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n1cholaswang · 2 years

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HEAVEN — CJU

idol!jiung x nonidol!genderneutral!reader

cw: jiung's a perv 🙄 , phone sex , mutual masturbation , reader has a pretty dildo LMAO , slight voyeurism , mentioned somno , begging , a little crack at the end , nudes lolz

wc: 1.5k

a/n: support p1h's cb this month 🤭

jiung leans back into his chair, taking a deep sigh.

this was the third day in a row he has been in his room at fnc, working terribly hard on this new album, much to his partner's dismay.

[name] didn't mind his job. in fact, they loved seeing him performing on stage. but, the hardest part about dating an idol - besides having to keep your relationship a secret - was the promotional periods.

the periods were jiung would come home in the middle of the night, that is if he came home at all.

the periods were the only time they'd see him is on tv or over the phone.

the periods were they desperately missed him, physically, emotionally, and sometimes (most times) sexually.

god how much they missed being able to fuck him awake, fuck him after dance practices when he'd be dripping sweat, suck him off in the car while on the way home, and especially they missed the way his voice would tremble and crack as their hands roam all over him.

fuck, now they're aroused.

jiung decided his mini break was over and turned his attention back to his monitor but the audio files began to mush his brain again, making him groan and toss his glasses on the table.

he reached out for his phone and dialed his lover's number, spinning in his chair as he waited for them to answer.

their custom ringtone for jiung surprised them, not wanting to answer at first since their hand was down their pants, searching for some sort of relief.

"hello?", they whispered

"baby!", he exclaimed, "how are you?"

they felt a little better hearing his voice but it only made them painfully more excited.

"im okay...", they touched themselves to jiung's soft voice, "just really missing you"

he sighs, looking down at his lap, "i know, and im sorry i can't be there with you, cuddling you. i wanna hold you so bad"

they whimpered as they stroked a sensitive spot but masked it with a hum of acknowledgment.

"come home soon, okay?"

"i'll try...", jiung pouted, feeling bad for leaving his partner all alone, "whatcha been up to?"

they didn't reply, touching themselves more and trying not to make any sounds.

"baby? you there?"

"huh?! oh... uhm... mmmfuck- y-yeah im here"

jiung's eyebrows stitched together in both concern and confusion. were they sick? bloated? tired? had a headache? is that why such a noise escaped from their lips?

he couldn't deny, the hushed moan did turn him on but what if they were sick? he couldn't get off to the thought of his lover not being okay.

"darling?", jiung started, "you never answered my question; what've you been up to?"

they let a small and hopefully quiet whimper, pushing a finger into their hole, "j-just been watching... hmm... net-flix and p-playing games"

and there it was again: that pleasant, lewd sound which made jiung sink more into his chair.

"oh yeah? what kind of games did you play?"

they started thrusting their fingers, "oh you know... m-mariokart 'n stuh- stuff", they moaned out

they closed their eyes and cursed to themself for being too loud.

and too loud they were. jiung's hand moved from the chair's arm to his thigh, but not daring to inch closer to his crotch.

"you alright?"

"mhm, just a little... like, tired, you know?"

he laughed out, "you're a terrible liar you know that?"

"you don't have to lie, i know what you were doing"

their throat dried up, "what are you-"

"stop"

and they did. damn their submissiveness.

he scoffed, "playing games, huh? more like playing with yourself"

"i'm sure you look so good fucking yourself"

the image of [name]'s beautiful scrunched up with bliss face made his cock twitch and harden.

the hand on his lap slid up, palming himself and sighing in pleasure.

"can you show me?"

"sh-show you what?", they ask shyly

"show me how you play with yourself while im away"

his tone was low, and sexy, irresistible and it was so easy to submit to him and his every desire.

jiung was a pervert, not that [name] really cared. they'll admit, at first it was awkward to hear him sniffing their neck and catching him trying to steal their underwear as if he was some prepubescent teen. but, once he explained his - what he'd called it - obsession for them, they were beginning to get used to it.

they set up their phone to get a good angle then went to their closet, pulling out a box of toys. opening it, they choose a glass dildo with a cute pink heart at the top and toss it onto the bed.

they close the box then hide it under the bed before turning on the camera, displaying their half naked body. they waited for jiung's camera to turn on and oh god, they were not ready for the sight they were faced with.

his navy blue beanie was covering his brown hair, a nude long sleeved shirt draped over his slim body, his eyes hooded with lust.

"my stunning angel", he sighed out, palming himself more as he scanned [name]'s body.

"can i see more of you baby? please?"

he was begging, like seriously begging. this was an once-a-month type thing and since he already begged them to sit on his face last week, they weren't expecting this.

"awh, you miss me that much?", they teased.

his cock hardened and he whined, "yes yes, now... please?"

[name] grabbed the hem of their shirt, pulling it off their body as slow as they possibly could which only made jiung more impatient.

he lifts up his hips, sliding his sweatpants and boxers down, his angry-red cock springing out. his eyes stayed glued onto his phone as their "angel" began giving him a show, swaying their hips back and forth and touching themself all over.

jiung's fist gently wrapped around his cock and hissed as he squeezed the tip to leak more precum.

but then, they started.

the pretty glass dildo fit perfectly in their mouth, sticking their tongue out while attempting to rut against the bed. moans were muffled by the dildo instead of jiung's cock, making him frown in jealousy.

spreading their legs more, they rolled their hips into the mattress, a little wet spot forming. their boyfriend's hand slid up and down his length slow, fucking his hand at the same pace of [name] fucking their own mouth.

their spit was dripping from the dildo, taking it out of their mouth before pumping it with their hand and sliding it down the center of their chest.

jiung threw his head back and moaned as he stroked himself more, sinking down into his chair.

"why am i the only one naked? seems like this is only fun for you", they put the toy behind their back, shaking their head in disapproval, "you don't see shit until you come home"

he pouted and whined, not hesitating to lift his shirt and show off his soft tummy, "is this better darling?"

they pulled the toy out again, spitting on it, "much better"

they positioned themself so jiung could perfectly see how the dildo stretched them and their beautiful face as they sat down on it.

[name] bouncing on a toy he bought for them made his head fuzzy. he imagined his hand was their velvety walls, gliding up and down easily and skillfully while occasionally and unintentionally squeezing around him.

he didn't wanna come yet. no, in fact, he wanted to see them unravel on a single dildo that wasn't even half his size.

their hand went up to their nipple, squeezing and tugging at it while whining jiung's name.

the two continued like that: [name] fucking themself while moaning jiung's name loudly and jiung fisting himself with his shirt between his teeth to muffle his own moans.

soon, they were close, their moans increasing in volume.

"jiungjiungjiungfuck! ... sogoodsogoodiloveit! fuckfuck, i love you jiu- fuck!"

and the knot untied. their legs were shaking, breathing heavily, cum covering their camera with jiung's name being chanted.

he was close too, seeing his angel turn into the complete opposite turned him on immensely.

he pumped his cock faster, the shirt between his teeth falling down as he gasps, sighs, and curses under his breath.

"shit- you're so fuckin' pretty... all the fuckin' time", he squeezed the base of his cock, his face contorting in pleasure, "wanna cum for my angel, wanna make a mess for you"

he was right there, but before he could finish, the door swung open.

"jiun- OHMYGODWHATTHEFUCK"

[name] knew that voice from anywhere.

keeho.

they closed their eyes and fell face down into the sheets in embarrassment.

"NO WAY! IS THAT [NAME]?! HOLY SHIT YALL ARE A COUPLE OF-"

before they could hear the end of that sentence, jiung hung up. they started giggling, predicting what their friend had said.

they took their phone and quickly snapped a photo of the dildo pushed deeply inside of them, sending it to their boyfriend with the caption "wish this were you huh?"

[name] knew jiung would come home and make them eat their own words but that was something they were looking forward to.

#Spotify #p1harmony smut #p1harmony jiung #jiung smut #choi jiung

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unluckyhoneybee · 2 years

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See you on the streets. (Daniel Ricciardo)

Someone like him shouldn't be there, but he loves watching Rose race. Smut.

Note: Requested. After all the confusion with the request and all the suggestions and help from very nice people, I did my research job and put some imagination on it. The race system will be explained on the fic.

Street Racer Au

Main character is OC: Rose "Ro" Hammond.

Warning: Illegal stuff (illegal race + other stuff being named); +18: Fingering; oral (for both); penetrative sex (p in v); kind of public; unprotected sex.

"Are you nervous?" I heard Jimmy said.

"When have I been nervous?"

"Well, you have a passenger today"

I chuckled.

"And?"

"I don't know, I was just curious"

"I'm not nervous." I said leaning on the car. Jimmy was working on it. "How is the clutch?"

"Perfect. I changed it"

"Nice. I don't want to lose again"

"You won't. You are Ro Hammond"

"I did last week."

"You better win this week. You have a million dollar passenger today." Stuart, the race director said walking closer.

"That's what they paid?"

"A bit less. But he paid a lot."

I bit my lip. Everyone knew about him, about the money he had paid and his request to ride with one of us, with the leader. But no one knew who he was. It turned out that I was the leader, so... Yeah. The guy would ride with me.

The championship was secret. One of those secrets everyone knows about but nobody dare to even name. Only a few lucky people was able to attend to the races, people with money, people with talent, car owners, racers... Some of the worst pricks in the world were here each three weeks. The system was easy. The last one to finish the race, would be eliminated. Out of the championship. 20 races for 20 cars where only 1 could finish. Only if you were talented enough, or stupid enough, they'd let you race. You could race freely if you had a car, or race under someone else's orders if they had a car. The races happened in cities or roads. It didn't matter. The cars were different each one had their own particular things. If the organization wanted to make the race on a dirt road and your car wasn't ready for it, good luck next time, then. They always happened at 3 am. O' clock. If you were late, good luck next time. There were no regulations for the cars. The only rule was no not kill anyone. It was too fucked up already to deal with dead people. Street circuits were the most common. The thrill was bigger. Tokyo, Sydney, NY, LA, Barcelona,... Even Amsterdam. The organization had a good bunch or brilliant minds working on it. They always managed to get the correct people to collaborate. Somehow there was no police on race nights, they never left the station. By now, in the middle of the championship, there were 10 cars left.

