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impaladolan · 3 years

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What if y/n tried to sneak out again and ends up opening a door and it’s literally a conference room and grays ins sitting head of the table and it’s filled w mafia men lmaooo and she’s just like oh sorry was looking for the bathroom which is an obvious lie cos girl has one in her room and she runs away and one of them catch her and take back to grays I mean does he punish her in front of the men girl that’s up to you but even if he doesn’t I feel like it’s like a lowkey funny concept like poor girl she just tryna escape hahaha

Anonymous said

i think it would be fun if y/n just constantly winds up him now in hopes he will get sick of her antics and just tell her everything hehe like maybe one day she steals his rolex, smashes all the plates lmaoo idk now that i type that out i feel like he won’t care and just spank her ass every time (which i highly doubt she’s gonna complain about lol)

Capture - Grayson Dolan [7/-]

summary: y/n has always been a curious women, but when she stumbles upon something she’s not supposed to.. things become too much to handle...

warnings: swearing & humiliation/degradation..

a/n: do y’all want to do tags @?? and also, thank you sweet anons for the prompts! love you all 💕

The events to which had pertained early this morning continuously played on a loop in your head. Rerun after rerun, and you never ran out of film. It really made you question your decision-making skills, or rather any of the skills and manners you have acquired in your short time of living. You couldn't help the "imbalance of homeostasis" moreover your impulsive, fluctuant feelings that would come over you like a rushing water at times. It really made everything a bit more difficult to understand. In shorter terms;

What the hell even happened?

You couldn't deny or even feel guilty for the wrongdoings of this morning, but nor could you exactly excuse them. Yes, it was a heat of the moment type of thing and you really should have expected him to come barging in like that, but it still had taken you off guard. Although, when you think back to what happened, you don't regret it.

You miss it.

You miss the way it felt, to be sat atop of him and needing for his scared touch. He was like a drug. An addictive, life sucking drug that wouldn't wash away from your mind. He was all you could think about.

He is all you can think about.

The wanting demand to know his name, the request to see his godawful handsome face, the aching of his touch. Everything about him was mysterious and daunting. He drew you in, like a magnet against steel. The burning desire you have for him doesn't make sense.

How could you be in love with someone you barely know? Someone who had taken you away from everything you've ever known. A man that knows the ins and outs of you, yet you couldn't even recognize his name?

It feels like a game. A stupid, twisted fucking game that you're bound to lose to.

Sighing to your intrusive thoughts, you blow a wavering piece of hair from your face. You were stuffed under the lengthy duvet and your eyes were directed at the spinning ceiling fan above. The industrial, artificial wind-making machine upwards reminded you of a similar one placed in your room at home. Of course, this one didn't have a squeak but it still made the pit of your stomach drop in an agony-filled remembrance of home. It feels like forever ago when you used to run every morning. The feel of the harsh wind against your cheeks and the subtle pumping of your heart was washed away with the same old gray walls that you were enclosed by every single waking moment.

The sudden thought of just that sparked energy within you.

You were pretty exhausted from prior events and you thought you’d be able to get a nap or two in. But your overthinking and legitimate thoughts clouded your head and you just couldn’t find a way to sleep properly. Although now, you were ready to explore.

Well, explore the kitchen.

The mere thought of a tall glass of iced water sounds satisfactory. Especially for your often dry throat. So, you hassled out of the flooding white covers and marched straight to the door, pulling down the only thing that covers you; a large white t-shirt— presumably his. The urge to soothe the parchedness that swirled within you only strengthened as you trekked past the door and into the ominous hallway. You werent for sure if he was home or not, but at this point it really didn't matter. You were thirsty and you were gonna do something about it, one way or another.

You retraced your steps from only a few days beforehand, when you had tried to escape, which had ended in complete failure. Thinking back to it, it surprises you that he actually knew you were in the walk-in pantry the entire time.

It seems like he knows just about everything.

Like you remembered, the hall opened up into a large, modern looking kitchen that could possibly sustain an expensive restaurant if it really had to. Before you could pause in absolute awe by just gaping at it, you get straight to work in finding a glass. You swung open most of the cabinet doors, opening to mainly spice racks and pots/pans that looked pricier than your own vehicle. You finally found something that could fit the desired contents and you went straight for the fridge. Just as quickly, you dip your cup in the little boxed formation and listen to the ice cubes soothingly fall. You didn't even worry about the deafening bangs of the cubes as they fell from the dispenser, or the crackling or the cool water slipping down and around their entirety.

God, it looks like heaven.

You bring the cylindrical shape up to your lips and let the freezing water slip down your tongue and throughout your body. It cured any and everything that seemed to be wrong, at least for the moment. You dont stop your drinking until the water is fully ingested and the ice begins to burn the tip of your nose. You place the glass carefully on the counter and deeply inhale, shutting your eyes for a brief moment to think.

You’re tired of staying in that room all damn day, and you need a change of scenery. You know there’s got to be way more in this house than just the couple rooms you’ve ventured in, and what’s the worst that could happen?

Aww, he spanks your ass again?

Like that would solve anything anyway. He should know by now that it affects you differently. He seems to know everything else about you. It’s actually really frustrating. For him to know all the details and you’re left in the weird gray area that’s clueless and dumb. It makes you so aggravated and angered, and you wanted to oh so bad, put your foot down in some way.

So, that’s what you’ll do.

A devilish grin comes across your face as you leave the kitchen, waltzing into the dining area with scouring eyes. What could you possibly do to make the “almighty capturer” upset? The first thing to come across your head was unorganization.

He seems like a perfectionist, someone who likes everything put in their exact places and to not be tampered with. You share that similar quality, but you aren’t an extremist like him.

You first lay your eyes on the dining room table, the centerpiece along with the runner looking a little too nice. With a sense of urgency, you decide sabotage. Firstly, you grab the extravagant-looking art sculpture and set it on the floor. After, you crumple the cloth underneath it. With an odd smirk, you pull out all the chairs in not so orderly fashion.

Wow, Y/N, you really did some damage..

Taking a couple steps back to look at the petty mess you've made, a chuckle erupts from your mouth and you sigh yet again. You shrug the simplicity away from your head and continue your walking. You come about a spiraling staircase and instantly begin to climb it, eager to see the upper floor’s decor. Your hand slides against the railing as you become steps closer to your desired destination, another chic and modern looking domain before your eyes. Unlike the downstairs, this room held a lot more art work and a certain professionality you couldn't begin to explain, but you continued to move forward. You approach another hallway, except this one withheld a deadend, large double doors that open outward. It somehow gained your attention and you couldn't help but want a quick look inside. Nothing was really stopping you and there are no signs of him around, so why not?

You didn’t really need an answer, you just went ahead and did what was on your mind. Exerting the small amount of force needed to push down the handles, you pull the doors open wide and focus your eyes on the room’s interior.

Men, sat all along a table that led all the way up to him.

Your eyes widen in immediate shock and your jaw drops open. All of their heads turn in the direction of a barely dressed girl standing in the doorway, disrupting the importance of a meeting with their leaders.

You.

Papers were strung all over the long piece of oak and there was bustling before you rudely interrupted their transactions and communicating, but you were too frozen to react or runaway.

“What the fuck are you doing up here, Y/N?” He said your name with such a deep and dark mannerism, it made your pussy throb unexpectedly. “I- Uhm, I.. Bathroom?” Words wouldn’t come out straight, no matter how hard you tried. You felt the stares of a million, but you could only focus your gaze on him.

And he looks furious.

What could you do to escape all of this? Well, running actually. You take off just as you see him get up from his seat. You speed back down the hallway you first walked down and curved through the different paths you had taken prior. The faint “go fucking get her” that spilled from his lips had made it to your ears and a certain fear ignited within you.

You could hear the footsteps behind you, but you didn’t stop. You were almost down the steps, until that menacing touch of someone grabbing you right before freedom— immersed around you. You knew it wasn’t his arms wrapped around you, but you didn’t dare look back to see whose it actually was. You wanted to cry, struggling to stay in his grasp as he lifted you back up and into the meeting room from whence you came.

“Let her down, Marc.” His wondrous voice filled your ears and you’ve never felt so secure yet troubled in your entire lifetime. The large arms unraveled from around you and you were softly placed on the ground. You didn’t dare to look up, but instead focus on the ground beneath you.

“Get your ass over here, slut.” His dark voice filled the quiet room, and your heart plummeted at the sound of such a slur. Sadly, you could only listen to him, so you walk carefully around the table, making your way to his perch. You weren’t even fully near him until his arm reached out and clutched your wrist, forcefully pulling you towards him. He roughly laid you over his lap, in front of everyone, and pulled up the bottom of your shirt, allowing every eye to see you lower half nakedness.

And just like the early morning prospects, an echoing slap to your ass filled the room’s silence. “This is what fucking happens, Y/N. When you disobey me.” You could tell his jaw was clenched and his face was red with anger by the way he was talking. Tears began to form in your eyes, but not from the pain, but from the embarrassment.

How’re you supposed to face all the people in this room, after getting an ass whooping for the second time today?

“Guess you don’t know how to fuckin’ listen well, do you Y/N?” He kept saying your name like it was some kind of extravaganza, which humiliated you all the more. You didn’t want everyone to know who you are, laid across a grown man’s lap and getting seriously aroused amidst people.

Out of the blue, he wraps his hand around the back of your neck to pull you back up to face him, a dark red spread across your cheeks. “Lucky I don’t make you suck my fuckin’ cock in front of all of ‘em. Then they’d know you aren’t such a bad little girl, wouldn’t they?” He whispers against your ear as he sets you on his knee, facing the direction of the stone cold men veering their eyes on everything but you— away from the awful scene.

You shake your head to his words, feeling his large hands linger under your shirt. “Don’t think so? Would that embarrass you, sweetheart? Cause I couldn’t give a less fuck about that right now.” His hands continue to travel upwards, wrapping around the both of your unclothed breasts, the thin shirt material not doing much justice.

“Please, no. I-I’ll do whatever you want, just please— not here.” With those words of plea, you cross your arms over his hands and train your eyes to the floor in humiliation.

“Get back to you room, and don’t leave it. You’re on thin fucking ice, princess.”

to be continued...

a/n: don’t ask me why, i really don’t know why he has such an affinity for spanking her 🤷‍♀️ and it’s also 1:00 am that I finally finished this.. procrastination at its finest..

#dolan twins #dt #dolan twins smut #grayson #ily #ethan dolan #ethan grant dolan #grant #grayson dolan #grayson dolan fanfic #capture #grayson dolan smut

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wychive · 4 years

Text

𝙪𝙣��𝙥𝙤𝙠𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨

summary // you found your pile of ‘letters’ to hyunjin that contain thoughts that have never been said and decided to write to him one last time.

pairing(s) // hyunjin x gn!reader, hyunjin x oc, slight minho x reader

genre(s) // angst, letter fic

warning(s) // mentions of food, themes of being forgotten, vulgar wording, humiliation, overthinking

word count // 2.0k

author's note // happy birthday @noya-sannnn !! im sorry this was so late hhh you know how i am irl,, but i hope you enjoy this! i love you so much, jane <3 i apologize for the many grammar mistakes gn. i recommend listening to iu’s ending scene while reading this! btw y/n/n means your nickname.

[10/01/14, 3:55am]

dear jinnie,

hi there! it's y/n <3 i hope you're doing okay - i mean of course you are pfft anyways, just writing this short letter (more like paragraph) sort of as a venting mechanism? for things i cant tell you about lol im not so sure how you would call it, since you're so much better at words than i am. basically were like:

hyunjin: ow a brain freeze!

me: haha brain go brrrr

anyways haha yea <3 it's 4am so like,, ill see you at school!

signed,

your loser,

y/n/n

[15/02/14, 12:34am]

yo heartthrob!

im back with this kinda stuff haha it's been a whole? week? since ive written one of these so like yes..hi! i just wanted to say thanks, for today. you really know how to cheer me up huh? you really outdid yourself by setting up that little picnic for us. congrats on making the strawberry cake so perfectly <3 this day will always stay as a core memory in the back of my brain. you're too caring sometimes,,, istg you'll pay for this [maybe hugs?] >:)

signed,

your partner in crime,

y/n/n

[30/02/15, 01:29am]

jinnie-senpai~~

LMAO you hate me calling you that, doesn't change a thing though. hehe,, nways i hope you enjoyed your birthday present :) i got you that really cool skateboard that you wanted. i worked my ass off for that in my mother's garden so like,, you gotta thank me for that a thousand times :D nah jk, its a sincere gift, from me to you. i rarely do this for ANYONE so consider yourself lucky to have a best friend like me -3- also, seungmin is like….kinda the cutest person ever. introduce me to him pls, thank!

signed,

<your bestest friend3,

y/n

(p.s. you're kinda cute too,,,, ig,,, still stinkee tho)

[13/04/15, 9:04pm]

hey 'baby' (HAHAHA ihy for this)

i hope your day was okay! i didn't see much of you today (which was sort of a bummer but wtv) so like…. uh yea. you told me you were doing okay over text, which kinda surprised me because like?? we always video call lol this is kinda the first time,, but its okay, i trust you! (i really hope youre doing alright tho, i'll beat anyone up if they make you sad >:( ) you also called me 'sweetheart' today which was like…. omg wtf haha????????? that was so weird to me for some reason… a good kind of weird :D we haven't done those kinds of nicknames in a while so…. happy to know that they're back in session <3 i talked to the new girl today, she's really cool! like she knows the bean song on tiktok so like its a total win heh, ill introduce you to her tomorrow! you'll love her a lot

signed,

your 'lover',

y/n/n

[08/06/16, 10:23pm]

hey howl (hehe go back to that movie night we had)

this spring break sucks so much,, esp because youre not here (you still couldve brought me along :'[ ) but wtv i hope youre enjoying yourself. ive been hanging out with yeonnie lately and i found out she likes conan grey too like pls i love her sm. can we adopt her?? please???? she told me you guys have been video calling too and that makes me so happy!! you two are getting along so well aaa my precious babies </3

what if you developed a crush on her? haha…..jk unless?? (no jk dont shes all mine, stay away >:) ) anyways, i hope the three of us hang out soon. maybe go to that ice cream parlour where they serve the best cookies and cream?

signed,

your daisy,

y/n/n

[19/07/15, 01:23am]

peepee poopoo hello

heyheyhey!! (heh, haikyuu thingz) i hope youre doing okay! i mean sure you are, with everything going so well. also i feel like you're not telling me something. maybe it's just me? is it? i hope it is because you tell me everything,, we've been talking less these days but its okay! i know how busy you are, especially with your dad always bugging you,,

also, i think yeonbin likes you :0,, she keeps talking about you whenever we hang out. don't get me wrong, its not bad that she likes you but...something doesn't feel right. i feel like i'm being the third wheeler here and like ugh idk. haha laughs yea i think its just me.. im sorry, i didnt mean to do you like this,, anyways, ill see you soon + her too ofc- yall are inseparable lmao

signed,

your moonlight,

y/n/n

[23/07/15, 01:56am]

greetings, kind sir

lol more like mean sir but like aight KSKSK,, anyways,, how have you been? we haven't really talked in a while,, our convos are always so short with it being one-sided :/ i wish you were online more. yeonnie is ignoring me,, do you know why? i think you do,,, but when i asked you just said you didnt know. did i do something wrong? pls tell me..

she blocked my contact the other day and she won't even smile at me when i pass her in the hallways. its,, sad and stressful especially because she was the only one that would genuinely talk to me. i hate to say this,, but i miss you. us, hanging out like the best trio we are, yknow? but i dont think you miss me the same way. sorry, im getting out of hand. i know im just overreacting. im just gonna sleep ig,, good night! sweet dreams,,

signed,

your pink lemonade,

y/n/n

[25/07/15, 03:25am]

hi there

i heard you and her got together?? congrats, jinnie! im so proud of you,, especially because you never had even considered getting a girlfriend a few months earlier lmaO you really woo the ladies huh? anyways,, i hope you've been well since we last talked,, how many days has it been?? i would say nearly a week or so but honestly it feels like a hundred years,, considering you and i used to talk every day. but you have her now to keep you company.

keep this a secret but can you possibly tell me why it hurts when i see her? or when i mention her or even think of her?? is it because she's connected to you? but.. you're my best friend, so why? is it because i miss you? is it because im alone now? is it because you left me with a simple 'i have to go now,, bye y/n/n.'? im not sure either. im being silly, i apologize. ill figure it out sooner or later. sweet dreams, jinnie

signed,

your asswipe,

y/n

[25/07/15, 04:30am]

jinnie

it's because i love you.

signed,

your butterfly,

y/n

[??/08/??, 05:??am]

you

i miss your lame jokes. i miss your smile. i miss your laughs. i miss your funny faces. i miss the way your eyes twinkle. i miss th way you would make me happy just by doing the bare minimum. i miss the disaster you made when cooking breakfast. i miss the night when you snuck me out just to go to that pretty lantern event. i miss when you would call out my name everytime we met. i miss when we would share earbuds in train rides. dont you get it, hyunjin? i miss you.

[??/??/15, ??:??am]

asshole.

please tell me that isn't true, please. you're too kind to do these kinds of things, right? + i was your best friend,, then, why, why did you hurt me like this. i didnt do anything wrong.. you couldve just told me you didnt like me,,, why did she have to tell me? out of all people.

youre so pathetic for this,, i thought you were brave, bold - but youre just a fucking coward. i loved you, i really did. and i realised too late… im sorry. she,, i shouldn't have talked to her in the first place, right? i bet you knew she humiliated me, in front of everyone. of course you did, you were the only one that knew. you told her. fuck, i hate you so much (yet why do i long for you on a night like this?). you know how much that'll affect me and yet, there you are, laughing about it with her.

signed,

fuck off,

you know who i am.

[31/08/15, 03:41am]

ah, jinnie

please tell me this is just a nightmare. please, please. stop just reading my texts, please answer them. jinnie. i miss you so much. i dont care bout her, please just let me be in your arms. i dont care if you love me back, please just talk to me at least. tell me what i did wrong,, jinnie,, please,,, clear these tear stains on my cheek with kisses.

signed,

your fuck-up,

y/n

[15/09/15, 04:59am]

jinnie

why do i keep crying because of you? its been a few weeks since everything has happened. please, nothing has changed. i still love you the same even with all the hatred i have pent up in this stupid brain of mine. i wish i could just walk back in time, to where it all began.

when i first met you in third grade and you pushed me while playing soccer or maybe when we took those ridiculous prom pictures, remember those? i hope you still have them,, because i do too. i hope the pictures of us on your wall still hang there,, it'll remind you of the happy times. hm,, maybe you don't need them.

you already have millions of pictures with you and her,, i bet you printed some and replaced those with ours right? sly dog.

signed,

friend,

y/n/n

[04/02/16, 12:57am]

hey

i went to the park today and saw both of you being happy. it's nice to see your smile again. im sorry i didnt go up to you,, i just thought it would be awkward. when i heard that adorable laugh of yours, it made me realise that i lost something special. but it's okay isnt it? as your happiness matters more than mine.

signed,

y/n

[06/01/20, 08:00pm]

dear hyunjin,

im doing fine here. how about you? gosh,, how long has it been? years? since we last talked to each other. i havent heard from you since. i would just like to say i still think of you sometimes, when watering the plants or dancing while making pancakes. sometimes i think you're here with me too, just being the pals we were.

sometimes i'd see you out, just reading a book in the park or buying pasta sauce at the grocery store. it's nice to see you having a stable life. im not sure if you're still with her or not, but its good to know that you still have that large friend group. also! you're never gonna guess who im dating--

it's minho! do you remember him? the one that i used to hate,, uh yeah. he asked me out the other day- you may wonder how tf,,, i too do not know how tf but he gives the best hugs ever. he gave me the love i wanted from you. he stitched my heart back together after it broke,, i love him so much, jinnie..

it's snowing,, do you remember when we would skate on the frozen lake in front of your house? are your parents well? i wonder if your mother still has those earrings i bought for her birthday. i never told you this but your laugh and hers sound so similar.

i would just like to say thank you, for everything. you were a big part of my life, up until now. when we see each other after this, we would just be strangers. maybe flash a little smile or give a little wave whenever we greet each other but nothing more. some memories of us would flow in every now and then but it'll just be a short teaser. well, i'll be going now. smile for me, okay?

signed,

the one that loved you the most,

y/n.

taglist // @/noya-sannnn, @crvgio , @neo-shitty

reply to be in my gen taglist!

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bubbled-clouds · 3 years

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hi!!! currently at someones house with a six and four year old so time is very Not available for the asks for all my peeps who live far away and are asleep rn :)) todays themee iss what i like about you all or something that interests me or smthg nice you did for me or whatever just nice feelings :) (to my local frends youll get yours tomorrow morning as usual dw i haven’t forgotten you lovelies!!)

nia!! @herebutnotpresent

hihi!!! do i even need to say it?? YOUR ART!!!! so beautiful! i love it *sosososososo* much!!! annnd i love how you always just have a gif theyre 10/01(especially the emergency gifs i loved them💛💛) ily nia and take care!!!!

bam!!! @lion-hearts136 (ik your user!!)

