#gonna queue stuff out of order and do stuff like that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

desceros · 1 month

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@fidgetyfawn hi hi so i thought i'd go and give you a very brief tumblr beginner/early intermediate guide since i've also seen some other people around here that may find it useful!!

i'm going to assume you know little to nothing, and this post is good both for people who are just looking to find cool art/fic/whatever, or for people looking to post their own art/fic.

click on the readmore here and i'll give you a bit of a walkthrough for how to get things set up and how to start interacting with people, as well as some basic etiquette!

THIS IS A VERY LONG POST!! pro tip: if you're on desktop, you can use the J key to skip down a post and the K key to skip up. youre welcome

so first things first, when you log in, the first thing you'll see is your dashboard. this is where posts from people you follow will appear.

dashboard management

i can't remember if this is the default or not, but i highly recommend you change your dashboard (almost typed dachshund ATD counter: 1) to chronological order. you can do this by clicking settings on the left, then dashboard (ATD counter: 2) on the right.

personally, i uncheck the 'shorten longer posts' option since it cuts things too short, and further down you'll see the option that says 'best stuff first'. turn that shit off. you'll miss a lot of posts from people you follow if you have it on. actually, everything on that preferences section can get turned off. tumblr is designed to be more curated, and those are all options the staff added trying to emulate things like twitter. they suck. turn em off.

how to find blogs to follow

so now that you've got your dash set up, it's time to get some shit showing up!! you've already started off right by following me, so i can see you know how to do that much. but in case this post breaches containment, i'll put some tips here for people:

if you see people out in the wild that you like who link their tumblrs, go check em out. see if you like what they post. if so, you can follow them. this will put their posts on your dashboard, and they'll get a notification that you've followed if they have those turned on.

once you find someone you like, check out who they're reblogging from. go check out those blogs. see who they're reblogging. go check out those blogs. search for things that you're interested in, and click on the people posting into those tags (more on this later). eventually, you'll be following lots of people who post things that you like, and now you can start really curating your own posting experience.

some people will have a DNI (do not interact) linked somewhere. if they do, it's considered good etiquette to give it a look and make sure you're not gonna step on toes. some people will have a "blank blogs"/"ageless blogs dni" on theirs, or say they'll block you if you're a blank/ageless blog. this is because a lot of bots will have a blank tumblr, so it's a good idea to make some text posts or something saying IM REAL I PROMISE and you can have "i'm an adult"/"18+"/"(your actual age if you're comfortable with it)"/"(an approximation of your age, e.g. 20s, if you arent)" before you get too in the weeds on following people.

sidebar, once you're blocked, it's a bit tacky to go find that person on other platforms or go on anon and ask why they blocked you. just move on and don't take it personally.

how to post shit

these are the buttons that let you post new shit. when you make a new post, you'll get the post editor popping up. it's actually pretty cool, hot take, but here are the important things to know:

put your post in the spot. i'm using the text post one here since i post either fanfic or nattering. you can add links to stuff, change formatting, font colors, all that. i'm not gonna get too into the weeds on that since this is a beginner guide, but there are other guides on how to do it slash you should fuck around with it a bit yourself. i will, however, show you the details of the "post now" button

post now: posts now

add to queue: tumblr has a function where it will automatically post things in your queue. you can find it in your blog detail page, which you get to via account>[click on your blog name]>queue on the right. you can change how many per day go there. a lot of people will have a cutesy queue tag (eg "i love queue" or something punny like that) so your followers will know if it's a queued post or a regular one. this is cute, but not necessary

save as draft: if you want to keep a post for later but not publish it yet, you can save it as a draft. it's in the same place as your queue, but these will stay there until you post it yourself. i do this a lot for posts that i want to keep for their information, or to save art to post for when i'm trying to break up an ocean of asks. very cool feature

post privately: this will make it so that only you can see the post. just a warning though that anything that goes online will be seen by Someone, so i wouldn't put like. deep dark secrets or your ssn here or something. (<- does not use this feature at all hahaha)

schedule: you can have the post drop on a certain time on a certain day. fun for flashbanging yourself later, or reminding yourself of something, etc.

if you put something in your post, it will be "searchable" on tumblr. that means if you have a post saying "i hate tmnt rise" then people who look for "tmnt rise" may be able to see your post. just a heads up. you can make your blog not show up in search results, but if you're someone looking to be found (e.g. a writer trying to post, or someone trying to make friends, etc.) i dont recommend you turn that on. just be aware that if you post things talking shit, you might get some people trolling you. just block them and move on.

if you click into a post, this thing will pop up. this will allow you to add a picture, a gif, a link, an audio file, a video file, a poll, or a readmore break (shortens the post like i did with this one to make it less intrusive on someone's dashboard).

etiquette note: if your post is going to be on the long side, Especially if it's a text post (for me this is around the 650-700 word mark), put it under a readmore. it's really annoying on mobile to scroll through a bunch of text. also, if you're going to post nsfw (which i will remind you, WILL show up in the public tags!) either have some kind of nsfw tag, put it under a readmore, or both.

tags

on the bottom of your post, you will see the option to tag your posts. some people don't use the tag function at all. i use it religiously. tagging serves two functions: organizing your blog, and sharing your content.

on your blog, you can search posts by tag. this is the best way to search your tumblr, which has a notoriously terrible search function. if you ever want to confidently be able to find things again, tag them something you'll remember. i have a list here of tags i use as an example for some ideas.

secondly, tumblr has a function where you can see what everyone is posting under a certain phrase. you can find this by typing a phrase into the "search tumblr" bar in the upper right. this will largely be posts that are tagged by that thing, or have tags that contain that phrase. (e.g. if you search "tmnt" you will find posts that are tagged "tmnt" but also some that are tagged "donnie tmnt"). this is how you can find new people to find, and fun art to reblog, etc. search for things you're interested in, then go through the tag and find who looks cool.

you'll also find that some people (<- me) will "talk" in the tags. the op of the post Can See These!!! so don't say anything that's rude or that you wouldn't want them to see!!! but this is a holdover of tumblr etiquette from years ago when it was considered rude to reblog art, let's say, and put your thoughts about something in the reblog as its own reblog. the old school of thought is that it disrupted the "aesthetic" of the post, so you'll see a lot of people put their commentary in the tags instead. it's not as obtrusive, but everyone can still see it. there's a joke that your tags will "pass peer review" if someone screenshots them and puts them on the post while reblogging, but that's usually something you'll see on particularly funny posts or creative posts or that sort of thing.

reblogs vs reposts

you will come across people who have "no reposts" or "don't repost my art" in their description or on their blog or on their art. there's a lot of confusion for new tumblr people on what that means.

reposting means that you are downloading the art/fic/whatever, then using the upload function and creating your own original post.

reblogging is when you take the post that the person made, and clicking on the reblog button (third one here):

reposting things is BAD because it does not give the op original credit and it makes it look like you created the thing. reblogging is GOOD because it shares art/writing/etc with the people who are following you, and encourages community. the double arrows are what keep community alive!!

on that note, likes are functionally useless. that little heart there does nothing for artist engagement. while there is a tumblr algorithm, it's terrible, doesn't really work, and! we've already turned ours off in the beginning, remember? most people will have done this. liking a post doesn't put it on your blog, it doesn't make it so that you can find it later, it doesn't boost the op's engagement. likes do the two things and only the two things:

op knows you saw the post

tumblr puts it into one giant unsearchable pile of things you've liked

that's it! so if you like a post, consider reblogging it. add that fun commentary in the tags we talked about! this is a really good way to make someone's day.

etiquette note; you'll sometimes see people who say "no spam likes". this means that they don't like it when people go through their blog and just hit like on the latest posts over and over and over. it clogs up the notification feed and makes it harder to see the engagement that actually Means something, e.g. reblogs, mentions, replies, etc. i personally don't have an issue with it since you can filter those out if you're looking for something, but if someone asks you not to do it, don't do it. also, if you do it and suddenly find that you're blocked even if you've not done anything wrong, that might be why. some people just don't like it shrug.

how to make friends

tumblr is a social media site, and while it's possible to have a great time on your own just reblogging pretty art and great fics onto your page, a lot of the joy comes from participating in community.

there's a good post here i reblogged the other day for some details, but here are some basic things for a beginner to know:

you can send messages to blogs you like called "asks". you'll find the link to it on the left of the follow button on someone's blog, and a lot of people will have changed the wording. for example, mine is called "request a song." you can send people messages, anonymously if you wish, and tumblr will let you know when the person has answered your message. they may do so publicly (which i always do!), so make sure not to put anything there you wouldn't be okay with all of their followers seeing. don't be rude. but it's the best way to start talking with someone. and most people are very excited to get messages like this!! so don't be intimidated!!

there is a dm system. most people aren't going to have it available except to people they're following, and it has a bit more of an intimate feel than an ask. personally, i only use this function for my mutuals (people whom i follow who are also following me), and i'd be willing to bet that's a common mood about it.

replies: just like you did with the post you started, you can reply to text posts. the op will see it, and you can start talking about a post without having it appear on your blog. it's a nice way to communicate without clogging up your dash/blog, and you did so perfectly!

reblogs: we already went over this, but you can also just reblog posts. the person from whom you reblog will see what you say, and op will see what you say. etiquette here is not to reblog posts if someone asks you not to, and to tag longer posts as "long post" so people on mobile who have that limited don't have to scroll as long

talk to people! be friendly! ask them about their day. if it's an author, tell them your favorite part of their last fic. ask what the inspiration was for this part or that part. i get people sending me songs in that remind them of character moments, and that's fun! draw art of your favorite scene, then tag the author in it! (to tag people, use the @ symbol, then type their username, e.g. @desceros tags me).

find people that are posting the things that you like, follow them, reblog from them, send in asks off anon when they reblog little games asking for them, just. you know. be social. that post i linked has some good ideas if you need help.

if you're coming from ao3, go to the author's profile page. a lot of us have our tumblrs linked there. go to their tumblr. follow them. send in asks about their fics. you'll often find fun fanart, or wips, or that kind of thing!

anyway i think that answered all the questions you had, but you can ask if there's something specific you were looking for i didn't touch. hope this helps!! C:

#text post #i... think that covers most of the basics. fwahh!! anyway welcome to tumblr and i hope you enjoy it! :D

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birf · 7 months

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You got any tips for traveling to Japan?

Oh yes I for sure do now

1. Learn some basic phrases to get around, especially for when buying stuff or ordering food. A few areas, especially in really touristy places, people will speak English to you, but I feel like people mostly just greet you/ask you things in Japanese regardless. And also you just wanna be polite! It’s also nice if you wanna compliment the food or people’s clothes.

You’re gonna be saying “arigatou gozaimasu” (thank you), “onegaishimasu” (please) and “sumimasen” (excuse me) a LOT

The google translate app is free and also great to use when you need!

2. Bring a coin purse

It’s still for the most part a cash based society over there. And you will collect soooo many coins. Have a little coin purse makes it easier to pull out. Also nice if you’re going to arcades. Plus all the vending machines.

Also when you’re buying stuff there will be a tray to put you’re money in and then they’ll ask if you if that’s okay before they take it. And then you say yes.

3. Pack very light on toiletries.

Unless you got some very specific products you like, convenience stores literally have everything you’d need plus they’re very cheap. All hotels and most hostiles will provide you with toiletries as well. Save the space and don’t pack them.

4. I ended getting a pasmo card to use for the subway and do not worry about the subway system being confusing. It’s also very easy to put money on your cards at the station (there’s all different language options.)

Google maps will tell you every single detail on how to get places through the subway even telling you which cart has the least amount of people. It was very easy getting around.

