#im trying to hope for the best but its so hard

[brosif40]

.

#i might lose lilah tonight #i dont know what happened but she started having seizures and now she wont get up #i have no way to get to an emergency vet either and no money so im completely helpless and i hate it so much #i just got her back #i can't fucking lose her for real this time #im terrified #i cant do this #i cant live without her #i really cant #i should've caught on sooner i wish i did #i couldn't even spend a couple of days of her being back #if she does go ill be inactive for a bit (ill probably be inactive anyways since i dont want to take my eyes off of her at all #so no sleep #im trying to hope for the best but its so hard #i feel so powerless

[squidpedia]

How are you doing nowadays?

thank you to my friends for being super patient with me right now, i dont say it enough but thank you and i appreciate you

#its finals season and like. hoping for a calm summer! #asks #pedias sona #pedia says stuff #i am not burnt out butttt if im not careful it does feel like im close? #so im trying my best to take care and not push myself too hard

[iftitah]

.

#the more i stay around people the more i want to become like them out of spite #because i was so surprised these people are at least 24-26 years age some even did a minor bachelor's before coming here #some have completed post grad and then joined #like aren't you all too fucking old to act that immature #i grew so resentful of everyone how they keep on doing the worst low man shit and then victimize themselves #hypocrites full of shit they don't want to hear the truth #i know no one has the audacity to take a fight with me on here because they know im the youngest here #not because im the youngest but because im better #the girls frown upon me because i don't hear their low mindset humorless jokes and pointo out where they fall short #oh [my irl name] youre so stiff hamesha kami kyun nikalti rahti ho hamesha baat kaatne ki aadat hai learn to take a joke #mazaak hi to kar rahe hain kya yaar #ive cried so many times because i feel suffocated here and out of hate i want to act immature selfish hypocrite too so i do #i become self centered and look into my needs #but everyday bcg shows me how one stays firm in mindset even amidst surrounding of shit people #he points out to me all the time when i start acting like them he says why aren't you trying to rise above #i say ham bhi karte hai na unn chutiyon jaisa behave kyunki unhe unhi ki language mei samajh aata hai #achha ban kar honest banne se kuch nahi milta yaha #but he knows his stuff #he never does these things #however much i let evil thoughts take upon i get astounded everyday how he's practicing his rightful his honesty even tho no one's looking #it makes me want to cry #i hope he gets so ahead in life i hope he stands at the podium one day on a stage and deliver speeches where people actually can see him #like he sees the orator that come to attend our unis gatherings and says everytime kuch to baat hoti hai inn logon mei #i hope he achieves whatever he wants i hope he gets ahead of everyone all this fucking corruption #its not that he's done anything that im applauding he tries his best #and maybe teachers see that too all in class they're only looking at him and teaching they know #do you know how fucking hard it is not get corrupted in this uni and become one of those assholes that have done things unimaginable #im inspired everyday ill try my best to be like him #i do not just want to praise him i want to become someone he doesn't have to say fir tum bhi vahi karogi to kya farq reh jaayega #kuch bada nahi hota logon ki roz roz ki choti choti aadaton se pata chal jaata hai vo kaise hain

[luck-of-the-drawings]

"You'll never drown if you keep swimming.." very nice words to hear after the stressful ordeal of making a deal with the devil! I REALLY LOVE JAY FERIN. when shes not carrying the team in battle shes very much carrying more emotional luggage than others seem to give her credit for. im cheering for her! go girl, go get the team together!

#jrwi fanart #jrwi riptide #jrwi show #jrwi riptide spoilers #BWUHH SO I FINISHED THIS ONE RECENTLY ACTUALLY #IT WAS ROTTIN IN MY WIPS FOREEEVERRRRR GWUHHH IM SO HAPPY TO SET IT FREE #I HAD SUUUCH A HARD TIME WITH THE GODDAMN HANDS HERE.... #IF U THINK THAT LOOKS GOOD THEN U BETTER BELIEEEEVE I BLED FOR IT!!!! #IN other news tho #chips sad boy arc!! i loooved seeing him get all sad n self hating. sayin hes not a good friend or a good pirate or AAAA #baby gorl..... i think its neat to see characters that normally try their best to build themself up soo much finally crumble #i liked seeing the Bastard Title finally get to him. and i like how hes acting after getting thru that arc! #like on one hand hes actin like sooo much more of a baby lately but its like. thats just how he stands up for himself. yknow? #the HEY. BE NICE! sorta stuff. LOVE that for chippy like yeeeess baby girl tell ur friends that they hurt ur feelings #what else can i say here.... NIKLAUS. OUH. OUHH MY GOD NIKLAUS I LOVE HIM SOOO MUCH #I LOVE HOW HE TALKS TO JAY I HOPE THEY CAN TALK MORE IN THE FUTURE... godddd i jus wanna see him again.......... #anywyay thats all my thoughts im gonna go obsess over prime defenders again baaaaiiiiiii #IF YOU SAW A TYPO NO U FUCKIN DIDNT

