#it would be a cute elder-teacher dynamic

[theartgremlin2]

Apparently people are complaining about this week’s Bad Batch s2 episode being uninteresting. While I was a little bored while watching, that has more to do with the episode’s pacing than it’s actual content. The comparison between Tech and TAY-0 made it quite fascinating to me.

One of my main gripes about Tech has been how underdeveloped his character is. He’s the smart one! He’s got a big, beautiful brain and an ego to match. Occasionally, he behaves a bit robotically because of how direct and literal he takes things. I don’t think I’m the only one who has felt like that. It seems to me that the writers realized it too, which is why TAY-0 is the perfect person to contrasted against Tech in this little character study of an episode.

TAY-0 was quite capable of doing his job. He was the current champion racer when we are introduced to him. Cid wouldn’t have bet so much on him if she didn’t have every confidence in him. We’ve seen her do it with Omega, and she clearly thought she would win that wager with Millegi. Not only is TAY-0 a competent Pilot, he is also relatively intelligent. He knows how to fix his speeder, and how to re-assemble himself. He even has a certain sense of art, though that isn’t really explored. He is very similar to Tech in that he has an inflated ego. This is likely from all the praise and popularity his skill as a pilot earns him in the races. However, TAY-0 has one glaring flaw: he’s inflexible.

The move where the two rival pilots who trap their opponent and saw into their speeder is not a new strategy. The announcer and the crowd all know what’s going on when a pilot gets trapped between these two in the tunnels. TAY-0 has seen these rivals do this likely several times, and yet he is incapable of adapting to the situation when it happens to him. In addition to this, when Tech is attempting to repair him, TAY-0 insists that Tech is doing it wrong. He cannot imagine the possibility that there might be another, possibly even better way to re-assemble himself. And this inflexibility is why TAY-0’s ego comes off so gratingly. He behaves as though he knows best in every situation because he is a great racer! There is no need for him to learn anything from anyone else!

Tech is already a magnificent pilot. We have witnessed him flying the Marauder in ways that rival Anikin Skywalker’s ingenuity. He has probably gotten the Batch out of more tight spots than you could count on all you and your closest friend’s fingers and toes combined! In contrast to TAY-0, however, Tech has the humility to admit when he doesn’t know something. He does not claim that his experience piloting the Marauder makes him just as good a racer as the droid. Instead, he recognizes that this is a different skill, and spends time familiarizing himself with it before he decides he can do it. And once the race is over, he does not soak in the praise that the racing fans pour on him. He savors the glory for a moment, accepts the praise, and moves on.

This is not something I ever thought I would say, but Tech’s humility is what makes him a compelling character. He can be a smartass. He can be annoyingly correct. This actually put me off the character in the first season. I was not a big fan of Tech. But he can also be endearingly eager to learn. S2e2 even foreshadowed the closer look at Tech’s humility we were going to get by allowing him a moment of revelation when Romar points out to him that the Serennians had existed before they became Separatists.

This development has softened me a little towards the character, and I can’t wait to see more of him!

#tech bad batch #tbb tech #tbb season 2 spoilers #the bad batch season two #character analysis #episode analysis #am I the only one who wants TAY-0 to get a little development from this too? #please let him have a think and realize that maybe he’s not the Force’s greatest gift to being-kind #I also really hope that Tech and Romar become good friends #it would be a cute elder-teacher dynamic #GremlinReflections

[katyspersonal]

And perhaps some headcanons on Maria & Gehrman 🥺 if you want to

Back to the cute ship headcanons scheduled program!

💔 Damn, I used to write Gehrman as that tormented, traumatised, emotional brick of a man orphaned as a child and only having found peace, healthy outlet for his obtained negative impulses and development as a very inventive individual thanks to very patient and loving adoptive parents! Who only first felt WHAT IS LOOOVE~ at the age of like, 50, and towards Maria, hahah. The core of that interpretation still stands, and I think Hunter's Dream doesn't really age people, and Gehrman was getting "older" only mentally, so the two would still have about 20 years of an age gap, yeah; Not necessarily a damning thing - various sorts of dynamics can happen, and they are not always inherently dysfunctional!

🌻 Despite Maria idealising him and being really impressed by his skills as monsters hunter / archaeologist, she would not be quite all that shy and coy, far be it. She could still object him and speak her honest mind if she deemed it appropriate - a trait he appreciated in people dearly, having (unintentionally) appeared to be 'menacing' in his younger years (not to mention the absolutely abnormal height). Her sincerity, sometimes even naive one, was one of the things that attracted him!

💔 I believe that Maria was the one to teach other Old Hunters, Gehrman included, the Art of Quickening; it seems to be a very Pthumerian thing (the elder, man), and it is implied it's her bone that Paleblood Hunter can use to do the trick! It was one of the instances of 'a student having something to teach to the teacher'. Gehrman would quickly get accustomed to treating the younger woman as an equal, which resulted in him at times venting to her about his middle-aged man grudges, harsh past and fuckin health issues. Maria was feeling awkward, but not in the bad way; not only she was glad to help out a friend that Gehrman became, but also could confirm those were not the cringiest things she heard ahahah

🌻 They could discuss engine and effectiveness of weapons, battle tactics, history of wars and weapons creations and so on for HOURS. This stuff is Gehrman's special interest that makes his eyes spark with enthusiasm and adds life in his otherwise sad and detached manner of speaking, whereas Maria was a good listener, and genuinely interested on her own as a Knight with noble motivations to protect the humanity from "monsters" looming over. Gerhman could not help but felt very moved by a person who is not only much younger, but also A GIIIIIRL o_o o: 🤯 to listen about this stuff with so much interest and comprehension. She asked very interesting questions, too.

💔 In trying to be more like him, Maria was trying to pull the "no cutesy!!!" mentality, regardless of still loving flowers, ribbons, animals (especially baby ones) and other adorable stuff. She wanted to be tough to impress him more, so that side of her would be pushed aside more and more. The plot twist? Gehrman himself is a HUGE fucking softie loving dolls, flowers, tea-parties and all that! He himself was trying to repress that side of him, to create the image of a tough badass mentor only knowing how to kill - especially for Maria. Basically, they both turned out to be total idiots upon trying to impress one another with how Tough TM they would be xD

🌻 It does not mean that they are not ALSO tough, however! Maria was the one to remove his beasthood-infected leg and carry his injured ass all by herself to seek help; and Gehrman once killed an Executioner guy that tried to have a go at Maria when she was succumbing to vampiric blood-lust and was able to talk her down into sanity all by himself. All not to mention how most of the hunts they were paired together; a common practice amongst hunters, so no beast will creep from behind (check Gascoigne + Henryk). They saved each other at least once with just the power of their loyalty and the character.

💔 I do believe there was a window in the timeline for Maria and Gehrman to have had dated, actually, before initial breakup with Maria abandoning the hunt and being greatly disappointed in Gehrman for seeing Laurence's ass and not being able to say no 'madness of his curiosity'. But, I do think they'd have a hella hard time coming together, both being very shy and uncertain about it. Gehrman would feel very self-conscious about being 'too old and broken' for the young, beautiful and energetic person like her, not willing to burden her with his old man shit; meanwhile, Maria would (falsely) assume he already has a lot of simps, among older and more experienced women (or men, for that matter) and she risked losing his respect and approval by even trying to flirt. It would be their friends like Henryk, Matias (Blood Minister from cutscene) and maybe even Ludwig and Laurence themselves that would see the Tension (TM) and try to talk to them about it or set them up together so they could break it. For some reason, in my stuff every single ship with Maria comes down to 'just fucking TALK already AAAAAAAA' fsdhfhds

🌻 TMI but Gehrman would be not the best lover, actually...? (subjective hmmm) His style is to go too slowly, give too many kisses, feel too strongly too intensely, fondle every bit of the person's body... and then fuckin' fall asleep on them from the sheer feelings of warmth and tenderness overwhelming him fdjhfhsdf If something was to ever happen between the two, Maria would have to take the lead, as someone who sure has a tender side, but is not THAT much of a slave to it, hahah. But they probably never had a 'something', some couples just vibe and are happy like that, you know?

💔 Their first kiss was probably on a bet by playing with friends, though. Again - they were very shy and hesitant, fully sure that the other did not feel the same, whereas having cringe gremlins for friends that wanted to help them to come to terms with their attraction hahah. (you dipshits smh)

🌻 In plenty of ways, actually, my version of Gehrmaria is just hetero ship version of Valtr x Yamamura. A battle-hardened ruthless killer mentor figure and a young, passionate warrior with fair share of naivety but also a great potential. Gehrman was as inspiring for Maria with his stoicism as Valtr was inspiring to Yamamura with his rage and passion.

💔 "Okay, no, for reals, enough with the 'Gerhman ruined Maria's masculinity with the Doll' takes. Where are the 'Gehrman's FEMININITY was not allowed to show off so he projected hard' takes?" (c) quotes of great Russian girls. For real though, imagine Maria helping Gehrman to pick a dress and being THE source of approval x) It is all light-hearted, of course, as you know I jiggle like 5 version of why Doll is Like That and all of them are nice to Gehrman's character, but I think this dynamic would be the cutest!

🌻 Actually, most of the times I see this ship as best friends that simply hug and kiss ... more often than 'friends' would do that, let's say so. When they would not hunt, or perhaps in a "happy"/modern AU - they would go on adventures and explore, especially abandoned and historical places. Just experiencing the world together and being fucking NERDS. Absolute fucking NERDS about most of the things. When they do not share the interest - it is always one being a great listener!

💔 It might feel a little sad, but I imagined them preferring to adopt a child (if they'd ever get to that stage of relationship) rather than having one of their own. Maria would fear to pass the 'evil', 'bloody' genetics, and Gehrman would respect the concern - whereas having his own motivation to give care and love to "discarded" child that he once was. They would be a really good couple of adoptive parents, really. Not something that was meant to happen in canon, of course. Hahaha! Imagine an AU where they absolutely destroy the Choir and instead take all the orphans as their adopted kids! Now, if they only still had balls after Laurence's influence, huh?

stares at Laurence like in this meme:

_______________________

Thank you for the ask! I know this was more the 'dynamic' rather than the ship itself, but I tried! For me it is just one of those ships in which types of love kinda blur, so it is hard to say what type of companions they'd be determined as. I do still think they used to be very close, regardless of what kind of a bond it was!

#*glares very audibly at laurence* #bloodborne #gehrman the first hunter #lady maria of the astral clocktower #gehrmaria #ask replies #bloodborne headcanons #ships

[phantomchick]

Naruto Fic Rec Masterpost!

The Last To Know by KuriQuinn Oneshot, Gen, Teen and Up, Team Seven, Sakura and Sasuke, Sakura and Team 7, Canon Compliant, Angst with a Happy Ending, trust, broken trust, forgiveness, hurt/comfort, this fic is fantastic and made me have so many feels for the characters as well as the bonds between them, Character Dynamics,

Summary: As usual, telling her the truth happens as though by afterthought. And this time, she's not taking it.

i'll always be there for you by RecklessWriter Oneshot, Gen, Itachi and Sasuke feels, sibling feels, Light Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Hypothermia, Uchiha Sasuke Needs a Hug, Big Brother Uchiha Itachi, a part of me niggles over team 7 failing a mission but I pretend that they ran into the hunter nin afterwards and Kakashi got the scroll back, it do be like that sometimes, Good big brother Itachi, Bad big brother Itachi, it’s complicated, Feels,

Summary:

He’s pressed against something warm. There are fingers carding gently through his hair, scratching lightly at his scalp.

“Nii-san,” Sasuke whispers.

The hand in his hair freezes.

Sasuke gets thrown into a frozen lake. Itachi doesn't know how to stop being a big brother, even when he's supposed to be pretending he doesn't care.

The Beautiful Orange Thing by zafiro Oneshot, Gen, Naruto and Kurama, Naruto is a very lonely kid and the kyubi is a very lonely bijuu, Pre-Naruto Canon Era, chibi-Naruto, Naruto loves Orange, Kurama tolerates Naruto because he is Cute, sweetness and light, angst and fluff, so cute I wanna physically hug this fic to my chest

Summary: Naruto arrives at a weird place and finds something wonderful there.

Maslow by FriendshipCastle Oneshot, Gen, T for cursing, canonical child neglect, Iruka feels, Naruto feels, implied/referenced child abuse, but nothing worse than what’s in canon, angst, hurt/comfort,

Summary: The first four tiers of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Human Needs applied to Naruto’s depressing childhood. Alternatively: Iruka slowly becomes the best replacement mother a ninja could have.

take the fight from the kid by theformerone Oneshot, Gen, Team Bonding, Team as Family, Team 7, Canon Compliant, but can be read as divergent, Post Wave arc, Pre-Chuunin Exams,  

Summary: Training with his team is different than it was before the mission to Wave. Sasuke notices how things have changed.

A Clean Break by GwendolynStacy Oneshot, Gen, Teen and Up,  Hatake Kakashi and Team 7, Team as Family, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Team Fluff, Kakashi feels, Self-Harm via compulsive hand washing, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Happy Ending,

Summary: Every member of Team 7 has their personal set of demons to haunt them. While Kakashi is always prepared to lend his students a listening ear, he still hasn’t quite figured out how to ask for help when he’s the one crumbling.

The Beginning and the End by QuinsValoria Oneshot, short oneshot, gen, THIS HAD ME SOBBING OVER KUSHINA AGAIN EVEN THOUGH IT’S SO SHORT, pre-canon era, angst, Dont worry kushina, Your baby makes it out just fine, cries into laptop screen, Hurt/Comfort,

Summary:

“Motherhood: All love begins and ends there.” —Robert Browning

Uzumaki Kushina is an amazing mother, even in the very short time she has left.

OR

Kushina comforts her baby.

The Prince Of Leaves And Deep Water by RayShippouUchiha Ongoing, 3 chapter fic, do you ever read a fic with language that is so pretty and evocative that you just want to lean into it, like a kid listening to a piece of folklore that’s been passed down, it’s just beautiful to read? And the words slice and cut into your feelings in the best of ways, angst, hurt/comfort, drama, Kushina feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Uzumaki Lore, well worth the read even as a stand alone should it never update again, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Canonical Child Neglect, Uzushio feels,

Summary: ‘Protect him,’ Kushina prays in the quiet of her own mind as she leaves; pleading silently to the old spirits from her childhood, to the things that the Uzumaki Elders used to whisper about in hushed tones.

‘Love him,’ Kushina begs of the things she only knows from instinct and half remembered stories, those things filled with the power of salt and sun and deep deep waters.  Those things that live and thrive in the heart and soul of every Uzumaki who has ever breathed and battled and bled.  'Guide him, keep him safe for always.  But love him most of all. My little prince of eddies and leaves.’

Left behind, left alone and cold where before there was only a soft sort of warmth and a steady kind of safety, Naruto wails.

Final Evaluation by Do_the_Cool_Whip Completed, 5 Chapter Fic, Gen, Umino Iruka & The Rookie Nine, Iruka-Sensei, Feels, fluffy, I have so many emotions about Iruka being the best teacher in the elemental nations and this fic brought them all out to play, Excellence, Kakashi is a troll, a huge troll, like, he’s such a troll he’s a mountain troll, Asuma is a lesser troll, like he’s mostly decent but still infuriating so he’s a bridge troll, Kurenai is so cool that even when she’s trolling as is her right and duty as the jounin elite she is, the person she’s trolling still respects her for it, a river troll, the kids are so cute and young here, you can really feel Iruka’s affection for them, please revel in the wonderful that is this entire fic, revel I say

Summary: Progress evaluations are one-on-one consultation meetings between academy students and their teacher. Their purpose is to inform academy students of their strengths and weaknesses and guide them down their ideal path to becoming a strong shinobi. Upon graduating the academy and passing their jounin-sensei test, new genin return to the academy for one final consultation. (Or: The story of what happens when Umino Iruka uses his final meetings with his students as way to send them off to become the best shinobi they can possibly be.)

it takes a village by quillofferings Oneshot, Gen, snapshot series, angst, character insight, konoha 12, rookie 9, team Gai, team 10, team 8, team 7, repeating patterns and revelations, kinda gives a sense of the culture of a childhood in Konoha in a way that’s very quietly tragic, this story was written well before shippuden came out but it still reads mostly true to me, A Classic of the Fandom,

Summary: A Naruto snapshot series in the form of a oneshot.

spirals by nescione Gen, Oneshot, Team Seven, Generations, Team 7, Dai Nana Han, Spirals, Repeating Patterns, things happening the same across generations in repeating patterns is a big theme in the canon and lots of fic delve into it and play with the whole idea as a result, but this fic does it especially well, Team as Family, Angst, Fluff, Angst with a Hopeful Ending, A Classic of the Fandom, Summary: From the sannin to the present- a look at how history repeats itself, and how it doesn't.

this, and love too, will ruin us by RecklessWriter Oneshot, Gen, Itachi and Sasuke feels, Naruto Feels, Short and Sweet, Angst, Whump, Brother Feels, Sibling feels, Uchiha Sasuke Needs a Hug, Naruto Uzumaki Needs a Hug,

Summary: Naruto remembers the first time he saw Sasuke and Itachi.

