#i actually made this in sept/oct and have held it close to my heart since and now u all can have it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fantasticwolfpenguin · 3 years

Text

Short and Sweet: An Introduction/Letter

Getty/Kevin Mazur. Sag awards 2018

This is a letter I wrote and posted on LinkedIn (on October 21, 2020) of all things just to see if anything happened. Nothing much happened so I'm reposting it here. I am techinically working on two papers related to this, one on his stage plays and the other one which this is suppose to be an intro to.

A short letter putting into context my thoughts about Chadwick Boseman. This is also a sample introduction to a larger paper I am working on. (~5 min read)

On September 1st, 2020, Michael B. Jordan’s Instagram posted some messages as well as photos about Chadwick Boseman’s death. One of the quotes that was repeated was “I wish I had more time”. Prompting to remember these lines in the Disney’s “Hamilton”, in “Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story” and I also distinctly remember one of the important lines of the musical: “Legacy. What is legacy? It’s planting seeds in a garden you never get to see” from “The World Was Wide Enough”. Other than being devout Christians, I think the similarities between Hamilton and Chadwick Boseman ends in this musical written by Lin Manuel Miranda or does it? I do have some nice pictures in my mind of Black Panther standing on the rotating stage and Killmonger reading those lines though.

As my last year of undergraduate courses, I have spent the beginning of the semester planning to write more. I decided to write this in an attempt to dodge the heavy responsibilities of knowing I have a Physics discussion worksheet due in a couple hours. I am an entomology undergraduate student, writing biographies is not my forte. I just wanted to see how long I could go with research about a Christian man I don’t even know. That’s enough about me.

It’s only been about a week and a half since his shocking death on August 28th, 2020 and I have been up some nights just trying to figure out how to start this. Do we start from when he was a major success and became a household name? Or do we start from his first role which subsequently got replaced because he was a teenager that complained about the lack of diversity in Hollywood? I thought about late 2019 to the beginning of 2020, where the cancer became visual. The posts and videos of people mocking him for his looks.

“The internet is forever” (as is Wakanda) as they say especially for a celebrity who is not entitled to let you know everything in their private lives. I did not have an Instagram, but I remember some snippets of news, and maybe I did agree back then he did look unfamiliar and thinner. What people don’t often remember was the context of the video, which has since been reuploaded onto YouTube. It was a message about supporting frontline workers, but ultimately. His second to last public appearance was after the death of Kobe Bryant as a guest star of The Shop presumably filmed some time in February 2020. What happens between those appearances is too striking. It makes me wonder further those following months that led to the end of August must have been heartbreaking. Yet instead of focusing on his message, the internet decided to talk about how frail he looked and presumably how he would continue his role as a Marvel superhero. This resulted in some cyberbullying and which leads me to my next point because of these reactions, what happens between April - August are a direct result of this. Barely anything is known and cutting a man’s pride resulted in people like me wondering things.

As nobody except a few people on this planet could even answer my questions, my curiosity continues to grow. What essentially, I want to answer is things the dear reader cannot like, what or if he ever wrote before his passing. I think we do not deserve those parting words and maybe that’s why I am writing this. It haunts me deeply that the actions of others lead to a selfless man to close off. I would say this is more of a work of faith wondering more about and what this journey would take me. It seems like his Instagram was the main source of things showing strong support of BLM and frontline workers. This makes the impact of the post made August 28th more shocking. If I am lucky, I want to actually ask questions and record answers to those who knew him, but this is truly a blind pursuit. Though when it is now socially acceptable to conduct everything through technology, who knows what happens.

I will try to summarize some main points known about Chadwick’s life and career. The other parts of this biographical essay will be about choices he made in characters seem more death oriented after assumed diagnosis in 2016. This paper was to look deeper into some feelings I had about the importance of a select number of his roles. In my hopes that there would be more aspiring young people who could look further past the check and into the impact they give to others.