HELLO bam reminds me of ka-bam but your vibes are Quite the opposite of an explosion! your vibes are like a big pink teddy bear 10/10 !! i Love how much time you put into the discord even tho we’re All just dumbasses(affectionate except for me we hate that bitch skdbd) but yeah!!! ily and take care <3

madam!!! @madam-fuck-yeah

HELLO!!! i love how easygoing you are!!! and communicating with me??? woah. thats so cool!!! i and right now thinking ‘i will text madam after i finish all of these’ so if i end up Not doing that i promise its not bc i hate you its bc i Got Distracted sdbdk apologies! ily and take care 💛💛💛

lyosha!! @lyoshaland

my favorite orange eyed yoshi 🥰🥰🥰 i Love literally everything??? about you??? youre sucha. nice person to talk with your brain’s so wack and that mixed with my brain is just a Lot of fun mwah ilysm lyosha im giving you internet hugs!! i love howw kind you are and just !!!! talking to you (also you add the best things in my pinterest board tysm 💛💛💛💛)

nana! @nanaccused

hi nanaaa!!!! my waif 🥰🥰 my tiny tol waif!!!!!! ilysm youre so amazing i love how easy you are to vibe with (does this basically mean i just love who you are as a person?? maybe??? idk how this works man) but yeah!!!! keep being you and keep texting me dkdbsj hahaha i love you???? so much???? just!!!!! ahhh youre so nice to me!!!! like you say the sweetest things and im left shellshocked just like- you said that to me?? i hope you slept well and!! i hope today is better for you and that school goes well 💛💛💛

ei!!! @the-what

(i just realized how all of these are paragraphs skdhdk i didnt even Realize hahaha) EI!!!!! *smooch* youre too kind to me!! i think i currently have six? songs (only three more >:)) anyways!!! Obviously i love your art so i think i shall Focus on smthg else! i Love how kind you are you rlly be like ‘fuck you dumb bitch’ but actually just be like ‘skdhdj im so sorry for making you feel guilty,,,’ dvsks i just get a Whiplash (soeaking of that your music taste?? amazes me??? i love it sm just how diverse you are for a pasty white bitch!!!) (strike through is really fun skdbdk) anyways i think even thought that was like (1) thing i said its enough cuz this is getting Long skbdjs apologies! i love you ei and take careee 💚💚💚💚💚💚 (yikes this was Long tm anyways-)

hella!!!! @hella1975 (you get the whole rainbow!)

ugh this bitch 🙄 jkjk ily dont worry 💛💛 what do i cherish most about you? so many things!!! your writing, how involved you are with the fandom!!! and just how?? easy you are to talk to????? please the first time when i got in the discord and saw people texting you i was like ‘theyre??? casually texting The author of taob???? w h a t ????’ (little did ik youre just a lil shit skdbjs that i love ofc youre so beautiful mwah) hahaha i was So intimidated by you (am i still intimidated? i honestly have no idea thats some deep thinking shit) but!!! now ik youre literally just vibing *insert froge emote here* thats literally you just add a british accent and there you have it anyways!!! (have i been too mean? i hope not ily hella please dont think i actually hate you bc i promise i dont 💛) MWAH ily hella and take care!! (maybe the last few are longer bc my brain works more since im home now idk apologies for all the reading im putting you through 💔💔)

EDITING BC TUMBLR NEVER CARRIED THROUGH MY STRIKETHROUGHS THE ADUACITY

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hawopro · 3 years

Text

Thoughts on tlt2.2 heavenly palace

[spoiler alert]

ok...so that was a wild ride, and exactly as i expected.

i might feel differently after finishing the books, but as a drama watcher who's seen everything except for ljm, this doesn't deserve 2.5 rating

(i do understand it's due to timing...and many people got high hope after un, but given that this was filmed way before and was shoved into the dungeon until this year, i think i can cut it some slack)

yes, there are problems with script, plot holes, editing, and pacing, etc. ( /clown/ many problems...) and just confusing as hell especially for anyone who isn’t familiar with the franchise, heck, it’s probably confusing for anyone who is familiar with the franchise still

but it's pretty much the same quality as every other drama adaptation imho??

(save for un and first half of sha hai; I mean everyone got their fav adaptation due to one reason or another, my favorite being tr16 and that’s like alternate universe pingxie fanfiction, but objectively, from a filmmaking standpoint, un and sha hai did a better job, but that’s not my point)

i said it before but i'll say it again, you might be able to enjoy this adaptation if:

you dont read the books; book fans will spit blood, buckets of them

willing to be confused and can close your eyes at the most wtf moments (like seriously just roll with it, don’t try to make sense of anything, don’t try to read too deep into anything, it will drive you insane)

like bai shu enough

in which, i met all three criteria so i didn't spit blood, I also enjoy seeing bai shu; I’ve seen worst drama, so honestly, I can just ignore everything and watch it on a shallow level.

Plot wise, it looks like theyre trying to tie everything together from tlt1 and tlt2, while also squeeze in the bit with xlh and ss, which was revealed in un, while also mention the existence of the wang and somehow forcefully jump straight to jdk being final villain and him and xg disappearing into the bronze gate... all within the last couple episodes LMAO

And this is after wasting so much time for walking in the snow, going through the exact same event as tlt2, walking in the tomb, lots of firing guns into thin air (there was a wholeass three-minute scene of just them firing guns and hitting nothing, I counted.)

there are some bad takes on characterization, and it’s hard to feel connections between all the characters and their relationship with one another (especially ss and wx, wx and pz, wx and xg, pz and xg, which are like all the crucial relationships)

but it follows the formula: initial mystery to gain clues/motive, more searching for clues, long/dangerous journey to get to destination, human vs human problem, some ljm political play/dealings on the side, actual tomb, ending on a cliffhanger

(I didn’t care for the side story with xiuxiu and the huo family tbh, it didn’t seem to have any point? Aside from sending xh to the tomb to breakup with wx? Or am I just missing something?)

anyway it’s wild af, but at the same time, fits within my expectation

the set is really nice I think; prop wise, there was only one scene that really bothered me, it’s when they uhh setting up explosives and the /hard rock/ um bounced LMAO; while i enjoyed seeing wx firing guns, that was pretty much useless, i wish that was done better

The only action i appreciate in here are when xiaohua and his right hand man are on screen; there were a few really nice throws in the choreo

CGI actually look okay? The centipede was really icky, final monster is legit sentai series boss LOL

I was meh with a-ning and ss; not my fav, ss was an asshole. But a-ning has a motorcycle! And of course can’t have a dmbj drama without bad english dubbing.

not much tsj content at all, xg doesn’t even spare pz a glance (i came out of this needing more pz and xg content) wx treats pz badly sometimes (pz deserves better) well there was a lean, but that’s all??

(ok I swear this isn’t a dissing post...? hahaha)

bai shu made a fine wu xie, he did better than i expected? But later on his acting def felt a little bit unnatural. BUT IM SOFT FOR HIM, he’s my ‘91 puppy, he also deserves better. i don’t think i would have stayed around for as long if i didn’t know/like him (na jk, i get suck into the pit either way)

zhao dongze seemed rather ...vacant. he’s also the most babey xg. he’s even babier than wx. he talks a lot. he cares for wx a lot. he doesn’t smile sadly; as far as ooc, i mean yes, but i like jbr’s xg soooo

also there are so many meme materials for this xg

both of their portrayals feel inconsistent, BUT i’ve seen better performance by them, (zdz did great in lst, which is a wuxia drama) so i will chalk that up as a directing problem

but i think it’s fine to have different renditions of wx and xg? idk it doesn’t bother me as much

there are gratuitous amount of pingxie skinship (new game: take a shot every time xg touches wx) in which i enjoy greatly; emotionally i feel theyre a bit distant, not much chemistry, but man they’re blatantly pushing the pingxie agenda with all those touches

(id like some intense eye contact pls)

theyre touching hands every time xg is on screen istg; and bc we love hands in this house, we like it a lot

If you’re here for pingxie, maybe just watch episode 18

pangxie, however, was what baited me in and kept me there

wx is mean to pz, but he’s also soft for pz, especially in the beginning; and pz in turn takes care of him so much (pz is so precious)

wx is so tsundere and pz loves to tease him; they literally went through a whole divorce (for no reason, what’s going on writers?) and got back together (without an explanation?)

there are so many pangxie gems, wx holding pz’s hand? caressing his hand??? and like pz coaxing wx to calm down by hugging him?? Pz fixing wx’s blanket even when wx was being a whole douche?? pz giving wx air kiss and wink??

pz deserves better, but man, i love all the pangxie moments in here

(so much fic material pls i desperately need--)

LMAO ig my point is there are many shortcomings, but in my personal opinion, it’s similar in quality as many of the other adaptations, and it doesn’t deserve 2.5.

yes, it’s bad as a standalone drama, but yes, i enjoyed it (some aspects of it anyway)

so if you do watch, watch it for the meager interactions between our favorite characters, pingxie/pangxie crumbs; enjoy it on a surface level, and not for the plot or anything else LOL

Ok im done rambling~

#tlt2.2 #heavenly palace on the clouds #hp stuff #rambles

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uwumessenger · 4 years

Note

Could you do the RFA and ofc V and Saeran in an ATLA universe? I love your stuff!

omg yes ofcofc ! sorry some are kinda short lol ;-; but i hope u enjoy B) i’m rewatching atla for the fourth time this quarantine wHEW

btw i feel like mc would be the avatar here...like imagine taking down rika and saving yoosung and shit lmao omg. if you reply/reblog with ur own headcanons for yourself or an oc that would be awesome sauce id love to see it although i highly doubt anyone would do that LOLOLOL IDK BUT IT’S AN OPTION

also SPOILERS for rika’s back story. if the name mika doesnt ring a bell, it’ll be a major spoiler!!!

btw i added rika as well. i was scratching my head @ how to make the plot similar while also staying as cannon as possible but i dont think that’d really work here? so sorry if the relationships are kinda confusing LMAO so saeran is not seven’s brother in this universe. mostly bc the sibling relationship between azula and zuko seemed more fitting for rika and saeran, not saeyoung and saeran, so saeran is rika’s broski here. rika and v had no romantic relationship here, too. lastly, mika is rika’s dad in this au, so she’s genderbent. will be referred to as mikah !

Yoosung

i cant imagine him living anywhere other than ba sing se

hes a pretty good earthbender but he doesnt participate in any underground fight clubs or anything

and he would definitely work in a tea shop

but he eventually joins the dai li UH OH

MC plz save this kid

Zen

um WATER TRIBE

but he cant bend </3

he definitely performs at a water tribe theater and carries every single show

helps MC find a waterbending teacher

hes kinda like sokka and is one of the reasons why MC’s team avatar can function well

honestly zen kinda reminds me of the cabbage guy too so when hes older he’d probably have a business but it’d constantly get destroyed HAHAHA

Jaehee

airbender type beat

jaehee is a MASTER and she trains avatar MC

kinda like avatar yangchen tbh

she is apart of the white lotus !! and an absolute boss at pai sho and teaches MC how to play as well

peaceful queen

would secretly watch zen’s plays on ember island before he joined team avatar and is super excited when he joins them

Jumin

jumin is a firebender

he’d be like piandao except he can bend as well. he’s the person that trains MC in firebending

invented wine in this timeline

and dont worry, elizabeth the third still exists here!! he enjoys tea with only her

part of the white lotus gang gang gang

secret fun fact: when MC was on a rest day, jumin asked zen if he wanted to train as a swordsman. zen agrees and jumin became zen’s master B)

Saeyoung/707

earthbender!!!

hes like toph; the most powerful and skilled earthbender out there

likes to make inventions in his downtime as well

and helps zen with strategizing for attack plans and whatnot

he joins team avatar and trains MC

was never really into tea and preferred inventing weird sugary drinks throughout team avatar’s journey

pop up note: the spoilers for rika’s backstory will be in rika’s hc (but is first mentioned in saeran’s) which is coming up!! scroll past or click off now if u dont want to read da spoilerz

v is lit rally just uncle iroh but younger

he does his best to get saeran back on the right path no matter what

he’d be a grand lotus in the white lotus

plays pai sho w/ jaehee every now and then

gives MC a lot of advice when they need it most. over a cup of tea ofc

yoosung’s therapist after ys leaves the dai li

also saeran’s full time therapist

and he always cares for saeran...but thinks rika is beyond repair and not worth trying to help

Saeran

literally zuko

BUT he cant firebend....considered weak and is easily manipulated by rika

eventually gets banished from the fire kingdom for embarrassing his family once so

also went into a coma after doing one (1) good thing

cant make good tea even if his life depended on it

is good by the end of the story and works with zen at his business as well as trains with jumin

wont admit it but he sees v as a father figure especially since mikah was such a shitty one lol

Rika

ok look i LOVE female villains but i do not like rika for some reason

rika is azula on crack

whoever her mom was, is long gone lol like ursa

fire lord mikah convinces rika that the fire nation is so organized and well structured that they deserve to take over the entire world but dies before their first attack

this is a nod to mika being the real brains behind mint eye and passing away before she could see it get carried out

rika believes that mikah died bc she is much more powerful than him and the universe would rather have her be the one to take over all the nations

by the end of everything no one knows what happens to rika. there’s an intense battle between her and the avatar but rika’s end is all dependent on what the MC decides.

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qyu-inactive · 4 years

Text

MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ABOUT OUTTAKES 16-18.5 BECAUSE I HAVE SO MANY

We have been blessed with 3.5 glorious new parts to the wonderful Losty Aone/ Mountain Man Series by the wonderful, amazing, awe-inspiring @shhhlikeme and i am emotional and have many many feelings about it all.

Outtake 16

I love that we got to see this from the reeader’s point of view, it was nice to see our losty y/n and see how their feeling. It was a nice break from feeling sad about Aone’s broken heart.

This part made me laugh ahaha

After dating and breaking up with him, Aone had females constantly approaching him. A/N: Not constantly but it felt that way for you ofc lol

the jealously😂, the Author’s note too like “it wasnt like that at all” 😂 this emotional person (y/n) is just blowing up the situation.

and then this:

In other words: They want what you had.

i mean of course they would, Aone is the sweetest boy but only to someone he loves. Aone’s heart is too strong to let waver to someone knew so quick

This whole outtake all i could think about was that Y/n really needs to get back with her mountain man, first they want to break up so Aone finds someone new but then doesnt want him to find someone new. Like cleary y/n is not being honest with herself or Aone.

When they went to the library, ahhh y/n really just imagining the worst scnenarios in their head😂

“Oh,” your stomach flipped. “He looks so cute.” You put on a 🥺 face when you noticed how utterly adorable a standing Takanobu looked

🥺🥺🥺 Aone is always such a cutie, and y/n really broke this man’s heart😭 I know it was insecurites but still. These two are so in love but just wont get back together.

The outfit y/n is wearing😍 you always pick these really cute and sexy outfits and I appreciate y/ns confidence and style but it is not me 😂😂 but Aone thirsting over his girl tho, i would dress up like that if it meant getting looked by Aone like that 😂

I love Aone’s plan, like he is such a sweetheart and he’s making me all soft at all his effort to win his girl back🥺🥺

This outtake really gave up all the feels y/n is feeling with breaking up with Aone and I am enjoing it 😂. At the same time though I just want these to love birds to get back together ahhhhh.

One of the things I really love about this story is how strong the friendship is and how we see the outside characters really show how much they care. A lot of stories (like shojou, oh man you dont know how much shoujo manga ive read haha) just sideline their friends after the start talking to their love interest or they dont even have friends at all in the whole story. I really enjoyed seeing Katana be a voice of reason in our losty’s life. And of course the K_nji’s being our boy Aone’s best friends.

Outtake 17

okay we starting with the real friends the K_nji’s warning our boy Aone about the situation. I love them and how much they care 😂. They can be dumbasses but still, I appreciate their effort.

The University—our University— sent her a uniform that’s a size or two too small.

Does this mean they’re going to the same university? or am I reading too much into it? It might have been mentioned before but I cant remember off the top of my head. Also Aone really living his best life and his worst life rn 😂😂 like he gets to see his girl in a super tight cheer leading uniform and spend one on one time with her but he cant do anything about his desires. His confidence tho haha “I’ve seen Y/N in a cheerleading uniform before” not like this you havent😏

Aone Takanobu can truly say—if he could speak—that he will never even question Futakuchi again.

Again I just really love their friendship, parts like this really get me 😂😂😂

When y/n took out Aone’s jacket automatically🥺🥺 my hearttttt, and how long Aone’s jacket is on them🥺🥺 this whole part made me so softtt. Like imagine wearing his jacket🥺🥺 it would be so comfy and warm.

There are so many golden lines I loved from this part, but Aone’s spank bank is just a phrase I wasnt expectng to read but it is gold. Im sure his bank is full and loaded😂

Then some random gross guy comes up to y/n, like the audacity of this guy.

He had such a disgusting grin on his face

🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 this guy can back offfff.

I really love when Aone comes in to protect the reader🥺🥺 he’s not the iron wall for nothing too.

Your knight has arrived. Your ex-knight. ☹️

and then you go and hurt me again😭😭

I really wanted Aone to just kick a dude in the chest, like step the fuck off 😂😂.

“Take one more step toward her.” Aone growled in the smoothest voice.

“I dare you.” Aone added, for good measure.

Im absolutely swooning, Aoneeeeee🥺🥺🥺. And the fact that he wanted the reader to come with him so she wouldnt get anyone bothering her😭😭 he’s such a gentlemen. No one bothers Aone’s girl whose not his girl at the moment, especially guys who arent wanted

now onto the fun part of this outtake😏 I wasn’t expecting to see texts but it was definitely a nice addtion!! Our poor Aone soo horny and sweet, I dont know if the dead squirrels worked hahaha.

but he couldn’t help but wonder how he was going to edit all of this together in the time frame he promised he would with only one hand.

this went over my head when i read it the first time omg😂😂😂 Im sure Aone can do it, he’s a very capable man. This whole section had me laughing but also feeling slightly bad for Aone, again his poor horny heart right now is conflicted but very much fed. Im glad he was able to get a break, I dont think his length could wait (im not used to using subtle language hahaha) anyway this whole part was fun to read.

Aone bit his juicy bottom lip,

I legit bit my lip just before reading this part😂

Outtake 18 & 18.5

Now we’re hitting the climax!! (after Aone just hit his climax and is about to hit again😗)

—who imo really should return to their own homes now but would rather not—

I mean do these two even have their own homes anymore😂, theyre basically apart of the Aone family now. Family who also understand when to leave their horny pal alone for time being.

OKAY ONTO THE IMPORTANT PART!!! AHHHHHHHH.

“Aone-senpai, do you even have snapchat?!”

“Obviously not.” Kenji answered for his friend, being snappy.

“WELL HE SHOULD GET IT BECAUSE I SAW—“

Did Kanji see Y/N and Takeru?????? I also cant believe I learnt Takeru was a third year from this series, I always thought he was a second year for some reason. I think cos he was ennoshita’s rival. not important rn lmao

“—because Aone-senpai is jacking off again. It makes you feel lighter, and happier—so that’s why,”

this boy, there are some things you just shouldnt say out loud. Some things can be left unsaid (not like im blunt with my friends sometimes haha but still)

When Kenji had found out about why y/n dumped Aone😭😭😭😭 I’m glad he found out earlier then Aone, I wouldnt have wanted him to yell at the reader again.

Anyone that can do that, be so selfless—is good enough for his best friend.

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

“I can tell its her because that’s your sweater she’s wearing. Right? It says Takanobu on the back, and I remember seeing Y/N steal it out of your bag after practice once.”

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺these parts really just made me soft. like the fact that y/n still had the jacket and wanted to wear it out. and the absolute coincedence that they were in the same cinema as Aone.

“Y/N.—Sh-She-She is wearing my attire. What does that mean?”

Yeah, big guy.

Yeah, you have a chance.

Y/N still has a little….tiny bit of feelings for you

YES YES YES FINALLY , I wanted to cry here😭😭 AND THEN KENJI CONFIRMED IT ALL AND AONE THE MAN WENT AND TRIED TO GET HIS GIRL. THIS REALLY IS THE DRAMATIC PART IN THE MOVIE. AND THEN THIS [redacted] TAKERU CAME AND AHHHHH

(Aone would know that face, he only saw it everyday he’s looked in the mirror for the past 3 years)

Absolutely dead. All hope—gone.

You make me happy and then just rip out my heart like 2 minutes later. I was going from crying happy tears to sad tears in like a heartbeat.

ALSO YOU DONT KNOW HOW UPSET I WAS WHEN I GOT TO THE END OF PART 18 I DIDNT REALISE THERE WAS 18.5 AND WAS AFRAID THAT THIS WAS IT AHHHHHH. I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO PLAY WITH MY FEELINGS THEN JUST LEAVE.

“I’m worried about you.” She finished, looking more serious than you’ve ever seen her.

y/n really has some good friends with her🥺

uhhh then Takeru comes in, I dont really hate him but no one stands in between our losties love, they deserve each other and no one can stand between them.

“But, tonight, if you need a shoulder to cry on, I’m just one theatre over… Okay? I have a pretty comfortable shoulder, so just text me.”

Okay this was pretty nice of Takeru, like cheesy but at least he cares and isnt staring at y/n like a peace of meat he wants to devour...

You sent it. Received a response within seconds saying he was on his way.

This boy, hes got a good heart but this isn’t your story bud, im sorry.

There! Kenji-san and Koganagewa-san, two males who were looking at you and Takeru as if you two were the villains in the movie that just popped out of the screen.

if this doesnt go well these two seem like they’re going to fight y/n outside the cinema😭😂 I couldnt imagine getting death stares from the K_njis especially after hurting Aone basically twice now.

Finding HIM was all that mattered.

OKAY THIS WHOLE PART, LIKE YES GO GET YOUR MAN PLEASE. LIKE Y/N CANT JUST LEAVE THIS RIGHT HERE LIKE THIS.

white hair visible only because his head was down, forehead kissing the steering wheel, his shoulders vibrating slightly because he is crying. It’s him.

I cant take anymore sad Aone😭😭 He needs the biggest hug and his girl to be his girl again. He has gone through so much.

“Kenji-san, please leave me—““Not Justin Bieber look-alike!”

