#fuck off mental gnome

[shadowdianne]

I'd probably be less stressed if I stopped my very much NOT funny tradition of having a bazillion things happening 'round me at the end of the year

#still waiting to see if my doctor is going to approve my blood work #still on talks with my bank to see if the plan gets approved and I actually get to own a place #still waiting for the agency to call us back about the place we saw tuesday and we'd be interested in #I also am going to be a... dunno the nongendered form of how I'm going to have a niece in less than a week #i'm working my ass off so i don't get sacked at the beginning of the year #planning a move + how it's going to work #how we are going to be asking for days off on both of our jobs considering it all #the conversation regarding companies pertaining light #water and all of the basic necesseties #which revolves around on the fact that I need to feign being a woman for all of them and keep accepting and signing forms under a gender i' #very much not bc here i don't get to be legally recognized as anything but the binary #and the mental inner countdown all of it brings bc since taking t i'm gearing towards a more androgynous look and therefore more difficult #to pass with each passing week #i REALLY want a break #and to probably pass out for a month #(and knowing that atop of it all i'm starting to burn out and I'm not being as good of a friend I should be) #fuck off mental gnome #ps to those that might be reading the tags #me trying to own a place is mostly due to a need since mortages are cheaper than anything these days and our lease is going to be up in a #year #and we know they will not keep the monthly payment the same if we keep leaving here giving that they've increased the amount twice already #so we need to move and we need to do it now whilst i'm still under 30 #as banks offer aid to those that try to own a place under 30 and they look to the oldest of the couple #which would be me #I'm 28 #soon to be 29 in -also- less than a week #can i have a fucking break xd #living and not leaving #not editing a single tag we die like fanfic authors who don't give a damn

[astirysk2electricboogaloo]

I got the majority of this information from the YouTuber Annamarie Forcino's video "The Alarming "Gnome Hunting" Trend No One's Talking About". (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pf0bZOMuVFs)

This post is to help spread this information.

Please be aware:

• If you come across anything with the term "gnome hunting" or anything listed below online, block and report the account immediately. If you come across it offline, covertly and safely get the absolute fuck out of there. Warn others.

• Keep yourself safe. As with any bullshit like this these people may be violent. The wearing of tactical gear and the use of the word hunting when talking about a group of human beings is not peaceful or respectful of life. Exercise caution. Especially if you are in a group the groups they're in target.

• This is mostly on TikTok, DO NOT SEARCH FOR IT ON SITES WITH THE ALGORITHM. This will drive engagement and help it spread. If you come across it block and report it but do not search it.

The term "gnome hunting" is being used by antisemitists/neonazis/white supremacists to refer to themselves, they themselves being the "hunters" and those they target, Jews, being the "gnomes" and is a way for them to talk in code.

Things to watch out for with this specific wave of antisemitic bullshit are but are not limited to:

"join the hunt" = join us.

"millions wear the hats" millions = the Jews, hats = the Jewish Yarmulke/Kippah (a Jewish head covering). This phrase refers to Jewish people in general. When they use this phrase they are talking about Jews.

"kike" a slur against those of Jewish descent and or those who are practicing Judaism.

"88" H is the 8th letter of the alphabet. 88 = hh = "hail hitler".

"⚡⚡" "ᛋᛋ" "ϟϟ" Two lightning bolt emojis, two Greek letter ᛋ's, or two lighting bolt symbols side by side = the nazi ss. The nazi ss flag is two lighting bolt symbols side by side.

"Z" or "z" The English letter Z/z is used by russian nazis against Ukrainians who are being murdered by and suffering war crimes at the hands of russian nazis since the current russian dictator putin invaded Ukraine. Has unfortunately spread and is being used by nazis in other countries. The symbol has similarities to the wolfsangel.

"Ƶ" The wolfsangel. An ancient runic symbol believed to have been capable of warding off wolves, appropriated by nazi organizations in nazi Germany. Still used by white supremacists/nazis today.

(Cannot find a symbol for this.) The sunwheel, sonnenrad, or black sun. A symbol from old Norse and old Celtic culture. Also appropriated by nazis, still used by neonazis today.

"schizopost" "schizoposting" Used by neonazis when they use neurodivergence/mental illness (they do not struggle with) as an excuse for their bullshit. Ex: saying "I'm insane" "I'm schizophrenic" "me and the boys being schizophrenic" in the same post about "gnome hunting" or with any relation to nazi/white supremacists ideology.

#antisemitists #antisemitism #nazi mentioned #white supremacists #Cw nazism #tw nazism #tw white supremacy #Cw white supremacy #tw antisemitism #cw antisemitism #Jewish #Judaism #gnome hunting

[yourplayersaidwhat]

All of these were said in today’s pathfinder session.

•

Kineticist (OOC): “To be fair, I don’t think she cares about innocence.”

Barbarian (OOC): “Wow, thanks for the brilliant insight into the mind of our token evil teammate.”

•

DM: “What are we doing?”

Barbarian (OOC): “Arguing over the probability that you can fuck the other horny people in horny jail, keep up.”

•

Gnome Bard, to Summoner (OOC): “I like that your dice are either really big or really small.”

Barbarian (OOC): “Oh, so you’re into size difference, eh?”

•

Barbarian (OOC): “Welp, I physically can’t damage this guy. Anyone up for a game of War?”

•

Vishkanya Bard: “We’re going into the closet.”

Gnome Bard (OOC): “Yay, we’re gay!”

•

Vishkanya Bard (OOC): “It’s the rage song!”

*Rainbow Connection starts playing*

•

Gnome Bard: “Food?”

DM: “It’s decayed.”

Gnome Bard: “How decayed?”

DM: “It’s decayed.”

Gnome Bard: “But, like, a little bit, or?”

DM: “De. Cayed.”

•

Vishkanya Bard: “PERCEIVE.”

•

Barbarian: “Listen, if you want to get your token evil teammate to do something even mildly morally neutral, you’ve gotta make it selfish.”

•

DM: “He’s a demon of sadistic torture, cruelty, and bloody murder.”

Barbarian, to Summoner (OOC): “Sounds like your kinda guy.”

•

Gnome Bard: “I pee off the ledge.”

The entire rest of the party + DM: “WHY????”

•

Vishkanya Bard: “PERCEIVE! 9!”

DM: “COTS!”

Vishkanya Bard: “FUCK!”

•

DM, to Summoner: “She worships him, right?”

Summoner: “No, he worships her.”

Barbarian: “Simp.”

•

Barbarian: “Ropes or… ropes.”

DM: “They’re ROBES.”

•

*book gives V-Bard damage and forces her to drop it*

V-Bard: “Hey Summoner, come look at this book!”

•

DM: “That’s human blood.”

Kineticist: “Oh. Lovely.”

G-Bard: “Can I lick it?”

•

Barbarian, sarcastic: “Well this guy seems… mentally healthy.”

DM, sarcastic: “He seems totally over the death of his brother.”

Summoner, chaotic evil and entirely sincere: “I like him. We could be friends.”

Barbarian: “We know.”

•

G-Bard, in a voice: “The pit of despair!”

Barbarian (OOC): “… Was that Elmo?”

•

Barbarian, panicked: “MMM. This is so normal I like this so much.”

•

DM: “The child’s dead.”

The entire party: “WHOOOOO!”

•

Kineticist, to DM (OOC): “What does it do?”

Barbarian (OOC): “It sits there and bes* full of eyeballs.”

*pronounced beez, as in the word be in the same tense as sits

•

Literally any time anyone made a sex joke:

“Roll for horny jail.”

This does nothing mechanically except make us laugh.

#shit my players say #submission #pathfinder #shareable #unconventional food choices #sfw roll: nat 1

[suugarbabe]

Hi, I hope you’re doing fine❤️ I love your fics! If it’s not a problem i would like to please request Theo Nott + soulmate trope where before the soulmates meet they sometimes throughout the day feel each other’s sensations (I don’t mean feeling, mostly just things like touch, pain, smell, taste) and Theo is kind of an annoying soulmate for the reader because he drinks black coffee all the time and the reader hates it and also he has all these quidditch practices and fights so she often wakes up with bruises and all that? But it’s all lighthearted and fluffy if it’s not a problem haha. Thanks ❤️

soulmate tropes are honestly one of my favorite because you can do so much with it, it's always a fun time.

You slouched in your seat next to Luna at breakfast as the sudden taste of straight black and bitter coffee consumed your senses. You nearly gagged, causing Luna's face to turn to one of soft concern.

"Black coffee again?" You nodded, "Yeah, and ribs are fucking killing me, I woke up with a huge purple bruise on the back of them and my jaw is sore. I swear to Merlin, whoever my soulmate is is about to get a howler from me because this is just ridiculous."

"Blaise and I think we know who it is if you'd like me to share it with you." Luna said it like she asked if you wanted to know who was on the cover of the Quibbler this month. Her ability to discuss anything like it was just normalcy and average never ceased to amaze you.

You stared at her and she just stared back, small smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes. "Yes, Luna. Please tell me because I need to confront him."

Luna took a bite of her blueberry muffin, "Did you know that the reason why some blueberries are sweet and some are sour is because gnomes actually-"

"Luna!"

"Oh, yes, right. It's Theodore Nott." She says it like it's obvious. Like you should have know this whole time. But now that you think about it, it makes perfect sense. The bruises, the soreness, the smell of broomstick wax that will assault your nose.

You looked toward the Slytherin table in search for sandy brown curls. "He already left for class," Luna's voice cut in to your inner thoughts. "Erm, right, thanks Luna. I'll see you at lunch?" She nodded, "The four of us can sit together. Have a good talk with Theodore."

You thanked her, setting off down the hall toward your first class. Your plan was to search for Theo during your free period, but as fate would have it, you spotted him down the corridor.

You pushed through the crowded hall until you had to practically crane your neck to look up at the man in front of you. You reached out, boldly grabbing his arm, "Theo, we need to talk."

He looked down, slight confusion on his face. "Go on, bruv. I'll see you in class," Blaise gave you a subtle wink before walking off.

You pulled Theo to the side, giving the illusion to yourself that you had some privacy. "Been smelling vanilla lately, Theo?" you crossed your arms as you leaned back against the corridor wall.

Theo quirked an eyebrow, "How did you now that?"

You sighed, "Because that's the scent of my shampoo." Theo placed a hand on the wall behind you, the other gently cupping your face as he leaned down, gently pressing his nose to the crown on your head.

"So what you're suggesting then is-"

"We're soulmates," you cut him off, "and I am seriously angry with you."

Theo scoffed, the hand that once cupped your face now placed on his own hip, "Why? What did I do?"

You lifted your school shirt high enough for Theo to see the deep purple bruise on your ribs. He quickly grabbed your hand, forcing your shirt back down and scanning the hall, making sure no one else was looking.

"Are you mental?" The slight protectiveness in Theo's tone made your stomach flutter. "Are you mental? What happened to you? Get in another fight? Because we're going to have a problem."

Theo chuckled softly, "Well the one you should have a problem with is Bole because he's the one who hit me with the bludger at practice yesterday."

You frowned, "I'll fight the git, where is he?"

Theo couldn't contain the look on his face, "Calm down, anima gemella, we can't both be fighters."

You looked up at his big blue eyes, "Oh, darling. You have no idea what you're in for."

#theo nott fic #nonny bo bonny #theo nott request #theo nott x you #theo nott x reader #theo nott x y/n #theo nott soulmate

[blue-sadie]

Fuck Him Out

Aonung x Nerd Reader

Series Masterlist

Prt 5 of the Fucking The Nerd Series

Summary: taking up your brothers offer leads you to be in the arms of your childhood best friend.

Warning: breast slapping, aged up characters Car

Yn/3rd person pov

"Hey I'm in the parking lot where are you" I murmured into my phone "I had a meeting come up but there is a surprise" he giggled like a girl before hanging up.

"Son of a bitch" I cussed stuffing my phone onto my pocket "now the yn I remember does not swear" I jumped turning to the voice and my mouth dropped "aonung" I screamed jumping into his arms.

His arms held me tightly as he swung me around "dam I've missed you so much" he chuckled and set me down.

"I've missed you too" I smiled "so what have you been up to" I asked grabbing my luggage as he lead me to the car.

"Not much really mostly just school and such, but what about you" he said and stopped at his car my mouth hung open "no way you still have this thing" I squealed.

It was his dad's old car and when we were younger he used to take us for icecream and make us listen to his cringy music.

"Yea he gave it to me for my 18th" he grinned grabbing my bag and shoving it into the trunck "come on I'll take you home" he whispered as he passed me and opened the door for me.

"Thank you" I smiled hopping and buckling up "now what have you been up to" he grinned getting in as well "you been seeing someone" he teased.

I looked away from him I was to soon to tell him about the whole situation "no but school as well you know how my mom is" I said and we justed started chatting back and forth.

After 20 minutes we arrived at our house his being next to my brother's and parked in his driveway "hey my mom kinda heard you were back and invited you to dinner" he nervously smiled and rubbed the back of his head.

"Sure of course just need to check in with the old man" I smiled getting out and he did the same "catch ya later" I waved walking over to my brother's house and took out my phone as I got to the door.

