#idk i mean all these choices i could do

[leaderintitleonly]

I’m in total agony but I’m back online. Had to stop to get fuel and be told to stop being a moron and take pain medication. Because... sometimes even the most seasoned of us disabled people forget. Anyway: Go with me on this wild thought, Doc and Grumpy are just Ryan and Shane from Buzzfeed/Watcher and you can’t convince me otherwise. It’s just Grumpy hopping on a bridge yelling it’s his bridge now. And Doc apologizing to the goat man who probably is in fear of Grumpy right now. Do I have other personalities in mind for other muses and their friends/SECRET LOOOOOVERS/etc? Yeah of course I do. But Hey There Demons It’s Me, Ya Boi

#heigh ho mun #if it could just rain this migraine could go away and i could dress in drag and do the hula #well i mean i can't but ya know maybe i could be public about more of these idk #pinocchio and jiminy are ninja sex party and it's just jiminy silently threatening people while pinocchio sings #jiminy obviously is ninja brian he totally has a phd in uhhhhhhhh in being a simp #but no pinocchio just his voice going up two octaves and I HAVE AN IDEA LET'S KICK IT #...listen you have no idea what a fantasy it is to live in with cool patrol in your head and it's all in toon form #it's such self entertainment #my brain just goes WHOOPSIE and there it goes a full fantasy while i go GODDAMMIT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE PRODUCTIVE #let's see who reads THESE notes #yo i'm slowly making all my muses and their ships and family ships in the sims and i am just enjoying myself #spellcaster blue is gonna be so much fun but do i make her a teacher do you think she'd like that #idk i mean all these choices i could do

[spacelazarwolf]

always wild to get the most horrifically transphobic comments from someone then check their profile to see they have “she/they” in their bio.

#and it’s so weird bc they always come from this odd place of being defensive of womanhood #like in a very te/rfy way #like ‘well you’re a MAN now so you couldn’t POSSIBLY understand what us FEMMES go through’ #like bestie that was literally me a year ago #i fully do understand #it feels very ‘silence gender traitor’ #and like #idk how to say this in a less abrasive way #but changing your pronouns or being nonbinary doesn’t mean you can’t be transphobic #bc in the past few weeks i’ve experienced a WEIRD amount of transphobia from non transitioning nonbinary people #who just REFUSE to get that our experiences are different #or who look down on me for making the ‘wrong’ choice in my transition #and like obviously not all nonbinary ppl are like this #but a lot of non transitioning ppl who were afab tend to be vulnerable to falling for te/rf rhetoric #just by virtue of their life experiences and which communities they often start out in #and like this is obviously part of a larger conversation abt ra/df/rn rhetoric in queer spaces #but it’s just one of those things i wish i could talk abt without ppl immediately jumping to conclusions abt my views

[halalgirlmeg]

I'm very weary of narratives and dynamics that paint people of color as like bullies, or intolerant/bigoted, or anything of the sort against white characters cause it's not that we're infallible either within specific communities or as a collective but like...idk like I feel like we're usually in these roles more often than not (its ESP Black women and girls, and Dark skin women and girls even moreso) like, esp when shows tout themselves as progressive cause knowing how Fandoms roll esp in regards to bleeding into actors off screen I just know there are people like going the hell in, because even when they're not bad people at all or just like a fleshed out human beings let them do one thing wrong, or do something fans don't like, people never shut the fuck up about it (look at Meredith and Amelia from Grey's vs Maggie and Bailey, esp in like the second half of the Grey's run) meanwhile white characters can never do anything wrong ever even when they're very much in the wrong which hmmm does that not also sound like real life?

#tbh this is about a lot of shows but I keep seeing clips of that show heartbreak high #and it's this lesbian couple I think and one is white and autistic and the other one is Asian #and I always see clips of the asian girl being very like abelist and mean and people talking about her #which she seems to always be ragging on her gf one way or another which obviously no one should be doing that #but again there's always an implication that we as woc are always the aggressor or mean #and it's like why did you make that choice #of you've actually seen it tell me if I'm wrong #but it's like I kind of can't unsee this dynamic it happens a lot in television and film #it's like when people wanna do this Black people vs LGBT ppl very much ignoring all the people with both identities #but also acting as if Black people are just so intolerant that we don't know any better or could even be supportive if not a part of #these groups #I'm sure this applies to other groups too I'm just speaking on my own experiences at this second #idk if I'm making sense it's like 3 am #random

