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theringers · 3 years

Note

V-card anon: hi sorry about that first ask i kinda went into a fugue state (spelling?) altered state of reality maybe when i wrote that and damn near outlined a fic in your inbox

The way we played hot seat was either part of a larger drinking game when a certain card was pulled from a deck, or just on it's own. You sit in a circle, everyone has a drink, usually a beer or cider. In the card pull version, the one who pulls the card gets asked a question by every person playing and if they refuse to answer they drink from their drink. In the standalone, you do that but everyone gets a turn being asked until people get bored and leave. Fun way to find out shit about people. Usually the unwritten rule is that you can't lie. I imagine everyone sitting on shitty chouches and chairs in a semi circle around a table full of cups and bottles playing it

Questions i have been asked: are you a top or bottom? Do you like anal? Wheres the weirdest place you've fucked? Body count? Favorite position (sexual)? Fuck marry kill/ignore people in this room (EVERY TIME I PLAYED I GOT THIS QUESTION)? Tits or ass or other? Favorite non sexual body part ex. Thigh? Ideal fuck buddy? Sex regrets? Etc

Also more weird details i have head cannoned out for some drivers and most likely does not fit with irl personalities, do with this what you will, use it or don't i just have feelings. Also everyone is like compressed in age to like 20-27ish except for some of the grid who i will just think of as younger alumns who come back:

Danny R: social chair, owns a jeep he takes the doors off of in the summer, walks girls home at night to make sure they're ok, tries to DJ house events and is rebuffed by literally everyone, has like 30 pairs of vans you trip over in his room, stolen roadsigns everywhere, masters in something arigcultural or physiological, cutoff frat shirts for days, fuckboy but nice, a bit cringe, will drive around with you at night so you can scream, met reader bc she had a band tee on and wanted to talk to her about it (no gatekeeping)

Charles: some kind of engineering or math degree but no one has any idea how the fuck he's gotten so far, 4.0 never studies, games with other house members, will show up at events randomly you will have no idea how he gets on your couch but he is there, the best and worst taste in clothes, is the only one allowed to play the piano in the house, sweet, cannot help you with studies but is always down for helping you out after, has to be reminded to clean stuff, disaster bi, reader met his gf first and they probably met through that

Pierre: good fashion and music taste, shirt is gone halfway through the night, also fuckboy but wholesome, actually studies, plays a sport for sure probably soccer in some way either club or Division he's too good for rec, will hold your hair back so you can throw up, will tell you your outfit sucks, good at math, also part of the squad that games, econ major, workout buddies with reader anday have taken a math class together

Max: is part of the hockey team he will go pro, also actually studies, got into gaming because of Charles, has the nicest car, is serious until he gets a couple drinks in him, he and Daniel are close and roomed together at some point, owns like 30 sets of the same outfit a white tee and jeans, knows reader through Dan and they get dragged by him to some of the same stuff

Lando: is a pledge or new member his big is Carlos, undeclared major, just happy to be here, gaming squad, used to play lacrosse or something equally obscure, king of knowing where the good snacks are, weirdly good at beer pong, growing into a fuckboy wholesomeness level tbd, probably sweet with reader as she helped him through a blackout or something, met her because she's basically house mom for some of the new boys (the kind of mom who will teach you to do laundry or iron ONCE)

Carlos: hockey flow but does not play hockey, actually studies and is smarter than what people give him credit for, came from a private high school and uni really opened his horizons, also good study buddy, gets along with most people, goes to office hours the most out of the actually studies gang, fun at parties, owns the frat dogs, he and reader met at Office hours (they were the only students) and found they had mutual friends too

Lewis: is/was president of frat, great grades greater bod, did full evolution from fuckboy to good man, has the back tests and the moral support, up for late noght talks about life, definitely was a D1 athlete, best fashion game, implemented no hazing policy, fits into notable alum or PhD category

Mick: undergrad like Lando, also plays soccer or something, too sweet, also walks girls home/holds your hair back etc, cleans parts of the house that aren't his responsibility, higher alcohol tolerance than you expect, everyone is bizarrely protective of him, legacy member (his dad was a legend), drives a motorbike around campus and can't decide between law and psychology, actually studies, met reader through the frat and she would die for him, brings her to class on the bike sometimes because the bike is faster

George: business major, frat treasurer, three ring binder business casual in class kind of guy, nice enough, shirt comes off when drunk, runs marathons and a podcast about investments, best notes in the game and great study partner, actually studies, is drinking monster at 6AM but not because he stayed up late, he and reader met through the frat and sometimes drink wine and bitch together

Lance: hockey player, legacy member, studies sometimes, sarcasm on point, great at stack cup, very chill, knows every good nap spot on campus, also has high alcohol tolerance, is the kind of person who does well in the cold but does not like it, wears headphones so people don't talk to him, great one on one but not in crowds, business major and minor in computer science, probably also met thru Lance's gf but vibe as more introverted people and will cover for each other if one does not want to go out

Nicky: a good boy, part of the walks people home squad, sets up designated drivers for parties, good snack game, future in medical field, good listener, pretty good study buddy, midnight snack enabler, met reader through frat and his gf he and reader are on babysitting duty together sometimes when others get too drunk/high

Yuki: also a pledge or new, majoring in games or computer science as they gave me the same energy as him, games squad, bit of a mad lad, has several stolen street signs, good, met reader through frat and Yuki is the only one patient enough to explain some games to reader, they cuss people out on mic

Esteban: good man, has a full ride scholarship, actually studies, also good study buddy, Dan's little, plays soccer but maybe on a rec team because he prioritizes school, very sweet guy as well, probably chose a really practical major/dual major, met reader through Dan and are also dragged similar places by him

Antonio: manbun, philosophy or classics major possibly business dual, generally good natured but can be seen supplying his own wine at parties, used to be really into metal but kept the hair, does not know that people find him attractive, soccer boi, met reader through frat and she's the only one who will (pretend) to listen to him rant about philosophy

Alex Albon: another full scholarship guy, somehow gets along with everyone, switched majors due to an asshole professor, electrical engineering or computer engineering, actually studies, helps with frat pets,will show you pictures of his cats at home, sweetie, another contender for will hold your hair or walk you home, probably met reader through a class or club and found they had mutual friends and that reader is friends with his gf

Notable alums:

Checo - dad, successful in finance somehow (he looks like an really successful accountant of CFO to me idk why)

Kimi - dad but people forget he is, holds the record for most drinks in 24 hours that will never be come close to by anyone else, shows up on random alum weekends with 2 kegs, legally cannot tell you what he does or he would actually have to murder you

Valterri - was good at a sport when he was there, now a very effective lead engineer at an architectural firm

Seb - environmental or mechanical engineering, all around good guy with someone the best grades in frat history

Alonso - legendary for sexual exploits (consensual)

Anyone I put as actually studies is probably the type reader would hang around for more serious stuff/schoolwork and would probably be closer to, with the exception of Dan bc I feel like he'd be like we're friends now :)) we shall hang or Charles bc he will just show up. I also imagine she has a pretty good friendship with any existing gf, however if a driver does have a gf and he is the love interest sorry bb girl u gotta go for the purposes of this fic

Sorry this is so long hahaaaaaaa glad you liked my Charles thoughts ilu

i honestly wasn’t going to share this like the rest of the anon asks i’ve gotten that i keep close to my heart but this was just too good to keep to myself.

LOOK! AT! THIS!

f1 drivers as frat bros/college students headcannon

i’m writing a series - each “chapter” will be a smut with a different frat bro and i’m hoping to post a sneak peek this week some time but here’s something to hold you over and give you some ideas

to my vcard anon - i appreciate this so much. my inbox is always open for ur thoughts bc they are SO GOOD !! can’t wait for you to read the first part of the series bby

PS if some of this doesn’t make sense to u feel free to send in asks (i know a lot of this is focused on american college culture so if u don’t get it i’m happy to explain)

#f1 smut asks #headcanons #f1 imagines #vcard anon #f1 blurb #f1 headcanon #f1 as frat bros

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captainillogical · 5 years

Text

Devil’s Ballroom ch.2

A year after the events from the earth’s final attack, Little Homeworld is finally complete, and there’s a new jazz bar where gems and humans mingle and drink. - As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now.

Spinel/Reader

collab with wife @firstofficertightpants

The place actually happened to be like, right on the edge of Little Homeworld. Outside had full glass windows, tall, that reached the ceiling. Inside the lighting was dim, and a bit smokey. You figured it looked alright enough to head in, and gave the bouncer your ID. He nodded and you walked in. It smelt of cigars, and of cinnamon, and it wasn’t entirely unpleasant. A pretty woman in a low-cut red dress was playing the piano on the stage, and it was some contemporary jazz piece. The low murmur of people talking filled the air in between the swells of music, and the place actually seemed busy with people and even gems enjoying themselves. You liked the vibe. It was.. comfortable. At ease. You looked over at the bar, rather than any of the tables, and saw a spot near the end. Perfect. Right by the bathroom. You headed over and plopped down on the stool. There were three empty at the end, so you took the one in the middle, which had the best view of the stage from back here.

While waiting for the bartender to come back down this side, you took the chance to look at the people around you. A couple familiar faces.. small town you know? And some new ones. New gems too. You can see Mr. Fryman sitting at a table with Kofi and Nanefua, and they look like they’re playing poker. You try not to snicker since Kofi looks absolutely blasted, and Mr. Fryman is cursing up a storm because Nanefua is clearly winning. You see her wink at Mr. Fryman. You suspect a rigged game.

Your phone chimes a couple times. You pull it out of your bag, and check to see who’s bothering you. Ah. The group chat.

Alex: ughhh you guys my gmas killing me

Alex: no seriously mexico fucking blows rn

Alex: i cant step outside without feeling like my balls are melting off my body

Alex: and my brother won’t stop listening to the book of mormon soundtrack

Alex: im going insane

Your friends are so melodramatic. You type out a couple of replies.

Y/N: You should be used to mexican summers by now, you go every year.

Y/N: And for the record, your brother is valid. Book of Mormon slaps.

Alex: what the fuck youre supposed to be on my side u ass

Alex: i thought our special thing was wicked. OUR SPECIAL THING, Y/N

Y/N: I’m allowed to like multiple things. Including musicals.

Alex: never. fuck you. also what are you even doing rn come play minecraft with me

Y/N: Yeah as much as I’d like to, I can’t.

“Y/N! So you finally came to see what this place is all about! What can I get ya?” you hear a familiar voice ask. Turning around to face the voice, you see Bismuth wearing her usual overalls and a rather nice looking bow tie.

“Hey Bis, how’s it going? I like what you’ve done with the place. It’s nice. And uh, I’ll just take a hard cider for now.” You smile at her and set your phone down for a minute.

“Thank you! After we finished Little Homeworld, I had to find something else to focus on in my down time.” She explains while grabbing your drink from the fridge under her side of the bar, and opens it. “So tell me,” She sits the drink in front of you and leans on the counter. “What brings you out here today?”

You take a rather long sip from your drink before meeting the large gems eyes. On the stage, a tall, beardy man replaces the woman that just finished her piece. He immediately starts this jaunty, irish tune. He’s singing loudly, and it’s not bad. A couple of people are clapping to the tune.

“I just really needed to get out.” You replied, taking another sip from your drink. “I was kinda hoping I’d meet someone new, maybe get another friend to hang out with, since my friends wanted to ditch me this summer.” As you’re saying this, more people join the clapping. It’s getting a bit rowdy. “Or maybe at least get drunk enough to forget how lonely I feel.” You add, shrugging.

“Well, I can supply the drinks, and at least a bit of company.” Bismuth winks, and turns to the patron 6 seats up waving her over.

You check your phone again, and there’s more from Alex. AND Harper? She must still have phone service wherever she’s at. Alex: what are u fuckin doin that so important that u cant play minecraft with ur best friend

Harper: yeah, Y/N. the heck. Also alex, get lost, she’s MY best friend bitch

Alex: u had ur chances but u left us so we’re a duo now. u can go

Harper: excuse me!? I WILL end you.

Y/N: Oh my god, chill. I’m just out right now, so I can’t okay?

Y/N: And nice of you to join us, Harper.

Harper: fuck you I miss you okay. And I miss constant wifi :(

Alex: OUT!? What do you mean OUT. its night. u play games with ME during this time

Alex: for real what the fuck are you doing

Harper: yeah, you don’t go out without us. Wtf are you doing?

Y/N: I’m at a bar!! Alex: WHAT

Alex: dont tell me its the one place that just opened

Alex: Y/N do NOT betray me you TOLD ME you were gonna go with me!!

Y/N: I was. But I was also bored and you’re both gone, soooo.

Alex: wow

Alex: i cant believe youve done this to me

Harper: hmmm. ;)

Harper: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ;)

Y/N: What.

Harper: you tryin to find girls again?

Harper: like that one time you went to empire city just to peruse the mall?

Alex: LMAOOOOO

Y/N: No.

Alex: LMAOOOO Y/N GOOD LUCK TRYING TO FIND A GF LOLL

Y/N: I’m not trying to find a girlfriend you fucks. Christ.

Y/N: Also Alex, you’re one to talk. You can’t KEEP a girlfriend.

Alex: ur just mad i have a passionate and intimate relationship w/ my hand

Y/N: And it will probably stay that way.

Y/N: Besides, so far, no one cute here. So it’s a bust.

Harper: a bust. Lmfao u just outed yourself :)

Y/N: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

You put your phone down before seeing whatever Alex attempts to reply back with. It sounds like the current boisterous song is coming to a close, and really, most of the people here are clapping along with this guy. It’s fun. And despite the playful ribbing from your shit-talking friends, you’re starting to have a nice time. You finish your drink, and nod over to Bismuth who catches your eye and nods back. You look over onto the stage, the man having cleared the piano, and see Lapis wiping down the piano and seat. Guess he spilled his drink while playing. Lapis, unlike Bismuth, actually dressed up a bit for the job. Her hair was pulled in a cute, small bun, and she was wearing what looks like a tailored tux with no jacket. The vest fit her quite well. She seemed.. happy. Good for her.

No one had taken up the stage again yet, but the place was still lively with chatter. You see someone out of the corner of your eye move towards the stage, but Bismuth comes over again so you tear your gaze away.

“Another cider? Or do you want something else this time, Y/N? She asks, cleaning a glass with a rag, and moves on to the next one.

“Ehh, yeah, give me another cider.” You say as you pull out your phone again. Bismuth sets down the drink in front of you.

Harper: what a goddamn disaster. she got that from me i think

Alex: no, youre both disasters separately

Y/N: Fuck you guys. Give me a break.

You hear the piano start to play again, and someone pulling the mic forward. You look up to see pink hair.. And someone kind of familiar. She’s wearing black slacks, a white collared shirt, and suspenders. The shirt is partially open, and you see part of a pink gem showing through on her chest. It looks like she’s got mascara running down her face.

And then.. she starts to sing.

