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#im desperate. i want these shows to know Of Each Other. i want sydnee to know about tpwky and do a crossover ep and idk
toytulini · 3 years
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i love listening to the mcelroy podcasts that seem to be like, more tangential to the big ones that everyone seems to focus on, and knowing jack shit about those like, no i dont know mbmbam or taz, im here to listen to sawbones and shmanners and go from there
#toy txt post#technically i think i listen to more smirl podcasts than mcelroy? between sawbones and then i occasionally dive into#still buffering or court appointed#i listened to the buffy episodes of whatever that was where travis and teresa reviewed like the first seasons kf some tv shows? i feel like#i have mbmbam on my list but the last time i tried to listen to it i just couldnt.#i think i watched some of the ones on youtube? i enjoyed those i think cos i could also like. see who was talking#i havent actually listened to griffin yet. i might give wonderful! a shot? maybe. im still catching up on shmanners#i know everyone loves those podcasts that are like. stories like taz and other dnd podcasts and those archives or whatever and like#listen. all of you are valid. but that is not what im here for. maybe in 3 yrs ill be ready for story podcasts who knows#but rn i just want...information.#listening to why are dads is fun but even that takes some effort. im definitely more excited about the ones about movies i at least know of#or have seen like i LOVE the batman returns ep.#anyway all this to say i started listening to the beatrix potter episode of shmanners and travis mcelroy was assigned cottagecore by#his wife teresa and it was SO funny to me and also. mood. me too buddy its okay i feel the same way everytime i put on a sweater lmao#also: i desperately want a sawbones crossover or something with this podcast will kill you. something. an interaction on twitter#im desperate. i want these shows to know Of Each Other. i want sydnee to know about tpwky and do a crossover ep and idk#have teylor help out with the quarantini planning. also im all caught up on tpwky and im sad about it.#i really enjoyed listening to the tpwky and then the sawbones for all the eps where they both covered that topic. if u like sawbones give#tpwky a try its like similar but without justin there being grossed out by parasites and instead its disease ecologists being like#'that is so COOL! I mean it AWFUL for the person infected with the parasite but that life cycle is so FASCINATING' I just feel like#sydnee would get along with the erins okay. and i want to hear them do an episode on a parasite together. also more crossovers w idop
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slytherinwh0re · 3 years
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Dreams
Draco Malfoy x Female Reader
Warning: SMUT (18+ minors dni) and swearing
Summary: Where Draco has a sex dream about his best friend. (I’m such a sucker for friends to lovers).
Masterlist
A/N: I tried a different writing style so it might be a lil funky, idk, lmk.
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(Y/n)’s small hand travelled lower, skimming over the happy trail that leads to his trousers. Her lips brushed his neck making goosebumps rise across his pale skin, every touch from her would send a shock of electricity through his veins. She was an addiction, and Draco had no desire to overcome it.
The sounds she made would play in his head forever, he was sure of it. Their hands were everywhere, needing to touch each other’s skin; their clothes long forgotten on the floor by his bed.
“Ready love?” Draco hovered over her, so close to connecting them in the way he always wanted.
“Wake up dumb ass.” Fucking Theo.
He groaned to himself, embarrassed that he’d had yet another explicit dream about his childhood friend. He wondered what she’d think if she ever found out, in his head every scenario ended in heart break.
***
Draco had successfully avoided her all week, every attempt she’d made to hangout he’d shut her down with some bullshit excuse but he should’ve known (y/n) would do something about it. That’s how the blonde found himself limb locked and being levitated to her dorm. He was pissed but so was she, and fuck did she look sexy.
“Why’re you acting so weird Draco?” She asked after lifting the spell. It’s true, he had been acting strange but how could he not? Every time he looked at his the witch he’d think back to the dreams he’d been having. A hard dick is the last thing he needs right now, especially in a room alone with her.
“I’m not acting weird.” He wasn’t surprised when she rolled her eyes, an unimpressed look on her pretty face.
