#hopefully this isn’t terrible ig

[estrellami-1]

Ten Minutes

Didn’t love this when I first wrote it. Left it in my drafts for a LONG freakin’ time. Found it again and no longer care, so here yall go; have fun! Probably not a part 2 to this one.

Steve takes a breath, then another, as he waits for the line to connect. He grits his teeth, feeling eyes on him. He does his best to ignore them.

“Munson residence, if you’re calling about the murders I’ve been absolved of, try going to hell instead.”

“I need you to pick me up.”

A pause. “Stevie?”

Steve takes another breath. Tries to unclench his jaw. “Please.”

“Yeah, of course, I’ll be right there- what-”

“My parents are in town.”

Another pause. “I’ll be there in ten. Try not to kill them.”

Steve laughs humorlessly. “Just hurry.”

“Ten minutes,” Eddie says, and hangs up.

Steve sighs, places the phone in its socket, and turns back to face his parents.

His mother is narrowing her eyes at him. “Who was that?”

“A friend,” he says lightly.

“Who, that Hagan boy?” His father scoffs.

“No. Not Tommy. I haven’t spoken to him in years.”

“Oh, Steve,” his mother tuts. “Always so dramatic. We’ve not even been gone a year-”

Steve laughs. It sounds hollow. “Try four years,” he informs her. “And three concussions. Did you hear about the mall two years ago? Or the boy who went missing four years ago?” He shakes his head when his mother looks at him blankly. “That’s what I thought.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” his father snaps. “And don’t you dare speak to your mother in that tone again, Steven. You’re still a child and I won’t hesitate to reprimand you as such.”

“I’m twenty,” Steve says evenly. “I’ll be twenty-one in five months.” He crosses his arms. “The last time you saw me, I was a freshman in high school. I’ve graduated. I found jobs. Lost some friends and made some better ones.”

“And what of that girl you were dancing around?” His mother asks. “Karen’s daughter?”

“We’re friends,” he says shortly, then moves through the kitchen, to the stairs. “Excuse me.”

“No,” his father says. “You’re not excused. Where do you think you’re going?”

Steve turns, one hand on the bannister, to look at the man who had terrified him the last time he’d seen him. It’s funny what interdimensional threats will do. “To pack a bag. I’m not going to stay here while you are.”

“And if I were to say we’re staying for good?”

Steve laughs. “Dad, you’ve said that before. Multiple times, actually. Those words mean nothing to me anymore.”

“And where are you planning on staying?” His mother asks. “Honestly, Steven, I thought we raised you to make better decisions than this.”

“Oh, I see. So it was raising me when I woke up at nine years old to discover you’d left and I’d have to find my own way to school. Then a week later when I had to ride my bike to the store to buy groceries. At eleven, when I looked the school counselor in the eye and said you’d be back soon. I had to go to my own parent-teacher conferences. At fifteen, trying to figure out high school classes. At seventeen when I got my first concussion. At eighteen when I signed my first legally-binding NDA. You hadn’t abandoned me. You were raising me.” He sighs, shakes his head. “Forgive me if I don’t believe you.”

He makes his way up to his room and packs as much as he can. Clothes. Vinyls. The box of cash under the loose floorboard. Then into the bathroom. Toothbrush, deodorant, even his shampoo. Doubles back into his room to grab a bracelet off his nightstand; one El made him.

He looks around, grabs the nail bat, and makes his way downstairs. His mother gasps when she sees him. “What on earth is that?”

He looks at the bat. Adjusts his grip, twirls it around. “An NDA.”

The doorbell rings. Steve grabs his bags and moves towards it. “If you walk out that door, you’ll never walk back in.”

“Fine by me,” Steve says. He grabs his keys, tosses the house key at his father, and pockets the rest.

He opens the door and grins at Eddie, who’s looking at him worriedly. “Hey, Eds. Ready to go?”

Eddie blinks. “Um. Sure? Are you okay?”

“Sure,” Steve shrugs. “I’m getting kicked out. If you don’t want to take me I’ll just go bug Robin. It’ll only be for a little while, though, just until I find a better job and an apartment or something.”

“Like hell Wayne’s gonna miss this chance,” Eddie grins. “You know you’re his favorite.”

Steve smiles back, tosses his things into the back of Eddie’s van. “I hoped you were gonna say that.”

Permanent Taglist: @justforthedead89 @ilovecupcakesandtea @madigoround @bookbinderbitch @suddenlyinlove @nburkhardt @artiststarme @paintsplatteredandimperfect @i-less-than-three-you @alyelf @quarble @messrs-weasley @littlewildflowerkitten @vankaar @starman-jpg @bornonthesavage @steddie-there @goodolefashionedloverboi @andienotannie @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @platinum-sunset @just-ladyme @steddiestains @swimmingbirdrunningrock @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @martinskis-lydias @notaqueenakhaleesi @sleepyboosstuff @bestwifehaver @m-owo-n @thatonebadideapanda @finalmoondragon @velocitytimes2 @callmeanythjing @ajeff855 @ilikeititspretty @knitsforthetrail @sillysparrow @that-one-corvid @ace-is-bored @muricel @harpymoth @weirdandabsurd42

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #idk if it’s clear or not but Steve and Eddie ARE dating in this one!! #getting kicked out #Steve Harrington has shit parents #hopefully this isn’t terrible ig #starambles

[saintobio]

man thank you so much for the new chapter! I was shaking throughout it the whole time seriously and I need to vent about this topic a little.

the thought of gojohime feels so wrong. the fact that that is your best friend's ex with whom she has a child with? going after that? the fact that that is your ex whom you got a son with's best friend? going after her? it's so fucking wrong. I really can't stomach the thought because I got experience with it (yup 😒) and because I think the best way for Satoru and YN to heal is to never have anything to do with each other at all except their son. if Utahime was a character that was completely separated from all the others, as in no connection to anyone, then I would have been fine with it. but since she's so intertwined with YN I find it so wrong for her to be with Gojo. it really leaves me with such a terrible taste in my mouth. reminds me of too many bad things :( but I respect your decision of course, I just wanted to get this off my chest a little ♥️ thank you for the chapter !

Anonymous said

I get why people are more critical of utahime and gojo then toji and yn.

Utahime and yn are friends and business partners.

Gojo and toji are business rivals.

Gojohime feels like a double betrayal because of the friendship and and it being a gojo x yn fic and you know what i fucking hate gojo and yn together but yn went through so much shit because of gojo that it would be a loss if gojo and yn aren't together.

What's better or worse? To take back the ex that insulted and cheated on you or have that ex move on making you feel like stepping stone for them to be a better person.

Utahime should maybe thank yn if gojohime is endgame that gojo used yn as a training dummy to be a better partner for her.🤣

Anonymous said

maybe it’s petty, but i hope gojohime isn’t endgame. like, after watching euphoria w the whole maddy cassie nate situation, i just can’t stomach the idea of dating a friend’s ex, especially one who didn’t treat them right. i’m glad that utahime can be there for him as a friend which he totally needs, but like… she’s y/n’s friend? it’s so heartbreaking to see how y/n basically has nobody (except Ian and Sachi) on her side and supporting her through her decisions. i’m contrast to gojo, she has so many people telling her that her feelings and actions are ridiculous and invalid. i normally like gen, but her talking to y/n like that this chapter was so unnecessary. ig she’s more of the confrontational than understanding type. as far as endgame for y/n i really don’t care who she ends up with, as long as she and sachi can finally find some sort of peace and happiness. that’s all i want for them. anyway this was a great chapter, and please don’t ever feel rushed to make new chapters, we’ll be here either way. take care saint!!

Anonymous said

god.. honestly i feel so bad for mc! She doesn’t deserve this at all😩 imagine having the whole world antagonize you & your best friend getting chummy with your ex husband that causes your whole trauma. i don’t really care about who she endep up with, i just really want her to finally gain some peach in her life🥺

Anonymous said

Utahime come on hold on for the ladies 😭 resist that stinky man!!!! Bros over hoes!!!!

Anonymous said

hi saint! i hope you’re doing well, sy6 was amazing, and as much as i thought i would be super jealous about utahime’s friendship (or whatever it will become😟) with satoru (which i am a tiny bit cause wtf hime) i just feel like not being jealous about it will soothe the pain as the rest of the chapters come out :,) it’s kind of giving cassie calming herself down in the bathroom after crying and faking a smile in the mirror in s2… lol

hopefully utahime won’t be in her cassie era tho. i just can’t trust her after seeing u say that sy7 will break hearts ahhh. also i’m not ashamed to admit i also believe in gojoxyn endgame supremacy (even tho it’s not looking so good rn) but if we’re being realistic relationships love and marriage take time and as much as yn and satoru keep hurting each other; they just can’t seem to truly leave each other alone, even if it’s just coincidence that they are just always in each other’s vicinity, or at least that’s what i think and i could also be completely wrong, and the reason for that is simply just sachiro. but i also do love the angst i just have no idea if i will be ready for it

it also hurts seeing that document that satoru wrote… i feel like when he remembered that scene, he completely forgot about everything else and didn’t really think about the reasoning for why yn would hide sachi. and i’ll admit when you look at the situation especially after the way satoru worded it “she made me think my child was dead” it is a little wrong but i love my girl yn and i’m standing with her 😩

one last thing, i also can see that yn truly doesn’t want to be alone, everyone is making her out to seem the bad person bc of her mistakes but nobody wants to listen to her and i was rly hoping toji would this time around but i like that toji and gen are the two people who keep it totally real with her, it just hurts cause i love toji sm sigh

don’t think it’s necessary for me to speak more bc you guys are already good at writing down ur thoughts about certain situations/dynamics in the fic!! based on the sentiments abt gjhm, i’m just happy that i’m getting the reaction i wanted sdjsjs i guess people wouldn’t feel strongly about it if she wasn’t yn’s best friend, but she is, and that’s why it’s a heart wrenching sight for readers to see :)))

#🖤: letters to saint #series: sincerely yours

[dramioneasks]

do u have any fics/recs that d has a gun? or a story that has like ig gun violence? thank you!!

Ride or Die by olivieblake - E, 29 chapters - The Death Eaters are an outlaw motorcycle club run by Tom Riddle, a notoriously ruthless leader who works the brotherhood into high stakes criminal activity after the death of their previous president. Draco Malfoy is heir to the throne, but his life abruptly changes when fate lands him in the hands of a young doctor who is about to get in way over her head. Dramione, Muggle AU.

Dear Child By: JamesPotterwasntaseeker - M, 16 Chapters - Hermione felt her time was running the closer she got to thirty. She thought she would have been married and on her way to having a family, but she was nowhere close to that goal. So one little advertisement in the Daily Prophet would change her life.

Love In A Time Of The Zombie Apocalypse by rizzle - M, WIP - After Voldemort, there was this. The clock is ticking to create a cure to the unimaginable horror that currently grips the world. Hermione finds herself unwillingly allied with the most hated man in Wizarding Britain.

DIPLOMACY by elleconrad22 - E, WIP - "Her smile was as loaded as the gun in her garter" ------------------ Still reeling from the war, Hermione Granger joins the ministry with the hopes of making real change. Under Kingsley Shacklebolt's eye, she acts as an advisor to the International Confederation of Wizards. But there's growing concern of a new dark supremacist group rising in parts of Europe. After a string of attacks and threats to ICW officials, it's clear that action needs to be taken. Loosing hope, the British ministry turns to the one individual at their disposal with inside experience of such groups, Draco Malfoy, and assign him the task of becoming their Golden Girl's protection. Updates every other week, normally on a Sunday!

Cherchez La Femme by Felgia_Starr - M, 3 chapters - Draco attempts to move on after a terrible tragedy. He ignores his father’s letters from France and travels to the States. He claims he wants to start a new, normal life with a new, normal identity, far away from all the guns and gangs his father has put him in, so why does he choose to go to Chicago of all places?

Dust by In_Dreams - M, 9 chapters - Hermione has come to the town of Kingswood for a change of scenery, and hopefully, some easy money. But a notorious outlaw runs the crime scene in town, and he isn't interested in sharing. A Dramione Old Western AU.

- Lisa

Edit: Thanks!

tygermine: Draco has a gun in this one too: Carpe Piscis by tygermine https://archiveofourown.org/works/27606932

#tw: guns #tw: violence #mafia

[everything-laito]

hey,,, i've seen this controversial opinion about laito not being sexually assaulted by cordelia. . .as the only opinion of laito that matters, what are your thoughts on it? i know you've made some posts in the past about cordelia and laito's relationship, but i think that now would be a good time to i guess, remake a post or clarify your thoughts so people could follow along?? i hope you enjoy your day.

*proceeds to crack all my knuckles at once*

This isn't really my own "response" cuz oh boy I'm sick of this petty ass drama lmao. To begin, SKLDJF I'm very flattered that you hold my opinion in that high of regard! I'd say there's others that have interesting interpretations of him too though :) but again, thank you :') glad you enjoy what I have to say!

I know I've already kinda responded to this via a screenshot here, just to hold you––and others reading this––over. As much as this is a great time to talk about a how-to-analysis, I’ll still put that as a separate post eventually, but I still will go over the philosophy of truth and writings etc. But anyways, to answer your initial questions, they’re under the cut!

And no, I’m not specifically calling anyone out here. These are just issues with the fandom that I find as a whole, along with some extremists. Thus, I’m not going to be putting tags for people to easily find this post because I don’t want to be wound up in this drama––once again this is just more commentary on the fandom as a whole, which hopefully you can apply to people you find!

I have a lot of my own thoughts about Cordelia and Laito’s relationship here (just in case if people need it):

1. Goes over potential grooming of Laito, facts about Cordelia and what happened before she did stuff to Laito, and when did she rape Laito for the first time?

2. Stuff about incest and how any relationship out of a parental/child relationship is abuse even if it’s not penetrative sex, more incest stuff, and just more thoughts on their relationship

3. Neuroplasticity, trauma, Karlheinz, and isolation

4. What does sexual trauma look like? And some stuff on Laito’s facade

5. More stuff on his facade, and projection on Yui

6. My thoughts on Laito’s dark fate vampire ending + Conclusion

7. Answering some inbox stuff relating to Cordelia

Sure I realize I might be missing some stuff but that’s just my whole analysis on them. I’ll probably make some follow up posts eventually but I’m not sure when that will be.

