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#im not going to get into it because im too tired but my god
hwaslayer · 2 days
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favorite things | pmylm drabble (jyh)
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⇢ favorite things - drabble one // ft. the pmylm couple
summary: yunho's been having a rough time adjusting to the 'real world' and gets upset when he can't have the person he needs the most right away.
words: 2.8k
warnings: cussing/mature language, jealousy/insecurities, yuyu is upset and doesn't really know how to control his feelings rn cause he is just a tired boy 😭, a small lil fight, the awkward silent treatment, yuyu and yeo talk thru his feelings for a bit, kissing/making out, sorry if i missed anything i quickly whipped the rest of this in bed lol
a/n: whipped this baby up because i just felt the need to and i missed my babies!! (+ this lil IG inspo hehe) more drabbles to come 🫶🏼 love you in slow motion update this weekend annnnd i’m gonna have to push back the fallen angel hwa fic cause im all over the place 🥹 but we’ll do better!! lol stay tuned!!
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Yunho has entered the real world and he is exhausted. When his mom used to joke about living and working in this so-called real world, he used to think it was just a thing to keep him on his toes, shake him up a little bit.
Nope, that shit was all real.
And he hates it.
He hates it because it's the one thing that brings another fight to the table for your relationship. Ultimately, Yunho knows all he has to do is adjust and he'll be fine in the long run. Both of you will be fine in the long run.
But today, that feels like a stretch and he is short of patience. Unusually short of patience than usual. He knows you don't mean any harm but for some odd reason, today he feels like the world is going to swallow him alive and everything is triggering.
The first thing is the fact that he has to stay a bit later than usual to finish up a project he had been working on. He was hoping to rush home and spend some time with you before you were off to practice for the evening, spending 2-3 hours with your friends and the group.
That didn't happen.
So, when he gets home and you've already texted him saying you've left with a sad, crying face, he's bummed. He gets himself comfortable anyway, heating up a cup of ramen since he's not too hungry. Maybe he'll get some food with you when you're out— it's one of his favorite things to do.
Now, the second thing that makes him a little more irked is the fact that 2-3 hours go by and you haven't texted. He knows practice can run long, but it's also a little unusual for you to not keep him updated. You finally do a bit past 8pm with a quick:
you: hi baby, sorry! practice was a bit busy, i was caught up during breaks. i'll be home soon then i'll come over after i shower, okay? wait for me (: we should go on a food run! hehe
yunho: sounds good, love. i'll be here.
It closes to 9pm and Yunho isn't hungry anymore. The cup of ramen will do since there seems to be a dim chance of getting food with you, especially when you tell him you'll be over in a quick second but you’re still nowhere to be found. Yunho charges to the door anyway and is hoping to greet you when he swings the door open. Instead, he's greeted with you laughing and giggling with Hyunjin downstairs in the lot as he hands you a bag of to-go food.
Let's set the record straight— Yunho loves your friends. He knows he can trust them, and he knows they're all genuinely good people. He's always been happy you had a good group of people around you.
It's just today, he really, really missed you. After a long ass day. And he knows you [and Hyunjin] mean no harm in your actions, but he can't help but feel a tad bit insecure [and slightly jealous] that you aren't rushing over to see him after not being with him all day. He knows he can blame this on the fact that he's exhausted and a little short on patience. God knows he really did try to keep it cool and brush it off.
He couldn't help it.
Yunho shuts the door again, leaving it unlocked for whenever you feel ready to come upstairs and hang out with him. He sits on his computer chair, irritated, and throws on a game to distract himself momentarily. Maybe it'll help ease whatever he's feeling,
But, nope.
It doesn't.
Because when you walk in, you're still yelling out to Hyunjin and whoever before you shut the door, place the food on the counter and walk into his room. You throw your arms around him from behind and Yunho lets out a small, audible sigh. That was already alarming enough for you, but you still dip your head to the side and try to grab his attention.
"Hi." You place a quick, chaste quick to his cheek, but Yunho doesn't move.
"Hey."
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing." Is all he says plainly. "I was just waiting for you."
"I know, but Hyunjin stopped by to give us food—"
"I thought we were gonna grab food together?"
"Oh." You frown because it completely slipped your mind, or else, you would've left the food at your own apartment to save it for tomorrow instead. "Fuck, I'm sorry. I didn't think he was gonna swing by with food. We all left each other earlier without any plans of—"
"It's okay." He taps your arms as a signal for you to let go of him. "You should go eat."
"We can share, there's more than enough—"
"All good." It's petty of Yunho, he knows. For him, it's the fact that you told him you wanted to go on a food run after practice. Another small, but meaningful thing you two did often. He doesn't blame Hyunjin for anything at all, no. There was no way of preventing that, and who the fuck was he to make you reject food from a friend?
He just wished he could take you to get food. Watch you order your favorites and do your happy dance in his passenger's seat. It's another one of his favorite things.
"Yunho." You slowly step aside and sit on his bed, your appetite all of a sudden gone from how distant your boyfriend is being. "I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to make you upset."
"It's fine."
"Is it really? Because something feels off and I wanna know what I did so I can fix it."
