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dontworryihaveyourblorbos · 20 days

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I don’t really know how to say this in a better way so imma just say it

If you think John Dory is a bad character then respectfully, you have no idea what being an oldest sibling is like.

He didn’t abandon his brothers. He was pushed to a point of having to be responsible for four younger brothers, ranging from baby to teenager, trying to coordinate and pull off good if not perfect shows, trying to help Rosiepuff raise both them and himself while also dealing with trollstice and the troll tree while also struggling with an ever growing *need* to be perfect. It doesn’t matter how much you love your siblings- if you’re stressed enough, you’re going to snap and you’re going to snap at them. And you know what? He probably hated himself for that too. And for the fact that he couldn’t be perfect. Any oldest sibling knows the guilt of not being good enough and presumably tearing down their younger siblings in the process…it’s awful. No fuckin wonder he walked away, bro was what, 17?? 18??? He shouldn’t have had to do that. And he didn’t just abandon his brothers knowing what was gonna happen to Branch. From his perspective, he walked away knowing full well Spruce and Clay could step up, and that Rosiepuff would still be there. He had no way of knowing Branch would end up alone and gray, because if he did, he never would have left.

John Dory is not a bad character. He loves his brothers.

Edit: some people are saying he didn’t come back until he needed something. He came back to an empty troll tree- he thought his brothers were dead. He probably only left for a few months or so! He didn’t abandon them. He had every intention to come back and did. His family was just gone.

#idk if this is a vent or an analysis #I’m just so tired of people making him out to be an unloving brother #guys #he thought they were dead #he was *so* excited to see all of them and they wouldn’t even give him a hug #being an older/oldest sibling is fuckin hard #I’m the second oldest of a bunch of kids in similar age ranges to Brozone #when I tell you #I would snap way sooner than he did #it’s just not fair to him or his character to say he abandoned them on purpose #or that he brazenly made them be something they didn’t want to be for the band with no regrets #I guarantee you #it kept him up at night when he fought with his brothers #he probably hated himself for making his brothers unhappy #but what else could he do #he was stressed out and desperate #John Dory is not a bad character #he’s an oldest brother who didn’t get a chance to finish his own childhood.#trolls #trolls band together #dreamworks trolls #trolls John Dory #trolls jd #realizations #rambles #brozone

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coffeenonsense · 4 months

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I usually try to stay in my lane most of the time (mostly bc I am far too old for fandom drama) but what the hell, it's friday, let's put that lit degree to use:

the way people are playing morality politics with fiction is really starting to genuinely irk me and I think some of the responses to ascended astarion are a perfect example of why this type of thinking is actually hugely detrimental to one's ability to meaningfully engage with fiction and also to the future of art.

astarion is one of the most well-written complex characters I've seen in recent years bar none (and I'm clearly not alone given the explosion of his personal fandom lol) and he has a truly compelling, emotionally resonant character arc whether you ascend him or not

If you keep him a spawn, you get a deeply touching, realistic character's journey to healing and personal growth where he learns who he is after the experience of his trauma and depending on the player's choice, explores his relationship to sex, romance and intimacy

If you ascend astarion, you get an equally emotional and well-rounded character arc where he chooses the power that allows him to have the desperate freedom and safety he's wanted, but in the process eschews any hope of real healing or personal development, and again, depending on the player's choices, restarts the cycle of abuse by taking cazador's place.

These options offer vastly different paths for the character and experiences for the player, but while yes, ascended astarion is the evil ending, and yes, ascending astarion is a tragedy, and a fucking incredible one (not only do you have astarion reigniting a circle of abuse but you have the narrative weight of KNOWING he could have actually overcome his trauma...hats off to the bg3 team tbh) but that does not mean ascending astarion MAKES YOU AS THE PLAYER EVIL

Ascend astarion because you love tragic story arcs, ascend him because you want to indulge in a master/slave vampire fantasy, don't ascend him because you want a healing character journey, don't ascend him because you want a sweet romance; all of these choices carry the same moral weight for the player, which is to say, none, because they are an exploration of fiction.

I know I'm saying this to the villain fucker website but it bears repeating; just because someone wants to engage with evil, fucked up characters or content does not mean they support evil acts in their real life, and furthermore, exploring dark, taboo or tragic concepts safely is part of what fiction is for. It enables us to look at those things from a distance, work through difficult feelings and develop greater understanding of what makes our fellow humans tick — and before you get it twisted there's also no moral issue with exploring fucked up media bc you're horny or just, because. You can take it as seriously (or as sexily) as you want.