He remembers looking at them and thinking, I wish I had someone who loved me like that.

Ten Facts About Team Yamato by Lisse Oneshot, Gen, short and sweet, Team 7 feels, Team as Family, Dai Nana Han, Team Seven, Team Yamato, characterisation, short but solid, Ficlet,

Summary: On paper, their team doesn't exist.

Troubling New Developments by SicTransitGloria Oneshot, Teen and Up, hilarious, pre-shippuden, Team as Family, Kakashi pov, Team 7, AHAHAHAHA,  Puberty hits the genin,

Summary: Kakashi takes a moment to wrap his mind around equating Ino’s chest with enemy shinobi while Asuma begins beating his head against the table and groaning about how he didn’t sign up for this. Rated for language and the general horror that is puberty

Of Harrowed Hearts by Sable_Scribe Ongoing and possibly (probably) Abandoned, Gen, Long Fic, we’re at 36 chapters in as of the time I’m posting this, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix It, Families of Choice, Team Seven, Team as Family, Bamf Kakashi, Good Teacher! Kakashi, Angst, Uzushio Lore, Fluff, Uzushio Feels, Uzumaki heritage, Bamf Team 7, BAMF Rookie Nine, Naruto's ability to make friends with giant chakra demons surfaces early, Rookie Nine, Rookie 9, Konoha 12, Naruto and Kurama,

Summary Naruto has been hearing the rumbling growl in the back of his head for as long as he can remember. He’s seven when he tries to talk to it for the first time. He’s the dead last, the failure at everything, so he doesn’t actually expect to succeed. And when he’s suddenly standing, knee deep in murky water and face to face with a demon, he has no idea what to expect. As it turns out, the world could use something unexpected.

Automatic by Dayadhvam Oneshot, Gen, Sand Siblings, Fluff, Team as Family, but also, Family as Family, Short and Sweet, A Classic of The Fandom

Summary: Gaara's shield defense is automatic: he has never had to consciously think about ordering the sand where it is needed. Kankurou and Temari have always known this.

As Is the Sea Marvelous by blackkat Mature, Gen, Eleven Chapter Fic, Warring States Era, Uchiha Madara/Senju Tobirama, Izuna Lives AU, everybody lives nobody dies, Hurt/Comfort, brotherly feels, sibling relationships, Angst With A Happy Ending, Insecurity, Self-Sacrifice, Imprisonment, Fix-It

Summary: Tobirama is willing to give absolutely anything for Hashirama and his dream. Including his life.

A Lesson In Trust by Live Gen, Oneshot, Shikamaru & Naruto friendship, academy days, trust exercise, fluff

Summary: All Iruka wants is for his class to start trusting each other, too bad Shikamaru would rather watch the clouds...

Snow Is Serious Business When Your Business Is Being A Kid by vulcanhighblood Gen, Oneshot, Iruka and Naruto, Umino Iruka is a Good Teacher, Uzumaki Naruto Needs a Hug, Fluff, Snow

Summary: Iruka's trying to teach his class, but the first snowfall of the year makes keeping their attention more difficult than he would have liked.

The Consequences of Winning by tabjoy13 Oneshot, Gen, Team 7, Protective Hatake Kakashi, Hatake Kakashi is a Good Teacher, Team Bonding, Team Dynamics, Team Feels, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Hatake Kakashi, Hatake Kakashi Is Trying, Wave Mission

Summary: Three days. It had been three days since Zabuza’s attack, since Kakashi passed out, and since Team Seven took refuge in the bridge builder’s home. Three days and Kakashi hadn’t shown a sign of stirring. Three young genin are left with the question: now what? Cross posted on FF.net.

discendo docemus by llamallamaduck Mature, Ongoing, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Trauma/Ptsd, Uchiha Sasuke-centric, Good Orochimaru, A lot of talk about depression and mental instability, Also Sharingan fuckery and assorted eye-trauma, rarepair, Itachi & Sasuke, eventual Sasuke/Ukitake, Itachi & Tsunade, 

Summary: There are some things a seven-year-old psyche is not ready to endure. An S-ranked torture technique preformed by a traumatized thirteen-year-old is one of those things. Sasuke doesn’t enjoy hallucinating memories of his murdered family day in and day out, but he’s learned to be philosophical about such things. It’s everything else that’s the problem, really.

Nidaime Otokage by DuskBeforeDawn Ongoing, inspired by nukenin, Time Travel, Dimension Travel, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Protective Hatake Kakashi, BAMF Hatake Kakashi, BAMF Dai-nana-han,Team 7, Team as Family, Non-Konoha Shinobi Kakashi, Hatake Kakashi is a Troll, Kage level Kakashi, Hatake Kakashi-centric, fluff, adventure, crack, mature, fun read

Summary: No one knew him.His father was still alive.His Sharingan acted like it had always been his.Kakashi was twenty-two years in the past of a different world.

French Kissing, the End of the World, and Other Impossible Ordeals by Tsume_Yuki Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto, Female Uzumaki Naruto, Time Travel, Uchiha Sasuke Being an Asshole, Protective Uchiha Sasuke, BAMF Uzumaki Naruto, Time Travel Fix-It, Smitten Uchiha Sasuke, grumpy asshole/cheerful optimist, this fic is literally just Sasuke being soft for Naruto, Mature but like it’s fiiine the author could’ve left it at teen and up and it would’ve gotten a pass at least from me

Summary: This is it, centuries of excellent genetics, of carefully selected marriages to maximise the potential of future generations and it’s going to be Sasuke who introduces idiocy to the Uchiha bloodline. The ancestors must be rolling in their graves. In which Sasuke is smitten, Naruto is a badass, and time travel happens.

No Tomorrow by Authorship Uchiha Shisui, Uchiha Clan, Shisui Lives, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Longfic, Completed, Found Family, Fix It, Mature, Time Travel, Fuck Danzo

Summary: The water was crushing, pummelling Shisui's broken form, even as it swept him further and further from Konoha. 

And then Shisui woke up.

It's two months until the day he died. Two months to change the current of his life, of his Clan, of his village. And Shisui has no intention of letting history run its course.

¦ part 1 ¦ part 2 ¦ part 3 ¦

#Naruto #fic recs #fic rec list #fic rec masterpost

[tentendeservedbetter]

home is where my team is - Chapter 3

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Read also here: AO3 | FFNET

“Today will be the final test I have to take in order to become a Genin, just as you and father have been before. Please, watch over me.” 

She bowed slightly, her hands together in a prayer sign in front of her nose, before opening her eyes and pushing herself off of her knees to stand. She quickly patted her black pants, getting rid of any left over lint from the pillow she sat on, and she stared at the Dainichi Buddha that stood tall and proud with his eyes closed, in the middle of the elevated floor surrounded by the four other slightly shorter Buddhas on each cardinal sides. 

Lines of black tiles, rectangular and short with white paint engraved in kanjis, sat in rows and columns along ascending stairs that flanked beside the Buddhas closer to the wall, with bigger tiles reserving their spots closest to the statues. The big tiles soon transformed into framed photos with a tablet in front of it as you descended the stairs, with the most recent addition being the only one in colour. 

The Hyuuga Shrine found in the northern part of the Hyuuga Compound is a homestead for the gods and the names of their ancestors and recently departed. While the Konoha cemetery was where most of their relatives would be buried, allocated under their appropriate place reserved for specific clans or among the fallen, this shrine was more so a safekeeping of their past, of their legacy, and of their tradition. The walls, though faint and dull from age, had traces of paintings of the Hyuuga clan's rich history and unique style of fighting, tracing all the way back to before the formation of Konoha as they know it today.

Rarely did Hinata come to the family shrine to pray, and rarely does she pray at all. She was unsure i f she truly believed in the gods that protected their family, and she was much more unsure of whether the spirits of her ancestors were truly watching over her. If anything, they were probably looking down at her with disappointment in their eyes and disapproving shakes of the head at how the heiress of the Hyuuga Clan turned out.

Poor Lord Hiashi,  they were probably whispering amongst themselves.  It was bad enough that he had no sons, but the eldest daughter is weak in nature! What will become of the Hyuuga clan at if Hinata were to remain heiress?

She only came to the shrine when she needed time alone and away from the entire compound, a place where she may talk freely to the air and without having to feel the weight of disappointment from the elders of her clan. Solace was found in the shrine that was hidden amongst the trees, away from prying ears and scrutinizing glances. Though, it was the limited access to the shrine that allowed the shrine to be almost always empty; this sanctuary is only allowed to be accessed by the lucky few that were born into the Main House of the clan.

The lucky few like herself.

Hinata wasn't fond of that rule, thought she was never fond of  anything  concerning the divide between the Main House and the Branch House. She was taught from a young age about the relationship between the houses from the elders that watched over her: the Main House was the brain of the clan, the most important organ that allowed all the knowledge and secrets hidden within this family to carry on throughout the generations, while the Branch House was the vessel that protected this important organ, working only as a reactionary mechanism of the Main House. 

The Branch House's purpose in life, the reason they were born, was to protect the Main House from outsiders who sought to obtain the ultimate knowledge of the Hyuuga Clan, and inherently, want to obtain their prized kekkei genkai: the Byakugan.

But the shrine is a place for someone to seek solace and guidance in the gods, with the Buddhas being those who transcended into omnipotence, a teacher to all who wish to pursue their knowledge. 

Why, then, should the Branch Family, who, despite only being seen as protectors of the Main Family, not be allowed to enter this shrine that praises the gods that guided the principles of their clan? Do they not carry the same clan name? If their sole duty is to protect the Main House, then they are in an equally honourable position as them; without the members of the Branch House, the Main House lineage would have to fend for themselves. They should have the right to seek solace, the same right as the Main House have to seek faith.

That’s what Hinata wished she could say. 

But she knew that the house dynamic in the Hyuuga clan was much more complicated than that, running deep into the roots of their lineage. She knew it was a game of power, a game of authority. They were the Hyuuga clan, after all, and they were considered to be one of the most prestigious clans in Konoha, one of the four noble clans to actually found the village; control was a given to a clan as secretive and powerful as her own.

That’s why they performed that cruel technique that even the Hokage had to turn a blind eye to; to maintain power and control.

Maybe one day she could change the way the Hyuuga clan was. Maybe one day, the Main House would come to co-exist with the Branch House in a more equal way. But if she wanted to do any of that, she needed to be stronger than she is now.

And the only way to do that is to pass today’s test.

If you’re there, Mother,  Hinata thought as her eyes returned back to the coloured image along the ancestral lineup. The woman in the photo, with deep blue hair that hung behind her shoulders with a few strands shaping her face and pale irises, looked back at her with a soft smile.  Please give me the courage you had.

She took her white hoodie and backpack from the floor beside where she sat and put it on as she started to walk across the wooden floor towards the doors of the shrine. As she gets to the bottom of the stairs, she took one last breath of the incense scented room. 

She had plenty of time to spare before heading out to the Hokage Rock, her usual morning practice session (or, as she liked to think of it, her usual morning  torture session) with her father and grandfather was put on hold for the time being. But first she had to pick up her lunch from the kitchen- her grandmother was likely there to make sure Hinata would pack more than enough to eat, insistence that if she wanted to become stronger for the clan, she would build her body that way. 

It was conflicting with what all her aunties would say. They would tell Hinata to cut down on the food, or else she would gain weight.  Or worse , they would say when her grandmother mentions being stronger,  you’d look like a guy with big muscles . It didn’t help that ever since she turned 10, for some reason, her waist had gotten wider and her chest was bigger than most girls her age. Luckily, the hoodie she had was not only useful for the cool January weather they have in Konoha, but also helped hide her body from judging eyes.

She crossed a short way into the main house found in the centre of the compound, trying to maintain her step as she crossed the floorboard that lined around the perimeter of the house. She kept her eyes glued to the ground whenever she could see an elder Hyuuga walking down the hall, trying to ignore them and save herself from an impending lecture. 

As she entered the hallway towards the kitchen, Hinata turned the corner quickly, when she suddenly felt a sharp collision with someone that made her rebound back onto the floor. 

Her face twisted slightly at the pain of her nose hitting against the other person’s shoulders, and she let out a small ‘ow’. 

“Watch where you’re-” a sharp voice suddenly scolded her, before abruptly stopping. Hinata looked up towards the person she had just hit, and she could feel a slight sense of dread building up in her stomach.

“O-Oh,” Hinata managed to mumbled, as she scrambled to get herself up, not wanting to seem completely knocked out from what was a simple collision (even though her nose was still stinging). "Neji-niisan."

Her cousin stood before her in his usual shinobi garb of brown shorts and eggshell washed shirt, looking down at her from his slightly taller stature, his angular eyes narrowing. His headband with the Konoha symbol gleamed slightly when he tilted down, the metal rectangle being stitched onto a brown headband instead of the usual blue, with long buckles hanging from each of his temples and going past his shoulders.

Neji was her cousin through their fathers, his father Hizashi, who had passed away when she was too young to remember what had truly happened, being her father’s younger twin. He was Hinata's senior by only a year. He had graduated from the Academy and became a Genin during the previous year, yet he looked much older than the average 13 year old that he should be. It could be because of how hardened his face looked compared to a lot of kids around their age, making his face look sharper than it actually was. He balanced it out with his long brown hair, that flowed up till his waist as it would traditionally be grown by the men of the family, held by the end with a hairtie. 

Hinata was often time envious of Neji. He was considered what a Hyuuga should be, disciplined and stoic, and efficient when it came to mastering the basic forms of their family’s fighting style, the Gentle Fist. She wished she had not only his natural gift of picking up skills with ease, but also his confidence and surety with every calculated strike he made- it would definitely make her life easier if she were that way.

That, and she wished she had his looks as well. She had heard the long running comments made by the women of the family; “ Hiashi’s eldest is cute and all, but Hizashi’s child is the prettiest out of all the cousins”  and “I wish my daughter looked like Hizashi’s child”.  

And most of the times, Hinata agreed with them.

“I’m sorry!” Hinata quickly exclaimed, feeling nervous by how his white pupils seemed to be looking into her soul. “Are you alright?”

She could see that he was trying not to show his scowl at her, but was proving to have difficulties when she saw the corners of his mouth twitch downwards, lines evident on his pale skin.The dread seeped in deeper, and she could feel her shoulders curl inwards, trying to make herself small under his gaze.

Neji never smiled at her. 

He always frowned.

Even when Hinata was younger and tried to talk and play with him, Neji never smiled at her. He only forced out a reply here and there, and that’s only if her father was around.

“Lady Hinata,” Neji replied courtly, his tone much cooler than before, but he still glowered at her. “Please watch your step. You can hurt yourself by not being careful.”

“O-oh,” Hinata muttered as she glanced away, his piercing eyes making her nervous. “Okay. But are you-”

Before she could finish her sentence, Neji immediately walked past her with a quick step, turning the corner she came from without a single word, leaving Hinata alone. 

“...hurt,” she finished in a whisper, the dread now turning into hurt at being dismissed this way. 

She really did try her hardest to get to know Neji but to no avail. The young boy never seemed to want to talk to her, never mind be around her. If he was, it was only because Hinata couldn’t be left alone and needed someone from the Branch House to watch over her; and usually, Neji would be the prime candidate, handpicked by Hiashj, being the closest to her age compared to the other clansmen. It has always been this way, their relationship has always been rocky, but Hinata never understood why Neji always refrained from talking to them. 

Were they not cousins before anything else? Was he not supposed to her older brother, the one she should seek guidance from?

What had she done to Neji, except be born into the Main House? 

But at the same time, if she were him, would she not resent her as well?

Hinata didn’t have time to ruminate over what had just happened, and tried to push it down to the back of her mind, as she often does. She fixed the straps of her bag so it fit snug on her shoulder and continued to walk down the halls at a slower pace.

She got to the part of the complex where the faint sounds of pots clanking against one another and fresh fish and eggs sizzling on top a pan could be heard, and Hinata could feel her mouth salivating. She was just in time for a quick breakfast on the spot.

She slid the door with a gentle hand, revealing a pair of woman, both relatively young and wearing a white bandana across their forehead, swiftly shifted between the countertop and the stove. Another woman, middle aged with a few grey hairs, stood near a giant pot on top of a coal fire near the open doorway on the opposite side, letting the steam from the rice cooking waft out to the back court. An elderly woman with grey hair secured in a bun and slightly hunched shoulders shuffled along the countertop, a bento box sitting in front of her as she stuffed sliced vegetables inside.

"Lady Hinata," all three women acknowledged her as they did a bow to the young heiress. Hinata bowed to them, them being her aunties, even if they were apart of the Branch House - she was still raised to be respectful of her elders. 

And even then, Hinata found that it was harder to maintain a separation of houses between the women of the Hyuuga clan- regardless of the house they belong to, and regardless of whether they are of a lower branch, it seems that often when the women and girls are together without the demeaning eye of men, there is not as big of a drift between them, save for maintaining standard titles protocols. 

It didn't help that often times, marriage between the Main House and the extended Branch House. After all, her own grandmother, her father's mother, was from the Branch House, further along the line, and married her grandfather of the Main House. These marriages blurred the lines of formality at times.