It’s lovely. It’s slow and a bit sad, but she seems to be enjoying herself. She’s definitely done this before. Quite a few of the people around quiet down some, so you can hear her pretty clearly. You drink some, and text your friends.

Y/N: Guys, I lied. There’s a cute gem here who can sing.

Alex: holy fuk

Alex: what

Y/N: She looks kind of familiar though? I can’t quite place it though.

Harper: dude theres like near 100 gems now in little homeworld lol

Harper: you’ve probs seen most in passing? :P

Alex: are you serious Y/N? cant flirt with human women so u turn to aliens? lmfao

Y/N: Ohhhhh my god. Die.

The gem on stage sings the chorus with gusto - man she’s really getting into this. You’re kind of taken a bit with her performance. It just pulls you. But also.. She really seems familiar now and it’s bothering you.

Y/N: No I’m serious she seems really familiar and not in that In Passing kind of way.

Harper: what does she look like?

Alex: yeah a description would be nice

Harper: TAKE A PIC

Alex: holy shit YES

Y/N: I can’t take a pic. She’s too far away, it’ll be blurry.

Alex: literally just zoom in lord almighty

Y/N: Okay. Hold on a sec.

You turn on your camera app, and face the stage. Looks like the gem is actually finishing up her song. Perfect, you’ll snap a pic once she stands up. She finishes, and most of the people are clapping for her. You zoom in, and it’s grainy, but decent enough to make out most of her. You snap the pic.

The flash was on.

A couple people turn to look at you, and you try turning away quickly, horrified, and see the gem looking in your direction before walking off into the crowd of people. You cannot imagine a worse scenario.

Y/N: FUCK FUCCCCKKKKKK.

Y/N: (image sent)

Y/N: I GOT YOUR FUCKING PIC BUT THE FLASH IS ON.

Y/N: I’M PRETTY SURE SHE SAW THAT IT WAS ME THAT TOOK THE PIC.

With shaking hands, you take another sip of your drink and wait for a reply. Why is life like this.

Harper: uh.

Harper: ummm.

Alex: wait

Alex: one fucking second

Y/N: WHY ARE NONE OF YOU CARING ABOUT MY PLIGHT.

Y/N: I’M TRYING NOT TO COMBUST ON THE SPOT HERE.

Alex: shut up for one second

Alex: harper isnt that

Harper: uhh. yeah i think so.

Y/N: WHAT!? WHO IS IT. WHY DOES THAT MATTER AT THIS POINT.

Alex: lmao i cant believe i have to tell u this

Alex: bitch do u remember that shit that happened last summer

Alex: where half the town almost died from that gem shit

Alex: that’s her Alex: that’s the bitch who almost killed like, the entire planet

Harper: you know that night your dad almost died??

As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now.

#spinel #spinel x reader #spinel su #steven universe #spinel self insert #my fic #devils ballroom

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chrvstenpress · 5 years

Text

dirty af1s

the preath break up au no one asked for. based on Dirty AF1s by Alexander 23.

a/n: I really like this song and Christen always wears her AF1s. I kinda wrote a thing. It’s hella sad but if you stick around for the end hopefully it’ll make up for it.

______________________

you took your smile back to New York

but you left your toothbrush

and I hope you bought a new one but I’d love you toothless

Tobin was hurt. She was broken. She was in love.

She and Christen lived together in Portland. That was, up until two weeks ago when Christen left.

///

“Chris, I don't know what you want me to do!”

“Care, Tobin! I want you to fucking care!”

“I do care! You think I don't care about you? You think that I don't spend every fucking minute - fuck that, every second of my life caring about you?! That’s all I fucking do.”

“Then show me!” “Chris. I love you. I am in love with you. I’m sorry if you think I don't care. I don't know what to fucking do anymore.” The tears had spilled over by now. Both of them were red in the face, wet on the cheeks, and so damn exhausted.

“I think I need time.” Christen spoke into the tense air.

“Baby, no. No. What? Let’s figure this out. Right here, right now. Please.” Tobin stepped forward toward her girlfriend, trying to grab her hand, but Christen moved away before she could.

“I need time, Tobin. I’m tired. I’m so fucking tired. If you love me like you say you do, let me take my time.”

They stared at each other, hurt evident in their eyes. Tobin didn't want to let her go. She worried that if she let her go, she wouldn’t come back. She would fall out of love with her and stay in New York. But she couldn’t stop her. She couldn't make Christen’s decisions for her. So she nodded. Her tears were burning her cheeks but the pain in her chest was worse.

“Okay.” She whispered. “I don’t want to let you go, Chris.” She tried for Christen’s hand once more, the girl trying to pull away again but the pleading look on Tobin’s face convinced her to let her have this moment. She took Christen’s hand in both of hers, pulling it up to her lips and placing a watery kiss on the knuckles there. Christen broke even harder. “I don't want to let you go, but if it’s what you need, I don't want to hurt you more than I already have. So I'll let you go.”

______________________

Tobin cried what seemed like everyday. Her heart was nearly empty without the green-eyed girl. Her green-eyed girl.

When she would get ready for the day and get ready to sleep at night, she would see Christen’s pink toothbrush right next to her orange one. She didn’t have the heart to throw it out, secretly hoping that the girl would come back and need it again.

She laughed (and then cried some more) the first time she saw it, remembering how Christen always demanded that she brush her teeth before bed or her teeth would fall out.

///

“Babe, go brush your teeth!” Christen laughed as Tobin kissed her a million times.

“Why does my breath smell?” Tobin pulled back with a worried look on her face.”

“No, but it’s just good hygiene, Tobs. If not, your teeth will fall out for not taking care of them.”

“But baby, I just wanna kiss you. Won’t you love me even if my teeth fall out?” She whined with a pout.

“Of course I would. I’d love you forever, no matter what. Now, go.” She shoved Tobin off the bed and toward the restroom.

“I hope you got a new toothbrush, Chris. But I’d love you forever, no matter what, anyway. Even toothless.” She whispered to no one.

______________________

I used to sing while in the shower, now I don't

cause you're not there to sing along

while you put your makeup on

Tobin’s playlist came on the speaker as she showered. She was used to being goofy and singing with her girlfriend as she showered and Christen did her makeup, but not this time.

Again, she was pained with the memories of Christen everywhere in her life.

///

“Tobin, we’re going to be late! We promised Alex we’d be there by 6.” Christen said loudly over the sound of running water and loud music in the restroom as she did her makeup in front of the vanity.

“Chris, it’s fine. Lex is always late anyway. Now sing with me.”

“Every time I look into your eyes I see it. You’re all I neeeeed. Every time I get a bit inside, I feel it. C’mon, baby, right here!”

“Whooooo, who would've thought I’d get yooou” They sang together loudly, laughing at how ridiculous they sounded compared to the angelic voice of Daniel Caesar.

///

Tobin shut her music off, not being able to enjoy it anymore.

______________________

and I love you just the same

but I'm worried words lose weight

does it hit you just as hard from 3000 miles away?

from 3000 miles away, from three-

I used to like to go out before I met you

now I just go out to forget you

put my nice shoes on so strangers

can't tell that I miss your dirty Air Force 1′s

I used to like to go out before I met you

now I just go out to forget you

put my favorite shirt on so strangers

don't know that it looks way better on you

Tobin was a player before she met Christen. She enjoyed hanging out at random bars every weekend, picking up girls to take home and then never talk to again.

And then she met the love of her life. Christen made her lose every interest in any other girl in the world, any chance to have meaningless sex, any chance to fool around.

Now, she’s finding herself getting ready to go back to her old ways. She put on her white Givenchy shirt with ripped holes in it along with her cleanest pair of Nike’s she could find. Christen used to steal that shirt all the time even though she knew it was Tobin’s favorite.

“I just wanna be as cool as you, babe,” she would say. Tobin would always reply, “Well, mission accomplished because you look way cooler than me,” with a smile and a kiss.

“Tobs, are you sure you want to go out tonight?” Alex questioned hesitantly.

“Yeah, why? I’m fine. Let’s go out and have fun, like the old times.”

Alex knew the old times were bad. She knew tonight was going to be bad. But she didn’t have the heart to tell her broken best friend no.

///

Come 11 p.m., Tobin was a wreck. She had girls hitting on her left and right but she wanted none of them. She laid her head on Alex’s shoulder, the two girls tucked into a booth in the far back corner of the bar.

“I miss her, Lex.” Tobin whispered out drunkenly as she cried on Alex’s blouse.

“I know, Tobs. Give it time.”

///

At 1 a.m., Alex dropped Tobin off at home, giving her a glass of water and setting some Advil on her bedside table for the morning. She put Tobin in bed, leaving her with a kiss on the forehead and a promise to check in on her the next day.

Tobin didn't go to sleep, though. Instead, she grabbed her phone and opened up Christen’s contact.

“I lovw yoi and I muss yoy so mucj.” The first text read.

“Do tou mis mw at al? do u caer?” Was the second.

“ur al tje way on rhe orher sife of yhe countri ans I wisj u wer w me.” Was the last before she cried herself to sleep.

She woke up in the morning due to the loud vibrating sound against the wood next to her bed. She grabbed her phone, squinting her eyes and groaning at the brightness of the screen before reading the text from Alex asking how she was doing. She replied that she felt “like shit” and “just woke up” before exiting the conversation and seeing Christen’s contact right below Alex’s.

“Shit.” She cursed to herself, seeing the messy words she sent the girl.

She let out a loud groan before stopping, realizing she was only making her headache worse.

She knew she had to send another message. She fucked up, big time. She didn’t want Christen being left with no explanation.

“Hey. I’m sorry about those messages. I fucked up. I guess I tend to keep doing that. Anyway, I’m sorry again. I hope you’re well.” She sent, her heart aching at the dullness of her message. She didn’t even think about her next action, though. She just did it.

“I do miss you, though. I love you, too. So much. I’m sorry, I know this isn’t fair to you. I just really needed to tell you that. I’ll leave you alone now.” The second message read.

It was the truth. She hated waking up every morning and not seeing the wild, dark, curly hair on both her pillow and Christen’s (because there was that much of it). She missed getting ready together in the mornings, making coffee together, dancing in the kitchen to their favorite songs with no pants on. She missed seeing Christen’s dirty Air Force 1s next to the door. Christen refused to put them anywhere else, hating a mess and insisting that everything had its place.

She sighed, locking her phone and moving to get out of bed. Then her phone vibrated again.

chris<3: please make sure you’re taking care of yourself.

Her eyes watered and she bit down on her bottom lip hard I'm attempts to stop the tears from spilling. She wanted her girl back. She had to be better.

______________________

took my heart to california

now it doesn’t work right

yeah, it beats and, yeah, it beats

but, damn, it hurts every night

you’re not lonely just because you are alone

but ever since we said goodbye

well, I just happen to be both

I took my heart to california and now it’s broken

Kelley called Tobin after Alex told her what was going on.

“Tobs, come stay with me for a bit. Get away from that house. It’s not doing you any good.” The freckled woman said gently.

“Kelley, you live in California. It’s too far.”

“No it’s not. Look, I’ll road trip and come pick you up and we can road trip back, too. Tobin, I think it’s best. We’ll even go surfing.”

“Kel, I’m not going to ask you to-”

“Tobin, I offered.”

Tobin let out a sigh. “Yeah, alright.”

///

Kelley was right. Being in that house wasn’t doing Tobin any good, but being away from it was worse. To Tobin, it was leaving behind everything she loved.

She laid in Kelley’s spare bedroom every night wishing she was sleeping in her own bed. The bed she shared with Christen. She missed the permanent dip in in it where Christen laid. She missed their corresponding coffee mugs, even if only one of them had been put to use lately. She missed the houseplants that Christen insisted on buying, and then making Tobin take care of.

California had none of that. California had Kelley. California had surfing. California didn't have Christen.

She took her heart to California and it kept trying to tug her back to Portland. Back to Christen, even though Christen wasn’t there. Her heart worked better in Portland. California just broke it even more.

///

“You’re sure you want to go back, dude?” Kelley’s face was concerned.

“I have to, Kelley.”

“I don't want you to be lonely-”

Tobin let out a laugh. It wasn’t a good one, either. It was laced with hurt and anger and resentment. “Christen left me. She left me alone. I think it’s a little late for that.”

“Hey, you have me and you have Alex. You’re not alone.”

“Yeah,” Tobin nodded, “Sorry I snapped.”

It was a lie. She was lonely. She was alone. She was lonely because she was alone. She wanted her girl back.

______________________

It had been three months since Christen left her. Three months since the girl of her dreams left her. Broke her.

She needed to find herself outside of Christen. She couldn't keep living like Christen would come back any moment now and everything would fall right back into place. Everything was out of place before she left, anyway.

So she started going out, and not like she did before. She went out to museums and art fairs and dog parks; anything but bars. She declined Alex’s company politely, insisting that she needed to be alone with herself.

She even started seeing a therapist. She knew she was fucked up. She knew Christen fucked her up even more. She knew she made a mistake trying to give Christen what she deserved when she wasn’t ready to give that to her.

So she saw a therapist to help her figure things out because another thing she knew for certain was that she loved Christen and she wanted to be better. If not just for herself, for Christen. Even if she couldn’t have her.

________________________

Three and a half weeks later, Tobin’s phone rang while she was doing dishes after dinner. She quickly dried her hands and was anxious when she looked at the screen that read ‘chris<3′ and displayed a goofy picture of the girl in a pink beanie, a gray hoodie (that was Tobin’s), black skinny jeans with holes in the knees, and a foot kicked up in the air, toe pointed, showing off her dirty Air Force 1s that she never left the house without.

She fumbled her phone a bit, hands not completely dry, and answered nervously. “Um, hello?” She felt like this was a prank. Maybe Christen accidentally butt dialed her. Maybe someone found her phone and-

“Hi.” Christen’s voice was soft and easy. When Tobin didn’t say anything, she spoke up again, “It’s me, uh, Christen.”

“Hi.” Tobin didn't know what else to say. Her heart twinged a little at the sound of Christen’s voice, but it warmed more than it hurt.

“Uh, so...” Christen took a long pause before she said, “You know what? Never mind. I’m sorry I called,” in a voice that worried Tobin.

“Hey, hey, no, Chris. What's up? Talk to me.” She couldn't stop herself from showing Christen that she still cared. She always would.

Christen let out a shaky breath. “Um, I don't know. I’m kind of in Portland right now. And I kind of really miss you. And I kind of really want to see you. But I also kind of know that I hurt you. A lot. And you hurt me. A lot. And I’m not sure what to do now.”

Her voice sounded scared but genuine. Tobin let out a short breath that she had been holding since Christen said she was in Portland.

“Can I come get you?”

“Tobin, I-”

“No, Chris. Please. Let me come get you. I promise, I’ll just take you to get coffee and we can talk and nothing more has to happen.”

Christen paused again and let out a small sigh. “Yeah. Okay. I’m actually kind of still at the airport.” Her voice was sheepish, knowing Tobin would catch on to the fact that she flew to Portland and called Tobin before anything else.