I cant with the Justin Bieber look-alike. 😂😂

Im just going to talk about my feelings for this part, but the whole confesson. I felt like crying, i feel like crying now reading it😭 it was just so beautiful. Like y/n explaing everything and saying Aone is the only man she’ll ever love. Throughout the series we really go to understand Aone’s feelings so deeply and how passionate he is but we didnt really get to see how y/n felt as much so reading this made me happy for Aone for the fact that his girl loves him as much as he loves her. They really were lost for each other, lost with out each other, but together they were

Found.

okay maybe im tearing up now😭😭

One more marathon to go and our happy couple can live happily. The fact that this story is nearly over is a little sad but I’m happy our losties found each other. Im thinking since the next parts will be the last I’ll talk about overall themes I liked and my favourite moments as well.

#shhhlikeme #Losty Aone #Losty mountain man series #this took longer then i expected but i can finally post it!!!!

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nisaadventures · 4 years

Text

I’m turning 30 in 10 days... yikes.

The last year of my life has sucked... lol. Okay, it wasn’t all bad. I’m exaggerating... but I’m also not. I know there were plenty of nice moments in the last year... but when I think about the last year of my life, its just full of so many firsts... awful firsts...

First time celebrating their birthdays without them...

First holiday season without them... anyone else miss mom’s turkey? Most people don’t like traditional thanksgiving dinner because the turkey is more often dry... mom’s was never dry... Okay the key people.. Don’t actually cook your stuffing in the turkey. Its just going to suck all the juice life out of your bird... I mean come on. Trick #1 stuff the turkey with fresh cut oranges and yes, you can leave the skin on... #2 do majority of the oven time in an oven bag to keep the moisture in. #3 cook breasts down. Its the part thats usually most dry, so duh... keep it in the juicy, buttery goodness of the pan. I never made the entire meal, I usually just helped mom with everything. These are just some things I’ve taken away in my observations.

Halloween trip to Disneyland without them... Disney is always a good time, but I’d be lying if I said my heart didn’t feel heavy in some way... and that is saying something because Disneyland is my happy place lol.

Looking forward to 2020... Hoping that it had so much better in store for us.

Dear lord... what a joke.

Going to Hawaii for our “family trip” without them...

A pandemic without them... I mean yes, I’m thankful they aren’t out there with COVID on the rise... I’m glad they’re not stuck at home because COVID. Mom and Michael are both too much of busy bees to be cooped up in the house for too long.

Not going to lie... picking up where they left has been hard. All of moms plants... The dogs.. Taking care of the backyard, where Michael usually would. Mom would definitely do too much at once. She’d be out in the yard planting something and pulling out something else in her damn UGG boots! wth mom?! Those are expensive! lol. “Oh its fine.. I’ll wash them.” Omg lol. Either that, or she’d be over here trying to move heavy a$$ pots by herself and I’d have to stop her before she hurt her back. Ayiyi.

Keanu and Aria’s birthdays without them... seeing my babies sad and missing their grandma, grandpa, and aunties has been hard. It will be out of nowhere sometimes... and all the nights of Aria waking up in the middle of the night crying. I feel you baby girl... I get it. I miss them too... Its okay to be sad... Mantras...

You were her little rays of sunshine. Grandpa and grandma loved you SOOOO much.

Mom would babysit the kids on Saturday mornings, while Kuya, Vaness, and I went to workout. They’d go get breakfast, pancakes and eggs, at UJs. She’d take them to Target, the dollar store, Walmart, etc. just so they could look and maybe get something to play with together. She always crafted with them.

Living in this house... especially with COVID... has been hard. I miss just sitting at the dinner table, eating sho mi, and talking about work. Mom and Michael getting all worked up over some crazy manager, or something going down with the union.. yup, that’s where I get it from... advocacy and leadership skills FTW. One thing they could always talk about for HOURS was work lol.

I remember when I was a little girl, Mom would let me play in the bathtub until I was all wrinkled. She would let me bring all my toys into the tub. At one point I even had a care bear doll that she, for some reason, let me take in the bath lol. She’d throw it in the dryer for me after I was done.

I remember going to the grocery store with mom and leaving with two full a$$ grocery carts because we had a full house at all times. I mean it was Kuya, my cousin Jojo, my brother Derric, my cousin John, Bubba, my cousin Jay, me and whoever else was over the house lol. When Kuya was in high school, it was all of his buddies partying at our house and crashing on the floor in the living room, dining room, and all the couches. She was the #1 host for sure.

“Are you hungry? Did you eat yet?”

Thats love.

All of Kuya’s high school friends called her Mom. My friends called her Mama Fern. She loved that.

I remember playing hide n go seek in the dark in our tiny town house.. Later in the bigger house on Glenbriar... where mom actually tripped and broke her arm... But she laughed so hard she peed her pants, so she was a good sport? lol. Needless to say, we sort of stopped playing after that.

I remember making dim sum with mom for the first time. Such a hot mess, flour and food everywhere, but so fun. We definitely didn’t do that again until there were more adults around to help lol. Mom knew how to run through a kitchen like a tornado. Hot mess! but the best cook.

Mom was always careful. She always wanted to make sure we were safe, that I was safe. I couldn’t go outside unless one of the boys was with me. When I would swim she would get nervous, even though I learned how to swim at a young age thanks to Kuya. One day, we were having a bbq, lots of family over, I was playing in the jacuzzi (drawing on the wall of the jacuzzi with a piece of chlorine... don’t play with chemicals kids lol) and she thought I was drowning? So she jumps her a$$ in there fully clothed and yanks my a$$ out. I was shocked as hell, so I naturally started crying hella hard and complaining about the fact that she scratched me when she yanked me up out of the water lol.

Keep in mind that that was not the first time one of the twins jumped into the pool fully clothed to “save” someone hahaha.

Speaking of fully clothed in the pool... The time auntie tripped and fell slo-mo style (that questionable, are you going to catch your balance, speed) into the pool LOL. Mom was dead laughing at her. Most hilarious video.

Those twins lol.

Jeeze.. speaking of the twins. They had this crazy connection. Tell me why when mom got sick with suspected viral meningitis and had to be hospitalized... Auntie straight up followed her right into the ICU with viral meningitis...

Who remembers their 50th birthday? Talk about doing it BIG. So much fun. All the performances. Lani was there... KMA performances and kuya and John getting down for Maglalatik. Who doesn’t like seeing some half naked, buff dudes, bang coconuts together? haha. The twins getting down with their hula performance. Cute!

I remember when Mom and pops were going through their divorce and she would text me after midnight. I was going to Sac State and of course I was team NO sleep at the time. I would be in the AIRC studying. I’d comfort as best as I could from a distance... and then come home on weekends to be there with her when I could.

She found her footing again. Started going to the gym with Kuya more... Started running all the time... all of her half marathons and finally she did the Nike Women’s Marathon.

Hiking Half Dome with her. What.a.badass.

That is really how I see her. She was so badass. When she was my age she had my 9 year old Kuya and I was on the way... She was working and supporting us and then eventually decided to make a better life for us, and went back to school... NURSING SCHOOL. wth. I can’t even imagine doing that right now, but reminding myself of where she has been and how much she PUT IN WORK... That keeps me grounded in the fact that we are responsible for our lives. If you want something, you have to work for it. You can’t just hope for better... you make better happen.

I guess its that reminder... her strength... her and Michael’s love and hard work... That keeps me going.

Being mindful... being thankful... acknowledging my own strength...

But with that said... August has been increasingly hard. I don’t like to think about my birthday. I don’t even want to plan anything. They’re not here... I can’t celebrate with all my loved ones and friends. Thank you COVID...

We’re just getting closer and closer to the anniversary? Nah.. lets not call it that... anniversary sounds like something nice... something to celebrate... This is NOT that. The day your loved ones are taken is not something to celebrate... I mean honestly, if I had to pinpoint the worst day of my life, that was it.... When I think about that day I can’t breathe. Terrible memories... so many sleepless nights. I’ve come so far. Its still hard, but I’ve come a long way.

Anyway... this post is sort of random and nostalgic. Things I hold onto. Things that make me happy cry... Things that weigh heavy on my heart.

Here’s my playlist for grief... reminders of them... collected over the last year:

Aloha for now -Kaleo Vai & Passion

One day at a time -Jennifer Chung

In the end - Gabe Bondoc, Melissa Polinar, Passion

Round and around -Kolohe Kai

Fade Away -Rebelution

Alive -The Green

New Day -Kimie’

Angels above me -Stick Figure

Memories -Maroon 5

Wish you pain -Andy Grammer

100 -Katchafire

Everyday life -Coldplay

Out of the darkness -Isla vista worship, Bre Reed

Amen -Andra Day

Grateful -13 Crowns feat. Poo Bear

Rainbow Connection -Gwen Stefani

Be okay -ZOE worship

With you -Eryn Allen Kane

Dont worry -Mesto feat. Aloe Blacc

Just livin’ -Sensi trails, Kbong

Remember me -Miguel, Natalia Lafourcade

Even more -Major

Let it be -Xav A.

Give Thanks -Iya terra, Stick figure

Mr. Sun -Sammy Johnson

Rest easy -Thrive, Nico of Tribal Theory

Sunny Days- Allen Stone

Today’s a new day -Common Kings

Mother’s Love -Jonah Jaxon, Micah G

The bones -Maren Morris, Hozier

Give you blue -Allen Stone

And we remain -Johnnyswim

Yellow -Kina Grannis

Streetcar -Daniel Caesar

Meant to be -Bebe Rexha, Florida georgia line

All you need to know -Gryffin, slander, Calle Lehmann

Like I’m gonna lose you -Jasmine Thompson

#ohanaovereverything #threeoh #grief #memories #family #loss

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theskyexists · 4 years

Text

she-ra 4

the reason i stopped watching she-ra is the same reason i stopped watching the dragon prince.

the narrative doesn’t take the situation seriously. instead of leaning into the anguish of war and violence (atla, teen titans) - they make light of it. EVEN when the characters’ guardians are KILLED!!

when Angella died and they spent 2 seconds on Glimmer’s grief at the end of season 3 i was like......actually fuck this. HOW can i take any of these stakes seriously when they insist on brushing them off???

anyway just had to complain about that - especially because the start of the first ep of 4 is them joking AGAIN about something as grim as Glimmer now carrying all the responsibilities of her mother - who may i remind you IS DEAD

but catradora became canon apparently so now i have to struggle through

her aunt, her mother’s sister, is fuckin, joking about cakes, her friends are laughing at the joke. COME ON! how goddamn unrealistic and insensitive. EVEN if they wanna make a point of it - it’s silly! because the narrative PARTICIPATES in making light of the situation. if it was just the characters it would be less jarring

‘we’ll make sure this day is perfect’ WHAT? how could it EVER BE IF HER MOTHER IS FUCKING DEAD????????? AND THAT”S THE ONLY REASON SHE’S QUEEN????? ‘must be hard’ YEAH IT’S HARD - IN FACT IMPOSSIBLE. instead of pretending to be happy maybe you can show some genuine sensitivity. these people are so crazily emotionally underdeveloped my god. what age are they supposed to be? 16? 17? The problem that She-ra has (just like the dragon prince) is that there are no relevant adults. Oh sure there’s a Queen, and some Soldiers, and a Sorceress. But there isn’t a single relevant competent adult around who is concerned with running a bureaucracy or the emotional stability of children

I do like how Catra has overcome her fear of Hordak. but i think i remember being fuckin furious at her for almost destroying the whole world and hurting Scorpia and betraying Entrapta just to spite Adora. vaguely.

the rebellions problem is that they’re all extremely stupid himbos. like literally, in the whole story, only catra and shadowweaver have any smarts, while glimmer gains the ability to think during full moons on wednesdays. meanwhile everybodys is a slave to their emotions - which destroys any brain cells that shadowweaver or catra (or angella or anyone) might have managed. they could literally have killed hordak the entire time but just let him order them around because they’re so hot for acknowledgement

I’m glad Glimmer reflects my frustrations now hahahahaah

‘everyone is already acting like she doesn’t matter’ - yeah dudes, you fucking insensitive bastards

‘im supposed to take care of you glimmer’ - but unfortunately i have the emotional intelligence of a crab! FUCK!

this is another thing about this show that makes me groan. sappy quick resolutions of emotional turmoil through re-affirming the fuckin power of friendship in the first episode of the season.

also couldn’t Adora have done this she-ra stuff from the very beginning

that was badass.....miss glimmer’s other hair though. ok the emotions at that hologram and statue though...

the coolest part of she-ra for me is finding out more how the ancient systems all fit into Etheria and the She-Ras and Hordak Prime etc.

THIS IS A GOOD SPEECH. love this badass.

love Hordak getting put in his place. Love Catra realising she has power - love Hordak reaping what he sows. its unfortunate that she’s a shitty brat who JUST can’t get over her inferiority complex

if i could endlessly teleport i would do what glimmer does

also, glimmer was willing to fuckin murder catra before and she DEFINITELY will be now lol. love that for her.

why did they only introduce adora learning to transform her sword NOW ahahaha, theyve had SO MANY SCENES in which she doesnt have it and then suddenly does - and then its gone again

scorpia is the funniest and most likeable person in the whole show

they really suddenly can’t take five people on with she ra and fuckin huntara on their side??

i remember that little sadistic righteous twist in my stomach when Adora finally was like: FUCK!!!!!! YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!! Catra!!!!!!! and the stupid idiot got it

FINALLY A GLANCE AT THE PEOPLE OF ETHERIA AGAIN! i love the party sequences in this!!! the people of etheria are so beautiful! nobody ever comments on the main characters all looking plain human in contrast....

‘and i fell for it!’ yeah cos you DUMB AS BRICKS ADORA

so first they quietly take out the guards....and then literally break open the door hahaahahahahaaha

‘we forgot the bots regenerate’ - yeah cos you DUMB AS BRICKS ADORA

i just dont understand why they insist on making the main characters so DUMB ahahahahaah

Adora and Catra are great at hitting where it hurts. the difference between them is that Catra KNOWS that she’s hurting Adora - she does it deliberately.

wow that could be some pretty angsty stuff constantly leaving her to struggle on the floor while painfully electrocuted. Catra has also moved to kill Adora straight up so many times. im sure she really wants to (but it would destroy her later). But now, Adora swept something at Catra that might have actually killed her. I get Catra though, I would’t want to get beaten by some blonde, blue-eyed, glowing golden kid who always gets to win and do better. this is truly the first time Adora has moved to kill Catra......

does flatterina not have parents who’d be like: uhhhhh maybe leave the soldiering for a couple more years?

catra truly burning all her bridges. hahaha. it’s so satisfying to see her use her anger and power to truly destroy herself - because of guilt!

no other villagers were like - HMMMMMMM this random new kid is here? weird..... i didnt see that coming either.

Adora doesn’t think about what Catra might have even been doing there - cos she’s DUMB AS BRICKS

the interesting thing about this show is that they’re setting up a dichotomy. they’re treating war like a high-stakes game because they have the good side adhere to an aesthetic of ....magic. they will not make the two sides equivalent in any way - which makes questions of morality moot. the show is purely an emotional drama. the horde is an army of brainwashed kids in an industrial wasteland - they fight with tech and guns. but the good guys cannot fight with an army or tech, they fight with cleverness and magic. they’re called the ‘rebellion’ - they HAVE to be underdogs because they have to follow the script of good - even though what’s really going on is war, not a rebellion. That’s why they have a single strike team that do ‘missions’. They are presented as FUNDAMENTALLY different - on the level of identity which they cannot change lest they destroy themselves - and in that way the good guys can never become the bad guys. it is ALMOST meta. think they’re gonna do something with that at one point. i hope

also Netossa has such a super cool design.

‘everyone knows you’re needed in bright moon’ - uh. really? i dont know. some random person i’ve never seen before demands you go to meetings. so? is that important? why?

spinerella can literally FLY???????? why has she been in the background this whole time??? hahahaha military inefficiency.

there was an explosion that ripped trees apart - but bo’s alive!! honesty why didn’t they try explosive suicide bots before. they’re very lucky he was still alive to heal

‘could they be tracking she-ra?’ WHAT? isn’t the obvious suggestion - A SPY???? they just assume that the general is right hahahahaa.

i love how double trouble is so meta.

actually, why wasn’t glimmer trained as a sorcerer anyway?

glimmer is upset about her growing magic plants but not her having magic ingredients

why do they present good strategic thinking (for once) as evil influence from shadowweaver

what a fuckin badass. honestly - glad that this show finally utilised glimmer’s extremely op powers like they should be. honestly, she’s much more powerful than She-Ra.

that bit with spinerella was so contrived jfc.

‘by using me as a decoy’ adora says, pissed off. uhhhh YOU went off on your own to get smushed by fuckin bots adora. Glimmer didn’t do that to you. she just used your stupidity.

glimmer really left catra to die. hahahahaa

i like adora best when she’s on her own and being a dork

they definitely managed to foreshadow that Light Hope was evil but im glad they picked up the thread now

am i seeing this wrong or did scorpia have two mums??? but also. where the fuck are they

lolololololol because everybodys dumb as bricks and emotionally volatile they’re incredibly easy to manipulate

‘i cant risk hitting flatterina’ pffft - ALL YOUR ARROWS ARE NON-LETHAL BO. ugh i cant deal with these contrived stakes

I LOVE THIS BADASS EFFICIENT HARDCORE GLIMMER

they’re really gonna spin it like this is a bad development? fuck off. finally some grit.

‘you took things way too far’ - but she got results! dumb as bricks adora

(this may seem harsh but adora is DUMB shes so fucking DUMB!!!! and she has many good qualities (such as an almost innate sense of morality) but goddamn. i guess its good to sometimes have a show about all around dumb characters. i mean, it’s not unrealistic per se, it’s just.....weird.)

the interesting thing about these characters is that you can SEE every single one of them struggling with cognitive dissonance. thats the big story of this show. they see the world a certain way - and then when something challenges that, they fight to the death to destroy or deny or ignore that new information - to everybody’s detriment. and they can’t back down because every step they’ve taken - would turn to sins they can’t live with. it’s interesting and its also a kind of conflict that‘s frustrating if not resolved at SOME point. thats why i love this season for its characters going off the rails. adora aiming to kill catra, catra destroying her last relationships, glimmer growing more and more militant.

they’re all acting like teens - that is - highly volatile - unable to keep from provoking others or be provoked - but they ARE teens.

‘catra doesn’t care. she’ll hurt people to get her way (implied: EVEN people on her side)’ - we must remember that Scorpia was entirely fine with KILLING the trio (it was Catra that wasn’t at the time).

‘you’re a bad friend’ OH OUCH. Catra - who’s always been treated as a whipping girl by those in power - does the same to those she is in power over. But on some level she doesn’t WANT to be that. she’s just always always been rejected and take advantage of and lashed out at and abandoned by the people she considered important (shadowweaver ---- doing the same to catra that was done to her is so goddamn....it’s the story of this show. the simplicity and banality of damaging and hurting others and that carrying over to harm even more people - is the story of this show and it’s immeasurably frustrating and REALISTIC)

she still flinches at Hordak’s lashing out. but she imprints on him the exact lesson she’s trying to school herself in. If you don’t need anybody - you don’t want anyone - if nobody matters but the mission and winning - then you can’t be hurt. she wants to prove her worth - but she doesn’t realise that inherently means that she’s putting somebody in power over her - again and again and again.

mermista coming in clutch with the braincells: there’s a spy! I love how this is played as completely implausible and just Mermista nonsense (who i love learning about) - while it’s so obviously true/

i actually love Adora when she’s being serious and heroic, or a huge dork. and she has the wit to RECOGNISE good ideas. but i just don’t understand why Adora is being big b about being used as a distraction. like....why?

i love that the underside of Mermista’s sneaker has a figure. but why the fuck is a common soldier with them (flatterina) and do they really think they can interrogate the whole castle filled with some shitty guards and...what - the guerilla troops they sometimes employ? where do they even live? ah in a tent city. ok

why is the GENERAL in front line combat WITHOUT SOLDIERS???? oh wait. glimmer did that too when she was general. lolololol

i understand why Adora doesn’t trust Shadowweaver and doesn’t want her around most of all - and Glimmer getting buddy buddy with her is hurtful. but...it’s not helpful to needle glimmer about it. but dismissing the guards around shadowweaver however? stupid of Glimmer. unnecessary. ‘what has she done but help us?’ - uhhhh she kidnapped you, corrupted your powers, almost wiped Adora’s mind. I wish Adora had summed up those things instead of leaving them implied.

so perfuma and mermista come across inconsistencies in the stories - but then. forget about it? i just...... UGGHGHGHGHGHGHGH. people really aren’t this dumb are they? they’re just NOT.

‘no more secrets and doing things without us’ - that was a good speech. but like, glimmer is right - she’s surrounded by INCOMPETENT IDIOTS lolololol. but good leadership is corralling idiots, Glimmer. not going off on your own. but she’s already planted the bait about the dining room.

‘we were the only ones who knew about the plan to take back dril’ ---- THEN WHY DID YOU INTERROGATE OTHER PEOPLE AHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHA

‘stop questioning my choices, stop whining about being a decoy’ YEAH FUCKIN HELL ADORA STOP BEING SUCH A FUCKING SHIT. IS THIS REALLY ‘TAKING CARE OF GLIMMER’????

‘all you do is question my authority, it’s exhausting.’ yeah god...it really is. adora needs to fucking BACK! OFF! but im loving these fights because it brings out the grievances. Adora is right to be worried about Glimmer no longer including her in her decisions. and she makes a good point that that’s bad. She makes a good point that Shadowweaver cannot be trusted. And Glimmer makes zero good points - except that it’s been hard for her and has garnered 0.1% understanding from the people around her. Oh they were working together. BUT those were definitely real grievances.

