Something something, tumblr's only joke
ID: An illustration of a small flower fairy flying next to a walrus. The fairy points with one hand to the left and the other to the right, saying, "I'll try these doors, you try those, and maybe we'll find someone who can help!" The walrus replies, "Okie dokie." End ID
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inspired by the scariest words my dm has ever said to me and the subsequent coolest (AND SCARIEST) scene of my life
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so when food is too salty we might say "打死卖盐的" basically meaning "did you beat the salt merchant to death" but one time in an attempt to be a little polite and a little funny to the chef (my mother) i said "……是不是又跟卖盐的有矛盾了" meaning "are you... having a dispute with the salt merchant again" and now it's a whole thing in my family
anyway point being there has been another altercation with the salt merchant
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“their relationship is too deep to be sexual” what’s deeper than dick in hole. please tell me
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"the 'power of love' trope is such an overused and cliche gimmick" i do not care i will love it always and forever. love prevails and explodes the enemy
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a concerning amount of witchblr will be like "um actually new years was stolen by europeans from the ancient god scroobus mcdoobus" and then you actually try to research scroobus mcdoobus and it turns out he was invented in the 1940s by a conspiracy theorist who powdered every meal with ketamine and thinks that queer people are reincarnated fish
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getting blazed as fuck in public, thinking "boy I sure hope no one knows how high I am right now", and then having the jumpscare of your life when duolingo gives you this notification
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this is the funniest fucking thing he could possibly fucking say about lestat
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was talking with a friend about how some of dunmeshi fаndom misunderstands kabru's initial feelings towards laios.
to sum up kabru's situation via a self-contained modernized metaphor:
kabru is like a guy who lost his entire family in a highly traumatic car accident. years later he joins a discord server and takes note of laios, another server member who seems interesting, so they start chatting. then laios reveals his special interest and favorite movie of all time is David Cronenberg's Crash (1996), and invites kabru to go watch a demolition derby with him
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having a blorbo is like. he’s in my head. he’s in there. crawlin around. don’t know how to get him out of there. there he is.
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best comparison I can think of for the pope thing is. imagine an ESL bishop said the word “dykery” instead of “lesbianism.”
now. as a dyke, I'm not cool with straight people using it. obviously you don't need to be a native speaker to know slurs, but “dykery” is NOT a commonly used word if you're straight and want to insult queer women. it's the kind of derivative word you're way more likely to hear in a queer context. if a straight person randomly said “dykery” in the middle of a serious conversation, and a non native speaker at that, I'd be like... where on earth did they hear THAT from?
that's why I'm laughing my entire ass off at the pope thing. ofc the catholic church is homophobic. fork found in kitchen. but why is the pope using slang from drag race
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