#fuck gen z: i thought you guys were pretty cool at first but now you’re the biggest hypocrites and assholes
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all i’m gonna say is: be careful who you share these things with and also, go fuck yourselves.
how fucking dare all of you to smear this man and a private conversation he had with someone and make up bullshit about him.
also, the post i made earlier still holds true, too: there’s a huge, and admittedly very disgusting, double standard going about with today’s young people. it’s empowering for a girl to pose partially nude on a magazine or an instagram photo but heaven forbid an older guy make friends with a young fan.
you should be ashamed of yourselves.
#david ellefson#megadeth#fuck gen z: i thought you guys were pretty cool at first but now you’re the biggest hypocrites and assholes#and enablers too: you enable this double standard#text#thrash metal#rant
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Searching for Answers: Alex and Jake the Shelter Guy
CW: Pet whump as a setting (Box Boy universe). References to dehumanization, brief vague reference to torture and noncon. If you’ve ever read @deluxewhump‘s excellent work (if you haven’t, you should be), you’ll see a very familiar face.
Jake takes naps between classes.
He spends three days a week at school taking 18 credit hours, in class from 8 in the morning until 10:30 at night. Then he heads to Nat’s place and does the overnight-house-worker thing, giving the rescues a sense of security knowing somebody familiar and safe is there if they have bad dreams or need help. The other four days a week he works with Natalie Yoder and Dr. Masood, learning about the rescues and how to help them.
It sounds exciting, being a college student secretly part of an underground liberation movement, but mostly it’s just exhausting.
He’s going to graduate with a degree in public health and a double-minor in communications and philosophy. It looks stupid, on the surface, he guesses, but he’s got a plan. Advocacy for runaways and human pets, working towards getting this country to a place to consider a full legal liberation and adjustment period for every person trapped in the system.
Public health, so he can stand as an advocate with the degree to back up his hands-on experience and knowledge. Communications, to make him a better advocate by giving him the tools to understand how to utilize the media to change the way human pets are seen. Philosophy, to give him the skills to dig deeply into the thought processes around human pet ownership.
The movement’s got more than 75 years of entrenched prejudice to undo. One day, he’s one hundred percent certain, pet ownership is going to be abolished as the fucking crime against humanity it really is.
Jake wants to be a part of the group that finally makes it happen.
The only problem is that he’s set himself an impossible schedule, and he’s so tired some days it’s all he can do to stay awake through his classes. He sleeps like four hours a night, and one day that’s going to catch up to him in a big way, but for now… he naps on benches and in courtyards, naps in the teacher’s lounge in the English department and behind a bunch of bookshelves in the philosophy hallway.
It’s nice, except for when some asshole decides not to let him.
“Hey, uh, you’re… Jake Stanton, right?”
Jake groans, rubbing at his temple as he sits back and rests his back against the crumbling old brick wall of the oldest building on campus. He squints up at the fucking frat boy looking down at him. Not that Jake’s ever seen him before, but it’s easy to tell one of the fratbrats when you see them.
He’s got the look - super clean-cut, blond hair and blue eyes, he’s even got a square jaw. Maybe not as musclebound as some of the other ones, but he’s still unmistakable. He looks kind of familiar, too, but that’s kind of the problem with frat guys. They mostly dress enough alike that it’s kind of hard to tell if he’s had a class with them or just had a class with one of their brothers.
The guy looks nervous as hell.
“Yeah, I’m Jake. Do I know you?”
“Uh, probably… prob’ly you do.” The frat guy shifts uneasily, one hand gripped tightly onto the backpack slung over one shoulder, a couple of textbooks under the other arm. “I’m Alex. We’re both minoring in, uh, philosophy, I think?”
“Oh, yeah.” Jake pushes back a yawn, just barely covering it with one hand. “Yeah, okay. I thought you looked familiar. What can I do for you? I’m sorry in advance if you wanted help with the essay thing, I haven’t even started on it, I’ve been busy with work.”
Nat’s newest charge had nonstop fucking nightmares from training, night after night. Jake had barely gotten a wink of sleep.
“No, that’s okay, I, uh-... actually I’d be good to help you, if you need it. I finished mine, ran it by our-... my buddy last night.” Jake blinks, squinting again. He could swear Alex the Frat Guy is blushing. “Um. I just. I heard from, from some people that you’re… that you… know stuff.” Alex’s voice drops, into something just above a whisper. “About, uh, you know. Pets. Box Boys.”
Jake stiffens, as his chest goes a little cold. “Who told you that?” He doesn’t talk about it much - being openly part of the pet lib movement isn’t exactly dangerous, but nobody talks pet liberation in polite company.
“Um. This girl I know. Meghan Jensen-” Alex pronounces the h, just a little, Meg-hen, and Jake can’t quite keep himself from smiling. “-she’s in a sorority… we kind of partner with sometimes… she said she heard from her twin sister Hannah who’s into some, like, punk underground lib shit… that you were, um. Someone I could talk to. For advice.”
Jake nods, slowly, giving himself time to process the words. He knows who Hannah Jensen is, he’s seen her at some of the group meetings and protests. He knows she has a twin who’s in a sorority, too. If this Alex guy is fucking with him, he did way too much research first. “Yeah, okay. Not out here, though, all right?”
Alex nods, expression going solemn and uncertain. “We can’t, like… get arrested just for talking about it, can we? I definitely can’t have that on my, like, record.”
Jake wants to laugh, but then he sees that the guy’s serious. Probably all he’s seen is the company propaganda shit about theft of property and consent and everything. It’s fake enough that no millenial or Gen Z person’s going to fall for it, but it’s still basically everywhere you look. Hard to make too many inroads against everyone’s assumptions about the system without someone who knows how to work it.
Hence - public health, communications, and philosophy.
“No, we won’t get arrested for talking. But someone might follow me home.” Jake makes his voice light and joking, even though it’s a genuine concern, and pushes himself to his feet. He’s actually a little taller than Alex, and more muscled-up, too.
“I just… need help. With, um. Someone I know.”
Jake blinks, thrown off-guard. “Someone specific?” Then it clicks, and he groans. “Shit. You’re with the frat, aren’t you? I’ve heard of you guys, you’ve got the guy going into the NFL. You’re one of those assholes that bought one-”
“Look, it seemed like… I didn’t really think about it, okay?” Alex’s face is even redder now, but he looks half-miserable with it, embarrassed and ashamed. Like Jake had caught him dealing drugs at an elementary school playground. “He’s… I just wanted to ask you some stuff about things I’ve noticed about him… and about Box Boys, and…”
“Why don’t you call the fucking company, Alex? They come with a number on their fucking brochure.” Jake’s voice goes dark, and he sees Alex bristle defensively. “Right there on the back, when you buy a human being. Customer service for your personal slave.”
“Hey, back the fuck off.” Alex’s eyes narrow, and he moves closer into Jake’s space, glaring at him. “Look, we went in on the whole thing together, and now I’ve gotten to know him, and I just-... I’m, um. I’m worried, and… I needed someone to talk to.”
Jake wants to push back again, to push harder. To ask Alex what the fuck he was thinking, being part of a group buying a human being. If he thought it’d be funny, or if he just cracked under peer pressure. But it won’t help, and instead he takes a deep breath, remembering Nat’s words. One step, one conversation, one person at a time. We can change the story, but you have to change minds and hearts, first. “... yeah, okay. Okay, I get it. Yeah. I can talk to you. I’m sorry, I just-”
“No, I get it,” Alex says, quickly, backing up again. “I get it. I probably look like a total rat-bastard to you.”
“No… not really. But if you’re, uh. Look, there’s a place I meet people sometimes to talk about this. I’ll buy you a drink and we’ll talk there.”
“Yeah, okay. That sounds cool.”
“What’s your major, anyway?” Jake asks, sliding his own backpack on, eyes scanning over the campus. He’s met so many rescues who should be walking around college like this, safe and easy and free. He’s met a few that he’s pretty sure were walking around places like this, before WRU picked them up. “I feel like you were really good at arguing in Intro to Philosophy. So… something public-speaking-focused, right?”
“Uh, Poli Sci,” Alex says, falling into step beside him as Jake makes his way down the dirt path made by tens of thousands of students over the course of decades simply choosing to ignore the paved sidewalks and make their own way.
“Yeah, that makes sense.”
“What? Why do you say that?”
“You look like a baby politician, and you’re good at arguing. What else would you be here for?” Alex snorts, hunching his shoulders a little defensively as his sneaker scrapes along the ground, and Jake sighs. “Sorry, man. I didn’t really mean that as an insult. I’m just tired as shit and everything’s been coming out the wrong way today. It really has not been my day.”
There’s a headache pounding behind his eyes, the fuzzy-headed exhaustion that could easily take him over. But he tells himself the rescues - and the Box Boys and Box Babes still in captivity - have it so much worse than he does.
That gives him a little more energy to keep walking.
“No, it’s okay. If I want to go into politics I should probably look like a politician, right?” Alex flashes him a hint of a smile, sidelong, and Jake relaxes. Okay, Alex the Frat Guy’s not as bad as he thought he’d be.
They end up chatting pretty amicably about professors and TAs they liked and hated in their shared philosophy courses, homework, and Alex laughs at Jake’s surprise, finding out that only a few of his frat brothers are even in sports as part of their long-term goal. Alex mentions a ‘Zee’ a few times, and eventually Jake realizes he’s talking about the Box Boy his frat bought, not just another frat brother or friend.
He doesn’t talk about the Box Boy like he’s just an object to be owned. Jake wonders why he went in on the purchase at all. Probably, he decides, peer pressure. Everyone does stupid shit because of peer pressure. Jake smoked for a while in high school. His friend Krista got the worst haircut Jake had ever seen. Maybe Alex’s stupid peer pressure thing was buying a fucking person.
Nope. He has to stop being so bitter about it. It’s just part of being in a subculture - and like it or not, being against pet ownership is way more of a minority, right now, than being either neutral or in favor of it.
If he carries all this anger back to the shelter tonight, the rescues will pick up on the tension, on his unhappiness. They’re all experts at reading the slightest negative change in mood, and while not all of them panic, they will all start trying to fix it in whatever way they understand. Jake definitely doesn’t have the energy to deal with a handful of recovering pets trying to clean or cook or screw their way out of danger.
He walks Alex to the Student Center while the conversation is still safely focused on surface level stuff, grabbing himself and and Alex both iced coffees before he heads downstairs. Alex seems like he knows every third person they see. Jake can’t decide if that’s some weird politician-to-be gladhanding, or if he genuinely just has a really good memory for faces and names.
He has to stop being so bitter about politics, too - not everyone’s going to be Senator Carlotta Grant, after all. Maybe Alex will be one of the good guys, for real.
Maybe Jake can help nudge him that direction, if he wasn’t already headed that way.
The basement has a bunch of space for students, too, but Jake can count on his hands the amount of people he’s ever seen here over the course of his entire collegiate career. There’s a small booth where a bored girl with long black hair is ostensibly selling jewelry and pottery, a small open area with a piano that has a thin film of dust, and Jake leads an increasingly nervous Alex all the way to the back, where a series of hard wooden booths are built into the walls around an open hardwood floor. It’s dim down here, and dark as hell. Jake likes to call it the Speakeasy - to himself, at least. That’s what it reminds him of, speakeasies in Hollywood movies.
“I’ve never been down here,” Alex says, slightly hushed. “I didn’t even know this existed.”
“Yeah, it’s like… everyone just collectively decides to ignore this part of the Student Center. Works for me. We have meetings down here sometimes. Plus, the fact that nobody knows about it means nobody is gonna give us a hard time about whatever you’re going to tell me.”
Jake slides into a booth and Alex sits across from him, the both of them slipping their backpacks off. It feels sort of hilariously surreal, like they’re in a movie about spies or the only two people who know the truth at the beginning of a zombie movie.
Alex pulls out his cell phone, nervously fiddling with it and staring down. The silence draws slowly out until Jake finally leans over. Alex’s blue eyes jump up to his. “Look. The answer is yes, I, uh. I do some stuff with pet lib groups now and then. If you’re looking for info on, like, how to donate and shit, I’ve got some papers in my backpack with stuff you can do to help the movement… we could really use some clothing donations and, like, canned food and stuff right now-”
“No, um. I mean, yeah, I’ll… I’ll ask around and see if any of the guys have clothes they don’t need, but… that’s not… what I want to ask about.”
Jake frowns, then asks, softly, “Are you looking to help him get out of the system? Your Box Boy, at your frat house?”
There’s a pause. Alex goes wide-eyed, like he hadn’t even thought of it. “No! I mean. Not, um. I don’t think he’d want to… I just wanted to… to ask. Some stuff. About, um. How to help him act more like, uh, like a person. Like, if I take him out or whatever.”
Jake’s headache is getting worse.
