#i'm so TIRED sometimes

[lazylittledragon]

made a sticker for anyone to slap onto their work if they need to

#ramble #i've only interacted with tiktok via osmosis #but something is eating their brain matter and it makes me sad #it's fine if you only want to read light things (all power to you) but don't whine at me because i write about bad people sometimes #i'm so tired

[captainkirkk]

I want to see characters being taken care of in an explicit and worshipful way. Home-cooked meals. Hair brushed and braided by gentle hands. Little gifts just because.

I want to read about characters who are not used to kindness being bombarded by acts of service. This trope works romantically and platonically. Give me found family and acts of service - all the ways a character is wrapped up in wordless, explicit care after years of cruelty and having no idea how to handle. I need it.

#fanfiction #this is the 'comfort' part of hurt/comfort #but i want to take it to the extreme honestly #not just comfort immediately after a traumatic event #but consonant daily comfort! #being taken care of because you are loved always and unconditionally #this is the real reason why i sometimes read sugar daddy AUs even though i don't like them #i want to read about characters being SPOILED #this is also why i love the mdzs love interests so much #luo binghe is the ultimate worshipful house husband and i love that #my posts #you can tell i'm irrationally tired when i start getting tear-eyed over someone being cooked a meal

[shallowrambles]

I'm so bothered by the fetishization of twins and triplets, actually. If I could erase anything, it'd be the flippant references to this. :(

To be clear, I'm not pro-purity culture. I just- this one stings and I have to literally curate my experience so hard because of it

I can't stand when it's used as "code" for "queer experience" either because it's just positioning queer as "unnatural / evil," and that bothers the heck outta me when they're equated. Inappropriate boundary crossing, grooming, and abuse =/= insta-queer. It's like HMMM. The way ppl stan the crowley hookup when it's a shows canon incest kink interest squicks the fuck outta me and like...the whole Demon!Dean is a study in disinhibition! Disinhibition was shown as very evil / shameful / uncomfortable experience for Dean, like, the entirety of season 10...Sam even tries to comfort him about it. But because Crowley-Dean supports those sides of Dean ppl want in their ships, they overlook that aspect of it.

There's also the American-ness of howling at the moon and total "I do what I WANT" as being a good thing, when it's clearly shown as...not. There's gotta be balance, man.

Reduced inhibition is OFTEN used as circumvention of consent, as Dean recounts in his John-and-the-bar story. And disinhibitions are ofc not always a reflection of true self. I'm thinking of a neuro unit, where an injured TBI survivor hits on his granddaughter. Is that his "true personality?" Of course not! It's a loss of free will, judgment, and choice due to the injury and/or disinhibition.

And this is a show about free will, after all.

Drinking and drugging tend to ‘loosen you up’ by reducing inhibitions. But they remove your judgment and CHOICE about things, too. That's not necessarily free will. Reduced inhibitions can be enjoyable, but they can also create risks and dangers. Our inhibitions serve to keep us acting within an acceptable threshold; reducing these inhibitions can push you past the threshold.

Drug addiction is sometimes potrayed as "freeing" but ofc that isn't the complete story. Even so, the show doesn't agree that the punishment fits the crime. Like Crowley, Randy is complex, and he has real feelings and emotions for his relationships!

I feel like the Claire episode puts this in full display:

///

10x09

DEAN: All right, so I get there. I sneak in, and it is nuts. I mean, people are drinking and they’re smoking and they���re—they’re snorting whatever. There’s a five-hundred pound guy on stage with a Mohawk just screaming. And, uh, my mind is blown. I don’t even know what to do. Then this girls walks up and she says “Hey, why don’t you come over and sit down with me and my friends at our table?” All right!

SAM: Yeah, and they get him drunk. First time.

DEAN: But not fun drunk. I’m not quite sure what was in that stuff, but the room starts to spin, and I feel like I’m going to puke … forever. And right about that time, I hear him. “Dean Winchester!”

[Cas looks confused, but Sam just smiles.]

DEAN: My old man. I don’t know how, but he found me. And now I’m really freaking out, because he’s just standing there, not saying anything. I look around, and everybody else is freaking out, too. In fact, nobody’s even looking him in the eye. And finally, this one guy with, like, a safety pin through his nose and a—a “Kill Everything” tattoo looks up and he says, “Sorry, sir.”