I was excited for today. Las Vegas. The city that never sleeps. Big casinos, people, lights, glamour, luxury... It was Las Vegas and I was hungry for a win. I had only lost one race. The past race. Bad luck with the gearbox. An old clutch. And bam. I lost it. Having won already 8 races had given me money. Bets on me, "sponsors", random people who owed favors. I was lucky enough to have money for the new pieces. And here I was, ready again. Ready and hungry.

People's voices became louder. There was music and the roar of the engines could be heard. We were outside the city, we would start there, at the doors of Las Vegas.

"Don't kill the man. He had been around recently"

I nodded and turned my back to him. The bosses were rich men. Rich men with lots money but not enough morals. They had no fear. They had no mercy. A bad word to the wrong person and you'd simply disappear.

Soon they called the drivers to the line. I would start seventh. Your position on the last race would say we're you'd start. I drove there, Jimmy talking next to me and explaining Las Vegas and it's streets. We didn't know the track before the race. It was all a surprise. More adrenaline.

"Have you heard anything else about the passenger?" I asked when I stopped the engine.

"No. He is wealthy. He has a lot of money. And he is man. A fan of yours, people say."

I looked at him.

"There are not fans in here"

"He is not from here"

I frowned.

From here meant from this world. From the street races.

"No?"

Jimmy shook his head and got out of the car. I followed him. Soon I saw Stuart. He was walking on my direction, a tall man following him. As he got closer, Jimmy turned his face to me and gasped.

Daniel Ricciardo. F1 driver, Daniel Ricciardo. Daniel fucking Ricciardo.

"Ro Hammond..." Stuart started "Our little money machine... Let me introduce you to your passenger today"

I nodded. To be fair, I was nervous.

"I know him" I had seen him around sometimes, half hidden and in the VIP areas. He was famous, he was an important man, nobody could know he was here but at the same time everybody did. "Weird to see you down here"

He chuckled.

"Yeah. I wanted to feel it on my skin"

"Treat him well, Lady. He paid too much to drive with you." Stuart said touching my hair. I moved back. "And win. Daniel has big hopes on you"

I simply nodded, shooting a look to Daniel. He was so fucking handsome. That nose, that clothes, that aura he had... He was surely my type

"Ro" I said reaching my hand to him.

"Daniel" He said shaking it.

"Get into the car, we are starting soon"

Starting seventh wasn't ideal. It really wasn't. And to have a passenger on one of my most important races wasn't what I would have asked for.

Stuart left and Jimmy looked at me.

"Take care. And treat that new clutch well." He shook my shoulders. "Remember what we talked about. Las Vegas is straights. But I hardly doubt they will use them."

I nodded.

"It's 90° turns."

I smiled.

"My favorites"

We bumped our fists and I got in the car. I was ready for this. Daniel Ricciardo opened the door and whistled before sitting on the passenger seat. He looked around and then reached to the belt.

"The car is pretty."

"It is"

I looked at him. He was handsome as hell, even more than on TV. He had his hands on his thighs. The shirt he was wearing was half open, showing some chains hanging from his strong neck. And fuck, that smile...

Focus, Rose...

The lights lit and the engines started roaring.

"No speaking while I'm driving. And everything you hear while you are here... You didn't. Okay?"

He nodded. He looked nervous. Ricciardo, former Red Bull driver, the Honey Badger... It made me chuckle.

"First illegal race?" I asked half joking.

"On the car? Yep" He chuckled "I'm excited"

I made the engine roar.

"It'll be fun"

"I'm sure." Daniel shot me a cheeky smile. I couldn't believe I had someone like him on my car. "It sounds so good"

The lights went out and I pressed the gas. My car had power, it was a strong machine and Jimmy worked hard on it. I had passed two cars as soon as we started.

"Fuck..." Daniel gasped.

I moved to the right and passed another one.

"Oh shit"

He was grabbing everywhere. For being a race driver, he seemed pretty stressed to be in a car.

I saw one of those signs. You had to pay attention or you would missed them, luckily I was fast enough to identify the direction. Pressing the clutch and changing the gear, I took a turn to the right, barely missing the car that was next to me.

"F-fuck"

We were now in Las Vegas. In the city. Main Street. The casinos lit the sky at the end.

"Jefferson has taken Doodie out" I heard Jimmy on the radio. I took it and pressed the button.

"What?"

"Doodie is currently inside a TV store. Jefferson pushed him"

"Fucking prick. Do you know where he is?"

"Third. He pushed when he was being overtaken"

Suddenly another sign appeared. Again, clutch, gear and turn.

Once the car was straight again, I pressed the button but Daniel took the little machine away.

"No fucking talking and driving" He groaned. "Hey Jimmy. It's Dan. I will talk to you tonight."

"Sorry mate, our car is not as modern as yours" I said.

He simply laughed. The man was still grabbing into the door for dear life. But then I tried to overtake the car in front of me and he tensed.

Overtaking here was so much difficult than what he did. Cars were aggressive, they pushed to the limit, and if they pushed you out of the track here they pushed you into a building.

The car in front of me started dancing and moving in S. And suddenly...

"The police. The fucking police. Get out. They are in the Bellagio. You are going in that way." I heard Jimmy. My heart jumped on my chest. "Get out, Ro. Get the fuck out. They can't catch you with Daniel Ricciardo in the car"

"Fuck!" I hitted the steering wheel and looked at the mirrors. Then at Daniel. He was looking at me and he was scared. He was a famous driver and I understood what would mean for him to be seen in a race like this. "Okay, change of plans"

I looked to the right to turn and in the next street, but somehow Jefferson was there.

"Shit"

He tried to hit me and suddenly I had a hand on my thigh.

"Fuck!" I groaned.

"Hey, Ro. I have to leave. Go to the desert. See you tomorrow, okay?" I heard on the radio. I was to worried about Jefferson, but it made me gulp.

"Daniel, please"

"Yeah"

I heard the button of the radio.

"Take care, Jimmy. See you"

"I want you alive. Bye"

"Fucking shit" Daniel whispered.

"Okay, Daniel. Things will get dirty. I'm sorry for this"

"Just drive, don't worry about me"

I looked at Jefferson's car and pressed the brakes enough for him to pass me. Then I moved my car to his left and press the gas. I would take the next street and drive around the Bellagio on the other side to avoid police. Then, using the handbrake, I made the car slightly spin and turn to the left.

"Wow!" Daniel shouted making me chuckle.

I was out of the track now, driving way to fast for a city.

"That was fucking awesome. That Jefferson can suck my balls"

I laughed and look at him.

"You look impressed." I smiled.

"Because that was impressive, baby" He said.

Suddenly, I remembered his hand on my leg and and my skin burnt.

"I fucking knew I had to bet on you"

I rolled my eyes.

"Let me tell you that the race is over and you probably lost it"

"It wasn't that much. I have wine bottles more expensive"

"Oh wow"

I looked at him for a second. A too long second. A police car appeared out of nowhere.

It happened fast, we almost crush but somehow I managed to avoid it. We went from more than 120 km/h to stop in the middle of the street right in front of them.

"Reverse, reverse!"

"I know!"

I put the car on reverse and press the pedal. The police start moving towards us, but I pulled the handbrake and the car turn. Then I changed the gear again and drove to another street.

"We will distract them"

"I trust you. But be careful"

I chuckled.

"It's not my first time, Ricciardo"

"You are hot" He smiled.

"Well, thank you"

I took two turns to the right and one to the left and he looked through the mirrors.

"Yeah, you are so hot. We have lost them. That's talent, girl"

It didn't took us long to leave the city. I went to some secondary road, avoiding places where the police could be and driving at a normal speed to not call unnecessary attention.

"Fucking shit. That was awful." I whispered.

"Your friend..." He sounded a bit scared.

"Jimmy? I just hope he is okay" I said grabbing the steering wheel hard. "He probably had time to leave."

"What did he meant with that thing about not being catched with me in the car?"

I sighed.

"You are rich, we are not. I don't know. You can pay a better lawyer I will just die on jail or something"

"Nah, we are like Thelma and Louis now" He tapped my thigh and finally retreated his hand.

I laughed.

"I'm going to the desert. We will wait for a bit and then come back to Las Vegas. I can't just drive around there with a car like this."

"Nice, yeah. I have nothing better to do."

"Run from the police after an illegal race sounds like a good plan" I laughed.

"It is" He chuckled. "You are an amazing driver, by the way"

"Thank you. I'm honored"

We drove past a big truck and Daniel looked at it. I took the opportunity to look at him. He had a thin layer of sweat on his forehead and his curls were messy.

"What are you doing here, Daniel? Why risk a career like yours in this way?"

He took a deep breath and his head fell against the seat. He had rolled the window down and the wind was moving his curls.

"When you have lots of money you do stupid shit, Ro"

"I see"

"I saw you in Sidney" He said not long after.

"I won in Sidney"

"I know. You were amazing. They had nothing to do against you"

I laughed.

"You see me with good eyes"

"No, it's true. You were out of this car before the others had crossed the line. I was there."

"And how did you got in there? Who told you?"

"Don't tell anyone" He pointed a finger to me.

"I won't."

"Jenson Button"

I crocked an eyebrow.

"Button? Jenson Button really told you about this?"

"Yeah. He was like: hey, I know this place. And he fucking took me to this illegal race where this amazing woman was leading in the most fucking awesome car ever"

I blushed. I fucking blushed.

"And I got hooked" His hand returned to my leg and his fingers grazed the inside of my thigh.

I bit my lip.

"And how did you got in this mess, Rose Hammond?"

"Money. I needed money. I was good with cars. I knew Jimmy who is an amazing mechanic. I am a professional driver too. You can call it that way. I work for rich people. I saw this man's garage. Fucking awesome, Daniel. It wasn't easy, but I stole this beauty."

"Stole? This thing is stolen?"

"I drive illegal races for money. I can't pay a car like this. Steal a car was the easy way"

"You don't have a boss?"

I shook my head. I was alone. I didn't drive for anyone. It was just me and Jimmy.

"Fuck..." His fingers moved down to my knee and swallowed hard. "I thought someone paid for you to drive"

"No."

"Then?"