“You want me to give you advice on how to train him?” He can’t stop the jagged edge that creeps into his voice. “So that you can, what-... hide what he is and take your pet around without having to answer any questions about it and face up to what you did-”
“Holy shit, dude,” Alex says, sitting back and setting his phone slowly down. “You don’t need to get so mad about it. I didn’t mean-”
“Well, what did you mean? Look, I do a lot of work with the kinds of people who get bought. I’m sorry if that freaks you out or something, but… you should see the damage this whole system does, you know?”
Alex is quiet, for a long time, just staring at him. It’s hard to tell what he’s thinking - he’s already got that way of looking serious and thoughtful without actually giving anything away. Then, quietly, he says, “Zee has nightmares.”
“You call him Zee?”
“Yeah, uh. I mean, technically Z2, it’s part of his, um, official-”
“Yeah, I get it.” Jake sips his iced coffee and watches Alex hurriedly pick his up and sip, too, like he’d forgotten it was there. To Jake at least it seemed like a lifeline, a way to hold back the urge he has to grab this guy by the shoulders and shake him. “They make them answer to numbers. Dehumanization is, like, the first step of what they do.”
Alex’s face twists, like he’s tasted something awful, and he looks away. “Right. So, anyway, we all kind of decided on Z2. But… I like Zee better. It seems like it’s short for, for a real name, maybe. Like I could call him that in public and nobody, nobody would know-”
“That you own him?”
“No.” Alex sits up straighter. “No, not exactly. I figure it’d make it easier for him. I don’t-... I don’t really care what people think about me-”
“If you’re going into politics, you’re definitely going to care what people think of you.”
“Look, man, let me finish a sentence, okay? Just, like, single sentence?” Alex pauses, and waits, and Jake finally sits back and sips his drink again and nods, silently. Alex sighs. “Thanks. I just meant that if I call him Zee, people will talk to him like he’s a regular guy. And I think he deserves it, to be able to go out and just, like, talk to people and be normal. That’s all I meant. But, this is… you, um. You just said you work with them, right? With, um. The… ones who get away? Get freed, or whatever?”
“They don’t get freed,” Jake says flatly. “That’s a myth. They run away or they stay kept.”
“... right.” Alex frowns, looking down at his coffee again, rubbing his fingers over the condensation building up along the clear plastic. “You said you work with them? So, um. I just. I want to know how to make things better for Zee, while he lives with us.”
“Belongs to you.”
Alex groans, throwing his hands up in the air. “Fine! What is it with you, dude? I’m trying to make Zee’s life better. I can’t just, like, make him not a Box Boy. One of my brothers technically has all his paperwork, we all went in on him together, he belongs to the whole fucking frat. If it was up to me and Dom, we’d free him in a heartbeat, okay? But it’s not up to us. And I can’t figure out how to make things better for him unless I know where to even start.”
There’s real anguish in his voice, now. Actual, genuine guilt and remorse. Jake closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, calms the anger that he feels buzzing along all his nerves. It’s not Alex’s fault. He’s part of a system just like everybody else. Born into it, raised in it, no need to question or even think it through, until something hits him where he lives.
Literally, in this case.
A lot of people are paid a lot of money to make sure people like Alex don’t ask questions, don’t try to make anything different or better. A lot of people work very hard to put out marketing materials and buy TV ads and write speeches for the President all about how great and above-board and one hundred percent normal it all is.
And people like Jake are the nutjobs standing on a streetcorner wearing a sandwich board.
“Yeah,” Jake says. Just something to fill the silence, while he keeps his breathing slow and even, takes another drink. “Look, can I… can I say something?”
“Sure. I haven’t been insulted enough today, have at it.” Alex slumps back, looking almost morose, like a kid tired of being yelled at for listening to his music too loud.
“I”m not going to insult you. Uh, anymore. I just wanted to say… I’m sorry. It’s… I live it, every single day, so it’s kind of hard to remember not everybody does. I’ll help you out with some advice, but… but I’m really going to want you to set him free for us to help him, you know? Or people like us, anyway. Just… know that any advice I give you’s going to come from that direction, okay?”
Alex swallows, drawing little nonsense symbols on the tabletop with one finger, as he thinks. “... okay. Yeah.”
“Good. So you said he has nightmares?” He pauses long enough for Alex to nod. “Okay. That’s a good starting place. They all have nightmares. Fucking all of them. Got it? And I bet if you wake him up, he doesn’t even know what he was dreaming about, right?”
“Uh, yeah. Or he won’t tell me, anyway. He tried once, but he got a really bad headache and had to take some, like, Advil…”
“Which, I’m going to guess, didn’t do shit to help. It’s not a headache from actual, like, nerves… it’s a conditioning thing.”
“... the fuck is conditioning?”
Jake opens his mouth, closes it again. Then he turns and digs into his backpack, pulling out a worn, wrinkled old bit of printer paper carefully folded into a three-sided brochure. WRU and the companies have the good stuff. Nat just prints this stuff out on her home computer, and Jake and the rescues sit up folding them until they look - mostly - presentable for the public. He slides it across the table, and Alex picks it up, looking it over. There’s an old photo on the front of a woman who died back in the 90’s with two rescues standing in front of her, her hands on their shoulders, everyone smiling. It’s the best picture they have.
Nobody wants to have their photo printed, not anymore. Not since people started disappearing, sometimes.
“Read this. It’s got a little bit in it about navigating that stuff. Conditioning is like brainwashing, a little bit. It’s how they teach them to act the way they do. Like… you’ve probably noticed he can’t really say no to any chore you tell him to do, right?”
Alex swallows, hard enough for Jake to notice, and nods. He’s still got the brochure unfolded in his hands, but he looks up slowly, meeting Jake’s eyes. “Yeah. And he never gets mad, either. He just… does whatever we tell him. Even if they, uh, sometimes the others… aren’t super nice to him. And he just… takes it.”
“Right. His nightmares are probably about the reason he just sits there and takes it, Alex. If you push him - if you give him orders he can’t handle, or you tell him to do something that hurts him or he’s terrified of it or, like…” A thought flashes through Jake’s mind, one that’s so dark even he doesn’t think the frat boys would be that kind of evil, and he dismisses it. “... even if you tell him to go jump out a window, or something… he might protest or cry, but if you keep going… he’ll do it. Because, deep down, that’s all he can do anymore. Got that?”
Some of the blood has drained from Alex’s face. “And he has nightmares about, about being… taught? To do whatever we say?”
“Yeah. Look, I’m going to sound fucking crazy, I get it. But… please just trust me. I see rescues - that’s what we call the ones we take care of - every day. They all have nightmares. They all do whatever you tell them to. Some of them do worse than that. I can help you with some exercises, some therapy stuff, that we do to help calm their nightmares down. But I can’t do anything that’ll really, really help, unless you let me talk to him. Or if you get him out of that frat house.”
“I can’t do that. He doesn’t even belong to me, he belongs to all of us.” Alex’s face twists again, but Jake is more focused on the fact that Alex didn’t protest the idea of freeing the boy at all. Only argued that it would be difficult. That Jake could work with. “Technically he belongs to my frat brother, and Cam’s… um.” Alex is silent for a second, and then asks, “What do I do if someone else, like… pushes him in ways he’s not supposed to be? Like… that don’t go along with what he’s, um, what his… category or whatever is?”
“What?” At first, Jake’s confused.
Then he realizes what Alex is actually asking, and feels the anger under his skin all over again.
Closing his eyes isn’t enough this time. He thinks about the rescues he’s seen come through, all of them used in different, equally horrible ways. All of them absolutely, completely, utterly unable to even begin to refuse it. “Is it just one guy, or are there more?”
He’s surprised to hear his own voice come out soft, and even. He doesn’t even sound angry. Just mildly annoyed.
Underneath that, he’s ready to start throwing punches. This is why he doesn’t talk about this stuff at school - he’s going to miss his classes today, unable to handle it being here, too, when normally he keeps the two halves of his life separate so he can keep himself from burning out too soon. No, he’ll skip class and go straight to the shelter tonight. Get to bed earlier than usual, if the rescues are feeling good.
“Just one… I think. I mean, I hope just the one. We, uh, we talked about it with him, and I’m sure… I’m sure it won’t happen again.”
“Yeah, it will. Give someone total power over another human life and they’ll go fucknuts destroying it.”
“We’re trying to keep them apart, but… we can’t always be there. Which is why I thought, um, if I could get him to pass for, like, just another person he could maybe just go around with us more and not be in the house when we’re not…”
“Good start. I’ve got… hold on.” He digs another piece of paper out and lays it out on the table. “This one’s about ways to talk to your rescue about consent. It’s… kind of an awkward conversation and he won’t understand it. But… if you just keep talking, it’ll help him feel better standing up for himself.”
“Why doesn’t he understand cuh-... uh… consent?” Alex’s face was red again. “I mean. He wants… so much attention, and he seems like he’s used to being, like, hugged or kept around people, like he wants it. From Dom and me, at least.”
Jake swallows, trying to decide how much to tell him. How far to take this conversation. He pulls another paper, this one four sheets stapled together front and back, and lays it down on the table, too. “Have you ever been locked in a room without human contact for months on end, except to be hurt? The only good thing they get is dehumanizing shit like that - being petted, or touched against their will. It’s normalized. He doesn’t know he shouldn’t want it, anymore. And he’ll be terrified and upset if you stop.”
Alex looks down at the paper, shaking his head “Do you… do you have a paper for everything?”
“Bet your ass I do. That one’s on training methods. Turn to page two. It’ll answer your question. I have stuff in here to answer all your questions, and I have-... there’s a, uh. A friend of mine… I could bring to talk to you, if you’re interested. A rescue who’s… mostly… better now. He’s our IT guy. He’s been through all the counseling, and he remembers training and all of it. He can tell you what your, uh. What Zee has gone through. Ways to help him break it. But… that’s only if you want. I get that I’m throwing a lot at you. And I get that it probably seems crazy-”
“No, it doesn’t. Really.” Alex leans over, looking at him earnestly, one hand over the papers Jake has set down on the table between them. “Look, before I met Zee, I would maybe have thought… it was all exaggerated, but… but I’ve listened to him when he sleeps. He sounds so… terrified. And he’s so grateful for… everything. Anything nice, literally the smallest nice things… I don’t think you’re crazy, I think… think like, maybe… maybe I need to try and help him get out of our house before I graduate, I just have no idea where to start.”
“I can give you an address,” Jake says, softly.
“Uh… no. I don’t think he’d… want to do that.”
“Not yet. But it’s what a lot of them do, when they’re ready.”
“No, I get that, but I just. Um. I don’t think I’d… want him to be, like, homeless? Just without anybody? That seems really… awful, actually.”
“Does it?” Jake raises an eyebrow. “Does it seem worse than, I don’t know, cleaning frat guy toilets? Or whatever awful shit you’re almost telling me about your frat brother? Does he even have a bed?”
Alex looks back out into the dim basement corner, tapping his fingers on the table. His discomfort is basically a physical weight around him in the air. “No. He, uh. There’s this… closet, or he stays with Dom or me…”
“Yeah. So. Does that seem better than an address where I can guarantee a bed?”
“No… it doesn’t… I guess.” Alex glances down at his coffee, apparently surprised to discover he’s been drinking it the whole time and it’s all gone. He takes the lid off and picks out a piece of ice, crunching it between his teeth. The sound is enormously loud in the quiet, empty space. “I just feel like… we care about Zee. I think I can do better than, um, whatever you’re suggesting. I just… need your help, to do better. He… deserves better.”
“Yeah. He does. They all do.”
Alex takes a deep breath and turns back to him, folding his hands together on the table, looking for all the world like the senator or congressman or whatever he’s planning to maybe one day be. He leans slowly over and looks Jake right in the eyes “I want all your papers from your bag. Just… the whole library. I don’t want to, to send him away. I think he’d… it’d hurt him, so badly. He really likes us, and we… we’re trying. But I want to know how to do better.”
Jake stares right back. He can’t tell if Alex really means it, or not, but he sounds like he means it. Finally, he turns and digs another stack of papers out, maybe a hundred different pages all total. He always keeps some on him, just in case, but nobody ever really asks. He lets the stack fall a couple of inches in front of Alex, watching his eyes widen as he stares.
“There it is,” Jake says. “The whole damn library. All the reading you could ever want on why the pet system is bullshit, what they’re doing to make you think it’s okay, and how to help someone who’s been trapped in it. If you and, uh, your frat brother, or-... or Zee wants to meet with my friend Nine, I can introduce you. Only when you’re ready. I’m on campus Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday basically all day. I can talk to you whenever. My number’s… hold on.” He grabs another piece of paper out and scribbles his number down, hands that over, too. “Call me if you want to talk more, on those three days. The rest of the time I work with the rescues, and I’m not gonna answer my phone unless someone died or you’re my dad.”
