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lombredanslaeu · 4 years

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hourglass | lee jeno

▸angst, fluff i guess??

▸ summary: sometimes, love just ain’t enough.

▸ WARNING: eating disorder, depression, body dysmorphia, starvation. if any of the above triggers you or if you are not comfortable, please refrain from reading the story.

All your life, you never really cared about your weight. As an engineering student and a part-time musical theatre actor, you never had the reason to be conscious of your body. Engineering required only your brain; no one cared what you wore or what you looked like in class. Musical theatre didn’t have as much standards for appearance than it does with vocals. Your body wasn’t that bad anyway. You were considered skinny by some and many grew envy about how you could eat so much and not gain a pound immediately. However, your perception of your body changed the day you started dating Lee Jeno.

You met Jeno when his company’s CEO decided to treat its artists with tickets to a Wicked show. You got the greatest opportunity of playing Elphaba; with your impeccable vocal talent, it wasn’t an effort to grace the stage and awe the audience. Your production always valued you not only because of your talent, but also because of your warm personality. You first made eye contact with Jeno when his company’s CEO took them backstage to meet the cast after the show. You had time to talk for a while as the CEO became deep in dialogue with the show’s director. It was Taeil who first initiated a conversation with you as the others, especially the youngsters, were too shy to start a conversation with anyone. As everyone warmed up with the other casts, you never failed to notice how Jeno was love-struck with you.

“Wow, your voice is defying the laws of gravity,” another member, Johnny, said to you.

You blushed and shook off the compliment. “Thank you so much. That meant so much to me.”

Everyone scurried off to different areas on the backstage. You were caught off-guard when one of the younger members, Jeno, talked beside you.

“How long have you been performing?” He asked.

“Only just for a year. I wasn’t planning on making this long-term. I only wanted to play a few shows here and there.” You explained. “but, I just couldn’t pass up the opportunity of being Elphaba.”

“That was one of the greatest performance I’ve seen in so long.” He said. “I actually really enjoy musical theatre.”

“Really?” You asked, shocked by his confession. “What’s your favorite musical?”

“It used to be Cats,” He said, smiling shyly. “But I think know it’s Wicked.”

“Oh please,” You chuckled. “Cats is a really good show.”

He looked at you, laughing shyly. “Do you like frozen yogurt?”

“I like frozen yogurt,” You smiled.

It wasn’t long before you found yourself going on secret dates with the heartthrob. You would bond over coffee, books, and broadway musicals. You never knew he liked musicals. There would days where he would help you practice songs for your next show and you would watch him practice a choreography for a comeback. You both found the one thing that kept you closer and closer: the love for performing.

“Seeing the happy faces of my fans is one thing,” He started, staring off into the night. “But the look on my parents’ as they say how proud they are of me, is what keeps me going.”

You stared at his side profile and swallowed a lump in your throat. “They have every reason to be proud of you.”

He turned his head to meet your eyes. His eyes lingered on yours for a while before looking down at your lips. You blushed at the feeling he had over you.

“You’re really pretty.” He started. The statement took you by surprise. Not a lot of people tell you that you’re pretty but, if it comes from Jeno, any other doesn’t matter anymore.

“You’re not so bad yourself,” You chuckled. You’re not lying. Jeno has the looks that could make anyone wrapped around his fingers. “I feel like I don’t deserve to be under your gaze.”

“Of course you deserve to be looked at.” He said, more seriously this time. “I could build a gallery of you but that would give me more competitors so, I won’t do that.”

“Jeno, if you wanna kiss me, just do it.” You said. You wanted to punch yourself for what you just said. Normally, you would freak out and leave from embarrassment. But now, you held your gaze stronger. You had no idea where the courage came from.

And he did. He kissed you like you were the only thing that mattered. It didn’t end there. Later that night, he showed you how beautiful you are.

Sometimes, he would sneak out, with a member or two, to watch one of your shows. He would stare in awe at how people give you their applause. As the spotlight shine down on you, it was like he was seeing a goddess grace everyone with her beauty.

“Dude, if you don’t ask her out, I’m really gonna do it,” His friend, Jaemin, announced beside him.

“I already beat you into it, punk.” He responded boastfully. The shocked look on his friend’s face made him laugh.

Your peaceful relationship was cut short when his boss found out about the thing going on between you two. To say you were shocked by his calm and accepting nature would be an understatement. His company approved of your relationship. It was like the stars have aligned just for the both of you. The news broke out and spread like wildfire on the internet that night. You were too busy rejoicing with your lover that you failed to notice the threats and harsh comments of furious fans until the next morning.

You were supposed to wake up with the bird chirping and the sun shining just for you. However, you found yourself with an unfamiliar feeling in your gut. It was as if you were scared to do anything and go outside. You knew how ugly criticism from fans could be. You understood that many would not approve of your relationship but you accepted that. His company accepted the relationship and his future in NCT is not affected. At the end of the day, the comments would just float around the internet and disappear before you know it.

“You can block off the comments, you know,” He said.

“Yeah, but I think criticism can always help me improve,” You said. You didn’t want him to hate his fans.

“Those aren’t criticisms, Y/N” He replied. “Those are bashful comments.”

“It’s okay, Jeno.” You smiled, pecking his lips. “I can manage.”

Outfits are an important part in musical theatre. They distinguish which character is which, even if the actor is an understudy. You were casted as Regina George in the musical remake of the hit movie, Mean Girls. The director and costume head requested you wear a crop top and skirt for the role and you said yes; after all, you liked really girly outfits. You were looking over your closet and picked out items that might fit the role. You tried on an outfit that you think was a good combination. You looked at yourself in the mirror and felt a slight wave of worry come across your chest. Jeno’s fans might see your show. What would they think if they saw your body was no match to any female idol that Jeno has interacted with? You walked over to your phone and searched up healthy diets for a good figure.

Jeno had a day off and he wanted to see you practice your songs. You both sat at the couch of your small apartment with lyrics sheet in front of you.

“I wanna have pizza for lunch. What kind do you want?” He asked, fishing his phone out of his pocket to order.

“Oh nothing, I’m kinda watching my figure.” You said, looking down to avoid his eyes. You’re still not comfortable in telling people about your diet, especially to Jeno.

“Are you sure? You can burn those off in work outs anyway.” he said, concern washing over his eyes. It worried him that you weren’t eating. Food was one of the things you both bonded over. You had a fancy palette. He thought it was best to trust in you for now.

“I promise. Olivia makes very good hearty meals. I will eat dinner later.” You said.

With so much going on between theatre and your college life, there is only so much you could do in your free time. Working out would take so much of time and with deadlines as the semester is ending, you couldn’t find any time for it. So, you resulted in skipping meals. You only had two more weeks until the Mean Girls show. You just had to make sure your stomach was flat till the end of the production.

“Do you think my cheeks are too full?” You said to Jeno, squishing your face in front of the mirror.

“I think they suit you.” He said before pinching your cheeks. “It’s also really fun to squish.”

“Ouch,” You chuckled before playfully slapping his wrists away.

“You don’t have to worry about them.” He said, wrapping his arms around you. “They make you who you are.”

“That’s very cheesy, babe,” You said while chuckling.

“Y/N, you don’t have to change because other people wants you to.” He replied, more serious this time. “I’ll make sure you believe that you’re the prettiest girl that I’ve ever seen.”

You were stuck with a question on your Physics quiz. You hadn’t eaten anything since you woke up. While you were standing in front of your mirror, you liked how flat your stomach was. The first show happens tomorrow night and you planned on keeping your body that way until then. The lack of food in your system resulted in your brain not working well. You spent many sleepless nights studying for Physics. Usually, you would have solved this problem in under 5 minutes but right now, you only had a minute left in your quiz and you just can’t seem to figure out what to do. On top of that, you were feeling very light-headed. The ding of your professor’s alarm struck a sharp pain from your ears to your head. You winced as you struggled to stand up. Your seatmate looked over to you, checking if you were okay but you smiled it off. You also regretted telling Jeno about your stupid diet because all he did was bug you if you ate already.

jenobear [11:34 am]: babeee, did u eat already??

jenobear [11:34 am]: oops i forgot u have ur quiz. good luck, love <333

jenobear [11:35 am]: make sure u eat, ok?? I love you.

You sighed and typed out an answer. You said you already ate. You hated lying to him but him being overseas made it easier for you somehow. The night of the show came at last. You sat backstage as Olivia helped you with your hair.

“You look pale. Are you okay?” She asked, concerned.

“Yeah, just a bit light-headed.” You replied. “It’s not like I haven’t performed with a headache before.”

“Okay, sure,” She sighed. She knew you too well. You didn’t like to be bugged with questions, especially if you’re preparing for a show. “Wanna eat at that new wings place? Heard it’s really good.”

“Sure, I could need some wings after the show.” You replied. All you needed was to be in shape for a few hours.

The crowd roared their applause as you, and the other casts, bowed as the show reached its end. You felt a migraine creep up your head and you knew its because you haven’t consumed as much food as you needed to lately. It also felt weird that it made you a bit nauseous when your eyes met the spotlight. You were glad bottles of water is all around the backstage. You picked up your phone and smiled to see messages from Jeno and the other members as well.

jenobear [9:30 pm]: never not proud of you. congrats on your show, love. <3

Lee Haechan [9:45 pm]: Y/N!!! Congrats on your show. I’m sure it’s amazing!

Kim Doyoung [9:50 pm]: Sorry I wasn’t able to go, Y/N. I’m sure you did great tonight, Regina George :)

You smiled and thanked them. You decided you wanted to call Jeno but a notification from a social media site distracted you. One of Jeno’s fans came to see the show and posted pictures of you with the caption “Y/N is very talented! I hope to see more of her shows soon~~” You blushed at the compliment. You know you shouldn’t have but you looked at the replies under the post. Your heart fluttered at the sweet compliments. You thought maybe dating an idol isn’t so bad after all. Over the sea of praise come a harsh comment that caught your eye. “I’m sure her vocals are amazing but she should work on her body.” , “Regina George wouldn’t have a match stick figure.” , “she’s kinda bloated. If only she worked on her love handles, I would like her.” You felt a sickly feeling to your stomach. You took each and every word to heart. You scrolled back up to look at the picture the original poster took. You zoomed in on your body and saw what they were talking about. The girls who played Gretchen and Karen, your character’s fellow mean girls, had Barbie doll bodies. Their curves hit at the right places and they had slim legs. You knew that you shouldn’t let this affect you. You have talent, you have personality. But, you also wanted Jeno’s fans to like you. That led you to texting Olivia to cancel your chicken wings plan.