-Sept. 7th, 2020

As someone that countless people look up to, his death came as a shock to millions. This is because Chadwick Boseman tried to give as much as himself to others every day. What you have just read were my feelings put into words, about a week after his death. I am currently planning to put something larger together, but it is akin to having a puzzle dipped in hues of purple, gold, and black, but the backing is missing in a sense. Although some of the backing may be missing, but I understand that the people who have it need it at the moment. They should keep it as long as they like, but if I had the backing it would certainly satiate my curiosity. I imagine the backing is not made of cheap cardboard, but careful layers of silk, warming the minds and hearts on whoever gleams upon it. I would say the backing is in less pieces than I initially thought and is held by the few people. This is mostly because in life, he kept to his tight knit circle. My hope in writing this is that one day, I could see the other things he was capable of: the writing, the singing, and the art more profound than we already have. In a way, my start is having to stay with what others have written such as the recent articles written after his death.

Afterall, he was an important part of the black community whether or not people knew him personally. Even if unable to see it in his lifetime, the dream of a society where spirituality, diversity, and technology fulfilled the needs of disenfranchised people. That dream is important to me as well and adds to the reasoning of me writing other than catharsis. The choices in roles he made, and career were also a direct result of this worldview that connects to the possible goals of this country. This hypothetical paper will be the big shiny puzzle put together as well as I could. The reader is to find some pieces missing, it may be entirely of my fault, yet there is so much, maybe it is worth searching for. If anyone would like to help me with this endeavor or would like to talk to me about this, let me know, I still am collecting my thoughts and have many notes and thank you for taking your time to read this.

Sources

Jordan, Michael B. “I’ve been trying to find the words…” Sept. 1st. 2020. Instagram. https://www.instagram.com/p/CEkpoYcgi43/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link Accessed Oct. 17th. 2020.

#chadwick boseman #michael b jordan #my writing #black panther #thoughts

13 notes · View notes

ladyxxdaydream · 3 years

Text

a year-in-review meme - for writers!

I thought up this writing meme for fic writers who might have been staring at the artists having their lovely and well-deserved collages of their work through the year - and wanted to join in the fun! also this works as a great reminder for those of you (and me) who’ve been thinking that they haven’t been writing as much as they want to, and allows you to go back to enjoy your old fic ;D

Rules: pick your favourite sentence from a work you posted / wrote during a month of 2020! if you didn’t write anything in any particular month, don’t worry! tell us what you were doing or use it as free space for runner-up sentences. after that, tag 8 people or more to do the meme!

That being said, here’s mine:

Tagged by: @rikacain !!