"It's nothing, Y/N." You almost flinch at the way he calls you your name instead of his cute endearing nicknames. It throws you off guard so much that you resort to a flimsy, broken:
"Okay." It's barely above a whisper. You stand to head back out to the kitchen, quietly eating a bit of Hyunjin's extra to-go thai food before setting some aside in a tupperware for Yunho and placing it in the fridge. The rest of the night goes.. like that.
In silence. With weird tension.
You hate it.
You wish you could just fix whatever you did wrong, or that Yunho would tell you no matter how 'silly' it may sound. He's always been so good with communicating, even during small disagreements, you weren't sure why he was avoiding it this time around.
You quietly get ready for bed, brushing your teeth and flossing before changing out of your sweats and hoodie to Yunho's shirt. You pad into the room, slipping yourself deep under the sheets and pull up some vlogs on Youtube that you need to catch up on.
"Tired?" Yunho asks from his computer chair, still playing his game.
"Mhm." You look at him, hoping he'd come over to kiss you, cuddle you. Shut off the computer and lay next to you, show you any kind of affection. He doesn't budge, though. You feel your bottom lip trembling, your heart slowly cracking in various places. You have to take a breath to prevent yourself from crying, and Yunho can feel it. He can feel your gaze on him, he can tell you're seconds away from crying. So, Yunho stands and shuts off his computer. But, he starts to head out to the living room and you're on the verge of breaking down. His way of avoiding the issue and getting more upset was to shut down. Deflect.
This wasn't like Yunho at all so you knew something was wrong; something was that bothersome to him.
"Baby." You call for him softly, and he just looks at you. You can tell he's conflicted between keeping this up and dropping it entirely, but it doesn't seem to be enough. It's not enough for him to drop it because his expression doesn't change. He still seems cold, distant. Tired. Unlike the Yunho you're so, so used to seeing and having.
"I'm just tired. Go to sleep."
"Where are you going?"
"The living room."
"Let me come with you."
"Y/N. Please go to sleep. I told you nothing was wrong." You watch the way his jaw slightly ticks before brushing you off completely and leaving the room, shutting the door behind him. A loud sigh escapes his lips as he treads to the couch and plops onto it, leaning his head back onto the edge. He shuts his eyes, giving himself some time to sort through his feelings because what the fuck, Jeong Yunho?
He knows this is much needed, though. He needed to step away for a second to regroup. He doesn't want to unintentionally hurt you by saying or doing things that he doesn't mean. He's tired, and he's acting like a fucking baby because he just wanted you at so many points today— yet, the universe just didn't let him have you. That wasn't your fault.
None of this was your fault.
He needed to do better. Just because he was exhausted, didn't mean he had to act this way towards you.
"Yo." Yeosang walks through the door, dropping his duffle bag to the floor as he steps out of his shoes. "You good?" He furrows his brows at the sight of Yunho just resting his head back with his eyes shut close.
"Mhm."
"Where's Y/N?"
"In the room." Odd, Yeosang thinks. It's not like you two to be separated like this. It's pretty obvious Yunho is bothered by something and that you've probably gotten into a small fight over it. Yeosang isn't one to meddle much, especially when it's not his business to. But, he is concerned seeing his roommate like this. It's probably one of the rare times he ever sees Yunho upset.
"You sure everything's okay? I'm not really used to seeing you sitting out in the living room in silence like this." Yunho lets out a tiny chuckle that's barely audible, but he finally turns to Yeosang and purses his lips.
"I guess. Just exhausted lately."
"I bet. You've been working your ass off." Yeosang looks into the fridge before stepping away with a cold water bottle and heading towards Yunho. "Y/N put some food in there for you, by the way."
"Did she?"
"Yeah. It has a little sticky note on top." Of course you did, why wouldn’t you? You always thought about Yunho no matter what.
"Fuck."
"What?"'
"I've been such a dick to her tonight."
"What'd you do?"
"It's so stupid." Yunho begins to explain how his day has just been all over the place— from work, to staying late and not being able to see you before practice, no updates until 3+ hours after practice, looking forward to a food run that didn't end up happening because of Hyunjin. All Yeosang can do is laugh a bit and shake his head.
"Dude, we all have bad days. It's inevitable. You're still adjusting so don't be so hard on yourself. It's hard going from a routine you were so used to, especially with Y/N. Then, having to switch it up and play tetris with your time. It's not easy. But also, I'm sure Y/N has been feeling the same way. She's just doing what she can to support you first and foremost. She'd never hurt you intentionally, and I know she'd always choose you in the end." Yunho's head drops as he leans onto his knees and sighs again.
"Fuck, you're right. I don't know why today was so difficult. I guess it all piled on for me and I didn't know how to sort through it."
"All good. Shit happens." Yeosang shrugs. "Anyway. I'm gonna head to bed. You should probably do the same. I know she's probably waiting for you."
"Thanks." Yeo gives him a little dap before he's off to get comfy and end his day. Yunho stays on the couch for a few more minutes before he brushes his teeth and washes up for bed. He stands in the bathroom for a few more seconds before gaining the courage to finally talk to you about everything that's been going on today. When he walks in, you're still bundled under the sheets, but your phone is against the wall and a video is playing. He can hear you sniffling through the video though, and he knows you've been crying.
God dammit, Yunho.
"Baby?" You hear Yunho softly call your name as he slips into bed and wraps his arms around you.