[dayurno]

the worst first date ive ever been to was with a goth girl who took me (tennis skirt collector) to this underground goth club with the most anti autistic flashing lights ever and we smoked a joint together and i genuinely thought i was seeing hallucinations on the dance floor. then her friends and her drank a bucket of alcohol essentially and her friend started throwing up in the bathroom while i very sadly apologized for needing to leave (because i was hallucinating) and we kissed goodbye as her friend retched with the lung capacity of an airplane engine. i heard the album the entire night was about five minutes before. anyway kandrew

#kevin: sorry im having hallucinations :( nicky retching so hard he coughs blood: #and then i had the best uber driver ever on my way back so i guess things were meant to be #hmmm let me see. neil was kevins uber driver. (nodding sagely) #it was not my first time trying weed but it was my first time smoking in essentially a goth torture chamber #full of people dancing in strange and peculiar ways #i love the goths i believe in their beliefs but it was then i realized i did not have what it takes #and it was UNDERGROUND I CANT STRESS THIS ENOUGH. we were under the ground. it Felt like we were underground #andrew: its really underneath the ground kevin: wow :) #it was so awful all around even though she was so nice about it 😭😭😭🤏 #miss dani if youre out there im sorry your friends were nice i hope their band works out #im going to a gig as soon as i remember what it was called

[yuukimiyas]

‧˚₊( ˶ ⁰∀⁰)‧˚₊ happy friyay!! i hope everyone had a v great tgiving & are ready for a fresh new day!! ꒰ ¨̮ ꒱⸝♡ i work all day today but im gonna try my hardest to catch up w stuff!! ilyasm!! see ya later!!

#ᕱ⑅ᕱ.* journals! #sorry i wasnt on sm yesterday :// my tgiving was…a lot…lmaosnsj ૮꒰ྀི ´∩∩` ꒱ྀིა but im excited for a brand new day!!! <33 #i work w the public & its blk friday so im not sure how busy i’ll be!! theres at least 6 fics im DYING to read today so i hope i can!!! #also trying to think of a possible lil ship name for kaeya & i hehee ૮꒰っ´༥'ς꒱ bc i have fallen HARD for him!! like!!! eeeep!!!! <333 #ily ily ily!! im so happy you’re here & i hope your friday is the v best!!! your faves & i are smotherin you in smooches as we speak! MWAH!

[opens-up-4-nobody]

OCD is pretty common among autistic people, and many of us who dont have full-on OCD may experience some things that can be kinda similar to some aspects of it. I'm on the spectrum myself and i also have this issue of basically getting stuck on some thoughts. It sucks, sometimes it's something that makes me angry but doesnt actually matter that much in the grand acheme of things and i just end up in a bad mood over something stupid and cant stop thinking abt it for a few days even though there are no new thoughts about it, i just keep going through old ones again and again and again. I dont know if there's a term for it, but hey, at least I'm not the only one, and neither are you. Generally i just look for distractions and wait until the thoughts get less obsessive and annoying

That makes sense, thanks!

#logically i kno theres a spectrum of experience from autistic restrictive and repetitive behavior to full on ocd and im an ecologists so i #kno natrue does not give a damn abt human boxes and labels but unfortunately if u give me a set of labels i will obsessively try to parse #out what fits into what best and it drives me nuts. which is probably part of why i fall into the 0cd side of things. all of my thoughts #tend to b looping a repetitive and it makes me freak the fuck out lol. im also supposed to ground myself and move on which is hard to do #rn i think abt ice floating down a channel. floating down the northwest passage bc im again an obsessional freak #but that seems to help a bit lowering my distress. i need to pull myself out of my own head and into the present. mindfulness as my #therapist would say. and im trying but its hard and i hate it lol. eventually itll get easier tho. one hopes at least #to b fair im way more chill abt this categorical debate than parsing whether or not im bip0lar lol bc that comes with meds #and im spectacular at talking myself out of medication and i kno that and the doctors kno that but they dont say it directly and im like bro #its fine i kno what ur thinking and ur right but also im insane in a way that makes me ridiculously well informed so im a disaster #i walk in like im colaborating on a research project which tbh is probably a good thing bc i hold all the info #unrelated