Alex nods, and shoves the whole pile of papers into his own backpack, zipping it carefully up. “Thanks. Hey, can I ask you something?”
Jake lets out a sigh. He knows what the question is going to be, too. It’s the same question, every time, and they always save it for the end of the conversation. “Yeah, go for it.”
Alex pauses, then asks, “Is it true you know Vincent Shield?”
Jake huffs a little bitter laughter. They always ask, every single time.
“Yeah, I do. And he’s a dick.”
#whump#box boy#box boy universe#featuring deluxewhump's alex#deluxewhump#crossover#other people's ocs#my ocs#z2#frat house boxboy#frathouse box boy#alex#tw: referenced dehumanization#tw: referenced pet whump#jake the shelter guy
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Who’s Fext? || Luce and Winston
As weird as it was being at a high school alumni event, Winston had to admit that at least Luce was there. She was cool. All the Vurals were. In their own way. If they had been forced to go through something like this alone then they weren’t sure that they would’ve come out of it entirely sane. They were dressed appropriately for the event. Just office wear really, a shirt and trousers, a jacket, sneakers, a hoodie, okay maybe they could’ve made more of an effort. But this was something that they were doing to keep their mother happy, rather then because they really wanted to. “Thank god,” Winston said as they headed out of the hall where the event had taken place, “I wasn’t sure that I could take another “have you ever shot a gun?” question if my life depended on it.”
Why the high school had wanted her here was beyond Luce. She didn’t think that “tattoo artist at a local shop” ranked all that highly on the list of things that would inspire kids to stay in school. But, she’d spent her day in the art classes, talking to kids about what she did and how her classes had helped prepare her for her career. Which was objectively a lie-- what she’d learned as an apprentice was what had made her successful. But, they didn’t need to know that. Plus, it was good to see Winston here. She’d spent the last five years living out in her cabin, very deliberately avoiding other people. But, it wasn’t bad seeing the neighbor kid again. “You could have just lied. Would have been fun to see the teacher just go wide-eyed and pull the plug on the whole thing.” Luce said with a grin. “I straight up just told the kids that I dropped out of college a semester in.” SHe said as they walked down the hall together.
Laughing Winston couldn’t help but imagine what the AV club kids -- or whatever the current Gen Z equivalent was -- would say if they tried to claim that they had dropped out of college. “I don’t know if it would work as well for me if I tried to lie about dropping out of college or anything like that, if anything I think that they would know that there is no way that I can actually make it anywhere meaningful in my career without college.” They shuffled their feet as they made their way through the corridors of their old high school. High school hadn’t been the best, and they didn’t exactly miss it. Winston hadn’t really found their feet till college and at that point it was nice that they could put high school well behind them. “Besides, I think I’m still too hard wired to be a good student to fuck with a teacher like that. They probably don’t want to be here either.”
“That’s a good point. Your whole deal requires a lot of studying and shit.” Luce said with a nod. Winston had always been good at that sort of thing-- they’d pretty much grown up together, their interests in tech stuff had gone a long way back. “I figured. But, this is why you’re the one with the internship with WCPD. You’re good and law abiding like that.” Stretching, the material of her flannel shirt rubbed against her forearms in an almost suffocating way. She’d figured it wouldn’t have been a great idea to roll up in her usual outfit-- leather jacket, tank, and jeans-- so she’d worn a flannel under her usual jacket. It didn’t hide the tattoos on her hands, but the art teacher had known who she was inviting when she’d extended the offer. As they walked down the empty hallways, Luce glanced down one of the corridors, a smirk growing on her face. “Hey. Do you remember Mr. Blume? Taught chemistry? Wanna pop by and see if he’s still teaching here?”
“I mean, it is all just practice, just a different way of practicing to the work that you do. Besides, my kind of practicing is a lot less permanent then yours, I don’t know if I would have the nerve to give someone a tattoo, I’d be terrified of fucking up.” Winston swallowed at the thought, imagining how angry they would be if someone gave them a bad tattoo. How did people work their way around something like that? They knew that they definitely didn’t have the spine for it. “Wow, am I that easy to read?” Winston asked with a shake of their head, they tugged at the rolled up sleeves of the shirt they had worn today, wishing that they had taken a leaf out of Luce’s book and dressed more casually. A t-shirt would’ve been more comfortable. AS they moved down the corridors and headed towards the classrooms which were called ‘labs’ they found themselves nodding. “Oh hell yeah, I loved Mr. Blume, he was like the best teacher that they had in this place, is he still around?” Winston made their way down the corridors, in some ways it was like nothing at all had changed. Things seemed to be mostly the same and yet they were different. “Think he’s got the same classroom?”
“That’s why there’s a three year apprenticeship. You practice on oranges for a long time, then pig skin, then yourself.” Luce said, rolling up her sleeves and showing them a faded and honestly kind of shitty crescent moon she had on the inside of her wrist. It was far from her best work, but she kept it as a reminder of how far she’d come in the last few years. “You just work until you’re too good to fuck up.” She said with an easy shrug. “And, you’re only easy to read cuz we grew up together, goofball.” Luce teased. As the two walked down the hall, she couldn’t help but smile a bit wistfully. High school hadn’t been too bad for her, honestly. She’d had to deal with being known as “Bea’s Little Sister” for a while, but by the time Nell and Winston got to high school, she’d carved out her own little niche in the art wing. “He might. I just remember blowing shit up when we learned about combustion reactions. That was fun.” She said with a smile.
“Three years of training so that I could potentially ruin someone’s skin permanently,” Winston chuckled and shrugged, “I don’t think after all of that I would trust myself to do a really good job. But then again I was never the artist that you were.” They glanced at the tattoo and raised an eyebrow. “Damn, you actually did tattoo yourself, that must have been a weird experience.” Luce really seemed to be in her element when it came to tattoos and Winston was kind of impressed. “True, I think when you’ve known a family as long as the Dane’s and Vural’s have known each other then you really get good at reading people, I know exactly what it means when your mom purses her lips. You know how she does.” Winston hadn’t loved high school, they’d not exactly been popular and they’d had friends but they’d also had … well not friends. “He once dropped a tiny bit of sodium straight into a puddle for the class, I don’t think that the janitor ever forgave him for it,” they strutted down the corridor and paused outside of his classroom, peering through the little square window of glass set into the door, Winston spotted him working at the desk at the front of the class. “Hey, he’s in there, you wanna say hi?”
“Eh. It’s all about practice. Some people might start with talent, but that doesn’t mean shit compared to consistent practice.” Luce said, a hint of humor in her tone. That statement could be applied to magic as well. Bea had always been the focus of their parent’s attention, the first born, the one with the flare their parents were looking for. But talent didn’t measure ability. At the mention of her mother, Luce full body shuddered, shaking her head at the mere thought. “You’re not wrong in the slightest.” She agreed. Yet another quote-unquote benefit of living with her sisters… their mothers increased ability to meddle in her life. She fucking hated it. At least when she was in the woods, she’d had some physical distance to keep her family out of her life. Laughing, she grinned at Winston. “That sounds just like him. He is? Shit, yeah, let’s go in there.” Pulling open the door, Luce grinned and waved a hand. “Hey there, Mr. Blume. Still kicking huh?”
“I guess it’s like a musical instrument, the more that you work on it the more confident you are, but also the more able to deal with unexpected shit you are able to be… though I hope with tattoos you don’t often have to deal with any surprises.” Winston laughed gently at the idea of a surprise arising during a tattooing session. That wouldn’t be ideal. Obviously. “It’s nice that you’re back around, I know you had to do your time in the woods and stuff, but it’s cool to actually see you and Nell and Bea more now, there were a couple of years when I was in college and Nell was travelling, kinda felt like you guys were on a different planet you know.” The Vural family had always been beyond good to Winston and they would never forget that goodness. They had given them a lot and they would do whatever they needed to feel as if they were on equal footing once more. Following Luce into the classroom, Winston waved as well. “Hey Mr. Blume, can’t believe you’re still stuck here right…” they fell silent as Mr. Blume’s eyes snapped up and locked with Winston’s leaving a chill to trickle down their spine as they realised something was wrong, “you okay Mr. Blume?”
“Yep, pretty much. Eh,” Luce paused, thinking about the strange walk-in tattoo that she’d just done the other day. “There are some surprises that can happen. Usually just people saying they’re ‘totally fine’ and then passing out on me. When you decide to get a tattoo, just be honest with your artist.” She advised. At their mention of the time when the family was spread all over the place, Luce’s joking expression wavered for a moment. If Winston thought they were on a different planet then, then call her a fucking astronaut. She’d rather be back in her cabin than living with Bea and Nell. She’d had an entire place to herself, now she had a room and a shed. A great shed, but still a shed. As soon as the two of them stepped closer, Luce’s eyes narrowed, the hair on the back of her neck standing on end. There was something off, something evil about Mr. Blume. Not in a typical science teacher way either. In straight up, that’s some bad shit kind of way. As Winston moved closer, Luce grabbed them by the shoulder. “Don’t--” Before she could finish that sentence, Mr. Blume vaulted over his desk and hurtled towards them with unnatural speed.
Winston frowned for a moment, “I definitely think that I would be the type to think that I was totally fine when in actuality I would be moments away from passing out, besides, I’m not exactly the best with blood and shock and stuff…” they sighed and shook their head gently before continuing. “Either way, if I do get a tattoo I will do everything that I can to be entirely honest with whoever is putting a permanent mark on my body. Seems like it is in my best interests really.” They noticed Luce’s expression and immediately realised that she hadn’t felt the same. But now didn’t exactly seem the time to ask her about it, so Winston decided that they would simply have to ask about it later. Or not at all. Depended on how they felt it would be received. They didn’t want to intrude after all. “Fuck, run,” Winston didn’t need to see the empty look in Mr. Blume’s eye, they didn’t need to see the way that they had cleared that desk with a single bound and they didn’t need to see the bee line that they were making towards them, “run run run.” They were pushing Luce out of the door and sprinting after them. “I don’t remember Mr. Blume doing that when we had chemistry together, even when I forgot my homework a few too many times.”
As soon as Mr. Blume yeeted himself over the desk, Luce had already turned on her heel and started sprinting away. Thank god she didn’t go running this morning, her legs were fresh and she needed the extra oomph, given she was hauling ass in heavy fucking boots. “Less quipping, more running!” Luce yelled over her shoulder as she booked it down the hallways. The school was empty, which worked out in their favor. But, as she looked behind her, Luce saw that Mr. Blume was hot in pursuit and gaining fast. There was something about his eyes, a dead look behind them, that just screamed ‘oh fuck no’ to her. “This way! Shortcut outta school!” Grabbing Winston’s arm, she pulled a hard right down one of the hallways towards one of the back entrances she’d used to cut class back in the day. Here’s hoping the door lock was still busted. As they neared the double doors, Luce kicked her foot out to push open the door and ran outside into the darkness.
It was all that Winston could do to stop themselves from screaming and swearing. Something that they weren’t about to do in front of someone who they had grown up in semi awe of. “Good idea, more running,” Winston said as they glanced over their shoulder and realised that Mr. Blume was easily keeping pace, in fact they might’ve even been gaining on them. Winston was sure that if Mr. Blume had seen them back in the day then they would’ve definitely told them off for running. Luce seemed to know exactly where they were going however, and as Winston saw that Mr. Blume was maybe seconds behind them they tried to pack on a final burst of speed as they exploded out of the school and into the perpetual night. “My car is in the car park, we should just get the fuck out of here and get someone more qualified to deal with this to help.” Things were going well, they were really making progress, they were getting further and further away and then of course, Winston Dane, the clumsiest person in the world had to have two left feet and trip over a curb.
Luce nodded at Winston’s plan-- it was as good an idea as any and whatever the fuck Mr. Blume was clearly wanted both of them dead. He looked human enough, so maybe if they lured it to the police station, the police would just riddle him with bullets and that would end that situation? Just make up some story about the guy going nuts and trying to murder them? But, as soon as they made it out into the parking lot, Winston tripped and fell over the edge of the curb. Pausing to help them up, Luce gritted her teeth together as she saw that Mr. Blume had not, in fact, been tricked by the sharp turn. “Fuck it.” She said, glancing over her shoulder to make sure she and Winston were the only ones around before holding her hands out and letting free a burst of magic. A ball of fire the size of a softball, concentrated and burning a bright white, soared from her hands towards Mr. Blume. “Get fucked, old man!” She yelled. But, instead of engulfing him in flames, something weird happened. The fire seemed to dissipate, recede, the colors growing dimmer and dimmer until there was nothing but smoke in front of him.