"Mhm?" You respond, still facing away from him.
"Can we talk?" You sigh and exit the video, locking your phone before turning towards Yunho and setting your phone onto the table.
"Don't force yourself if you aren't ready to."
"I am, and I'm sorry." He looks at you with those puppy dog eyes and it instantly feels like you have your loving, incredibly sweet and attentive boyfriend back.
"What happened?"
"I don't really know. To be honest, I don't have that great of an explanation. I was just tired and I was really looking forward to seeing you before practice. I couldn't see you then because of work, so I was even more excited to see you after practice and to go on our run together. But, you came later and the whole thing with Hyunjin—" He pauses and shakes his head. "It was so stupid and childish of me. I didn't need to act that way, and I'm so sorry I was such a dick to you over that." You cup his cheek and caress the surface with your thumb.
"You should've just told me, babe."
"It's so dumb, though?" He furrows his brows, mainly at himself.
"Nothing is dumb. Whatever hurts you, hurts me. We're in this together, remember? We're on the same team. I just need you to communicate and be honest, like you always tell me. Okay? I'll do anything to fix it and make it better. I'm your safe space like you are mine."
"I know." He leans into your touch before placing a soft kiss to your palm. "I'll do better."
"We have our bad days and that's okay. It won't make me love you any less. Tell me if you need space or if you need anything from me. I want you to be happy and comfortable."
"I know."
"Okay. And I'm sorry about the food run. I promise I'll keep my end of it next time."
"Wasn't your fault, baby. Nothing could have prevented that." You give him a tiny, toothless smile before kissing the tip of his nose.
"Are we okay?" He nods.
"I'm so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.” He repeats before leaning in to peck you on the lips. He holds the kiss before parting and looking you in the eye, brushing the hair away from your face. He dips in for another kiss— this time, it's deeper. More passionate. His hand comes down to the small of your back as he presses against you, slipping his tongue in to fight for dominance against yours. The kiss is so full of love and neediness, but there's no push or pressure to make anything out of it.
So, Yunho continues to kiss you. Pushing up against you ever so slightly while parting from your lips to leave a trail across your jaw.
Your chin.
Your neck.
Back up to your lips.
He loves the way you softly sigh in content, listening to him repeatedly whisper 'I love you' against your lips. Into your neck. Across your jaw. He loves the way you gently bite onto his bottom lip as a way of asking for more. He loves the way your fingers tug on the ends of his hair, the way you press your lips against his cheek, forehead, nose. The way you caress his cheeks and never let him go.
It's amongst the many on his list of favorite things.
He continues to coo you and praise you in between kisses throughout the night, smiling while hearing your giggles and smothering you with more kisses until you find yourself getting sleepy. He holds you close and sings a soft lullaby, playing with your hair as you drift off to sleep with the cutest smile on your face. He can’t help but admire you, fighting the exhaustion that’s been hitting him all week for a little longer. He fights it until he can’t anymore but fuck it, it’s all worth it.
Because sitting at the very top of his favorites list is you.
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⇢ permanent taglist: @asjkdk @bintificreads @interweab @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs
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icallhimjoey · 9 hours
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More!!! More!!!! More bookstore!joe! MORE!!!!!!!!!! we've seen his erratic behaviour when he visits the store after not having been able to come in for a while, but what about the visit before he knows he's not going to be able to come in for a while?
omg im so here for the bookstore!joe requests, but the "i already miss you even though youre still here" somehow turned into whatever this is... idk why i went where i went, my apologies, and tw for vomit Wordcount: 3K
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Lost Moments To Keep
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You hadn't stopped staring at Joe with the biggest eyes. You seemed confused and weirdly mesmerised. Your eyes tunneled a little, vision darker around the edges.
"That's Joe." Anne just said, and then your eyes moved to give her the same wild look.
"And I'm Anne. We like me, a lot. We don't like Joe. You've got temporary loss of normal brain function, look, Google says." Anne held her phone to your face, too close for anything to register.
"You're not helping, Anne." Joe scolded through clenched teeth.
"Wha–"
Joe was on the phone to someone, and... you knew who that was. You knew who that was. What the fuck. What was Joe Quinn doing in your bookstore?
And why were you on the floor, exactly? Your left elbow hurt, but the back of your head much worse.
"Yea, she's awake. She hasn't lost consciousness at all." Joe said to whoever was on the other side of the line. "Confused, though. Brain's all scrambled."
"Do you feel dizzy? Google says you might feel dizzy."
"I... what day is it?"
"Oh my God, she's asking what day it is." Anne said, turning to Joe like she was blaming him for what you'd asked. In Anne's terms, she was panicking. Anyone who didn't know her, though, would think she was being exceptionally calm given she'd just witnessed her boss lift a box of books that tipped her over backwards.
Your head hurt.
And you did feel dizzy. And nauseous too, a little.
It made sense that you had fallen, but it was strange to not remember and to have two strangers fret over you in your own business.
Your eyes darted from the worried face of famous actor Joe Quinn who was stood by your feet, to the wildly uninterested face of a younger girl who sat next to you with her legs crossed as she scrolled on her phone.
"Any vision disturbance? Are you more sensitive to light than you'd usually be, do you think?" Anne asked, seemingly going down a list she'd found online.