Don’t forget rush hour is around 7:00-9:00 AM, you will get squished.

5. You can ship you luggage to places your staying for very cheap.

My brother had to do this cause he’s moving back there so he had a lot of luggage. And it’s reallllyyy tiring to bring up and down a million stairs on the subway and so you can go to any station or hotel and ship that luggage there and it was like $10. It’s really nice if you need to do something like that.

6. Don’t bring a water bottle, but bring the best walking shoes you got.

You don’t need a water bottle cause there’s vending machines for drinks everywhere. But we were walking around 10-15 miles every day. You’re feet are gonna hurt.

7. Don’t eat and walk

Some places out on the street will even ask you where you’re going to eat the food so don’t walk away with it before they give you the food. Most konbini’s have a seating area. But if you buy food or a snack from somewhere just sit and and eat before you keep walking.

8. Always walk on the left side (unless you’re in Osaka for some reason)

Especially if you at a subway station, people are rushing, so always keep to the left. And then in Osaka it was just all on the right.

9. No trash cans outside

I’d seen a lot of people talk about how you gotta carry your trash around because there’s no trash cans outside which is trUE but you don’t gotta carry it around. Just stop in a konbini to throw away trash. Also almost all vending machines have bottle recycling next to them.

10. Always wait in the queue.

To get the subway, lines will start to form. Instead of getting in the front and waiting just by the train door be sure to get in line. There will be lines everywhere for stuff. Just make sure you’re not cutting in wait in line.

Also wait to cross the street. Even when it’s red and there’s absolutely nO cars around anywhere. You still wait for it to turn green. Just another polite thing.

11. Some more subway etiquette that I think of:

Keep an eye for elderly and disabled people coming onto the train to give you seat to. You can say “dozo” (go ahead) and gesture to the seat. There will even be signs on the trains explaining to do this but it is something that did happen a lot, also just the right thing to do so.

Don’t talk on the phone or eat on the train. Also just don’t talk loudly in general on the train. It’s mostly very quiet.

Anddddd this is all I can think of for now lol. Hope this helps!

#Japan #Japan travel #travel tips

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bakubabes-tatakae · 8 months

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Welcome to Kinktober 2023 everyone. 👏 Enjoy 31 days of pure smut next month. We're officially in our third year of this beautiful time. 😈This year's pieces won't be full-length like I've been trying to do because I know it's a lot harder to get them done that way, but I'll make them as long as I can for you guys. And we're changing things up. I order to make sure I get something out from all of the blogs we're gonna be doing this as a collaboration.😙

If you want to be added to the taglist simply DM me, shoot me an ask, or even reply to this post. 🙌 I can add you to only certain characters, the whole thing, or only certain kinks. Can’t wait for everyone to see what we’ll be getting up to this year. 😉 Age must be in bio or easily found to be added to the taglist.

If you don’t want to see the Kinktober stuff for this year then simply blacklist the tag: #bakubabes kinktober

Now take a peek at what’s to come in a month. 👇 If the date looks like this then that means that the piece is in the queue and waiting for your viewing pleasure. I’ll link them here as they release as well.

Left To Complete Before Release: (18/31)

Day 1 - Gagging || Tobio Kageyama || "Haikyuu!!" by @bakubabes-tatakae

Day 2 - Massages || Eren Yeager || "Attack On Titan" by @yeagerdaydreams

Day 3 - Ownership || Megumi Fushiguro || "Jujutsu Kaisen" by @megumidreams

Day 4 - Desperation || Ken "Draken" Ryuguji || "Tokyo Revengers" by @drakendaydreams

Day 5 - Wall Sex || Shouta Aizawa || "Boku No Hero Academia" by @bakubabes-princess

Day 6 - Hurt/Comfort Sex || Renji Abarai || "Bleach" by @seireiteiqueen

Day 7 - Cunnilingus || Zora Ideale || "Black Clover" by @idealedreamer

Day 8 - Anal Sex || Beelzebub || "Obey Me" by @beelzebubspethuman

Day 9 - Cum Marking || Kiba Inuzuka || "Naruto" by @bakubabes-tatakae

Day 10 - First Times || Connie Springer || "Attack On Titan" by @yeagerdaydreams

Day 11 - Face-Fucking || Megumi Fushiguro || "Jujutsu Kaisen" by @megumidreams

Day 12 - Cock Warming || Ken "Draken" Ryuguji || Tokyo Revengers by @drakendaydreams

Day 13 - Public Sex || Katsuki Bakugou || "Boku No Hero Academia" by @bakubabes-princess

Day 14 - Hair Pulling || Renji Abarai || "Bleach" by @seireiteiqueen

Day 15 - Tit-Fucking || Zora Ideale || "Black Clover" by @idealedreamer

Day 16 - Master/Slave || Beelzebub || "Obey Me" by @beelzebubspethuman

Day 17 - Power Play || Benimaru Shinmon || "Fire Force" by @bakubabes-tatakae

Day 18 - Shotgunning || Porco Galliard || "Attack On Titan" by @yeagerdaydreams

Day 19 - Overstimulation || Megumi Fushiguro || "Jujutsu Kaisen" by @megumidreams

Day 20 - Hand Job || Ken "Draken" Ryuguji || "Tokyo Revengers" by @drakendaydreams

Day 21 - Phone Sex || Katsuki Bakugou || "Boku No Hero Academia" by @bakubabes-princess

Day 22 - Mirror Sex || Renji Abarai || "Bleach" by @seireiteiqueen

Day 23 - Tattoos || Zora Ideale || "Black Clover" by @idealedreamer

Day 24 - Lingerie || Beelzebub || "Obey Me" by @beelzebubspethuman

Day 25 - Shower Sex || Izaya Orihara || "Durarara!!" by @bakubabes-tatakae

Day 26 - Handcuffs || Eren Yeager || "Attack On Titan" by @yeagerdaydreams

Day 27 - Dry Humping || Megumi Fushiguro || "Jujutsu Kaisen" by @megumidreams

Day 28 - Breast Worship || Ken "Draken" Ryuguji || "Tokyo Revengers" by @drakendaydreams

Day 29 - Spanking || Katsuki Bakugou || "Boku No Hero Academia" by @bakubabes-princess

Day 30 - Face-Sitting || Renji Abarai || "Bleach" by @seireiteiqueen

Day 31 - Somnophilia || Beelzebub || "Obey Me" by @beelzebubspethuman

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leopardom · 28 days

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✨ sappy post incoming ✨

(and a little trigger warrning for the vague mention of suicide)

i’m not gonna do any gig reports for now because last week still feels like a fever dream and i can’t really put my thoughts in an order that makes sense. but i just wanted to stop by to say how much i love the vibes and creativity of this fandom and how happy everyone was when it came to meeting and trading/giving out their creations while queueing for the gigs or even when they were over

in Munich, Milan and Padova i got to meet so many people from here. with some of them i chatted more and with some others less. but in any case it absolutely warmed my heart to finally see all those people i see on tumblr but like, in real life! i got to trade my stickers for bracelets/stickers/art/fan stuff, got to see everyone have a good laugh because of my stuff and also got to complement people for their crafts. and i'm telling you i really meant every single word because as i already mentioned, i love the creativity of this fandom 💕

last weekend i began my trip with pretty much nothing on me and now i'm back home with a bag full of bracelets, a folder full of art and a heart so full i wanna cry. i mean look at that:

1) idek where to begin with the tags of the artists, i’m still confusion but i’ll try to come back to this post again later with a clearer mind

2) “big juicy” bracelet you will always be famous @greensolsikke <3

this last week was a tiring experience with many ups and downs but at the same time it was probably the best week of my life so far

i'm getting especially emotional about it all because this whole frenzy concided with my birthday (on the 29th of March). this may sound cringe or what, but on the actual day of my birthday and when everything was over, i was sitting alone on my hotel bed in Milan and was thinking how this last year of my life started in the worst way possible and how it was only escallating towards the worst every single day. during my 26 i reached a new level of low, a bottom lower than the one i had reached when i was 20-21 (and that was a bad bad time). and yes, there were a few times when i was close to ending it all because it was too much. my 26 was pretty much like hell

but now i'm glad i didn't give up and pushed through all the struggles. because if i hadn't, i wouldn't be able to experience last week. i wouldn't be able to see some of my dearest friends again, to meet all the amazing people from here and from twitter, to see one of my favourite bands perform for three nights in-a-row and to listen to all my fave songs of theirs live and even cry my eyes out to some of them (Barve Oceana in Munich, Padam in Milan and Metulji in Padova really were an Experience). can safely say that my 26 ended with a bang and it was a very good one 😌

i'm feeling sad that this is over but at the same time i'm so warm inside and so happy that it happened. and i would do it all over again, especially if it meant meeting you all again or meeting even more of you from in here. i have never felt so welcome by people who technically only knew me as a tumblr user and i never thought this would happen, considering how awkward i am when it comes to interacting with people online and in real life

anyway i think i've talked too much and i'm slowly loosing my train of thought because the thoughts and emotions are so many right now. i just wanna thank each and every single one of you for making the past week so special and one of the best weeks of my life. i'm beyond gratefull 💖

sincerely, the curly head with the meme stickers 🫶

#okay this is long but i had to do it #i needed to do it #i miss last week so much already :(#this is emma speaking #joker out

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idoltime · 12 hours

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Idol Time’s Second Episode featuring ATLAS’ Sim Haedam (@svtlas), aired on March 22nd, 2024 with the shows returning and permanent host, Everlast’s Cody. Once again, the video earned quick attention and was trending #3 for weeks after its initial release which was a big success for show itself.

Cody appears on screen immediately after the intro is played and the bright Idol Time logo is shown, and similar to last episode, queue cards in one hand and mic in the other, with an overstretched smile replacing the previous blank expression he wore.

“Hi, and welcome back to Idol Time! The only interview show you need to tune in for and quite possibly the best show you’ve ever seen. Obviously hosted by me, Cody!”

“I’d just like to thank everyone for the support on the first episode, like, if I didn’t feel famous before, I really feel it now and all that funny stuff. Now, let’s introduce the second guest of our show ATLAS’ Haedam!”

Cody lets a dramatic pause pass before signalling for Haedam to enter the room. He does so with a small smile and raises both his hands to wave excitedly as he walks towards his seat.

“Hello! As you already know, my name is Haedam and I am the maknae of the seventeen subunit ATLAS and formerly a member of X1!” They both clap at Haedam’s introduction before Cody raises the mic to his mouth. “Welcome, Haedam. Anything you’d like the viewers to know about you?” He questions.

“Uhm…I like playing the guitar sometimes, baking, and hanging out with my members. Oh, and I’m really interested in building legos! I also have type one diabetes, I don’t think that's been mentioned before but I’m super excited to be here! I love interviews and stuff!”

Cody smiles in response to Haedam’s energy and flips over to the next queue card for the next set of questions.

“You’ve told both me and the viewers you were a former X1 member, so how was the survival show experience for you?” Haedam sighs, looking a little uneasy at the mention of the topic.

He swallows, visibly uncomfortable, whilst he finds his words. "It was fun....overall i think? but there were definitely parts that were really awful. They focused more about our performances and stuff than anything else. if we were sick... it didn't matter. It sucked. I don't think I would do it again."

Cody silently nods in agreement, knowing exactly how Haedam felt at the time.

“Personally, I think all future survival shows should be banned, period. But nobody’s gonna listen to me anyways, guys, trust me when I say they are not all that fun. Anyways, how’d it feel to place 3rd out of all those people? That’s a pretty high rank.”