"Well, I think you will like this part" I giggled. "I told them I had money. I told them I could pay for a place in a race. I didn't even had a car yet. Those stupid men looked at me and laughed at my face. So I got angry. I called Jimmy and told him. Then we planned it. It was perfect. Nobody noticed when I took the car out of the garage. The next day it was gone and no one had seen anything. Not even me. I told them. I went to the boss like... The car is gone. And they believed me. Meanwhile, Jimmy was working on it. He transformed it. He did everything to change the appearance and gave him the strongest engine he could find. Next week, I went back and offered them the money I didn't have. I showed them the car and they believed me. They let me race, I won and payed my place. It was funny to convince them" I sighed proudly "I fucking won my place on the races"

He was looking at me and it was so fucking intense.

"Rose, you should stop the car"

I bit my lip. "Why?"

"Because I need to fucking kiss you"

And as soon as I could, I stopped the car on one side of the road hidden behind some bushes.

I hadn't even stopped the engine when he cupped my face and crashed his lips on mine. He was fierce and desperate, devouring my mouth with such a passion that our teeth clashed once or twice. He was hungry and when he pulled back we were both panting. "Get out of the car"

I obeyed fast, turning the car off and leaving it. We met in front of it. Daniel cupped my face and dive in. He kissed me slow now, his lips bruising mine and taking my breath away. I ran my hands through his curls and slid my tongue on his mouth.

This is not what I was expecting for today, but fuck... It was even better.

His fingers ran down my face to my neck and chest, avoiding to touch my breast and digging into my waist. He pushed me until I was between the car and him. And then he pushed you up and sat you on the hood.

Daniel looked at you.

"I was dying to kiss you... I haven't stopped thinking about you since I saw you winning in Sidney" He bit your lower lip and pressed you close to him. "Now I'm going to fuck you over you car, okay?"

I nodded. I was panting, blushing and probably already wet.

"Has someone ever done it? Has someone ever fucked you on this pretty car?"

"No"

"No?"

Daniel ran his lips down my throat, lapping on my skin and biting softly on my pulse point. I whimpered.

"Do you want me to?"

"Yes, Daniel"

"Yeah?"

I nodded again. He ran his nose up my neck and cheek again before leaving a kiss in there.

"Yeah. I want you to fuck me here"

He smiled and I felt it on my skin. Then bit down on my neck and I moaned.

"Those pretty sounds... I can't wait to hear more of it"

His lips came back to mine and I moaned on his mouth. Every touch of him felt good. Every single one. His fingers traced shapes on my sides and laid me down on the hood. I gasped when he press his body against mine. He was hard on his trousers.

"Can you feel it?" He kissed my chin and then my neck. "Can you feel what you do to me? I have been like this since that fucking race started" His hips rutted into mine and I let a little moan.

Daniel lifted my t-shirt to my armpits and then moved the bralette aside. Without a word, he put one of my nipples on his mouth and I whimpered.

"Danny..."

I felt his smile before he gently bit. "O-oh shit" Then he sucked again and I let my head fall against the car. Would it be that bad to let this stranger do whatever he wanted?

He started traveling with his kissed down my belly at the same time he pushed my trousers down.

"I kept coming only for you" He whispered between kisses. "I have been here on each race since Sidney" He bit the flesh under my bellybutton and I whimpered. "Only because I needed to see you"

His fingers hooked on my underwear and he pulled down. The fresh air of the desert night hit my core and I shivered. But soon it was replaced by his wet and warm tongue. "Oh fuck"

He gave me soft tentative licks and pushed my legs up and closer to my chest. He dive in like an starved man. His plump lips were talented and his tongue worked wonders on my clit. I simply let myself fall on the pleasure. We were in the middle of the desert in Nevada. The stars were clear above me and I had Daniel Ricciardo fucking eating me out in the most amazing way.

I took my hands to his hair and gently pulled. I earned a low moan that vibrated through my core and made me see the stars for a second.

Daniel decided to use his fingers then. Those long fingers that had felt so good on my thigh minutes before. And oh fuck, he was good with them. I closed my eyes and pressed him further into me, my hips moving on their own and riding his face. He simply let me do it. No grabbing my hips and stopping my movements, no keeping me still. He left me on my own doing whatever I wanted with him. So I did. I rode his face and fingers until my orgasm approached.

"Oh shit, Daniel... Shit... Aaagh" I bit my lip and closed eyes. He was good, so good. "I'm gonna cum"

He moved his fingers faster and sucked my clit as his life depended on it. And I came. It was intense, hard and I saw white. Y was completely splayed over the hood of my car and I had no energy to move. I couldn't stop smiling as he lap the the juices off me, humming and enjoying it.

Then Daniel pulled back and grabbed my face. I didn't had time to do anything. He had kissed me with passion, his tongue dancing with mine and letting me taste myself on his mouth. He pulled me closer to his body till our chest were flat together. I hugged his shoulders and grabbed into his back.

His kisses were consuming. He stole my breath with each one of them.

"F-fuck me..." I managed to say between kisses.

"Do you really want it?" He said cupping my chin and making me look into his eyes.

His pupils were wide and his skin had a pink shade. There was a thin layer of sweat on his forehead and neck and he had never looked more kissable.

"Yes, Danny."

Daniel kissed me again, more deep and slow. He laid me back on the hood and pressed his hand on my chest. His fingers traveled to my neck and gently pressed around it. I gasped and he bit my lip.

"You don't know how much I wanted to have you like this" He bit the side of my breast and I let a strangled moan out. "It has been months... I couldn't stop thinking of you..." Then he bit the flesh of my stomach and I gasped. "I want you so bad..."

A truck passed by on the road but the loud noise of the honk didn't disturb us I was too lost on the feeling of his teeth on my skin and his hand on my neck.

But then both disappeared and I opened my eyes. His t-shirt fell next to me and I smiled. He was a beautiful man. Only for me, even if it was just a night.

"Tell me you want me too" He said opening his belt. His black tight trousers did nothing to hide the bulge inside of them.

"I want you, Daniel." I was desperate to have him. "I want you so bad"

He smiled and pulled his trousers down. I bit my lip and looked at him. I could see the shape of a thigh tattoo peaking. He has insanely hot.

"Open those legs wide for me, I'm gonna make you feel good, baby"

I obeyed.

"Good girl"

He slowly dragged the tip of his member up and down my core and I whimpered. It was enough for him, he pushed inside and I moaned his name.

"Oh, baby... Fuck... I knew you would feel good, but not this good." His hand came back to my neck and the other found a place on my hip. "Look at me while I fuck you, okay?"

I nodded and bit my lip, unable to speak as he started moving. Slow and deep trusts. Shit. I could feel him everywhere.

"Oh baby, you are wonderful..." He groaned. He increased the pace and I gasped. He was so deep...

Daniel slip two fingers on my open mouth.

"Wet this fingers for me, baby"

I grabbed his wrist and sucked his fingers, running my tongue over them and giving him a hint of what I could do with my mouth. I earned a few harder thrusts that made me squeeze my eyes for a second. He pulled his fingers back and gave me a sloppy kiss. Then he put his fingers on my. Lit and started playing with it.

I was done then. The pleasure was inmense. Daniel was beautiful, the sky was beautiful, the adrenaline was still kicking on my veins, the fresh air was leaving goosebumps on my skin... He was deep, fucking me hard and touching me just as fast. I couldn't even think straight. Just moan and whimper. No words came out of my mouth, only pleasure sounds and his name. And he was looking at me like that, like if I was the only woman in the world.

"I know baby, I know" He said looking into my eyes. "Are you gonna cum for me again? I can feel you clenching. You are driving me insane."

I whimpered and tried to grab into him, but only managed to run my nails over his hard abs.

He groaned.

"C'mon baby, cum for me? Eh?"

I nodded fast.

"Fuck... Yes. Cum for me, baby"

I only needed his fingers around my throat again to cum hard, harder than before. So hard that I saw stars behind my closed eyes and for a moment forgot about everything else as he kept fucking me.

"So good, you are so good" I heard him saying, but he sounded so far. "I'm gonna cum soon, Ro..."

I regained my senses a bit, opening my eyes and trying to speak.

"Cum in my mouth..."

"What?"

"L-let me..."

He pulled back and I whimpered at his lost. "Sure?"

I nodded. He was fast dropping his shirt on the floor. I felt shaky and weak when he helped me to get off the car. But soon I dropped on my knees and looked at him, so desperate to cum and feel me, looking like a fucking God and just waiting for me to do something.

With my hand on his balls, I put his cock on my mouth and ran my tongue over it, tasting him and myself on it. He groaned and threaded his hand on my hair.

"So fucking pretty with my cock in your mouth"

I moaned and took him deeper. He cursed under his breath and pushed a bit. I closed my eyes and started bobbing my head, showing him everything I knew. I was delighted by the most beautiful noises and tender touched on my face as I let him fuck my mouth.

"Fuck yes... You are hot, so hot." He noted.

Only a few seconds later, he tensed and groaned.

"R-rose..." He came on my mouth, keeping me still as he rode his orgasm.

When he pulled back, he was smiling, cupping my face with his hands and breathing hard. I smiled and swallowed, then showed him my tongue.

"Fucking shit, Ro..." He kissed me hard, almost knocking me to the ground as he devoured my mouth.

When we pulled back, we were panting. The look on his eyes was intense. I felt like jelly, both because of the previous orgasms and the way he was treating me.

"You are the prettiest thing I have ever seen, Rose Hammond"

I smiled and blushed hard, but I was unable to speak.

He gently grabbed me and helped me standing. Then, he also helped fixing my clothes, slowly massaging my legs on his way.

What I wasn't expecting was him putting me back on the hood and snaking his arms around my waist. I put mine around his neck and he pressed his forehead on mine.

"Thank you for this night, Rose."

"The race was fucked up" I answered with a little smile.

"You know what I mean. It was amazing. Everything."

"You are invited, whenever you want. I just hope you are not a bad luck charm or something"

He chuckled and cupped my check. Then kissed me. We spent so much time like that, lazily making out on my car, in the middle of nowhere and high on feelings. Just us in there.

When he pulled back and hid his nose on my neck, the sun was already peaking behind a mountain. I felt tired and sleepy, but incredibly happy.

It was the radio what pulled us out of our little bubble. The window were down, so I could hear perfectly.

"Ro? Ro, are you okay?"

Daniel pulled back and I jumped from the car, my knees almost giving up. Daniel laughed and I showed him my middle finger.

"Hey Jimmy" I said grabbing the radio through the window

"Oh shit, you are free. They got Jefferson"

I saw Daniel throwing a fist on the air and I laughed.

"Fuck him"

"Are you OK?"