After learning the truth about the Vural family, Winston had suspected that Luce could also do magic too, but they weren’t about to admit that to them without letting them explain it first. But apparently when she had thrown a literal ball of bright white fire at Mr. Blume, that wasn’t something that they were going to need to do. “Yeah, get fucked…” Winston had made it to their feet just in time to see the fire expand around Mr. Blume, it should’ve burned them away and yet the magic just seemed to dissipate and vanish as if the oxygen around them had been snuffed out, “okay we should definitely run,” Winston said sprinting past Luce and grabbing her hand, pulling her towards their complete shit mobile. Their ankle twinged gently as they ran, the mostly healed wound that they’d received from the weird gremlin thing at UMWC not loving the amount of aerobic exercise that they were getting. Looking back, Winston tried to think of something that would buy them more time, do anything to get them more space, they had a plan, but it would take them a minute to enact it and they wanted to make sure they were in the car first.
The effort of throwing the ball of fire barely winded Luce, but it was the irritation of watching the man just continue to pursue them that really got to her. What the fuck? How did he just do that? There was no way that he would have been able to just… dissolve her magic like that. It was a fucking fireball. Letting out growl under her breath, she raised her hands again, intent on nuking this man into the ground. But, before she could conjure up another ball of flames, Winston had grabbed her hand and yanked her towards their car. “I can take him!” She protested, but when she saw the way that they were limping, she gritted her teeth. Even if she wanted to try and duke it out with Mr. Blume, there was no way that Winston would be able to manage. They shouldn’t be caught in the middle of this shit. “Ah screw it, the car it is.” She said, running ahead towards the familiar looking vehicle. “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!” She yelled, watching as Mr. Blume continued his relentless pursuit after them.
“You can absolutely take him I am completely and totally sure of it, but at the same time the guy just absorbed what looked like a white hot fireball, which by the way was very very cool, and I don’t really want to find out what the hell else they can do.” Winston reached into their pocket and dropped their keys immediately. Great. “Uh, if you could throw a few more fireballs at him whilst I get the keys then that would be great,” Winston was already pressed flat to the tarmac of the car park, they were wriggling under the very greasy and dirty underside of their car in an attempt to reach their keys, praying that they would be able to get them before whatever the hell Mr. Blume was got to them first. Somehow they didn’t think that when their old chemistry teacher got their hands on two of his former students that he was going to explain covalent bonds to them or quiz them on the periodic table.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me.” Luce groaned, but stepped up to bat nonetheless. Rolling her sleeves up, she took a deep breath. Calm. Steady and calm. Disregard the neighbor kid behind her fumbling with their keys, completely ignore the murderous chemistry teacher on a warpath. Just straight up forget the fact he’d made her fireball completely vanish in a puff of smoke. None of that mattered, none of it. There was only the fire inside her. The burning, white hot energy. Flames she so carefully stoked and tended to, urging her onwards. And all she had to do was let them free. With a sharp exhale, Luce held out her hands and jets of red hot fire streamed out from her palms. Not fireballs, he’d already demonstrated he didn’t give a shit about those. No, she was going for volume this time. The parking lot lit up with the red hot glow of flames, shooting twenty feet in front of her from both of her hands. Aiming at the ground, she urged the magic on, fueling the fire to burn, even on the empty asphalt. Pulling back her hands, sweat dripped down the side of her face as she glared triumphantly at Mr. Blume, who had stopped for a moment on the other side of the flames.
As Winston’s fingers curled around the ring of their keys, they dragged them towards them and managed to bound up to their feet, slipping their keys in the lock of the car they pulled the door open and slipped the keys into the ignition. As they turned it and heard the car roll over a few times before sputtering into life, Winston thanked whoever had given them luck today because their car never ever started first time. Turning around, they were just in time to see Luce’s hands fire … well flames in great jets in front of them. A huge wall of fire erupted into life and Mr. Blume was hidden from view. Winston’s jaw fell slack and they were awe struck by the sheer display Luce had made. They’d managed small magic but nothing as big as what Luce had just done. For a moment, Winston was convinced that she’d saved them. Second time lucky right? And then, the most terrifying thing that Winston had ever seen happened. Mr. Blume appeared inbetween the flames that licked the open air, and then stepped through the magical inferno, causing the flames to shy away from their form as they made their way forwards. The heat seemed intense however, and Winston was convinced that they could see some of the skin on Mr. Blume’s face sizzle in the heat of the air, but they were through the wall of fire and making their way towards the car. “Luce, get in now!” they snapped, throwing the door open as they spun the car around and revved the engine, ready to speed away.
The second Mr. Blume vanished from sight, Luce had a fleeting moment of exhilaration. She’d done it, she’d made him back off. Maybe she’d even-- before she could get too happy, he appeared again, in the middle of the flames. Her magic was repelled away from him, skirting around his form as he took a slow step towards her. His eyes stared at her, unflinching, entirely focused on her. A chill ran down her spine and she recoiled. “What are you?” She asked, more to herself than to him. Before either of them could respond, Luce heard Winston’s car roar to life, heard them yell at her to get in. They didn’t need to tell her twice. Turning tail, she ran for the door and slid inside, slamming the door shut. Grabbing hold of the Oh Shit Handle, she stared through the window as Mr. Blume continued to come for them. “Let’s get the hell outta here!”
“You don’t need to tell me twice.” Mr. Blume was sprinting towards them, Winston could hear their footsteps and see them hurtling towards them in their rear view mirror. They shifted gear, slammed their foot on the accelerator and felt the wheels spin in place for a moment before the car shot off. Keeping their eyes bouncing back from their mirrors and the windscreen, Winston reached inside of themselves and harnessed the well of energy that they accessed in times of magical need. Taking a deep breath, they began chanting under their breath. Mr. Blume was moving with surprising speed and Winston could see them cutting across the car park as Winston was forced to weave between the cars that were still parked here, which wasn’t many. As they reached the exit to the school, Winston turned left and finished their incantation. As they turned left an identical copy of their car appeared to peel off towards the right. Winston slammed the speed on, heading towards the one place that they could think of which might have some information on what the hell this all was and what was going on here. “Fuck, that was really fucking close.”
As they zipped out of the parking lot as quickly as Winston’s car would allow, Luce slumped in the back seat, panting from the effort. Doing a mental check of her energy levels, she grimaced. She’d expended more of her energy on that than she’d originally thought she would. And it didn’t even phase him. What the fuck was Mr. Blume? As she stared out the window of the car, she was startled to see an illusion of their car appear in the middle of the road. What? That wasn’t her. Which meant… Leaning forward, Luce grabbed the back of Winston’s seat to stabilize herself. “Winnie. When were you gonna tell me you were a spellcaster, huh?” She asked, exhaustion letting her annoyance come through in her tone a bit more than she intended.
Perspiration beaded on Winston’s forehead as they slammed their foot down as hard as it would possibly go. They knew that they needed to eat, but they would have to do that later. But they’d found that for them, after using any amount of magic it was important to have a sudden and ferocious hit of calories as soon as possible to avoid too much of a deficit. “Sorry, I ….” they swallowed, “towards the beginning of this year I found out about all of this and I just haven’t been telling people about it because honestly I’m not very good and I also know that with Miriam Flemming out there it isn’t exactly safe to be broadcasting that information.” They took a left, then a right, then three more lefts, then two rights and another right, finally convinced that they were safe, they turned the wheel and headed for the old Scribe building. “But, we need to work out what that was and how we’re going to deal with it, because Mr. Blume is too dangerous to just leave to their own devices apparently, but I have a place we can go.”
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15x02 commentary
bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)
Hello and welcome:
@purpleskiesandcherrypies (Nat)
@dean-winchesters-bacon (Kat)
@waywardbaby (Zee)
@ain-t-bovvered (Giulia)
Nat : ready?
Zee: Yes
Zee: No
Giulia: Yeah yeah YEAH
Nat : go
Giulia: GOD
Nat : NICE
Zee: Not jack dying again
Giulia: Can they stop making me see Jack dying again
Giulia: That must be a real tiny ass town tho
Nat : Ah, something's gonna happen
Zee: I read tiny ass and was trying to figure out what it meant
Zee: Really?
Giulia: The fuck is she doing
Nat : Ah Rob
Nat : Is that still in that town?
Zee: That ain’t rob bitch
Nat : Ah yeah
Giulia: There are ALWAYS people who don’t evacuate
Giulia: PRIORITIES
Nat : Why is she not at the school
Nat : Woo? Woo girls being stabbed and it sounds like this?
Zee: Because she dum
Nat : Who is this
Giulia: AH LOL
Giulia: spelling bee
Nat : An academic ghost
Giulia: thank you NAN
Zee: Nice
Giulia: The chains are already there
Zee: Louder Sam
Nat : lol Sammy
Nat : sHorTlY
Zee: Say it like you mean it sam
Giulia: Shut up
Zee: Cas’s “we're fucked” look
Nat : I'm not their favorite
Nat : snorts
D: So you were a dick to 'em in Hell, huh?
B: No, I did my job. It's Hell. It's not a day spa.
Giulia: well he’s not wrong
Zee: Crowley whiplash
Zee: Poor dean
D: Why are you helping?
Giulia: YEAH why
I told you, I like Hell the way it was. I'm a good soldier.
Can I direct you to Dean’s “surprised” eyebrows at the ‘ I’m a good soldier?’ I think that tell a lot.
Giulia: ESCAPE ATTEMPT
Nat : Dangerous ghosts
Nat : Touble T?
Zee: Jack the Ripper
Nat : Great
Giulia: OH GREAT COOL
Giulia: cool cool cool
Nat : How is Jack the Ripper in the US tho
Zee: Because that’s where the Winchester’s challenged Chuck Nat
Giulia: Idk man...americans likes to have everything
Nat : Claiming ghosts that are not theirs
Giulia: AND of course there must be the stupid humans
Nat : Ah, this reminds me of something
Giulia: Oh look a ghostmeeting
Zee: Claiming ghosts, raising hell. The hell business
Giulia: OH that’s Jack the ripper then
Nat : Apparently MYSTERY SOLVED
Giulia: Where’s the accent
Nat : He apparently adapts
Nat : Wow, that's a great idea to sneak in
Giulia: AH sneeky humans
Zee: WHY?
Giulia: Hope u get killed Stupid fucks
Nat : I can't get over the weird ghosts
Zee: Look at that close up
Giulia: you are so pretty Charles
C: I just think we need to tell the family something. I mean, we found his wife's body.
S: Cass, we will. When we can.
C: When we can?
he’s so done. lol
Nat : The squint of Cas eyes tho
Giulia: always
R: KNOCK KNOCK
Zee: THE QUEEN
R: Am I interrupting something juicy?
Zee: Samuel
R: Castiel ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
Giulia: I LOVE THEM
Nat : As if she doesn't want to help
Nat : SAMUEL NO
Giulia: Samuel nou
Zee: Them bow legs
Nat : Dean's hair
Giulia: That stare is so not normal Sam. Please get on with the program
Nat : I am not entirely happy with these ghosts, honestly
Giulia: Well The ripper is not that bad
Zee: Ketch
Giulia: KETCH
Nat : Ugh
Giulia: what’s that horrible suit tho
Nat : Dean's happy though. He just doesn't know how to show it
I know! he looks a bit happy lol.
but also
I mean...
Nat : Yeah, but that's about it
Giulia: Ketch looks tanned
Giulia: Oh COME ON, can we not
Zee: Asking for single malt whiskey in the middle of the apocalypse. What a queen
Nat : Eyefuck
Zee: Is this awkward or not?
Giulia: They gonna fuk
K: Jack?
B: Um no, I get that a lot
Nat : I get that a lot lol
Giulia: OH SHUT UP
Zee: Now I’m under jacks
Giulia: Oh does ketch knows him
Giulia: OH
Nat : Oh, he is a treat you just don't know it yet
Giulia: Yeah
Zee: What?
Giulia: OH
Nat : Is that Amara
Giulia: HELLO
Nat : Ah
Giulia: AAAH
Zee: WHAT THE FUCK?
Giulia: smite
Nat : I think it's probably the other way round
Nat : He's the darkness
Zee: Game of thrones ending ! Lol
Giulia: NO IT WAS NOT PRETTY GREAT FUCK OFF
Asshole: You said you'd keep us safe.
Zee: Take a deep breath Cas
Giulia: DON T TRY WITH CAS
Nat : The dimples of discontent
R: So, uh, tell me about Arthur Ketch.
Giulia: ROWENA FOCUS
Dean’s not really having it today lol
D: Rowena, we have ourselves a crisis on our hands, okay? Find yourself another boy toy.
Nat : Boy Toy
Giulia: BOY TOY
Zee: Don’t I ?
Giulia: AHAHAHA
Nat : hey
Giulia: no ok but she really don t
Nat : H E Y
Giulia: AWKWARD
Zee: Dropped the puck
Giulia: oh.......Are we doing this
Nat : Ah great to remind him Cas. Well done
Giulia: Yikes
C: I didn't tell you about Jack, and then after what
happened with your mother...