I’m tagging -- @flailinginlove @aviss @kiitsvne @stupidbadgers and @tea-blitz who doesn’t use tumblr anymore but WHATEVER. and anyone else who wants to do it! <3

~~~

JAN: (from Heavy Weight)

“Iruka felt Kakashi’s eye on him. Most people feared the Sharingan, and for good reason, but Iruka feared his real eye, his own eye. It had a way of seeing straight past Iruka’s defenses, no dōjutsu required, and deep into his soul.“

FEB: (from Old Pine)

“Do you want children?” Iruka asked, feeling like the timing was right.

Kakashi was quiet for a few moments. Iruka had learned to read Kakashi’s silences for what they were. It wasn’t hesitation like he had initially thought. Kakashi simply liked to think things through before answering immediately. Iruka liked that about him.

“I think we have four already,” Kakashi said, eyeing Sasuke, Naruto, Ino, and Sakura through the glass door.

Iruka laughed, but refrained from clarifying. He knew Kakashi understood what he meant and would answer him shortly. Iruka had also learned that Kakashi had a tendency to be indirect, before he got around to what he actually wanted to say.

MARCH: (from Mouthful)

“So, Kakashi.” Iruka said, unable to stand still any longer. “We both like what we see. Now what?”

He wasn’t usually this forward, but he was feeling it tonight. All of this playful banter was riling him up—it was his favorite way to flirt.

“I like a man whose direct,” Kakashi said, shifting his stance to lean an elbow on the table. “But hmm,” he hummed. “I don’t know.”

He gave Iruka a seemingly bored look, as if the obvious invitation to leave together was lost on him.

“Well, I like a man whose decisive, so I guess that rules you out.”

Kakashi let out a hard, surprised laugh. He downed the rest of his beer, and took Iruka by the hand, pulling him out of the bar without a word.

APRIL: (from A New Chapter)

“I don’t know how to put this,” Sakumo started, “but… what the hell is that?”

Kakashi looked at where his Father was pointing.

“Uh… a diaper…?” Kakashi guessed, not sure where this was going. They had about a million others, in every color and pattern you could imagine, folded and stacked in the closet. Iruka wanted to go the re-usable route, and several of his students mother’s were eager to gift them. Kakashi had been less than thrilled by the extra laundry.

“Yes. It’s a diaper, Kakashi. Very good. Tell me, did you have both eyes closed when you put it on?”

MAY: (From Cake Substitution No Jutsu)

“What’s this?” Iruka asked as Kakashi entered the kitchen, a fully dressed Tomo whizzing past them both.

“Ah, it’s a backpack,” Kakashi said, crossing over to Iruka excitedly. “I saw it on display in a shop window while doing Gai’s scavenger hunt. Its arms and legs are the straps, so when you wear it, it looks like it’s riding on your back.”

Iruka smiled, turning it around in his hands, noticing the zipper and a few pockets.

“That’s actually pretty ador—”

Iruka stopped speaking. The tail was tightly curled up inside plastic casing still.

“Kakashi,” Iruka said, feeling his eyebrow twitch. “Is this… is this a leash?”

“No. It’s a Puppy Pal… with an exceptionally long tail.”

“It’s a leash,” Iruka deadpanned. “A leash for a child.”

“You put Tomo inside a barrier the other day as a playpen,” Kakashi said, a matter of factly. “Why can’t I have some help controlling her?”

“That’s… that’s different!” Iruka exclaimed, feeling his cheeks heat in contradiction. “Would you like it if I put you on a leash, Kakashi?”

Iruka regretted it the second it came out of his mouth. He could practically see the wolfish grin forming beneath Kakashi’s mask.

JUNE: (from Use Your Imagination)

They laid in silence for a while, listening to the sounds of the night through the cracked window—distant cars on the street, a lone dog barking, upbeat music wafting from a floor below them.

Kakashi never wished for time to stop. In fact, he tried to keep himself as busy as possible—he chose a career that ate up most of his life for a reason. But right now? He wished time didn’t exist, hyperaware of how quickly it would pass before Iruka was back on a plane tomorrow.

He traced circles into Iruka’s lower back, watching as the brown skin pressed against his broke out in a wave of goosebumps. Iruka shivered, and then shifted, and Kakashi wondered if he was falling asleep.

He selfishly continued his adorations, wanting to keep Iruka in this realm with him for a little while longer. He expanded his rake, sliding his fingers up Iruka’s spine, skirting around his scar, and back down again.

Kakashi wasn’t one to believe in divine intervention, or soulmates. He’d acted in enough corny films to almost make him hate the notion entirely. But the fact that a man as perfect as Iruka had come into his life so serendipitously—and just as scarred as he was—was something he couldn’t overlook.

It made Kakashi’s heart ache with want, before that ache traveled down, and curled into his gut.

JULY: (from Love Me As You Are)

“And then you demeaned their lives by calling them your soldiers—”