“Yes you are, and you’ve been avoiding me. Did I do something wrong?” He hated himself for turning into such a sappy fucking git over her but that sad pout cuts straight through him. Immediately he’s pulling her into his chest, arms wrapping around her body.
“Of course you didn’t, I’ve just been having these dreams and I don’t know how to feel about them.” He was practically squirming but he knew he had to explain himself to the girl or she’d think it was her fault he was being so odd. Who would’ve thought Draco Malfoy would feel the need to explain himself to anyone, then again (y/n) wasn’t just anyone to him.
“Well why wouldn’t you just say that? I’ve been running around all week trying to hangout with you and you’ve barely spoken two words to me.” He doesn’t answer, instead he gives her an apologetic look that has her eyes rolling yet again. “Go on then, what’re the dreams you’re having about?”
The slytherin can’t look her in the eye, the thought of telling her makes him cringe but maybe talking about it will make them stop. “They’re actually about you.”
“About me? What about me?” She pauses, a shocked look adorning her face, “are they like-” she waved her finger between the both of them, signaling to what she thinks it is and he nods, knowing she’s already understood. “Oh- OH.”
“(Y/n), if this changes everything I completely understand but I need you to know I can’t help it, that’s why I’ve been avoiding you.” The witch was silent, she just stared at him and he was sure he’d lost her forever.
That’s why he was so stunned when she started making her way over to him, not stopping until their bodies were an inch away from each other’s. Her hands went around his neck and started playing with the hair there, Draco leaned into her, deciding that if this is what he could get he’d take it.
“Tell me what I did in your dreams Draco.” He about lost it when (y/n)’s lips brushed across his neck, her nimble finger still tugging at his hair.
“This. You’d do this.” She hummed against his skin, acknowledging that she’d heard him. Her hands moved down his chest and over his stomach until she reached the hem of his shirt. The girl looked up at him, silently telling him to take it off.
Draco immediately yanked it over his head, only to realize in that second she’d taken hers off as well, now her hand was reaching behind her back, undoing her bra. Every inch of her skin that’s revealed to him chipped away at his self control but he wanted to see how far she’d take this.
Her bra fell to the floor, her nipples were peaked and begging to be played with but before he could move, she was pressed against his chest. Skin on skin, and she’s kissing him.
The boy felt as if he were on fire, his hand pressed against her lower back, pushing her further into him, deepening the kiss. They moved in sync, their tongues tangled together and hands touching bare skin.
“Did we do that in your dreams?” She pulled away, her lips a bit swollen.
“Yes.” Her smile was contagious, he was sure she’d stop there and he was more than happy to but (y/n) was never one to do what was expected. Instead, she started unbuttoning his trousers and kissing her way down his chest until she was on her knees in front of him.
He was speechless, the sight of the topless girl on her knees for him was enough for Draco to die happy. She had her eyes fixed on him when she got his pants down, already rubbing him over his briefs. With one last smirk she was pulling them down.
“And this? Did I do this to you?” His dick was already leaking with precum when she wrapped her lips around him.
“Fuck yes.” Her hand moved in rythm with her mouth, flicking her wrist every time. The combination had him throwing his head back but he lowered it quickly, not wanting to miss a second of his dick in her mouth. Draco grabbed her hair, needing something to hold onto, the small moan she let out vibrated through him.
(Y/n) watched him through her eyelashes, the pleasure etched on his face had her rubbing her thighs together, desperate for any sort of friction. The girl was usually bold but even this was a little far stretched, even for her. She knew that if she hadn’t taken this opportunity to see where things would lead she’d regret it and damn is she happy she did.
The control she had over him in this moment is empowering, to watch Draco Malfoy fall apart because of her is beyond erotic. She hollowed her cheeks, running her tongue up the base with every bob of her head.
She let him out her mouth with a pop, stood back up, and dropped her skirt and panties.
“Let me show you what I do to you in my dreams (y/n).” Draco’s voice was raspy, the desire he felt for her made his mind cloudy.