It's starting to really concern me how many people not only do not get, but are violently opposed to this concept, because equating what someone likes in fiction with their real life moral code and actions is an incredibly dangerous and let's be honest, immature way of thinking that not only stunts your ability to engage with fiction but ironically, hampers your ability to deal with complicated issues and emotions in real life.

I don't know what's driving this trend (though purity culture is certainly playing a role) but it's definitely something that's not just impacting individuals but contributing to the commercialization of art, where we get games and stories and tv shows and books that regurgitate the same safe, mass marketable plotlines and character archetypes over and over and over again so corporations can squeeze out as much profit as possible.

Anyway, remember kids: There's no such thing as thought crime, reaching for morally pure unproblematic media is directly contributing to the death of art, and this is why funding the humanities is important.

#so...yeah #idk man i have thoughts and feelings #and i love astarion so much lol #astarion #ascended astarion #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #fandom analysis #media analysis #fiction #a personal rant because i need to vent about this and i just recalled i have a blog where i can indeed do so lol #astarion ancunin

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mitamicah · 2 months

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An aromantic autistic reading of Joker Out's "Bluza"/"the Blouse"

I have a few words about Bluza. The Blouse.

When I first heard the title, I felt a connection to this song yet in a very tongue-in-cheek way. Because I read the working title was a nod to the white holed sweater blouse (the slut shirt) Bojan forgot at Jere’s place last autumn. But then thanks to JokerOutSubs I realized that this song really speaks to me in another way.

Disclaimer: I am speaking about this from an autistic aroace point of view and as a person who has masked most their lives and doesn’t drink. I hope to explain why this matters in the post below.

The lines that especially spoke to me are these: Ja ko pijana budala Ali čaše nisam popio Jamislim da sam se zaljubio u tebe

I’m acting like a drunk idiot But I haven’t had a single glass I think I’ve fallen in love with you

As a person who has spend most my life being critical about what to say, do, and how I show of myself to people I see the drunkenness described here not as literal but as a form of unmasking. When you find that one person you feel so comfortable around that you know that they won’t leave you or care if you stop being presentable in the eyes of society.

The result is that you may seem drunk and out of character when you are close to them. Drunk as in unlike yourself but also much more yourself. You dare to be authentic and to be silly and vulnerable because this person next to you gets you. No alcohol you could consume would fill you with as much giddiness as being with this person does. There is something about this one person that just speaks to you and let you know that you are safe.

While not having been drunk myself this is what I expect is the feeling most drunk people are searching for: the experience of not caring about what other people might think about them anymore. They just exist outside time and space in a bubble of bliss.

The person in the song is that for Bojan. His bubble of bliss – his safe space.

I’ve been lucky enough to have people like that too for small periods of time. And just like the next line I have felt very strongly connected to the person in those moments thinking “is this was love feels like?”. And here I don’t necessarily mean romantic attraction/love. I mean love as in a deeper, more profound level. The love that is outside of bodily desire. It is two spirits – two beings finding a home in the other person. A home where you can be giddy and drunk without having touch a single drink.

It is no secret that I love the idea of queer platonic love. When I read this, I read it as queer platonic. I read it as beautifully strange, brotherly, romantic, and platonic all at once.

The chorus kind of develops this feeling and adds and aromantic layer to it: Baš ja Koji nisam verovao Da za nekim biću lud

Yes, me who didn’t believe I would be crazy about someone

I read this as a very much an aspec experience.

You may have gone most of your life feeling othered for not experiencing those feelings of romantic attraction the world around you constantly tell you that you should.

Then this person comes along. This person that is your haven, that you can fool around with and open up around. There’s something that seems different, seems honest and so it brings you that feeling of bliss I mentioned earlier. That feeling the world around you have tried to tell you exists for years, yet you never believed would happen to you.

You may have believed yourself to be broken or maybe the world around you too much for seemingly being crazy about love. But now in this moment of bliss, drunk without having drunk, you get it. You want to be with this person, do all the silly things the media tells you are romantic. Not because you are forced to but because it would mean spending more time with your person. And every little second you can spend with your person feels like a blessing.

That is my take on the song at least. Thank you for reading.