You prepped yourself to see Jeno again after 2 months. He had schedule after schedule and his team went overseas for at least 2 weeks. You limit your diet to soy milk and water. You looked at yourself in the mirror and you could see the changes. Jeno would definitely notice as well but, you liked how you looked. Your jawline was prominent, your waist was thinner, and even your legs got slimmer. It wasn’t easy slipping out of Olivia’s invites for take out and dinner but you managed, somehow. You started to notice how concerned she got each day, especially this morning.

“I grabbed you breakfast, it’s an omurice.” she said, with a warm smile.

“I can’t eat rice, I’m watching my weight.” You said, slurping down the soy milk.

“Since when did you care about your weight?” She asked.

“Since I realized that my body wasn’t in the right shape.” You made sure none of the words came out as bitter or else, she will suspect something was wrong. She didn’t stop bugging you and it started to make you cranky so you just gave in. After consuming the omurice, you couldn’t deny that you felt better. But the guilt started kicking in and the next thing you know, you’re sticking two fingers down your throat in an attempt to vomit what you just consumed. You stared at the mess on the sink and that’s when you knew something was wrong.

“I missed you so much,” Jeno said, as he held you close to his body.

“How are you, my favorite boy?” You stared lovingly to his eyes.

“A bit tired,” He said, taking off his cap and fixing his hair. “But I slept the whole flight.”

“Do you want to just chill here?” You asked. Everyone in the door went to see a movie with the older members. Jeno and Jisung chose to stay behind since they had plans. He snuggled closer to your body. He noticed how your body didn’t feel familiar. He could definitely tell that you were losing weight.

“I am a bit hungry though,” He responded. He wanted to see you eat. It worried him to the core about thin you were looking lately. It wasn’t obvious when you two would FaceTime but it was more apparent in person. He felt you shift slightly at his response. He spoke before you could. “Have you been trying to lose weight?”

“I just wanted to be more fit.” You said, your heart beating faster each time you lie. “I’m working out.”

As someone who works out to maintain his body, Jeno knew well that your body wasn’t a result of working out. But as someone who cares about their appearance, Jeno also knew that he shouldn’t jump into major conclusions yet. He knew how horrible the talk about weight is and he didn’t want to put you through it. Besides, he knew you and he knows that you wouldn’t lie to him.

You felt conflicted as you noticed that Jeno was becoming concerned about how thin you got. To make him believe that you were well, you agreed in eating take-out with him for lunch. You know what to do after, anyway. As you wait for him to finish showering, you decided to check your social media accounts. You tapped on instagram to replied to a comment Olivia wrote on your new post. You laughed silently at how your friends gave funny compliments. Your eyes browsed through the comment sections. Normally, it would be filled with comments about your face, body, and how you didn’t deserve Jeno. This time, it was filled with compliments about how great you look. “I wish I had her body :(“, “Body goals oh my god”, “SKINNY LEGEND QUEEN”. You felt your cheeks blush at the compliments. You realized that the thinner you got, the more you got full of praise. You intend to keep it that way.

Jeno scrolled through his twitter feed and saw an article from a k-pop news page. It was an article about your drastic weight loss. He looked at the pictures included in the article. There were pictures of you from months ago with your old body. Jeno reminisced the first time you met. You looked healthy and happy. You didn’t have the curviest figure, but you were healthy. Following the old pictures were recent pictures of you, both from your recent social media posts and pictures from fans during your latest theatre shows. Your ribs were more prominent and it created a tidal wave of concern to wash over Jeno. He didn’t realize how much he missed the old you. The one who was never scared to try different food. Now, it was like every time he asked you to eat with him, you always refuse. But, he was too kind to base a fight over your appearance.

You sat across the couch with Olivia. You two decided to watch the latest season of The Office.

“Wait, let me use the bathroom for a while” She announced. While she did her business, a phone on the coffee table in front of you lit up. Your phone was laid beside hers so you looked over to see it was her phone that had the notification. What you didn’t expect was who sent her the message.

You have one new message from Lee Jeno.

You didn’t know what to think. It would be immature of you to accuse them of being unfaithful when you don’t know what the message contained. But why would she text him? Why would he text her? As in on cue, Olivia came back from the bathroom.

“Uhm, Liv” You started. “Why are you texting Jeno?”

She stared at you. She knew what you would think but she promised Jeno she wouldn’t tell you about what they were talking about.

“Oh, you know what?” You said suddenly. “It doesn’t matter. You two can be friends and I trust both of you.” You tried so hard not to sound jealous because you weren’t. Olivia is like a sister to you.

You knew well that she wouldn’t betray you like that. She smiled slightly and offered you the popcorn. You shook your head and she snapped.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Y/N” She said. You were caught off guard by her outburst. “You wanna know why I’m texting Jeno?”

You gulped, maybe you don’t want to know why. You changed so much of yourself to please him, his fans, and his management. If they betrayed you like this, you wouldn’t know what to do.

“You’re starving yourself, haven’t you?” She asked, her eyes burning holes into your skull.

“I-I’m not…” You stuttered. You thought you were good at lying but apparently, you’re not.

“Really?” She said. “Ever since you started dating Jeno, all you cared about was your weight. We don’t eat out anymore. We don’t cook anymore. What bothered you? Is it him? Is it the fans?”

You know you could never blame anyone, but yourself. It wasn’t their fault you turned out this way. It was one thing to hear about your weight loss from concerned fans, but it was another when it’s coming out of your best friend’s mouth. You didn’t realize that tears were falling out. The moment Olivia wrapped her arms around you, everything collapsed. All the pressure, the frustration that built up inside of you for so long. The urge of wanting to eat, to feel what it was like to taste again. The anger you felt for yourself for letting it become this bad. It all collapsed and fell from your eyes.

“Here, there isn’t a lot of sugar in that,” Jeno offered you some cookies. You decided to visit him in the recording studio. You were doing so well. You decided to enrol yourself in a support group, as well, and you’ve never missed a single meeting. But you knew you were only forcing it. You saw Olivia and Jeno cry over your situation. It was unfair that you bring them into your mess. Maybe if you say you’re fine loud enough, you’ll believe it.

“I’m proud of you.” His eyes sparkled as he said those word to you.

“I love you.” You responded, before leaning in for his lips.

It took everything in Jeno to let you know how much he loves you. By the way his lips merge with yours and how his hands worshiped every crevice of your body. Each touch symbolizes that you are the most beautiful person he had ever laid his eyes on. You knew that; but, you wish you could believe it. With every praise that heat your cheeks, comes a wave of hate that consumes it all. Will a beautiful body make it all better for you?

You hurried to your bathroom the second you got home. Olivia was out to her boyfriend’s night, leaving you alone with your habits. As your fingers hit the spot on your throat, you felt the hot bile rise from your stomach. It burned and left a sour taste to the back of your mouth; and you loved it. You missed the sensation of your stomach being empty. You never knew how much you liked the feeling of being empty until you felt it again.

“Am I not enough for you” Jeno spoke, his eyes attached to his hands that are clasped in front of him.

“What are you saying, babe?” You asked. You tried to see where this was going. You made you sure every lie that came out of your mouth was believable; why is he saying those things?

“I try so hard to make sure everything I do for you is enough,” He said. It was obvious in his demeanor that he was tired. “I worry about you all the time. The members try so hard to cover up for me every time I needed to tend to you.”

You chuckled, “So what is this? You’re telling me I’m a pity party?”

“No,” He shook his head, not believing the attitude you’re giving him. Frustration was starting to let itself be known on his features. “What else could you possibly want? I give you love, I give you space. I get tired as well, you know.”

That’s when it dawned on you. Love is not enough. Love won’t come magically and heal everything. Jeno could give you all the love in the world but it won’t be the remedy. Love doesn’t fix everything. You can’t just go up to a broken person and expect romance would suddenly want them to dance on their grave. It doesn’t work that way. You never had the courage to tell him that. In retrospect, you wish you had it in you to say it.

“You’re enough for me, Jeno.” You said quitely. You didn’t know what else to say. All this time, you never blamed him. But here he is now, throwing it all back at you. You still won’t blame him though, he doesn’t know what it feels like; you’re glad he doesn’t know how it feels like.

“I don’t know how to help you if you can’t help yourself.” He said, sighing as if he has given up. Maybe he has given up. The people who left you before has taught you to swallow every plead to make them stay. That’s the only think you could stomach to swallow right now - the words to make him fight a little longer. You didn’t know how much long it would be for you to be okay, or if you could actually be okay. But, you knew better than to run after others when you can’t even stand for yourself. Some nights, you feel yourself drown in cold sweat. Your body felt like it could give up on you any minute. You laid still and wait; but it never came. You wondered how much longer.

Jeno has a bright future ahead of him. The news of him being single again gave him new schedules that would give him exposure to different opportunities. He didn’t regret leaving. He still occasionally see your musical shows just to check how you are. You will never know this but he hopes it’s always sunny wherever you are.

a/n: i hope you liked this. this hit close to home. i would like to remind you that if you are experiencing symptoms of any mental illness, please check with a professional. mental health is a topic that i hold deeply in my heart since i have experience from mental illnesses. i would also like to remind everyone to always be kind to others - whether it would be our friends, people we don’t like, and even idols. let’s not contribute to anything that could affect them negatively. as always, feedback and requests are always appreciated. love u all <33

#lee jeno #jeno x reader #jeno x you #nct jeno #jeno imagines #jeno angst #lee jeno angst #nct dream #nct au #nct dream imagines #jeno timestamps #jeno fluff #nct imagines

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knyenthusiast · 5 years

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Kimetsu no yaiba as a

k-drama

Lowkey inspired by boys over flowers, literally everyone x reader,, just introducing the characters roles if they were in the k-drama. Probably gonna do more with this au plot ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I feel like this isn’t a kdrama based au but a WATTPAD GENUINE GUIDE STORY,,

You know those types of dramas where every boy or girl story x you, and you either get bullied or maybe loved, popular etc, am trying to do that

I’ll be using girl pronouns because,, gender neutral pronouns is a bit hard in this one, sorry 😔!!!