But as for this analysis/ramble, I’ll divide it up into sections:

The issue of hypocrisy in the Dialovers fandom:

I- oh dear god. Ok, just saying, there’s a lot of people being like “oh I hate Cordelia because she was abusive” then ??? yo??? Why do you like the boys?? They’re abusive and we see more of them than Cordelia??? I just personally hate hypocrisy. However, it’s okay to hate Cordelia! It’s okay to love Cordelia! It’s okay to hate the boys and it’s okay to love the boys too. But recognizing that you don’t like one or the other just because “they’re abusive” is a fallacy at that point.

The reason why so many people hate Karlheinz/Cordelia/Beatrix/Christa/Richter (or at least start off hating them) is because they are written as the villains of the story! Karl’s the main villain, and the rest (including the diaboys and Yui) are kinda just tragically wound up in his plans. You sympathize more with the boys because you spend more time with them and watch them grow! It’s a whole “us vs them” situation. Since those people were awful to the boys/the boys hate them, you’re like “yeah they’re bad!” But the issue with the whole “us vs them” situation (as in real life) is that people tend to excuse the actions done by the “us” party.

Same thing goes with extreme Karl/Cordelia/Richter fans (I’ve never seen a hardcore Beatrix/Christa fan but they’re probably out there). Some hate the diaboys but love the people in that party. They’ve also done some shitty stuff too! Bro, even Yui has done some terrible stuff! But that’s because she was a product of the events she was thrown into––and same with everyone else.

Karl has been the mastermind of all this, and for me I don’t have any sympathy for him, mainly because we’re not shown anything to sympathize with (except that he just is tired of living but idk why he wants to create a whole new race like lmao science nerd ig, I feel that king). A lot of people like him for his looks, and I’m not saying that’s a bad thing––he’s a fictional character, objectify these characters however you want. This is more of a personal opinion of mine though. And maybe people do just sympathize with his outlook on life, that’s totally fine.

But since these characters are all attractive in their own regard, they all get the treatment of “pretty-boy” syndrome (Idek if that’s the exact name for it). Which is just the privilege pretty people get. But again, this is fictional, so it’s not necessarily important in this case. Bro I got into DL cuz of “ooga booga hot vampires” and stayed for the complex lore and characters (especially one complex character, wonder who that could be). I imagine most people got into DL because of that, or out of sheer curiosity.

Ok, I’m throwing out a lot of points but not really connecting them. Lemme give you an example: I don’t like Reiji. His character doesn’t vibe with me most of the time aside from the fact that he’s hilarious. But I just am very neutral/neutral-negative on his character. But I’m not like “oh cuz he’s mean/abusive” cuz LOL EVERYONES MEAN IN THIS GAME. Sure you can still say that, it’s just not a very strong claim. Hypocritical claims tend to be like that. Same with a lot of Yui haters. In this case, they’re more jealous that she’s there and not them, which I’ve explained a lot in this post about toxic femininity and Yui in the fandom etc. But it’s ok to just not like a character! It’s alright! I know someone who just doesn’t vibe with Subaru. She doesn’t know why, she just doesn’t vibe with him. There’s no need to defend it either. But the use of hypocrisy is my main issue, and I’ll get to that in the next section.

(There’s a really good post explaining this too but I cannot find it for the life of me. I think it was made by @/abottleofkarlheinz or @/the-madame21)

How opinions of fictional universes left unchecked can effect real life:

I’ve said this a little bit in that Dialover PSA post I’ve made about Yui that I linked a couple paragraphs ago. But the reasons why people say they hate Yui is concerning. If you don’t like Yui, that’s totally fine! Again you don’t need reasons to hate on a character or defend it. But if you do choose to defend those characters, make sure what you’re saying isn’t out of some other place in your heart. Let me explain.

In that “Yui PSA” post I made, I say how your attitudes in being critical of a fictional universe usually does reflect on who you are as a person, at least when you’re making certain claims. In that Yui post, I say that the hatred on Yui is a result of the “other girl” mentality. On top of that, it erases her experience as a survivor. Yes, this is a fictional character, but bringing that into real life can have some dire consequences if you don’t differentiate them. If you have the same attitude of Yui with other survivors if the “abuser is hot” then thaaaaaat’s so fucked up.

For example, there’s people who have crushes on real life serial killers! That- that’s absolutely disgusting! Those real people killed living people and effected so many lives and families. Dude I have fictional crushes on fictional serial killers, and that’s different, because it is a removed universe. It’s why I can still call myself a lesbian but still have crushes on fictional male characters, for a further example (and vice versa! I have straight friends who crush on fictional characters of their same gender! But that doesn’t make them any less straight. And no, I’m not erasing bi people here either, just clarifying in case if you needed that).

Not being able to differentiate your opinions of a fictional universe can get very toxic. Like I love Laito, but I’m not like “omg I wish he was real so he could do that stuff to me uwu” like no!!! UH!!! I wouldn’t want to date anyone like him in real life! That’s literal abuse! And if Laito was here in real life it’s not a controlled environment, he’d literally be able to do anything with you, etc. That’s what makes a fantasy, a fantasy. They’re controlled.

Also vice versa, some people get really triggered by Dialovers, specifically Laito’s route. A lot of non-consensual acts that he does have been experienced by people in real life in any extent, myself included. For me, it’s a personal escape from that, because it is an environment where I am prepared for those events and can control my exposure to it. For some, they are reminded of the reality they had to experience. Fictional universes are inspired by real life, no matter what way you look at it. Real life people are making it, after all.

I feel like I’m going in so many circles, but trust me, I’m getting to the point.

I- I can’t explain this enough but it is most definitely implied that Cordelia had raped and sexually abused Laito. If it was explicit, DL would be an 18+ game, but they cannot do that in Japan. I’m not going to like defend this point because so many people (myself included) have defended this point. It’s implications carry over into Laito’s character and why he’s like this. He’s a textbook sexual abuse survivor. I just,,,, cannot explain this enough. Same thing with overwriting the abuse of Yui. They get jealous of Yui. Sure I’d say a good chunk of people have ravishment fantasies here. At least the 18+ people in the fandom who are into that stuff. But oh my dear god, ravishment fantasies are super super dangerous to enact in real life. It’s possible to do them, but it would take years of building up to that point in kink. That’s a whole other discussion though and I’m not incredibly comfortable talking about it knowing that minors read my blog (I’ll also have to say here: no minors in kink--its alright to educate yourself but pleaaaaaaaaaase don’t enact on any of those activities until you are of age, and even so that still can be dangerous right as you turn 18).

But anyways, saying that Yui should enjoy this because she’s experienced the ravishment fantasy you’ve dreamed of? Oh fucking hell, if you leave that opinion and mentality unchecked and it goes into real life, that’s incredibly awful. Abuse apologists are absolutely terrible people, almost as much as the abusers themselves.

If you twist the narrative that Laito loves Cordelia or Yui loves the boys at the end of the first game, that’s still––ughhhhhhhh. Especially when it’s so obvious that Laito has so many mental issues with Cordelia. His whole monologue and breakdown at the end of Dark Fate definitely tells us that he has had such an issue with Cordelia. And MB+ Laito is still Laito. As for Yui, dude she literally goes through stockholm syndrome in the first game like it is so goddamn apparent idek how to explain this at this point.

Ok dear god lmao wow, uh I think that’s answering the first couple of questions?

The philosophy of truth:

“Truth” has been an incredibly debated topic in philosophy for years. Truth is more of a subjective item rather than objective. Sure you can have personal objective truths, but they may not be the same truths for others. For example, a tomato is red. However, that tomato is red to me, because I am not color blind. A red-green color blind person may see the tomato as being brown or more muted in color. That’s their truth. They can’t really imagine what red is (ok depending on severity of their color blindness), considering they have not experienced the color red in the same way people who don’t have color blindness do. God uh, here’s a whole ass essay about truth, I’m cherry picking some of the things in there that are relevant to this.

Basically what I’m saying is, truth is very subjective. However, there are philosophers arguing a more objective truth. But that’s a whole other discussion. Also, this isn’t to support any political opinion, but I can use that as an example. Let’s go for well... The death penalty. I’m in America, we have the death penalty in some states. Yes, this is a very controversial topic, and no I’m not arguing the ethics of it here. Just hear me out.

If you live in Europe for example (except in Belarus and Russia––ok when I looked it up they consider Russia in Europe and technically it is but also there’s the whole chunk that is not- lmao even the truth of geography can be subjective), you might be like “yeah what the fuck are Americans doing?” (a common sentiment that I also share lmao). But yeah, what the fuck are we doing? Why is the death penalty still in existence? Yes, there’s statistics that prove that it doesn’t deter crime, but even crime rates is caused by a lot of different things too. Even statistics aren’t always accurate, because of many different factors. They’re not objective either, although good statisticians try their best to get good results and not skew the data. (please try to see where your data is coming from and who it is sponsored by––it matters a TON)

I’d say the closest thing we have as an objective truth to argue the death penalty or not is money. Money, although the concept is subjective, is a very objective currency. It’s why artists hate “exposure” compared to “money” as sole currency. The death penalty is very expensive, and not even used that often.

So, although money is currency made by us, and is technically 75% linen and 25% cotton (in America at least) with some funky dudes n numbers printed on it, it doesn’t sound that special. However, it would be considered as a baseline of some type of “objective truth” in ~society~ because people are typically on the same page of what money’s worth. Even so, this baseline of truth is still subjective! If Bill Gates accidentally has a $20 bill fall out of his pocket, that’s nothing to him! But if someone who’s working very hard to make ends meet loses that same amount of money, it could deal a lot of financial damage to that person.

Ok, hopefully you guys kind of get my drift. There are a lot of theories of truth, I’m just explaining one (honestly I forget the name of this theory) because it is the closest to the types of truth we are dealing with. And in this case, it’s called “canon.”

What the fuck is analysis:

The concept of “canon” is the objective truth that we have when analyzing universes. They’re our bread and butter of interpretation and extrapolation. The art of analysis clings to this notion of an objective truth. It needs a baseline. I’m going off of Aristotle’s rhetorical triangle, because that type of analysis I have the most experience with.

This is called rhetorical analysis. Rhetoric is the use of words in a persuasive fashion, and the analysis part is a breakdown of how words are used in order to achieve persuasiveness. I don’t typically use a lot of explicit rhetorical analysis in my personal writings, but I guess a version of it. Which typically has to deal with intention and execution. A lot of analysis on language has to do with this. Language is incredibly subjective. Certain words carry individual meanings to people. I have gone over the difference between real and lexical definitions before, and I’ll do it again.

I’ll just copy and paste what I’ve said before here from this analysis:

To put it simply, lexical definitions are the definitions you find in the dictionary. This is an “official” and “agreed upon” definition. Real definitions (quite a misleading name in my opinion) is the definition that’s more kind of “felt” in a way and how you internally interpret the word in context (these can be through individuals or any niche group). What I mean by this is that when you say a word (for example) to convey a feeling, you usually won’t know the dictionary definition off the top of your head. You say that something’s “savage” for example when you want to describe something violent or gruesomely awesome (it depends if it’s in a slang context or not) but there’s many lexical definitions (and outdated lexical definitions) of the term. But the first definition that usually comes up is “adj (of an animal or force of nature) fierce, violent, and uncontrolled.”

But people typically don’t think of the lexical definition when they learn what a word means; they usually learn the context of it and apply it as such. And that’s what a “real” definition is. Laito has a differing definition of what affection and love is, and that’s his own meaning and what it means to him.

I’ll even add another example to that too. The word “cunt” in english refers to a vagina. That’s just it. It’s lexically synonymous with “vagina,” “pussy,” etc. However, “cunt” has a subjective meaning to it. This is where “real” definitions also come into play. Many people view the word as vulgar and dirty. And that’s cuz we live in a ~society~ lmao. Our use of language has shaped what this word means in a context outside of the dictionary. I’ll do you one more. The Japanese word マンコ (manko) is also vulgar slang that’s kind of like our word “cunt/pussy.” Sometimes I say “cunt” for jokes, but I don’t use it that often to begin with since it’s just a very strong word to most (albeit it’s not that strong of a word for me). However, マンコ is a strong word to many Japanese people, but if I hear it even though I’ve been learning Japanese, it doesn’t have that same effect as hearing “cunt” for me is (which still, idc if I really hear it depending on context) because I haven’t been shaped in a culture that uses Japanese.

Even so, tone, intention, and context is HUGE in this. If someone called me a “useless fucking cunt” when they’re angry at me, I’d be close to crying. If someone told that to me as a joke, I’d be like “lol yeah you right, bitchass” and if someone said that in a consensual sexual context, it would certainly tickle my masochistic heart.

DSLKFJ also sorry if you don’t like hearing that word, I just had to utilize a strong example for this. But anyways, now let’s change the lens to Dialovers.

No, it never explicitly says that Cordelia rapes Laito. It doesn’t. However, there’s this WACKY thing called being able to infer, reading between the lines, and identifying implications. Those are kind of all the same things. However, indirect exposition is used a lot in effective creative writing. The utilization of this type of exposition is more preferred when writing a story, because direct exposition is kind of referred to as “info-dumping” when used excessively. Forgive my jargon: this is just showing vs telling as we’re taught in every writing class. I’m personally very bad at it, which is why I stick to writing these, and stick to reading creative fiction. (NOT SAYING IF YOU’RE NOT GOOD AT THIS TO NOT CONTINUE TO PRACTICE CREATIVE FICTION, I JUST DONT HAVE THE CURRENT MOTIVATION TO GET GOOD AT IT)

Dialovers uses a LOOOOOT of showing. And even so, its “showing” ability is very minimal considering the Japanese language can be vague on its own, it’s medium (visual novel) does not show a lot of things explicitly most of the time (and even when it is shown it doesn’t convey a lot). There’s several CGs of Laito and Yui where it doesn’t show the amount of pain or the dire situation Yui’s in, compared to what she’s saying she’s going through.

