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bomberqueen17 · 1 year

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alive

i am alive, i promise, sorry it’s been all queue of late

i made 28 quarts of chicken stock today-- well, packaged it-- actually i made it too, we’d cut the chickens up yesterday and stuck the stock pot in the walk-in cooler overnight but today i put the water in and plonked it on the stove, an enormous stock pot, and simmered it all day while we cut up the rest of the chickens. (yesterday’s chickens we cut up were for sausage, today’s were for sale as parts.) tomorrow we’re ostensibly making the sausage, we’ll see how that goes.

since CSA is over, Farmsister was available to help us today-- but just like last time she helped us, mostly what we needed her to do was to take everything out of the upright freezer in the commercial kitchen and find other places for it to go, which was a heroic undertaking and took her like two hours. it was a lot. she had to restock the farm store just to make room. so it was good, things are beautifully restocked, everything is organized and beautiful, but like, good lord, at what cost.

anyway i just stuck 28 quarts of chicken stock in there so tomorrow we’re gonna have to ask her to do it again, but i believe in her.

i have done like. zero writing this week. lots of 10+ hour days of work, so. oh the insulation in my cabin has been great though. i know it’s november now so i should expect it to be chilly but it’s been like-- warmish during the days mostly, and then in the evening it’s fine and i have actually woken up too hot and sweating twice in the last few days because i was still wearing pajamas and dressing my bed like i expected it to be in the mid-40s in the room where i’m sleeping and... well it’s not.

there’s a mouse making so much fucking noise though, and i haven’t been sleeping well because the fucker like, pitter-patters around the room while i’m trying to sleep. he’s louder because he has to rustle in through the insulation. the roof edging isn’t on properly yet so i cant’ exclude him. so a side project is that i’ve had cayenne steeping in water most of the week, and today i set it up with coffee filters and rubber bands over the mouths of jars, and filtered it into a spray bottle, and i’ve just sprayed cayenne water all along the bottom of the insulation where he’s been coming in. (I know because i can hear him and also see him.) so we’ll see how much noise he makes tonight. i don’t know that cayenne will actually deter him.

anyway i’m gonna have my queue post this tomorrow morning so idk, i’ll hopefully know by then. but i’m so tired, using the queue gives me a minute to proofread and then if i wake up in the middle of the night like “i used that word wrong” i have time to look again when i wake up.

i have so many writing projects underway and no time to work on them. i spent a bunch of time today while i was packaging cold dead raw meat thinking about various projects. it was a nice escape.

here is a surprise snippet from a background bit i’m working on, going slightly back in time to before Ciri re-established the Upper Aedirn Free State, featuring a new OC i’m going to make room for-- a very elderly elf named Faerveren who has aged out of the concept of gender, to give us some unexpected backstory.

Faerveren leaned in the doorway, giving the dh’oine who had so rudely knocked a once-over. He was tall, handsome, self-assured, though he looked a little tired and travel-worn, and the haughty arrogance of his expression was covering a bit of uncertainty.

“I’m looking for Caerulia Fitzhugh,” he said.

“I bet you are,” Faerveren said. “Since she lives here.” Faerveren xerself hadn’t lived here terribly long. The Fitzhughs had kindly offered xer a place to stay after xe had come to them injured and ill after the battle for the city. Many elves had needed treatment, but only Faerveren had merited the permanent invitation. Perhaps because the Fitzhughs could appreciate xer age. It was restful, being among others with a similar perspective on the passage of time.

Faerveren watched the dh’oine’s expression go through disbelief into indignance, and relented slightly. “Are you here on behalf of someone who is sick?”

“No,” he said, frowning, “I need her help.” His frown deepened. “I believe it is not a matter that your kind could understand, elder brother.” He used an Aen Seidhe term, showing that he wasn’t entirely ignorant.

“Ah,” Faerveren said, “I’m no one’s brother. But I see, you are not the dh’oine you look.” Neither were the Fitzhughs. This was vampire business, then. Another of the reasons Faerveren had been invited to stay was likely the complete lack of reaction xe’d had to the revelation that both Fitzhughs were bruxae. But Faerveren’s people had lived in peace with higher vampires, never their prey and never their antagonists, so it hadn’t been alarming to figure it out. It wasn’t as though they were particularly secretive about it. They tended not to shift or fly where anyone could see them, but Caerulia had a habit of gliding around without touching the ground because of an old foot injury, and nobody seemed to notice. The dwarves of Vergen were singularly unconcerned about vampires as well.