"Okay, thanks. We'll make sure she doesn't move until you get here." Joe looked at you as he said goodbye and hung up. That looked like your phone.
"Her mum's on her way."
Why was he using your phone?
"Any mental fogginess?" Anne continued, ignoring Joe and additionally ignoring you, entirely unfussed that you weren't answering any of her questions.
"Hey," Joe softly said, catching your attention as he stepped closer and leant an elbow on the counter as he bent down a little. He smiled warmly at you when he asked, "How are you feeling?"
Joe Quinn.
Joseph Quinn.
What was he doing in your bookstore?
And who the fuck was Anne?
Your eyes moved from one to the other until you saw black spots and the pain behind your eyes grew. Your ears were ringing when you softly said, "I'm... I'm gonna throw up."
Joe almost hadn't gone in today. He almost hadn't, because he didn't really have any time to waste. But, Jesus, he was glad he was there.
God, imagine if he hadn't been.
When Joe had woken up that morning, he thought he was likely going actually insane. He was flying out for work the next day, and instead of preparing, of packing, of seeing family and friends before he'd be off for a while - instead of all that, he showed up on the bookstore's doorstep at 10 am sharp. Right when Anne unlocked and opened the door. Just because that was where he wanted to be. He kind of already missed the store, even though he was right there.
Anticipatory nostalgia; Joe could feel it in his bones.
Instead of stepping aside and letting him in, she gave him a deadpan tired stare and waited for him to take the A-frame from her hands to put outside on the pavement.
Joe happily helped out. Said, "Good morning, sunshine!" all chipper and laughed when Anne looked like she had to try really hard not to vomit.
He'd called a good morning into the store, got a faint "Morning!" in reply from the backroom where you were making yourself a coffee, and found his ledge... empty.
Anne saw him look at the spot where he usually left the books that he was reading. You'd granted him that small little surface area of the store so you wouldn't have to keep putting his books back on the shelves, and so Joe wouldn't have to go looking for those same books again the next time he'd come in. A win win little ledge of excuses for Joe to return to your store. A real privilege, Joe thought.
Except he'd left books there.
He knew he did.
Where had they gone?
"I tidied." Anne said unsentimentally and challengingly looked at Joe over her mug as she took a sip of hot coffee.
She loved being a little shit and inconveniencing Joe wherever and whenever she could. Tidying the store was part of her job, and Joe knew if he was to complain, she'd have the upper hand, because what was he even really doing? The store wasn't a library, no matter how much he had starting treating it like one.
So instead, Joe used her inconvenient power move as an excuse to take his time to browse the whole store and took care to be in the exact wrong spot at the exact wrong time.
You secretly smiled every time you heard Anne sigh with frustration and heard her mutter, "Move!" under her breath before using a shoulder to push him aside. Every single time, Joe pretended he was totally oblivious. Would go, "Oh! Sorry! Was I in the way?" all innocently, but you could see how his mouth was fighting to keep his own smile hidden.
It took maybe forty minutes for Joe to have built up a little stack of books on the small sidetable next to your granddad's armchair in the window, and then Joe sat and read undisturbed for an hour and a half.
You loved it when Joe was in.
Just sat there.
Reading.
Absolutely engrossed in his own little world.
The faint feeling of envy was always overshadowed by the joy of being allowed to unashamedly stare at him from the counter, leant on both elbows.
You'd brought him a coffee after those 90 minutes of silent reading, and he'd given you a quick wink and a smile as a thank you.
Customers filtered in and out, and you went from moments of it just being Joe in the store to having eight people needing your attention simultaneously. It was both busy and not, and the switches in energy had left you in a weird spot mentally.
You hadn't realised you'd fully skipped lunch.
You'd seen Joe dart out for some pastries, and you'd ordered Anne to get her ass into the back to go and eat something, but you never followed up on your "I'll take my lunch after."
It was why, in a moment of quiet, you'd picked up a box of books from behind the counter that had sort of been in the way the whole morning, you been unsuccessfull.
Maybe you'd gotten up too fast.
Or maybe the box was just too heavy.
The entire thing had taken you down quicker than you'd been able to get it off the floor. It didn't help that the box was open. The reflex of your body became about making sure none of the books would tip out and hit you in the face, when the reflex should've been about cushioning your fall.
You shot no arms out.
You didn't drop the box.
You just... fell.
The weight of the box pushed the air straight from your lungs and left you gasping.
The back of your head had hit the wooden floorboards so hard, you immediately saw stars.
After impact, for a short moment, it was pin-drop silent. Anne froze, pausing for a moment, listening. She was waiting for you to go "I'm all right!", but that never came.
Joe was ripped from his book at the sound of the fall, but was confused. One moment you'd been there, and then now, you were gone.
When a soft wincing gasp was heard from where you were hidden form his view, he was on his feet in an instant, rounding the counter and finding you there on the floor, box of books heavy on your stomach, eyes completely glazed over as you rapidly blinked up at the ceiling in an attempt to erase the fuzzy bits in your vision.
"Oh my G– Anne!" Joe was quick to remove the box and the books that were tumbling out. "Breathe. Careful, don't move, just focus on breathing." Joe advised as he watched you struggle.
"What dropped?" Anne asked, getting closer now and trying to find the source of the whack.
