#i wouldve loved an ambiguous very much open ending i feel like that wouldve been the besg choice tbh | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bibiana112 · 2 years

Note

u said i could jump in ur inbox with all my semi coherent thoughts so heres what i have at the moment bc my mind has literally been racing for the past.. idek anymore ive been just staring at the menu screen for a while and time feels fake

was Seven actually lying about what he saw way back when or is that no more than an implication,, bc him Not lying would make for an interesting explanation for June' random fevers and allow for one hell of a good angsty scene to be real, would explain why no one else contradicts him (Snake/Light doesnt say anything about Akane not actually dying when the story is told, Aoi says she died, Clover says a girl died, and i swear there was a seperate instance where they say only 8 kids are saved) plus Akane's body disappears somehow during the safe ending, which would make sense since in that end he wouldve failed to save her past self. but that in and of itself could just be another timeline hopping kinda thing

But. Seven and the others couldve just been lying to get Junpei to do what he did and end up saving her, if that makes sense, making sure the timeline Doesnt change (keeping Akane alive). but theyd all have to be in on it for that to work and i have no idea how likely that is - especially for Clover bc i cant see her lying abt that sort of thing so easily, given how Light purposefully kept info from her to keep her from spreading it. n that brings me to smth else,

Akane in the past could obviously transmit to Junpei in the future, which is trippy as hell but cool. and theres the implication that she could do it to Aoi in the future as well (plus he knew abt the whole thing anyway), so was she able to transmit to everyone else or just those two?? Aoi is her sibling and Junpei was close to her and gave her a literal voodoo doll, so those make sense, but idk abt the others. and like. what the hell was going on w future Akane during all this. she doesnt say anything nor react in an identifiable way when Aoi says she dead, or does Junpei just not notice?? or is that from past Akane's influence?? are the two sibs just really fucking good actors?? and how did Akane pull off most of the Zero stuff anyway when shes physically there already. was it a transmitting/possession kinda thing??

im gonna stop here before this gets way too long but i have So Many Questions (and also wish we could see the kurashiki sibs in the ending. why didnt they show them i miss them)

LOVE THIS

OK OK Okay, the thing with Seven is that it's left kind of ambiguous even when looking up stuff like the creator Q and A and shit. The dude kind of had it between him being in on it to an extent and Akane messing with which version of his memories he's got access to through the field because she's just built different and can do that apparently, either way I'm pretty sure the amnesia itself was totally real and the fevers definetly were as well. Tbh Seven is the character here they gave less thought to in general unfortunately? Years and years later and we never even got a name for the poor guy (Lotus's first name is Hazuki tho!) It is also implied that Light might have been a little in on it as well or that he at the very least recognized their voices from the get go, but again, ambiguous, open to interpretation, Clover was a hundred percent clueless though, thus her going apeshit that one time and the importance of getting Junpei the bookmark so he could win her trust.

Idk about there being implication that she could transmit to Aoi honestly? Like I always figured she just tells him everything the good old fashioned way after she's successfully rescued, but there's still memory of her dying there anyway because it's a paradox. Aj, dear friend, buddie, pal have you ever heard of Schrodinger's cat? Aksjs it's kind of what she has going on, the incinerator's the box and it can only be opened nine years from when she's first trapped in it, until then she's as much dead as she is alive. ALSO LIKE YES BTW THAT'S IT, THEY'RE REALLY FUCKING GOOD ACTORS WITH NINE YEARS OR SO FOR REHEARSALS BEFOREHAND I LOVE THAT MOTIF FOR THEM VERY MUCH Which part of the Zero stuff are we talking about here that she couldn't have pulled off if she's physically there? Like I know a lot of the stuff are implied to be recordings, I think the only exception would be the Safe ending bit which was Aoi behind the mic.