[cryptids]

re: the situation here, the supreme court is gonna be announcing their decision tomorrow on whether to declare the mining contract illegal/unconstitutional (actually its a bit more complicated bc they'll be repealing a specific law, but to keep it understandable lmao) which would then give justification for it to be voided. first quantum minerals will likely try to sue our government if that happens, but that'll be the next problem to deal with and people would rather know our representatives actually convey the population's will at the very least lmfao. but if the court doesn't give the decision people want to hear then shit will definitely kick off for at least a few days.

also the canadian embassy have refused to get involved at all or even give a statement, and won't respond to anyone, but it doesn't surprise me whose side the canadian government is on 🤡

this was the crowd outside the supreme court this afternoon though

#🐊 #god i really am hoping for the best but the corruption is just so so so bad here #even within the supreme court too #im also a bit worried abt potential riots etc. if it's bad news bc the police will start escalating shit immediately #but im also gonna be so angry its gnna take some willpower not to be outside smashing car windows and shit myself jsdfjgsdgfsdgj #this whole situation has felt so frustrating bc its like the panamanian population right now are the only thing standing in the way of such #mass scale destruction of the rainforest (not to mention the exploitation colonialism and everything else) and so many people have been #trying so hard in struggles against both this company and our government #but we're such a small country and its like nobody cares about us

[sorikkung]

people interacting w wgoin in my notes... this would be a rly bad time to say all my writing will probably be on hiatus for the indefinite future huh

#not like it makes a practical difference considering i only upload twice a year at best #but im realising how much my writing is shame motivated and its just not sustainable or healthy #it saddens me that these stories i invested So much time and effort into will probably never get finished #i wanna hold out hope that they will but #i dont want anyones expectations to be too high #bc knowing myself they probably wont #i started wgoin thinking that this would be the story i commit to finishing and not just abandon as soon as i get bored #but that was before i had really realised how my brain works #and for a while writing these chapters have felt very forced #gbgb had a much better run till it crashed and i was just unable to pick it back up #tbh that one could potentially still be saved bc of how open ended it is if i get any inspo for it back whatsoever #bc it had no strict plan i was entirely making it up as i go #and im realising thats how i write best. i tried to plan wgoin so id commit to finishing it but im realising that has the opposite effect #if i plan anything too thoroughly writing it becomes like gnawing on lead #cause i got all the dopamine out of the idea already #i write best when i have nothing but a vague idea or a vibe #gbgb crashed bc i ran out of vibes and ideas but if i find any again who knows #there is the possibility where i scrap the plan i had for wgoins entire plot and make the rest up as i go #which i might try purely bc i love the story sm #and i think i enjoyed writing it most back in the first three parts where i Was making it up as i went #which is why im saying indefinite hiatus instead of discontinued #bc there is hope for them. just not. much #so if u stick around maybe follow me on ao3 if u dont wanna see all my posts n just my stories #maybe in 3 years time youll see another wgoin notif or sumn #sorry to the small but dedicated handful of readers who really loved these fics #i wanted to write more for you guys bc ik its hard to find this kinda fic anywhere else; its why i started writing it #but i am but one unmedicated autist w severe adhd. we r working on the unmedicated part tho #ive learned so much abt how my brain functions now n how to make the most of it tho #i told myself id finish any new writing before i post it. so know anything new Will be complete :3 #mischiefing time

[autisticlee]

having some sort of chronic pain and tiredness issue and joint problems and whatnot but not knowing exactly what the problem is is really good at leading you feeling like you're faking it or making a big deal out of nothing or making it up. especially if there's a good day where it's not as bad and you can walk straight without limping for the first time in a year. but then you can wake up the next day and can barely walk and wonder why you can't just walk normal. it's hard to not guilt trip yourself into dealing with pain by trying to ignore it and force yourself to walk "normal" all the time