"She did."
"I know she did, but what was that–"
"That was her." Joe tried to make eye-contact. "Hey, just breathe, all right? Are you hurt?"
The eye-contact failed, as did answering Joe's question.
You hadn't even properly heard him it felt like.
Anne and Joe shared a look, for a moment both unsure of what to do. Who was going to take the lead on this? Joe didn't work there, but Anne was a literal teenager.
Before they could even think of discussing a game plan, you incoherently asked through a constricted panicked voice if anyone had thought of the fire escape. They both turned to look at you, both faces frowning in confusion.
"Huh?"
"What was that?"
Joe and Anne spoke at the same time.
"I think I forgot. Are the bugs gone?" you winced as you moved a hand to where your head hurt, and Joe was quick in deciding he was going to have to be the one to call the shots on this. He'd clearly chosen to spend all day at the bookstore for a reason, so it seemed.
It took a little while for you to return to normal.
You babbled through some more disjointed chat whilst Joe carefully checked with his fingers if your head was bleeding. It wasn't, which was good. But you did wince in pain as he slowly felt around in your hair before you tried to sit up and take your shoes off.
Anne had to fight you back down onto the floor and sternly told you to relax whilst Joe slid his folded jacket underneath your head.
When your consciousness returned into the room, you were met by a girl sat by your side who was scrolling through concussion symptoms, and a guy stood up by your feet, talking to someone on the phone.
"What's going on?" You'd asked, and Anne had just casually said, "You fell."
Joe'd called your mum on your phone. Anne knew the code. Joe told himself he'd give her a stern talk about normal-people things like privacy later. Priorities lied elsewhere right now.
And then you'd thrown up into the box of books that had taken you down earlier.
Served it right, Joe thought.
Joe'd held your hair through it, and kept brushing back little pieces that kept falling into your face. His touches were so tender and gentle but they still hurt, and you were absolutely mortified. So fucking embarrassed. There was a fucking celebrity in the store and you were vomming into a box of books that, halfway through, got swapped for an empty bucket.
It smelled awful, and it probably was the most unattractive thing in the world.
You felt like the most unattractive thing in the world.
"Sorry you had to see that." you croaked when Anne handed you a glass of water to rinse your mouth.
"We think you're concussed."
Somehow, that made perfect sense.
"You took quite the tumble. The back of your head must be hurting."
You moved to sit with your back against a cupboard door, careful to not lean your head back too far, and Joe decided to stay put next to you. Keep an eye on you. Hold your hair back in case you weren't quite done throwing up yet.
Meanwhile, Anne had moved into the backroom and did her best in trying to save whatever books she could from where you'd thrown up over them.
"Do you have any pain anywhere else?"
You paused a second to focus on the feelings inside of your body, and then moved an arm to touch the opposite elbow.
"Your elbow? Are you bleeding?" Joe used a soft hand to move your arm so he could have a look. "Does it hurt a lot?" No broken skin. Joe hoped that maybe the blow he'd heard had been your elbow, and not your actual skull.
"Stop asking her a million questions!" Anne shouted from the back, like she hadn't been doing the exact same thing before.
"You'd tell me if you weren't okay, wouldn't you?" Joe's voice remained soft and warm for you. All kind and gentle.
For a moment, you just looked at him.
"Hi," he smiled, and he saw how you were trying to puzzle the situation together. "I'm Joe."
"I know who you are."
"Oh, that's great!" Joe exclaimed.
"Were you... did you happen to just be in here to buy books, or..."
Oh.
Not so great.
You knew who he was, but you didn't know who he was.
"Um, no, not really. I actually come in here a lot. I um... you let me hog one of the armchairs where I read books."
"You do?"
"Yea, it's awfully rude of me." Joe smiled. "But I'm lucky. You're very cool about it."
Joe could feel his chest swell at the faintest hint of a smile coming from you.
"He's your boyfriend." Anne bluntly interrupted as she stepped back into the storefront, and before you could even begin to process that wild bit of information, she added, "But not really. The two of you are... you're really weird about it."
It sounded like a weird joke, and you looked between the both of them to figure out what the punchline was, because you didn't get it.
Joe just smiled when you looked at him.
"She hates it."
"I do." Anne confirmed, walking across the store to move the sign on the door to 'closed'. Your mum was going to come by and pick you up to get your head checked and there was no way Anne wasn't going to go with.
Joe craned his head to watch Anne as she went to fetch the A-frame out front and then leant close and whispered, "We kind of like that she hates it."
That made you smile into your lap.
"Have you um..." you started, suddenly frowning. "Do you have a plaster for me?"
Joe's concern immediately grew again. He wasn't quite back where he was twenty minutes ago, when you'd laid right where he was sitting now, unable to catch your breath properly, but his eyes bulged like he was just as worried anyway.
"Why? Are you bleeding? Where?"
"I've not finished my homework."
"You've not..." Joe tried to make sense of something nonsensical before he realised he'd lost you again.
Joe wondered if he could let someone know he wasn't going to be able to leave the city tomorrow. Let alone the fucking country. The prospect of leaving you like this for a few weeks and having to actually do a job seemed impossible.
How was he not going to be thinking about you all the time?
To be fair, his life was already like that, a little.