---

[Claire is sitting on a bed by herself when she hears footsteps. The door opens, and Salinger is standing there. He motions for his men to leave, and he turns to Claire.]

SALINGER: Hi. [He finishes off his beer, then turns and locks the door.] It’s Claire, right?

[She won’t look at him, until he’s standing in front of her. He reaches down, taking hold of her chin, making her look up at him.]

You really are a pretty one, you know that?

[She lifts her leg, kneeing him in the groin. She runs to the door and tries to unlock it, but Salinger is right behind her, grabbing her as she screams.]

[One of Salinger’s men opens the front door to find Cas, Sam, and Dean standing there. Cas lifts a hand, and the man goes flying backwards.

--

CASTIEL:

Where’s the girl?

[They hear screaming come from upstairs. In the room, Claire is screaming, trying to fight Salinger off. He’s trying to hold her down, and the door flies open. Castiel is standing there, and Salinger turns to look at him, giving Claire enough of an opening to kick Salinger in the face and get up. She kicks him, over and over again.]

CASTIEL: Claire. Claire!

[Castiel grabs her arm, and she finally stops kicking. Cas leads her from the room. They walk downstairs, and Claire moves away from Cas.]

--

[Claire climbs into the back seat of the Impala, and Castiel sits beside her. Claire smiles.]

CASTIEL: Are you okay?

CLAIRE: Yeah.

[She moves over, laying her head on Castiel’s chest, wrapping her arms around him. Cas hugs her back. Sam climbs in the front seat and glances back. He turns his head back towards the house as he hears shouting, then leaves the car as fast as he can.]

///

10x10

(Scene changes to Castiel pacing in the bunker library.)

CASTIEL: She barely speaks to me.

(Sam comes into view, sitting.)

CASTIEL: She’s like a wounded animal, just watching me.

SAM: Look, Cas, you know what? You really tried to do the right thing that night. You did. This guy Claire was hanging out with, Randy, all he did was use her.

CASTIEL: Well, she thought he was kind. And for that, she loved him. Shows how little kindness there was in her life. You know, whatever Randy did, he didn’t deserve –

SAM: No, yeah, I know, I know. I hear you. Dean has had to kill before. We both have. But that was –

DEAN: That was what?

(Sam rises, surprised. Dean walks in from the war room.)

SAM: Dean.

DEAN: That was a massacre. That’s what it was. (Dean looks from Sam to Cas.)

DEAN: There was a time I was a hunter, not a stone-cold killer?

(Cas and Sam look troubled.)

DEAN: You can say it. You’re not wrong. I crossed the line. Guys, this thing’s gotta go.

(Dean looks down at the Mark of Cain on his arm.)

///

And 10x22

MR. McKINLEY: By suggesting my daughter was a slut?

DEAN: I'll admit that thought crossed my mind. Then I came here, and I smelled the deceit and the beatings and the shame that pervade this home.

MR. McKINLEY: You shut your face right now.

DEAN: And you know what? I don't blame Rose anymore. No wonder she put on that skank outfit and went out there looking for validation, right into the arms of the monster that killed her. (Dean looks at Mr. McKinley and in a very calm voice says) Joe, who did this?

#tw incest #ah the villainous incest trope #i'm so TIRED sometimes #like it's incest it's literally the fetishization of incest #usually it's written off as NOT COUNTING when it's women #and it's lifted up as heroic proof of queerness when it's men and i #I LIKE difficult topics #but demon dean is not portrayed positively #there's a balance between inhibitions and disinhibitions #like when your grandad gets a front lobe injury and comes on to you #that's not indicative that he secretly wants you it's JUST disinhibition which taken too far can BE THE REMOVAL of free will

[hajihiko]

The polycules are falling apart

#Ultimate Impostor #Hajime hinata #Mikan Tsumiki #Ibuki mioda #Ryota mitarai #Nagito Komaeda #Fuyuhiko kuzuryu #Poly ship names are so difficult. Guess not #an art #Barely. I did not have the willpower I thought I did when I started this #Anyway I'm trying so hard to manage something spooky for the spooky month but. Yknow how it is. Sometimes you dont have the spark the energ #plenty of ideas tho! #Hearing aids go on the fritz. Pictures taken have extra shadows or a hand that doesnt belong there #Etc etc ugh I dont even have words lol. I'm tired