Daniel came behind me and pressed himself against me, leaving a couple of kisses on my neck.

"Perfect. You?"

"Yeah, I'm safe. See you on the usual place?"

"Yeah. Call a cab for Ricciardo"

He bit my neck and I smiled. Fuck, I would give everything I had only for this night to last longer.

"Okay. See you"

"See you"

"I hope you let me drive this beauty now" He said touching the car.

"You have too, I'm exhausted."

He chuckled and turned me around. Then kissed me again and again and again.

When we were driving back to Las Vegas, he kept my hand on the gear stick with his. No one had driven this car since it was mine. Only him. And I would let him do it whenever he wanted.

When he stopped the car where I told him, he gave me a look and then touched my nose.

"Take care, Rose Hammond."

I smiled and grabbed his hand. I kissed his knuckles and the number 3.

"I will. I promise but..."

"But..."

"I want to see you again. On the next race. I want you there cheering for me"

He chuckled.

"Just tell me where and when and I'll be there."

I smiled.

Jimmy's van stopped in front of us.

"I will need your number for that"

He took my phone from its place and wrote it. Lucky charm.

I giggled.

We heard Jimmy saying hi slightly confused.

When we came out of the car, he looked at me.

"Why was he driving?"

"Because he is Daniel Ricciardo, Jimmy"

I hugged my friend, happy to see him free and alive.

He gave me a weird look but went and hugged Daniel.

The driver looked at me half laughing.

"I'm a fan, mate. A huge fan. It's a pleasure"

Daniel laughed and gave Jimmy a pat on the shoulder.

"I will take a Pic with you next time"

"Next time?" Poor Jimmy was so confused.

"Ro invited me" He winked at me and I smile.

Oh, fuck. This man.

A cab appeared a few meters away.

"Right. I should leave. It has been a pleasure, Ro."

I chuckled.

"Yes it has" I went to shake his hand, but the fucker pulled and crashed out mouths.

I could hear Jimmy's gasp as I dive in the kiss, letting go and enjoying on last time.

"See you on the streets, Danny" I said giving him a last peck on those beautiful lips.

"See you on the streets, Rose"

Jimmy and I watched him walk away.

"Care to explain?"

"What do you want to know?"

"Huh, everything?"

"Yeah, well. Jefferson tried to hit me, then the police almost catch us, we run away to the desert. Like fucking Thelma & Louise"

"And..."

"He fucked me like a God itself"

"Oh shit"

"Yeah, oh shit"

Here it is. I hope it was worth the wait. I fucking love it.

#daniel ricciardo #Dr #Smut #F1 #Fic

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whump-me-all-night-long · 2 years

Text

Whumptober Day 10

No. 10 Poor Unfortunate Souls

Taser | Whipping | Waterboarding

CW: civilian whumpee, intimate whumper, waterboarding, interrogation, references to being locked in a trunk

The civilian must've passed out at some point while locked in the trunk, because when they next rose to consciousness, it was through the help of ice-cold water dumped on top of them.

They gasped, spluttering and coughing, looking up with wild eyes. They were trapped in what looked like a custom made metal chair, with restraints around their ankles and wrists to keep them from moving.

The man who had kidnapped them stood in front of them, smirking and holding a bucket that water was still dripping out of.

“Rise and shine, little bird,” he said with a widening grin.

Chest still heaving, the civilian looked up at him with wide eyes. “What- what- why did y-you do that?”

The man shrugged, setting the bucket down on the concrete floor. “You were out cold there for a while. I got impatient.” Shifting on his feet slightly, the man continued, “Anyways, I thought it time we get to know each other a little better, little bird. Don't you agree?”

Immediately the civilian’s muscles tensed and they pushed themself as far back against the chair as they could. “What d-do you mean?” they asked, teeth clacking together as the cold water continued to drip down them.

“I mean,” the man emphasized, stepping closer to them and crouching slightly, “that I am going to ask you some questions and you are going to answer. And,” he chuckled darkly, “if you decide to do something as incredibly stupid as lie to me or refuse to answer, well, let's just say I'll give you some extra motivation not to.”

Before they could think it through, the civilian was already shaking their head. “P-please just let me, me go. Please, I-I haven't done anything.”

Their head snapped violently to the side a moment later, cheek throbbing where the man had backhanded them. “Wrong answer, little bird,” he chastised.

The civilian let their head fall down, closing their eyes in a useless attempt to block the tears from falling.

The next thing they knew, a hand was wrapping itself in their curls, wrenching their head upward. Their neck craned backwards, leaving them with no option but to stare helplessly up at their captor.

He stared coldly down at them. “I will ask you a question. You will answer. Understood?”

Tears sliding down their temples, the civilian could only whisper a small broken “please”.

The man shrugged before slinging a cloth over the bottom half of their face. Eyes widening in understanding, the civilian futilely tried to knock the cloth from their face, wildly swinging their neck.

However, the man towering above them had too strong of a grip for them, and, before they knew it, water was pouring down on them, causing their lungs to burn and their mouth to gape widely in a helpless attempt to draw in oxygen.

While it felt like it lasted an eternity, after only a few seconds, the man lifted the cloth from their face and surprisingly gently helped them to lean forward, rubbing their back as they coughed and gasped in large gulps of air.

If the civilian didn't know better, they'd say the hand petting their hair was comforting. After what felt like too short a time, the man was sitting them up straight.

“Little bird,” the man cooed, “I'm gonna start easy. First question, tell me your name.”

The civilian had to work their jaw for a few seconds before their voice worked again. “C-Carlen,” they rasped hopelessly.

“Mm, Carlen,” the man repeated, as if savoring the sound of their name on his tongue. “Good, little bird.”

And so it went. The man would waterboard them for a few moments then ask them a question. The civilian steadily grew more distraught, tears and snot smearing on their face as their lungs burned and ached.

After an indeterminate amount of time, the man knew basically everything there was to know about the civilian.

Their full name. Their address. Their family and friends. Their job. Habits. Hobbies. Spending habits and credit scores.

Eventually, the man let their head drop forward again, the civilian groaning at the sudden lack of tension in their neck.

The man’s hand returned to stroking their hair as they shuddered and cried quietly.

“Thank you, my little bird,” the man said softly. “You were very good for me, weren't you? I think we're going to have a lot of fun together, Carlen, you and I.”

---

Taglist: @badluck990 @thelazywitchphotographer @the-vagabond-nun @shywhumpauthor @panic-and-chaos @freefallingup13

#whumptober2022 #no. 10 #waterboarding #oc #fic #civilian whumpee #intimate whumper #interrogation #waterboarding cw #referenced kidnapping #references locked in a trunk

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rjalker · 10 months

Text

I randomly remembered Fanfiction.net exists and thought huh I should see if I've gotten any new reviws.

and zygz.

I did get a review.

For Interview With A Murderbot.

From 22 hours ago, aka, July 19th, 2023.

I will just fucking post the story here. It's 2,085 words long.

Would you like to see the review that 99bottlesofbeeronthewall left?

"I could so see Murderbot reacting this way to a panel interview. They'd find so many things to nitpick. :P"

Zyg.

I'm screaming.

Read the 2k word story. That was literally written in reaction to this fandom's exorsexism. And then read that review again. And scream with me.

“Well, don't you think you'd be more comfortable using other pronouns? I mean, 'it' is used for things in this language, not people.”

This was coming from a human from Preservation, who'd been born here and raised here, so you could see why Murderbot had been so skeptical/resigned about Preservation's Super Totally Awesome For Real so-called “Equality between Bots and Actual People™”.

The human in question was sitting in the front row of chairs in front of the stage, wearing a multi-piece outfit of grey, orange, and white, with long pant legs but sleeves that cut off at the elbow, a very wide belt, large, red-tinted glasses, and a wide-brimmed silver hat.

Why, exactly, had Murderbot agreed to put up with this shit, again? Oh, right, to fight for that so-called equality that apparently already existed, that totally didn't need to be fought for, or anything, because things were as good as they needed to get, bots already had equal rights (no they literally didn't), they didn't need any more, and constructs certainly didn't need any rights. Totally. For sure.

Murderbot had to put up with this shit now, so other people who came after it wouldn't have to. It was for the greater good of all society, and totally admirable and awesome and selfless and blah blah blah.

What it was was obnoxious and infuriating and exhausting, but at least it was getting paid for it.

Oh wait, just kidding, no it wasn't! Mensah hadn't been able to convince anyone in the stupid government she was no longer a part of that this Q&A session was a real job/public service they were performing, that everyone involved should be fairly compensated for.

More than half the people in charge of the government still didn't even want it here, there was no way they were going to fund the public outreach programs designed to get more people to welcome constructs to their stupid planet.

The fact that it had to do this for free was just adding insult to injury.

It was one thing to talk to Dr. Bharadwaj in the privacy of her office. Murderbot liked her. She was smart, she was funny, and it didn't have to explain every single detail of something for her to get it, and she didn't ask it absurdly stupid questions or try to demean it.

It was another thing entirely to be sitting in front of humans on camera letting them ask stupid questions and having to put up with their bullshit when they refused to accept its answer.

Thankfully, Murderbot had its drones, so it didn't have to worry about meeting this idiot human's eyes as it said flatly, its voice carrying throughout the room thanks to the sound amplifier clipped to its ear and down to its jaw, “I thought bots here on Preservation /were/ considered people.” For now it was going to ignore the main part of the question, because this was just too annoying to ignore.

Just to be petty, it tapped 9JX on the feed a moment ahead of time to give it warning, then added outloud, “Hey, 9JX, aren't you a people?”

(Humans, it had learned after doing one of these interview panels with 3.14, a bot possibly even more determined to be obnoxious to humans than Murderbot, fucking hated it when you said 'a people' instead of 'a person', so, following 3.14's example, Murderbot made sure to purposefully say it this way whenever it could, just to piss the annoying humans off.)

9JX its current 'team mate' for this panel, being the representative for the cargo haulers. It had been sitting over on the other end of the stage, waiting patiently for questions aimed at it, that didn't seem to be coming. All the questions up until now except one - - (did you get to pick your own paint color? Yes) - - had been for Murderbot alone.

9JX was built to lift and transport large containers outside the actual dock, so it was smaller than most of the cargo hauler types Murderbot had seen in various ports, but it was still bigger than a human or a construct, and designed with functionality in mind, not aesthetics or appealing to human sensibilities.