Tobin smiled but didn't mention anything about it. “Okay, Chris. I’ll be there in 20. Send me you're flight info so I know where I’m picking you up.”

“Okay. Hey, Tobs?”

“Yeah, Chris?” Tobin’s voice was hopeful after hearing Christen call her by her nickname again.

“Thank you. I kind of can’t wait to see you.”

Tobin was already grabbing her keys and putting on the first pair of shoes she could find as she smiled. “Can you wait 20 minutes, maybe?”

Christen laughed, “Yeah. Yeah I think I can do that. Thank you, again.”

“Always, Chris. Always.” Tobin smiled to herself before saying, “Hey?”

“Yeah?”

“I kind of can't wait to see you either.”

Christen couldn’t stop the smile that made her eyes squint. “20 minutes, Tobs.”

“20 minutes.” Tobin repeated. “I’ll see you then.”

“Okay, see you then. Bye.” Christen hung up just after Tobin said bye back.

“Holy shit.” Tobin said to herself as she backed out of her driveway.

///

“Departures, no. Uuuuuh, arrivals. Arrivals.” Tobin read the signs aloud as she drove into the airport, a nervous reaction she hadn't realized took over her.

When she caught sight of Christen exactly where the girl said she was, she smiled and pulled her car up to the curb, turning the engine off and getting out quickly.

By the time she was rounding the car, Christen was too. When they reached the trunk, they bumped into each other due to the fact that both their heads were down because they were too nervous to look at each other. They both groaned at the contact, holding different parts of their bodies before looking up at each other and laughing.

“Hi.” Tobin breathed out with a shy grin on her face.

“Hi.” Christen mimicked.

“Can I - Can I hug yo-”

Christen didn’t wait for her to finish her question before dropping her hand from holding her suitcase up and wrapping her arms around Tobin’s neck tightly. Tobin fumbled back a step before she returned the hug with equally as much force, wrapping her arms around Christen’s waist and burying her head in the girl’s shoulder.

“I missed you.” They said at the same time, laughing once again at the silliness of the situation.

“You want some coffee?” Tobin questioned after a few moments, voice muffled by Christen’s shoulder.

Christen only nodded into Tobin’s shoulder before pulling back. They separated slowly, shy smiles on both of their faces. Tobin popped the trunk open and lifted Christen’s very large suitcase (which had fallen over after Christen’s hands abandoned it to replace it with Tobin’s body) with ease. She was hopeful seeing that Christen seemed to have come back with as much as she left with, plus some. She shut the trunk closed, turning to the other girl again and grabbing one of her hands, giving it a squeeze along with a sweet smile before moving to get in the car.

///

Tobin held the door to the familiar coffee shop open for Christen and walked in behind her. She looked around for a second, thankful that it was mostly empty (with the exception of a few college kids studying with their headphones on). “Go get us our seats,” she nodded her head over to the small loveseat in the corner that they always sat in, “I’ll order. You want your usual?”

“Yeah, thank you.” Christen smiled before walking over to settle herself on the couch. She sat with one leg tucked under her and her hands in her lap. She played with her own fingers, nervous about the conversation that was about to happen, but so incredibly happy to see Tobin again.

Before she knew it, Tobin was walking back with two paper cups of coffee, steam coming out of the lids. The lighter-haired girl sat down in her spot, exactly the way Christen was seated with one leg under her, and facing the green-eyed girl. Her green-eyed girl (or so she hoped).

She handed Christen her cup, the girl muttering her thanks and immediately bringing the lid to her lips and taking a swig. Before Tobin could warn her that it was hot, the girl yelped out-

“Ow!”

“Woah, you okay?” Tobin pulled the cup from Christen’s face and looked at her worriedly.

“Yeah, I just forgot to blow on it.”

“You always do.” Tobin teased with a gentle smile.

Christen didn’t say anything, only taking her cup back from Tobin’s warm hands and nodding sadly at the memories of Tobin warning her to wait til the drink cooled down (and her never listening). Christen always pouted afterwards from the pain of the heat on her lips. “Babe, I told you to wait,” Tobin would always say. “Kiss it better for me?” Christen would ask with puppy eyes. And Tobin would. She would kiss her so softly, taking all the pain away, and say “Always,” before kissing her another time and pulling away.

“You forgot to warn me.” Christen’s voice was quiet and sad.

Tobin looked at her like she could break any moment now. “Yeah, I did. I’m sorry,” she choked out.

Christen didn't dare ask her to kiss it better like she normally would. They weren't there yet. No matter how much they both wanted to be.

Tobin cleared her throat, trying her hardest not to cry, but Christen saw the tears building in her eyes anyway. She let Tobin take a moment to pull herself together.

“I’m sorry.” Tobin choked out again.

“I know. I’m sorry, too.”

“No, you have nothing to be sorry for. You were right. I didn't show you I cared enough. You deserve so much more than what I gave you.” She was crying now. She didn't feel like trying to hold it back at this point. Her therapist told her not to.

Christen was surprised. Tobin hardly ever cried. The day she left was one of the few times she had seen the girl’s tears.

Her heart broke for the girl, seeing her so vulnerable in such an open setting. She sighed, grabbing one of Tobin’s hands, letting them rest on the girl’s lap. “We weren’t ready.”

Tobin only shook her head and kept crying.

“Tobin.” Christen said sadly.

She shook her head again, tears still falling down her cheeks and finally looking up to meet green eyes. “I’m so sorry, Chris. I’m so fucking sorry for what I put you through, I begged you to stay too many times and I wasn’t making you happy. I was hurting you every time I asked you to stay. When you left, I realized how shitty it was for me to do that. I didn't deserve you. You deserve better than me.”

“Tobin, stop. Stop saying I deserve better than you, in the present tense.”

“You do.”

“Are you telling me that Alex was lying to me when she called and said you changed for the better? Have you not? Should I go back to New York, because Tobin, I really can’t put myself through that pain again.”

Tobin stopped breathing so heavily for a second and furrowed her eyebrows. “Alex called you?”

Christen realized she accidentally let the secret slip, but she didn’t really care. “Yeah. She called me last week and said you’d changed and I should come home. I was hesitant. I didn't know what to think. But she told me you’re going places alone to better yourself. And she told me you’re seeing a therapist. I hope that’s okay.”

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s fine,” Tobin sniffled, “I’m sorry she called you. She had no right.”

Christen shook her head with a gentle smile. “I’m kind of glad she did.” She squeezed Tobin’s hand again, enjoying the warmth she found in it.

There were a lot of kind of’s happening. Tobin didn’t know what to make of it. So she just squeezed back.

“Would you have come back if she hadn't called?” Tobin’s eyes dropped again, staring at their conjoined hands on her lap.

Christen let out a deep breath through her nose and rested her head sideways against the back of the loveseat sofa. “I don't know. I think maybe eventually. I needed to know you were okay. After that night that you texted me at four in the morning-”

Tobin winced, “Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay. It’s in the past. After that night, I would occasionally text Alex to check on you. I didn't want to text you and give you false hope that I was coming back. I didn't know what I wanted at that point. But I think coming back was always in the back of my mind. I just needed time.” The last sentence sounded all too familiar to Tobin, but she was glad this time it was in the past tense. “It hurt me hearing how hurt you were,” Christen continued, “I hated knowing I did that to you-”

“I hurt you first. I deserv-”

“Tobin, don't you dare say you deserved me hurting you back. You know you didn't.”

Tobin nodded but didn’t say anything. Christen took that as her chance to continue.

“I hated knowing that I did that to you. But, I needed to. I couldn't stay when it was hurting me like that. I’m sorry I hurt you, but I needed to take care of myself.”

“I’m sorry for hurting you, too. I'm glad you left to take care of yourself. Don't get me wrong. I was hurt. Am hurt? I don't know. Am hurt, I guess. But I’m glad you did it for yourself. I’m glad you gave yourself what I couldn't give you.”

They stayed silent for a few moments, taking in each other’s apologies.

“Tobin. I’m back. I’m back because I have faith in you. You hurt me but I still have faith that you're better than that. I know you can be better than that. I just don't want to get hurt again. I missed you. I missed you so fucking much that I couldn't sleep at night without you holding me and scratching my back like you used to. My coffee didn't taste the same because you weren’t the one making it. My heart hurt without you with me. I thought it would go away, but it didn’t. I still miss you. I still love you,” Tobin’s breath caught in the back of her throat at that. Those were the words she longed to hear for nearly four months. The words that made her heart flutter and break at the same time, “just please don’t hurt me like that again.” Christen pleaded with tears of her own on her cheeks now.

Tobin shook her head furiously. “Never. God, I couldn't live without you, Chris. I don't deserve a second chance-”

“God, Tobin, stop. Stop saying shit like that. You do. You might have hurt me but you loved me too. You loved me a whole lot and I felt it. I’m sorry for saying the shitty things I did. Let me come back to you. Let me give you a second chance.”

They were both sobbing at this point. They abandoned their drinks on the small table in front of them to be able to hold each other with both hands.

“Are you sure?” Tobin asked hesitantly, looking between both of the green eyes.

“If you’ve changed the way Alex says you have and you’re willing to keep working on us, yes. I’m sure.”

Tobin grabbed the girl’s shoulders and pulled her into a bone-crushing hug. Christen accepted it and reciprocated. They stayed like that for a moment, basking in each other’s love.

“Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you so much. I’m going to do everything I can to give you what you deserve this time around. I don’t want to ever let you go again.”

“Please don’t.” Christen cried out.

Tobin pulled her head back, resting her forehead against Christen’s and holding her face in both of her hands. “Never. Never again. I’m never letting you go again.”

“Kiss me, you fool.”

That was all it took for Tobin to crash her lips onto Christen’s. It was salty and wet and kind of gross. It was also full of love and hurt and ‘I kind of really missed you.’ But all too soon, Christen let out another “ow” in pain.

Tobin pulled back quickly. “What? What happened baby?”

Christen swooned at the affectionate name. “Sorry. Just, my lip still hurts from the burn.” They laughed, cheeks still wet and eyes still red.

“Can I kiss it better?” Tobin asked, taking Christen’s usual line.

“Always.” Christen whispered before letting Tobin kiss her pain away again.

______________________

a/n: so it was actually a breakup/make up fic I guess. Hope you enjoyed it. Leave me asks and let me know how I did:) thanks for reading!

#preath #preath fanfic #preath fanfiction #preath fic #christen press #tobin heath #woso #woso fanfic #woso fanfiction #woso fic #uswnt #au

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internetremix · 5 years

Note

If you guys could be any non Legendary Pokemon, what would you be and why?

2This one ended up VERY LONG so discussion below the cut:

Kristen: Um. Oh no this is hard. My kneejerk reaction to these is always Mew because Mew is my favorite Pokemon. Smol kickass pink cat, excellent.Phill: Bidoof. Easy. Hands down objectively best PokemonKristen: I'm just imagining Bidoof with a Phill beard now. Amazing. BUT I CANNOT PICK A LEGENDARY POKEMON SO. Uh. Um. I mean Charizard is super cool and then I could be a big badass dragon but like I CAN'T BE A BIG?? THAT WOULD BE HARD I'd probably be super clumsy and burn shit. ...So I also can't be Fletchling cause then I'm also gonna burn shit on accident. Dragonair is super neat but like THEY LONG I feel like I'd get tangled up. Espeon and Umbreon are cool?? Uh maybe an Espeon?? They seem too cool for me. I'm bad at this, I haven't played Pokemon in like a million years and I get self conscious every time I pick something cool cause I'm like "no I'd fuck up being cool". Slyveon maybe?? My fiance just said I'd be a Plusle but I don't accept it.

...fuck it Espeon. Espeon is neat but also it cute fuck it live ur dreams to be kinda cool.Atwas: It's okay Kristen. Charizard is only 5'7". But I guess even that would be a massive jump in height. :^)Kristen: ListenAtwas: :^)Kristen: RudeUprising: idk what i would BE, i know my favorite pokemon but thats chepap. my brother said shiny alolan ninetails bc it is pink, white, and has flowy hair so that sounds accurate.Alex: My favorite pokemon is magikarp but i would probably be exploudKristen: And now I'm just imagining Magikarp with Alex's hair.Jojo: ugh. why do you have to ask me this. now I have to get out my list of literally every pokemon... Either Eevee, Dratini, or Chatot. OR RIOLU! riolu is a goodie. I have a feeling Scott would be a Buneary but that's not my place to say.Kristen: Good choices JoojJojo: /);w;(\Split: Kristens a torchic that never evolves lmaoKristen: NO ...maybe.Jojo: I actually thought about it. I have the perfect pokemon for youKristen: ...alright, hit me.Alex: Ok.

Kristen: OW! Alex why? ;A;Alex: You said hit me.Split: PffffhahahaJojo: #742, Cutiefly.

Kristen: ...I mean. It is smol and blonde, which I currently am.Split: Yep. It you. Congrats.Kristen: SIGH I mean. It’s very cute.Jojo: By the way I think that’s it’s actual size.Split: LMAOJojo: OH MY GOD IT’S LITERALLY KRISTEN

Kristen: NOSplit: I call being the trainer of this band of misfitsKristen: I’M SMOL BUT NOT THAT SMOL!Jojo: You are that smol.Split: Joj shes like an inch or two shorter than youJojo: NO?? SHE’S LIKEKristen: HA!Jojo: SHH! THAT’S NOT TRUEKristen: IT’S TOTALLY TRUEAlex: "The wild Kristen eats approximately ten times her body weight each day"Split: If only.Jojo: ohmygodkristenI found your other one

Kristen: NOSplit: Joj that ones youKristen: He's right it's smol and blueAlex: yeah that's youJojo: NO IM A RIOLUSplit: Which one was thatAlex: babby lucarioJojo: That boy

Split: But are you sureJojo: YES THAT'S MEKristen: Why do you get to be the cool oneAlex: i still think dratini is best choice for jojKristen: I agree.Split: Are you baby martial artist or baby huggy bearJojo: I AM STRONG YOU FUCKAlex: huggy bear it isSplit: But do you fightJojo: YESSplit: BullshitJojo: DUKE UP YOU CHEEKY POPPETSplit: AightKristen: I can't believe Jooj is a huggy bearJojo: NoOooOo IM DRATINISplit: Thats the snake one right? The long blue dragon snake.Alex:

Jojo: yeSplit: Oh yuh thats also joj. I still think huggy bear but ill settle for dratini.Jojo: even looks like my fursona holy shitSplit: Secrets outJojo: MOTHERFUCKER YOU HUUGGY BEAR. it's not really a secret anymoreSplit: It never wasssssKristen: I can't believe Jojo gets to be a fucking dragon and I'm a tiny fly that eats 10 times its bodyweight. Oh it's bug/fairy. I guess that's interesting.Jojo: hehehefairyAlex: real talk i based it on the math that an average human eats 2.5 kg of cooked food per dayKristen: Huh, interestingSplit: We gave you so many options other than the .4 inch bug thing kristenKristen: ....I mean I can see Cutiefly, Fletching or Torchick tbhJojo: OH MY GOD LOOK AT THIS ABSOLUTE UNIT

HIS NAME. IS BUZZSWOLE.Kristen: lmao that looks like a Digimon. Is that real?Walrus: He is real. And he will punch your spirit.Kristen: SOUNDS FAKE BUT OKAlex: you question the might of our lord and savior buzzwoleJojo: no he'll punch everything and then literally use your spirit as a sweat rag! LOOK AT THIS FUCKIN JOJO ASS CHARACTER!Split: It took me a whole 2 seconds to realize you meant the anime and not yourself(edited)Alex: our joj does have bizarre adventures to be fairSplit: You right you rightJojo: :,)Split: I could just hear your soul crackJojo: I'm glad. anyway look at this other kristen pokemon.