[sunnymainecoonx]

Been thinking 'bout Fresh lately

If you guys didn't notice I got high on crack through the middle of this

#sans au #utmv #undertale au #dream sans #blueberry sans #reaper sans #Geno sans #afterdeath #sanscest #Reapertale papyrus #POODLE!!! #Also context for the Afterdeath part um god of death it isn't easy finding love #I've been planning to draw the idea way too long and um it still it just turned into crack #I'm on crack #I'm tired #and WTF am I supposed to do I do not know how to socialise I used to meow?? #vrchat isn't as fun as it sometimes is #and how do I socialise btw #someone shit on my passions earlier so like I don't think #I had a sleepover at school so I'm free today?? #um yeah sobbing motivations not motivating RAAAHHHH #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #dream is so pretty #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[torgawl]

there should be something like the bechdel test but instead of assessing if people can talk about women without mentioning men is if people can talk about characters without mentioning ships because so many people would fail miserably

#i'm so tired of seeing the same two ships being mentioned #when one of your favourite characters is popular but 99% of the content is people claiming everything they do is because they're #romantically interested in someone else to the point of stripping layers of their character </3 #like. maybe sometimes people have a personality 😭 #also why is everything romantic!!!! i'm so tired *aroace and fuck amatonormativity beams* 😤 #or *normal beam* actually

[yardsards]

hot take but you all NEED to stop telling people to kill themselves.

yes, even *those* people. i don't care if you're talking to some monster who puts live puppies into a wood chipper for fun, don't say that shit.

because mx. puppychipper isn't gonna be affected by your words.

but you know who might be affected? some innocent third party reading the words you said on a public website.

because telling people to kill themselves says "suicide is a punishment for being a bad person. bad people, upon realizing they're bad, should simply commit suicide instead of working to atone for their actions."

and that is NOT a message you wanna be normalizing to anyone, but ESPECIALLY people with depression (who, let's be real, make up a higher than average chunk of this site's userbase). whose mental illness is already telling them that 1: they're an inherently terrible worthless person no matter what they do 2: death is an appealing option.

is reading "kill yourself" once or twice gonna make them do it? nah, probably not. but reading it multiple times a day every day is gonna make their mental health worse. it's probably not good for your mental health to be saying that kind of thing, either.

just knock that shit off. the world is already so hostile to people with mental illness, and managing mental illness and unlearning unhealthy thought patterns is already so difficult. you don't need to be out here making it worse.

#eliot posts #suicide mention #animal abuse mention #i guess #ive said similar before and i just said this in the tags of another post but it deserves its own post #i am fucking TIRED of reading this shit so often #i frequently block people for saying it #sometimes i report ppl over it too if they're shitty in other ways too #i luckily don't have the ''i'm a worthless piece of shit and deserve the death penalty'' flavour of depression #but i do have the ''life is endless suffering and i want to euthanize myself'' variety of depression (or. technically bipolar.) #and reading the phrase kys Feels Bad Man w my mental illness #and i have froends w the first type and i worry about them #and one of em has told me it does affect them quite negatively to read kys #so yeah! fucking stop it!

[sunlit-mess]

I can only take so much, but lately, they have replaced my reflection. And realize I'm just as bad as them.

#messyr #doodle #vent art #idk what im feeling but im just really tired- pessimistic and agitated lately #overthinking stuff about growth as a person LMAO. Envy that builds inferiority then dissolves into insecurity ew #ive yet to accept the truth that it will never get better- so i can only be there for others until i watch them go. #And I walk back to the same cage where I grew- bc the cage is all I know. I'd watch from afar and wait- wait for what? Idk #Genuinely happy and proud to those who worked hard for that success-- an ugly thought whispers to me thinking why cant I have the same #well- people w the same situations as me- knows how unfair life is so we work twice as hard. but sometimes... It's-- not enough. #And to an unfortunate fate- it'll never be enough. and it feels as if you amount to nothing. #I've been stuck for so long- I'm convinced enough that I cannot be helped. Still I cling onto the tiniest spark of hope. #bpd #abuse mention

[hoezier]

There's something at the tip of my tongue about the parallels between Jackie and Wilson and Who We Are

How the narrator of Jackie and Wilson wants to run away with a woman that he's carved out of his imagination based on a brief interaction. How they would try the world, but good god it wasn't for them. So they run away from it into a fantasy world where they live by their own rules.