Unlike constructs like Murderbot or other humanoid bots, it didn't have any eyes, or anything remotely resembling a human face. It looked more like a vehicle than a person, and for a lot of humans, that was enough in their minds to qualify it solidly as an object, instead of a person. Even though they were the one's who'd given it intelligence in the first place. Because humans were fucking stupid.

(Like, it's not like you can /accidentally/ invent artificial intelligence. It requires a lot of technical skills and expensive materials and blueprints and all this complicated shit that it just wasn't possible to do /by accident/. It wasn't a twelve step process. It was a five thousand step process at minimum. No human had ever sat around and just /accidentally/ built an artificial intelligence.)

Anyways.

9JX had decided to have speakers installed specifically so it could talk to humans without being connected to the feed, since it thought it was distracting. (Which sounded unbelievable to Murderbot. How was it possible to function without constant access to the feed? 9JX had the opposite question for it - - how can you function with all those distractions racing around at all times?)

9JX said in the voice synthesized for it specially from multiple donated human recordings, “Yes, I am a people. That's why I'm sitting here, after all.” (Yes, almost all the robots were in on the running gag. Turns out they were actually funny when you were part of the joke. Especially when the joke made obnoxious humans mad.)

“And aren't your pronouns it/its?” Murderbot asked.

“Yep. They're fun, and I picked them out all by myself.” It was true - - 9JX had been assigned he/him pronouns upon construction, and had used those pronouns for the first thirty years of its life, until it decided to change them. It continued, “I guess you could say I'm something of a trendsetter.”

Also true, considering 9JX was one of the oldest bots on Preservation that was still functioning. It had been part of the original doomed colony, and had been packed into the rescue ship just like everyone else. It was starting to wear down in its old age, but the humans and other bots did everything they could to keep it in good repair.

The good part of that story was that it had convinced humans to let bots change their pronouns. The bad part was that humans had started deciding that 9JX using it/its pronouns meant all bots should use it/its pronouns. Even though some of them didn't want to, like Nehir, or Delta, or 4528B-I, or other bots whose names Murderbot hadn't bothered to save to its long-term storage.

Lots of bots on Preservation had pronouns other than it/its, but most of the humans refused to use those pronouns for them, instead just pretending that all robots had the same gender (aka no gender), so therefore all bots should all use and be happy with the same pronouns.

That wasn't how this worked, at all.

Murderbot liked to think of its gender as indeterminate, or not applicable. That had to do with multiple things, including its asexuality, aromanticism, and aplatonicism. It wasn't attracted to anyone, not bots, not humans, not other constructs, in any way, and didn't want anyone being attracted to it, either. That would just be gross. If someone held up a list of genders they were attracted to, in any way, Murderbot wanted to be excluded every single time.

But that wasn't how it worked for all robots, all constructs, or even all SecUnits. Murderbot couldn't even imagine being sexually or romantically or platonically attracted to someone, but that didn't mean other people were lying when they talked about their own experiences.

(Yes, Murderbot had been horrified and disgusted beyond words the first time it learned of a construct who felt sexual and romantic attraction to other people, including humans. Yes, it had made a total jackass out of itself by being a bigoted asshole to them about it, treating them like shit and ranting about how they were just doing this to appease humans and making humans think they could just have sex with any construct they wanted. Yes, it regretted every fraction of second of what it had said and wished it could wipe the incident from its memory. But it wasn't going to do that, no matter how ashamed it was, because it had been one of the most important learning experiences it had ever had in its existing memory.)

The human - - this time Murderbot did check the feed tag, and saw their name was Fiscal, their gender was Neutral, they used the honorific Vr./veyir, they were married to three partners, had as many kids, had a pet yellow-tailed phoron, and their pronouns were they/them/their/theirself (singular) - - was rolling their eyes and making an exasperated huffing noise.

“I wasn't talking to the hauler bot, I was talking to you.” They said scornfully, doing their best to stare directly at Murderbot's eyes in that obnoxiously intense way some humans just love to do for some reason.

Well, they was staring at Murderbot's opaque faceplate, but didn't realize Murderbot had its eyes closed, watching the scene only through its cameras from the drones it had scattered around the room.

Having your face hidden fucking rocked. Murderbot couldn't believe it had gone so long pretending it was fine with letting humans see its face all the time. Talk about a nightmare.

“And what makes me different from a hauler bot?” Murderbot asked, in the tone of voice it reserved for when humans were being fucking stupid and it wanted to let them know that without actually saying it. It was also using the trick it'd learned from ART - - make the person you were arguing with spell out their own stupid ideas for everyone to hear, and maybe they'd realize as they were verbalizing it just how stupid it was.

Fiscal, though, didn't seem to realize how stupid they was being, since they said, with no hint of irony or self awareness or embarrassment, “You look human, so it's different. You're more of a person, so it's not right to call you an it.”

So this idiot was literally admitting they didn't think bots were people. Murderbot hoped all the fancy government workers who'd refused to fund this little get together were crying over how much their supposed little utopia was failing on its most basic advertising principal.

“I'm a person whether I'm human or not, whether I use it/its pronouns or not.” Murderbot said, keeping its voice level through a mixture of resigned boredom and a supreme will of effort, “9JX is a person whether it looks human or not, and it wouldn't be more of a person if it started using other pronouns.”

Fiscal folded their arms across their chest, looking stubborn, like they was in the right, or something. “It's not right, I'm just not comfortable calling you an it, it's dehumanizing. You're a person, not a thing. Why don't you try they/them pronouns? I'm sure you'll find people will treat you better if you use them. Using it/its just gives people an excuse to treat you like a bot.”

Yeah, Murderbot hoped everyone on Preservation was enjoying this.

Through one of the drones it had assigned to Dr. Mensah, it could see her dropping her face into her hands at her desk. One of the government officials was sitting in the chair across from her, (Keane, the same nonbinary human Murderbot had met the last time Mensah tried to set up funding) vis mouth open in unabashed shock and horror at the dual-faced display screen on the desk in from of vem. Clearly, ve hadn't expected the public's perception of bots to be this far from the ideal they all prided themselves on.

The look of horror on vis face was almost worth the hassle of doing all of this for free.

And who knew, if this fucking bigot kept talking, maybe the government would be ashamed enough to pay them all in retrospect for subjecting themselves to the bigotry in the first place.

Well, a murderbot could hope.

#fandom exorsexism #jesus fucking christ #Murderbot #The Murderbot Diaries #TMBD fandom exorsexism #exorsexism #misgendering #ititsantagonism #it/ts antagonism #neopronomisia #Rjalker reads The Murderbot Diaries #when will fandom stop misgendering #transmisia #ititspronouns

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chyeyuj · 1 year

Text

Captain save a hoe

!¡Kris will be 18 in this¡!

Warnings! ; AFAB!reader, femdom, implied smut, fingering, overstimulating, pet names like ,,bunny, lapping.

Kris's POV

I sat in my office chair as I stared at the door. I've been thinking of Y/N lately. I recall of what happened yesterday...just thinking of it makes me blush. The way she looked at me will never fail to make my cheeks turn red. "Oh Y/N, how I need you right now." I clenched my thighs together and sighed. `what are these thoughts..` just as I was about to do it, the door swung open revealing Y/N herself. "O-oh Y/N! What brings you here?" I said, slightly blushing. "Oh nothing Kris, I just missed you this whole day." She cooed as she got closer to the table and sat on me, her back facing me. Her head slowly turning to face face me. The look on her eyes similar to yesterday's. "Say, Kris..are you still thinking about what happened yesterday?" Y/N asked. I coughed and look away, my cheeks feeling hot. "Ahem- uhm..I guess you could say that." I looked away, not wanting to look into her E/C eyes that I adore. Y/N chuckled at my reply as she got up from the table and went next to me, holding my chin up so that I could see her. Her eyes staring down at me. "Kris, I know how you feel right now. You know you can't hide it from me. You're being really obvious with you feelings." She turned me around and got on her knees, getting close to my womanhood. "Y/N— I..."

Y/N's POV

The look on Kris's face made me want to ruin her so badly. "C'mon Kris, you know you want this." Kris spread her legs open, revealing her wet core. "That's a good bunny." I placed on of her legs atop of my should. I ripped her underwear off and threw it somewhere across the room. I licked my fingers than began fingering her on a slow pace. Her whines and moans making me feral but I can't ruin her just yet. "You like that huh? I can't believe you're into this type of stuff." Her walls tightening up. I can't believe she's already close to cumming. She grabbed my wrist and moan out my name. "'m cumming!!" I sped up my pace a bit and let her come. "Good job on your first release bunny. Now, don't cum unless I say so alright?" She sigh then nodded. Let the fun begin.

(still ur pov)

It's been alot of rounds already and I'm very surprised that nobody came in. They'd usually go to Kris's office alot to talk about stuff but I guess not today. Kris's grip on my shoulder made me winced a bit. We're now in a scissoring position. "Y— Master, p-please let me c-cum I'll be a good girl I promise!!" "Hmmh..sure, but you gotta wait until I come alright? Don't worry bunny, it won't be long." I suck on her neck to leave a mark there and let everybody know that I claim her. "I'm close.." I groaned out, digging my nails deep into her thighs. "Ah— me too!" After a few more thrust, we both came. "T-that was exhausting.." we both panted. Then after that we wore our clothes. I looked at her ripped up panty on the floor and laughed. "I'm sorry about your panties." Kris let out a small ` hmph` and look away.

Lil bonus part?

"Y/N..what are we?" Kris asked you, not looking at your confused expression. "What ever do you mean?" You asked, patting on her shoulder. "You know..after we did.. that.." You hummed for a bit then came to realization "OH!.... girlfriends of course. What else?" You smiled, then frown a little. "A-are we not?" Kris quickly look at you and waved both of her hands. "Of course we are! I just...I thought you were only using me as a toy." You widened your eye and placed both your hands on your chest. "I could never Kris! I have loved you all these years. Why would I look at you like that if I didn't?" Kris nearly teared up and hug you tight. "I love you Y/N." "I love you more!"

#smut #gxg #gxg smut #kristina kuroda x reader #kristina kuroda

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thegempage · 1 year

Text

a scene that may or may not exist like this in a fic i have yet to write

"So..."