Though, what the women lacked in standard house tensions tends to take the form of more personal grudges towards certain family members, from meager things like forgetting to return the favour to downright gossiping about an aloof relative over tea.

Ah, the benefits of having a large family.

While Hinata would try to avoid having a conversation with relatives (mostly because it causes her an existential crisis with their incessant questions and because she already had enough whispers about her), these three aunties were the ones she was most comfortable with. They were often the ones in the kitchen, the ones making the meals during the day for the entire clan; diplomacy was the least of their concern when they had to make copious amounts of food.

"Good morning, Aunties," Hinata replied in a soft tone, smiling as she stepped towards the elderly lady, to look at the contents of the bento box. She could feel her stomach churn at the amount of rice that was on the exposed layer, and that was just one of the two. "Grandmother, you know I can't eat that much food..."

"Nonsense," her grandmother said without looking at Hinata, her frail little body shaking as her hands closed the lid of the bento box. She started to fold the cloth, a baby blue cloth, around the box in a slow manner, the slight twitching of her hand with each tug worrying Hinata, but she didn't stop the woman from doing it. "You need all the energy you can get to become stronger. How would you bring honour to the Hyuuga name if you do not become a strong heir like your father, and his father before?"

Maybe I don't want to be the heir , Hinata wanted to say, but just smiled shyly, eyebrows pulling in. "I can be strong without eating a meal for two."

“Mother Homura," one of her aunt's with the white bandana started from the stove. "Lady Hinata does not need to eat more than she needs to. They won't put her on any taxing missions right away."

"Aunt Kayake's right, Grandmother," Hinata nodded along. "I'm just doing a test-"

"If it's the same type of testing they did with Hiashi, then you most definitely need more than this," Homura replied, her eyebrows, fine and grey, raising as she tried to turn her body to put the bento box back onto the table.

"N-no, it's alright!" Hinata took the box with both hands before Homura could set it down. She started to guide Homura towards a rocking chair in the corner of the kitchen, where a tea set has already been placed on top of a table nearby. "This is enough! Thank you."

"Have they already assigned your team?" the woman stirring the pot of rice, her Aunt Suzume, distantly related to Hinata as is Kayake, started, drawing Hinata’s attention towards her after she allowed Homura to take a seat.

"Yes, we were assigned to them yesterday," Hinata said, unraveling her grandmother's hands to hold onto the bento box in the blue cloth. "I have been placed on a team with Kiba Inuzuka and Shino Aburame."

"An Inuzuka?" The other woman with the bandana, Kayake's younger sister and Hinata's Aunt Mitsu, giggled. She continued to slice open the shrimps from their shells on a cutting board, placing them in a separate bowl. Mitsu leaned forward slightly towards the other three woman, keeping her voice low so that only Homura, with her age causing her poor hearing, could not hear.“The Inuzuka men are quite rugged, don’t you think?”

“Mitsu, we do not care for your love affairs,” Kayake waved her sister’s comment off, returning her attention to the stove, but Suzume’s face contorted in a frantic frown.

“Mitsu! Do not plant such ideas in Lady Hinata’s mind!” Suzume scolded her with a hiss, lifting the rice paddle from the pot, waving it slightly as if she were about to hit Mitsu with it. Hinata could feel her neck start to flush slightly as it started to reach her cheeks at her implications. “She is still a child!”

“Tell me, Hinata,” Mitsu ignored them and ushered Hinata to come closer. The young heiress gravitated towards them. “What are your teammates like?”

“They’re…” Hinata started, hesitating slightly about the words she could use. How  were  her teammates like?

She was apprehensive of being placed on Team 8, and she was sure Shino and Kiba were too. She saw how Kiba’s friends, the two boys and the girl he always sat next to, snickered and whispered amongst themselves when they heard Hinata and Shino's name, and something about them being 'weirdos'.

Hinata wasn't surprised by their words. She knows that, compared to the rest of her classmates, she was off. Painfully shy and quieter than a mouse, Hinata was a stark contrast to what the usual kid her age was like. Her mannerisms, her voice, hell, even her looks, made her a wallflower, a pale white wallpaper that people know is there, but never bothered to be looked at. Only her blood made her truly visible. The only times that people willingly engaged with her is when her family's name is mentioned during a lecture, in which all the kids would turn over to wherever she was sitting to look at her, to see her reaction.

Most of the time, she would look away.

She didn't like looking at people. She didn't like making eye contact.

She felt it was too heavy, too intimate, too much for her soul to handle. She feels like people try to analyze too much of what she says, trying to reach into her soul, trying to unlock the pandora box that is her emotions.

And she didn't like that.

That's why she liked Shino a lot. She knew they would get along well, he was equally as quiet as her, though he was by no means shy. If yesterday's team meeting probed anything, it was that Shino Aburame was vocal, raising himself as an equal to whoever he spoke to. But he respected their space, respected Hinata's space, not looking at her unless she initiated (though, it could be because his glasses made it hard for her to see his irises, making her feel at ease).

Kiba on the other hand, she wasn't sure what to say. He was on the opposite spectrum to her, being outgoing and rowdy with his ways, and the confidence he exudated made Hinata envious. She didn't mind loud people- she found them fascinating and admirable. 

But he was also subtly witty, something that she didn't think she would describe the Inuzuka as. Usually he is vocal about how he feels, calling someone out on their nonsense without a second thought, but yesterday showed her that there was more to him than meets the eye. 

She had to admit thought; while envious of Kiba's personality, she was incredibly intimidated by him. It's not as if she didn't see his bad side, when he would dive head first into a fight against another kid if they talked smack about him to his face, his fists brimming purple with bruises and face speckled with blood. And he always came out victorious with a grin on his face, and Iruka-sensei fuming as he had to drag him off of the poor kid who tried to get a rise out of him, only to be crying on the ground with a bloody nose.

Just remembering it sent chills down her spine.

She definitely did not want to get on his bad side.

"They're nice," she said, fidgeting with the bento box as she glanced away, the way Mitsu looked at her with anticipation making her nervous. "A-and, they're very interesting."

"Interesting in what way?"

"U-uh-"

"Mitsu, you'll get in trouble if Lord Hiashi hears what you insinuate," Kayake warned her sister with a weary look towards Homura, but the old woman barely heeded their words, enjoying a cup of tea as she swayed slightly in the rocking chair.

Mitsu giggled at her words and straightening herself, before continued slicing the shrimp's shell in her hand. "Can't I ask the young heiress about these things? It's not like they won't ask her about it later."

Hinata could feel herself blush at her aunt's notion.

There was someone that she admired in her life...but she was not going to disclose that to them, not until the entirety of hell freezes over.

"Do that when it is time to do so," Suzume scoffed. "Knowing Lord Hiashi, however, it would be a long process."

I hope it doesn't happen anytime soon,  Hinata thought, biting the bottom of her lips slightly. Talks of marriage and whatnot were not her main concern- perhaps one day, but right now, she had more things to worry about than her supposed betrothal.

"Isn't it interesting though," Kayake suddenly started after a pause, turning back to look at towards the two other women and Hinata. "That they always put an Aburame, an Inuzuka, and a Hyuuga on the same team whenever the graduating class had all three?"

To this, Hinata's eyebrows raised slightly. Her words were too precise not to ignore. "A-always? Who was apart of the last of this group formation?"

All three women looked at one another when Hinata asked her question, their faces suddenly become weary, and Hinata could feel the room fall still all of the sudden. She glanced between them, not knowing what to do, and suddenly felt like becoming very small to hide herself, not knowing what had warranted this tenseness.

"Lord Hiashi hasn't told you yet?" Suzume asked in a suddenly low tone, hushed as if she didn't want anyone else to hear. When Hinata nodded, she glanced around for a second, her eyes flitting cautiously towards the door, before landing back on Hinata. "Well...it doesn't hurt to know but...the last time they had a Aburame-Inuzuka-Hyuuga team was with-"

They suddenly heard the tatami door wiggle a bit and abruptly stopped talking, waiting for the person to reveal themselves.

“Lord Hiashi,” all the women in the kitchen said in unison as they bowed, and Hinata turned around towards the tatami door, a tall man in a deep blue yukata and a darker grey jacket standing between the frame. 

Her father had his usual stoic face, his eyebrows naturally arched to look like he was frowning most of the times and his mouth in a straight line. He gave an acknowledged bow to Hinata’s grandmother, his mother, before looking over to Hinata.

“G-good morning, Father,” Hinata quickly whispered with a slight bow of her head, gripping the sides of her lunch box. Hiashi stared at Hinata for a moment, as if analyzing what he saw, trying to pick out any sort of flaw in how she appeared.

“Today is your final test, is it not?” Hiashi asked in an even tone, never breaking eye contact from Hinata, who glanced away towards the lines of the floorboard. “Why are you still here? And look at me when I speak to you.”

“Yes!” she squeaked at how much sharper his tone became, and straightened her gaze. “I just had more time left so...so I thought I could take my time today.”

Hiashi narrowed his eyes.

“ Heedfulness is the path to the Deathless. Heedlessness is the path to death. The heedful do not die. The heedless are as if already dead* .” Hiashi quoted the proverb from ancient scriptures without missing a beat, and Hinata could see the frown lines deepening on his tanned face. “If you were going to mindlessly be on the compound this whole time, then you could have been practicing your forms. Your sister has already mastered all of the basic forms; you have yet to perform them efficiently.”

“I-I,” Hinata started, now feeling her neck burning in embarrassment of being put on the spot in this way, but she couldn’t finish her sentence, feeling the heat rising to her face.

“Mother,” Hiashi turned his attention towards her grandmother, who had simply been keeping her mouth closed as Hiashi gave Hinata the third degree. “Hinata is grown and she can make her own meals. You’re spoiling her by making her lunch.”

“Hiashi,” Homura said with a slight hum to her voice, soft and slow, as she started to sway lightly on the chair. "If you believe this to be true, then you should make your own tempura from now on, do you not think so?"

To this, Hiashi eyes slightly widened in hesitation for only a split second, but he quickly fixed himself back to neutrality. Hinata had to stifle her laugh, and she looked down to hide the amused smile she couldn't suppress.

Leave it to Homura to be as eloquently blunt as her son.

"That is not the same," Hiashi replied coolly. "The food you make is for the entire family."

"Tempura is usually reserved for dinners," Homura said as equally calm. "But you still insist on eating it for breakfast as well. You should eat better; you're a grown man."

Hinata could see her father's jaws clenching, muscle along his jawline flexing- being told off by one's mother in front of an audience was not on the top of every clan leader's to do lists.

"Hinata." His eyes returned to her, and she quickly kept her lips in a line. "It is best if you left for your test. You don't want to keep your team waiting for you."

I didn't even eat breakfast,  Hinata thought, but refused to say this outloud. She didn't want to be scolded anymore than she needed to be. "Yes."

“Do not be a burden to your teammate,” Hiashi said courtly, before stepping aside to let Hinata walk through the open doorway. 

Hinata gritted her teeth, feeling her throat suddenly lodged with emotion, but she kept it to herself. She nodded, and quickly exited the kitchen, giving a quick bow to her grandmother before she made her way towards the courtyard to leave the compound.

I won’t burden anyone,  Hinata thought as she inhaled and exhaled slowly, trying her best to maintain her confidence, but she could already feel the tips of her eyes started to sting with tears.  I promise, I won’t burden anyone.

----

When Hinata made it to the top of the Hokage Rock, she was surprised to see that Shino was the only one there, waiting underneath a tree. She glanced up to the sky, the morning sun bearing white in the east slightly above the horizon. It was nearly time for their test, she could tell, but where could their sensei and Kiba be?

She wasn't sure where Shino was looking at, his dark frames shading his eyes from anyone to see, but from the way his face tilted down, she could tell she was looking at the ground with intent. 

Should I call out to him?  She thought, ready to raise her hand to wave towards him, but hesitated slightly.  No, he looks busy...I don't want to disturb him. But, then again, I should ask him where everyone else is...

Hinata continued this debate on whether she should call out to Shino or walk up to him as she crossed clearing, but she wasn't given the opportunity to think it through. All of the sudden, she heard a high pitched bark becoming louder from the trail she just walked on, and a voice yelling, "Akamaru! Wait up buddy!"

She knew who it was immediately, and spun on her heels to look behind her. Unfortunately, she was not prepared for the small flash of white coming towards her at full speed, already a metre away from her.

Hinata didn't have time to react, and she wasn't sure whether she could or not- by the time she blinked, the flash of white had jumped up towards her and hit her chest, pushing her backwards and making her land on her behind, before laying flat on her back.

Talk about a double whammy. This is the second time she was sent flying onto her back. Her tailbone was starting to hurt a bit. It didn't help that she had her backpack on during the fall, and had placed her bento box inside, making the impact harder against her lower back when she fell, the side of the bento box digging into her sharply.

Hinata blacked out for a few seconds, eyes closed in shock and her ears momentarily blanking. When she slowly opened her eyes, she was greeted by a little brown nose against hers and the sound of slight panting.

Her eyes started to take in everything beyond the nose, seeing it attached to a white puppy with long, floppy ears and small, brown eyes that looked at her with excitement. The puppy barked at her once, and she could feel a  thump thump thump  on her abdomen, his tail wagging happily.

"H-hello...Akamaru," Hinata managed to say in a soft voice, remembering the puppy's name from how Kiba had introduced him as yesterday. This only made Akamaru even more excited because he barked a few times and his tail wagged faster, before he gave Hinata's cheek a little lick.

Hinata could feel her heart soar at this little gesture by the puppy. Is this what feeling wanted is like?

"Akamaru!" Kiba's voice exclaimed as he ran up towards Hinata, who was still being licked by the puppy. "Get off of her! Sit!"

Akamaru did as he was told with a slight whine, and hopped off of Hinata's chest, sitting down beside her as he looked expectantly at Kiba. Hinata managed to prop herself up with her elbows, lifting her back up into a sitting position. She glanced up to see Kiba standing near her feet, both hands on his hips as he gave Akamaru a disapproving look.

Hinata could feel her heart start beating fast while looking at her now teammate; he was much more intimidating from where she was sitting, narrow eyes shifting around with a frown on his face. Kiba had always scared her slightly, with his red markings making him look like a warrior on his way to a battleground, and the way his eyebrows, sharp and fierce, made his narrow eyes look even more piercing. She was half ready to apologize, but then she saw his frown disappear as he softened his look, now looking at Hinata with...was it concern?

"Sorry about that," Kiba said, almost in a mumble, and Hinata could see that his cheeks flushed pink suddenly, as if embarrassed. "I swear, he's usually better behaved than this."

"It's okay," Hinata replied softly, and Akamaru barked at Hinata, taking a step closer.

 "What d'ya think you were doing, Akamaru?" Kiba looked at Akamaru with a stern look, his arms crossing over, eyebrows pulled in. The puppy stopped in his tracks and looked up to his owner, his dog wagging in the air.

"Arf! Arf!"

"So what? You could've hurt Hinata!"

"Arf! Arf, arf, arf!"

"I don't want to hear it," Kiba huffed. "Now sit and think about what you did! You're not getting any treats until you obey!"

Akamaru let out a whining sound, his happy demeanor dropping as his tail stopped wagging, his eyes looking back at Kiba big and glistening in woe. When Kiba raised an eyebrow at Akamaru, waiting for the puppy to continue, Akamaru stopped his attempt at persuading Kiba to let him be and he laid down on his stomach sadly, a whine emitting from his throat.

"...you need a hand?" Kiba asked after a moment when Akamaru settled down. 

Hinata, meanwhile, was preoccupied staring between him and Akamaru in awe, watching them have a conversation she couldn't understand, only going by Kiba's words. What kind of technique helped you communicate with animals? She knew about shinobi being able to summon animals for their services, forming a blood pact between the master and the animal, but she often heard of summoning animals being able to speak in their tongue.

When she noticed Kiba's hand reaching out towards her, she looked at him for a split second, feeling less intimidated by her new teammate. Should she accept his aid?

I won't be a burden,  she reminded herself, while shaking her head lightly.  I won't be coddled.

"N-no," she said quickly, her inflection making her voice crack, and she stood up, brushing her behind while doing so. She added in a much more normal rhythm, "Thank you, t-though."

"Hinata, are you hurt?" a low, monotone voice suddenly said behind her. She nearly jumped by how close the voice, low and soft, was, but she stopped herself from doing so upon recognition, and turned around towards the source.

"I-I'm not," Hinata said with a slight smile, tilting her head up to look at Shino, him being taller than she, even with her sandals. She placed her arms slightly in front of her, refraining from showing any signs of pain from her back. "I'm fine."

Shino stood by with his hands in his coat pocket, half his face still being hidden the collar, not saying anything for a moment. Hinata couldn't tell where he was looking, but from the way his arched eyebrows pulled in slightly, she assumed she was looking at Kiba. He softened his face again quickly, as if realising that they were staring at him.

"Did something break in your bag?" Shino asked smoothly, without moving whatsoever. He paused again for a split second, before continuing, "Because I heard a crack when you fell."