“No,” the man said. “Can you tell her, Dettlaff is here? She knows me, though it has been years since we spoke.”

Faerveren sighed. “Perhaps you should come in and sit down,” xe said.

#snippet post #my writing #about the author #farm life

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janedoe-ing · 2 years

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MY type of dream house

i am DEFINITELY manifesting for this, saw some tiktoks of these people that has a house complete with lots of technologies and weird tools that is actually really brilliant and make sense to me. so that is basically where the idea for this post came from, and let me tell you, i am like one of the biggest fans of household stuff (i know its weird), but trust me, i am still 19 and not 91.

so my house would be a simple double storey landed house, and if it is a corner lot unit, i swear its definitely 100% better. i think for the interior, paint and stuff, idk how to explain it but ill be attaching some photos that i think is the most similar ones than what i had in mind.

p/s: ill be updating this from time to time, since i haven't and didn't remember most of the appliances that i saw from that one tiktok account

ok this is like the general idea how the living room looks like... i loveeeeeeee monotone stuff...

ok so here's the fun part:

ill definitely buy that type of mop where we don't need to squeeze the water out manually, like i want those mops where it squeezes the water itself or like at least by pulling something over the cloth and i can just start mopping after that. like literally any mop except for the ones that need me to touch the strands (since the head of the mop is shaped in strands) or basically the traditional ones.

i want white floors/tiles because i think its way easier to see any dirty stuff or dust, i know i won't stay the fuck still until i see that place is clean. (plus point, they get SUPER COLD under ACs etc.)

tbh theres like more stuff that i saw from those tiktoks that i think i would purchase when i have my own house but ive forgotten what it is so i might update this one later lol.

but i do know that i will buy stuff that is multifunctional, like even the decorations can be used as something too. why have only the aesthetics when you can have both?

kitchen part: fav part

fridge: organised with labels and organisers. its so satisfying i swear to god when it comes to restocking. also i aim to put leftovers in a proper tupperware and not just slightly put them in a plastic bag and just shove it inside the fridge

sink:

the drains: ill make sure it will be one of the drain tops that can be removed and put again, so i could throw any big food leftovers etc when we are cleaning the sink.

i think i would install a waste disposer too inside the sink so it would be easier to remove and clean the sinks, plus it takes a lot to clog it since the waste would be chopped into smaller bits.

3. coway. a must. or it could come as one with the refrigerator. that works better i guess, it took less space.

4. AN ELECTRIC STOVE. save the world people, too many pollutions already. oh also, i hope that it is one of the saving energy ones. high electricity bills would be a bummer.

5. installing solar power panels. save electricity, save money bla bla bla.

6. basically all the electricity appliances etc will be power saving ones.

7. OH ALSO i want a sink that has a sensor so i won't waste any water.

8. oven + microwave is a must.

9. i hope there's like a pantry for dry stuff?? like the spices and things. i hate to see things being clumped up against or beside each other and be ignored at the end of the day since it was hidden in the corners and shit.

10. i want to install a different type of tiles at the kitchen, since i know it will be oily and have food spills etc, i want it to be tiles that doesn't stain and also easy to clean, easy to dry if possible.

will be updated somehow later.

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its-deputy-caleb · 3 years

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haiiiiiiiiiiiiii can we get a john x fem reader wherein the reader is the doctor and a friend of the macfarlanes and they patch him up after getting shot by bill LOL (rdr1!! i’m not sure if you’ve played that but if you havent it’s ok to ignore this tysm :3)

WOAHH this is long overdue but I haven’t played the first (don’t kill me) so I decided to watch a 10hr play through— I’m yet to finish it cause its long and I’m watching it in short segments but I think I could tackle this. I really hope this doesn’t flop bc idk what I’m doing lmao.

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It’s just a regular afternoon when Bonnie returns back to the ranch, you’re cleaning some of the medical cabinets, making lists of what needs to be topped up when you next take a trip to town or the Ranch’s general store. It’s light work for an easy afternoon but that all change pretty quickly when Bonnie came storming through the door, asking you for help on a man who’d been shot and needed urgent medical attention.