Tanjiro : would be the first kid that pops up to you when you first entered the school, since you just moved in the school. He would introduce himself and show you around the school, the teacher doesn’t mind him skipping class because he’s the goody two shoes of the school, you weren’t really surprised by the fact that he is, he radiates soft boy energy. Oh yeet surprise surprise, you’re in the same class as him, he might actually have to tutor you, he would actually voluntarily ask

“Would you like me to help ?”

You might sometimes borrow his homework if you forgot to go yours, hehe. He wouldn’t let you but you were too cute so,,,

He has a girl, who follows him around and you asked him who she is oh!?

Nezuko: , loves you so much, treats you as a little sibling no matter the age, she lowkey wants to be dominant for once. Takes really good care of you, i feel as if she would bake cookies for you or like buy you snacks and banana korean milk and gives it to you every morning, so you can have more energy for the day, gay for you but doesn’t show it much,

If you were into kpop, I’m pretty sure she would be neutral with you screaming to your kpop husbands but she also secretly tries to learn your kpop husbands just so she could scream with you and talk to you more but is still a confused baby,,,and tanjiro would just look at you, conFusiOn intensifies,

This is where zenitsu pops up: and is literally the woman magnet,

“TANJIRO YOU HAD A CHIC ALL ALONG?!”

He was so eager, and screamed, the classmates doesn’t even bother looking, since it’s the usual, but since there was you involved, loOks his way. He’s that one sad kid who wants a lover but never gets one because people think he’s a loud sad cry baby, he’s close to tanjiro because tanjiro was the only one who accepted his obnoxious ass. He quickly tries to make a move on you after you breathed. He tries to look cool infront of the ladies, thinks he’s a pro with the chics, but isn’t.

“Did you know that I’m the hall monitor ?”

Tries to impress you and fails because tanjiro kept on spitting the truth about him to you and zenitsu quickly screams at him and tells him to shut up.

Class has started !

The teacher had told you to introduce yourself in front of the class and suddenly...

B A M

door opens, another flower boy slams opens the door , toast in the mouth. Clothes, belongings and hair messy, casually walks to his seat, doesn’t care that the teacher is scolding him, he does as he wants

Inosuke : opens his top buttons a bit to show that he ain’t no girlie, has a very pretty face, secretly a softie, causes trouble, lowkey bullies tanjiro but not too harsh on him, apart of tanjiros friend group, feral loud baby, ain’t that smart so at one point you had to tutor him. Really likes the idea of teasing,

Inosuke : causes trouble

Tanjiro : gets him out of trouble

Would be that one person who gives out bad advice,

Craves for your compliments, he tries to do everything better than you but fails, tries to blackmail you to praise him, very competitive, but I swear he is a supportive friend, he just....

Doesn’t look like it.

Pretty girl has appeared and greeted you!

Kanao : everyone loves her, she isn’t mean. The calm one of the class and the smart A+ student and says that 97 as a score is still not good enough. Somewhat passive aggressive, always a smile on her face, she just suddenly sticks herself to you because she’s concerned, you were already glued to 3 guys,,,, and the one girl,,, your somewhat trustable girlfriend.

Would always scold you, she’s just so concerned for your well being,

You were walking down the hallway till

Oh no!

You saw a crowd and In the middle was a fight between to very tall men and they were both covered with scars !

The shinazugawa bros :

Genya : after you saw him fighting who you thought was a bully but was actually his brother, you tried to help him but he kept on pushing you away because, he doesn’t want a girl knowing his problems, he’s usually alone. It’s not like he hates girls no no no, he’s very shy. Doing his stuff alone, everyone fears him, but not as much as they fear his brother. A bit of neutral with the classmates but they still somewhat fear him.

You were suddenly paired with him for a project so you knew you had to get close to him somehow, he told you that he would do all the stuff for the project and told you to leave him alone but you kept on following him around, tanjiro warned you about him that he was scared he might attack you or something, zenitsu being the protective boy he is told you to s t o p, cried rivers of tears, but you told them you had this all under control,

In the end you two bonded and became good friends

+ 1 genya to tanjiros friend group. He now hangs out with you guys,

Sanemi : OH BOI, R U D E, doesn’t care if everyone can see his bara bara tiddies, even the teachers were scared of him, like damn he looked menacing, especially with his scars,

Apart of this outside of school gang,,,,

You wanted to confront him about the genya problem and he should’ve taken better care of his brother, so you went up to him and his friend, probably his only friend rengoku,,, and he was like

“Go away, pimp”

Really dislikes you at first, he might actually be a bully to you, because you annoyed him so much, but you guys might fall in love suddenly like, BAM. Yes this is what usually happens, the bully might actually fall in love with the one he bullies as obnoxious as it sounds. :x,

Everyone’s worried for you because, a GORL going up to THE SHINAZUGAWA BARA TIDDIES SANEMI Like WOAH,,, everyone warned you like, even your classmates,,,

Rengoku : has a pack of girls making a fan club for him, he’s a very popular guy indeed

“You can’t touch rengoku oppa 😩🤬”

But he just sticks himself to you so his fan girls won’t touch you and hurt you, he is Genuinely a nice guy, wants to help as much as he can as a senior, Since he’s sanemis only best friend, he would always say sorry to you if sanemi has hurted you by any chance, says sorry for his behalf, honestly... trusts you with ‘tanjirou my boy’.He’s really neutral with anything but he’s very protective over sanemi,

Come and question me but I ship sanemi and rengoku. Come fight me.

He Has a little brother, and talks about all his little brothers achievement because he loves his brother, you two would go to the park and have hangouts a lot, he’s apart of the baseball club :,^). Shines like the sun, you gave him a sunflower once and he cherished it because it was from s/o and he loves you.

Himejima : would also most likely be around sanemi and rengoku, hehh, the three make a great team, himejima is probably busy doing student council activities since he is the leader/head, he has great leadership things and always corrects zenitsu on doing his hall monitoring job correctly, but he hangs out with his friends as well, people kind of question on why he’s friends with sanemi, since bad guy and good guy, doesn’t make any sense, but himejima can be a gangsta as well, he sometimes helps sanemi bail out of class,

Gangsta🤙

Y’all gangsta till himejima finally snaps and gets his portable axe out of his backpack, people count him as the most chillest head student council ever, because the previous ones were way strict than him, but I swear he gets things done as well!, passive aggressive way, says things nicely but what he’s saying is demanding, also apart of the baseball team and basketball!, you see him a lot there and he looks hot there 😳, he smiles when he senses you around him, don’t underestimate him,

There’s this one girl with this devious smile plastered on her face,, I wonder who she is?

Shinobu : best girl, everhone has this weird senior relationship with her, since sometimes we all can get along well but when she serious and angry, you don’t miss with her, just because she small, don’t mean she has no power,

She the chief student council, don’t mess with her,

Teases you a lot because you surrounded by the oppars, and the hotties, passive aggressive aswell, especially with that smile of her, sometimes unpredictable, but she tries to be close to giyuu?, wonder who that is, teases him but he doesn’t really care, some of his fan club hates her and some loves her, but giyuu and shinobu sometimes make a good team and she watches over you well even tho it doesn’t look like it since she teases you a lot

A bigger crowd has emerged, ! What’s that ? A guy in the middle???? Has a spikey pony tail?? Hmmm???

Giyuu : really awkward, but is smart boy, he doesn’t really know what’s going on around him, but he actually has a bigger fangirl base than rengoku’s,

Girls swoon over him, crave for his attention, Lucky you, he had interest for you but didn’t show it much, how did you know him?, he helped you pick up your fallen books in the library, and first love music intensifies *

let me think of a kpop song, OH WAIT

Park kyung - inferiority complex

Day6 - when you love someone

STAN DAY 6 OMG PMENALFLAJGLOQ,; have y’all heard of time of our life by day6 like uhM BITJ SNAPPED, ok continue. I’m a jyp Stan so like 🤭

he played hard to get, so you went to him and asked him stuff while he ignores you but actually enjoys the time together, you follow him around with Tanjiro because Tanjiro also wants to know him better,

You’d visit him every morning, and share to him nezukos banana milk that she gives you every morning :,^),,,, jkjkjj you bought your own banana milk and gave it to him, but he looked as if he doesn’t care but he secretly drinks it.

Sabaito: big BABY, acts like the maknae *young kid* but is actually the most experienced, I feel as if he would be a perfectionist but no one would really notice it ?, the only one who could get giyuu to smile, knows everything about giyuu, the number one ship from both fanclubs,

Whose both?

Sabito and giyuuus fanclub OF COURSE!,

Would be that one ghost kid, sometimes mysterious, sometimes eaves drops, sometimes competitive, but he just wants the best for the earth and lead a better generation, leadership type of guy, if there were to be a senior x junior event, the teachers would most likely pair him with you since, there’s a lot to be learnt from him,

Would be asked to tutor you, very popular among the moms,

‘Have you heard about all of sabitos achievements?’

‘Must be so lucky to have him as a son!’

Your mom would lowkey ship you with him, and ask him to tutor you more,

Every mom would approve of him

Y’all thought he big brain but he medium sized baby, giyuu would most likely be found around him, you see sabito? There has to always be giyuu, or else there would be something wrong, he sometimes quirky, and tries to speak slang, but that just breaks his character,

Fan service with giyuu, and he would always make the first move, looks out for giyuu and you aswell,

But he trusts tanjiro to do that, but sometimes don’t trust him aswell,

The two would always be found in food areas, such as the tempura shop near school, and food fairs,

Sabito has an Instagram about food but never posts his face, typical,

Since giyuu was a tease he told every girl in his fan club he’d date the girl who gets his Rolex watch from the scary cat near the school area, damn giyuu with cla$$

You went searching for the cat, you knew it was dangerous but you tried to go to the cat anyways and now you were full of the cats scratches, :(

You were so exhausted that you laid down under a tree. You didn’t know there was a boy next to you. He had long black hair with blue tips at the end of his hair...

Muichiro : he really likes cloud gazing, his special spot is the tree you just found while searching for the nasty cat. He Is actually close to tanjiro but he doesn’t hang out with him much because his friend group was too loud, he easily dozed off but tries his best to listen to you.