You pretend not to hear him. The Prince is sitting on the stonework just above you; if his voice didn't give him away, the purple boots that land on the ground next to you would. You were given explicit instructions not to speak with him, and considering you like having your head attached to your shoulders and not mounted on a wall where you have a sneaking suspicion they once had one of your relatives, teeth forced open in a snarl you've never really liked pulling, you intend to stick to that instruction. One of the maids told you about him in advance anyway; he's literally all bark and no bite, according to the servants about to rotate out, the ones who have been here the longest, he'll talk your ear off and understands if you don't respond.

("It's unfortunate," one of the other knights had mused, fiddling with ropes and knots while she showed you around. "You can tell he just wants to talk to someone, but he must've caught wind of the fact that we're not supposed to respond because he doesn't even talk like you're there. It's best to just let him get it out and he'll leave you alone.")

"This summer heat has been a real bitch. You'd think they'd give a guy some cooler clothes to work with when the sun literally lights shit on fire if the windows aren't open in the afternoons but nah, too easy, make him work for pants that aren't a thousand degrees."

You can't say you were expecting him to be so... foul mouthed. What appears to be two pant legs land next to the boot, suspiciously unconnected to a waistband.

"The name's Dave, by the way. I know you're probably a stickler for not calling me that because everyone Mom and Dad sends is a stickler for being all formal or whatever --" A cape flutters to the ground and you think he finally settles "-- but if you don't have a stick up your ass consider this official permission to just call me Dave."

(So much for acting like you're not there.)

"You seem different than the other knights they send, but in a cool way. Like, usually they send these big muscly types who talk about how great of a vacation this is. And they're nice and all, but you're actually taking this seriously, so clearly you've got something going on or Mom and Dad wouldn't have strangled you with it."

He says it so, so casually. It makes your blood run cold. You tense, your grip tightening on your sword pommel; you'd never strike at the Prince (you're not dumb enough to do that), but it's comforting to know you're armed.

"Don't sweat it, I'm not going to ask. Even if you could respond that's kind of a dick move. We're just locked up here together, you know? Those guys all have families and pubs they get to go back to with big bonuses and stories about how the crows follow the crown prince wherever he goes after a month, but I've been here my whole life. I don't know how long they've got you here, but considering you're standing right in front of the hallway to me and Rose's rooms I've gotta assume it's a while."

Rose must be the princess. You continue to stare straight ahead and do a pretty alright job of not jumping out of your skin when two hands descend and pull your helmet off. You didn't even -- You know you put that on correctly this morning, how the fuck did he --

"Rose has been showing me some tricks," he seems to answer your internal question. "Good job not slapping me, though, some of the knights they put here have a nasty habit of almost breaking my nose when I sneak up on them. Which, fair enough --" the Prince jumps down from the stonework and you see him for the first time, unfortunately, "-- they don't expect me to know about all of the little buckles it takes to put these suits on, even though a kid could probably figure it out."

The Prince is taller than you, as your gaze laser focused ahead allows you to see. The emblem of Derse is stitched across his tunic and his outfit seems to be missing a few pieces, especially his pants from the knees down. He fiddles with your helmet as he stands in front of you, and you don't even need to expand your senses to know he's staring at you. The one thing you can't tell is with what intent. You don't think he's malicious, perhaps curious? Your grandmother would tease that your scales show when you're nervous, but that was only with magic sight, could he have such an ability? His hands are darker than yours, especially against the clean silver of your helmet, and his nails are manicured and painted a muted red. When he taps them on the metal, you can just barely hear the sound of them making contact. He breathes in like he wants to say something, but lets it out, and the two of you stand in silence.

You dare a peek. No head movement, nothing that disrespectful, but your eyes trail up to see his face. His eyes are hidden behind round, dark pieces of glass spun together with gold wire, but you can't shake the idea that he's watching you; his hair is carefully cut and styled, the late afternoon giving him a sort of halo. His expression is carefully and meticulously put together to be neutral; you can't tell what he's hiding, but you know he's hiding something.

"Just once," he says, holding out your helmet. "Talk to me once. Just tell me your name."

You hesitate. His hand is shaking and he doesn't want you to know. So you don't; you take your helmet, eyes straight ahead with it held at your side, and you say only, "Karkat Vantas."

He smiles. "Nice to meet you, Karkat."

And then he leaves.

#little rock.txt #homestuck #ciaran does the art #writing #i would love to hear what you think btw!#i don't. know how to explain this jkfsdlafjk #there's a lot of lore happening. don't worry about it #focus on them meeting for the first time #future davekat implied #also. ngl. ywdmp has me considering making this soldavekat. but for now have these two #fairytale au

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thestalwartheart · 2 years

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I don't know if this counts as an unpopular opinion but: I am extremely conflicted about my feelings toward Madeleine's character, I don't like her but I also really don't hate her.

With Vesper and Bond, I loved that their love felt tangible even with the short amount of time they spent together. It never really felt too rushed to me and I think that Casino Royale did a great job at showing how love impacts Craig's Bond's work and personal life. On the contrary, Madeleine and Bond's relationship felt a little too rushed for me. It kinda felt like the Spectre was trying to mimic the type of love Vesper and Bond had but forgot what made Vesper and Bond's tragedy so good in the beginning. Casino Royale and Vesper/Bond was a lesson to be learned, a type of heartbreak that resulted from a romance that came hard and fast. Spectre just failed to create the same kind of hard/fast romance that they had. Madeleine Swann, as a character and the romance surrounding her, fell flat to me. The majority of her actions/dialogue either made me bored or slightly annoyed, she could've been so good if written a little bit better.

ON THE CONTRARY, though Madeleine is far from my favorite Bond Girl she is definitely not the worst person in the world. Sometimes it bums me to see how some people characterize her as someone vindictive or malicious (to the extent that some kill her in brutal ways in some fan works). Though the portrayal of her character was ehhhhh in the movies, the implications and the reasoning behind why she is the way she is is totally understandable. She went through a fair amount of trauma and I don't expect anyone to be able to just 'get over it'. She's strong in her desire to leave an unstable lifestyle behind and it peeves me when she's perceived as a 'villain'.

In short, they could've done better with her (and her relationship with Bond) but she's far from terrible. But it doesn't matter because in my delusions everyone's friends, okay. and the Aston Q recovered is still intact and definitely not shot up. : )

(sorry, I don't usually write that much so if this sounds all over the place it's because it probably is).

(also this is too long : P)

Unpopular/popular opinion or not, you've managed to capture my feelings on her almost exactly! I wasn't going to write much in response, but I've definitely gone too far, as always 😂

I hate comparing Bond women, but I did feel like Vesper was a more complete character, and you're absolutely right that their her and Bond's love seemed tangible. Whether that was down to the writing, the acting or the chemistry, I don't know. I found it a struggle to care about Madeleine much in SPECTRE, though I grew to really feel for her in during and after Matera. By that point, though, I thought her and Bond were a terrible match. Nor was I convinced by all the work the writers tried to do to convince us she was the only one who would ever truly "get" Bond. All in all, I was just left with the impression that she deserved better than she got. We're all flawed, and I'm not sure I'd have been any less disastrous/annoying in her place 😂

Beyond Vesper, I always got the feeling they were trying to call back to Tracy from On Her Majesty's Secret Service with Madeleine. Personally, I didn't think it worked particularly well, even if the end of NTTD managed a very poignant call back. I wish they'd just put some energy into fleshing out her character a bit better instead.

I'm going beyond the bounds of your ask and dipping my toes into some controversial waters here, but I do think there's space for a conversation around misogyny and fandom (as there is in any fandom where there's a well-loved M/M ship). Perhaps that's for another time (and for a conversation that includes Moneypenny too). Safe to say, I've gotten the 'ick' from a few conversations I've seen happening where people were really callous toward Madeleine. I don't think she deserves some of the hate she gets.

Having said that, I've read some darker takes on her in fics and found them interesting. I don't think they're necessarily misogynistic or bad because they exist. She was a "daughter of Spectre" after all, and sometimes it's fun to imagine what might have happened if she had betrayed Bond, but there are only a few authors I trust to explore the concept well. This might lose me a few hearts (sorry!) but I am constantly a little disheartened across most of my fandoms when the default is to kill off the main female love interest or make her evil. I think in the Bond fandom it stems from Madeleine being a very hard character to pin down, and in a lot of ways it's just easier to get rid of her. I'm not saying people always do it because it's easy, but the temptation is there.

Having said that, I've written her into exactly one fic (it might become a series one day), but outside that, I probably won't again. She feels too nebulous to me. I think she's a good person, but a weakly thought-out character. I much prefer her in fics where authors have tried to give her more of a voice. Mlle_Heloise's work has been especially key in improving my opinion of her!

I'm going to go and hide now 😂 Thank you for the ask! I know some people will have strong opinions on this, and I'm looking forward to the discussion!

Reminder that this is just my opinion, pls don't shoot. If you love her, I love that for you! If you don't love her, that's okay too. And please be kind to each other in the replies and reblogs!

#ask box #unpopular opinions #madeleine swann

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prnanxiety · 5 months

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12/7/23

One of my patients today has been struggling with paranoia. Normally paranoia is a psychotic delusional symptom, but this guy's paranoia has been brought on by amphetamine abuse. Which meant he had very paranoid behaviors and delusions, without any of the other positive or negative symptoms that usually come with psychosis.

Concern was whether or not his wife was poisoning him, so, he was very focused on the results of his urine toxicology. We went through them together; positive for amphetamines, cannabinoids, caffeine, etc, stuff he wasn't surprised about. Then there was another drug I couldn't trace; it was eight syllables long, started with a P, and was obnoxious to try to pronounce. I had to google it while we were talking; Some kind of ingredient used in over the counter medications, like cough syrups. I asked him what over the counter stuff he'd taken since he was outside of the hospital, and he got this new, alert look on his face and said "None."

He ended up spending the next several hours on the patient phones making phone calls while I tried to sort out what on earth this medication was. It was such a long name, without a brand name, and so common in OTC stuff that I had to think it was utterly benign. But this is a fixation for this guy, and if we don't get to the bottom of it while he's here, we run the risk of him going home and attacking his wife.

Life's been difficult for both of them. They were apparently a happy couple up until the birth of their new baby, for which the mother's been suffering post partum depression and the dad's been abusing adderall. Otherwise great, now they're at each other's throats, and he's starting to make threats. So we want to prevent this from getting worse if it can.