"Oh!" Hinata exclaimed in a light voice, swinging her bag around in front of her quickly, remembering her poor bento box that she had inside. She opened her bag and peered inside and…

"Oh no," Hinata moaned as she looked at what was supposed to be her lunch.  The rice, vegetables, everything was outside of the bento box, scattered everywhere and she could see the box has a slight fissure along the side, likely due to her landing. 

"My l-lunch," Hinata mumbled, and she could feel her stomach churn at the sight of food being spoiled. She really should have eaten something before leaving.

Shino leaned over slightly, head barely moving downwards but Hinata could tell he was looking into her bag. He stood there motionless for a moment, before tilting his head slightly on the side, looking beyond Hinata. 

"Can't you keep your dog on a leash?" Shino said suddenly, his voice low and a bit forceful, inflecting slightly at the end as if unsure how to end the sentence.

Hinata could feel a shift in the atmosphere amongst them at Shino's words, and she stared at him wide eyes before looking over at Kiba. Kiba stared at him for a split second, eyes blinking at Shino, before his eyebrows pulled in quickly, jaw clenching, when their teammate's words were finally processed in their minds.

"What did you say?"

"I said 'can't you keep your dog on a leash'," Shino repeated in an equal tone. The atmosphere was tense as they stared at each other, and Hinata took a slight step back, not wanting to be caught in between, fidgeting with her fingers slightly.

"His name is  Akamaru,  " Kiba replied sharply, his words punctuated with a slightly louder tone, and Hinata could see the flame of anger spark in his eyes as he glared at Shino. "And  Akamaru  isn't some  pet  I can put on a leash. Like how  you  don't put your bugs in a  container ."

"We're talking about Akamaru, not my insects," Shino replied stiffly. "Maybe you should train him to listen to you more before using him on our mission. Because it looks like he doesn't even obey simple commands."

"Arf!" Akamaru barked lightly, looking between the two of them, but Kiba ignored him.

"She said she was fine, didn't she? It wasn't like he was attacking her- and besides, you don't need to tell me what I should do with  my ninken!"

They had an important test that would determine whether they could become Shinobi, why were they having an argument at this very moment?

Hinata wasn't sure what to do with herself at that moment, finding herself hesitating to even look at either of the boys, fearing they might explode into an altercation if she dared to see. Should she stop them from arguing? How would she even stop them? What if they start getting into a fight? Would she be able to stop them? No way.

She was too weak, too cowardly, no way would she be able to stop a fight. 

"U-uh, guys," Hinata started, but her voice barely came out, a light airy tone that was easily overpowered by Kiba's voice.

"What's your problem with me, huh?" Kiba started, suddenly taking a step forward passing Hinata to stand directly in front of Shino, his fists clenching. "If you got something you want to say about me, then say it to my face!"

"I have nothing to say to you," Shino replied. "I was talking about your dog."

"If you have a problem with  Akamaru  , then you have a problem with  me ," Kiba said, his voice filled with venom as he looked up to Shino, who didn't flinch in the slightest. "Yesterday you had a lot to say- why are you acting all mute now?"

They stood there for a moment, neither of them moving. Akamaru let out a slight whine, and shuffled closer to Hinata's leg, as if seeking some sort of comfort, but she couldn’t move. The pressure in the atmosphere is making her head tense up with adrenaline, and Hinata could feel her forehead starting to scrunch up. She couldn’t activate the Byakugan, not now, no, and she tried to focus by glancing between them, waiting for someone to say something. 

Shino was the first to break the silence.

"If you don't know how to use him, then you shouldn't have brought him today," Shino said slowly and dully, as if talking to a child who didn't understand what he did wrong. "It would only hold us back. This test is important and we can't jeopardize our chances."

Kiba gritted his teeth, and Hinata could see his fists started to clench. 

Oh no. 

Was he going to swing at him? She shifted her legs slightly apart, ready to intervene, but she could barely move otherwise.

Before Kiba could move, the wind started to pick up pace around them, swirling in front of the trio and forcing them to plant their feet on the ground and concentrate on not being blown away. Hinata could see the leaves from the trees nearby creating a sparse tornado as a sudden figure appeared in the middle of the vortex.

“K-Kurenai-sensei,” Hinata mumbled as she watched with wide eyes as the leaves settled around the figure, revealing their long black hair and deep red outfit.

"Looks like everyone came here on time,” Kurenai looked between them with a nonchalant smile. “I was going to give you guys some time together, but it looks like something was happening. Is everything alright?”

Kiba unclenched his fists and placed them in his hoodie pockets, balling them up inside. He gave a dejected, “Yeah, everything’s fine.”

She glanced over to Shino, who didn’t say anything and was looking away from her, before her eyes landed on Hinata. Hinata felt flustered and started to glance away, her nerves getting the best of her as red eyes scanned over her, waiting to see if she had anything to say. 

"Y-yes," Hinata said, still glancing away. "All fine."

"Alright then," Kurenai replied after giving them another questionable look, and she reached into her dress pocket and pulled out what appeared to be a small clock. "Since everyone is here, we can get started with the test. Gather around."

All three of them obeyed and followed Kurenai as she walked towards a wooden picnic table underneath a tree nearby. After leaving their bags on the table, they formed a semi circle around Kurenai, with Hinata standing between Kiba and Shino as Akamaru rejoined his master by his side with a few little bounds off his small paws. It took a good amount of self-restraint for Hinata to not look at the puppy and coo at how cute he looked as he sat down, his tail waving around slowly as he waited for Kurenai to speak.

"Since this is my first time having a Genin team, I decided that this test would be much easier that I had originally planned,” Kurenai started, her gaze resting on them as she spoke. “Your test will be…” 

There was a fraction of pause in her sentence, and Hinata could feel the anticipation in the air as they hung over her every word. What was the test going to be? Are they going to have to prove their worth by winning a match? Would have to fight each other? 

Or worse; would they have to win a fight against Kurenai? 

Hinata gripped a string of her hoodie, her hand already placed over her chest while she was standing and listening to Kurenai talk, and she swallowed. 

“A little game of hide and seek tag," Kurenai said, and Hinata could have sworn there was a flash of amusement on her face. "With a little added twist of capture the flag. Sounds fun, right?"

Hinata glanced over to her teammates, and she could see Kiba shift his eyes around to them as well, apprehensive and wary about her intentions.

"You've played those games before, haven't you?" Kurenai asked with a slight quirk of her fine brow, looking between them as they stared silently back, uncertainty in the atmosphere.

"We have," Shino responded for the group. "As children, though. "

Hinata noticed the slight hesitation in Kurenai at his words, her lips pursing slightly, but it left as quickly as it came. She smiled instead, and continued in a much softer voice, "Then you should already know the rules. But there are a few things I added and changed for this test."

She held a hand up and placed a finger onto the metal plate of her red headband, right beside the Konoha symbol edged deep. She tapped it with the tip of her deep red nails. 

"This headband right here is the flag,” she said in the same tone. “The goal of this test is to get this headband off of my forehead."

Hinata felt an overwhelming sense of anxiety and worry building up in her stomach at Kurenai's words, and her eyebrows refused to relax from the frown. This doesn't sound like a hard task, but considering that this is a Jonin they were facing, only a rank below the Hokage, makes this little task...well...much more difficult than anything they had ever gone through before.

From her ranking, and from what Hinata remembered from the previous day, she knew Kurenai's strongest skill was in the realm of Genjutsu. Genjutsu in itself was such a vast field, limited only by the users' own unbrittled imagination. It is the art of illusion, after all, preying on the senses of your opponents by affecting the specific parts of the brain in order to make them believe that the illusion are true, making them vulnerable to experience things that are not happening in the physical world. Unlike Ninjutsu, though, it was much harder to control, with the user having to be able to control their chakra as well as being able to come up with a way to reach the opponents senses, those being five more extra things to worry about, unlike the other ninja arts. 

The expanse of Genjutsu was not taught during their Academy years, instead focusing on Ninjutsu and Taijutsu to prepare them as shinobi. The only Genjutsu they had to learn was the Clone Illusion Jutsu, but even that D-level jutsu was incredibly hard to master, taking many a year to make at least one competent clone illusion. 

Even Iruka rarely employed that technique during the mock battles he would have with another teacher, opting for the easier Ninjustu,  Clone Jutsu , telling them that clones are better used to distract the enemy and less taxing for them to control.

"Okay," Kiba replied slowly, eyebrows furrowing slightly. "What's the hide and seek part for?"

“That’s the fun part," Kurenai replied. “Like a usual game of hide and seek, I'll hide around the Village with the flag, and you three would have to find me in order to capture the flag. I’ve decided to make it easier, though, since this is the first time I’m doing this test. The only places I’ll hide is on the Hokage Rock or the training grounds. Nowhere else in the Village."

A game of capture the flag that required them to find the flag in a pretty expanded area ...

This was definitely not an easy task, but it was definitely not a hard one. They’ve played these kind of games in the Academy, in the form of a treasure hunt in the middle of one of their training grounds in order to utilize their survival skills for a few hours, but it was limited to a certain area and one target. That, and they usually had a much more obvious trail to lead them on the right path. 

It was clear to Hinata as why Kurenai set up the test in the way she did. She must have read their datasheets when they were first assigned to her: with Kiba hailing from the Inuzuka clan and having a keen sense of smell, and Hinata having the Byakugan that allowed her heightened sight, this test was to see how they would do in tracking a target. Hinata wasn’t sure exactly how Shino fit into the team, but she knew he was extremely perceptive, more so than she was, even without her clan’s abilities.

Hinata felt like she should have an advantage for this task, with her Byakugan and all, but she still had an immature grasp of the skill. It was taxing to control, and took up a good amount of her strength to maintain; even with all those years of training, she couldn’t understand how to control it efficiently.

And that’s what worries her the most.

She should have an advantage, but this advantage was easily be a disadvantage.

"That's it?" Kiba said, a smirk growing on his face. "That makes this too easy!"

"There’s three extra rules, though,” Kurenai added as she smiled at Kiba's enthusiasm, as she held up the clock. “The first one is the time limit. I’m only giving you exactly five hours from when we start to find me. I’ll leave the timer here.”

“Would that be wise?’ Shino suddenly asked. Hinata looked at him questionably, as did everyone else, and it took him a minute to continue his though. “It’s possible that one of us could change the clock, and give us the advantage of having extra time."

“Good point Shino, but this is mostly for you three,” Kurenai said. “I don’t need a clock to tell time. Besides, if one of you touch this clock, it would self implode. You could try it yourselves if you don’t believe me though.”

Hinata gulped as she stared at the clock in her hand as it sat on the table. No way is she going anywhere near that.

“This leads me to the second rule. If none of you get the headband before the designated five hours, then you  all  will fail the test and be sent back to the Academy.”

That made sense. This was like a final exam, it made sense for her to be this strict on them.

"The last thing is the most crucial part, so listen carefully," Kurenai continued. "The reason why the Academy decided to put you in a team because each of you possessed the abilities to become impeccable trackers.”

"But after meeting all of you yesterday, I gave it some thought," she said slowly. "I figured that there's no point in having all three of you become Genin when we could use the person with the  best  tracking skills so far. Therefore, the first person to find me and capture the flag will become a Genin. The other two will return to the Academy."

“Wha-” Hinata muttered in shock, taken aback by her words, her fist clenching tighter on her chest.

"Are you even allowed to do that?" Kiba asked. "There must have been a reason to put us all together like this!"

"Yes, there must have been. But at the end of the day,  I'm  the one who has to teach and guide you to becoming a remarkable shinobi during your time as a Genin," Kurenai emphasized. "The Academy doesn't have control over who passes here on out- but I do. And I have decided that whoever is the most capable gets to be Genin."

That’s not fair,  Hinata wanted to say, but she held her tongue, realizing the stupidity in her thought. The ninja world is never fair to begin with; so why would this testing be?

"Remember you only have 5 hours," Kurenai said as she hit the button on the clock. The clock hand started to tick, and Hinata instinctively took a shuriken from the blue holster around her leg, readying herself. “Do you have any more questions?’

"Do we need to give you time to hide or-" Kiba started, his question tapering off as he took a stance, readying himself for Kurenai to move. Hinata’s eyes never left her sensei, who simply smiled at them.

"There's no need," she said as the wind suddenly picked up pace around her, the grass around her twirling at a rapid pace. "The real me is hiding already. This…"

Hinata’s eyes widened as Kurenai’s legs started to blend into the background, fading away and being replaced by pink petals. Her body morphed against the gradience, rising up to her body as more petals fell, as she watched in amusement with how taken aback they were.

"Was all a genjutsu."

Her face faded as an echo in their minds, and the wind stood still as the last petal from the top of her head fell to the ground on top of the rest. The three of them stood still, none of them knowing what to do for a split second. 

Shino was the first to move, taking a step forward towards the stacks of flower petals.

“Hey, wait,” Kiba started as Shino squatted down, holding one of the petals between his thumb and index finger, carefully surveying. “What are you doing?”

“Checking if this is real or not,” Shino said. “It could be useful to track her down.”

“Whoa, don’t hog the whole thing to yourself!” Kiba exclaimed as he ran towards Shino, Akamaru barking as he ran behind Kiba. 

Hinata snapped out of her faze and found control over her feet, trailing behind Shino, unsure of what to do.

“You got her scent?” Kiba asked Akamaru, who let out a bark. Hinata could see Kiba’s nose move a bit as he inhaled sharply, moving his head around until he set towards east to where they were standing facing the other side of Konoha. “Alright. We got this. Let’s go Akamaru!”

“Hold on,” Shino said suddenly, making Kiba halt in his spot, and turn around quickly. 

“There’s no ‘hold on’,” Kiba said, crossing his arms as he frowned. “This is a test and only one of us can pass.”

“That’s why I said hold on,” Shino continued. “There’s something weird about it.”

“And?” The Inuzuka asked sharply, his patience running thinner by the second. “What about it.”

“Listen,” Shino replied equally as fast. “It’s weird because her reasoning for only passing one of us is incredibly vague. Don’t you find it strange that they would go through the trouble of putting us in specific teams only for one of us to pass?”

Kiba grimaced, staring at Shino for moment, as if conflicted with his words. He then replied, slight hesitancy in his voice,“It...It doesn’t matter who I’m with. Even if I weren’t with you guys, I’m pretty sure the rules would be the same.”

Hinata felt a slight pang in her chest when he said those words, the bitterness seeping through like tea through a filter. She had to grit her teeth to refrain from being too hurt.

 “Besides, she said it herself,” he continued as he started to turn his back towards them. “She’s in charge of us. There’s nothing stopping her from booting us back to the Academy. And there’s no way I’m going back there.”

“Kiba,” Hinata tried to start, but she couldn’t finish her sentence. She didn’t know what to say. 

An uneasy silence fell over them.

“She’s headed towards Training Ground 1,” Kiba suddenly said in a quiet tone, never turning back to look at them. He tilted his head down, and said “Let’s go, Akamaru.”

With a bark of agreement from the puppy, he sped off at full speed, towards the direction of the training ground he mentioned, the one closest to the Hokage Rock and filled with hills and forest near the wall that encompasses Konoha. 

That’s one of the larger ones , Hinata thought, as she stood there, trying to gather her thoughts. She could see from the corner of her eyes Shino looking at her, not saying anything, as if waiting for her to move. 

Her gut was telling her the same thing that Shino was doubting; the reason for only one of them felt too vague, as if Kurenai wanted them to break that rule. Sure, they all have skills for tracking, but there’s something more to it than that.

But no, that wouldn’t make sense; she was very clear that she only wanted one. Why would she deceive them into believing a fake rule? Was Hinata thinking too hard into this?  

“He’s right,” Hinata said when she made her decision, and she glanced up towards Shino. She looked directly at his glasses, dark enough to cover his eyes under the sun in the atmosphere, and maintained. “Even if we all work together, only one of us can pass.”

“Hinata-” Shino started, but stopped abruptly. He just stared at her in silence for a moment, and Hinata couldn’t tell what he was thinking, or even why she was standing there to begin with.

“I’ll see you there, Shino,” Hinata offered softly, and she started to run off towards the direction, focusing her chakra towards her legs to help them pick up her pace.

I won’t be a burden to myself, Hinata thought, a new sense of determination swelling in her stomach.  I can take care of myself.

Can I?

#home is where my team is #naruto #team 8 #hinata #shino #kiba #naruhina #homeiswheremyteamis

[awwhoneybaby]

Random Things I would like to see in The Sims 4:

Some of this stuff is random things I want and some are things I see that some of the sims community members would like to see.

Zodiac Signs - I definitely want Zodiac signs back in game and for them to actually have an effect on our sims, give them some more personality like I’m begging.

Heterochromia - That just seems cool to me hehe

More Traits/Aspirations - Im so tired of using my same three favorite traits, and the randomizer doesn’t do much. Please give us more traits and aspirations, I feel like the game would be 10x better if we had the funny aspirations like the “Gold Digger” lifetime wish in TS3.

More Get to Work Jobs - Being able to go to work with your sims is so much fun, and it would be wayyy more fun if there were more jobs to actually go work. Like going to an actual Law Office with your sim and filling out paperwork, and being able to go to court! Or with the Teacher job, being able to go lecture a group of students and have office hours for students.

