the depths of his psyche through silly hijinks #and then strandeds got what. the doctor going on a game show to win money because he’s too incompetent to get an actual job #or do anything else remotely helpful #it’s literally character assassination #dw being rebooted was the worst thing to ever happen to the eighth doctor i shan’t lie #like at this point he’s only being propped up by liv and helen #without them the character would topple like a house of cards #doctor who #eighth doctor #edas

[figofswords]

the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something

#WHAT AM I DOING!!!! #i get up i go to my stupid retail job i stick labels on bags they pay me fucking thirteen bucks an hour i come home i lie on the couch #too tired to draw in too much pain to go anywhere no energy to reach out to college friends to do anything fun #no idea where the even start with getting an industry job no clue what i even WANT at this point #trying to remember what i loved so much about comics i want it BACK i HATE this #WHAT IS THE POINT!!!! WHAT DO I WANT WHERE AM I GOING!!! WHAT COMES NEXT!!!!!! #there's no clear career trajectory i can't do freelance i need structure i can't work too much i need free time #my brain doesn't work every job requires me to move across the country the irs just took fucking three hundred stupid dollars from me #my friends live in different states i can't get a job without experience i can't get experience without a job #i can't work on my portfolio with no energy and no time and i dont have any money and everything is so expensive all the time #i can't get anywhere bc i dont drive and im too stressed to think about taking driving lessons again #and WHAT DO I WANT! #THE MOST INTERESTING THING I DO EVERY WEEK IS GO TO PHYSICAL THERAPY! #I AM EXCITED EVERY WEEK FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!! WHY!!!!!!!! #anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed #delete later #i got into spx. today. so. had to have a crisis about how i felt when i attended spx (energized. excited. a part of something. ambitious) #versus how i feel now (tired. unmotivated. kind of apathetic about art. disconnected) #i dont miss the stress of school but i miss being around other artists. ppl who speak your language and who want the same things you want #ppl who are excited abut art and that makes YOU excited about art. ppl who get you #i miss that i want that back #whatever. its 1am i gotta go shower i have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow. wahoo. $13.50/hr lets go

[imflyingfish]

An older base design, brought forwards to a new server! ^_^

#fish builds #mineblr #minecraft builds #minecraft #im a right fan of this one not even going to lie #christ theres some roadman #anyway i may update this more later on but hey. for a starter base its pretty cute and it'll get the job done #actually this is on a spanish server! #i dont speak spanish. #help.

[warped-paranoia]

#i don't have anything to post rn #except for my kpop doodles. so #2023 skz art dump #i've been having a lot of fun with their music not gonna lie #even bought an album. i've never done that before #what is happening to me bro. i'm mortified #han this is for you #going straight to bed after this post. writing tags is too tiring. posting something here is a full-time job and i'm getting fired! #stray kids #stray kids fanart #skz #skz fanart #han #han jisung #lee know #seungmin #kim seungmin #2min #skzoo #leebit #украрт #укртамблер #укртумбочка #darium_art

[theywontletmebeprincipal]

"we need more female failures n deadbeat women" you guys can't even handle dr alphys

#fake girlfailure enjoyers when a real womandisappointment walks in.... #I'm obsessed with her she's so shit at her job #she didn't even get it legitimately she had a ghost possess a box n lie about being a robot #I need you all to understand. asgore hired alphys bc he thought she invented a way to create a soul from nothing #when in reality her 'new being' was the fantasy equivalent of an adult putting a box on their head to convince a small child they're a robo #thats so funny thats so fucking funny #not to even mention the whole true lab debacle #but despite that. she's a hero when it matters most. I love her #get behind me dr alphys I'll protect you #sanders bullshit #undertale