#my first try making an analysis that I can remember so please be kind #I just couldn't stop thinking about it #almost cried when I read the lyrics #and this may just be a sappy song idk but it spoke to me this way #so I offer you my aro and ausitic reading of it it here #thank you to jokeroutsubs for the quick translation that gave me the chance to babble about this song #I feel so honored having been in the crowd that heard it the first time live :'3 #I really adore sta bih ja too but mostly for how catchy it is #it is pretty as well when you know the lyrics #but this prechorus chorus just spoke to my aching queer platonic aro heart #okay I am done venting now #joker out #bluza #the blouse #mine #micahs thoughts

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wilhelmsbee · 3 months

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Okay honestly? I'll just take you up on that offer because I'm obsessed with your edits in general, but if you ever feel like talking some more about that Wilhelm edit you did to the song Ribs by Lorde??? Would love that because that edit lives rent-free in my head! (no pressure though, I just like the idea of like... director's commentary or something for edits haha)

I HOPE EVERYONE IS READY FOR ME TO BE INSANELY DEEP ABOUT THIS EDIT OH MY GOD

preface: i talk ab why i chose each scene for the lyrics, then colouring/font, idk if this is the directors commentary you wanted but like this is how I think about all my edits

We're reeling through the midnight streets- initially, I actually wanted to start it on the this dream isn't feeling sweet line but it just didn't fit in instagrams 1-minute time frame ANYWAY This scene has always been the most painful to me. Wilhelm realises at this moment that he's truly, undeniably alone in his life. Everyone he trusts (or is supposed to trust) has left him, and he has nobody left to go to. He's alone, going through his own personal hell, finding out his only family cares more about public perception than him as a person. It's like the beginning of the worst spiral we see from Wilhelm. Its quite a literal scene-to-lyric moment, but also the we're part feels (to me) like him-as-well-as his public self. Crown Prince Wilhelm and Wille are such separate parts, and its all he has left.

And I've never felt more alone- The THERAPY SCENE! Specifically this is the I think it's better not knowing how it could feel scene, because that truly is the most heartbreaking viewpoint I've ever seen from a character. It was better not being in love because I couldn't miss it. He might be getting closer to the other boys in the secret society, as well as Felice, but he's not really breaking past the surface level with anyone. Not even Felice knows the depths of his pain, he keeps it all to himself. The loneliness crushes him, he wishes he didn't know how love felt. As far as he's concerned, he's never loving someone else again (true) and he's never going to be able to love Simon again (false). In this moment there's this feeling of emptiness. He has nothing he actually cares about, and he wishes that he never cared in the first place.

It feels so scary, getting old- He wasn't supposed to fill this role, giving a speech as the Crown Prince of Sweden about his brother's passing. Wilhelm's character (obviously) fundamentally switches after Erik's death. He used to be a lot sillier, more reckless and more willing to fight back against his parents. But now he's got every single eye on him, watching him. Put into an adult role at the age of sixteen, forced to carry the burden of spare his whole childhood, then suddenly forced to be the sole heir. Even if he had planned to maybe one day be the heir (which he didn't, judging by the he should be here instead of me comment) it wasn't supposed to happen until he was older and wiser. He stops acting like a kid because he can't be a kid anymore. The cuts between the frog/getting the frog/breaking the globe aimed to emphasise this. He's lost all connection to his brother, he's in a place he didn't expect to be until he was extremely old (if ever), and he's lost control of his own life.

We can talk it so good, we can make it so divine, we can talk it good how we wish it would be all the time- I wanted to frame Simon in this as a sort of healthy distraction for Wilhelm. He was the only person in his life who actually looked out for him and cared. They're happy and they're smiling, all the clips are intimate even if there's someone else there. It highlights how they care. It's good, it's divine. It's what kept him happy after the hardest thing in his life (so far). In this edit, he desperately wants it back because he knows how much it helped. It was the only bright thing he had. The cutting to Wilhelm alone in s2 after how we wish it would be all the time just aims to really enforce that he wished it was still like that, wishing for someone who truly cared and loved him. It's all yearning, pining, wishing things were better. Every single clip is a clip in which Wilhelm has been pining over Simon. There's an ache he expresses that was just so, so important to this edit.

This dream isn't feeling sweet- Lots of clips of Wilhelm trying to process things. He's been forced to change his entire life, after all being a prince is a privilege, not a punishment. The 'dream' of being royal crushes him, despite the fact he can't ever voice it. Walking down the halls of his castle, sitting in his private boarding school therapy session with an actual therapist, being driven home in a private car from the party where he was filmed fighting. These luxuries juxtaposed with his actual circumstances hurt. He can't complain because he's got it best in the country, but it isn't a system designed for him, it doesn't want to help him, it wants to make him conform. It isn't fair, but he can't say that.