A Get to School Pack - Just like Get to Work but with the kids in your household, now I’m not rlly a family player bc there’s not much of anything to do with the babies, toddlers, and kids. Even with Teens I get bored afterwhile bc they’re just doing the same thing as my Young Adults. Being able to go to school with your sims and have them chose to pay attention or goof off in class like in ts3 university life pack. To be able to do things like go to lunch and skip classes and hangout after school and participate in after school activities!!!

More Pets - Imagine owning a bunny, horse, or a bird. Or even lizards and snakes, we deserved wayyy more than what we got with just cats & dogs and don’t even get me started on the crazy rabit rodent in my first pet stuff.

A Hobbies Pack - Knifty knitting is cute but on god that could’ve been a small part of a HUGE hobbies pack!! I feel like they’ve been making small hobbies themed packs and charging us for them like knifty knitting, bowling night, movie hangout, cool kitchen (cooking/baking), fitness, and the moschino pack (photography) definitely could’ve been apart of a hobbies pack bc that’s all they are, they’re HOBBIES! Like it makes me angry bc all of that could’ve definitely been one big hobbies pack. They still have a chance to make one and include other things like skateboarding, ballet, and all types of sports if they truly wanted too. But we know EA :/// and we know our dear sims team. :/

A Sixam Game Pack - Unfortunately it would require y’all to buy Get to Work but as someone who loves to play with the supernatural sims I would love if it there was a a space themed pack about Sixam and it went into detail about the Aliens and gave them more powers/things to do. Like compared to Vampires and Spellcasters, Aliens are lacking. (I think Mermaids might have it worse tho!)

More Supernatural Stuff - Like I just said the supernaturals in game are lacking in a lots of areas, yeah they’re fun to play but holy shit the sims team could’ve done so much better for those life forms.

In Depth Celebrity Careers - Listen, I would absolutely love it if my sims could START A FUCKING BAND! Like IMAGINE, like being able to start a spunky Jazz band or a crazy Heavy Metal band, or even a boy band. Like I feel like that would be fun to be into depth with that and become and actual superstar. Like if Get Famous just didn’t focus of becoming a famous actor and dedicated their time to the other many careers that could’ve been touched with that pack :(!! Becoming a famous stylist and being able to style sims in a boutique or hair salon!! Or with the famous author, being able to sit and have book signings with your sims!! Like imagine that :((( Or even being able to be the paparazzi and having your sim run around for the latest scoop. Ugh!

An Actual Generations Pack - To be able to make memories with your family, and actually do family activities and not have to worry about if the parenthood responsibilities meter will actually fill or not 😐😑😐 with more interactions and inclusive activites for babies, toddlers, teens, and elders!!!! Also an improvement to family trees and acknowledging things like cousins and great grandparents and being able to have prior family relationships and not just odd friendship bars! My sims have a shit ton of cousins & they don’t even realize it omg I get so upset too bc they’re parents are so close! More FAMILY dynamics for the love of god.

Lastly (I think lol) A Royalty Themed Pack - Now every time I mention a royalty pack eveybody mentions The Sims Medieval like okay whatever that was cute and all but I want a MODERN DAY royal pack with a twist by having rococo themed furniture and themes. I know a lot of base game items have that aesthetic but no I’m talking big time rococo themes babeeyy give us those big old dresses and powder wigs. But not too much, like I said, modern royalty. Have you sims be deemed King or Queen, then bring about Princes and Princess!!! Having things like a bodyguard and a royal advisor along your side and all. It can be a new world with heavy french inspired themes and it can start off with three royal families. An older family with a good known reputation, an older family with a cruel rep, and a newer family! You can marry into these families or even start your own monarchy at start up. Each family rules over certain worlds in game, let’s say you only have base game then one family would rule willow creek, another oasis springs, and other ruling newcrest. And if you have more packs each family rule over certain areas like a real monarchy. People say things like they’ll just be like celebrities and the get famous system but no, that’s not how that works lol. They’re a ROYAL FAMILY like HELLO? Royals should be able to make laws and pass and deny them. Royals should do things like be able to have royal balls and banquets and invite the other royal familes. Depending on how they treat their people should effect the gameplay. If you’re a good monarch? They praise you and your people are happy. A bad and greedy one? They remove you from the throne! Imagine the abundance of crowns and tiaras and more statues to decorate your palace. Also the thought of creating a bigger castle lot, mayb 70 x 70 lot and having in house workers like maids and a personal chef! Also Royal announcements!! Being able to announce the new heir and royal babys and weddings!!! Ugh can you imagine that??? How wonderful. And because you’re royalty you do stand above others and your sims get special privillages like free everything, and having your kids be homeschooled by a governess! Also this could introduce funerals, your sims can be effected by the death of a leader by either being sad or happy depending on how your sim treated their people. Mayb I’m onto something or mayb I’m just obsessed with the though of my sim having status 🗿 either way-

Well that’s my list of random things I want that’s always on my mind omg

#God I am shit posting again #Im just ranting #TS4 #hopefully somebody from the sims team sees omg #The Sims 4 #S4CC #Bella Goth #Don Lothario #Landgraab #Get to Work #Eco Lifestyle #Strangerville #Get Together #Realm of Magic #Black Sims #Simblr #Me

[plunnies-n-shit]

as it was

Bleach -- ShinIchi -- Canon Divergence

Shinji waits because....

Honestly, he doesnt know. 

He had his reasons, surely. Ichigo was young. Shinji had been his teacher, and, even though ichigo had long surpassed him, shinji wanted to make sure that teacher-student dynamic had well and faded. And, ichigo was a hero: if anyone had earned a rest and reprieve, the rest of his human life in peace, it was ichigo. 

It all seems so silly now. So. meaningless. 

Because Kurosaki Ichigo is dead, and no one can find his spirit in any of the three worlds.

(Two years later, a Shiba boy bearing a startling resemblance to the late Shiba Kaien enters the Shin'o Academy)

Byakuya figures this "Shiba Youko" out first, and almost immediately, pretty much just because Byakuya is one of the best damn reiryoku sensors currently in existence. He promises to keep this Shiba Youko's secret, partly because hes the best damn reiryoku sensor in existence and even he couldnt find Ichigo in the Rukongai or avenge Ichigo by killing whatever sent him to the Soul Society in the first place.

(Also because Byakuya almost blew Ichigo's cover the first time Byakuya and Shiba Youko met because byakuya blurted out "isnt Youko a woman's name?" without meaning to. No one noticed but Byakuya was really embarrassed by the momentary lapse of control)

Ichigo's disguise is twofold: 

First is Shiba Youko/Shiba Yōko, Shiba Kūkaku's youngest brother, named after a powerful Shiba elder some generations back (because Kūkaku finally has Ichigo out from under Isshin's thumb and fuck yeah she's gonna go all out with all the Fancy Clan Shit. She gets to rename him, she gets to teach him about their ancestors, she'll fucking sew the Shiba family crest onto every single article of clothing Shiba Yōko owns if he'll let her.). Shiba Yōko is cheerful and mild-mannered and extremely talented even if he never seems to unseal his Zanpakutō/can't seem to unseal his Zanpakutō.

The second layer: if people get past the cheerful, mild-mannered (if a bit of a trickster), white-and-black-haired (thank you, Zangetsu) Shiba Yōko, Kūkaku has filled Yōko's head with every damn story about Kaien that she remembers, which is all of them. Shiba Yōko is a fragment of Kaien's soul, freed after Rukia killed aaroniero and reincarnating strangely because if it. His memories are fragmented, but he clearly remembers some of his past life, it's got to be Kaien right? Even if he can't remember how he died either time, that's traumatic and Shiba Yōko is only a boy after all.

(Jūshirō falls for that second disguise so hard. And it definitely helps that Ichigo... kinda really wants that father-figure in his life. Even though Ichigo feels guilty for lying, Jūshirō is kind and caring and gives direction without expectation and he never, ever swings at Ichigo outside of the training fields, and Ichigo loves him)

The worst part is that Shinji falls for it.

He falls for the façade of Shiba Yōko, prodigy who graduates in a year and immediately gets an offer for the Sixth Division Third Seat.

(Alternatively, i could also place Ichigo in the Fourth.

Like, a combination of growing up with Isshin in the clinic and two years+one year in the academy learning control and kaidō

Shinji will never suspect this cute, kind, cheerful, mild-mannered shinigami who follows Unohana around kinda like a lost puppy(edited)

A cute, kind, cheerful, mild-mannered shinigami who is maybe taking after Unohana more than is advisable, if the way he can get Eleventh Division shinigami to stay put with just a smile

And of course Unohana is going to keep Yōko's secret)

Because on one hand she doesn't actually care, and on the other hand, she wants to keep Ichigo close and see him grow because she really wants to fight him someday

Shiba Yōko, who is young and kind. Who helps little old ladies across the street. Who pokes and prods until Byakuya, who'd withdrawn again after Ichigo's death, until Byakuya starts to joke and even laugh again. Shiba Yōko, who despite not having unsealed his Zanpakutō and clearly not being a front-line fighter is willing to put himself between his team and an enemy and who never, ever leaves anyone behind.

And then

Kaien

Kaien was a good kid in Shinji's eyes. Too good, maybe. A little naive, a little too trusting, and who died way too young.

Kaien, who talks about sneaking Kūkaku in to get dango at the stand in front of the Eighth. Kaien, who talks about how he loved his wife, even if he barely has any memories of her left. Kaien, kind, kind Kaien, who admits that the last memory he has was trying to find incriminating evidence tying Aizen to the Hollification Incident.

(There will be one scene where they kiss and it's sweet and gentle and everything Shinji imagined his first kiss with Ichigo would be. And he draws back and strokes his thumb across Yōko's cheek and says, "You're gonna make someone very, very happy someday."

And then Shinji walks away.

And Yōko/Ichigo is like, "Holy shit, this man is so fucking dumb"

"........"

"I cant believe I have to fuck him.")

I know it's going to take place in a kind of. Extended period. between when Ichigo was supposed to fight the Fullbringers and TYBW?

Shinji finds out on the battlefield, takes two seconds to reconcile all the shit that Ichigo has pulled, and then immediately grabs another Captain so Shinji and Ichigo can get battlefield-married

the last time he waited Ichigo ended up dead and out of Shinji's reach and not this time damnit

(Ichigo takes that looks-like-a-killing blow from Yhwach, and Shinji tells himself that he's just happy they had time, together, however short)

(and then)

("Bankai: Sakashima Yokoshima Happoufusagari")

#q's plunnies #as it was #bleach #shinichi #shinji hirako #ichigo kurosaki

[wonjaekook]

If the Dress Fits

A/N: This fic is 80% Y/N and Chenle whining to their respective best friends about each other and like 20% actual plot, but it’s fine… to be honest, I had a really hard time writing this one for whatever reason? But enjoy !

21 Tropes: 8. High school/prom AU + turquoise w/Chenle

Description: Zhong Chenle had somehow not gotten himself a date for prom. He had, however, found out that you have the same favorite movie as him.

Word Count: 3.7k

Genre: fluff

Warnings: none

“This one, you’re getting this one.”

The dress that your friend Ryujin waves in front of you nearly makes you dizzy with how sparkly it is and you have to close your eyes and push her hand away. “I don’t like it,” you say, frowning, “It’s too much.”

“My friend,” she says, lowering the dress and slinging an arm around your shoulder, “you’re going to get a dress today whether you like it or not and, if you aren’t going to choose, I’ll pick one for you.”

“But I-”

“Don’t have a date, blah blah. I don’t care. You’re my best friend and you’re coming to prom no matter what.” Ryujin is beyond stubborn and you know there isn’t anything you can do to convince her to let you stay home.

“Well, I don’t like that one,” you say, turning back to the racks of long, beautiful dresses.

“Choose one soon or I’ll choose for you! We have to go make our hair and makeup appointments, too!”

“Such a waste of money,” you grumble under your breath, pushing dress after dress aside.

“It’s a perfectly good use of money! This is a once in a lifetime experience. Once. In. A. Lifetime!” As she emphasizes each word, you sigh heavily and just pull out the next dress you see.

“I’ll get this one.” Your best friend scrutinizes your choice, a displeased pout on her lips.

“You just chose that one randomly! At least put some thought into it-”

“I like the color and it’s pretty, isn’t that enough?”

She stares at you for a beat before giving in. “Fine, go try it on, then.” As you close the door of the changing room behind you, she shouts out another demand. “And you’d better come out with it on so I can see!” The changing process takes longer than you would have liked to admit, but you eventually step out with the zipper zipped and ribbon tied, showing Ryujin how the item looks on you. She scrutinizes you carefully, tugging at bits of cloth here and there until she sighs. “If you like it, then I like it. Somehow you chose one randomly that looks really good on you.”

You grin victoriously, ecstatic that you’re finally done with the most tedious shopping expedition you’ve ever been on. As you’re getting rung up, you’re also happy to find that the dress isn’t priced too badly either, so you begrudgingly let your best friend drag you along to your next stops without much complaint.

Unbeknownst to you, just a few stores over, Chenle and Jisung are performing a similar operation. Standing in a men’s formal wear store, Chenle is nearly as indecisive as you, but not for lack of caring. If anything, Jisung is the one who cares less of the two as he watches his friend fret.

“Can’t you just pick one?” The younger boy prods, impatiently standing while Chenle stares at the rows and rows of ties. “It’s not like you have anyone to match with.”

“Thanks for rubbing it in,” the elder grumbles, pouting while continuing to scan over the ties. He finally reaches out, picking up three.

“Why didn’t you ask someone, again?” Jisung asks, eyes wandering around the store.

“I didn’t really want to.” He shrugs before scrutinizing each tie carefully in his hands. “...and there’s no one I’m really interested in right now.”

His taller friend looks over his shoulder and points at one. “You should get that one.”

“Why?” Jisung shrugs in response. “Just because you said that, I’m getting this one.” Chenle puts the other two back and goes to the register, purchasing the tie.

You and Chenle make a somewhat unlikely pair. While he’s at least somewhat “cool,” you’re definitely not. He’s good at languages and music and sports, but you’re good at math and science. You’re about as opposite as you can get. That’s probably your biology teacher paired up the two of you.

“Who assigns a project the week before prom?” Chenle groans.

“Can we just focus and get some of this done tonight? I have a Calculus exam tomorrow that I need to study for, too.”

“I hate lab reports,” Chenle grumbles under his breath. You would have rolled your eyes if you didn’t completely agree.

“Same.”

He looks up at you, surprised at your response. “You don’t like writing lab reports?”

You give him an incredulous look. “Of course I don’t like writing lab reports! Who likes writing lab reports? I may be a nerd but I’m not that much of a nerd.”

“Oh,” he says, flushing in embarrassment. “Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it.” The two of you work as silently as possible for a while, only asking necessary questions. That is, until your phone begins to loudly go off. The chorus of “Start of Something New” from High School Musical blares and fills the room and you scramble to grab your phone, rejecting the call when you see that it’s just Ryujin. You take a minute to send her a panicked text, saying you’re working on a biology thing with Chenle, before you slowly turn back around to face him. He’s staring at you with wide eyes.

“You like High School Musical?” Slowly, you nod, cringing at yourself, and he lights up. “That’s my favorite movie!”

“Wait, really?” Your head snaps up and he’s grinning at you.

“Yeah! I make Jisung watch it with me at least twice a year.” You can’t help but smile back at his enthusiasm.

“I make Ryujin watch it with me every so often, too,” you say, staring back at him. “Going into high school, I always wanted it to be like the movie, but…” You trail off, the smile fading from your face. “I’m being dumb, never mind.”

“No, continue,” he encourages, gesturing at you. “I think I know what you’re talking about.”

“Maybe another time,” you say, somewhat bitterly, “let’s finish this lab report.”

The two of you don’t finish the lab report.

By the time you get through half of it, you realize that you’re basically just talking to yourself and Chenle is about a minute away from falling asleep, so you end the session there and make plans to work on it the next day. He agrees sleepily before packing up his stuff and leaving your house. You pull your phone out and flop down on your bed almost immediately after he leaves, seeing how Ryujin had responded to you earlier.

Bestie: you got paired up with Chenle? Zhong Chenle??

Y/N: YES and he finally left

Bestie: how was that? did you get along?

Y/N: it was fine, I found that he actually loves HSM too

Bestie: huh, really? cool i guess

Bestie: maybe this is your Gabriella moment and you can make him fall in love with

you…

Y/N: stop being weird, I’m not that delulu

Bestie: I’m serious, high school isn’t over yet! it’s not over until it’s over

Bestie: plus he’s cute, you should go for it

Y/N: stoppppp you’re being weird

You toss your phone to the side. Admittedly, when Chenle had first commented that he also loved the movie, you felt like your moment was finally coming, but you shut that feeling down quickly. There was no way you could ever, or he could ever, or that could ever-

You shake your head and smack your face with both palms, trying to clear your head. You really read too many romance novels.

As soon as Chenle leaves your house, he’s texting Jisung.

CL: JISUNG. CHENJI MEETING RIGHT NOW.

JS: what

JS: why are you trying to calling a meeting rn… what’s wrong

CL: Y/N IS SO CUTE

CL: AND SHE LIKES HSM

JS: uhh, nice?