Haedam’s face softens at the slight change in topic, seemingly quite proud of himself. "It felt really good! I was so proud of myself! Of course like, it would've been cool to be first but like, I'm grateful to have made it at all."

He grins. “I was honestly so surprised, it felt unreal to know that I had done a good enough job to make it through to the end.”

“How’d it feel when X1 disbanded, was it a big moment for you?” Cody asks.

Haedam’s eyes fixate themselves on the pattern of the floor as he talks, "Woah. I mean, I cried a lot. It was really scary because I didn't do anything wrong and it felt like I was being punished. I made a lot of friends in x1 and it hurt to have them taken away from me."

The room goes silent for a little, with Cody fumbling around with the order of the queue cards until he finally gets them in the correct sequence.

“It must’ve been a tough time for you to deal with, especially since X1 was your first group but you were given a second chance as a seventeen sub-unit. How did it feel when you knew ATLAS would be debuting?”

"I was so happy to have another chance. but i was so scared about it. I had a lot of anxiety because I felt like I had some type of curse, and that maybe my new group would disband suddenly too because I was in it. I love my group members, they reassured me a lot and helped me feel better about it."

“That's great, I’m glad you’re having a better time with ATLAS. But rumour has it, you were rigged into the X1 lineup, is that true?”

Haedam’s face contorts to one of shock, horrified that anyone would ever think that about him.

"I really wasn't rigged in, guys. I promise I have the papers here."

Now, Cody looks around, surprised at Haedam’s last few words.

“Wait—How did you even manage to get something like that?” Haedam shrugs, laughing it off.

“Don’t worry too much about it. I asked for these after X1 disbanded because I felt like it was maybe my fault but it wasn't....if anything maybe I was ranked lower than I should have been."

Cody laughs along with him, “Okay, fair enough. Any scandals you want to talk about?”

“Other than the X1 scandals people don't really make a lot of bad news that trend about me? at least ones that i want to address. So, thank you?"

“You’re lucky,” Cody responds and Haedam lets out a small hum. “Before we end the interview, any extra things you need to say or any upcoming projects?”

Haedam grasps onto his mic. “I wanna say hi to my old X1 members if they're listening! Hi guys! I miss you all! and hi to my hyungs because they're definitely watching! It's supposed to be a secret...but we may or may not have a comeback coming soon. You guys didn't hear it from me though."

Cody’s face brightens, “Well, it is comeback season. Now, some final words for the viewers of this episode?”

Haedam waves frantically and quickly thinks before answering.

“Bye everyone! Thank you so much for listening to me! Please keep tuning into idol time because it's really cool! Have a great day!"

Cody copies Haedam’s wave as they wave in sync, “I couldn’t have said it better myself, see you next episode!” The video cuts to the bright blue logo before fading out into darkness once more.

#EPISODES!#fake kpop addition #fake kpop company #fake kpop group #fake kpop idol #fake kpop member #fake kpop oc #fictional idol community #fictional idol group #fictional idol oc #kpop addition #kpop

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archduke-enver-gortash · 1 month

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gortash 1, 6, 7

zeke 3, 4, 5

(hi! i realised i had this finished but it was rotting in my drafts so i’m gonna queue this for my short absence lol.) i mean. gortash isn’t an oc but sure why not lol. you can always send me asks about him actually <3

1. What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do?

just sitting still? not a problem. his problem comes with finding something like this to be an utterly wasteful way to spend your time. i think even when he gets done with work for the day earlier than planned (which doesn’t happen often because his plans are so meticulous. usually some incident like someone he was meeting with unexpectedly not being able to attend was the cause here which he. doesn’t like because interruptions in schedule bad lol) he usually finds some other way to be productive. (like spending time in his workshop or drawing for example.)

but uh. how long would he be able to sit still? if a plan of his for some reason required him to sit still and do nothing for a fucking week, he’d gnash his teeth about it but he’d be able to do that and much more—everything that’s necessary will be done. otherwise? you absolutely will not catch him just lounging around lmao.

6. Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable?

definitely immovable 100%. there’s just a teeny tiny problem with this—this applies to his system only, his way of viewing the world, his values and laws for himself and the laws and values he inherently imposes on others. he considers himself a man who does whatever is necessary, and more importantly the only one who is capable of actually deciding on and carrying out order. judge, jury and executioner, y’know. his word is law and his word is what he will stick to until the very end and everyone else better follow suit if they don’t want to be mentally branded as a mistake by him lol. i think he sees it as there being a universal way the world should work, which is the system of the machine with him as the core, it’s just everyone else that doesn’t see this ‘truth’ at the moment & needs fixing.

7. What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling?

to me, gortash is a man of the future. yes, he does so enjoy taking his trophies from past conquests and yes, he does not forget the past, dissecting and learning is a process that includes his past as well as others’ he so loves to dissect and use in his schemes, but i simply don’t see him as someone who would ever wallow in feelings like nostalgia. it’s not even that he doesn’t want to, he just doesn’t experience it in the first place.

to sort of illustrate what i mean: i think he definitely remembers his coronation to become archduke as a grand stepping stone in his plan and all, but that’s what being a man of the future and baldur’s gate’s saviour means, it’s exactly that—a stepping stone for more. he won’t simply rest on the steps now when he has so many more to climb. and when you’re at the top of the stairs, there is no need to look back either.

3. How do they put themselves to bed at night (reading, singing, thinking?)

not at all uhhhhhh. only joking. well. only half-joking? zeke, due to his paranoia about everything surrounding gortash, the nightmares that result from that & just his nature as someone who never fucking stops being on his feet, has insane troubles sleeping. with his severe malnutrition and lack of sleep just result in the biggest eye bags known to man. more like eye trenches or whatever.

anyways, the solution is just uhm. going so hard until he eventually passes out and then repeat that process. 😬. later on when he does finally trust his companions enough to eat a bit around them, shadowheart laces his food with a sleeping potion because she hasn’t seen him rest for more than half an hour consecutively and he understandably gets triggered (gortash never put mind-altering drugs into zeke’s food, stuff made him sick for example was what was commonly used instead, because he needs him to be aware of his own suffering to enjoy it, but. still.) because of it. so. not ideal.

4. How easy is it to earn their trust? & 5. How easy is it to earn their mistrust?

i’m just gonna combine these into one bigger answer hope that’s okay 👍 so, every single thing starts out with lots of mistrust from zeke lmao. and yes, i don’t just mean every person, i mean everything, even objects he has never seen before or shit like that. but there’s still multiple levels of mistrust, there’s again the basic mistrust everyone gets, and then there’s mistrust as in ‘you’ve given me a sign (and this truly might be fucking nothing. it most often is nothing. this boy is insane) that you’re working for gortash and i am now immediately killing you’ 😬 and then there’s of course the ‘AAAAHHHHHH WHAT ARE YOU’ level exclusively reserved for mr gortash himself.

to gain his trust, you have to approach it a little bit like you would with a feral kitten except a lot more careful because this thing can actually kill you before you even know that he went for the killing blow if you do something wrong. you have to essentially let him sniff you out, sometimes metaphorically and sometimes literally, assure him that you’re not a threat to him. no sudden movements, loud noises or other similar actions and you’ll be good. he’ll still be on high alert, but is out of ‘kill once it gets within 10 metres’ mode lmao. and that’s basically it. building trust with him is an extremely slow, hard & painful (most often for the party that isn’t zeke) process and honestly? it’s not worth it considering YOU can never fully trust him not to suddenly feel his entire being scream to hunt & kill you. i’ve made this comparison before but it’s essentially like one of those people on taking an animal like a lynx or a chimpanzee into their home. they’ll probably get used to you and maybe even trust you, but they’re still wild animals at the end of the day. wild animals who can and will, if you’re not careful, severely hurt or even kill you if. zeke is the wild and the wild is zeke and all haha.

the methods to earn his trust and mistrust are both not very complex, but while earning his trust is a slow, never sure and stable thing, earning his mistrust is quick and very, very easy in comparison. once again, just one sign that you’re a threat, one wrong movement at the wrong time and you’re out. and this behaviour is just his base instincts as the apex predator and all. like how i described earlier, zeke also has SO many gortash related triggers on top of all that already. for example, telling him that his eyes are beautiful! they just are objectively extraordinary, so you most likely just want to genuinely compliment him! it’s rough. zeke is awful. end essay.

#bg3 #enver gortash #oc: zeke #gortash #baldur's gate 3 #gortash & zeke #the dark urge

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godbirdart · 1 year

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any tips/reassurance for when u have lots of owed art (comms, trades, etc)? i get stressed over making people wait too long sometimes with just a few things on my list. u manage to make SO MUCH stuff for patreon and personal work combined each year?? must be magic no other way /pos

let me start with saying:

people are [generally] more than okay waiting for art!

you are one person. you can get sick, have emergencies, and you also need personal time as well! you're not a company, and most clients are very understanding of that. there will always be the one odd client that's impatient, yes. it does happen. but as long as you are transparent, communicate, and [as a bonus] have a public queue - you really have no reason to fret.

i have commissioned artists that took three days to finish art. i have commissioned artists that took three months to finish art. there is no "standard" turnaround time when it comes to commissions. every artist works at different paces, not every artist is self-employed. some have school or jobs that take away time from their art, and that’s fine! it is okay to take a long time to finish your work! just be honest.

let me elaborate [i’m gonna say client a lot but these can also apply to trades]

be transparent: if you know it'll take you a while to finish the art, write that in your commission post and/or order form when you open. make that the very first thing the client knows before any payment is exchanged. i like to write it in my order form and in my first email back when i'm taking on a commission, as it covers my butt and keeps the client in the know.

public queue: set up a trello or make a post/journal somewhere [such as furaffinity or deviantart] where your clients can go and see the progress of their work. if they can go check where they’re at in the queue there, they won’t have to stress you out by having to send you an email every week for updates.

answer in a timely manner: i have an autoresponder set up for my email. it lets clients know that a) i got their message and b) i’ll respond to them within a couple business days [if there are no other delays / holidays]. it takes away the stress of having to drop everything and answer my client right then in there, as much as my adhd brain panics and wants to do that. it also reassures the client that their messages are getting through and that they aren’t getting ghosted if i don’t respond for a day or two.

if there’s going to be a delay, tell your client asap! if you have an emergency that’ll impact your work, tell your client as soon as possible. you do not have to go into personal details, just be honest and say “hey, there’s been an unexpected event that’ll cause a delay in updates. i will try and get an update to you as soon as i’m able. thank you for your patience!” and leave it at that. the majority of your clients will be understanding and grateful for the update.

be professional. a little professionalism goes a long way. you can be more lax with trades as usually you're doing that with friends, but if a client checks in to see the status of their commission maybe write "thanks for checking in! here's what i've got so far" and attach a WIP or "thank you for checking in! i don't have an update for you yet but will try and get one to you soon! thank you for your patience!". some artists merely say "i don't have an update sorry", and sure that does work, but it may come off dismissive to your client and they're not going to feel great about waiting. it's okay to not have an update yet when messaging people back! just be honest about it.

if you’ve bitten off more than you can chew: refund them. it's not bad business if you have to refund a client. if you find you've taken on more work than you can handle, or just cannot fulfill a client's commission - you absolutely have the option to simply refund them. be sincere, apologize for their time, thank them for considering you, and tell them you hope they'll consider commissioning you again in the future.

i hope this reassures you a bit! i 100000% understand the stress from making people wait in the queue for a long time. i’m the exact same way!! but rest assured they’re not going to get mad at you for having to wait. like i’ve already said multiple times; just communicate and be transparent and you’ll be fine!