#chronic pain #chronic exhaustion #idk what else to tag #another day of why was lee walking normal and barely pain at work yesterday but then today so much pain and exhausted #wish i knew what was exactly the problem. was diagnosed with “generalized hypermobility” but doesnt do much #not a real diagnosis. basically just a thing to tell me “theres nothing wrong. exercise more” but how???? i keep trying but hurt myself #my job is physical labor and therefore exercise. it hurts. is exhausting. no energy to do more. walking is exhausting #have to focus so much energy on not popping hips out of place and twisting knees and ankles and falling. never hurts less #still think about how failed the heds test by 1 point but had several people with heds or who have close friends/family with it who told me #they think i have it and should go het diagnosed or just ask me if i have it because they recognize the symptoms #and every time i tell them the doctor i saw about my joint issues and stuff denied it they get super confused and tell me to try #another doctor. unfortunately i have to go through my designated health system and they dont have multiple doctors of each specialty #and i in general have no clue how to navigate health stuff or how to advocate for myself and have no help or support system at all so 🤷 #anyway. it makes me wonder if i *do* have that or if my floppy bendy joints are just similarly bad and exercise will cure me #and im just bad at it because i have no clue what is right and wrong movement unless someone watches me and corrects me the whole time #and no i wont learn or get better. im so disconnected from this body that i will never learn what feels right and wrong. #still cant even tell when im hungry until i almost pass out!!!!!!! of thirsty!! or even have to pee until its emergency level piss!!!!!! #so no way to tell when hypermobiling joints when exercising or when form is slipping and not correct anymore. #been trying things to get better at that but still hasnt improved at all #what was i talking about......right. dont think ill ever get heds diagnosis since cant pass the test for that. so cant get much support/help #am on my own with youtube tutorials and hoping i dont keep hurting myself wishing exercise will cure me and “good days” become permanent #also why are video tutorials SO HARD TO FOLLOW AND LEARN FROM. im sk bad at it yet everyone tells me its the best and only way to learn but #its SO HARD FOR ME 😭😭😭😭😭 MAKES ME SO FRUSTRATED AND UPSET

[strwbrymlkshake]

I am trying so hard but it still isn't ENOUGH FOR YOU? DON'T YOU SEE HOW HARD I'VE BEEN TRYING?

#mine #normally i've been good about not being too upset over things #but oh fucking boy. okay. im glad people are scared of me #i hope they know that im the only right one in the whole world and they are wrong and are justified for fearing me and im glad my existence #will turn them off from sharing their wrong opinions. but oh FUCKING BOY? ive been sitting here the whole time like oh they hate me #oh they hate me so much they want me to die wahhh and im trying to do all the things they like because im for some reason fucking bothered #by their other opinions. even though the people themselves are useless trash #and oh. like i was suspecting it but its finally confirmed huh??? you all cant fucking stand the sight of me because im right? #you dont understand the truth?? they hated him because he told them the truth? thats me as fuck rn dude #i am literally gracing your eyes with the content i make and basically hand feeding you the correct opinions to have #and yet you still reject them! people just love being stupid unfortunately. i want to kill them all. #i would be so much nicer if you all just agreed with me on the objective truth but unfortunate you have to be stupid #i have graced you with so many GIFTS and protected you from my wrath so many times but you do not even give a fuck #WHY AM I CRYING. YOU ARE ALL SO USELESS WHY AM I CRYING!!! MAYBE ITS BECAUSE YOU DONT AGREE? #i guess im crying because they are all so stupid #so what im saying is its very unfortunate that everyone does not worship me and all my opinions and the world is very hard. yes. #friendship ended with self hatred now delusions of grandeur are my new best friend #even trhing to explain myself makes me sound like a shithead but i swear to fuck if you all just listened to me like youre supposed to #then absolutely nothing would ever go wrong! but you all had to be stupid on purpose! do you like being wrong? whats your problem #explaining all the reasons im RIGHT and yet i still feel bad for having the gall to do so. i shouldnt feel bad. im doing great. youre just #uncomfortable in the fact that YOURE wrong and making me have to accomodate you for your wrongness? tf is that about #okay lunatic rant over i have finished crying ☝️

[kellystar321]

.