CL: I WANT TO ASK HER OUT

JS: haven’t you had like… one conversation with her? isn’t that a little soon?

CL: …

CL: you’re right

JS: wait a little bit, i didn’t get my gf by jumping at the first girl i thought was cute

CL: your gf approached you first

JS: okay that’s not the point

CL: I’ll wait but I swear I’ve thought she’s cute since econ with her freshman year

JS: whatever you say

The next day, you try to ignore the face that Ryujin makes at you from across the hall as you exit biology class next to Chenle, opting to wave goodbye at him and turn a blind eye to your friend’s taunting.

“Can you not?” You say to her as soon as he leaves. “You’re still being weird!”

“I can smell the romance,” she says, dramatically wiping away a nonexistent tear from her eye, “my baby Y/N is finally getting action.”

“I’m not!” You’re on the verge of stomping your foot like a little kid with how frustrated you are. “We just have to work on a project together!” “I’m friends with Jisung, you know,” she says, “I could slip in a good word about you and that word could reach Chenle-” You hit her on the arm and she winces, pouting at you and shutting up. “Let me live and stop trying to set me up!”

“Fine,” she says, “I guess I’ll just have to let it happen naturally. I’ll leave it even more alone if you buy my banana milk today…?” She tries, but you shut her down with a glare, proceeding to walk to the cafeteria with her. While you’re sitting with your group of friends and eating, you make eye contact with Chenle as he passes by your table with Jisung and he smiles and waves, causing you to wave back. Your best friend sees, nudging you after he breaks eye contact and continues walking and you glare back at her.

When Chenle and Jisung get to their own table, the younger just rolls his eyes at the dreamy look on the elder’s face. “She’s so cute,” he says, leaning against his hand, his elbow on the table.

“Just eat your food.”

One thing you would never, ever admit to her is that you did, at one point, have a crush on your biology partner. You had a class with Chenle at one point in freshman year, economics if you remember correctly. The dynamic was similar to how it is now, but you had been even more quiet then. You don’t think he even knew you existed, which you’re fine with now. When you think about yourself from freshman year, you cringe, just like most other people. But, now, working with him on this project is bringing back the tiny fluttering butterflies in your stomach that you had repressed years before. Ryujin’s comments just bring you false hope because you’re almost certain you have no chance. So, once again, you push back those thoughts and go back to your lunch.

At your house later, you and Chenle work hard on your lab report, spending most of your time relatively silently for about an hour before he sighs and collapses dramatically over his work. “Ah, this is so hard.” “Yeah,” you agree, “I hate this. But we have to finish.”

“Uh-huh…” he says absentmindedly, lifting his head and glancing around your room. “You said…” “What?” You ask, looking away from your work and up at him.

“You said you wanted your life to be like the movie, right?” Your heart beats faster in your chest at the question and you can feel heat rise to your face, tinging it red. “Can you sing?”

“No,” you say quickly, looking at your hands, “and please don’t ask me to demonstrate. I’m so bad that I shatter glass, I swear.”

His high, squeaky laugh makes you lighten up a little bit. “I won’t ask, but I also don’t think anyone is that bad. And I know, I’ve tutored voice lessons. Anyone can sing if they practice enough.”

“Mhm, maybe. You’ve never heard me sing before.” You find yourself smiling at him.

“We should go to karaoke sometime,” he says. You wouldn’t have known, but the invitation is very spur of the moment, something that just escapes his lips before he can really think about what he’s saying.

“Sure.” You agree reluctantly, not quite believing that he’s implying that he wants to hang out with you more.

In his head, he’s screaming at himself. He just casually asked you out. He just casually asked you out?!

“If you don’t sing,” he says, trying to move on from what he just did, “then, do you dance?” “A little,” you respond hesitantly. “I taught myself some just in case.”

“Wait, really?” He exclaims, surprised. “I can’t dance at all.” “Anyone can dance if they practice enough. Besides, how are you going to dance with your date at prom if you don’t learn?” He doesn’t respond right away, so you swallow hard. “Assuming you’re going?” “I’m going!” He says quickly, making you relax slightly. “I just don’t have a date.” “You don’t?” You ask tentatively, unsure of how sensitive the topic is for him.

“Yeah. It’s whatever. But even Jisung got a date! I’m gonna have to third-wheel all night.” You laugh softly at his response.

“I feel that. I don’t have one either and I know Ryujin and her boyfriend are going to be all over each other. I’m going to try my best not to look.” When you say that you don’t have a date, he looks up at you, surprised.

“You don’t have a date? Really?” “What do you mean, really? Is it that surprising?” You quirk an eyebrow at him, confused.

“Yeah, I mean, you’re one of the smartest girls in our class and you’re cute. Why…?” You flush at his compliments. He really sees you like that?

Once again, he’s internally screaming at how casually he’s saying things to you today. He’s also far too relieved by the fact that you don’t have a date to prom.

“I- I guess I just… don’t talk to guys a lot?” You squeak out. “Why don’t you have a date?”

“There was no one I wanted to ask,” he huffs, crossing his arms before he echoes your words. “Is it that surprising?”

“To be honest, yeah,” you say, your filter suddenly gone, “you’re cute and popular and you’re good at what you do, so…” Silence hangs somewhat heavily between the two of you as you blush at each other, contemplating what could come next.

“Do you want to-”

“Maybe you and I-”

You start to speak at the same time and stop. “You go first,” you say. “No, you.” He responds. Smiles slowly creep onto your faces before you both start laughing, eliminating the tension in the air. After your laughter dies, you smile at him again.

“We should probably finish this stupid lab report.”

He nods. “Yeah, probably. Do you want to watch High School Musical after we’re done?”

You agree and get back to work. As you finish the assignment and sit on your bed with him, watching the movie, you try to ignore the fact that Zhong Chenle called you cute and that you called him cute back. You definitely try to ignore the fact that you almost asked him to be your date to prom when you’d only had like two conversations with him and the dance itself is in two days. However, you try the hardest to ignore the way that the two of you had just clicked when you were talking and how sitting next to him, watching your shared favorite movie under mounds of your pillows and blankets, feels so natural, too natural.

You try to ignore how your heart beats faster when you talk to him and he excitedly talks back to you during biology, or when you meet eyes with him across the cafeteria and he smiles at you.

But, no matter how hard you try, you can’t ignore the reemerging feelings. As you’re getting your hair and makeup done, you can’t help but wonder what he’ll think when, or if, he sees you at the dance. You can’t help but wonder if he was messing with you when he said he didn’t have a date, or if you were getting your hopes too high up that maybe he had been about to ask the same question to you as you were to him when you were studying together, or if you would even see him at all.

Ryujin snaps you out of it by literally snapping her fingers in front of your face, jolting you out of your thoughts. “Hey, today is a happy day! I can see those gears turning in your head and I’m telling you to turn them off and enjoy yourself for once. This is prom! You’re going to have fun whether you like it or not and I’ll make sure of that!”

“This is why you’re my best friend,” you say, hugging her, “thank you.”

“That’s what I’m here for,” she says, lighting up again. “Now, let’s get you into that dress.”

On the other side of town, Chenle is fretting about nearly the same thing as you, but a bit more vocally.

“What if she’s just being nice? What if she doesn’t actually think I’m cute? What if she doesn’t want to dance with me because I told her I’m not good at it? What if-” “Please, please stop,” Jisung whines, sick of hearing his friend complain about this girl for hours. He aggressively adjusts his tie, manhandling it into the right place as he speaks. “Just ask her to dance later. It’s not hard. You’re supposed to be the confident one, so just do it!”

“She’s too cute. I won’t be able to handle seeing her today.”

“You’ll be fine. Just try to have a good time.”

For the nth time, he has to agree with Jisung, even if it’s quite as romantic of an outlook.

When you step out of the relatively nice car that Ryujin’s boyfriend is driving, you feel like a princess. Even though you don’t have a prince of your own yet and you had been moping not three hours before, you find that the venue is dazzling. Pretty fake-crystal decorations are draped around lights and everything is adorned with off-white cloth that falls beautifully, like tiny waterfalls of fabric. Your best friend gasps when she gets out of the car, grabbing onto your arm and pointing at the various pretty things all around. After she is done with her initial shock, she reaches out, grabbing her date’s hand and dragging him along with her, with you trailing behind.

To your sadness, you don’t spot Chenle until everyone is sitting at their tables, eating the nice dinner that your school had catered for you. You can only see the back of his head and shoulders, his hair seeming to be neatly styled and a tuxedo replacing his usual casual outfit. You forget about him for a while as you eat and chat with your friends, sending compliments to everyone at your table. When the dancing starts, you have a decent time standing in a circle with your friends, making a fool of yourself with your silly dance moves under the disco ball and colorful moving lights setup, and having more fun than you had expected. Then, the first slow dance starts and you awkwardly step off the dance floor with all of the other single people, standing back and watching people dance.

Except, as you step off, someone taps on your shoulder.

You turn around and find Chenle, no date in sight, just like he had said. His eyes are wide when he looks at you, staring at your whole getup. “You look really pretty.”

“Thanks,” you say, grinning up at him. “You look handsome.”

Your gaze travels over his outfit, stopping at his tie, and you freeze. The two of you seem to realize at the same time. Your dress, a long, sweeping gown with ample lace and sparkle, is the same shade of turquoise blue as his silk, patterned tie.

“I guess this means something, right?” He looks at you, meeting your eyes earnestly. “You don’t have a date, I don’t have a date, but we somehow ended up matching anyways. Even though I’m not good at it, do you-”

“-want to dance? Yes.” He takes your hand, pulling you onto the dance floor.

For the first time in your life, you feel like you’re a part of a story, dancing at prom in one of your cheesy high school romance novels or movies. You’re Gabriella and he’s Troy and you couldn’t be happier just swaying with him, avoiding complicated steps and just enjoying each other’s slightly clumsy but entirely heartfelt moves.

After the song ends, you escape with him to a quieter part of the venue, chatting with him for what seems like hours about anything and everything that comes to mind, only occasionally going back in to dance sometimes. At some point, while you’re outside the main room with him, Ryujin passes you on her way to the bathroom, making a face at you, and you know you’re going to be getting some sort of scolding later. Chenle laughs his cute, squeaky laugh as you pull a face back at her. You think a few people from your grade who pass you are confused when they see you together, wearing a matching dress and tie, but you find it in you to not care.

But, the night has to come to a close at some point, and you reluctantly say goodbye to him when Ryujin sends you a whiny text that she wants to go home. The magic doesn’t leave as you go to her house for a small after party, featuring a movie that you both fall asleep to after you take your makeup off and change into more comfortable clothes.

When you wake up, your feet ache from the heels you wore the night before, and the pain is the little evidence you have to prove that the night actually happened. You hope with all your heart that the night meant as much to you as it did to Chenle and your heart slowly sinks as you check your phone, finding no notifications from him.

Then, while you’re eating breakfast with Ryujin, you see it.

Chenle: Since we just did something you’re good at and you agreed to it earlier, karaoke some time?

#nct fluff #chenle fluff #neowritingsnet #nct dream fluff #nct high school au #nct prom au #wonjaekook #hmm.... i feel like i didn't give myself enough time to really develop anything in this fic #but hopefully it doesn't read that way and i'm just being too harsh on myself #but please enjoy this fluff piece after the last super angsty one!!

[hellevator-mp3]

chewing gum (or rather, ring pops)

Pairing(s): Chenji/Chensung

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 1200+

Warnings: None!

Author Note: okay so this wasn’t meant to be written so soon...but my fingers slipped...over 7000 times...dflgklh anyways enjoy some cute chenji/chensung!

jisung remembers almost everything about his relationship with chenle - when they went from being just ‘chenle and jisung’ to ‘chenji’ or ‘chensung'.

there's just one thing he's not quite clear on - when they went from being 'childhood friends' to being 'the nastiest couple alive', as it was put by a mr. na jaemin

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jisung remembers meeting chenle in kindergarten. he remembers stumbling to the playground on his short baby legs, feet unsteady on the rock pathway that jutted from the ground. he remembers stepping over the wooden divider that separated the mulch from the dirt, almost tripping as the tip of his toe caught on the wood. he remembers seeing a head of mousy brown hair pop up from behind the seesaw, watching him with dark eyes glistening with curiosity. he remembers greeting the boy, a flush prominent on his cheeks. he remembers the high tone of the boy who introduced himself as chenle, and remembers asking where chenle was from, and asking to be taught some of the other's native language, the two of them spending half an hour giggling over jisung's horrible pronunciation as chenle tried to play teacher, before their real teacher came to retrieve them at the end of recess. before they were separated, their pinky fingers were locked and they promised to be best friends forever.

jisung remembers the day that he realized he fell for chenle. it was years after they met, now in the second grade. they were huddled over a comic book at lunch, and jisung happened to glance over as jisung was mouthing an unfamiliar word to himself, racking his brain to find the meaning. chenle had his bottom lip caught between his teeth, worrying away at it gently. jisung caught one of the elder boy's hands in his, bringing him from his thoughts. jisung translated the word as best as he could using what little mandarin he knew. the blinding smile that he got from chenle made the struggle worth it, and when he turned away, jisung remembers laying a hand on his own chest to feel how fast his heart was beating. jisung remembers feeling the butterflies in his stomach at the realization that chenle's hand was still clutched in his own, and the other didn't seem to mind it.

jisung remembers the the day that he finally confessed, in a way. he had dragged chenle to the park, not letting go until chenle was seated on one of the lowest steps of the jungle gym. he remembers dropping to his knees, pulling out a cherry flavored ring pop, and holding it out to chenle, uttering some stupid one liner that he found on the internet. he remembers third grade chenle eying him suspiciously, dark eyes narrowing as he took in the boy before him. jisung remembers the smile that suddenly emerged, the elder dipping down and kissing him on the cheek, murmuring a 'yes’. jisung remembers walking home hand in hand with chenle, watching as the boy made it safely to the door before walking to his own house, silently celebrating the whole way.

(of course, jisung also remembers doing some dumb dance and singing ‘ring pop’ afterwards to the tune of some song he heard on the radio, trying to coax chenle into doing the dance with him - the other refused)

jisung remembers one day more than any other. he remembers it being normal, the two of them walking to class together when chenle suddenly stopped in his tracks. he remembers asking what was wrong, wondering if he had said something in the past 24 hours that needed to be addressed. chenle just sighed, quickly soothing jisung’s anxieties with soft reassurances, before dropping the bombshell that would essentially change their entire dynamic. chenle, in all of his fifth grade glory, told jisung that he liked him. like, like-liked him. his face turned a furious red, and jisung could feel the reeling of his stomach at the confession. he remembers running to the bathroom, wondering if what he was feeling was bile rising, or the shock of knowing that his best friend liked him back. he remembers that he had caught up to chenle later that day, grabbed his face between his hands, and kissed him like no one was watching. of course, he remembers being yelled at by a teacher, but they had just laughed and ran off.

jisung remembers it all, remembers how they went from ‘chenle and jisung’ to ‘chenji’ or ‘chensung’. he remembers how he went from being alone one day, to never being alone again.

and of course, nothing had changed in the eight years since then. their affection was just shared behind the door of their dorm room, where they had been since the first day of their college experience. however, that’s not where jisung found himself on that fated day.

instead, he was currently draped over one of the couches in their student lounge on their floor, studying. the problems that he was working on seemed to swim before his eyes, causing a frown to etch itself into his face almost permanently. he rubbed sullenly at his eyes, willing away the frustrated tears that welled up out of nowhere. one slipped past his defenses, leaving a trail running down his face. amongst all of the stress that he had been put under, what with having to get a job as soon as he could and with finals coming up and the amount of work that he had piled up and waiting for him - the dam broke and he finally broke down. luckily enough for him, the lounge was empty, leaving him to let his feelings out in peace before settling back down to study. he gave himself five minutes, no more, no less, to allow himself to break down and build himself back up. after three minutes, the door squeaked open, and he covered his face with sweater covered hands, until he saw that the culprit was chenle, who came bearing a bag that jisung knew for a fact was full of sweets.

it took no more than five seconds for chenle to see the puffiness of his eyes and hear the unsteadiness of his breath, and no more than seven for him to pad over to the boy with the bright blue hair, pulling him to his chest and allowing him to break in his arms. jisung nuzzled his face closer, hands gripping at the hem of chenle’s shirt as he let it all out, silently counting down and pulling away when he reached zero.

chenle knew what he was going through, opting to wipe away stray tears instead of questioning him over it, and excitedly showing him the snacks that he bought. with a gasp, chenle nearly flung the bag away from him while clutching an item that jisung couldn’t make out. when chenle dropped to one knee in front of him, jisung eyed him suspiciously, before chenle held out an unwrapped blue raspberry ring pop, and jisung couldn’t stop himself from crying even more at the sight.

of course, the two of them had talked often of the future, but he never thought that it would come around so quickly.

only a week later, chenle was sliding a blue band up his ring finger, and jisung was sliding a red one up chenle’s finger. “it’s a promise ring, not an engagement ring. unless you want it to be an engagement ring, then it can be-” chenle had rushed out, before jisung cut him off with a soft kiss.