But especially now; after all this, no one could expect him to not constantly worry if you were all right, could they?
"I don't think I've got any plasters for you, sorry."
"Oh," you seemed disappointed, but only for a second. "You bought Blindness from me."
There you were. Back again. God, he really did already miss you, even though you were right there.
"I did."
"You hadn't... you'd not read it, but you'd seen the film."
"I had."
"I remember."
"Read it in one day."
You'd likely be fine.
People got concussions all the time, didn't they?
"Sorry, I'm all over the place."
"You're not actually," Joe smiled. "You're right here."
Joe was going to leave the country tomorrow, and you'd stay with your mum until you'd be one hundred per cent again. You would keep the store closed, so there was no use in him hanging around anyway. And then, when you'd be all better, he'd pop back in on a random Tuesday morning without any warning, and then he could tell you all about today. You'd likely not remember a thing of it, all of it a lost moment to you, but one that he'd get to keep. Get to cherish. Get to share with you later.
"My head hurts..." you suddenly said like you'd only just realised it.
"Yea, you fell." Joe could go through this loop again, he didn't mind.
"I did?"
"Hmm, we think you're concussed. Your mum is coming to pick you up, have you checked out by a doctor to double check and make sure you're okay."
"We?"
Joe saw how you went to reach for the back of your head again, but before your fingers could disappear into your hair, the bell above the door chimed and Anne said, "No sign of her yet."
"That's Anne." Joe calmly explained, and then reached to grab hold of your hand, protecting you from touching your painful bits again. He'd make sure to hold it until your mum arrived.
Joe saw your eyes grow wide as you recognised him again, and smiled.
"And I'm Joe."
---
The Taglisted
@ali-in-w0nderland, @alwayslindie, @babybluebex, @capricornrisingsstuff, @chaoticgood-munson,
@choke-me-eddie, @demonsanddemogorgons, @did-it-work, @dirtyeddietini, @djoseph-quinn,
@dolcevit4, @eddies-puppet, @emma-munson, @emotionaldreamer, @everythinghasafacee,
@figmentofquinn, @ghost-proofbaby, @ghostinthebackofyourhead, @hanahkatexo, @harringtonfan4,
@hazelenys, @jewellethief, @joesquinns, @keikoraven, @kennedy-brooke,
@lovelyblueness, @manda-panda-monium, @mandyjo8719, @mexicanfolklore, @munsonluvrr,
@munson-mjstan, @nadixq, @nglharry, @notverywise, @pepperstories,
@phyllosilicate-s, @royale1803, @sherrylyn0628, @sidthedollface2, @solzi1420,
@songforeddiemunson, @sweetberry47, @take-everything-you-can, @thebellenouvelle, @tlclick73,
@werepartnersnow, @winterwakesthewolf, @witchwolflea, @yelyahcardella, @yunirgo
taglist currently full, sorry
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chopper-witch · 2 years
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Idk I’m so upset about the inhumans change with Ms. Marvel not because I want eugenic loving weirdos from the dark side of the moon. This is the MCU. Changes are going to happen. Good.
So I want the AoS storyline of inhumans (which I know mimics mutants in many ways). I want Daisy and YoYo.
I want Daisy and YoYo sharing their life lessons with Kamala. Daisy telling her how she needs to treasure her family. remember what she is fighting for. YoYo telling her that no matter what, what she has in the moment will always be more important than what she might gain or lose in the future. Both of them telling her that her powers are likely more than she thinks. Or teaching her how to apply them in ways she never thought of.
YoYo thought she could only, ya know, YoYo… but that isn’t true. Who knows what else could be true of this budding hero?
(Bring Joey back too. I want him back.)
Have them teach her she will make mistakes. Terrible ones. Ones that will get people killed. That her father is absolutely right - as long as it saves at least one person, she’s done a good job. That Sheikh Abdullah was right, good is a thing you do.
Tell her stories. What happened to the average shield agent during that Hydra disaster; portals; fascist mind worlds; robots with powers; the earth shattering apart and the future they prevented; space and all its stars to find someone who is technically dead; gods and demons from other realms; time traveling through the past.
God I just… those are the inhumans I want. Not the ones who are from a royal family embroiled in drama. The ones who are really just humans. Who just want to help the greater good. Who don’t even really care about the whole superhero part of it. Who worked in the shadows (with only minor complaints).
And frankly I wouldn’t even care if how they met made no sense. I just want Kamala to meet two heroes who share almost nothing story wise but could help her so much. Who could say “hey, this is what your genes are. But as you already figured out, there isn’t such a thing as normal. There’s just you.”
I love mutants, I do. I just wanted them to use Kamala to tie in the inhumans that are actually… not from a trash show and a trash population. I wanted my favorite ‘MCU’ character back :(. I wanted Daisy Johnson and I still do :(.