"Hey where's the key" I texted and got a quick reply 'in our favorite spot' he replied with a laughing emoji I sighed.

I had to drag one of his small benches he had on the porch over to a specific corner which had a little gnome which was hollow, he said it our favorite spot because he would always hide my small things inside and I could never reach it.

"Haha very funny" I muttered sarcastically and took out the key and went to unlock the door, as I entered the house I marveled at it it was the exact same.

"You never liked the change" I murmured to myself looking at all the different photos and trinkets that lined the wall as I slowly made my way up to my childhood room.

I plopped myself and my bag down on the bed and took out my phone staring at the empty notifications normally by now I would at least have one text from lo'ak but nothing.

I bit my lip he isn't worth it if he believes her more then me it's his loose, I muted his contact this holiday I can just breath.

"Hey bro can I go over to aonungs tonight" I typed and sent it and I put my phone down to quickly go shower and get dressed.

The shower was brisk but dam did it help my sore shoulders, I dried myself probably when I got out and picked a simple outfit.

When I walked back into the room I glanced out the window as something caught my attention my eyes widened as I stared straight into aonungs room and he was shirtless.

I bit my lip harshly fuck he got hot I continued to stare as he picked out a shirt it was only when a ding echoed through the room i looked away I grabbed my phone.

"Yea just be sure to use protection" I huffed, he and a few of my other family members shipped me and aonung together since we were like 7.

I sent him a quick middle finger before grabbing some of my things to go over "phone, jacket" i checked off my mental list and headed out over to aonungs.

"Hey ronal" i smiled as she opened the door and pulled me into her arms "i missed you so much" she murmured as she pulled back and welcomed me inside "I've made your favorite" she sung sweetly as she lead me to the lounge.

"hey tonowari how are you" i murmured sitting on one of the couches "im doing well thank you for asking no-" he was interrupted by tsireya's squealing as she tackled me onto the couch.

"Yn" she yelled squeezing me tightly "your suffocating me" i coughed playfully and panted heavily when she let go "so dramatic" she laughed sitting beside me.

"hey yn" aonung smiled as he walked down the stairs "hey why don't we settle at the dinning room table while i bring the food out" ronal ushered all of us into the dinning room.

"Ma'lady" aonung murmured as he pushed my chair in and sat beside me, i started catching up with the rest of the family as we ate "oh my gosh i remember that" i laughed when me and aonung started bringing up past memories.

"Ok i can you see two wanna catch up more so you guys can go up stairs" tonowari smiled and gestured up stairs "come on yn" aonung pulled me from the seat and up the stairs to his room.

"Dam i forgot how cool your room was" i whispered and flopped onto his bed and watched as he closed the door "so your gonna tell me whats bothering you" he growled and sat beside me.

"nothing is the matter" i huffed rolling my eyes "yes there is now tell me" he said and pulled me up into his arms "what is troubling you" he asked i sighed heavily "i lied when i said there was no man" i whispered.

"Then why aren't you spending the holiday with him" he murmured softly rubbing his hands up and down my arms in a comforting manner "he... kinda ended things with me" I whispered my voice cracking slightly.

Aonung listened carefully as I told him about the situation "he doesn't deserve you if he listened to that bitch, you hadn't even talked to her yet" he hissed.

He started whispering comforting words as we sat up against the headboard my head leaning on his chest "I thought he changed" I sniffled.

"Sometimes people can't or just don't want to" he tried to reason but deep down aonung wanted to kill lo'ak for making his best friend cry.

I pulled away and turned to him "what happens if I never find someone" I cried he smiled sadly at me "their are plenty of fish in the sea yn" he murmured.

It got quiet between us as we just stared into each other's eyes I could feel my feelings for aonung resurfacing he was always there for me when other's weren't.

"C-can I kiss you" I blurted out glancing between his lips and eyes he nodded eagerly and brought his hands to my cheeks as our lips touched.

"I wanted this for so long" he murmured against my lips, he slowly moved on top of me as we moved to lay down.

He moved his lips to my neck "fuck aonung" I whined as I ran my hands through his hair, he groaned into my skin as he grinded his body into me.

I pulled his hair to bring his lips back to mine "dam yn" he growled and started to let his hands wonder as ours lips molded together.

"Can I take these off" he asked pulling back "only if I can take yours off as well" I bite my lip, he groaned out before we started pulling off eachothers clothes our has grazing eachothers skin.

"Fuck your better then I imagined" he smirked and pulled me into another kiss and moved us so I was on top.

"I want you to ride me" he growled as his hands gripped my ass, we both moaned as I sunk back onto his cock and slowly started to bounce on his dick.

"Fuck you tits" he muttered and moved his hands to squeeze my breasts I bit my lip trying to suppress my moans what happens if tsireya walks in or worse ronal.

Aonung slapped my breasts bringing me out my daze "don't you fucking dare suppress those beautiful moans" he growled before starting to thrust up against me.

I put my hands on his chest to support myself so I could bounce faster fuck his cock felt so good, my moans fultered for a moment as I felt a knot to form in my stomach.

"Fuck baby are you gonna cum" he groaned and moved one of his hands from my breasts to my clit only increasing the pleasure "a-aonung" I moaned as my breathe became uneven and my body started to shudder.

"S-shit" I cried as I clenched around as I cam making him cum as well, I collapsed onto his chest and smiled as he wrapped his arms around me.

"You deserve everything the world has to offer"

Tag.List

@avatar4eva @lik0 @greekgods15 @sweetirilly

#avatar #avatar pandora #avatar x reader #avatar way of water #avatar x reader smut #avatar smut #avatar fanfic #avatar fanfic series #aonung #aonung smut #aonung x reader #aonung x reader smut

[unexpectedbrickattack]

Now hold on a gosh-diddly-darn minute, I noticed the entire time talking about a tipsy Peppino no one thought to ask this but what about tipsy GUS? I mean we saw him a li'l tipsy in the fastfood saloon escape, can I hear your thoughts about that/him please? Have they ever gotten tipsy together?

(I just like the mental image of the two alone, just being real giggly with each other (Gus just says "hey" and Peppi starts giggling which sets Gus off giggling) and being sappy goofs with each other <3)

HEEHEE u are so right and i am so sorry for withholding this information from the masses 😭

My homebrew for gnomes is that they are simultaneously hardy folk (able to eat virtually anything and immune to most poisonous creatures) AND extremely intolerant of alcohol. Theres no reason for that, i just like it alot :)

So Gus would be an extreme lightweight 😭 its SO bad; he cant speak clearly at all, he cant walk straight, he has the Worst hangovers and he wont remember anything from the previous night. The line between ‘pleasantly buzzed’ and ‘blackout drunk’ is so thin that Gus doesnt even try social drinking. If he MUST drink, it will be in the comfort of his own barebones apartment 😭 at least, until Peppino started hanging out with vigilante and his crew.

Gustavo LIKES drinking! Its just hard to find a good balance, and THATS bc he simply doesnt know how alcohol works. Peppino is like:

“Look ‘ere. All of these have a number somewhere on the bottle. Or a percentage. Lower the number, the better it is for you.”

Gustavo is like !!! Oh!!! That is very helpful! What would you recommend for me then?

“Probably…2-5%. 5-10 proof. Small 'a numbers.”

Gustavo nods, interested. He points at a bottle he recognizes from the last time he came here and got shitfaced. “That one up there; do you know how ‘a strong that one is? Or should i ask the bartender?”

Peppino squints at the company label. “45%.”

“Oh!” That makes sense. “Well what do you usually drink?”

“70%.”

“Oh!”

Peppino recommends some of the LIGHT light wines, the ones that barely have a hint of anything. Theyre sweet (which Gustavo loves so very very much) and for the first time in a very long time, he Stays buzzed instead of immediately faceplanting into being blackout drunk.

Hes very. Playful. Is what Peppino would describe a tipsy Gustavo. He hesitates to use the term ‘flirty’ because that is not whats happening. But hes like. Clearly entertaining some gruff looking men like five times his size as they ramble drunkenly about random shit like ‘waow….thasso cool…and then what happened???’

Its funny at first bc Gustavo is so fucking TINY that all you can see of him, in the group of men as they yapyapyap about some inane shit that Gustavo wont even remember, is his tiny little tail 😭 It is less funny, however, when Peppino catches himself rambling about work and Gustavo is like (ears perked; tail swaying) ‘mmhmm. wrow…thats ‘a kinda nice…what else did you do??’ Peppino is like *buffering* (‘something is happening right now that will need to be addressed at a later time. Do not forget DO NOT FORGET. URGENT!!!!’)

Otherwise Gustavo is just a silly guy. Vigilante will make a joke and he laughs so low and deep that he sounds downright villainous 😭 Peppino will point out something stupid on the TV and like hours later Gus is like ‘…heeeuehuuueee…..do u remember [insert stupid reference] and Peppino will giggle. Peppinos affinity for throwing around ilus are met with Gustavo going ‘😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊’ with absolutely no way to even pretend to mask it.

Gustavo has fun being out in the saloon but he really enjoys drinking in Peppinos house. Its not nearly as loud as the saloon and theres usually homecooked foods like breads and soups (Because Peppino stress-cooks ALL the time). Brick gets to stay indoors instead of waiting outside the saloon, so Gustavo gets to mess with his soft fur contentedly. He just gets to be cozy; its quite nice 😊

#answered #chattin #/// #//// #///// #gustavo #peppino #pepstavo #alcohol #drinking #i still have to answer that anon asking about pepstavo hcs so i hope this helps a little fhjdbdjdndkd #additional context is that; gnomes stay mostly in the forest. so theres not alot of outsider influence #gustavos a bit of a traveller; he likes exploring and seeing whats outside the forest. and he usually comes back with goodies #alcohol is just one of those things he tried during a trip or two and it always fucked him up #never looked into it; some shit is best left alone lmao #unrelated to that #but the alt though that peppino had; i was going to say (something el gee bee tee is happening…) #which made me laugh but i cant make him say stuff like that fhdjbdjdjdjd #also note that Gustavo does not drink often at all; he will accompany peppino to the saloon and let him get tipsy w his friends #he will entertain their silly shenanigans and bring Peppino home when theyre done #and if hes hanging out at peppinos house he will lounge around listening to peppino blabber about nothing #and drink some ciders :) #he only drinks like. 10% of the time. hes a social drinker but ONLY when he feels like it #and ONLY if peppino is with him #ALSO ALSO #IMPORTANT #you must know that Gustavo is NEVER sitting while in the saloon #he is standing on his barstool w his hands on the countertop

[the-incident-on-show-day]

the ark’s d&d nights

(hcs i wrote during a power outage because i had nothing else to do)

rowan - the DM!! he loves writing and planning elaborate campaigns, as well as being in control. because of this he struggles with railroading (for non-d&d players, that basically means forcing your players to make choices/follow paths they don’t want to) and often fights with lister, who makes it his mission to derail the story as much as possible. when he has to play as a character, he’ll be a bard or a wizard.

bliss - loves making chaotic hot people. loves flirting with chaotic hot people. you’d think it would be awkward, considering her ex is the DM- it isn’t. quick to jump to violence (or provoke others to it). basically tries to get in as many badass oneliners in every sentence as she can, and somehow it works. probably mains genasis or smth... either as a rogue or a magic user.

juliet - she’s introduced as a sweet, unassuming elven girl... everyone assumes she’s just playing herself. but as soon as she goes into combat, she RAGES and it turns out she was a barbarian all along- the most brutal warrior you could ever imagine. different voice and everything. turns out she’s using D&D as an outlet for her suppressed childhood rage. everyone is terrified, impressed, and lister begs to put her on a screamo album.

lister - he makes a joke character- definitely named something like jack inoff. definitely a gnome bard. does the funny voice, flirts with everyone, blah blah blah. ruins a bunch of serious moments because he’s scared of vulnerability. but when his backstory comes up, it ends up being the most tragic fucking thing possible and breaks the hearts of everyone at the table. by the end, he’s the most invested out of all of them… and definitely cries when his first character dies.

jimmy - a paladin. with a knife. he’s a little shy about roleplaying at first (beginnings of sessions are always a struggle) and sticks to peppering in funny comments every now and then. but once he gets into it, he gets INTO IT. he genuinely forgets he’s playing a character sometimes. and lister can’t take his eyes off of him.

angel - joins on call, used to just listen in until rowan suggests that she plays as jimmy’s patron. she’s the most chaotic out of all of them and rarely gives anyone what they request- but she’s so funny about it that no one can find it in themselves to be mad.

(oh and they definitely make an album abt this. ppl theorize endlessly like “what does it mean when they say ‘i just wanna quench the flames / but i’m already ablaze??’ a metaphor for mental health?? for self-destructive tendencies??”)

(and instead it’s abt lister’s dumb ass who keeps casting firebolt in enclosed spaces.)