[junotter]

sometimes researching for avatar redesigns has you 6 layers deep into the Japan's Meiji era allies wiki

#im trying to mess with some of the stuff that feels weird about the ways the fire nation is depicted idk #like i do not feel optically it is good for like them to be so heavily based on japan's imperialist actions #while dressed in clothes that come from places japan colonized #but i dont want it to just be solely japanese though i did draw zuko and azula in hakama but its largely cause i wanted to draw hakama #and like the only place with strong japanese influence being kiyoshi island and my own frustration with the modern day samurai depiction #i think fundamentally it isnt a choice that had as much thought as i am putting in put into it but it does raise an eyebrow for me #anyway i think keeping the thai influence is fine despite the brief invasion japan had into thailand due to thailand then allying with japa #and further allying with the axis due to allying with japan #ugh and ive been told not to think this much about it because its fiction but its also fiction so so so heavily based on real places #and when you base fiction on real cultures you fall into some unintentional pitfalls #i also fucking hate the royal fire nation robes they look so meh and the most costumey out of everything in the show #they look like heavy blankets despite being a supposedly hot nation #theres ways to have heavy robes (heian era japan) but they look like i make them out of fleece and velvet blankets #back to kiyoshi island i think the really only aesthetically japanese reference in the show being an island of noble warriors is lame #plus over done #it feels like nowadays theres a lot of people who get all whiney about people saying fire nation is based off japan #but like dude the creators in the comics and korra like go even more into the japanese influence and clearly it was the original intentions #also i do think you could do some pretty interesting world building by having say there be an older cultural influence on kiyoshi island #from the fire nation especially if the place is established as a central port area then you tie in some okinawan or even hawaiian reference #and gives an explanation that makes sense to why kiyoshi stands out from the rest of the earth kingdom you have long term cultural trading #and it establishes interesting relationships even pre kiyoshi time thereby drawing back onto some real historic references #cause for awhile ryukyu china and japan used to be this trading triangle which could explain some of these various influences going on #i think you can get a really interesting harmony when you create the fire nation out of a mix of japan and thailand #i mean both have these floating buildings due to living on some pretty wet lands and theres harmony in that mix #god i did see one person go like “fire nation is more based on china because theres a lot of red and red is important in china” #my brother in christ red is also important in japan #red is important in like many many asian cultures #i mean of course a lot of that importance stems from china and cultural exchange with china but idk kinda silly to say with your whole ches #like if you want to bring china in then the dragons are the biggest thing like sure some mythos has dragons in japan #but a lot of those comes from china in some way

[poliodeuces]

mask off i do not like the theory that ramuda's cloned from rei's wife.............

#i cant tell exactly why alright i just do not like it at all..... #ive always been a fan of stella's scientist ramuda. i think it would be cool if the person ramuda's cloned from is just rei's colleague #or a close friend #like i Know his wife could also be both of these which is the only way ypu could sell the theory to me #as far as we know ramuda's clones are also made w being replaceable/disposable as one of its attributes #and i dont want to think thats what rei wouldve wanted w a clone made from his wife who he seems to love v dearly #aaaa idk. what i also want is to see rei have a friend #and nayuta not just be rei's dead wife #i mean shes not confirmed dead but i meant the trope #it's different from how gentsro's brother is handled bc it was hinted from the v start #i know the inherent drama of cloning your dead loved one bc it's a huge part of tales of the abyss lol #but ugh i cant arrange my thoughts coherently sorry... #i remember first having this thought seeing rei give one of the first clones a cigarette and i wanted it to mean something #as in to relive an old memory...bc out of all the first things he couldve done it was that #or does it just mean he was indifferent to the clone's health lol bc it's definitely a choice

[katnissgirlsmakedo]

also fun fact. you can effectively punch holes in plastic glow in the dark stars using a push pin and a rock and just pressing it really hard into your carpet or something so it doesn’t damage anything once it penetrates the plastic. in case you ever needed to know that