At first your relationship with him was just a quiet atmosphere but that changed till you got to know him better,,, so here you are cloud gazing with him, and he just tells you random things with his soft voice, he’s very mysterious, more mysterious than giyuu actually... he likes sleeping in class so whenever you go to his class for recess, you have to wake him up, and let me just tell you that he looks CUTE, he skipped a few grades because he was just too smart...

While cloud gazing, two people were screaming muichiros name??? Who could they be ???

Mitsuri : really concerned for muichiro, really loud and energetic, the nicest purest girl you met, the whole school loves her, gymnastic club, real flexible, dancer baby, but more to ballet because she’s elegant, lots of guys ask her out but she’s kind of taken by y’all know who... she was searching for muichiro because she was worried about him, he didn’t look well that day and the school nurse told her to give him some pills... so here she was searching for him. Really determined to find him.

You didn’t know muichiro was sick because he always looked pale, but today he sounded off, so here you are with mitsuri, trying to make muichiro eat his pills and feeding him before he gets his pills, since it was recess, he was really shy because you were feeding him, he internally passed out, this was probably your first time seeing him this shy around you, but since you thicc as a brick and you didn’t get any hints yet, you thought he was just very sick.

A cold atmosphere had emerged, whose giving off this aura?

IGURO: really cold, protective over his gf, deals with the bs around mitsuri since mitsuri is lowkey like a child, he’s a bit neutral towards you, and muichiro, yoU four look like a happy family,

The first time you two met, uhm- he was really cold and gave you a glare, but since mitsuri had literally glued herself to you, he had no choice but to spare you and muichiro was close to you as well!, you two are at a neutral bond stage, you can get a long, sometimes can figt as well, he slick as f,

Sometimes appear at times you don’t want him to appear, eavesdropping at its finest, lowkey claimed himself as your protective brother from another mother.

And your day is always full of randomness when you’re with them, they very precious beans and they all love you and would figt for your love

#kimetsu no yaiba giyuu #kimetsu no yaiba mitsuri #kimetsunoyaiba #kimetsu no yaiba #kimetsu anime #knysource #kny icons #kny manga #knyedit #kny x reader #kny anime #kny #kny zenitsu #anime #headcanons #headcanon #kimetsu no yaiba inosuke #kny giyuu #inosuke kny

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wandaluvstacos · 5 years

Text

There are things that are terrible but that I can understand why people like it. 50 Shades of Grey is objectively awful. But it’s porn for people who don’t get out much, so I get it. Twilight is bad, but I get it. Girls wanna read about a sparkly boy who is the one who resists sex (as opposed to always asking for it) and who is rich and hot and also undead. I can forgive a lot of terrible things if the explanation for its popularity is “people are horny af”.

But there are things I absolutely hate that everyone else loves and I just... don’t get it at all. Like, I feel like I’ve entered the Twilight Zone, a place where everyone insists the color red is in fact the color green and when I insist it’s red, everyone else is like “are u dumb”.

For example, I hate Sailor Moon. I hate it so much. I hated it when I watched it as a kid. I’ve watched it as an adult and it hasn’t grown on me at all. In fact, it dredges up all my old bitter feelings about it that I felt about it as a girl. I have zero idea why anyone could point to it and claim it’s a feminist show. It’s literally a show about a girl who hates school and loves to shop and loses her goddamn mind every time a boy arrives to save her ass. Her friends are fine, and honestly, if the show didn’t include Serena at all, I’d have about 80% less hatred for it. I had a lot of internalized a lot of misogyny in middle school, and Sailor Moon really catered to it. I didn’t want to be like those “other” girls, those “other” girls being dumb asses like Serena. Ugh, even now I get pissed off talking about it.

I also really hated Battle Royale. I don’t think I would have hated it as much if at the time I weren’t reading it because my friend insisted I should if I liked Hunger Games, and everyone was FREAKING OUT about how Hunger Games was TOTALLY a knock-off of Battle Royale and how Battle Royale was SERIOUS LITERATURE and not some DUMB GIRLY BOOK about PTSD and war crimes (girly subjects, ya know). It read like a goddamn teenage boy’s fanfiction. I understand it was translated into English, so maybe some of the nuance was lost in translation, but the fact that the author decided to make at least two of the kids insanely intelligent and perfect psychopaths straight out of some B-rated horror movie was so dumb. Teenagers can’t even figure out how to buy stamps, apparently. And you’re telling me they can rig up murder machines on a remote island and ruthlessly destroy all their classmates... just cuz they’re evil? It reminded me so much of the stuff my brother used to ask me to read when he was young. Like, it was fine for him because he was 13. It’s not so good for a grown man to write some mastermind murdering psychopath genius into ONE random high school class, cuz that would be “cool”. There was hardly any emotional development or connection with the characters, and so many characters were introduced and then immediately murdered that I felt like skipping through half the book because I didn’t care about the character, since I knew they’d be killed anyway, so why waste my time. That might have been the point of the book, but I would hope you wouldn’t write a book for an audience to read half of before only finishing it out of spite. The weird thing was that my friend who suggested it REALLY loved it, and we are similar in a lot of ways, and I just couldn’t understand what she could possibly like about it, and that was our first and only big fight. About Battle Royale. Which may contribute to my dislike of it. It made me argue with someone I never argue with. :T

I also don’t get Twitter, but that’s another story.

#personal

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akaiaowl-tales · 6 years

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Reality in Motion Ch3 (Mileven - Modern College AU)

Chapter 3: Something just like this

Monday 4th, December 2017

Tap. Tap. Tap.

The pencil was repeatedly hitting the table. It was rather annoying.

“Could you stop that?” a girl asked dryly.

Trying to focus on the book she was currently reading, El was completely oblivious to the girl’s question and continued tapping the pencil on the wooden library table. She’d already reread that paragraph several times, and yet she couldn’t seem to come up with a coherent sentence to summarize it.

It was very difficult to concentrate on books and notes when her thoughts kept stubbornly wandering off from academics and reminding her of something she still was too embarrassed to allow herself to think about. She felt her cheeks starting to warm and, for what felt like the thousandth time that day, chastised herself for her own stupidity. She needed to stop thinking about Mike Wheeler.

“Ohmygod, are you freaking deaf?” the girl tapped her shoulder.

Startled by the sudden touch that wrenched her away from her restless mind, El almost jumped off from her chair and barely managed to stifle a shriek. El looked at the annoyed redhead girl with huge, clueless brown eyes.

The girl’s angry face fell, probably feeling guilty because of her aggressiveness.

“Just stop the noise, ok? The table is not a drum set,” the girl said with an almost guilty tone of voice, looking away quickly.

--….--…--…---

El had finally finished the chapter summary notes. Feeling quite accomplished and hungry after spending most of her afternoon studying, she stretched her cramped limbs and gathered her stuff.

The girl who had startled her was still there, sitting next to her and frowning, nose-deep in a bulky book. El wondered whether she should apologize or something. Truth was, most of the times, she felt completely clueless about how to act in certain social situations and this was no exception.

Just as she stood up to leave, the girl looked up at her.

“Hey, I’m so sorry about how rude I was earlier, but you and your drumming skills were annoying the heck outta me and I’m having trouble as it is with the stupid reading material”, she said, speaking really quickly.

“Anyway, I would hate to finish my first semester here making an enemy,” she continued, grimacing wryly at that.

“I get it. I also have trouble concentrating,” El answered cautiously, feeling very nervous. She tried to avoid looking at the girl’s piercing blue eyes.

“So, are you leaving already? To have dinner?” she asked, while saving her books in her maroon backpack.

Just when El opened her mouth to reply, the girl stood up too.

“Mind if I tag along,” somehow she managed to avoid phrasing it as a question.

This is going to be so awkward.

Having no other option after that, Eleven nodded and followed the feisty girl down the silent hall.

They both got out from the library together and walked towards the cafeteria. The girl – who introduced herself as Max Mayfield – immediately started complaining about her Government and Politics class (“I hate watching the news! I get bored listening to candidate speeches! WHY did I even chose this class to waste my extra credits in? ... I guess it’ll remain one of life’s biggest mysteries”).

Apparently, the redhead girl was kinesthetically intelligent – which explained her mechanical engineering major –, and that made the whole situation a lot more unexplainable and bizarre. Max was obviously one of those very fun, active, and talkative persons. It didn’t cease to amuse her how the redhead could quickly jump from one topic of conversation to another tirelessly. Much to her surprise, El found herself laughing along with her witty remarks and actually finding her really likable.

She was quite entertained by Max’s sarcastic humor and loud personality. Also, the redhead seemed unfazed by Eleven’s shyness and overall quietness, which was unexpected and really nice.

Listening to someone else’s problems helped her take her mind off what had happened that weekend and stopped her from paying attention to the cruel voice of her insecurities. As opposed to what she had been first expecting, El found the whole situation made her feel rather perky and comfortable.

“By the way, I’ve seen you before?” Max asked.

“I don’t thi-”

She interrupted her midsentence, and it suddenly dawned on El that Max was a big fan of rhetoric questions.

“Of course! You were that girl at Steve’s party!”

“That girl?” El asked, unsure about whether she should be offended or not.

“Yeah, the one with the rad dance moves.”

She blushed and couldn’t help smiling at that, remembering her sore feet and legs the morning after the party. Tentatively, she finally allowed herself to think about what she had been avoiding for almost three days now.

It really was an awesome night…

“Do you know Lucas Sinclair?” Max suddenly asked. “Wait. Why are you blushing? Do you like Lucas?”

El snapped back to reality.

“Wh-What? Will’s friend Lucas? Lucas the tall, serious guy?”

Max only stared at her with her mouth slightly agape.

“I don’t like him, I barely know him!” El answered a bit too fast, it really was the most stupid question in the world.

Max, however, still sported a suspicious expression.

If she only knew.

“Why? Do you like him, Max?”

Now it was Max’s turn to blush.

“Oh, shut up,” she said looking away, “I haven’t finally made a friend I actually find interesting so that we sit here gossiping about boys like it’s fucking high school”.

El couldn’t agree more.

--….--…--…---

Thursday 7th, December 2017

*3 missed calls from MY FAVORITE PERSON IN THE WORLD*

9:03 am WHY DON’T U PICK UP THE PHONE??????????????