GLIMMER CAN ALREADY DO A CONTAINMENT SPELL LIKE THAT??? godDAMN. castapella completely flunked her responsibilities to Glimmer but shadowweaver did NOT.

hmmm so Solinius was....destroyed. but like, did the people die? like....the people? that’s the important bit isn’t it? i mean, they were under the sea right?

i suppose the problem i also have is that this show will NOT hurry up. normally i love filler stuff but ...the characters are too.....cheery. too flat. their quirks are fun and funny until they’re literally character flaws.

are the horde just literally attacking civilians? jezus. the war crimes. how did shadowweaver ever expect to trick Adora when she was released into the field?

‘you can’t just keep going off on your own!’ - SHE LITERALLY SAVED THE WHOLE FUCKING TOWN. SHE’S THE QUEEN! EVERYBODY SHOULD LISTEN TO HER! lolololol

the problem with Adora’s points is that everything about their dynamics are always so nebulous. why cant glimmer keep showing up to help out? WHY??? she’s the most capable fucking soldier in the field! she’s supposed to have full fucking authority! like, Adora isn’t in the right here. the problem is that her needling is only a symptom of her worries - which is that Glimmer doesn’t trust her any more. but the needling does NOTHING but make her seem like an idiot

i do love this trope reversal here - Seahawk deliberately damselling them to let the princesses save the boys? pffft

love catra getting the consequences for her actions regarding Scorpia. You can’t keep lashing out at people and expect them to stay my dear cat.....

oooohhh Glimmer.... you’re treading close to very hurtful territory. Blaming Adora for the Rebellion failing? for things she couldn’t do anything about? stupid.

really?? you’re really gonna fucking fight-resolution BLOCK ME? are you FUCKING kidding me? edging me for the whole GODDAMN SEASON??? and finally Adora cries at Glimmer going over the line???? fuckin I HATE the narrative decisions in this stupid show I FUCKING HATE THEM FUCK THESE WRITERS GOD FUKCING DAMMIT!!! this has been the whole GODDAMN SHOW!!!!!! ARGHGHGHGHGHGH

i’ve been waiting for a fucking resolution for Adora and Catra the whole! goddamn! SHOW! NOTHING! else matters! you do the exact same for glimmer and adora and now you let it fester again??? because of some no-stakes BULLSHIT? just give me the fucking godddamn PAYOFF for watching these kids be IDIOTS.

this fight on the boat is COOL and really wonderfully animated

really? Glimmer’s response to Adora being hurt and not wanting to be TOUCHED is to be angry herself? what a fucking IDIOT. god i can’t stand this. I CAN’T STAND IT

is this how people act? do they never take a moment to breathe and think and reflect and realise their priorities and take a step back and fucking apologise?

jezus FUCKING! CHRIST!

‘no matter what glimmer thinks of me’ oh that HURTED. oh damn. that’s so relatable. it’s a way to run, it’s a way to internalise the hurt and then prove the things that hurt wrong. the one that hurt you

I know Bo is supposed to be the emotionally intelligent one but he’s also too soft. He should go up to his friends individually and ask them the sharp questions. not - ‘communicate more positively’.

I just like Adora so much better when she’s alone. Her friendships’ positive moments are always so sappy or so....like over-exaggerated, the negative moments always so fucking annoying. Alone, Adora is generally driven, tragic, and cool. the problem is perhaps that i don’t care for the constant fucking drama

god i LOVE Mara so much - she’s so beautiful. and i LOVE learning more about the Old Ones. So they were trying to study Ehteria’s magic.... but then Bright Moon and the princesses were already here. The Magic-Like systems of the Old Ones are pure tech.

wow! even Mara’s transformation is way cooler.

so why was the first one’s tech (she ra) responsive to the magic? why does Raz know about She-Ra? when she ra is first ones tech????

WAIT ONE SECOND. She-Ra is ‘magic’ ??? it’s the SWORD that’s the first one’s tech! She-Ra is Etheria’s magic ! but how if the First Ones chose Mara. Did they steal She-Ra from Etheria?

so what im getting is that. the Old Ones colonised Etheria. Etheria has magic, and when Mara was chosen they made that girl an elite soldier - giving her a first one’s tech sword so she could ‘control’ Etheria’s magic. Then Mara was told to study the magic of Etheria - the ship implying that she’d not been on the planet before. then they created a Heart of Etheria project - which will probably turn the magic into a weapon. this was going to be used against Hordak Prime, im sure. I mean, Mara saved Etheria, but she did doom the rest of the universe to...extinction.... like, judging from Hordak’s strategy, Hordak Prime just literally exterminates planets and repopulates them with his clones....

But why would the planet choose a girl from amongst the colonisers - twice?

OOOHHH that anguished scream. i love anguished screams

why dont they put fucking safety belts in these ships. it’s not like the ship didn’t survive. only Mara got splatted (i guess)

also i love Mara. but damn Adora just got some more shit on her plate. why the fuck was she pushed through a portal again? for a She-Ra chain reaction?

I love madame Raz.

So they didn’t explicitly use it against Hordak Prime. and it wouldn’t have destroyed Etheria back then but it will now...

guh this showmakes it so hard to enjoy catra’s pain.

well they did finally have a good talk about it. I have to say, Glimmer is making good strategic sense - it’s just that this show only rewards harebrained schemes

Catra having a crazy panic attack cos she can’t find Scorpia and she’s completely lost and she knows its her fault. kinda love that for her. my heart

my dear Glimmer, theres a difference between absence of trust and absence of agreement.

they’re bringing king micah back just when angella is dead? oh fuckin lol

the horde....exiled micah? they exiled Micah instead of killing him???

why do they ALWAYS interrupt important conversations? i hate that shit. it’s cheap. it’s unsatisfying.

now THIS is what im here for - that unstoppable WILL!! john gonzalez is right - we watch stories for characters overcomign obstacles. writing, is creating the obstacle course. .....what does that say about me and my life....hmmm.

‘light hope told me everything i need to know’ - uhhh no she didn’t. she didn’t tell you how to harness the energy at all. ugh

how the fuck did double trouble escape. seems to me that they didn’t actually. they were let go....

it’s always so stupid when people try to tell other people: oh no you’ve got no plan - this is too risky! when that’s NEVER a problem

Glimmer is going to activate the weapon just in time for Hordak Prime to use it. And naturally she misses the return of her dad. fuck this

they’re gonna have Hordak and Catra fight? hmm

Double Trouble is right - this IS good for her - and it IS Catra - except for Shadowweaver’s case - she was an abusive bitch

I love Scorpia’s new cool fight music and also glowy eyes

is glimmer going to throw herself into lava??

the unfortunate thing is that Hordak Prime is right on the doorstep and he took over the whole universe or whatever. so they could probably have used that weapon. i mean the Old Ones must have seen something coming. there must be a reason they’re all GONE maybe????

why did Adora assume that all those stars would be destroyed?

THE ANIMATION ON THAT FINAL STUFF WAS INCREDIBLE AND EPIC

how the fukc are they going to beat Horde Prime lolololol.

i guess Glimmer really shouldn’t have done that. but at least she was in time to bond with Catra.

#my stuff #vidi #she ra

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comicteaparty · 4 years

Text

June 20th-June 26th, 2020 Creator Babble Archive

The archive for the Creator Babble chat that occurred from June 20th, 2020 to June 26th, 2020. The chat focused on the following question:

What is something you’re just not very good at right now writing and/or drawing in general?

Deo101 [Millennium]

mysteries. 100% I can not write mysteries!

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

ears

Deo101 [Millennium]

the connection between legs and torso. No not hips, I can draw hips fine, but like the movement aspect of it

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

Action scenes. Orchestrating fights or big motions on the page... it doesn’t come naturally to me! I have to look at a lot of reference to see how other artists do it. Impact shapes, speed lines, anything to convey movement...

But I am slowly building a vocabulary of... fight shapes? I’m calling them fight shapes, haha

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I feel that

Your feeling I feel deeply

"visual library" is a term that comes to mind

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Composition. I just talked about this earlier today, but.... yup. Composition is my bane.

Mitzi (Trophallaxis)

I'd like to get better at writing in general. I have a lot of trouble verbalizing things I see in my head, and so I gotta rely on images and thumbnails to get any idea across, sometimes. otherwise im a windbag and use 5000 words to say 0-1 things, lmao

carcarchu

I have trouble writing simply. I always want to embellish, add extra details, more characters and make everything more complicated and i worry it ends up making things unnecessarily convoluted

Drawing-wise i hate drawing hands

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

The legit thing I am worse at writing is fucking

Deo101 [Millennium]

omg

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

essays to convince people to hire me

Deo101 [Millennium]

OH OKAY

WAY TO CUT IT OFF

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

YEAH

Mitzi (Trophallaxis)

carcarchu

let her finish deo

Mitzi (Trophallaxis)

comedic timing at its finest

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

omg

I was very confused for a sec(edited)

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

but seriously like speaking of filling gaps this is what I'm legit struggling most with right now so any help much appreciated

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

raises hand

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I need to write a personal statement and every time I sit down to edit I want to die

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I volunteer as tribute

writing is basically the only thing I'm really good at

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

It's not the writing I hate

It's the writing about me

carcarchu

is that the thing where you have to write in 3rd person? like those blurb things on people's websites?(edited)

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

It just feel so gross whoring out my deeply held passions and struggles for a spot in med school

No I'm talking about college essays lmao sorry for derailing

The blurb things are an interesting topic though!

Have you guys writtent those before and does anyone actually like writing them?

carcarchu

i had to write a blurb about myself for my university's website and yeah it was uncomfy

lemme see if i can find it

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I HATE writing those

because I just start like, "Crona J. is an artist and writer from Chicago......." And I have no idea how to continue

Deo101 [Millennium]

god yeah even just writing a profile or about me is hard enough!!!

I'm always like "deo - 22 - she/her - illustrator - webcomic author - student" and then i leave it

thats it thats all you get

depending on the platform i MIGHT put bi - disabled and thats it!!!!

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

yeah

half of the stuff I write doesn't even feel relevant to the audience either

who cares that I have been drawing since I was 12 lol?

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Mate I don't even write those. My bio is like "UCSD" "Read my comic"

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

hahaha

Deo101 [Millennium]

I also always feel like when I see "ive been drawing since I was 5!" I kinda think like... well everyone has been -_- like this doesnt tell me anything, how long have you been an aspiring pro, how long have you been studying art...? that tells me more

so I never put that kind of stuff in my biod either

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

yeah, and also, I didn't go to prestigious school, so I don't even include my college

and I only have one comic project so far, just under a chapter

so what do I write?

Not that important an issue, but irksome nonetheless

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I don't include my school because it's prestigious, I include it because it's not an art college

Deo101 [Millennium]

owch

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I want fellow stem-y yet artsy people from my school to recognize me as one of them(edited)

DEO stop interupptung me at the worst points!!

Deo101 [Millennium]

i love jumping to conclusions. so no.

Erin Ptah (BICP | Leif & Thorn)

If it's a bio where I can talk about the comics, I try to spotlight a few tropes/genres that'll catch the eye of potential readers. Not a full-fledged summary, just a quick hit of If You Like These Words, You'll Probably Like Reading It. ("Fantasy, comedy, shapeshifters, PTSD, time travel, cats")

Erin Ptah (BICP | Leif & Thorn)

And if it's gonna be personal, same deal with bits of personal info -- not trying to be a Comprehensive Biography, just pulling a few details that are relatable connection points

The problem with "I've always wanted to be a writer/artist/cartoonist" isn't just how generic it is, the problem is also the vibe of "here's my thing, your role in this is to support me"

Whereas if you say something like "I like drawing cute girls and writing fantasy," the response can be "oh hey, I like seeing cute girls and reading fantasy, tell me more!"

Or if you go with "Sailor Moon fan, will put extra cheese on everything," people can go "cool, that's relatable, we can like Sailor Moon and cheese together." It gets at your shared investment in a fun thing, it's not about expecting them to be personally invested in you

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

I think perhaps the most fundamental thing is "you can't please everyone." I've never liked the 'random food related weird tidbit tacked on' thing because it feels too try-hardish to me, but I understand for other people, it's not a matter of trying too hard and is genuinely how they just talk.

Erin Ptah (BICP | Leif & Thorn)

Oh definitely, you hold out for a bio that connects with everyone and you'll never get it done

AntiBunny

Personally I'm not great at drawing cars. It's why all my cars early on in the comic were side view only, and old blocky looking things. It was all I could do. I've been getting better by using references.

Every so often I buy a little hotweels or matchbox car when I'm buying groceries. I aim for realistic ones based on real vehicles, especially utility vehicles like ice cream trucks, ambulances, fire trucks, and whatnot you'd see every day in a city. I keep a little box of them on my desk, so if the scene calls for a car to be visible, I have a reference that can help me get all the curves and angles right.

Sure beats drawing from memory, but also practice time in the sketchbook with them is a necessity.

Now crowd scenes are beginning to be my bane. Not because they're hard to draw, just because they're time consuming.

Suddenly I realize why old episodes of Sailor Moon has cities with people free sidewalks and empty streets.

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

That's a great idea, gathering the model cars! I should do that for a future comic.

kayotics

I also struggle with cars so, uh, my comic takes place in fantasy 1700-1800s

But also horses are bad too

Cars and horses! They suck

Deo101 [Millennium]

do what I did and make up an easier animal to draw than a horse ;)

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Vehicles in general. Should just put everyone on roller blades and be done with it

Deo101 [Millennium]

I'd lov that tbh

kayotics

I’ve considered making something other than horses......

Deo101 [Millennium]

I highly encourage it, the people love it and also so does my brain

kayotics

Or else lean into them being ugly

Deo101 [Millennium]

heres the trick about horses though they look really weird and as small as you make their legs, when you think "this is way too thin..." youre wrong and their ankles are probably smaller than that

kayotics

The thing that gets me is their faces

Deo101 [Millennium]

... mask

kayotics

Hahaha

I should just make deer the normal mode of transport

Deo101 [Millennium]

that would be really cute tbh

kayotics

I love deer and they’re cute

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Just exaggerate them to the point where it looks like a style choice

Your people already have unrealistic proportions

Why not the horses too

kayotics

That’s how I draw buildings tbh because I hate buildings

Deo101 [Millennium]

I also gave horses dog mouths, maybe do something like that? someone can be like "horses dont look like that?" and as long as youre consistent you can say "they do in this world!!!"

kayotics

Oh god no that’s like a devil creature

Deo101 [Millennium]

yeah they look horrible but its fun

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I legit remember saying that to you deo lmao

Deo101 [Millennium]

ive had dog horse for years you didnt give me this

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Not the they look horrible part

kayotics

I’ve already got beasts, I don’t need horses to look WORSE than they did

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Bwah I remember

Time to archive dig(edited)

Deo101 [Millennium]

I love dog horse

kayotics

Honestly it’s good but they scare me

Deo101 [Millennium]

yeah... maybe instead give them cat mouths

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

https://discordapp.com/channels/472908933045026827/634081658018070549/688589449562423422

wait omg this is the message that led to your first dm to me lmao

Deo101 [Millennium]

is it??? omg i think it is... historical moment

dog horse brings us together

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Another point to convince kay to draw uncanny animals!

Deo101 [Millennium]

what I do to make birds fun to draw is making them sparkly

maybe try that

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

god you're gonna ruin kay's carefully crafted aesthetic

is this your competitiveness showing its face again(edited)

Deo101 [Millennium]

they can make it work! why do you doubt their abilities

make this the main mode of transport

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

ah is that how it works in that case i have 10 shitty indie game ideas

make them pls

Deo101 [Millennium]

implying my ideas are shitty??? rude!

kayotics

I have an aesthetic?

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Or if you want to be very efficient, everyone in universe can teleport

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

lmao you have an excellent aesthetic

crona

i do that already

kayotics

Crona.... that’s my comic already!! Haha

Deo101 [Millennium]

kay does also have teleporting to be clear

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

don't underestimate my laziness!

Deo101 [Millennium]

LMAO

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

See

It must be great advice

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

oh crap you're right kay also does have teleporting

and unrealistic beasts, to be fair

kayotics

Sometimes on the same page

That’s the eyes I draw on the beasts

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Or be even lazier, and make it so that horses and beasts either don't exist or haven't been domesticated in that region. Everyone walks. Their feet hurt, but their calves are glorious.

Deo101 [Millennium]

you get it

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

wait crona and deo also have comics where teleportation could exist

will you join us?

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

lol, yup

Deo101 [Millennium]

nope

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

(nah, I've already drawn horses. They're not so bad if you stare at photos)

sierrabravo (Hans Vogel is Dead)

drawing horses is fun!!

[multiple people are typing]

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

And there will also be hella walking, because the leg game must be strong, otherwise I'm not doing my job

Deo101 [Millennium]

ive decided that millennium is like really in the future but things like time travel, teleportation, warp speed... nope! You can go really fast in a spaceship but like nothin crazy

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

man these planets real close together then

or maybe people just live a really long time ...?

Deo101 [Millennium]

I just do my version of teleporting which is "wow it'll take a week to get there" and then its a week later

dont worry about it

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

nice

Deo101 [Millennium]

its not realistic, but its consistent

🌈ERROR404 🌈

ahhhh horses are really nice to draw imo, if i can get it right lol

Deo101 [Millennium]

I like drawing horses a lot I just never do it tbh

🌈ERROR404 🌈

something needs to fuel my addiction to cowboy culture

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Consistency is key tbh

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I just do my version of teleporting which is "wow it'll take a week to get there" and then its a week later

when my whole comic takes place in like a week lmao

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

if you decide that gravity doesn't exist in your world, as log as you're consistent with it, you're golden

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

in the unlikely event i get tired of drawing my comic i can adopt deo's strat "wow it'll take a week to get to the ending"

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

My comic takes place in about a year (not counting flashbacks which span... uh... a very long time)

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

"man sure seems like this conflict will take approximately a week to be resolved" "one week later"

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

hahaha

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

"sure did get resolved"

the end

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

convenient

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

i wonder if anyone's done that

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

One Korean series I followed for years did it

and everyone was pissed, as you can imagine

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

lol

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

better than cancellation?

Deo101 [Millennium]

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

what a way to go

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

I'd honestly have preferred cancellation/ abandonment

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Just have a fan finish it for you at that rate lmao

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

OH that's a good discussion topic. If you got tired of your comic, or life got in the the way of you working on it anymore, how would you end it as quickly as possible?

Deo101 [Millennium]

maybe rephrase that a little

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I would toss it at my little sis, and she would do it for me, no joke

Deo101 [Millennium]

My little sister also would probably take over it for me

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

let's move to general?

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

eyyy!

Deo101 [Millennium]

but also I could just be like "They got an email that john died of old age its over now"

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

MVP sisters!

lol

an email

what a way to end it

eliushi [Keyspace]

For me it’s panels. Past me thought that the four panel structure would make things easy. Nope. It’s limiting how I want to tell the story so... I’m trying to branch out now and looking for other inspirations for panel and layout

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Just change the shape of your panels. It forces you to be creative.

eliushi [Keyspace]

True true! I have those in upcoming updates

But my heart swoons for the page spreads

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

oh yes

They are so gorgeous, but difficult to plan

eliushi [Keyspace]

Initially I was planning on storyboards but now I’m more comfortable with comics I think I’ll be aiming for traditional layouts

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yeah, storyboards are an entirely different beast

Desnik

I'm currently working on clearly portraying character motivation

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I think for me I don't draw animals often and rip have to draw a few for the upcoming pages so I'm just doing my best at this point lol

AntiBunny

Panel arrangement is the heart of comics as an art form. It takes practice, and study to learn how the eye flows from one thing to the next.

And once you have a thorough understanding of the rules you can learn how to carefully break them to produce something truly eye catching.

If I had to say the simplest rule to understanding flow is, if you need arrows to tell you which direction to read, then you're doing something wrong.

DanitheCarutor

This is candy for my self-deprecating mentality. Lol Honestly though. I'm not the best at writing in general, I don't like doing it physically, avoiding it at all cost (outside of dialogue and poorly done bullet points on scrap paper.) so I don't really know if/think I'm particularly good at it. I remember the last time I tried to physically write something was back in high school, I still have it saved on my computer, but it was something else. Too many dialogue scenes and overly detailed descriptions of things and characters. I only made it a little ways before giving up with "You know, this will be easier to just show than describe.". Story and character wise for my current comic, I'm not sure how well it's turning out or how good it will be in the end, my brain defaults my work to mediocre so I tend to be totally blind to what I'm doing right. I know my characters aren't the best for sure since they're all fleshy flaw bags with too many flaws, and I know I could have presented certain scene changes and such better, but that's all I can think of objectively. The art portion is something I at least know I can execute decently, but my color composition is the worst. I'm aware that I need to improve it, and I know what needs to be done, but it's something I can't really accomplish with my comic since I just want to focus on finishing pages. I'll have to make time to draw up some throw-away illustrations to experiment with, which I hope to have a little bit of now that I'm not on a regular update schedule. Also I can't draw vehicles and architecture for the life of me, I've referenced and studied but I still can't wrap my head around it. ALSO extreme angles and perspectives are still things I need work on, like 4-point circular perspective, ground level shots and over the head shots.

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

There's a lot of things I want to improve, but something I haven't seen mentioned yet: I would like to get better at deciphering feedback, how to glean useful things from multiple conflicting feedback.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Ooh that's a good one keii

I haven't really had to deal with that before though because all the negative feedback I've gotten is pretty consistent

Can I ask what the conflicting feedback you got is?