Oh I can imagine you still have a ton of questions lol omg this is so cool though it is quite the experience and Idk what your take away from it is gonna be but I'm glad it seems to be Something (yeah I get that miss them too :') I did find a post somewhere saying how important it is for the themes of the game though for June to just exit stage left and not re-enter tho, no goodbye or reunion because at that point is where Junpei realizes the little girl he knew wasn't going to be anywhere anymore but he still had to help her however he could)

#Feel free to spam my 999 tags btw seeing some fan stuff always helps me digest what the hell the ending of the new thing™ was #wanna read my angsty fic about Akane telling Aoi about all the possible bad endings btw?#You're friend I can give you a link of the one I wrote about them after the ending too that I didn't publish because #well it's supposed to slap canon in the face that one lol #I saw a pretty picture one day and it made me think man if I pretend 999 is the only game this could be them so yeah #Higly recommend doing this btw especially if it hit that hard. U can ask for more details on that too tho #They mean a lot to me so I made them a little epilogue that's... nice. it's still sad tho I mean c'mon. it's me #a tag for asks

6 notes · View notes

samdyke · 3 years

Note

absolutely!!! i think a less open ending (i don’t wanna spoil anyone so i won’t get into details) would have been much better! i feel like the writer was almost afraid to commit to their own decision? do i make sense????? either go full horrific or heroic or find a place in the middle, it felt a bit cheap imo. didn’t really work as an open ending for me! i feel like after all they’ve been through a breath of fresh air was well deserved for all the characters. there was no breathing space in the fic whatsoever, and that’s okay, as LONG as the reader gets to breathe a little in the end! sorry, i spoke too much lmao i just value your opinion

(one again vague a complete kingdom spoilers) no omg dont be sorry i love talking about fic!!! that makes sense i can totally understand the way that might feel cheap. i definitely think it comes down to personal preference and thats fun and sexy!! i liked the ambiguity because it think it like....we as the reader are also taken into the effects of the monster because we dont know, either. im not sure how we couldve gone fully into unambiguous horror ending without having the ending happen and then having dean kill halia and then see that it was actually real, which feels impossible to me, or i guess if he uh, attoned?.....choosing heroic COULD have happened for sure but im not sure if it wouldve followed with how far gone they were....i dunno! i think its very interesting :o)

#asks #anons #kora.txt

8 notes · View notes

shyung-shoes · 4 years

Text

tagged by the absolutely wonderful @kyunsies <3333 (i didnt know u changed ur url till this post!! its v cute!!)

20 questions!!

1. what do you prefer to be called name wise?

my full name is jillian but everyone calls me jill (except my family, especially my mom) i love nicknames tho but have never really had one beyond jill so if u give me a nickname ill die

2. when is your birthday?

aug 28

3. where do you live

east coast babyyyy

4. three things u are doing right now?

procrastinating on an assignment, watching a drama (while you were sleeping), and ignoring the basket of laundry i need to put away

5. four fandoms that have piqued your interest right now?

apink, gwsn, astro, april!! im still very new to all these groups tho so if anyone has any content/music recs, please lemme know :D

6. how's this pandemic been treating you?

it was a lot harder at first w/ the sudden transition from college to home. i was super happy at school and it was rough on my brain to be back home. but now ive adapted more and am doing better! i cant wait to go back to school though god

7. a song u cant stop listening to right now?

gonna reveal the extremes of my music taste but uh after the bloom (alone) by gwsn and bonfire by childish gambino. also without me by eminem. idk i think ive been feeling very angry/annoyed so rap is just a good way to get it out. and ive been fuckin so hard w/ gwsn’s discography that i had to put them on here

8. recommend a movie

tune in for love! truthfully, i prefer watching tv to movies but i watched this the other day and really enjoyed it! very cute and the ending was an actually satisfying ambiguous ending which is rare i think. its on netflix :P

9. how old are u?

18- im almost always the baby among my friends :// and i think im the baby on here a lot too

10. school, university, occupation, other?

im a rising sophomore in college and currently working as a dance teacher and waiting to hear back about an internship that’s actually in my field (event managment)

11. do u prefer heat or cold?

cold! i run hot naturally so i overheat super easily and i hate that feeling of sweating and being lightheaded. winter fashion also is much more my speed with boots and big jackets and darker lip colors

12. name one fact others may not know about u

im in a sorority! i think one or two people may know on here but i dont talk a lot about it. gamma phi baby (also @kyunsies youre only 4′11?? a baby!!)