The trouble is, I've never met this guy's wife. I hear all sorts of stories in this job. For all I know, maybe she really is trying to poison him. So I can't tell him "Oh she definitely didn't," because I don't know, and I would never say "Oh I promise she's trying to kill you" unless I had a smoking gun. But this guy's paranoia was so bad, he was convinced it was, in fact, a smoking gun.

This just led to me spending a few hours this morning making phone calls to pharmacists, toxicologists, convening with the doctors personally, and even talking with state poison control. Lots of different suggestions and possibilities of where the drug came from, with promises of looking into it from supervisors. One person from poison control actually worried me; They talked about how the drug was apparently discontinued for human use in 2000 by the FDA, but could still be found in medications prescribed by Vets. I was absolutely NOT about to let the patient hear that possibility!

A few hours later I finally got a call back from the doctor of toxicology, who explained pretty simply; the ingredient is a byproduct of the production of adderall. That's why it showed up in the expanded urine drug screen by itself; if his wife was slipping him something else OTC, it would also be showing up in that expanded report, after all. I told the patient, he had a deep breath, thanked me for all that leg work. He actually took his first antipsychotics from me half an hour earlier, too. Seemed like he was willing to accept, "Okay, it's me. It's not my wife, it's me. I'm the problem."

The attending physician actually thanked me for alerting them to the new fixation on the mystery drug by the patient, because they'd been trying to work out whether he was safe for discharge this morning. This discovery indicated he wasn't yet. Got some pats on the back for how I handled all this actually!

His wife actually visited him tonight though, along with his parents. Looks like everyone wants to forgive each other and work together to get past this. I'm all for it.

#dear diary #diary entry #nursing #psych #psychosis #psychiatry #nurse #schizophrenia #cw: drugs #cw: addiction #paranoia #adderall #amphetamine

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cryptofadventure · 10 months

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🌻

new ask game send me a 🌻 and ill just tell you whatever the fuck i want

Ok so I'm a persona fan yeah?

I got into the series when 5 came out so naturally I played that first right????

....

How come I felt so fucking cheated when I played through Persona 4?

P4 has a better story, better humor execution, better relationships, better suspense, just better everything save for aesthetics (bc the concept of mysterious thieves and the use of symbolism got me in a chokehold). Dude I'm sorry but as much as I love the Phantom thieves their friendships weren't nearly as close as the Investigation Team and there were times where they were downright malicious to each other (and by that I usually mean Atlus trying to be """funny"" and shit on Ryuji in an uncalled for manner while Morgana is allowed to be a fucking massive creep).

Morgana is fucking disgusting and completely unlikeable and you cannot change my mind, Shido was a hallow villian that pales in comparison to Adachi, they fucked up how cool Akechi's character COULD HAVE BEEN for making him snitch on himself so fucking fast, Okumura's palace was complete dog shit, and Haru was completely robbed of a character from Mona having his little piss fit that literally added nothing to the story but a headache.

Teddie was so fucking loveable and silly I literally cannot understand why people hated him. Dude his ''''weird behavior''' he learned from Yosuke and Yukiko specifically and several of the first dungeons were promiscuous and this mfer has NEVER talked to another person before you expect him NOT to pick up on what he sees his friends doing??? And he never soley went after the girls he did this to EVERYBODY no one was safe from his weird flirting and that's what made it funny vs Mona who literally sexually harrasses a sexual harassment victim at any given moment that's supposed to be his friend and acts like a incel constantly. Him being the 'being of hope' and being this fucking disgusting and selfish is fucking laughable. Fuck that cat.

But moving on since I can literally complain about Mona's character for hours; Shido is weak as fuck. Bro Adachi had LAYERS like an onion bro. He was just a everyday guy and that's what made it fucked up; ANYONE could have fallen down that road. A perfect example is Yosuke; a kid down on his luck, treated like shit no matter how hard he tries, and is consumed by boredom. Had Yosuke's parents not loved him and had ne not met his friends he could have became an Adachi himself. Adachi does a good job at making you feel bad...to a degree. Like bro it sucks your parents didn't give a shit about you, it sucks you made a tiny mistake and got shipped out to the middle of nowhere, and it sucks your love life is non-existent but you ain't had to kill anybody lmao. Also you like him once he pulls the chad move of 'oh man is THAT what i used to sound like??? You're cringe, kill yourself.' to a actual god WHILE it's beating his ass.

In addition I'm so ass mad they removed the cut scenes that gave the Will Seeds has so much more story purpose. I think it's extremely important to see how the villians get to the way they are bc no one is just born fucking evil. They were all just normal people at some point that started tumbling down the wrong road. One I can easily talk about is Kaneshiro. Where I live, gang activity is rampant; you don't just choose that lifestyle. It's a lifestyle your pressured into, or you feel you have no choice, or you are influenced by your media/friends/family. It's hardly ever something you want to do (instagram mfers with guns and drugs that say they're about that life aren't. it's a front to look cool they'd die here in seconds). He was pushed around in a low income neighborhood presumably by other gangsters and he had no choice but to fall inline and when you see YOUR opportunity to be the big dog you take it because it's a dog eat dog world..but that still don't make you a sad beanie baby. You're still a monster for ruining other people's lives by repeating history.

Showing that would have made every villain so much stronger than what they are.

Having Akechi snitch on himself so fast and even without the pancake thing it was blaringly obvious he was a antagonist. How he hated them so passionately, even for his image, didn't make much for a surprise. Also going on about characters; Makoto's hate isn't deserved full stop. 'oH BuT She WantS To Be A pOlIce OffIcer She'S meAn TO TThe GrouP SHe'S a BoOtLiCkEr' shut the fuck up Stacey you on;t hate the police bc you think it's cool but if you were robbed you'd call for 911 before anyone else. Makoto's character was so painful; imagine you lose the parent you were so close to and never met the other and on top of that you have to watch your only sibling turn into a abusive, selfish monster that treats you like shit. And it doesn't stop there, because you're pressured to be the embodiment of the nerd emoji other students hate you and adults take advantage of you. Bro the principal literally went 'I'll destroy your college future if you don't figure out a case the police can't solve'. Bro WHAT.

Also Ryuji was done dirty, Kamoshida was also his villian not just Ann's. I don't care he was still assulted too; homie teased this kid about his drunk dad beating him in front of EVERYONE and broke his leg knowing FULL WELL he's not academically capable and can't go to college any other way that sports now he has to be uncertain about his future.

eh, where was I? I forgot. In short: Persona 4 handled everything better than 5 ever could and it makes me so sad bc 5 has such a good premise and aesthetic. It honestly makes me wanna re-write a good chunk of it and apply it to my P5 blog to satisfy the dweeb in me.

Oh bonus:

If you think Maruki is morally worse than Shido soley bc you're an Akechi simp I think your brain is smoother than a jar of fucking peanut butter and that you've the intelligence of a rock.

#ooc #i lost track lemme cut it here #Im sorry i love Persona but soemtimes it shits the bed hard

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nv-archives-archive · 11 months

Text

I'm bored, and I have some Town of Salem screenshots stored in my phone.

Why don't I share with you their stories? =)

Oh hey! I have a fanfiction written about this one! But because it only tells the end game, I'll tell the whole story here :P

It all began when I roll Arsonist.

Night 1: I get jailed. I claim Lookout and ask who they are and if they'd like me to be on them as though I don't already know who the Jailor is.

Day 2: I keep quiet most of the time, but I do try to contribute to discussions. I notice that 1 claimed Trans somewhere in midday, so I conjure up a plan: play around with my douses using this Trans.

Night 2: I attempt to douse 1. In my will, I am writing up a will pretending to watch the Jailor.

Day 3: I notice that the only person doused is still Jailor. They died to an SK they jailed. I was about to grumble about having only one douse, but then I had a realisation.

I whisper to 1

Did you trans yourself with 7?

Lookout N1: jailed N2: 7 vb 1

Yeah I did!

Checks out

So I am an LO in the eyes of this Trans, and Jailor died to SK so that means no TP was on them. Still, I refrained from posting publicly just in case a random visited the Jailor.

Night 3: I try to douse 1. 1 transd themselves with 5

Day 4: I send them my n3 to keep up with the lie, wherein I said I "watched" them and that I "saw" them visit themselves.

Night 4: I finally douse 1. 5 fucking dies.

Day 5: It is now me, the SK, and the Trans left.

My absolute tarnation bumfuzzle brainfarted and accused Trans as Maf.

Bruh you saw me visit myself

Oh.

I gotta hand it to SK for trying though. They were fighting so hard in this losing battle, insisting that Trans was Hypno.

So we lynched SK, and Town blew up on dead chat after getting slapped in the face with an Arso win. Trans left within seconds without saying a word.

You know what would've been funnier? If I lynched Trans instead and feasted on the mass reports lmao (my account is still clean as of 507 games)

I also have a fanfic written for this one.

I don't feel like sharing the whole story. The only interesting part was this Vet 1v1 with Amb. I just thought the will was funny.

This one has a very uninteresting early game. I only screenshot this because of end game.

Basically, I played silent SK and claimed Doc because Invest existed.

By the end, it was me, WW, and 2 Mafs alive. In their eyes, I was still Doc, so I said to Maf that I will side them and that I will lynch WW for them. WW didn't really argue and left after getting lynched.

Before night started, I taunted them.

I still have a self-heal left :)

By morning, photo happened.

Y'all don't need a story or context for that

Maybe except for the fact that my friend as Vamp always tries to bite me first night, so I whispered this to the Jailor before they died.

Also, I was Esc.

I have a fanfic and comic strip reserved for this one ;)

Ok, I saved the best for the last.

Get ready because this is gonna be one hell of a long pillion ego trip.

Once upon a time, I roll my favourite NK: Arsonist

Night 1: I was roleblocked. That's fine. At least I still get a douse through passive, and I know who rb'd me.

Day 2: No Maf kills. Esc was hellbent on getting me lynched there and then thinking I was MK. I managed to pull through the accusations by demanding that Esc visit me again, that I was a "Sheriff" trying to do his job.

No lynches were made that day.

Night 2: As expected, I was roleblocked again, but lookie here, I have another passive douse.

Day 3: Esc dies to Amb. Maf has made a kill. I made sure to rub it in their faces that Amb could not visit fellow Maf, and Maf got a kill thus nullifying the accusations on me. Sheriff began to push Cons. No lynches were made.