When I made my whole breakdown on Laito’s HDB route from Yui’s perspective, I got several comments about how they didn’t realize how bad his route really was. That’s either because people might not have experience with verbal abuse themselves, can’t exactly see Yui’s body language except her head (and even so, her expressions are limited), or don’t know a lot of gaslighting/verbal abuse techniques/have done research into it. Honestly verbal abuse is kind of hard to realize, so I’m not calling anyone dumb here. Despite me knowing a lot of the signs, I didn’t know I went through it––and even so I’ve denied it. And that’s what is so effective about this game though! Especially Laito’s route! Because you’re also sucked in with limited knowledge because you’re seeing this through Yui’s perspective, and on top of that it’s isolating. You can only make so many choices, and I feel like Dialovers is perfect as a visual novel. You get caught up with a lot of shock value things that Laito says, which serves as a perfect distraction for your first time through. But anyways, I’m getting off track.

For example, many people found his Maniac 07 chapter to be very confusing. I broke that one down here as well, and even so I was confused at first (also I was like 14/15, dear god). It tells you SO little, but you know that Laito’s incredibly upset at Richter for some reason, and even so, Yui comments on it a little too. Laito is shown to still hate Richter in DF, but he talks about it a tad more.

Here’s a further example from my writings in that first part of the Cordelia/Laito analysis series but I have bolded the terms I use to convey this rhetoric:

There hasn’t been any flashbacks that specifically show us the first time that happened. However, I believe that there was a flashback in HDB that shows one of the first times. Here’s a scene from Laito’s Dark Epilogue:

Cordelia: ー Laito…Laito… Laito: …Hm? Is something the matter? Cordelia: I have a favor to ask. It just isn’t enough. You can do it, right Laito? Laito: You really are something…So that’s why you came to me again? Cordelia: Fufufu…That’s right, Laito. Come on, quickly… Laito: …Guess it can’t be helped. I’ll love you plenty. Cordelia: Aah…My cute Laito~ I love you. I really do. Laito: I can do it…right? Cordelia: Of course, Laito. Now, quickly…

First of all, ew. Second of all, Laito’s diction implies that this was maybe the second or third time this occurred. He asks a question, and ends it with “again.” We know by this that it is not the first time, but the question also means that Laito might not have expected to occur again. His tone also implies some surprise to it, at least in my ears. His other question, “I can do it, right?” screams hesitance to me. If this scene took place down the line, or after many times he did this with Cordelia, I don’t believe he’d be some level of surprised or hesitance.

That’s what rhetorical analysis is. You take the contextual meaning of the words, the tone they use, and extrapolate what they imply. On top of this, we know that the term “love” here is sexual, implying that they did something sexual. We are not given the details of this, but considering we know that Laito uses “love” before he rapes Yui in the game, we can infer that’s what happened (or something similar) to himself with Cordelia, considering he projects on Yui quite a bit.

I was going to go over what is good/bad analysis, but I think I’ve implied it anyways here. Utilizing separate information from different sources of canon in order to make sense of something is good analysis. That’s our objective truth: canon. I’m not saying I’m the best at analysis, but I am fairly confident in it. It’s how I’m able to attempt to answer some of your “how would Laito react” questions without it being specifically hinted in the game. You cannot cherry pick specific sentences and go off of that alone for analysis. It’s context. It’s reading tone. It’s knowing the characters attitudes towards things, how they speak, etc. There’s a lot going into analysis in general. I know I didn’t elaborate on Aristotle’s rhetorical triangle right now, but that’s for another date I suppose.

Oh dear god I hope I didn’t lose you guys, I know this is a lot of information, but if you have any questions/comments/clarifications, as always, please let me know!

Hope you enjoyed! -Corn

#analysis #ask corn

[bonesandthebees]

ok sd anon officially back

school hasn’t even been kicking my ass i am simply vibrating with anxious energy because i Don’t have things to do and i feel as if i should. and cause i don’t understand chemical engineering <3 also like. two of my roommates are dating each other so that’s a Moment. uni life ig?

i am also watching a tommy stream about 30 min before my discussion section and i could spend that time doing the reading but why would i. least favorite thing abt class is how it interrupts me watching streams!

anyways!!! i meant to say this When clinic ended but it was excellent i’m such a fan and i’m excited for your new project! love the way you write dialogue

also upsetting i didn’t get to go to rakiraki when i was back home :( did go to gong cha though! passionfruit green tea good but a little sweet

thank you for the literary compliment! i’m starting a new contemporary poetry class and i’m excited for that one

also i miss artifact! i went exploring where i am and found such a cool comic book store (vibes excellent) and i miss little bookstores with personality. i’m coming back down in like two weeks or something so maybe i’ll drive to encinitas or something if covid isn’t that bad cause encinitas is not as concerned with covid as i am. swamis… literally mid pandemic they encouraged no mask policies…

i swear i’m going to swing by hmart and grab some black sesame i just didn’t get to recently. not having a car where i am leads to great difficulty or expensive lyfts so i haven’t gone in a while. but i think sd weather has evened out some? so hopefully it stays that way! i miss my balcony terribly (miss the sun).

sd anon my beloved!!!

okay that's a huge mood school isn't kicking my ass because it's online but that doesn't mean I'm doing well because haha I literally don't have enough to do to keep me focused so i'm just out here like :) this is fine :)) also oof uhh hopefully you don't become a perma-third wheel?? and uh, maybe use the sock on the doorknob policy in case you don't wanna walk in on... things...

bestie i haven't done a reading for a class since my first quarter of uni in my freshman year and i'm a senior. it works out surprisingly well depending on how good you are at bullshitting LFKJDKLSF

and aaaa thank you that's so sweet!! dialogue is my favorite thing to write so I have a lot of fun with it :D and I'm super excited for you all to see what I have planned for my new project

the tragedy of missing rakiraki :( also I actually haven't tried gong cha before I'll have to look into it!

swamis... your food is so good but cmon...

OOF yeah not having a car can be really difficult, I have a car but when I'm down at college I still rely more on the bus system because campus parking is ughhhh and atm I think SD weather is a lot warmer so! sunshine is abound! meanwhile I miss the rain lol it's my favorite thing

#ask #sd anon

[assassinshadow17]

Time for a review of the 100th AHW episode. And I will say.... it was amazing! the story and direction were fantastic and overall a great episode, felt like we were back in Season 3 or even Season 4!(Notable as the best seasons) 

SPOILERS, Watch the episode if you haven’t already, or if you don’t care then read on ig.

So first off, I liked the mother-daughter/generations of women being passed down to somewhat “terrible” or “discouraging” mothers. But I believe Kathryn and Katie had good intentions, to try to keep the passed down child from being hurt. As seen with Katie trying to steer Anna-Kat from cheerleading because she could have been made fun of by those girls(only cause they are self-centered and only care about being popular, not Anna-Kat’s fault) I loved Gieselle’s performance this episode, she really locked in her “Anna-Kat” for me and would love to see what she has to offer beyond this 5th season. However the step-mom was the real b**** and she shouldn’t be calling any shots or saying for people “Get over it” A real piece of work she is. At least Kathryn and Katie evaluated their mistakes and made Anna-Kat see that she should blossom and try what she wants to do!

Second off, the upcoming break-up of Trip and Taylor is incoming.... I’m actually really sad about this and I thought we were passed this back in the 5th episode of this season, but apparently they want Taylor to grow out of Trip, or at least move on from him as she’s going through college. I mean I suppose its something that always happens, High School relationships don’t tend to stick, but its really the memories of Trip and how caring he was of the Ottos + Franklin and Cooper. Loved his scenes with Anna-Kat, love his scenes with Oliver and Cooper, especially the family photo episode. Possibly the best episode of the series IMO. So wholesome and showed how lighthearted the show and family truly were. But also its really hard to see others move on, and its life but it freaking sucks and I feel like this will be the sad/disappointment of the season, Cooper and Oliver will be fine, but Taylor and Trip are coming to an end it seems. All the parallels, all the interactions between the two couples.... the promise in Trip returning in the family pic in ten years, would it even happen anymore? I also love his bond between Cooper, they are such supportive and amazing boyfriends to Oliver and Taylor. Their interactions though are so wholesome and are best buds for sure!(Especially since they are the worst hiders in the world LOL, also Cooper being the worst liar but that’s okay lol, if you get the episode reference.) Its too sad and I’m rambling, but I’ll miss Trip. I blame TA lmao, he can leave for all I care. But no I suppose this is for Taylor’s growth(Even if I hate it so much)

Franklin was funny, he really gets in your head lmao. Calling Cooper a dog though I- But he did get it in Cooper’s head that he needed to have his own dreams so that’s cool. Good job Franky!(but not good job in making them fight smh)

Now for Cooper and Oliver....

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OLIVER SAID IT “WE ARE COOLIVER DAMN IT” YES ADMIT YOU ARE BOYFRIENDS AND SAY IT PROUD! To backtrack as well, Cooper opening the scene with his cooking is muy bueno! His food always looks good like wtf?! But anyways, funny scenes with believing everything that the attack ad from Principle Albulin said lol(politics in a nutshell) Like I said before, Cooper finally started to find his dreams. I personally didn’t mind him not having anything yet, and just wanted to be with Oliver. But I’m so glad that they took this opportunity to chase that plotline, Cooper being a chef and enjoying it now, I’m glad he has his own goals. So moving on, Trevor was still an ass but what else is new? I did like how Cooper defended himself though, pretty badass not to take his crap anymore. Cooliver fighting as well, not a conversation we like to hear, especially since it was pretty serious. We knew they would figure it out, but it still hurts-I did like how Oliver got his attitude in order and realized that Cooper isn’t just going to have his dreams, Cooper wanted his dreams too. “No that’s YOUR goal/dream” A time where he got really serious and considered his future. Trevor saying that they were breaking up- Please Trevor, they would never, they always get like this. But yes they said some things.... But now moving on. Oliver did do the right thing and thought of Cooper, that chef apron was so loving and wholesome of him! “Your boy got it right” Stop Oliver, DON’T MAKE ME CRY- However to sum up Cooliver, it was some realization for them and realizing they don’t have to have the same goals to remain boyfriends. They can steer different directions and always end on the same street!(good overall IRL message too, no need to do everything together) They will always be together, even if they don’t spend every second together.

Cute ending scene between Cooliver too. I forgot the dialogue already but lol it was cute. Taylor is wanting Andre/TA, so yeah.... it was an amazing ride we had Trip, but..... (I’m going to go cry BRB!)

So Katie breaking the 4th wall was neat haha, here’s to 100 episodes AHW fandom, Cooliver fandom, every casual viewer! And hopefully many more episode to see and laugh, cry with. To enjoy. This fanbase is incredible, the cast is amazing, the crew gives their very best. To only great things for everyone and its audience, love you all!

Rating for Episode - 9.5/10. Flawless direction and plotline, just didn’t like Taylor and Trip’s trajectory, but that’s subjective ig(although we all hate it lbr)

#american housewife #cooliver #logan pepper #katie otto #daniel dimaggio #oliver x cooper #trip windsor #taylor otto #LiterallySadAboutTrip #meg donnelly #WeWinCooliverSquad! #FarewellTrip #ItHurtsActually #CooliverWillBeAlright #Trilor/TayloripWon'tBeAlright #Memories #hundredepisodes #100thEpisodeMilestone #LoveToAll #CastCrewAudience

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

Bro. I have dug myself such a terrible grave. Why me. Why meeeeeeeee. Why must I be stupid. Help. I have to climb into the grave tomorrow or just Wait Anxiously and I’m Not Having Fun. This is like a really terrible fake dating au hhhfhdhdhdhdh. So like. My zucchini beloved and I are obvs in a qpr. They’re allo and their feelings towards me are romo, and mine are platonic. I’ve never been one much for partnering but I love and trust them more than anything so it all seems p okay and coolio to me, yknow? And they know that, we’ve talked about it and all. Besides the point. So, shorthand is that we’re basically dating ig, as that’s what they say in order to not out me and give a vocabulary lesson every time we tell someone. The Bad part is No One Knows About Aro People And Qprs. HELP,,,, no one else in my life knows I’m aro besides my sister and I’m not ready to come out 😭😭😭 my zucchini’s mom is a bit Very Stressful (aka abusive but that is. Another story) and has always been strict on them. They told me that they wouldn’t say anything, but if they got directly asked, they wouldn’t be able to lie, and I can’t really blame them for that. Lying can be hard, esp about something meaningful, and towards your mom, and abuser. So I ain’t mad just slightly ahhHhHHh you feel me? Bcus their mom DID get sus and asked, so like they confirmed it, but didn’t say it was a qpr or that I was aro bcus No. so their mom knows, but the thing is, my mom doesn’t. She thinks my zucchini is my strictly best friend, and while they are that to me, since qpr fits best, we use that, and yknow, allos gonna be allos and will assume (amatonormative) things. But I’m not ready to come out to my mom. I’m not ready for her to know I’m aro. I’m not ready for anyone else to know I’m aro. It feels way too personal. I know they won’t understand qprs anyway, so I don’t know how I would even begin to try and make at least my mom treat it seriously. My romance repulsion will def be Really Bad if they think my feelings are romantic, but again, I don’t know how to tell them it isn’t. Ik allos can be in qprs, so I could just lie about that, but still. It’s like. Personal?? Ig?? It’s my life, and I’ve always been a private person, and I hate when people make assumptions about my relationships. And again. I don’t think my mom will understand qprs, or even be that open to the concept. I brought it up a bit once, saying something about like a platonic marriage and she went off about how that Wasn’t How That Worked and all, so I just. :(((( Thing is, I’ve dug my grave bcus my zucchini and I are both still minors that can’t drive and live with their parents, and also we live in different states. But I’m going to visit them tomorrow!! And it’ll be really nice!! I can sit through their family’s assumptions and teasing bcus they’ll be there and I won’t have to endure it all the time, nor will it hit as hard. So like. I’m more ready for that. But ofc if we ever have a sleepover, since ppl that date or whatever can’t sleep in the same room apparently even though we’re the same sex so what but I get it bcus yeah kids and Allos,,,, so their mom might mention the whole Dating Thing to mine, and she’ll be all “why didn’t u tell meee” and make everything romo-y. But idk how to tell her by myself without having a whole anxiety attack because I’d be presenting it as romantic. And I don’t wanna ruin seeing my zucchini for the first time in so long. Idk I’m just kinda stressed. I’ll prolly wait it out until I’m forced to say something and then decide what to do at the last minute, but yeah. Idk what this ask quite is but I just. Hndbdhdhhdhshdhhsh :(((

If you're comfortable with it, you could try something like saying the relationship doesn't currently have labels or it's currently undefined. Some allo people will understand that when they don't understand a QPR and it falls under being true.