#periodical life updates #man the second artfight ends someone remind me to start working on my selfship blog FOR REAL. i keep putting it off but i have so many #things to post about my little f/os oguhg </3 wanna make it look all pretty first and draw all the little things for it :> #anyway hi happy artfight!! my drawing tablet broke </3 im working on attacks with my sib's tablet. i am trying very hard. #i have some things queued to post though its mostly easy things and things i already had tags for in my drafts #im so. tired. feeling a little inadequate because it feels like i cant keep up with anything. im behind on af attacks and talking to people #and my queue and sht (i have so many drafts) and i want to do everything and im gwaughhh that i cant #but i know its just ''dont trust anything after 9 pm'' thoughts. im doing well. im making progress. i literally made a spreadsheet and can #visibly track the progress im making. im working on 25+ attacks. im trying. i give myself a lot of work and im doing my best #almost 4 am oh no! still gotta brush my teeth; thats why im still awake really otherwise id be snork mimimi-ing it up <3 #changed my discord avatar to an attack my friend moss drew for me <3 its of my boy stickers i love him!! #tomorrow im gonna work on a background for one of my animated pieces maybe <3 #hm... do i have any other updates... man i guess thats it :P #i love you <33 hope you're all well <3

[discoidal]

ate a burger and fries and a liter of coke and it was so good and i was so sick and so sad that briefly i. u know what im not gonna make a joke abt americans i just want yall to know that we can make it if we have burger on our side

#next week ill try this new vegan vegetarian place that opened near campus i hope its good #mason jar salads are a gamechanger for dorm life btw. dressing on the bottom meats and hard veggies on top and then leafies on top for maxi #um crunch and freshness i ate the same salad two days in a row and it was still good and crunchy<3333 also grapes in salads are the best #also candying walnuts is easier than i thought and theyre so good #i like cooking #im debating whether to bake smth for my fav classes at the end of the sem especially since one prof is hosting a party #except its like 30-50 ppl per class so i prob shouldn't commit to that or should at least bake smth small and transportable #since i dont have a kitchen or oven or anything in the dorm. maybe like tiny cookies or smth idk ?? hmmz

[todayisafridaynight]

I genuinely can never thank you enough for the past year. I can't express how much it's meant to me to be understood and have my energy reciprocated with someone on the same wavelength. Although I've been in the fandom for quite a bit longer than most people writing in, and longer than you, even, I can't remember the last time I felt this welcome and motivated. A TRULY embarrassing amount of my work's just been fueled by "oh Snap's gonna wanna see that," and of course that circle's expanded since then, but it probably wouldn't have had I not met stream chat through you, aaaaaand if I'm honest you're still up there... lol...

It's always, always a highlight of my day to see your your work, your posts, and your responses, whether they're to me or to others, and it's always a highlight of my week to be able to make it to streams! You're a huge inspiration for me, particularly in terms of your work ethic across the board. I always come out of streams energized and feeling like I can actually finish things, and usually this is hubris, but it's gotta count for something.

Not to be dramatic, but you kinda changed my life, no exaggeration. I still really can't see myself the way I was two or three years ago not just calling it quits after some of my Gaiden experiences... lol... but I'm still around, and like always, I wanna be able to write in and interact as much as I used to sometime soon. Thanks for everything! I hope RGGS continues to deliver so we can stay in touch :3

i cant thank YOOOOU enough for the past Xsome months or so. feelins ABSOLUTELY mutual in that i wasnt sure anyone else would really be into talkin bout rgg as you and i have (or would be willing to read my. miles-long scrolls of bullshit LMAO) so it's been real fun gettin to know you an everyone and chattin !!

most bafflin thin to ever to think i have good work ethic, i feel like ive been behind everyone for the past couple weeks and even with the things i do make it's really not up to snuff. it's always nice to hear that's not supposedly exactly the case :) I Suppose :^)

rgg community (like any community lbr) can be. An Experience, esp for someone with a position like yours. so im glad i can make it worth to hang around somewhat LOL

regardless, i always look forward to you next ask or the next time you leave tags on a post i make. if i ever bother making a post again ☠️☠️