13. are u shy?

i wouldnt call myself shy, im just anxious so im much more quiet when i meet someone for the first couple times. once im comfy w/ someone, my personality really comes out for all its dramatic glory

14. do u have preferred pronouns?

she/her

15. biggest pet peeve?

almost all my pet peeves have to do w/ eating lolol cause i get really bad anxiety and sensory overload from things like chewing sounds. so when people eat with their mouths open or let their silverware scrape across their teeth frustrates the hell out of me. the last one feels very specific but it irritates me yeet

16. what is your favorite ‘dere’ type?

tsundere or dandere i guess?? when a character starts to open bc of their love interest... i love it. ESPECIALLY when that character then becomes more open w/ other people because of their love. this also probably explains my natural tendency to love scorpios i think

17. rate your life 1-10, 1 being rlly crappy and 10 being the best it could ever be

i think im a solid 7 rn! which is honestly a lot better than i wouldve given it a month ago so thats a plus. im struggling w/ some mental health things rn but honestly, im pretty content with the way things seem to be unfolding for me

18. what’s your main blog?

this one! its not my actual main blog but this is the only one i use, tumblr just wont let me make this my main bc its dumb

19. list your side blogs and wha they’re used for?

i had a voltron side blog back in 2017? i think? but i havent watched the show in years bc its problematic as fuck i just didnt realize it back then

20. is there anything u think people need to know about u before becoming friends with u?

i am an extremely inconsistent responder- i am the epitome of the will respond in 2 seconds or 2 days thing but i will always respond to your message at some point. if this is about friends irl, its that i always have an earbud in and thats not an exaggeration- listening to music always makes me less anxious so i constantly just have an earbud in in case i feel myself get jittery. so i promise i am paying attention even if it doesnt look like it- im top tier at being able to pay attention to a song and a conversation

ill tag... @wennjunhui @leexchan @iiasha @lovechwe @1of1orbit @agemnor(theres ofc no pressure!!! <33)

#thank u for the tag!!!#i love games like this #v fun v fun #tagged

5 notes · View notes

order-progress · 4 years

Text

I used to have a really entitled outlook on life. In my mind though, I was entitled to my thought processes because it was where my mind existed in the place having had come from a once far more turbulent era. Back then I didn't question things that werent outwardly obvious. I didnt question the unremarkable identities of things that exhibited no distinctions amongst one another. Life was a stream of experience, and I just did the best of choices I decided to arrange, or really actually, more like shuffle choices into a messy pile and pat myself in the back cause I could squint at it my mismatched pile of non related events and not feel guilty for putting off routine, structure and goals.

I guess it isnt so surprising to anticipate that like all my other experiences, disicpline would present itself when and if I needed it to be summoned out of wherever creative and yet very hard to imagine location i would imagine it arriving at some future, ambiguous date, just in time to make no work look like fancier no work and with ribbons on it.

Something very common happened to me, something that is happinning right now all around the world, no matter how many days, or years after i first posted this here.

My boyfriend broke up with me.

I wore my entitlement pretty high that day, because somehow, despite there having been no carefully executed plan made on ky end--some masterpiece scheme of genius where one could really see there existed some reasonable and healthy attention to tackle to fucking problem.

Nope. My mother fucking entitled ass decided id actually be shocked. Not even fake shocked. Thats how you know you have lost touch with your surroundings, because big things happen in your wake..while your awake and yet somehow your stuck on who killed the butler in the library with the candle stick.

What makes this one of the most significant event despite its occurance being fairly common globaly, is that his presence had caused me to become more aware of more of the things I would have otherwise taken in stride, none of these events were remarkable on their own, but collectivelly, I had inadvertantly cleaned up my mindspace to find neatly organized clusters of thoughts no longer blending into the subconcious like 70's urban grafitti.

I didnt hold that moment to some disporportionately skewed sugar coating scale just to get ribbons on them after they were organized,I just acknowledged them, like a breath,where as before, they were simply obstacles or pit stops that would perpetuate the chronic attention deficit I had welcomed into my head. I like to think of ADD as the worlds most innefective street sweepers, they sweep alright, but they just make a bigger mess and then you got things in places they have no business being in.

I was in a place of low self worth because of an accumulated collection of short lived and half assed adventures, disastrous endeavers and the nefarious presence of something so obscured, so black and forboding, made me avoid certain places for simply not wanting to deal with the house keeping it wouldve required to mitigate its destructive intentions.