Kristen: No, I am drawing the line, no. You can't keep googling "what's the most harmless looking dust mote of a pokemon" and then say IT'S KRISTENJojo: NOO THAT'S NOT TRUE I'll tell you what. if you were a legendary pokemon you'd be Jirachi. that mf is p o w e r f u lKristen: Aw gosh. Wait didn’t we say MG would be edgy jirachi?Alex: her original character a jirachi-darkrai fusionJojo: I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT DARKRAI or a very smol GiratinaKristen: I do not know enough about this pokemon to comment.Alex: Giratina is Pokemon Satan.Kristen: Ah. Okay. Of course. Of course Pokemon Satan is a thing.Alex:

Kristen: ...Oh it’s MG.Split: I distinctly remember pokemon satan ending up being a good guyJojo: so was darkraiKristen: I can't believe you just spoiled DMP and now I gotta cancel it.Alex: Satan: He's An Alright Guy!Split: P sure darkrai killed kidsKristen: ...it's fine don't worry about itAlex: Movie Darkrai was alright I thought? There are a whole lot of child murderin' pokemon out there to be fair.Split: Oh movie darkrai was futily attempting to stop the collapse of the universeIf i remember rightJojo: he also became attached to a childSplit: Big shrug on that sub plot its been yearsAlex: we have one hundred percent abandoned the original question. welcome to internet remixKristen: Yeeeep. Getting back on topic, I think Split would be Absol or Houndoom.Jojo: OOOOHHH I didn’t even think of AbsolSplit: Nah im the trainer

Alex: but consider: girafarigSplit: What isAlex: mostly i chose it because "aesthetic"

Kristen: PFFFT HAHAHASplit: Nah. Meanwhile, Kristen callin out my favorite pokemon as a kid. Regardless ive already grabbed a hat, tell tale sign of any trainer. Ive started walking the path every 13 year old must walk in their livesKristen: Pretty sure trainers start at 10?Split: Nah i mean im leaving my region for new boundsKristen: So brave. Anyway I’m trying to think of others. I'm trying to think of others. My brain keeps telling me that Alex is Entei. Tol and floofy and can burn things. But that's a legendary.Jojo: oooo I think he had a good pick of exploud. Buuut I also think he'd be an Ursaring.

Dawn: For me I tried to think of literally any water pokemon for me but lets be real here

Alex: I mean.Dawn: b0rfJuno: If I could be any nonlegendary mon it would be Golurk1) Giant Robot2) Can fly with rocket boosters3) Causes earthquakesTex: Umm. Hm. Something that was a mix of fire, dragon, and psychic. Like I know u can't get three. But listen.Walrus: w-walrein exists. so i meanJuno: MY TIME HAS COME

Walrus: HAHHhhhhWHEN THE FUCKHUHWHATI FORGOT OR DIDN'T SEE THISHONAtwas: YO that's so fucking cool! To answer the prompt, I'd probably be a Zoroark.Kristen: Good choices.Scott: Could BE a non-legendary?Jojo: Hold on wait. let me guess: bunearyScott: No, that's what I would want to HAVE. Hm. This is actually tough. Maybe Altaria? It's a flying Pokemon that sings beautiful melodies and has a relatively average speed.I don't know. I'd want to be a Pokemon that was kind and graceful with musical qualities, if at all possible. So yeah, I guess AltariaKristen: I can see that.Juno: Also you're fluffyShyner: Hooooly shit there's a lot of stuff hereI feel bad about adding to this massive wall of content but I'm just putting down for the record that I would definitely be basic bitch eevee. I'll change my form for you, just please love me :,)Kristen: ;A; I LOVE EEVEE JUST THE WAY EEVEE ISJuno: eevee... babey

#whole crew #ask the ir crew #JESUS THIS IS LONG #Anonymous

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sundrenched-smilez · 5 years

Note

I see your 'here's a lot!' and raise you: 1, 3-6, 10-13, 17-19, 21, 23, 25

1. what is your gender?

dainty + bubbly

sharp

ethereal

decadent

3. what is your gender presentation like?

being genderfluid, it’s difficult tbh, and i dont always know what my gender is at any given moment? only what feels Wrong and Uncomfy. so i just gotta trial and error until i get tired of doing that and give up, or i find smth good. this can take several minutes expressing the above feelings and aesthetics is essentially my gender pres

4. what is your Gender Euphoria Outfit?

d+b - smth flowy, soft, traditionally more girly and femme

sharp - punk, black and spiky. metal helps, so do bracelets, and sometimes eyeliner done to a point. mb a lil slutty, but for me, not for others. tank tops, torn clothing, showing skin

ethereal - the above, but more adorned and colorful? like rly unique and confident looks. less edges, more fae

decadent - like shirts w ruffles on them, feeling like a pirate or an old century princess, loose clothes, fancy clothes, feeling a lil like royalty or thinking highly of myself. mb more animated w my actions, more dancy

5. what makes you feel validated?

ppl using my pronouns, or telling their friends “oh look at that person, theyr’e goals/theyre pretty/so hot, etc” and impressing ppl w my beauty and style that way.

ppl not knowing what genitals i have, or being confused on that front!! like i’ve told ppl im on hormones n they assumed T instead of estrogen, and that’s fun. kinda like how u like to confuse ppl

6. top five favorite parts of your body (n why you love them)?

thighs!! they’re rly good n have recently gotten thiccer bc i put on weight, and that makes me happy c:

i have a cute butt!!

boobs, bc ive always wanted them, nd i have them now, nd im big sexy

legs, esp when shaven, bc that always feels nice. so does my tummy, it’s rl soft

i love my eyes so much, they’re such a dark, deep warm brown!!! they rllllyyy pop when i wear eyeliner w them, and im always consistently happy abt them c: i also have good lips, nd suuuuper soft skin

im cheating but i also rly adore my hair, it gets rly curly sometimes, and i love that abt it

10. do you have any trans pride merch?

i dont!! i have a gay flag in my room tho c:

11. recent happy trans moment?

at work yesterday, i had mentioned customers probs find me offputting bc im tall and trans, and my friend josh who i work w, was like “use that to your advantage!! I know that sounds weird, but when i wear a flower crown, it’s easier to sell to ppl, bc im the Bubbly Gay” and i was like “hi, i dont have the genitals you think i do, please buy my fragrance” in a deadpan voice, n cracked him and my manager up

12. favorite trans headcanon?

samus aran from metroid being trans!! shes powerful and unstoppable, and i love her

13. favorite canon trans character? (alt: 2nd favorite trans headcanon?)

i rly love elliot from On A Sunbeam, but also alex fierro from the magnus chase series!!! she’s never afraid to let ppl know when her pronouns have changed (genderfluid) and she’s out and proud, and promotes “flaunting the weird” or unique, and she always wears pink n green, which is cool. like everyone was in white snow suits for camouflage, and she still had a pink/green one somehow, nd it was rly silly

17. something you wish you could tell your younger self?

brush ur teeth more, also dont worry, ppl will love ur dick and wont bash u for having one. you’ll have friends that love and want to b around u

18. what would your Ideal Fashion Look be?

i rly want that rose dress i drew on zuretta, mb i’ll try sewing one when i have money

19. (how) does your gender relate to your sexuality?

if u like me, ur gay, and also i rly want someone (partner wise) to call me their flame, bc that would b rly affirming and gay. like im an urban/modern pirate witch who strolls into town on odd full moons, bringing lavish gifts and showering my love in affection, sex, and laughteri like the concept of sex more than actual sex, but u know,,,, some gay thoughts

21. what makes you feel euphoric?

when i can express my genders the way i want to, or express/hold myself in a way that rly makes me all !!!!!! inside

like a firm and steady connection, resonating in my aesthetic like a beacon or a lightning strike; powerful, brimming with energy, and certainty.

23. claim something as trans culture.

running a joke into the ground until it's unrecognizable from what the original one was (i’m about to end this man’s whole career > me, about to fight someone “i’m about to end this man” >me answering if i’ve entered the building yet “i’m about to” > me, when i’m a muscle underneath someone’s stomach fat “i’m ab”)

editing ur friends into memes

25. what’s your favorite part of being trans?

tbh i dont rly identify as trans, just nb, bc ive always felt nonbinary; used to b rly grossed out by being called anything masculine, felt uncomfortable to take my shirt off from the age of like 6, in public spaces. called myself an individualso like im definitely not cis but i’ve always been nonbinary, so i dont feel the need to categorize myself into like “someone who isn’t as they used to be” if that makes sense.

plus idk, uncomfy term for me specifically, doesn’t feel right. same w transfeminine, like im androgynous in the first place, and if i were feminine, i dont see the need 2 arbitrarily add trans in front of it, as if to say “im artificial”obvs those terms r affirming for others, and im rly happy abt that and encourage them to use em, but for me its just like. mmm. thats how it feels, a lil nasty nd not me. wrong, ig? feelings. its 1 am almost so im in a slightly off mindset, but also fine bc i just took like a big nap from 3:30ish to 8no gender roles, im free of constriction and can dress however tf i want bc fuck fashion trends? its just money in the pocket of a corporation. now i do like fashion, but only in that i love to see how ppl express themselves, not so much following trends and rules abt it. it’s better to b unique and have ur own style, what makes u u, what makes u comfy and happily expressed

#abt me #cassette tapes #asks

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sinto-hell · 6 years

Text

boys n fashion

i have uuuuuh very specific ways to imagine how the boys look because i’m never satisfied with canon and i Cannot Fucking Draw™ and i scream a lot about fashion so (mostly because what the fuck is fashion sense in otome i’m looking at u dmmd what the FUCK were those yellow socks and that jacket AN ALSO NOIZ’S ENTIRE FUCKING OUTFIT IM SO ANGRY) anyway this got a bit out of hand lmao i love clothes

nathaniel

LOTS OF SWEATERS

wears a shirt under his sweater with the collar poping out

“preppy” but not frat boy preppy. like comfy casual pretty. soft n warm like marshmallow. he looks soft but he could easily deck u into next week

lots warm cardigans

lots of light wash jeans. doesn’t really wear black or dark colored jeans. also always cuff his jeans

white adidas are the shoes he usually wears to school

he fucking despises flannels they’re the ugliest thing in his opinion

owns a lot of scarves; never wear any of them

he knows he looks good in stripes so he has a lot of stripped shirt

hoodies are for lazy days

one (1) pair of black ripped knees jeans. usually pair them with a creme sweater

also tries to make his hair behave but he just. can’t. so he tries to make it fashionably disheveled.

owns one of those jacket thats like denim but the sleeves and the inside are like a regular sweater and theres a hood god i want one of those

probably has glasses he wears to read

(i remember i saw an artist that basically drew him dressed like this but i cant remember their name so there’s that)

castiel

boi is a punk

his wardrobe is 90% band shirt, they’re literally almost all he wears

owns 4 my chemical romance shirt

he has two denim jacket: one black with various pins and small patch on it and one light wash with a big ass misfits patch on the back

also probably found his leather jacket in a thrift store

unironically buys those bad translation shirt that says shit like “try my delicious salt beef” or “way the bridge i burn high the way” credit to @mclfutarinotamashi for that one

90% of his band shirts are really worn out because he wears them so much

owns a pair of og black converse and red doc martens

usually always has his roots showing and has taken a liking in tying his hair in a half bun. sorta. but he mostly live in his natural bedhead

lys once braided his hair and he didn’t like it on him but he thought it was really relaxing

has a fuckton of spiked bracelet and rubber band bracelets, but only wears one or two at a time nowadays. he used to wear a lot more. like. a lot.

black jeans all the way

also ripped jeans

also own two or three big sweater, and one of them his hands just. disappear when he wear it.

lysander

don’t get me wrong i love the victorian fashion but;; it aint realistic

peg leg trousers. google it. he’d wear the heck out of that.

owns a lot of fancy black pants

he has those weird pants i’ve been looking for, they’re high waisted and really flowy and they’re called culottes. his are black with white stripes and he owns a black only version

he totally owns a green velvet skirt fight me on this

has a lot of scarves and wears them all

has a simple but very nice pair of brown boots for casual days and fucking 5 inches new rocks platform shoes with buckles all over for when he’s extra

a true Goth™

lots of turtlenecks and long sleeve black shirts. did i mention turtlenecks

he totally owns this sweater in green and black

he loves high waisted pants

plays a bit on androgyny, as he knows he’s pretty tall, but also very delicate so skirt are the fucking shit on him

owns a trench-like coat. with a hood. also long cardigans

sometimes when he’s extra he’ll play a bit into the steam punk territory

experiment a bit with makeup, but only on his eyes, he still shy away from lipstick

he braid his hair to sleep so it has nice waves the next day. cares a lot about his hair actually

also basically how @veroww dresses him what a babe

armin

oh boi what a mess

lots and lots of hoodies and generally clothes with hoods so he can hide in them and sleep

literally owns this and that (i have that one and it makes me look like a jedi, so another reason why he’d wear it)

nerd shirts. you know the type.

like he has 3 pokemon shirts and 4 marvel. alexy will not let him go out of the house wearing those. the only one hes allowed to be seen with in public is his star wars one

and fucking memes shirt

like he probably has a white shirt with a shiba inu on it

got that shirt that says “why be racist, sexist, homophobic and transphobic when you could just be quiet” with alexy so they match

one of these guys that only wears black skinny jeans or sweatpants

basically nerdy emo

has like. 2 pair of shoes. really dirty vans that he wear everywhere and a nice pair of boots for like. ass kicking purpose. kidding alex probably made him buy them

“vans or converse?” “vans what the fuck am i an animal”

probably owns a trasher hoodie (ok now thats me projecting bc i headcanon the only sport he can kind of do is skating so) (beside SK8ER BOI ARMIN AM I RIGHT)

also yes, a lot of beanies

anything comfortable, really; doesn’t really own a lot of fancy or statement pieces he wears regularly.

kentin

alex is right ok the military pants looks great and he probably has a great ass in it but jesus boy please change up ur game

i actually haven’t thought a lot about his fashion sense probs because i dont write him as often as the twins or cas or do i thirst over lys

but @ne-neptune has drawn him with glasses and a big jacket today and im lov

probably owns a carhatt jacket thats a bit too big on him

rolls up his sleeves. always. wether his shirts are long sleeves or short sleeves. he. rolls them up. sip sip THEM ARMS THO

wears a concerning amount of beige and green.