#iwbft #i was born for this #the ark #lister bird #rowan omondi #jimmy kaga ricci #juliet schwartz #angel rahimi #bliss lai #hcs #iwbft hcs

[yay855]

Honestly I do like how Warcraft initially had Orcs be generic evil monsters, only to turn around and say they were victims of the literal demons causing these wars just as much if not more so than the humans, Dwarves, and Elves... and then the humans, dwarves, and elves turned around and literally enslaved the orcs long enough for their demonic taint to fully fade, by which point nearly all of the Orcs had lost all sense of cultural identity and no longer had a homeland to return to. So they managed to free themselves and fucked off across the ocean to another continent entirely, settling down in a literal desert and finding out that there were several other races the humans didn’t care for or just didn’t bother helping, the Trolls were considered nothing but monsters and the Tauren were nearly going extinct thanks to Centaur aggression, so the Orcs, still reeling from their loss of identity and all but the oldest among them having been born slaves, chose to help these people. The Darkspear Trolls were welcomed into the Barrens with open arms and the Tauren given military and material aid against the Centaurs- and then a group of undead managed to break free of the Lich King’s clutches and regain their mental freedom and senses of identity, and the Horde welcomed them in too! Maybe not with love, the Forsaken are a pretty gloomy people who use biological warfare with gusto, but still allies.

The Orcs did fight with the Night Elves from time to time, but that’s because the Orcs lived in a freaking desert and a savannah and desperately needed wood to build homes and light fires for cooking and such, and the Night Elves chose to go to war over their forests being cut down instead of, say, help the Orcs learn about druidic magic and teach them how to upgrade their new home’s environment so they don’t have to intrude upon Night Elf territory.

And basically every conflict between the Alliance and Horde since then has been caused by the humans and their allies refusing to let bygones be bygones and accept that the Orcs were betrayed and forcibly turned into monsters but have since healed and only seek stability now.

...and then Blizzard turns Garrosh Hellscream, son of the man who freed the Orcs from their demonic enslavement, into a bloodthirsty villain who waged war for the sake of waging war and who accidentally murdered the leader of the Tauren.

Then they made Vol’jin, the wise and compassionate leader of the Darkspear Trolls and personal friend to Thrall, leader for literally a single expansion before killing him off in an opening cutscene.

And then they turned Sylvanas, a former High Elf turned banshee turned queen of the Forsaken and an extreme pragmatist seeking only to protect her new people from those who see them as nothing but unnatural monsters, into the villain by having her become the new warchief of the Horde, and then blame her for things her new political opponent did with glee but now speaks out against as if it was all her fault, as well as meaningless babble about honor from a man with none. Now she’s fucked off to who knows where, abandoning her post and the people she fought so hard to protect.

I just... the Horde’s story was one of persecuted minorities banding together for mutual protection and support against human aggression, but they’re still treated like the aggressors and the villains in every expansion, and their iconic characters are all killed off with no (good) new ones introduced in turn. Meanwhile the Alliance’s golden boy Anduin Wrynn went from a spoiled brat of a prince to a grown man and genuine leader, the three Dwarven clans have made efforts to reunify under one banner while the former King Bronzebeard has become an avatar of Azeroth itself, the Night Elven leaders are now both present and still alive, and even Gilneas is part of the Alliance despite their centuries-long isolation. And also the gnomes are there, but they never really played a major part in the story to begin with. Meanwhile the Alliance has allied with elves who use void magic (which, in this universe, is as bad as demonic fel magic, just with less of an awful reputation because the Void Lords are more subtle and are playing a longer game than the Burning Legion), abandoned their longstanding allies the High Elves for dipping into Fel magic to stay alive, and the Nightborne (literally a faction of Night Elves who were enslaved to demons for a time) allied with the Horde despite both factions helping them.

I just... at every turn the alliance is praised and upheld as being righteous for waging war with their former slaves, while the Horde is depicted as evil and backstabbing despite having been founded and lead by persecuted peoples seeking community and understanding from one another. But if you actually look at their actions as a faction rather than just their leaders’ personalities, the Alliance is instigating conflicts with races who would mostly be fine with opening negotiations, even if they don’t really trust the Alliance due to a long history of oppression and genocide. And the Horde’s leaders undergo character death or literal death to keep having them be the villains, even when the Horde’s actual populace and military fight those characters too! The Alliance’s new allies are ones of convenience, half of whom would (and in the case of the Dark Iron Dwarves, did) backstab them in any other circumstances, while the Horde take in refugees and victims to help them recover. Blizzard keeps trying to have it be both ways, to have the Alliance be the righteous heroes and the Horde be monstrous villains, while still having the Alliance be racist colonizers and the Horde be victims of the Alliance and the burning legion.

#wow #world of warcraft

[blackjackkent]

OK, off to the Foundry. Very imposing, very LARGE building right near where we saved Volo, surrounded by a number of wrought iron gates and, of course, several Watchers.

After breaking through the gate, got a kind of fun little interaction between Karlach and Jaheira:

"These Steel Watchers are big as hell!" "All the more cracks and crevices for a wild-shape to ferret into - gum up the works a little." "[laughs] I'd give my other horn to watch that!"

XD

Tragically I don't have the option to actually play this out, because the smallest form I'm allowed to transform Jaheira into is a cat. But it does provide an entertaining mental image.

I was going to try for a sneakysneak approach to get inside (in the hopes of avoiding fighting any more Steel Watchers until after we'd gotten the lay of the land) but unfortunately there's a guard waiting just inside the door and Hector biffed his attempt at bluffing his way inside (unsurprisingly). So we did have to fight one guy so I'm not sure if this counts as sneakysneak anymore.

Jaheira comment as we start wandering through the factory: "Someday I will sit down. I mean it." I love her. I will stop saying this never.

(Unironically I have gone down such a Jaheira mental rabbit hole since getting into Act III and starting to bring her places. I liked her a lot in BG1/2 but most of my feels were more centered around Caden and Aerie and Rasaad, but I've really been starting to get The Feels about her in recent weeks.)

Stepping through the big inner door and it seems we got here just in time for a showdown happening between the Gondians and their guards.

My initial thought was that Gortash gave a kill order when he learned his hostages were no longer hostaged - but it is much better. THE GNOMES ARE RISING! \o/

"You have beaten and tormented us to the brink of insanity! You cut out my eyes! But we will bow no more! GONDIANS! Rip the Motivator from this bastard's hands! FOR GOND!"

FUCK YEAH GET HIS ASS! WE'RE WITH YOU!

#bjk plays baldur's gate 3 #hector carlisle #let's fucking gooooo

[entityredacted]

Do u have any headcanons for empires?? I wanna know, very curious rn :D

Cuz one of my most important headcanons that i will hold onto till the end of the season is that Scott's a llama :3

Oh I am beyond delighted that you asked

Some of these contradict themselves and don't work together but hey I do what I want

I also like the llama thingy you mentioned, however to add to that i like to think he got Emperor’s new grooved by that witch he keeps mentioning when talking about his backstory (I stole this from someone, don't remember who)

Skeletron (Joeys main enemy) is his ex who got killed and was then reanimated and promptly tried to murder Joey which is why they're enemies now

Everyone is the reincarnations of the emperors of the previous season

To add to the previous hc, Xornoth also got reincarnated (de-eviled tho) and is literally just hanging out in Chromia. One thing that's different about him tho is that he remembers all his past lives and still sees Scott as his brother and spends the majority of his time messing with him (stealing/moving items, replacing his toothpaste with mayonnaise etc)

Scott has a lot of very colourful tattoos, specifically one of the enderdragon on his back with flowers around it that sprawl out over his whole back and arms

Shubble from s1 accidentally got doubly reincarnated (so there's both a witch Shelby and a gnome Shelby) and she hangs out in Chromia with Xornoth (they're besties)

Sausage is buff. I mean it makes sense, he's an apprentice blacksmith and a lumberjack there's no way he's not absolutely ripped

Hermes keeps a diary, in it he writes everything from what he and his dads have been doing to how the totally discreet and secret (/s) romance between Sausage and Scott is going

Scott occasionally grows flowers from his scalp, he has no clue what the hell causes it and its a bit annoying but at least it's cute. What kind of flower happens to start growing depends on how he's doing mentally (he grew a cactus once when he was really pissed off)

Another hc for Joeys and Skeletrons relationship: They literally only hate eachother because both think the other is coming for their brand ("I'm the king of the sea!" "No I am!" "No!") Just real fucking petty

Hermes was born out of a golden waterlily in the lake under stratos and he keeps that lily behind their left ear at all times, it's magic so it never dies

Katherine is, not unlike Sausage, also really buff. It's one of the reasons Joey likes her so much (come on who doesn't like a very pretty super buff woman)

Jimmy is a centaur

Fwhip has sensory issues, he hears so well but many noises hurts his ears and brain :(

Scott's yellow eye is a magical prosthetic, he can see out of it and move it as if it was a regular eye but he also needs to take it out every now and then for maintenance (and to freak out anyone nearby)

I think that's all!

#mcyt #entitytalks #empiresblr #empires smp #empires season 2 #empires scott #empires jimmy #empires joey #empires sausage #empires fwhip #empires katherine #empires xornoth #empires hermes #empires shubble #empires headcanons #ask answered #your asks

[popculturebuffet]

Top 20 Animated Episodes of 2022 Part 1: 20-11

Happy new year all you happy people! It's that time of the year again for my top 20 episodes of the year list!

For those new, which is likely a lot of you as these things tend to blow up, every year I take 5 episodes max from every show I watched, as given both this blog's busy schedule and my habit of putting things off I don't get to everything i'd like to (Personal apologizes to Dead End Paranormal Park, The Cuphead Show, Transformers Earthspark, Mike Judge's Beavis and Butthead apart from one episode, and Primal), and pick the best. As for why not just do a top 10 , or as I tend to do 12, there's a few simple reasons.

1) Since this blog started with just single episode reviews of shows and it continues to be the blogs backbone, it honors what I do, and is a nice way to really single out the episodes that really hit the high points for a season.

2) Even when i'm hitting a LOT of shows in a year, I still don't usually reach 20, and even if I did it wouldn't feel like enough to make a proper list and 5 seems too few.

3) It's something few other people do , especially for animation, so it stands out more while still allowing me to reflect on the year in animation

Now that's settled, before we get to the list under the cut let's talk about 2022.. but first just let me.. mentally prepare myself

Okay now ii'm mildly prepared 2022..

On the one hand we got a lot of good content. In addition to those fine, critically raved about shows I mentiond I didn't get to I got to PLENTY of good animation this year: While Owl House got screwed over last year, it started going down swinging with it's best run of episodes followed by a special that's just shy of breaking 5 million views on youtube and made disney realize they fucked up real good. So with a new regime hopefully it won't bow forever next year. Amphibia did bow out with an utterly heartstopping finale, The Great North has reached it's peak, while they sadly bowed out Tuca and Bertie and Close Enough still had great seasons to close out on as they left us wanting more, and we got two utterly record smashing debuts; Smiling Friends which is still a sensation even now and is easily one of the best adult comedies in recent times, which is not the easy feat it once was, and Legend of Vox Machina not only continued Amazon Prime's hot streak, but proved to be a hilarious yet deeply integlent and compelling fantasy.. that still had a song about tugging a gnome's motherfucking beads, a goliath nakedly diving into acid, and one or four heroes going through a tragic arc that included an accidental pact with a vengeance demon complaning that his love intrest just yah'd him like a horse while running away from demons. There was a lot of fantastic stuff. And that's not even getting into the films I haven't got to or the one I have with PUss in Boots.

Behind the scenes though?

Yeah, let's start with the appitizers first; Disney continued it's slow march towards death, putting Turning Red on Disney+… depsite the fact that unlike the previous two straight to D+ orders, which were undrestandable.. they simply coudl've delayed it by a few weeks or delayed lightyear.. which in contrast bombed HORRIBLY in theaters. It also came out Disney gladly funded various florida senate members who ended up passing the contriversal don't say gay bill, which is beyond standard disney fuckups into a level of vile. Thankfully Old New Boss bob iger stepped in at the end of the year, so their might be hope.

Netflix also seems in flux: on the one hand they still put out lots of critcally aclaimed animation.. and on the other they keep canceling things, not knowing what their doing, so their fine.

Ironically though what caused me the most stress this year to the point I spiraled into depression in anxiety wondering if anything I did mattered.. was Warner Bros Discovery. After champinoing Cartoon Network and HBO MAx as a safe haven for animatoin, a great place, and generally great.. the celeing cave in, the floor gave out and what was left got set on fire, covered in spiders and some sort of hobgoblin who hates animation , diversity and sometimes it feels me specifically took hold.