#and ye nightmare clients sadly DO Happen #but they aren't that common #good clients know you're only human just trying to live

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twothpaste · 24 days

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1, 11, 27, 48 for the fanfic meme?

1. Do you daydream a lot before you write, or go for it as soon as the ideas strike? Aw I'm bigly a daydreamer. My ideas usually spend a lottttt of time marinating in my head, and in my outline docs, before I get around to writing them. Whenever I get an idea there's always like 3 things ahead of it in my "shit to write" queue, so it simmers on the back burner for months or longer. Which is nice actually, cuz I like to make sure it's really a concept I can commit to before starting… If it can stand the test of time (I'm still daydreaming about it months later, I came up with more scenes/details in the meantime, it developed a Meaning or a Theme, etc) then I know it's a keeper.

2. Do you write scenes in order, or do you jump around? All in order, start to finish. Knowing how my brain works, I'm deathly afraid that if I designate some scenes as more appealing to write than others, and write those first? I'll never ever feel like going back to write the ones I decided were boring / difficult / underdeveloped in comparison 🫠. So I try to just approach every scene indiscriminately like "ok, how am I gonna make this one fun to write & compelling to read?" Makes it more straightforward for my anxious little head. (And fun too?? Genuinely I almost never find myself dreading a scene, or stuck on a scene I don't wanna write.) I'll constantly stop to hash out the narrative significance / foreshadowing / etc in my notes as I go, I'm jumpin' all over the place as I outline, but the work itself is a straight shot.

3. What area of writing do you feel strongest in? Characterrrrs, maybeee??? Specifically like, their relationships & interactions. I feel a special kinda magic when I get 2 characters bouncing off each other, complimenting or contrasting, highlighting traits & beliefs you might not've uncovered otherwise. And I feel like I can pull it off with almost any combination of characters, if I cram 'em in a room together. Folks tell me I'm good at characterization (thank y'all 😭!!!) - but I feel like it's more than just personality bullet points in an isolated void - strong characterization really comes from those chemical reactions that take place when blorpy interacts & orients themself against others. That's the shit I could think about & write about all day, at least, and hopefully I think maybe I manage it pretty well.

4. Who is your favorite character to write for? Has this changed since you’ve started writing for that fandom? It Is Probably Claus, And I Am Being So Fucking Brave About It. It's funny too, cuz when I started writing Mother stuff I was like "no claus lives AUs for me haha no sir." (🙃) In 2021 my fav character to write was probably Lucas, and he's still in like 1.000001st place, and still my fav character ever, so it's fine, like. It's ok. It's fine.

[ ask meme here ]

#thank youuu hehe #ask tag

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xaz-fr · 2 years

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Afamiliars beware

since I’m banned I don’t really care anymore. Buckle up, its long and I’m not gonna put it under a read more because :))) these girls have broken my spirit for the last time.

If you’ve ever seen a community around called Afamiliar: don’t join it :)))

For those who don’t know what Afams is. Its where you can order a little drawing of a familiar from FR and it comes with unique colors and markings and can dress it up, breed, it and scavenge with it. Artists make them in a queue and fill orders as they come in.*

The admins are INCREDIBLY toxic. They can’t take any sort of criticism and they play favorites with who and how people get punished. You aren’t even allowed to say you’re unhappy about anything. Ever. Or if you do you get a strike. If you call out the team or admin’s hypocritical behavior you get a strike. If you stand up for yourself when the admins are clearly doing these things you get a strike.

I was part of Afamiliars for two years and was part of the team for a year and during that time I watched the entire thing fall apart. They really try to make it seem like they’re one big family but its just not true. The admins and owners Myndris and Sketchanie are both pretty toxic and talk about people, members of their community and their staff of artists and other team members, behind their back and make snide comments about them constantly. And while everyone else is held accountable to the rules neither of them or their friends are. Myndris talked so much shit about someone she had the entire team convinced they were a terrible person just because they didn’t like some art they got. The best part is when the admins agree with you about things you have problems with in Afamiliars in private over DMs and then publicly renounce everything you say. So hypocritical AND completely two faced. My absolute favorite :)

I was fired from my position as artist in July because another team member antagonized me into telling them to shut the fuck up because I wanted to be able to have open dialogues about the actual stuff that was bothering me. I ended up leaving for a week I was so furious at the state of things and why the admin team had such shitty conflict resolution. No negativity. Nothing in any way could be perceived as negative or you got a strike, so long as you weren’t a friend of the Admins. If you were they’d just tell you to stop. It was full on ‘no war in Ba Sing Sa’ in the Afams server and still is. Which is why I left and then for a week not a single member of staff reached out to me to see if I was okay. In fact after I left the community noticed and they started deleting messages asking what happened and where I was and where I’d gone and why I’d left. Their most prolific artist had just LEFT and the only way they thought to respond was to delete every message that asked what happened. :)))) They also lied to the team about how many strikes I had and my ‘behavior issues’ to convince them to vote me out. Which is hilarious bc there are way worse actors in the team than me.

But saying anything that might be slightly confrontational got you a warning or a strike. So it was literally impossible to have any sort of adult conversations that might make people upset. Things that had been bothering me for seven months. Things the admins agreed with and refused to do anything about. They just let it sit. And stew. Agreeing with all the problems you have with X thing in private while publicly acting like it wasn’t a problem at all.

They also don’t listen to feedback like... at all. I’m not expecting anyone to be perfect and I know we’re all only human but they keep making the same comedy of errors again. And again. And again. To the point that now they’re two most popular artists are either gone, or about to be gone. They’d been given feedback from multiple people multiple times about how a trial mod on the team makes certain people uncomfortable and instead of removing that person they doubled down on them and did not remove them. And then when people went to other admins about the problem THAT WAS SHARED with the person in question. Admin specific information saying how people were uncomfortable with someone with that person. Probably with their name attached. When I brought THAT to an admin again nothing was done.

In the past few months I’ve just watched the team and the server completely fucking implode. The admins doubling down on zero negativity even as more and more people realize... something isn’t right. More people, people I don’t even talk to!, mention things that are a bit more aggressive than the admins would like. Someone even got muted on the server for telling a mod that an admin had dealt with the problem and the mod was then continuing to antagonize the original problem; which is against the rules. Someone got harassed over DMs by another member, asked where they could submit a report and posted proof of it, and they were the one given the strike and told that the admins do not moderate DMs. But they do sometimes feel the need to moderate and condone certain discord servers run by people they don’t like :) Which is a true thing.

In the past week the second most prolific artist left because one of the admins called the afams everyone makes ‘a miserable pile of pixels’ in reference to how much drama they get in the server and feedback form. This obviously upset some people and so said artist is taking a break for a month. I know she’s not a fool. She also sees what’s happening. She might go back but I doubt it and I hope she’s much less stressed out whatever she chooses to do. Then another artist stepped down the next day. Then just today a third artist stepped down, both of which were admins. So within a week 3 artists felt the need to step down to focus on themselves and mental health issues.

I’ve never attacked any of these people by the way except when they say shit about me that is categorically untrue. Or they show up trying to bully me. Which they also do. I was friends with all these people in the team while I was on the team until one day they just decided I wasn’t :) Not allowed to be friends with the admins anymore if you call them out on their hypocrisy.

And then today they finally banned me from the server. Which I wasn’t really a part of anyway and didn’t participate in much. And people have said worse and done worse to the team and admins but because I’m the designated server villain everything I do is worse.

This is why I was banned

from the latest admin artist that stepped down after giving their message they were stepping down. And I said ‘that seems pretty call-outy and overly negative to me’ which is... against all the rules on the server. But I’m the villain. So I’m not allowed to point it out.

The other admin said this to me pointing out that THIS ADMIN was breaking the site rules

Even tho I’ve legit gotten a strike just for saying ‘I don’t like this thing you’ve done. I’m not gonna talk about it but I want you to know I don’t like this decision you’ve made’. And these rules also exist in the team only area and it says that NO ONE is exempt. And I said as much. Because that’s bullshit.

At least unless you’re the owner’s wife. Than you can do whaaaatever you want :)

But yeah. Fuck Afamiliars. I’ve seen the writing on the wall for the past year. They’re gonna implode, or explode, and the admins are gonna be busy finger pointing at everyone but themselves for the problems. In Sketch’s stepping down message she said this exactly

I understand there have been many fuck ups on our end, and I apologize for those, but we have always strived to learn from those mistakes. And I'd like to think that we do a little better each time.

Which is not what I’ve seen the past few months. Instead they’ve doubled down on Being Right at all costs, not listening to community feedback, lashing out at people who call them out on their bullshit and hypocrisy and I know they still talk shit about their community members in DMs with their stooges.

It’s been a BEAUTIFUL fireball to watch the past 3 months since I was fired.

*Lots of artists don’t actually fill their orders. They just let their queues fill up into huge ribbons on trello and then once a month maybe fill 1-4 orders. One artist has been around 10 months and made so little art their orders can’t even fill 4 pages on discord search. So you’re stuck waiting months, or sometimes YEARS, for a project you want to fill. A friend of mine just gave up on a project because they’d been waiting two and a half years. But the queues on all artists except for maybe... idk, 3-4 artists (including me at the time) were so slow you would be waiting and waiting and legitimately no progress was made. There used to be a rule of 1 afam a week to keep queues moving but sometime around the time Sketch decided to stop making afams that rule was quietly removed.

#flight rising #afamiliars

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cookinguptales · 7 months

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okay so it's about a week until I leave the country for over a month. I am dutifully filling up my queue so y'all will stay entertained while I am gone, but I should probably state for the record that I may not be easy to get ahold of while I'm gone. if you really want me to see something, send me a tumblr chat/ask so it'll show up in a separate inbox from my notifications.

I'll probably post about some travel stuff here, if I'm not too tired, but I suspect the lion's share will end up on twitter and especially instagram. if you would like to see travel posts, I am @iletaitunefois on twitter and @cookinguptales on IG.

if you do not want to see travel posts, please block '#the travel bug'.

I'm also gonna offer up postcards again. I'm not going to make any promises because I don't know how easy it'll be for me to find time/post offices everywhere I go in Japan -- and also because I may be cursed; I think like only half of my Christmas cards actually made their way to their destinations last year.

But! If you do want a postcard, send me a private message and I'll add you to my list. If you have any special requests (locations, nature, cityscapes, cute characters, whatever) lmk and I can see if I can make that work, but again, no promises. I usually keep track of nearby post offices in Japan because they're good places for foreigners to withdraw money, but like. I'm also not gonna take a ton of time out of my trip to find a post office, y'know? Certain legs of the trip will probably be easier than others for that.

FINALLY, if you want to know more about the trip before you decide to follow my IG or ask for a postcard (or, if like me, you are simply nosy) here's a vague overview of the trip:

The first couple weeks of the trip, I'll actually be on the ocean. There's this thing that cruise lines do called "repositioning cruises" where they literally just sail across the ocean. This is so a cruise company can use a ship in a different location, generally. Like if they usually use a boat in the Caribbean, but during another time of the year want to use it in the Pacific, they still need to get it over there. And why not let people ride it during the journey?

The trip is really more pragmatic than it is designed for tourists, though, so they tend to be very cheap. They're long, there aren't a lot of stops, they tend to be during unpopular travel times... So long story short, we can take a two week cruise to Japan for like... half the cost of a plane ticket to Japan. And my mother and I can work from wherever and my father and my aunt are retired, so. We'll just. be in the Pacific Ocean for two weeks. lmao

(I've moved around my work schedule so I probably won't have to do much work in Japan, but I'll have to work on the boat. ;;)

There will be one stop at the beginning of the trip (Alaska) and one at the end (Hokkaido!!!!!) so that'll be fun! But for the most part, I will mostly be working and writing and vegging out on the boat. I'm downloading a lot of tv now because boats tend to have minimal internet. lmao

(And don't worry, we chose a boat that has vax and testing requirements! Which... will probably make it safer than SEPTA here in Philly...)