#i hope all my actors come to the premiere because i do not think i will be finishing this shit by sunday when we stop filming #going to need to tell them i have surprise presents for them all and use that to make them come see my mid short film #i have to stop putting down my own film. it’s not going to be mid. it’s going to be good. perhaps not as good as some others in the class #but it will not be as bad as the annoying ‘men’s mental health story’ bs one group is doing #frankly i don’t give a shit about men’s mental health but whatever #actually it might not be bad as a film idk their skill levels. but i won’t care about it due to there being no women in there #actually another group is making a film with no women (except the firdged mom) but i think theirs will be good #they have a cast of two people it’s not insane that there’s no women so i’ll allow it #and also of course that guys script was very good and he was actually my first choice when we voted on who’s scripts to make #no i was not my first choice…. i was trying to be humble…. #also i wouldn’t have had to be director on his film. i could have been the bitchy production manager….. #i also would have had to go on multiple hikes due to the locations they needed. so perhaps it’s a good thing my script got voted in too #and i know i complain but i do actually like my group they’re great people to work with #even if the Annoying one and i clash sometimes. i like to think of our dynamic as Divorced Coparents #which sounds more sexy than it is. it’s not sexy at all. there’s no sex going on metaphorical or otherwise #i just mean. we clash sometimes but we also have good rapport. it’s like a tense middle school friendship #and the other guy. he’s great. cringe at times but we love him #i wish i’d known him before this semester so we could have had more time to become friends this timing kinda sucks #anyway. i don’t remember how this post started. #ok bye

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#if u r curious abt following the saga that is my life: #i did finally accept an official offer from a school this afternoon. which is a huge relief and really exciting #and for once i think i did something that will b good for me in mind and body lol bc i think i could b happy with any of the places i #applied to but this program is most geared to my interests and its in a place where i think i can have fun due to the accessibility #of nature and the mountains haha. like at rutgers i think i could have got a good education and had a lot of opportunities but i think it #would have crushed my soul a lil bc it would b more high pressure and in the city. ya kno? so i hopefully i dont regret the choice lol #i still have to wait on the offical acceptance stuff but now at least i can allow myself to get excited abt the potential project and start #researching. which i mean ill have 5yrs of a phd for that but idk im excited and my life feels so empty and meaningless rn ive gotta take #the excitement where i can haha #anyway housing is gonna b a bitch bc there arent a lot of places available in grad student price ranges in the city to the point where they #said so in the official offer rip. and i have to decide when im leaving the southwest bc i could stay til August or leave in july and take #like a whole almost 2 months to just not b doing anything for a sec. and my dad was like !!! u could go to the crazy state parks #or drive out to the pacific northwest! and that would b amazing but also that sounds so scary to do on my own lol #like i dont wanna b missing and murdered as a youngish non guy traveling alone #but i could do it if i tried im sure. anyway i just wanted to let yall kno #bc im so doom and gloom on here all the time but a transition period is looming so im only stuck here for a few more months #and hopefully itll b a page turn into a happier place haha #watch out yellowstone cyanobacteria. im coming for u >:-] #knock on wood. ya kno. just in case #hhhh at least i can breathe a lil better now i have a direction #unrelated

[belovedblabber]

It’s funny, John is never actually described as wearing the lyctor robes at any point but I think we’ve all just assumed that he would, to match his besties

#one time I did a scan through for every description of his outfit to help my partner with cosplay stuff #and he’s never described with the robes #at least to my memory I could be wrong #I mean other than when he takes mercy’s ajsjsjdj #harrow’s narration (or you know harrow’s narration as seen by gideon) frequently makes note of the robes in various scenes #and she seems to not be a huge fan of them #but she never notes John wearing them #when she does take note of John’s clothing it’s to express approval for how simple it is and for the color choice (black) etc. #so I do wonder if he’s actually intended to be wearing them #or if John doesn’t actually wear the robes #they are like #lyctor robes of office after all so idk #however by now we all so thoroughly picture him in them that it’s a mute point😂 #at some point I may turn these tags into an actual little post with photos of book passages #for fun and for my own entertainment #and for the like 6 at most people who care😂 #the locked tomb #john gaius #harrow the ninth #htn #tlt

[running-in-the-dark]

and it just occurred to me that when we move, I might try to find a new therapist. there might be one/a few right in the town we're moving to (I haven't checked), but we'll be really close to a city then. so I could get there regularly (maybe. it's very scary but maybe I can manage it). so. I should probably do that? maybe find someone who'll like.... do more than just accept that I've got social anxiety (because that's what I said when I first saw my previous therapist) and help me figure out the real problem.