We're reeling through the midnight streets- He's forcing himself to try and fit the mould while also being himself, and all it causes is pain. He's actively fighting against the institution he was raised in simply by existing. The panic attack from being perceived holding Simon's hand. Deleting his contact after his mother told him 'no more mistakes.' Trying to play nice at the dinner table even though his whole life was crumbling around him and the institution was failing everyone even though nobody believed him. The panic attack/anxiety vomit from Simon going public, against Wilhelm's institution, knowing that he might not be able to protect him. He's got no control in any of these scenes, its a desperate fight against himself. He's a publicity risk to his own family if he is true to himself, and he's a risk to himself if he isn't.

And I've never felt more alone- Desperately trying to comfort himself when nobody else can (or wants to) comfort him. After the fight at the party all his family cared about was the PR response. When August said that Simon would take the fall for the drugs, all he cared about was getting Alexander back. During the uniform tailoring, all Jan-Olof cared about was tradition and making Simon as background as he could. When Wilhelm gave up meditating to soothe his anxiety, he was upset at his inability to calm down, despite the fact he's never been given an opportunity to be calm. Nobody really knows about his mental health struggles, he just has to fight through them and desperately try to self-soothe. Nobody else will comfort him after all.

It feels so scary getting old- Each of these scenes show Wilhelm being viewed as his role instead of being viewed as a person. He clearly struggles with being viewed as just the Crown Prince of Sweden, especially since that was never supposed to be his role, so of course it hurts when he's viewed as just a pawn in the Royal Family. Especially from people he loves. Yes, it was undeniably hard when he first became the Crown Prince, and it absolutely would've crushed him to know that when he had a panic attack he couldn't be alone. But these scenes are interlaced with him being viewed as a political pawn by Simon and his mother. People he loves, people he trusts. He's just a public statement to his mother, and he's just a human representation of the Crown to Simon (in these scenes not in general ofc). He's never going to be able to be his own person again, because he's got a country to run when he grows up and a public image to form between now and then.

This dream isn't feeling sweet- The lyrics are now getting more compounding, it's louder and it's closer. He's fighting to be heard, he's being ripped off of his desk, he's forcing down a panic attack because he needs to be happy for Simon. His emotions aren't allowed, he can't feel anything negative so he won't feel anything at all. Nothing in his life feels good anymore, so he's fighting the losing battle to just try to break even. Nobody would dream of this, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. He can't even voice that, though.

We're reeling through the midnight streets- Now he's reminiscing about when things were easier, but they weren't, really. Yes, the placard was there the night he first kissed Simon, but that was also the beginning of the horrific realisation he wasn't built for the world he is forced to live in. His mother says 'no more mistakes' and he already knows it means he has to leave Simon. When that doesn't work and it all falls out, he's left to try and clean his own image up by nailing the closet shut with every fibre of his being. His life wasn't better, he's grasping for anything to show him life will be okay again. Everything has crumbled and now he's got nothing, so he yearns for when he had something, even if it was just something to lose.

And I've never felt more alone- He is constantly left. Something that isn't brought up enough is how often he's just abandoned. He has no one to talk to, he's forced to work through his struggles alone because his existence is political and any sign of weakness being public could reflect badly on his family. He becomes the embodiment of the Prince he could never be. Walking to the lake and reminiscing about when he would be happy there. Being left alone by his brother, who didn't even reply to him asking to say hi to his mother and father, who he then never sees in person again. Then wearing his brother's jacket. He's alone, and all he does is pine for a time when he wasn't. All he wants to do is go back and do it all again, and he can't. But he also can't move forward, he doesn't want to, he doesn't know how.

It feels so scary- Only two scenes so I'll discuss 'em one by one: -At Erik's funeral, there's a more literal fear of getting old. I don't want to repeat myself more than I already have but obviously, that forced Wilhelm to grow up and be more mature, and act like a Crown Prince instead of just the Prince. More attention, less room for error. He's terrified of fucking it up, and there's nobody who can help him. -The breakup scene is more metaphorical. He has to grow up and figure out what he wants to do with his life, while also having to grow to understand what he actually has the ability to do with his life. He's not ready to do this because he wants things to be good and happy but it was ripped away from him. He can't just pretend everything is alright anymore, but the amount of maturing he needs to do seems impossible at this moment, especially knowing he was in love with a boy when he wasn't allowed to be. He tries to be both a Prince and Wilhelm and all it did was betray his boyfriend's trust.

getting old- Wilhelm shutting his computer and pressing his hands to his eyes. It's exhausting. He's exhausted. Constantly working to try and be who he's supposed to be as well as being himself and trying to navigate his emotions in a vulnerable state is just too much. He can't carry it all, so he just gives up for a moment. It all goes quiet, but not in a good way. When you're that overwhelmed, the lack of anything just leaves more room to spiral.