#fave #snap chats #I DID SIT ON THIS ALL DAY OOPS #i got a bit busy with some stuff...... also i always try my best to write a sufficient response cause ill feel bad if i dont </3 #mad funny youre stoked for me to see stuff And I Am Always Stoked To See Stuff cause i got a similar sentiment towards you #i mean i TRYYYY not to get too in my head bout it since then i get paranoid but i always do hope on the downlow like #'ah man. hope this is funny. hope masu likes it. hope im shot for this one' VERY NORMAL things to want :) #so funny tho. funny timin of this ask i feel like ive been disappointin people an particularly yous #which 'snap that doesnt make sense please be happy with yourself for three seconds' which. NO?? no. impossible #but i do get worried im disappointing or being too annoying or yk. just being a pest or not being adequate #so it's fun/ny gettin this ask today all that considered LOL #I MEAN I KNOW EVERYONE BEEN NICE THE PAST DAY OR SO YK SO NO REASON TO THINK IT #i cant avoid thinkin a it... my number one bully is myself he Will Not leave me alone no matter how hard i try to complain to the board #the board also bein myself. i cant excommunicate myself from myself-- #REGARDLESS. very cool that i give you motivation :) esp after streams :) #every time i finish a stream i feel like i made an ass out of myself. ALWAYS HAVE FUN. but i feel at the cost of bein obnoxious #tho i guess theres no point stayin round if i was. lest its like Last Resort kinda deal then TRULY i am sorry im The Last Resort #ILL STOP WHINING FOR FIVE SECONDS TO SAY thank you :) for everythin :) both just chattin with me an all the work you do for the community #it truly is a lot and indescribable and its very cool i have someone like that who likes what i do. you do be the beyonce in walmart to me #to reference that post i rb'd last night LOL its still hard for me to understand but ig i dont have to understand it #i think i mentioned this before but i remember when id draw for persona (cringe ik) id mostly draw adachi (this is relevant Trust) #and this one mate one day was just 'snap its really nice how much. love you bring to the adachi community' #which is a hilarious thing to say since adachi sucks but POINT IS im glad i. i THINK im kinda doing the same thing now still #thats the consensus ive gotten the past couple asks.. lol.. its nice bringin people together and havin a fun and welcomin space :) #ILL WRAP IT UP HERE THO before i make people throw up. i kept this ask hoarded long nuff.. ill just hoard it in my chest cavity instead #once more thank you forever and always :) when we inevitability branch off to other things i'll always treasure all you've done for me

[piplupod]

.

#i think it is because i am so desperate and miserable probably #but i just really wish i knew why i am not likeable fjfkdl #i feel like there is something so obvious that im oblivious to somehow. and everyone else sees it and hates it #and i just. cant figure it out #i feel like im one of those hateful bigots who cry abt how nobody likes them and its so obvious why nobody likes them #i hope I'm not that. but maybe i am idk. i cannot figure it out and im just really tired of trying and failing w ppl #fumbling every attempt to make friends #theres ppl being v nice to me on a sideblog where I've been sharing art and stuff and I'm just constantly waiting for me to fuck it up #and then they will realize whatever it is about me that puts everyone off. and i will lose the chances of friendship. #im so scared and tired. i just want to understand what im doing wrong so i can fix it and be better and be likeable #idk i think there is just smth inherently wrong within me. im off putting somehow. there is smth festering at my core maybe #and everyone else can just /sense/ it. and i am trying so hard to be good at socializing and friendships but i somehow fumble it always #i just wish i knew what it was that im doing wrong #or like... if its smth inherent within me I'd also like to know so i can just accept it finally and move on #argh idk this is so pathetic probably but i am just so frustrated w myself tonight #im just constantly waiting for me to somehow mess things up w the nice ppl in my life rn and be left without that again #and im not doing anything to self sabotage even!! im just treading very carefully!! and trying my best to be good!! #but it seems to always go wrong somehow like ppl just... pull away #idk. i feel so terrified that it's so obvious whats wrong w me and im just not seeing it #i keep trying to look but i cannot see what it is so idk !! i keep looking!! i dont understand !!

[bonescribes]

satan has ruined me im thinking so hard abt yuki's second trc verse

#❀ ooc . #i hope everyone on the planet is ready for me to throw this at them #I MEAN JUST THIGNK #ur yukito. living ur best life #suddenly ur little sister figure and her bf die #suddenly ur pulled away from ur only other support in the world #travelling across universes #THE ANGST POTENTIAL MILORD !!! #especially because its fucking YUKITO #he would try to hard to keep up that smile. try so hard to keep moving forward #i truly think he would remain a gentle positive force despite all of this #BUT THAT HURTS SO MUCH #(also i think his anxiety would escalate to be MUCH worse aha aha ha) #im about to make so many hc posts ur not even ready