That hobgoblin.. was Dave Zaslav, head of discovery, new head of warner brothers and absolute human nightmare. In the span of just a few months he canned two full movies, Batgirl and Scoob 2 and made it so they can never be finished or released, and that… just something so disrepectful to it's crew, moneywasting and pr headachey that it still lingers to this day (Mostly batgirl but even not carring about Scoob 2 what the fuck).. was him JUST GETTING STARTED. Over several months he took a fucking chainsaw to hbo max, cutting content left and right and leaving many shows that were either streaming only like Close Enough or hadn't got a dvd release like Victor and Valentino, Mao Mao and FAR TOO DAMN MANY to list, effectively homeless, the most galling to me being completely digitally delisting final space, TAKING AWAY PEOPLE'S ALRAEDY BOUGHT DIGITAL COPIES, and generally destroying the franchise… to make 5 bucks. I know he likely got more than that but come the fuck on. It is not an exageration nor slandar to say David Zaslav cares less about the company functioning.. and more about making money to the point he's just.. liscneding shows they had the rights to to other streamers. Which is good as at least htey wont be cast into the void, but it's galling to have someone so greedy even something as simple and to some actors VITAL as residuals makes him wince. He has done exactly ONE THING right in making James Gunn head of the DCEU and I still don't trust him not to step in and fuck tha tup for James, the viewing public and good taste because his track record is if it costs money

I wasn't REMOTELY joking about that anxiety attack. When someone disrespects your medium THIS BADLY , it makes you quefstion everything your doing. I came around realizing I can keep these things alive and keep him acountable, but it still hasn't been easy constantly wondering what he's going to do next to fuck things up, to fuck up possible retrospectivges or just generally make animation worse. He has been a waking nightamre and has single handeledly made the year harder. It was hard enough with Elon Musk's takeover of twitter (Which i'm on more now, you can find me HERE), republican garbage still rising up and making LBGTQ+ peoples lives hell, JK ROwling somehow getting even worse and way too many gutpunch celebrity deaths… but this year will be SO MUCH EASIER if Zaslav finally goes down. Please… WB get rid of him before he eats you from the inside. And you reading please.. dont' harass him. It won't help. You can call for his resignation, but please do so respectfully. We do not want to be ignorant yowling jackasses. Just be good people.

So this year was highs, lows and not so creamy middles.. but what shows rose to the top? What shows were the best? Or at least almost the best but not quite? Find out bellow as I count down The first 10, Numbers 20-11, of my top 20 animated episodes of 2022!:

20. X-Mas with the Skanks Adventure (The Great North)

"It isn't a Lone Moose White Elephant without someone running off into the night to cast something in the lake"

The Great North is as show I liked a lot last year and that has only improved with age, to the point I really wish more people talked about this wonderfully charming, bonkers little show. It has great characters, even greater voice acting and some of the most hilariously weird plots i've seen in a sitcom while still being grounded in the characters themselves. And season 3 is the show hitting it's stride, as while season 2 was pretty good (and we'll see an episode form that later) Season 3 has been the show's consitently best season, with such plots as the tobins minus beef getting addicted to an outback stakehouse style restraunt Beef dosen't want them to go to, a disaster drill that's dinosaur themed, beef inviting all his love intrests to a dance and all of them being fine with it once the misunderstanding is cleared up, the town deciding to have a man who carves wives for sailors cave a really , really handsome man to win a local yachting compettion, having to cart the local millionare to an island while the kids all go overboard on being rich for a change, and the tobins all turning on each other over beef's obession with the movie Enough Said. It's all great stuff, though what ultimately won was a premise smaller in scope but no less dumb, and just in time for christmas.

While the show's last Christmas episode was great, X-Mas takes it to a new level with a very simple, realistic but still hilarous idea: It's the annual Lone Moose White Elephant, which while bringing in tons of the towns great character from the easily impresssed Santiago Carpachio, the aptly titled Drama John, deadpan death lover and my adopted daughter Bethany, and the calm soft spoken Mayor Peepers, it also opens old wounds: As the Tobin kids tell Honeybee, several christmases ago the kids got one of those singing anamatronic dealies, you know your singing fish, bears, etc, the kind that annoy the heck out of parents if overused and the kind i'm sure most children have had at a least one point. I had a singing fish and thus deeply related to the episode of Big City Greens where Cricket bonded with his while trying to resolve his repeated attempted murders.

Skanky is no exception, a very weird x-mas tree that sings a christmas version of Mambo #5, shakes it's various balls that are supposed to be sex oragans mut make no sense as such and delighting the kids.. and slowly driving beef mad to the point he finally got rid of it last year. And given the Tobins turns had all passed, they coudln't get him back and due to a recall coudln't find one online. Granted i've never seen that stop someone from selling something online but still point is they were skankless.

Part of what makes this so funny is that normally the Tobins aren't at each other's throats: their one of the most loving supportive families you can see. As Honeybee evne points out this episode Beef would normally give his kids the shirt off his back "I've seen you do it multiple times when Wolf forgot to get dressed. " So seeing him both so throughly against something that makes the kids happy, while seeing them all so against their dad is a nice contrast, and is also nicely petty. I do love the close knit family we have here but sometimes i'ts fun to see the stupdiest things turn them against one another while still being plausable.

You can probably see where this is going as Londra, their boat neighbor friend and happily married lesbian, has returned Skanky from whence he came, as he's started to haunt her and with her partner gone, she had a chance. This leads to a bloodthristy game of chess as the Tobins try to out manuver beef, as well as various townsfolk who want Skanky, not helped by Honeybee understandably switching sides as Skanky is awful. Hilarous but I woudln't want him in my house. We also get a neat subplot about Moon and a pregnant reindeer that bonds him with his new friend and love intrest introduced this season so dat's nice. But the main draw is this hilariously stupid conflict. And while it does get a nice emotinal tie, Beef also ties Skanky to the fact he was all he could afford and ashame of him, it never looses the core with beef being ready to cast it into a lake at one point, and being quitely infurated as the kids get a twerking snowman as a replacement. This episode scraped onto the list barely beeting out vampire keanu reeves but it's townwide fun and the sheer werid specificity of this feud while still somehow being relatable got me.

19. Charlie Dies and Dosen't Come Back (Smiling Friends)

"Grandma what are you doing here?" "Oh I cursed and said DAMN in 1958 when your grandpa was shot by that ROTTEN burgalar!" "… well that seems unresonable I don't think you should be in hell for that."

Smiling Friends had one heck of a pilot last year, a hilariously dark tale of two colorful cartoon characters trying convince a man not to kill himself.. while said man has a gun casually pointed at his head the whole time. It shoudl not have worked as well as it did, but man it did helped by the bizzare quest of Alan to get his cheese back from some rodents.. and also find out why some guy is living in his wall but cheese first.

It's no shock then that when Adult Swim dropped the first season all at once early last year, it blew the internet in half, became a huge sensation and is easily one of the best comedies in Adult Swim's storied history. It can be weird as hell but unlike some adult sitcoms dosen't just throw weird shit at you, but uses it to craft jokes, to create contrast in general just to be great. And this episode is a great showcase as to why while also being a shocking bit of character development in a show that mostly sticks to just living episode by episode.

In this one, yet ANOTHER christmas episode (likely because the show was originally scheduled for late 2021), the smiling friends head out to get a tree and Charlie's lack of enthusastim for getting his job or damn near everything finally grates on Pim, who meekly but firmly approaches it. Charlie, being kind of an ass, explodes on him over this, makes a scene.. and then dies for his hubris.

He arrives in hell with his hellish bed, hellish tv and jeremy his helish source of entertainment, aka one of the best running gags in human history.

Just.. the animation there as the wind goes out of him… beautiful. Getting help from his grandma whose in hell for, as detailed in the quote, not the fairest reasons, and watching her deepthroat a lollypop whiel laughing manically, Charlie journey's through hell and finds Satan. This gag.. is fine. Like Satan being mad over a doordash is hilaroius, I won't lie but him just being an introverted gamer on his computer is thek ind of gag tha'ts just been done neough. You can do more with the devil being funny, just look at the Cuphead show this year or Futurama in the past. That said him deciding to just.. not help charlie after he makes him smile and jeremy getting his revenge helps.. as does the literally deus ex machina that saves him GOD VOICED BY GILBERT GODFREY, which is not only just.. brilliant casting but took on a LOT of extra meaning after his untimely passing not long after. He got to go out of his long, distinguished voice acting career playing god. You coudln't ask for a better sendoff.. nor a better ending as Charlie ends up on earth a bit less cynical and a lot less naked. He probably won't change, this isn't that kind of show.. but what this show is is deeply hilarious, creative and weird and i'm happy to get at least one more season of it.

18. Grandma Smugglers (Craig of the Creek)

"Your dad is an utter smokeshow and I say that with the utmost respect" One of my greatest regrets on this list was not putting Capture the Flag on here last year. It's why I took off the regulation that I had to watch every or almost every episode of a show to qualify. The special was a grand finale to the shows longest arc that also tapped into it's continuity so deeply it made me want to see what the nods I didn't recognize were about and got me to catch up.

That was well worth it as Season 4 may be Craig of the Creek's best yet. With the kingdom disolved, there's now more to explore, omar is now around full time and the show continues to be a nice comforting bit of greatness to dig into every few months when Cartoon Network releases a batch of episodes.

This episode in paticular takes advantage of things now that the other side is free by focusing on Raj, one half of the honesuckle rangers aka the show just casually having a gay couple that starts out as bumbling antagonists subserviant to a cruel dictator then quickly has them become some of our heroes most steadfast alllies.. who were weirdly absent from the final battle but hey the capture the flag game had a LOT of moving parts.

This time we see Raj's home life and it's honestly nice. He has a loving dad who JP can't help but comment is a total smokeshow (with all respect). Which..

He's also voiced by Danny Pudi who i'm delighted to see post-ducktales and I was happy to find out has a major role in earthspark.

Raj also has a grandma, a kind woman who moved here when there was no one to take care of her in her native india, and whose son is overprotective of her. He clearly loves her and the warmth between them just.. melts my heart and reminds me of my own grandmas. What's unique though is tackling the immigrant experince, growing older and generally a lot of things you don't see in a kids cartoon but Craig of the Creek does it's best to be represenative as hell, often showing off unique part sof the various kids cultures.

The core of this episode is also heartwarming as Raj wants to sneak his grandma out, hence the title.. but to see a waterfall in the creek that's similar to one she grew up with. It's a simple goal with Kelsey, JP and Mortimor filling in for her.. and failing badly turning it into a race to get there.. and allowing Raj's father to see that maybe he needs to ease up on his mom, still take good care of her, but let her enjoy her life. It's a simple, sweet story, the kind Craig of the Creek really excels at and in a list full of hard choices, this one was well… simple

.

17. The Core and the King (Amphibia)

"Don't you think it's time to say goodbye to those childhood friends of yours, son?"

Amphibia Season 3b.. was a mixed bag. On the one hand it was necessary to set up the finale, helped further Sasha's character growth and the post apocalyptic amphibi was kinda neat… but mostly it just felt like the series spinning it's wheels and ocasionally doing something to help set up the final conflict.. then making all of this near pointless by having the gathered army just.. give up in the third to last episode. As you can probably tell as much as I love the show.. it's one of it's weaker periods. So there weren't a ton of episodes from this that made the list but the two (technically four, and just with that you can probably guess which one made it to the next part of the list), that made it are some of the series best.

Core and the King gives us Andrias' hinted at backstory, why he talks about friends so much that even not knowing it.. both Anne and Marcy figured something was up seperatley in Marcy's Journal.

What could've been a simple tale of Andrias being evil and his friends having to turn on him.. we see it wasn't that simple. Turns out while Andrias people were indeed conquerers it was widely accepted. That was a shock to me, if not a suprising one: if you grow up your whole life thinking ransacking entire worlds, leaving them lifeless and hollow and keeping some of the surivviors just to study and make new advancments to conquer the next place is fine just fine, it'd be hard to question until something pushes it. Both Steven Universe and She Ra have detailed the deprogramming that'd take.

Andrias was indeed happy and had two friends, Leif and Barrel. Yes the same guy what made that neat hammer grime uses. Also Leif is very clearly a plantar, to the point Anne also called that along with us, and the finale confirms it. Not the most vital takeaway here but they were not subtle.

Things are fine though Andrias' abusive dad Aldrich, played phenominally by William Houston who apparnetly played a similar character in dark souls, encourages him to drop his friends. As it turns out being absorbed into the core was a tradition.

Things take their turn, and thankfully save the world from early ruin, when Leif holds the calamity box.. and gets a vision of the world ending. When she can't swaw Aldrich because fuck if he cares he'll just find another world to ravage and start over, she's forced to take drastic measures. And this is what makes the betrayal suprisingly layered and what makes this work so much for me: while we know Leif did the right thing, she still had to steal from her best friend, plunged the kingdom into darkness, and forced Barrel to make the hard decision to let her go. She did the hard thing.. but it didn't come without consequences, lost her everything and everyone she knew, forced her into hiding, and ruined her life for a while. She did recover eventually.. but as we saw in the finale it took a LONG time for that to happen. It's a soul crushing decission as no one wins and we knew no one would… we just didn't know it'd be this sad or not nearly as straightfoward. Sure Andrias is doing the wrong thing.. but he's a kid abused into beliving this is all okay, with no real choice to pivot from what his dad once who then had said dad and every other horrible ancestor he has scremaing in his head for the rest of his life. While it dosen't make what Andrais did REMOTELY okay, it makes him far more sympathetic than I thought possible, someone who really had no chice but ot become the monster he did and how simply not backing his friend up, for the understandable reason of not seeing her dreams, screwed him up badly. It's a truly harrowing well built episode that nicely sets up the finale.. I really wish there were more like it leading up to it but i'll take what I got.