The list of medicines is dropped to the floor as she shows you to one of the units where he was currently laid out in the bed. You sat down, clearing his shirt and jacket to stop the bleeding and clean the wound. You were well focused on your work, stitching up the wound with practiced ease and addressing his other minor injuries like the small cut to the back of his head from hitting the ground and the bruising to his ribs from the bullet wound. Unbeknown to you, Bonnie has taken a stand behind your shoulder to watch you work.

“Damn fool thought he could take out Bill Williamson.”

“Bill Williamson?”

You could only stare down in surprise at the unconscious man before you. A man like Bill Williamson was not to be reckoned with, especially in a shootout if the evidence before you is anything to go by.

It took a few more hours of care but Bonnie stayed with you to make light of the situation and keep you company, only coming and going to bring back any supplies you needed. Once you’d properly bandaged his abdomen you stood from the shabby wooden stool you were sitting on and dusted your hands. You collected your tools into your bag and placed a soft hand to Bonnie’s shoulder.

“He should be fine now. He’s going to need lots of rest while his wound heals and he’ll probably be disoriented and dehydrated when he wakes but nothing more, you’ll find me if his condition worsens?”

Bonnie gave you a short nod in agreement, happy to stay with him for a few hours while you went and got some rest.

John woke with a splitting headache and a burning pain in his side. The events of the last few days coming back to him. He didn’t get time to think about it much however, when a golden haired woman came through the door, instantly giving him a light hearted lecture about chasing after Bill Williamson and getting shot at.

“Well while you may have done something stupid— we got to you in time and the Doc fixed you up real fine, got the bullets removed a few days ago. You’re a lucky man Mr…err?”

John made his way to the edge of the bed, sitting up and groaning at the pain that is usual for a bullet wound.

“Mr. Marston— John Marston and I suppose I should be thankin’ him for fixing me up.”

The woman leaned against the handle of the door, watching him shuffle on his feet awkwardly as she smirked at him.

“Bonnie MacFarlane. Miss, Bonnie MacFarlane and I hope you do thank her. She did a real fine job of takin’ care of you. She spends her mornings up on the hill by one of the large oak trees by the paddock, I suggest you pay her a visit before you start working off your medical bills.”

And with that, John picked up his hat from the wooden table that Bonnie had saved for him and started making his way over to you.

You were standing over by one of the smaller sheep paddocks off to the side of the MacFarlane Ranch and took in a deep breath, basking in the morning sun and leaning your elbows against the fence. You usually took the mornings to yourself, having half an hour to wake up slowly and enjoy yourself before you tented to a range of injuries and illnesses. Having been longtime friends to Bonnie and her father, your family had always been respected at the ranch and that came with certain privileges such as time off work in the morning.

Your peaceful moment was distributed, but not unpleasantly as you noticed the man who Bonnie bought in yesterday walking towards you. When he reached a certain distance his hat came off and held it in his hands, flattening his stringy hair as he addressed you.

“Pardon me ma’am, I didn’t mean to disturb you. Miss MacFarlane said you were the one needed thanking for taking care o’ me— so thank you.”

You noticed how he fiddled with the brim of his hat in his hands, trying not to look what you’d guess was embarrassed.

After you two introduced each other and you accepted John’s thanks, you offered for him to come and stand beside you by the fence.

“So who does a man have to be to go after an outlaw and bandit such as Bill Williamson?”

Your question was supposed to be lighthearted and fun, ready to tease him just as Bonnie had done for waltzing into Fort Mercer alone. You didn’t expect for John to answer you honestly

“An old friend…”

You stared at him in shock but he didn’t seem to notice as he stared out into the paddock of grazing sheep.

“Wait you know Bill Williamson?”

He could only nod for a moment, giving you a polite but almost sad smile at what seemed like a painful memory.

“Yes ma’am. There was a time when Bill and I weren’t so different.”

You actually spent a lot longer than you’d anticipated talking to John. For some reason unknown to you, John seemed to open up a fair bit. Maybe it all came down to the fact that you were approachable and kind, a quality you needed as the ranches doctor. Nevertheless he spent hours telling you about some of his time with the old ‘Van Der Linde Gang’. John spoke of train robberies and homesteads, what it was like to steal from folk and live wildly. He even mentioned gang rivalries and the epic tale of surviving a wolf attack.

He told you of some of the best times and even the worst but all of them were distance memories and he seemed quick to change the topic about why exactly he wanted to ‘reunite’ with Bill.