“—is that not what they are?!” Kakashi cut across him, getting upset. “You’re as much a part of this system as I am, sensei! We both know the truth of it, whether we like it or not. I just called it by it’s name.”

“But they’re people too, Kakashi! Kids. They’re so much more than soldiers…”

“That’s not how I was treated,” Kakashi said before he could catch himself.

Iruka’s mouth fell open with a punched sound.

“Kakashi…”

His tone was soft and free of the anger it held a moment ago.

“Forget I said that,” Kakashi said, turning away, his cheeks heating up—the last thing he wanted was Iruka’s pity. “It doesn’t matter.”

“No,” Iruka said, shaking his head as he took a step towards him. “I’m not going to forget you said that. It does matter because you matter. You deserved to have somebody stand up for you too, Kakashi. I’m so sorry Konoha failed you.”

Kakashi’s eyes burned with tears—he bit his tongue, refusing to let them fall. Those words pierced him straight through the heart. It was everything he never knew he needed to hear.

AUG:

um I didn’t write anything this month because my wife and I separated annnd my whole life was uprooted as I moved to a different country ksjdhgkdsj

SEPT: (from I’ll Fall, If You Do)

Their relationship was going really well. There were days where Kakashi still turned him away, usually corresponding with the mornings he had therapy. It was frustrating, because Iruka just wanted to be there for him, for Kakashi to open up to him completely, but he didn’t push. He knew that would only make it worse. They didn’t fight anymore, but Iruka regularly had to correct the language Kakashi used towards himself, and sometimes it was irritating for the both of them.

But mostly… it was amazing. Their chemistry was incredible. Electric. And not just in the bedroom—they were never far from each other, drawn in like magnets, grounded by a simple touch or brush of hands. Kakashi hadn’t even left the room twenty minutes ago, and already Iruka felt the pull.

He jumped up from his seat and went to go find him.

OCT: (From Language Gap)

Iruka glanced out the bus window, his body instinctively knowing where they were about to pass. The building was still empty twenty years later, the brick still scorched, and Iruka’s nightmares were still plagued by the fire despite not being there when it broke out. He’d been sent on a delivery on foot — one steaming container of karē udon — two blocks away. He delivered to the same old lady everyday, and she always kept him longer than necessary, pressing sweets into his palm. When he had come back, the noodle shop was aflame. In his shocked state, he distantly heard something about a grease fire, before he was whisked away by the hand by his childhood friend Asuma, living with him and his father from that day on.

Iruka sighed and stood up, making his way towards the door since his stop was next. He really wished the city would do something about the building. Every time he saw it, it made him feel oddly exposed and vulnerable, like his past was staring straight at him.

He shook his head a little and stepped off the bus.

NOV: (From Brand New Sound)

Kakashi watched in stunned silence for a moment, trying to get his heartbeat under control as color effortlessly flowed from the artist’s hand onto the brick. Whoever this was, they had sort of become one of Kakashi’s heroes. People always said meeting your heroes was never a good idea—bound to be disappointing—because it brought them down to a human level.

But that was precisely what attracted Kakashi to this artist in the first place—the sheer, raw, humanness. The way they tackled hard emotions and vulnerability, baring everything through their work for others to see. It was honest and transformative, and Kakashi spent more nights than he could ever count wandering the streets when he couldn’t sleep, hoping to catch a mural he’d never seen before it was painted over. Sometimes he did, and sometimes he’d sit in front of ones he already knew and found new meaning in them.

DEC: (from Perks of Promotion)

“But why now?” Iruka insisted. “Why ask me out now? Right after I’ve made tokubetsu jounin? When we’ve known each other for years?”

Oh.

Kakashi paused, the realization dawning on him. He didn’t blame Iruka for being suspicious of his intentions; he’d heard the way people said ‘the chuunin sensei’ or ‘the chuunin desk worker’ like it was some kind of insult. It always pissed him off.

Kakashi stared at his feet for a moment before lifting his head again, leveling Iruka with a serious stare. “Because I didn't think I’d live past 21. Because it took me an obscenely long time to become a barely functioning adult. Because I never had the guts before… I-I still don’t, not really, if you can’t tell by how much I’m fumbling around here,” he said with a nervous laugh.

#kakairu #my fic #hatake kakashi/umino iruka #this is VERY long #i dont expect ppl to read it lmao #but it was really fun #*sweats* yeah i picked one sentence.....#also WOW #i published something every month (sometimes twice!!)#except for august #which is... understandable #this was a really cool idea #thanks for tagging me rika :D #writer meme

28 notes · View notes