*1 missed call from MY FAVORITE PERSON IN THE WORLD*

11:47 am U WORRY ME

*2 missed calls from MY FAVORITE PERSON IN THE WORLD*

She knew she couldn’t avoid him anymore.

Even though she had been successful until then – having Max as a friend had come in quite handy –, Will and her had class together on Thursday afternoons. History 102 was the class Will took as an elective just to be with her. The only way to avoid her best friend was skipping class. And El Ives never cut class. It had been hard enough getting into college with a scholarship to feel careless enough to do something like that.

Worst thing was, she wasn’t even sure why she felt so mortified about the possibility of Will saying or asking something about the party. It wasn’t like she was hiding something. Nothing major had really happened. Had it?

An innocent kiss goodbye on the cheek means nothing.

But there was nothing innocent about the weird way she felt when she remembered the feel of his big, warm palm steadying her. The cute way his dark wavy hair fell on his face, almost covering his eyes. The funny tilt of his head when he was listening to something that interested him.

Cut it out El. You’re making this a much bigger deal than it is like you always do. Heck! THERE IS NOT EVEN A “DEAL” TO TALK ABOUT.

It hurt her to listen to the ruthless voice in her head, but, as much as she hated to admit it, El knew it was probably right.

It had happened countless times before. Well, actually two. Two times in which El found herself feeling funny and giddy and hopeful about someone, only to be disappointed. It always ended that way. She was destined to be alone and it was probably for the best.

It’s probably because of all that rom-com trash you watch all the time.

She felt so guilty. Guilty about her stupid feelings, about her stupid thoughts, about her stupid hope, about her stupid attitude, about her stupid irrational fear for something that wasn’t even happening.

Worst of all, she knew her internal crisis was really no reason to be such a shitty friend to Will. He was the one who had always, always been there for her and now she was hiding things from him?

She was such a mess.

“Ellie? You ok?” Max asked with concern, looking at her expectantly.

This was the first time she ever called her ‘Ellie’.

Max had been so relieved to find a girl she actually found likable – most of the students in her classes were boys and she had gotten tired of only having male friends – and El was just as happy to have someone as nice, understanding, and extroverted as Max being her friend – also, apparently, she’d needed Max in her life to “coach her on stupid girly things that are totally dumbass but, sadly, necessary to survive in this society”.

Noticing Max’s concern, El was successfully distracted away from her restless thoughts and looked up from her phone to face her new friend’s scrutinizing gaze. She was all too aware of the guilt written all over her face.

“Yeah, it’s just Will”, she replied to Max’s question (for once without being interrupted!), biting her lip.

Max looked thoughtful. Despite their short friendship, the girls spent most of their free time together and knew a lot about each other so far. Max had even introduced Eleven to some of her closest friends. Of course, later, when El had mentioned her high school best friend and his friends, Max was very excited to meet them too (Eleven suspected it had something to do with her friend’s vehemently denied fondness of Lucas Sinclair). Therefore, El had to confess to Max that she was actively avoiding Will.

“Alright”, she said crossing her arms, “I think it’s finally time for you to spill the beans about why you are avoiding him.”

El looked away, trying to focus on anything other than Max’s stern face. She knew her friend only intended for the best, but she was way too embarrassed to tell her about her childish crush on Mike Wheeler.

“I think it’s not healthy, El”, Max continued, “The poor guy is probably worried sick”.

“I know! Ok?! This whole situation is affecting me so much too”, El finally confessed, letting all of her anxiety pour into her words.

Her hand trembling as she adjusted her shoulder-length wavy hair behind her ear.

“I’m so freaking worried I’ll lose my best friend over a stupid crush of all things. And everything, because I cannot stop thinking about what will happen the next time Will asks me to hang out with them”, El finally gushed out, completely unable to stop herself from revealing the reason behind her distress.

“WHOAH”, Max’s shocked blue eyes were wide as saucers, “HOLD. THE HELL. ON.”

El tried to mentally prepare herself for the upcoming inevitable onslaught of questions.

“So you do like Lucas?”

W H A T.

El let out a giggle and then started full on laughing unstoppably at her friend’s confused expression. She couldn’t breathe.

What the hell?

Her stomach was contracting painfully at her effort to stop laughing.

“No”, she finally admitted after her laugh subsided enough for her to talk.

“I have a crush on Mike Wheeler”.

--….--…--…---

“Hey! What’s going on with you?” asked Will, plopping down on the chair beside her, “I almost thought you were dead”.

Too nervous to stay still, she’d come super early to the History class she had with Will.

She had spent almost all lunch time telling Max about what happened at the party. However, contrary to what Eleven had expected, Max had insisted that it seemed obvious to her that Mike Wheeler was as interested as El was.

She also stressed that she thought El’s crush on him was not stupid. Nonetheless, El could not help feeling scared of the gush of hope she felt at her friend’s encouraging words. Hope was never good.

Plus, the possibility of something actually happening made everything a little bit harder. It made El’s mind wander off into cheesy fantasies she never had allowed herself to have before. It made the fluttering in her stomach a whole lot worse. It made her feel nervous and jittery and girly. And it scared her because it was new.

It made Eleven feel a lot unlike her usually phlegmatic self.

She turned to look at her best friend and couldn’t help the guilty blush from spreading on her cheeks.

“I made a friend – well actually she made me her friend…” said El, smiling at the memory of her new lively friend, “and, well, I’ve been spending a lot of time with her”.

Will seemed shocked at that and then smiled.

“I’m happy for you, El, but why were you ignoring my texts and calls for days?” he asked, looking hurt.

He knew she would never, ever, replace him.

“El, you can tell me anything at all, you know that”, he said, “did anything at all happen at that party? Are you mad at me for dragging you there and then leaving you all alone? I’m so sorry!” he babbled, looking almost on the verge of tears.

The few students in the class were starting to stare at them.

She sort of panicked. Why was she such a terrible friend? Will had been worried about her, probably thinking the worst and here she was, avoiding him for such a stupid reason. She hated herself.

“Will no, I’m NOT mad at you… everything at the party was great”, El said truthfully and Will seemed confused.

“It was the best night of my life, I will forever remember it as my ultimate college experience, I am forever indebted to you for it”, she continued, trying to make her best friend laugh at her weak-ass attempt at replicating Max’s sarcastic humor.

Will’s smile was more of a grimace.

“Are you sure about that?”

“You know I would tell you if something was wrong”, El said, “Friends don’t lie”.

Everything seemed back to normal after that. They caught up with everything that had been going on those last few days. Will told El about his terrible hangover after the party and how “stupid Mike got us derailed for some reason and we finally got to the dorm at, like, 6 am” (El discreetly blushed at that, trying to hide a smile). El told Will about meeting Max and how, interestingly enough, she seemed to know Lucas (though she skipped the part in which she suspected about Max’s secret crush).

“Oh, so SHE was the cute redhead he was talking to all night?” Will said, realization dawning in on him, “I remember her! Her name seemed so familiar… BECAUSE SHE’S IN OUR APPLIED PHYSICS CLASS!”

Will looked as happy as the day Joyce got him all the vintage X-Men figurines for his birthday.

This was such big gossip material.

“I can’t believe it! And now you’re her friend!? We gotta get those two together! We gotta hang out sometime, we have to-”

El was giggling at Will’s enthusiasm, but they had to cut their conversation short because the professor arrived at that very moment.

At the second hour of the class, El was suddenly distracted by her phone vibrating in her bag. She carefully took it out and saw a text from Will.

5:14 pm Still not off the hook! u owe me an explanation about why u were acting so weird.

El sighed, she had been hoping that Will would forget about that tiny detail. She typed a short answer, wondering what in the world she would tell her best friend.

5:14 pm OK.

5:15 pm After class

--….--…--…---

The class ended faster than El expected. She actually found the topic they were currently going over quite interesting, which pushed all other thoughts away from her mind. Including thoughts about how to evade Will’s questions.

I’ll just go for the truth… if he asks, sure it’s embarrassing but I cannot lie to my best friend.

The thing that worried her the most though was Will’s reaction to the news. Would he play matchmaker (like he was currently planning to do with Max and Lucas)? Would he tell her something she would not want to hear (like maybe that she was getting her hopes up for nothing)? Would he be mad and hurt because she had kept it all from him? Would he be weirded out?

Will and El were among the last students to leave the class.

“So… What’s up? Please don’t tell me that I did something while I was drunk and embarrassed you or something”, Will said, looking horrified at the prospect.

Eleven had never seen Will drunk. At high school they had been the quiet losers that never went to parties, but she knew he had gone to a few ragers at college with his new friends. She wondered what kind of drunk her nice, quiet best friend was.

“No, I uh… actually don’t remember seeing you after you left me dancing”, she said.

“You’re too much of a pro to keep up with”, he joked.

“Hey! Max and I bonded over my amazing dance moves!”

He laughed at that.

“I like her already”, Will added.

El knew she had to say something, tell her best friend everything.

She didn’t know where to start.

“I was just worried about what you would think about me aft-”, she began apologetically before Will interrupted her.

“El, I would never judge you for being a drunk dancer, you know that”, he said sympathetically, completely missing the point.

“Plus, I’ve done things way more embarrassing than dancing”, he continued.

Will went ahead and told her about something that happened at the party.

“…and the last thing I remember is being found by Mike and then dragging myself into the car”, he told her, “and you were asleep on the copilot’s seat”.

El tried not to look too guilty.

“Yeah, I guess I was pretty tired after dancing my feet off”, she said.

“Who knew you secretly take cardio dancing lessons”, Will chuckled.

She punched his arm softly.

“So, how did you finally get to the car?” Will wondered.

“Well, I found Mike outside while trying to get some air and we just talked a bit”, she said, hesitating to expand on her answer.

Will’s curiosity, however, seemed placated without her having to elaborate on the great time she had.

El couldn’t hide her relief at getting off the hook so easily.

It wasn’t like she had actively lied to Will, or hid anything from him. She’d just gone along with the conversation… which happened to skip through the very embarrassing topic she wasn’t yet willing to discuss with her best friend.

“Yeah, he said the same”.

El was dying to ask if Mike had said something else about it, or about her.

They walked around campus in silence for a while. Both deep in thought.

“Is it OK if all of us hang on Saturday?” Will asked, taking out his phone.

“Uh… I guess, I know Max is free and we were going to hang out together anyway”.

El was secretly hoping to see Mike again.