16. Say It Again, Ham, Adventure (The Great North)

"I didn't want Drama. I guess I just kept coming out because I wanted one single perfect moment"

So back to the GREATTTTT NORRTTTTH and like the above episode, i've covered this one. See back in June Kev pitched me "Queer as a Fox".. which I sometimes put as gay as a fox because my brain is very tired. Point is it was a look at Fox's animated queer content over the years… with Simpsons mostly getting it right, Family Guy having either gay sterotypes or a transphobic diatribe that will likely be the worst thing i've reviewed for the rest of my career, and American Dad just being sorta

But for the finale I picked out the Great North, both to give us an even four and because it was the first one of these Fox Sitcoms to just come out, pun intended, and have a queer character in the main cast from day one and not have them be a sterotype or it be their whole personality. It's just there. Hence Ham, a loveable odd ball with a flair for baking whose always a moment behind everyone else and who comes out in the first episode.. for what's clearly the 80th time. While the crew could've just left the joke at that… they later decided in the back half of season 2 to explore this; Why HAD Ham come out so much?

So while watching a movie with his monotone but loving and kind if also frequently slow on the uptake boyfriend Crispin, about a racecar driver having to come out as gay, and also in a way that nicely lampoons various queer media that's just about screaming

Over and over. Ham assumes this kind of coming out isn't usual and while Crispin's wasn't that bad and his parents, while taking a second accepted they did light fireworks and have to pay massive damages over said fireworks. It then , while also giving us LOTS Of Fun ham coming outs (From using it as a suggestion during one of Judy's improv gigs, to Mayor Peepers annual silly wig party which has Ham in a sailor moon wig, to white water rafting), reframes it as Ham wanting more from his coming out. His family was simply kind, loving and supportive and while he liked that for such an important moment in his life.. he wanted a tad of gravitas.

And being a nice, supportive loving family (Even if Beef was going through some stuff in the pilot he still told him "And we love you just the way you are dammit!"), the Tobins gladly agree to help Moon stage a second more dramatic coming out by having come out to Beef's Cousin Danica. Danica.. is the worst in the most hilarious way possible, having not heard from the tobins since she Moon was a baby and she wrote on the back of his birth announcment "Please stop". She also has an entirley beige house and upon meeting her for this plan, which Beef while going along with is ready to pull his son out of if she's too hurt, tells Judy she looks like a floozy (Something Judy finds entertaingly insulting. )

Things quickly esclate though as it turns out Danica was hiding some thefts and holds the tobins hostage, minus Wolf and Honeybee who are trying to do a true crime podcast, and soon have to contend with Danica's basement, trying to escape, and the fact danica only has tvoed episodes of fraiser with commentary on them.

We also get two hilarious Chief's, Chief's Edna and Elba (one voiced by the wonderful kat dennigs) who are delightful as they are enept, and barely manage to actually pull off arresting her. Ham also has the revelation he dosen't need a dramatic coming out and it's a good thing his family is like this.. not everyone GETS to have a safe, sedate coming out and it's nice of the show to acknowledge that not every coming out has to be dramatic or traumatic for the person doing so and it'd be a nicer world if we had more soft acceptance like the tobins give. but also gets to have one safely with his family acting it out. It's a truly sweet moment with a very nice hug at the end. Overall an excellent episode

15. Clouds on the Horizon/ King's Tide (The Owl House)

"Watcha Playin?"

I originally had just kings tide but I realized these two.. are basically a two parter, similar to the end of the previous season. While the final quarter of season 2 is just one long narrative roller coaster it's these that bring it to it's end.. and prepare us to board the NEXT ONE for season 3, and overlap, even if both have diffrnet goals.

Our first half sets up Eda and the CATS plan to sabotage the day of unity, while Luz's , while first just seeming to be a sidequest to rescue her sweetie with her nerdy best friends who used to alwasy be beside her but had thigns to adress elsewhere but are now back beside her.. ends up being important.

On a character level after a season of putting up with Odalia's shit, her entire family rebels against her: THe twins actively try to help Amity sabotage her, and Alador is revealed to be badly domestically abused, working because Odalia threatned the kids otherwise, and stands up to his soon to be ex wife. We get the aawesome battle sequence you'd expect from that, as well as Kiki slipping further.. and slipping that the emperoror has a spy in the CATS and thus knows about the plan, leading to luz ducking away. It's an intense, fun episode with one big heartwarming moment, the second most cathartic divorce of 2022, and a hell of a cliffhanger.. to be resovled righ tnow.

I combined the epis because raelly they flow right into one another, being one big climax to the season and EVERYTHING it's built up, the first half finishing Amity's subplot, and tying in Kiki's slow fall.. and the next one containing every damn thing else paying off.

The first horrifying thing is that despite our heroes best efforts and another neat fight scene… Belos WINS. At least for a few minutes: Even as the rest of our heroes airship their way to be big damn heroes, Luz deals with Belos personally as with his genocide already on autopilot, and Terra and the other collabeerators thinking their getting paradise much like odalia finishign the job for him only to realize he lied and they'll die, he tosses the Collector into the bottom of his super villian lair and prepares to go off ot earth dellusional that it'll all be great.

The episode has a nice air of hopelessness as Luz DEAPERATELY tries to stave things off by sigil stamping belos, a clever big of using his own racisim and ego against him by playing up his need for a guide.. then has to fight a blob monster. It's an episode where, much like for most of the season.. our heroes are loosing. Their doing their best and without sigils aside from hunter (Who being basically human can fight it off easier I guess), and we get a great fight.. and a truly sad moment when Belos gaslights hunter again, but it's ultimately a loosing one: our heroes are good and we get to see just how far they've come across the series and season, with Luz using a truly awesome looking pheonix-esque x made of fire to kick thigns off.. but ti also shows how outmatched they always were: they keep growing, evolving getting better as people and as witches.. but their up against someone whose been getting worse as a person but even better as a witch for a century and who even without his magic has freakys hapeshifting powers and hulk strength.

The desperation makes King's decision to free the collector.. make sense: there was no other option: his mom was dying (even if rahne manages to cut eda's arm off before she completely dies), his friends and sister were dying.. this was his only option. And it shows that just because i'ts not belos.. dosen't mean the Collector isn't any more dangeorus showing that he's still a child in mind and body.. and using that to be twilight zone level's of terrifying.

The simple image of a child in wha'ts basically pajamas, holding belos attack with one finger and simply asking "whatcha playin".. is as aweosme.. as it is terrifying. This is a being who just had our heroes all but beat and has been behind everything.. and he gets swatted away with just two fingers like it was NOTHING and makes the collector approaching our heroes right after that much more terrifying.. as is their escape with our heroes BARELY regrouping ot earth.. and king once again making a massive sacrifice. While the collector stopped the spell.. the isles are at his mercy and our heroes are even more lost than before… with the very foe they just lost.. not as gone as they think. It's a tense thrill ride of a two parter that somehow manages to fliip the table again just in time for it to all come crashing down and I coudln't wait ot see how it goes.. and still can't wait to see how it all ends… still wish we had ore episodes what the fuck disney. But what we got.. holy shit will it stay with me for years to come.

14. Enchanted Forest (Smiling Friends)

"Which hand of the Witch hand will it be? Gahahahahaha!" "This is the most obnoxious thing i've seen in my life. "

Look sometimes the things that make it on these lists are terrifying showdowns with abusive genocidal assholes or god children. And sometimes i'ts an optimist and a lazy pesimist wondering through a fantasy forest that just happens to be in their town for some reason while acompanied by a rotoscopped hobit who wants them to deliver an IED to his Stalking Victim. Sometimes I just want goblins and refrences to my childhood. I'm a simple man. Okay that's a lie i'm a man who has about 80 intrests that fight for my head, an obession with keith david and who constantly refrences a comic strip more people need to hear of

But I do love this episode which takes a simple stock plot, Charlie dosen't want to do something (Something being quest in the fantasy forest their in), Pim wants to, Charlie ends up being better at it… and somehow weaves in comic gold like the hand witch (and her excellent chopping skills), goblins (one of my faviorite things and I do like how this paticular goblin shows up a decent amount. ) , and of course Mip, a direct rotoscoped parody of the Bakshi versions of Hobbit and Lord of the Rings. Do I love seeing this refrenced in modern day? Absolutely. Do I love that Mip has weird sexual tension with charlie, dosen't raelly break character and turns out to be an elaborate homage to Bjork's stalker?… yes and no respectively. Mip is really what makes the episode, though having charlie save some aliens and the suddenly grim ending dosne't hurt either. Not the most complex episode.. but sometimes an episode just needs to be funny and the fact they went to the trouble of rotoscoping a character just to get the refrence right shows Smiling Friend's craft: the animatoin is simple but can speed up in complexity, change styles or what have you just ot sell the joke or moment better. That and goblins. Always goblins.

13. Fate's Journey (The Legend of Vox Machina

"Faster Percy Yah Yah!" "I'm going as fast as I can, this carriage isn't built for speed and did you just Yah me?!"

Legend of Vox Machina was one of the nicest suprises i've ever had in animation. I had no real idea the adaptation of Critical Roll's first campagin was coming, and was only vaugely aware critical roll existed because Your Turn To Roll showed up in my spotify recomendations (And it slaps). So finding out that in the wake of invincible Amazonw as rolling out ANOTHER animated adult action show that looked like if James Gunn did a fantasy show.. I was intrigued. And after the first three episodes, as Amazon releases the show in batches of three, I was HOOKED. While it took me far too long to get to actually watching Critical Roll itself I fell in love with this show and while only having heard of two of it's voice actors before this (Ashley Johnson and Sam Rigel, Tulip/Lake and Donetello respectively), I became a huge fan of all of them after. Vox Machina takes a dungeon and dragons campaign and condensed it into 12 joyous episodes that still have the spirit of chaos of a campaign, while also telling a deeply compelling story of revenge, friendship, and scanlan's crotch. The series deftly ballances the tragic vengeful story of Percy as he edges closer to literallya nd figuratevely selling his soul for revenge with great character moments for all involved, and PLENTY of hyjinks from team bard Scalan pulling a distractoin by singing a song on tugging on his motherfucking beads while wearing a sparkly codpiece (One DIRECTLY MODELED on one of VA Sam Rigel's own costumes)

A planning scene where brusier Grog's plan is kill everyone including the guy their rescuing while Scalans is "Down a bunch of mystery poitions and hope I live, and Scalan's attempt to translate a book they got from their enemies devolvling into him and Vax giving each other two handed middle fingers. And of course the majestic game of ball tag, which starts at the breakfast table and escalates to Vax elbowing Grog in front of an offical for a 3 pointer. The series is a nice ballance of hilarious , heartfelt and generally horrifying, and it is awesome.

And while it's a bit of a thrill ride, having to pack over 50 hours of campagin into 10 episodes (the first two based on a pre-stream adventure that ends up being VITAL to the plot Season 2 adaps), it dosen't mean our team dosen't take time to stop and breathe and it's why Fate's Journey has stuck with me so much.

After a disasterous first encounger with the Briarwoods, the vampire and necromancer power coupled that slaughtered Percy's family and took over his hometown of whitestone and succesfuly enthraled the soverign of the land, our heroes are on the run out of town, minus their Cleric Pike (Whose reaffring her connection to her patron the everlight) and on the way to Whitestone to settle things. As a result we get a lot of nice character moments. Scanlan , despite normally being the extra horny extra hammy comic relief, tries to translate a book they stole from them, Grog, who sees pike as a sister, is morose over her being gone and convides in Vax and Vex, Vax's sister, tries to get Percy to open up and stop having a resting bitchface. We see both who our heroes are for a second, and see them truly bonding as more than just the only people who will loosely put up with one another.

We also get one of the seasons funniest scenes as during a relaxing campfire, the party recounts their weirdest kills: We get some badass ones with Vex casually killing Hotis which toally won't come back to bite him, Grog ripping a monsters jaw in half.. and some hilarious ones as Keyleth pushes an ogre into lava.. and then pushes him down while telling him to go to sleep panicked because he's not dead yet while everyone else looks on and horror and of course Scalan's.. is having a sex partner turn into a monster.. and still finishing.

That.. image aside, we also get a thrilling chase with Scalan getting kidnapped and sucking on a monster tentacle because of course, Grog being certain he wont survivie but heartwarmingly sad about it, and of course the greatst and funniest bit of ship tease in human history as Vex yahs percy as a horse and he undrestndably dosen't take it well. It's a relaxed episode that turns thrilling and leaves our heroes without any of their weapons.

The ending is also masterful.. in the most horrifying way possible. Earlier we see the briarwoods meet with some pesants seemingly doing some pr for their evil overlordship.. and at the end we find out WHY they, including a CHILD were invited…. as we see their bodies all hung on the sun tree in center of town dressed as Vox Machina. It's truly chilling, horrifying and I did not see it coming but man does it cut the bone even thinking of it now. I.. really don't have anything to follow that, fantastic episode.. next?

12. Any Sport In A Storm (The Owl House)

"Then there won't be any delay in branding you with Coven sigils and taking you away from your friends and family forever! Hooray!"

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME HUNTLOWWWWWW?