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Oh gosh, I legit spent a long, long moment trying to figure out where to even start

eliushi [Keyspace]

I really like this approach to feedback

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Yo Eli this is so good

eliushi [Keyspace]

Mary robinette is goals

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

this is spectacular already

wow

eliushi [Keyspace]

Pretty sure a wiser writer passed this onto me I have since used it a lot and it works for me

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

This is so so good Perfectly said about crits in creative fields

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

One example I can think of isn't actually something that was criticized, but showed up a lot in various ways: "this is (supposed to be) an exciting adventure romp centering Danbi" vs "this is an emotional journey story centering Ethan" ... Not a criticism, but two very conflicting interpretations. People who have one interpretation are shocked and confused when I tell them about the other one.

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Holy crap, Eli... This is one for the folder of absolute knowledge

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

woah, excellent advice

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

And yeah, that is a really good one. Symptoms are extremely useful, and diagnoses tend to be more useful in a conversation rather than a one-way "here is my diagnosis" thing

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I haven't heard it said before but the explaining eliminating a clean reaction rings so true to me

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Ahhh, this is literally the one document I have needed my entire life

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

also the helping someone tell the story they want

also the stream of consiousness, MAn

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I think I'll save that for my future high schoolers lol

some of the stuff said there is what I've noticed in the last few years critquing in academic settings but its nice to kno!

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

People have given me stream of consciousness reactions before and they were the most helpful. Almost all the changes in the story from others' reactions were from stream of consciousness reactions, not intentional critiques

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Yeah, one of the most helpful "critique" I ever got was also completely unintentional

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

One of the most useful tips in this guide for me in particular is the "As a writer don't:" section. I struggle with it a lot.

On the note of things we are bad at in the comic-making process, I am very bad at taking critiques!(edited)

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

tbh for a long time, my biggest struggling point that's not in the "as a writer don't:" is "don't throw yourself into the void of self-hate." I'm better now, but boy, when it was bad, it was bad.

But perhaps that kinda thing better fits into "as a person don't:"

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I am pretty good at taking critiques, but pretty bad at giving critiques! Right now the point I'm at is I'm just gonna not give critiques until I'm more mature

But then after I decided that an amateur writer friend told me his story idea that I not only disliked but was sort of offended by

and I really wanted to tell him but I didn't know how to do it nicely...

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

ooof

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

oh no

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

yeah, that's really tough

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

rip I tend to do kinda a sandwich method. I had to say some rough things few days ago on a practice pitch run and I pretty much said

Deo101 [Millennium]

Uh oh

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

"Your idea is developing for sure, but I think you need to reconsider some of the world building choices you done. Have you thought of researching such and such."

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

That's basically what I said

But I think I had to say "research ffs" in increasing intensity like 3 times lol

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Oh, nice, the "let's give them compliments too so that they know I'm not just being mean" method

It's a good method tbh

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

Rip it's not that like

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Deo might have something to say about this but it was about schizophrenics in a mental institution being portrayed in a real weird way by someone who didn't know anything about it(edited)

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Ooof

Deo101 [Millennium]

Ah man

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

ewww

Deo101 [Millennium]

I'll always stand by "asking people who've lived what you're writing about is the best form of research and can't be replaced"

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

Yeah I would said the to the person consider researching more on the topic and interview folks who have schizophrenia

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Dude I brought you up lmao

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

and also like "is there a reason you want to depict it this way?"

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

oooh

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah I know I'm agreeing idk... Idk what else I'd have to say on the topic

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

That's a very good question to ask someone

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

and depending on their responses, I would just put my two scents in there that rip

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah I always ask "what are your goals?" Before I ask anything else

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

critiques are kinda my strong point sinc eLMAO I do em all the time in my class

and teaching so yeah LOL

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Deo I mean I brought you up to this guy like saying "my friend messaged people online and they were super willing to talk to her you could do that"

Deo101 [Millennium]

OHHHHH gotcha

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I try my best to figure out what they want out of it and just deliever with some handful of suggestions

but I won't sugarcoat it unless you're a high school student or younger lmao

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah I'm often told I'm a lil too harsh but like idk

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I wouldn't say sugar coating it per say... More just telling them what their strengths are too, so that they have an idea of where they're at

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

telling someone their strengths is just as useful as telling them their flaws

that way they can highlight them

like just because you story has no flaws doesn't mean it's good right?

gotta have stuff that stands out in a good way as well

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Someone once phrased it as "Let's list everything that's wrong here, and find out how we can fix them" vs "How do we take this to the next level?" and that really resonated with me. It's not about sugarcoating; it's more about helping them get to the next level in the direction they wanna go.

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

THIS

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah I try to point out things that are going well, and I usually try to only point at things that ppl can work on immediately

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I should phrase my statement more clearly. But yeah Kei that's what I usually look for when critiquing

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

There's often no need to tell them "your writing is only at level 3, and that's bad because the max level is 99." Just tell them how to get to level 4.

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I dont' see it like its something bad but something that is challenging to them at the time

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Unless they have extremely unrealistic expectations or whatever that are standing in their own way

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

just have to figure out how to get out of the hump

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

Yep. I see this phenomenon in animation a lot. A good animation director will help you boost your existing work to something stronger, but still yours. A bad one will tell you to do it their way, and chide you for doing it ‘wrong.’

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

rip I know a person like that and lmao

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yessssss

That's why I always ask "what are your goals" to start

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yup

🌈ERROR404 🌈

I totally agree!!!! A LOT of the most important bits of great criticism is understanding exactly where the original creator was intending to go, and formatting your statements around helping them achieve that!!!!!!!

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Critiques are impossible if you don't know what the person is trying to achieve

🌈ERROR404 🌈

Just stating things that you would change if you were making it may seem useful and relevant to you the critic, but unless the creator is headed the exact same direction as you, they have just as much reason to invalidate the entire statement as they do to nit pick out the things they care to agree with

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Sometimes a prospective critic is simply too far removed from the target audience of the work, like on a fundamental level, and it makes it impossible to give them useful feedback. I think it's important to acknowledge that this can happen. It happens to me a lot and I just decline to give crits when it does.

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yeah, like don't ask me to critique a comic about sports lmao

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I agree on that notion, esepcially when seeing professional aritsts giving crits to folks starting out but it doesn't go as er ideal as they thought it would be

Deo101 [Millennium]

That's why I usually only seek out criticsm (for more than just general direction/advice) from people who's work I like

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I remember reading advice on getting beta readers, and it’s really REALLY important that they’re excited for your stuff. They want to make it better. They care. They can give critique, but they absolutely must be jazzed about your subject matter in some way, or else it’ll be a slog for everyone.

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

for me, I have my peers who I contact daily and we give each other advice, tips

despite having er difference interests in fields, but we experienced a lot in our program lol

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yes... (Speaking of if anyone wanted to beta read my next comic uhhhh let me know id love to have u)

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

very good point claire

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

100 percent agree Get people who are excited and know your vision

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah I have a small group of writer friends who know all my goals and a lot of my stuff? So they make a very good little critique circle, and we all help eachother

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I'm always ready to beta read if it's a concept I enjoy

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

like people who critique comics they hate. I'm like, damn, tough work but also ?? why

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

(Be careful about people who are excited about what they think is your vision.............)

Deo101 [Millennium]

Fish is this a callout for me

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

slightly?

Deo101 [Millennium]

Ahsjfkdjdkskdjdjdj

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

Keii I experienced the oppisisite like rip

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

it's just mystifying to me, I don't think it's wrong or anything

Deo101 [Millennium]

Also crona I'll send u when I'm at my comp

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

sure

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

What do you mean Tuyetnhi?

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Ohh that would be oof to deal with Kei

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I had to let a person down to reality bc I know they're excited about their idea but uhhhh

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

(Is it the fish romance?)

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

it wasn't engaging to me

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yes that one qjdjfkskdkk

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

nor my illustration friends

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I don’t have beta readers but I think that’s how it all goes lol

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

and we were like

"AAAAAAA"

Deo101 [Millennium]

Oh that's awkward

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Ooooooohhhhhhh... oof

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I have a couple friends I send pages to sometimes but they're always really positive about it

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

It was a rough critique

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Having creative friend circles is so essential for growth and screaming at eachothers works for motivation too

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yessss

Also just the ability to talk about your process without having to explain yourself

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

agreed lol

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I occasionally tap my fiance's shoulder and shove my sketches in his face with zero context, just to make sure he can figure out what's going on without me explaining. Super helpful

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I feel like I have a couple friends where, when I read their stuff, I know things that would amp their work up tenfold. But until they ask me... I’m screaming inside lol

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

lol

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

my friend always makes me feel like i'm a better writer than i am because she thinks so much like me she gets everything i write perfectly lol. But then I post and the comments are like "wtf i'm confused"(edited)

eliushi [Keyspace]

Yeah feedback is most effective when both sides are open and invested

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Claire Senpai Wants To Help

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

also same crona(edited)

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

It’s not bad, I just go I THINK I CAN HELP YOU MAKE IT AWESOMER AHHHHHH

eliushi [Keyspace]

Claire senpaiiii

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

But until then I remain still and supportive

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

why don't you ask them "can i suggest things?"

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah I try and keep my mouth shut

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

or "do you want suggestions?"

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

lol

eliushi [Keyspace]

I usually say what I like about it first and then. Are you looking for feedback?

Deo101 [Millennium]

Tbh hearing "can I suggest things?" Usually comes off kinda like "I see stuff wrong with this :)" which can hurt a little even then

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

YEeeeah

🌈ERROR404 🌈

At least for my comic, i have sent bits and pieces for critique from creators i am friends with , but i'm really hesitant promoting myself because I don't feel like I'm not at a place to even get a critique i'll be able to make anything of. O(--( i really don't know what I'd do if someone tried to seriously analyze my plot and break down the story right now

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

It's really hard, because a lot of people (myself included) get scared when someone else asks, "Do you need help?"

Deo101 [Millennium]

I usually trust ppl to say whether they're looking for feedback

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Its always so tricky to gague the reactions of that. Some people handle that better than others So i only offer when they open up

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

Based on how people can get about even the offer of critique, yeah, I tend not to say anything. That’s their baby. If they want to open that door, then I’ll poke my head in

eliushi [Keyspace]

True too. I’m already in forums where feedback is wanted so I’m already in selection bias

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yeah, I like to only offer crits if someone is asking for it for that reason

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

for the record i'm always open to critiques

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

kinda mutal agreement on don't chime in unless asked lol

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah, at least in my groups we send things like "hey this and this are bothering me? Can you help?" And other than that it's just support

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yeah, that's a good idea

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

for both parties. For me, If it's something that I need thoughts I ask but otherwise, lmao my social circles ask me for help for their art stuff

Deo101 [Millennium]

We never agreed on that btw it's just kinda how it goes

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

That's a nice group way to handle that AND make the space more breathable for others who are more nervous about crit work

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

exactly

eliushi [Keyspace]

There’s a time and place for everything and feedback is no different

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah! Like here we have seperate chats for help and sharing

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yuss

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

When someone asks me if I'm open to suggestions, my reaction is usually "nOOoooOo..." but not always. I think it helps a ton if there's an existing rapport, like if I already know this person gets, REALLY gets, my work.

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

And that's okay Keii!

eliushi [Keyspace]

Yeah I’m super thankful for my betas for that

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

yee same

eliushi [Keyspace]

It’s very rewarding when people are also invested in your work to make it better within your means and style

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Honestly u gotta do whats best for u and ur mindset in the end.

Deo101 [Millennium]

It also is a little but awkward to say "no I'm not open to suggestions' cause it feels like you're saying "I don't care to improve" when in reality it's more like "no... I'm happy with this and I don't want it to be soured"

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I love the fact that if I post in #creator_art_share, nobody will critique me unless I ask. And if I post in #art_help, I can get that help. So incredibly nice

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Yes! Thats very respectful

eliushi [Keyspace]

So key

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Omg Deo.....such a mood LOL

Deo101 [Millennium]

I always feel so bad saying no thanks but it's like it looked good I thought

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

omg, I felt that in my soul

We beat ourselves up enough as it is

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Sometimes i know my work can be farty but... I dont also want perfection in every facet of my pieces too and thats okay! Some are learning pieces, others more indulgent

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah!

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I think I'd be very hesitant to accept ideas that will utterly break my core plot... unless someone comes out and outright tells me something about it is offensive or wrong or otherwise bad. But critique on the connective tissue between the bones, so to speak, heck yes. I've gotten some much better ideas from that.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

e.e even if i post in art share i would be honored to receive a critique from any of you

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Oh, if someone comes to me with suggestions that are that incompatible with my vision, I'm getting outta there.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

but i don't wanna post every single thing i do in art help hm

but maybe i should

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

I am SO getting outta there.

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I did had some suggestions that didn't... really help with my comic most of it are just comments and not pure criticism

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Just post it lol

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah it's probably best to leave crit in the crit section so as not to break that unspoken rule.

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

To signal to the rest of us

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Yea your vision is key, and i find that people who crit the work need a basic understanding of it for it to be a True Crit

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Yeah it's probably best to leave crit in the crit section so as not to break that unspoken rule.

good point

i wouldn't want people critiquing me to make others feel like it's okay to do that to everyone

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

A good attitude!!! Y'all are very respectable this is a wonderful topic

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

yeee

eliushi [Keyspace]

I think the best feedback is one where it makes your work become more effective within your vision. Sometimes it’s finding the betas who are invested but I also find betas who focus on different crafts also can offer a lot of wisdom. I find it comes down to being open and it’s never a bad thing to ask for clarification

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

[also writes this down for a potential lesson actvity for high schoolers] (edited)

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Yeah, a critique is supposed to help the work become a better version of itself, not a better [something else]

Deo101 [Millennium]

Mostly with true beta reading I am looking for "how clear is my work coming off to someone who knows nothing of my lore and backstory etc?"

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I like the idea of having at least one beta reader who's a writer, and at least one who's not. The writer can dissect things a bit more than a 'civilian' could while the civilian can look at surface-level things and react as the audience majority might.

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

multiple beta readers are a blessing lol

Deo101 [Millennium]

Cause with my friends, they already know everything I'm planning, so i worry a lot that they are putting together things that a regular reader wouldn't

So yeah same thing as a "civilian" reader, sort of!

eliushi [Keyspace]

For sure. Within my critique group I have novelists, webcomic creators and artists. Those who read the complete script and those who haven’t. It’s important to have all sides I find

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Dang you people with your luxury of multiple beta readers... I don't even have one (but it's mostly my fault; my scripts are unreadable)

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

omg lol

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

i'm sure you could use many of us as beta readers if you wanted to!

varethane

that surface-level 'first gut reaction' crit can be SO useful

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I change dialogue too frequently for a beta reader to have a fair chance, lol

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I started early with one years ago, but now I have like 5-10ish but they can't help me at the same time lmao

varethane

I agree upthread with when it was said that some of the most helpful crit was given unintentionally lol

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

same. i asked some people, including deo and crona, for a beta read of a script a while back but then ended up changing most of it lol(edited)

eliushi [Keyspace]

Most of my betas I found in forums like these! I’m sure a lot of us want to help each other out!

Deo101 [Millennium]

I usually only share stuff once I have at least a solid sketch and dialogue is in

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

so much changes in the thumbnail/layout stage for me. SO MUCH. whole scenes get swapped/cut/extended

I never keep it the same way

Deo101 [Millennium]

I don't like to share scripts cause also I don't usually script much anyways lol

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

@keii’ii (Heart of Keol) As a long-time reader of HoK, I would be more than happy to beta read if you ever wanted it. Just throwing that out there!

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

same Lazuli like

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I'd love to beta read for anyone too

varethane

I prefer sharing sketched pages because my scripts usually change SO much in between being written and going onto the page

like, sometimes they're outright unrecognizable

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

@Deo101 [Millennium] Same. The couple times I really wasn't unsure about a scene, I had to find someone and give them cleaned up thumbnails

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah I don't share more than sketched pages with dialogue

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

SUPER cleaned up thumbnails

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

from thumbnail to final, like they aren't the same from before lmao

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Most helpful critique for me was just someone engaging with the story. "Man I love - and -, they're such good friends, but - pisses me the fuck off" and that was my intention, but i realized it was coming on a bit stronger than i liked and changed the next scene dramatically to make a future plot point where the last character needs to be trusted feel more earned(edited)

varethane

(anyone who seriously is down for beta reading, I have 3 finished chapters burning a hole in my buffer hhnnnnggggg)

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah cause also like, 80% of the crit is usually "well this paneling is unclear" kind of stuff too

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

also i don't mind if anyone is asking me to beta read

Deo101 [Millennium]

Which you can't do from a script anyways

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

or (I don't usually do this often but)

I'm also a sensitivity beta reader too

so if you have questions about POC stuff, asian-american, er mixed-asian or mixed-black experiences

I'm willing to help lmao

but i'm just one perspective to the table

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

A lot of comments, not critiques, have influenced scenes I put later too. Things to clarify, expand, emphasize. I take every comment like that as an idea. I love knowing what the readers hope to learn.

eliushi [Keyspace]

I’m in the midst of a 180k plus word count novel beta and alphaing a couple works but once that’s all done, happy to take a look too

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

holy

Deo101 [Millennium]

Wowie

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Getting trustful beta readers i gotta say again is so important bc sometimes when asking for some, u run into betas that are there to just exploit that privilege too (tho rare) And!!!! Be respectful of ur betas on the other side of the spectrum

Deo101 [Millennium]

Exploit how?

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

like to read your work early?

eliushi [Keyspace]

Definitely pick your betas wisely

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Usually just the free ride of Knowing the Story or the opportunity to just Constantly Crit (non helpful) bc of personal reasons

Deo101 [Millennium]

Damn

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I'm imagining having someone sneak in as a beta and reveal they're a rabid toxic fan trying to influence the plot to their liking. As an absolute worst scenario

Deo101 [Millennium]

Spooky

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Yea.... There's def ppl out there that would do that THOUGH RARE again. I think that's more of like Competition in the field or spite? But ive heard it happening and its not cool

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

like people just looking for a free ticket to complain about your work?

i can see that

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

Oh yeah, I had folks like that before

after that I'm just like "thank you for your time" and block them after LMAO

Deo101 [Millennium]

That sucks :(

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

hhhhhhh

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Yea And u can always tell a sincere crit from a one that comes from a place of malice and ill intent pretty easy.

eliushi [Keyspace]

Exactly

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

oof

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Still!!! A horrible experience

Deo101 [Millennium]

:< yeah

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yeah.. I've never had anything like that happen, but wow... that's a terrifying notion

eliushi [Keyspace]

You tend to want to know your betas more than just them being a reader too. I like to think my betas are my friends and it’s a two way street where I help them too

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Some betas sign papers of confidentiality to avoid these instances of people running off with ur work too

eliushi [Keyspace]

There are paid betas but that’s business side and yeah Krispy

Deo101 [Millennium]

/stress

eliushi [Keyspace]

I don’t have them for mine

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Its scary bc we're all so small and our work is mainly for free U have to be wary of this

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I could easily see myself getting sucked into a bad situation like that I trust people too easily sometimes

but ugh... ya gotta learn

eliushi [Keyspace]

It’s good to know the risks. That being said, I think the rewards of having a good beta far exceed the bad apples. You have to set good boundaries

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Not that any of yall would do this omgjghg

Deo101 [Millennium]

Same Claire ajdjdnsdjjjdjdjdjddj

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

gonna steal all y'alls IDEAS

eliushi [Keyspace]

It’s also totally valid to say, hey something came up and I can’t beta anymore

Key is communication

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

lmao ya gotta kill me for my ideas

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Isossn Watch out for that Claire lady

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

https://tenor.com/view/laugh-giggle-mutley-dick-dastardly-snicker-gif-5552702

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Omg Eli yesssSSSSS that!!! Is important for both creator and beta to have that communication

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Oh no, my precious ideas!!!

Deo101 [Millennium]

Eh even if u steal my ideas you can never steal my characterizations!

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

just steal everything and make a horrible hodgepodge of all of our webcomics, like some sick frankenstein's monster

Deo101 [Millennium]

I don't think my ideas are the best part of my stories anyways :P

Ahsjdjfjdjfjdjfjdififiididkfkdje Frankensteins webcomic

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

my ideas are relevant to my cultural background so I'm like lmao

eliushi [Keyspace]

I learned from my novel days that ideas are dime and dozen and it’s the execution that counts(edited)

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I would actually love that tbh

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Oh no id read it tho XD

Deo101 [Millennium]

Massive crossover event

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

YES

PLEASE

eliushi [Keyspace]

Super smash bros when

varethane

lmao

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

hahaha

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I really want people going into healthcare to critique my personal statement, but I won't send it to anyone because I've legitimately heard of people stealing others' personal statements and getting both people rejected

Deo101 [Millennium]

Wow

eliushi [Keyspace]

That’s scary and unfortunate

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

ooof

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

it's almost worse than stealing a story idea because you're stealing like

someone's life story??

or their personality??

it's extremely strange to me

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah that's ??????

eliushi [Keyspace]

I would consider having a mentor look over your statement but that’s veering off creator babble territory

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

oh i am doing that and very very thankful to them

Deo101 [Millennium]

Good suggestion and good point

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

After recently seeing a whole comic style/theme completely and obviously lifted from another one... yeah, the things that make your comic yours? They can absolutely be stolen whole-cloth

It's scary

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

oh no

god what even is the fun in that??

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I don't know. I really don't.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

you know what i want to spend years doing? telling a story that's already been told, except worse!

varethane

Deo101 [Millennium]

I've had someone steal designs before

varethane

dpsofasdj I am so curious about these cases now aaahhh

Deo101 [Millennium]

Ppl do steal stuff. But what sucks for them is I'm the one with a brain and I can make new things

eliushi [Keyspace]

I’ve seen similar styles but have not seen a purposeful recreation of another’s style whether as impersonation or plagiarism

Haruh2 (Colony Life)

i just read a webtoon that was "inspired" by an anime with many ideas from anime too

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

It was a case where I always thought the two looked surprisingly similar, but then... yeah, you learn more things and you go AW GOD OKAY

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

this, and offensive stuff, is a case where i think unsolicited critique is 100% okay

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah, though then it's the line of "is it offensive just to me? Or overall?"