“Show me.” That’s all it took for them to find her bed, lips locked, and his fingers sliding in and out of her sopping cunt. Her walls clenched his fingers deliciously, his thumb rubbed at her clit in a way that made her chest arch into him. The blonde brings his fingers to his lips, needing to get a taste. One day he’d devour her but for tonight just a taste would do.
“Ready love?” He lines himself up at her entrance, the anticipation for this moment was well worth the wait. To see his girl naked underneath him is an image that’d be burned into his mind forever.
“I’ve always been ready for this.” She kissed at his neck, pulling away to watch as he sank himself into her. They both let out an airy moan, her hands were back in his hair, and his were roaming every inch of her body.
Draco hitched her legs onto his shoulders, his hips setting a fast pace, her moans filling the room. The witch gripped him like a vice, her nails ran down his chest, leaving scratches that would be left as a reminder of this night for the next few days.
Her tits bounced with every deep thrust, (y/n) could feel herself getting close but she wasn’t quite ready for it to be over. Instead she lowered her legs and flipped them over, the new position had her screaming his name.
“Oh, Draco!” She bounced on him faster, eyes never leaving his fascinated ones. He looked at her as is she was the most beautiful girl in the world and in his eyes she is.
Her body was on fire, every time the pretty girl sank down on his cock she felt herself get closer to the edge. The blonde felt her walls begin to flutter, his hands that were situated on her breasts moved so one was toying with her clit and the other was wrapped around her throat.
The combination of her riding him and his hands on her was too much for (y/n), with his encouragement she found herself clenching around him as they came together. Their names leaving each other’s lips as their hips jerked and their vision went white.
“That was better than any dream.” He told her as they caught their breath.
*
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slytherinwh0re · 3 years
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Mission accomplished
Draco Malfoy x Female Reader
Warnings: SMUT (18+ minors dni), possessiveness, alcohol, and swearing
Summary: Where you make Draco jealous at a slytherin party.
Masterlist
A/N: no cap this may be my favorite smut that I’ve ever written lol
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If there’s one thing slytherin’s are best at, it’s throwing a party. Anytime there was even a tiny reason for celebration the house of Salazar was always ready to show it’s inhabitants a good time.
End of term parties were always the craziest, every one in attendance knew they’d be miserable the following morning but it’s a risk they’re willing to take for the sake of a great night. After all, no one’s out drinking a slytherin. With the flashing lights, thumping music, dancing bodies, and endless booze, the green common room was transformed into a scene straight from a movie.
That’s how you found yourself on the makeshift dance floor with Pansy, buzzed off a few cups of fire whiskey, and dressed to impress a certain blonde who had been watching you from across the room. You knew what you were doing, the sultry swing of your hips were intended for him to see but when you tried beckoning him over to dance with you he simply shook his head.
Well that just wasn’t gonna work for you so instead of continuing to dance with Pansy you grabbed the closest guy to you, knowing exactly what it would do to him.
“He’s gonna be furious.” You had your back pressed to Theo’s chest, swinging your hips the same way you were before, your head thrown back onto his chest and your hands around his neck.
“That’s the point.” You grab his hands and set them on your hips, knowing he’s too respectful to touch you without permission. Theo’s a good friend, he knew what was going on, he’d help you out even if it was just to get under Draco’s skin for your own pleasure.
“I better not get punched for this (y/n).” He whispers in your ear, making you laugh as you continue to dance together to the loud music. Your bodies flush against each other’s as you let the deep bass pulse through you.
When you felt the familiar hand grab your wrist and yank you away from your dance partner you knew you were in for it. Draco may as well have had steam blowing out his ears from how angry he looked, he made sure to send Theo one of his infamous glares before dragging you away from the party to his dorm. You look over your shoulder and wink at your friend, he laughs, knowing you’ve just gotten exactly what you wanted.
“Strip.” You’d barely closed the door behind you when he’d demanded this but you knew better than to disobey him right now. Draco watched from where he was seated on the edge of the bed as you slowly discarded your clothes.
You kicked off your shoes, tugged the tight cropped top over your head, and unclasped the lacy bra you’d worn. When you got to the small leather skirt you turned so your back was facing him, while slightly bent over, you slowly pull it down your legs, and swing your hips a little just to drive him crazy. That left you in only your panties and black fishnets.