FONT CHOICES

Intro: literally my handwriting. I wanted this to feel personal and almost like a desperate written plea to go back to when it was good, and what's more personal than my own handwriting am I right!!!

First chorus loop: Magazine font, it's in pieces and it doesn't match. There's a sporadic chaos, like he's beginning to feel it but it isn't there yet. The text isn't fully opaque, it's in front of him. We're seeing it before he does in this context. Trying to reflect how the media knows things before he does, like his brothers death, the tape leaking, all that good stuff.

Second chorus loop: Big, Bold, Unavoidable! I rotobrushed Wilhelm in every scene so that the text could be intertwined with him. He can't escape the reality of his situation, he is getting crushed by these feelings. The song gets louder and more claustrophobic, the text is in the scenes with him. It haunts him, it's everywhere. When he closes the laptop and it all goes silent, its not relaxing, it just makes you anxious in a different way.

COLOURING

I actually chose the blues from the intro scene, mainly in the night sky bit of the frame. Also! All the happy Wilmon scenes have a higher saturation, though you can't tell because of how I did the colouring. It just results in them being a little bit brighter, because things were good then and I believe it should feel good then, too.

#ellieoughposting #ellieeditrambles #new tag for if anyone else asks me ab any of my edits #cannot stress enough ill write one of these for any edit you want #just ask #anyway #edit analysis #wilmon edit #no beta we die like erik #wilhelm x ribs #also idk how else to mention this but this edit was a vent edit #like yes i think this hard about vent edits i have autism i cant not think

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mari-lair · 5 months

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some of you are too comfortable on Anon so I am disabling it from my asks for now, chill.

#i love asks truly i do! I adore when people show interest in aus or arts or analysis or canon BUT #don't vent on my inbox??#or ask things that will put me on fire when you KNOW I can't reply privately to Anons??#or give me 'reasons why i shouldn't like' someting I explicitly love?#ugh #...honestly idk if i am just anxious from a long day and misinterpreting some of these cause one was *explicitly* antagonistic #and another gave me twitter flashbacks #but i am just deleting them i am too old to argue with what might as well be a kid #i'll bring anon back tho is just for now i usually love anons #i got a lot of old ones i haven't replied to yet anyways so i shall stop procrastinating on that

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artificial-horizon · 2 years

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Being visibly mixed race/racially ambiguous and visibly trans/GNC is being inherently confusing and unreadable to white cis people. Like, they can tell you're sure as hell not a white man or woman but they can't decipher you beyond that; they don't know how what to do with you because they can't put you in any category.

You are both masculine and feminine, but not enough of either to fulfil the white criteria for manhood or womanhood, and regardless, brown people are gendered differently to white people anyway. You could tick off almost all the criteria for "male" features (such as, and notably, body hair) and still be read as a cis woman, because the level of masculinity white people accept in brown (perceived) women is higher than what they accept in white (perceived) women, because brownness itself is masculine to them. (Though it can be feminine and androgynous at the same time, too. Again, POC are gendered differently than white people.)

They have these set ideas of how they're meant to relate to people, set ways that they treat, let's say, white women, Black men, East Asian women, Middle Eastern men - but they can't even tell what you are, so how are they meant to treat you? How are they meant to relate to you?

I don't doubt at all that this is why I've always been ignored in public, even before transitioning; never treated as a fellow person to connect with, but an anomaly that happens to occupy the same spaces. I scare them by defying categorization, so it's better not to engage and risk upsetting their preconceived notions of gender and race. Alternatively, they will just be bigots instead, though I can tell that's hard for them too as they aren't quite sure what specific flavour of bigotry to throw at me.

[cw for following paragraph: non-graphic description of an incident of racist and transphobic harassment]

I always think back to this one time, having recently come out, when I was harassed by a white man on the bus. Seeing me in all my gender ambiguity and reading me as Black, he expressed his disgust at us Black people, at how "you can never fucking tell whether they're girls or boys". Honestly, in all my interactions with white cis people from then on, I never stopped feeling the echoes of his words.

#im venting so apologies if this is worded badly and/or some of it isnt good analysis #i have many thoughts but i'm really struggling to put them into words #also @ the last paragraph i am a mixed black person hence saying us jic that needed to be said #me writing things #racism #transphobia #mixed race #biracial #multiracial #brown and trans #trans poc #idk any tags that are about the intersection of gender and race or transness and race #also is there a term for that type of oppression anyway?#like if not there definitely should be cos POC are oppressed along gender lines in white supremacist society #and its not necessarily transphobia or homophobia or misogyny #its specifically the oppression that comes from not meeting gender standards because they are inherently based on whiteness

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