Once we're in Japan, though, we're really gonna be putting our JR passes to the test. Here's a not exhaustive list of places we're going and things we're doing, in no particular order. (I... tend not to let people know exactly where I am until I've left that place lmao.)

Tokyo (obviously)

Kyoto

Osaka

Nara (to see the shosoin)

Yamagata

Two different onsen towns

Yokohama

Takarazuka 😎 iykyk

Tokyo Disneyland/DisneySea

Wakayama

Kawagoe

Maybe Hakone depending on weather

various Halloween-themed meals in Tokyo and Halloween itself in Dotonbori

several very sacred mountains to learn about shugendo

castles!! and more shrines and temples than you can shake a stick at

Asahi tour (for dad haha)

sumo stable tour (also for dad)

Pokemon stuff (.... also for dad lmao)

seein some cute animals

a lot of interesting food!!!

tbh we're going to be exhausted, but there's a lot of train travel and easy days in there so we can rest then. (dad and I both love trains lmao) Dad actually hurt himself about a month ago, so I took out some of the stuff I was planning that involved more walking (like the old pilgrimage route in Wakayama, climbing Nokogiriyama, and the monkey park in Jigokudani) so that'll also prevent me from overdoing it too much.

part of me is like "wow this is too much you should scale back and save responsibly" but a lot of my trip is gonna be subsidized by my family in return for translating for them all and arranging everything, and we're gonna save money in lodging and such, so I'm just. gonna tell my brain to shut up and enjoy living before we die lmao.

(when you grew up really poor, it can be kind of hard to let go and allow yourself to enjoy nice things when you're older and more stable financially lmao. but I'm getting better at it!)

also, I'm gonna bring Glen! my little Tabikaeru frog! we'll go to Kusatsu Onsen together lmao.

#the travel bug

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finniestoncrane · 2 years

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PLEASE tell about your idealized version of capullo riddler! I’m starving to hear more about him

ok i moved this up the queue because i am OBSESSED with him like i love him and i love you BUT ANYWAY i reserve the right to be as unhinged about this man as i want to be. every other riddler has his pros, but this asshole has only cons and that's why he's top of my list so like please don't read this if you're gonna psychoanalyse me, i am at peace with my issues (can't wait to show this to my therapist)

Headcanons about Capullo!Riddler (w/female partner) request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi minors DNI!! 🔞 cw for nsfw stuff, heavy on the kinks, rough play, impact, slapping, choking, humiliation, degradation all that nasty shit i am projecting it onto this sideburned loser who i love with all of my soul nobody come at me for how i want to be treated at him

domestic life

you're not so much a partner as you are a live in servant

your name is babe now

"babe will you get me a beer"

"babe will you pass me the remote"

"babe can you order us pizza?"

"babe can you come sit in my lap"

unintentional misogyny is rife

better invest in thick pants or something because anytime you walk by him your ass is getting smacked

needs you to tell him how talented and smart and handsome and charming he is at least 20 times each day

his needs have to come first because "i'm the riddler and i'm super important you wouldn't understand"

has to be talked down from asking every hot person you see if they wanna have a threesome with you guys

pisses with the door open constantly

follows you around like a lost puppy because he needs attention/closeness/not to be alone with his thoughts

he won't cook or clean or do any kind of domestic chore because that's your job because what else are you bringing to the table

he will make fun of you for participating in hobbies he thinks are dumb

but god help you if you imply at any point that his obsession with batman is unhealthy and really dorky and bordering on a crush

he will go in a huff

he goes in huffs a lot

man is permanently pouting and upset

definition of 'can dish it out but can't take it'

he has two modes for asking you to pay attention to him

demanding and rude

whiny and pathetic

sometimes he switches between both

if he thinks he's ever crossed a line and really pissed you off (which is rare) he will try to make it up to you

but he's shitty at it

he'll bump his head against you like a cat repeating "i'm sorry" until you're so annoyed that you forgive him to get him to shut up

he thinks burps are super funny because mentally he's fuckin 12

sex life

he's super horny, like all the time, concerningly so

like if you don't have the energy to fuck, you could at least sit in his lap and participate in some cock-warming, god

he'll eat pussy once a month, but he expects his dick to be sucked twice daily

he's super into dishing out some humiliation and degrading his partner

gives him an ego boost

because he's super self-conscious

mostly about his dick size

loves being a bit physically violent during sex

hair pulling, face slapping, grabbing and biting

spanking for sure

likes being called daddy/master/sir

anything that denotes him as an authority figure

surprisingly encouraging though

will dole out some praise if he thinks you deserve it

never says you're beautiful or pretty or gorgeous

but tells you you're hot all the time

super into free use, since you're there y'know

that's really all you're good for to him

will fuck you until he cums and not even check to see if you finished

rolls over and falls asleep straight away

he also snores

insists on getting nudes sent from you if he's away from you for an hour

boasts about how good he is at fucking in front of everyone and anyone

and you have to agree

which you do

and it's the only time he ever says thank you

but only in private

#finnie writes #riddler #batman #riddler imagine #friends being friends #zero year riddler #zero year!riddler #capullo riddler #capullo!riddler

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xian-1502 · 2 months

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Splatoon stuff

Side order to me (and probably only me) is somewhat disappointing. Don’t get me wrong, it’s probably gonna be my most played mode from henceforth and i always love a good rougelite sandbox, but there’s just too many strings attached, and not enough build control. Like my main gripe is how you can’t even just create a palette of your own weapon and preferred chip combo or easily make a build without having to jump through the hoops of max bias and weapon type you probably don’t wanna play. Like each weapon can become an uber powerful murder machine by all rights but sometimes i just don’t want to have to play a weapon im not in the mood just for better chance at certain chips for a build idea. On top of that’s, i think it’s insane that it just only ends at 30 with 2 mid bosses. like for the first runs on each palette i understand, it’s configuring it and all that. But afterwards, the fact that you can’t make it any more difficult for challenge’s sake/have an endless/extended mode to allow for a glimpse/fraction of the power you had on the first palettes clear is crazy to me. Like why would you give us that taste of power and just dash any hope of reaching it permanently. a lot of things in the handling just kinda make no sense to me, really feels like they’re working against the player experience for no reason other than to make it less customizable or extreme for no reason considering it is only contained to the single player pve mode. Aside from that gripe, glad there’s a mode i can just sink my time and play single player splatoon in that isn’t alterna since it becomes increasingly obvious every now and then as a solo player that true hell is a team that has no idea what that doing in a team game.

Following that note i’m pretty happy there’s now a mode i can just play without having to bank on my teammates, as mentioned before. Because lately i’ve just been having awful queues and matchmaking. Like i should not be losing every other waver in SR and its crushing getting back to back losses with overall, and popular target. Like yeah i was on my game but like that does not mean shit when goobertron max (bless their soul) is going 2 and 9 on short range shooter with sub 700 paint. Like i’m all aware how diverse the player base is skill wise, especially when playing during the peak of the season before anyone has catalog 100, but like i can’t keep getting washed by catalog cadets at level 35+. Like not only does it feel bad but getting those gold medals on loss chains really kicks me in the teeth. No shade to my team they’re just there after all, but the medals really are just a “tough shit rockstar, carry harder” and man. Like, true but sometimes i wanna just be able to play without having to consider for my team. I haven’t been able to get a good stamper game in like a week because every time we just get out-comped so hard 😭 due to the way they keep nerfing the damn stamper (WHY!) and it becomes more and more reliant on a team that can accommodate its weaknesses(increasingly bad ink efficiency, paint coverage, attack size, and) exchange for its strength (oppressive range, damage, and sub combo with semi consistent mid/backline pressure in the special) I’m hoping maybe the final (cause this is PROBABLY the final season and final patch with all that 2 years of content stuff they yapped about) season not only blesses me with the ONE and only possible stamper buff or another viable 3rd stamper option/splatana type (albeit it only looks like we’re getting second kits at most) since stamper noveau (they finally decided to admit that it was noveau and that neo WAS a fuck up and NOT intentional (idk why the hell they tried to double down on that shit) as cool as it is, ain’t doing shit with that mist. Like it’s genuinely insulting. You give stamper what could be one of, if not, it’s best sub in burst bomb, and then you give it mist in kit 2 like that isn’t some bullshit. Crab is cool and can be super good for your team with anchoring and range but the fact that you have to lose burst bomb (or just in general, the abillity to poke with/bomb combo which is a splatana staple (especially on wiper with torpedo)) is nowhere near worth it since you dont gain similar or even comparable reward from the mist, it burns more ink to use, and it doesn’t even provide utility for your team the same way (burst bomb can damage combo very well with your team and also paint the floor around them helping their escape) So hopefully in the season of what is 100% gonna be the deep cut season, where they introduce the last of shiver and frye’s weapon types (every weapon has a new option except stringer and splatana, wouldn’t be shocked if they just didn’t give one but since it’s happened every season this WOULD be the perfect and only time if any to make my wish come true and maybe make stringer even cooler. pretty please splat devs), have the deep cut splatfest, and shiver inevitiabky wins in landslide victory; that they end it on something good instead of permanently shelving the splatana legacy under the shadow that used to be patch zero stamper

(Just now realizing maybe i am doing too much side order, every palette at least once (clears doesn’t count present clears) that many jellotons is ridiculous, also turns out there’s phone wallpaper i didnt pick up for this so neat. i never use them though)

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crackedpumpkin · 9 months

Note

“Chicken and croffles” I had flashbacks at that man. There’s this person I watch and they were telling their story of trying to rizz someone through food, and by rizz I mean they tried to impress an attractive waiter, but fumbled a bit and ordered chicken and waffles. He got so nervous they ordered the first thing he saw, which was chicken and waffles. How attractive was this waiter? So attractive that his friends literally had to warn them and also tried to clean him up a bit to look more presentable LMAO

Really liked this chapter!!! Love the sceneries and how Miles and “Ray Paynt” interacted!!!! Something about how you write feels real, like even in the little things with Miles’ “It’s a choice.” And when dragging him along to the cafe at an unexpected notice. Stop writing food so deliciously it’s nearly 8am for me and I’m wanting some nice fruit-ade or something!!! 😭/pos

From one Michael to another, MICHAEL STAHP WITH THE TOUCHING YOU’RE GONNA GET YOUR WILLYIAM CHOPPED OFF FR

omfg i felt that fr im not even kidding. what i would give to be on the receiving end of that starstruckness.... okay in all honesty I'd probably be that very dude dropping my utensils.

WAIT OKAY STORY TIME BECAUSE IVE GOT ONE OF MY OWN:

So i recently went to korea in june and i went with 2 other friends who went to queue up at the NIKE store in the morning for their customization stuff right? So I wake up later and i go grab a coffee first at this store my friend recommended because it's cheap + rly good.

As such, I casually stroll along the street with my earbuds in bc im cool and swag and feeling myself right? I finally find this coffee shop and step up to the counter to order, except what do i see?

A GORGEOUS, STUNNING GIRL MANNING THE CASHIER.

At this point i am in full blown panic. I have never met anyone so pretty in my life. Her hair was silky smooth and dyed a light platinum-ish shade, and her makeup was flawless. her skin? dewy like a morning glory in bloom. Her entire figure and being? goddesslike.

at this point i am sweating buckets just from the thought of talking to her. but it's fine, right? its just a cup of coffee. i can do this.

i then proceed to ABSOLUTELY FUMBLE MY WORDS.