And then comes the narrator of Who We Are, who dreamt his whole life of finding someone who would hold him like water or like a knife, only to find that running away from the world will only get them so far, since "the hardest part is who we are". And only to find out that the "phantom life" he's fantasized about is actually just that: a phantom. And its absence sharpens like a knife

#hozier #sahar stfu about hozier #I'm aware that on the surface these songs are not really about the same thing #but there's something about the way that j&w narrator craves the fantasy he speaks of #that reminds me so much of the voice of Who We Are who thinks he realizes the fantasy only to watch it become a nightmare #and the contrast between the dream-fuelled lyrics of J&W that evoke daring adventures on the wide opened desert #and the sharp concise biting lyrics of who we are sung in tired resignation #and followed by near-wailing at the end #that just sticks out to me so much #it's like the whole of Unreal Unearth is just a sequence of the various voices of the self-titled album coming back #sometimes disillusioned #sometimes exhausted #sometimes resigned #sometimes wise #sometimes at peeace #sometime enraged #to sing about their most bitter disappointments and the harshest lessons they've learned over the years #and I can't stop thinking about it

[barbthebuilder]

I need so confirm something real quick

Interact if you don't mind being tagged by me.

Ignore if it bothers you.

#blog stuff #you don't need to be my mutual/follower to participate #mutuals #tagging #tag game #tagging chain #i wanna know who to tag under stuff #you can also specify what kind of tag makes you the happiest what kind of tags you ignore and what kind of tags annoy u #i'm kinda tired of always tagging the same 10 people #and I love tagging #also I sometimes feel like I'm bothering ppl so I wanna know who actually enjoys that kind of stuff

[millenniumscreampuff]

#ryou bakura #bakura #ygo #yugioh #my art #sometimes the urge to draw a tired little creature eating something is just so strong #I'm definitely not projecting my own insomnia onto him right now nooooo

[just-a-little-anxious]

remember when Vivziepop was talking about mammon before his design was fully out and she was like "he's not gonna be like the other characters. He's gonna be ugly. he's gonna look different."

and then mammon looked like every other helluva boss character with the only difference being that he was fat, except he didn't even look fat. He just looked like an inflated balloon.

#helluva boss critical #helluva boss criticism #vivziepop critical #vivziepop criticism #my posts #yeah i'm just thinking about that again #almost none of her characters actually look fat #i think the character closest to looking fat is mimzie #who is hated on by almost the whole fandom. and who is also kind of a jewish stereotype #gosh it just makes me so upset sometimes #it's not even that i hate all of her designs. I quite like a few of them #i'm just so tired of some of the shit vivzie says

[loonylooly]

watching Feysands talk about "I'll never forgive Tamlin for killing Rhys's mom and sister and hanging their wings!"... did we read the same books?? Tamlin's father and older brothers (personally I believe coerced but let's not get too opinionated) got Tamlin to tell them where they'd be, killed them, and THEY hung up the wings. And also everyone seems to conveniently forget that Rhys and his dad then massacred the entire spring court high family (is that what they're called?) INCLUDING Tamlin's completely innocent mother. If we're gonna pin Rhys's mother and sister's deaths on Tamlin (who did not do it), lets pin Tamlin's mother's death on Rhys and his dad

#They were mad that Tamlin “threw away the wings like they were nothing” #I don't remember what he did with them but i swear it's stated he didn't “throw them away like they were nothing” #i'm so tired of this fandom sometimes #leave my man alone #the allegations are FALSE he is NOT a mother murderer #also tbf i'm pretty sure it was Rhys' dad who killed Tam's mom and dad #and then Rhys killed the brothers #so i'm not exactly sure WHO killed the mother #BUT MY POINT STILL STANDS #pro tamlin #tamlin #tamlin's mom #tamlin acotar

[lyxchen]