“i’m okay with whatever you want it to be.” jisung whispered in reply later that night, as the two of them slipped into a comforting sleep.

#nct fic #chenji #chensung #zhong chenle #park jisung #nct

[bookenders]

11/11/11 Tag Game: Round... uh... 5, 6, & 7?

I got tagged by a bunch of people ( @quilloftheclouds is this how your 77 question one felt??) so here are a bunch of answers! I think this is the most I’ve ever talked about myself in my life. 

Good gracious, you’re all so nice and have such good questions.

Tagged by: @surroundedbypearls, @waterfallwritings, @bigmoodword, @sundaynightnovels

Rules: answer 11 questions, tag 11 people, give them 11 new questions!

[I’ve done this enough to be able to break the tag rules. Fight me.]

44 questions and answers below the cut!

But I’ll be nice and put my questions right here:

What would you do for a Klondike bar?

When do you title your WIPs? It is the first thing you do? The last? Does it come to you during drafting?

How many inside jokes do you put in your WIP(s)?

Your WIP’s antagonist is now The Riddler. How do your OCs handle that?

Do you use sticky notes?

Laptop or desktop?

Your OC is a wrestler. What’s their hype music?

Do you own any craft books/books on writing?

What’s your favorite book cover?

How many unread books do you have sitting around right now? Which are you most excited to maybe get to eventually some time?

How committed are you to your outline(s)?

Bilbo Taggins: Literally anyone, but also @francestroublr, @sahados-shadow, @a-story-im-writing, @bethkerring, @citruschickadee, @bos-ingit

If I’ve tagged you before, you can totally ignore this. In fact, I encourage you to.

From @surroundedbypearls:

What’s your favourite genre to write in and why? Literary fiction! It’s what I learned in university and the one that fits my themes best. Sci-fi is hard, I’m just getting into writing fantasy stuff, I can’t do thrillers, romance is hard for me, and historical is too much work.

Do you think you have a style/voice that you use more often in your writing? When did you develop that style? If you’ve read one of my stories, you know exactly how my writing voice sounds. It doesn’t change too much. I write like I talk, but if I had a lot more gravitas and charisma. Honestly, I’ve always had that kind of style, but it really developed in high school. It’s been getting stronger since then. It’s one of the things I always got comments about from my teachers and fellow workshop writers. “Your voice is so strong!” Yep. It’s mah thang.

Do you play video games? What’s your favourite? YES I DO. It’s hard to pick faves, but I’ve played Dragon Age: Origins too many times. 

If you were going to do a WIP crossover, which OCs would be most interesting together? (If you’ve only got one WIP crossover with something else) A crossover between H2H and AOPC? Interesting. I think Mel and Keema would get along the best, Oz would have some fightin’ words for Elder Sanga, and Gemma and Teva would be a force to be reckoned with, my god. Two stubborn nerds who believe totally different things but are also very determined to be very good at what they want to do and love their communities to a fault? Fear them.

Do you prefer to plan WIPs in a document or through handwritten notes? I used to do it by hand but I couldn’t read it because my handwriting is terrible and I kept losing papers. I do it in docs now. Much easier to organize and incredibly legible.

Do you multiple languages exist in your WIP? If so how do you address that in the story? H2H is set in the “real world,” so yep. It hasn’t been addressed too much yet, but I have a way for tackling languages. I’ve written multilingual-ish stories before. I never write phonetically and use hella context clues so the reader knows the gist of what was said if another character doesn’t translate.

What’s your favourite animated film that’s not Disney or Pixar? AN AMERICAN TAIL. All of them. It’s on Netflix go watch it and marvel at the way a kids movie talks about Jewish immigration, poverty, and cultural oppression via mice. As a young Jewish child, this movie was my jam. It’s very dark, though.

Do your real-life surroundings influence your WIP’s settings? Nope! One time I tried to write a story set in the same area where I lived and I couldn’t do it. Too weird. Sometimes I’ll write in an item I see near me, or like, a painting or poster on the wall if I need some set decoration, but that’s about it.

Which OCs would be most likely to break the fourth wall? Oz. Lookin’ at the camera like he’s in The Office.

How do you work out your OCs’ personalities? Hm. I look at the story I’m trying to write and make a protagonist that would have the most interesting experience in that narrative. For H2H, I wanted someone who would be loyal as heck to the people they loved while still being experimental enough to try new things and get into shenanigans. The story called for someone like that, and there she was. Mel came about my thinking of someone who would compliment other characters in the story while still being their own person. If that makes sense. I think of dynamics and interactions with the story world in relation to the theme(s). Most of the time they just happen, though.

Do you prefer worldbuilding or character building? Character building! As much as I like making stories about places, making characters is more fun for me, and more interesting. You should see all the DnD character sheets I have. 

From @waterfallwritings:

1. How do you come up with ideas for your WIPs?

At random. Seriously. It’s like my brain has to be running something in the background to function normally, and usually that something is whatever story I happen to be working on. Or I’ll look at a thing and go “huh.” My brain also likes to twist normal things to be a little bit different.

2. How do you get past gaps in the plot?

No idea, man. It’s like throwing spaghetti at a wall. I like to work backwards. If this is what I want to happen, what needs to happen before that to ensure that it occurs? I look at all the elements currently in the story and see if one can be manipulated to fill in the hole.

3. What motivates you to keep writing?

If I don’t, my brain gets all constipated and angry until I write something down. Like, seriously, I get grumpy and frustrated like I’m hangry or something. Aside from physical need, I love writing. I love word puzzles and feelings puzzles and figuring them out. Sometimes I think of how my stories could help someone, or make them feel something that they enjoy. 

4. Do you do any other kind of creative writing?

Oh, man, I’ve done it all. Screenwriting, playwriting, poetry, video game-ish writing, interactive storytelling, short stories, flash fiction, proposals, essays, DnD campaigns, monologues... You name it, I’ve probably tried it. I tend to stick to prose and poetry these days.

5. Do you have any other creative hobbies besides writing?

I’ve gotten into graphic design a little bit. I kind of wanna learn how to knit again. I’m not really very crafty. 

6. What do you do when you’re stuck on a scene and don’t know how to get it out / write it?

Write a different scene, stare at the screen in frustration until I give up and go to sleep, meditate for a few minutes, go do something else to get my mind off of it, clean, work on a different project.

7. How do you decide how to end your WIP?

I mean, see the next question for part of my answer. How did I decide to end H2H? My friend, that’s a big ‘ole spoiler. But I decided to end it at a place where everything, and everyone, comes together.

8. When in the process of writing do you decide how its going to end? Or do you kind of just wait til you get there?

Right at the beginning. If I don’t know where it’ll end, I have a hard time writing the arc. I work backwards: start with the idea, then think of where I want it to end up, then work back to the beginning until I know where its going, then start writing.

9. Why did you decide to join writeblr?

My reasons are pretty personal, but the least personal is that I needed some accountability and motivation. And I missed being in a good writing community.

10. What’s your favourite food?

Pasta! I’m eating spaghetti right now.

11. If you had to kill off a character in your WIP, who would it be and why?

Oz would be the most tragic. Treena would be the most logical. 

From @bigmoodword:

1. using one sentence summaries, can you tell me about your wips?

Nerdy potion woman meets cute odd stranger who helps her solve magic mysteries in their quirky small town.

2. what inspired them?

I saw a zine accepting submissions for magic stories, then an open call for queer shifter stories, and thought “what if wholesome magical lesbians?”

3. which of your ocs do you most identify with?

Gemma!

4. if you’ve ever cried while reading, which book cued the waterworks?

THE SONG OF ACHILLES.  My God, my soul was weeping. Honestly, it still is. Doesn’t matter that I knew the story from the Iliad. Madeline Miller is a feelings wizard.

5. how do you conduct research for your wips and what’s the most interesting thing you’ve discovered in said research?

On an as-needed basis. I used to do way too much research to avoid actually writing the damn thing, so now I only do it when I actually run into a problem that can be solved by Google.

6. thus far, which scene has been the most difficult to write?

The ones that aren’t hugely emotional. Which is... unfortunate.

7. which of your ocs do you like the least?

Rude. On a personal level, Jill. I love her, but I would not be friends with her. We wouldn’t mesh at all.

8. which pov and tense do you prefer to write in?

Third person limited present tense! To the bane of everyone who’s ever edited my work.

9. do you write poetry?

I do! Not often, though.

10. who is your writing role model?

My freakin’ writing professor from college. He is crazy disciplined.

11. if you could give your younger writer self some advice, what would it be?

Hey, you know those people who say your writing is too dark? Yeah, they suck and they’re wrong. They just want kids to live up to their expectations and write happy sunshiny stories about unicorns and dinosaurs having ice cream. And you’re not depressed because you wrote that one sad poem one time and someone asked if you were depressed. What you have is called feelings and they’re very useful for a writer, nay, a human, to have.

From @sundaynightnovels:

Who is your biggest role model? Okay, so I got crap all the time in grade school for never having a role model, and I still don’t have one. The teachers were concerned about me. But my reasoning was, “why should I want to live someone else’s life?” Yeah. They didn’t really know what to do with that...

What are your OCs favorite foods? Sort of answered here!

Which OC is most afraid of the dark? Oz and Mary!

What made you want to start a writing blog/participate in the writeblr community? Answered above!

Did you sleep with a stuffed animal as a kid? Do you still? I did, indeed. I don’t anymore, but I have two that I shuffle around my room when they get in the way. One is a highland cow I got in Scotland (he has a plaid hat), the other is a blue whale I got at the Museum of Natural History in NY.

Do you like donuts? I love donuts. Especially jelly filled ones. Mmm.

Do/would your OCs like donuts? All of my OCs like donuts. I don’t think Mel has ever had a modern one, though.

What is your least favorite food? Cauliflower? I’m the household taste-tester, so there’s been a lot of stuff I don’t like.  ( @sundaynightnovels I hate sparkling water, too, you’re not alone!)

What is your ideal writing environment? Comfy seating, a chair with no arms (stupid elbows), alone, plenty of chosen beverage within reach, headphones.

Favorite line from your WIP? So far, it’s this one!

Favorite quote from a book? Oh, man. There are so many. From recent memory, here are a few: “’Give it time,’ she replies. ‘It won’t be a story forever.’“  and “Everyone has heard stories of women like us, and now we will make more of them.” (both from The Ladies Guide to Petticoats and Piracy) “When he smiled, the skin at the corners of his eyes crinkled like a leaf held to flame.” and “I lean forward and our lips land clumsily on each other. They are like the fat bodies of bees, soft and round and giddy with pollen.” (I could write a goddamn essay about the imagery in this scene.) (It is quite possibly my favorite description of a kiss ever. And the metaphor extends through the rest of the scene so artfully ugh.) (both from The Song of Achilles) “The thing about a story is that you dream it as you tell it, hoping that others might then dream along with you, and in this way memory and imagination and language combine to make spirits in the head.” (from The Things They Carried)

#11/11/11 tag #about me #tag game #writer tag #oh my god so many questions #fun stuff below the cut #forgive my terrible jokes I am tired #writeblr #how I write #I guess #rec #book rec

[thedigitalpen]

5 minute anime review: “Amaama to Inazuma”.

What it’s about? Slice-of-life about a teacher (whose wife passed away 6 months prior to where the story starts) and his daughter and their daily lives - the main focus being the meals that the two of them eat. Most of the cooking was handled by his wife so now he and his daughter mainly eat frozen foods and convenience store bentos. Through a chance meeting, dad becomes acquainted with a high school girl from his class and, through a small series of events, she invites him to join her in cooking and eating various meals along with his daughter. Realising that he has close to zero cooking skills, the dad eventually accepts and so begins this anime that heavily revolves around the three main characters and their culinary adventures/experiments in the kitchen as they learn to cook from scratch.

What I liked? It’s a show revolving around Japanese food so I’m already fully invested because it’s my own personal interest, but what gives it credibility is that the recipes are completely realistic and you could probably make the food in your own home based on the recipes they use in the anime. I also liked that this was very much a stress-free watch because there was no major drama of any kind - no one questioning why the teacher sees his student so much, no conniving or gossiping mothers at the day-care that his daughter attends. Just gastronomic tales on a week-by-week basis. Most of the drama comes from the relationship between father and daughter as they go through the usual hiccups every now and then. There are some additional characters too and they add to the show in a good way - never really detracting from the main characters, but raising the interest level with some new dynamic interactions between all the characters.

What I liked a little less? While the story and the premise of cooking meals with the three of them (and sometimes other friends) is great, I felt a little dissatisfied with the story of the high school girl and, to a lesser extent, the other friends. She obviously plays a big role here because she’s always present for every meal but her story/motivations are glossed over so it remains a mystery as to why her character is the way it is and what she gets out of cooking and eating with her teacher and his daughter. A general reason and a couple of hints (a second-hand account and a minor flashback -like 2 seconds, seriously) are given but nothing is ever actually explained and no one, not even the teacher, ever asks. It’s just sort of accepted without anyone being interested in her side of the story. I felt that while it’s fine that the focus be on the teacher and his kid, there was so much potential to make this a much deeper story but it just never reached that far. Same goes for the two other recurring characters. I would have liked to seen more of them because they just add freshness to the scenes but alas, it might be something that’s fated to exist in the manga, which is still ongoing. Oh and the daughter cries, throws tantrums and makes scenes here and there so, if you’re like me, brace yourself for some second-hand embarrassment/irritation as you watch those particular moments.

Could, should or wouldn’t watch? For me this is a “could watch”. It’s got a good concept revolving around cooking and how, for a lot of people, this is a way to convey love and affection - especially between elders (parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles etc.) and youngsters. Food may be a basic need but the preparation of it can be part of the bonding process and a fun activity that brings family and friends closer together. It’s got a good message and, even though it’s light on backstory, it’s pleasant to watch and has realistic recipes that would work in your own kitchen. It’s not something I would insist that my friends watch but if you’re in the mood for cute, stress-free slice-of-life then this is a good choice.

#amaama to inazuma #sweetness and lightning #anime #5 minute review #could watch

[littlemisssquiggles]

RWBY Remarks: So I just finished watching the first episode of RWBY V6. More specifically the official opening…

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOY! Do I have a few things to say about this new RWBY V6 opening.  I’m just going to leave them undercut because of spoilers to anyone who hasn’t seen the episode yet. Only keep reading if you have seen the episode. You have been warned…

To kick things off, to the folks who told me Ruby and Oscar had cute moments this episode, why ya’ll lie to me like that? Had a home girl going into V6 thinking we might get a full shot of Oscar blushing at Ruby. I mean, we got Ruby smiling at Oscar after saving him and defending him-ish from Qrow which I guess is nice. But for future reference, holla at me only if these two kids are blushing at or because of each other. Shoot. We got more Whiterose moments from this episode and the opening which…is so nice CRWBY =___=  No shade at Whiterose by the way, I just want some RoseGarden please.

I know it’s only episode one and we still got 13 more episodes and I should chill but…please CRWBY, don’t leave us RG shippers dry in a season that you foreshadowed was gonna hint at these two growing close. Please.

But at least Renora is more confirmed now than it ever was in the history of RWBY. Even got them cuddling in the intro. I see you Renora!

Elder Silver Eyes

I knew it! Maz Katara is going to be Silver Eyed Warrior or at least someone who used to be one and will probably school Ruby in the arts of using her powers. I’m going to say this now, I HOPE Maz Katara sticks around for more than just one season. I hope she goes with them to Atlas. I dunno. She only said one line this entire episode and I LOVE HER ALREADY! I’m excited to learn more about her and see what her dynamic with Ruby will be like.

JNPR Foreshadowing?

If this doesn’t scream foreshadowing for Oscar to join up with JNR to reform Team JNPR then I don’t know what else to say. I hope this V6 touches on Oscar joining them. He needs a team! C’mon JNPR REBIRTH! Also what is Oscar reading? Is he reading about Atlas and robots?

Qrow’s Grimm End?

Okay this shot here throw me for a real loopdiloop! Is Qrow going to be possessed by some kind of Ultimate Geist Grimm at some point during V6 and Ruby will have to be the one to either save him/ kill him in the process using her Silver Eyed Warrior powers?

Neopolitan Rises??

To the people who’ve been waiting for Neo to return, I think you’re going to finally get your wish this volume.

Salem Was Human Before?

So I guess my theory about Salem formerly having a human form that was somehow connected to Ozpin the First was technically on the right path to being canon.

The Past Ozpins

Arguably my favourite shot in the entire opening, not gonna lie. I’d love to muse more on this if I get the chance. 

I’m going to assume that these were all past incarnates of Ozpin because the way the footage transitions makes me think of Avatar how they basically go down the line of lineage. I see four previous incarnates leading into Oscar.But what I need to put my finger on is which incarnates in Remnant’s history are these guys specific to. They wouldn’t show them if they weren’t important to what we already know about Remnant and it’s history.

Okay for the sake of things I’m just going to call these guys by the following names. The dude in the Armour, I’m going to call him Patrick. Or should I say, King Patrick. I think that’s the King of Vale? If it is then the King of Vale, he foine though. Also what I find interesting is that most of Oz’s incarnatestend to be tanned or dark skinned with the exception of Norman---the Headmaster of Beacon.