Zee: Yikes
Zee: Shut up
Giulia: YIKES
C: You're angry
Nat : Dean bb
D: This mess... all the messes. It turns out that we're just hamsters running in a wheel our whole lives. What do we have to show for it, huh? Tell me you don't feel conned. God's been lying to you, Cass, forever. You bought into the biggest scam in history.
Giulia: HAMSTERS well he right
C: ou don't think I'm angry? After what Chuck did? After what he took from me?He killed Jack. But that doesn't mean it was all a lie
Zee: Mourning dad
Giulia: Oh no Cass
Giulia: Well he’s not wrong
D: really?
C: Chuck is all-knowing He knew the truth, he... he just kept it to himself.
Nat : Awe Cas
D: Well, now that his cover's blown, everything that we've done is for what? Nothing?
Zee: Dean is about to snap tho
C: Even if we didn't know that all of the challenges that we face were born of Chuck's machinations, how would we describe it all? We'd call it "life". Because that's precisely what life is. It's an obstacle course, and maybe Chuck designed the obstacles, but we ran our own race. We made our own moves. And mostly, we did well with that.
Giulia: Bb
Nat: Great speech
Giulia: I love it
D: Did we? I'll tell you what we do know. Nothing about our lives is real. Everything that we've lost, everything that we are is because of Chuck. So maybe you can stick your head back in the sand, maybe you can pretend that
we actually had a choice. I can't.
Giulia: DEAN
Nat : I can see Demon!Dean a little
Giulia: dean is MAD
Giulia: M. A. D
Zee: You shut your mouth
C: Dean. You asked, "What about all of this is real?"
We are.
Zee: WE ARE
Nat : WE ARE
Giulia: WE ARE
Giulia: MY GOD
Nat : SOBA
Giulia: I HAVE CHILLS
Zee: Ok. I love him
Giulia: GREAT SPEECH
Giulia: *clapping *
I can’t believe that actually happened right in front of my salad
Nat : It's not really ME
Giulia: Oh ok
Nat : snorts
D: You guys didn't come up with a cool weapon for Him, did you?
K: No
K: So, um... Tell me about the witch.
Giulia: NO STOP THAT
Zee: Trouble. Ya think dean? You’re in a town filled with idiots
Giulia: im still in cas’ speech tbh
Zee: Focus
Giulia: IT WAS A GREAT SPEECH
Nat : So can we move away from ghosts in the next ep
Giulia: Yeah I’m already tired of them
Nat : I'm salty we waste two episodes on them
Giulia: what
Zee: What?
Giulia: OH
Giulia: OOOOH
Nat : AH
Zee: Aaaa
Giulia: KEVIIIIIN
Giulia: BB
Giulia: MY BABY
Nat : Hello smalls
Giulia: MY BEAUTIFUL STRESSED BB
Zee: Advanced placement
Giulia: wasn’t he in HEAVEN
Giulia: oh great
Giulia: BITCH
Nat : DEAN IS PISSED
Giulia: FUCK HIM
Nat : Dean? I try
Giulia: NO GOD
Giulia: FOCUS NAT
Zee: God’s a dick
Nat : GOD CAN SUCK MY DICK
Giulia: well Amara seems calm
Nat : Ah, that's the oriental room we saw once on IG
Nat : She's not
Zee: She really isn’t
Giulia: Oh look he wanna tap out
Giulia: AHAHAHAH HE ANNOYED HIS SISTER
Nat : It's not you. She knows
Zee: He’s buttering her up
Nat : I thought she was lil sis?
Giulia: Oh what if he needs her for his new project
Zee: The cogs are turning
Giulia: OH HE IS HURT
Nat : I hope that they won't fuck
Giulia: what
Giulia: HEY COME ON
Zee: Nat!! Ffs
Giulia: IT’S 8:30
Zee: It’s not a time thing Giuls
Nat : We are watching SPN at 8.30 what does that say about us.
Nat : We will be salty the whole da
Giulia: we like pain
B: I guess I just assumed you two pros woulda wrapped it up by now.
Nat : Whiny Kevin?
Nat : Shut up
Giulia: Typical millenial
Giulia: ...WHAT
Giulia: omg
Nat : No, it's actually Gen Z
Zee: What?
Giulia: NICE
Zee: Bitches focus
Giulia: but also
Giulia: ....I DON T LIKE THAT
Nat : Ah great
Nat : Like we all don't worry at all
Nat : So sick of ghosts UGH
Giulia: oh remember those scenes in the season trailer with dean being conflicted and sad with the colt?
Nat : U
Nat : G
Nat : H
Giulia: SNORTS
Zee: Yeah. Don’t !!
Nat : stop
Giulia: they all know Kevin Tran
Nat : I think it's universal that ghosts knows each other
Giulia: Sam and dean
Giulia: Sam and dean
Giulia: US
Giulia: Our chat is hell lol
Zee: Thanks
Ketch and Rowena flirting again
Giulia: I DON T CARE ABOUT THOSE TWO. UGH WHY IS THERE ORG CHEM
Nat : I AM CONFUSED
Zee: Is this gonna be Ketcena?
Giulia: HATE THAT. Hate all of that. So much
Nat : I swear if we are still stuck in the ghost town by ep 3 I'm gonna flip a fucking table
Giulia: Is this flirting
Zee: Dean is cockblocking for once
Nat : He knew
Giulia: he feels these things
Nat : Ah, they know each other
Giulia: WHY THEY ALL KNOW EACHOTHER
Also Rowena needs to revaluate her standards
Giulia: what is this
Zee: We’ve established that
Nat : Hey, don't insult Marry Poppins you fuck
Nat : Great
Giulia: ....
Nat : Have I mentioned that I hate ghosts
Giulia: Wow that was lame
Nat : What is this episode
Giulia: Ghosts
Nat : It's lame
Giulia: Why can he do that
Giulia: This is the last we see Kevin
Giulia: Just realized
Giulia: I don t wanna
Giulia: Awe Dean
Zee: Excuse me while I drool a bit
Nat : Meh
Zee: What?
Giulia: Of course
Zee: Oh fuck
Nat : I saw that he wasn't wearing the chain
Giulia: How they took it out tho
Giulia: GREAT
Nat : I'm so not into the episode
Giulia: yeah It s weak
Nat : Both of them were tbh
Giulia: WHY DO I HAVE ADS
Giulia: FUCK
Zee: Yah me too
Nat : This might be unpopular opinion
Giulia: well it’ll pick up
Nat : Idc
Zee: But is the ghost thing over?
Giulia: 🤷🏼♀
Nat : But it makes me mad that we waste 2 episodes
Giulia: Tiny smile
Giulia: KEVIN
Nat : The eyebrow
Giulia: IM SO ANGRY
Nat : Look at the eyebrow
Zee: Relax your forehead Sam
Giulia: SANGRY
Zee: Is that eyebrow stuck?
Giulia: can relate
Giulia: IMMA CRY
Nat : Shut up Belphy
Nat : LOVE YOU GUYS
Giulia: KEVIN BB
Giulia: LOVE U GUYS
Giulia: SOBS
Giulia: SOOOB
Giulia: I love you kevin
Giulia: OH NO
Zee: Oh fuck Oooooffff
Giulia: IS THIS THE FIRST OF THE GOODBYES?
Nat : I feel Amara Amara is my spirit animal
Giulia: You sing backup
Giulia: Oooooooh burn
bUT HEY , maybe Amara will be one of those rare females on spn to not die
Zee: I kinda like her now
Giulia: I’m done chuck
Zee: Petulant
Giulia: Petulant narcissist
Giulia: Oh can Amara seal his ass away
Giulia: AH SUCKS FOR U
Nat : We'll still be stuck in ghost town next ep aren't we
Zee: Ya think Rowena ?
Nat : Ugh eyes twitch
Giulia: Well it is the major problem
Giulia: TRAILER TIME
after
Nat : Yeah
Nat : GREAT
Giulia: ...
Giulia: OH NO
Giulia: NOPE
Giulia: NOOOPE
Giulia: NOPE
Giulia: SAM CRYING
Giulia: NO
Giulia: I HATE IT
Zee: WHAT WAS THAT?
Giulia: I HATE THIS
Giulia: FUCK OFF
Zee: Like
Giulia: NO
Zee: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?
Nat : I'm salty
Giulia: IM ALREADY CRYING
Giulia: Please, It’s too soon for Rowena come on
Giulia: Nat
Giulia: HARD NOPE
Zee: Fuck off
Giulia: HATE IT
Giulia: HATE IIIIIIIT Next episode is canceled
Zee: Like, get in the mood for next ep
Giulia: What next ep?
Zee: We both know we’re gonna be there
Giulia: The next one is 15x04
.
.
.
If you want to get tagged send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.
TAGS: @wayward-angelgirl @destiel-honeypie @mariekoukie6661 @dragontamerm @closetspngirl @rainflowermoon @mattiecat @bunnybaby121115 @aliaitee2 @jacks-word-of-the-day @4evamc @dammitsammy @legendary-destiel @winchesterprincessbride @destielhoneybee @castiellover20 @jacks-word-of-the-day @ravenhg @evvvissticante
#supernatural 15x02#spn 15x02#15x02 spoilers#15x02 commentary#spn commentary#raising hell#15x02 Raising Hell#spn gifs
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I guess there’s new Sword and Shield news. You can expect salt, but perhaps not as much as you’d think.
Let’s start with this: Gigantamaxing or whatever the fuck it’s called is straight up just Mega Evolution downgraded to three turns. Fuck this stupid adjustment, this is absolutely ridiculous. Oh, but the new moves are sure gonna be great! Like the Rock one that just deals crazy damage and sets up Stealth Rock! Yeah, instead of nerfing the biggest problem with competitive, let’s just make it even more easy to do! Fucking Christ, you haven’t even shown off all the Pokemon, and you’ve somehow already broken competitive play worse than it already was. I hate this. It’s literally just, point for point, exactly the same concept as mega evolution, but for no reason, it’s adjusted to be some three-turn power-up with Z-moves built in for some reason. Because balance! I regret to inform you, Pokemon Company, that the problem here is no universal buff will ever play out for balance. By making this effectively a universal buff, you’ve essentially just made it so that Lando-T and Heatran can mega evolve. So if you honestly believe that this is going to make things equal, and that people will try out all sorts of combinations of Gigantamaxing or Dynamaxing of favorite Pokemon? You’re way more incompetent than I thought. You learned absolutely nothing from Z-moves.
That said...if this means that some Pokemon Dynamax, which is like a flat boost to stats, while others Gigantamax, which is considered a much more potent improvement on their stats, abilities, and typing? That’s essentially bringing back Mega Evolution, which is what I wanted in the first place. This means Mawile and Banette have something to work with. My only complaint is that it lasts 3 turns. That severely limits some of these mega forms. Venusaur is a good example. For three turns, it gains a ton of bulk...and promptly loses it, and is easily taken out again. Mawile is super powerful for a turn, but because it’s still slow, it’s reliant on Sucker Punch...which makes it easy to play around with no repercussions now. Banette gets to be super good, but good luck playing to its actual strengths of status spreading and priority Destiny Bond when you only have three turns to work with. It’s essentially bringing back mega evolution, but it’s also a severe downgrade for those Pokemon, meaning they take a serious hit.
Of course, all of this is assuming it’s actually just a different form of Dynamaxing. Like, the Serebii page specifies that Pokemon can only do this if they were caught in Max Raid Battles, which is severely limiting in its own right, but also implies that this isn’t quite mega evolution. Best case scenario, mega evolution is now considered some inherent thing within the Pokemon, assigned by whatever made them a Max Raid Battle Pokemon, which means you no longer need mega stones, they can just do the mega evolution and hold an item like Mega Rayquaza, but it’s been adjusted to have that level of power for only three turns. Worst case scenario, Pokemon with mega evolutions don’t have Gigantamax forms, and this is being considered a complete do-over on megas. In which case, please give Absol’s Gigantamax form a Fairy typing and Tough Claws, like it deserved.
Really, I’m still incredibly apprehensive, but this is, essentially, the return of Megas, with an attempt to rebalance the system. Which...is what they said they would do, and potentially could go over well. Only potentially, though. The Gigantamax Pokemon we’ve seen keep the same abilities as their base form, so there’s no guarantee anything good comes from this. But it’s at least a slight hope that they’re not just removing megas entirely.
On to other things. Not only are there version exclusives, but now the types in the gyms are different depending on the version! ...show of hands, anyone else think that’s a little much? I know we had Iris and that other guy in Gen 5, but they were at least both Dragon type, and the difference was mostly cosmetic. But now we have one version giving a Fighting type leader, and the other giving a Ghost type leader. I dunno. I’m not really mad about it, it just strikes me as a really odd choice. Their mains are Hitmontop and Mimikyu. Not surprised Mimikyu was favored enough to make it in, but you heard it here first, folks: Sword and Shield will be making Hitmonchan a competitively viable Pokemon. After all, one of the purposes of trimming down the Pokedex was to balance the meta, so this is hard confirmation that Hitmonchan will be competitive viable with this game’s release.