Which was childish and stupid. But, hey, Max had said her crush was okay and her opinion counted. Didn’t it? She was supposed to know much more about life and guys and relationships than she did.

“Cool, tell her we’re having lunch together”

--….--…--…---

Saturday 9th, December 2017

Lucas’ facial expression was priceless.

Will, Mike and Dustin shared a knowing look when they saw El and Max coming out of their dorm building. The four guys were sitting on a bench not too far from it.

Ever since Will had told them about their Saturday plans, they’d tried for about two days to stop themselves from bullying Lucas too much about his evident and quite cute crush on Max. However, they all knew this outing was mostly for his benefit (and because Will wanted to prove his matchmaking skills) and their resolve finally broke that morning, resulting in at least two hours of merciless teasing.

Which had resulted in reducing the usually grounded and confident Lucas into a blabbering, nervous mess.

He must really like her, Mike thought with a smile.

“Just try not to make your ‘Lucas aka Chocolate Daddy’ impression until, at least, the fifth date and you’ll probably do fine”, Mike teased loudly, trying to emulate his friend’s ridiculous voice (and failing miserably).

Dustin broke out in a laughing fit and Will smiled widely at the comment. Truth was, Mike had been feeling nervous himself about going out with the two girls and had tried to hide his anxiousness by being especially annoying to Lucas.

The girls finally reached them. They all greeted each other a little awkwardly and tried discussing what to get for lunch. Mike, however, was otherwise preoccupied (definitely not watching a certain brunette girl) and couldn’t help noticing that El blushed whenever their eyes met. It was cute.

His reaction to her was probably the same one, he realized bashfully.

From his conversations with Will so far, he had gathered that, like himself, she had also dodged Will’s questions and had not been completely honest about what happened last Saturday. He wondered why the both of them were so reluctant to admit to their friends what had happened the night of the party. It wasn’t as if something huge or terribly life changing had happened. Right?

He needed to talk to her about it, but was worried about making everything an even bigger deal. When it wasn’t. It clearly wasn’t.

After a while, everyone finally agreed to go to Taco Bell.

“Mike, didn’t you offer to drive?” Dustin asked innocently.

He hadn’t offered, but knew this was probably planned. This, especially considering that the only ones in their group with a car of their own were Lucas and himself. And there was no way in hell the guys were letting Lucas drive when they could force him to interact with his crush instead. Right in front of their prying eyes.

“I did, didn’t I?” Mike answered thoughtfully, “and we all know how serious I am about keeping my promises.”

Lucas threw a murderous look in his direction, knowing all too well what his friends were up to. Mike pretended not to notice.

Will and Dustin made sure that Lucas sat right next to Max in the back seat of the car, sandwiched between them and their giddy glances. Since there was almost no room, Max was almost sitting on Lucas’ lap, which made the whole situation even more awkward and all the more entertaining for Will and Dustin.

By that moment, Lucas was a permanent stuttering wreck and Max’s cheeks had gradually blushed to the point her face was now almost the same shade of red her hair was.

Needless to say, the guys’ antics were pretty evident by then.

“Next time we all go out, I’m driving too,” Lucas said grumpily.

El nervously got into the front seat, trying not to think about just how different this situation was from the one last week. She sat and looked at Mike, who was starting the car. She smiled as an unruly strand of wavy black hair fell onto his face, and suddenly found herself avoiding the sudden impulse to bush it away from his eyes.

Since they were effectively cut out from whatever was happening at the back seat, Mike and El began a casual chat, telling each other about their classes and majors. It turned out that El was a psychology major and Mike a physics major, which probably should mean their interests were very different. However, on that short ride they found out they had quite a few common interests besides their weird love for breakfast – like their preference for indie music, the fact that both of them were night owls, their mutual fondness for film-watching, and an (unhealthy) obsession with all things Harry Potter related.

It was no surprise to either of them to realize that they liked each other’s company the more time they spent together.

--….--…--…---

Lunch had been memorable.

The guys finally got to meet boisterous Max and immediately liked her loud personality and sarcastic humor. The atmosphere had relaxed a lot by that point and even quiet El felt comfortable enough to actively intervene in the conversation – which was currently focusing on a passionate discussion about whether the Harry Potter movies were good enough and lived up to the books.

“Of course the movies can’t even be compared to the books but they are still good!” Will exclaimed in frustration.

“I mean, as much as I love Emma Watson, I will never get over the frustration of the ‘HARRY DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE’ scene,” Dustin interjected stubbornly.

“THANK YOU FOR THAT, THOSE ARE MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY,” El said loudly, suppressing the impulse to hug the stocky guy.

“That was SO out of character,” Lucas agreed.

“Oh, just shut up about this already. Everyone knows the problem with Harry Potter was totally the cast”, Max chimed in, “I never read the books, but it was obvious that those actors were getting too old for their roles anyway.”

The guys and El all turned to her with matching outraged expressions.

“I swear I didn’t know about this side of her when I befriended her,” Eleven said.

“What? It’s only the truth,” Max said shrugging.

“I need to forget you just said that”, Lucas said horrified, looking at Max as if she had just grown another head.

“Guys, what about going to the movies?” asked Will, desperately trying to salvage the situation.

They agreed and ended up getting tickets for an afternoon show.

Halfway through the comedy movie they had ended up watching, Mike (who had totally NOT been watching El from the corner of his eye) saw Eleven get up from her seat and leave. His heart almost jumped from his chest. This was it. The opportunity he had been looking for all afternoon.

“I’m gonna get more popcorn,” Mike said distractedly to Dustin, who was sitting next to him, as he got up.

His friend only managed a dismissive movement with his hand before exploding with laughter over something that had happened on the screen.

Mike almost tripped in his eagerness to get out of the place. He stood at the door of the room, waiting for El. He hoped he didn’t come off as a stalker.

Finally, she appeared at the end of the hall, just getting out of the bathroom. Almost as if she could sense his gaze, she lifted her head. She seemed surprised to see him.

“Mike? What are you doing here?”

READ MORE AT: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12840366/chapters/29318523

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osetljiv · 4 years

Audio

(via https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2odvuQkrlARSSv6Pvm41GM?si=sjzD66aFTGa5TkMfcIurtQ)

hi i am doing this solely for myself/my own records so please feel free to ignore!!!!!! i wanted to challenge myself by making a top 10 albums list from the last decade - it was rly difficult because my ass truly cannot cut things down and be decisive, but here it is!

i know many ppl r not into this kinda thing, but i really really love symbolic gestures - i love the idea that a new year (or a new decade!) can wipe ur slate clean, can give u a chance to be hopeful and excited and look forward to things - i hate change and i hate endings but the one good thing to come of them are beginnings! i love new starts, i love freshness, i love blank slates. i know that the end of the year/decade is arbitrary and doesn’t rly mean anything in the long run but....... it is important and super special to me!!!

i’m really not good with words/proper descriptions of the music itself, so i mainly just describe memories/associations i make to the albums, so don’t expect a proper music critic’s review or anything LOL… i am also not ranking by objective quality, but influence - these r the albums that personally made the biggest impact on me since 2010. i started off the decade age 13 and finished it in 2019 at age 23..... so clearly that is a very big difference in stages of life!!! i completed my teenage years, graduated from elementary school, high school & university.... i went thru many different friend groups, many different personality changes...... several big life events occurred…. many many hours were spent listening to music. and now i’m here!

my only rules were 1. had to be on repeat for a significant amount of time, 2. preferably only one album per artist (to force me to pick between them), and 3. i had to consistently listen to the album as a whole (as opposed to just a few songs out of it)...... some of my fav songs in the world aren’t on these albums bc they were either released before 2010 or i didn’t listen to the rest of the album except for a handful of songs (as is usually the case for me). so the albums on this list are markers in my life, and i could (and did!) listen to them front and back. and ALSO they are not ranked from 1-10...... it was literally difficult enough choosing just 10 and i truly would not survive having to rank them as well. in release date order, here they are!!!!!

owen pallett - heartland (jan 12th, 2010)

okay i know i just said i wouldn’t rank these but........... well this one is #1 regardless lol!!! the rest are not in any sort of order but this one has to be first (and how lucky that it was released first too!!!) this is the most important/special album to me in the world - it’s the first album released by my favourite musician under his real name, it has some of my most favourite songs of all time on it - it’s probably the first album in my life that i loved and listened to as a whole! when I was younger i never used to have favourite singers or favourite writers or favourite artists - i would have one favourite song/book/painting but never look into the creator’s other work, never had any interest in organizing things that way. but this is the first time i thought - “i adore this song..... and i adore all the other songs this person makes.... so i guess i like this whole album?” not to mention it’s a whole story and world - heartland tells a whole fable and sounds so beautiful doing so. owen was also the first concert i’ve ever been to! he is so beautiful and wonderful and this album is perfect and has my heart and can do no wrong! and as a plus it was released right at the beginning of 2010 so it truly started off the decade and set the pace. i really don’t know what else to say! heartland was a constant throughout the last ten years - i can’t tie it to one specific moment or feeling the way i can with the other albums. this one was really just the background of my whole adolescence, i guess, and i’ll love owen and this album forever!!!! love love love

gorillaz - plastic beach (march 3, 2010)

i honestly didn’t listen to this album as a whole until the summer after grade 11/before grade 12 when i had to take summer school for math bc i failed (first class i had ever failed :’)!!) and needed the credit for my grade 12 courses (many of which i ended up failing anyway lol) BUT i still had hope at this point so this summer wasn’t that bad..... i remember i had to buy my own bus pass for the summer w my own work money for the first time and walk to the mall bus stop every day all summer to take the city bus downtown to the highschool that used to b a prison (RIP, it got torn down this year) to take summer math from 8-3, 5 days a wk. i loved those classes surprisingly? i remember that summer i dressed so cute every day, i would wear my extra ass dresses and knee high socks and do my hair all cute...... i’d steal my mom’s old lady sweaters w mini skirts and make my own coffee to bring w me and felt so adult..... i didn’t make any friends bc i thought they were all too cool but later learned that the girls in class rly liked me and remembered me the next year when i’d see them at their highschool when visiting for a trivia tournament (don’t judge!!!!) also the first time i got hit on bc a 30 yr old man in my class somehow got my email from the teacher and sent me a creepy email asking me out and i was too scared to go to school the next day lol..... truly feels surreal. but yes i would listen to this album (and demon dayz!) on repeat cuz i found the full albums uploaded to youtube so i remember i would just listen to the entire album all the way thru for the duration of the bus ride while looking out the window and daydreaming bc i couldn’t skip any songs and I couldn’t go on my phone bc the music only plays if u keep the youtube app open…. so it’s hard to listen to the songs individually now because i just picture the transitions every time!