This would be a bit more of a lie, but if you say something along the lines of you're still working it out and haven't decided at this time if the relationship is romantic or platonic she might accept that too.

You could even say your QPR feels more romantic and you feel more platonic and you're sorting it out and don't worry you've talked about it and are on the same page.

This is all language allo people will understand better. And it skirts on the truth of the actual relationship without you actually having to come out. Lots of alloromantic people have complicated relationships or feel differently about each other, so being clear that this is part of what's going on with you doesn't necessarily mean you're aro. It just means the current relationship you have with QPR is complicated.

This is actually honestly a shitty situation, and sometimes that happens and it's OK to recognize it as that. And sometimes there aren't really any great solutions, but hopefully between the above suggestions, coming out or pretending to be romo, you can at least pick the path you're the least uncomfortable with or think you can manage the most. Go with what feels right for you, and do your best.

And it's up to you if you want to deal with it head-on or wait for your mom to bring it up. But it will probably help whichever you choose to have at least a bit of a plan on how to handle it. And maybe talk to your QPR about it too in case you need them on the same page.

All the best, Anon! I really hope things work out.

[taylorzzzzteatimeee]

first quarter ending-

hi its your friendly neighbor hood Taylor- currently im in high school- anddd its pretty rough let me give you a run down- well uh so basically I got a gf on the first week of school and im already breaking up with her- thought it would work out but she likes other boys- im non binary and I've ofc lost feelings for her- im breaking up with her on Monday- I certainly have a hard time letting go now besides that- there's this one annoying boy in alllllll of my classes- its like I can't run from him- we use to be friends in like the 7th grade but like literally he's the MOST annoying person on this planet- my reputation has been RUINED and when I say ruined I mean it im now know as the Gay girl at school- not like I get bullied its annoying- then there's everyone calling me ugly- haha my insecurities have came back to haunt me- I honestly just want my glow up- its hard sometimes- not having anyone there for you- I wanna become a writer but I have no way with words- im honestly terrible at doing anything artsy and crafty that isn't drawing just not my specialty so many things I wanna get better at but yet- ig its not my time- still wishing for that glow up tho- hopefully it will come soon- but haha that's tea time with Taylor #threeT’s lol byeee Taylor signing off!!

[badfauxmance]

Some of Your Asks About Her...

So here’s some of your questions and comments about Alejandra.

Anon 1: Hey I'm sorry, I was the anon who asked if Ale was a good actress. But I can't view that video because I don't have any social media. Cuz you pls take pity of me and put the video up here.

I couldn’t quite figure out how to upload videos into a post on here anymore. It’s just very strange why I have this trouble now. I was able to upload the Valentine’s Day video her Agency posted on IG before. Somehow my co-writer figured it out, so hopefully you’ve seen it already.

Anon 2:  Funny how sushi fingers hasn’t posted anything today. Not like her not to mooch off Seb’s success.

She doesn’t post everyday, but she doesn’t stay quiet for long. We pretty much expect something from her tomorrow or Monday.

Anon 3:  She really isn't the best. I'm not saying that cause she's a terrible person. She is just very bland and doesn't seem to show much emotions. I tried watching Alta Mar and I couldn't get past the second episode. Yes, she is pretty, but you need more than a pretty face to make it in Hollywood.

Demo reels act as examples of your acting ability while also selecting the best clips of you as well. So if she’s kind of okay or bland, then that’s not a very good sign of her actually ability to me at least. I haven’t made myself watch Alta Mar on Netflix yet. Her other credits aren’t available in the US so I can’t judge what evolution she might have had in her acting.

Anon 4:  Regarding ale speaking english, celeb as fuck posted a VERY short video of her speaking english a while back (around the mid February mark) probably not long enough to get a true sense but not completely terrible.

Hm... I almost forgot about that. Honestly, we’d need to hear/watch her do a speech or an interview in English to get a real gauge.

#alejandra onieva #wannabes just wanna be famous #we are counting down to when this contract is over #when will this trainwreck stop?

[popsunner]

Moonlit Champion: Part One, Fire

@cubedleo ITS FINALLY HEREEE (lemme know if y’all want on a taglist ig??)

A/N: I have finally managed to bs a first chapter to the Spirit Sokka AU are y’all proud of me. AO3 link!! 

Summary: Death by fire was a horrible thing to watch, and Sokka realized then that the raging element would take him one day too.

Sokka had imagined what dying would feel like since the day his mother was killed.

He used to sit by the fire at night and stare into the flames, wondering what it would be like to be engulfed by them. To feel the heat slowly inch up his body, smell his own flesh burning, taste the smoke from his disintegrating skin.

It was… never very accurate when he was little. His father never let him see his mom’s body, and Katara never talked about it.

Like everything else, that changed after he met Aang.

The first time Sokka saw fire kill someone, he froze. He could hear Katara screaming behind him, telling him to hurry, Momo tugging at his arm.

Death by fire was a horrible thing to watch, and Sokka realized then that the raging element would take him one day too.

When Katara asked if he was okay, he lied and said yes.

Funny, how things come back to a person in times like this.

Sokka sees the world in slow motion, his limbs too heavy to move in time. The only thing moving in real time are Katara’s screams, and the flames.

Sokka wonders what his mother was thinking about before she died.

Because all he can think about are the three little kids he’s leaving behind, and that just might burn more than the fire.

Well, not really. The fire burns a lot.

Sokka doesn’t realize he’s screaming until Aang’s hands are cupping his face, saying something Sokka can’t understand. For a second, cool relief sweeps through his body like dipping his blistered and tired feet into a cold lake after a full day of walking, and his mouth clamps shut. Just as quickly as it comes, it’s gone again.

“Not enough,” Katara says, and she sounds angry. Sokka tries to turn so he can see her, tell her that it’s okay, that she’s doing great, but his body won’t comply.

“Dad? What does it feel like to die?”

Hakota raises an eyebrow, eyes rimmed red. “I don’t know. And hopefully neither of us will for a long time.”

“Do you think mom was scared?”

“Get some sleep Sokka, we’ll talk in the morning.”

His chest. That’s where the fire bender got him. He’d meant to shield himself, but his brain sort of stopped working when he saw the fire on its way towards Aang.

It wasn’t the first time he’d been a human shield, but it’s probably the last.  

“Sokka?” That’s Toph, definitely Toph.

This time, Sokka manages to turn and find her, he pretends he does it on his own, and that it isn’t Aang’s hands guiding him. “Oh, hey guys, we win?”

“Always do,” Aang says. Which is, obviously, a lie. They lose a lot.

Sokka smiles, and his face crinkles and cracks like walrus jerky left in the sun too long. “Word to the wise, if you wan’ a tan, don’t ask a fire bender.”

Katara snaps at him to stop joking around. Probably, at least. He doesn’t really hear her. There’s an ocean in his ears, he thinks it wants him to sleep.

It’s loud, everything is loud. Sokka wants to sleep.

He closes his eyes, and the sounds stop.

“Hello, my love.”

Sokka exhales, and the burning fades to nothing.

“Mom?”

***

“Katara! I’ve been looking everywhere for you! Gran gran made dinner.”

Katara sniffs and wipes her sleeve across her face, turning away from her brother. “I’m not hungry.”

“Oh.” She can hear Sokka sitting down next to her, scratching the back of his head. “Well I’m not either.”

Scoffing, Katara reaches back blindly to shove him. “Liar, you’re always hungry.”

“That’s not true!”

“Yes it is. Go eat, Sokka.”

“Fine.” Sokka doesn’t get up. “After you tell me what’s wrong.”

Katara whips around to glare at him, hands clenched into fists. “Mom is gone, that’s what’s wrong. And now- and now dad left too!”

Sokka’s nose is red from the cold, but his eyes are red from crying when he thinks Katara can’t hear. She wants to punch him when he smiles. “You’ve still got me!”

“Until you leave.” Katara hugs her knees to her chest and huffs. “Everyone leaves.”

Sokka throws his arms around her haphazardly, almost knocking them both over. “Not me!”

Faking annoyance, Katara glares at the wide expanse of snow surrounding them. “Promise?”

“Promise.”

Katara’s hands shake with the water she’s pressing against her brother’s chest. He doesn’t move. “You promised.”

“Katar-”

“I need to focus!” Katara snaps, and Toph falls silent. Katara’s eyes sting and she prods deeper, further into the jagged burn that she’s trying not to think about while focusing all her strength on it at once. “Wake up, Sokka. You promised.”

Sokka doesn’t wake up.

Aang is staring at her desperately, his hands cupping Sokka’s face, sitting crisscrossed under his head. Katara realizes how young he looks. Like a scared twelve year old who doesn’t want to lose a member of the only family he has left.

When she looks at Toph, gray eyes wide and feet dug a few inches into the ground, searching for any sign of life, Katara sees the same thing. A scared child.

If she was brave enough to look at her reflection in the water under her hands, she thinks she’d see it in her own face too.

“Don’t make me lose you,” Katara whispers, and her voice breaks. The water falls from her control, and her brother doesn’t move.

Katara blinks and she’s home, and her mother is on the ground, and her mother is dead. She never told Sokka what she looked like that day, no matter how many times he asked.

She blinks again and she’s sitting in a puddle across the world from her home, and her brother is on the ground.

And her brother is dead.

***

Toph doesn’t remember how long they flew for. It’s hard to keep track of anything up in the sky even on a good day, and today wasn’t a good day.

Today was the farthest from a good day she’s ever had.

When they land, everyone disappears. Toph can still see them, still sense them. Aang is on a big rocky overhang with his back to the horizon, Katara is in a nearby cave with… with-

Toph props her feet up on a rock so she can’t see anymore.

“Hey, not that it matters to you-”

Toph inwardly groans. Whenever someone starts a sentence that way it usually ends with ‘you kind of stink’ or ‘your manners are terrible’ or even ‘your parents must be heartbroken’.

“-but I’m proud of you,” Sokka finishes.

Under her, the soft dirt turns to rock. “What?”

Sokka shrugs. “You grew up being told you couldn’t do anything, and look at you! You’re the best earth bender I’ve ever met, and probably will ever meet, and you did it all on your own. That’s pretty cool.”

“You’re a sap,” Toph says with a scoff, leaning over to punch Sokka in the arm. She smiles when he falls over.

They’re quiet for a while, and Sokka doesn’t sit up again. “I’m proud of you, Toph.”

Toph lays down next to him, and pretends she can see the sky. “Whatever. Thanks.”

A wave of hot air blows through her clothes and Toph doesn’t need to have her feet on the ground to know it’s Aang. She shakes her head. “We could all use some cheering up right now.”

Next to her, Momo chirps. Toph nods. “I know. Hard to do without him.”

Her eyes sting and she growls, clenching her teeth and daring the tears to fall.

They do.

Toph looks up and pretends she can see the sky.

“I’m proud of you too, Captain Boomerang.”

***

Aang runs.

There are still Fire Nation soldiers lining up to fight them, there are still burning buildings that need to be put out. There are still people watching, waiting for the Avatar to help them.

He drags his family to Appa and he runs.

The thing he’s running from -the person he’s running from- comes with them.

Aang doesn’t look back. At the town, or at Sokka.

When they land, he sits on Appa and stares at the fading sun until no one is around, and then he runs some more.

He’s hit with a wave of deja vu when he ends up on a cliff, his eyes scan the horizon like he’s waiting for something. Something that will never come again.

Air whips around him and he turns, falling to his knees with the sun at his back. He closes his eyes.

“Why don’t you ever stop to have fun with us?”

Sokka looks up from his maps, raising his eyebrow at Aang. The wind is wilder up on the cliff edge, and his hair threatens to fall from its ponytail. “What do you mean?”

Aang shrugs, counting off on his fingers. “Whenever we stop to go swimming or climbing or riding you always sit out, unless money or food or information is involved.”

“That’s ridiculous.” Sokka gestures to himself and winks at Aang, “I’m the fun guy!”

“Well… you give us fun ideas.”

“Exactly!”

“But you never do them with us.”

Sokka smiles at him softly and sets down the map. “Aang, what’s your job?”

“To restore peace to the four nations, defeat the Fire Lord, and master all four elements,” Aang says automatically, then adds, “But probably not in that order.”

“Yep!” Sokka nods over his shoulder, “What are Katara and Toph’s jobs?”

“To teach me water and earth bending?” Sokka grins at him like he won a prize, and Aang goes red. “So what’s your point?”

Sokka stands up and bonks the top of Aang’s head with a rolled up map. “Those are pretty high stress jobs for two twelve year olds and a fourteen year old.”

“I guess so?”

“So what’s my job?”

It takes Aang a second, but when he gets it he smacks his fist into his palm and nods. “To make sure we have fun!”

“To make sure you know you’re still kids.” Sokka shrugs, “And also plan all our attacks and travel. Plus keep you guys alive so you can actually do your jobs.”

“That’s a lot for a sixteen year old. You know you’re a kid too, right?”

That seems to surprise Sokka, and he frowns. “Well yeah, I guess. But sixteen is basically an adult.”

Aang stares at him, and then pulls a mock mature face. He jumps over Sokka’s head and sits down in the middle of his pile of maps, dangerously close to the cliff edge. “Come on! Let’s finish this together!”

“I thought I just explained to you why you don’t help with this stuff.”

“Hey, if you’re going to make sure we get to be kids, I’m going to make sure you get to be a kid-that’s-basically-an-adult.”

Sokka pinches his nose, and then sighs. “Okay, fine. If that’s what makes you happy.”

“It does, very much. Now! Teach me how to plan, and I’ll teach you how to surf a bear fish!”

“That sounds insanely dangerous.”

“We fought a whole fleet of soldiers six hours ago,” Aang deadpans.

“Okay, good point. But please don’t sit so close to the edge.”

A whole fleet then, and they couldn’t manage eight guards today.

Aang is never going to forget the look on Sokka’s face when he pushed him out of the way of that blast.