Version exclusives are starting to be noted, and...yeah. Thanks, I guess. Version exclusive Pokemon definitely isn’t a useless, awful concept at this point anymore.
New Pokemon, cool. One of them in Gigantamax form is a huge cake, so I guess that’s a thing? What kind of bizarre design is its base form going to ha-OH MY GOD THAT’S THE CUTEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN! Alcremie is so precious. Please don’t evolve it. That’s actually my favorite now. Holy shit I love you tiny whipped cream child. And Gigantamaxing basically means it got a mega, so that’s pretty cool. Oh man, this is starting to win me over. Keep it coming, what else we got?
Okay Rolycoly. That’s a neat little thing. And apparently its new ability doubles speed if hit by a Fire or Water attack. Since it’s Rock, Water is dangerous, but it might be able to survive. Switching in on Fire attacks, though? That’s gonna be fantastic. Unlike Alcremie, who is perfection, I kinda hope this one evolves. It just looks like something that would have an evolution, you know?
Duraludon is pretty cool looking, and Dragon/Steel is a great typing, I’m kinda glad we got another. I hope this one’s good, but I’m scared it’s the pseudo-legend. It fights with Tyranitar. That implies this is a higher-tier thing. I want to believe that no 4x weakness means it can’t be the pseudo-legend, but...I don’t think that’s a requirement, considering we had Metagross, and I think Goodra counted as well.
That’s it for actually new ones, but I never commented on the last two: Yamper’s cute, and Impidimp is the stuff of nightmares, why did they make that the first Fairy/Dark type?
New characters are...fine? Fighting type leader seems cool, Ghost-leader seems kinda weird. Rose and Oleana are...interesting. I guess. Mostly Rose has me worried. He seems like a sports person. I know they’ve only mentioned the Pokemon League, but I still worry every reveal about seeing Pokemon Soccer as a thing.
Overall, I...I largely like this one. Mark it here, folks: this is the first good reveal for me since we started this. Not since the starter reveal have I felt positively about this game. Well...”postitively.” There’s still a lot of concern I have around Gigantamaxing, whether aspects of mega evolution are continued in this form or not, whether something like Gigantamax Gyarados is getting the Water/Dark typing with Mold Breaker, or it’s just keeping Water/Flying and Intimidate/Moxie like its base form, etc. A lot of my positive feelings on this come down to whether Gigantamaxing is really just a re-tooled mega evolution. If it’s mega evolution repurposed for a three-turn effect, and we can expect adjustments in the transformation, that’s fine. I will actually be completely okay with that, because at the end of the day, Gigantamaxing feels like it’s doing the same thing mega evolution did: giving more significant boosts to the weaker Pokemon that needed it. That is literally all I have ever asked of you, Pokemon Company. If you can deliver on that, I will retract my decision to not get this game.
Although I gotta be real, Alcremie is already making me reconsider on its own...
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BnHA Chapter 028: Cavalry Battle Part 1
Hi everyone, I have HERO A on repeat. Time for some Sports Fest antics.
Previously on BnHA: Everyone picked teams for the cavalry battle. Like a half dozen people swarmed Bakugou going PICK ME!! and he was all WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE. Deku teamed up with Ochako and Iida, but then Iida was like WELL ACTUALLY and ran off to be on Todoroki’s team. Then my new favorite, Mei, was like HEY and so Deku picked her instead, and also Tokoyami, because Deku is the guy who somehow wins the entire fantasy league after sitting out the fucking draft.
Today on BnHA: The cavalry battle begins. Todoroki hints at having Daddy Issues. Deku’s team holds the others at bay through the power of zero-g, sentient bird shadows, and jetpacks. Bakugou gets trolled by some punk from class B and loses his shit. Todoroki and Deku face off.
(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 51 58 now, so any ETAs will reflect that. lol yesterday was a very productive day)
Todoroki has a pretty good thing going, not gonna lie. Iida brings the speed, Kami’s quirk is the perfect defense, and Momo can protect them against being hit by Kami’s electricity themselves. meanwhile Todoroki can probably just ice the ground and send everyone else flailing. I wonder if that would be against the rules
they’ve easily got the best defense out of the whole group, and with Todoroki as their one-man offense... everyone else needs to watch out
oh?
what are you just gonna sit this one out or something? I see he’s looking at the stands though
Todoroki. could it be that you have... Daddy Issues
because I’ve been waiting for a character with Daddy Issues, Todoroki
just. it’s another Thing That I Like, bud, so I’m just warning you now
(ETA: need I even say anything more here)
OHO
oohhhh
this must be the famous Endeavor we’ve heard so much about, then :D
and you know, I’d been wondering why he never uses his fire powers, and ever since he mentioned that his dad was a flame hero, I had a feeling that it might be something like this
so I see he does indeed have Daddy Issues, and self-imposed weaknesses on top of that! boy that sure is stupid, Todoroki
(ETA: even though he has Reasons, I still stand by this statement. he’s allowed to be dumb, though; he’s a kid and he’s been through a lot.)
so now let’s talk about this Endeavor guy. I can immediately see that he, like Vongola Primo before him, just refuses to ever not be on fire at all times. there’s just no reasoning with these people
also this dude literally has a mustache made of fire, which is just the most excellent thing I’ve ever seen
I mean, the beard is also cool, but. the mustache. SO UNNECESSARY. SO BIZARRE. I FUCKING LOVE IT SO MUCH
yay we’re finally gonna get started
WOW the gap between first place and third place in that first competition was a whopping 9,999,800 points, apparently. lmao
that’s not how point distribution usually works, U.A. but, you do you
so my boy Kacchan has Sero and Mina on his team in addition to Kirishima. Sero’s tape skills will definitely come in handy offensively. and Mina... FUCKING WHAT IS YOUR POWER ALREADY, MINA. at this point I really need to know, because the anime seems to assume that everyone watching already knows, so they have no problem showing it, and so whenever she comes up on screen I have to like shield my eyes and block my ears because I don’t want to be spoiled :/
(ETA: this was a thorn in my side for so long, it’s a relief to finally not have to worry lol)
and now our second place winner from the previous match, Todoroki, who’s worth... 205 points
this is like fucking Quidditch. why even have other parts of the game. just everybody go after the damn snitch
not wasting any time, I see
honestly it’s kind of a waste to go after him right off the bat, unless you’re Todoroki and your team has a nearly unbeatable defense. whoever gets Deku’s headband first is just gonna paint a target on their own backs. I expect Bakugou to go for it anyway, of course, but really it’s just stupid
and that’s, of course, assuming that Deku and his surprisingly excellent team can’t fend them off regardless
yes, Steel Ryohei, everyone does indeed know that
omg
you go, Hagakure. honestly, the odds seem pretty damn stacked against your team, but best of luck
god I’m struggling with Tokoyami’s name. but I won’t give up!! PLUS ULTRA
anyway so he asks Deku what they should do and Deku’s like RUN AWAY DUH
uh oh looks like that’s not gonna be quite so easy
this vizard guy appears to have a quicksand quirk or some sort. quicksand has always traditionally been a millennial thing. who gave you permission to take it
well, Ochako, better get to it
OH WAIT
LOOOOOOL I FORGOT ABOUT THE JETPACK
JETPAAAAAACK
jetpacks are also a millennial thing, but fine, just let all these gen z manga kids take all of our cool stuff then. that’s what happens when the series is being written by a millennial, I guess
I sure hope Deku is having the time of his life right now
Jirou is going after them with her headphone jacks lol. what are those gonna do
couldn’t even get close
that’s so cool that his shadow can take care of even the stuff they don’t see coming
I just went back to chapters 5 and 7 to check Toko’s rankings, and he got 9th overall in the practical part of the entrance exam, and then 5th in the gym tests they did with Aizawa on the first day. so he’s a pretty big threat all things considered
Deku does indeed seem to be having the time of his life!
I like watching these kids fly around and have fun
apparently everyone is weightless except Ochako! good job not puking so far, Ochako! you’ve gotten stronger!!
oh wow, bit of a jealous moment for her here after Deku offhandedly praises Mei
YOU’RE BOTH GREAT, LET’S ALL BE FRIENDS AND NOT FIGHT
Hagakure’s headband has been snatched! whoops
looks like that Viktor Nikiforov-looking guy has taken it
what was it even worth, anyway, like 20 points? just sit the rest of this one out guys
I guess it’s still worth going after everyone else’s headbands, given that second place, third place, etc. are still worth fighting for if you can’t get those 10 million points for first
here comes Shouji with his hidden Mineta
oh shit Mineta’s stupid fucking grapes have gotten stuck to the cool moon shoes that Mei made
just take them off then I guess
OH SHIT THEY’VE GOT TSUYU TOO
I FUCKING KNEW WHOEVER GOT HER ON THEIR TEAM WOULD BE GETTING THEIR MONEY’S WORTH
I SWEAR TO GOD IF THAT LITTLE SHIT MINETA TRIES ANYTHING WITH HER IN CLOSE QUARTERS, I’M CALLING ENDEAVOR TO COME OVER HERE AND LIGHT HIM ON FIRE
ahahaha and here comes this lunatic at last
Kacchan also seems to be having the time of his life somehow
oooh! he tried to blast them but Toko even managed to block that!
lollll. never stop making weird faces my dear son
now Sero’s snagging him back, since he was just flying around on his own up there
apparently it’s legal for him to do that as long as his feet don’t touch the ground
so he can just go flying around all Tsuna-style as much as he wants, with Sero there to catch him at the end
do any of these pro heroes want this boy as their sidekick yet?? I’ll be pretty pissed at them if they don’t
(ETA: 3500 draft picks... I’ll take it.)
everyone is talking about how awesome class A is
and now everyone’s going “WHAT?” and “OHH?!” all of a sudden! what’s going on?
OH DAMN. SOMEONE TOOK BOTH BAKUGOU AND MINETA’S HEADBANDS
there appear to be two teams from class B with a ton of points all of a sudden, so I’m pointing fingers in that direction!
but worth noting that Todoroki has also amassed a total of 615 points now, so he’s clearly been busy as well!
Bakugou probably got his snatched while he was flying around without a care in the world solely focused on grabbing Deku’s band
oh wow it was even easier than that
THIS BOY GOT SOME MOVES HOT DAMN
and now he’s bragging about how class B purposely hung back in the first event and focused on observing the other class’s quirks instead
don’t go getting such a big head just yet, kid. come back to me once you’ve taken a stab at Izu’s headband why don’t you. you’re not the only one who hasn’t shown his quirk yet
also, what a stupid thing to be bragging about. again, the whole point of the sports festival is to show off. if you’re gonna hang back and hide then what’s even the point. I guess some of the pros watching might be impressed with your strategizing, but personally I wouldn’t have risked getting eliminated without getting the chance to do something to catch the audience’s eye
damn this kid is really going all in on his insult fest now
okay, this is at least the second time that incident has been brought up since Bakugou came to U.A. it was definitely a bigger deal than I thought. for someone like Bakugou, it can’t exactly be enjoyable to have everyone recognize you from an incident in which you were a helpless victim and needed to have your ass bailed out. that’s like the exact opposite of what he wants to be known for
and it’s a pretty fucking low blow to bring that up, no matter how obnoxiously he was running his mouth at the start of the competition. Bakugou, you have my permission to tear this guy a new one should the opportunity present itself
and now he’s snapped
I think this Viktor guy is underestimating what he’s gotten himself into here, but also Bakugou is most likely playing right into his hands by predictably getting enraged and forgetting about the real target
class B really went and created a whole rivalry with class A out of thin fucking air
well if that’s how it’s gonna be, I hope class A makes a comeback and shows everyone just why they were so hyped up to begin with
uh oh, now Deku’s starting to feel safe, what with everyone going after other teams. MISTAKE
oh dang
:D :D :D this is so much fun. GO ON AND RASSLE THEN
BONUS:
MY GIRL MIDNIGHT
“FAVORITE THINGS: VIBRANT YOUTH, THRILLS”
LOL SHE WAS ALMOST THE HOMEROOM TEACHER
HER NORMAL CLOTHES ARE SO NORMAL, BUT I GUESS HER DAY TO DAY UNIFORM IS SO SPICY THAT WHEN IT COMES TO HER EVERYDAY CLOTHES, SHE JUST WANTS TO RELAX AND CHILL
I ACTUALLY WANT TO KNOW WHAT HER QUIRK IS THOUGH LOL
(ETA: based on her use of it at the end of the finals, seems to be some kind of sleeping gas type thing that knocks people out)
#bnha#boku no hero academia#makeste reads bnha#todoroki shouto#midoriya izuku#tokoyami fumikage#uraraka ochako#bakugou katsuki#midnight#lol I read so many chapters yesterday that these recap chapters are becoming more and more distant#if I was fast enough to put up more than one a day I'd seriously consider it#but it takes too long and that's valuable time I could be using to read more chapters lmao#gotta say so far the sports festival is still the standout arc#I've still got more than two thirds of the series to go though#so we'll see what's to come!