Though I guess saying "this offended me" isn't horrible or whatever

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

i think of the trend of lgbt youtubers making videos making fun of anti-lgbt crap and that's a case where i'm like yeah! pile on!

You have a good point and there are cases where something is almost objectively offensive

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah, and then there are other cases where ppl are offended by how I've decided to have no homophobia where it's like "okay sure but I'm not doing anything wrong"

But yeah there are definitely times where it's like "no that's bad for sure and I'm allowed to be critical of and mad about it"

I also think there's a difference between criticizing mass media and criticizing independent media

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Wait What what omg???? Thats???? So backwards

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

well, here's an anti-critique. it offends me when someone says that being lgbt must be hard and sad all the time!

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah! I'd agree with that LOL

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

can I just be happy

as a bi woman

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

"IT'S NOT LIKE MY LIFE THEREFORE IT'S INACCURATE"

Deo101 [Millennium]

Ahdjfjskfkdkckskfksdksk yeah

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

So true tho!!

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

God, I hate that argument

Deo101 [Millennium]

Though I do think that its worth it to open yourself up to that kind of critique to potentially reach the people who do need your story

Krispy §[Ghost Junk Sickness]§

Yes def agree

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

True true

If there's a blind spot you're missing, then for sure

Deo101 [Millennium]

Well, I was meaning more like "you can't please everyone, but that shouldn't stop you from trying your best anyways!"

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

Ah! also true

Deo101 [Millennium]

Like not necessarily blind spots, but more like. Some people will be mad no matter what sorta thing

Yee

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

so tru

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

Yeah for sure. I've tried to cover my bases on certain things in my own work, but I'm sure if it ever gets bigger, someone will be unhappy about something.

I'm not ready for that day, but... maybe it'll come

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah. Like I said I had someone get mad at me for not having homophobia

Where it's like... Okay stop reading then cause this isn't the story for you

Actually my friends replied to then and they did kinda turn around on their thinking, I think, so that was nice!

There's something I'm bad at for the question, is replying to my comments

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

oh? :0

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

okay sometimes i've said to my friends "yo weird ass comment, right?" and they've gone and defended me like way extra hard

i'm always grateful but also a little (edited)

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah same. .

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

too mch man

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah it's like Thank you but

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I do have some weird comments but the ones that I just kinda trying to offend me

I don't look at it till after a few months and respond to them calmly lmao

no point for me to just get rilied up for someone trying to get on my nerves but rip that's probably just me and how I deal with that stuff in irl too

I don't let my friends go after bozos lmao

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah for me I just like. Try really hard to be diplomatic, I guess? But it takes a lot of energy

When what I WANT to say is "lol read another comic then" or something but I try to think of a way to be nice

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

yee I understand on that. for me I'm just say it as it is if at's the moment but for more heated comments I address them after a few months lol

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I haven't gotten any weird randos yet apart from... one legendary one But things are always calmer on your own site far away from Tapas/Webtoons

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I agree on that but lmao

I did had one angry commenter going agro for few of my pages

and I looked at it and I was like "Oh worm man"

they were just reacting to my characters being shit LMAO

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

OH WORM MAN

very good

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I ignore it tbh. I recently had someone comment "All lives matter" at the end of my comic because I included "Black lives matter" at the end. And I honestly knew i didn't have the mental fortitude to explain to them why that was so rude and missing the point.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

lol my mom is saying that stuff and i'm just like :|

okay mother

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I guess for writing for me, now thinking about it is that

on the prompt: I don't respond quick and I'm not really active much on interaction but I want to try more

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I haven't gotten any weird randos yet apart from... one legendary one But things are always calmer on your own site far away from Tapas/Webtoons

I really haven't either though! Just a few people saying mildly :| things, no hate or anything. Wt is not always as scary as its reputation

or maybe i'm in the eye of the hurricane idk

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

lol

I have had mostly good experiences too

Deo101 [Millennium]

I've had mostly good too!

I know I complain a lot but really I'm just salty and that's just a few bad things here and there

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

The comment I was thinking about earlier was just an innaccurate interpretation of characters' feelings. They thought some people had a romantic history. I wasn't going to respond but my friend went all "if you actually read the comic you would see th- " and I was thinking omg tone it down a bit

Deo101 [Millennium]

Bajsjdjekdjdkdjd

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

never underestimate the Friend Army

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I had a reader I didn't know defend me in the comments once. The original commenter was complaining about the length of my updates, and the other reader started railing on them. It was powerful lmao. I didn't even need to say anything

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Oh! same

Deo101 [Millennium]

I've had some ppl defend me or explain for me and it's like. Idk a special kind of magic ahahahah

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Oh for sure! It feels magical to know that some of your readers passionately love your work

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

Update-length complainers are so cathartic to smack down. Not that I've done it, I just... like seeing it

You're getting a free comic. Made by a human with a life. Chill

sssfrs (JOE IS DEAD)

All my comments are normal where are my weirdos

boogeymadam

someone take some of my weirdos, my comic attracts them

but not really because i accidentally gave claire one of my weirdos and i feel Sooooo bad

Haruh2 (Colony Life)

i feel im still a long way off from getting anyone with my comic

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

weirdos are contagious apparently

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

You don't have to be popular to get a weirdo

Sometimes like... you could have 1 regular commenter and that person is a weirdo

or not even a commenter, you show your work to a RL friend before posting it online, and the friend takes off their mask dramatically, and reveals their True Identity as a professional weirdo

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

for real, i was posting on SJ and had all of like a dozen followers and one guy went through and heavily critiqued a ton of my pages

Like technical stuff like paneling and flow of action?

Also said my female lead looks like a man and my animation was nauseating lol

Haruh2 (Colony Life)

heh well after i do this current update im working on, i'll be scraping how ive been doing updates and following some tutorials i finally found

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I like critique but even so that guy was :|

boogeymadam

omg noooo sorry that happened fish! D: unsolicited critics are some of the worst

DanitheCarutor

I guess that is the one thing I've been lucky with. I actually don't mind unsolicited critique, but I've never gotten any outside of one time someone corrected my character's grammar in the comments. Commentary like that is way more welcome than the occasional anonymous hate comment, and malicious article calling me a fetishist, which is all entertaining in its own way but not as easy to deal with. Now that critique is brought up I'm reminded that I need to work on how I respond to it. Like, I actually get kind of excited when someone takes the time to break down my stuff (even if it totally misses the mark with what I'm trying to accomplish), but I end up responding with a novel and sometimes it's worded in a way that sounds like I'm upset. I need to get better at keeping it short and sweet.

Feather J. Fern

I raise my hand to say I can't draw hands for the life of me still after praticing for a long time. I used all the techiques, tricks, and still my hands are just butts.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

make a universe where people have butts for hands

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

This is a really minor one and thankfully easy to correct after publishing, but: my ESL-ness shows sometimes, especially with prepositions and articles. My English isn't terrible; there's just some occasional "wait did they mean 'on' where they put 'in'..." That's on the surface level. I also can't do that 'just write the dialog and see how the characters bounce off each other' thing in English. I hadn't thought much about that until I started writing a story in Korean, and I was surprised how much easier it was to get flowin' with the dialog. I'm not toooo concerned about this one, as Get Flowin' is just one way of writing a scene. But it is a thing.

Feather J. Fern

Eightfish stop calling me out that I can draw butts better than hands okay(edited)

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

feather have fun drawing the gluteus maximus

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I see nothing wrong here

Moral_Gutpunch

I'm bettign most people here can draw hands better than me.(edited)

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

S’okay, my hand drawing is pretty bad

Feet is...also an issue

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

The best reference is the one attached to you, I always say

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

or make your so pose for you

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yes

That

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

looks back at comic and sees lots of guy characters with slender palms MHMMMM

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Hahaha

Lol

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

ahahha i have the same problem

some guys have thick ass fingers when i look at them closely omg

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yeah, everyone has pretty thin fingers in mine, because I have thin fingers(edited)

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

Okay yeah not gonna lie I HAVE made my SO pose for me. Several times.

Oh yeah don’t forget

Guys can have hairy knuckles too

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

I have had my SO pose his hands retroactively for me, imitating a panel I did And I was screaming inside LOL

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

this stuff makes me :00

Deo101 [Millennium]

I have hairy knucles and my hands are bigger than my dads

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Ughhhh, that's too much detail for me, Shadow

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

Yoslslzlzrhlzxzzkhzhlztututs funnily enough my SO’s hands and mine are of similar length

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

For such a small person, I have really long fingers

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

reminded me of a convo i had with some friends

they sent a reference and said they thought it was unrealistic because of how much the tendons stick out

and i said, no, that's how mine look

and it was interesting seeing the differences

Deo101 [Millennium]

everyone share hands

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I mean, especially since your fingers are stretched, the tendons stick out lol(edited)

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

Someone told me I have piano fingers

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

like i always think of my hands as the 'default,' because I see them the most but really there is much variation

deo has nice hands

look elegant

shadows hands look a lot like the rest of her :0

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

Whhhhhhhhh

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

tall librarian

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

GJOXJPSLZLJZDXKXYOF

Yeah true XD

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

My nails are super long rn

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

Holy shit the manicures

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I did it myself

Deo101 [Millennium]

thank U i have lovely hands that are big as fuck, and I can use as a ruler

because my pinky and thumb can stretch out exactly 10 inches

this cup is 10 inches tall

youre welcome

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

I have stubby baby hands as well as double jointed fingers, so I'm very aware my hands aren't "average" looking. Yet if I don't pay attention, I tend to draw hands kind of like mine

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Hahahaha, Deo!!

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

wow so useful i should measure my hands

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Me too tbh

Deo101 [Millennium]

I atually suggest it it comes in handy (ha) more than youd think

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

i found a joint that measures exactly 1 inch and i use it so much

Deo101 [Millennium]

yeah!!!

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

Whoooooa

Mine goes 8 inches

Deo101 [Millennium]

my hands are fookin hyuge bro

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

Wait

8.5

YEAH YOURS ARE GIANT

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

exactly 8 inches

omg your hands are huge

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Mine stretch out to just under 7.5 inches

Deo101 [Millennium]

in yalls defense I also have ehlers danlos so theyre probably stretching more than yours too

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

I have smol hands because I am smol

Deo101 [Millennium]

tiney

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Yus

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

surprised shadow managed to find a way to measure in inches haha

Deo101 [Millennium]

she said it wrong its actually 8.5 cm

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

8.5 inches

I used a ruler

In cm it’s 21

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

she said it wrong its actually 8.5 cm

hm maybe that's why she thinks hands are hard to draw

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

LMHfhgzmzjKfhl

Deo101 [Millennium]

because she has tiny baby hands and can barely hold the pencil... yes

its all coming together

shadowhood {SunnyxRain}

I will slap y’all with my tiny baby doll hands

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

i'm learning so much about you all today

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Now you see my pain

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

o h wait do you play music crona?

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Uh... Not really. I've messed around on the piano, and failed at playing the French horn

Deo101 [Millennium]

LMAO

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

Playing instruments is hard for smol hands

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

rip

Feather J. Fern

My tiny hands compared to my pen XD

Also I took the picture close up and at an angle so not cone cna make fun of my writsts which are narrower than my computer mouse

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

my wrists are also narrower than my mouse, and my mouse is pretty small

Deo101 [Millennium]

mine's about the same as my mouse

Feather J. Fern

Yeah I got a pretty small mouse too, I been told by people to eat more becuase of my wrists (It's an Asian thing apparently) and I'm like "First of all rude, second of all my health is not any of your concern random lady on the street"

Cronaj ~{Whispers of the Past}~

yup

Tiny wrist solidarity!

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Solidarity!

varethane

I don't have especially thin wrists but my hands are lowkey shaped pretty oddly. I only posted a photo of my hand petting a cat to FB and got a lot of comments like 'cute cat but what's with that hand????'

(it did look pretty weird from that angle. Like a noodle with a couple of noodlefingers at the end)

spacerocketbunny

Oh no Vare ;;;;;3;;;;;;;;;

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #comic tea party #ctp #creator interview #comic creator interview #creator babble

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kim-lexie · 5 years

Text

july favorites.

music.

intersection. this a japanese group, nevertheless some of the tracks are in english. i truly enjoyed having them pop up on my explore page, because their vocals are sweet and make me nostalgic about the music i used to jam to in high school. top tracks ‘you're the reason’ and ‘falling’.

‘snapping’ by chung ha aka the queen. seriously she stayed once again. this is just a great pump up kind of song!

‘that’s okay’ by kyungsoo. now the other one pumps you up, this one will make you cry and its probably because you realize that it will be a few years until we have a proper comeback for our boo d.o. TT

‘light’ by bts. a stunning track not just because it is bts. their japanese releases are next level, and it is incredible. the track, the vocals, the music video. it is the whole package, and i cannot wait to explore all the theories.

‘time of our life’ by day6. now i have been living under a rock just finally finding this track. seriously incredible and day6 only produces jams and that is a fact. p.s. i stan such dorks. hahaha

‘boom boom’ by nct dream. dream *slow clap and standing ovation*. the track is so fun, and i cannot believe that jisung’s vocals got lower like come on!

‘highway to heaven (eng version)’ by nct127. its a bop because our original version was a bop, and now its in english and now they are both on the playlist. some iconic lines from this iconic version that blessed us to pluto and back. don’t even get me started on the video, and the choreography! *swoons in all languages*

“when I'm with you its a vibe baby i can't lie” -taeyong

“last call are you coming with me, I've got some things you want to see, tell all your friends that youre busy. they know” -jaehyun

“they know we got the chemistry” -johnny

‘ill show you the world if you say so” - jungwoo

‘face’ by woosung. let me just say that woosung is a legend and this song is no less than perfection. i love it, and it is a bop. and everyone should stan this man.

dramas & moves *spoilers ahead*.

absolute boyfriend. can i just say that i love this man. this one right here.

i am watching all of his dramas, he is not only incredibly handsome but can seriously become whoever he wants. he plays dynamic characters that bring out different sides of him as an actor and i appreciate that. I. AM. IN. LOVE. okay now on to the review. i liked this drama, it was an interesting concept, and i dont know if i ever got completely on board because he was a robot, and it wasn't like with the other robot drama where we knew she wasn't an actual robot but he was legit a robot and ya know she is human sooo...yeah. never quite got on board. towards the end when everything with ma wong-joon was coming out i kinda wanted them to end up back together and i got on that ship rather than the she doesn't need a man at the moment ship. but i really liked this one, and i watched it live and it was pretty great. one of my fave moments:

wong-joon: right now dada might need you, but only humans can become friends or lovers with other humans.

yeong-goo: my girlfirned said she likes me. i like her too. we stay together because we like each other, not because we need each other. just like you and dada did before. but unlike you, we won't break up, since my heart that loves her won't change.

literally mic drop and wong-joon needed major ice for that burn. of course this was all before we knew his true desires but in the moment watching this drama i was like dang man you're not holding back.

i would give it a 6.5 out of 10.

search WWW. this drama was great, i love these kinda of work place dramas. unexpected first episode with them ending up together, and almost didn't want to keep watching because i was like dang if this is the first episode will it be too much later on, but all was well. i thoroughly enjoyed this one. the fact that it follows three bad butt ladies was incredible. i enjoyed everyone’s storyline, especially cha hyun and ji-hwan’s because come on, that fact that she loves dramas and ends up with the main lead. i couldn't contain my excitement when they developed feelings for each other. they were absolutely precious from beginning to end. the relationships that ta-mi had with her coworkers was golden and i loved how she was able to bring the unexpected talented from unicon to barro. let’s talk about our boo mo-gun. his story was so dynamic and unexpected. i loved how he cared for ta-mi without being too much, but when he left for australia it broke my heart, but then he came back later once everyone was settled, and ta-mi had found herself. i liked it. it was a good drama. i would rate it an 8.5 out of 10. cutest side story award goes to you-jin for hacking all of the traffic lights in seoul to have an afternoon walk with her boo in the highschool flashback. also this OST has been on repeat. “milky way between us” and “scent”.

there were so many hilarious moments. these two being some of them.

the secret life of my secretary. i love this man, seriously the reason i clicked on this drama and it did not disappoint. did not appreciate the deception at all and no excuses bc he was incredibly vulnerable and she knew this. he would have fallen for her anyway bc he had been wavering previously and there was no reason for her to do that to him. i hope others agree that she was completely out of line. but besides that central flaw, all the characters were dynamic and i was obsessed with our second leads bc they were adorable. i give it a 8.4 out of 10.

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ryangha · 4 years

Note

oh i definitely think youre right about osu n im a lil sleep deprived but yeah!! i was so shocked! and the fact we couldnt seen dana's face while she was ordering sasa to carry out the attack is. hm. i think that osu genuinely thinks what hes doing is for the best, and he approached dana bc of her never showing criminals mercy + he trusts her. osu himself never expected himself to live this long bc the twins cared for him, but morae is someone hold no2 back while at the same time

upturning his entire family. the earlier chapters said he was good at planning and manipulating people to get what he wants, and even in the ‘I’ll trust in you and believe u no matter what so talk to me’ his phrasing felt. concerning ('why are you up?’ 'because everyone decided to leave me alone’/'seeing u is so hard these days it makes me sad’/'I’ll help u with anything, so tell me’) but osu sounds a lot more…. Deliberately Searching for the response he wants in jp so maybe thatscolouring my view. ah, just remembering. osu said he was suprised he lived this long earlier. he himself has made peace with the fact that hes p much a dead man walking and that all his family is immortal and will see him come and go, so seeing him obsess over morae must be making him a lil antsy that no2 may Never get over morae (or him when he dies so this is like. shock therapy) - n u saw how destroyed he was when no2 got arrested.then again, i dont know what mental acrobatics led to this choice bc we dont. spend much time in osus head. or any time actually. he loves no2 and no2 loves morae but i wonder if osu feels a lil detached from morae himself?? like how naga felt about tracy and venom. but instead of trying to be sad he Cant bc morae sucks and gets upset bc of how much anguish this person has put him (osu) through and he hasnt even done so on purpose or met him so osu just wants him gone.N bc no1 is is primary caretaker from what i see and no1s been real fucked up abt morae since forever and that’s another reason osu may want him gone. but i do think he has an inferiority complex abt his health im sorry im like everywhere rn. im not making sense but yeah. basically i agree w everything u said im just Something atm

also i learned on the korean wiki osus longest relationship description is about dana and he has a section entirely dedicated to porn. dana has a section dedicated to her crush on him and her combi name in hs with judas was 'steel cotton candy’ and that added on with the fact that she was shy in her kid years and got teased made her dye her hair. then she cut it bc it was a pain in the ass to wash blood out of it. good night zzz

oh shit soooo that’s a bunch of facts that i have not thought about and youre right. osu really is trying even though if he thought he doesn’t see himself living very long, he at least could see baekmorae coming to his end so that osu will know that no.2 is better off than constantly trying to get him back… hmm i think you were alluded to this scene (this in the eng scene and for my refresher lol):

hmm idk i think it’s not as big as a diff in english but osu definitely sounds like he’s expecting no.2 to spill sumn to him… esp when he starts off saying ‘no one was here when i woke up’ or alike and continues to go on about how not only no.2 is busy but also no.1 (which they are involved with baekmorae’s case nd i think they’re right at least to involve osu as least as possible aside from using his family’s wealth/name in the later chpt) so he feels left in the dark. i don’t think he is in the dark tho he knows more than he lets on for sure… like you said, he’s “Deliberately Searching for the response he wants’ and i can read that in the eng trans as well :) also totally see what the readers are thinking earlier cause! i looked over and readers feared that osu was going to stick on no.2′s side where he would try to help him get baekmorae back, which earlier this chapter no.2 was talking to his sis that she doesnt blame baekmorae since murder was the usual back then, but i’m kinda glad the author wrote osu the complete opposite direction. i think he does look past the fact no.2 desperately wants to redeem himself/make amends to baekmorae and bc baekmorae is such a shitty person, osu would rather help him in the way of getting baekmorae outta his life like some emotionally festering parasite.

also agreed AGREED that we don’t get into osu’s head or barely any, which is a disappointment cause i know in the beta idwtkoh there was an arc where osu got kidnapped nd i feel like we could’ve known more about osu’s shady character back then compared to official idwtkoh. getting off kilter a little but yeah idk osu for sure knows that he’s sick nd been sick that it’s kinda ironic that his dads are immortal healers that can heal so much with him as an exception. it’s apparent that osu’s strongest relationship is with no.1 and no.2 so to see no.2 struggle with getting baekmorae back is like. YEAH exactly with how crushed osu looks (i also remember how osu apologized to dana nd that face crushed dana in return aaaAA) but i think osu for sure feels detached from baekmorae like. osu might be filling in his place for fake KNIFE but baekmorae is just this figurehead of villainy that SPOON’s been working for long to catch and i just feel like it’s easier for osu to feel apathetic or even dislike for baekmorae since he’s the source of no.2′s pain? well, we dont really know how much osu knows of no.2′s past and how he abandoned baekmorae but like. does osu think it’s the better path to forgive no.2 when he’s trying to apologize/redeem? don’t think osu has put himself in baekmorae’s shoes even though his relationship to no.2 is nearly the same without the mentor/mentee role. but yes, osu is prolly just like ‘if sumn messes up no.2 then they need to leave. permanently.’ or alike lol. it is strange to me how their positions regarding to no.2 are very similar tho….