“You’re a kid too,” Aang grits out.

No one answers, and his stomach churns and bile burns his throat.

He slams his hands into the ground and screams, and a wave of fire engulfs the sound.

Aang stumbles back, staring at the burnt patch of ground in front of him. The dead grass he killed with his anger. The brother they killed with theirs.

“Why?” Aang whispers.

No one answers, and his stomach churns and the remnants of his fire burns his throat.

***

“Hello, my love.”

“Mom?”

The voice giggles, eerily familiar and warm. “No, silly. It’s me.”

“Yue?”

“You sound surprised, did you think I’d left you alone?”

The inky white around him ripples, Sokka had just meant to shrug. “You’ve been looking out for me?”

“How could I not?”

Sokka wants to hold her, wants to brush his thumb across her cheek and kiss her. He doesn’t even try. “I have to go back, Yue.”

“Why?”

“Are you really asking that?”

She giggles again, and Sokka thinks she sounds more confident than she ever did when he knew her. “Wouldn’t you like to see the people waiting for you? Wouldn’t you like to stay with me? Wouldn’t you like to see your mother?”

Ahead of him is a little house made of ice, and Sokka knows it’s his. “She’s in there?’

“We all are.”

“Mom?” Sokka whispers. He moves forward, then freezes.

“You promised.”

“Yue? Was that you?” Sokka spins in a circle, and the house stays in front of him the whole time. “Yue?”

“You promised.”

Sokka’s fingers move, and he jumps at the sudden control. “Katara.”

His surroundings ripple again, and he thinks he sees a flash of blue. He tries to take a step towards his house, but his feet aren’t there. Despite that, the igloo seems to move closer.

Katara.

That’s the face he pictures when he tries to imagine what he’ll see in that igloo. If he goes, he could finally see his mother's real face again.

“The burden I put on her was never fair,” he says to the igloo’s dark doorway. “Maybe… I could take it away.”

“Neither was the burden you put on yourself.”

Sokka wishes he could close his eyes. “Mom?”

“You could leave yours behind too.”

For a moment, Sokka considers it. Would it be so bad? Maybe if he was his sister, or Toph, or the Avatar, sure. But he’s just… Sokka.

His surroundings shake and he stumbles onto his feet, knocking pressure through his ankles. “I’m proud of you too, Captain Boomerang.”

If Sokka wanted, he could reach out and touch the igloo.

When they first met, Toph barely said anything to him. She dismissed him, didn’t give him the time of day. It pissed Katara off, it frustrated Aang, it didn’t bother Sokka. He’d been ignored his whole life. Not on purpose, but gran gran, most of the villagers, even his mom always gravitated towards Katara.

One more person was nothing.

Then one day she asked him if he thought he was weak because he didn’t have bending, and Sokka said no, and she huffed and punched his arm, and never ignored him again.

It feels like a lifetime since he’s seen her or the others.

One step. He has his feet now. All it would take is one step, and he’d be with his mom again.

“This is what I want,” Sokka tries to convince himself.

“Why?”

Aang's voice sends him to his knees, pain rips through his chest and he screams through his teeth, clutching the front of his shirt.

Tears prick at his eyes and he looks up, into the igloo, his home. One foot more and he’s inside, and the pain will go away.

If he does go, will he still be haunted by the look in Aang’s eyes when he realized Sokka sacrificed himself for him?

Doesn’t the kid have enough weight on his shoulders?

Don’t they all?

This time, when Sokka wishes he could close his eyes, he does. “Yue? I can’t… send me back, princess. Please.”

“My brave warrior, all you had to do was ask.”

When Sokka opens his eyes again, the igloo is gone, and the moon is all he can see.

***

They’re on the beach, and the sun went down an hour ago, and the remaining members of Team Avatar haven’t said a thing to each other since the battle. Sokka lays on the sand, and he looks so peaceful Aang can almost pretend he’s asleep.

He never thought he’d miss Sokka’s snoring.

“Are you sure about this?” Toph asks, breaking the silence, hands clenched at her sides.

Aang watches Katara set Sokka’s helmet on his head gently, her shoulders stiff. “We have to move on in the morning, you know that.”

Toph sniffs. “Yeah, I know.”

“Hey Toph?” Aang whispers, his voice still hoarse from fire bending on the cliff. “Can I hold your hand?”

Wind whipping through her hair, Toph looks like she’s going to say no, and then she reaches out and grabs Aang’s hand in both of hers, and presses her body against his side. “Sure, Twinkletoes.”

Katara stands and lifts her arms. Her stance is off, one of her feet too far behind her, her posture twisted and sagged.

“Do you want help?” Aang asks.

“It’s water tribe tradition for families to send off their loved ones.” Aang slumps, and then Katara’s voice switches into some resemblance of familiarity. “I’d love some help.”

Only using one hand so he doesn’t have to pull his other from Toph’s iron grip, Aang exhales slowly, and the two water benders convince the tides to lead Sokka out to sea.

It hits Aang that this is the last time he’s ever going to see his friend.

Something roars inside him. Roku, Kyoshi, any Avatar who’d ever lost a friend, who ever let their family die. It burns like fire and crashes through him like a landslide, swaying him like the wind and drowns him like the ocean that will be his friend’s grave.

Katara takes his hand, and the glowing he hadn’t even noticed fades from his tattoos.

“Don’t let anger be your last memory of him,” Katara pleads, her voice cracks twice.

Toph’s grip on his hand tightens. “This is it?”

Eyes fixed on Sokka’s limp form, bobbing up and down slowly, Aang takes a breath. “This is it.”

Everything goes white.

Is this grief? Aang wonders as the sand makes contact with his knees.

When he found out his people had all died, he was so caught up in so many other things that he only had time to feel the loss for a moment, and it sent him into the Avatar state. Now, with a full day to let the truth sink in before he has to let Sokka go, he can’t help but think that is what losing someone is really like.

“What’s going on?” Toph asks, and her voice is scared.

“There’s a light. Aang, what-”

Before she can finish, before Aang can process that he’s not the only one seeing this, a wave of calm washes over him, like the first time he tried water bending.

“Do not worry, just as you look out for the world, I have been looking out for you.”

“I know that voice,” Katara whispers, he still can’t see her. “Princess Yue.”

“Who?”

Just as soon as it came, the white is gone. Aang squints as his eyes adjust and focus on one thing.

The moon. More brilliant than he’s ever seen.

“Sokka!” Katara shouts, and she’s running, pulling her hand from Aang’s. She stumbles through the shallow water, sloshing forward instead of using her bending.

Aang tugs on Toph, “Come on. Let’s go see what she’s doing.”

He winces at his choice of words, but Toph doesn’t snark back like she usually does. Now is not the time.

Katara splashes around frantically, shoving water back and forth and soaking herself head to toe. “Where is he? The tide isn’t that strong, he should still be here!”

Toph closes her eyes, and after a few seconds, she shakes her head. “He’s not on the ground, as far as I can tell, at least.”

“Where is he?”

Aang feels dizzy. He puts a hand to his head, stumbling back. Toph holds him steady. “Twinkletoes?”

“Something’s happening.”

Katara stops looking for her brother, stepping back so she’s closer to Toph and Aang.

Aang isn’t sure what’s going on, he’s not even sure it’s bad.

His breath evens out.

The ocean explodes.

A boy bursts through the surface, silhouetted by the moon's light. Maybe it’s wishful thinking, or maybe it really is Sokka.

Katara takes a step forward, the water lapping against her hips. “Sokka?”

The boy’s hair is pure white, and even though he was just submerged in water, it doesn’t look wet at all.

“I think it’s a spirit,” Aang says.

“Who is?”

“Aang, it looks like Sokka.”

“Who does?”

“I know, but-”

“Can someone please explain to the blind girl what’s going on?” Toph shouts.

Katara shakes her head, “I’m going to get him. Even if it is a spirit, he looks unconscious.”

“Who does?”

Aang pulls Toph’s hands from his own, guiding her so she can latch on to Katara. “Let me go. Bridge to the spirits, remember?”

He needs to do something before he breaks.

Toph growls. “You guys suck. Sokka always tells me what’s happening.”

“Well he’s not here, is he?” Katara snaps, and then her eyes widen. “Toph, I’m sorry. I’ll- go, Aang. I’ll fill Toph in.”

Aang nods, reaches out to squeeze Katara’s hand, and dives into the ocean.

It doesn’t take him long to get to the boy, who’s still floating upright in the water despite being knocked out. When he finally gets a good look at the boy's face, Aang’s control of the water around him slips, dunking him underwater suddenly. He resurfaces, coughing and gasping.

It really is Sokka.

#atla #avatar the last airbender #sokka #spirit sokka #ace writes #my writing #uhhhh #yeah #oh yeah #temporary character death #but its okay yall we cant have a sokka fic without sokka #wow how many times does ace need to say yall in one post challenge

[obeymematches]

Hi!! Could I get a matchup if you dont mind? I'm an indian who has black hair brown skin and I'm 5'4 with a little bit of chub I'm abrosexual and ace. Im an introvert and a big nerd for video games and I have adhd and depression too and I hyperfixate a lot. I usually forget to eat and sleep too unless I pass out and honestly really ba at taking care of my health. (1/2)

I have terrible stage fright and problems with authority and impulsive and honestly I do NOT get good grades though I'm always told I'm smarter than my age. I always seem calm but usually I'm freaking out about small things. I always wear oversized clothing amd I have glasses and I love cuddles but it takes me a while to actually trust a person to even remotely touch them . I'm not afraid to use harsh language to show when someone is being a piece of trash(2/2) Sorry forgot to put my name in but my name's robin and I usually go by she/her

Hi Robin!

thank you for sending a request!

okay so this made me think.. i want to give you someone caring and loving who reminds you to take care of yourself (or step in when needed) and encourages self-love. i’m thinking about Beel and Simeon. though i definitely see you and Levi be best friends??? i mean if you are into best friends to lovers then go ahead he’s right there??? 

actually you know what i’m going to write that for you!

obv it started out as best friends, that’s just the way it is with dear Levi, but that’s okay, at least you can know exactly what you get into

becoming his best friend comes quite naturally as you are not so obnoxious as his older brother and he can definitely game with you, so you have something to bond over

you are going to have no choice but to listen to his anime related rants but thats just lovely, knowing how passionate he can be about the things he loves is never bad. but thats ok because you also have hyperfixations which you can talk about! 

once he starts getting attached he can become quite clingy, hopefully you’re down for that

that includes helping out each other in your studies when needed! he isn’t an A+ student either but thats ok, it’s not the grades that matter anyway

Leviathan would never make a move and he is going to remind you about your title (which is “best friend”) on the regular

however you know him well enough to notice him changing a bit over time when he is around you 

by this i mean he is suddenly more quiet? he surprises you with gifts out of nowhere? you think this is cute and sweet so you can’t help but like him more, though you are also concerned because this is new?? then he disappears??? being the tsundere he is

i think asmo will be a big tease in the situation but he means well!!! he knows love when he sees it!! jealous mammon in the background

ig eventually you’ll have to talk about this with levi, like did you upset him, what is going on?? eventually he would come up to you and would want to talk about what is going on but for that to happen he would have to be pushed a bit (either by you or one of his brothers)

anyways he is super concerned about your well-being too, I mean you two been gaming all night and you didn’t even touch the snacks?? babe what is going on 

he would definitely bake somehting delicious for you just to spoil you a bit because thats what his love deserves!!!!! he is good at baking!! 

i mean you could wear his clothes to have that oversized look going on and flustrate him to near death at the same time

i don’t think he would be trashy though, like as i said he can have his confusing tsundere tendencies (and all those self-deprecating monologues) but the fact that you can call him out when needed is kind of a kink of his so you got that going for you too 

but like once you establish a relationship he is. soft. so soft. spoils you so much how dare you not been taking care of yourself noooo!! 

on the other hand though he would also need some extra care because he can be quite anxious especially in social situations, so be prepared to offer your support too! 

other than that i don’t think there could ever possibly be any issues? and like over time i think the two of you would take good care of the other as you are so dear to one another obviously you’d want the best for them

#obey me #obey me swd #obey me levi #obey me leviathan #om! levi #obey me matchup

[all-hail-the-witcher]

You guys are friendship goals how do you make internet friends saph

okay story time this is the progression of mine and @papesdontsellthemselves friendship (complete with pictures)

so once upon a time (actually it was november of last year) i was a Sad high school senior drowning my sorrows in my tumblr account as newsies royalty while i stressed over my college applications and auditions. most of my pastimes included 1. writing shitty fics 2. reading good fics and 3. listening to bad music from 2012. and i happened to stumble upon some newsies pics as one does by Someone called @papesdontsellthemselves or, as was listed in the bio “Mikey” 

nevertheless i binge read all of them at approximately 2am on a school night and probably fell asleep in ap euro the next morning. i very much liked his fics. they were slappy. and i started to stalk his account, as any normal person would.

and once or twice or several times, as any person who runs out of ideas does, he asked for prompt requests. and me, being a sad fangirl of this poor bois account, decided to send him some. (he still has one that he never answered) and he wrote a few of them. this one was my favorite go read it (i think i inspired this one) 

and then one day i opened my tumblr acc and THIS was waiting for me:

and i think i was like KJHSJHASLHJGDSLKH WH

then you know some time went by as time does and we sort of awkwardly coexisted. i actually was within like 10 minutes of him for a college audition before we knew each other that was pretty wild.

and then

the fateful day

i was sitting in ap stats, bored out of my mind, and decided to ignore the lesson on z scores or whatever it was cause what the fuck else are you supposed to do in ap stats and go on tumblr (seriously do not take ap stats its terrible, its an acid trip, i barely passed that class) and i had a message waiting for me from the one and only @papesdontsellthemselves that said something like:

“lol sorry to bother you chief but how to you put your tag lists on your pics so they dont take forever ooo sorry!!” 

and i was like ssksksksjskskjsk why is tumblr royalty @papesdontsellthemselves talking to me, a lowly peasant, and i may have freaked out for a hot sec but then i responded something like 

“i have it in a google doc and then hit the down arrow and the return key really fast lol”

(only recently he revealed to me that he didnt actually give a shit about my tag list (r00d) and that he just wanted an excuse to talk to me and That was what he came up with and he screamed after he sent the message cause he was so scared. also he was in theater with his weird shoeless teacher not paying attention. we’re good students i promise.)  

and then we got to Talking and we just didnt Stop talking? like i told him about jeff, my shitty english teacher and he told me about his theater teacher who made them do 9/11 shakespeare and we bonded and then we sent each other pictures of our dogs: 

mikeys dog, leela (aka leeks Big Chonk) ^^

my dog, lacey ^^

and we also went through The Awkward Stage

but then

a miracle happened

twas christmas eve, about like idk 3pm and the two of us were Awkwardly Conversing as awkward internet friends do and i was getting changed for christmas eve dinner (cause my family Extra and you have to be Fancy or face the Wrath of the Elders) and I'm digging through my closet looking for something Presentable when discover The Pencil Skirt. 

it twas a rather unsuspecting article, green wool with faint plaid stripes, and hand-me-down from some aunt, and i decided to put it on because i had limited fancy clothes and didnt wanna do a repeat from a previous year. so i added my One White Button Down Shirt and some black dance tights and called it a day. 

so then me, being me, was messaging mikey and said (keep in mind were still practically strangers and had been barely talking for a week):

“wow i actually look kinda hot right now like maybe someone would bang me. like, I'm not into that, but I look good enough that someone might consider it.”

yes

me, an asexual, said that to a total stranger on the internet.

what were you Thinking saph.

truly, i have no idea.

but for some reason, instead of being scared away (like a normal sane person should be) mikey laughed and we began calling each other daddy. i dont know okay, it was a wild experience. I'm not sure if it actually happened.

so, my skirt became The Daddy Skirt, a tragic symbol of our strange friendship, and the two of us exited the Awkward Stage.

truly it was an exciting time:

and then we gave each other nicknames. the sappy kind not the cursed kind. mikey was bean cause he was a coffee bean and cocoa bean addict. and i was originally shrub and then bear and finally peanut. im not sure why. he isn't either.

boi also Literally guessed my real name. like straight up. and i was like “o word.” it was trippy. 