The nerdy looking dude who looks like he can be some of sort of architect (reminds me of Milo from Atlantis), I’m going to call him Isaac. I think this incarnate might be the guys who helped build the four Huntsmen Academies. Like I said he looks like an architect to me…or at least a teacher? Could be wrong?

And the dude with the white hair who looks like a magician, I’ll call him Zoroaster cause he LOOKS like a Zoraster. But yeah, these are Oz’s past selves, apart from the King of Vale and Issac, I’m not sure where Zoraster comes in. Wait….could that be the HERMIT!!!! I wonder though. I wonder if Blue Boy is the Hermit!

Will talk more about this sometime later when I get more evidence.

Tension Between Jaune and Oscar.

 Dammit Jaune why are you hurting my son! Paws off and chill bro!

Y’know CRWBY, when I said I wanted Jaune and Oscar to interact more, this is not what I had in mind. But then again, I’m not surprised by this. There is some unresolved stuff surrounding Pyrrha that Oz has to answer for so this is bound to stir up some repressed anger in Jaune.

Closing Remarks:

Man, the White Rose shippers are going to have a field day with this new opening. Not sound salty but I was hoping that the opening would’ve hinted at Ruby protecting Oscar like the poster did but…noooooo! None! I feel like V6 is setting up to leave us RoseGarden and Rosebud fans high and dry like the Black Sun shippers. Of course I kid but...CRWBY I hope you deliver on that blossoming RG friendship this season. Please, for my heart!

But apart from that, what do I have to say about this first episode overall. Well for starters, this episode blew my mind! This is first first episode of the Mistral Arc that actually got me pumped for the season. This isn’t to say that the last two season openers were boring. They just weren’t one this level! If this is how the first episode kicked off then I’m excited for the second!

I hope it continues with this type of energy. I’m also excited to see Maz Katara reveal herself as a Silver Eyed Warrior and kick fucking ASSS!

Speaking of Maz Katara, is THAT WHY SHE WEARS THE VISORS? To help control her powers! It would explain a lot if she was so.

Also, one thing I have to note though is how incredibly intelligent the Sphinx and Manticore Grimm are. We’ve learnt that Grimm could evolve and adapt but thing that I took from this episode is how freaking smart though Grimm were to avoid the tunnel. That’s actually quite cool since most of the Grimm we’ve seen are just ferocious beasts fuelled by their bloodlust.

I hope we get to see more “intelligent Grimm” for the season. But yeah, overall, guys I’m excited. I can’t even edit my thoughts on this. This episode was fantastic!

On one final note, can I just say how proud I am of my boy Oscar Pine this episode! MY BOY KICKED ASS AND HE DIDN’T EVEN NEED OZPIN! My boy FOUGHT LIKE A HUNTSMEN AND I AM PROUD! Oscar, KEEP THIS UP! YOU’RE DOING WONDERFUL SO FAR BABY!

But yeah! V6! I’m ready for MORE! Now will you excuse me, I’m going to go watch this episode again so that I can analyze the shit out of each detail.

~LittleMissSquiggles (2018)

#squiggles remarks #oscar pine #ruby rose #rwby v6 spoilers

[zzapathetic]

Ad Hominem is a Fallacy of Irrelevance

After thousands of posts it occurred to me that this blog needs a disclaimer. This disclaimer must amount to something like, I have no experience and know very little about anything and this is me trying to figure things out, and please keep that in mind, and it would be lovely if you’d occasionally remind me of that because I keep forgetting. I’m a little too ambitious to put it in those terms, however. For one thing, I want my disclaimer to come from a place of honest humility. I see all these bloggers putting up these very cute little disclaimers saying, oh, I’m so random and I contradict myself all the time, and they wear their young ages and relative lack of experience as badges of pride, but really they’re quite sure they’ve figured things out, and their humility is more like a check-mark in a list of cultural signifiers they want to make up their online personas than any heartfelt desire to warn people from taking them too seriously. I want my disclaimer not to actually disclaim responsibility for my screw-ups, nor to discourage people from actually engaging seriously with my ideas; rather, it should be an honest admission of objective facts and an invitation to be critical, to see through bullshit, but also to appreciate that which manages to transcend its unauthoritative origins. I think arguing from a place of unauthoritativeness — from a position where no one has any respect for your scholarly merits, where you have no reputation as someone who knows what they’re talking about — by necessity produces the best arguments.

The internet has, to some degree, brought me up. On the internet, nobody knows you’re thirteen and an idiot, unless you give them reason to suspect as much. I pretended to be an adult on the internet for so long. I’m sure many saw right through me and decided to humor me anyway, and for that I’m eternally grateful. I never told anyone I was forty-four, had a wife, three kids and a dog and owned a house with a picket fence in the suburbs; I simply neglected to mention that I was, say, 14 and typing out my explication on Pascal’s Wager or free will from my parents’ basement while waiting for my mom to finish making me dinner. I’d jump in and attempt to play by adult rules with zero respect for my elders. I can’t recall anyone calling me out on age. I’ve had my arguments ripped to shreds more times than I can count, but that’s ok. Internet forums, at least the ones I’d frequent, were pretty meritocratic. Respect was a function of the quality of your posts, which was a function not of age or experience but of logical force and, occasionally, tenure (which was measured not in years but in number of posts or, at times, join date, but it’s pretty easy to be an oldtimer on a forum because internet years are like dog years). My teachers would praise my ability to string together complicated arguments backed up by evidence; I developed those skills by getting an education at the University of the Internets, which doesn’t give you a break for being young and stupid.

All of this is really wonderful. I’m so grateful to all the internet people that have contributed to my education. I hope that when I’m forty and some 14-year-old kid on the internet tells me I’m wrong, and here’s why, that I’ll be as receptive and respectful and take their arguments as seriously as all the 40-year-olds I told were wrong when I was 14 did.

Part of the reason I’m reluctant to make the kind of disclaimer I feel I need is that I’m afraid it’ll destroy this meritocratic dynamic. Once you make explicit the “young and inexperienced and humble” angle, can you then go right back to ye ol’ meritocracy, without people taking you less seriously, either by giving your ideas less weight and thought than before or by precisely giving your ideas weight and thought and actually giving you a break for being “young and inexperienced and humble”? I don’t know how old and experienced you need to be to reach that equilibrium where people will take you seriously and not question you simply because you’re young and inexperienced but also not give you unmerited authority simply because you’re old and experienced, and where people will not assume you’re either part of “the old guard” and so immune to change or part of “the youth” and so addicted to it. Thirty-three, on your second marriage, having worked seven years in your fourth full-time job, mortgage, kids, cat, dog, two cars? Twenty-two, but having spent the last four years traveling the world and the years before that meditating in a cave in Nepal? Sixty-eight and nearing retirement, a lifetime of love and hate and working experience and experience being unemployed and and and behind you? It’s tricky.

All of this wouldn’t matter if age and experience and knowledge were irrelevant. Of course, they aren’t. Ad Hominem is a fallacy of irrelevance. You suck, therefore you’re wrong is fallacious, because personal characteristics such as degree of personal suckage aren’t relevant to the question at hand. Sometimes personal characteristics are relevant: you can’t expect someone who’s never been to Nepal to have the same perspective on the country as someone who’s lived there for fifteen years, you can’t expect someone who’s been in love once and it was in junior high and by the way they aren’t even out of junior high to have the same perspective on love as someone who’s gone through a dozen long-term relationships and just recently finalized their divorce. Being taken seriously by people twice your age and with twice as much life experience does a lot to instill self-confidence and hubris in someone relatively young and inexperienced. The problem arises when that same person then starts talking about things that actually require twice their life experience, or at any rate twice the experience in one particular area that they possess; and, being that this is on the internet, when nobody knows of their relative inexperience and so takes their word seriously.

I want my disclaimer to effectively shut down anything that resembles talking out of your ass about things you know nothing about, while at the same time inducing people to take everything else, everything for which argumentum ad hominem really is a fallacy, as seriously as they did before the disclaimer. I try, naturally, not to speak of things I lack the necessary perspective to accurately describe, but, you know us humans, right?We can’t help but have opinions on stuff, regardless of our relative authority on the subject. Being an occasional keyboard warrior/jockey/scholar is a disease that, I suspect, affects close to one hundred percent of the population.

How about this. Let’s mutually pretend we’ve reached that happy equilibrium where we’re comfortable calling each other out for talking out of our respective asses, but otherwise respect each other enough to let the arguments rather than the personal characteristics determine our evaluations of the other’s opinions, and where we assign neither negative nor positive predetermined “authority” to each other. So you’re a scientist? Great, but citation needed, scientist or not. So you’re barely 13? Great, but you provided citations, so you can hang anyway. Sound good?

[freigaeist]

also a random question but - favourite ship, if you have one?

ANJA

VMON ; the fashionistas, the earth signs, the teacher and his student, the refreshingly buzz of wild thoughts swirling through the organized mind whAT IS NOT TO LOVE ABOUT VMON!!! i can’t even say what is the most adorable abt those two but i think i’m drawn to how surprisingly similar they are but also how utterly different? whilst they’re both care-taker namjoon is the mental support, he’s incredibly good with words and verbal reassurance whereas taehyung can make anybody feel at ease with just a smile or a hand on the shoulder. whilst the older is gifted with just the right words in any situation the younger has that feeling to him that puts others at ease immediately; like a puppy you pet and feel better though it’s a small creature that needs you to take care of them and guide them you feel oddly accepted, protected, loved and taken care of by a huge grin, lots of spit and scratch marks on your hands and the feeling of their fur underneath your trembling fingers and that is taehyung. namjoon on the other hand is the words of an elder, a friend, a mother that do more than every physical support could do for you at that very moment. namjoon is the voice reading you a bedtime story that lulls you to sleep from very far away while taehyung is the bass soothingly vibrating beneath your head whilst being pressed close to his warm body. i imagine namjoons fingers are always kinda cold and at their best luke warm or hot and sweaty and taehyung seem to be always very warm and dry. namjoon get headaches from worrying too much and nibbling on his inner cheek in thoughts, taehyung has already moved from the foggy slumber of the past, got rid of the muddy finger prints on his white vest and is with one foot already in the newly fallen snow of the future, in his chest already bubbling excitement and aticipitation. vmon are the lecturing but kind words of an older person guiding and the younger reaching out and holding them in their steady embrace for a while knowing that even the wisest and oldest need nothing but a hug and a thankful smile from time to time.

so vmon is like the Ship of the Month but c’mon we all know bea HAS to have sidehoes (Me, A triple-biased Ship Wreck, ) so i’ll go in detail abt the others too fuck it why not:

JinMin ; ah yes sag+libra, they’re the kinds of sweets that look innocent and taste sweet and nice on first bite before some nasty kind of lemon STINGS into your tongue and you reconsider ever eating candy again bc how dare the sugar&sweets industry foaling you like this??? jinmin is this; effing libra park jimin being the cutest but also the most cunning out there, he KNOWS how to act and how to behave to have people liking him - but that doesn’t work when the person he’s trying to lull in acts like an actual 5y/o that just. isn’t having it. nopedy nop nope. this bangtan bomb is still everything to me bc i think their individual relationship comes out wonderfully as well as this vlive - truth be told both are reasons why my life improved 10% overall am not kidding. seokjin is the bigger brother chim never had and jimin the younger jin never had i think their sense of humour is rly similar (name one time when jimin pressured himself NOT to laugh at jins antics!), they’re the Gossip Girls out of these bunch of boyscouts and i love them for that! whenever one of them is whispering into the others ear it looks extra shady if you ask me &I LOVE IT! jimin sometimes looks so extra Done with Jin and he just continues going on his nerves like it’s a water slide &I LVOE IT! i also love how seokjin is older but let’s jimin (and everybody else) just have their ways from time to time, he isn’t too serious when he doesn’t needs to be and i think that puts the others at ease. they’re also Team Touchy though i’d say jimin is more of the physical support than jin bc jimin isn’t one to be all sappy with words but rather shows his concern and that he senses someone’s upset with simple, reassuring gestrues. he doesn’t play around like jin does when he’s bored or is all clingy and is glued to people like taehyung but he got his ways in immediately being close and having a hand on ones shoulder when they’re worried and i actually think jin learned a bit from chim when it comes to this? i mean yes he’s The (so claimed) Mom but he isn’t overly touchy but with the youngsters he is and i find that rly cute! they’re on one wave and the wave’s wild and high enough to happily sail on it :’^) i also read this lovely yet absolute heart-breaking (in the possibly best way) masterpiece and fell in love instantely

others i’m all HEART EYES for

Sope ; who isn’t in love with yoonseok. honestly. the pisces boy and his water bearer. when yoongi’s the deep dark water growing heavy and deadly hoseok is lightning buzzing through the halfway frozen surface, cracking ice and bringing light into the darkness which the water reflects in every direction to light it up. when hobi is all twitching nerves and fluid anxiety (and he’s all nerves to me; even when he’s talking in a quiet/low voice to calm ppl he’s talking incredibly FAST and his voice literally dances up&down he is just. A BUNDLE OF NERVES HE’S SUCH AN AQUARIAN) yoongi is reassuring deepness and calm and when yoongi’s depressed and without any motivation and everything and everyone is choking him to death and he feels like drowing hoseok is his light, oxygen and soul food. they’ve that super healthy relationship where they magically balance their downsides out smh?? that’s how i see them. they’re offering what the other is lacking and by that make a very strong unit. plus yoongi is really straight-forward and honest but he’s not one who’s all lovey dovey and shows how much he cares too obvious BUT WITH HOB HE IS EXACTLY THAT!!! i just rly love them but then again, who doesn’t?

Taejin ; Team Agegap - mhh both have a similar but different feeling to me but it’s all pure. they let jin be the child and are sUPER ANNOYED BY HIM sometimes when he wants to play around and they don’t want to! Seokjin is absolutely in love with taehyung (but then again who isn’t) and they can gET INCREDIBLY TOUCHY (possesive bf Tae at it everywhere, their mama stage??) with each another! plus the one and only thing i ever wrote is taejin lol for jinkook, i love that seokjin has that ability to lower himself. he’s the oldest and jeongguk the youngest yet i think they’re very close in the sense that jin is lowering himself and jeongguk likes to play the know-it-better& mess with his oldest hyung at times so they’re almost equal (plus team muscle pigs yay). these three are a bunch of pre-schoolers i wouldn’t want to take care of (am kidding pls pls let me play around with them!)

Double Wings ; Smol & Tol - namjin were the first that got me into reading bts fanfics (our sometimes tired, sometimes overly enthusiastic but 90% of the time emBARRASSING parents who gave the word Awkward its meaning (not bc they’re awkward with each other hell they’ve one of the best relationships you can have with someone who you’re not similar to in lots of ways), are absolutely, undeniably in el oh ve eh with each other), namjoon as the motivated, strict person that want and wants and wants and seokjin the actual fire sign telling the earth sign to CHILL for a second or two.. they just get me lots. minjoon is just. pure love. one of the least physical members and one of the touchiest, the smallest bundle that has his shell perfectly under control and the tallest that has everything but control over his long, slender limbs, don’t they make a nice meet&greet of opposites i love it!

and last but not least: Taeguk ! my sweet summer children, the youngest and most playful, partners in crime! they have your chest aching and heart longing for a soulmate you don’t know yet but want to have by your side already, they’re a refreshing summer breeze when you’re out in the midst of an autumn storm and they just give me that supper fuzzy, warm and very soft feeling inside where i either want to put them to bed and read them a bed time story of be out with them in the middle of a hot summer night, ripping out trees and yelling until it echoes to the moon and back. taehyung is warmth and steadiness when jeongguk is anxious and unsure, he’s an older brother that doesn’t mind playing the younger for a while and jeongguk is obviously the touchiest with taehyung (no surprise as taehyung IS the touchiest himself lol). i think the most fics i read (it’s not many but if i start one that i love i will read 20k in one go) is taeguk just bc it’s rly popular (which is understandable if you ask me?) and many talented ppl fell in love with them! 

shoutout to 2seok & jikook for being underrated in their brother-like, more quiet charms and sugamon for putting up with one another for such a long time so they practically grew on one another, sugakookie where an Intro Big shows an Intro Smol that it’ll be okay being like this in an extroverted idol world AND vmin & namseok for being the typical same age liners where one of the “twins” constantely states “i’m like 2minutes older rESPECT ME YOU LITTLE SHIT!”

bangtan is one family and i love all their friendships/dynamics but those are my faves :’^) in the end nobody stans bts as much as taehyung bts anyways, right? THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME WASTE MY TIME I LOVED THIS

#people be asking me what kinda cheese i favor #i'll answer abt three different kinds how they were made the history abt where it came from #including 5 fun facts abt each sort where one of them miraculously ends up being a creepy pasta #and the other turns into life advice on bad breath?? #anja you were lying when you said i have my thoughts collected #i'm all over the palce looki at this mess #but i love going deep on simple stuff and turning big issues into flies :^/ #answered #anja <3 #ksjknj #also feel always free to tag me in any kinda precious interaction regardless which member lol #i'm just loving the love and brotherhood!