“What about you, Miss? How’d you end up here? Don’t see many female doctors around— w-with no offence intended ma’am.”

You let out a small laugh, hearing his curiosity turn to something desperate as he realised he may have been offensive. You kept your weight on one elbow, facing towards him and smiled.

“Well my daddy is the head doctor but he’s now semi retired. He’s a good man but he wasn’t always a doctor. A long time ago, when I was just a little girl our family were ranch handlers just like Bonnie’s family, but well… one season all the cattle got sick and were dying so my father moved to medicine. The MacFarlane’s are old friends and we’ve been with them ever since.”

John hummed, turning his gaze from you to stare at the vast Ranch that was almost a village in his eyes.

“Seem like good people— real decent folk.”

You nodded in response, growing up on this ranch became your home and you loved the MacFarlane’s very deeply.

“Indeed they are Mr.Marston, decent folk are hard to come by these days.”

Your pleasant conversation with John was suddenly interrupted by Bonnie who whistled down by the stables, clearly signalling for John to come and assist her with chores around the ranch. You could only hope that meant seeing more of John.

“It seems Miss MacFarlane will be needing my help. Thank you again ma’am, you saved my life.”

You didn’t get to say much as John took your hand in his, brining it to his mouth in a polite kiss to your knuckle before walking down the hill. He didn’t get far before you stopped him one last time.

“Oh Mr. Marston! I need to ride into town tomorrow to restock on medicines that they don’t stock at the general store. Would you be so kind as to accompany me?”

You eyes were full of hope and joy as he nodded and gave you a warm smile.

“It’s John, and I could think of nothing better than to help you ma’am”

You couldn’t stop the smile that spread onto your face as you watched John load his horse and ride of with Bonnie and a few others to work at various places around the ranch. You couldn’t stop the fluttery feeling in your stomach either at the anticipation and excitement of getting to see the mysterious but intriguing man John Marston.

(I will do a part 2 since i need more time to get a feel for rdr1!!)

#wow my first rdr1 fic #i have no idea what im doing #if this is horrible pls tell me bc i am soo lost #but i hope i did johnny justice here #and yes i promise a part 2 #john marston #john marston x reader #john marston imagines #red dead redemption 1 #red dead redemption #rdr1 #rdr2 #fem!reader

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justtogetthrough · 2 years

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I spent 6 hours in the ER tonight to be diagnosed with food borne illness and offered no pain management for the first 5 of those hours despite me being balled up and crying in pain bc literally nobody came to check on me for 4 hours. At the 1 hour mark upon arrival is when I got put in a room from the triage/waiting area and I was like hey nurse I'm doing real bad bc x and y and she was like you're going straight to a room so I'm sure you'll be seen quickly. And then I saw no one for 4 hours except when I pressed the call button at hour 4 crying and having a panic attack and asking if I should just leave cuz apparently there's no medical reason anyone feels I should be there and she's like no no the doctor will come and I mean... he did... but not for another hour and a quarter and I was in 9 out of 10 pain alone in a hospital room crying for hours and literally nobody gave a shit. Adulthood sucks. I had just gotten up to grab my coat and leave when the doctor walked in to draw blood. And they have the gall to post signs in the rooms saying nurses will check in every hour during the day to check on pain, potty, position, and personal belongings "its called the 4 p rounding in the ED". I want to file a complaint and be like TELL ME WHY NO ONE CHECKED ON ME FOR 4 HOURS, AND WHY IT TOOK 5 HOURS TO GET PAIN RELIEF WHEN MY LITERAL PRESENTING COMPLAINT WAS PAIN ALL DAY FLUCTUATING BETEEEN 6 AND 10 OUT OF 10. As soon as they injected the antiinflammatory into my arm at hour 5.25 since arriva to triage the improvement was significant and the crying stopped and its like wow. I could have had this hours ago. I wasn't drug seeking. Fucking toradol is all it took, its not a narcotic, and it worked and I was satisfied and I want to know why a doctor didn't check in on my pain within the first hour of getting a room to see what I needed to function. That toradol injection at hour 2 not hour 5 would have made this night a lot less hellish and spared my neighbours from listening to me cry and hyperventilate for 30-40 minutes straight.

I am much happier to be crying in my own bed now than in the fucking hospital where everyone just ignored the sounds of a person in extreme suffering.