#like I mean I. probably have autism or adhd yeah sure. like that's just. I'm just assuming that for now. #but. the thing that really affects me more than anything at this point #is the stupid fucking rules I have to follow because my brain makes them up and I don't have a choice #and the. well everything else that's probably all related to that. #but i don't wanna go there and be like hi I think i might have ocd #because I've been so ashamed of all of this stuff for 20+ years that the thought of talking about it with a person I have to look at and wh #will ask questions about it and then possibly say nope your brain's just really fucked up. #that thought is. so horrifying idk I don't think I could do that #but I struggle with it so much every day that. idk maybe I need to do it anyway? I didn't think I could talk about the social anxiety stuff #either and I did that for years in the end. and it helped a bit. #but idk maybe it's just. pointless? I don't know how to be any other way. I've never not lived like this? I don't remember ever not having #to follow these rules and feeling like I'm disgusting for having bad thoughts and having stupid routines that I have to follow because if I #don't a Bad Thing will happen. but that part got better so maybe it's not that serious anyway and I've just been imagining all of it #because my brain is bad and all of that. #maybe it's fine that I can't touch dirty things and that if I don't tell my husband to drive safe I have to think about him crashing the ca #and it being my fault all day and almost breaking several door handles because I have to check three times if the door is really locked and #it's never enough so it's usually 3x3 times or more. and just. #just. everything I like has to be good and pure and perfect and if it's not and I can't stop myself from liking it anyway I feel disgusting #and guilty and like I'm personally responsible for every bad thing in the world because I just can't be right. #and if I could the bad things would stop #I don't think. that's how people are supposed to think? right? I feel like if everyone spent most of their time thinking about this and #doing everything to make sure they follow these rules then. idk nothing would ever get done? it's just so hard? #but no it's probably just that I'm so bad at handling it and everything is always hard for everyone and no one complains because they're #better at being human. #idk man all I know is this is fucking exhausting and I can't do this for. however many years I'll be alive for. it's been long enough #I'm tired of it #and maybe I shouldn't be on here. maybe it's time to step away again for a while. so much of this messes with my head. I can't handle the #guilt I feel from every stupid post that I saw. oh that's something people argue about? great that's been added to the list of things that #have to feel bad about now. #doesn't matter how much I disagree on a rational level. I don't get to decide. if I know it exists it will bother me. and I can't do it

[dilfsuzanneyk]

i'm watching wendigoon's live reaction to kane pixel's the oldest view right now and the way he gushes over every detail and how it makes him feel makes me SO happy. the way he's scared but is so intrigued with it is amazing!! i hope every artist gets to experience that!! i hope every artist gets to see someone love their art so wholly and deeply that they see it Affect them. and i hope more people let themselves sit with something and let it affect them. peace and love everyone

#also can i just say. i love film theory and game theory and whatever because of this #it's still someone interacting with the art! #looking at something and going “what could this mean” is still interacting with the art and i genuinely love seeing people do it #because you cared enough!! you liked that thing enough to dig deep into it!! that's amazing!!! #and idk as an artist myself it's just. god the BEST thing ever is when someone notices a Choice you made in your art. #because that is what art is. it's so many choices made to come into one awesome thing. #i love you art.... what would i do without you #sorry! for being sappy or whatever!!! #in a space where everything seems horrible art is like. the one good thing rn. i love art so much. all forms of it. #i should be doing work actually oops #vex rambles

[drewsaturday]

you'd think as someone who's knowingly been a lesbian for over 10 years i would've watched more than like, 4 lesbian movies by now, since there were more than a handful to choose from by that point and waaaaaaaaaaay more now.

and part of me thinks i should make it a new years resolution to watch more sapphic movies to experience the culture tm and feel those feelings.

but i also want to just go rewatch loving annabelle and call it a day.