Yeah look I haven't hidden I ship this. I"m not a subtle person. It's why this guy is one of my spirit animals

So it's not a huge shock this one got on here, but it didn't just because a ship I started shipping before this went from "Maybe canon" to

In the span of one episode. This episode is a great character piece and thankfully spotlights both halfs of Huntlow well. After Willow spent most of season 2a gone, likely because Tati Gabrille is far busier than I could've possibly imagined, she gets one heck of a spotlight here that moves both her and Hunter's arcs forward, moves them together, and gives us a subplot with some Lumity that's.. fine. It's a nice little riff on fan theorizing and the azura thing, and it's ncie to see the two get a moment together that dosen't come with a lot of crap attached first. Just the two hanging out and being dorks.

But their not the dorks we're here for, nor why this episode is on this list. No it's the green and the gold for this one as Willow brings up a hithero unknown intrest in flyer derby.. basically a broom flying sport where you try to steal flags and beat the crap out of each other. You know for kids, and is forming her own team. At the same time in order to get the respect of an adult who hates him for something that isn't his fault because Hunter's life is a constant stream of abuse, brainwashing and doing sick flips, Hunter inflitrates the school.. and it goes how you'd expect

So when Hunter finds Willow, he finds a powerful prospect for the coven.. and someone who has the confidence, freedom and affablility he lacks, while she just.. straight up kidnaps her future boyfriend because she needs him for the team and while getting better at socializing still hasn't grapsed kidnapping isn't okay. Unless it is on the boiling isles but given Amity's reaction to being kidnapped and spit out by a giant owl, i'm wagering it isn't.

Either way we get adorable chemistry, a new power team/couple in viney and skara, and puddles the griffin.

We also get Hunter.. not understanding he was horribly abused and nearly consinging his friends to a horrible fate, standing up for them finally earning said adults respect… which like.. Darius man you really need to apologize for a.. .lot of things, and some good hunter blushing. All in all a good day for all. Horay!

11. Hellspital (Close Enough)

"It's a known fact doctors have killed more people than Genghis Khan and Chaka Kahn combined!"

Sadly this is Close Enoughs final time on this list as it was one of MANY casulaties of "David Zaslav wanted 8 more dollars", though it's for now thankfully avaliable to buy on youtube if nothing else. Why JG Quintel wasn't absolutely devistated I don't know, but it went out on a high with season 3 being fairly good. It also, while keeping a mixed ballance, fixed the one issue I had with season 2: there wasn't enough Alex. And Even then I got they simply needed to spread things out more evenly, so I wans't mad but boy oh boy did my boy get a great season, ending with getting Bridgette back but involving having his soul stolen by George RR MArtin, dating an alien tentacle monster instructor and of course going to hell.

The road to hell is paved with Childhood Trauma as Alex , after a golf course injury and on an all chili diet because of course he is, refuses to see a doctor after his dad went to the hosptial and got a terrible diagoniss when alex was a teen. Our heroes do everything in their power to not let his dumb ass die, but he ends up running away and bonking his head, but not before tons of jokes including him being tricked into their trap of a viking timelord marathoon (the season does manage his sudden obession with vikings that cropped up in season 2 after one joke about him writing a viking novel ins eason 1 work a LOT better without dominating his character this go round), despite having alerts for such an event, and nothing about it making sense only figuring out midway. Which is still good fo rhim

After hitting his head he end sup in a HELLSPITAL…. which is nightmarish as you'd expect, and well done at that, but gets heartwarming when Alex's dad decesnds from heaven, played by Henry Motherfucking Winkler who thanks to being in the upcoming season of Vox Machina has a VERY good chance of making this list two years in a row, and we get Alex having some heartwarming father son bonding with axes.. as well as the reveal his dad was sick a long time but simply didn't want to know he was.. and by the time he did it was too late. It teaches alex a hard lesson: that ignoring a medical problem because of bad news.. won't make it go away and the people who love you need you. it does so with time axes, demons and jabs at our awful healthcare system, but also with love. And gas which is what alex has. Chilli and all that

#the legend of vox machina #the great north #the owl house #amphibia #smiling friends #close enough #craig of the creek #Youtube

[nochi-quinn]

legend of vox machina season 2 episode 6: into rimecleft OR album drop when

YOU get a flashback and YOU get a flashback and YOU get a nightmare

nightmare/flashback value combo

they used up their entire blood budget in this one scene

okay wait no wait I know this is very serious and traumatizing but also I just

should the sword have been sitting naked next to pike anyway, that feels like a good way to cut yourself in your sleep

grog's expressions are great here

percy giving vex his jacket ❤

Let Pike Speak Challenge

"a temple. an old one." "aren't they all?" "not this old." old as balls

percy done with sphinx bullshit

lovm!vox machina getting the name off the bat while stream!vox machina is in the background fighting for their lives

osysa saying "it wounds me" was a hint

sphynxness

percy reaching out like he wants to stop vex and vax just shoulder-checking the fuck out of him

"brawn's not really my thing" neither are brains most of the time

CRAVIE

grog in a toxic relationship with his sword

"a heavy burden, being the matron's champion. fortunately for you, you won't live long enough to feel its weight." accurate but hurtful

the perc'halia crumbs in this episode

keyleth said the fuck word

pike thinking scanlan's just being a coward

and he is, a little bit, bc it's scanlan, but also

I called out grog earlier but all of the facial expressions this episode are so good

you made that big man cry

I'm glad scanlan gets a real character arc here, it's already much more satisfying than in the stream

roommate: oh thank god it shrank down to his size

"feels like a drug trip" keyleth immediately: fey realm

grog's reluctance is just travis desperately mentally begging matt not to come for his backstory next

FLORIDA DRAGON

kamaljiori like THAT'S MY GNOME, I DON'T KNOW YOU

that shot of the dust clearing as umbrasyl comes for vex & scanlan 🤌 🤌 🤌

umbrasyl running away with scanlan like a kitten with a piece of plastic

narratively, this gives scanlan a personal stake he didn't really have before. right now in this moment it makes me really sad.

the subtitle says "but he's" but I'm 90% sure it's pike calling grog "buddies" bc she uses the plural for him and I have never understood why

I was not expecting grog to make me cry until "fix him" but HERE WE ARE

the credits song is a sad instrumental of the Osysa song and I'm mad about it. how dare you Leaves From The Vine me like this.

#crititag #lovmtag #critical role #the legend of vox machina #liveblog #reaction post #spoilers

[acredb]

you guys are cool

*gives you my everhood au ideas*

spoilers for after arm getting so its after the cut

its very long i apologise

context: at this point, reds killed the forest spirit, the mushrooms, slim jim shroom (the sprunkel fight), the maze monster and gold pig

(this is literally just bc during a playthrough when i got to this point i figured "...yeah, this would hurt them mentally." so i MADE it hurt ;3 ) (they killed gold pig out of spite, they were the only person red WANTED to kill not counting maze monster)

they couldnt bring themself to kill their friends so they quit. they didnt let the lost spirits know that they were quitting the murder rampage, they just did. ofc the lost spirits weren't happy about this, so they started to 'punish' red for this. they appeared in their dreams, *fucked up* their dreams, and every so often one of them would appear and just...lecture them, using their mental state against them, so this hurt

nobody alive knows about them, not even blue

reds become a lot more protective, meaning theyll get mega pissed if someone hurts blue, green learned the hard way (they decided to prank red into thinking theyd killed blue (dumbass) and red almost killed them they were so upset)

a few weeks? go by and red decides theyve had enough of constantly fearing that they'll hurt their friends so they decide 'What's the point of keeping this stupid arm if all it does is hurt people?' and casually drop it into the incinerator where it burns to a crisp

the lost spirits did NOT like that.

(zoom in to read details but im explaining it more so uh) the lost souls got a lot more direct in how they were making red regret this. they appeared in their dreams *every night* instead of just when they felt like, and warped them more and more until red would wake up terrified

the spirits started following them everywhere, always just out of sight. every time red's seperate from the rest of the group, they appear, multiple at once.

this ended up driving red mad, and they go bezerk, running away into the Peaceful Forest (peaceful my ass) because theyre so afraid to hurt their friends now that theyre not taking any chances

because theyre so unstable they act like a scared animal, if they cant run theyll attack. literally the only person they wont try to hurt is blue, because even in their madness they know they care about them too much to hurt them

after a month and couple weeks of looking for them, rasta beast finds them in the forest eventually, very much scuffed. red does the whole regular run away thing, until they get cornered. a small (physical, not dance) fight breaks down, rasta fighting back in self defense, until they manage to knock some sense into red. for the first time in a while, red's comforted

this does nothing for their fractured mind, but it gives rasta beast a *little* more protection, because they can snap red out of it for even just a couple minutes

rasta beast goes back and tells the others (everyone hangs around prof.orange's lab cause protection) and prof.orange wants to get red into the lab maybe to study them or something so he sends green and purple mages to get them cause theyre magical and shit

after a mad goose chase the two lose red, but green finds some gnomes (the psychadelic ones) and asks them to get red high out of their mind so they and purple can bring them to orange

(little about the gnomes in this au, they can emmit pheromones that stimulate the mind like weed does because there is NO WAY red wasnt high for 'you want gnomes'. also whenever red is high theyre too overwhelmed to do anything so they eventually just flop over and see god until it wears off, which is why green got the gnomes)

it works and now purple and green are bickering about the morality of the drugging while dragging a practically passed out red to the lab

(ive come up with everything until this point, ill make a part 2 whenever i add to this)

(oh yeah and i forgot to mention but prof.orange has a machine and using it seperated pink and red so the vessel is sentient and the soul lives, orange also made a machine that translates some of red' thoughts into audible sound, they were so fucking happy when they heard their voice they cried)

#i like red everhood a healthy normal amount #everhood red #everhood #purple mage #green mage #rasta beast(for a little bit) #professor orange(for a little bit) #everhood au #fucking hell #no idea how tumblr works #acred's au bullshit

[eric-the-bmo]

The Neighborhood Watch S2 Ep4: Keep Greenville Weird

The month-long hiatus is finally over! So much happens to everyone except John, who has a nice day at work.

[Summary: Song takes Amira to be fixed and discovers the consequences, while Markus makes bad decisions. John tries his best at his new job, and Louis sparks up conversation with a conspiracy theorist.]

We pick up where we left off: in the charred wreckage of Song's house. Song and Fatima assure Amira she's fine as they wrap a scarf around the injured part of her face, while Amira insists she's fine and is very confused; she doesn't seem to realize she's a robot.

Louis and Markus show up and immediately begin to help putting out the fires as the trio above head to the Sumpath house; they're going to Arjun, Amira's father, so she can be fixed.

Some of the neighbors have started to come over to see what's happening; Shelby is one of them, still in her pajamas and looking like she didnt get much sleep. Bob Patterson, number one asshole neighbor, tries to come over to help- but with their current mental state, Markus is somehow convinced he's behind the explosion of Song's garage and threatens him. Bob puts his hand on the handle of his gun as a warning, and immediately Markus pulls out their knife and stabs him straight through the palm. Louis wanted to try and interfere, but upon seeing this, is all "oh nevermind, yikes"

Meanwhile, Song and Fatima take Amira over to Arjun, who takes them down to the high-tech basement of their house. He takes out a duffel bag full of gadgets, all with a logo- Song recognizes it as the logo of a company that exclusively works with her father. Arjun says a code to shut Amira down as he goes to fix her, and he's like "Song you can't tell anyone about this," and Song goes "alright let me cast a geas on myself so if i ever Do tell someone i'll die" Song and Fatima go upstairs, and right before the basement door closes behind them, they hear Arjun break down and cry.

With the fires almost out, Markus notices there's some weird melted plastic in the grass, so they scoop it up and leave. Louis finds the source of the explosion, the propane tank, and also a bunch of shattered gnomes. At this point he just goes "man, nothing is normal in this fucking town, jesus christ," and starts muttering to himself about it before deciding fuck it, he's going home- but then he sees that Ken, our resident conspiracy theorist npc, has been watching him. Ken tries to act all natural like he wasn't obviously spying, and asks what happened ["Was this a meteor, or an underground volcano..?"]. Louis has an idea, and invites Ken to chat with him, because perhaps this man has info that can help us. Kenneth is so so hyped about this offer to chat, because no one's been interested in his theories before! They head to the coffee shop.

John didn't notice the explosion as he's driven to work; I rolled too high. When he gets dropped off at the city hall, he meets up with Clara, his coworker. They're assigned to be at the corner of Main and Sapphire Street; they chat as the walk there, and John learns about her favorite places to hang out- turns out the reason they haven't met despite her being here her whole life was because they hung out at different spots, besides the coffee shop. He mentions it's been hard for him to get a job since he doesn't have a government ID, and Clara asks if he's an illegal immigrant- she then apologizes for asking that, and John says it's okay, since humans are curious by nature. He says he'll go with the immigrant explanation for now, and the two of them reach the street corner.

They speak to passerby; John learns from Joseph Miller, the park ranger, that the weird plant seeds grow very quickly, and Jebediah Ford, the Minister of the church, wished all of the other employees to get better. John asks Clara about this, and it turns out that some of the people at this job have been getting strangely ill; Not even Dr. Sutherland, the town's miracle doctor, can figure out what's going on- in fact, one of his patients has been moved to one of the city hospitals. John then spots Jack attempting to empty the garbage cans around town; the man seems sick, and he's wearing sunglasses. John realizes his symptoms are awfully similar to what he saw when Karen Patterson was sick in Season One... He's connecting the dots.