I just wanted this pretty drink called a franobe guys. thats all i wanted. but i got so shy and she couldnt hear me saying franobe so she kept going 'ah, latte?' and guys. i almost died on the spot.

I repeated it like 2x before she got what i was trying to say. Quick PSA that i am not fluent in korean at all, and understand more than i can speak. she asks me something in korean and i just go 'ne?' with wideass eyes like id just seen my newborn child or some shit.

anyway i finally manage to pay and get my drink and i walk away with my head practically in my hands. up till this day i am paranoid she thinks im an idiot. this is my chicken and croffles story for all you guys out there.

also im straight but this is one of the rare exceptions i lost my composure fr. what can i say? im w e ak.

im really glad you liked this chapter !! if it's one trait i could've given my characters or reader oc its the endless funds to go cafe hopping. cafe hopping is so, so fun, but so, so expensive like goddamn let me live my main character life in peace fr....

it's euphoric to hear that you liked the little moments !! i enjoyed thinking through those and just going like ah yes, he would say this! i really love writing or thinking about the small moments that lead up to the big picture. (also @buthowboutno-spamming gave me such great advice regarding this, and i wouldnt have been able to flesh out my fic and vision if not for his advice)

michael deserves to get his dick chopped off fr. but it's okay!! I plan for all my characters to go through developmental arcs lmfao, ive gotten too attached to the two idiots to let go of their potential now :)

Go get some fruit-ade or make some yourself bro it's super easy super good. lmk if you want a recipe and im more than happy to provide~

#CPRambles

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crystalninjaphoenix · 11 months

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Secret Lairs

A JSE Fanfic

SepticHeroes AU: Part 17

Previous Part

Totally didn’t forget to queue this last night and am now just posting this now, haha. (If you were here for me posting it live you saw Nothing!) Anyway. In this chapter Jackie has a meeting with Lorelai, a fellow Hero, and also one with Spitfire Cat, regarding the new SAM the League sent him. And yeah. Keeping it short this time. Enjoy :)

===============

“You get a lot of packages.”

“Huh?” Jackie blinked in confusion. “Well hello to you too. Good to have a nice greeting when I get home from work.”

Chase looked over at him from where he was sitting on the sofa playing video games. “Hello,” he said with a grin. “But seriously. Feels like you get a lot of stuff.”

“I guess.” Jackie looked down at the box in his hands. The mail worker on the ground floor of their apartment building had flagged him down the moment they saw him, telling him something had arrived that morning. He had a suspicion what it was.

“Do you order, like, clothes or stuff online?” Chase asked.

“Uh yeah. Various stuff.” Jackie nodded. “Hang on, I’m gonna see if this is what I think it is. If it is, I’ll be right back.”

“Cool.”

Jackie took the package to his room and began opening the cardboard box, slicing through the tape with a pair of scissors. He opened the flaps and found... a different box. White and green, made of sturdy plastic. Bold lettering across the front proudly read The Semi-Autonomous Machine - by SepTech. A clear window also revealed the product inside.

“Yes!” Jackie pumped his fist in the air. He’d thought this would be it! The League had said they’d be shipping a SAM out to all the Heroes in the county, after all. Even though those deliveries had been delayed, Jackie kept his eye on the calendar, knowing it would be soon. And when he’d picked up the package downstairs and felt how heavy it was, his first thought was a SAM.

The model inside the box was the size of a volleyball, its metal a dull gray. But not to worry! The back of the box listed several features, including customizable color. How was it possible to change the color of metal? Technology was amazing. Jackie was about to open up the box and take the SAM out when he remembered.

“When you get your Machine from the League, I need you to bring it to me. Before you turn it on, or even take it out of the box. I don’t want to keep it. I just want a friend of mine to look it over.”

Spitfire Cat had said that a while ago. And he’d reminded Jackie about it in an email.

Jackie hesitated, staring at the SAM through the clear plastic window. He’d initially denied Spitfire’s request. But... something had changed since then. Jackie no longer distrusted Spitfire. Well, he still didn’t trust him, either. He’d be an idiot to fully trust any villain.

Except that he’d trusted Schneep, even after finding out he was the Specter. That whole revelation had thrown his worldview into disarray. It was hard to maintain a solid line between do-gooders and evil-doers when you found out your friend and doctor was also a practiced thief. So, the question was now, did he blur that line even more for Spitfire Cat?

He thought about it. And then he sighed, and walked over to his laptop. As soon as it booted up he went into the burner email and sent a message to Spitfire. I have the SAM from the League. The Semi-Autonomous Machine. You wanted a friend to look at it right? Well now’s your chance. But only if I can be there to watch whatever’s going to happen.

“Jackie?” Chase called from the living room. “You okay in there?”

Right. He’d said he would be right back.

Jackie picked up the SAM box. No reason to keep this a secret. They were commercial products, not just some tool for the League. He carried it back into the living room. Chase had his game paused, staring at him. “Look what I got!” Jackie said, grinning.

“...no way.” Chase gasped. “Bro! How’d you get one of those?! They cost a fortune!”

“Well, it was a gift.”

“Who do you know who can just give something like that away? And can you introduce me to them?”

Jackie laughed. “Just someone from work. A work friend. I got lucky, really. They were doing a giveaway thing.”

“Bro.” Chase was completely stunned. “We have our own robot. It can do anything for us!” Sitting on the sofa next to him, Frosty lifted his head. He stared at the box Jackie was carrying and growled. Chase laughed. “Oh, sounds like someone’s jealous. C’mon, boy, you know some robot can’t replace you.” He scratched Frosty’s ears and he seemed to calm down. “But seriously, Jackie. That’s insane. Open it up!”

“Oh. Uh... not yet,” Jackie said. “I hear there’s a whole startup thing and I don’t really want to do that right now. I’m tired. Worked all day.” Not technically a lie. There was a traffic accident while he was out on patrol, and he’d stepped in to stop the car from going out of control and make sure everyone was alright. Nobody died, thank god. But there were injuries. After all that... he didn’t really want to think too hard.

Chase stared at him. Then slowly nodded. “Yeah. Uh, sure. It’s your Machine.”

“I actually prefer calling them SAMs. It’s an acronym for the name.”

“SAM!” Chase grinned. “Aw, that’s adorable! It’s like it’s your kid and you named them.”

“I was thinking more of a pet, but yeah.”

Frosty growled again, but was satiated with more scratches. “Have any plans for the night, bro?” Chase asked. “Wanna play something?”

“Maybe. I have to wait for a work email, but if that gets taken care of, sure. We can play Smash or something.”

“Nah, you have to mentally prepare to Smash. We can do Mario Kart or something.”

Jackie made a face. “You know what you were doing with that phrasing.”

Chase flashed another grin. “Perhaps. We’re both adults here.”

“Yeah yeah. Ask me again after dinner. I’ll be in my room until then.” Jackie turned around and headed back to his bedroom, where he shut the door behind him.

He didn’t have to wait long for Spitfire’s reply. We need to meet up. This Saturday, head to 8915 Waterlow Street. There’s a pub at that address called Hannah’s Bar. Wear something to cover your face, but not your supersuit. ANYTHING BUT YOUR SUPERSUIT. And you should probably hide the Machine in a bag or something. Go inside and ask the owner for a ruby eye cocktail. When they tell you they don’t serve that, say, “I’ll pay extra if you look in the kegs.” They’ll take you into the back. Follow them, and don’t ask questions. Me and my friend will meet you there.

Well. That was sketchy as all fuck. And also inconvenient. I have plans on Saturday, Jackie replied. Does some other time work? Saturday was the day Lorelai—the Hero known as Pink Sunset—wanted to show him some surprise League welcome. And he was not going to miss that.

Spitfire responded within ten minutes. Sunday, then. Evening would be best, 4:30 or later. But show up no later than 7:30. We need to finish by eight. See you then.

Jackie had a bad feeling about this. But he supposed this was what he got for working with a villain.

===============

Saturday came quickly. Even though he was supposed to meet Lorelai at two o’clock, he left the apartment around ten. Lorelai had said it would take a couple hours to drive to this secret meeting place, so Jackie figured he could fly there in double the time. He said goodbye to Chase, telling him that he was going to meet up with some work friends and he’d be home late, then headed out.

Lorelai had messaged him the coordinates soon after their talk, and Jackie plugged those into the Red Line’s GPS function to tell him which way to fly. Northeast. Interesting. While there were some smaller suburbs and isolated business facilities around Daindover, the northeast was mostly wilderness. Just fields and forests for a while. Not even many roads, only a single motorway that cut through said fields and forests. His intrigue and curiosity made the flight over less boring.

He reached the coordinates at almost exactly two o’clock. Looking down, he saw a small dirt road, leading to a small dirt parking lot in the middle of a forest. A campsite? There were a few cars sitting in the lot, and when he flew closer to the ground, he saw... a woman in a familiar pink and orange supersuit. Lorelai. She saw him at around the same time, and started waving her arms. Light flashed in the air, harmless pink fireworks going off around Lorelai.

Jackie landed in the middle of the lot, and took a moment to catch his breath. Lorelai hurried over. “Hey!” she said, smiling. “You found it! Glad I didn’t mess up the coordinates, ha. Well? What do you think?”

“Uh...” Jackie looked around, still recovering from the extended flight. He was pretty physically durable, but four hours of concentration could wear anyone down. Not to mention the cold wind. “It’s... a forest.”

Lorelai chuckled. “Well, yeah. We had to be discreet. C’mere. This way.” She walked over to the nearest tree, and Jackie followed her, curious. “You’re gonna love this, watch.” Lorelai grinned at him, then reached up and grabbed a small branch. She pulled. A mechanical CHA-CLUNK! echoed from inside the tree, and then a section of it slid upwards, revealing a metallic inside.

“Whoa!” Jackie gasped. “Secret entrance.”

“Yep. There’s a few around here, inside that tree, and that one, and those two...” Lorelai pointed out the trees as she spoke. Now that Jackie was paying attention, he noticed how all these trees looked basically the same. The same size, and with the same small branch jutting out from the side. “They’re only big enough for one person, as you can see, so be warned if you’re bringing a big group here. Everyone should come at different times.” She stepped back from the tree. “Here, you use this one. Just press the white button and it’ll go.”

“Alright.” Jackie stepped inside. She wasn’t kidding about them being only big enough for one person. He couldn’t fully extend his arms. “So it’s a lift?”

“Yeah. I’ll take another and meet you down there.” Lorelai gave him a thumbs up. “See you down there!”

“Uh, see you.” Jackie looked around, and quickly noticed the panel with three different colored buttons: red, white, and yellow. He pressed the white one, and the tree-door slid closed. Then he felt the floor move. It was just like any other elevator he’d been in, just much smaller. He was glad he wasn’t claustrophobic.

A few seconds later, the door slid open again, and he stepped out into a large room shaped like a half-circle. The walls were painted a cool blue on the top half and white on the bottom, and the carpet had a design of different-sized blue and yellow polka dots on a black background. White bar lights overhead lit up the area in an even glow. The elevator was on the curved wall, and he saw four other small metallic doors that no doubt connected to the other trees above ground. On the curved wall were two bathroom doors and a wide-open archway, through which drifted some faint, upbeat music.

Ding! Jackie turned around and watched one of those small doors slide upwards. Lorelai stepped out. “Pretty efficient, huh? You’d never know we were twenty meters below ground.”

“Twenty meters?” Jackie looked up at the ceiling, imagining the earth pressing on it.

“Give or take.”

“Huh. You’re right, I never would’ve guessed that. The elevator was pretty fast.” He looked back down. “Hey, what’re the other buttons in there for?”