Something I also love about Heartbreak High is how the main character is just so silly <33 Like Amerie doesn't try to be cool or fit in or anything. She's silly and weird and she knows that and she's confident in that and that makes her such a lovely and amazing main character <333

#like seriously #often the main character is kinda boring #because they always have to be this misunderstood outcast who just wants to have friends #but not amerie #she cares and she loves and she protects with all her heart and she is so fun and silly goofy and sometimes she fucks up and she's amazing #i love her so so dang much!!!! #heartbreak high #amerie wadia #lea's random thoughts #i also love how heartbreak high comes much closer to actual social relationships between sudents than a lot of other highschool shows do #like nit everybody hates everybody actually #and sometimes people become accidentally and unexpectedly close friends #like amerie with darren and quinni #that happens #and things pass #like you won't actually be forever knows for that one embarassing thing you did one time #nobody calls amerie map bitch anymore #because people move on #anyways #i'm too tired to write more about this but maybe some other time

[covertblizzard]

jaykyle au where they're theatre kids in the same school but they're not the actors jason's the scriptwriter/director and kyle is the prop manager (i don't know the official terms sorry) and they'd probably do an amazing job on the backstage setting if they could stop arguing for 5 whole seconds about their artistic visions and ideas and how "this would obviously work better this way"

#jason todd #kyle rayner #jaykyle #mypost #dc thoughts #vp of the club: maybe we should find some other people to do the job if they can't get along? #pres of the club: no they're both talented af and i want this to be raving success just knock their heads tgt and tell them to play nice or #i'll make them wear the get along shirt again #WAIT ONE SEC DONNA'S THE PRES and overseer she's pissed bcos kyle played the same role last year and he was chill then #wally's vp no 1 and backstage manager and he's thinking of kicking kyle out #dick's vp no 2 and main lead and he's thinking of kicking jason out bcos it's embarrassing and annoying to work with your younger siblings #kon helps kyle with props and bart is one of the actors and kon is jealous af about it he grumbles a little #roy is the fight scene choreographer #i'm trying to think of something for garth but the only thing that comes to mind i'm not sure are fitting enough #actor manager? weapon manager? oooh maybe pet manager if they have animals... human and pet manager???? hr department but including animals #ooooh maybe pet manager if they have animals #raven can play bart's love interest (in play) maybe (wally doesn't like it and neither does gar for very different reasons) #eddie deals with the contraptions they build for this bubble machines smoke machines lowering and raising anything mechanical #rose and cass helps with the weapons stuff they keep fighting too and roy is TIRED #connor plays the villain he didn't mean to or want to but he got dragged into it and he's really hot and gunned in for next years main lead #he doesnt want this #steph and mia are hair makeup costume department but bart and kon love to hangout and help too #jennie-lynn and bart are in-charge of socials #tim pops up a lot because so many of his friends (and brothers) are here and when he does he helps steph and mia #damian too pops up to help with pet management and sometimes prop art #this is much to dicks annoyance jason is already here can his little brothers LEAVE HIM ALONE SOMETIMES UGH #damian (taking cues from talia and bruce loverenemies dynamic and wanting an artist in-law): we should set jason and kyle up #dick: no / tim: hmm / dick: NO #i want to add the yj girls (cassie cissie greta anita) but i know too little about them right now but imagine they're there and the roles #are to be determined

[silverskye13]

He is a creature to me do you understand?

@lindentree @helsknight-daily

#spazzcat doodles #lindentree #helsknight-daily #helsknight #hermitcraft #helsmets #dragon!helsknight #i am tired and sore and i am coping with my new favorite wing-man #i was thinking really hard last night about how tired i am and it got me thinking about how sometimes you get so tired all you wanna do #is sit down and then i thought about how that would apply to wings and suddenly people with wings sounds like an olympic sport to me #could you imagine the energy it would take to hover #sure gliding on wind currents conserves energy but it's still the equivalent of holding your arms outstretched for a long time right? #anyway take all the scary what if you got tired stuff and flip it you know how after you get out of a pool and you've been swimming all day #you're just absolutely ravenous #what i'm getting at here is i bet you he descends on unsuspecting gas stations and makes off with all their snacks #the hermits wake up see helsknight and grian have broken in just to steal their high calorie chips and fuck off #that's it that's my vision