#txt #like obviously representation was very important to me! and it still is! #but i think bc my baby gay journey began right when we started getting this explosion of rep... #rep almost got tainted for me bc i was on tumblr and it was this whole thing about You Need To Watch This Or You're Homophobic #or nitpicking everything slightly wrong with problematic representation etc and it became more of a chore #i appreciate representation i don't expect most i think. like k0rrasami happening? #instead of getting dragged into the show with the promise of rep it just... unfolded in something i was already interested in #i think representation has sorta unfolded in weird ways as well over the years since it's now profitable to queerbait and that #impacts how enjoyable/well written a thing is - see: why i love 90's subtext most bc of the authenticity of it #and i like to think maybe movies aren't as impacted by that when the focus is actually queer shit vs. shows needing to pull #people in for the long-term but idk. it's genuinely not something i've seen enough queer films to have a good idea of j;lksdkfj #i just want like. fun plots that happen to be gay and i think that desire kinda extinguishes the need to consume every piece #of queer media in existence even though i did very much have that pull at the start naturally #but of course. tumblr kinda ruined that for me at the time so now i'm 10 years in the future chilling surrounded by queer people #not having that sense of feeling alone and needing More #and i think it could be healing to check out those films (as Choice as they may be) but it's not a Need if that makes sense #ohhh and while i do get a hit of meaning from seeing any kind of lesbian rep bc the normalization etc #i just don't rly feel Seen in non age gap stuff? so that limits the amt of films that check all the boxes for me as opposed to #just being a 'normal' lesbian and most films automatically being a full course meal for u #so it almost feels like too much effort aj;lksldkjf #anyway. im grateful we're here now and we have so much i just have a complicated relationship with it all #and i wanna be able to just turn that off and try checking out lesbian films now that we do have so much #bc although i don't Need it necessarily it would be nice to actually explore now that i've ditched some of the toxic tumblr mindsets #(which also i now remember included being called problematic for watching the understandably problematic rep that came years before #which probs also explains why i stayed away so long from the old AND i was too poor/ill to go to theatres for the new) #so uhhh recs welcome? regardless of if there's age gaps or not lmao aj;klsdf #specifically for films not tv shows. ive fought that fight too long.

[appreciatingtokrev]

warrior cats hyperfixation era me was so close to figuring out she’s trans and aroace. so close.

warrior cats hyperfixation era me: ‘‘yeah i usually rp as male cats :) idk i just prefer writing them and it’s easier for me to think as them than as female cats? idk i just prefer them. but irl i’m a girl xD’’

GIRL YOU ARE TRANS.

THAT’S WHY YOU PREFER PLAYING AS TOMS. BC IT REPRESENTS YOUR GENDER MORE ACCURATELY

warrior cats hyperfixation era me: ‘‘my fav clan rank? definitely healer! they don’t have to fight, they just collect herbs and treat the wounded cats. sometimes they also hunt. also they aren’t allowed a mate or kits which is a stupid rule but most of them don’t want that anyway. and yes i love rping healers who just have close friends no mate no kits no forbidden romance no nothing! but i’m omniromantic :)’’

GIRL NO. YOU ARE LITERALLY AROACE

warrior cats hyperfixation era me was so so fucking close. she was so fucking close and she still didn’t realise shit

#when i didn’t rp as healer (which i did whenever i could) i either rped as kit/app too young for romance or usually one of my two fav ocs #firscent or pearbird. firscent is a deputy n he devotes his life to his job & his siblings he’s not interested in romance or kits bc he’s+ #got his job n clanmates. that’s all he wants and needs in life. he doesn’t even wanna be leader he’s a deputy at heart #pearbird is a middle-aged widowed mother with a single kit who was an accident. she started dating the dad when she found out that she was+ #pregnant bc she wanted the kit to have 2 loving parents which she didn’t. and he liked her. but she didn’t like him romantically. but then+ #like 2 moons after the birth he fucking dies so she’s stuck with a kit she doesn’t want who looks like his father who she never wanted. + #that’s the moment in her life where i usually started rping as her. she’s bitter and grumpy and kinda mean and she can’t look her son in+ #the eyes bc he looks like his father but she genuinly cares for him and does a decent job at motherhood bc she tries with all she can. bc+ #her own parents never did n she wants her son to have a good life. they grow apart when he’s older n the only cat she stays close to is+ #her app bc she has a soft spot for her n they remain close friends until she dies in some battle when she’s pretty old #so she never has romance either. my god younger me was SO stupid #also i love pearbird so much omg i should do more with her. art fics smth smth idk #also she’s a transmasc bigender aroace now and goes by she/it/he :3 #☆—`elys rambles #oh btw i call younger me she bc. she was a she. by choice. she also was a she/they for a while. i used to be a girl yk #i still am a tiny bit tho mostly not. but yeah i used to be a she/her girl n then a she/they agender demigirl #she was stupid. in a loving way #trying past self love & acceptance asdghjhfhjg

[glimpsesofeuterpe]

.... i am real bitter about the loki s2 finale atm also seeing how it's less success in comparison to s2 hopes for s3 where they could possibly do more of stuff & outcomes are zero