“The yellow one stops and starts the lift, while the red one calls for help in case you get stuck in there,” Lorelai explained. “I don’t know why they have the yellow one, to be honest. Probably for maintenance. Anyway!” She grinned. “C’mon, this is the place.” She started walking towards the archway, gesturing for Jackie to follow, which he did. “Welcome to the League Lair.”

Jackie stopped in the archway and stared. This was a huge, open area, easily the size of a basketball court. Maybe two. It looked like someone had mashed together two restaurants with a lounge and a public gym.

On the left wall was a long counter with a buffet of food, and on the right was another counter that blocked off a kitchen from the rest of the area. Round tables and chairs were dotted around, clustered close by both these areas. In the back, partly cordoned off by a half-wall, were professional-grade workout machines, sleek and streamlined, and the very back wall had been converted into a fake mountainside for rock-climbing. In the middle of this all were sofas and armchairs, sitting on top of plush-looking rugs and accompanied by coffee tables and a few TV stands—with TVs and all their accessories. The ceiling was high overhead, with mounted lights giving off a bright glow. The walls were painted black, but hanging on them were several large, colorful framed pictures. The furniture was sleekly designed, all smooth white and grays with highlights of other colors.

“What the...” Jackie trailed off, stunned.

“Pretty cool, huh?!” Lorelai patted him on the back. “You’d never guess this was down here!”

“N-no, I—I didn’t even think about—” Jackie laughed. “So, is this place for Heroes to hang out?”

“Anyone who works for the League can get in. Did you bring your badge?”

“Oh, uh, no.”

“Bring it next time. There’s a scan that happens once you get in the elevator, it won’t go down if you don’t have one. Usually.” Lorelai leaned close. “I thought you might forget it, so I asked the maintenance guys to turn off the scan for, like, half an hour around two.”

Jackie laughed again. “Well, uh, thanks.” He kept staring at this giant room, this League Lair. There were people in here. Almost everyone was dressed casually, business casual at most. The one exception was a familiar face sitting on one of the sofas. “Is that Terra-Man?”

“Oh yeah, it is!” Lorelai said excitedly. “Hey, Josh!” She waved and started walking on over. Jackie hurried to follow.

Terra-Man—(his name was Josh?)—looked up at the shout and grinned. He wasn’t wearing his mask. “Ah, Lorelai! Oh, and young Windstorm, too. How’ve ye been?”

“I’m not that young!” Jackie protested.

Terra-Man—Josh laughed. “I know, I know, jus’ messin’ with you.” He grabbed the TV remote from the sofa next to him and paused whatever he was watching. “Well? What d’you t’ink? Nice place, huh? Nicer t’an the one we have back home, I’ll tell you t’at.”

“Y-yeah. I’m... in shock.” Jackie looked around again. “Are those... comic book pages?” Yeah, those framed pictures were definitely comic book pages.

“Yep. You know how the League produces comics about the Heroes,” Lorelai said, taking off her mask as well. “The ones here are prints retelling the adventures of Heroes in this county. Greatly exaggerated, of course. And the Council members, too. My favorite is this one of Red Huntress and the Shadow over on the back.”

Jackie nodded. “Are there any of you here?”

Lorelai shrugged. “One. Over in the corner. But I think it looks great. You’ve only been a Hero for a little while, so I think they’ll start making comics for you about a year in? Unless you do something really amazing before that. If the art is good, it’ll be put up in here! We don’t have much say in that, to be honest, it’s mostly Marketing’s decision.”

“...wow.” Jackie was completely overwhelmed. He knew that Heroes had comics made about them—hell, it was how he’d heard about a lot of them—but it was really starting to sink in that he could have a comic about him. Kids could read about him the same way he read about others.

“Like I said, much nicer t’an the Lair back home for me,” Josh added. “We don’ have comics on the wall, or a rock-climbin’ section. Jesus, t’at’s insane.”

“When are you going home, anyway?” Lorelai asked.

Josh shrugged. “Whenever t’ey need me to. You know me. I love t’is place. Some o’the best Heroes t’is side of the globe are from t’is county, and I choose t’believe it’s because of all the great perks you have.”

“So you’re just gonna mooch for a while?”

“Ah, you know me so well.”

The two of them chuckled, and Jackie laughed a little too, trying to match the energy. It seemed to work. At least, the two of them didn’t look at him weird or anything. “Oh, I-I should introduce myself to you. I’m Jackie.” He pushed his mask onto his forehead. “And your name is Josh?”

“Got t’at right.” Josh gave a little salute. “Likin’ bein’ a Hero so far?”

“It’s not that different from what I was doing before, honestly. This, though...” Jackie gestured vaguely at everything around them. “...this is all new. How many of these are there?”

“Well, there’s one per county in the UK and Ireland,” Lorelai said. “I can’t tell you much about other countries. America has a lot, but I don’t know the specifics. One per state, maybe?”

“Uhhh some of their states are bigger than most countries, I doubt it’s that.”

“Point is, there’s at least one in any country where the League has jurisdiction,” Lorelai continued. “Gotta give the Heroes some place to have their free time. I'm here a lot. Love the rock-climbing, it’s better than any gym in my city and well worth the drive. Josh is gonna hang out here a lot, seemingly—” Josh raised his hand in acknowledgement “—but it’s mostly local Heroes. Moonstone came in here at least once, but you know her. Busy with national team stuff. It was crazy, though. We had an obstacle course set up that day and got the top time. Then she made it float and got the top time while it was floating!”

“Holy shit, while it was floating?!” Jackie gasped.

“While it was floating! I know, right?!” Lorelai grinned, bouncing on her feet. “God, you know, I’m so jealous of your city. The last two superheroes from there—before you, I mean—could control gravity and time, do you know how rare those are?”

“Oh yeah.” Jackie felt a swell of pride. “They’re super cool.”

Lorelai giggled. “You’re super cool yourself, you know? I’ve never seen anyone zoom through a probation period so fast.”

“Aw, thanks.” And now Jackie was blushing, flattered. Was he really that good?

“Anything you want to do while you’re here?” Lorelai asked.

“Whatever you do, can ye do it somewhere t’at doesn’ block the TV?” Josh asked.

“Oh come on, it can’t be good watching in this wide open room. The sound’s got to echo.”

“The echo adds character.”

Just then, Jackie’s stomach growled. “You know what? I think we’ll start with lunch,” he said. “What do they serve here?”

Lorelai and Josh laughed. “Just about anything, really,” Lorelai said. “And everything has different options for different food restrictions, too. Come on, menu’s this way.”

Jackie followed her.

He spent a good three hours checking out the various features of the League Lair, including the workout machines and some of the video games they had. Lorelai and Josh were fun to hang out with. He could almost forget they were Heroes that he’d admired from afar for so long.

He left around five, and probably should have left sooner. It got dark quickly on the flight home, and that meant it got cold. He was so glad his new suit had insulation, but even with that, his face was freezing by the time he returned to his apartment. He said hi to Chase briefly, then went into his room and fell asleep almost immediately.

This had been a good, busy day. But tomorrow would be just as busy... and maybe not quite as good. It depended on what Spitfire Cat had planned.

===============

“You’re going out again?”

Jackie paused as he walked past Chase’s open bedroom door. He glanced inside and saw Chase sitting in his swivel chair, facing the doorway. “Uh, yeah.” Jackie smiled. “Don’t worry, I’ll be back in time to do that editing on your video I promised.”

“Right.” Chase nodded. “So, are you going to work, or are you hanging out with someone?”

Anxiety jolted through Jackie’s heart. “Are you implying something?”

“I dunno. Your schedule has just been pretty inconsistent since you got your new job. It doesn’t help my memory problems.” Chase shrugged. “But you can do whatever you want, y’know.”

Jackie let out a breath. “It’s just for work. Shouldn’t take too long, I hope. I’ll be back by eight at the latest.”

Chase laughed. “Alright. Hope you do whatever you need to. Don’t feel too pressured to help me edit. I mean, the commenters do love it when you make witty comments in text, but no pressure.”

“That sounds like pressure to me.”

“Only if you want it to be.” Chase swiveled back around to face the desk. “Oh yeah, you might want to come back through the side entrance. There’s gonna be repairs on the lights in the lobby starting in, like, thirty minutes. Might be easier to avoid it.”

“Got it.” Jackie gave him a thumbs-up. “See you later.”

“See you.”

Jackie continued heading out. Well, it sounded like he’d better come in through the window when he returned. That’d be easier than taking the side entrance.

There was a knot in his stomach from that whole conversation. The more he talked to Chase, the more uneasy he felt. He had to tell him. He had to tell him.

But he didn’t.

===============

Jackie followed Spitfire’s emailed instructions and headed to 8915 Waterlow Street. This whole thing was making him nervous, so he didn’t risk flying, instead taking the train and walking the rest of the day. His nerves were not helped by the fact that Waterlow Street was well-known for being... shady. It was full of run-down businesses that seemed to think throwing on some paint over brick walls made them look presentable. No need to clean their windows or fix their broken signs or cover up the spray-painted villain signs on the sidewalk.

Honestly, the whole north side of town was known for less-than-savory activity. There was a reason it was called the Villain’s Haven. Jackie felt bad for the people who lived in the area. They had to be scared. He wondered why no one seemed to move away.

Hannah’s Bar sat at the address where Spitfire said it would, identified by a hanging sign. The stone building looked like it had sat here for at least a couple centuries. Jackie made sure the blue bandanna covering his face was secure, then pushed open the door.

It was fairly dark inside, courtesy of dim bulbs and small windows. Completely empty, too. Except for a dark-haired woman standing behind the bar checking her phone. She looked up when he entered, and gestured vaguely to the menu written in chalk behind her.

Jackie took a deep breath, and walked up to her. “Hi. I’d like to order a ruby eye cocktail.”

The woman raised an eyebrow. She gave him a long look, assessing his hidden face and baggy hoodie. “That’s not on the menu,” she said.

“I’ll pay extra if you look in the back,” Jackie said.

She looked him over again. Then she stood up straight and lifted up part of the bar. “Almost right,” she grunted. “But I’ll let it slide because you clearly haven’t been here before. Come on.” Before Jackie could say anything else, she turned around and walked through a side door.

He hurried after her, following her into a small room with racks of bottles, including one of those checkerboard wine racks that took up a whole wall. The woman began moving bottles around, taking them out of spots in the checkerboard rack and putting them in new ones. Soon, something clicked. She pushed on a portion of the wine rack and it retracted, sliding behind the rest of it. A hidden doorway, revealing a staircase. “Go on,” she said, gesturing for him to go.

“...yeah.” He nodded, then descended the staircase.

Jackie expected to walk into an even darker basement. But, strangely, the staircase got brighter as he went down. Soon, he walked into a wide-open area that looked like... an American diner. Tables dotted the black-and-white tiled floor and booths lined the walls. A counter with bar stools ran along the back, another menu behind it blocking off the kitchen from view. Lamps dangled from the ceiling. There seemed to be a red and silver color scheme for them, as well as the rest of the furniture. Faint rock music filled the air, coming from an unknown source.

But strangely enough, the walls were decorated—not unlike the walls of the League Lair—with pictures of supers. These weren’t framed comic pages, but instead wall-size painting drawn to look like comic panels. And instead of depicting the Council of Heroes, these all depicted villains. Jackie recognized many of the costumes. But... these villains looked... heroic in these drawings. Their smiles were dashing, not menacing. As much as that threw him off, it made sense when he thought about it.

There were people sitting at the tables and booths, and they all paused in what they were doing when he entered the room. Every single one had their face covered in some way. Jackie shifted uncomfortably at all the eyes on him.