At this point I would rather die from some random medical misfortune slowly and painfully at home then ever voluntarily attend my local hospital man. It's literal hell on earth.

I'll go there for stitches when I'm not in medical need besides sewing up a wound and I can bring a book. But if I'm suffering in any way, the hospital is the last place to go. I need to restock my home pharmacy with OTC and illicit drugs and I'm self medicating from here on out. If I could stitch myself I would and trust me I've checked Amazon for suture kits. They seem suspect. Once I find a real kit with real tools, I will never step foot in a hospital again.

Ps, med students link me up with suture kits, I'll pay you for them. Amazon sells practice kits and idk if theyre truly skinsafe. I need what you use and I have 2 decades experience watching it done and am probably autistic and would research the fuck out of it and do it 100% properly minus the med school qualification. Hook me up please. This is a serious request.

This post is written on xanax and zopiclone and will form the basics of my complaint I will be losing with the hospital thanks. I need to ask my kid if he still wants to lodge a complaint about his mistreatment in November. We can navigate that process together. It's a life skill. Reporting concerns is not the same as complaining but the complaint process is necessary and it needs to be used when services are harmful and negligent and both of our situations warrant formal complaints and apology letters for mishandling our medical needs.

So that could be a tomorrow thing given I refuse to work after this week I've had so yep. Day off, boss can't convince me otherwise and likely won't. So reading up on hospital complaint procedures and connecting with my kid about whether he wants to do his too. His complaint was way more violating so I suspect he won't, but I think he should. Up to him though. People, institutions, etc all need to be held accountable and if they dont know we're unhappy or the whack shit their employees are doing, we are failing our responsibility to take part in social democracy.

That's my drugged up rant for tonight. I am upset.

#personal #medblr #med school #medical professionals #med student

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buoyantsaturn · 7 years

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okay im a slut for angst iD kill for a solangelo fic with mental illness or self harm?? idk

obvi theres a big warning here for self harm and mental illness so if youre not cool with that dont read under this cut ok lets go

will my boy is depressed like hes always had seasonal depression but honestly just bc of Past Experiences he gets so much self doubt and anxiety on top of it like he constantly terrified that he’s Next like the last two head counsellors before him both died in a war????? hes amazed that he lived through the last war bc like people die in threes u know??? so hes super anxious about the fact that maybe he wasnt supposed to survive the war but also why isnt he a better healer that he couldnt save the people that DID die??? Maybe he deserved to die bc he couldnt save the others

so when will was a kid he used to just be like,,,, slow in the winter, never wanted to get out of bed or anything, was generally just a lot less happy until the sun came out or unless he was taking vitamin D supplements ((dont think like that i mean the literal vitamin that helps with seasonal depression))

then when he got older and the self doubt and anxiety and everything else set in he just started taking worse care of himself in general like he would get super anxious to the point where he couldnt eat for like entire days and he would barely sleep so he would spend even more of his time in the infirmary organizing things and taking inventory.

one time it was the middle of the night he’s having a terrible time and hes restocking the beds and finds something sharp like a scalpel or something and without even thinking about it he just slices across his wrist. He freaks himself out and immediately heals his arm and sterilizes the scalpel and then runs back to his cabin to wake up kayla bc he needs to talk to somebody about this before he starts feeling worse about himself

nico isnt really depressed hes just had a bad life. he does have PTSD

let me tell u ptsd explains so much about nico im gonna list off some symptoms ok

agitation, irritability, hostility, hypervigilance, self-destructive behavior, or social isolation; flashbacks, fear, severe anxiety, or mistrust; loss of interest or pleasure in activities, guilt, or loneliness; insomnia or nightmares; emotional detachment or unwanted thoughts

I wasnt even going to list all of them i was going to leave some out but they all fit,,,,, so well,,,,,,,, i was also going to explain why for some of these but i kinda also feel like i dont need to

so when nico gets back from tartarus and things start to calm down is when a lot of these symptoms set in and tbh with like half of them people dont even notice a difference bc nico’s always been kinda hostile and irritable and isolated but its when he starts losing the interest to do anything is when people (will, probably) start to notice that somethings wrong

one of the main things he did was stop swordfighting for a little while but will and the other apollo kids help nico through a lot of stuff and chiron decides it would be a good idea for nico to start teaching a few low-level swordfighting classes to occupy his mind

thanks for the suggestion!!!

#ask #anonymous #solangelo #self harm tw

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