HAH one day ill be able to translate those korean articles concerning osu’s relationship with dana AND dana’s crush on him but today is not that day. just wait for it lol but as recurring it is that osu’s bad habit is porn, i always forget to write about it when im writing osu lol. i didn’t know about dana’s combi name ‘steel cotton candy’ with judas hahaha they both must’ve hated that. idk if that special chpt was translated but dana and judas did dye their hair black without telling each other and thought they copied one another haha. i love these two’s interactions also sad for dana that she got teased for her pink hair. but i know she probably handled it all on her own. OH that’s so badass for her to chop off all her hair cause of the blood……. dana is the best i swear. and thank you for sharing all these facts nd im sorry if my response in turn is lackin cause im kinda out of it too lol but. always a good time talking about idwtkoh, especially a character like osu…….. he was a missed opportunity for more character exploration honestly.

THANKS AGAIN

#sorry this took so long #plus i was looking up stuff to match up with u #and idk shit too so #thanks for the discuss!!!#asks #이영싫 #yuissamidare

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fatrainbowmermaidunicorn · 6 years

Text

Girls Like You (Jungkook x You ONESHOT) (M)

A/N: This is my first full blown smut fic ever. Thank you anon for making me sin. And sorry this took so long. I need to find the courage to actually write a sentence that has my precious bunny and the word cock together. hahaha. 😂😂😂 As a reminder like always, I am not good in smut so please, show me some mercy, and you are welcome to skip the smut part if its too cringe worthy, the story would still be relevant. And yeah, as this is my first smut, the scenes are still quite vanilla. imma keep the nasty stuff for later. hahaha

MASTERLIST

Jungkook slide his cock a few more times inside her wet, tight center, his face scrunched up in pleasure before he pulls out and crawl on top of her, thighs on both sides of her face, pumping himself directly to her mouth.

"Open wide for me baby. Tounge out,"

Obident as she has always been, Y/N quickly darted out her tounge like a starved man waiting for Jungkook to fill her mouth up with his creamy bitter liquid. Jungkook wrapped his hand around his rigid cock and pump a few more times before shooting up his load on the tounge that is laid out in front of him. Just like the good girl that she is, Y/N swallows everything without question, licking her lips when she's done and open up her mouth to show that she has swallowed it all like a good obidient girl.

"That was amazing as always baby girl," Jungkook smirked as he reached out on top of her head and released her bound wrist from the leather that held it to the headboard. He swiftly starts to put his boxers back on and button up his shirt, looking at Y/N who just flashed him an obligatory smile, slowly pulling up the blankets to cover her naked and dirty body that has been throughly used by him just minutes ago.

"Here's something for you," he throws a wad of cash on the bedside table. "I wont be coming tomorrow night. As usual. So you dont have to wait for me. Use the money to go shopping or something," he smile and without even looking back he walks out from her room and her apartment, leaving Y/N alone in the luxurious apartment, feeling disgusted with herself like she always does whenever he leaves after getting his way with her.

Living a life as a sugar baby is not something Y/N has ever imagined herself being. In fact, she felt disgusted by her friends who proudly brags about the expensive jewellery or holiday trips their supposed daddies, boyfriends, sir or whatever it is that they call them, has brought for them. All those luxuries comes with a price of course. A price they dont seem to mind paying at all.

Their body.

"Oh come on Y/N. Its just sex. And you are doing it with a young, hot and wealthy man anyway, not some old perverted hag. You are the one who is getting more of the advantage actually, you get both money and pleasure," Min Hwa grins at her. Min Hwa is one of her first friend since she entered college, she dont really considered them to be best friends, but Y/N do talk and spend a lot of time with her. And ever since Min Hwa has been in the sugar baby scene, she has a lot more money to spend on her friends for coffee and snacks sessions, and who is Y/N to say no to free food. Her starving student ass could never resist that.

Min Hwa always talk, no, bragged, about how great it is to be a sugar baby, especially when her daddy is some young hot shot CEO who has too much money to waste. Y/N never fail to cringe whenever she talks about it but today... well its different. Today, this topic sparks her interest.

As a medical student studying to be a doctor, her years of studying is long and expensive. With a sick mother and two younger siblings to take care of, Y/N's part time jobs doesnt seem to cut it anymore. Quitting her studies is not something she wants to do, but is her dream big enough for her to hold on to to actually consider living the life like Min Hwa?

"Really Y/N. You are absolutely hot! Look at your face. Your body! You can get in no problem. And let me tell you a secret," she leaned in closer. "Jungkook is looking for another baby girl for him," she giggles, making Y/N swallow nervously. Is this her friend's way to help her find a solution to finance her study and family? Somermthing suddenly spark her curiousity.

"Wait. Isnt this Jungkook your boyfriend or whatever you call him?"

"He is not my boyfriend Y/N. I just calls him Jungkook and sometimes daddy in bed," she winked. "But never ever calls him oppa or you will be punish. He hates that the most. Not that I mind being punished by him," she lets out a laugh as Y/N just stare at her. Is she for real right now? Is it that fun to have sex for money? "And to answer your question, yes. Why?"

"You mean... you are not the only girl he do this... arrangement with?" Min Hwa shakes her head.

"Of course not. He is young and absolutely delicious looking. He is freaking hot Y/N. You should see him. Not to mentioned he is incredibly rich. Money means nothing to him. Of course I am not the only girl. Even I would get myself a barrage of girls if I am him,"

"And you dont mind this? Sharing him?" Min Hwa shrugged as an answer.

"Nope. Not at all. Its not like he is my boyfriend Y/N. He buys me things and gives me money for whatever I need. And my job is to make sure he is satisfied whenever he comes to see me and that is all there is to it," she swirled the straw in her drink. "Besides, Jungkook keeps an open relationship with his girls. We are free to meet other boys and we can end the agreement whenever we decide to get serious with someone else,"

"Oh... that's interesting," Y/N nodded her head. That really is. She felt a little more relaxed an assured upon hearing that. So this Jungkook is not some kind of a sex crazed monster then. Usually, the stories she heard about this type of relationship, if you can even call it that, is more possesive and one sided. The girl wont usually be allowed any other interaction with other males. But then again the man dont usually have many girls at the same time. Maybe that's why this Jungkook doesnt mind? Because who knows how many girls he has to keep him company anyway?

"Jungkookie only has one crucial rule though. Never fall in love with him. If you do, the arrangement is over immediately," Min Hwa warned.

"Does that ever happen?" Y/N is curious. How can anyone ever falls in love with a cold man who uses his money to pay young girls for pleasure? "His girls falling in love with him?"

"Oh babe. You cant imagine how many did. Jungkookie is sweet. He treats you nicely. He talks to you and ask you about your day and he will make sure not to cross any of your boundaries. Not to mention he is extremely, and I repeat, extremely, good and amazing in bed," Min Hwa winked. "So Y/N, are you in?"

And that is how Y/N ends up underneath Jungkook one week later.

Their first meeting was a little awkward. Of course it is. She is meeting with some stranger to have sex with him. For money. But Min Hwa was right. Jungkook makes her feel comfortable, he talks to her, asking about her interests and even making small jokes to ease up the tension. And not to mention incredibly good looking. Her heart slightly beat faster when he flashed her a smile and it almost burst everytime their bare skin accidenrally touched

"I only have a few conditions Y/N, if you may call it that," he flashed her a cute bunny smile, something that makes him look so innocent if not for the knowledge of what they are discussing right now. Y/N nodded as a sign for him to proceed.

"One, I can come and go whenever I want and whenever I do come, you will always be ready for me. I will tell you beforehand if I'm not coming on certain days so that you can make your own plans," Y/N nodded. Sounds reasonable.

"Two, this is strictly a sex relationship. You are free to meet anyone else that you one but if you do sleep with them, you need to wear protection and inform me about it," Well, nothing to worry about there. Y/N has only ever did it a few times and that is only with her first boyfriend a long time ago. Its already hard enough for her to decice to sleep with one guy, let alone multiple partners? Not likely going to happen.

"Three, I like to, you may call it, experiment in bed, so you will tell me if anything I want to do is too much for you and I will stop. Dont ever be afraid to tell me that. Its not just about my pleasure. Its about yours too," he smile and Y/N's heart beats faster. Can someone like him actually be caring?

"Four, the moment you agree, I will be giving you an apartment to live in and a car. The car will be under your name. Which you do not have to return when we end this arrangement. It will belong to you. I will also give you monthly expenses and extra bonus for everytime we fucked," Y/N cringe at his vulgar choice of words but what can she do. He is only saying the truth. That is what she is here for. To fuck.

"And finally, five. This is the most crucial rule. Do not, under any circumstances, fall in love with me. Or catch feelings or whatever you call it. If I found out, this arrangement ends immediately, no questions asked," Y/N nodded. Well, Min Hwa has warned her about that before.

"Any question?"

"Uh n-no sir," she shakes her head.

"Call me Jungkook," he smiles. "But you can call me sir in bed if you prefer," he winks.

/////

"Fuck, you are so fucking tight Y/N. I should have known that from the innocent look you gave me today, nobody has ever fucked you this good isnt it? Its alright daddy will take care of you," Jungkook pants as he slide his cock in and out her drenched pussy. One hand holding the back of her knee to make sure she wrapped it tight around his waist while the other is holding the headboard tightly, to help bracing himself as he rammed continuosly into her. Y/N was lost for words. The white hot pleasure surging through her leave her speechless. With the way Jungkook occasionally take a hard nipple in his mouth, rotating from one side to another, suckling and teasing the hard nub, the way his fingers rub her clit so fast, all the while his cock keeps on thrusting into her, Y/N feels like dying from the extreme pleasure.

"I-I'm coming Jungkook. Fuck,"

"Come baby girl. Let me feel you all over my cock," he leans down and start kissing her neck, one hand going between their sweaty bodies to rub her engorged clit faster and faster, and in no time at all Y/N was clenching all over his cock, her orgasm coming in multiple wave. Her loud moans being captured by Jungkook mouth as he keeps thrusting into her through her orgasm. Feeling her walls clenching tightly around him is too much for Jungkook to handle and he quickly pulls himself out.

"On your knees,"

Confused at his demand at first, Y/N finally crawled in front of him and kneeled down, hands obidiently folded in her lap as Jungkook hastily stroked his cock up and down, sweat dripping from his forehead to his delicious abs.

"Fuck, here it comes babygirl," He finally shoots his load onto her face, white sticky liquid smeared everywhere from her hair down to her chin. Jungkook pants from the satisfying pleasure he just experienced and flopped down on the bed. "You look gorgeous with my cum on your face baby girl," he grins and heads out to the bathroom.

Shaken by her first experience of sleeping with this incredibly handsome and not to mention talented man, Y/N sat at the corner of the bed, waiting for him to get out from the bathroom, still confused and not knowing what she can and couldnt do. This is their first time together after all. Jungkook came out from the bathroom already fully dressed and chuckle at the sight of Y/N, still fully naked with his cum on her face sitting like a good girl she is on the bed waiting for his next instructions, her arms shyly covering her bare chest. Seeing her looking all wide eyes and innocent, staring up at him makes his cock stirred again but he knows once is enough for her tonight. It is their first time together afterall.

Maybe he can trained her to take more later.

"Why are you just sitting there?"

"I-uh I dont know what I'm supposed to do. What I am allowed to do," she answered, looking down at her fingers. Jungkook chuckles. How can someone so sweet and innocent be willing to be involved in something like this? With someone like him?

"You can go clean yourself up babygirl. I think I have tire you enough for tonight," he smiles and Y/N quietly stood up and went into the bathroom. After a quick shower and changing into a set of fresh and clean clothes, Y/N went out only to find the apartment empty and a stack of cash on her night table, and she has never ever felt more dirty.

/////

Jungkook came over quite often after that night, which surprises her. Min Hwa told her before that Jungkook had different girls for every day of the week and he will only visit them once a week, on their designated day. But Jungkook never say anything to her, nor has he set a specific day for her. It has been a month and he has come to her for almost every night.

Nights with Jungkook were never boring. Sure, she still feels dirty and guilty after but she cant deny the pleasure Jungkook gave her every night, or the multiple pleasure he gave her on some nights. Jungkook is amazing in bed, he taught her various new things, experimenting with toys and things Y/N never even know existed. But that wasnt the best part for her. To her the best part is after all the sweaty and dirty sex they have, the part when Jungkook is willing to stay over and would let her cook up some ramen or heat up some leftovers and they would sit on the kitchen bar, talking about each other's life.

Y/N never expected a sugar daddy relationship to be like this. She always thought its all about the pleasure and the money, no in betweens. But after a month of late night talks, she realizes Jungkook is nothing like the man she imagined him to be. He is funny, interesting, childish, competitive, smart and creative. He is a man who have dreams and fears. Shredding the expensive suits, the shiny watches and devilish smirk, Jungkook is only just a normal ordinary man, and that is the part of him that she likes best.

/////

"H-how was your day today?"

Five words were stuttered to him. Five words that change everything he thought he knew. Five words that Y/N said to him after one of their steamy nights as he is tying his expensive leather shoes, ready to leave. Five words that is softly uttered to him, laced with fear of him flipping out from the question, by the girl who was wrapped only in the blanket over her naked body, peering behind the wall, eyes innocently wide. Five words that makes him stop what he is doing and turn back inside.

No one. No one has ever asked him that question. No one ever cares how his day has gone by. All the people around him only cares about how many millions did he gain today? How many projects did he get his hands on today? Is he interested in some new land? The girls he fucked only cares about the jewelleries he bought them. The fancy new dress he will bring them. The branded handbags he will purchase for them. Nobody cares if he has eaten, or if he is feeling well or if the world around him chewed him up today. For years Jungkook tries to find salvation from his lonely life in the form of shallow entertainment, getting drunk and high, taking advantage of the girls that is blinded by his wealth, when all he ever wants is someone to talk to. Someone who is really willing to listen to him. Someone who actially cares.

And when Y/N looks back at him with her innocent wide eyes, hands nervously gripping the sheets covering her body, slightly shaking from fear of upsetting him, the sincerity of her question shone through, Jungkook knows he has finally found that someone.

So he keeps coming back.

Without realizing, a month has passed by where he had spend most of his nights with Y/N instead of his other daily girls. He feels lighter whenever he came by, and its not just because the things they do in bed, and trust him, Y/N is amazing in bed. Shy at first, now she seems to be more into it, willing and eager to try eveeything he suggested. It makes him extremely happy to see her enjoy herself. In fact, unlike with how he usually is with his other girls, Jungkook seems to focus more on bringing her the pleasure instead of thinking of what he wants and what he needs first.

"You look pretty," he smiles at Y/N who just came out from the bathroom after their mind blowing fuck session together, drying her hair, dressed in a very simple night gown. Most of the girls he slept with will wrapped themselves in expensive silk and complucated designs. Designs that are supposed to interest him, supposes to make him wants them even more, but he never even batt them an eye. All of them are just the same to him. Willing to be fucked as long as he pays for it. How is it that this girl who is dressed in a very simple white cotton night gown managed to make his cock stir again? Making his heart beats faster? Jungkook tries to pushed his desire aside but when Y/N actually blush from his compliment, none of his girls are innocent enough to blush from a simple compliment, Jungkook knows he is already gone.

He immediately stood up, making the silky sheets thats covering his naked body slide off, revealing taut muscle and his red hard cock, already weeping, hard and ready for another round, making Y/N's eyes widen as she gazed at the beautiful man stalking towards her.

"How are you doing this to me?" His voice is raspy and ragged with lustful breath as he leans and hungrily captured her lips with his. Y/N was beyond surprise. During the time they had spend together, Jungkook never once kissed her. Kissing means feelings he said. Kissing means intimacy. Kissing meant someone special and none of them are that to him. That is what he said. So why is he kissing her now? Y/N doesnt have the time to ponder about his real reason as he starts to bit her lower lips and his tounge proding her mouth, asking for entrance which she immediately allows. Jungkook taste sweet, with a mix of alcohol and mint and all around just pure Jungkook. A taste so intoxicating and heavenly, Y/N knows she is already addicted to.

"Take it all off for me baby," Without hesitation Y/N slides down the straps of her night gown and let the material pool at her feet. Revealing herself bare except for a matching white cotton panties she wore underneath. Jungkook drink in every little skin that is revealed to him and leans closer, lowering his head to her breast, capturing one hard nub, suckling a hard nipple in his mouth, making Y/N moan louder and louder, her hands trying so desperately reaching for the walls behind her for support before her weak knees gives out on her. Jungkook continues his ministration, switching from one nipple to other while his fingers deftly grazed her clothed core, making her breath nkre raghed at his touch.

"J-jungkook,"

"God. I love it when you moan my name baby girl. But I think you can go loider than that. And I surely can make it louder," he smirked and swiftly went down on his knees placing his nose between her legs right where ahe wants him the most and inhaled her intoxicating smell.

"Ermmm I love that smell baby girk. The smell that shows just how wet you already are for me," Y/N can already feel herself getting wetter just from his words and apparently Jungkook can see it too by the wet patch forming on her clean white panties. Without waiting for an answer, he pulls her already ruined panties down her leg, revealing her drenched pussy to him.

"So beautiful. Always so beautiful," he whispered loud enough for her to hear as he uses his thumb and forefinger to spread open her pussy lips and give a small soft kiss to her clit.

"J-jungkook!"

"You like that baby hmm?" Y/N can feel him smiling as his warm wet tounge start to lick a broad stripe before he increases his speed and lapped up her whole sex, slowly and soft at first and slowly start to pick up the pace. Y/N feels like losing her mind at the pleasure, her hands starts to pull on his hair as Jungkook suckle on her already engorged clit. It didnt take her long to reached her orgasm, releasing her juice all over Jungkook's tounge and face, which he happily lapped up as she rode her high. He stood up with a smile and face her, licking the corner of his mouth, turning her on even more.

"Your taste is addictive baby," Y/N was panting, too caught up in her strong orgasm that she didnt resist when Jungkook kissed her again, hungrily, tounge proding into every inch of her mouth, making her taste herself before spinning her around, pinning her chest to the wall. She can feel his hard cock grazing the curve of her ass and Jungkook pushed her back to make her bend over. He sticks his chest on her back, placing his face only a centimeter from hers, his warm breath and his scent sending tingle to her whole body.

"Tell me you want me baby girl. Tell me. I want to hear you say it,"

"I-I want you Jungkook. Please. Please fuck me,"

Jungkook lost all control at her words and immediately slide his cock fully into her, thrusting slowly at first, trying to enjoy the feel of her warmth walls enveloping him. He round his hands over her body and cupped both of her breasts, fingers twiddling with her nipples making her moan louder.

"You like it baby? You like me fucking you from the back againsts this wall? You want me to fuck you harder?" Jungkook growled as he starts to kiss the side of her neck, biting and grazing his teeth against it. "Tell me. Tell me what you want!"

"Yes Jungkook. Yes. Fuck me harder, please. Oh god!" Jungkook immediately picks up his pace, thrusting and pounding into her fast and hard, the only sounds filling the room is their mixed ragged breaths and moans. Jungkook can feel her getting closer and closer by the sound of her breath and how tight she is clenching around him. One hand reached down her body and start to rub her clit fast and hard, helping her to reach her high, needing her to come first, to make sure she feels the pleasure first.

"Oh God Jungkook, I'm- ahhhh I'm coming,"

Her walls clenched so hard around him that Jungkook immediately releases himself inside of her a second later. Panting from their mind blowing orgasm, Jungkook turns her around and captured her lips for a long hard kiss, and once again, taking her by surprise.

Y/N closes her eyes as he moulded his soft lips against hers. She slowly kissed him nack, taking in every kittle taste of him that she could, deciding to just enjoy this moment. The moment that Jungkook really felt like he belong to her.

"Y/N?" A hand wave in front of her, startling her from her daydream. She snapped back to reality only to see her classmate looking at her weirdly, the class already empty. "Uh, class has been over for 10 minutes now and you have been staring at nothing for the whole two hours of lecture. Are you sure you are okay?" Y/N flashed her a smile and nodded.

"Yeah. Yeah. I am totally fine. Just thinking about what to eat tonight," her friend looks at her, obviously not believing her lie but decides not to ask further. Y/N gathered her books and left the class, walking slowly back to her apartment. Well, Jungkook's apartment. Not that he has been around much lately.

Truth is, Jungkook is the one who has been plaguing her mind. She cant understand him at all. He came over almost every night for a month, take time to talk to her, get to know her and make her feel like they have some kind of a connection other than just sex for money, and he kissed her that night, and then he just left?

That night.

That night will be the night that Y/N will treasure forever. Jungkook made love, yes, she can finally calls it making love and not some raw fucking like he usually did this time, three times that night and he kissed her. Multiple times. She knows it must mean something to him too. She can feel it in his kiss and the gentle way he cuddles her between sessions.

But when she woke up the next morning, he was gone. No text, no note, no calls nothing. And she didnt hear from him for almost three weeks now. The only thing that confirms he is still well and alive is the fact that her account balance keeps on increasing.

What did she do wrong?

Has Jungkook finally had enough of her?

Just the thought make her heart clench. The thought that she might never see him again, talk to him, see his smile, hear his laugh, feel his touch. It scares her to no end. And thats when Y/N realizes she is fucked.

She fell in love with Jeon Jungkook.

And maybe he knows it too, and thats why he went away.

Y/N didnt have to wonder for long where he is when she saw his expensive Italian made shoes at the doorway. A huge smile immediately creeped up her face at the thought of seeing him. She misses him, and although she knows its wrong, she cant help it.

She's in love.

Her smile quickly dissappear when she take another step further into the apartment and saw two pairs of women's red high heels that definitely didnt belongs to her. Did Jungkook brought someone home? Its fine of course, it is his house anyway, but why would he bring his girls to where she is? After dissappearing for weeks? What is he trying to proof?