Then he saw motion. A wave. His eyes locked onto it. Spitfire was sitting in one of the booths, wearing his full costume. There was someone else in the booth with him, but they were partially hidden by some of the other customers. Jackie didn’t say anything, just hurried over. As he walked, the others watching him turned away, going back to whatever they were doing before.

“Glad to see you found the place,” Spitfire said as Jackie slid into the booth, sitting opposite him.

“What is this place?” Jackie whispered.

“It’s a... hangout,” Spitfire said carefully. “For certain types of people.”

Jackie glanced around. “Nicer than I expected for a certain type of hangout.”

“Some people have standards.” Spitfire gestured at the person sitting next to him. “I should introduce you. This is—”

“I am the Disassembler!” they interrupted. “No, wait, that sounds stupid outloud. Uh, I am the—not the Destroyer, uh—I am the Dismantler!”

Jackie blinked in confusion. The other person in the booth... was a teenage girl. Or, about that age. Even though she wore a black face mask, he could still tell. Maybe she was slightly older? Her brown hair was pulled back in a ponytail, and she wore a black jacket that had circuit board designs applied in silver fabric paint. “I... O... kay?” he said slowly.

Spitfire sighed. “This is the Dismantler,” he said. “Dismantler, this is the contact I told you about.”

“Hi.” the girl—Dismantler waved.

“I’m... sorry, I’m a bit...” Jackie paused. “Uh, how old are you?”

“I am an adult,” she said insistently.

“Right.” Jackie looked at Spitfire.

“Don’t stare at me that way,” Spitfire snapped. “Her dad’s one of my best contacts. That’s how we know each other.”

“He sells weapons,” Dismantler said helpfully.

“Gw—Dismantler, don’t just offer that up!” Spitfire gasped.

“I know who you are, by the way,” Dismantler continued, looking at Jackie. “Spitfire told me. And I don’t mind. Mom and Dad hate you cause you arrested my Uncle Soren, but I get it. You were just doing your job. So no hard feelings. I’m not gonna mess with your stuff or anything.”

“Soren?” Jackie repeated, picking up on the only specific detail from that. “Do you mean Soren Moizone? Also known as Pathos?”

“Oh. Yeah, I guess you’d know his name,” Dismantler said.

Spitfire’s head dropped into his hands. “I thought you said you wouldn’t say anything,” he groaned.

“Sorry.” Dismantler looked embarrassed behind her mask. “I got carried away. I just wanted him to know I don’t have a grudge or anything.”

“He wouldn’t have thought you’d had a grudge if you didn’t tell him your entire family history. That’s not—that’s really not safe, you know. He could easily figure out who you are now.”

“I don’t think he’d do anything to a teenager, though.”

“You said you were an adult,” Jackie said faintly.

“I’m eighteen. Still technically a teenager.”

Silence fell over the table. Dismantler looked back and forth between the two men. Spitfire was still doing the facepalm of the century, while Jackie was bewildered and a bit lost. “Uh... so I have this,” Jackie said, taking off his backpack. He tilted it so Spitfire and Dismantler could see the SAM in its box inside. “What’re you gonna do with it?”

Spitfire finally lifted his head. “We’re going to inspect it.”

“Inspect it?”

“Yep!” Dismantler nodded. “That’s what I do.” She leaned forward, reaching out. “Gimme. Please.”

“Y-yeah. Sure.” Jackie pulled the box out of the backpack—or more accurately, shoved the backpack away from the box, since it was big and kind of awkward—and set it on the table in front of him.

Dismantler grabbed it and spun it around to the clear plastic window. “Oooo! I can feel it even through the box,” she whispered excitedly. “Are those nanoparticles coating the surface? I bet they change the color.” She began opening the box, but it proved more difficult than expected.

“Here, I can help,” Spitfire offered.

“Laser open this flap and I can get it from there,” Dismantler said.

“It’s not a—yeah.” Spitfire pointed at one of the box edges. A thin, hair-wide beam of red energy severed part of it with the smell of burning plastic.

“Thanks.” Dismantler tore the box open the rest of the way and pulled the SAM from the protective packaging. “Oh yeah! Nanoparticles for color change! That’s so cool.” She set the SAM down on the table. Her eyes, previously a pale gray-green, started to glow white.

Any questions Jackie had were immediately silenced by what followed. The SAM started to pull apart. The metal plate of the coating floated away, and the camera extended until all its parts were separated. Countless wires unwound themselves, and the single tail-like appendage peeled open like a banana. Everything stayed where it was, floating, even as the Machine was slowly dismantled.

Oh. Dismantled. So this was her super power.

Once the SAM was fully disassembled, parts suspended in the air, Dismantler reached into the floating mess and grabbed some tiny, fingerprint-sized metal bits. “Got it,” she said cheerfully. In a matter of seconds, the parts of the SAM had once again converged into a solid device, lying unremarkably on the table.

Jackie was speechless. “I... I’ve never heard of... such... precise... telepathy.”

“Oh, I’m not a telepath, I’m a technopath,” Dismantler explained. “I can control technology with my mind. I’m not surprised that you’ve never heard of it, though. It was only recognized officially about ten years ago. But I’m pretty sure we’ve been around for longer. And I think I’m one because my dad works with a lot of advanced technology. I said he was a weapons dealer earlier, really it’s more of general smuggling.”

“Technopathy,” Jackie repeated in awe. Then he shook his head and got back on track. “What did you take out of my SAM?”

“SAM? Oh, that’s so much cooler than Machine! It makes it sound like a robot on a scifi spaceship.” Dismantler laughed. “But anyway.” She opened her hand and showed Jackie the small metal bits. “These are what we in the business call ‘bugs.’ You know, like trackers and listening devices and stuff like that. These ones also have wireless NICs, which are really hard to make, but basically they let the devices transmit signals to a source.”

“Someone bugged my SAM?” Jackie asked. “But... I-I hadn’t even opened it...” He looked over at Spitfire.

Spitfire just nodded. “I thought they’d do something like this. That’s why I asked you to let Dismantler look at it.”

“Why would the League bug the SAM they sent to me?” Jackie asked.

“Don’t take it personally. They probably did it to all the Machines they sent to Heroes.” Spitfire shrugged. “It might be alright if you left it in there. Depends on what you used the SAM for. But personally, I thought you should know. It gets creepy when you don’t know about things that listen to you. I bet they didn’t even give you the terms and conditions to sign.”

“They didn't,” Jackie admitted, speaking slowly. “But still... why?”

“League likes control,” Spitfire said simply.

Jackie leaned back in his seat. He felt a bit dizzy all of a sudden. “Well... a-at least that’s taken care of.”

“Not entirely.” Dismantler curled her hand back into a fist and retracted it. “There could be spyware programs on it. I don’t know. My super power only works on, like, physical hardware. I can’t help with any software. Like programs or viruses.”

“Oh.” Jackie stared at the SAM, suddenly uneasy.

“Don’t worry about it too much, though,” Dismantler said. “Just don’t let the SAM go anywhere you wouldn’t be expected to be. Or do stuff you don’t want it to see in front of the camera. Or talk about stuff you don’t want it to hear without putting a muffling device over it. Those are really easy to make.”

“Alright... if you say it’s fine, I’ll... yeah.” Jackie nodded slowly. “I guess... it would be weirder if I suddenly got rid of it. Um... I’m going to go home now.”

“Aw, don’t want to hang out?” Dismantler sounded a bit disappointed.

“Sorry. I have a roommate, and I-I don’t want him to worry too much.” Jackie stood up. He picked up the SAM, placed it back in the box, then awkwardly shoved the box into his backpack.

“I’ll email you if there’s anything else,” Spitfire said. “You said we were dropping the search for the Specter, but there’s still the Puppeteer. That was our original goal, anyway. If I find anything... you know.”

“Got it.” Jackie nodded. “I’ll see you around then.”

“See you around.” Spitfire nodded back, then turned to Dismantler. “Hey G—Dismantler, can I see those bugs?”

“Sure.”

As Jackie walked back over to the staircase, he glanced over his shoulder back at the table. Even from here, he could see the bright yellow glow of a solid-heat sphere. Spitfire was going to get rid of those bugs the only way he knew how.

===============

“Hey Chase? Do you still want me to edit your video?”

“Holy hell!” Chase jumped at the sudden voice. He’d been walking down the hallway towards his room when he heard it. Frosty nudged him, making sure he wouldn’t fall, and Chase hurried over to Jackie’s room. The door was open, and Jackie was inside, sitting on his bed with his laptop. “When did you get home?!”

Jackie blinked in confusion. “I don’t know, six-ish? I’ve been home for a couple hours. Where have you been?”

“I took Frosty for a walk,” Chase said. “And then I thought I’d get dinner while I was out. Just walked down to Wendy’s and ate there. Uh... anyway, yeah. Editing would be cool. Just give me a second to pull everything up.”

“Cool.”

Chase hurried over to his room, gently closing the door as soon as Frosty passed through it. He pulled out his phone and texted a number: Rebecca, one of the mail room attendants for the apartment buildings. He was familiar with her, enough that he’d asked her for a favor. Hey did u see Jackie come in thru the front lobby around 6:00?

A moment passed. Then she replied. No definitely not. And I didnt hear any complaints from the guys working on the lights. Theyve complained every time someone walked past.

Jackie hadn’t come in through the front lobby.

But he also hadn’t come in through the side entrance. Chase knew that because he had watched that entrance for hours since Jackie had left. It wasn’t too hard. He just sat on a bench and kept glancing up at the door every few minutes or so. He’d brought his phone and a portable charger, bouncing between checking social media and reading some new e-books he’d downloaded. So he could have been distracted, maybe? And missed Jackie going in? But he doubted that. People rarely approached the side entrance, so the people who did got his attention right away. All residents. None of them Jackie.

How the fuck did he get into the building? There were only two entrances! Had he lied about the time he came back? Where had he gone, anyway? And why had his backpack been full of stuff?

Chase closed his text messages and opened up his notes app. He used the notes a lot to make up for his terrible memory, and recently, he’d been noting Jackie’s weird inconsistencies. He was out a lot. Usually said it was for work or a work-related thing. Which, sure, Jackie had said he was working with law enforcement, he was probably on-call as cases happened. But Jackie seemed to be always on call, no matter what time of day it was. Even for a job like this, he had to have specific hours, right?

Not to mention Jackie had been acting... strange lately. He seemed nervous. And Chase felt like he was avoiding him. Was he hiding something? He’d tried asking Schneep if he’d seen Jackie lately or noticed anything weird with him, but Schneep said it had been a while since the two of them had seen each other, and that if something was going on, Chase should ask Jackie about it in person. JJ said something similar when Chase texted him.

Had Jackie gotten involved in something... dangerous? Something that would earn him a lot of money? Because frankly, Chase didn’t believe Jackie got a Semi-Autonomous Machine from a work giveaway. Those things went for thousands. No job would just give that away. And Jackie couldn’t have that much money to spare. Otherwise he wouldn’t be rooming with Chase in a mid-tier apartment.

He knew he had to confront Jackie about it soon. But when? Tomorrow seemed too soon, and next week seemed too late. Especially if Jackie really was in danger.

Maybe a couple days from now. Yes, that seemed good. It gave him enough time to be sure about stuff. Chase made a note of that, then went over to his computer and started opening up the editing software. If Jackie offered to help, Chase would let him help. And maybe he’d try to get Jackie to open up while he did so. But he doubted that would work.

Chase really hoped Jackie was alright. He hoped his friend wasn’t wrapped up in anything harmful.

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