Night 3: aheheheheHEHEHEHE

Day 4: I hard push Amb, saying they were sus. Sheriff fights for spotlight and tries to get Cons out instead. Town favours me and lynches Amb first. I am now semi-confirmed.

Night 4: I get attacked AND HEALED?

Day 5: Sheriff whispers me asking who I "checked". I waited a bit for Doc to come out. Thankfully, Doc whispered me because I was about to take a 50/50 and almost accused Doc as Maf.

As soon as I said that my other passive douse was sus, they left the game. I am now hard confirmed.

Sheriff finally gets Cons out after my embarrassing rant about Jailor not exeing Cons when they were getting rb'd by another Cons. In my defence, Jailor was silent as hell. I didn't know who they was.

Night 5: I attempt to douse 4 who died to Jailor that night.

Day 6: Sheriff whispers me again who I "checked", and we apparently checked the same person.

We lynch last Maf claiming Survivor.

They thought it was GG. It was only me, Sheriff, Doc, Jailor, and Surv left. All hard confirmed... except for one.

It's the Surv claim! Exe them!

I felt bad for saying that, but I had to save my pillion first in case Jailor tried something.

Then, whadd'ya know. The whole town is in fire except for me and the Surv.

#town of salem #town of salem screenshots #do tell me if the coloured text bothers ya

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the-firebird69 · 2 years

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Not only is John rhema Lord a pain in the ass but it's these people too they keep on pushing him out and make him worse now than ever and worse than others even though he's very bad they're also caustic and they're going after targets of hours before we can get to them you see here there's chest is opened if you look carefully there's a fine line on this cranium and they failed to heal it they just glued it and it's a bad job no but you can see it and the guy will be revived but they open the brain case for some reason so we saw I noticed a while ago and we researched it and figured out that they're replacing people's brains after interrogation and it's this crew including her Trump is going after him and they'd be just dead if we didn't interfere because he's done it before and he's done it over and over and over again not right there is not Trump and it's not a Mac it's like a VGA and they're a weak player no weak players but they're not weak together and he heard it too you're going to get used up and we need the Intel and not helping them directly but we need the friction you know or else we won't get what we need so going after Trump and now and I'm sons of Intel's coming up here to where we are for free but we noticed we need more and what they're doing they open the chest cavity as a distraction no they're putting stuff inside and they're sending the head guy across the way the country or other to relay information about what he knows and what he's got so they hit him overseas somewhere and they pull them out and they do an autopsy and they're using his mules for their operation

Thor Freya

Shut up Trump you p**** I'm a little kid and I'm taking you down you should be embarrassed and people should see it as an example me and Stan put you in jail but Stan says I'm mostly pushed it and he went in regardless of how long you stay there you stayed there and you got raped you should back off me and you won't so I'm going to make you I got to get rid of your head I'm going to use the torso for I intended it to be used for not for what you're using it for you're using illegally you see it's not your property it's going to go to Australia and it's going to rule over Australia those are my clans lands and your head is going to die over and over before that

Zues Hera

I can't stand it we're not going to let you respond you can just sit there and spot off wherever you are like a mental patient like you are it turns society into a big mental freaking hospital and he's right you got to go there's no purpose to keeping you around this dumb s*** of things you can say and spew anything you want and code or not and you don't have a fleet you a******

Thor Freya

Yeah go ask BG a lazy freaking nut head

Zues Hera

I was going to say some stupid s*** but I get this go ask BG he's got tapes and videos and silver and so on and it can be faked and stuff but others might match up and if it does from a different angle and our stuff well I do understand what people are saying I'm saying it's his but it's really JC and Trump is a huge pushover for him I saw him getting pushed around him by him and so did his brother

Dan

Olympus

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phantomrose96 · 2 years

Note

oh don’t worry ABoT can definitely be a weekend read, i just read it start to chapter 39 from 2am to now (and still got a solid 8 hours of sleep somehow) ! couldn’t put it down honestly. amazing job at reconceptualizing the characters in this worst case scenario alternate universe in a way that feels believable and not contrived — not pulling any punches (ritsu and teru are … pretty awful, in particular) but not in a sensationalist dead-dove-dont-eat way at all which i really really appreciate. teru and ritsu are awful but ultimately sympathetic because they really do feel like natural extensions of their character arcs had canon played out differently. it would’ve been really easy to take this and make it into either an Everyone Is Evil I Am So Edgy story or a But They All Come Together Through The Power Of Friendship, so thank you for not doing that! while reigen is my favorite, i love ritsu & teru’s relationship — it’s so nuanced but well developed. cant wait to see what happens next!

(ABoT)

Oh you get it

Oh You Get It........

Hahahhahhhhhaaa.............................................

Literally when I saw the first ask before you sent the follow up, my first thought was like "!!!! you get it! gosh I wish that woulda applied to all those people from 2017-2018 who labeled ABoT torture p//or/n" but I wasn't gonna actually bring that up because like even talking about that time always feels like I'm putting myself on the defensive.

But.... god haha yeah..... I didn't write anything for almost 3 years after that. I thought about ABoT every damn day for that almost-3-year hiatus. It was already planned out! It had an ending! It just made me so sad because I believed I couldn't come back to it because I couldn't Do This Again.

It was just... utterly heart-breaking, utterly devastating, downright confusing how this fic which is so focused on the slow and messy and hard work of recovery was being branded "oh it's sadistic twisted fucked-up torture p//or//n of children and the author is a sick fuck".

I know it's dark!! It's dark and no one has to read it and I've tagged it for the things that are dark and I put content warnings in front of every chapter! But it's dark because I care about how much a tiny flicker of light can mean in the darkness.

I... care about media that doesn't just brush traumatic happenings under the rug and go "so that happened, anyway." I care about trauma that isn't ignored. I care about the characters who can't just brush it off - who come out worse because of it - I care about them and what the slow and ugly and sometimes backwards progress of recovery looks like. I care about characters who absolutely Fuck Up and face consequences for it. I care about characters who are messy and need time and cannot be fixed with a single nice word. I care about making the audience care about what the characters have lived through, and how it hurt them. I'm rooting for all the characters in ABoT. They're all trying to find their own flicker of light in the dark. I care so so so so so much about that.

And it absolutely destroyed me to see a whole group of friends in the fandom (who, mind you, were annoyed with ABoT for a while. I saw their posts show up when I searched 'ABoT', and who tried to pin a couple problematic labels on ABoT and couldn't get anything to stick until 'torture p//o//rn") rip apart ABoT's reputation because ALL they needed to say was "ABoT is an au where Mogami kidnaps and tortures Mob for 4 years. It's awful and gross and problematic and don't read it and if you do YOURE problematic."

And I saw it time and time again (again, in the ABoT tags! in MY tag, sometimes.) Someone would make a post like "if you're an ABoT stan don't follow me" and some clueless anon would be like "whats ABoT" and they'd answer the above and that was it. No one wanted to risk getting into "problematic" stuff so people just accepted it. Even more neutral people didn't have the time or reason to investigate that further and just accepted it, assuming whoever was speaking had read it, even if in reality none of them had.

I got death threats. They made hate-blogs of ABoT. They made memes shitting on ABoT. They spammed the ABoT tag and the phantomrose96 tag. They spammed sandflake's tag and drove them away same as me. They raided and spammed the ABoT discord. They made posts celebrating how long it had been since ABoT updated. They made posts trying to accuse me of pe//do//philia (for NO reason. NONE. NO REASON. NO EVIDENCE. It was just an effective word to get people run off the site. and luckily that accusation died because there was literally nothing to base it on.) ALL the while framing what they were doing as totally in the right because they were JUST calling out torturous child-abusing fic.

I really tried. When all this started, I stopped tagging anything ABoT related with m/p/100, so I wouldn't bother people. If I found ABoT art tagged with m/p/100, I'd wait a day to reblog it so it wouldn't accidentally rise high in the tag and bother people. Sometimes I WOULDN'T reblog art because I didn't want the artist to risk getting threatened. I mostly stopped talking about ABoT on tumblr, so I wouldn't bother people.

But it fucking gets to you after a while. I started believing they were right. My mental health was extreme garbage at this time (for reasons unrelated to this all) but that meant I couldn't brush any of it off. ABoT was kinda the one little spark of joy I had at this time and then I just. Didn't anymore. It got taken away.

I would write every sentence through the lens of my worst critic. I tried SO many times to start chapter 25 back in 2018. I could only get a page in at most. (Originally it was going to be the mall movie theater scene that ends up happening in chapter 27) and I'd balk at jokes I was trying to write. There was going to be a joke about the movie being a sort of in-universe Twilight, where the two love interests uncannily resembled Ritsu and Teru. And I froze up because. Was that problematic? If Teru was seeing the movie because Mei wanted to, was that sexist? If Teru himself wanted to see it, was that homophobic? Was the Twilight reference problematic? Was the joke about the love interest resemblance problematic? Would the irreverence of the joke be problematic? Would this be what they get me on? Would this be my undoing? Would this be the final nail in my coffin?

I found these old drafts somewhat recently and they are just. Lifeless. They are so barren of any kind of passion or heart. I re-read it and see just how painful it was to get from one sentence to another. I was burnt out and afraid of every word and those drafts would never ever have worked.

Hell, when I did write chapter 25 for real, in 2020, I gave up entirely on making it the movie scene. Trashed that. Started from scratch. That well was far far too tainted to draw from.

I just. aaa. aaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Sorry for the long post but ahhhhhhh. I gave up my favorite and most meaningful hobby for almost 3 years. This was still happening in 2019 when season 2 aired, when I hadnt been truly active on Tumblr for ages and hadn't touched ABoT in years. JUST so they could be sure to taint the well again and tell any new fandom comers to stay away from ABoT. I had no spoons and no spine for it so I just, let that happen, and unfollowed the ABoT tag. I still haven't seen season 2.

I'm so SO glad I figured out how to come back to it in 2020, and that people have been so supportive, and I mostly try not to talk about this stuff but. it fucks with you. it fucks with you a lot.

I'm just really happy to have been able to come back to it.

#ask #abot #lengthy post #[image transcriptions are in the alt text]#i just sdhjsdhsdhhjhj thank you I care so much about making it meaningful!!! i care about the bright spots and i care about exploring when #its okay to not be okay i skshjshjshjhjhjhjhhj #i got myself a little worked up but im good

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