caribou - swim (april 20, 2010)

this was my summer between grade 8 - grade 9! up until this point i only had a handful of western artists that i listened to (before highschool i listened almost exclusively to Japanese doujin groups that remixed video game music…. do NOT judge!!!) and i felt soooo cool when i started listening to this album/others like it… had odessa downloaded on my zen creative mp3.... so freaking good!! got so embarrassed of my music taste after this LOL cuz my brother saw the album cover on my phone in highschool and asked what hipster shit i was listening to. little did he know.... its GOOD!!!! such a great album to just listen to all the way through. perfect background music for studying/ /walking/smoking/literally doing anything to! i can still listen to it and pinpoint different/new melodies in the back in certain songs. so good!!!

crystal castles - (II) (april 23, 2010)

so many 2010 albums wow but LISTEN....... i first heard crystal castles in either 2010 or 2011, immediately after i first made a tumblr in grade 9.... this was the era when offensive bloggers and hipster british bloggers were like the only 2 sections of tumblr...... one of the first ppl i followed was this one super popular british blogger, this kid from london who was probs 15 and he had like, a pale grunge aesthetic and rly long bangs that covered his eyes.... i forget his name omg i wish i could see what he was doing now! but ya i loved him i thought he was the coolest thing ever, i went on his blog and he had autoplay and pap smear was the first song that started playing...... i remember being like wtf is this??? first time i heard music like that, with the video game sounds mixed in and the vocals so distorted. i literally was enamoured like i remember thinking i should hate it and wtf r these british freaks listening to but like..... i could NOTTTT STOP and i remember i wouldn’t even bother looking up the song on youtube or anything, when i wanted to listen to the song i would just go to this guy’s tumblr LOOOOOL god!!!! on the outside i was a cutesy girly girl but on the inside i was a pale grunge hipster british tumblr user!

beach house - bloom (may 15, 2012)

this album is just the sweetest, prettiest memory…. it’s so.. crisp? and clear and pure and loving! beach house was (unsurprisingly) my spotify artist of the decade and i don’t care what rep they get or how similar their music may sound i love them with my entire heart! discovered them from tumblr (as i did most of my fav highschool albums) - first beach house song i ever heard was wild - i remember the first time i started being (SLIGHTLY) less mortified of talking about my music taste to other people, it was maybe in first year? i had gotten into my friend’s car, before we got super close, and she was playing a song off of bloom i think! and i remember my heart just stopped!!!! and i was so absolutely terrified of saying anything, but even moreso excited to see someone whose opinion i cared about who was listening to music that i liked, and so i gathered all my strength and tried to be super casual and say something like “oh, you like beach house, too?” (meanwhile i was literally shaking with nerves…..) and she just so easily said “yeah, i love this song!” and it was the most validating, comforting thing! and a while after that, one of my favourite memories: my other friend got hired at a local café/tea shop, the teeniest little place – it was like 3x4 metres, max – and she would close the store alone, and it was always completely dead, so the group of us would go and sit with her for her entire shift in this sweet warm little store – we’d have tea and coffee and scones – and over the store speakers, she would play whatever we wanted – and for a while i didn’t make suggestions, let everyone else choose, but! i worked my way up to suggesting she play bloom – and she would play the album all the way through, and she surprisingly really liked it?? and then it became the default soundtrack to our tiny hangouts in the tiny café :’)

toro y moi - anything in return (jan 16, 2013)

WOWWWW truly such a throwback....... this is the first time i felt cool, TRULY cool listening to music LMAOOOO SO EMBARRASSING!!! i remember the day it came out, grade 11 i guess??? but i swear it must have leaked way earlier cuz i remember listening to this way before.... my fav tumblr user at the time (kiki deerhoof LMFAO now THAT is a throwback!!!!) was always posting abt toro y moi and made a mixtape w his music on it and i fell in love..... and i wanted to be cool too! so i would obsessively listen to this album when it dropped. the album drop also overlapped w the moment my grades/effort in school went on a steep decline (not that it caused it ofc but this was like…. the background music to my demise, in a way!) i’ll never forget listening to so many details on my chilly walk past my old elementary school at 6am to get to my bus stop - way too cool for school

mac demarco - salad days (apr 1, 2014)

how fitting that chamber of reflection is playing in the coffee shop as i type this :’) this album was the soundtrack to my late grade 12/entire grade 13 experience. i was SO thoroughly and unbearably depressed LOOOOL it was really awful… i’m laughing now thinking back at it but honestly the feeling of being left behind by all of your friends and having to come to terms with not meeting ur own expectations of urself… having to repeat a year and being the oldest one in ur classes…… SO AWFUL!!!! really truly idk how i did it! but the whole time, all year, i would listen to this album. i would always play it on my walk to the city bus (in grade 13 i never made the actual school bus and i don’t even know how much money i must have paid taking the city bus every day bc i truly could not get out of bed early enough to take the free school bus but ALAS……) and i swear to you that entire year was grey and foggy and cold and damp… and i would play salad days (the song itself) and my emo ass would associate 100% with mac singing “oh mama, acting like my life’s already over….. oh dear, act your age and try another year,” and i swear he was singing it just for me, trying to slap me out of my stupor by saying “calm down, ur fine, ur life isn’t over, it’s just one year and you’ll be back on track!” and sometimes, SOMETIMES!! it worked!

azealia banks - broke with expensive taste (nov 7, 2014)

i know i know..... i’m aware how we feel about azealia now....... and i know how overstated it is when ppl say “she may be problematic but she was an artistic GENIUS!!!” so i will not add more to the conversation but....... is this album not pristine? like what a masterpiece????? this album straight up defined my highschool experience even tho it was released at the beginning of grade 12..... all of grade 12/13 i was blasting this album while walking down the hallway hating literally everything! i grew up idolizing my bro and all he listened to (techno/house/etc) and loving it but being too embarrassed of copying him to get too into it, but then hearing azealia sound cute and sexy and scary while interpolating all these house beats. LITERALLY chicken soup for the soul… it felt like she made it just for me!! and even before bwet actually dropped, listening to 212 and all of her other singles waiting for her to finally drop the album she was tweeting about for years, like i don’t remember the last time i anticipated an album for soooo long? and she dropped it days after my 17th bday which really was such a perfect gift. listening to this w my friend who also loved azealia, pretending we were cool as SHIT and so grown up...... beyond influential

frank ocean - blonde (aug 20, 2016)

ur lying if this album wasn’t a pivotal moment for u......... blonde is the sole reason summer 16 is viewed as a cultural landmark. i SWEAR!!!! i may have spent 8 hours a day on tumblr in 2016 but my ass was NOT cool enough to have been listening to frank ocean prior to blonde..... no i never listened to channel orange before this, yes i know i was behind the times! 2016 was the summer after my 1st year of uni, august i had just finished my summer school course so my summer was just starting (i was re-taking 1st year math bc i failed..... some things never change huh!!!! lied to my dad and told him i was tryna get ahead by taking bio in summer school... he believed me till he caught me in a lie by chatting w my friend he bumped into at walmart LOL.... and yet he never said a word :’) an angel) this was also the summer my dad left for a few months to go travelling across canada, he was gone all summer and my bro was busy working and so was my mom and i had the car all to myself for the first time. went on SOOO many drives this summer blasting this album. not to mention that since my dad wasn’t home the responsibility to drive my mom to work fell on me and wow i LOVED it? i realized i love having little responsibilities and having ppl rely on me in little ways like this..... i loved going to bed at 3am and having my mom gently wake me up at 5:30am, having a coffee with her before leaving in my ratty pajamas to drive her to work, the sun was just rising but it was already sooo hot, that summer i remember i couldn’t even hold the steering wheel cuz it was burning and my car didn’t (still doesn’t!) have AC, i’d drop her off to work up on the mountain and as i drove down the escarpment i would roll down the windows and blast pink + white right as the sun began to peek over the clouds and i would take a pretty sunrise pic every time before driving around for a bit, listening to this album, going home, and going back to sleep till 2pm

blood orange - negro swan (aug 24, 2018)

i fully expected this list to be mainly albums released earlier in the decade, which makes sense – they would’ve had more time to have an effect on me – but as the final/most recent entry on my list, this album was beautiful enough to be a consistent part of the most recent year-and-a-half of my life!!! it’s also unique in that it’s one of the only albums on this list, i think, where i had already been a big fan of the artist’s previous work and was waiting for the album to drop. not 2 sound like one of THOSE people but i often find myself liking the first albums i heard from an artist/their older music better than newer work they release (not always!!! but often!), not from any kind of elitism or anything but honestly probably just nostalgia fogging my taste? especially for my first listen of a new album – it usually takes some time and a few re-listens before i really enjoy a newer release – BUT! from the moment dev released the album cover (which is so beautiful? one of my fav album covers off the top of my head) and dropped the first 2 singles, ESPECIALLY charcoal baby, i was so so enamoured with the album, right from the start. that whole summer i had it on repeat – early the next year i saw dev play in Toronto, and it was one of the best concerts i’ve ever been to – the lighting and colours and his dancing and demeanour, the other vocalists, plus we were right up at the stage, it was so stunning!!!!! this album has consistently appeared on all of my various spotify playlists, it rly can suit all moods and occasions, i love it very much and it’s the perfect album to round out my past decade in music!

honourable mentions: SPEED ROUND

yes i’m a CHILD that cannot commit to cutting things down...... but tbh i’m surprised enough that i was able to preen my list into a top 10 anyway. so these r the honourable mentions that i couldn’t live with myself if i didn’t mention in some way!!!! all also very good and important and special to me, in no particular order!