LIKES KNITTED SWEATERS OK. HE IS SOFT™

has a camo jacket

wears a lot of baggy pants but is also warmin up to more slim jeans, (not skinny bc its too tight and he doesn’t understand how armin and castiel do it) bc he knows his ass looks gr8

finally bought himself a new pair of fancy glasses he think he look ok with. hint: he’s both cute & fucking hot with them and everyone is thirsty.

combat boots all the way. he does own a pair of old converse that are seriously starting to be worn out, but he still wears them sometimes

alexy because i fucking can

now that’s my B O I

Thriftshop Fashionista™

seriously this boy love thrifstores. he once fucking found gucci shit in there. he’s lucky.

vintage/90s clothes aesthestic.

lightwash jeans with a big belt, weird dad shirt tucked into his jeans

HE TUCKS HIS SHIRT IN HIS JEANS

AND ALSO CUFF THEM WHAT A FASHION ICON

probably also own some peg leg trousers like lysander

his favourite pair of jeans is one he found in a really sketchy store, theres hole at the knees and the bottom of the legs are ripped and there are flower patches going down the entire left side (fun fact: one of my friend has these exact pant he found in a thriftsore and every time he wears them i’m just like. vogue is shook. what a fucking look. fashion icon.)

also probably owns a sweater with roses embroidery

has like 4 denim jacket, each very different; one with patches all over it, one with a giant gay flag on the back, one black with rips in it, and one plain light wash

has one of those weird flashy colored 90s jacket that’s like baby blue and bright orange. it was his mom’s. he stole it from his mom. she let him keep and re question her fashion choices every time he wears it.

weird 90s and dad shirt are his shit. also really big sweaters. weird colors. this boy own a purple knitted sweater with a yellow wolf patch on the back. rosalya hates it. he probably bought it out of spite.

also owns vans. and a pair of combat boots. and a pair of converse. and one pair of black high heels. and orange sneakers. and brown fancy leather boots. and-

he probably steals armin’s trasher hoodie for the aesthetic

also steals his beanies bc what he has like 10

loves embroidered clothes or things with patches or weird flower designs on them

also big ass red sunglasses worn ironically.

vogue is fucking shook by this boy

and that’s all folks

#my candy love #mcl #mcl nathaniel #mcl castiel #mcl lysander #mcl armin #mcl alexy #mcl kentin #mcl headcanon #fashion #i did;; a lot for alex and lys #but u know #theyre the most fashionable in canon so i built on that

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julmar123 · 6 years

Text

Spn convention

Summery: I decided to make this imagine after I was binge watching a ton of panels with the cast of supernatural so this imagine is about SPN conventions and panels where the reader is a cast member and is an actress in supernatural and their character is a young hunter. Also mentions of stranger things. Y/n is for your name and y/cu/n is your cousin name and y/c/n is for your character’s name in supernatural

You and your cousin where rolling down the airport in Vancouver towards Las Vegas. You usually carried her around. She was like your assistant but not really she was just there so you didn’t have to be alone all the time. The both of you where sitting down waiting to board the plane. The rest of the cast had left to the convention together but you had misplaced your passport which is why it was just the two of you. “Hey y/n you look so nervous is this your first convention?” Your cousin asked you. You look up from your phone and smile “yes it’s my first supernatural convention, if it wasn’t for me forgetting my passport we would already be on our way.” You say making her laugh lightly. “It’s alright I’m sure you’ll be fine” she says trying to make you feel better. “Yeah I’m just nervous because the fans are very dedicated and well I’m new to the show” you start to say but she interrupts you. “Stop it! You are great on the show and that must be a reason why your on the show on the first place” she tells you taking her arm and pulling you close. You two sit there and until you board the private jet.

Once you arrive at the Las Vegas airport you take a picture with your cousin and post it on Snapchat and Instagram. With the caption “we out here Vegas” you are taken to the hotel by a shuttle bus. You and your cousin head into the hotel room and decide to get some room service and have a relaxing night in since the con didn’t start til the next day. When you get a face time call from Misha. You answer it

“Hola Mish what’s up” you say confused by the call. “Hola y/n hey so a bunch of us are down to go to a karaoke bar do you two wanna tag along?” He asks you smile at him as you see the group of familiar faces all sat around the hotel room. “Actually guys I just got in, and I wanna get some sleep before tomorrow morning “ you start to say but you can see some very disappointed faces. “I knew she would say no” you hear Jensen’s voice. “Oh come on y/n just for a little while” says Rob. You look up at your cousin who is nodding and smiling at the idea. “Alright you losers we’ll be down in a bit.” You say joking around with the group. They all cheer in unison. You change from your airport outfit which consisted of jogger sweats and a T-shirt. You put on a pair of high waisted jeans and a white lace crop top with a pair of boots. You decide to put some make up on and leave your hair in a braid. You and your cousin go to Misha’s rooms where everyone is pregaming. You knock and the door Jared opens the door. “Hey come on in” he says engulfing you in hug. One by one you hug the people in the room. “Alright ladies and gents we’re all here now let’s roll” says Richard. After a couple of drinks and songs you and your cousin decide to take an Uber back to the hotel and rest up for the convention.

The next morning you wake up take a shower and get ready for the convention it was going to be a rather busy day. You blow dry your hair and decide to get some beachy waves. And some natural all day full coverage makeup with a nude lipstick. You put on another pair of high waisted jeans and a navy blue crop top with black beads and a pair of thigh high black swaid boots with a chunky heel. You look at yourself in the full length mirror. “You look great y/n I really like your blouse” says your cousin as she is finishing her make up. “You really think so you don’t think it’s too much?” You ask her as you continue to look at yourself. “Nope you look good “ she says. Once she is done you both follow a volunteer and head downstairs to the lobby where a shuttle bus was waiting to take the crew out to the convention area. You smile as you see Brianna and Kim waiting for everyone else. “Wow y/n looking hot babe” says Brianna taking you in a hug. “Good morning ladies” You say as you hug keep Kim. “Do you want some coffee?” Ask Kim handing you a cup and another for your cousin. “Thanks” You say in unison. “So where is everyone else?” You ask confused before you take a sip. “I’m not sure all I heard is that some of us actually got some sleep while others had a crazy night “ says Brianna. “Let me guess all the boys stayed up and partied didn’t they?” You ask as both of them nodded yes. “Ah not me I actually got sleep”you turn and see Alex he smiled at all of you and wrapped an arm around your shoulder. “You wrap another around his waist. The four of you take a picture on your Snapchat and post it to your story. Most of the fans shipped your character with jack on the show because your character had a huge crush on him. So you and Alex spent a lot of time together in order to build that chemistry, that sometimes the fans would ship you too in real life, although it was all platonic of course. As you waited for the rest of the cast you dranked on your coffee and talked with the castes they arrived. Once everyone had arrived you take the bus to the convention center and head towards your photo booth. You grab your phone to make sure you looked photo ready and you can hear a crowd of people who are in line. You walk up and wave at everyone who is in line. One by one you take pictures with ur fans some holding hands others making funny faces. It always made you happy to take pictures with all of your fans.

“Alright y/n you have a panel right after Misha and Jensen. And it’s just you and Alex then it’s your solo panel across the convention center and thenfinally you have a signing session” Says your cousin reading off a list. She takes you towards the main panel room where you can hear Misha and Jensen. You spot Alex and hug him from behind. Wrapping your arms around his waist. “Hey y/n you ready for this?” He asks you as he turns around. You let go and smile. Just then the music starts and you see Jensen and MIsha walk out of the velvet curtains. They hug you as you and Alex pass by. You wait until Richard announces you and Alex. “Now please give a warm welcome to the beautifully amazingly multitalented y/n y/l/n and the equally as esthetically pleasing and also quite talented Alex Calvert” says Richard through the microphone and you hear the crowd go wild. He puts his hand on the small of your back and guilds you into the stage where a ton of flashing lights go off. You smile and walk taking a set next to Alex on a chair. “Alright spn family!” Says Alex super excited and the crowd starts up again. “So this is y/n’s first panel, so let’s be nice” he adds making you smile. “Alright so for those of you with questions there are two microphones on each side of the room” you says pointing to them. “Let’s get started. “ says Alex.

Fan: “my question is for Alex do you think Jack also has feelings for y/n’s character?”

You turn to look at Alex and wait for his answer

He looks at you winks and smiles making the crowd scream. You smile back at him and blush

Alex: “I think that to an extent he does have mutual feelings for her but he still doesn’t know what thoes feelings are so he’s trying to figure them out. All he knows is that she was nice to him even after she found out that he was the son of Lucifer” he says. “Thank you for your question” he add before turning to the other side of the room.

Fan: “I just want to say that I love your characters on the show and my question is for both of you...what is the best part about being on a show like supernatural?”

Alex point at you to start the first.

You: “well to me... I’ve always been a huge fan of the show way before I was ever a part of the show I was a part of the fandom. I think that being on a show that I admire so much is a huge blessing and also a dream come true, not many people get to say that they are on a tv show that they love to watch. And just being able to work with a bunch of genuinely nice people is a pretty good time except when Jared decides it’s time for a prank on set” You say and the crowd laughs at the last part of your answer.

Alex: “yeah I agree with that I think that the show has such a good crew behind the scenes made up of great people and an even better fan base” he adds to you answer. “Thanks for the question” he says before turning to the other side.

Fan: “hello, my question is for y/n I was wondering if you could tell us about any pranks that j2 have pulled on you?”

You look to Alex who is laughing.

You: “well I don’t get pranked much anymore because I like to prank back and it gets a little to intense on set but there was one time where I was supposed to be in a scene with Jensen and Jared and it was supposedly be this really emotional scene for my character and Jared was supposed to stand behind me and he kept distracting me by trying to braid my hair but I didn’t brake character” you start to say and Alex jumps in. “He tangled her hair up so bad “ he says making the crowd laugh. You laugh with them. “Yeah it was awful I had to sit in a makeup chair for about an hour just to get the stupid braid off and then another 30 minutes just to get the hair to look decent for the shoot. I was soo mad at him” You say. Before thanking the fan for the question and turning to the other side.

Fan: “my question is “what has been the craziest thing a fan has said or given you?”

Alex: “hmm I’m not sure I don’t think I’ve gotten anything too crazy” he says looking at you.

You: “I don’t think I have either like I will occasionally get stopped to take pictures but nothing weird for the most part you guys are really nice and respectful “ you add with a smile thank the fan and turn again.

Fan: “hello I just want to say thank you for being here this is so cool. My question is for y/n, it was just announced that you would be in the newest season of stranger things, does that mean that you will no longer be involved with supernatural?”

You: “hmm okay yeah so the thing is that stranger things doesn’t start filming until mid May and we stop filming in about two weeks so with that being said I will still be a part of supernatural it’s just that I’ll be working on stranger things in Atlant when our last half of the season airs on tv and then come right back in the summer to film the new season of supernatural.” You say

Alex: “are you allowed to tell us anything about stranger things?” He asks you making the crowd loud again.

You: “nope.. not yet All I know is that I got a part in the show and that I’ll be wearing some crazy 80’s wardrobe “ You say.

Alex:”cool next question?” He asks

Fan: “what do u think Sam and Dean would say if jack and y/c/n got together as a couple?” She asks making the crowd cheer again.

Alex: “I’ll take this question” he says looking at you. “I think Sam would be happy for the Jack and Dean would be angry why because sams like the really nice cool big brother who will give his support while Dean is the overprotective older brother, I also think he would be confused about Y/c/n liking Jack, because she is also a hunter and acknowledges that Jack could be dangerous” he says and you add “hey y/c/n likes danger” you add making everyone laugh. “Oh of course she does she’s a hunter whose in love with the spawn of Satan” he says making everyone laugh before turning around again

Fan: “how often do you two hang out outside of the set?”

You : look at Alex and smile “we hang out a ton actually, when I first got cast I knew that my character was going to be head over heels for Jack so I made it my mission to become Alex’s best friend I wanted the onscreen romance to be as organic as possible and I wanted him to be comfortable around me and vice verse. Also it helps that we have so much in common so it was easy to become close friends so yes moral of the story we do hang out a lot” you say.

Alex: “ yeah we do hang out a lot but I think that’s what makes Jack and y/c/n so unique as a couple or potential couple because they are so different but because you and I are so alike it doesn’t pull the audience away from the story or the romance aspect, it makes it much more believable” he adds.

Same fan: “would you guys ever date each other?”

The audience oh’s and awe’s

Alex looks at you and says: “I thought we already where” With a cheeky smile. Making the crowd cheer

You: giggle “no I’m dating, Osric” you say clearly joking and pointing out the fact that some fans ship you with Osric as well. He shakes his head “next question” you add clearly trying to avoid the question.

Fan: “hi I think you two are really great my question is for y/n I know you really like music but what type of music do you hear before going to set? Like what music gets you in the filming mood?”

You: “hmm I listen to many different genres of music so it all depends on how I am feeling at that exact moment but this past week I have been blasting some AC/DC” the crowd cheers. “Yeah I just feel like it brings back the general feeling of the first season. And it helps me get into y/c/n’s mind set.” Next question

This went on for a while and after the panel you and Alex walked down. He followed you. “Dude what’s on your schedule for today?” He asks you . “Lots of stuff I gotta go to my panel right about now “ You say pointing to a golf cart that had a staff member and your cousin inside. “Ah alright what about lunch?” He asks you. “Um not sure haven’t thought it through yet what are you doing for lunch?” You ask him. “Not much you wanna see what everyone else is doing maybe we can plan something “ he says. “Yeah yeah txt me let me know what the plan is I gotta get going” You say before giving him a hug and running towards the golf cart.

“Alright let’s roll” you say once you get inside the cart. You drive through the convention center and see fans screaming and waving at you. “Hi!! Hello!! “ you scream back as you wave. People take their phones out and record you and you do the same putting the fans on your Snapchat story was your favorite thing to do. You get to your panel room and stand behind the curtain as the staff was allowing the fans inside you take your phone again and record a couple fans. You hear a staff member address the crowd. “Hello everyone we are so excited for you all to get your questions answered today by the lovely y/n” at that you walk out into the stage and the fans cheer once they quite down you take the mic from the staff member. “Hello everyone thank you for being here this is an amazing turnout. Wow I was actually worried that I wouldn’t have an audience here “ You say making the crowd laugh. “Alright do we have any 1st timers?” You say raising your hand and looking through the audience at a couple of hands “Alright so a couple of you that’s good so I’m not alone here, so for those of you who where dragged in here by your friends or your children I’m y/n and I’m y/c/n from supernatural I will be answering any questions that you may have about the show about myself about anything actually so we have a mic up here in the middle let’s get this started shall we?” You say

Fan: “hi this is so cool okay so most of us know that you where a part of the spn fandom before you where on the show, has there been a specific moment when you fan girled.”