I kept myself busy to not force the acknowledgent that this would become a source of not only my insecuruties, but then in addition to its ever increasing interconnectedness, its complexity. Its chambers that hardened like a mystical kight of armor, whose drawers were full of destructive objects and thoughts that rattled in their confinement as a means of foreshadowing something so sinister, I could not then yet fathom the destrutive ways its icy talons would engulf and twist into my everyday life simply to create chaos, and it didnt register that this was a problem because amidst this battle royale of fragments and bits of poorly put together patterns, Francisco's presense was a light whose emimation lulled me into a complacecy I hadnt anticipated

It wasnt that in this period, that I conciously made a decision to disregard the growing issue, it was the novelty of being in a loving, beautiful and mature relationship with someone that as each day grew, so did my conviction that this person was becoming the brightest fixture in an ever cramped confined hallway of possibilities.

As I stood there aware of this moment, feeling a satisfaction and a gratitude I had never felt before, I realized that I had come so far on autopilot, it was a move that was almost instinctual, I rolled my sleeves up, put on the rocky theme song, got my gym bag ready, went and bought like every stupid unessecary stupid trinket shit people buy to feel like their getting a handle and a good start on some shit, but really it just becomes the infuriating bag of junk that is now the obstacle between you and the door handle to exit your car and actually start your project.

I felt a sense of urgency, I saw how unequipped I had been and while I was and it was this moment that taught me how much I loved him. I reckognized that somehow I was one of those fucking weirdos that jumped through those seedy ass short cut type scenarios in life to give you the same effect of the real thing in less the time, kind of like a GED vs high school diploma, or plan b instead of condoms.

I recognized that there was an innate element of unneccesary risk involved in many of my accomplishments. The risk was usually always a concious decision that I would accept a certain amount of totally unnecessary consequences that typically would define the life of those people who you catch specific glimpses of in mysterious times like dawn or dusk. And be like..yea i could totally see that guy having to figure out what to do with the llama he inherited as a result of some gamble.

This was no longer an acceptable risk. It wasnt that i thought it was dangerous or scare him away, its that I am not the kind of man that wakes up and sees the problems his factory has and finally knows how to fix it and then just be okay with going to bed and put it off.

This is where I get annoyed again. I knew that I wasnt capable of actively doing something against him, because we both agreed on things, and also neither of us was completely high as fucking kite on methamphetamines while operating a forklift to tune a paino yet.

I couldnt ever feel bad about atheletes who ugly cried after being disqualified for juicing to get an unfair advantage in the sports world.

Yet once again my overwhelming confidence, my lovable man mentality of "fuck a map or tools you got grit, spit and teeth". Prevailed.

Im mad because it was this moment right here. In a sea of me being happy to grow and learn and doing the rignt thing. I saw a place i overlooked, its presence was almost like a marker that there were many other areas i needed to work on, and i got sad.

I didnt feel good enough. I felt like a mess. I felt dissapointed at the pride in nothing I had taken so many times. I was finally proud of the changes i was making again, only to be reminded in a very real way of how I never had structure, never had a fail safe implemented effectively to instead of adopting either anxiety or no fucks about an event that could have been in my power to mitigate, i either didnt even notice I missed it, or didnt care.

As I started seeing the mountain of work I had to do, I wondered what it meant about how effectively i could handle other things moving forward, it was an irrational fear that I had that I would dissapoint him because I wanted us to be happy. But i am an artistic person, people who work with details to make a larger picture learn early on how to work details, and I never evaluated just how shoddy my altertanitive crash course was like getting PlAN B instead of putting a condom on.

I can handle pressure effectively. I can be okay with my decisions. What I cant do is open up a factory, see everything that was negelcted when I now know how to fix it, and then go to sleep like nothing bothered me.

I never in my life found myself in a place where i came face to face with old life and it made me feel sad or humilated. I felt like a fraud for just having gotten lucky that everytning worked out, while he worked hard.

I suddenly felt something I never experienced before, fear in love. The moment where you realize your not a piece of shit because you actually dont want to let someone down, the moment when you feel bad because you walked around in life with luck you didnt give a second thought to and passed it off as hard work. And here was this beautiful man, whose life was suffering and hard work, and you realized all of it at once, and there I was, eager fucking beaver captain america man of the house cause now i feel like a god damned engineer since i could assemble an ikea 3 piece wrench-back the fuck up motherfuckers.