As she entered the living hall that is situated right in front of her bedroom, she can finally hear it. Two women's voices screaming out Jungkook's name and his ragged breathing. Is this really happening? Did Jungkook really brought back his girls to her place and fuck them in her bedroom? Of all places, her bedroom?

"Fuck Jungkook faster," a raspy women's voice scream out, which Y/N quickly named as women #1. Her heart starts to ache. "Oh god, Jungkook, you are eating me out so well, fuck baby," there goes women #2. She knows. She knows she is not the only one. That is fact. But must he do this to her?

She thought what they had, what she felt that night was special.

Maybe... maybe it really is just sex and what they had is really nothing special to him at all.

Y/N tried to calm her heart but it breaks into pieces with what she heard next.

"God, you are beautiful," Words that he used to say to her.

"Kiss me Jungkook," and wet sloppy sound of kisses filled the room. Y/N couldnt handle it. She really does mean nothing at all to Jungkook. Just another girl. Another sex doll to him. Those nights spend talking and revealing her heart apparently meant nothing special to him.

She is nothing special to him.

She braced herself and curled into a ball on the couch, waiting for them to be done, and thankfully it didnt take long. The two girls, hair and makeup ruined, smile shyly at her as they put on their shoe and pull on their dresses, adjusting it, somehow trying to make themselves look presentable enough for the outside world before they went out, locking the door behind her.

Jungkook came out a few second later, shirtless, hair messy, body filled with marks and scratches and he gave a cold glare as he noticed Y/N sitting on the couch. Y/N cant understand it. Why is he being so cold to her. What did she ever do to him that make him changed?

"Oh, you are back. Sorry, we borrowed your room, thought you will be in class all day," His words so cold, only giving her a side glance as he uttered the words.

"Y-yeah okay..."

"What's with you?" He asks questioningly as if he didnt do anything wrong. Well, come to think of it, he really didnt do anything wrong but why does Y/N's heart breaking?

"Me? What wrong with you?" Y/N find some courage to actually questioned him, something she has never done, not even once during their time together. Jungkook raised an eyebrow at her defiance.

"Are you... are you seriously defying me? Talking back to me?" He took a few steps closer towards her. Y/N gulped in fear. Despite everything she has been feeling for him, fear is still a big part of it.

"I-I'm just asking you. Yo-you didnt call or text for weeks and-"

"Baby girl is so feisty today," he smirked, taking long strides towards her, now already standing right in front of her, carressing her cheeks. Y/N, although scared and mad at him, feels herself gets weaker with his touch, leaning into his palm. God, she missed him. "Since when have you been such a naughty girl huh? You know daddy doesnt like that," Jungkook snarled and pull her down on the couch, laying her down on his lap. All thoughts of questions and anger flies out from her mind the moment Jungkook lifted up her skirt and carressed her ass, pushing down her panties to leaving it at her thights, restraining her movements, his hands palming her bare ass. "Such a beautiful sight. Too bad you have been a bad girl today, so you must received your punishment. Do you understand me? Hmmm?" Y/N can only moan at the sensation she felt as his palms keep carressing her ass cheeks. Shit, she can feel herself dripping on Jungkook's thighs.

"Answer when daddy ask you a question baby girl,"

"Y-yes daddy," Y/N can feel Jungkook's cock twitch when she called him what he wanted to hear and it just turns her on more. Pleasing him. Theres no bigger turn on than that in her books.

"Count," was what he said before his cold palm hits her bare ass, rotating from cheek to cheek leaving beautiful stinging red marks.

"O-one,"

"Hmmm, beautiful. Red is really your colour baby girl," Each spank he kanded on her will be accompanied with gentle carressed from Jungkook's cold hands, making her moan louder everytime, the sensation bringing both pain and pleasure to her.

"Fif-fifteen," her voice weak and the last slap hits her ass. Jungkook scooped her up and kiss her lovingly, tounge hungrily lapping hers before putting her down.

"You did great baby girl, and good girls shall be rewarded," Y/N eagerly nodded, willing to take whatever it is Jungkook's going to give her. She didnt know how did she become this pathetic, this desperate for a man's touch. But this is not just any man, this is Jeon Jungkook, and she is willing to do anything to feel his skin on hers.

"Get on all fours," Y/N quickly scrambled to get into position on the couch, her ass and pussy spread wide for Jungkook to see in that position. He lightly grazed her plush ass, giving it a kiss. "So soft, so beautiful, all mine, right?" Y/N nodded without a doubt, looking over her shoulders to see Jungkook pumping his already very hard cock, pre cum leaking from the tip. The sight make her even wetter, if that is even possible. He grazed the head of his cock around her drenched pussy, collecting all her wetness and slap her clit a few times with his cock. The sensation felt so good, Y/N almost felt like cumming right then and there.

"D-daddy, please," she keeps on begging, but he ignores her, continuing to tease her sopping pussy.

"Beg for dadd baby girl,"

"D-daddy please. I- want more,"

He finally have mercy on her and lined his cock to her entrance sliding in the head, fucking her shallowly.

"Do you think you deserve more? You think you deserve Daddy's cock tonight?" He lands another slap on her ass making her moan.

"Y-yes D-daddy. I've been good,"

"Hmm," he keeps on thrusting slowly, watching only the tip slides in and out of her. "You are right. You have been a good girl, and daddy promises good firls shall be rewarded," and slides himself fully in her. Y/N let out a loud moan at the sensation of him filling her up and Jungkook needs a minute to adjust himself as her tight walls starts to envelope him. "Fuck baby girl, you are so tight. You havent been fuck for a long time didnt you? Daddy is sorry he left you for so long baby girl. But Daddy will take care of you now," and with that he starts to thurst harder and harder, hands pressing on her back, burying her face in the couch. It didnt take long for the both of them to reached their peak, screaming each other's name as their explosive orgasm crashed through.

Jungkook and Y/N lay beside each other, panting. Jungkook kissed her sweaty forehead, a move that didnt go unnoticed by Y/N, making her feel like crying again. She wrapped the blanket around herself and finds the courage to open her mouth, to find the truth she has been seeking for.

"Wh-where did you go for the last three weeks?"

"I just had some things to do that doesnt concerns you," his cold exterior came back, the smile quickly vanish from his face. Y/N gulped at his cold respond and decides to ask something else instead.

"W-why did you bring those girls here?" Her voice small and anxious, afraid of what he might do or say. Jungkook immediately stood up and start to find his clothes. "Wait!" She panics. "Where are you going?"

"Just because I'm nice to you, you think you have the right to ask me questions? Who do you think you are? My girlfriend? You think you are special?!" He growled, hands stopping midway from buttoning his shirt, fuming with anger.

"N-no. But I thought-"

"Well, whatever you thought, you thought wrong!" He walks towards her, looming over her on the edge of the bed. "You are just one of the many girls that I fucked under a contract. For money. Dont even for a second think that you are special or different from any of them,"

"Jungkook, I just-"

"The fact that you actually agreed to this has already proof how you are just a shallow gold digger with no pride or self respect. Selling your body for money, and you thought I would see you as something special?" he lets out a sarcastic laugh. It hurts. His words hurts like crazy. Jungkook knows the reason why shes doing this. She told him during one of their late night talks. He also knows she never used his money more than what is necessary for her mother and her two siblings. She never asks for anything more from him. He knows all this but yet why is he saying all this things?

"Why are you even crying? Isnt what I said true?" He mocked.

"Why are you being like this?!" She screamed out. "This is not you. I know the real you Jungkook. You are not like this. Please, tell me whats wrong, I will help you go through it! But dont do this. Dont ruined what we had!"

"What we had? What the fuck are you talking about? You are delusional!"

"No Jungkook!" She cried out. "I know you felt it too!" Tears are already rolling down her cheeks. Who is she kidding? His word is more than just hurts her, it kills her. Jungkook scoffed.

"Just because we have a few talks you think you know me?" He lets out a dry laugh. "Everything I do is just a rust to get you into bed sweetheart," he smirked and carressed her cheeks, which is wet with tears.

"No. Th-thats not true. I know its not. Jungkook please,"

"I'm sorry you fell for it, but hey.. at least you get paid for it," he lets out a loud laugh, which sounds so evil, so sadistic to her ears.

"Why are you acting like this?" Y/N sobbed. "This is not you. This is not the Jungkook I fell in love with..."

Jungkook's eyes turned soft for a second, Y/N is sure she is not imagining it but it was gone in a matter of second, replaced by the cold hard glare.

"You love me?" He turns towards her and Y/N weakly nodded. No point of hiding that fact anymore. "Then, this arrangement is over sweetheart. Leave this apartment by tomorrow," he cupped her chin and looked into her eyes. Y/N stare into his brown doe eyes, hoping to find the Jungkook that she knows once again, but nothing. Only this monster remains. "Tsk, too bad. You are a good fuck too," was his last words before he walked out of the apartment, leaving Y/N crumpled alone on the floor.

/////

"I can obviously tell there's something bothering you," Taehyung walked into the large expensive mansion own by his childhood bestfriend, the most sought after billionaire Jeon Jungkook, careful not to step on the bottles of expensive wine, vodka and champange scattered on the floor. Taehyung lets out a small laugh at the sight of his friend in his silk custom robe, sprawled out on the large leather sofa. Even when he is getting shit drunk hes doing it with style and expensive alcohol.

Must be nice to be Jeon Jungkook.

"Go away Tae,"

"Sorry Kook. Not gonna happen," he flopped down beside the distressed man. "Whats going on? I have seen you went through hell and back and back again and never once were you like this. What could have happened that could make the mighty Jeon Jungkook holed up in his extremely expensive mansion?"

"I dont want to talk about it, go away Tae," he leans down to reached out to a half empty bottle of vodka but Taehyung snatched it away.

"Oh no no. Dont think you are getting off that easy. I'm not leaving until I get an answer and you know how persistance... and annoying I can be," he smirked. Jungkook sighed. Well, what Taehyung said is true. He is very, very annoying. Especially when he is trying to get what he wants. He wont stop until he succeeds. And right now he wants some answers from Jungkook. After much consideration and thinking, Jungkook accepted the fact that he has no choice if he wants Taehyung to leave. So he opens his mouth and start the to tell him the cause of the pain in his heart.

"Her name is Y/N..."

/////

"Well... I dont know what to say," Taehyung leans back into the couch after Jungkook finished off his story. So that's what it is. His friend is in love! Who would have thought. The news should have shocked Taehyung if he didnt know the sweet innocent Jungkook the boy used to be. The Jungkook that is capable of love and being loved. "What I dont understand is, why did you even say any of those things if you dont mean it?"

"I was scared okay? I have never, and I mean never felt like this before. The feeling of having someone actually cares for me, wanting to know me, worried about me. It feels strange Tae, but I- I like that feeling. The feeling of being loved," Jungkook sighed. "And that night... that night was the first time I kissed someone after a long time Tae. And it felt wonderful. It felt amazing. Its electrifying, it sends tingles through my whole body," Taehyung gaped at his friend. Is this really Jeon Jungkook? Talking to him about feelings?

"Everytime I look at her I feel like protecting her Tae. I want to give her everything that could make her happy. I hate to see her sad, even worse when she cries. It breaks my heart to see her in pain," he lowered his gaze to the floor.

"Tae?" Jungkook raised his head and finally looked into his friend's eyes after hours of swallowing in self pity. "Is this... is this what love feels like? Is this... is this what they called love?"

Taehyung chuckled out loud at Jungkook's question. His box smile showing. He finally see the innocent and adorable friend he met years ago when they were just little kids. The innocent and sweet boy, before life took a hard turn and change him into the cold wealthy man he is today.

"Yes Jungkook. It is safe to say that you are in love,"

/////

Jungkook stood outside the coffee shop, hands sweaty as he grip the bouquet of flowers in his hand. The cafe is filled with teenagers, college students mostly and he have never felt out of place. But if he wants Y/N back, then this is what he have to do.

"What are you afraid of? She herself told you she loves you and from the stories you told me about her, I dont think she's the type of person who change her heart so easily Kook. I'm pretty sure she still loves you. She just need to know that you love her,"

Well, at least that's what Taehyung told him. And up to that moment, Jungkook had believed that it might be true. But looking at Y/N expressionless place standing in front of him right now, he isnt so sure anymore.

Y/N cross her arms in front of her chest, foot tapping anxiously.

"What are you doing here Jungkook?"

"I-uh I came to see you,"

"Why?" Her cold respond makes him even more nervous than he already is. He have met thousands of the most important people in this world, but none had make him feel this nervous, small and insecure more than this simple girl in front of him.

"To... to say I'm sorry," Y/N raised an eyebrow. "I'm sorry Y/N. For everything," She kept quiet for a moment before finally nodded.

"Fine. I accept your apology," Jungkook's heart almost stop. Did she really just forgive him just like that? After everything he said and done to her? "So please, dont show your face to me ever again. I dont want to see you and remind me of the biggest mistake of my life," she added before turning away. Her words hits him like a blade, piercing his heart. Jungkook immediately reached out for her hand, halting her from proceeding back into the shop.

"No, Y/N wait. Please," he plead. "Can... can we start over? Please? I want to make it up to you. To make things right. Please Y/N," Y/N sighed and close her eyes, Jungkook can see traces of tears starts to pool at the corner of her eyes when she opened them, making his heart hurt even worse.

"Please just leave me alone Jungkook. Please,"

"No!" Jungkook is determined. He finally know what love felt like and he is not going to let it go so easily. "No. I wont stop until you give me a chance Y/N. I realized it now. I was stupid. I was scared of my own feelings, and I hurt you, just because I was afraid. Please Y/N," Y/N didnt say anything but shakes her hand loose from his hold, turning away to leave him.

"Y/N, I love you!"

His sudden confession managed to make her stop in her tracks, turning around slowly. Tears are now trailing down her cheeks.

"Dont Jungkook. Dont insult my feelings like this!"

"No Y/N," he reached forward and hold one of her hand. "I love you. I am so desperately, madly in love with you. I'm sorry I didnt realized it sooner, admit it sooner. I am so so sorry. Please Y/N. Please give me a chance," he plead, sniffling as he tries to hold back his tears.

"No," that one word broke Jungkook into pieces. "No. I cant do this. I'm sorry," was all she said before she pulled back her hand and ran away as fast as she could from him.

"I wont give up Y/N. I wont lose you. I just cant lose you," Jungkook softly whispered between his uncontainable tears, but theres nobody there to hear it.

Jungkook came to the coffee shop everyday since then. Y/N could have just ignored it, but of course, being Jeon Jungkook, he have to go the extra mile and actually bought the whole freaking coffee shop and made sure no one else is allowed to come in except him. He also made sure that Y/N work on most hours, givinf her extra pay, knowing she needed it.And he just sits there all day long, staring at her. Y/N wanted to quit, she really really want to but the money is good and she cant afford to lose a job right now.

Y/N finally had enough when the second week of just sitting at the counter and having Jungkook stares at her all day rolled by and walked up to him. Furious and frustrated

"Alright. What the hell do you want?!"

"One date. I want you to go on one date with me," Y/N ponders on his word. The request seems simple enough.

"Just one date and then you will leave me alone?" Jungkook nodded, eyes bright with hope.

"Fine. One date. And thats it,"

/////

The dreadful day of the date finally came and Y/N was awaken bright and early by her doorbell. A man dressed in a perfectly tailored suit stood outside her door, smiling.

"Uh yes?"

"Good morning Miss Y/N," he beams and hands her a huge box. "With compliments from Mr Jeon," Y/N was surprised. What is all this about. What is Jungkook doing now?

"Uh thanks... I guess?"

"I will make sure Mr Jeon receives your thanks. And he also sends this," he motioned for someone to come over and another man suddenly came into the picture, holding the most beautiful and biggest arrangment of roses she has ever seen. "500 roses, to cheer up your morning," the man smile. "Thats all Miss Y/N. May you have a great day," he bowed and left, leaving Y/N speechless.

She placed the heavy bouquet of flowers inside her living room, stunned for a moment and curiously open the first box she received. If the flowers surprised her, whats inside the box makes her jaw dropped. Inside is the most beautiful dress she has ever seen, with matching shoes and a clutch bag. She picked up the note attached on the box.

"Dear Y/N,

I tried to find something to match your beauty, but nothing could compare to you. I hope this dress would suffice. Please wear it for our date tonight.

Love, JJK

Y/N smile a little at the cheesiness of the note and picked up the dress. It was beautiful, no doubt, but is it enough to make her forgive Jeon Jungkook?

/////

Jungkook arrived exactly on time that night. Impeccably dressed in a tailored suit that makes him look extremely mouth watering. Not that Y/N would ever tell him that. He smile as he take her hand and lead her inside the limousine. Yes, he came with a freaking limousine.

"You look beautiful Y/N," he beams and Y/N just gave him a small smile back. Jungkook tried to gave her the perfect date. Flowers, champagne, chocolates, candle light dinner at a 6 star restaurant where he had closed down for the night just for them. He even took her on a carriage ride to the deck, where he lead her up to his private yatch, and watch a huge firework show that he planned just for her. Everything was perfect, beautiful, just like in the movies, but everything seems so wrong. Is Jungkook really not the man she thought he is?

"Y/N? Are you not enjoying the date?" Jungkook asks, realizing her silence, brows furrowed with worry as they sit in the limo after coming down from the yatch. "Is there anything else I can do? Do you want a trip to Paris to see the Eiffel Tower? Or a romantic night in Venice? I could call my private jet and we could go right now. Tell me Y/N. I will give you anything you want. Please,"

"Just stop Jungkook. This isnt working. You are not the man I thought you are. The man that I fall in love with..."

"Wh-what do you mean?" Jungkook kneels down and hold her hands. "Show me Y/N. Show me how to be that man," Y/N ponders for a moment and a smile finally graced her lips.

"Stop the car," she said and took Jungkook's hands, leading him out.

"Where are we going?"

"I am going to show you the part of you that I fell in love with. The real you,"

"Are you having fun?"

"Oh my god. Yes! And can we please get another one of those cotton candy?" Y/N laughs at his request and nodded.

"Of course,"

Y/N had taken him, the most sought after billionaire in the world to a carnival slash arcade at the countryside. At first confuse, Jungkook is now enjoying every little thing there is to do at the place, laughing like little children as they tried each and every game. Exhausted after a whole night of laughing, they are now currenly sitting at a lake side, sitting on a grass eating take outs from McDonalds.

"I brought you to a 6 star restaurant and you barely touch your food, but you finished two burgers from McDonalds?" Jungkook glares at her.

"What can I say? I'm just a simple girl who enjoys simple things. Not firework watching on a private yatch and a Michellin star 6 course dinner Jungkook,"

Jungkook's eyes soften. "I'm sorry Y/N. For tonight," he sighed. "For everything..."

"Its okay," Y/N raised her head to look at him. "I just want you to see that you are so much more than your money. That I enjoyed our time together the best when we are doing things like this. Not everything is about your money Jungkook. And not everyone is all aboit your money too. You have so much quality to offer that makes you a great person. Qualities that make me fall in love with you," she averted her eyes. "I know that night... when you said those things to me... that wasnt you. The real you is the man whose eyes lights up when he talks to me about his dreams to become a musician, when he talks about his love for Iron Man," she chuckled, "That man... he is the real Jeon Jungkook. So... I forgive you Jungkook. For real,"

Jungkook's eyes brighten at her words, his bunny smile showing.

"But I also know that girls like me is not someone like you will look for and I'm okay with that. So Jungkook, thank you for tonight. Thank you for giving me one last chance to spend my time with the real you," she smile and was about to stand up and leave but Jungkook pulls her back down, his hand grasping hers tight.

"This is what I'm talking about Y/N. This is what makes it so difficult,"

"What do you mean?" Y/N looks at him confused.

"You were right. Girls like you are not suitable for me," Y/N nodded softly, eyes turning sad, but Jungkook cupped her chin and make her look straight into his eyes."Girls like you dont see me as just a meal ticket, a piece of meat. Girls like you take your time to see who I really am, to see the real me underneath all these cold and expensive masks I tried so hard to put on. Girls like you get to know me the way I dont even know myself. Girls like you... makes me realized there are people who actually cared about me. For the real me. Girls like you makes me smile during times I dont remember how to. Girls like you makes me forget the troubles that I have just by being next to me. Girls like you makes my heart beats faster just from the way they look at me. Girls like you makes me want to hurt everyone who ever make them cry. Girls like you makes me want to protect them, to care for them, to be there for them. Girls like you... makes me fall in love," Y/N was shocked. Is Jeon Jungkook trying to say he has fallen in love? It cant be real. It just cant.

"But..." his eyes dropped low, sadness shone in them although his hand never leaving hers. "Girls like you are sweet. They are pure and innocent. Girls like you are not meant to be in my world. My dirty, broken, damaged, world. Girls like you... guys like me... we dont deserve them. But Y/N," he lifted his head up and looks back into her eyes. "I'm a selfish man, I want something that I know I dont deserve and I am willing to give up everything for it," he peered into her already teary eyes.

"Is it okay Y/N? Is it okay for me to love a girl like you? To love... you?"

"J-Jungkook..." Her tears are already falling down her face with no intention to stop. Never had she imagined that he would say those words to her. Love. Jeon Jungkook loves her.

"Y/N?"

"Yes. Yes Jungkook," she smile between her tears, making Jungkook's heart beats like crazy at how beautiful she looks.

"I love you so much L/N Y/N. So so much. Thank you for loving me and showing me what love really is," he cupped her face softly and slowly leaned in to give the softest kiss she has ever received, filled with longing, hope and most of all, love.

Never in a million years would she have thought that a simple ordinary girl like her can make the Jeon Jungkook fall in love. But it turns out, girls like her is exactly what a boy like him needed.

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