You smile at the fan. “I love this question, yes I am a huge part of the fandom and the moment I saw Jensen it made my heart go crazy. So I met Jensen before I met anyone else on the show, hes a total teddy bear by the way, so anyways It was my first day on set and I was so nervous because this is something I have wanted for a really long time and I was walking into a soundstage and I see Jensen sitting in his chair alone and looking through his script and I almost ran out of the sound stage I ligit turned around and was ready to walk but somehow I was able to talk myself out of my anxiety and turned back around I was sooo nervous because you know this is the Jensen Ackles and he looks up with this super gentle smile and waves me over. He was so sweet” you say “but you know it’s like that on set still anything new about my character or anyone else’s character makes me fan girl I love this show I’ve invested so many hours and years into these characters that I feel like they are a part of me so I fan girl a lot on set” you add thanking the fan and going to the next person

Fan: “so you are going to be in the new season of stranger Things have you met anyone in the cast yet?”

You nod “ yeah I have I met Finn Wolfhard who plays Mike at a show in Vancouver not to long ago I went with my cousin and he was there with his band, he was so nice and his band can get down, I have also met Joe Kerry before auditioning for the role I met him at an award show but he might not remember me It was a while ago” you say

Fan: “are u aware that some fans have created fan art with you and Alex as (y/c/n) and jack being intament? If so what do u think about the shippers out there?”

You smile at her. “Well I had some idea about fan art but I do not think I’ve seen any with my face on there and thank goodness I haven’t been exposed to that yet I think it be a bit strange although I’m not against it or the shippers, I think that people are allowed to ship whoever they want and should not redicule others for shipping anything else. So that’s what I think. And I ship (y/c/n) and jack too and I love fan art you are all so talented that if u make fan art I’d love to see it”

The crowd goes wild after a couple of more questions from fans and lots of laughs you finish the panel. “Thank you soo much for being a part of this journey with me and for the generous amounts of support that you all bring to the fandom it’s really amazing how united you all are so thank you again I hope to see you all at my signing “ you wave good bye to the crowd and walk off stage.

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loveistheonlytruth · 6 years

Note

ANSWER ALL THOSE CUTE ASKS PLS

sunflower: if there was a door that went to a city that was a good representation of you, what city would it be and would you go through the door?

ANS; I feel like Japan because everyone in Japan is fucking rad and everyone there fucks with harry STYLES RIGHT? imma open my own vegetarian restaurant there and cook 4 cheap u kno

pink: sunsets or sunrises?

ANS; SUNRISE IN THE SUMMER AND SUNSET IN THE WINTER.

freshly cut grass: are you an early riser? if not, is this because you stay up late?

ANS; I’m an early riser because there is an actual fucking ROOSTER in my brain and my uterus will wet the bed if I’m not up before 6:30 am

journal: would you dye your hair if you had the opportunity? why or why not?

ANS; IM TOO CHICKEN BUT I’D DO HENNA TO GIVE MY HAIR A NICE NATURAL RED HUE I MEAN MY MUM MAKES HENNA FROM FLOWERS SO I’D WANNA TRY IT OUT

painting: in what ways are you creative?

ANS; like at making excuses? and like playlists? I’m also creative with my comebacks.

waves: is there one music genre you can’t listen to?

ANS; Jacob saruthatkidneedstostopheisafuckboyhecantsingforshit

writing: do you write letters? if not, would you like to be?

ANS; no one irl would casually accept letters but if its a special occasion I try my best to write them a sweet letter

waterfalls: describe your perfect date.

ANS; A HARRY STYLES CONCERT WHERE I CAN SOB IN UR ARMS AND RANT ABOUT HOW MUCH I’LL NEVER LOVE U THE WAY I LOVE MMITH

freckles: what’s something that makes you happy? describe the first thing that comes to your head.

ANS; music just makes me so happy I just want to cry because I know i’ll never be able to listen to all the music in the world and that makes me so so so so sosadbecause music just makes me so happy like gosh my heart swells up and everything bad is soothed.

dimples: would you rather be inviting on a hike or a night out?

ANS; IM ONLY DOWN FOR HIKING IF ULL TEACH ME TO CLIMB TREES. OH I LOVE TREEEEES. but bugs scare me.

blushing: describe a rad person you know.

ANS; a rad person I know is a girl in my class, we connect on a whole new level and like she shares the same vision as me and wow, she gets it u kno. shes also super sweet and smart (I also kno another rad person on here, gato…..*sigh* I love u

watercolour: talk about something someone you are interested in can do that never fails to make you find them attractive?

ANS; toast…does this thing where it like….

melts

the butter….I orgasm everytime…

pine: if you could only smell one scent for the rest of your life, what would it be?

ANS; the smell of my mother, she smells like wisdom…and flowers I lobe my mum and I don’t ever wanna forget how she smells.

pink eyeshadow: pasta or pizza?

ANS; PIZZA

icy: homemade or takeout?

ANS; HOMEMADE

rosè: what’s your opinion on shyness?

ANS; it basically means the person is a wild bitch when u get to know theM

clouds: list your top 5 songs at the moment and how they make you feel

ANS; juju sunshine; makes me feel like im falling in acid that’s freezing my soul but burning my skin. joji will he; like squeezing my heart in my hands and watching it BLEED.max shrager thoughts of you; like im getting all prim and proper for a one night stand in the 20′s.unknown mortal orchestra from the sun; like im living inside the shrivled heart of an old grandpa. DEATH THORES ESSEX; like i’m getting butchered with an axe by a really fuckin hot dude.

silk: list songs you listen to for a jam

ANS; OMG BY CAMILLA CABELLEO, DRAEM GIRL NO VACATION, SUKI AND ME ALEX CALDER, STRANGE DREAMS ALEX CALDER, MILK IT NIRVANA.

white sheets: where’s somewhere you would love to travel to? why?

ANS; AMSTREDAM BC THEY HAVE A LIVE SEX SHOW THERE AND I WANNA GO WHAT THFREFU

black nail polish: what do you do to pamper yourself?

ANS; masturbate to cutedeadguys.com (SORRY IM SORRY BLOCK ME)jk I listen to meet me in the hallway and plan out a music vid 4 dat bitch

hidden beaches: do you prefer to hang out in a big group or one on one?

ANS; small bc like im awkward with a lotta peeps but at the same time I like listening to peeps opinions

crossed fingers: using no negative words, describe your hair.

ANS; wavy sometimes squar-ie sometimes tame it has amind of its own relly

mocktails: cold weather or hot weather?

ANS; COLD WEATHER MONSOON RAIN SNOW ALL THAT GOOD STUFF

THABKS FOR ASKING ME I HAVE A PROBLEM IN MY NECK AND THIS DISTRECTED ME FROM THE PAIN

#ASKS #ANSWERED #YAY!#IM IN PAIN PRAY 4 ME

13 notes · View notes

lentils-writes · 7 years

Text

Day 12: Arranged marriage AU with this prompt that I found:

okay but like two friends getting married for cheaper tution like hah we are geniuses this is a fool proof plan and we are completely platonic everything is fine haha i didnt just notice how beautiful your eyes are and how soft your hair feels LOVING THIS CHEAPER TUITION EVERYTHING IS FINE

(I am SO SORRY this is late I got very carried away I like pining ok)

Kara checks her phone on the bus home and, of course, there’s a text from Melinda. That’s not weird; they text each other every day. What is weird is that it’s just a link to an article and the headline is “Get Married, Save Thousands on Tuition.”

Kara opens the article, skims it, and then replies.

??? what do u mean by this article???

I think it’s pretty self-explanatory.

it’s rly not

explain pls

Well, we both got into U of C, right?

yeah...

But I’m a California resident and you’re not. You’ll gonna be paying an extra twenty grand since you’re out-of-state. If we get legally married, you’ll count as a resident.

Kara feels her face getting hot and glances around to make sure no one is looking at her.

what r u saying

It wouldn’t be a real marriage, calm down. Just so we get tax breaks and lower tuition. I think we could even qualify for the family housing if we’re lucky. It’s way cheaper than the dorms.

wow ur moving kinda fast there

we haven’t even gone on a real date :P

Hey, I took you to see Jupiter Ascending when you were here during winter break last year!

i don’t think that counts

we got kicked out

YOU got us kicked out for laughing too loud!

Anyway, sorry if this is weird. We don’t have to if you don’t want to. I just thought it might be funny.

it is pretty funny

i gotta think about it tho

No worries. Practice starting, bye

Kara stares at her phone for a long moment, thinking. It’s not that she cares that much about marriage or thinks of it as this super important sacred symbol of love or anything. It’s something she’s thought a little more about since New Mexico legalized it when she was a freshman, and then again since the Supreme Court decision last year, but she’s in high school. The idea of falling in love and getting married is so far from her reality that she almost can’t imagine it.

Plus, it’s Melinda. Melinda is the most important person in her life - ever since they met three years ago on Tumblr, Kara’s spent hours talking to Melinda, becoming closer to her than she’s ever been to anyone else. She has friends at school (Alex, Sara, Zoe), but she’s always felt weirdly alienated from the rest of her classmates. Melinda likes to listen to her talk about Greek mythology and weapons history and all the other weird shit that most people find confusing or just too weird. Melinda makes her feel normal. So maybe marrying her best friend for a few years, and then divorcing a few years later, wouldn’t be the worst thing. Especially if the benefits are really that good.

---

Kara’s mom is weirdly supportive. “I know you and Melinda are close,” she says. “And you’re eighteen, I can’t stop you. I just don’t want you to get hurt. Be careful not to take it too seriously, okay?”

Kara hugs her mom and rolls her eyes. “I won’t, Mom,” she says. “We probably won’t even sleep in the same bed or anything.”

When she Skypes Melinda to accept her “proposal,” Melinda smirks. “I told my parents. Dad thinks it’s weird, but he likes the idea of not having to file my taxes for me. Mom lectured me for half an hour in Mandarin about and then said, ‘At least you’ll have someone to look after you, keep you out of trouble.’”

Kara giggles. “Tell her I’ll try?”

“Please. I’m the one that keeps you out of trouble,” teases Melinda. “So, I guess now we’d better figure out how courthouse weddings work. Can you come a couple days early so we can do the ceremony?”

“Yeah, I think so.” Kara nods. “We haven’t booked plane tickets or anything yet. I haven’t even really started packing.”

“Oh, and we should probably get rings. Doesn’t have to be fancy ones, just to keep up the facade. You might even be able to find something at Claire’s.”

“Yeah, I can do that. Can I stay at your place the extra couple days?”

“I’ll have to ask my parents, but probably that’s fine. They like you. As much as they like anyone, I mean.” Melinda chuckles. “I think you being a girl is helping. Mom’s never been that weird about my girlfriends, but I’m pretty sure she thinks it doesn’t really count unless I’m with a guy.”

Kara snorts and rolls her eyes. “Well, either way, it’s only four years. Then you can go off and marry a nice doctor or whatever they want you to do.”

“No, not a doctor. A lawyer. Not that I’m planning on marrying either one. Maybe not at all. You might be it.”

Kara mock-flinches. “So much pressure! I could sour you on the concept of marriage forever.”

“You could,” teases Melinda. “Okay, I have an essay to write for AP history. Later.”

“Bye,” says Kara, signing off. She has homework too, but instead of working on it she finds herself opening a new tab and going to Target’s jewelry section. Just for laughs, of course.

(The one she ends up picking out, and taking the bus to get the next day, is silver and has two curving lines that cross over each other, with a line of clear gems set into one of the lines. It sort of reminds Kara of an infinity symbol - ironic, but it’s fifteen dollars and won’t look too cheap.)

---

Neither Kara nor Melinda opt to wear white dresses to the courthouse. Melinda because Kara’s pretty sure she doesn’t own a single dress, and Kara because she doesn’t own anything white. She wears her favorite red summer dress and a sapphire necklace her mom insisted she take. Melinda wears a button-up shirt and her nice leather jacket. Kara’s starting to feel like maybe the necklace is too much, but Melinda smiles at her and says, “It brings out your eyes.” Kara says thank you and then laughs, and she’s not sure why.

They mostly spend the time waiting to be called in for the ceremony teasing each other about who’s going to do what. “I don’t bake,” Kara says, “so forget about coming home to fresh-baked cookies.”

“You should make us that pasta salad your mom gave you the recipe for, though,” Melinda says. “That sounds amazing.”

“If you rub my shoulders after dinner?”

“Deal.”

The officiant seems to take their giggly familiarity for actual romantic affection, and the ceremony takes only a few minutes. Kara expects it to feel more important than it does, but before she knows it Melinda is slipping the ring on her finger and pulling her in for a quick kiss at the end of the vows. It’s over before Kara can really absorb it’s happening.

They hold hands out of the courthouse, and Melinda grins over at her. “So,” she says. “How’s it feel?”

Kara shrugs, grinning back. “Totally normal.”

“Good,” Melinda says. “I guess maybe we should’ve practiced kissing first, but he didn’t seem suspicious.”

Kara shrugs. “I dunno. I think it was fine.” She hasn’t been kissed in a long time, not since early junior year when she and Beth broke up. She just hasn’t really had time to worry about finding anybody else.

They go get ice cream and shoot each other secret smiles. Kara eats a chunk of her coffee ice cream and stares at the little silver ring on her finger. It’ll take some getting used to.

---

They get a tiny one-bedroom apartment in the family housing complex, which is way nicer than the dorms even if it doesn’t come with furniture. Melinda’s parents help them buy a cheap bed frame and mattress. “Having only one bed saves money,” Lian May says, when May tries to protest. “And there won’t be enough room for two in this tiny place.”

Melinda makes a face at Kara behind her mother’s back, but Kara just shrugs. It’s not like she hasn’t slept in the same bed as other girls before. It’s no big deal.

There’s a ton of orientation activities for them to go to, but they end up skipping out halfway through and going home to order a pizza and watch Netflix. “I guess we could’ve said we were gonna go Netflix and chill,” teases Kara.

Melinda rolls her eyes and bumps her shoulder. “Dork.”

Kara gets a job in the admissions office, and Melinda ends up working at the on-campus gym. Classes start, and they fall into a routine. They switch off cooking every other night, except if someone has a group meeting or evening lecture and then there are usually leftovers in the fridge. They get invited to a few parties and wave at their neighbors and get pretty good at the whole acting-married thing. Kara finds that the story of how they met doesn’t actually need that much editing; people seem to find it adorable. She meets Bobbi in her intro to human biology class, who tells her about the on-campus LGBT+ society (which, apparently, had had a booth at the clubs fair that they skipped) and gives her her number to hang out later. (Kara tries not to laugh out loud; go figure the only time another queer girl’s ever given her her number, it’s in a totally platonic context.)

And then, a month and a half into the school year, Kara has to consider that she might be falling in love with her “wife.”

Or at least she definitely wants to bone her. She figures that out one night when Melinda’s taking a bath and Kara barges into the bathroom to pee (nothing new, they’ve been doing that since the first week here) and notices, holy shit, Melinda has incredible boobs.