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Ep. 14: “Make it make sense.” - Aimee
Olivia A
Nobody from my original alliance is left which is really shitty. Maddison was my #1. It’s basically 3-3 now, though. Hoping to win immunity + find an idol lol we can only hope.
Olivia A
Aimee and Pedro are talking a lot about how Sarah, Cody, and Najwah have wronged them and stuff/have been stringing them along. I never actually worked with any of them lol so it doesn’t really matter to me I’m just focusing on my game. Glad that they’re fired up though. My final alliance being with Aimee and Pedro is not what I expected but it’s where I am! Can’t dwell. I’m here! I outlasted everyone who has been voted out to this point. That is significant!
Cody A
https://youtu.be/S_xpQryciN0
Aimee
https://64.media.tumblr.com/dcc04d41bea68cf7257486f42c20d296/fe59555738f2307b-42/s540x810/b4cd40c96bedfe612feed8b8337001dc12fbff8b.gifv
Thank you Olivia for making the lol chat with her, Pedro, me and obviously the lovely host Jay. It was a perfect place to come together and just bitch fest. There is no coins between any of us so no buying advantages. Just loving Olivia with all her positive vibes. 🌈💜💙💚💛🧡❤️We really all are on equal footing.
Speaking of game tea. Cody must of had one of the pieces of the super idol and gave it to one of the Hanuha left after he won immunity. Wanna know how I know? Sarah is his final two. Najwah is his final two as well. They wouldn’t split it between the two girls, they’d both split it with Cody. But since he is immune he gave part to the girls to share this vote. Then one of them voted Olivia incase Maddison player an idol and Olivia would’ve went home with one. That’s also why they slipped up in the call beforehand saying put one vote on Olivia but couldn’t explain why. Hahah yeah oopsie. Why am I not allowed to be upset that they never told me about it and am an obvious top 4/5 and not 3. Lol it could of been me going home since old Hanuha had no idea who Olivia or Maddison were voting and it could’ve been me. And they would’ve just went oh well we have Pedro we don’t need her next vote. This just further proved there is no wiggle room with old Hanuha and I’m at the bottom of a final 4. This further proves I am not final 2 with any of them, or even 3. They also don’t have to constantly adapt like me or the others had to they can just sit and play all the way to final 3. Every time I lose my closest ally I had to go make another one. And I did, and it was with relationships that I already had established and was personable with. I like all of these people so me playing relationships vs strategy can work at the same time. What would they do if they lost one of their 3? They don’t try to connect with others so how would they adapt? It’s a question I’d really want the jury to ask.
Cody apparently told Pedro his only path to the final 3 is with Sarah. So...well....there’s that...and I’m also not in that. Everyone’s talking about oh this is for fun and relationship making and that they don’t care about winning but everything they have done has been calculated and strategic. If we all are truly just playing for fun and making relationships why aren’t they talking to others outside of their group and trying to make friends? Why did they not make much effort to bond with me except days and days after the merge??? All I see is red flags and still even now more little lies here and there that are strategic and calculated. I shouldn’t have been feeling this way or even think about flipping if they were truly handling this right with me. Why did they never just replace me with Zack in the final four chat they had after he left? We all bonded over it and it was the perfect time for us four to come together even strategically. It wasn’t a true reset like I thought, they just sat in their group still and ran with it. They’re truly lucky with their advantages and the super idol or it would’ve cost them. We all know about their group...they could have done that instead of listening to Zacks paranoia about me.
I chose Maddison over Sarah at this vote. I have a great connection with both of them and we will both be friends after this. I actually want to play this game like it is Survivor and a Sarah blindside would of made a great resume builder for the end.
Especially after the Ben blindside and all this stuff I was hearing from Pedro she was saying in order to ensure his vote like a final 3 and that Najwah is a threat and she was coming for her. Like I wanted to protect Najwah too if that was true. Also Sarah lied to Maddison and told her I was on board with the Ben vote and that I was going to vote that way too. And then they all just collectively dropped the girls after the Ben vote and stopped even trying to talk to them. Sarah is a great player and even won touchy subjects for who’s gonna win it in the end.
I’m glad Sarah and I got to talk about this after the vote. She understands, got a good laugh out of it and we talked about the things her and Pedro have been talking about.
Pedro was hearing from Cody that Old Hanuha was voting Maddison. Isn’t it SUSPICIOUS that Pedro hears the vote plan before I do!? And then they act like it’s up in the air for me and that it could be Olivia or Maddison. No it was always Maddison they just gave me a false choice but would’ve never let me sway it off her. Lol Pedro straight up told me no they’re doing Maddison.
I’m so happy Pedro and I have put our differences aside after the Grae vote. It really is kill or be killed out here. I have been talking to Pedro since we were first able to. We call ourselves Team Tumblr! So far him and I are the only tumblr survivor people on here at final 6. He has a great sense of humor and just an all around cool guy 💅🏻💜💫☀️And of course anyone that loves Michele as much as I do is top person in my book. We made a pact to never vote for each other before this vote even happened. Everyone else had their little duos and trios and here we were in the middle. Without him these last few days I would’ve went crazy. It’s funny how people try to put morals and this and that on him and think he’s a villain but he’s misunderstood just like anyone here could be. You don’t know who the villain is until you watch back at the end.
ALSO WHERE THE NUT IS MY CONDOLENCES ON MADDISON GETTING VOTED OUT?! Why am I always the one crying and apologizing and having to defend myself but I’m the one always blindsided. Why did no one console me after blindsided but expect immediate answers when the shoe is on the other foot? How is this any different? I finally did what they do to me but somehow it gets treated differently.
Lol I’m not a bitter potential juror I promise. LMAO. But I also have really good fucking points I need these people to answer if I’m there.
https://64.media.tumblr.com/cc160b6ed9bbfd511cfece4b2c96417b/be492fc5cefd11de-88/s540x810/df9747035a2fcb610c818518e41938730ab59a98.gifv
Najwah
I'm always so delayed when it comes to confessions. So last night was a bit crazy. Aimee flipped bc Pedro told her that Sarah wanted me out. Either she's talking BS or she's gullible. I know a smart move would have been to keep my superidol and play it when I really needed it at the top 6 or top 5, but I really wanted Maddison out of the game. So bad. Also, if this was a real game of survivor I would have probably flipped on Sarah too because she's a damn good player. I'd have flipped on her days ago. However, this isn't a real game of survivor and I'd rather just have a friend in the game longer. I had a conversation with Pedro last night in which he accused me of talking shit when I said I didn't really care about winning lol. He's like "you're in the top 6, of course you care" which is very funny to me. I realised that it's so much deeper for him. He really wants the title of sole survivor. I mean, at this point he deserves it lol but to disregard what I'm feeling when I say I care about the connections I've made more than winning? That makes me laugh and just shows what kind of person he is/that he's never really connected with anyone in this game. That's pretty sad. Look, even if Sarah or Cody blindside me, I'm still okay with that. I don't care. My great aunt is busy dying of covid as I type this, I am going through a bit of a depressive episode after being faced with a life altering decision with regards to my own health. I haven't seen my people in a while. Today was supposed to be our half year anniversary weekend away.i also got another job for extra cash and honestly, this game has been my solace and my fun place. I'm so thankful for the past 4 weeks. I genuinely don't care about winning. I'm just happy I get to do this and experience this and bond with people I never would have known or come across in a million years. Honestly, rather Sarah still in the game than someone who has never even spoken to me ever, Maddison. Why would I work with her at all? Anyway, it's okay. People can think I am a goat lmao. The most sad thing are people trying to create cracks and rifts between Cody, Sarah and I.
Aimee
Zack’s negative aura really is here to fuck my game left of sideways
Najwah told him about the super idol that turned into Cody knowing. Okay. Pause.
Yes, you read that right, Najwah told people who just got finished blindsiding her about her super idol. But not me. Then Sarah got an idol and told Najwah hence enabling the super idol. But isn’t that funny that Sarah so freely told Najwah she has an idol for that? Oh yeah because they were all aligned before Najwah was even included in that group. And Zack and Cody told Najwah not to tell anyone. This really put a wedge between Najwah and I on the final count numbers to the end. Najwah and I have never gunned for each other and we will continue to not gun for each other. 💞💗💖
I’m so happy she is still here and we can laugh about the Gen Z / Millennial cultural differences. We are the only Millennials left.
I got to video chat with her over my lunch today and really clear the air on survivor.
It sucks that she felt like out with Maddison. That tribe swap really painted a target on Maddison’s back.
To me it seems that everyone’s nosiness about what Najwah got at the auction is deadass the only reason she is aligned with any of them. ALL THREE OF THEM just blindsided her on the previous Leanne vote (the one Najwah literally voted for Sarah on) and Zack even wanted Najwah out. But my relationship with Najwah is somehow chopped liver and I don’t get included in on an alliance with her?!? Because I respected people’s purchases at the auction and didn’t pry for info??? Because I didn’t blindside her???
Make it make sense.
So the super idol just bonded Najwah with Zack Cody and Sarah. That’s it. That’s literally the rest of the game folks. And I guess they never had to worry about bonding with others cause they can just sit on their super idol the whole game. Must be nice.
I’m confused as to why Zacks paranoia about me flipping at swap did not apply to Sarah who also swapped with me. Other than the fact that Zack and Sarah were already aligned. Oh yeah okay, right. There it is.
So anyways they all just listened to Zacks paranoia not only about me but also about all of Maola and decided to take his word on everyone that he never actually interacted with instead of reaching out and talking to any of those people to get to know them. Or you know, talking to me. It’s the same paranoia Ben got fed to him from Zack about Maola and how much they could be playing me. And I was like where is this coming from and why are you so sure they are all liars and cutthroat savages?! NOBODY knows what went on in new-Maola except for me, Sarah, Grae, Maddison, and Olivia. (And Jay) And if I hear one more person that wasn’t in that tribe try to tell me otherwise, I am going to scream.
For the record, I never told Zack anything for any indication I’d flip. I said old Maola was nice. And I didn’t shit talk them like everyone else probably did. I literally had about a two minute interaction with him right after merge before he was kicked out. That’s it. And it was because he couldn’t resist asking me how I was feeling, as always.
Thing is, Zack is old news and somehow people did not change anything about those perceptions still. I mean, we are all still playing within the confines of the alliances Zack set up. ......Because?!?!!!?!!!
This is one giant self-fulfilling prophecy. They treated me differently, they treated me like I’d flip, so guess what, the flip finally ended up happening. There was plenty of time for all of these perceptions about me and them and Maola to change and they didn’t. No one made any effort. And then touchy subjects came out and confirmed everything I needed to know about where I stood with them. That was FOREVER after Zack left. And yet I still continued voting with them, I even VOTED for Maddison and apparently that wasn’t enough to gain my trust? Or earn my spot in a damn final four chat with them at LEAST. Not even a fake one???? And then the lies day in and day out day after day with those three and just how completely obvious they are about being in a group chat of just them three. As if I’m stupid. And it’s so blatant I sometimes wonder if they want me to know about it. Even now as I write this and since the last few votes I am still being told lies here and there. Lies for no reason and stuff that doesn’t need to be lied about. So what is it?????!! We can’t keep blaming swap and merge stuff if this is still happening to this very minute. FIX IT if you want me to work with you. Otherwise, rocks it is. 🙈🙉🙊
Aimee
Najwah! I love you!!!! Thank you so much for supporting me when I felt left out and just explaining so much game stuff to me. I appreciate you!! ❤️ Hugs to you and I’m always here for you. I cant wait for our friendship outside of this game.
Pedro Awe are fucked...honestly cody will lose to najwah, and sarah..and thats the only good thing i see coming out of them being in the final 3
Sarahhttps://youtu.be/2Ls9dB1fNgU
Aimee
https://64.media.tumblr.com/1da555dc795dd40f56a35ddf87a0ab47/a53f344a539857da-3a/s540x810/8139924235547546dd732d4531331e43c68dc1db.gifv
YAY!! Way to go Pedro on your immunity win!!! Dang! Some of those answers you put were LEGENDARY!! 😎😎😎Haha he kept saying over and over again how he’s a dead man and “see ya later guys I’m going to jury.” It’s the theme of this season.
Haha Olivia and I kept encouraging him. It’s not over until it is over. And this challenge just proves that point.
Great job Pedro!
jerry ropero feat. jacqueline - Coração
https://youtu.be/a54Wap-5cvw
The song Pedro, Olivia and I would be jamming to after his immunity win!