mount kimbie - love what survives: i won’t lie this one hurt to not include on my top 10 :( i’m surprised too.... my friend rly fought for this to be included but i had to listen to my heart!!! however ofc i HAD to include it here at the very least. i was so shocked when it dropped, it was nothing like the rest of mount kimbie’s stuff i had previously heard.... i discovered them randomly when i was studying and spotify did that annoying thing where it plays “artist radio” or whatever so one of their older songs came on shuffle and WOW it was so good! and then i properly listened to them after hearing their songs with king krule... anyway this album is stunning and i am SO sad i didn’t get to see them when they came to toronto but i promise myself (and u!) that i will go the next time they come by!!!! u have my word!

foals - holy fire: this one also hurts a lot to not include :((( a LOT a lot! this one i’m really fond of, my fav foals album and one of the main albums i associate with highschool! so pretty, i’ll never forget hearing holy fire (the song itself) for the first time, so angry and satisfying and GOOD!!!

king krule - 6ft beneath the moon/the ooz: love both these albums soooo so much, i think 6fbtm came closer to almost being in the top 10 but others had it beat juuust slightly - these albums defined the beginning/end of my uni career, respectively, and i’ll cherish them forever! love archie’s ugly ginger ass with my whole heart

james blake - the colour in anything: was such a fan of james and was so excited when this album dropped - it was the start of summer i think? and i would always play it when i went for bike rides to the beach with my dad! such pretty music to drive ur bike to beside the water, all the way down the waterfront until we got to the next city over, riding past all the rich ppl’s mansions and trying to sneak a glance into their windows as we rode by

beyonce - self-titled: obviously the day this dropped - w no promo whatsoever - was a critical moment in music history!! we played this obsessively in high school, blasted this album the entire Europe trip in grade 12 and it just reminds me of travelling and planes and France…. so sexy!

solange - a seat at the table: rly truly a gorgeous album!! we played this in the car when my friends and i trekked to Toronto early one fall morning right after it dropped, we skipped school to go to some event at a café, and we had to wake up DUMB early, like 4:30AM, and i went to go pick them up and we were all way too tired to talk to eachother and stressed cuz we absolutely COULDN’T miss the train so i played this album the whole drive there while the sun was rising and it was so calming and pretty and special

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kondo-hijikata · 7 years

Text

30 Questions Tag 😅

i gots tagged by @mr-fujita <3 tagging @anreg, @mysteriouslysaltytragedy, @animaniacal, @snufflesblacks, @haganehimura, @thebeshimifangirl and anyone else who would like to :3

1- How tall are you? A: 5′10/182~ish cm

2- What color and style is your hair? A: brown and LONG LONG LONG, i’m letting it grow to my frickin feet yall idgaf lol (this is moi btw)

3- What color are your eyes? A: green

4- Do you wear glasses? A: ya im blind af lol but i look bad in them so i walk around not seeing anything in public. #vain

5- Do you wear braces? A: nope

6- What is your clothing style? A: mostly i wear geek shirts and jeans lol but i do have some nicer things

7- Any freckles/mole/beauty marks? A: i guess

8- Where were you born? A: us

9- Where do you live? A: us

10- Do you have any siblings? A: ya

11- Do you go to school? A: currently no

12- What kind of student are you? A: the kind that will master material that’s relevant but won’t do things that waste time. (i skipped a final project once because it was bullshit and ended up with a high b in the class. good tradeoff tbh)

13- What are your favourite TV shows? A: st//ar tr//ek and r//k

14- Favorite pass time? A: this blue hell website lol

15- What is your dream job? A: i just wanna write tbh

16- Opinion on marriage? A: up to the individual, and not as necessary as society deems it. aka do whatever tf makes u happy

17- Would you want to have kids one day? A: no. NEVER. NEVER. i am extremely anti-procreation. i don’t want kids. i don’t like them. however, i respect others’ choices to have them. i just wish they would respect mine to not. the reason why i feel so strongly about this topic is because i’ve been asked too many times when i’m having them, why i’m not, and then had to sit through being shamed for living my life. not cool, my guys.

18- Girly girl or Tomboy? A: both. i love all women!!!!

19- Do you like shopping? A: no. i hate it tbh lol

20- What countries have you visited? A: i traveled back and forth to japan a lot and then lived there. i also visited canada (loved it)

21- What is the scariest dream you ever had? A: getting stuck with a baby

22- Do you have enemies? A: idk, idc

23- Do you have a significant other? A: yea

24- If not do you want one? A:

25- Are you open about your feelings? A: i’m empathetic so if i get the feeling someone wants to hear what i really have to say, i’ll say it. if not, i’ll keep my opinions to myself.

26- What’s your family like? A: let’s not do this

27- Would you date someone your parents didn’t approve of? A: absolutely and i have. and life was hard but oh well.

28- Favourite colour? A: green

29- Any pet peeves? A: let’s not do this either lol

30- Do you believe in astrology?

A: no

#just miburo things

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rinnnyxr · 3 years

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I've dressed up as a unicorn before. I prefer pretty costumes to scary costumes. I prefer to put together costumes on my own rather than buy them. I'm subscribed to a lot of youtube channels. I can relate to a lot of the books I read. I paint my nails orange in the fall. I didn't use to like mustard yellow, but now I do. Brown is a color that looks good on me. I think for myself. My middle name is common. My first name is common or fairly common. I want to give my kids unique names. I want to give my kids common names. I make up my own names. I have a lot going on in my life right now. ...and sometimes it seems like it's more than I can handle. I've had an anxiety attack. I've had a real physical problem that the doctor dismissed as anxiety. I own epi pens. I carry my epi pen with me everywhere. I've had to use an epi pen before. I've been to the ER when having an allergic reaction before. I've been tested to see what I'm allergic to. I've done something against the rules and was afraid of getting caught. I don't believe that breaking the rules is always a bad thing. I know that sometimes breaking the rules is necessary. My favorite Disney princess is Belle. I decorate for holidays. I wish I had more money to spend on decorations. I live in a small apartment. My favorite party game is Truth or Dare. I haven't been to a party in a LONG time. My friends from high school and I don't talk much anymore. I haven't seen my first crush in years. I saw someone I used to have feelings for and didn't feel a thing. I enjoy arts and crafts shows. Shoe sizes make me mad sometimes. My full-length mirror has a colored rim. I buy calendars from the dollar store. I buy my own groceries. I've had my free will stolen from me. I've had a teacher bully me. My dresser is an antique. I have antique bedroom furniture. I don't have any tattoos. I enjoy watching vlogs. I'm part of a lot of groups on facebook. I consider myself a natural leader. I have fake plants. I own a succulent. The best type of frosting is chocolate. Sometimes I eat dessert for breakfast. I have a sweet tooth. Sometimes I crave cheese. Sometimes I crave chocolate. I take vitamins. I take medication. I know how to do a fishtail braid. I've worn a fishtail braid before. All of my needs aren't met. I'm a good listener. I'm a good friend.

You're always behind on everything. ....and you wish you could catch up. You don't know how to handle your life. You made a stupid mistake/decision four years ago. You eat popsicles regularly. You dream of having a white Christmas tree one day. Your nails are painted sparkly red. You've been discriminated against blatantly. You're more bohemian than girly. You have two favorite sweaters this year. ...and one is teal; one is coral. You like the colors teal and coral. On most days, you don't make your bed. You're cluttered and disorganized. Your mind skips too much from one thing to the next. You have too much energy sometimes. Sometimes you forget to take your medicine. ...or forget if you've taken it or not. You take vitamins. You use a sunlamp. You don't have a winter coat that fits you this year. You own a camera tripod. You are not happy with the social class you are in. You are lonely and want someone to talk to right now. You haven't been to church much at all this year. You miss the days when you were happy. There's someone you would be really angry at and jealous of if you thought about what he/she did to you. You love someone who wants nothing to do with you. It amazes you what some people are willing to share on the Internet. You've been accused of many things you haven't done. You are feeling down right now. You write in cursive more than in print. You have been told you have perfect handwriting. Sometimes, you wish you were less right-brained. You don't know how to handle your life. You don't know how to handle who you are. ...or your responsibilities. You worry too much about disappointing people. You care too much what mean-spirited people think of you. Your situation seems hopeless. You always forget to burn candles, even though you have them. You don't need to be rich, just financially stable enough to be happy. You want to talk to someone, but you know nobody cares about you. You like Christmas cards with glitter on them. You wish you had a car. You don't have any sisters. You wish you had a sister. You wish you had more money to spend on make-up. You've never rented a movie on your own. You've never had detention. You think yoga is boring. You've farted in a dance or yoga or exercise class. You've found out someone you looked up to was actually a terrible person. Stereotypes in real life are similar but different to those portrayed on TV You know someone rich and ugly, and you know someone poor and pretty. You like both unique baby names and popular baby names. You know what you want to name your kids. You are not happy with your life. You wish someone cared about you, but they don't. You've made some really bad decisions. ..that you wish you could take back. You have huge regrets. You've made huge mistakes. You haven't had parents to teach you what's right. ...because they taught you wrong, and u had to unlearn what they taught you You are wearing Christmas pajamas right now. You like long shirts better than crop tops. You love jeggings and think they're super comfy. You would never have guessed that jeggings would be so popular. Your stomach seems to always be hurting. You use "smh" a lot on social media. You probably spend too much time on social media. You want your life back. You aren't happy. Your neighbor is loud. You missed a doctor's appointment and need to re-schedule. Your life is too demanding. You're tired.

You used to be sheltered, but now you're not. You think it's cool to step out of your comfort zone and try new things. You own a lot more shirt than you do pants and shorts. You can think of a "Christian" who seems very fake, shallow, & superficial. You can think of a "Christian" who seems very materialistic. You think it's cool to be authentic & true to who you are. You can be graceful sometimes and socially awkward at other times. You've had a rumor spread about you that was totally false. You've held back because you didn't want to offend anyone. You're guilty of hiding who you are in order to try to please everyone else You've been abused. You know many people who are selfish, entitled, spoiled, stuck-up, etc. You'd commit suicide if u didn't have loving& supportive family & friends. You think for yourself. You've been rejected by the popular group. You've never been sheltered. You have acne, but foundation covers it up well. You've never used bronzer or highlighter. You don't have a smartphone and wish you did. You used to want to be a model when you were younger. You honestly think you look like a model. Your feet are an awkward size. Your dad is a jerk and you wish you never had to see him again. Everyone that was supposed to love you left you. You love your mom, but she isn't mentally stable. You wanted to get to know someone who has no interest in you. It takes you a long time to recover after a breakup (including friend ones)

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