Melinda is reading and, when she notices Kara staring, she looks at her, puzzled. “What?”

“Uh,” says Kara, quickly looking away. “Nothing. Just wondering what you were reading.”

“Just a book for European History. You alright? You seem nervous.”

“I’m fine!” Kara says, too abrupt.

(She ends up having some confusing sexy dreams that night, and luckily Melinda has an early class the next morning and she doesn’t. Once Melinda leaves, she gets herself off quickly and hopes maybe that will be the end of it. Maybe it was just her body needing an orgasm.)

(It wasn’t.)

After that, she starts noticing other things: how shiny Melinda’s hair is in the sunlight, how satisfying it is to make her laugh or smile, how strong her hands are. About a week and a half after the bath incident, Melinda offers to give her a shoulder rub and Kara’s heart starts beating so fast she’s sure Melinda can hear it. But she just nods, and it turns out Melinda’s hands are amazingly strong. Kara probably makes some embarrassing noises, but Melinda doesn’t say anything about it, just smirks and says, “Glad you’re enjoying it.”

“I’m just really tense,” mutters Kara, blushing.

“Hey, I get it. My algebra prof is being a pain in the ass and assigning a ton of homework.” Melinda smiles sympathetically at her. “Anytime you need another one lemme know, okay?”

“Th-thanks,” says Kara. “I can try to do it for you too?”

Melinda shrugs. “Sure.” She shucks off her shirt and turns her back to Kara. “You ever done this before?”

“A couple times,” says Kara, “but I don’t think my hands are as strong as yours.” She starts kneading May’s shoulder muscles anyway.

“Mm, this is fine,” hums Melinda. “Thank you.”

Kara tries really hard to do a good job, and also not to notice how soft Melinda’s skin is.

---

Finally she can’t take it anymore and texts Bobbi to meet up with her for lunch. Bobbi’s probably her closest friend on campus (besides Melinda), she can trust her with her secret.

“Hey,” Bobbi says when she arrives at Teriyaki Madness, setting down her styrofoam container full of food and sitting across from Kara. “What’s up?”

Kara purses her lips and then finally says, “It’s kind of a long story, but it has to do with me and Melinda.”

“You’re not really a couple, are you?” Bobbi asks.

Kara’s so startled all she can do is squeak, “Um.”

“Dude, I figured out you guys were faking it like the third time we all hung out together. You guys are obviously super close, but when you hold hands or hug or kiss you’re so awkward. Like, I’ve had friends that were in LDRs and when they were together you couldn’t pry them apart. Not you guys.” Bobbi raises an eyebrow. “I mean, I’m guessing you got married for tuition, right? Mad props. My last ex wanted to do that but I knew we’d end up divorced in six months.”

Kara puts her face in her hands and groans. “Is it that obvious?”

“I mean, I dunno. I’m pretty perceptive. I think probably most people aren’t thinking that much about it. But anyway, what did you wanna talk to me about? You guys okay other than, y’know, not actually being a couple?”

“Um,” says Kara. “Well.” She stares at her soda, unsure of how to say I wanna have sex with my best friend-slash-wife and also I might be falling in love with her?

Bobbi looks at her for a second. “You’re not like, in trouble, are you?”

“No, no! I mean. I’m okay, I just…” Kara swallows and then mutters “ImightbeintoherIthinkmaybe.”

At that, Bobbi laughs, then slaps a hand over her mouth. “Jeez, sorry, that was mean,” she says, but she’s still grinning. “So you, what, figured out you like her now?”

“I guess,” says Kara, eating a piece of chicken. “She’s...we’ve been best friends for three years, she’s the person I know best in the world. Maybe I should’ve seen this coming.”

Bobbi shrugs and replies, “Hey, just ‘cause you’re close with someone doesn’t mean you’re gonna wanna bone them. Izzy and I practically grew up together and I can’t imagine being into her, she’s like my sister. If I had a really hot sister, I guess. But I’m not interested in her that way. Anyway. What are you gonna do about it?”

“I don’t know!” says Kara. “What am I supposed to do? ‘Hey, best friend who I’m legally married to, I’m thinking maybe I actually wanna date you and not just pretend, how do you feel about that?’ That’s so weird.” She sighs. “This is stupid.”

Shaking her head, Bobbi says, “It’s not. You really just need to talk to her about it. I know it’s gonna be weird, but if she’s not into you too, then you guys can talk about you like, dating other people. Or you can come over and I’ll buy you a shitton of ice cream and we’ll watch dumb movies. Whatever you need.”

“Or I could just never say anything,” Kara says. But she makes a face and nods. “Thanks for listening.”

“Hey, no worries.” Bobbi pauses and then adds, “Listen, if she’s not down for whatever, I’m also available for a friends-with-benefits thing, if you want.” She gives Kara an exaggerated wink.

Kara snorts. “I’ll think about it.”

---

It takes Kara a week to figure out what she wants to say, and then another week to figure out the right time to say it, which means that once she’s finally gotten up the guts it’s midterms week and she and Melinda are so busy they barely see each other. Then after midterms she waits a week or two just to be sure, and then it’s the week before Thanksgiving and it would just be weird to make things weird before Thanksgiving, so she waits some more. (She ends up going home with Melinda and meeting many members of her extended family. To them, she’s just Melinda’s roommate, which is okay. It’s kind of nice to not have to pretend.)

And then it’s the holiday season.

Bobbi’s taken it upon herself to badger Kara about talking to Melinda give-or-take once a week, and by this point she’s just texting stuff like DONE YET? in all-caps. You have to tell her sometime!!!! Bobbi writes. You can’t just NOT!!!!!

u wanna bet

You’re going to die of blue balls or something!

i don’t think that’s possible, bob

and i don’t even have balls

Ok maybe not but seriously, this is ridiculous

Finally, one night they’re watching a movie and Kara blurts out, “I have to talk to you about something.”

Melinda pauses the movie and glances over at her. “What’s up? You okay?”

“Yes. No. I mean-” Kara sighs. “It’s embarrassing.”

Melinda looks even more confused. “What do you mean?”

Kara bites her lip. “I...I like you.”

“Oh.” Melinda just looks at her for a moment.

Kara’s starting to get progressively more anxious and angry with herself when Melinda adds, “Well, good, ‘cause I was trying to figure out how to tell you that I’m into you. It seemed like a bad romance novel cliche.”

Kara laughs, maybe a little hysterically. “Wait, how long have you been…?”

Melinda coughs. “This whole plan may or may not have been my way of trying to tell you.”

“Mel, oh my god! It’s been months! Why didn’t you-”

“Same reason you didn’t,” Melinda says, nudging her with her shoulder. “Too chickenshit to say something.”

“Shit,” says Kara, putting her face in her hands. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know - I’ve been stressing since like before Halloween about this! I told Bobbi and she’s been bugging me to tell you!”

“Oh, Bobbi knows?” Melinda snorts. “Great. So we’ll never hear the end of that.”

“Well, I usually tell you about this stuff, but I couldn’t! Oh my god.” Kara laughs again. “So I guess...now we get to figure out how to date for real?”

“I guess,” Melinda says. “You wanna make out for real?”

“Oh my god, yes.”

(Bobbi never does let them live it down. And they don’t get divorced after the four years are up.)

#karamel #Kara Lynn Palamas #melinda may #Bobbi Morse #fandom: agents of shield

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captain-jagk · 7 years

Note

Answer all of them 😎

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? my gf

2. Are you outgoing or shy? shy lol

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? my gf ON HER BIRTHDAY TOMORROW!

4. Are you easy to get along with? lol idk i guess

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? i hope so

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? people that are the exact opposite of me but not really idk

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? yes

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? jack barakat

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? no

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? my therapist

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? ur doing great though

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? dirty laundry, last young renegade, technicolor, take it all back, nookie

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? yes

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? eh

15. What good thing happened this summer? it hasn’t happened yet

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? yes

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? this is a big question for me i don’t have time

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? no

19. Do you like bubble baths? YES

20. Do you like your neighbors? she’s old

21. What are you bad habits? being negative

22. Where would you like to travel? everywhere if i wasn’t afraid of flying

23. Do you have trust issues? kinda

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? doing my makeup

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? my legs

26. What do you do when you wake up? cry

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? uh i don’t really care tbh

28. Who are you most comfortable around? my gf

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? no

30. Do you ever want to get married? yes

31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? yes

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? lol (jack barakat and alex gaskarth bye)

33. Spell your name with your chin. no

34. Do you play sports? What sports? no

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? tv

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? yeah

37. What do you say during awkward silences? nothing

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? sierra

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? target bc im basic

40. What do you want to do after high school? find out who tf my room mate is

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? depends

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? im being myself

43. Do you smile at strangers? sometimes

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? seeing sierra

46. What are you paranoid about? everything

47. Have you ever been high? yes

48. Have you ever been drunk? yes

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? no

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? black

51. Ever wished you were someone else? eh

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my weight

53. Favourite makeup brand? i don’t have a particular brand

54. Favourite store? don’t rlly have one

55. Favourite blog? see above

56. Favourite colour? red

57. Favourite food? pizza

58. Last thing you ate? macaroni

59. First thing you ate this morning? bagel

60. Ever won a competition? For what? a writing competition lol

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? no

62. Been arrested? For what? no

63. Ever been in love? ya

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? 1st grade and it was in my closet

65. Are you hungry right now? no

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? no

67. Facebook or Twitter? fb

68. Twitter or Tumblr? tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now? its background noise

70. Names of your bestfriends? sierra bc shes my gf and makala and ryan

71. Craving something? What? not rlly

72. What colour are your towels? white and gray mostly

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? too many (7)

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? a GIANT PLUSH BEAR THAT COST $100

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? A lot

75. Favourite animal? bear

76. What colour is your underwear? gray

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? mint

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? white

80. What colour pants? black

81. Favourite tv show? walking dead

82. Favourite movie? pirates of the caribbean

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? mean girls

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? mean girls

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? : )

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? nemo

87. First person you talked to today? sierra

88. Last person you talked to today? probably sierra as well

89. Name a person you hate? taylor

90. Name a person you love? sierra

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? yes

92. In a fight with someone? no

93. How many sweatpants do you have? like 2

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? like 2

95. Last movie you watched? hidden figures

96. Favourite actress? i don’t really have one??

97. Favourite actor? ????

98. Do you tan a lot? no lol

99. Have any pets? 2 dogs and 2 fish

100. How are you feeling? tired

101. Do you type fast? kinda

102. Do you regret anything from your past? almost everything tbh

103. Can you spell well? no

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? no

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? no

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? maybe??

107. Have you ever been on a horse? no

108. What should you be doing? not this

109. Is something irritating you right now? kinda

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?sierra

111. Do you have trust issues? didn’t i answer this already?

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? myself

113. What was your childhood nickname? rose(y)

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yes

115. Do you play the Wii? sometimes

116. Are you listening to music right now? no

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? no

118. Do you like Chinese food? yes

119. Favourite book? lol

120. Are you afraid of the dark? yes

121. Are you mean? yes

122. Is cheating ever okay? no

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? no

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? eh

125. Do you believe in true love?yes

126. Are you currently bored? yes

127. What makes you happy? all time low and sierra

128. Would you change your name? no

129. What your zodiac sign? virgo

130. Do you like subway? yes

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? i have a gf bye

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? i also answered this

133. Favourite lyrics right now? “you were my last young renegade heartache”

134. Can you count to one million? why

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? probably saying i was drunk/high when i wasn’t

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? closed

137. How tall are you? 5′5″

138. Curly or Straight hair? curly

139. Brunette or Blonde? brunette

140. Summer or Winter? summer

141. Night or Day? niight

142. Favourite month? october

143. Are you a vegetarian? yes

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? none

145. Tea or Coffee? neither

146. Was today a good day? it was a day

147. Mars or Snickers? neither

148. What’s your favourite quote? “no” -abraham lincoln

149. Do you believe in ghosts? yes

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? i don’t have a book anywhere near me i am illiterate

4 notes · View notes

lobsterdex · 7 years

Note

Kent trying to come out subtlety but heteronormativity gets in the way. He is continually frustrated and keeps getting less subtle each time.(Maybe Jack joins in and they compete to see who the media notices first?)

this got kind of out of hand which is why it took me 200 years to publish it?? it is also arguably the worst thing i’ve ever written and i love it. not exactly what u requested by enjoy :)

Kent is lying on his side on the couch with his head inJeff’s lap.

Jeff is watching Sports Center, and Kent is mostly justspacing out. It’s warm and comfortable, and he feels safe, and the backgroundnoise of the TV and Jeff’s hand carding through his hair is lulling him tosleep.

“Should we?” Jeff says.

“Should we what,” Kent mumbles.

“Come out.”

Kent’s eyes snap open, and the analysists are talking toeach other with Jack’s picture in the corner of the screen. Ah.

Jeff’s hand stills. “We don’t have to, I don’t know. I don’tknow why I said that. I just. Maybe it would be better if it wasn’t just him,y’know?”

Kent lets his eyes fall close. “Yeah.” The same idea hasbeen rolling around his head for the past few weeks, since Jack and Bitty cameout quietly via Jack’s Instagram. The entire Falcs organization and fan base isbehind him, as they fucking should be, considering he’s the reason they’ve madethe playoffs the last three years. And yeah, one player is not the team, Kentknows the spiel. He is the spiel. Butso is Jack. A single player isn’t an entire team, but one of Jack’s calibermakes a world of difference. It changes the dynamic and can turn the wholething around if the rest of the team clicks.

So they can’t really tear down his game. They can’t play the“he’s doing badly because he’s gay” angle, because Jack has a seven game pointstreak. No one is really saying anything outright, but they’re stilluncomfortable.

It would be the same way if he came out. They can’t say hissexuality ruined his game, because he’s been gay since the draft. He was gaywhen he was born, he was gay in juniors, he was gay when he won the Calder, hewas gay when he won the cup the first time, he was still gay when he lifted itthe second time. If anything, he could argue it made him better.

He’s safe in the knowledge that he won’t get traded or sentdown to the minors. He doubts he’ll lose much of his fan base, and most of theteam knows already anyways.

It’s always been something he thought would never be anoption, so he never let himself think about it too much. But now, he realizesthere really isn’t much to lose.

“Do you want to?” he says.

“If we did, I’d be okay with it,” Jeff says quietly.

Kent rolls onto his back and smiles softly up at him. “Iguess we should, then.”

Kent doesn’t want it to be a big deal.

It is a big deal, but he doesn’t want to hold a pressconference or make a speech.

He and Jeff sit in one of the conference rooms with the PRpeople and the GMs and the coaches. They’re in there for an hour and a half,and everyone just decides it would be best to do it via Instagram, which theydefinitely didn’t that long of a meeting to decide, but whatever. Kent isn’tthe boss here.

Kent chooses a picture of the two of them and gets PR’sapproval. He captions it with the red heart emoji, and then it’s done. There’sno going back now.