I just felt humbled and i felt driven. I also felt the pressures rise up around me and I dont know why I couldnt look away from the sight of the realization of how id been. And its not like i did it all on purpose, but from that moment on, it was as if I had something to prove to myself that at that time I couldnt understand yet because I hadnt reflected yet. And as I was taking the scenic route on ways to "punish yourself is actually how we fucking motivate ourselves around here cus were fucking men" the bigger I created something inside me that wasnt ever there. And then as the places that I had been tendering to and growing in started to not be kept, pressure in my life at home happened. And for the first time in my entire life I was embarrassed at my life.

I remember the moment I felt it, my mom leaving me at work after I lost my car. I walked 2 miles in the cold because i was infuriated that I allowed another event I could have forseen to happen.

I never in my life reflected this intensley on my actions before. Having him in my life made me realize I had been holding myself to a higher standard because I am at my best when I when I am actively building towards something. I opened a place in me I never saw with those eyes and it hurt me. I tried to let him in, and to be honest, the insecurities of him seeing all that mortiified me..not because I would be seen as a slob or this or that, i was just dissapointed that I for a time during when I needed it the most in my early life, I wasnt necessarily taught healthy ways to do things. Mostly because I came to this country at 10, didnt know english, parents worked all the time until i was 16 and then dad got sick with brain cancer and we caught it after he had a seizure cause dad apperently loved moonlighting as my biggest fan when he would go reading my journal at night.

I didnt know how to explain it to francisco. I was feeling. New concept, i was feeling out of sync, i didnt understand why it hit me so hard. I was trying to look away and orient myself on the present.

I could have just dealt with that. But i suddenly felt raw and vulnerable. My boyfriend and I were getting into arguments because I just wanted us to be closer due to this need i didnt know how to vocalize about what I was going through, and he hesitated because he probably thought id leave him if i saw his dirty secrets.

That was the one thing he really never appreciated about my love. I just knew. If everything else was as evident ..like this feelings and where they came from and how to process them healthy while ...it just all got too much. I didnt know how to tell him what I needed. I just needed him.

I started to feel like i wasnt tethered to the focused areas I was so eager to work in. I just kept telling myself communication is key we will get through it.

Then I the drugs did something I didnt expect them to. They turned off this guilt and switch. They gave me the quiet to make them come down to a more manegeable place where I wasnt overwhelmed anymore.

Because I couldnt process this in words at the time, i didnt know how to express that to him. It led to me feeling guilty for not understanding why i enjoyed doing the drugs aside from the stimulant effect. When i tried to explain it to him, it was like trying to coin a cheesy motto for a doomed cereal commercial in french, basically everuthing sounded like something he had no understamding or could relate to.

I started feeling depressed because i could see that although from his perspective we were fighting..

I was even more frustrated becauese we werent fighting. I was pretty much crying, trying to tell him in french something he didnt understand while he was yelling at me in english about me not respecting him by not speaking english.

This was the worst fucking part. Because part of the issue that led me here was accountabiliyy and communication.

I kept telling him in the only way i knew how.please im sorry i know things are getting worse. But this isnt how we are.

I thought we could get through anything.

In his mind he saw a piece of something, he ignored my emotional attachment to it..and i mean i cant blame him, other people never quit.

But even in those moments i knew i wasnt going to be other people.

And suddenly i was alone. I was depressed. I had realized that it wasnt us that was th issue so i tried so hard to communicate more effectively that he got frustrated and said i talked in loops. I felt so alone because i understood his frustration and i just needed him to trust me. But that was the perfect storm when i just got so alone feeling from his inability to just not look at me how i felt at myself. And i honestly tried to fix it in the middle of him running away and the most painful thing was that he couldnt understand and i didnt know how to say it.

I dont blame him for leaving

But a part of me breaks to my very core to know that if he just literally lookrd at me like yes i was going crZy but i was just hurting and overwhelmed.

All i wanted and needed was him.

The worst. Pain was that he didnt see that.

And i needed to explain it. And he didnt let me.

I felt like i was desperatly trying to express something of real explaination. I just honestly was desperate to because he was running.

3 notes · View notes