#blahblah #whine in tags #🤡 #i really dont like it when they pull this shit with a character deciding to make a choice for their friends aka 'do better for everyone' #aka run the hell away aka do the glorious sacrifice & end up all alone (no one not a single one asked them about it wtf) #first with kiddo spiderman second azi now they pulled a loki into this #as much as i can see usually they mean good etc but with all the respect to flaws and struggles in this #not when you run away and go alone into stuff being all vague dramatic instead of trying to discuss it esp via time jumps #you got tons of chances to try all sorts of stuff #but talks don't work with ppl like silvie uwu-- so what? again we are talking about loki who learned a lot like he even built a whole devic #couldn't he learn her magic and just you know show her he is all honest? do time jumps with her? too simple? ooc?? #.... i don't like this type of choice making siiiiighhhh #also started to see a pattern of sorts like it becomes a whole trendy plot twist thing going on #the one where characters make choice for their significant others instead of asking and/or idk trying to talk a bit more to them? no? #i would get it if they were the only one affected by outcomes but they are not #what kind of thought or lesson could fish out of it? #like obviously it's about trying to be less stupid than them and talk to ppl instead of assuming and making choice for them #but also #it feels like western media (not so) vaguely approve control freakness nowadays? it keeps popping up treated casually like not unhealthy #it couldnt be just me glitching out?? #i def still admire dramatic themes but maan i just want kiddos be healthy and happy eventually am i asking too much lol

[mothheart]

Rito village and gerudo town themes hit so hard when I first got to each in totk combined with the sheer devastation you're met with in both of them

#everything is fucked but these hit especially hard for me #idk it almost made me tear up seeing the rito kids on their own and trying to keep the village up and running while #almost all of the adults are out trying to scavage food #this game. man. #totk spoilers #tears of the kingdom spoilers #its all so crazy to me #botw was such an empty and sad game while managing to feel lively #its 100 years after the calamity and it isnt easy by any means but life went on and each town was a little safe haven #in a century long apocalypse #totk is like. this just happened youre watching it happen youre witnessing a devastation that rivals what the calamity brought #youre losing everything again somehow after you lost almost everything #they got a few years of respite before being thrown back into the blender #link is more of a person and you can see his personality shine through even more despite all of it #he doesnt really have the weight of the world on his shoulders like he did before and yet he does #the difference is that this time. hes doing these things while KNOWING everything. its his choice. #its his desire to try to find zelda. to save everyone. #idk im crying #i could talk about it forever #botw was empty but with this unmistakable feeling of hope #totk feels so much less lonely while filling you with dread for whats to come #its so good so good #dont comment spoilers im still getting through the story im just getting some big feelings and thoughts out 🙏 #miles rambles

[veterveter]

Happiest of birthdays to the most dearly beloved @sorrydearie !!!

I have written for the occasion, yet again ill-advisedly. For being lovely & being my friend, you get the *checks notes* angst you pitched to me. There is fluff there though, if you make it to the end. (It's like a reward.)

So it takes Andrés a month before he cracks, all because it becomes tiresome, in the end. To tell Martín a story, and repeat it, and repeat it, and repeat it. To watch their plan turn from a near-complete masterpiece to a work still in progress, to witness their greatest discoveries become undone.

#Happy 🎉 birthday 🎉 I hope you have a wonderful one!! #favourite girl - the girl - 🍀💖✨ #look I may go ahead and be the first to admit that this story was above my skill level and resources / w.e. but I still wrote some stuff #berlermo #lcdp #the 'strange stylistic choice informed by the themes' of this one is the immediate repetition of certain phrases - like an echo #yes that was indeed a choice I made and I stuck to it #also mileage may vary on whether my incredible disinterest in all side character etc. is a choice or a flaw #to me it's just how I like it ✨ yolo thankfully there's other people in the fandom who'll write that stuff because I likely won't #I'll eternally be nostalgic for that time you taught me to tell a story in 600 words it seems a skill I lost and now I just #[música romántica] is my cause of death would you believe I actually rewatched parts of S3 for this too wow #also - since this is my blorbo show and tell - at the start it's mostly evenings and at the end it's mornings yish thematic choices #this one has a title so short I might actually be bothered to type it out and idk how I feel about that #I tried to stick to the timeline and then I gave up don't mind me it's not my fault that parts of it mismatch and others don't spark joy #technically I should've probably edited this more heavy-handedly - at least 3 or 4 k could stand to go - but I didn't have the resources #it's all yolo in this house tonight okay #my fics #I am actually so honoured that I can write something for your birthday do not even look at me but it means a lot to me basically