Cody A
https://youtu.be/5t2H-oAv6r8
Aimee
Haha loving this late night “camp” time with Cody and Sarah 🔥 ❤️
Najwah
I spoke to Sarah yesterday and she accidentally let it slip that she wants Cody or her to win immunity. I was like WTF?? Also they keep calling MY idol, OUR idol. Like she just assumes I'm going to play my idol for her again? Lol I wanted Maddison out for once and for all because she was brilliant. When I say I care about humans more than winning, I sure hope other humans feel the same but I'm sure not. I bonded with Aimee yesterday. We spoke to each other about life. I sent her what really happened with Maddison and The Ben vote because Maddison played with Aimee's emotions and said "oh I didn't know. I wouldn't have voted Ben if you were left out" etc. But the receipts state a completely different story. I'm not even going to bother trying to stop Pedro. I'm not interested in his BS. He's probably going to make it to F3 and win. I don't like how he's starting to get personal? But I guess big ups to him.
Olivia A
I was pretty sure this vote was gonna go to rocks. We haven’t found an idol and I’m pretty sure they don’t have any. Buuut, Aimee just told me she’s pretty sure Najwah is willing to flip tonight which would be amazing. Hoping for that. Rocks are scary!!
Olivia A
Pedro is always SUPER paranoid about everything so Aimme and I are nervous about him trusting the idea of Najwah flipping. What we decided to do is have Aimee tell the group chat that she wants to flip. If we can’t convince him to trust that she’s not lying I will present the idea of telling her the wrong name (we tell her to vote Cody but we all vote Sarah) to test if she actually flips while still guaranteeing that we don’t go to rocks. It’s perfect!
Pedro A
I thank the lord ..for this immunity...cause this rocks things...its scaryyyyyyy....but at the end of the day both sides know..that neither of them can make it into the end,..if they flip...........SOOOOOOO lets pray aimme doesnt flip cause im scared
Pedro A
we are kinda voting cody..so hes safe...cause of the DA....lets hope this works
Aimee
https://tenor.com/view/pokemon-bulbasaur-highfive-gif-5169485
https://64.media.tumblr.com/dc1b6fab90d3be46df5137b345c79761/eb2a62cf794f783c-94/s540x810/8d5d18d147dea390be5bf52e54132feb009dcd45.gifv
MY GIRL NAJWAH💜❤️🧡💛💚💙💜💓💗💝💖🏳️🌈Really coming through right now! We are saving each other! I’m just so happy she has finally woken up in the game.
Our bond and friendship can be seen from space. I love her so much! I’m so glad my truthfulness, positivity and all around good vibes have proven trustworthy to her.
Sarah
I don’t want to vote Aimee out but I feel like it’s all we can do to keep Cody, Naj, and I safe. I hope this plan works.
Cody A
https://youtu.be/MunX3QJvOOA
Cody A
https://youtu.be/dinc3bJrmvk
Najwah
So my decision to do this vote is basically because yesterday I realised that Sarah has a plan for Cody and her and I'm not in it. Of course it was hurtful. I wasn't going to vote Cody. In fact, I would have rather voted Sarah because after yesterday I don't think they would have saved me when it came down to rocks. Perhaps the paranoia is getting to me. And perhaps I'm believing lies but Sarah made that Freudian slip in a voice message and I don't think having me with them right to the final is part of their plan. I just hope no one changes their minds or decisions now since we have like an extra 45 minutes to think and review everyone's answers to their questions. 🤞🏽🤞🏽
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What I think about Alison Roman
Any Gen-Z’er with a Twitter account has probably seen the latest Gen-Z Icon Controversy, i.e. the one involving Alison Roman. In case you’re not caught up on its details, the tl;dr is that The New Consumer (which appears to be a one-white-man show of an online publication steered by a former Vox and Business Insider employee named Dan Frommer) published an interview with Alison last Thursday — an interview where Alison, when asked about the difference between “consumption and pollution” (as if there even is a material difference), said:
“I think that’s why I really enjoy what I do. Because you’re making something, but it goes away.
Like the idea that when Marie Kondo decided to capitalize on her fame and make stuff that you can buy, that is completely antithetical to everything she’s ever taught you… I’m like, damn, bitch, you fucking just sold out immediately! Someone’s like ‘you should make stuff,’ and she’s like, ‘okay, slap my name on it, I don’t give a shit!’
....
Like, what Chrissy Teigen has done is so crazy to me. She had a successful cookbook. And then it was like: Boom, line at Target. Boom, now she has an Instagram page that has over a million followers where it’s just, like, people running a content farm for her. That horrifies me and it’s not something that I ever want to do. I don’t aspire to that. But like, who’s laughing now? Because she’s making a ton of fucking money.”
This is the quote that most people who’ve followed this drama have latched onto, and I’ll come back to discussing it in a moment. I’m really not sure why the interview was published at all, other than for a publicity or financial boost during these times, because I don’t think anything worth hearing was uttered by either the interviewer or interviewee. Moments in the interview seemed either tone-deaf or trivial to the point where I wondered why they were included at all. Early on, for example, Alison laments that she hasn’t been making enough money during this pandemic. (She does not live in want of money.) Later she half-jokingly complains that her public persona has been reduced to “anchovy girl”, ostensibly because she often uses them in her cooking. (She does, and often proudly owns that fact, which makes this complaint pretty uninteresting.) But the point of this interview was meant to be, I think, a rumination on how Alison would turn her belief that she “isn’t like the other girls” into practice.
It’s a common thing to desire, I think — this ingenuity balanced with relatability, and I think seeking this balance is what propels so many people my age. Few things are more embarrassing to us than unoriginality, than being a carbon copy of someone else, yet few things are scarier than social rejection. We don’t want to like the same things as everybody else, but we want at least some people to like the things that we like. I think it’s what drives certain subcultures to exist in the first place, the way that subsections of people can congregate around something or someone, reveling in each other’s presence but also in knowing that they are, in fact, just a subsection of the greater population.
This mentality is, admittedly, sort of what drove me to like Alison Roman in the first place. For background: the first time I cooked a recipe of hers happened unwittingly; in December 2018, I saw the recipe for the salted chocolate chip shortbread cookies that became known as #TheCookies (Alison’s virality can be encapsulated by the fact that all of her most famous recipes have been hashtagged, e.g., #TheStew, #TheStew2, #ShallotPasta or #ThePasta), but I made them without knowing that Alison was the person behind the recipe. The cookies were good (though I think any recipe with over two sticks of butter and a pound of dark chocolate is bound to be good.) At some point about a year later, I watched a YouTube video published by NYT Cooking where she made her white bean-harissa-kale stew, and I thought she was funny and really pretty and, like me (I think), had a fastidious yet chaotic energy that I always thought made me awkward but made her seem endearing. Alison’s recipes taste good, they come together really easily, and you don’t need special equipment or a lot of kitchen space to execute them. It’s why I’ve committed at least three of them to memory, just by virtue of making them so often. I liked her recipes so much that, for over three months, one of my Instagram handles was inspired by one. But I also liked her, or wanted to be like her, or some combination fo both. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to be her friend, or that I didn’t aspire to her lifestyle of Rachel Comey clothes, glistening brass hoop earrings that cost 1/4 of my rent, regular trips to downtown Brooklyn or Park Slope farmers’ markets or small butcher shops where the purveyors all knew her name, an always-perfect red gel manicure, the capacity to eat and drink luxuriously and seemingly endlessly and to have the money for a yoga studio membership to help her stay slim anyways.
Of course all of those things are signifiers of social class more than anything else. But in oligarchical, consumerist societies, what is expensive and what is good become two overlapped Venn diagram circles, and I have not yet reached a level of enlightenment to be able to fully tease the two apart. And while I would never drop $425 on a jumpsuit, no matter how pretty I think it is, I could crisp up some chickpeas, stir in vegetable stock and coconut milk, and wilt in some greens, and act like my shit was together. I liked Alison because when I first started liking her, she hadn’t yet risen to the astronomical level of digital fame that she enjoys now, and by making her recipes, some part of me believed that I would be inducted into a small group of her fans who, by serving up her dishes, telegraphed good taste.
This idea of “good taste” is a complicated and racially charged one. Alison is white; she lives in one of the whitest neighborhoods in Brooklyn (maybe even all of New York City); her recipes cater to a decidedly young, white audience. I think another reason why her dishes hold so much Gen-Z appeal, beyond their simplicity and deliciousness, is because they sit at the perfect intersection of healthy-but-not-too-healthy and international-but-not-too-international. Her chickpea stew, for example, borrows from South and Southeast Asian cooking flavors, but you wouldn’t need to step foot into an ethnic grocery store or, god forbid, leave Trader Joe’s, to get the ingredients for it. The shallot pasta recipe calls for an entire tin of anchovies, and you get to feel cool and edgy putting a somewhat polarizing food into a sauce that white people will still, ultimately, visually register as “tomato sauce and pasta” and digest easily. All of the recipes in her cookbook, Nothing Fancy (which I received as a gift!), are like this. She doesn’t push the envelope into more foreign territory, probably because she doesn’t have the culinary experience for it (which is totally fine — I never expected her to be an expert in anything except white people food), and probably also because if she did push the envelope any further, her book, with its tie-dyed pages and saturated, pop-art aerial shots, wouldn’t have been as marketable.
That’s what’s unfortunate — that white people and white-domineered food publications have been the arbiters of culinary taste in the U.S. for centuries. I’m thinking about Julia Child, about bananas foster being flambéed tableside and served under a silver domed dish cover, about the omnipresent red-and-white-checked Better Homes & Gardens cookbook, about Guy Fieri and Eric Ripert and Ina Garten and the Bon Appétit Test Kitchen. I’m thinking about how white women have long been the societally accepted public face of domestic labor when it was often Black women who actually did that labor. It’s Mother’s Day today, and I’m thinking about how, in middle school, I’d sometimes conceal my packed lunch of my favorite dishes my mom made — glass noodles stir-fried with bok choy, cloud ear mushrooms, carrots, and thinly sliced and marinated pork; fish braised in a chili-spiced broth — so that my white friends wouldn’t be grossed out, and so that I wouldn’t have to do the labor of explaining what my food was.
And I’m thinking of that now-notorious Alison Roman quote. To be fair, Marie Kondo and Chrissy Teigen do have large consumer and media empires, which have become profitable and which require huge teams of people to sustain. Both of them probably do have large amounts of money at their disposals. What’s weird to me is that Alison accuses both Marie and Chrissy of “selling out” because they each branded their own lines of purchasable home goods, yet Alison herself said in that very same interview that she had also done that very thing. It’s just that Chrissy’s line is sold at Target, while Alison’s, according to her, is a “capsule collection. It’s limited edition, a few tools that I designed that are based on tools that I use that aren’t in production anywhere — vintage spoons and very specific things that are one-offs that I found at antique markets that they have made for me.” I suppose it’s not “selling out” if it caters to the pétite bourgeoisie. I don’t know if Alison is explicitly racist, since I don’t know if she called out two women of color simply because they are women of color, or if she genuinely just so happened to select two of them. But that she feels like she has the license to define things as “selling out” based on who the “selling-out” behavior caters to reeks of white entitlement.
There’s also an air of superiority with which she describes how she would market her product line:
That would have to be done in such a specific way under very intense standards. And I would not ever want to put anything out into the world that I wouldn’t be so excited to use myself.
She says this right before talking about Marie Kondo and Chrissy Teigen, accusing them of being lackadaisical and unthoughtful (”okay, slap my name on it! I don’t give a shit!”; “people running a content farm for her”) when she likely has no idea what the inner workings of either of their business models are. To be sure, it could very well be true that Marie and Chrissy have handed off these aspects of their brands to other people. But for Alison to assume that they have, and that her own business management style would, by default, be better because she would retain control, is egotistical.
Alison ends the interview by proclaiming that her ultimate goal is to be different from her contemporaries. She says,
To me, the only way that I can continue to differentiate myself from the pod of people that write recipes, or cookbooks or whatever, is by doing a different thing. And so I have to figure out what that is. And I think that I haven’t ultimately nailed that. And I’m in the process of figuring it out right now.
I expect that her path to “differentiation” will contain riffs on the same iterations of preserved lemons, anchovies, canned beans, and fresh herbs that she’s always relied on. I expect people will still think she’s cool, because that’s easy to achieve when her recipes and aesthetic are a series of easy-to-swallow-pills, when she tells the cameraman not to cut the footage of her accidentally over-baking her galette, and when being a white creative and working among mostly white colleagues means that she’ll get a lot of latitude. I expect she’ll continue to sell out, which is completely fine, so long as she’ll be candid with herself and actually call it selling out.
And I want to learn recipes from a chef who looks like me, and I want that chef to be “marketable” enough to achieve Alison’s level of fame. I want people of color to get to decide what recipes deserve their own hashtag. I want Alison Roman to be emotionally okay, because Twitter backlash can be vicious. And I kinda want to buy Marie Kondo’s drawer organizers now.
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