“Leave those and get on the bed.” Draco was right behind you, one hand splayed across your stomach, the other around your throat. You nod your head and he lets you go, his eyes dark with lust as you climb onto the center of his bed. With a flick of his wand your wrists are bound over your head to the frame of his bed. “You’ve been so bad (y/n), what were you thinking letting Theo touch you like that when you’re clearly mine?”
“I just wanted to dance and you wouldn’t so I had to find someone else.” You watch as the handsome blonde removes his clothes and climbs on the bed, kneeling in between your legs in only his boxers while you’re completely at his mercy.
“After tonight you’re not gonna forget who you fucking belong to ever again.” Mission accomplished. His hand lowers until it’s at your center, lightly stroking you before tearing a hole in the fishnets you’d worn under your skirt. Small whimpers leave your lips as he works his fingers over your soaked panties.
“Draco, please... I need you.” You needed him to touch you, the smirk on his face says it all, he wanted you to beg. Finally he pushes your panties to the side, his thumb finds your swollen clit, he lowers his head in between your legs, and licks straight up your center.
His tongue skillfully swirls around your pussy, licking and sucking in perfect intervals, just the way he knows you like it. Your bound hands are clenched over your head, your nails leaving crescents on your palms from the pleasure you’re receiving. The moans that leave your mouth are sinful but when he sucks on your clit and pushes a finger through your entrance the screams you were holding in come tumbling out all at once.
“You’re mine (y/n), only mine. Only I can touch you like this, make you scream like this.” Your eyes roll into back of your head from his words, moaning in agreement as he pushes in a second finger, you’re so close you start shaking.
A gasp leaves your mouth at the sudden loss of contact, Draco’s off the bed, pulling down his boxers, and you whimper from being left so close to edge. He climbs back on top of you, his cock dripping with precum as he strokes himself.
“Beg. Beg me to fuck you, that’s what you want right love—me to fuck you?” He smirks at how desperate you must look, your hips bucking up towards him, trying to get a bit of friction as you pull on the restraints around your wrists. “Tell me how bad you want me.”
“Plea-” he rubs his cock on your sensitive clit, “please, Draco. I want you so bad, I want to feel your cock so bad.” The slytherin grabs one of your legs and brings it over his shoulder before slamming into you. His eyes trained on your tits that bounce with every sharp thrust of his hips, breathy moans leaving his mouth when you scream his name.
One hand is wrapped around your throat and you need to touch him, you need to feel his skin under your fingertips. “Please let me touch you, I need to touch you.” You beg him, your head thrown back onto the silky pillow, staring back at him with hooded eyes.
When Draco unties your wrists you immediately find his hair, both of you moaning at the feeling of your hands on him. His cock hitting the spongy spot deep inside that had you clenching around him.
He pulls out and flips you both over so you’re on top. His hands running over your legs covered in the fishnets as you sink back down on him. “Ride me until you cum.” He demands as you quickly start bouncing on top of him.
You lowers your body so your breasts are against his chest and he pulls you in for a needy kiss, his hand wrapped around your hair, and his tongue tangled with yours. “Mine. You’re mine.”
“I’m all yours Draco, don’t want anyone else.” You assure him, still moving against him as he meets your hips halfway. His thumb finds your bundle of nerves and traces small circles onto it making you scream, your orgasm washes over your body in powerful waves as he helps you continue bouncing on him until he’s releasing inside of you.
You lay next to him, your head on his chest, and his fingers playing with your hair when he grabs your wrists; frowning at how red they look.
“Do they hurt?” He examines them for a minute before looking at you to see if you’re in pain.
“Not really, just a bit sore.” His frown deepens before he grabs his wand, healing them quickly and making sure to kiss both of them.
“I might have to kill Theo.” You laugh at the over dramatic boy.
“Theo was simply helping me accomplish my goals for tonight.” Draco rolls his eyes at that.
“Next time just ask me to fuck you.”
“Where’s the fun in that?”
*
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