Speaking of the strange plants, Markus notices that one's been growing in their house- the seed they grabbed in s1 has been growing, and is overtaking one of their bug terrariums. When they try to get near it with their knife, the plant shoots them with thorns. The roots tear easily as Markus rips the plant off the terrarium, and they put it down the garbage disposal. Deciding not to stay in their house for a bit, they grab the melted plastic from earlier and heads over to Emmett's house- the AI analyzes the stuff, saying it appears to be fake skin. Markus suggests maybe Emmett should talk to Arjun about it- they guy worked for the government, after all, unbeknownst to Emmett. Markus leaves, and heads over to the Patterson's.

Over at the Sumpaths, Fatima is telling Song that she Arjun have always wanted a kid but it just wouldn't work out, so Arjun, being an engineer, built one. She says there was a lot of trial and error to get things right and that she still has nightmares about it sometimes, but they care about Amira very much. She starts to mention something about how it's a bit hard regarding something- but then Arjun and Amira walk out of the basement; she's on her phone like nothing had happened. And Arjun introduces her ["Amira, this is Ms O'Sullivan, she just moved in to the neighborhood."], and Song's player pieces together that Amira has completely forgotten the entire events of them game. Song and Amira practically re-enact how they met for the first time, before the witch excuses herself and begins to head out; but not before inviting Fatima over for coffee later.

At the Patterson's, Markus is snooping around the perimeter of their house. The lights are on in the basement, so Markus heads over to the side to look in through one of the basement windows. Inside, they see Bob with a medkit, fixing up the hand that Markus had stabbed earlier. Observing through the window, Markus sees there's something mounted on the wall much like a hunting trophy: It's the skull of a giant feline with antlers, and next to his is an entire wall full of weapons- this man is a monster hunter. Markus decides to walk around and knock on his door.

Song sees a moving truck outside of Lucretius (aka Lestat)'s home; he greets her, expressing sympathies about the explosion and how he would offer her a place to stay, but he's moving to another house on the block since his current one is too infested with bugs. He says that if her house is still in repair by the time he's finished moving in, he can let her stay for a bit- In the meantime, though, he asks if she'd like to head downtown with him and grab a bite to eat?

But Song looks over and sees two cars: a sleek black car, like the kind her father's employee's drive, and a police car. She declines Lestat's offer and excuses herself, and heading over to the cars to see what's up. One of the cops, Jason Chen, is putting up police/caution tape around the debris of her garage; he's not doing a good job but he's trying. The other cop is approaching the Patterson's house, and is revealed to be Bob's son.

Louis and Ken arrive at the coffee shop and are greeted by Jewel, the teen at the counter. They order coffee- Ken's order is very pretentious, while Louis gets an americano. Jewel spells his name wrong, and when he mentions this a voice from one of the booths- Tawny Evergreen, her boss- says that she's not allowed to spell the customer's names correctly. Louis gives Jewel a 50 dollar tip.

The two of them go to sit down. Ken is super enthusiastic about this, bringing out folders and everything, and Louis, who had already been regretting this, finally declares that this was a mistake and starts to leave. He tells Kenneth that his level of enthusiasm is too much, he's too into this, and that deters people away.

Ken gets upset and pleads with Louis to stay, saying that no one ever wants to listen to what he has to say, and how there's so much happening in town but he's the only one who can see it- and as Louis tries to walk away Ken grabs his arm; his eyes go white and his grip tightens, before he blinks and stumbles back. "[Our new neighbor's name] is LESTAT?"

Notes and Thoughts:

Shelby Nicole Waters my beloved, why are you tired? Im suspicious and reading too much into this

Once again, Louis continues to be the funniest PC in the entire game, it's so entertaining when he talks to himself.

HOORAY JOHN LAUGHED FOR THE FIRST TIME IN S2 <3<3

The title is taken from a patch on Ken's jacket!

We all started yelling at Markus's player for the garbage disposal decision, but really that's Such a good storytelling thing to do. Let's go bestie let's make it worse /lh

I'm very happy Emmett made an appearance again! I was worried he would only be a s1 character, so it's neat he's back! I also have a more concrete design in my head for him, so hopefully I can sketch him out soon

FATIMA. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU HAVE NIGHTMARES, HELLO???

God the favor Bob owes Markus means so much more if you consider he was probably worried he'd have to kill his wife in s1

LESTAT STAY AWAY FROM SON. BITE MAIM KILL

Markus is SO getting arrested oh my god

If I had a nickel for every time there was a blond prophetic conspiracy theorist in my ttrpg games, I'd have two nickels!

I don't think Ken is able to control his ability/what he sees! It seems to be activated by physical touch- good thing he didn't come into contact with any of the other Main Cast, yeah?

I am very very happy this game is back! We'll find out what happens next in two weeks! <3

#TNW MY FAVE TV SHOW <3 #eric finally speaks #motw oc #motw #the neighborhood watch #the neighborhood watch recap #monster of the week #motw campaign #ttrpg campaign

[grigori77]

Critical Role, Campaign 3 Episode 53

What the ... Sam is OUT OF THE STUDIO ... why is it suddenly gone all Spinal Tap? This is a strange skit ... but chaotic fun too ... XD

Xandis! Yay! Cool D&D movie plug ... and WHY os he going all FRENCH all of s sudden, Matt? Travis (cry laughing): "Wha ... he's evolving!"

Oh my ... Laura, your voice is sounding SO MUCH BETTER!!! :3 I'm so happy for you ... and yes, that IS so cool ... whoa, AABRIA IS LAYING CLAIM TO IT!!! XD D'awwww ...

Okay, so are we FINALLY gonna get to know what's happening with the others? Please, they have no healers, it's not safe for them right now ... HELP THEM!!!

What? NOOOOOOO!!! I mean SURE, I'm loving Aabria and Christian, but STILL ... come on guys, we can't just LEAVE the others like this! Orym must be going NUTS right now ... and LAUDNA!!! Not fair!

Chetney doing a feral murder hobo walk of shame ... yeah, FRIDA ... yeah, the shame is heavy and we feel for our boy right now ...

And there we go. Now he's thinking between his legs and it's all fine again. XD

Hmmmmm ... this is the question, is she REALLY all right with this or is she just humouring him?

Ah yes, Chetney's kinky thing again ...

Chetney's in a permanent condition of "half fucked up and half fuckable" ... yeah ...

It's the Solstice, it's fucked EVERYTHING up ...

FRIDA actually ENJOYED that? That is WEIRD ... Chetney: "You SHOT ME?!!!" FRIDA: "A few times, but I missed you more than I hit you."

Matt is STILL VEHEMENTLY AGAINST the tongue thing, Sam! XD

Okay, so we have A PLAN!!! Excellent. Let's get to it, there!

Fearne you unapologetic chaos gremlin, don't toy with our boy like that! XD

Deanna: "Do you think we BANGED IT OUT while you were asleep?" LOL

Come on, is there really ANY chance that FRIDA would actually become a robo-werewolf? Seriously? Meanwhile OH MY GODS these two are so adorable, FRIDA thinks this is fun and Deanna's having a mental HEART ATTACK ...

Smooth journey, at least. I thought 11 was supposed to be a less than stellar roll ...

Fearne going totally googoo about the goats ... :3 I love how it almost gets her shot as well XD ... good thing she's do strange, it's a good distraction.

Oh, here we go, these guys look a bit ... problematic ...

Under the jacket? Oh ... wow, that is actually REALLY COOL ... AAAAAAND he's asleep. XD

Oh wow ... Uthodurn is GORGEOUS ...

The Volition Disc ...

Knitting ... cool.

Okay ... clearly SOMETHING is off. Is this anything to do with the Solstice? Yeah, if in doubt just cast a Light spell. :3

"The Temples"? Hmmm ... that's ominous ...

Matt: "There's too much stuff in my brain! Sometimes it just leaks out!"

Good reminder, Chetney is EXHAUSTED, he NEEDS TO roll with disadvantage right now ... good roll anyway, though.

Ah yes ... that's true, Deanna and FRIDA don't really know about the baggage ... oh yes, and there we go, Imogen's breaking. I was expecting that at some point ... yeah ... Fearne hugs are good, yeah. I'm sure Laudna's fine ...

Wow ... Sam is REALLY walking a fine line with THAT flask ... XD

Titanic style gates ... and HERE WE GO, the Deliberation Disc ...

The varying scents of fear, according to Chetney Pock O'Pea ...

Oh ... the way is BARRED?!!! Hmmmmm ... yeah, this seems like a major thing ...

Ah, Chetney backstory! Yeah! Nice ... ooh, metal toys, not a good thing. I can see why it's a trigger for our gnome. Hmmm ...

The Vellum Steeple ... okay then ... and it's OPEN!!! Thank the gods ...

Shit. Once again something is OFF ... not a good sign.

Oh, this guy is clearly a bit much ... or maybe he's just overwhelmed, it certainly sounds like it.

Matt: "One of you make a deception check." Fearne: "I AM a professor!" XD

Ah yes, here we go, sneaky Chetney. Meanwhile 200 gold to Deanna! Awww ...

Chetney: "Can you hear my thoughts?" Imogen: "Yes." Chetney: "Balls. Wang."

The flask gets WORSE! Aabria is amused, in sn exasperated way. Matt: "Welcome to my world."

Dope ass Elven pompadour ... aaaaaah, Tilda Swinton, good choice!

Wow ... that revelation is NOT impossible for her to swallow? Damn ...

Oh, so it's not JUST the god-based stuff ... it sounds like this is BIG ...

Ressia? Yes, that's good, because the rest is a MOUTHFUL.

"Applebee's Solstice?"

Okay, here we go, the big rundown. Yup ...

Oh yeah, the Keyleth and Vax development, yeah ... that was SO BAD ...

FCG: "Can you nake magic work again?" Coin flip. Oh my gods ... "Nope."

Ancient bindng enchantments are now failing ... oh, now THAT is a MAJOR problem, isn't it?

Oh boy ... so what is THAT about out there?

Meanwhile invisible Chetney's just eating Skittles ... XD

Ah ... "fear reading" ... yeah ...

More sneaky Chetney ... yeah, he just can't help himself ...

Funky little vial ... headache medicine? Yeah, sounds about right.

Chetney (to Imogen): "The delay on your mind shit is WEIRD."

XD Chet being a scary ghost troll on Ressia ...

Is the rumble coming from BELOW? Southward ... hmmm ...

Cinnamon raisin bagels from FCG's magic oven ... crazy ... XD

FRIDA's arcane core? Hmmm ... sounds potentially useful, but also potentially DANGEROUS ...

They've SEALED the gates to the Grand Disc? Oh, that can't be good ...

Oh ... so they're EVACUATING the Disc? Okay ... so this is actually REALLY BAD ...

FRIDA takes up a snipers roost ... cool ...

Okay, this is getting crazy ...

A warning shot? REALLY?!!! Whooo ... but it clearly WORKS ...

Wow ... THAT is a bold bluff indeed ... FAST FRIENDS?!!! SERIOUSLY?!!! I can't believe that actually works ...

AAAAAAND now they're all going inside ...

FRIDA has WINGS?!!! Holy shit!

Oof ... this is gonna be a SQUEEZE ... and now they're just HANGING there ... oof ... oh, that was a BAD ROLL ... crap ... and that must HURT.

Oh wow ... saved by a bluff ... okay ... of course now FRIDA's clearly stuck OUTSIDE ...

Oh, this could work ... just let the robot through! OH FUCK, now Imogen's getting pulled OUT!!! CHARGE, FRIDA!!!

That was INSANELY hairy, I can't believe it actually WORKED ...

So ... this is NOT good place to be right now ...

Wow ... so there's like something REALLY nasty in here then?

Ouch ... poor kid ... CAN THEY help her?

A STATUE did this? Ooooh ... whoa, it's still here? Scary ...

The Great Beasts? None of that sounds ar all good right now ... oh boy, does that actually suggest there might be MORE THAN ONE of these things in here?

Time for a break ... okay ...

D&D Movie trailer getting me in the mood fir Saturday night ... I can't wait!

Matt: "And we're back!" Sam belches ... oh, you can just FEEL the DM's disapproval ... XD

"The power of friendship"? REALLY?!!! Oh, AND the element of surprise? Oh, well then it might work, then ...

Pass Without A Trace? Good ... FRIDA rolls a 36 on stealth? Holy fuck ...

Ah, Hamilton ... melting into George Michael ... hmmm ...

Oh shit ... is this thing like some kind of gigantic stone bull? Is that it?

Oh my fucking gods, that is so cool ... the Citadel is HANGING DOWN from the CEILING if the cavern! Awesome!

So there are still people here ... great ...

Yup, I was right. GIANT FUCKING BULL. Yikes. And it's strangely ethereal? It gets worse ...

And it's looking at them ... crap ...

Aren't they all talking awful loud for folk who are trying to be stealthy right now?

They're gonna try and READ about what this thing is ... yeah, that's gonna work.