Apparently, it wasn’t a big enough deal.

They’re all sitting in the damn conference room again, and someonefrom PR is summarizing it for them. It’s not a lot to summarize. Deadspin ranan article about their bromance, and some tumblr blogs started speculating andpulled out receipts, but nothing legitimate enough to publicly confirm it.

“I don’t think any of us want to sit here for another hour,so how about Jeff posts a picture and we cross our fingers and call it a day?”Alex from PR says, clapping her hands together at the head of the table.

“Sure,” Jeff says. Kent nods in agreement, and they break.

It’s still not a big enough deal.

It’s progress, though, if you count a Deadspin articlespeculating about whether or not there’s a romantic nature to their bromanceprogress. Jeff reads it aloud to Kent in bed.

“So I guess we should go fuck in the Bellagio,” Jeff says,and Kent snorts.

“Nah, then the headline would just be, ‘Two bros arrestedfor wrestling naked in the Fountains of Bellagio.’”

Jeff laughs so hard Kit falls off the end of the bed andbolts out the door.

Kent doesn’t know why they’re all still bothering with theconference room; it’s just him, Jeff, Alex and some other guy from PR, and Tag,who is mostly here for “moral support,” because he thinks this is all hilariousand has nothing better to do.

Alex asks them about a press conference for the hell of it,and doesn’t seem surprised when they immediately veto it.

She flips through a few pages in her notebook, then sighsand looks up at them. “You just want to keep trying Instagram and hope someonecatches on?”

Kent looks at Jeff, who just shrugs. “Yeah. Should I captionit with two hearts?”

Alex rolls her eyes. “Whatever you want, just run it by mefirst.”

“We could do a date night or something,” Jeff suggests.

“That would work,” Alex says.

It doesn’t work.

They go out to dinner, and it’s been decided that Kentshould do most of the posting because he has more followers and a biggeroverall fan base. “More eyes are on him” were Alex’s exact words, but they allknew what she meant.

So Kent posts a picture of Jeff sitting across from him, fancyrestaurant with white and gold trim and potted plants everywhere, candles andglasses of wine on the table, more silverware than Kent knows what to do with,the whole nine yards.

He captions it “Date Night” with the red heart emoji, andthen he puts his phone in airplane mode and has dinner with his boyfriend.

It’s still not enough, and Kent is starting to seriouslyconsider Jeff’s plan to fuck in the Bellagio.

Alex would kill him. He would have to get his affairs inorder and write his will and whatnot if they have to resort to that. He alsodoesn’t really want to do that to his mother, but least they have a plan Z.

They all meet up in the conference room and Alex sighs andstarts a group chat with the three of them and tells them to keep trying and torun anything they come up with by her. Kent makes them all put their hands inthe middle and do a countdown and break.

“Say ‘gay’ on three!” he says, and it gets a smile out ofAlex. They break, and then Tag walks them out to their cars rambling about howridiculous the whole thing is. The media loves the gay scandals, and yet hereare Kent and Jeff giving them the second big gay story of the year, and theyjust keep saying bromance.

“If I hear the word bromance one more time, I’m skating intoour next game naked with a pride flag,” Jeff says.

“If I see the word bromance in one more headline, we’refucking in the Bellagio,” Kent says, and Tag groans and says, “gross,” but he’sa little shit who once hung up mistletoe all over Kent’s apartment, so Kentfeels zero remorse.

Jeff posts a picture of Kent sitting on the couch with Kitin his pajamas, grinning lazily at the camera.

It’s captioned “the Boyf.”

The next day, there’s another Deadspin article about theirbromance, and Kent texts Alex asking if she’s sure about the Bellagio plan.

Her response is an immediate “absolutely not,” followed by“this is fucking ridiculous” and “keep trying.”

He’s in a groupchat with Jeff, Jack, Bitty, and thePoindexter kid called “gays of the nhl.”

Bitty keeps sending screenshots of Kent and Jeff’s Instagramposts with obscene emoji combinations. He also leaves Kent a two minutevoicemail of him laughing his way to wheezing because they’re being so goddamnobvious but the whole world has decided to stay in denial.

Poindexter: Lolghost asked if you guys were dating

You:really??

You:finally

You:what did u say

Poindexter: Isaid yeah and then he said “why the fuck is no one talking about this”

Bitty: HONESTLY

Jeff: Would youguys still love us if we came out by fucking in the Bellagio

Poindexter: Thewhat

You:the fountains

Poindexter: Ohthat

Poindexter: Yeahdo it

Bitty: I mean youcan afford the public indecency charges……………so I don’t see any reason not to

Jack: Bitty has apoint

Jack: We’d stilllove you

You:perfect let’s do it

Bitty: haha “doit”

You:fuck u bits

Bitty: ;))

You:ur not funny

Poindexter: Sexpuns are always funny

Jeff: ^^

You:et tu???????????

In their next game, Kent breaks the tie with a minute left,and Jeff and Tag crash into him, yelling. He and Jeff are nose to nose,grinning, and Kent decides fuck it, what does it matter anyways, at this point,and kisses him on the mouth.

It isn’t a long or intense kiss, because Tag is screaming intheir ears and Brennan crashes into them a few seconds later. The only personwho brings it up is one of the regular beat reporters who asks him about thegoal and says, “dramatic celly” with a wink. And also Tag, who laughs at themfor about five straight minutes once all the reporters leave.

The next morning, Alex texts them a link to yet anotherarticle about their bromance. The embedded picture isn’t even of them kissing,it’s just of them nose to nose, hugging and grinning.

Alex: I give up

Alex: Which meansyou still CANNOT try the Bellagio plan, but I don’t have any other ideas thatwouldn’t require a presser or a big publicity thing.

Jeff: So what now

You:I have an idea

You:But like I’m not sureif it’s possible or legal

Jeff: ????? U nevertold me???

You:You’re literallysitting right next to me

Alex: That isn’treassuring, but what is it?

It’s the first time in years that Alex approves one of hisideas. Granted, they’ve gotten more ridiculous with time as he needs less real helpwith PR, but still.

She says she’ll make some calls, pull some strings.

Jeff is shaking his head. “I hate you.”

Kent is grinning. “It’ll be fun.”

Poindexter: Kentyou’re the worst person in the world

Poindexter: Youreally did this

Poindexter: I can’tfucking believe

You::)

Bitty: ???

Poindexter: https://www.buzzfeed.com/norbertobriceno/ten-times-kent-parson-came-out?utm_term=. xmRKnqDZV #.garlzmkkr

Bitty: HSHDGGDHSHFGGF

Bitty: YOUG FUCKIN G DIDN’T WHO ARE YOU

Jack: They let you write it yourself?

You:yeah isn’tit great

Jeff: Lol yeah sure whatever helps u sleep at night babe

Jack: I honestly wish I was more surprised by this

Jack: I would’ve never come up with it on my own but now that it’shappened it’s more like “oh yeah fucking of course” instead of “wow I can’tbelieve this”

You:awthanks jackie boy

You:youare my oldest friend after all

Jeff: It’s a really stupid article but at least we got to point outall the stuff no one noticed

Jeff: That part was fun

Bitty: “I can see how the first one or two could be taken as a joke,but date night? The Boyf? Really?” this is the best thing I’ve ever seen thereare actual tears in my eyes

Poindexter: Iconic

You: thanksboys i try

#i'll probably beta this and put it on ao3 bc why not #and idk if the texting part makes sense #the 'You' is supposed to be kent bc it's his perspective even tho it's 3rd person #if that makes sense #it looks better on word/ao3/anything that isn't tumblr bc kent's texts are right aligned like it looks on your phone #anyways #my fic #kent parson #kp #answered

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demonialex · 7 years

Note

1-100 😘

omfg ok under the cut cuz yeah long af

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify!

is your room messy or clean? uhhh it’s in the middle i guess lmao a little messy but not complete chaos imo?

what color are your eyes? dark brown

do you like your name? why? i hate my given name so instead i named myself alex and now i rly like it ay B)

what is your relationship status? single

describe your personality in 3 words or less caring, impatient, lazy

what color hair do you have? brown

what kind of car do you drive? color? i dont have a car

where do you shop? uhhhhh i dont really shop much cuz im broke? but sometimes in various stores it depends on what im getting?

how would you describe your style? “i don’t have enough money to dress in the style i actualyl like so this will have to do”

favorite social media account ngl it’s probably this hellsite

what size bed do you have? queen

any siblings? nah, only child

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? hmmmm probably canada? cause they seem rly chill with lgbtq ppl and they are rather safe? plus i speak the language sooo

favorite snapchat filter? ...the dog one (well out of the current ones cuz i rly miss the “greek goddess” or whatever the hell was the name of that one)

favorite makeup brand(s) kinda rly dont care tbh? i kinda of go with whats cheaper lmao and also it varies on what it is (foundation, eye shadow, etc)

how many times a week do you shower? usually every day tho im ngl today i was so exhausted (im super sick) that i forgot to shower

favorite tv show? currently? probably the magicians

shoe size? varies between 7~8 US

how tall are you? 162cm

sandals or sneakers? sneakers

do you go to the gym? ok i tried going this year but then i got drowned in homework and now i have the flu dont judge me

describe your dream date honestly i have no idea? as long as im with someone i actually like and am attracted to, and that the conversation flows, im good.

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? my go-to wallet? 0. my savings wallet? i think around 1k or 1.5k i cant remember for sure? as i said, it’s a /savings/ wallet

what color socks are you wearing? im not wearing socks

how many pillows do you sleep with? one under my bed and one on each side of me so i can throw my leg over it when i roll

do you have a job? what do you do? nah, not allowed to work ;-;

how many friends do you have? uhhhhh... 3? 4? idk mate i lost A LOT of friends in the past few years :/ I have quite a few “acquaintances” now and ppl i wish were my friends but who dont seem to want the same, but actual friends i think probably just 4

whats the worst thing you have ever done? depends on who u ask, on ur morals, etc

whats your favorite candle scent? i like too many, i cant pick!! D:

3 favorite boy names guilherme, alex, leonardo ? i guess? idk

3 favorite girl names carolina, camila, alex. again, i guess lmao idk

favorite actor? dont rly have one

favorite actress? again dont rly have one oops im boring

who is your celebrity crush? fck i have way too many tbh

favorite movie? probably DEBS tbh

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?not rly... it’s not that i dont /want to/ it’s just that i constantly forget to read. my fave is probably little brother or my girlfriend is a geek

money or brains? for myself? money! on a potential partner? brains tho idc that much abt academically smart yadda yadda

do you have a nickname? what is it? Zu

how many times have you been to the hospital? uhhhh for actual important shit and not just casual check ups probably.... 4 or 5 times? i cant remember. i had pneumonia and i fractured bones quite a few times

top 10 favorite songs !!! i cant choose fam

do you take any medications daily?ye anti depressant and anti anxiety

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) always thought it was oily but apparently it’s mixed/combination

what is your biggest fear? ooo boy i have too many fears idk if i can choose a main biggest one

how many kids do you want? none thanks

whats your go to hair style? “i woke up and was too lazy to brush my hair plus if i dont brush it it looks extra fluffy and slightly curled”

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) small-ish apartment

who is your role model? dont have one tbh

what was the last compliment you received? deadass cant remember

what was the last text you sent? “thank you~”

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? no clue tbh i was still a child haha

what is your dream car? I rly dont wanna drive tbh but i find lamborghinis so fckin gorgeous

opinion on smoking? idc as long as u dont do it next to me cause it tends to make me cough a lot. tho depend on what ur smoking and the brand and if we are in an open space for some reason i dont smoke so ye

do you go to college? yup!!

what is your dream job? no clue

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? suburbs. the more things to do the better

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? i usually forget but my mom always takes them for me so :^)

do you have freckles? not the standard “a bunch of tiny ones around ur face”, but i have the classic brown ones here and there. does that make sense? :v (i hate that u guys have the same word for both kind of freckles smh)

do you smile for pictures? not usually? at most a close mouthed smile more like a smirk lmao

how many pictures do you have on your phone? i dont wanna do the math but over 1k

have you ever peed in the woods? who hasnt??

do you still watch cartoons? if animes are considered cartoons then sometimes, if not then not really

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? cant remember how the wendy’s ones taste like so i will go with mcdonalds

Favorite dipping sauce? depends on what im eating. usually blue cheese, if not then bbq

what do you wear to bed? depends on how hot it is lol

have you ever won a spelling bee? never even been to one

what are your hobbies? watching tv shows? idk mate

can you draw? kinda i guess

do you play an instrument? nah :(

what was the last concert you saw? i think it was demi lovato lmao

tea or coffee? i dont really drink either tbh. loved the tea my friend made me, and loved the coffee my grandma used to make me. alas both live too far away now

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? i deadass think i only went to dunkin donuts ONCE and i dont remember shit abt it so i will go with starbucks

do you want to get married? hmmm idc either way

what is your crush’s first and last initial? dont rly have a /major/ crush rn, just smol ones

are you going to change your last name when you get married? if their name is cooler maybe

what color looks best on you? black

do you miss anyone right now? i constantly miss too many ppl but i try to avoid thinking abt it

do you sleep with your door open or closed? closed!! i hate sleeping with open doors

do you believe in ghosts? i guess?

what is your biggest pet peeve? idk fam i have too many haha im blanking rn

last person you called` probably my mom or my grandma. i hate calloing ppl so i usually just call them lmao

favorite ice cream flavor? hmm probably half baked from B&J. in general i like peanut, chocolate, vanilla, bubblegum... i have a rly sweet toothe lol

regular oreos or golden oreos? regular!

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? chocolate!! the rainbow ones taste like plastic imo

what shirt are you wearing? it’s not rly a shirt? it’s a.. camisole? i think that’s how u say it? my mom got it for me, it’s from that the despicable movie or whatever it was called

what is your phone background? lock screen is julia wicker, home screen is julia and marina

are you outgoing or shy? generally shy but id depends on who i am with i guess

do you like it when people play with your hair? if i like the person (even as friends, just as long as im comfortable with them) then hell yes i love it! if it’s a stranger or someone i rly dont like then no obvs

do you like your neighbors? i dont rly know them tbh

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? ye usually once when i wake up and once before going to bed.

have you ever been high? nah i was able to take like 2 drags and then i died coughing

have you ever been drunk? nope:( not from lack of trying lol but the taste is so gross it makes me feel a bit nauseous

last thing you ate? bread with requeijao

favorite lyrics right now the lyrics of “trem bala”. deadss considering getting part of it tattooed cause it’s so... deep? and good? and it’s sigh it’s rly good if anyone is interested i can translate is lol

summer or winter? winter

day or night? night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? white tho milk is a close second

favorite month? hmmm idk? maybe november cause mah bday?

what is your zodiac sign scorpio

who was the last person you cried in front of? i rarely cry and even more rarely cry in front of others so i dont rly remember but if i had to guess probably my mom?

#about #personal #idk how to tag this lmao #thanks for the ask haha #handsy-hollis

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