AND THEN twas a cold february day when we decided to exchange faces. i send him a picture of me eating a christmas tree. he sent me a picture of him in his kitchen wearing sun glasses frat boy posing. truly iconic.

we also liked to look up weird things late at night and have revelations about dumb shit, as seen by these Unexplained Screenshots i have on my phone:

yes those are real screenshots

then we decided to finally talk on instagram instead of this hell site and i was exposed to mikeys finsta *shudder*

nothing much else interesting happened until: College *dun dun dunnnnnn* 

(except for that one time i had a mental breakdown at 1am and he drove home form some party to ig call me and tell me about the time his dog ended up in solitary confinement. a true g)

so for Safety Reasons, i finally gave milky my number when i got to school and we started texting and Facetiming which was a Trip.

i also sent him a Box of Cursed Content. he tried to send the box back to me in october and it still hasn't arrived. we think it may be in antarctica.

and then we tried to coordinate to meet up like three (3) separate times before We Got Lucky, the Stars Aligned, and we held hands in the back of an a&f

(we also hugged in a nordstrom in like the Fancy Clothes Section and the lady thought we were definitely dating cause we took pics of us hugging in the fuckin mirror pillar. also i almost lost my wallet but thats another story.)

and next year our wild journey will continue (hopefully) 

in conclusion i love mikey and this has been a sappy post

[allykat4416]

Meme Trip 2k19, Pt. 2

Date: May 18th

Park(s): Kentucky Kingdom in Louisville, KY//Holiday World in Santa Claus, IN

I’ve always loved an underdog story. In a world like today, where most parks of note are owned by Six Flags or Cedar Fair, it’s harder for the “Little Guys” to get their foot in the door. I think that’s actually pretty sad, as some of my favorite parks are these smaller, family-owned establishments like Knoebels’ and Waldameer. I also really like the neglected parks in the big chains like Michigan’s Adventure. I think I’m just weird and salty.

But what about a park with humble roots, snatched up by a large corporation and falling victim to an antagonistic fair board and an economic downturn, only to rise from the ashes better than ever? I don’t know about you guys, but that’s the exact kind of place I stan.

I’ve always high-key wanted to visit Kentucky Kingdom since its 2014 reopening. Ed Hart has fought so hard and poured so much of his heart into reviving this park that it makes me want to cheer for them just because I respect the man so much. Plus, it didn’t hurt that I’ve heard KK has more ejector in two rides than Ohio has in two parks. {Having been, I can confirm that’s true.}

I watched them build Lightning Run. I watched them build Storm Chaser. I watched them troll heavily with everyone before announcing Kentucky Flyer. I watched them do all these things, and I yearned and yearned to go. And now, I’ve finally been.

Going into this trip, I’d always been pulling for Lightning Run. It’s the only ride of its kind in the world, and people tend to overlook that because there’s an RMC in the park. I don’t hate RMC as much as I used to after this trip, but I still incredibly hate how the community treats RMC. I anticipated that I would prefer LR over SC, and that did end up being true. I don’t know if I’m soft on this ride because it’s an underdog in a park that’s already full of underdog energy, if it’s because I love the things we’ve done with her character in our story, or what.

Like me, LRun isn’t a morning person. It wasn’t quite what I had expected it to be on our first ride, and I was honestly a bit sad. Not Steve levels of “wow lmao that sucked” because it was still indeed a great ride, but it wasn’t quite as intense as I thought it was going to be. It got more like what I thought it would be after we’d gone through the park, and we ended up riding it three more times after that initial excursion. I don’t like the term “flojector” but if there’s any two rides that I think have it, it’s LRun and Fury. That makes me feel things I’m not sure I want to feel.

It’s short, sweet, and to the point, never wasting your time and a blast from start to finish. The twists and three hills at the end are a choice finale. S-curves, thick ass, give ‘em whiplash indeed. I believe LRun has my favorite first drop of all time too. (If anything is close, it’s actually on an RMC weirdly enough. But I’ll get to that later.) Good on you, Chance. Build a Hyper GT-X in my backyard, please. I love it.

Kentucky Flyer was a fantastic addition to the park’s lineup. It’s got me even more unironically excited for Oscar’s Wacky Taxi. Something about this ride reminded me greatly of Mystic Timbers, but I couldn’t put my finger on what it was exactly. I think the best word to describe this ride is “cute”, but not in a patronizing manner. Fetus Mystic or not, it’s a really fun ride and I can’t wait to see a bunch of new coaster geeks in the area come to the hobby from this being their first coaster. Four for you, Gravity Group. You go, Gravity Group. 

T3 wasn’t as awful as I was anticipating it to be. The lap bars are what sucks, if anything, and the ride does shuffle very noticeably in a few spots. However, the layout isn’t bad and I see why it was cloned so much; if it isn’t broke, don’t fix it. I like the cherry red paintjob as well. Just…please do something about the lap bars. I don’t even mind STR or SkyRush’s! But this, this is terrible. 

Thunder Run surprised me. I’d gone in expecting something like Hurler at Carowinds, since it’s just a clone of that ride. I left kind of pissed off that Carowinds doesn’t maintain theirs like that. I do believe there might have been some modifications to the layout because of structural damage when the park was essentially left to rot after 2010. If that’s the case, I understand. But damn, this thing was actually surprisingly good! I’d need a couple of more rides to really say what I think and we had bigger, angrier fish to fry, but that’s all the more reason for a revisit. 

Obligatory comment that Storm Chaser kicks the shit out of Steel Vengeance, not that it’s that hard to do. I’d heard it was running a bit sluggish that day, and I can get that. It wasn’t as violent as I’d anticipated it to be, but it was still typical RMC ejector like what I’d had on WiCy or TwiTim. It’s not Lightning Rod, but if you compare any RMC to LRod, you’re going to be disappointed. At least Stormy, you know, fucking had ejector. The trick-track double-up was really neat, but I think the first drop is every bit as good. It’s like Timbers’ drop only better. It’s weird in that it’s better in the front. That seems to be a recurring thing here. Like sister, like sister I guess. We ended up riding this three times since we liked it so much. 

Roller Skater was also a really cute family credit, and it’s in a beautiful setting. There isn’t a lot else to say about it. It’s just kind of there for the fetus thrill seekers who aren’t quite ready to take flight on KyFly yet.

The park still has some sense of Six Flags, like a stain you can’t really ever scrub out. I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing, though. It gives the park more character, and it pays tribute to what its past life used to hold. It’s an interesting park that I’m eager to see grow and hopefully prosper in the years to come. Ed Hart cares so deeply for the place, and it shows.  

There were a couple of other enthusiasts at the park that day, and both Roller Skater and Storm Chaser broke down for them after we had left. I don’t know if coasters have souls, but if they do, I tip my hat to those two for being real pals.

Keeping with the theme of family-owned fun, we split the day between Kentucky and Indiana. In another sense, Holiday World was kind of an underdog in this trip with regards to me. I had visited once in October and utterly hated it. I’d overestimated how much progress I’d made in my path to recovery from a prior relationship, and HW had associations with that ex all over the place [being in Indiana, passing road signs from their hometown, them visiting the park multiple times, yadda-yadda.] I’d also had a tough time because of a member of our party who had invited himself to our excursion. I almost fucking killed him on Voyage’s lift hill. But fuck him, he’s a Steve fanboy.

None of that was the park’s fault. Rude people, jealousy, and awful exes aren’t the Koch family’s doing. But it made Holiday World leave a very, very unpleasant taste in my mouth. There were multiple times during the off-season that I didn’t want to particularly come back to this park. I didn’t think I was ready. While yeah, I did have to avoid looking at some of the interstate signs, I know it’s okay to know your limits. We also kept this park very quiet so no one would be a massive cockgoblin and invite themselves at the last minute.

Raven is, as always has been, a pretty solid ride. Not a lot of good coasters opened in my birth year of 1995, but I think Raven is my favorite of that class. I tried to pay more attention to the ride this visit after hearing about the death on it in 2003 and see where that woman lost her life. I definitely understand why it happened where it did, and it makes me feel awful to say that that’s always been my favorite drop on the ride. I feel like I keep saying it, but Raven is in such a beautiful setting by Lake Rudolph and that adds to an already-fun experience to me.

Legend was slated to be down for the day. It was posted on the sign at the front, we’d heard from multiple enthusiasts that he was a sleepy boy, and even the worker at Taco Bell in Corydon told us it was down when she’d visited the other day. However, during our marathon of another ride, we heard talk of them opening Legend for the last couple of hours. Sure enough, we saw a testing train a few minutes later.

We only got one ride and it hadn’t warmed up, so it wasn’t quite as good as I remembered, but I don’t hold that against him. It still feels like a hybrid between Beast and Mystic. We stan Helixes of Death. Legend was really the only ride I remembered a lot from in October, so maybe he just didn’t have as much to say to me as the others did. I’d blocked a lot more from HW out than I think I anticipated myself to.

Thunderbird is easily the best wing in NA (and I’ve done all 4 now, so I can say that. Checkmate, IG twats.) The launch is always a bunch of fun, and I still adore that slow roll at the end. It’s a lot like Banshee’s with ample hangtime. Can KD get one of these to replace what we lost with Volcano? Pretty please? And the little touches like the flickering lights through the queue as well as the launch barn really make the ride a bit more special. We love a dude.

We also rode Crow’s Nest, because God is dead and Starflyers killed him. Since it was so hot out, the breeze was pretty nice. It was also a fun way to relax, unlike the heart attack I’d had earlier on KK’s Ferris Wheel.

Voyage was better this time. I can understand the hype for this ride a bit more now, even though Casie is the only Voyage fan I actually tolerate. Tell me how it stops in the middle of the ride but still doesn’t fuck over its pacing. Tell me how I believe it’s got 24 seconds of airtime. I remember thinking that the night ride was really good, but I had blocked out nearly everything about this ride. I think my favorite part is the twisted section out in the woods with the 90-degree banking. I also was a fan of the tunnels due to the heat! I’m really glad we slipped to the overflow queue to watch it go through one of the final tunnels. Super neat, and I can definitely agree that it deserved to win those Tickets. Even if the Tickets are a scam.

But my favorite part of Voyage wasn’t even a part of the ride itself. It was standing in the queue, realizing I was in Indiana and it was very, very close to the day it all ended. And then I realized… I was perfectly okay. I was with someone I love doing something I love, and everything was just fine. She didn’t have that power over me anymore. She’s gone in every sense. I’m not too proud to say I started to cry in the station. I don’t know why it happened at Voyage, but that ride had been a sore spot and a point of contention for the past 7 months. If there was anywhere to get to that final stage of healing, I’m glad it was at that park and that ride.

I still don’t like it more than some of the other parks I’ve visited [Knoebels, Dollywood, BGW, etc.] but I do appreciate Holiday World a lot more now. Who could hate a place that offers as much free stuff as they do? And how on earth could I hate a place where I was able to finally let go of this pain? I’m glad we had such a positive experience, and letting go of the leftover hurt from that person and period of my life was a recurring theme the next couple of days. If nothing else, this trip helped me put some of those demons to bed. And maybe that’s my own underdog story. 

#trip reports

[fanficrexs]

Qian Kun, our lord and savior

Okay,,, listen,,, Kun deserves better, SM bring him out of the dungeon. I’m patiently waiting for NCT China’s debut,,,, 

It’s hard finding Kun fanfics, so here’s a list of some good ones! I hope you like them too. Kun is an angel, change my mind.

Piano forte by lunalius on ao3

Summary: Johnny and his friends are going to do all it takes for Jaehyun to build his courage and ask Sicheng out. And while doing that Johnny might discover someone who inspires him to pick himself up.

So, we’ve got a side dish of good ol’ JaeWin, but JohnKun is the main ship, I swear! It’s super cute, though the summary kinda made me skeptical, I thought it was really cute! There’s a minuscule amount of angst, but its backstory “when I was a young boy this crap happened” kind of angst. It’s adorable, though.

A October Breeze by Cherubpathy on ao3

Summary: Every one thinks Johnny is a bad boy, but Kun discovers that he's more than the rumours people say about him.