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the absolutely Vivid reality based chronological dream i had last night. man
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radmista · 1 month
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Sowing seeds of discontent and disharmony by hanging up on my parents birthday phone call the second my mom asked if I gained weight. Hope that sits badly on their minds while they think about how that's the first call I've engaged with them in 2 months and it was for the dogs birthday. Dad scrambling to text me for my mom that she didn't mean it. Like fuck I told her I've been having a rough month and day. She couldn't keep it to herself that badly. Fucks sake
#was already not in a great place mentally but i entertained the call and was actually feeling okay talking to them giving them an update#she just hits me with that. and I'm not normally sensitive about my weight even when my mom harped on me for gaining some a few years back#i genuinely normally don't care bc I'm happy with myself. but i know ive lost weight because I've been on icu and we don't have time to eat#im so fucking mad and im even more mad I'm crying about it#bc what the fuck#i was actually feeling like momentarily safe talking to them and being vulnerable about working on my next life stages#and she just ruined the call. i wanted to talk to my mom and dad more. i do miss talking to them about some things.#i was happy to get to see my family all together even if it was for the dogs birthday. and people were smiling and shit#and ik theyre gonna say i ruined it by being sensitive but jfc#it was literally the 2nd thing my mom said to me on the call after we sang happy birthday#why couldn't she just shut up. why couldn't she have said anything else. why did i let it bother me so much i hung up#I'm just fucking tired and sad and now feeling even lonlier than ever#i just wanted a nice moment with my family god fucking damn is that too hard to ask for#and im even more angry and sad now that i cant call them back bc my mom will get on me about smth else we were previously talking about#that phone call was supposed to be a neutral zone just for the birthday song. and i was going to ride it out but fucking hell#why didnt i just put up with it so i could have talked to my family#and no calling them back isnt an option. they haven't apologized and it would be an un neutral call#which gives them space to harass me about work and shit
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dishsaop · 2 months
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does anyone have recommendations for fictional media that has like. actual lesbians in it. not like supergirl Two White Skinny Girls, One Blonde and One Brunette Kiss media, or "its implied lesbianism!!!" but just regular fucking lesbians
#i say lesbians but i guess i mean sapphic#im just like. tired of gnawing#and of men also. sorry men in my life i love you but on god if i have to pretend one more man is butch just to get#content that isnt m/m or m/f im going to turn into a horse and run into the wilderness until im saved from the glue factory by a plucky#young woman except instead of letting her have her formative summer where she trains me and bonds w me and wins a competition w me#im going to commit horse suicide in front of her & change her life forever. just because im so tired of bland CW-marketable women kissing &#digging for scraps in a refuse bin while brushing aside 7002993829292929939292929399394 gay and het romances#m text#i will also take nonfictional lesbians if its like a story#not to be whiny on main but one of the hardest hurdles i had to jump wasnt realizing i was a lesbian. i came out to myself and to friends a#lesbian multiple times. but i would always walk it back when a friend would express doubt or a male friend would ask me out#bc i dont and especially then didnt know very many lesbians in person. and so i had to turn to examples#and all i fucking had were fictional women who liked men. or fictional lesbians who were so cleaned and sanitized and prettified#(you all know what i mean right. the 2 skinny white girls one blonde one brunette. im not crazy right)#and i would be like. i dont feel things when i look at these fictional lesbians so i guess i belong back here#(this is also bc my gender ended up being fuckier than i realized but shhhhh)#I WAS GOING SOMEWHERE WITH THESE TAGS but theyre too long and im lost.#anyway the point is if people werent so fucking weird abt fictional or onscreen lesbians maybe thered be a lot more people comfortable bein#out as lesbian#like sorry but this awful ouroboros of 'all lesbians onscreen have to be cute and sanitized' meaning that people write and believe wlw has#to be cute and pure and sanitized (OR a 'badge of honor' bc good for u u doodled two women together or had it as a background in ur fic)#meaning that therefore all portrayals of lesbianism continue to be like this. is just#and im also gonna be honest theres probably a lot of good sapphic media im just in the wrong circles to have stumbled into lol. so#yknow. personal viewer bias here#but i still like swing wildly between overly brandishing my dykeness as a badge to feel like im proving im lesbian#and like. backing up under a blanket bc i dont wanna be weird or annoying or freak people out#but if people just Saw Normal Ass Lesbians. aough.#im going to watch revolutionary girl utena one of these days even if i struggled w the writing style the first few episodes#I JUST WANNA SEE AN OLD BUTCH ONSCREEN GET SOME PUSSY.#like it also doesnt help im mostly femme4butch so seeing 2 femmes on screen is like. okay cool so what. but only femmes are 'marketable'
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everytime i take a tiny triangle out of the cake i made my brother comes in and cuts off a trapezium, making the cut a single clean line. it would be vaguely funny but like i made the thing and like could he not eat it all without leaving some for me
#rant#i guess#it really fucking annoys me how i have to cut off my share in everything that comes in this house ever#like always stay on alert for your food and stash away your share or its gonna be gone by morning#i dont even know why its making me frustrated enough to cry#its just. nice good food has always been a treat and motivator for me and my brother has a habit of always grabbing my share too#it sounds so silly out of context but like. ive had a lifetime of going through a bad tiring day with nothing to look forward to but#a nap and something i like to eat. and always opening the fridge to an empty container#or worse the box is there but then i get in bed with a book and open the damn thing to find half a spoonful inside.#it would be annoying once or twice but its just. all the fucking time.#i hate this survivalistic shit#its not long before i move out thank god but still#he always did it when i was young and my mom hardly ever said anything#like now if i want i can get myself some treats but when i was younger i didnt have much choice.#i havent had the time to bake in two years and prep plus baking the layer cake took two days. i put so much work in it.#and he ate half of it by the time i came back from fucking peeing. i cant even say anything because he gets fucking angry and aggressive#at the drop of a hat so im. crying in my room about it. look my feelings are not as drownable and consuming now. i generally dont#let things like that affect me too much. but i feel so young again and like the entire world is so unfair. i don't know#writing my feelings out on a tumblr blog is so much better than journalling they should recommend this shit in therapy
