#i knew ot then i know it now im a giant worthless piece of shit and i fucked up so bad

[sadisticmystical]

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#i made a very big mistake #very very big #while being a drunken idiot #ive fucked up so many times while drunk i should have never taken anyones word for ot that i could get better after the first one #i knew ot then i know it now im a giant worthless piece of shit and i fucked up so bad #and im so grateful it wasnt worse #every single person there should literally never talj to me again i would understand i deserve it #ill never drink again ill never do any of this over again i promise please can i still be saved #i know i cant and im so sorry i thought i could im so stipid and so selfish for ever thinking i could just be around other people with no #consequences i knew i was fucked i knew it but i thought i could get better if i tried and tried and tried my hardest #i know now i know now please i cant be in this state of pretending everything is fine i know i ruined it please just #just tell me what would be enough to fix it #twll if nothing is enough to fix it #i can never drink again i can never speak to you again i can pay for it all i can hurt myself so bad ill never forget it ill do whatever #it is you ask just please ask and stop pretending its okay its not okay im so sorry i cant do this