The title has a spelling mistake, I know, it’s how the author put it in, the story is amazing, though, I promise! It’s a really good one with a mostly realistic relationship development. There’s some angst, but no relationship angst. I thought it was really, really cute, and also Kun’s there, so that’s a box checked already :,,)

 and you’re a tease by sunnyjeno on ao3

Summary:  Kun is stressed about the coronation. Dongyoung is having none of it.

So this is a, as you can see, Kun and Doyoung pairing, but honestly, you could take their relationship either way. Also, there’s bits of Chenle and Johnny (not in a relationship, it’s okay) and they’re hilarious. 

Sweet Talk by VeeTheSheep on ao3

Summary: Fridays were "gush about Kun in english" date nights. or so they thought.

This is poly JohnTenKun, so if you’re not into that, this won’t be you’re thing. It’s a super cute, semi-short one shot that’s just complete fluff with a bit of Kun teasing JohnTen at the end. It’s really cute, honestly. 

I’ll call her Mina by tennisuhs on ao3

Summary: Kun is working on his thesis and Taeyong is on his way to become a very important chef. At the doors of proper adulthood, with questions no one prepared them for and situations that weren't on the books, the couple just go through life like two fish in a pond. 

Or where Taeyong makes food for everyone since it's mid-terms season, and Kun loves his boyfriend to bits.

Even though the title mentions a Mina, there’s no Mina in the story? Unless I’m forgetting something. But it’s a really good, cute one. Just TaeKun being domestic and adorable, and Taeyong making a ton of food. It’s really good, go give it a try!

Warm by criesmom on ao3

Summary:  Johnny didn't expect to meet the love of his life in Ten's bathroom

This one is hilarious? Or the part where they meet in the bathroom is. It’s really short, not much too it, but it’s cute and fluffy with no angst. 

a piece of (gluten free) cake by umiwomitai on ao3

Summary: Kun is the nicest neighbour Johnny and Yoonoh have ever had. He never complains about the noise, isn't noisy himself, and most of all, always gives them leftovers of whatever food he makes. Really, how could someone not fall for him?

This is exactly what Johnny wonders as he bites into a slice of (gluten free) chocolate pie, totally not falling for his Chinese neighbour.

This is an amazing one. Like, 10/10 love it, go be a confident gay Kun, I love this one a lot. It’s one of my favorites. I can’t really explain why, but you’ll like it too! hopefully... It’s, I’m pretty sure, angst free.

hannah montana by sunnyjeno on ao3

Summary: Kun and Doyoung used to be friends during their awkward preteen years. Everything changed when they entered high school, but the feelings they shared for each other just grew. Will they finally get it together in time for their last homecoming ball?

Another Doyoung Kun from sunnyjeno! It’s a cute one, but it’s open ended, so they don’t get together (though it’s implied they do) but it’s overall really cute.

Cardiac Arrest by lunalius on ao3

Summary: Kun is concerned about the regular that shows up at least five times a day to order a double strength large long black. Or he's attracted to him. Or both.

Oh boy, do I have a lot to say about this. I’ll start this speech off by saying that whoever lunalius is, they’re amazing and I would die for them. I’ll continue it by saying this is an emotional rollercoaster. It’s Angst with a Happy Ending in a nutshell with that perfect bit of humor. It’s beautiful, it should be printed and sold and I would buy it and read it every day, that’s how much I love it. It’s a lengthier one, almost 15,000 words (which isn’t the longest I’ve read, but it’s still lengthy for a one-shot). I should mention that it’s a JohnKun story, too. It’s beautiful. Like, 100/10 good. I really, really liked it.

my answer is you by gabilliam (vvhymack) on ao3

Summary: kuntober week i ; prompt ; I went to water my plants on the balcony and you’re on yours with a tinfoil hat, what the hell are you doing?

My God, here come all of the lengendary fanfictions. Two favorites in a row. This one is funny, with only a little bit of pining angst in it. It’s hilarious and also includes a gat, which is always amazing. It’s a rarer pair, JaeKun, but I enjoyed it, and, it’s honestly just amazing. It’s super cute.

wedding bells by _helios (neocitz) on ao3

Summary: Lucas gets roped into helping his boyfriends plan their wedding.

(He, unfortunately, never caught onto the fact that they proposed to him.)

It’s poly Jungwoo-Lucas-Kun, but anyway... So... Angst. Capital ‘A’ Angst. It’s mostly sad, but that’s what makes the ending so much happier. I don’t want to give it away so I won’t say anymore, but just be prepared for angst.

Brass by 11dishwashers on ao3

Summary: Kun has a hard time dealing with his new boss Sicheng, who's a literal model.

Winwin is a model and beautiful, Kun works for him and is also beautiful, the rest of the ‘96 liners show up, it’s beautiful. Also a bonus, pretty minimal angst.

Happenstance by lunalius on ao3

Summary: Johnny, single father of one, gets another parent to look after Donghyuck in the playground while he has to rush home on a work errand. And Donghyuck makes a new friend.

Guess whose back.... back again... lunalius is back.... tell your friends.... This one has minimal-ish angst. I say -ish because its between minimal and medium angst, so. Forewarning. It’s very cute, Kun’s son is Chenle, and it’s beautiful. There’s not much I can say without giving everything away, but it’s also a good one.

serendipity by cameldreams on ao3

Summary: johnny can't sleep

That’s it. That’s the fanfic. Johnny can’t sleep. Kun’s precious, what’s new. 

it beats for you so listen close by heartsighed on ao3

Summary:  In which Johnny moonlights as Y, one half of the mysterious duo that runs the most popular radio program on campus, and Kun moonlights as Twitter user zhoujielunshusband96, dedicated Jay Chou fanboy.

Medium angst. That’s all there is to this. Medium angst. It’s really good and cute, would definately reccomend (though ig that’s what I’ve been doing this whole time).

kun’s flirting 101 by timelessidyll on ao3

Summary: Sicheng, naturally, was a more introverted person. Part of that was because of his intense hatred of cute and silly things, and the other part was that he hated almost 90% of the people he met. He made sure to consistently remind Chittaphon and Kun that he, at most, tolerated them. The thing about Sicheng was that everything needed to align perfectly for him to really enjoy something. He had to have a good mood, be around Kun or Chittaphon, and be doing something not silly. That led to to the question: What was Kun trying to accomplish?

Length summary, lol. It’s a really cute, fairly short one full of terrible puns (that gives a little too much away, though). No angst, just Sicheng being tsundere. 

maybe I could hold you? by edgeplay on ao3

Summary: Yuta's always had bright ideas, this one takes the whole cake though.

Okay, listen. I ship YuWin pretty hard, but this got me into YuKun. Yuta and Kun? Not a pairing I’ve ever imagined, but god damn this is so good! It starts as your typical ‘fake dating’ story troupe, but I like the way it ends so much. I’m literally in love with this! Read it. Do it.

cut through the clouds by heartsighed on ao3

Summary: Qian Kun, microbiology major, vice-president of the ISA, part-time poster model and full-time mom friend, is perhaps more stressed than he would like everyone to think.

heartsighed on a roll man! This is a DoTenKun poly ship story, don’t like, don’t read. It’s very good, with a lower case ‘a’ angst. There’s a good amount of angst, but it’s not capital ‘A’ angst. So, I hope you understood that. 

What the Spring? by haknyeonsmrjoo on ao3

Summary: Winwin keeps a photo of Kun on his phone, and the next thing he knows, Kun has Winwin's phone in his hand.

This was actually one of my first NCT fanfics ever! I thought it was the cutest on Earth. I’m a bit biased though, and you’re only gonna hear me say this once, but I’m Chinese and I’m mostly biased toward Chinese kpop stars because, hey! How do I watch Chinese idols from America? Answer, I don’t. It’s easier to access kpop... :,,,) This a short oneshot, very cute and fluffy

That’s it! hope you enjoyed it, and stan our king Qian Kun!

#qiankun #qian kun #qian kun is a king #johnkun #jaekun #taekun #winkun #yukun #dotenkun #nct #neo culture technology #nct 2018 #nct china #nct u icons #nct 127 #nct dream #stan nct #release kun from the dungeon sm #sm pls #he's too talented #just like ten #kun #blink twice if you need help

[marlonrae]

&. SASHA VISITS MONA!

who: @fckmonax​ and sasha; preston’s friend. & marlon. where: mona’s place warning: highkey! problematic! - nsfw ig.

SASHA

knocks on the door a few times and waits, scrolling through her phone

MONA

jumps at the sound of a knock on the door, carries ven with her to go open the door “Hopefully you’re not a murderer!” opens the door, grins at sasha, pulls her in for a hug “Wow, I totally forgot I invited you over.”

SASHA

laughs and shakes head, rolling her eyes at mona's comment ''Am I that irrelevant? I don't think so.'' chuckles and gasps when she looks at ven ''YOU'RE SO MUCH MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN I THOUGHT YOU WERE, WOW.'' grins widely and strokes Ven's cheek. ''Oh my god, pictures don't do her justice, look at her.'' pouts

MONA

laughs, shrugs “What can I say? My brain has been very occupied with all things Venecia all morning.” steps aside to let her in, grins at the compliments, knows they’re all true “Wanna hold her?”

SASHA

grins, looking like she won the lottery. ''Yes, of course, yeah.''

MONA

chuckles, pushes the door closed “She’s like the easiest baby ever, I promise.” kisses ven’s forehead, carefully maneuvers to hand her off, switches to baby voice “Hey Venny. This is mommy’s friend. She’s gonna hold you for a bit, okay?” doesn’t let got until sasha has her securely

SASHA

grins at both ven and mona and holds her like a pro, placing a hand in the back of V's head. ''Ugh, I already love her so much.'' looks down at Ven and kisses her cheek gently. ''The most beautiful baby ever, I SWEAR.''

MONA

smiles proudly at the two of them getting along so well “Isn’t she just the best? I am totally obsessed with her and I’m glad you can see why.” pulls out her own phone, snaps a pic of them “Seriously, though. I’m not sure what I did to be blessed with a baby girl so perfect. I can’t wait for her to be just like me!”

SASHA

''She really is the best.'' cant stop looking at Ven and giggles when mona snaps a picture of them. ''You need send me that asap.'' nods ''For sure, she's gonna be just as beautiful as you are when she's older, you'll see.''

MONA

nods, immediately sends the photo over ”Oh, please. She’s gonna be prettier than me. We don’t even look like mother and daughter.” pouts

SASHA

furrows brows and looks at Ven and then at Mona. Hums. ''How does her dad's side of the family look like?''

MONA

“Dark hair, dark eyes, tan skin. They’re Puerto Rican.” navigates through phone, pulls up a pic and hands it over “This is her Aunt Mariana. She literally looks more like her than like me.” pouts

SASHA

looks at the pic and frowns, def seeing the resemblance. ''I mean, yeah, she's pretty and all but I'm sure Ven will grow out of it and look more like you as she grows older.''

MONA

“I wouldn’t mind if she continued to look like Mariana though. Mariana’s gorgeous.” shrugs, sighs “Do you want anything to eat or drink?” leads the way towards the kitchen “Preston’s weird about his stuff, so maybe don’t touch anything?”

SASHA

shrugs, not at all impressed by mariana's looks. ''Yeah, I guess she's alright.'' looks down at ven and smiles, blown away by how adorable she is. ''Hm, do you have snacks?'' giggles

MONA

looks at them adoringly, checks through the cabinet for snacks “Looks like we have potato chips... barbecue ones, oreos, an assortment of fruits. Sorry that the selection is kinda lame.” shrugs “We can also go out if you’d like.”

SASHA

hums ''Do you have ketchup?''

MONA

quirks brow “Yes...”

SASHA

“Potato chips with ketchup are a blessing.” grins excitedly

MONA

makes a disgusted face “Would’ve never guessed that you’d be the type for that combo, but who am I to judge?” grabs both the chips and ketchup for her “Want me to grab her?” gestures at a now asleep ven

SASHA

''I can't believe she fell asleep on me.'' smiles and pouts at the baby. ''I love that she's comfortable, ugh but yeah, I'll take her again in a bit.'' very carefully hands ven over

MONA

“She’s probably exhausted from the sleep she didn’t get last night.” takes ven, rocks her to keep her asleep “That and she’s totally comfortable with you.” puts ven in her crib, walks back out with the baby monitor “But I didn’t ask. How are you? How is life?”

SASHA

frowns ''Why? What happened?'' totally walks into the kitchen as if she owns the place and grabs a bowl for the chips and pours ketchup all over them. ''Life is good, a little uneventful at the moment, but good. Michael's been working a lot lately and that's super boring.'' sighs, eating her chips. 'Want some?'' offers the bowl ''What about you? Your life seems to be much more eventful than mine.''

MONA

“No clue. She just had energy all day and night for some reason.” sighs, shakes head “Literally P and I got no alone time.. if you know what I mean.” watches her, genuinely confused by the chip situation, shakes head “Your whole life doesn’t revolve around Michael though, right? - Unfortunately, my whole life does revolve around Venecia.”

SASHA

frowns ''If you ever need alone time, I could help babysit. Just give me a call.'' smiles and shakes head ''No, it revolves around my phone, mostly.'' laughs ''I truly don't have a life but I don't really care, it's fine. I'd love to have more action or drama but I guess I'm lucky I don't.'' shrugs, eats more chips

MONA

“That would be amazing, but that’s what my sisters are for. I would never pass on an irritable Ven to you.” chuckles “I’ll get them to babysit some time while we hang.” shakes head “Believe me you do not want drama. What’s so entertaining on your phone though?”

SASHA

''I doubt she ever gets irritable.'' chuckles, is literally loving her chips. ''But I do, nothing exciting ever happens for me. I wanna be involved in something entertaining. Do you get drama often?'' chuckles ''Honestly, social media, online books and youtube.''

MONA

scoffs “Play one round of peek a boo with her and you’ll see how irritable she can get.” sighs “Honestly.. So much. Like a sex tape of me and my sister’s husband literally leaked a few months back. Drama follows me everywhere, so if I could have it not, that’d be ideal.”

SASHA

gasps, puts the bowl down ''A sex tape with your sister's husband?'' jaw drops ''Please, elaborate.''