And now it's back in the Citadel. Okay ... time to evacuate the survivors ... and they're all some very selfish bastards ain't they? Typical. And now they're all being noisy too ... oof ...

Guardian of Faith? Cool ... cute little mini Dawnfather avatar. Awwwwww ...

Into the Citadel, then ... and it's a fucking maze in here. With a bull monster ... huh, Labyrinth, cute ...

Throne room, okay ... and there it is.

Imogen tries to sense its thoughts ... hmmm ... it is WEIRD, purely emotional ... so this thing is just CONFUSED, it sounds like. Interesting.

Is there a plaque? Oh my god THERE IS ONE!!! But it's in elvish ... CRAP.

Fearne is seriously suggesting Imogen try PETTING IT. Right ...

Oh ... that was INCREDIBLY bad timing ...

Gloomscale Breastplate? Sweet.

Trying to creep in ... with really crap stealth rolls ... bugger ...

ROLL INITIATIVE!!!

Oooh ... another sweet Battlemap! And ZEE BOOL is there! It's all sleak and shiny! And BIG!!!

Shit, the Bull goes FIRST?!!! Crap ... and it just charges STRAIGHT into Fearne ...

That protective thing would have been SO COOL, such a shame the rules are MEAN right now ...

Oh fuck that is A LOT OF DICE ... 42 points of damage? OH GODS ... AND she goes flying back 20 feet! Ouch!

Deanna manages to deflect the back-kick but she's STILL driven onto her back ... oof ...

Dominate Beast? Go Fearne! Please nake this work ... Holy shit, Matt rolled an 8? It counts as a CELESTIAL?!!! Ooooooh ... Holy fuck, it WORKS!!!! They have one minute where it's just docile ... cool ... time to do ... SOMETHING ...

Fearne starts PETTING the bloody thing. Crazy.

FRIDA finds its heart and sets up for a killshot fir the moment it's NOT charmed ...ruthless!

FCG casts Tongues ... okay ... here we go ...

Ah yes ... send it to Wall Street ... XD cute ...

I love that Fearne gets an advantage on Animal Handling because she's Fearne ... LOL

It speaks! Sort of ... it really is just lost and confused and doesn't know WHY it's here ... wild ...

Yup, it's definitely MALE ...

Deanna reads the plaque ... "in memory of Molaesmyr"? Hmmmmmm ... that's entirely useless right now.

Wow ... this might actually GENUINELY be working ...

Oh thank the gods ... that Nat1 could hsvd been SO BAD ...

Dominate Beast is gone ... but it's calm now ... it wants to be shown how to get out ... hmmm ...

Umudara ... cool ...

Seriously, they need to clear a path for them yo get out without trouble ... OH!!! The Gusrdian! Yes! Try that!

A Nat1? NOOOOOOOO!!!

Okay, it might still work ... Imogen and FCG go ahead to warn them about all of this ... okay ... now communicating through the gate ...

Yeah ...this is gonna take a BIG persuasion check ... 29? Fuck ...

I can't believe this ACTUALLY works ... Calm Emotions? On TWO HUNDRED soldiers? Hmmm ... Matt rolls a 2? Wow ...

FCG: "It's the power of friendship! We just talked to it!"

David Bowie ... wait, so this guard is LITERALLY Jareth! I love it! XD

Oh my gods ... Fearne is tying a fucking RIBBON around its neck to make it look cute ... and it LETS HER!!! OMFG!!!

This is one truly BIZARRE entourage ...

Travis: "This thing killed Carl!" XD

And now it's turning into this whole bizarre event as they parade through the city ... this is CRAZY!!! Still can't believe it's STILL working ...

I mean honestly this us actually turning into something quite beautiful. Nice ...

So they're going to direct it to the Savalirwood? Cool ...

Meanwhile Chetney's still in the Palace throne room ... hmmm ... and he is stripping anything he can from the throne. Of course he is ...

Chetney shreds himself as a cover before going down into the secret passage ... it's a hidden escape! Nice ... so he uses it as intended! XD

Nat1 on a stealth check? Oof ... at least he's a bloody mess so he just BRAZENS his way out of getting caught ... XD

Nice place to end ... and that wasn't even a battle! Nice way to circumvent any real combat, guys!

"Power of friendship!" Holy fuck YES!!! LOL ... yes it really was ...

#critical role #crit role campaign 3 #crit role spoilers #campaign 3 spoilers #campaign 3 episode 53 #matt mercer #marisha ray #laudna #travis willingham #chetney pock o'pea #laura bailey #imogen temult #liam o'brien #orym of the air ashari #ashley johnson #taliesin jaffe #ashton greymoore #sam riegel #fresh cut grass #aabria iyengar #deanna #deanna critical role #christian navarro #f.r.i.d.a.

[asterkiss]

This fanart by @miragexd is so cute that I wrote a oneshot inspired by it:-

Why is Bill in human form? Why is he hanging out with the group? Who knows, this is a drabble so I don’t need to go into that backstory. :p

- COLD EMBRACE

If Mabel had to pick between her favourite season, she would probably say summer after some consideration.

Afterall, summer had flowers, smoothies, trips to the beach, and cute boys in swimming trunks.

That last one was very important as it had given her a prime excuse to see Bill shirtless at the pool earlier this year and had been the first initial step upon the mental ordeal of a mountain that was realising her feelings for the demon.

—She still wasn’t entirely at the top yet. A girl needed more than six months to grapple with the internal realisation of holding feelings for Bill Cipher.

Bluh, she always chose the challenges, didn’t she?

Currently, the brunette was wandering through the woods near the Shack as snow fell from the sky and coated the landscape in a pristine white blanket. She and Dipper had decided to visit all their friends in Gravity Falls for the holidays this year and were currently enjoying their first week of three.

It was also a chance to visit Bill, who was squatting at the Shack until the unforeseeable future.

...Who was tagging along with her right now.

Mabel looked down at her feet as she crunched through the snow, enjoying the sensation of making tracks in the otherwise untouched snow. Dipper had gone off on “not a date” with Pacifica so she’d been left by herself. Not one to stay idle, the teenager had decided to wander off and make some snow angels.

But then Bill had followed her.

And what should have been a short walk a few feet past the treelines had become a lot further and longer as she kept striding on so as to avoid looking back at him.

At least she could blame her red cheeks on the cold.

‘Oi, Shooting Star, where the hell are we going?’

She faltered at the abrupt voice, realising they were by now pretty deep into the woods.  Ah. ‘Uh,  here!’

‘Here?’

Mabel span on her heel and flashed him with a wide smile she hoped appeared genuine. ‘Yeah, here!’

Bill stared at her with keen golden eyes. ‘…This is a ditch.’

She faltered, averting her gaze quickly. Had his eyes always been that scrutinising or was she imagining it? This was probably the first time she’d actually made eye contact with him since arriving.

‘Okay, you’re acting weird,’ Bill said gruffly, folding his arms. ‘You have since the moment you landed in town, what are you hiding? Did you go and get married off to some other supernatural creature again?’

She pouted. ‘No.’ Jeez, you almost marry a herd of gnomes once and you never hear the end of it.

‘Then what?’

‘I’m not acting weird,’ she retorted before jabbing a gloved finger in his direction. ‘You’re the weird one.’

‘I’m an ancient and immortal all-powerful demon parading around in a human body whilst wearing a fluffy parka and earmuffs, of course I’m fucking weird.’

Fair point.

‘And I know a liar when I see one, so fess up.’

She internally groaned. ‘It’s nothing, just drop it. Girls are allowed to have secrets.’

‘Not when it means you can’t even look me in the eye, kid. Jeez, you’re treating me like I killed your pet pig. I haven’t tried that since last year!’

She frowned, eyes sliding in his direction. He had been making a real an effort to act nicer. It was part of the reason she’d ended up liking him before she realised it.

‘Yeah, that’s my chest. My eyes are up here.’

Mabel huffed as she finally raised her gaze up to meet his stare. There were those piercing honey eyes again that she could get lost in. She swallowed thickly.

Bill arched an eyebrow. ‘So? What’s up?’

Her lips parted, struggling to find her voice as she considered actually being honest. What was the worst that could happen? He laughed in her face and made fun of her and told the entire town she had a big fat crush on him?

—On second thoughts, nope. She shook her head frantically.

‘Urgh, you’re so frustrating sometimes,’ Bill muttered, rolling his eyes. ‘Good luck to your next boyfriend.’

Mabel scowled at that, stomping her foot as she glared. ‘As if I’d ever ask you out!’

‘What?’

Mabel blinked. ‘What?’

They stared at one another.

Bill regarded her with confusion, blinking owlishly as her abrupt words sunk in. ‘Wait a second…’

Meanwhile, Mabel felt panic clawing up her throat as she registered what she’d just said and the implications it could lead to. She didn’t like that look of dawning realisation beginning to cross his face.

Time to abort. Mabel out.

‘Bye!’

She turned on her heel and fled.

‘What- hey wait a second!’

Mabel ignored him, skidding partially in the snow as she legged it. Nope, nope, nope.

‘Shooting Star!’ he yelled, voice echoing through the trees as she continued to rush ahead. She leapt over a fallen log in her haste and landed on the snowy ground past it. ‘Look out for the—!’

The rest of Bill’s words were lost as Mabel fell through the ice and plummeted into the lake.

The freezing water instantly soaked her clothing, the cold seeping through her skin and penetrating her bones. She quickly scrambled to escape, her head breaking through the surface as the cold air hit her wet skin. However, she only managed one gulp of air before her sodden winter coat weighed her down again and dragged her under.

Oh no, no, no, no.

Alarm swelled inside her, heart slamming against her chest before something grabbed her by the shoulder and yanked her out of the frozen lake. She spluttered out water as she found herself tossed on the shore, her entire body shivering whilst the teen gulped in greedy breaths of air. She’d only been in the water for less than ten seconds, but it felt like forever as adrenaline continued to course through her body.

‘You…. You sure know how to break the ice,’ Bill breathed from beside her. Mabel slowly raised her head to find him sat panting heavily beside her as he clutched a hand over his chest. He was a demon, so he didn’t get out of breath which meant his current reaction was the result of pure panic and stress.

Mabel swallowed, teeth chattering as she tried to speak. ‘Th-Thanks.’ For not letting her drown a terrifying watery death.

Bill glanced aside at her, still breathing erratically and she found herself frozen for an entirely different reason beneath that gaze of his once again.

His eyes swept over her for a second before he spoke. ‘Take your clothes off.’

‘Wha-!’ Her face flushed, some heat creeping back into her cheeks although the rest of her body remained like ice.

‘Your clothes are soaked, you need to get out of ‘em,’ he snapped, shooting her a fierce look. ‘Lose the oversized coat and get over here.’

He looked so commanding and she felt so cold that she didn’t question him. She shifted onto her knees and tried to unzip her winter coat but her hands were trembling so bad that she could barely get a hold. In the end Bill grunted and leaned forward towards her. She blinked at the proximity of their faces, though he didn’t seem to notice as his gaze remained rooted down as he grasped her zip. He yanked it down in one swift motion that made her squirm for some reason before he leaned away and allowed her to pull her arms out of the thing. It instantly dropped to the floor like a dead weight, and Mabel hugged herself as she now found herself in nothing but a sweater and jeans.

Bill leaned back, offering a hand. ‘Now here.’

Were they going to go back to the Shack? She reached out and accepted his hand, fingers lacing with his before he abruptly tugged her forward into his lap. She let out a small yelp of surprise, scrambling as she found herself on top of him.

‘Oh my god, will you quit squirming?’ he growled, and in the next moment Mabel found her back pressed against his chest as he wrapped his coat around her shivering frame. She hadn’t even realised he’d unzipped his own clothing. She blinked as she processed the fact she was sitting in Bill’s lap. Sitting in his lap whilst he hugged her.

Oh my.

‘W-What are you doing?’

‘Preventing you from turning into an ice cube,’ he drawled, his chin resting atop her head. ‘I think you’ll find as a demon I’m quite warm.’

That he was. Confined between his body and the inner fur lining of his coat, Mabel found she suddenly didn’t feel so cold with her personal demon-shaped hot water bottle. Or perhaps that was because her face and chest felt flushed from how much of Bill’s body was pressed against hers.

‘Oh good, your body’s already warming up.’

‘You can tell?’

‘Yup, I’m a demon. It’s why I’m good at picking out liars.’

Oh.

Part of her wanted to ask why they weren’t returning to the Shack, after all shouldn’t they be getting her indoors? But she rather liked their current position and wasn’t in a rush to disrupt it. Even if it did mean possibly getting a slight case of hypothermia.

He hummed. ‘By the way, Shooting Star?’

‘Yeah?’

‘Next time you confess, try not to run off immediately after.’

Mabel blinked at that. Next time? Was he saying he wanted there to be a next time? His grip on her tightened and she swore she could feel his own heart pounding away through his chest against her.

Rather than question it and ruin this moment she instead managed a small nod as she leaned against the demon and relished in their closeness. ‘Okay,’ she whispered, eyes fluttering closed. ‘I won’t.’

Unbeknownst to her, the demon smiled warmly.

After that, Mabel decided winter was her favourite season. No particular reason. Just cuz.

#mabill #miragexd #oneshot