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irhabiya · 3 months
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today sucked the life out of me ya Allah
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synth-spinner · 1 year
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Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Tried my hand at one of these ^_^ inspired by @bloodonmysqueegee
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b1gwings · 6 months
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swashbuckler rogue my beloved
#i would never regret the storm sorc/tempest cleric combo that i chose for Bonk because they're an absolute damage MACHINE#but sometimes i wonder who i would be if i had gone down the martial road instead#bonk literally has a pistol and a sword and they're pretty fucking good with both of them. you normally don't see that in sorcerers.#i think my attack bonus with the sword is higher than my spell attack bonus which is kind of insane#next time i level up i have to go through all my spells because honestly im starting to get a little tired of the same old lightning bolt#PLUS now i have transmuted spell so i can just take pretty much any damage spell i want and turn it into lightning damage#for my sweet sweet bonuses#there is just some part of me that needs to play a rogue though. swashbuckler. arcane trickster. soul knife. phantom. anything#normally i don't like playing stealthy characters but there are so many good rogues out there#even a “ruff boi” a la magnus burnsides (fighter/rogue)#multiclassing my beloved too i guess#so hard for me to make a character that i don't multiclass#i might even go paladin/bard with one of my newer characters eventually#inspired by calliope petrichor#but he's different. he'd be a bard because he's a theater kid#but also i want to play a straight up paladin because i want to explore with being a character who has a connection to a god#because i've never done that before#and the themes and motifs are too strong#idk man we'll see how it goes :)#i love dnd#ALSO i feel like i cant make him a bard because i already have TWO OTHER FUCKING BARDS#GUYS (sweating) IM NOT A BARD MAIN I SWEAR#maybe for my paladin i could just take magic adept and learn some bard spells or something? like beverly naddpod? maybe#but it's not about the spells... it's about the performance checks...#i really should be working on my finals right now#im so serious if you've read this far down 1 hi :) and 2 if u have dnd characters PLEASE tell me about them. bats my eyelashes. please
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oasisofgalaxies · 6 months
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zedif-y · 7 months
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flamboyant-king · 8 months
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Ya know what inktober or cringetober, what have you, I'll be drawing all these Isaac au shitpost nonsense baby. I FEEL ALIVE. WITNESS MY CRINGE OR LOOK AWAY IN DISGUST. IM LIVING! WRAAGGHHH
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volivolition · 3 days
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[guy with chronic pain voice] i should draw pain threshold
#chemi chats#pain thresh save me. save me pain thresh.#its truly like. sure i'll find pleasure in the pain what fucking else are you supposed to do with a life full of constant bodily agony.#the alternative is suffering. the alternative is wallowing in feeling bad and sad all the time and im fucking sick of feeling this way!#so sure! i like the pain actually! whatever!! hurt me more!! bring it on! i'll feel every pain ever whatever! can't get worse than this!#if you completely own it. if you're in pain and you /want/ to be in pain does that lessen the suffering?? does that make it easier to cope?#just some thoughts about him hkjgh i worry for that guy sometimes. chronic pain havers are really going through it.#pain thresh who are your friends in the group? you and endurance are buds probably. empathy maybe? emotional pain </3#oh composure too maybe. buddy you need more friends. its hard to talk to people when you have chronic pain though. like when will you get#tired of me constantly saying ''im in pain''? because even while im holding back the full enormity of my pain i still say it a lot.#its hard to concentrate on other things and good fucking god it hurts; goddamnit you said it out loud again. you need to find friends who#are willing to be patient with you even when you ''complain'' a lot about the same thing all the time. usually other people with pain hgfij#on a secondary adhd note i should absolutely go through bdg's unraveled videos and pick out quotes that fit the skills lmao#pain thresh's is ''hey you know the crash test dummy that we throw against the wall violently? it would be cool IF IT COULD FEEL PAIN''#ency is one of the fun facts from the ''i read every halo novel'' probably hkjh and i could pull something from the sports one for phys?#hkjh anyway thats it folks hkjgh hugs and blowing kisses for everyone
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be-good-to-bugs · 13 days
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i dont understand how everyone else seems to just meet people so easily and become friends
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goethitee · 15 days
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i think im gonna quit my job. i rlly dont think i can do this anymore. it is just so exhausting my body is falling apart i am in so much pain all the time. & it is so thankless too. i mean, thats not always true. i have clients that love me & i truly care about them & their dogs, but theres just - so many assholes. & ik thats everywhere. i get it. but i put in so much work for what? & something that i actually said to my bsf the other day - i could deal with my body falling apart if the pay was good. but it isnt!! & there isnt truly anyway for it to get better!! it was never my dream job to begin with, but i could stick with it, but i really think it is time for me to leave now, before too long & theres even more pressure for me to stay. i just cant do it anymore.
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