MONA

sighs “Well it was old first off, and he wasn’t her husband at the time of filming.. was her boyfriend, though.” shakes head “I probably shouldn’t be telling you this. It’s way too soon for you to know this about me.” chuckles “But we were both just kind of going through weird stages in our relationships and we did something stupid.. multiple times. And I guess at some point in our drugged out, sexed up state, we thought making a video was a good idea.” sighs “I didn’t even remember any of this, but kind of just had to put the pieces together when suddenly there was evidence of it floating around.”

SASHA

is shocked and wide-eyed but lowkey loves everything about the story even though she probably shouldn't. chuckles. ''That's... terrible but amazing.'' chuckles again, shaking her head ''Is he cute?''

MONA

laughs, shakes head "I'm definitely going to hell for it, but you're totally gonna lose some points for that reaction." chuckles "You will not find him attractive. He kind of gives off Jafar from Aladdin vibes." pulls up a pic of marlon on her phone "This is Marlon. He's my best friend."

SASHA

jaw drops again, takes the phone and stares at it for a good 30 seconds before looking back at mona ''Oh... my god!''

MONA

takes her phone back, rolls eyes

SASHA

shakes head, shocked ''Mona, I know him.''

MONA

jaw drops "What?"

SASHA

nods, wide-eyed. ''It's kind of a long story but basically he was my brother's drug dealer for like the longest time and they would hang together and I always thought he was so hot and I was younger than him but I...'' chuckles, shaking her head ''... finessed him and I sneaked him in one night and yeah.'' shrugs and giggles. ''I had like the biggest crush but then he kind of like grew tired of me..'' pouts slightly ''... eventually I got over it, though.'' shrugs dismissively ''But woah, this is so bizzare.''

MONA

stares wide-eyed, listens, shook "Holy shit... He wasn't like, your first or anything, right?" pulls out her phone "I'm texting him right now. Can I invite him over?" laughs, shakes head "This is insane." laughs some more "And you genuinely liked him? Wild." laughs

SASHA

laughs. ''I mean, there was a guy before him but I was really young and  he was basically the first guy I ever had like real sex with but no, he didn't actually took my virginity, my neighbor Jason did when I was even younger.'' laughs and covers her mouth, shaking her hand. ''OH MY GOD! I haven't seen him in forever, that's so embarrassing.'' laughs and nods, figuring that this was truly the most problematic thing happening in her life in the past year or so. ''I liked him so much.'' shakes head, still laughing. ''I thought he was the hottest dude around. - I mean, he is kinda hot but please don't tell Mike I said that.'' chuckles

MONA

finishes writing out her text to marlon, focuses on sasha again "This is truly the strangest coincidence. I'm glad he didn't take your virginity though. That'd make him coming over here a little more awkward than this is already gonna be. " literally just laughs some more, trying to stop, failing "Dude, he's so hot. In a hot chicken kinda way, but hot. Obviously, I think so. I like... risked it all for him. We stayed friends though. Which is truly amazing."

SASHA

nods in agreement ''I only said kinda because I thought you would judge me but yes, he is 100% hot.'' laughs ''He just looks so different from everyone around and his face is so, so nice and okay I shouldn't be saying this but he was like actually good in bed in a lazy, high, kind of way. - I think that made him even hotter.''

MONA

"Why would I judge you? After that story I just told with him as the other person in the scenario? This is a judgment free zone." replies to marlon, continues talking "Oh god, we really shouldn't be discussing this.. but yeah. Those days where it just Marlon and I and a bunch of coke and molly? Some of my best days." groans, shakes head "Don't ever repeat this, obvi."

SASHA

''Of course I won't.'' laughs ''He 100% used me back then, we had sex like four times and he would never even call me or anything.'' shakes head and laughs ''I mean, it was enough for me because it meant he gave me a tiny bit of his attention and–''  M(arlon): literally walks in as if he's walking into his own apartment. ''Ramona, this better be good or else I swear I will shove my fist up yo–'' stops when he notices she has company. furrows brows  S(asha): looks kind of terrified but laughs ''Hi.''  M: raises eyebrows ''What are you doing here?'' looks at Mona ''What's going on?''

MONA

is kind of saddened by her story, doesn't have time to respond "Hey!" looks in between the two of them, a cruel smirk on her face "Marlon, this is my new friend Sasha."

SASHA

S: smiles mischievously and nods ''I'm sure you don't remember me.'' M: raises an eyebrow and shakes head, pretending to be oblivious even though he remembers every single lil detail about sasha ''I don't.'' shrugs, looking back at Mona ''Did you just bring me here to introduce me to a friend?''

MONA

scoffs, offended for her new friend sasha "Marlon, cut the shit. I can see it in your eyes, I know you know who she is, so how about not making her feel even worse than you did when you fucked her and ditched her all those years ago." rolls eyes, looks to sasha "Clearly, you missed out on nothing by him ghosting you."

SASHA

S: smirks, loving mona's attitude ''Yeah, trash.''    M: exhales deeply ''Did you expect me to propose?'' asks sasha, raising an eyebrow ''What are you two even doing together?''    S: ''Not really, a call would've been nice.'' shrugs M: ''It was ten years ago, Sasha. Move on, maybe?'' gives her a look ''Forreal, what's up?''

MONA

"Ah, so you do remember." shakes head "I gotta say, my sister really hit the jackpot with this one." is entertained by the whole situation "Nothing's up. We're friends now. Preston is buddies with her boyfriend, we met through them and realized that we kinda have a lot of common... Clearly more in common than we originally thought since we've now learned that we've both seen a scrawny chicken boy naked."

SASHA

S: laughs, shaking her head. ''I mean, I don't blame him. I've been told I tend to leave an impact on people.'' smirks, grabs her bowl of chips again.

M:  shakes head, staring at sasha and shaking his head when he sees the chips ''See, that's exactly why we never worked out. Why would I ever trust a stan of chips covered in ketchup?'' makes a face ''Disgusting.'' 

S: ''Hey!, don't be a hater.'' rolls eyes at him, hugging the bowl 

M: chuckles ''I guess rich, spoiled brats have a thing for scrawny chicken boys like me.'' smirks ''I can't blame y'all. I would too if I was dating the men you all seem to date.''

MONA

claps hands together, grins "This is amazing." turns to marlon "I was giving her a crash course, like on who I am as a person and why all the drama in my life isn't fun, so I mentioned that leak that happened a couple months back. And she was like no way, details please. And I showed her your pic and she was shook to learn that it was you. I am shook to learn that you two banged... Literally when she was so young, but we'll save that conversation." drapes an arm over marlon's shoulder " But yeah, I was telling her about we're bestest friends and you looove me." pulls him into a hug, dramatically kisses his cheek

SASHA

S: eats her chips, laughs at the summary ''Aww, I'm lowkey sad you guys didn't work out. It would've been so cute.'' half joking

M: nods and looks like the cloe meme as soon as mona is all over him but doesn't even move. looks down at his best friend ''Can you.. not?'' rolls eyes when she kisses his cheek but stays put ''I love her so much she's pulling this type of shit right now and I still haven't punched her in the face.

S: laughs and hums, putting her bowl down and walking over to him and grabbing his face before kissing his other cheek. laughs. 

M: shakes head and pushes the two of them away. ''Get off.''

MONA

"Nah, it was for the best. If the two of us actually became a thing, we probably both would have OD'd by now. Plus, there'd be no Venecia and that isn't even a world I'd like to live in." chuckles when sasha joins in, squeezes him even tighter, scoffs when he pushes them away "I mean, technically we have both gotten you off before... if that's what you meant by get off." winks, knows she's being horribly problematic

SASHA

S: rolls eyes and laughs, eating her chips again. ''I got you off several times. - Remember that one time   I got you off like twice in a three minutes period?'' smirks and looks at mona ''That was my personal best. I did good.'' chuckles

M: Knows hes going to hell and laughs at mona's problematic comment, shaking his head and narrowing his eyes at sasha. ''You want a medal?''

MONA

"Twice in 3 minutes? His little chicken dick was probably weeping with joy that it got THE Sasha," pauses, thinks "I don't know your last name, to BLESS it with her touch." shrugs "I don't know. I think she deserves a medal."

SASHA

S: laughs at mona's comment and nods ''He was so shocked, you could tell I was basically changing his life. - Sasha Cole, that's me.'' laughs ''It's such a pornstar name but I guess it goes well with my life-changing sex skills.'' smirks

M: ''You were also sixteen and I was a grown adult so we should probably never discuss that ever again.'' rolls eyes

S: shrugs ''That didn't stop you from fucking me, did it?''

M: ''It did.'' gives her a look. ''I'm guessing your men don't know y'all are speaking so fondly of my dick, do they?''

MONA

just observes the dynamic of the two of them, so intrigued "Huh. So your morals came into play, just way too late in the game?" shakes head "You guys were so messy. I love it." shrugs "Nobody's man gotta know about this conversation just like your woman doesn't need to know. Simple as that." ven starts crying on the baby monitor, nipples immediately begin to ache and leak "Don't go anywhere. I'll be right back!"

SASHA

S: hums, frowns ''Is that seriously why you never contacted me again?'' furrows brows ''Because of my age?''

M: ''Yes, Sasha. Are you gon' cry about it?'' rolls eyes at her. ''Why would I ever tell anyone about this meeting?'' is immediately interested by P's knives and grabs one, is weirdly fascinated by it.

S: furrows brows and can't believe she's somehow feeling somewhat attracted to marlon at that very moment ''Preston doesn't like people touching stuff, you know?'' brows still furrowed

M: looks at S, staring at her for a second. ''Are you telling him I went through his shit?''

MONA

literally takes her time getting ven, debates feeding her but knows she needs to go back to her guests, carries ven out in her arms "MARLON!! What are you doing? Put that down!" hurries over "Give me that. Now." looks around frantically "Sash, here." unceremoniously hands ven over to ketchup hands, ven is now crYING "I'm not even allowed to touch these, why would you be?" looks through drawers for a cloth to wipe marlon's prints off with, puts hand out for the knife

SASHA

S: jumps a little at mona's reaction and struggles to grab ven without making a ketchup mess all over her baby clothes. starts to kinda rock the baby to sooth her but is watching the whole thing go down with furrowed brows

M: looks mad confused ''What the fuck are you doing?'' gives her the knife ''What.. the fuck.... are you seriously wiping prints off the knife?'' ainsley's face hits his mind ''Stop doing that.'' shakes aisnley's face away and furrows brows 

S: ''Shh, it's okay baby.'' rocks ven

MONA

literally ignores him, wipes the knife off soo thoroughly, carefully inspects it for any leftover marks, hums in satisfaction, returns it to its rightful place "Sorry, he just notices things, okay? And literally like the one rule I have here is to never touch the knives." sighs, stressed suddenly, takes a bottle from the fridge for ven and warms it, holds it out to sasha "It's not you, she's hungry."

SASHA

M: He's deadass so weird.'' shakes head ''You really gon' make ketchup hands feed your child?'' shakes head and takes ven from Sasha with one hand and the bottle with the other, showing pro skills at the whole thing. starts feeding ven and the baby is suddenly quiet and happy to be eating.

S: everything happens so fast that she's just observing, chuckling at how smooth marlon was at taking the baby and feeding her ''That's kinda hot.'' is wide eyed when she realizes she said that out loud.

MONA

"Ketchup hands was the one without a knife. I had to make a decision." shrugs, watches, smiles as he feeds his niece Clearly, you've had lots of practice." raises brows at sasha's comment, knows they've def crossed a line at this point "Sasha!" shakes head, chuckles "Was this a bad idea inviting Marlon over?"

SASHA

M: shrugs, not seeing the big deal ''Being a dad teaches you a thing or two.''

S: giggles and her cheeks start heating up. changes the topic. ''I mean, yeah. Good dads, though.'' shrugs ''Ven's dad can't relate.''

M: raises an eyebrow ''You got something to say, Sasha?'' 

S: laughs ''Hm, yeah. Ven's dad is a flop.'' shrugs, goes back to her chips.

M: ''Your dad is a flop. I mean, his teenage daughter was out there finessing grown man into fucking her.'' furrows brows

S: furrows brows, offended

MONA

cringes, really don't wanna be a part of a convo about fab, lowkey relieved when marlon changes the topic a lil, walks over, lightly and playfully slaps him on the side of his face "What teenager doesn't finesse grown men into fucking them? Shut up." goes over to sasha, pulls her into a hug "Stop being mean to my friend."

SASHA

S: is mad and lowkey sad because she ain't used to people being mean to her ''You were the adult so technically you were the one responsible for it.'' crosses arms over her chest and leans into mona's touch 

M: ''Right, that's exactly why I ended it.'' is annoyed ''Seriously, this was years ago, why are you so pressed? Chill.'' 

S: stays quiet and shrugs

MONA

frowns really upset by the turn this is taking "You're literally just being mean, Marlon." notices sasha going quiet, hugs her tighter, really ain't trying to lose this friend already just bc marlon is mean "Anyways. This was fun and all, but you can go now, Mar."

SASHA

S: gives him a look. ''What do you even get out of being so mean?'' frowns 

M: rolls eyes so far back he caught a glimpse of his brain ''Man, are you still sixteen?'' shakes head and furrows brows before looking down at ven and kissing her cheek and then her forehead. ''Take her.'' carefully hands her to Mona 

S: shrugs slightly again, frowning and hugging mona back ''You're gross.'' @marlon

MONA

frowns, gladly accepts her child, literally just ready for this all to be over "I'll talk to you later, okay?" also @ marlon

SASHA

M: gives mona a look ''Apologize to Hazel, you were gross.'' turns and stares at S for a quick second and reaches for her face, pinches her cheek. ''Toughen up, you're grown now.'' narrows eyes at her. ''You're cute.'' smiles, walks away fully aware he just rocked her world again.

S: is sixteen again and looks up at him, feeling flustered when he calls her cute and furrowing her brows when he leaves

MONA

rolls eyes "Yeah, obviously I will." watches his interaction with sasha, confused and kind of disgusted, shakes head "Alright, enough of that." shuffles him to the door, her hand on his back basically pushing him out "Goodbye, Marlon... We're definitely talking soon."

SASHA

looks like she's about to cry, grabs her bowl but there's nothing there. pouts.

MONA

shuts the door, turns just in time to see sasha's face "Please don't cry!" hurries over and pulls her into another hug, ven squished in the middle "I am so sorry, that was an awful idea."

#chat